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lokisprettygirl · 7 months

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Under his influence (Post Avengers! Loki x female reader)

Read chapter 35 here/ Series Masterlist

Chapter 36

Summary : Loki's torture ends as after years of separation he finds his way back to you.

Warning: 18+, HUGE Canon divergence (Just me making shit up), timey wimey stuff topics dealing with cheating and falling out of love, mention of pregnancy, infertility, gif is how he looked ;)

When Loki had chosen to fix the timeline again he knew he'd be in his own personal hell that he himself had created for the next few years of his life. When Frigga died all he wanted to do was run back to you so you'd hold him in your arms and comfort him but he couldn't.

After the events of Svartalfheim he pretended to be deceased and moved to midgard for a while until Thor had found him again.. he had promised the ancient one that he wouldn't interfere in your life and he didn't, first few weeks were the hardest for him, worst, at times he thought that he'd rather go through Thanos's torture again then go through this.

He wasn't able to sleep or do anything but he stayed strong, for you, for both of you. He missed you with every inch of his life, the only thing keeping him going forward was the assurance that each and every day was only bringing him closer to you.

Seven years was a long time, every morning as he awakened he thought of you and his heart broke in pieces as he realized that you must have been sad and lonely at times as well, feeling as if you're life was meaningless, fearing that you'd never fall in love with a man, would never feel the heat you so badly craved and he knew you'd feel that way for a long time to come. And he wouldn't be able to stop you from hurting this way, he really wished he could have loved you better than this but he felt helpless, time was never really on his side.

For a god seven years weren't really much but you were just a mortal.. and he knew with every passing year you were only losing more hope, losing more life as he just moved on with his own and did nothing..

Two years passed somehow and he knew you'd go on to marry Strange during this time period, he knew all about what was going to happen and he couldn't stop the precious love of his life as she got tied to another man.

As she became a wife but certainly not his.

....

"Happy birthday sweetheart" you heard your mom's voice on the phone , she was the only one to call you after Mrs Geller, at least they remembered your birthday because your own husband didn't.

"Thanks mom, what are you doing?" you asked her so she sighed,

"Y/n you know you are 35 now, you don't have much time left, are you both planning to have kids or not?" you groaned internally as she said that. You haven't really told her the truth yet. Sure your sex life was as bland as a weak tea but that didn't mean you didn't want kids of your own, you really did but nothing worked.

Even though your body was healthy and hospitable as your doctors had told you, you couldn't just get pregnant, you thought maybe Stephen was infertile but he was perfectly fine in that department as well, it was a medical mystery why you weren't able to get pregnant.

"Is that the only thing you think of all the time mom?" You asked her, bit annoyed by her inquiry. Well you were very annoyed.

"Of Course I do"

She answered so you rolled your eyes, once she hung up you got out of the bed and got ready for work, as you stepped out in the living room Stephen was there on the kitchen table reading a newspaper. As your eyes met with each other he gave you a smile that never really reached his eyes whenever he was around you. You didn't blame him either.

"Good morning" you mumbled as you made your way to the kitchen to make a quick breakfast for yourself.

"Morning, I'm off to Philadelphia today and won't return for a week" he told you nonchalantly so you nodded.

"Well..Drive safely" he chuckled as you said that.

"You don't have to worry about that anymore " he smirked so you resisted the urge to roll your eyes again.

Two years ago he had gotten into a bad accident that had almost ended his life. Doctors had told him that he'd never be able to operate again but then he went to Nepal and apparently found a mystic healer or something, you couldn't believe your eyes when he had returned perfectly fine as if nothing had happened to him, however you did notice a slight change in his demeanor, he was less arrogant and more sympathetic towards you.

For a few weeks your relationship with him had gotten better but then it fizzled again, your heart was never in the right place when you married him, you knew you shouldn't have married him. You shouldn't have married him because you sure as hell weren't in love with him, as much as you had all these fantasies about a magical love life since you were eight, it never really happened to you. You never found a man who made your heart skip a beat with his presence, gave you butterflies that would leave you gushing for days or made you feel heated just by his mere touch.

When you turned turned thirty two you had just accepted that not everyone was destined to find that sort of love so you settled for Stephen and he settled for you, though you didn't understand his reasons, because he sure as hell wasn't in love with you either.

A year later you finally built the courage to ask for a divorce and much to your surprise he agreed almost immediately, that's when he confessed to you that he had been having an affair with his colleague Christine, not that it gave you a whiplash or made you feel betrayed, you had a feeling he wasn't faithful to you.

You had been cheated on before and were still carrying the scars it had left behind but with Stephen it didn't even hurt, you were equally responsible for this, sure you never cheated on him but you were never really there either, he never really felt like a lover to you, there was no romantic love between you two and it was proven as you two had met at your parents' anniversary a few months later after the divorce, that's when you knew that a platonic friendship is what you needed from him.

You were enjoying a life where you weren't trapped in a forced loveless marriage but that wasn't to say that you liked being alone, you despised it, all you wanted to do was find a man who'd love you as crazily as you'd love him but you knew you weren't blessed enough to find him.

Even when you met guys who you felt a miniscule amount of attraction for -they were either too young or too old, and both didn't seem interested in you in that way, you would turn forty in a few years, your time had ended but accepting it was way harder than one could imagine.

The hopeless romantic in you just wanted to find love, it didn't want to give up but with every passing year you were losing your will to go on, you have always felt so hollow from deep within, but it only got worse as you entered this decade of your life. You still remembered crying all night on your 30th birthday, now you wanted to go back to being thirty again, that felt much better than this..

Ever since you had turned thirty you always felt as if you were missing a piece of your heart, as if someone owned it but you didn't remember who. You always felt as if there was a man out there for you but you weren't able to find him anywhere, as if he wasn't even from this planet.

Few more months later Stephen invited you to his birthday bash in NYC. You had moved back to Minnesota post the divorce so he flew you in and even arranged for your stay. A free lavish trip wasn't the offer you were going to say no to so the night of his birthday you put on a fancy green dress, the thin straps had cute hearts shapes attached to it and after a long time you actually felt good about yourself. You had been working out, taking care of yourself, doing everything you could to still feel a little hopeful in life and it worked until your head finally hit the bed at night and made you aware of how miserable your life has become.

As you reached the venue you met Christine and things were unsurprisingly good between you two, she was a good woman, she understood Stephen and loved him the way you never did. He deserved that. Also apparently he was a superhero now but you still didn't understand what he actually did or what his purpose was. Sometimes you really sucked at being a nice person and taking interest in other people's lives.

After dancing for a bit you felt very tired so you told Christine you were going to grab a drink.

You sat down next to a gentleman in a black suit, he was attractive. He probably was the most attractive man you had seen in your life, his raven hair went past his shoulders and when he looked at you, those green eyes bored right into your soul. You also felt as if you had seen him before, you felt as if you had known him for years.

Usually men such as him made you feel extremely nervous around themselves and insecure in a weird way but for some unknown reason you felt calm with him..

"Sorry i didn't mean to stare, i felt as if i had seen you somewhere" he chuckled as you said that, that mere smile gave you butterflies. What was happening to you? This wasn't like you at all. You had never felt such an intense attraction towards a man before, not this way.

As soon as Loki saw you from across the dance floor, all the feelings that he had been suffocating for seven years were threatening to explode but he kept his cool, you didn't remember him and he had to do it in a way that wouldn't make you feel scared of him. He had waited years to find you again, he could wait more.

"Perhaps you have seen me on the news, I invaded your planet with an army a few years ago" your eyes widened in realization as he said that.

"Oh my god you're Loki '' you said to him and he turned his head to look at you, his lips sipped on the neat whiskey he had ordered for himself. Gorgeous gorgeous guy you thought, of course he was, he was a literal god. You and your standards you thought.

"For a moment I was afraid my popularity had plummeted around here" you let out a nervous laughter as he said that. He had clearly caught you checking him out.

"Noo i.. I read about you at the time, saw you in the news ..my ex husband actually made me see why we were supposed to hate you" you mumbled as you airquoted your sentence, a bit ashamed by the reveal, you still remembered your first date with Stephen where he just ranted against Loki, so why was he there at his birthday party now?

"Well I hope your feelings are not the same anymore" you gulped as the intense eye contact made you feel flushed. Your cheeks felt warm so warm and all you wanted to do was lean into him like a pervert.

"So what are you doing here?" You asked him to avoid feeling those butterflies that were swarming in your belly.

"I was summoned here for a crucial discussion," he answered you.

"Ohhh" you mumbled.

"I watched you dancing over there" your ears perked up as he said that. There were so many gorgeous, young and gorgeous women at the party, why was he watching you? Men that looked like him never went for women like you.

"You did?" You cleared your throat as you spoke,

"You have a way with your hips don't you?" Was he flirting with you? Oh god it's been years since a man this attractive had flirted with you. A man you actually wanted to flirt with you.

"Ummm well i wanted to be a dancer once" you mumbled and suddenly felt like a fool.

"I can tell, makes me think of other situations where you could show me how those hips could work" you bit on your lips as he said that. Loki's entire self grimaced as he was clearly being obscene with you, but he was pretending to be the confident asshole he was known as, however as he noticed the way you had blushed he found himself craving your touch. It's been seven years for norns sake.

He placed his fingers on your chin to make you look at him and brought his lips to your ears, if he was some other guy you would have pushed him away by now but for some reason you felt hypnotized by his mere presence, everything about him enchanted you, you felt as if you were under his influence, his cologne attacked your senses and all you wanted to do was kiss him.

You had never felt such scorching heat with someone in your life, you never thought you'd ever get to feel it either, you didn't think it existed for you.

"Care for a dance?" He whispered in your ears and you could only whine in response which he took as a yes. His fingers laced with yours as he dragged you to a secluded corner of the hall.

Baby, you can

Ride it, ooh, yeah

Bring it over to my place

"Nice song isn't it?" He whispered in your ear so you hummed in response, it existed because of you and you didn't even know that, you were the one to send the lyrics of the song to Mark Johnson in the hope that it'll get sent to the artist. Apparently it did.

You moved slowly with him to the rhythm of the music, he placed his hands on your lower back and the action made you gasp, dipping you down slowly before he pulled you up, smushing you so close to him in a moment, your chest were pressed to him, you were too close to man you barely knew.

And you be like

"Baby, who cares?"

But I know you care

Bring it over to my place

Your hips rolled in circles and hands curled around his neck, what was this feeling? Your lips were so close to him but he wasn't kissing you, even though you wanted him to just kiss you desperately.

You don't know what you did, did to me

Your body lightweight speaks to me

I don't know what you did, did to me

Your body lightweight speaks to me

"Goddd" You whispered and a small smile curved the corner of his mouth.

"There you are i have been looking for you"

You heard Stephen's voice so you pulled away from the man you had met a few minutes ago. Even after the divorce was finalized you still felt weird about being close with another man around him.

"What happened?" You looked at him and he snickered in response.

"I was talking to him, I called him here to discuss something important"

You directed your attention towards Loki and he smiled at you before he looked you up and down from head to toe then he leaned into you to press a goodbye kiss on your cheek,

"See me again sometime later?"

You nodded as he said that, he walked towards your ex husband and went along with him, his smell lingered around you still and you had to sit down in order to calm down your nerves.

You had never felt this way before, you had lost all hope of finding a man you'd feel this level of attraction for and now you were almost thirty seven and a literal god was showing interest in you. A god. You wanted to scream because you knew he was unattainable, maybe he was just looking for a one night stand, of course he did. Guys weren't really looking to marry you at your age. At Least not men like him.

Strange had invited you here but he was missing from his own party so after a while you made your way upstairs to tell him that you were going back to the hotel as you felt tired, or maybe that was just another excuse to see Loki. Not it wasn't, you weren't that desperate for a man you had just met. You had never been that person. Right?

As soon as you reached the room you knocked on the door and took a deep breath, much to your delight Loki opened the door instead.

"If I didn't know you any better i'd have made an assumption that you came here for me" Your face flushed again as he said that, the smirk on his beautiful face was apparent.

"Well You don't know me Mister. Is Stephen here?"

He smiled and stepped away so you could get in the room but as you got in you noticed that Strange wasn't there

"He went away for a moment" Loki said to you so you sighed and turned around to look at him

"Umm okay..will you please tell him that I am tired and going back to the hotel? I'm staying at the Ritz"

"Sure would my lady, I'm sure he knew that already or perhaps the invitation is for me?" He asked you and you felt your face heating up again but instead of getting nervous you got bold instead, you didn't know where it came from..

"Maybe it is"

"What room?"

Lord, was he going to visit you?

"143"

He nodded his head as you said that and you walked past him to leave the room.

"Do you even know my name?" you suddenly turned around to ask him and he gave you a soft smile in response,

"It's y/n..isn't it?"

"He told you, didn't he?"

He didn't know why his eyes teared up at the question, he had been holding himself back from just wanting to grab you and kiss you at the moment.

"He did"

As soon as you were out of the room you took a deep breath, how come you had bumped into the sexiest man you had ever laid your eyes on? Not just that but he actually seemed interested in you. Things like that just didn't happen to you so it felt a little weird. What did he want from you? Perhaps a night of debauchery? That was your best guess, only half an hour later you heard a knock on the door so you opened it and found him on the other side,

You invited him in so he looked around before he diverted the attention back at you.

"Ummm you want something to drink? I have like ummm let me check" you walked towards the mini refrigerator to rummage through it "There's coke, some alcoholic beverages, I don't know if you consume that" He chuckled as you said that.

"Don't they charge heftly for that?" He asked you curiously.

"Well my ex is paying for the room so you know" he chuckled as you said that. Norns he had missed you and all your little quirks.

"I will have whatever this Coke is supposed to be" you smiled nervously as he said that. You grabbed a can from the mini freezer and passed it to him, you were shocked a little when he opened the can without even using his fingers,

"It's a charm" he said as he found you looking a bit starstruck.

"I see.. I mean I know..you're also magical and all" He smiled as you said that, he walked closer to you and your breath quickened as he continued to reach closer and closer to you with every step.

"Have a sip lady y/n" he pressed the can right over your lips and it made you gulp.

"It's okay…I ummm" you stuttered on your words and he couldn't help but enjoy the sight of you squirming like that. It boded well for his ego that he had such an affect on you even though you didn't even remember him just yet.

"I insist, it would be rude of me to not offer" you pressed your lips on the opening of the can and he raised it up a little so you could take a sip. After you were done with the sip, he brought the can back up to his own lips and drank from it, all while his eyes stayed glued to yours. He noticed the residue of the drink on the corner of your mouth and all he wanted to do was lick it off. His thoughts were filthy. It's been seven years, that was two thousand five hundred fifty five nights of him just touching himself to your memories .

"Uhhh so how was the meeting with Stephen?" You asked him to cut through the tension..

"Atrocious, he so badly needed my assistance but the arrogant arse took a while before he admitted it" you chuckled as he said that.

"Well you should have seen him years ago before ahhh the accident..he was way worse"

"Mmmhmmm?" He walked closer to you and placed the can down on the dresser behind you "Makes me wonder why a sweet woman like you would ever hitch herself to a man such as him" He whispered, his voice remained low and husky.

"Well I thought it was the right thing to do at the time" you looked down and he figured you couldn't even look in his eyes for longer than a few seconds.

"Is that so? Did it feel right?" He put his fingers on your chin and made you look up at him, every inch of your skin began to tingle with his touch. What was he doing to you and why?

"Not really..if the divorce wasn't enough of an indication for you then let me tell you that I do regret that decision everyday of my life"

He smiled as you said that. The forest green slip dress you had on made you look delectable, there were two heart shaped ribbons attached to the top of the straps that kept the dress hanging on your body, he found it really adorable. You let out a moan as his thumb brushed over your lower lip.

"Lokiiii" the sound of his whispered name made his cock harden in a jiff but he used the charm to keep himself from showing it, he didn't want you to think as if he was there for just a night of fun.

"Apologies little one, I got carried away" He took a step back and he noticed your heavy breathing. You weren't making this any easier, he remembered the dream he had about you two before where he lived the same scenario, he knew what you were going to say to him, it always started this way between you two, with friendship, a relationship that was built in such a way could have only lasted forever, there was no other way around it.

"It's okay I just… I am still dealing with the divorce and I just.. I don't know what you thought would happen tonight and I know I invited you here basically but I ..I'm just not ready for ..you know" your eyes teared up as you mumbled, that wasn't the reason why you didn't want to sleep with him, you didn't care about the divorce, you just didn't want him to think of you as someone he could have fun with for a night and leave, his own eyes softened as he noticed the anxious look on your face.

"Whatever it is that you desire from me tonight, I will give you that darling" he said firmly so you smiled before you chuckled slightly in disbelief.

"Really? So if I tell you that I barely have any friends and I want you to be my friend first, would you be my friend?" You asked him, he could sense the mockery in your tone, he didn't blame you, he knew his reputation wasn't the best especially because of how promiscuous his brother was on midgard he figured you must have put him through the same judgment, you didn't remember him after all.

"I would love to be your friend, I do not have any either"

Your eyes widened as he said that.

"Okay so ummm okay we can be friends i guess" he smiled as he grabbed your hand and placed a formal kiss on the back.

"My lady, I won't disappoint you i promise"

He kissed your forehead and as you looked up at him all of a sudden he just felt so familiar, as if you knew him in some other life, he felt like home and you couldn't really describe why.

That night as you both stayed up and talked you found yourself getting more and more attracted to him.

Days passed and turned into weeks but he never stepped out of line or asked you for things you never wanted to do, all your life you had felt a certain emptiness in your soul, even when you felt happy at times you found yourself thinking about the missing piece of your heart, you had always felt as if you were born with half a soul and for once in your life you were starting to believe that he was it. That he was the one you had been looking for, that he was the answer to all those questions. But he felt too good to be true.

How could someone be so precious as he was?

You had no idea how complicated your relationship was with him but you were going to find out the truth on your coming birthday..he was going to change your life forever, it would never be the same again.

And that is exactly what you had wished for all your life.

🥹💚🥹💚🥹💚🥹💚🥹💚🥹💚🥹

Taglist

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@cosniffee @lotsoflokilove23 @oreo-cream @aesonmae @salvinaa

#loki x female reader #loki #loki x reader fluff #loki x reader #loki x reader insert #loki x reader fic #loki x you #loki x reader angst #post Avengers loki

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little-tyrant-gortash · 3 months

Text

Oathbreaker

Pairing: fem!Tav x Enver Gortash, fem!Tav/Astarion

Tags: Emotional Manipulation, Manipulation, Manipulative Relationship, Paladin Tav (Baldur's Gate), Vaginal Sex, Penis In Vagina Sex, Drunk Sex, Unrequited Love, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Scars, Blood and Injury, Injury, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Pregnancy, Unplanned Pregnancy, Miscarriage, Torture, Psychological Torture, Implied/Referenced Torture

Word count: 2,221

Ao3 here.

Chapter 1.

Chapter 2.

Chapter 3.

Chapter 4.

Chapter 5.

Chapter 6.

Chapter 7.

Chapter 8.

Chapter 9.

Chapter 10.

Chapter 11.

Chapter 12.

Chapter 13.

Chapter 14.

Chapter 15.

Chapter 16.

Chapter 17.

Chapter 18.

Chapter 19.

Chapter 20.

Chapter 21.

Chapter 22.

Chapter 23.

Chapter 24.

Chapter 25.

Chapter 26.

Chapter 27.

Chapter 28.

Chapter 29.

Chapter 30.

Chapter 31.

Chapter 32.

Chapter 33.

Chapter 34. ⬇

Chapter 35.

Chapter 34: Closure

He was pleased to know that she was just there. That he could always check up on her – and she didn't disappear suddenly, this time. She'd told him she'd visit her camp when a few days have passed, but she always returned, and it finally made him a little calmer. Knowing she was surrounded by all his contraptions and soldiers, he could stop worrying about her safety. Frankly, he should've done this sooner.

In the past few days, she tried to keep herself to bland foods, and thanks to Gortash's carefully chosen meals and snacks, she could keep some of it actually down. As the days passed, she often found herself in his bed because of the nausea – their nest, as she called it by now –, surrounded with soft, fluffy pillows and blankets, good books, tea, and healthy snacks. He'd come and go between his meetings during the day; finding some peace in the fact that she'd been resting and she looked better now, that she could actually digest some of the food she ate. Although, he was aware that she still hadn't told him that she was with twins – if they truly could believe Astarion –, and he had to admit, that this fact, coupled with her sudden compliance and obedience to stay there were a little bit suspicious.

But, at the end of the day, when he joined her in the bed, after a quick wash up, and she snuggled up to him, sleepily mumbling nonsense, Enver found himself feeling content in the darkness again. Things were going according to his plans. He acted as Bane wanted him to; following the steps they had to keep themselves safe.

He was aware how fragile their shared future still was. One slip up, and it'd cost them greatly. Which was why he had made extra sure to keep her under close watch.

He could only suspect and not know: she'd been planning something. Again.

And this time, she knew she must be very, very careful, otherwise, he might kill her himself. Figuratively, of course.

The others, Lae'zel, in particular, urged her to get the Orphic Hammer from Raphael's House of Hope. This was a remarkable suicide mission, one Tav wasn't sure she wanted to risk. But then - thinking about how she'd be rendered useless for the upcoming year, maybe more, Tav had to admit that getting this mission done as soon as possible would be the best course of action. They had to release Orpheus from his prison. And they were so close.

The worst case scenario would be that they'd die in Raphael's home; but Gortash wouldn't know what happened to her, unless Raphael told him. It was very risky; straight insane, stealing from a devil's home, but they've been planning to get it done as soon as possible. The only problem was that they didn't know how and where to find a person who could open a portal directly in Raphael's House of Hope.

And the solution presented itself, in mere five days after she moved in Wyrm's Rock Fortress.

Gortash went back earlier to his – their – chambers that evening. He looked oddly melancholic, and much more tired than usual. He slipped out of his coat, hung it up, then walked over to Tav who sat in the bed, surrounded by the pillows, with a book in her lap. She closed it, as she always did, when she heard the door open. She smiled up at him at first; but the smile soon faded away when she saw the look on his face.

"What's wrong?" She asked as he walked over to the bed and sat down. Elbows on his thighs, he hid his face in his hands. "Enver", she whispered, placing the book beside herself, climbing over to him to snuggle to his side, like a cat. She gently rubbed his back. "What happened?"

"Could you come outside with me? I want to show you something."

Hearing how off his voice sounded, she instantly knew it was something serious.

"Of course I can", she murmured, resting her chin on his shoulder. "We can go whenever you're ready."

"Alright. Just. Let me gather myself."

"Of course."

Funny. He always dealt with every emotion he ever felt, alone. Lonely was all he knew. He was sure his parents didn't want him at all, and everything went worse after they've sold him. Only these days, in her presence, did he feel a deep level of understanding, of belonging; here, he felt wanted. Needed. Loved. And she never asked for anything in return. He'd spoiled her with dresses and jewellery but she was reluctant to accept them. He noticed that her eyes lit up so much more when he just walked in through the door than when he presented her yet another expensive gift.

It did not take him long to realise that she really just wanted him. Not the façade, not the wealth or the power, just him.

Why did she want a shattered heart? A boy who'd been broken to a billion pieces, then built up, based on his wrath he'd felt against the world?

Gortash gently moved at the thought; he wrapped an arm around her and held her close.

"You are my everything", he whispered.

Tav realised just now that he must've been in a strange mood that night. Usually, he was just exhausted from all the mental work he had to do during the day, but he always had the energy to ask and then listen to her as she described how her how her day went. Despite the fact not much happened to her like this, he was still interested in the books she'd been reading and the way she was thinking; he insisted on learning more about her, and, at the same time, he wanted to just listen to the sound of her voice.

"Alright", he sighed before she could answer, then let her go and smiled at her, but that smile never reached his eyes. "Let's go."

He held his hand out for her to take, and she cocked a brow at that.

"Oh my, oh my", she murmured as she slipped her hand into his, "what will the people think?"

"About what?"

"That we're holding hands." Tav intertwined her fingers with his, and she loved the feeling of his warm skin against hers. His skin was tougher than it looked; years of tinkering made his palms and fingers rough to the touch. But she loved them this way. "Outrageous. Scandalous."

Gortash looked confused for a mere second, before his eyes glinted with light again.

"I can see the next headline in Baldur's Mouth", Gortash finally smiled in full as he was guiding her out of the room, then down the halls, "Archduke Enver Gortash, caught, holding hands with Toril's most beautiful adventurer-"

"Oh no", Tav giggled, "all the ladies and gentlemen in the city will weep."

"Even married ones?"

"Especially married ones."

Gortash chuckled, then he kissed her temple as they walked.

"I can't believe that you're real sometimes", he muttered.

"Why? Because I'm perfect?" She teased, making him chuckle again.

"Because you can make me smile and laugh even when I'm at my lowest."

Uh oh.

"Did something happen?"

"No… I mean, a lot of things did, but…" He paused for a moment, trying to find the right words. "Nothing serious. I'm just not sure I can do… something alone. I… need you. With me."

Tav gently moved her other hand over his arm. If she could, she would've squeezed him there gently, but the golden gauntlet was unforgiving to her touch. Some parts of him remained unreachable to her. She hoped that his heart was an exception.

"You'll have me on your side for as long as you want me", she promised.

"Even if we shroud the world in darkness?"

Tav blinked. And for a moment, she'd seen a sun, rising over mountains. She focused her gaze again, then squeezed his fingers gently.

"Forever."

They continued their walk outside, then he led her to a small patch of land where a piece of stone laid in the grass. She realised a bit late that it was a tombstone. She read the name, but it didn't ring a bell.

"I had to bring him here. Give him a proper burial", Gortash whispered. "I couldn't leave him down there…"

Tav realised that this was the grave of the fallen Bhaalspawn. It felt like a firm hand twisted her heart in her chest. Looking at Gortash, she saw that his expression was completely unreadable. She wished she could say something - anything, to ease his pain. But she knew that it wouldn't be of use; not really.

"I wish you've met him under different circumstances", he continued, his brows slightly furrowed. "You're both very good at stirring up trouble."

"Oh?" She raised a brow.

"And killing everything that moves, too."

"Hah, we would've been fast friends, then", she agreed with a little smile.

"I never thought it'd be me who'd kill him", Gortash's voice broke, and her smile melted away in sympathy.

"I'm sorry you had to do it", she offered, "I wish there was another way… I wish we could've saved him…"

Gortash remained silent.

They've stayed outside for a long, long time. She didn't mind just being there with him in the silence, in the dark. She said nothing when he wrapped his arms around her waist and held her close, burying his face in her neck, sobs shaking his body as she was rubbing his back and stroked his head over and over again.

She gave him what he needed the most: silence, time and acceptance.

The stars were out by the time they went back to their nest. He uncorked a bottle of wine - she kept sipping her tea, of course, she didn't want to risk losing her dinner -, and as he was pouring glass after glass, he started to tell her stories of how he'd met the Bhaalspawn and how did they start to work together. She gave him her rapt attention; for one, she really was interested in his past and his relationship with the dragonborn, and she knew that it was important to him now, to talk about the past, in order to feel better. He'd told her story after story – especially because she was a good listener, and he felt entertained whenever she gasped in shock or asked a good question; and he kept talking until the wine was gone and he fell asleep in her arms.

The next morning, of course, he woke up with a headache. Her fingers were in his hair again, as she was watching the dawn rise on the other side of the window. She had been gently playing with his hair ever since she woke up; she'd been awake before even the sun started to stretch its arms across Baldur's Gate to caress her cheek and his head.

"Tav", he murmured in her neck.

"Hmm?"

"Thank you."

"You are most welcome, my dearest." She sighed softly as she ran her fingers in his ebony locks again. They were so soft against her palm. "How are you feeling?"

"Better. It'll take time to sink in, but you've helped a lot."

"I'm glad I did", she murmured, stroking the side of his face, now. He closed his eyes. They let silence settle between them for a while. But Tav had plans for that day, and she wanted to let him know. "I think I'll visit my friends again, today.

"Alright." He finally pulled away, then glanced down at her with a small smile. "But don't take too long. I become agitated when you're not here."

"No need to feel agitated, darling. I'll be with fierce warriors. Besides, I'm also a fierce warrior, remember?"

"Mm." Gortash pulled a bit away from her as he sat up, but he leaned back down to kiss her lower tummy. She blushed at the sensation of his warm breath and lips against her stomach, right where she nurtured the little ones with her body. "You don't need to be. I can be fierce for all of us, you know."

She ruffled his hair and he chuckled. Pulling away, he smiled at her, hair uncharactestically messy. Tav booped his nose.

"I believe you have places to be, handsome", she pointed it out.

"Mm-m. Indeed."

He kissed her forehead and pulled away with a groan. Quickly getting ready, Tav observed him, wondering how much he remembered from last night.

Once he left for the day, she got herself ready, too; donning the Reaper's Embrace and picking up the Blood of Lathander and the Knife of the Mountain King, too. In the camp, the others were eating breakfast, and cheered when they saw her. Tav had to smile at the sight of them; gods, did she miss her friends.

"I know how we'll get into the House of Hope", she whispered to the party when she sat down amoung them, "in the Devil's Fee, there's a diabolist called Helsik…"

Helsik, a character from Gortash's story from last night, who could indirectly help them steal the Orphic Hammer. Tav thanked the wine a thousand times; she was sure he wouldn't've told her nearly as much without it.

#Oathbreaker #little tyrant [enver gortash]#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg 3 #enver gortash #archduke enver gortash #lord enver gortash #fanfic #Oathbreaker fanfic

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louderfade · 4 months

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if you decorated your apartment/house/homespace to be beige/grey/off-white/basically a noncolor i automatically do not trust you. why are you afraid of colors. why do you want to live in a realty photograph or a hampton inn. i asked my sister why people do this (she's my go-to for explanations of normies bc she would've been one except she does drugs and was raised by me so got early immunity from full frontal lobe shut down) and she said "people find it calming" like wow really how strange. expressing zero personality/taste calms them down? that shit makes me feel like there could be a threat lurking near. it puts me on edge. it sets off alarms in my instinct center. i feel like a dog who senses an approaching animal has rabies. warning: some shit is deeply wrong with this organism and they pose a threat to your well being. flee without engaging. my grandparents are 90 and conservative and even they had a house with colors and patterns and art they enjoyed. millennial apartments terrify me. our boomer parents were hit or miss with their ticky-tacky suburban houses. some of those houses had a soul but many didn't. "hanging stuff on the walls decreases the property value" and other such statements that prove you're already dead. millennials seem worse though bc they do it to rentals bc they LIKE it. maybe those old women haircuts all the girls had in hs in the 2000s (this is my fav gen z criticism of us millennials bc so fucking true in hs i was like wtf are these middle aged hairstyles how did this become cool everyone looks 35) are responsible for this particular variety of brain damage. from now on i believe in this link. 32 year olds live in light grey horror boxes bc sporting 40 year old hairstyles at age 16 makes you permanently boring and unable to display any taste or personality. these are people who get uncomfortable looking at art or when a friend cries. these are the people who say "i'm sorry for your loss" to a grieving person instead of "life is cruel af my brother no answers come still we must try to survive do you need a fierce hug at this moment or not also i brought you a xanax" like a real human being would. the craziest thing i ever saw my mom do was pay to paint our foyer "eggshell" when the damn walls were already white. this is actual mental illness. not me screaming in the road about how the modern world makes no sense and all the food is microplastic poison. not a single child on earth says their favorite color is light grey or dark white. your soul is sick if beige calms you down. i diagnose you with a severe deficiency of humanity. you need to be hospitalized and forced to discuss philosophy and engage with music until you remember what is valuable about consciousness, which is beautiful as well as cruel, both a gift and curse but it's worth it. i'd rather be awake and have to go to the hospital sometimes when it becomes too much and i end up sobbing drunk in the yard than lobotomized to the point of trading my precious time on earth for money i then spend on beige curtains and a sign that says "caution: caffeinating" to hang in the kitchen proving i am a corpse whose bland heart forgot to stop beating. i mean they shoot horses don't they.

#my sister bought a 3000 dollar grey couch bc some people have way too much money #but she also asked me to make art for her bathrooms and guest bedroom which is human behavior #i made the art and all those rooms have bright colors but her living room is grey and ugly #she's a strange case: half boring popular girl but half formed by my influence bc we're eight years apart and super close #music is the most important thing to her proving she is sane and she does psychedelic drugs to keep her mind healthy #girls without sisters have a harder time i firmly believe this. i would've liked having a brother i think #but sisters help you improve your self-awareness and develop your gender identity/personal way of being female #it's prolly the same with boys and brothers but men are a mystery somebody else can try to solve #personal #text #important facts #live laugh lobotomy

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otakween · 6 months

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Cyborg 009 BGOOParts Delete (2020) - Volume 5

Finally done with this slog...well at least until it gets translated. I'll probably read this again in English if I ever get the chance because I feel like I missed a lot of what was happening.

Really didn't expect this entire series to just be the Mythos stuff, how lame. Why couldn't they just come up with new material? Oh well...

Ch. 29

Oh boy...more monologuing. It's a monologue off between Hera and Zeus and they just ramble on and on about the creation of the Mythos cyborgs. Zeus says he gave downtrodden, vulnerable people power and Hera's like "no bitch, you just enslaved them!" This whole manga series coulda been an email...

Helena does that weird "gay to be straight" thing at the end. As in, she kisses Francoise so she can kiss Joe indirectly. Okaaay...

Ch. 30

The numbers cyborgs take down the Atlas-type robots Zeus summoned using ~the power of teamwork~

Joe helps Apollon get out of the line of attack and Apollon has one of those "why are you helping me? We're enemies!" Cliche moments. I feel like we've gone through this about a zillion times now.

Ch. 31

I think this artist is horny for Artemis based on the sultry way she's drawn over and over. Also, they may or may not ship Joe x Apollon because there are a lot of tender moments between them. With how pretty they're drawn, it feels like fujoshi bait. (Maybe I'd ship them if they weren't bland, flat characters lol)

Apollon helps Joe take down the Atlas-type robots, Zeus talks about the benefits of robots vs. cyborgs (they don't betray you and aren't emotional) and then Apollon gets obliterated and the Atlas-type robots start attacking each other (because their ability to recognize allies began to malfunction).

Ch. 32

With all other enemies taken out, Zeus turns into his ~final form~ and starts zappin'. Helena gets caught in the crosshairs and the number cyborgs plan their revenge.

I'm kinda confused about Hera's role in all this. She's been judging him this whole time but also not exactly working against him...? I guess she's too weak to do that.

Ch. 33

Okay, so maybe that wasn't his final form lol. More battle nonsense happens and Joe manages to shoot Zeus in the head with his own laser, but then he transforms into Apollon

It really feels like the writer couldn't really think of anything to do with this story, so they just draaaaged out the battle as long as they could. Also, the dialogue continues to be hella repetitive. If I hear Hera/Zeus say "the Mythos cyborgs whose fate is under your control" one more time I'mma snap.

Ch. 34

Zeus monologues some more, transforms into an abomination and then Joe one-shots him with help from Hera's amulet lol. Pretty anti-climactic but I'm glad that's over with.

Prof. Gilmore randomly showed up to be like "I'm worried about Ivan." Thanks for your input, Gilmore.

We get one final Hera monologue and then she puts Prof. Gaia's soul back in his original body so that they can die together I guess.

It's revealed that Prof. Uranus' first name was Tyrone...did they just google "black guy name" for that one? That doesn't seem like a fitting name for his age/time period, but what do I know I guess...

Ch. 35

This chapter was the epilogue and it got all weird and existential. They talked about fighting alternate versions of themselves in other universes and about their minds fusing together to become one being (??). They also referenced an "angel of despair" a few times which reminded me of the angel from 009 Re:Cyborg. This all seemingly came out of nowhere...

Francoise kisses Joe to "pass on Helena's message." She tells everyone to close their eyes, but Ivan tries to sneak a peek. I feel like that was the one cute moment in this entire series lol

For the human characters everything's back to normal and their memories were wiped. The implication is that the numbers cyborgs will keep on keepin' on in the multiverse. Guess this franchise will never die lol.

Obviously, I didn't really enjoy myself reading BGOO Parts, but I'm happy for the real fans out there that they have some new content to chew on. As I said in my previous posts, the art was very nice, but the writing/pacing/story all kinda stunk. Not a lot of interesting character moments either. Onto the next!

#Cyborg 009 BGOOParts Delete #cyborg 009 #manga

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faegoddessog · 10 months

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Seventy Two Hours of Bliss Ch. 35/41

Chapter 35: The Road Ahead

Chapter Warnings: Explicitly mature content, 18+ only, Fingering, unprotected PiV, (play safe ya'll) mention of past self harm (There is help for self-harm, Text CONNECT to 741741 ), angst, possessive sex,

Series Masterlist

Series Summary:

You are neighbors with Austin Butler on the Gold Coast of Australia just prior to shooting Elvis. You become just friends because he is taken. However, after he is single again, you both find out just how attracted you are to one another and things get unrelentingly hot.

SERIES WARNING: Explicitly mature content, 18+ only, here there be lemons.

Authors Notes: I started writing this while remodeling my kitchen, so that informed the slightly quirky narrative. It starts slow, but once it heats up, it is on fire. I have tried to pull facts from RL as much as I could, but obviously there are some assumptions and flat out dreamy wishes involved here.

Chapter 35: The Road Ahead

Late one night in the beginning of July, you are lying in bed unable to sleep. Austin is conked out next to you, he looks like an angel, breathing softly in the light of your phone. You habitually pull up your email. The top email is from the US Antarctic program. You are suddenly terrified to open it. You toss your phone to the foot of the bed like it’s on fire.

Shit, it’s here. The thing you have been dreaming of and yet dreading in the back of your mind is actually here. One long held, life-affirming dream potentially lying in wait at the foot of the bed, another fresh, new, love-affirming dream lying next to you. What if you have to choose between them? You aren't ready to confront a choice like this.

What if Antarctica doesn't want you and you never end up going. One dream crushed. The other is still here, asleep next to you.

But what if they do want you. You HAVE to go. This, plus renovating Tom and Rita’s in Greece, will complete your 7 continents. You wouldn't forgive yourself if you give up on your ‘every continent’ goal. It's the one thing that kept you going after facing death, after being broken mind, body, heart and soul. You just can’t, not for anyone, not even for Austin. But if you go, what will happen between you? Will he still want you, will you still want him? What if absence makes the heart grow forgetful instead of fonder. You push those thoughts away viciously, your heart rate increasing.

Oh my god, you don't know how to feel right now, strong opposing emotions stretch your capacity to think rationally. You swirl perilously close to that blank place of apathy. Thought patterns and emotions you thought you had dealt with, re-surfacing after so many years. The place you fell into when he left while you were still in your hospital bed. That place you went when you were torn apart physically, mentally and that fucker left your heart and self esteem in tatters. The place of neutral feelings, everything gray and bland. The place where bright streaks of red welling up on your arms weren't cause for alarm, just a way of feeling something, anything. The place where living and dying were all the same.

'Fuck no you don't!' She screams inside your head, color and knife edge emotions brought back into sharp focus, 'We are NOT doing that again! Austin isn't him. He would never do that to you!'

You roll over and huddle into the angel's chest, hiding from what may be on your phone. Your breath is shallow and shaky. FUCK! Why can’t you just stay in the now. The literal right now, in your little Austin bubble where he is yours (and Elvis’) all day, every day. What if all this between you is just because it’s convenient? What if absence makes him simply forget you exist? What if someone else, swoops in and takes him away from you while you are gone? You try in vain to take in big, long breaths, attempting to shove those dangerous thoughts out of your head.

'Shut the fuck up bullshit inadequacy!" She is so much more than just a sex-driven demon.

You start trembling, clinging to him, hoping it’ll stop before he wakes up. Damnit, you know better than to get yourself worked up. Fucking anxiety attack.

‘When the hell did you become THIS girl?’ you ask yourself, ‘Antarctica is your dream!"

‘When you fucking fell in love with that sexy boy right there,” she states, "when you let yourself finally become vulnerable to someone else."

Woken by your movement and the breath across his skin, Austin folds you in his arms.

This only manages to make you shake more. Knowing you aren't actually alone here is like permission to let all that has been running around your head leak out.

“Hey, Kitten,” his voice gravelly with sleep.” hey, what’s wrong? I’m here baby, it’s ok. Shhhh,”

His immediate concern shifts your anxiety into tears. Damnit.

“Wanna talk about it, Kitten?” he asks, concerned and rubbing your back, ”was it a bad dream.”

“No baby,” you sob, “it’s this dream…It’s too good…..what if it doesn’t ….” you whimper into his chest, tears wetting his skin.

“What are you talking about, sweetheart?” he pets your hair soothingly.

“What if you forget …And someone else,” you are practically hyperventilating and unable to finish your sentences through your sobs, ”So in love ... how can I … will you want...... how can I face mys- … fuck… why am I so… fuck!" tears stream down your face.

“Shhhh, Kitten, darling,” he doesn't try to understand, he just holds you close, kissing your forehead, “I love you baby, just breathe.”

Gradually you get your breathing under control and your heart beat slows as the anxiety runs it's course. He sits up, leaning against the headboard, taking you with him. He turns on the bedside lamp, hands you the bottle of water he keeps there and a tissue.

You blow your nose, feeling a little foolish, and sip the water.

“Are you ready to tell me what is going on?” he asks as you hand the bottle back to him.

"I'm so sorry baby, fucking anxiety," head hanging and your hand covering your face, feeling a little ashamed.

"Whoa, sweetie," he gently removes your hand and holds it in his rubbing his thumb along the back. He tips your chin up to look at him, "there is nothing to be sorry for. I am here for you my love, no matter what."

His loving gaze melts you. You take a deep breath, then another. You nod and reach for your phone.

“I haven’t read it yet to see what it says, but I got an email from the Antarctica people and um… all my anxiety just exploded.”

“Why anxiety hunny? I thought that would be exciting for you,” he frowns a little, "it's what you've been waiting for."

“Well, what if they said no, there goes my dream of all 7 continents, but what if they said yes… and I... I leave,” your voice gets shaky again and words tumble out as if they will never be said unless you say them quickly. “What if you forget all about me and I never see you again. And why the fuck am I being so insecure? But how can I not go, it’s my dream and yes, so exciting and I don’t want to lose you, but… I mean I would never ask or expect you to give up your career and dreams to follow me around the world carrying boxes...“

Austin places one hand on your cheek, arresting your freight train of thought. “Oh baby, we knew this was coming, and yeah it's a daunting now that it's here, but I would never ask you to give up on those dreams for any reason. It’s another one of those things that makes me love you," his other hand frames your face, his eyes boring into yours, "Did you hear that? I. Love. You. Forgetting you is simply not possible. Do you think I hand out custom butt plugs to everyone I’ve dated? No. You are so unique and such an amazing human. And no, I wouldn’t give up my dreams, but I would follow you anywhere and carry anything for you. So instead of what-if-ing, let's see what they actually said,” his deep voice has a calming effect on your nerves.

You open the phone, then shove it over to him, “You read it, I’m too nervous.”

He nods, licking his lips. He is nervous too. He scans the email.

“They want you baby,” he smiles up at you.

“What?!” you snatch the phone from him. The email says you are the primary applicant for the Antarctica position you interviewed for last February. They want you on the winfly to prep the station for the austral summer influx. Your contract would run until February with an option for longer should you choose. Because of quarantine procedures and mandatory training you will have to leave in two weeks. They want an answer in 48 hours.

“Oh fuck, two weeks, I thought I’d have longer than that.” You look up at him with tears threatening. You don’t even know how to feel; elated? sad? scared? “Should I tell them yes?” you ask, all nerves.

“Um, you had better! You would never forgive yourself or me if you didn’t,” he knows you so well.

“Fuck, you are right. I would end up so pissed if I told them no," you realize that saying no for him would drive an inevitable wedge between you, "I guess I’m going to Antarctica!” the excitement starts to seep into the cracks left behind by the anxiety.

“I’m so excited for you! You are gonna crush it!” he grabs your face and plants a kiss on your lips, then pulls you close for a hug.

“I’m going to miss you so much though babe,” you say into his chest.

“Kitten, it’s not even a year, we can handle that. Besides, in this day and age, it’s nothing. I’ll call you all the time,” he tries to reassure you.

You pull away from him, forehead crinkled and look him dead in the eye.

“Oh, Austin, there is no cell service there. They barely have internet. That’s why I’m scared you’ll …. “ you let your sentence fade off. It’s stupid, the idea he’ll forget you, but the fear of losing him is bigger than you ever wanted it to be. This is why you have not gotten involved with anyone for so long. Fear of losing... again.

“Ok then, we will do it old school and I’ll write you letters,” he smiles, undeterred, “and if they don’t have mail I’ll use a carrier penguin.”

This makes you crack a smile.

“Kitten, something you may not have realized about me, when I fall in love, I do it hard. And nothing and no one is going to change how I feel about you,” his hands are cradling your face, thumbs wiping away stray tears, “got it baby?”

You just nod, holding his hand to your cheek.

He kisses you lovingly and sweetly, then deeper more passionate but still tender. He pushes you onto your back, rolling on top of you. His weight comforting as his tongue gently explores your mouth. He kisses you until all the anxiety is washed away, replaced with pure undiluted Austin.

“Do you want me, Kitten?” he whispers, pressing his stiff cock against your thigh, ”can I make love to you?”

“Please yes,” you whisper back, legs spreading to make room for his hips. His mouth is on your neck, kissing and gently sucking as his hardness finds its way inside you, filling you. It feels so blissfully good. He moves in you in this sweet, gentle way. He is unhurried. Each instroke is strangely soothing to your soul. Things have been so surreal in the world, but this, this moment, is as real as it gets.

In the morning, you get an appointment with your therapist. You hadn’t needed a session in a while. She is, luckily, available because of the time difference. You give her the rundown of the situation and how those self-destructive thoughts surfaced again.

She talks about how something so traumatic never really leaves you, and it’s normal that they arise from time to time, triggered by similar strong emotions. You talk about Austin, about how deeply in love you are with him, how you are afraid of losing him, all the things he did and said when you were having your breakdown.

“You have come so far from the girl who first told me she would rather die than fall in love again. He sounds like a good one. Have you told him about what happened?” She asks.

“Not exactly, he knows I was in an accident, he knows I was engaged. But not the whole story, it’s just not come up,” you say.

“You should tell him, give him some context for your fears,” she suggests.

You nod, she has a point.

After you end the session, you and Austin facetime to your Uncle Roy. He agrees to let Austin stay in the apartment rent free.

“I like that there is someone there during the pandemic” Uncle Roy says, “plus Austin is like family now.” Just as he says that, Marissa walks in.

“Daddy, can I borrow the…” she looks at the screen, “Why are you watching an interview with Austin Butler?”

Oh shit.

You whisper, ‘Marissa’ to Austin. He raises his eyebrows as if to say, ‘you ready for this?’

Well, here goes nothing!

“Hey Mar!” you pop your head into view.

“It’s your cousin and her boyfriend in the Aussie apartment, Mari Bear,” your uncle has no idea that the cat is out of the bag. He doesn’t even know there is a cat OR a bag.

Marissa just stares at the screen, mouth agape as Austin puts his arm around you so you can both fit into the phone screen.

“Wait, YOU’RE THE FRENCH WOMAN?! How the hell!!” She squeals, grabbing her phone.

“Put the phone DOWN Mari!” you say threateningly. Mari freezes. “Uncle Roy, thank you so much for being so cool about this, I need to talk with Mari girl to girl for a second.”

“You two and all your girl talk, since you were kids,” he waves his hand, shrugs and steps out of the room. You step away from Austin.

“Listen Mar,” you voice lowered conspiratorially, “we are not ready to go public with this so if you or anyone you know or that follows you even so much as hint that you know the identity of the ‘French woman’, anywhere online and I will 1. Never you let you meet Austin in person and 2. I will tell EVERYONE about what happened at the lake and I mean everyone.”

“You wouldn’t dare!” Mar gasps, looking around to make sure her dad isn’t near.

“Like hell I wouldn’t. That is how important this is to me, and yes, I still have the negatives,” you remind her.

“Okay, Okay! Well when you are out, can I have a big reveal for my channel?” She asks, trying to bargain.

“How about this, if you keep fucking quiet, we will set you up with his publicist and we will work something out.” you say, walking back to Austin, giving him a thumbs up.

“Holy fuck, I’m freaking out right now!” Mari exclaims as you lean up against Austin.

He gives her a little finger-tip wave.

“Hey Marissa, nice to meet you. Thanks for keeping this on the DL, for us. We really appreciate it,” he says in his interview voice, giving her a winning smile.

“Oh, of course Mr. Butler,” she is all flustered.

“It’s just Austin, but thank you,” he nods his head.

Once you get off the phone, you glance at Austin.

“You handled that well, what did you say to keep her quiet?” giving you a side eye.

“Well, I’ve been handling Mar our whole lives. I love her cuz she’s family, but she has trouble with boundaries. I have dirt on her that she doesn’t want out. And um… I told her we’d hook her channel up with your publicist when, and if, we are ready.”

“Hmm, alright, I’m not sure how she will feel about that, but we can talk,” he says.

“Yeah, oh fuck, I didn’t think, will your publicist follow her socials? I won’t be able to with no internet,” you ask.

I will call her later and we will talk about it,” he smiles at you.

For the next two weeks, any time not spent filling out forms and packing things either for storage or Antarctica is spent with Austin. He still studies Elvis every day, not wanting to lose his momentum. You try to find the right time to tell him more about what happened with your ex, but it never seems right. You cook together, watch some of your favorite movies, you take moonlight walks on the beach and the sex… oh my god the sex.

You have been trying out your hand at mixed drinks for the past several nights. Tonight is gin night. You have about a week until you leave. You are both on your way to being tipsy, having tried a Tom Collins then Negronis. You had just made two shaken gin martinis and clinked them together, feeling super fancy.

“I have a prezzie-prize for you babe,” you say, feeling goofy. You reach into your bag and pull out a post mailer. “I had the mail wrap it for you.” You giggle at your own joke and hand it to him.

“OH! A present! For me!!” he exclaims, being silly himself.

He tears open the package. It’s two pairs of Meundies boxer briefs. The first one has martini glasses with the words ‘extra dirty’ on them. Two little olives are cuddling in the glasses with a little heart over their heads. Yeah, you might’ve timed this with your drinks on purpose. He looks at the second pair and then at you.

“You didn’t” he says. You just nod with a huge grin on your face They are light blue and covered in unicorns with rainbow manes and tails, just like your favorite panties. He just laughs and hugs you to him. “I love them hunny."

He insists that you two go up to the rooftop with your drinks.

You grab blankets and toss your drinks into to-go cups with lids. There are no lights up there, just the ambient light of the city. He stands there looking out over the ocean, sipping his drink. You slip under his arm. It’s a little chilly, maybe 15C, the breeze from the ocean making it feel a little colder.

“I know I’m a little drunk, but I want the world to know that I love you, Kitten.” He kisses you softly, then holds his drink up and yells at the top of his lungs “I, Austin Butler, love this woman right here!”

A distant ‘good for you! Now shut up!’ bounces off the buildings.

You giggle as he sits on one of the lounge chairs, laughing. He draws you down on his lap, straddling him.

“I love you too, so much it kinda hurts,” you admit.

“Hurts? No, no baby,” he shakes his head, putting his drink down, ”I don’t want you to hurt, only feel good. Here let me kiss it and make it better.” He leans forward filling both his hands with your breasts and plants a kiss in the middle of your chest, on your heart.

Your fingers play in his hair as you lean down and breathe deep the scent of him in the cool night air. Filing it away in your memory as best you can.

“All your kisses make me better, darlin’,” you mutter, kissing the top of his head, feeling the gin seep into your brain.

He takes your cup and sets it down next to his. You wrap the blankets you brought around you both. He cradles your jaw and your lips meet. You moan against his closed mouth, inhibitions evaporating. You are both just a little clumsy from the alcohol, but the ‘whiskey kisses’ are divine.

“You are so hot Kitten. I had a dream the other day that I fucked you up here,” he murmurs against your lips, hand rubbing against your clothed crotch.

“You dream about me?” you had no idea.

“Oh yeah, all the time. Why do you think I wake you up with my cock so often. Damn, I’m gon’ miss that,” he presses his face to your breasts.

“Tell me your dream, baby,” you cradle his head against you.

“I was young Elvis,” he leans back looking into your neckr eyes, “and you were an adoring fan, sittin’ on my lap just like this, arms around me, only you had on a little skirt with nothing on under. The sun was sinking and you glowed as I slipped into you. And now I’m gonna slide into you right here,” he says, “make you a puddle in my lap.” His hands undo your bra under your shirt with only two tries. His lips and teeth are against you.

Your insides clench tight, juices starting to flow.

“I would be disappointed if you didn’t,” you say, rocking back and forth onto his swelling bulge. His hands slide into the waistband of your pants. You try to get your pants off of one leg. In your haste and clumsiness, you end up falling off his lap onto the grass, taking the blankets with you. You both start laughing.

He helps you up and you wiggle out of your pants. You straddle him again, re-settling the blankets around you both. His hand slips up your shirt to palm your breast in circles, watching your brow furrow in desire and your teeth capture your bottom lip. He gives you a naughty little grin and lifts your shirt over your tits. Gathering your breasts together with both hands, he licks your nipples. The cold air makes the flesh pucker. He pulls one into his mouth sucking hard, making you drop your head back and moan. Your hands curl up into his long hair, grasping him to you. His tongue is like fire licking your belly.

Your hands push between your bodies, unfastening his fly and reaching to pull him out. He helps, his big cock already stiff and upright.

“Do you see what you do to me, my beautiful Enchantress?” he motions to his cock, “Even tipsy as I am, I’m hard as hell for you.”

“What I do? Feel what you do to me,” you lift up to give him space to reach between your legs. “My god Austin, just the mention of putting that gorgeous cock in me, made my cunt drip in anticipation. I want you so desperately.”

He slips his dexterous digits between your folds.

“Oh fuck baby, you are one horny minx aren’t you,” the corners of his beautiful mouth curl up and his demon gazes up at you. He begins to curl his fingers, finding the spongy, rough section on your front wall.

You are shaking, not from cold, but from eagerness. You love him inside you; want him like this always; always inside you somehow; always wanting you. Your juices run in a runnel down his fingers and into his palm. Low moans flow from you.

“Oh my god,” you cry out, louder than you meant to.

“Now, now Kitten, Are you gonna be quiet for me?” he asks.

“No,” your tipsy self answers honestly with a little giggle.

"Well that guy," he points over his shoulder, "might yell at you."

"Fuck that guy," you shrug.

"No thanks, I'd rather fuck you." He pulls you into a passionate kiss. You grind your pussy into his hand.

Suddenly you are both overcome with desire.

“Get that cock in me,” your tone demanding against his lips.

He nods, holding himself by the base as you lift up. He positions himself at your opening and you grind down onto him in circles. Your moans mingle in your kiss.

The little pocket between you where his cock had been lying in wait, was chilly, despite all the blankets wrapped around you two. He feels cool inside you, so you can only imagine how warm you must feel to him.

“Oh yes,” he moans, the alcohol hindering his usual verbal restraint, ”take all that cock like a good girl.”

He feels so good inside you.

“Aw, I like being naughty though,” you retort, smiling at him and sliding up and back down onto him, wetness covering his cock.

“Who’s naughty Kitten are you then?” he asks, his voice deep.

“Well, let me see…” you joke, continuing to ride him.

He tightens his grip on your hips, stopping your movement.

“Who’s are you?” his eyes are suddenly serious and piercing. The tipsiness slows your brain just enough that you don’t see the insecurity in his face until he thrusts hard and deep into you, bringing your senses into sharp focus.

“Oh fuck,” is all you can say.

“Who’s dirty girl are you?” he asks, louder, thrusting again.

“I’m yours, baby,” looking into his eyes and finally seeing his seriousness.

“Who owns this dripping, hot, wet, pussy?” each descriptor punctuated by a hard thrust into you.

“Oh Fuck, you do!” it would hurt if you weren’t so fucking turned on.

“Who does?” he asks

“You do Austin. It’s your pussy.”

“That’s right,” his voice is raspy, as he pulls your hair out of your face, “You are MY naughty little Kitten. My dirty girl. All Mine!”

“All yours baby,“ you say, rocking him in and out of you, “All yours to finger, to suck and lick, all yours to pound, yours to play with.”

You press yourself close to his chest, pulling blankets up and around you both again. “Please, please don’t stop fucking me.”

“Never,” he says through clenched teeth.

His hands grips your legs, his hips raising and lowering his cock in and out of you. Your hand is braced behind his neck, forehead to forehead. He is steadily fucking you.

“Oh god, I love it, I love that,” you moan in his ear, unable to stop words spilling out your mouth.

Your knees are sliding wider and wider apart, wanting him deep, wanting him to slam into your clit with each thrust.

“Your pussy, your pussy, your pussy”, flows out your mouth.

You are so close to the breech, mouth open. He can tell you are close so he quickens his pace. Your top teeth sink into the fleshy part of his shoulder, pussy clenching down.

“Oh Kitten, my dirty girl, I love fucking you,” his voice husky and low. His hips jerking roughly into you.

“Oh god, yeeeeessss,” you scream, arching back, his words triggering pelvic spasms around the stiff rod he is torturing you with. A closed-mouth high-pitched wail sounds out your nose as you gyrate on his cock through an orgasm.

Even if you wanted to, you can’t stop your hips from moving, jerking, grinding onto him.

“You’re so fucking perfect baby, cumming on my cock like that. God damn,” even through your orgasm you recognize the deep desire in his voice.

He lifts you off of him.

“Nononono don’t stop” you whine.

“Never, baby,” he slides his legs to either side as he pushes you back to lie on the foot of the lounge, the blankets behind you. You don’t even feel the cold. Your legs are up by his shoulders, throbbing pussy exposed and open to him.

“Do you want my cum?” he asks, his voice harsh with desire, his fingers flicking across your clit.

“Yes, yes, yes,” is your breathy reply,

“Say it, Kitten. Do you want my cum?” he asks again, placing the tip of his glorious self at your opening.

“Fuck yes I want your cum Austin, please, I need your cock in me, fuck me please” you beg, your filter totally gone. “Please give me all your cum right here,” you tap out little slaps on your pussy.

With you so lascivious under him, so lustful with need, he can’t hold back. With a groan, he immerses himself in you. Immediately charging towards his own orgasm with fervor, hands on your shoulders, pulling you towards him.

“Oh God, fuck, you make me cum so good! You make me cum so good! You make me cum so good!” your strings of words getting higher in pitch, on the brink of cumming against his onslaught. His hands slide to either side of your head. Forcing you to look at him.

“Who’s pussy’s gonna cum?” he says through gritted teeth. His head is still, but his hips are pitching into you with such force, only his hands on your head keep the vision of him from being a total blur.

“Your pussy, baby, yours. You fuck your pussy so good, so good, so good, so fucking good.” Like a deluge of water dropping on you all at once, another orgasm slams into you, making you writhe under him, teeth imprinting onto his hand to muzzle the sound of your screaming.

“That’s my girl. Cream that cock, dirty girl, fuck you feel so good,” he moans. Crest after crest of your orgasm seizes his cock, bringing him closer to baptizing you in his cum.

“Who’s dirty girl are you?” he urges, wanting to possess you.

“I’m your d-d-d-d-dirty girl, I’m your dirty girl,” you stutter and moan out as you ride the wave of shivering pleasure. “Give me your cum. I want it, I want it in me!”

“It’s yours baby, it’s your cum, only for you Kitten,” he is pounding you hard, fast, head tucked down into your neck and shoulder. "Oh Fuuuuuck, yessss!” hisses out of him as he pushes deep and fills your pussy. “Oh Gawawawad!” his whole body seizes on top of you.

Your arms and legs clutch him to you. You are overwhelmed with emotion, everything you’ve been holding back about leaving welling up with your enormous orgasm.

He sits back in the lounge chair and pulls you and the blankets against him. You don’t realize it at the time, but his deep shaky breaths are hiding his own emotional overwhelm.

After a while, how long you can’t say as time feels fake, you are curled up against Austin half naked, both of you calmer and somewhat less drunk.

“Are you awake Kitten?” he ventures quietly and a bit nervously.

“Yeah,” you answer, sensing something is off, “you ok?”

“I, uh, I need to say something and um… I don’t want you to take it wrong,” he begins.

You sit up in his lap to look him in the face, suddenly terrified of what he is going to say.

“If you are breaking up with me…” your mind falls to the worst thing you can think of at that moment.

“What? NO! No, no!” he interrupts you, a look of horror on his face as he grips your outstretched hands.

“Jesus,” your eyes close and you breathe a sigh, “what is wrong with me?” you mutter to yourself. You know what is wrong, it's time to tell him.

“Oh babe,” he cups your check, “there is nothing wrong with you or with us. I just need to…” He hesitates.” Ok, there is a part of me that is so excited for you to live your dream. But there is also a chunk of me that doesn’t want you to go,” his forehead creases and furrows as he admits this to you. “And to be clear, I’m not asking you to give it up, I just need to be honest and present with my feelings. I know it’s a scary pandemic world right now, but I wouldn’t trade this time with you for anything. I’ve fallen so hard for you, I don’t know how I’m gonna do this without you. And what if you meet someone else? I know it’s stupid but you’ll be down there so far away and I can’t call. That's why the possessive stuff during... “ he bites his lip. ”What if… I have this weird fear that what if what we are feeling for each other doesn't translate to being apart? What if we can’t do this?"

You reach up, smoothing his forehead with your thumb. You hadn't realize he was feeling insecure too.

“Same baby,” you say simply, “on all accounts. I am excited AND I don’t want to leave. I’m also terrified that you will find someone else in the months that I am gone, I mean you are a sexy heartthrob of a man in the public eye, women and men must fall at your feet. I’m not sure how I’m going to cope without you either. I’m just hoping that we will both be so busy we won’t have time to dwell on it. And, I like being your dirty girl." you smile.

"Listen Baby, I need to tell you this, just so you have some context," you take a deep breath and forge ahead, "Do you remember I told you about the guy I used to flip houses with,” Austin nods, his face intent with listening. “Well, we were engaged when I had my accident and when he found out that I couldn't have kids, he came to the hospital the next day and broke it off. He said he didn’t want to drag it out, but that kids were the priority for him and he didn't want to waste any time finding the real mother of his children."

Austin looks appalled by this. You just nod.

"I was crushed, I was nothing but a baby factory in his eyes. By the time I was out of the hospital, he had moved out of our apartment, divided our holdings in half and left with no forwarding address or number. IHis family wouldn't take my calls. I didn’t get the chance to have any closure. I slipped into a deep depression, feeling no self worth. I started cutting myself just to feel something, anything. "

"Oh baby," Austin strokes your hands, empathy and concern on his face.

" Yeah, it was bad. I had a lot of therapy and meds. I slowly realized the gift of getting away from him, he would have never loved me for me. The continent thing was born when I started my own remodeling business, initially as a way to get away from that past. It grew into a passion. This dream has healed me in so many ways. I became an independent, curious, educated citizen of the world again. It allowed me to meet you. I didn't think I’d ever let anyone this close to me again, but with you it was so damn easy I didn’t have to think twice.

“So yeah, I am afraid of losing you and I’m sorry I let my insecurity jump to conclusions. Will our relationship stand being apart? Babe, there is only one way to find out and it’s walking towards our fears.”

He nods again. You take another breath, and grab both his hands.

“I do know this: I’ve been ‘around’,” you admit, “ I’ve dated a fair number of people, and, honestly I’ve slept with a fair few more. Not one of them holds a candle to you, to how you make me feel, the things you do to me. I have never before found what we have right here,” you move your clasped hands up to each of your hearts. “I had given up on trying to find someone, until you. I am in awe of you Austin Butler and it blows me away that you consent to be with me.”

“Consent? Kitten, I WANT to be with you. Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me all that, especially the cutting, that can be hard to share. I see why you responded the way you did, it makes a lot of sense. You have been through so much, seen so much of the world and have done it with grace and kindness and strength. You are amazing and brave and so fucking sexy. I will state for the record that I don’t care if you can’t have kids. I want YOU, just as you are. You bring parts of me out that I didn’t know I had and I can’t keep my hands off you. I’m not going to deny the ego boost of getting that kind of attention from the public but at the end of the day it’s not fulfilling. It’s not THIS, “ he grips your hands back, “I am astonished that YOU are willing to be with ME, and I just want to be enough for you.”

“We are a pair, aren’t we,” you chuckle, shaking your head, “here we are worried about the same things, and each of us feeling insecure about not being good enough for the other, yet so over the moon about one another.”

“Well when you put it that way….yeah, “ he smiles, “I think we need to tell our insecurities to shut the fuck up and agree that we are more than enough. See through love’s eyes, instead of fear’s.”

“One hundred percent agree,” you smile at him, “and however we end up communicating over the next 7 months, let’s just be as honest as we can with each other. I mean if we decide it isn’t working, I’d rather not be delusional.”

“I don’t like to think about that, but I’d much rather be honest, so yeah,” he nods his head.

“And,” you put your forehead to his, “I will make this promise to you: once Antarctica is over and I finish Tom and Rita’s, if you still want me, I will follow you to the ends of the earth.”

“Take out the insecure ‘if you still want me’ part and it’s a deal,” he smiles at you.

“OK,” you breathe, starting over, “once Antarctica is over and I finish in Greece, I promise I will follow you to the ends of the earth.”

“Not unless I follow you first babe,” he pulls you into a sweet kiss, hand on your chin.

#Austin Butler #Austin Butler smut #Austin Butler x reader #Austin Butler fic #Austin butler fanfic #@purejasmine #@slowsweetlove #@richardslady121

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honourablejester · 3 months

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Call of Cthulhu Character Concept: 1920s Funeral Home Dreamer

Because I just really wanted to try making a CoC investigator. I’m not sure what I intended to make initially, but browsing the occupations list gave me ‘undertaker’, and then I decided to roll for characteristics initially (I later added points on so the total would equal 460, as if for point buy), and that gave me a starting Appearance of 20, which is just above ‘ugly, possibly disfigured due to injury or at birth’, which gave me a bit of a starting seed. Then I was browsing the period names suggestion list, and saw ‘Asenath’, which I’d never heard before, and looked that up. And it’s a biblical name, but an Egyptian figure, so the name means ‘dedicated to the goddess Neith’. Which, in a Cthulhu setting, was … interesting.

So. Asenath Webber, a 34 year old assistant at her family’s funeral home in Arkham, Massachusetts, who has a troubled relationship with her brother since he permanently scarred her with embalming chemicals in an ‘accident’ as kids, and whose beloved uncle helped foster her education and interest in literature, history, and just a bit of the occult. Heh.

Call of Cthulhu Character Concept: Asenath Webber

Name: Asenath Webber

Occupation: Embalmer’s Assistant/Hearse Driver (Undertaker)

Age: 34

Gender: Female

Birthplace/Place of Residence: Arkham, Massachusetts.

Characteristics:

Strength 50, Constitution 80, Dexterity 60, Intelligence 50, Size 50, Power 70, Appearance 20, Education 80

(I initially rolled, then brought them up to total 460 as if for point buy (my original rolled total was 435), but the initial rolls are why her appearance is in the toilet. I could have brought that up, but I figured let’s roll with it)

Hit Points: 13

Magic Points: 14

Luck: 55

Sanity: 65

Move: 8

Skills Above Base:

Brawl 35%, Drive Auto 60%, Dodge 30%, First Aid 35%, History 65%, Intimidate 50%, Language (Own, English) 80%, Language (Other, Ancient Egyptian) 11%, Library Use 50%, Occult 65%, Psychology 40%, Science (Biology) 45%, Science (Chemistry) 51%, Spot Hidden 50%

Credit Rating: 20

Wealth: Average, Spending Level $10, Cash $40 ($10 on her, $30 glove box of the hearse), Assets $1000 (rented apartment ($10/wk rent), used car ($300), refrigerator ($49))

I did look up 1920s hearses to see if there was any option for the hearse to be the part of the family business she owned, but hearses are very expensive, so not a chance. She probably does have access to it, if she wants to alienate her family altogether, but I decided she’d have her own, used but in good condition, 1920 Chevvy Coupe that she keeps at Jo’s so the family don’t know about it. She keeps it mostly for the promise that when things with her brother finally degrade past saving, she can just bug out in her own car, and then the world will be her oyster.

Personal Description: A short, compact woman with bland features once you get past the shiny, twisted burn scar on her face. She smells faintly of chemicals, and tends to be faintly off-putting at the best of times. She’s usually found in driver’s coveralls or men’s clothing, which her family tolerate because she’s generally just not seen, at least not attached to the business.

Ideology & Beliefs: There are forces at work in the world, both evil and spiritual. When you work with the dead, you realise quickly that the body is a frail, useless, damaged thing. There must be more, a breath of some vaster thing, that makes us what we are.

Significant People: Eldridge Webber, her brother, with whom she has a tense relationship, to put it mildly. Edridge is the ‘& Son’ of the Webber & Son funeral home, and will inherit it once their father dies, and has made no bones about the fact that he’ll cut her loose to survive on her own once that happens. He’s also the cause of the scarring on her face, an ‘accident’ when he was 12 and she was 8, and he’d dared her to venture into the embalming room with him. She firmly believes that if her father wasn’t as traditional and had even once considered allowing a female to inherit the business, her brother would have arranged for a much more permanent ‘accident’ for her. Eldridge focuses on the business and glad-handing clients side of the funeral home, while their father still does most of the embalming, so she’s mostly given odd jobs such as driving the hearse and assisting their father in the embalming rooms. She’s almost fine with the knowledge that as soon as the business belongs to her brother, she’ll be out on her ear.

Barnabas Webber, her uncle, who taught her and sponsored her interests despite the ire from the rest of her family. He’s the one who taught her to drive, and the one who sponsored her education so she could get her English and History degree. Now that he’s dead, relations between her and the rest of her family have cooled significantly, not that they were good to start with. He used to be the second Webber in ‘Webber, Webber & Son’, but when he died, Josiah Webber, her father, simply removed that part of the name.

Josephine Razner, a friend from college and fellow spiritualist who shares Asenath’s fascination with history and the occult. Despite Asenath’s generally off-putting demeanour, Jo was delighted by her unusual name, and Asenath’s knowledge of its origins, and they hit it off. Jo is constantly encouraging her to leave the family business altogether and strike out on her own before Eldridge forces the issue for her, but Asenath still feels that would be disloyal to the family as a whole.

Roland Bleeker, a shady sort who has dealings with her brother, and who Asenath is 90% certain is a criminal of some stripe. Both he and Eldridge have attempted several times to get Asenath to do ‘deliveries’ in the hearse that are outside of business hours, and she’s refused them, which has done her relationship with Eldridge no favours either.

Meaningful Locations: Webber & Sons Funeral Home, Arkham. The center around which her world has revolved for almost her entire life, the cause of her worst scars, and the link to her most beloved person, her deceased Uncle Barnabas.

Secondarily, Miskatonic University, the site of some of the happiest times of her life, and the place she met Jo.

Treasured Possessions: A small illustrated copy of Lord Dunsany’s ‘Gods of Pegana’, with a handwritten note on the inside cover from Uncle Barnabas: ‘Dream all the things, dear one. Never stop. Uncle B.’ *(Key Backstory Connection)

Traits: Loyal. Not a lot of people are kind to Asenath, so she will move heaven and earth for the ones that are. She loved Uncle Barnabas with her entire body and soul, and she probably would kill people (or at least find some way to make bodies vanish) for Jo. She’s also stubborn and inclined to stick to her guns in general.

Injuries & Scars: Old chemical burn scars on her right cheek and jaw, deforming her mouth slightly, from an ‘accident’ as a child with the embalming chemicals.

History: From nearly the moment she was born, Asenath Webber’s life has been tied up in the family business, the prosperous Webber & Son funeral home. A dreamy, bookish, stubborn child, she wasn’t popular with most of her family, save only her mother (until her untimely death when Asenath was four) and her Uncle Barnabas, who she utterly adored and has missed terribly these last seven years since his death. After a childhood incident involving her brother left her with permanent scars from chemical burns on her face, she was shunted into the background of family life, away from the public. As a teenager, she had started training as an embalmer, at her father’s side, but her uncle managed to secure a college education for her at Miskatonic University, arguing that it would only enhance the family’s reputation to be able to send her. After her brother, of course, who studied accounting and finance, as befit the heir to the business. Asenath had other interests, however, and a fanciful streak, so her studies were in literature and history. Her own name, and lifelong experience with death, bodies, and the spirituality around them, had also inclined her to more … esoteric studies, and through these she met her dear friend Josephine Razner.

Once she had her degree, however, duty demanded that she return to the funeral home and put her back into the family business. She couldn’t be publicly seen, of course, she was off-putting and inclined to scare off clients, but she found roles as assistant embalmer and, through her talent with automobiles, driver of the funeral home’s hearse. After the death of her uncle, however, and her increasingly strained relationship with her brother as their father gets frailer and the time of his inheritance gets palpably closer, Asenath is looking more and more for a way out before she’s thrown out.

#call of cthulhu #CoC #character concepts #1920s #investigators #undertakers

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jase-is-ace · 1 year

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Back into the Pit

Chapter 35: Forgotten but Not Gone pt. 2

~~~

Twist growled and clenched her fists, lowering her stance to pounce. She barely registered a giant fist colliding with her lower jaw. The demoness fell onto her bottom side and gripped her jaw in pain.

Great to see you too, asshat.

The Ink Demon snarled before ducking under the door frame to enter the hall. He stood over her as she tried to jump back to her feet. She turned and whipped her tail into his face causing him to grunt and flinch back. Twist scrambled away and booked it down the hall.

Maybe she could switch him back somehow.

No.

She was in no way capable of doing such a thing without Audrey. The animator wouldn’t be back for another few hours, fantastic. What if he escapes? She can’t allow that. Face him. Fight him. Restrain him or something.

Anything!

Twist felt the walls darken around her much like the sketched halls of the studio. She turned to see the Ink Demon right beside her. Twist slashed her claws at him and grazed his stained teeth. The large demon caught her hand and pulled her to a stop, twisting her arm into an uncomfortable position. She snarled and tried to break free.

His grip tightened and he pulled it back farther. Twist froze, trying to level her breathing.

“Are you prepared to listen now, Logan?” he spat bitterly at her. She sighed and lowered her shoulders before nodding.

“Good.” He released her and she took a step back to gain some distance.

What do you want?

The Ink Demon stepped closer to her. The narrow hall feeling even smaller with his horns scraping the ceiling, Twist swallowed a lump in her throat. It would be hard to fight back now.

“To talk to you.” He rasped out. The demoness tilted her head in confusion.

Since when were ever the one to reason?

The Ink Demon stared down at her with malice before responding. “Since you have proven that you are in fact, a parasite I will not be able to eradicate.”

Is that supposed to be a compliment? I’ll take it as one.

The now smaller demon shifted uncomfortably as she was just now realizing that he had backed her into the wall. With the sudden feeling of claustrophobia strangling her nerves, she morphed into her toon self and ducked under the Ink Demons’ legs to gain some sort of personal space.

Said demon snarled, causing a violent flinch to erupt from her smaller frame.

No need to get cranky, I just wanted some room to breathe. Your breath is rancid.

“Do you remember any details of your life as a human being?” The Demon grumbled, finally cutting to the chase. Twist pondered, looking down at her boots. For once in her life, she tried to wrack her brain of any likeness to what her life was before the ink realm. Her head started to ache with how much she put thought into it, perhaps that was why she preferred not to remember.

Not really, no.

The Ink Demon slid down into what looked like a sitting position, seeing that the two wouldn’t be going anywhere. Why he so desperately wanted this information to the point that he would willingly sit down was beyond her. “Nothing of the ink realm before it was rebuilt?” he pressed. Twist stared with a vague sense of pain; it was all that she could recall before her rebirth. Her shrill screams filled the halls of that bland studio as the life she clung to was stripped from her grasp.

I remember you fucking tearing me apart.

Something changes in his demeanor at that comment. He looked uncomfortable and not with how small the hallway was compared to him. Twist looked to the ground with furrowed eyebrows.

If she really thought about it, she technically befriended the one who killed her. The demoness shook her head. She would never, couldn’t ever blame Bendy for what happened before he truly existed.

“You were an obstacle that stood in my way for far too long. You initiated that conflict yourself. I merely finished it.”

Twist bared her teeth and growled at him.

No, I did not. You were in MY territory. MY den. I don’t give a damn that you were after Henry. You shouldn’t have crossed that line.

The Ink Demon scoffed at her, “Your territory? The Ink Realm belongs to me. No one else. You didn’t have any ‘territory’ don’t hold such delusions against me.”

Some folk may not have gotten the memo, mistaking me for you. But before your scrawny ass came back, I was the scourge of that hellhole, besides that idiotic tyrant Wilson.

“Do not mention that despicable man in my presence!” A snarl came forth from his throat. Twist followed up with her own warning gaze.

He hurt me too, you know. Basically tore me apart and put me back together again to make me “Perfect”.

At that, the Ink Demon sat back. He looked as if he wanted to say something else but decided against it. Silence consumed the lonely apartment. It was deafening. Neither knew how to carry the conversation on without pissing the other off. The demoness tucked her legs into her chest and sunk her head down. Squeezing her eyes shut to repel the unfond memories of the torture she underwent at the GENT building.

Her counterpart had never felt so out of place, and that was a feeling he was used to at the moment of his creation. He took the time to pick through his toon sides memories to find anything that didn’t make him feel repulsed. He eventually came across one that felt all too familiar.

Apparently, his toon side had an unpleasant dream and requested to be nested with the Ink Demoness. He guessed that this memory took place before Audrey had arrived. He looked on as the demoness pulled him to her side as a means of comfort. It was something he had seen her do even in this very apartment.

Something she would never do for his other, more menacing side.

And how could she? What good would it do to tell her that he was the reason she was stuck in the ink realm to begin with? That he took her good and well-off life away? Not only hers but her friend as well.

Twist lifted her head from her knees to look at the demon before her.

“Are you going to hurt me? Hurt Audrey when she returns?” her hands finally moved.

The question was followed by more silence. What exactly was the plan? He simply wanted to know if Logan was still inside. Whether she would spare him a second of pity like she did once before. Twist was more hardened and stubborn than Logan ever was. He supposed because Logan was inherently weaker at the time. Snapping out of his trance, the demon attempted to answer the question.

“I don’t think I can. I don’t know how we were brought out of the ink realm. And I can’t kill off the two who know how to send me back now can I?” His voice came off viler than he intended.

Twist scoffed and sunk deeper into the wall as if it would cave in and let her escape this unwanted confrontation. She crossed her arms and glared at him to uphold what ever bravery she had left in her soul at the moment.

Always so fucking selfish. Maybe that’s why I can’t seem to befriend you.

This comment sent him into a spiral of emotions that should have been killed off a long, long time ago. And yet she always managed to make them resurface.

“You do not get to label me. You don’t have the full scope.” This time, his tone was less violent and more stern. Before Twist could press further, the sound of the front door being unlocked interrupted her.

Shit. Shit!

The toon sprung to her feet and much to her dismay, so did the Ink Demon. Audrey called out for her companions to assist her as she stepped through the door, holding bags of groceries. The demoness snapped her attention to the Ink Demon.

If you even think about laying a claw on her, I will tear your head off do you understand me?

“As if that worked last time…” The demon berated her. Twist snarled before bolting to the owner of the apartment to hopefully, get her somewhere safe.

The toon started signing frantically as she approached Audrey, causing the animator to place down her bags and inform the little toon that she didn’t quite catch what was she signed.

“Have to leave. Dangerous.” Twist signed, still quickly but slow enough for Audrey to process. The woman was about to request some elaboration when the sound of scrapping caught both girls’ attention. The Ink Demon rounded the corner and flashed his sinister grin at them.

“Hello again, Audrey.” He drew out her name, sending a shiver down her spine.

Twist swallowed.

This was definitely a predicament.

~~~

Chapter 34/ Chapter 36

#bitp #back into the pit #batdr fanfiction #batdr ocs #batdr oc #audrey drew #the ink demon #ink demon #twist #toon twist #ink twist #bendy and the dark revival #jase writes a thing #logan sanders

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sailor-toni · 1 year

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Introducing The Amazing Half-Ghost Drag Queen: Cosmonaut Bethany!

You can also read this on A03, FF.NET, and Wattpad

After his identity is revealed in Phantom Planet, Danny wishes to go back to living a double life. While at college he finds it ion an unexpected way. Through the wonders of Drag shows.

Written for @ectoblastfromthepast for Phicc Phight

Original Prompt: Everyone knows Danny is Phantom. But they don't know about his *other* double life

In the mirror he practiced his routine with his lips, watching as the layers of make up easily moved on his face. If he showed up with cracking makeup the ladies would drag him for miles. Ivana would be the one at the helm, with her tacky ass platform shoes slamming him against the pavement. Danny placed the long flashy lashes on his lash line, fighting the urge to blink.

For years Danny lived a double life, by day he was a normal C average student, and by night he fought ghosts and monsters that traveled into their world. It was a thrilling life full of dangers and violence, and great friends. Although he was paying for it now. The first time he slipped a pale blue strapless gown on, he shuddered at the sight of his muscles poking out of it. He was a cross dressing man who looked like a crossdressing man. And with how he had to fold his dick and with how much that dress cost. He did not want to look like a crossdressing man. He could’ve asked Jazz for help… but she put so little makeup on, Danny didn’t think she knew how to help him. Sam was a second option but he didn’t want to look goth, or emo. Tucker only knew how to make fursuits, and Valerie hated his guts. A lot of people hated his guts when everything was revealed.

Danny Fenton is Danny Phantom! Who could have known! The town shouted. I knew! Wes shouted, and the town continued to cry, who could’ve known! They looked sooooooooo different! Hate and fame were given to him at a half-life as former friendly classmates turned on him.

“Did you not trust me?” They asked. “Why did you never tell me?”

“You know, I always knew you were more than meets the eye,” Dash was the first of the bullies to kiss his ass. The rest soon follow with their own bland lies and brown noses.

Danny begged God for things to change at college. And the monkey paw curled his finger as well; he may not have had history with these people. Everyone wanted to be BFFs with the Ghost Hero who saved the planet from a ghost rock.

Why couldn’t things go back? Danny thought. Back to when he was a nobody could change face and live a completely different life. Then he saw it. Tucker’s Mom had gotten his mom addicted to watching Rupaul's Drag Race. The makeup and hair hid their faces better than his powers could do and they looked like they were having fun.

“Hold still while I get this,” Paulina said, bending her body over his to apply the 35 fake stick-on diamonds to his face.

Yeah, Danny only knew of one person who was an expert at makeup and dresses. Paulina acted like a child at the candy store when Danny sunk into her dorm room with a duffle bag of supplies. She had a sketchbook of looks, ideas, and makeup looks she printed off the internet. Sometimes Danny felt like her personal full size barbie doll. One time she made him a candy land inspired look, complete with a six-foot-tall lollipop wand for him to pole dance around. That was not to say he didn’t have a say in what he could wear. For Paulina’s 21st birthday, he, or should he say, Bethany showed up in full Paulina Sanchez drag. Complete with oversize balloons stuffed into his chest.

No one knew who Bethany actually was. They assumed she was a college friend of Paulia’s. Someone who was a stranger to her old highschool friends. Dash never realized that it was actually Danny under the wig and makeup, not even when he drunkenly began fondling the balloon breasts.

Danny never told his friends or family about the drag either. His parents and friends would accept him of course. But it wouldn’t be a true double life if everyone knew. Just like his performance the double life, the secrets, the moments where if they had come in at the wrong moment. He would have been caught. The thrill of it all gave him a burst of joy. A reminder of what life used to be.

Paulina pushed herself off him and grabbed the mirror. “How do you look?” she asked.

Danny wore an orange 50’s inspired space dress that jumped straight out of an old movie. His star studded wig was contained in a plastic helmet, with a hole cut out for his orange and navy makeup. Finally he stood on high go-go platform boots.

“I like it,” Danny said, giving it a twirl.

“Perfect! Now remember, if you win the prize, I want to try on the crown!” Paulina said.

“Of course. But no instagram pics with it.”

“I got it! Now do your ghost thing and let me know what happens.”

“I will, thank you by the way.”

“Don’t mention it.”

Danny phased out of her room, his go-go boots slid on the air, invisible to the city under him. Nerves inginiting in his stomach, threatening to burst till he was on the stage of the night club, dancing to girls just wanna have fun. The crowd cheered at his flips, kicks, and his ‘magic’ tricks. The cards hidden within the fabric of his dress phased through the fabric and into his hands. His muscles allowed him to handstand on stage and twerk in the air. His final act of a triple flip ending in a split sent the crowd into a firestorm. The dollar bills rained down on him.

This morning he was Danny Fenton the hero of the world, but right now he was Cosmonaut Bethany, participating before a crowd. Bethany didn’t win the crown for the next upcoming Miss Amity Park, but Danny had a great time with the other queens afterwards.

#Phic Phight #phic phight 2023 #Danny Phantom #drag show #fun #humor #writing #write #paulina #no ship

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mariacallous · 2 years

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On 8 March, two weeks into the war in Ukraine, Yanina Chmunevich stood in her grassy garden in Bobryk, 35 miles north-east of Kyiv, smoking a cigarette. As it burned to the filter, she counted 87 Russian heavy armoured vehicles going by, including earth-moving equipment, trucks, armoured personnel carriers and cars with long-barrelled guns attached. The next day, she watched the Russians bring in rocket launchers.

Three months later, Chmunevich, 39, who had worked at a petrol station before the war, was steadily recounting the details of the occupation of Bobryk as she sat on a sun porch in a plaid shirt and pink socks. A Ukrainian human rights investigator, Maryna Slobodianiuk, listened intently as she spoke. Slobodianiuk, 40, is a slight woman with a pouf of rust-coloured hair and a voice so quiet that you have to lean in close to hear her properly. But her mild manner is deceptive: as the head of investigations at Ukrainian nonprofit Truth Hounds, researching war crimes and crimes against humanity, she has been to the frontlines in Donetsk, Mykolaiv and Kharkiv, enduring constant bombardment, to record the stories of traumatised survivors.

Chmunevich described a visit from Russian soldiers in March. The men – who Chmunevich identified by their accents as Chechens or Armenians – lined her and four of her relatives up along a wall, confiscated their phones and asked for water. The family had already deleted their social media accounts in case there was anything pro-Ukrainian the Russians could find.

Throughout her recounting, Chmunevich slouched in a wooden chair and spoke in flat tones, her recitation almost mechanical. Like many Ukrainians I met during my three weeks in the country, after repeated questioning by journalists and investigators, she described terrifying events in a way that made them sound as bland as a discussion of the weather.

Her husband asked the Russians why they had come to Ukraine.

“To kill Zelenskiy and the Nazis,” one of them replied.

The Russians were in Bobryk for three weeks. While they were there, a group of Russian soldiers had taken over a neighbour’s property. Chmunevich had been able to watch them through narrow gaps in her boarded-up windows. She described hearing explosions from the direction of a nearby lake. She had heard from neighbours that the town’s mayor and a shop owner had been kidnapped, led away with plastic bags over their heads. Both men had endured beatings. The shop owner was later shot in the arm. He was told his crime was to have had a security camera at his store. It did not seem to matter that the camera wasn’t working.

Since the start of the invasion in February, three Truth Hounds investigators have been crisscrossing the country, recording first-hand accounts and documenting evidence of atrocities in line with the standards of the international criminal court (ICC) in The Hague, with which they remain in constant touch. They began their work in 2014 when the Russians invaded Crimea, but the very fact that Slobodianiuk was able to gather information in areas so recently occupied, and in such detail, is a unique aspect of this war. The international media, too, has had unprecedented access. As I observed the interview on Chmunevich’s porch, on the outer ring of watchers was a documentary team from a Turkish news channel.

“This is the most-covered war probably in history – by journalists, but also by these missions of investigators coming from every country in Europe and the ICC,” said Tetiana Pechonchyk, the head of the board of Zmina, a Kyiv-based media and human rights advocacy organisation. Zmina is part of a consortium of more than a dozen Ukrainian NGOs called the 5am Coalition. The Russians invaded at 5am on 24 February, and Ukrainians I met referred to it constantly.

Pechonchyk, an authority on war crimes, wore a red suit and matching lipstick when we met at a fish restaurant in Kyiv in July. She acknowledged this war has received “unprecedented attention”, and yet, “given the scale of atrocities”, she said, “it’s not enough. The war is ongoing, and every day the prosecutor’s office registers 100 or 200 more cases, and that doesn’t even include information from occupied areas.” As of 22 September, the prosecutor’s office had 34,000 cases filed, every one of which must be investigated, according to Ukrainian law. However, matching and corroborating information from even meticulous investigations is a process that will take years.

There may never have been a war so thoroughly scrutinised as it unfolds. Investigators move in as soon as the Russians leave, within 24 to 48 hours. The country has a more-or-less functioning judiciary, unlike, for instance, Rwanda during the 1994 genocide, where any semblance of a previously existing court system was obliterated during the three months of violence. The question remains: will all this evidence-gathering in Ukraine actually lead to convictions in a tolerable time frame, and will any of it be enough to implicate the people at the top of the command structure?

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thylacinetears · 1 year

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I've taken forever to post this, but here's my full ESC2023 ranking!

With comments and scores out of 10! Long post obvs:

#37 Romania: DGT - Theodor Andrei: (0.5) Gross, boring, just all-around terrible. The staging is awful. The singing is bad ("aLL oF YouR DEmoNs coMe SCREEEMIMANNEHHH" haunts my dreams). The lyrics are gross, and the attempt at wordplay doesn't even make sense? All of it is trying so, so hard to be sexy and failing miserably. Half a point for having some Romanian, but that's it.

#36 San Marino: Like An Animal - Piqued Jacks: (1.0) Worst singer this year and it's not even close. The lyrics are also terrible and kinda give me creepy vibes. 100 songs in the national final and this is the best they can get? But it does get one point for having a pretty good instrumental, and the drummer is killing it.

#35 Albania: Duje - Albina & Familja Kelmendi: (2.0) Really overdramatic. I don't like the instrumental, it's way too sparse and random. The message is meant to be pro-family but it just comes off as anti-divorce? But the intention is nice, and Albania having a song in their own language for once is nice.

#34 Greece: What They Say - Victor Vernicos: (2.5) Just generic. There's not much I can say about this song because I forget it every time I stop listening. It's not intolerable to listen to, I guess?

#33 Germany: Blood & Glitter - Lord of the Lost: (2.5) It's unique, but somehow really boring. I don’t really like this genre so I'm biased, but this is just noise to me.

#32 Switzerland: Watergun - Remo Forrer: (3.0) Nice voice and piano, but wtf is Switzerland doing singing about war? I don't like the lyrical execution of the concept at all. Definitely not a fan.

#31 Malta: Dance (our own party) - The Busker: (3.5) It's a nice sax riff, but they run it into the goddamn ground. The rest of the song just isn't very good. It's cool, but kinda annoying.

#30 Ireland: We Are One - Wild Youth: (3.5) Also very generic, but it has a nice arena-pop sound to it. The message is well-intentioned, though so incredibly overdone.

#29 Lithuania: Stay - Monika Linkyte: (4.0) Nice concept, but it just sounds really bland to me. I don't really know what I don't like about this song, but it just doesn't click with me.

#28 Denmark: Breaking My Heart - Reiley: (4.0) It is very much corporate TikTok bait. But there is a good song underneath all that, and I actually like the vocoder.

#27 Croatia: Mama SC - Let 3: (5.0) Yeah, it's very weird. I don't like the repetition, but I do unironically like the instrumental in the "Onaj mali psihopat" part. Not the best novelty/political song, but not the worst - solid 5/10.

#26 Azerbaijan: Tell Me More - TuralTuranX: (5.5) I like it, it's quite nice and feel-good. But it seems like a complete rip-off of Something Good by Bic Runga?

#25 Poland: Solo - Blanka: (5.5) Ignoring the context and that live performance… It's a bop! It's not super original but it's really catchy and fun.

#24 Israel: Unicorn - Noa Kirel: (6.0) Kinda disappointing, after all the hype. (Why couldn't she have saved Thought About That for ESC instead!) But it has a nice chorus, and some good hooks.

#23 United Kingdom: I Wrote A Song - Mae Muller: (6.0) Very British, and very pop! But that chorus just doesn't really hit for me, and I'm not a fan of the spoken word part.

#22 Cyprus: Break a Broken Heart - Andrew Lambrou: (6.0) This is actually a banger though! I'm biased because Australia, but still. Simple concept but good execution.

#21 Georgia: Echo - Iru: (6.0) No, I don't know what on earth is going on in the lyrics either - guess that's just Georgia though. I love the drama of the instrumental, and Iru has a really powerful voice!

#20 Portugal: Ai Coracao - Mimicat: (6.5) It's cool! I love the culture, and Mimicat has a great voice. But for some reason it doesn't really click with me.

#19 Moldova: Soarele si luna - Pasha Parfeni: (6.5) I'm usually a big fan of the folktronica entries, but this doesn't quite hook me as much as Fulenn or SHUM. But it's still pretty good, and I love the concept of the lyrics!

#18 Serbia: Samo mi se spava - Luke Black: (7.0) Super unique! It's good, it's just that there's so many good entries this year, so it doesn't stand out so much. Gives me Grimes vibes, like a hybrid of Violence and My Name Is Dark.

#17 Belgium: Because Of You - Gustaph: (7.0) So incredibly unapologetically queer, and I love it for that. Such a fun song, makes me want to get up and dance!

#16 Iceland: Power - Dilja: (7.0) Uplifting, upbeat, poppy - this season needed a song like this. She absolutely kills those vocals, too!

#15 Italy: Due Vite - Marco Mengoni: (7.5) Really gorgeous and emotional, with incredibly beautiful lyrics. I get chills when that second chorus comes in, honestly. But it's just not quite as good as Italy's other entries.

#14 Armenia: Future Lover - Brunette: (7.5) Has a real 2000s pop/RnB diva vibe, and I love the lyrics. The instrumental is amazing, and I love the blend of genres.

#13 Ukraine: Heart Of Steel - TVORCHI: (7.5) I love the RnB groove mixing with the dramatic violins! It's really grown on me since it was first released, it's just super slick.

#12 Austria: Who the Hell is Edgar? - Teya & Salena: (7.5) So wacky, and yet such a bop. It manages to successfully balance a hilarious concept, catchy beat, and somehow a serious and relevant message? I actually can't believe they managed it. Well done, enjoy your gas station champagne from me streaming it, lmao.

#11 Latvia: Aija - Sudden Lights: (8.0) There's no other song like it this year (or maybe any year!), and I love its post-rock sound. However I admit that at least 50% of why I love this song is that outro.

#10 Norway: Queen of Kings - Alessandra: (8.0) THE pop banger we needed! I love the electronic bassline and Alessandra's incredible vocals.

#9 Australia: Promise - Voyager: (8.0) Not at all my genre, but I love it! That electronic intro and his vocals are everything. I don't like the scream after the second chorus, but the rest is amazing.

#8 Czechia: My Sister's Crown - Vesna: (8.5) Unique, cultural, powerful, and arguably the best chorus of the year. Those harmonies, man. Czechia is absolutely killing it at the moment.

#7 Estonia: Bridges - ALIKA: (8.5) This makes me really emotional, as I definitely relate to the lyrics. But even without considering that, this is just everything good about ballads - gorgeous piano, excellent vocals, and beautifully convincing delivery.

#6 Spain: Eaea - Blanca Paloma: (9.0) I'm so glad Spain went traditional this year. Hypnotising, gentle and yet powerful. The imagery of the lyrics is so beautiful, and of course Blanca's incredible voice carries the whole thing.

#5 Netherlands: Burning Daylight - Mia Nicolai & Dion Cooper: (9.0) The Netherlands continues its sad era with this gorgeous song. I love the two voices, the lyrics, the slightly detuned piano... But most of all I love the outro - I relate to it so much.

#4 Finland: Cha Cha Cha - Kaarija: (9.0) THE icon of the season. This really is worth the hype - fun, dancey, crazy, party! It really hits its stride in the second half, but honestly I just love the whole thing.

#3 France: Evidemment - La Zarra: (9.5) I'm a France stan, what can I say! But they just keep sending quality - from the dramatic intro to that incredible disco-pop beat drop to the amazing bridge.

#2 Slovenia: Carpe Diem - Joker Out: (9.5) Basically my favourite from the beginning! It puts you in a good mood from the first line, and just keeps the energy all the way through to the end. My favourite part is the guitar solo after the first chorus leading into the second verse. It's so cool...

#1 Sweden: Tattoo - Loreen: (10.0) Right in my dance-pop loving heart. Loreen is truly like no other - a once-in-a-generation performer. When that second chorus hits... It's almost too perfect. But I love how there's that unusual chord progression to keep you interested, too. There's just nothing to fault about it, I love every single second!

#eurovision #esc 2023 #eurovision song contest #eurovision ranking #eurovision 2023

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