#we miss each other when we go to the fucking bathroom too lol we’re insane but we are free
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nsfw tmi annoying sexual oversharing r/ihavesex tags etc etc…
#holy shit is dirty talk fucjing good lol like a half hour ago that was the hottest time yet jesus christ im still reeling….#i cant even think straight. the things he said to me when i was sucking his fingers…. 🥴#that was definitely worth the wait lol he’s so fucking hot i cant stand it#im so over the fucking moon in love with him it’s insane every single thing is perfect we’re best friends who havethe best sex fucking ever#we’re two peas in a pod and it’s so clear to me now after coming back to his house after leaving today and just the relief of getting to lay#in his arms while we tell each other about our day apart while he rubs my arms back and hair. i just felt whole when that happened.#he said he wasn’t sure he wants to hang out with his old friend again bc quite ‘his jokes weren’t funny’ LOL he said after every joke he’d#just give him the autism stare as it fell flat lmao but that means *I* make him laugh! which i do. (<- self absorbed narcissist)#he just fell asleep next to me after a LOOOONG ass day and i already miss him how lame and codependent of me#we miss each other when we go to the fucking bathroom too lol we’re insane but we are free#sorry.#*quote not quite
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she is very long so. enjoy😌
- Steve n Bucky going to the bodega down the street from their apartment. it’s open till like 4am and they go at all hours. sometimes they’ll go separately but they always go together when they go in between 12-4 am and no one who works there questions why
- they get a cat that they treat her like their child. it’s Alpine ofc😌 steve loves her so much but he knows it’s Bucky’s Cat and he’s fine with it
- you know how some siblings or partners or friends can communicate with their eyes and basically have telepathy? they totally have that and it annoys the shit out of every single person they meetjdksndks. someone will be talking to them and they will just make eye contact with each other bc it reminded them of an earlier convo they had or they both got annoyed by the other person or it reminds them of an inside joke or something and it just irritates EVERYONE. no one is able to intercept it and it’s just a thing that no matter what - even though they don’t mean to - you’ll feel a little left out when you’re with steveandbucky. it just comes with the gig. i like to imagine that depending on if it’s an au or not, its either really obvious or not. like in an au then yes it’s obvious they can have non verbal conversations, but if it’s not an au then it’s not entirely obvious bc they’re enhanced humans and they know how to hide their secret conversations. but everyone they talk to is essentially an enhanced human or has special abilities so it’s obvious to them and they catch them in the act LOL. if they’re interacting with regular people then it’s not very obvious though
- DATE NIGHT!!! yes they’re old yes they have date night. when they go out it’s usually to places in their neighborhood, but a lot of the time they like to stay in bc. they’re old men <3 steve is better at cooking and bucky is better at baking bc you can get creative with cooking and steve likes that more. he enjoys baking a lot too but he thinks bucky’s stuff tastes better. whenever they stay home though there’s ALWAYS a movie. always. they alternate choosing but there is always a movie to watch. bucky usually falls asleep nearing the end and steve plays with his hair😌 he rolls his eyes cause it happens every time but he actually likes when it happens bc he can braid strands of hair together
- pet names oh my god. so many pet names. every single one. mainly from bucky. steve uses them but maybe like two. he favors sweetie and buck and that’s it really. sometimes he uses hon. bucky though oh my god. every single pet name under the sun. so many variations of doll you wouldn’t believe - baby doll ofc, dolly, stevie doll. sweetheart. sweetness. blondie. pretty boy. hot stuff. stevie. baby. hon. honey. sunshine. angel. it’s just so many. and it’s like very sickening insane twisted etc but hot at the same time. most people are like jeez barnes do you ever shut up… but most of these people secretly think it’s a little hot theyre thinking damn where is that affection for me…. i need me a bucky barnes :| steve is the only smitten kitten outwardly even if he huffs and puffs sometimes but it’s obvious he enjoys it. like they are so annoyingjdkssn for real they aren’t a pda couple really but the petnames….. so many. so so so many it’s sickeningly sweet but bucky dgaf! steve is his sweetheart his dolly his baby his angel so he’s going to call him these things!
- steve knows his body is what is considered “perfect” but he still is insecure about it around most people and bucky knows this so when steve lounges at home in bucky’s boxer briefs and his own tee shirt or he kicks off his pants when he’s too hot at night in bed bucky is reminded of just how much steve loves him and feels comfortable around him which is something he always strives for - to make steve comfortable. not baby him because steve bitches at anyone that does that to him but to make him feel comfortable
- and on the subject of feeling comfortable i imagine that they always check in with one another but it’s very subconscious they hardly realize they do it. like steve will bitch at bucky to pick up his shoes from their doorway or to clean his hair from the shower drain but the next second he will ask him if his back still hurts from being kicked by sam and from where steve AND alpine scratched him (in very different ways)
- steve is the sweater husband and bucky is the sweatshirt husband. they trade off a lot but that’s just how their closets look
- steve takes a liking to crop tops 😌 but ONLY around the house bc again he’s really truly only comfortable around bucky. he wears em with boxer briefs or sweatpants but you can guarantee that the briefs and sweats usually just end up on the floor 9 out of 10 times
- hair ties everywhere. they can be found on the floor in the laundry in their bed in the couch on top of the fridge on their fire escape. they are literally everywhere. steve just picks them up and puts them in the bathroom but they always make their way back. he doesn’t say anything to bucky until he finds alpine chewing one and she ends up smacking herself in the face with the hairtie
- their fridge is always full with leftovers and food from sam or clint’s or whoever’s house or takeout. they always eat it all but they get and make a lot of food so the fridge is always full
- subconsciously bucky always has a hand on the back of steve’s neck. like it’s not ENTIRELY a possessive thing but he used to do it a lot when steve was small because it was easy and it was comfortable. for him and just for him and steve. it was like swinging an arm around steve’s shoulders or putting a hand on his shoulder. it was just natural and easy so he did it. a part of him back then prewar did it possessively too, but he always tampered that down bc steve wasn’t his. now he does it without shame
- steve really likes tofu and vegan meat, non dairy milk like almond and soy, and overall a lot of non dairy vegan foods, and a lot of fruits. he gets made fun of for a lot specifically about the vegan stuff but his reasoning is that there’s so much food accessible for people with allergies in the future that he wished existed a hundred years ago so he’s going to try it and stick with it if he likes it. people shut up after that
- he also tips a little more than he needs to everywhere he goes. everywhere. like it’s cool when steve rogers walks in to a restaurant bc he’s a superhero or whatever but its REALLY cool because he leaves a generous tip and that’s what really makes peoples day
- before they get legally married they are still very much married. like “i packed you lunch, meet me at the restaurant instead of me going to pick you up bc it’ll take longer, i got takeout let’s bitch together while we watch shitty reality tv, let’s bitch at EACH OTHER through the phone in public, let’s send each other ugly pictures of each other or funny texts while we’re right next to each other, i’m out with a group and you’re not there and i say multiple times ‘i miss steve/bucky’, let’s yell at each other from opposite ends of the apartment instead of getting up to see each other, steve i’m going to fuck you on the couch bc our room is too far, etc.” they are just very much married without the documents and legalities and it’s very obvious
okay all of these were ABSOLUTELY wonderful and im really going to restrain my urge to respond to each and every one but that might be futile
-okay YES they definitely go to that bodega at all hours, and usually it's for normal things when they go separately: milk, cereal, toilet paper. but when they go in the middle of the night, they almost always purchase some like odd assortment of candies and deli meat. also, they're always in their pajamas. like bucky's in plaid pj pants and a star wars sweatshirt, and steve is in like 5" shorts and a huge crewneck and they're both in slides and they definitely only speak russian to each other when they're in there after hours
-yes alpine! they also have a dog, that is more steve than bucky's!! his name is norman in my headcanon (and a couple of my fics) and he is best boy
-okay i need more of this in my general stucky life: steve and bucky being like,,, best friends as well as lovers and being so seamlessly close. like yeah, they definitely talk with their eyes, or just one glance, or half-sentences ("hey, did you ever get to--" "yup, on the way home. it was so--" "yeah, good. glad to hear") and they know exactly what the other is saying.
-yes to the date nights!!! and when they stay in to watch movies, they make Tons of popcorn. and they Have to make separate batches, because steve will Only eat his with like half a bottle of that powdered white cheddar on his
-YES we share the same fucking headcanon for petnames on god
Steve: love you, buck:)
Bucky: love you, pumpkin
-Steve definitely has body dysmorphia, probably even post serum (I have lots of thoughts on this, that might be a different post) and yeah, Bucky definitely knows its Big that he feels comfortable enough to be exposed around him (and he's even more honored that steve lets him be intimate with him, because that's really hard for steve, too)
-yeah! and easy check ins like "ur stomach still bothering you from last night?" "oh, no it was just a little bug turns out" or like "my head hurts:(" "i have meds in my bag. you want?" "yeah, just two" or like subtly checking on injuries, yeah
-yeah the sweater versus sweatshirt tracks tbh i picture steve in a lot of crewnecks so yeah
-STEVE IN CROP TOPS STEVE IN CROP TOPS and i raise you they're often ones he's cropped himself and he's also painted on! or bleach painted!! and theyre so cool and bucky never wants to make a big deal out of it, but he's so proud of steve for expressing himself like that
-ALPINE SMACKING HERSELF ALKFJALSDKFJA also steve always has a hairtie on HIS wrist in case bucky forgets one for himself
-they also always have Steve Staple Foods cuz i headcanon steve as a picky eater (adhd!steve + serum enhancements, it's down to a formula) so they have a lot of Kraft mac and cheese and easy heat up meals and lunch meats around for when he's having bad food days
-OMG and steve absolutely MELTS i raise you, too, bucky will especially hold the back of his neck when he needs to get steve to Chill Out. so like if he sees him stressing he'll put his hand on the back of his neck and squeeze and literally feel the tension drain from him or like if steve is having a panic attack, he'll hold the back of his neck while they breathe together
-yes and also any time that steve is Choosing food for himself and feeling motivated to eat it, it's a win, so people learn to back off there, too
-yes! he tips generously, but never awkwardly or offensively. he's also super kind and patient to food service workers!
-this last point is so perfect i cant. like yeah, back to steve and bucky just being,,,, the best of friends. ugly selfies galore, shoving their feet in each other's face, flicking each others ears. and yes, all the fucking gossiping. on the phone gossip, venting, fun gossip from around work. they talk about it all. and it's so great for them
thank you again for stopping by! your thoughts are impeccable!
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Twelve Days Of Christmas
Summary: Dean never realized that Y/N missed Christmas until he turned off an annoying Christmas song on the radio on the way home from a hunt, now he will make it his personal mission to give her the Christmas he misses so much, and if he plays his cards right, maybe he will give her what he has wanted to give her for so many years, himself.
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader
Written For: @spnchristmasbingo
Square Field: Christmas Pajamas
Word Count: 1963
Warnings: Fluff, Dean on Ice Skates, lol. Fluff
A/N: This is to help me catch up on my SPN Christmas Bingo card lol Chapter 6 will post tomorrow! I knew chapter will post every day until Christmas! I know I’m insane lol. This is a real time fic collection and all mistakes will be my own! Please do not copy my work! Hope you all enjoy these!!
**SERIES MASTERLIST** **MASTERLIST** **BECOME A PATREON**
Hibbing, Minnesota was a small town that had an almost rustic, old-time feel to it. The old stores that lined the streets downtown spared no expense in decking themselves out for the holiday season, and you could have sworn that you had taken a step back in time as soon as Dean turned Baby onto the main street in the town where most everything was located.
You could even see Dean out of the corner of your eye looking around excitedly as he drove down the street. Pedestrians were walking around with bags and in their warmest winter attire. You could hear the faint ding of the Salvation Army bells ringing from the corners. If you listened hard enough you could even hear the kids you just passed laughing as they launched snowballs at each other from around the old light post in the street.
Dean smiled to himself as he watched you take in the sights around you. The smile that graced your face makes his world seem all the more brighter. In the dark world that he had been thrust into at such a young age, when you found the slightest little bit of light you tend to cling to it. His hand twitched on the steering wheel, and for just a moment he almost took your hand in his before he caught himself. He didn’t want to move too fast.
You weren’t just some quick fuck to him, you weren’t just something to do. You had come to mean the world to Dean, and even though his feelings for you were a big driving force in all this he was doing for you, he wanted to make sure for the first time he did it the right way, and not in some rushed hurry in some truck stop bathroom or a motel quickie. He wanted you to fall for him the way he’d fallen for you if that was possible. Even if it was selfish to want you, he did, and there wasn’t any changing that. He was tired of trying to stay away from you.
Finally, Baby’s wheels came to a crunching stop in the middle of the street at a little shop, and before you could get out of the car Dean grabbed your shoulder, stopping you.
“Stay here Sweetheart,” he tells you before jetting out of the car before you had time to argue. You watch with intense curiosity through Baby’s frost kissed windows as Dean made his way to the counter to talk to the elderly gentleman that was working there.
The older man disappeared into a small room that you couldn’t see and returned with two boxes in his hands, passing them to Dean, as well as a bag, before Dean paid the man, and made his way back to Baby, throwing the bag in the back seat before passing your box to you, and shutting the car door against the bitter chill of the wind outside.
“Open it,” he said excitedly.
You would have normally given him hell about how Hallmark this was, but those bright green eyes left no room for kidding, so you gingerly pulled the lid off of the box on to your lap. Finding a brand new pair of Ice Skates will be in their protective paper wrapping.
You were smiling like an idiot, and you knew it, but the fact that he’d gone through his much planning and preparation made your heart feel like it was going to fly out of your chest and flutter around the room.
“Dean, are we going ice skating?” you asked excitedly as he put Baby in drive, and began to slowly pull away from the curb.
“Yep, I remember you saying you used to go with our dad when you were a little girl. Every year Donna said they open up an outdoor ice rink for everyone in town, and I just had to bring you.”
You could have cried on the spot, your eyes and heart were swimming with so many emotions as Dean smiled a little while he drove down the road towards your destination. You couldn’t believe he paid that much attention to you, much less remember everything you had told him about your life before hunting the way he was slowly revealing he did.
When the car parked out in the parking lot, you leaned over in a moment of bravery and placed a kiss to his stubbled covered cheek, and threw your arms around his neck the best you could in the car with a box of skates in your lap. He never hesitated or pushed you away, he just wrapped his arm around you, hugging you back like his life depended on it.
“Thank you for this Dean, it means the world to me,” you tell him, and you could have sworn he placed a kiss on the top of your hate covered head, but it was so fast that you couldn't be sure.
“Anything for you Y/N/N, you know that.”
It had been years since you had been on a pair of skates, and Dean said he’d only ever did it once or twice in his entire life, but you found your footing quickly. It really was almost like riding a bike. Dean was taking it a little slower, but cat-like reflexes he’d developed as a hunter had him moving pretty well after only falling on his butt three times.
Dean was surprisingly more graceful than people ever gave him credit for. Years of fighting had taught him how to move in a way that made him limber and almost fluid. You could see it in the way he moved now next to you as the pair of you glided alone in a circle with the rest of the moving crowd. You laughed harder than you had in years when Dean collided with the ice the first time, and the second, and this third, each time growling out an adorable “son of a bitch”, but he was determined, and now you would think he’d been doing this for years.
You were so distracting watching him move next to you that when a group of teenagers sped past you it knocked you off of your balance, but before you could actually collide with the ice Dean’s strong arms wrapped around you, leaning against the makeshift wall they had placed as a barricade around the ring to balance the pair of you. His breath fogging out in front of him and mingling with your own as you repositioned yourself.
His eyes scanned your face, as his gloved hand came up to brush the hair away from your face that had fallen when you lost your balance, his piercing green eyes boring into yours as your heart pounded away against your ribcage, which had nothing to do with the near-fall you almost took, and everything to do with the fact that this Adonis of a man still hand his arms securely around you even after you regained your footing.
“You okay,” he asked, his breath coming out of his parted pink lips in white puffs. He was so close to you smell the gum he’d been chewing. Your entire body tingled with excitement, for just a moment you thought he was going to kiss you, but just before he would have followed through he straightened and laced his fingers with you.
Blushing furiously you cleared your throat and smiled at him, nodding because there was no way in hell your throat was going to allow you to speak. It felt like it had literally caved in on itself the moment you realize just how close Dean was to you.
Dean’s eyes searched you over like a protective mother hen, still worried, always worried.
“Your cold Y/N/N, your shivering,” he stated, taking his top layer coat off of his body and draping it over your shoulders. “We’ve been out here for a few hours. What do you say we head back, take a hot shower, and make something hot and laced with alcohol.”
You blink a few times as the scent of his cologne laced in his jacket clouded your sense, and his hand rejoined your own.
“Yeah, that sounds great.”
Dean helped you from the ice and out of your skates before getting his own and placing them in the back seat, turning up Baby’s heater to warm you. The drive to the cabin back through town was peaceful. You hadn’t noticed that you had been out most of the day, but the sun sinking pink behind the clouds added an enchanted feel to the little town as you went. Day 9 had by far been the best yet, and if today was the last day you’d cherish this time with Dean forever.
Still, Dean wasn’t done, far from it.
Once you got back to the cabin, he grabbed your arm, stopping you from going to the shower with the bag you had all but forgotten from earlier in his hand, holding it out for you to take.
You took the bag suspiciously in hopes of getting that full-body laugh from him again that he did the other day, and it worked to your surprise.
“What’s the suspicious look for sweetheart, it’s not gonna bite! Open it! You’re gonna need it before you take a shower!”
You pulled the tissue paper from the top of the bag, and two pairs of Christmas pajamas, complete with socks, were waiting for you. One for you, and one for Dean.
“Oh my God! You’re actually gonna wear Christmas pajamas?” you asked him in disbelief, pulling out your Elf pajamas as well as Dean’s which proudly declared “Merry Christmas you filthy animal,” across the front.
“What can I say, they looked warm, and it’s a classic,” he said, taking his pair from you. “Now if any pictures of this rare occurrence surface once we’re back at the bunker just know I might have to kill you.”
You snort out a laugh, hugging him again, and enjoying the way he all but melted against you. His hand going to your hair to play with your hair as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
“Now, you know I make not promise Winchester,” you tease him when you finally force yourself to let go of him.
His eyes narrow at you playfully.
“You better go take that shower Sweetheart, or else I’m gonna go first and use all the hot water,” he teases you, snatching up his pajamas and making his way into the kitchen to start on some hot chocolate for the two of you.
You grin your way towards the small bathroom, mind swearing with events from earlier today. You would have never guessed this side of Dean existed. You definitely weren’t going to be ready to get back to reality once Christmas was over. Even as you sat tucked safely into his side with his arm around you later that night, several cups of adult hot chocolate in, and about three episodes of Dr. Sexy M.D. deep you still couldn’t believe just how lucky you were that he would care enough to do this for you.
Dean, on the other hand, was just as surprised that you were willing to do this with him at all, and didn’t tell him to fuck off the moment he bought the present on night 12. He didn’t think it was even possible, but somehow, right here with you tucked safely against him for the first time he could see himself with a happy ending, and that was a gift enough for him this year.
He was sure you were all he’d ever need.
Forever Tags:
@deandreamernp
@forgetthisbull
@miraclesoflove
@deanwanddamons
@rvgrsbrns
@chevyharvelle
@onethirstyunicorn
@i-love-superhero
@lyss-dw79
@magssteenkamp
@lemondropirwin
@squirrelnotsam
@hobby27
@spnbaby-67
@mrsjenniferwinchester
@defenderrosetyler
@screechingartisancashbailiff
@thecreatiivecorner
@vicmc624
@busy-bee-angel-misska
@justanotherwinchester
@brilovesdeanwinchester
@idksupernatural
@lyarr24
@amandamdiehl
@miraclesoflove
@emoryhemsworth
@dean-winchesters-gardian-angel
@softsebastian
@tatted-trina6
@anaelsbrunette
@hayleeharling
@flamencodiva
@coldmuffinbanditshoe
@dirty-pan-goblin
@itmejado
@supernatural3002
@teresa-67
@thoughts-and-funnies
@hearteyes-j2
@miss-nerd95
@writers-whirlwind
@peaches007
@bobbie3939
Jensen and Dean’s Babes
@akshi8278
@love-jackles-37-blog
@supernatural-bellawinchester
@bobbie3939
Twelve Days Of Christmas Tag List:
@440mxs-wife
#dean winchester#dean winchester x reader#spnchristmasbingo#dean winchester x you#dean winchester fanfiction#dean winchester fanfic#dean winchester series#dean x you#dean x reader#x reader inserts#jensen ackles#twelve days of christmas#jawritter
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Well
Welp, feeling like doing an update because there's been a lot going on to be honest. its one of those weird dichotomies where every day feels like an eternity and there's so much going on and then you look back and you're like oh, ok its just my brain making it difficult and making things take forever but anyway.
LOCKDOOOOOOOWWWWWWNNNNNNN
Lockdown life was good, apart from being thrust into it so suddenly dave left a banana on his desk. Wasn't great to come back to after 5 weeks out of the office - mummified mouldy banana!! Classic. We luckily got our first jab before lockdown started so that was good, and we were reasonably well stocked up on food and were generally a lot healthier this lockdown that last. honestly, there's a level of chill and serenity in lockdown that i just love. the ability to set my own schedule and only work the hours I actually work to get the job done? Amazing. getting 8.5 hours of sleep each night without having to wake to an alarm blaring? AMAZING. getting to go for walks every afternoon? SO FLIPPING GOOD. I love it so much, I really really do. I need this to be my life permanently.
WORK
Work is just ongoing and draining and honestly, coming back to the office was so fucking stressful and it was only one day. Being at home is just the fucking bomb. Pending home decisions, I wanna go contracting I think, but also ideally two part time contracts to have more flexibility? I dunno. You'd think a big 4 would provide variety but it really doesn't and honestly, with Richie leaving, wellington is just a sinking ship. Sean's off on parental leave, Kirstyn is down to four days a week, ben will be gone if he doesn't get promoted (and I don't think he will be tbh). Jack is just muddling along, Nigel wants to swap to consulting as well, Matt's going to be a shit leader in terms of bringing in work so it's just not going to work. and in our wider group it's going to get even more messy with heaps of the analysts leaving and a couple of senior hires too. so I think it's probably time to jump ship in general, pending the home stuff below. Also, coming back after a break again, I'm like, I don't actually like a lot of you? All the people I enjoy here are in other teams and groups, and I'll be sad to leave you all, but like, not enough to stay anyway lol.
Pending the home below, two options are to just going and get a job with a $30k payrise to make up for the maternity leave benefits I'm gunna leave behind when I leave this role - 18 weeks full pay, $100 a week for the first year back and a full year of maternity leave. It's basically 30k post tax which is a bit nuts to walk away from to be honest.
Otherwise the other option is to go contracting. Less security overall but holy shit so much money. If I went in as a project coordinator at the lowest rate to build up a bit of a portfolio I'd need to work 40 weeks of 40 hr weeks and Id basically match my current salary plus the lost family leave benefits and still qualify for govt maternity leave payments. Realistically I could go in as a project manager for $140 an hour ($60 more an hour than the above math) and absolutely smash it at that level as well so ya know, there's a bunch of other info. I like the idea of the flexibility of it and only having 6 months even if its a shitshow and beign able to walk away at the end of it. I really don't want to get a govt job and this is a v govt town which is fine but also, if I can avoid it that would be great. I just know I'm not gunna thrive in that environment.
Need to talk to Dave to get him across the line on the security issue part of that though. I've mostly come a long way in terms of my financial management (thanks YNAB) so I think he'd be ok with it mostly.
So there's a lot to toss up there because......
HOME
We got the reno plans done during lockdown, finally. which was super good. but holy fkn jesus $$$$$$ ++++++++++. The guy is coming around for the final quote on Thursday. We indicatively said $100k total because we're doing kitchen laundry bathroom and toilet. so only the most expensive rooms and when I was talking to him last week he said 'that might cover it' and they're seeing cost escalations of 7-10% a week which is just insane. we're not doing anything structural apart from putting in a cavity slider in the bathroom, and the quote they'll give us won't include flooring since they won't do it.
Meanwhile, the prefab homes I were looking at for our site were $425k fully done. Like, I'm not going to spend $130K on doing up my 1940s ex state house ya know? That's not good cost benefit ratio.
So depending on what that comes out at on thursday we'll be able to make some plans.
We also want to start trying for kids next year and need these renos done first - I am not having kids and no dishwasher lol.
Also we need bank financing so good to be in a permanent stable job for that application. the good thing is we have so much equity we know we can borrow whatever we need, I just don't want to spend that much money on it because it's fkn ridiculous. and if I'm going on maternity leave we need to be able to cover it all on dave's salary and whatever benefits I have as well so there;s a lot of financial planning and spreadsheeting going on at the moment lol. it's fab.
either way. we've got plenty of options up our sleeve. we've got friends who's brother owns a building company so we can talk to them, we've got the garage so we can get things prefabricated even if they're not installed til next year, Dave can get shit at cost through his work for whiteware, there;s plenty of things to like cost control we can do, we just need to know where we're starting from basically. thats the challenging part. but we'll figure it out, its just taking longer than I want it to basically.
We also planted up the vege garden for the spring/summer which was lovely, super jazzed about that. we've finally got the garden to a reasonably low maintenance level where everything is mostly under control and it's such a relief, honestly.
PERSONAL
Man what a shift to lockdown last year honestly. I think the last 8 weeks in particular has just been like, a massive reality check of how absolutely shit the last year was and how fucking glad I am to be rid of it. I spent a week absolutely spiralling 2 weeks ago now and honestly, I don't know how I lived in the state for more than a year. I actually don't know how I did it. and I could not be more glad that I'm finally on the other side of it, for the most part. There's still a bunch of other stuff to work through (hahahahahaha when is there not like damn) but fucking hell its nice to just not be anxious and nauseous and wound up constantly. life is actually accessible. miracle.
My workmate had his bebe - I went round and got newborn cuddles and was like, oh, is this what it is to be clucky? this is odd. so there's that as well. I think we'll probably start trying next year pending renos and jobs etc. If the renos can be done in jan I'll prob just stick it at the job to get the benefits but I dunno. it's a tough call to make really. we shall see. This all assumes we get knocked up without any issues which is questionable these days. I really want to feel healthier before getting pregnant as well, and part of that is losing weight. however, given discussing that is what triggered the spiral we're working on that one slowly.
Also, lets have a moment for counselling, because fkn bless anne and all her hard work honestly. I actually ended up emailing her being like, I;m losing my shit on the monday and then talked to her on thursday. And its so funny because it's such a counselling thing but I didn't realise until afterwards what she'd done but she was like you're clearly not doing well and then the night before dave got a fkn miserable migraine and he was up for like, 2 hrs powerchucking except he didn't make it to the bathroom in time so guess who was cleaning up vomit at 130am trying not to chuck herself but I digress. anyway, not doing well, couldn't even explain why, didn't even have words and super tired and she's like, what lynaire up to this week how's she going with izzy and chat about that and then be like how are you feeling about your body and then 5 more mins of chat about the cat and the chickens and then like bam hard question and then hows it going with x and y and z and its like, it wasn't til I was on my walk afterwards when I FINALLY started feeling marginally better I was like damn woman work your magic for figuring it out for me and helping me reregulate. all over the phone as well since we were still in lockdown. GREAT WORK FRIEND.
and then last week was like totally fucked theoretical discussion about religion and the role it's played in my life and fate vs free will and all this nutty shit but genuinely just a great discussion. She's the best and I love her. thank good for good counsellors. thank god I can afford to pay for it honestly.
Dave and I are just chugging along, god bless that man. I love him. its amazing. I miss having friends close by but understand why they had to move (boooooo f u house prices). Family is pretty chill, still not really talking to dave's parents which is nightmarish but we'll deal with that when we need to. gunna have to go and visit them at some point coz dave misses them and I feel for him, I really do. It's the whole boundaries renegotiation I went through with my family last year post wedding blow up and its just not a fun place to be. oh well. can't fix it for him but also I'm not putting up with that level of BS from either of our families once we have children. not gunna happen.
Either way, life is busy and full and fun and I'm enjoying it. Daylight savings starts this weekend too, its october next week WTF and I'm just waiting for 4pm to find out what's gunna happen to our girls trip. Clearly we cancelled our sept trip to christchurch and akaroa and hanmer springs so my covid travel curse continues. fkn ridic. Still dunno what we're gunna do with $2500 of flight credits coz if we get knocked up theres def no international trips happening any time soon.
thus concludes the almost 2000 word write up of life. hope you've enjoyed it. I'll throw up some pics in a separate post if people care about reno plans. such a good time!
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and they were quARANTINED [a beatles fic] - ch 1
summary: George takes a shit. Ringo braves a trip to the tescos and loses a bit of his soul. John harrasses the general public and Paul’s just trying to get them home before they kill each other. All while a virus tears the world apart.
warnings: CRACK (not cocaine), geo’s bad potty habits, ringo’s copious use of emojis
so, this is different... but i’ve always been a crack fic writer at heart. this is the result of being quarantined myself due to COVID-19. i’ve been seeing so much fear and frustration and hatred that i just wanted to write about it kinda cathartically. enjoy!
Unfortunately, George doesn’t realize that they’re out of toilet paper until after he’s taken a shit.
“Fuck,” he mutters. “Ringo?”
No answer.
“Ringooooooooo. RINGO!!!”
George’s legs are starting to lose feeling. He bounces them up and down a bit and the motion almost makes him drop his phone in the toilet.
“RICHARD FUCKING STARKEY!”
There’s the sound of footsteps and then a pause before Ringo answers.
“What’s up?”
“What took you so long?”
“Had my headphones in. Sorry I couldn’t be at your beck and call, O Lord of the Loo.”
“SHUT up. Look, do we have any more loo roll?”
A pause. “Why, are we out?”
George rolls his eyes so hard he sees stars. “No, I’m askin’ for the banter.”
“I’ll go check. Don’t move!”
George can almost see the shit-eating (heh) grin on his mate’s face as he walks away. With a sigh and some choice curse words that would make Louise cry, George pulls out his phone again. Opens Twitter. Sees yet another tweet from that spraytanned clown across the pond. Closes Twitter and contemplates deleting it. After about three rounds of this, Ringo comes back and knocks on the door.
“We’re all out. Got you some tissues, though.”
Krishna help me. George tips his head back against the wall and thumps it a few times for good measure.
“Thanks,” he says flatly. “Could you- ?”
The door opens just a smidge before he can finish talking there’s a flying blur of Kleenex box, a blinding pain in the side of his head, and a sickening crACK—
***
“I’m really sorry,” Ringo says for the millionth time, hovering over George as he examines the spiderweb of cracks on his phone screen. George huffs. He wants to be mad, he really does, but Ringo’s face is doing that stupid thing where his eyes are very, very blue and droopy and his teeth are worrying his bottom lip and it’s obvious that he’s genuinely remorseful and—fuck, he’s got it bad.
“It’s fine,” George insists, even though he can hear his bank account having a fit. “Piece of shit phone, anyway. And look, it still works!” Very shittily, his brain adds, but that’s what you get with a five year old phone.
The older boy’s eyes still have an unconvinced, sad look about them and George wishes he could kiss it away. No homo, though.
“How can I make it up to you?” George’s brain does a slutdrop into the gutter. “I’ll… I’ll get the groceries! How ‘bout that?”
“NO!” Scrambling off the couch, George just barely misses smacking noses with Ringo. “What about the… the virus?”
“I’ll wear a mask and all. Wash hands for twenty seconds, stay six feet away from people… am I missing anything?”
“Yeah, the quarantine bit.”
Ringo snorts and puts a hand on George’s arm. “Quit your worrying, Geo. I’ll be fine. Haven’t John and Paul been out all day?”
***
John and Paul want to go the fuck home. They’d walked all the way to a new art gallery opening only to find out it was cancelled (“Why didn’t you check Google?” “Why didn’t you?”). And now, both being tired as hell from their long trek, they couldn’t even flag down a single cab to take them home.
“This is the worst thing ever,” John cries, flopping his entire body down on a park bench. Paul rolls his eyes and lifts up John’s stupidly long legs so he can sit down as well.
“People are dying, John.”
“I feel like I’m dying.”
“John.”
“Okay, fine, maybe I’m being dramatic. But this stupid… thing… is fucking up all our plans!”
“It’s not fucking Voldemort, you can say the name.”
“Alright, fine. Coronavirus. CORONAVIRUS. You happy, Paul?”
A woman hurrying by shoots them a wide-eyed, nervous look and crosses the street, tugging a little boy by the hand.
“... bitch.”
“Jesus, John.” Paul pinches the bridge of his nose. “I’d do that too if some rando was shouting in the streets.”
“Yeah, but she didn’t hafta shoot that nasty look at us… did you see that? Paul?”
“Hold on, hold on.” His phone is vibrating in his pocket and he fumbles to pull it out. “Your stupid legs are in the way.”
John huffs and makes a show of wiggling said legs, almost kicking Paul in the face. Still, he tucks them to his chest (flexible, Paul thinks and then instantly regrets) so that Paul can take out the buzzing rectangle.
--
bongo: do u or john want anything? 🤔🤔
bongo: like groceries
bongo: going to tescos
Shouldnt you be quarantining?
bongo: ur literally at an art museum 😂
It’s a gallery
And it got cancelled :/
bongo: oop sorry m8 thats tough
bongo: srsly tho whaddaya want
We need more vegetables. Carrots, etc
--
“Tell him to get cornflakes,” John says, peering over Paul’s shoulder. He’s sat up and practically draped over Paul’s lap. Paul sighs and shoves his legs off, ignoring the indignant squawk the other boy makes when he almost falls off the bench.
--
Also that cornflake cereal stuff
bongo: k
bongo: tell john i said hi
Heyyyyyy rich wots up
Paulie’s being a bitch he pushed me :((((
Why is his auto caps on lsdnfol
--
“Give it back!”
“Ow! Ow stop hitting me Jesus fuckin-”
--
Sorry that was john
bongo: yeah i could tell lmao
bongo: where are u guys??
Stuck at some park. Can’t get any cabs home
bongo: well duh coronavirus 😷😷😷
bongo: bad time to be a cabbie man 😔
Yeah yikes
Pick up some rice for george too
And hand sanitizer
bongo: ill try but twitter says handsan itizer is going fast
bongo: what the fuc why did it space like that
Lol
bongo: oh also
bongo: geos being a mother hen and making me wear a face mask
bongo: u know where they are?
Second drawer down in the bathroom, behind the rubber gloves
bongo: … how did u reply SO fast
Uh i know where things are in our flat? Like a normal person?
bongo: thats sus but ok
bongo: wow theyre actually here
bongo: okay imma head out before it gets dark
What’s after dark? Zombies?
bongo: u never no
bongo: *no
bongo: FUCKING *KNOW
Nice
Okay stay safe ritch
bongo: 😘🙃👍🏼✌🏼✌🏼🌈🌟🥦🥦🥦☮️
***
Ringo has never seen this many people at Tesco in his entire life. Two grown men are having a full on argument in the pastries. A harried-looking dad almost knocks Ringo into a rack of Twinkies, pulling along two screaming kids with one slung on his hip. And… is that person actually wearing a Hazmat suit??
“This is insane,” Ringo mutters to himself, slightly muffled due to the face mask. He just needs to find the loo roll and then he’s going to yeet outta here ASAP.
Okay, hygiene aisle… here we g—what the—
The entire aisle is empty.
It’s like a goddamn Old Western. Just add a cow skull… cue the tumbleweed… and it would be perfect.
Not for the first time that day, Ringo sends a prayer to whoever is listening above. There’s got to be something left. He walks down to the end of the aisle. Walks back. Jumps a couple times to check if there’s anything on the top shelf. Sincerely hopes no one just saw him do that. Finally, shoved at the very back behind a couple of Always boxes, Ringo digs out a dusty as shit six-pack of toilet paper.
Well. It’ll have to do.
As he’s walking to the check out lines, a woman drops her bottle of hand sanitizer. It rolls across the floor in a perfect arc and Ringo scoops it up before it can get too far.
“Oops, you dropped this!” He says cheerily, handing it to her. Well, trying to. The woman makes a strangled noise in the back of her throat, physically flinches away from his outstretched hand, and almost drops the rest of her groceries. Before Ringo can react, she’s disappeared behind the produce aisle.
Ringo’s arm falls to his side. He stares at the space where she was just a second ago and holds in a scream.
“More for us, I guess.”
***
By the time Ringo reaches the flat, he’s ready to never see another person again. He trudges right past George in the kitchen, dropping the groceries on the table with a thwack. John hums a greeting to him in the living room and offers him a biscuit.
“No thanks,” Ringo says. He faceplants into the couch.
Something clinks onto the coffee table. Well, coffee table is one way to put it; it’s more of a hunk of stone from back when Paul thought he was going to be the next Michelangelo and get really into classical sculpture. It now sits in the living room and primarily holds George’s textbooks, plus takeout for whenever they don’t feel like cooking (which is all the time), so you can see how that panned out for Paul.
“Tea for you,” George says. He plops onto the floor between the couch and the table and runs a friendly, comforting hand through Ringo’s hair. Ringo practically purrs, leaning into the touch, and George feels his heart melt and trickle through his ribs. “You okay?”
“I’ve lost all faith in humanity,” Ringo mumbles into the cushion. John reaches over and pats him on the back.
“Don’t worry, Ringo. There won’t be any humans to have faith in soon.”
George throws a packet of sugar at John who dodges it, snickering. Ringo groans and tries to sink even deeper into the couch.
And that’s when they hear Paul scream.
#mclennon#starrison#mclennon fanfic#starrison fanfic#john lennon x paul mccartney#george harrison x ringo starr#beatles fanfic#beatles crackfic#kalwrites#idk
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Everything to love about Far From Home not in this order:
Literally seeing that opening with all our loved avengers that are no more.
Whitney Houston “I will always love you” made me cry because damnit Tony’s face was right THERE! NOT OK!
The blip footage was pretty damn funny not gonna lie.
Peter’s cute ass plan to tell MJ how he feels.
MJ’s favorite flower being a Black Dalia because of the murder. Literally a girl I can relate too. Murderinos for life sister. Idk but it just made her sooo relatable!
The fact that Brad is a kid grown up from the blip and that made him seem all the weirder for MJ.
Jealous Peter was so freaking amazing! Oh my gosh! That face he’d get. I’m a sucker for jealousy and they did it so good.
Making MJ this awesome character she was before but also obviously has this softer layer where she does have flaws and insecurities and she’s really sweet but also so badass. That was amazing.
The starting relationship between Peter and Beck. It was cute and so I was sad knowing that Beck was somehow going to be the villain.
Also let’s talk about how Beck is basically Syndrom from the incredibles.
That scene with Peter and Brad....the pure terror when he snapped that picture
Also seeing how big of a dick Brad is and how unhealthy jealous he was.
“Nick Fury” getting ghosted, showing up in Venice, tranquilising Ned (don’t touch him you monster) and then promptly highjacking Peters Summer trip.
Showing the emotional trama Peter is going through. The anxiety, the greiving. It was very reminiscent of Iron Man 3 when Tony suffers from PTSD after the battle of New York. I loved that they showed Peter reacting as any kid would, many adults too, which is to just try and forget anything happened but being faced with the reality every day. So well done.
Happy and May’s relationship. Enough said 😂😂
I feel cheated we didn’t see Mr delmore again.
Addressing all the problems the Blip/Snap created. High school aging, school, drinking ages, homelessness and housing issues. That’s just the start of it I’m sure but they covered those pretty well and I love that.
The technology that made Beck into Misterio was so well done. Instead of some frankly, kinda far fetched story that he came from an alternate earth (which I was willing to believe but felt it was a cop out in terms of plot and character) they showed the real world issues that superhero’s can create. The Enemies that have a real deep rooted hatred for hero because they’ve personally been betrayed or wronged by them. Because marvel has always made clear, everyone is not on the hero’s side.
Steeping Misterio’s powers in tech which is classing marvel but again, so brilliantly done in this movie. I loved the development. Because at first glance, half way through, I was thinking “wow this is really kinda weird and unexplained and too witchcraft for what marvel usually brings to the superpower backstory” I know it’s weird to say after everything marvel has done. But it seemed just a tad out there without being too hard to grasp. Which again was brilliantly done because that was the whole point.
The nod to Misterio’s helmet even when Beck was in the hologram suit watching everything play out. I guess it was his screen? But I loved the staple of even without his big over the top suit he still had the trademark helmet. Great costume design.
Peter’s soft gazes towards MJ. Nearly gave me a cavity they were so sweet! Ahhh sooo cute
Mr. Harrington’s marital problems nearly made me pee my pants....we all knew here in the fandom that shit like that would half to happen but my god lol
The opera scene was sooo freakin cute and that one step Peter took when he saw Brad move in was so freaking cute and hot!
MJ running after him and finding the critical peice of information to crack the case wide open. Loved it.
Betty and Ned’s Sicily sweet romance that you knew couldn’t possibly last. They really nailed the realistic high school romance. But I still ship it.
The bus scene was epic. And when Peter knocked Flash out...god it was amazing.
Mj obviously having love eyes towards Peter same as he does for her.
THE FACT THAT HE ACTUALLY BOUGHT THAT NECKLACE FOR HER OH MY GOD! I CANT GET A GUY TO TEXT ME BACJ LET ALONE BUY A NECKLACE LIKE THAT WHICH PROBABALY COST A GOOD CHUNK OF CHANGE IT WAS SO FREAKING AMAZING AND CUTE AND TOUCHING.
All the iron man images got me feeling depressed as hell
“are you being serious because I was only like 67% sure?” That was amazing. Seeing MJ get so excited and trying to keep that hidden was awesome
The fact that she was so pleased with herself but also played it hella cool when Ned walked in and she said she figured it out. Literally that is me.
The shirtless Peter trope that we all wanted and freaking got! So freaking cute how she tried to peak at his abs. Like understandable girl.
The fucking illusions. Turning our sweet trusting Peter into a ball of mess. I was too.
God when he had to tell himself it wasn’t real but it still totally feels like it is.
Him trying to save MJ when she’s “thrown off the Eiffel Tower”
Every traumatizing thing Beck shows and tells him during the illusion. So shitty.
Seeing Tony’s grave, seeing iron man come out. That was awful and we all felt it in the movie because we’ve lost him too. We could FEEL that slap same as Peter.
Beck telling Peter that Tony’s death was his fault. I was abouta hurl myself at the movie screen.
Every illusion done in a way that just when you think it’s over, it’s never stopped. You forget what’s real and you feel trapped in it same as Peter does.
WHEN HE GETS HIT BY THE TRAIN!!!!!!!!!! Nearly had a damn heart attack!!!! My mom had to look over and ask if I was ok because I literally stopped breathing for a solid 30 seconds.
Showing gradually just how insane and evil Misterio was.
HAPPY BEING CONCERNED FOR PETER! LIKE SINCERELY AND HONESTLY CONCERNED! It’s good to know he’s got Happy to take care of him and May but that Peter still has a father type figure he can count on after Tony. Because you know Tony wouldn’t have put up with any of that getting hit by a train shit.
Also where the hell was Karen? We missed her. We got Edith but Karen wouldn’t have let Misterio take her over. WHERE WAS KAREN!!
Peter crying and needing to know Happy was real. Broke me heart
That hug between them was so sweet and you can see the concern on Happy’s face
Happy and Peter opening up to each other was so awesome considering their relationship in Homecoming.
ALL THE TONY and PETER PARRELLS! All of them!!!!!!!!! Not the people saying “Spider-Man’s the next Ironman” no the actual hints and glimpses at how similar him and tony actually are. The hologram gauntlet shot, a straight parallel to Iron Man when Tony is building his first real suit. Obviously “Back in Black” by Led Zeplen (formally known as AC/DC) playing. Another obvious hint toward Tony. The Stark sunglasses. Peter falling with the parachute and it literally looks like Ironman with his jet stream behind him from a distance. There’s so much more I’ll do a whole other post on.
Of course: “I love Led Zeplin!” Hahaha it’s such a kid thing to say! I’ve said it before I knew the big differences between AC/DC and Led Zeplin. It was so freaking perfect.
Peter making his suit and Happy’s face. Bittersweet and I live for the affection he holds for Peter now.
The Netherlands Holding cell...must I say more?
Brad’s downfall and MJs amazing comment about him taking pictures of people in the bathroom. Ep-ic. Even flash was like “bro that’s so weird”
Mr. witchcraft was hilarious and I loved his aside with Brad “I’m gonna be the cool teacher and tell you you can’t do that anymore.”
Flash is definately Gay or Bi and I’m so here for it. That wink he makes to Peter proves it.
All the near death truths in the vault of the tower.
MJ BADDASS COMES SWINGING WITH THE MACE AND IT WAS LEGINDARY OH MY GOD! YES GIRL! She’s my idol I love her so much.
Peter and his “Peter Tingle” And while we’re on the subject the banana he gets to the face while packing.
Important. His amazing skills at the end trusting his instincts (which is great because May says in regards to MJ, but it applies to this too) May tells Peter to trust his instincts and don’t think too much. And that’s what he does when he defeats Beck.
The bad ass “you can’t fool me anymore” after redirecting the gun away from his head at the end. Literally was so intense and well done.
Peter and MJ’s kisses! I loved how awkward it was at first and the slightly less awkward one. They really accurately captured the awkwardness of teenagers in love. Like that’s what it’s like guys.
Show me MJ’s parents you cowards, or show me something. Anything. I just want to know the nature of the situation.
Ned and Betty’s breakup. So funny and honestly not surprising at all. But still I ship them.
The hand hold. So cute.
May and Peter still being the cutest aunt and nephew duo there ever was.
I totally thought Peter was going to end with telling the world he was spiderman....BUT SOME OTHER ASSHOLES DID IT FOR HIM AND MADE HIM INTO A VILLAN AND IM PISSED. LOOKING AT YOU MR JAMESON YOU PEICE OF SHIT.
The movie ended and I have no idea what’s next.
Mid credit of MJ swinging through New York. Home girl doesn’t like and neither do I. Looks full on terrifying we don’t blame you hun.
After credit where the skrulls have been playing Maria and Nick fury for the whole movie. Honestly it made more sense because Nick fury seemed just a bit off. ALSO WHERE IS THE REAL NICK FURY at and I’m so psyched to see where this new movies are gonna go!
Alright that all for now folks!!!! Everything about the movie was great!!! I will have to watch again ad see if anything more pops up. Sorry for any spelling errors I’m on my phone.
#peter parker#marvel#spiderman#mcu#michelle jones#spideychelle#spider-man#spider-man: homecoming#avengers#tony stark#ned leeds#spiderman far from home#spider man: far from home#far from home spoilers#spoilers
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Sanctuary - Chapter 29
Warnings: some violence
Tagging: @innerpaperexpertcloud, @alievans007, @c-a-v-a-l-r-y, @thorsbathroomchicken, @valkyrie-of-the-light
If you can, please leave even the smallest comment so I know someone is reading lol <3
“I thought you said you knew how to do this?” Esme whispers, as she nervously bounces up and down on her heels, arms crossed over her chest, hands vigorously rubbing her shoulders in a vain attempt to warm herself up. Enormous poplars tower over either end of the McMann's front porch, effectively blocking out the sun and bringing a chill to the air.
“I do,” Yaz responds, as he uses a picking tool to manipulate the lock on the front door. He'd already used a high tech blocker to jam the security system; once inside no alarm would sound and no police or security would be alerted to their activity. “It just takes time.”
“It's been fifteen minutes. If there's anyone watching, they're going to see us.”
“If there is anyone watching, they would have seen us by now. I can't believe you even talked me into this.”
“I was getting tired of waiting around for Nik to make up her mind about whether she wanted us to check the place out or not. What's with her dragging her heels? We are running out of time. Those kids are running out of time. We need information, Yaz. It's not going to fall into our laps.”
“I thought you were going to get information tomorrow. On your date.”
“It is not a date. It's a ruse. To get what I what. This clock is ticking. We don't have time to fuck around. Those kids have been missing for two weeks. And you know as well as I do, that they're on borrowed time. So it's time to pull out all the stops. Go big or go home.”
'Tyler's going to flip his shit, you know that, right?”
“Tyler is a big boy that realizes that we need to get the show on the road. And that sometimes means making....uncomfortable...decisions.”
“You really think he's going to be okay with his wife going out on a date with some random guy?”
“Again, it's not a date. I'm using this person to get information. Information we all desperately need, I might add. This is the only way I'm going to get it, Yaz. And it's messed up and it's weird and it's going to get incredibly awkward. But this has to be done. He's got names. People who have way more clout and info than he does. We are so close to finding out just who has those kids and where they are.”
“You're crazy if you think Tyler is going to go along with this. I wouldn't if I was in his shoes. I wouldn't want my wife putting herself out there like that. Pretending she's single, flirting with other men, having dinner and drinks with them.”
“It's for the job. He's not going to feel threatened over some two bit hood that I have to con to get info out of. He's forty years old, Yaz. He's far beyond being the jealous and irrational type.”
He smirks. “You keep telling yourself that.” There's an audible 'click' as the lock finally gives way, and he shoots her a victorious grin as he turns the handle and pushes the door open, holding it for her and gesturing for to step inside first.
“Oh so it can be me the attack dogs come after first,” she teases, slapping him playfully across the chest before stepping into the foyer. “Not too shabby,” she gives a nod of approval as she surveys the polished marble tiles, cove ceilings, and rich cherry wood accents. “I didn't picture McMann as the type to have wainscotting and antiques. He seems more like the leather and chrome type. Look...” she picks up a small knick-knack from the hallway table; a small porcelain figurine of a young boy with his dog. “...he even has Hummels! Talk about someone being a total mind fuck! Total study in contradiction, don't you think?”
“How do you even know what Hummels are? You don't seem like the type to collect frilly and pretty shit.”
“My grandmother used to collect them. She had a whole china cabinet full of them. She used to threaten to beat our asses if even dared step a single toe in the living room where they were kept. She was the type that had plastic on the couches and fancy hand towels in the bathroom that no one was allowed to touch. Oooo...look...mail,” she picks up a stack of envelopes from the table. “Let's snoop.”
“What are we exactly looking for?” Yaz asks, as they fall in step alongside of each other, curiously watching as she thumbs through the stack of mail, then selects a handwritten letter bearing a New Zealand postal stamp.
“Anything and everything,” she tears into the envelope, plucking the stiff writing paper out from its confines, carefully opening it. “Fancy,” she releases a low, impressed whistle. “Someone doesn't realize the art of good penmanship and snail mail died a long time ago. This has to be from an older relative. Someone still hanging onto the past. Maybe Heather's grandmother?”
“Maybe. What's it say?”
“It's about the business. Maybe the grandmother's shop? The one where she was helping Heather hide out from her father? Where McMann found her? There's no name of the place or an address. The letter is personal. Nothing business like about it. All about how sad it is that the end of the era has come and how the writer wishes things could have been different. But they accept the decision and won't contact them again. It's signed Nan.”
“Definitely the grandmother.” Yaz concludes.
“We'll take it with us,” Esme says, and then pauses before she slips it into her purse. Then drops all of the envelopes inside. “We'll talk all of them, actually.”
“You don't think he's going to realize his mail is missing?”
“Who cares. Let him think he's gone crazy and tear the place apart looking for it. Let's start upstairs and work our way down.”
“You seem to enjoying this a little too much,” Yaz comments, as he follows her up the spiral staircase, loose floorboards sagging and creaking under their feet. “Were you a cat burglar at some point in your old life?”
“No,” she laughs. “I just get a perverse satisfaction out of snooping through peoples' shit and finding out the skeletons in their closet. Especially people like this. The ones who have the fancy house and the fancy cars and the designer clothes. The ones that look so perfect on the outside yet have the most twisted shit going on behind closed doors.”
“So about this date...”
She sighs.
“Sorry...about this 'non date'. You honestly think Tyler is going to be okay with it? That you're going to let some IRA dude wine and dine you?”
“First all, I think you need to stop worrying about what goes on between Tyler and I. Our marriage is good, Yaz. It's beyond good. It's amazing. We love each other and want to spend the rest of our lives together and totally intend on doing just that. We have four amazing kids. If we've managed to get through the past five and a half years, this bullshit with Michael McMann isn't going to break us.”
“But you're pretending like your single. You're flirting with this bartender. You agreed to go out with him.”
“It's for the job,,” she reminds him. “There's nothing scandalous going on. It is strictly business. I'm not running off to cheat on my husband. This isn't committing adultery. This is lying and conning someone into giving us what we want. What we need. And Tyler is going to understand that. Any rational human being would.”
“You realize that he isn't exactly understanding and rational when it comes to you, right? You realize it drives him batshit insane if another guy so as much looks as you when you're with him? He doesn't even like me checking you out.”
“You've been checking me out?”
“It's kind of hard not to. At the risk of sounding like a pervert, you're kind of hard not to notice. I so would have scooped you up if you weren't into tall, buff, Australian dudes. I'm just saying that this is a horrible idea. You hooking up with this bartender. It can be done another way. Getting information. Why risk pissing Tyler off and causing issues between you guys?”
“He isn't going to be pissed off. He's a professional.”
“He's also your husband. Maybe he'd be okay with it if it was just some girl off the street Nik brought in. But you guys have history. You're his wife. And no husband is going to like the idea of his wife being with another man. Whether it's for business or not. Doesn't he at least get a say in this?”
“What he is going to say?”
“That you're insane and there's no way he's letting you do it.”
“I admit, when I tell him, he may get a little upset...”
Yaz stares at her pointedly.
“Okay so he may get very upset. But when he calms down, he'll realize that it's for the best. That things like this have to be done from time to time. I'm going to have a dinner and a couple drinks and I'm going to get the info we need. I'm not running off with some strange man to cheat on my husband. Give me some credit, would you? Sheesh. You don't really think that about me do you? That I'd do that to Tyler?”
“I don't think you would. I know you're crazy about the guy. But this is some serious shit you're wadding into. This guy is IRA. Not just a bartender. A bartender that's in a terrorist organization. And you're walking right into his bullshit. This is crazy. You know it is. And I agree that we need information, but...”
“You check the master bedroom,” she suggests. “I'll hit up the kids' rooms”
He captures her by the wrist before she can walk away. “Esme, I'm just worried about you, okay? This is some scary shit we're all getting into it. You're my friend. Tyler's my friend. I don't want to see this screwing things up for you guys. You two have a great thing. He has a normal life. A wife and kids. A house. All the things he'd never thought he'd have, you gave him. And I don't want to see all that fucked up because of this Michael McMann bullshit. Just promise me you'll hear him out. When you tell him about tomorrow night. Don't just ignore what he has to say. Because I don't think you realize just how much he loves you. How much it would kill him to lose you. To lose what he has.”
“I'm not going anywhere, Yaz. I plan to stick around. For a very long time. Or least until you end up killing me for making jokes at your expense.”
He grins at that.
“Tyler knows I love him. He knows that I would do anything for him. I'm not going to let anyone screw my life up. I've worked too hard at this and put too much work into my marriage...into my family...to let the job mess that up. I promise.”
“Good,” he says, and then playfully tousles her hair. “Now lets get to work.”
****
McMann is already waiting for the them at the scheduled, a long abandoned school on the outskirts of town. A one story sprawling building; faded and chipped red bricks, broken and missing windows, weeds and grass to the knees, industrial sized dumpsters filled the brim. The area itself is a disaster; most of the houses empty and boarded up, junk of various shapes and sizes filling the yards of the tenants who still remain. A foul stench hangs in the air; rotting trash, pollution from the factories only blocks away, the smell of mould and mildew that comes with years of neglect and decay.
“That's him?” Mark mutters as they approach, McMann watching them with narrow, darkened eyes, taking one last, long drag of his cigarette before tossing it aside.
Tyler nods. “Just remember what I told you. Just go with it.”
“Who the hell is this? McMann barks. “You're supposed to be alone. What the hell kind of shit are you trying to pull, Rake?”
“I was just going to ask you the same thing,” he retorts, and before McMann can get out another word, Tyler is grabbing a hold of the front of his t-shirt and slamming his forearm into his throat; using his height and weight advantage to shove the startled man into the side of one of the dumpsters. The back of his head slamming off the metal with an echoing thud.
“What the fuck?!” McMann roars. “What the fuck do you think you're doing? Are you fucking crazy? What is wrong with you? We had a deal!”
“Everything you told me was a goddamn lie,” Tyler snarls. “Right from the very beginning. Right from the fucking start you've been bullshitting me. Playing me. You didn't think I'd find out? You didn't think I had ways of looking into you and figuring out what you're up to?”
“I don't know what you're talking about. I don't...”
He increases the pressure of his forearm; leaning into the other man. Until McMann is coughing and sputtering and his face turning a vivid shade of red. “Don't lie to me,” Tyler hisses. “If there was ever the time to tell the truth, this would be it.”
“You're crazy,” McMann manages through the gagging; spit rolling down the sides of his mouth, sweat beading across his forehead. His eyes wide with a mixture of fury and terror. “You're fucking crazy. I was warned about you. How unhinged you are.”
“I haven't even got to the point of being unhinged. I know about your little plan. All the bullshit you spewed to get me here. Away from my family. You wanted me alone. You thought it would make me vulnerable. You thought you'd be able to get the drop on me.”
“I have no idea what you're talking about you. You!” he barks the last word at Mark, who stands idly by with his hands shoved in his pockets, enjoying the exchange. “Do something would ya? Get him off of me!”
“No,” Mark says, and casually leans against one of the brick walls. “I don't think I will.”
“Your little friend showed up at my hotel,” Tyler continues. “What is she? Your little girlfriend? Your side piece?”
“What girl? Who...”
“She gave me the pictures. The pictures of your wife and your kids. The proof of life. And she gave me the pictures of my family. Of my wife, my kids. Didn't I warn you not to fuck with my family? Didn't I tell you it was the worst possible thing that you could do? Go after my wife and my kids? That I would kill you if you even thought about it?”
“I swear...” McMann claws at Tyler's forearm, struggles in vain to get away from the strong, solid body keeping him in place. “...I don't know what you're talking about...”
“Tell me the truth,” Tyler orders. “All of it. Or I will snap your neck right here and now and I'll leave you here to rot.”
“I have no idea what you're talking about!” he insists, his skin turning a hideous shade of purple, blood vessels popping in his eyes. And with his free hand he reaches up to grab a hold of Tyler's hair; yanking and twisting it.
“You stupid fucker!” Tyler roars; the act dissipating, the rage suddenly all too real.
That simple and desperate act of violence and retaliation against him sends him over the edge. Five and a half years of pent up anger and frustration. The confusion he'd felt during those months in the hospital and all through those long and tedious days of rehab and wondering if he'd ever been even half the man he once was. The guilt that he carried around over what he had put Esme through; her fight to keep him alive on the bridge, the nights she'd spent sleeping beside his hospital bed, the animosity she'd felt towards him for having pushing her into a life she didn't want. The lingering fear that he'll lose her. That she'll disappear from his life just as quick as she entered it. Leaving him broken and alone and raising four kids by himself. He wouldn't survive. He knows it. He'd turn to the booze and the meds again and his life would fall apart and then he'd no longer even have his children.
His forearm slips from McMann's throat and his hand wraps around his throat. Knuckles cracking and turning white from the pure, brute force that he uses. Nostrils flaring. Chest heaving from a mixture of rage and exertion. Eyes dark and crazed. The eyes of a predator that has managed to catch his prey and will show no mercy.
“All right...” Mark is stepping alongside of him now. “....take it easy....take it down a notch...this isn't what we came for...”
“You fucking lied to me,” Tyler's voice is low, menacing. Fingers pressing further into McMann's throat. “I told you to leave my family out of it. I told you to stay away from my wife and my kids. And now they're caught up in this bullshit. Your bullshit. And if anything happens to my wife because of you...”
“Hey...hey...” Mark lays a hand on Tyler's arm. “...look at me, kid....look at me...”
Tyler inhales sharply, breath slowly leaving his lungs and his lips, turning those furious blue eyes on Mark's concerned hazel ones.
“Nothing is going to happen to her, okay? She's going to be fine. She's safe. With you. Now just take it down a notch. This isn't what we came here for. Step back, take a breath, and get your shit together. Understand me?”
Tyler just stares at him. Just heaving. Fingers finally beginning to relax around McMann's throat.
“You kill him and then what?” Mark asks. “You kill him, you don't get what you want. You need whatever information he has. He dies, those kids die. And you know that. That's not what you want, Tyler. You don't want the blood of those kids on your hands. So take a step back and calm down, you hear me?
He finally relents. Hand relaxing and falling off of McMann's throat, stepping back as the man's body collapses to the ground in front of him.
“Just take it easy...” Mark encourages, and rubs his shoulders in the same way a manager would do a boxer in between rounds. “....just take a few deep breaths and take it easy...”
Tyler rakes his hands through his hair; then bends at the waist, hands resting on his thighs. Eyes closed as he struggles to regain his composure. Sucking in long, shaky breaths. Releasing them slowly. Until he feels all of his muscles begin to relax; the rage and the tension disappearing first from his shoulders, then spreading down his arms and his arms.
“You stupid sonofabitch,” McMann gasps for air as he struggles into a sit, back against the dumpster. “Do you know who you're messing with? Do you know the people I know? The people I'm involved with? What they could do to you? To your family?”
“Shut your goddamn mouth,” Mark snarls. “I've calmed him down once. I won't be able to again. Keep his family out of this. If you know what's good for you. You good?” he pats Tyler on the back. “You think you can hold it together long enough to get some information out of this prick?”
He nods, heaving a sigh as he stands up. “I'm good.”
“What kind of information?” McMann asks, eyes narrowed as Tyler approaches him. “I've already told you everything I know.”
“You lied to me, mate. Right off the hop. You told me that your wife was a shop keeper in New Zealand. That she was feeding you information while you were there for a job. I know that's all shit. I know who she is. I know who her family is. Who her father was. You were working for him. He hired you to extract her. She was a kid. She was a fucking kid and you took advantage of her. She was weak and vulnerable and you were responsible for her and you preyed on her, you sick fuck.”
“We fell in love,” he tries to reason. “I never forced her into anything. It was mutual.”
“She was a teenager! She was seventeen and you took advantage of her. What the hell is wrong with you? You were thirty three. You were supposed to protect her. Bring her home to her father. She was vulnerable and she trusted you and you took advantage of that. For that alone I should break your fucking neck. We both have daughters. Would you want that for your daughter? I sure as hell don't. And if someone like you ever even so as much looks at my daughter the wrong way. I'll do shit to them that they couldn't even begin to imagine in their worst dreams.”
“She was almost an adult,” McMann continues. “She wasn't a child. She was...”
“I know about everything,” Tyler says. “I know that you started taking jobs for friends of her old man. That you'd take the money and not get the work done. I also know that you killed him.” He's taking a shot in the dark with the last part; there's no proof that McMann is the one that did the hit himself. Or had one put on his father in law.
“He knew too much. About me being part of the IRA. I told him I left and he found out I didn't and he was going to try and convince Heather to take the kids and leave.”
“You're still part of them?” Mark inquires. “The IRA?”
“No. I did leave. Two years ago. I have nothing to do with them now.”
“Why'd you lie about who has your wife and your kids?” Tyler asks. “We know it's not the IRA. They deny having anything to do with it. They won't claim responsibility. Why'd you tell me it was them? Do you realize what could have happened? If I'd just come in here believing what you said and caused all kinds of shit with them? How bad things would have gotten? You wanted me to take the fall for you, didn't you. You wanted me to come here and blow shit up and take a bullet for you. To cover up who's actually behind all of this. You were willing to have me killed to cover your shit up.”
McMann nods.
“Who has them?” Mark asks. “Who has your wife and your kids?”
“Her family,” he replies. “The Buckmans.”
“Whose in charge?” Tyler inquires. “Of the family? Is it your wife?”
“I can't...I can't tell you that. You have to understand. If I tell you everything...”
“Is your wife in charge?” Tyler presses, and takes a step closer. “Don't fuck me around here, mate. You've lied to me enough. So unless you want me snapping your neck for good this time...”
“I'm not sure. I'm not sure she's involved. At first I thought she was innocent in all of this. That she was just as innocent as the kids. And then things started not adding up. The more and more I thought about it, things didn't make sense.”
“Why? Why would she do it? Why would she do that to her own kids?”
“Revenge?” McMann suggests with a shrug. “For what I did to her father.”
“And because you've been sticking your dick where it doesn't belong?” Mark smirks. “Yeah, we know about that too. You're just one big shit show, aren't you.”
“Where are they?” Tyler asks. “Where are your wife and kids?”
“That I don't know. I honestly do not know. I've got both of them after me . The IRA. The Buckmans.”
“Well you're well and truly fucked aren't you, mate. And I'd give a shit if you didn't go after my family. Was it you? That sent that girl? Erin? Was it you that had someone take pictures of my wife and my kids?”
“No. I had nothing to do with that. I'd have no reason to do that. I needed you here. To help.”
“No. You needed me here to start a whole bunch of shit. And die in the process. Then shit really hit the fan with your wife and your kids and you realized you did need me alive. That you needed me to do your dirty work. Because you're a coward. A fucking coward that preys on young girls. You were never going to try and get your wife and your kids back, were you. You were going to leave that all to me.”
“I'm not like you,” McMann says. “I can't do the things you do. I can't turn it off. The emotions.”
“And you think I can? You think I like doing this? You think I like having to kill people? I do it because I have to. Because I have no other choice. Because it's me or them. Because I have a family that needs me and going home in a body bag isn't an option.”
“Where are they?” Mark asks. “The kids.”
“I told you. I don't know. I'm not in on this. I have nothing to do with this. I would never do something like that. To my own kids. I do need your help,” he turns pleading eyes up at Tyler. “I do need you to find them. To get them out. You're the only one that can do it.”
“And if I was to leave right now?” Tyler asks “If I was to just say 'fuck it' and leave? What then?”
“You wouldn't be able to live with yourself,” McMann replies. “You have kids of your own. And every time you would look at them, you'd think about the kids you left behind. To die.”
Tyler gives a derisive snort. “Let's go,” he says to Mark, and then turns on his heel to head for the car. “We're done here.”
“Don't you fucking walk away!” McMann roars, as he struggles to his feet. “Don't you bail on me, Rake! Don't you bail on my kids!”
“I'll find your kids,” Tyler assures him. “Just as long as you stay the fuck out of my way.”
*****
The McMann house is eerily quiet; nothing but the soft hum of the central air conditioning filling the air. Outside is just as still; no breeze tousling the tree tops, no sounds of children playing in nearby yards or cars on the street. The sky gray and dreary; an imminent threat of rain.
Esme scours the little girl's room; the boy's had turned up nothing out of the ordinary and it had left her frustrated and feeling helpless. One moment it felt as if they were getting closer to finding out their whereabouts, the next it seemed as if they were taking a hundred steps backwards.
The room is the quintessential girls room. A white wood canopy bed with a billowing sheer panels; white with delicately embroidered pink and purple flowers around the edges. An obviously handmade quilt boasting panels displaying rainbows, unicorns and other mythical creatures. The hardwood floor covered in places by impossibly soft bubble gum pink shag throw rugs, a wall to wall bookcase filled with the little one's favourites and a wide selection of stuffed animals. A desk in one corner; covered with drawers and loose markers and crayons. A towering dollhouse in the other; filled with every possible kind of decor and furniture and several different Barbies.
She searches the closet; flipping through hangers of clothing. Mostly dresses; all flowing and made from expensive fabrics and boasting rich, vibrant colours. A handful of more casual items; jeans, a few t-shirts, a couple of zip up sweaters. And she sticks her arm in as far as it will go; blindly feeling along the walls for any shelving or even tucked away spaces and corners that could be used as hiding spots.
Nothing.
Sighing, she closes the closet door and journeys to the dresser. Fingertips tracing along the various toys and small figurines that sit on top of it. Unicorns the current favourite; ceramic ones that have been hand painted, others made from glass, a couple constructed of heavy crystal, two with multi-coloured flowing manes and tails. There's a hair brush and a handheld mirror; antique by the looks of it, likely passed on through generations. A small jewellery box that when opened, held a spinning ballerina and played a soft lullaby.
And suddenly the emotions hit. Raw and powerful. Thoughts of her own little girl. Of Millie and her brilliant blue eyes and her light brown hair done up in braids. Of that bedroom back in Colorado that boasts all the little touches that make Millie the spirited and beautiful five year old that she is; the paintings she'd done on her own and insisted be framed and hung, the fleece Winnie the Pooh blanket that she'd been given as a baby by a neighbour in the old apartment; it was tattered and faded yet she still insisted that it be kept at the foot of her bed. Family pictures on her dresser; even ones of her brothers who she was adamant she hated, yet always told them she loved them before bed. And that stuffed koala; the one that her daddy had given her when she was only an hour old and had been tagging along with them everywhere they went. He was missing one eye now; his fur wasn't as soft and it had lost most of its colour. But he is treasured and well loved.
The tears come now. Hot. Bitter. The realization of just how desperately she misses her family. Just how far away they actually are. How messed up things are and how there's a very real chance that she may never see them again. Or, at the very least, be returning as a single parent.
She flees the room; nearly knocking Yaz clear off his feet as he exits the master across the hall. And she's barely aware of him calling her name and asking what's wrong; tears blurring her vision and burning her cheeks, chest heaving with sobs as she rushes down the stairs. She feels as if she can't breathe. She's nauseous. Dizzy. Desperate for escape.
She's sitting on the front steps when the door opens behind her. Clearing the tears off her cheeks with one hand, the other rubbing at her bare arms. She's tired. Emotionally and physically. The stress and the worry and the overwhelming loneliness just too much to bear. And Yaz doesn't say a word. Just silently slips out of his jacket and drapes it over her shoulders before taking a seat on the top step beside her.
“Anything?” she asks after several minutes, thankful that he hadn't asked questions or pressured her to tell her what was wrong. Just sitting there in silence; a comforting, friendly presence.
“There's no women's clothes,” he replies. “In the closet. Or any of the dressers. No things belonging to a woman in any of the bathrooms.”
“This just gets weirder and weirder,” Esme sighs. “McMann said that his kids and his wife were both taken. On the same day. But if there's no sign she was even here...”
“Maybe she came back and got her things.”
“Which would mean she's not being held. That she's free to come and go as she pleases. And no captor or captors are going to allow that.”
“Which points towards the idea that she's involved.”
Esme nods.
“Are you okay?” he asks. “You've been a little weird the last couple of days.”
“You call me weird three hundred and sixty five days a year. What makes the last couple any different?”
“You're even weirder than usual,” he teases, and playfully leans into her. “I'm serious. You've been acting all out of sorts. Are you okay?”
“No,” she admits with a shake of her head. “I'm not.”
“You wanna talk about it or...”
“I miss home. I miss the kids. I miss my life. The one I had before all of this. Before Michael McMann showed up.”
“You'll get that back,” Yaz assures her. “We're getting closer.”
“How can you say that? We have nothing. If seems like with every two steps we take forward, we take ten backwards.”
“I can just feel it,” he says. “I can just feel that we're close. To something. We should get going. We should really be back at the hotel before Tyler gets there. He's going to wonder where the hell we went if we're not there. And I don't know if we should be telling him about this.”
Esme rests the side of her head against his shoulder. “Our little secret?”
“Our little secret,” he confirms.
“Think they'd mind if I used their bathroom? Those two extra large teas on the way here practically have my eyeballs swimming.”
He laughs at that. “You want me to wait here or go start the car or....”
“Just wait here. In case someone does see us here and decides to pop in for a visit.”
She steps back into the house, hurrying for the small three piece bathroom that she'd seen when they'd first started their search of the house. While in there, she finds a bottle of anti nausea meds in the medicine and takes three; swallowing them down with a palm full of water and then hurrying out to meet Yaz.
She is three feet from the door when she sees it. Out of the corner of her eye. The corner of an ornate cherry wood dining table behind a set of French doors. And when she slips into the room for a closer look, she frowns at the odd sight of only five chairs instead of the usual six.
The chair, she thinks.
The one that Heather Buckman was bound to. The one with the unusual carvings on the legs and the back and the very distinct cushion; burgundy with silver and gold flecks.
The one that matches the five still remaining in the room.
Her hands are shaking as she pulls her SAT from the pocket of her jeans. A sudden rush of adrenaline and the resurgence of hope causing the tremors. And she snaps a picture of one of the chairs before composing a text to Tyler and sending it to his phone.
WE FOUND SOMETHING.
#Tyler Rake#tyler rake fan fic#tyler rake fan fiction#extraction#chris hemsworth character#sanctuary
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I leave the bathroom, holding my backpack with Jennie’s dress that I was far too cold in scrunched up inside it, and I instantly spot Jimin sat alone at a booth in the corner of the room, watching the others dance and mess around with a fond smile on his face. I head over to him, my heart full and a smile breaking across my face at the sight of him, and when he spots me coming, he smiles too, eyes hiding behind their lids. He slides across to let me in and I sit beside him, taking a sip of a fresh drink that a waiter puts down before me. ‘I’m gonna really miss you, you know?’ he says, and I frown in confusion, putting my drink back down. ‘What do you mean?’ I ask, and he smiles sadly. ‘This is it. Tour’s done. We might do a couple little promotional things once the album’s out, but that’ll be it. We probably won’t work together after that, nor with the Blackpink girls. It’ll be straight back to Dynasty, Viridity, Serenity, Blackpink and y/n, and we’ll all be working on our own stuff again. No more Rose Tour gang,’ he says, and I shake my head. ‘No, Jimin. I’m signing with Bighit in the next few days. I put it on the groupchat a little while ago, didn’t you see?’ I say, and his eyes widen as I speak. ‘No way!’ he says. ‘Jimin! You didn’t even see it?’ I exclaim, and he shakes his head sheepishly. ‘I saw about the Blackpink girls maybe signing, but I mustn’t have read the messages properly because I didn’t see you say that,’ he says, and I roll my eyes jokingly.
‘Are they going to sign, do you know? I’ve forgotten to ask about it,’ he says, and I sigh. ‘I spoke to some of the Bighit managers and they said that the only way it’d be possible is if the Blackpink girls each paid YG the amount that YG paid them in the first place, but it’s a very high price for each of them. Bighit said the way they’d be able to do it is to give the girls the money to pay YG and then Blackpink are automatically a Bighit artist, but then the issue is whether or not there are legal complications with that so that’s what’s being looked into at the moment. It also means that the girls will no longer have ownership of their music or brand or name or anything anymore,’ I say, and Jimin whistles. ‘God, it’s complicated,’ he says, and I nod. ‘Bighit’s scheduled a meeting for just after my contract signing with all of us, the girls, the Bighit managers and their legal team to discuss our plan of action and whether the girls are completely sure about going through with this or not,’ I say, and Jimin nods. ‘That’ll be an interesting meeting, considering Bighit are usually cheap as fuck,’ he says, surprising a laugh out of me.
‘Well, that’s a relief, anyway. Even if we’re not one big gang anymore, I’ll still see you at the building,’ he says, and I try to hold back a frown. ‘Well, yeah, and we can meet up and stuff,’ I say, hoping he’ll get the hint. ‘Oh, yeah, we could do gang nights out like once a month,’ he says excitedly, and I do frown this time, not understanding why he can’t understand. ‘Well, I meant just us two, but that too,’ I say. ‘Oh, yeah, of course. We can go on little coffee dates and things. As friends, of course,’ he says, his addition at the end making me sigh. ‘What if I didn’t want to do it as friends?’ I say, and his eyes nearly pop out of his head. ‘Huh?’ he says, and I lose it. ‘Jimin! You’re driving me insane! You keep saying you love me but you still haven’t made a move yet! Do you love me or not? Because I feel like I’ve made it pretty clear!’ I exclaim, his eyes still wide as he listens to me. ‘You said to wait until your heart’s healed!’ ‘Yeah, and that was over a month ago!’ ‘Well, how was I supposed to know?’ ‘Because you just should!’ ‘Well, I love you,’ he says, the plain and honest sincerity in his voice practically knocking the wind out of me. He takes my hand in his, eyes locked with mine, and I can feel my heart nearly beating out of my chest.
‘I thought I’d wait until you were ready, because I didn’t want to pressure you into anything. I’m sorry I didn’t get your hints, but I do love you, and I do want to be with you as more than friends,’ he says. ‘So ask me then,’ I whisper, and he smiles. ‘Will you be my girlfriend, again, y/n? Because I love you with my whole heart,’ he asks, and I feel tears spring to my eyes. I take a second to remember this moment, practically imprinting it onto my brain, trying to remember everything about him. His black top and black jeans, his newly dyed black locks (my favourite colour on him) and the silver jewellery he wears. The pink flower wall behind him, lit up with electric blue lights, and the black leather of the seats we sit on. The dimples in his cheeks, his slightly crooked front tooth, his brown sparkling eyes. ‘Yes. Because I love you too,’ I reply, and he grins, pulling me into his arms, and pressing his lips to mine.
You’d expect this to be the moment when time stops and heads spin and there’s nothing else in the world except for us. And that is the case, for about ten seconds, before a bright camera flash from Jennie’s phone distracts us both, making us break apart in shock before dissolving into giggles at being caught by all our tour members who stand in a semi-circle before us, judging with big grins on their faces. ‘Well,’ Jennie says, taking another picture, ‘it was about time.’
part sixty-one - about time
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a/n: FINALLY OMG I’VE BEEN WAITING TO WRITE THIS PART GOD😭 make sure y’all read the written part too !! lmk what y’all think of this part and hmu if you wanna be on the taglist even though it’s finishing pretty soon lol x
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#bts#bts series#BTS jimin#jimin#park jimin#bts park jimin#jimin fanfiction#bts fanfic#bts fanfiction#bts fluff#bts fake texts#park jimin smut#park jimin au#park jimin fanfic#bts texts#bts text au#bts au#bts angst#bts crack#bts smut#bts smau#bts social media au#bts imagines#bts idol au
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1015.
5k Survey LXIX
3501. Is 'no glove, no love' your STRICT policy?
>> I don’t have policies for activities I don’t participate in in the first place.
3502. What is the best Epic movie (examples of epics: ben-her, gone with the wind, last temptation of christ)?
>> I don’t know what else falls into the category of “epic movie”, so... can’t really answer.
3503. Finish the sentance.
Hey, Hey we're the: Monkees
People say we:
But we're too busy:
The time to hesitate is: now
You're too: physical
It's a nice day to: start again
3504. Have you ever had 'missing time'?
>> Only in the context of being intoxicated (and that one botched suicide attempt).
3505. Have you ever sent an electronic greeting?
>> Maybe a long time ago.
3506. If you could send anonymous tips to people you knew who would never ever find out who sent them who would you send the following tips to?
doesn't know when to leave:
poor crotch hygenie:
talks to much:
band/art/dream is going nowehere:
most likely to get arrestted:
needs to get their life together:
bad taste in clothes:
bad taste in music:
needs a hobby:
3507. Are you more likely to download porn or disney movies?
>> I don’t download much of anything, really. Streaming has become my default mode of consumption.
3508. What is it with people?
>> ???
3509. Do you eat too much sugar?
>> I can assure you that I do not.
3510 Imagine you have aband. Let's name your band.
Adjective:
Animal(plural):
Your band name is (adjective) (animals) Under Glass!
Could be better? Let's try again.
Adjective:
Noun (plural):
Your band is (adjective) (nouns) With Puppets
3511. Are you desperate but not serious?
>> I have no idea what this means.
3512. Was there a time when you were younger and it took less to get you excited? What did it take then? What does it take now?
>> Honestly, I have no recollection of excitement experiences as a child. I do know that excitement is difficult for me nowadays because 1) I’m still pretty emotionally blunted, particularly for positive emotions and 2) I automatically attribute all physical feelings that could suggest excitement to anxiety instead (because I’m still learning the difference).
3513. Remember learning to write in elementary school? We spend 2 years learning to print..then they throw that out the window and teach kids cursive. Why? If cursive is so important and easy to read then why aren't books printed in cursive? Why aren't cursive computer fonts more popular? Why do buisness forms always say 'please print'?
Schools are so preoccupied with teaching kids the complicated but traditional skill of cursive writing that more emphasis is put on that than on teaching kids how to clearly express their ideas through writing. I move that cursive writing become a jr. high school elective instead of a grammer school priority. Who's with me?
>> This seems like a personal rant based on your own experiences and I have no dog in this fight, dude. I think of penmanship like art -- script writing is an art form and being adept at it can lead to some pretty results. Just don’t use it if you don’t care for it. Also, I’m pretty sure very few (public) schools care about cursive writing in this era, lmao, so this is also an outdated rant.
3514. Can you think of anything else (besides cursive writing) that is unhelpful, or unuseful, yet traditional and unquestioned? What?
>> Whatever.
3515. Name one female celebrity who you would guess wears size ___ clothing:
0?
5?
12?
16?
20?
3516. Have you ever been to a place where the restrooms were named in a clever way rather than just saying men's and woman's? I've seen Hens and Roosters, Bart and Lisa, Dudes and Babes...what have you seen?
>> Yeah, I saw “Pirates” and “Wenches” once. I’m pretty sure I’ve seen others but I can’t remember what they were now.
3517. What is the 'message' or 'point behind':
Fight Club?
Donnie Darko?
AI?
Minority Report?
Solaris?
A Walk to Remember?
You've Got Mail?
3518. have you seen, and what are your thoughts about these movies:
Drumline?
>> Now this is a question block I can actually answer. I did see Drumline, but I was 13 at the time so I have no real recollection of my feelings about it.
The Hot Chick?
>> Nope.
Maid in Manhattan?
>> Nope.
Star Trek: Nemesis?
>> Nope.
About Schmidt?
>> Nope. Okay, maybe I can’t answer this question block after all. What are most of these movies...?
Evelyn?
>> ---
The Guys?
>> ---
Intacto?
>> ---
The Jimmy Show?
>> ---
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers?
>> I did see this, but I don’t remember much of it either because it was at least half a decade ago. I do assume I enjoyed it.
Gangs of New York?
>> ---
Two Weeks Notice?
>> ---
The Wild Thornberrys Movie?
>> ---
Smokers Only?
>> ---
Treasure Planet?
>> ---
The Santa Clause 2?
>> ---
3519. START this sentance: ....and I think to myself, what a wonderful world."
>> ---
3520. What is:
insanity?
normal?
farenheit?
3521. Tell us about yourself in the third person for a bit:
>> I’d really rather not attempt that.
3522. If someone breaks a law, should they be punished if they did not know it was a law?
>> Oh, I don’t know. This is a concept that can get real thorny real fast.
3523. If it's so much easier to learn languages when we are very young (and it is, something to do with the developing brain) why do they wait until jr high and high school to teach them?
>> I don’t know anything about the justifications behind public-school curricula, dude.
3524. Name a band you sort of like: Dream Theater.
You are wearing that band's t-shirt in a store. SUDDENLY some guy you don't know comes up to you and goes, "Hey! You like (insert name of the band here)??!!"
This is obviously a really stupid question because if you didn't like them you wouldn't be wearing the t-shirt. Your witty reply is:
>> It’s not a really stupid question, first of all, because it’s a conversation starter as opposed to a straightforward inquiry. I’d assume he’s excited that someone else seems to be a fan of a band he likes, and is opening the floor to talking about it. Which is great! Let’s talk about prog metal!
Now, on the other hand, if the tone of “hey, you like Dream Theater?” is skeptical, like he’s assuming I’m just blithely wearing the shirt without actually liking the band or whatever, then I’d probably just give him a simple “yep” and see what happened after that. I’m not going to immediately be sarcastic or “witty” until I am positive about what kind of interaction is happening.
3525. If you were organizing cd's in a music store what section would you put each of the following in (don't forget the 'bargain bin' section!):
Blink182
Depech Mode
Weezer
Led Zeppelin
The Doors
Avril Lavigne
Nelly
Manfred Mann
Iggy Pop
Pink Floyd
Guns N Roses
Shakira
Britny Spears
Tool
Ozzy Osbourne
Madonna
The Rolling Stones
The Beatles
Motley Crue
Bon Jovi
3526. Does coffee stimulate your mind or body more?
>> It stimulates my anxiety drive, is what it does.
3527. Can you do 'six degrees of seperation' to anyone famous?
>> I assume not.
3528. What's the oddest thing in your home?
>> Me.
3529. Do you find it odd when people who are not handicapped use the handicapped stall:
in the bathroom?
>> No, I’ve used it because the close quarters of the other stalls wig me out sometimes. Or I’ve used it because the other ones were disaster zones. Or I’ve used it because I was also getting changed in the stall, or something, and needed the room.
in the parking lot?
>> You need a whole placard (or handicapped license plate) for those, so there are obvious rules.
3530. Do you sometimes find yourself talking to yourself? Do you answer yourself back?
>> No, I talk to the Inworlders, not “myself”.
3531. In your head do you call yourself 'I' or 'you' or both?
>> Er... “I”?
3532. What is the best excuse for why you haven't done your homework?
>> ---
3533. Someone tells you 'well there are black people, and then there are n*ggers'. What do you think?
>> I think that person’s an out-and-out bona-fide bigot, obviously? What the fuck else am I going to think (besides “I have to leave immediately”)???
3534. Does culture shape behavior or does behavior shape culture?
>> Yes.
3535. What determines whether a person will be:
intelligent?
pretty?
happy?
sucessful?
3536. What is social loafing? What is groupthink?
>> ???
3537. I have an idea. let's change the english language by making the words fewer, shorter and more concise. What do ya think?
>> No.
3538. What are the physical symptoms of:
joy?
fear?
shame?
3539. Here's the scenerio...your little eight year old brother is hangin out in the house when you come in..and catch him watching the playboy channel!
What do you do/say?
He says, "Why can't I watch this?" What is your response?
Why do you respond that way?
>> I don’t have an eight-year-old brother and I don’t know anything about how I would respond in a sibling-dynamic situation because I’ve never been in one.
3540. Who REALLY has a higher sex drive, girls or guys? How can you tell?
>> ---
3541. are you usually carefree?
>> No.
3542. Do you generally prefer reading to meeting people?
>> This is an odd comparison to make.
3543. Do you often long for excitement?
>> No.
3544. Are you mostly quiet when you are with others?
>> It depends on what kind of situation I’m in and what kind of day I’m having. And who the others are. And where we are. Context, people. Details. Please.
3545. Do you often do things spur of the moment?
>> No.
3546. Are you slow an unhurried in the way you move?
>> Sometimes. If I’m doing something I hate or that triggers me, then I tend to be a lot more hurried.
3547. Would you do almost anything for a dare?
>> I wouldn’t do anything on a dare.
3548. Do you hate being in a crowd who plays jokes on one another?
>> Er...
3549. Do you enjoy wild parties?
>> No.
3550. Have you ever paid for something priced more than $5.00 in only change?
>> No, but I was with someone that did. We had to scrounge for change in her car so we could buy enough gas to get us the rest of the way home, lol.
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Prompt: locked in the bathroom together 😛
Remember five million years ago when I got this prompt and then didn’t know what to do with it and then figured it out after another five million years????
No?
Great!
Thanks for sending me a prompt homeslice lol!! I actually love getting them no matter how long it takes!! Also please y’all check out @tracy7307‘s blog the content is p r e m i u m.
Anyway, sorry for the rant! Here’s the prompt fulfilled!
“The door’s locked, Harrington, ain’t no getting out this one,” Billy grumbled.
And yeah, Steve got that already. He perfectly understood he’s trapped in the basement bathroom of some dickwad’s house while a rager goes on above them.
They might as well be stuck in outer space.
No one’s gonna hear him scream, no probably even knows they’re down there, they’re gonna be stuck there all night. Hell, maybe even all of tomorrow too.
“Billy, where the hell did you put the fucking key.”
“I don’t remember,” he slurred from inside the dickwad’s basement bathtub.
He had his back up against the wall, legs flung over the side of the tub. He shifted around, and grinned smugly. It looked more lazy and broken on his drunken face than anything else. “Why don’t you go ahead and frisk me for it?”
Steve pinched the bridge of his nose like his mom does when she’s trying not to yell at him.
He’s not drunk enough for this.
Billy lured him down here saying there was some freaky shit in the basement, which, is astounding because Steve still has zero clue how he knew to do that because Billy doesn’t even know about the upside down.
“I’m not frisking you, check your pockets,” Steve huffed.
Billy’s head rolled against the tile. “Not in my pockets. That’d be too easy.”
Of course would be.
Steve rarely ever feels the urge to put his foot up someone’s ass. Rarely, being the keyword, and Billy being the usual catalyst.
Steve kicked back the rug in front of the toilet, finding the same tiled floor. “You’re shitting me. Where the hell did you put it?” He dumped the toothbrush holder into the sink. Nothing. And ran his fingers above the medicine cabinet.
“Hargrove,” Steve smacked his foot.
Billy hummed. A pair of drowsy blue eyes looked up at him. “You look good angry, you know that?”
Steve flushed. He really should be used to Billy and his antics but he isn’t, he’s pretty sure he never will be.
“Light does you good,” Billy muttered. “You…your eyes change color they get kinda gold, mine don’t, not that mine aren’t nice ‘cause they are. But yours are real nice too, they’re not shit brown. They’re–”
“If you’re not gonna help me look and you’re not gonna try to remember, do me a favor and stop talking,” Steve said.
He checked behind the sink and in the toilet. No and no. He sighed, hands hitched on his hips. He scanned the room for the fifth time.
Nada.
“Oh my God,” Steve raked his hand down his face. “Why did you do this, you asshole?” He slumped down onto the floor and glared at him. “Why?” This time it wasn’t directed at Billy so much as it wasn’t directed at God who was undoubtedly smiling down at him and laughing.
Billy giggled. “You’re funny, Harrington. And dramatic.”
Steve glared at him. “Stop. Talking.”
It’s a quarter to eleven and the party doesn’t show any signs of stopping and when it does he’s sure no one’s going to be coming down the basement stairs. Everyone’s gonna either go home or fall face down drunk…and they’ll be here.
Trapped.
“I shouldn’t have even come,” Steve groaned with his palms pressed to his face. “I should’ve just stayed home.”
“Me too,” Billy agreed. “Should’ve stayed home, wouldn’t be here. We’re a couple of idiots, Harrington.”
Steve lifted his head to glare at him. “This is literally and solely your fault. I’m not an idiot, you’re just an asshole.”
Billy laughed again, mockingly. “You’re an idiot for following me down here. I didn’t even have to make you.”
Steve’s mouth snapped shut.
Touche.
He leaned his head against the bathroom wall and shut his eyes. Maybe he would fall asleep. Maybe they both would, Billy certainly looked like he could. His eyes haven’t been completely open since he hunkered down in the bathtub.
Steve listened to muted pop playing one floor above them for what felt like hours, unfortunately, it was probably minutes.
It had to be, because Billy wasn’t sleeping he was humming–loudly.
Steve opened his eyes to look at him. “Can I…help you?”
Billy hummed the low, sad song, while his head rocked back and forth slowly. Billy stopped to speak. “You like Elvis, Harrington?”
“I don’t know, I guess?” He shrugged.
Billy made a loud buzzer sound. “Either you like him or you don’t, he’s the king, King.”
“Fine, then I like Elvis.”
“Good to know a pretty boy like you can hang,” Billy said.
Steve sat there for a moment trying to decipher what that meant. Billy’s eyelids had rolled shut again. Can hang? Like liking Elvis makes him cool? Not in this decade.
Steve slapped the toe of Billy’s shoe. “Listen man, you can trap me in a fucking bathroom, but you can’t just sleep all night while I have to listen Air Supply through the ceiling.”
Billy grinned, he started to chuckle. “You know, you’re funny too, Harrington,” Billy’s grin spread into a smile, his tongue peaked between his teeth. “Yeah, you’re real funny.”
“You already said that,” Steve said.
“Well, it’s true. I meant it.”
Steve realized, then, he was serious. No jokes. No dickish assholery. Big surprise, the guy who had been saying he ‘means it’ the whole night, actually meant it. “Oh,” Steve bit the inside of his cheek. “Uh, thanks.”
Billy nodded. “No problem.”
“So,” Steve itched his nose. He felt itchy and hot. “You wanna just uh…talk until we fall asleep?” “What like pillow talk?” Billy said.
Steve winced. He knew he was blushing at this point, only Billy, drunk and painfully blunt would say that.
“No, that’s not…why would you–?”
Billy cackled. “I don’t even have to look at you to see your face right now.” He did anyway though. Billy looked at him with syrupy sweet blue eyes and a pleasant smile. “Did that one get you in a twist, Harrington? You seem like the type to be into pillow talk.”
Billy watched the flush spread down his neck and Steve’s lips curl up. “What does that…that’s not even an insult.”
“It isn’t,” he replied. “It’s an ob-ser-vation.” Billy’s eyes focused on him, “you wanna talk?”
Steve huffed. “Well, now I don’t.”
“I’ll play nice,” Billy said with obvious teeth. “C’mon, maybe talking with you will jog my memory.” He seriously doubted that, but Billy was going to say anything to get what he wanted including insults. “Fine,” he groaned. “What do you wanna talk about?”
Billy stood with a loud grunt. Steve watched him wobble before getting one leg over the tub and then another.
He dropped down next to him–too close like Billy always seems to be.
“What’s your deal with Ronnie Rothslinger?” Billy asked, leaning in.
Steve’s face screwed up. “My tutor? And it’s not Ronnie, it’s Veronica.”
Billy’s face was a myriad of emotions, finally settling on something similar to the face of a small child that’s accidentally dropped a very important piece of china. “Oh,” he said quietly.
He scoffed. “Yeah, no, me and Veronica, are…” he shrugged. “Trust me, she’s not uh…we’re not like that.”
“What? She’s not into you?” Billy prodded.
Steve scoffed. “Yeah, no, and, again, Hargrove, she’s my tutor, we, like, talk about math. There’s no ‘into’ anything.”
“You don’t like her?” Billy asked as if ‘there’s no ‘into’ anything’ didn’t mean shit.
“No,” Steve said exasperatedly. “I mean like she’s kind of an okay friend but I don’t like her, like her, you know?”
Billy seemed satisfied with that answer. Steve didn’t even know he was looking for a certain one. He nodded. “You got a thing smart chicks, I just thought…” Billy stopped. “I don’t know what I thought.”
“Yeah.”
Things were silent for a beat. Billy’s eyes had shut and for a minute Steve genuinely thought he’d fallen asleep, his head was tilted towards him, mouth a little slack.
“Billy?”
“Hmm?” He hummed.
“Why’d you lock me in here, anyway?”
Billy opened his eyes just enough to look at him through those insanely dark lashes that not even Steve could ignore. “Just wanted to hang out, s’not every day my presence is graced by the likes of you, your highness.”
“Jesus,” Steve rolled his eyes.
“Wasn’t joking around, Harrington,” Billy said.
Steve nudged him and with a small smirk. “Oh, what? Like you missed me, Hargrove?”
“Maybe.”
What is this? Honesty hour?
Steve turned to look at him only for Billy to be staring right back at him like he’d never been drunk at all, as if all the alcohol and humming and staggering had been an act. If he weren’t so red still he’d think it was.
His eyes darted around Billy’s face. They’re not really friends, barely acquaintances besides egging each other. Steve knew Billy the same way he knew tugging on pigtails and wet willies and gross jokes.
Familiar. Fun. Fleeting.
Billy looked at him like he was a vision, a dream. THE dream. That look like in the right story, in the right time they’d get in a car and drive away straight to the coast.
They barely even know each other, and Steve still kind of wanted it. Billy ran his tongue across his bottom lip, “you ever kiss a guy before, Harrington?”
“Yeah,” Steve whispered softly over the sound of muted music. “Once.”
“I haven’t,” Billy said. It was quiet and soft and forlorn, like he was embarrassed and too drunk to do anything about it.
Billy’s probably in the majority, but something tells him that’s not what he wanted to hear. Billy;s head sloped down to his shoulder, Steve felt his curls tickle his ears.
“You will,” Steve said. “One day.”
“Thanks.”
#harringrove#stranger things#i threw in some virgin billy cause i know that's your main squeeze#I hope you like it#send me stuff#my writing
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woodland creatures - day 4 (orlando pt. 2)
was i excited to be on tour? yes. was i also super nervous about going on tour before leaving? also yes.
was i excited to go to disney springs? Y E S. was it the one thing i knew i could look forward to even if i sucked at every fucking show???
B I G Y E S.
my poor bandmates. i said the night before, “hey, i just realized, we never actually really discussed going to disney springs.” and they were like, “yeah.”
but! we went anyway!!! bless their hearts!!!
the morning after staying up and partying was rough. i had the NASTIEST hangover. my headache was so severe that i couldn’t even fall back asleep following 5 hours of rest. i popped some advil and tried to get a couple more hours in but it was impossible, so i just got up and showered. the guys brought back panera for lunch, and then once everyone was ready we were off to disney springs. i could tell everyone was worried it was gonna be lame, i felt it in the air lmao. i was also worried i was leading them to a miserable afternoon in the hot florida weather. but i figured if they hated it we could always leave.
we pull up to disney springs and there is some semblance of what i remembered from the last time i was there but also a lot that i DID NOT recognize. the parking garages were definitely new. they had sensors over each parking spot that could indicate whether or not a car was in the spot, and it would update an LED screen outside the entrance with how many spots were available on each floor. i thought that was really cool. there were gardens on the sides of the garages too. we then go up some stairs and down an escalator to get in, and hooooly shit i was blown away. there was a brand new area that had a fountain and all of the shops looked reminiscent of spanish architecture. it was so beautiful.
we got group pictures in front of the fountain, and then i decided to get a happy birthday pin from guest relations lmfao. i wanted to see if i could get any free shit by just waltzing around with a birthday pin on. i was unsuccessful but i had never been in or near disney on my birthday anyways so i just rolled with it. we started to the right and went to world of disney, marketplace co-op, the lego store and the pin trading shop.
i was completely overwhelmed by how big all of the stores were. there was so much cool shit. i really thought i would have an easy time abstaining from spending money, since my sister was literally just there and got me the one thing i wanted, but i did NOT. at world of disney i bought ANOTHER pair of minnie ears, the rose gold sparkly ones lmfao. not usually my style, but there weren’t any others i was crazy about. joe got a shirt and ryan bought some stuff for his girlfriend christina. i wanted clothes but i decided to wait to see if there might be better merchandise elsewhere.
we moved on to marketplace co-op and i immediately found a disney world long sleeve shirt i loved so i grabbed that. i alsoooo balled out and got a print of the most beautiful mulan painting i have ever seen. it was a depiction of one of my favorite parts in the movie, when she is singing reflection and chops off her fuckin hair, but in the garden instead of the shrine. that movie means very very much to me as an asian american!!! besides that i got emperor’s new groove patches later on in the afternoon and that was all i spent my money on. $138 later. yeesh.
my friends eton and jeri who came to the show the night before wanted to meet up for food and drinks, so i walked over to frontera cucina. i thought maybe my bandmates might join us but they weren’t hungry and it was more of a sit down place, so we parted ways for an hour. i hadn’t seen eton and jeri since they moved down to orlando in january, holy shit. it was so good to hang out with them. we caught up and enjoyed some really good lunch. i ordered a gin and tonic that had a whole ass cucumber peel wrapped around the glass and pork belly tacos. i bugged out bad because eton wouldn’t let me pay nor could i get his venmo from jeremiah to cover my portion. it was so sweet of them to treat me. i met them through jeremiah, i always tell him how much i love his friends and how they’ve become my friends the more we all hang out together. it sucks our time was so damn brief but i’m just glad i got to see them.
after late lunch i met back up with everyone and we walked around a little longer, but i mistakenly let us stay a little later and lost track of time. it was just about time to start heading over to hail the sun. i felt really bad because people mentioned wanting to go swimming or take a nap and i effectively robbed everyone of any allotted leisure activity time by wanting to gallavant around more. i was definitely just as wiped as everyone, but i hadn’t been back to disney in forever. we hurried back to the van and drove back to kissimmee.
pulses. had been grilling and chillin at the airbnb all day, so they were ready for the gig when we got back. we got back just in time to leave when they did, like 15 minutes before. we both hopped in our respective vehicles and we were off. they always dropped snails in the tour chat and called us with snails ahead because we were slow with the van lmfao but it’s not MY FAULT the shit is SO HUGE damnit. i drove the van to the gig with josef, jaime and kris while ryan and santino stayed home.
it’s interesting to go to a show in another state, it does feel pretty weird to go somewhere unfamiliar, but it really does feel the same as attending a show at home. people really are pretty much the same everywhere else, just different geographical locations and climates. the gig was really good but the venue was SO SMALL. too small. i like the soundbar but i might like it better if you didn’t have to wade your way through a crowd of swamp ass to get to the bathrooms alllll the way on the other side of the venue opposite of the entrance. plus, it got so packed that it was really difficult to be near the stage, let alone inside the building. for most of the show the 10 of us camped out in a really great spot near the bathrooms that wasn’t getting too much traffic and had its own bar so we stayed there.
we were at the show where sergio broke his headstock. i don’t think i’ve ever seen a show where sergio stands still the entire time, in the dozens of times i’ve seen him play. he was so close to that monitor/the ceiling but i didn’t suspect his guitar was going to break. i completely missed it because i was looking down at my phone (womp) but i heard everyone audibly gasp. that sucks dude. i think that was the only bummer the whole show though besides the heat and some sloppy drunks. pulses. are friends with zach garren so he was hanging out near us here and there throughout the night. daisy came to the gig so she came and found us, we hung out for a good portion of the show, too! it was a really good chance to talk more too after the gig the night before. she told us a lot about what the florida scene is like. we told her it’s infinitely better than the tri-state area LMAO. at least like, people show up to shows and STAY on a monday night which is insane. and then joseph arrington is a friend of ours so he said hi a couple times during the gig, afterwards him and i talked more when it was quieter.
it is one of the greatest honors in my entire life that joseph arrington sees me as a homie. writing this under the presumption he’s never gonna see this lmao, but i have to pinch myself sometimes. we’ve been friends since we played the last ALLB tour september 2017. i introduced myself and mentioned that we had opened for sianvar’s 2016 tour at webster hall and he actually remembered us. ryan also introduced himself as one of his patreon donors and they talked for like 45 minutes. that show he asked for a CD (and it was years in waiting our older album too yikes lol there’s bangers on there but it doesn’t sound like us anymore) and he messaged me later that night like, “we’re listening in the van right now, you’re a great singer”. we’ve hung out at gigs a couple more times, whether we played together or either ryan or i went to go see him play. the fact he considers us peers is one of the most validating things i have. i’ve learned a lot of helpful insight from him. i have tremendous respect for him and couldn’t be more grateful that he actually likes us as musicians and as people.
all of the bands of course were awesome, i couldn’t stand the heat enough to be inside for every single hail the sun song but i caught most of their set. it’s pretty insane to see them blow up like they have. they deserve it. and i think donovan is one of the best vocalists i’ve ever heard. that whole camp of blue swan musicians are just so talented.
josef, jaime and kris graciously waited outside for me to finish talking to joe arrington, and during that time josef actually caught will swan outside. he said he had the chance to tell will swan deathstar is the reason he plays music and it made him very happy to do so. it had happened like a little bit before i came back outside. we then got lost trying to find the van and hilariously passed the actual entrance to the parking garage like 3 times. it was literally across the street and i led them around the block twice.
we went back to the airbnb for one more swim and we almost had another super late night legit just talking to pulses. kris sat outside editing photos while some of the guys swam, some of us just sat with our feet in the pool. when we got back ryan and santino had been sleeping and i think i maybe saw santino get up once to go to the bathroom. i did really want to go to sleep but ughhhhh i also thought to myself, i can sleep when i get home from tour. i get really bad FOMO every day of my life. so we stayed up and we talked about all things dance gavin dance, blue swan, our local scene, and bein in a band. it’s insane how alike we all are in our way of thinking. i also find it hard to open up to other bands though because it seems like no one else sees playing music and trying to grow a band the way we do. i just wanted to eat up any time i could bonding with pulses., taylor and tyler. thankfully we weren’t up until 4 am again but legit any time up spending time with all of my friends was worth it.
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Famine
Have some more of that Tony/ Stephen/ Peter YouTube AU for reasons lol.
“Wong is dead to me,” Stephen says and Peter rolls his eyes.
“He can’t be dead to you, we don’t know how to cook and he’s good,” he tells Stephen. “Also dead to you doesn’t mean dead to the rest of us. I still like Wong. Please come back from Nepal,” he says to the camera, almost pleading really.
Tony sighs. “We ran out of food three days ago and I feel like we’re living in a Mad Max dystopia type world where Stephen is Immortan Joe except instead of withholding water from us he tries to feed us his cooking as torture.”
Stephen gives him an offended look but he shouldn’t. Tony has never met a steak he won’t eat, he doesn’t even care if its shitty its good enough for him. Unless Stephen is the one who cooked it, then he’d rather risk chewing on a lion’s ass for sustenance.
“God, it is a dystopia over here. Wong, if you’re watching, please save us from Stephen and his attempts to cook,” Peter says, looking upset.
*
“That’s dumb, we’re not talking about that,” Peter mumbles.
“It was cute,” Tony says.
“No it wasn’t, but your discomfort with the subject is enough for me to remain interested,” Stephen tells him.
Peter gives him a dirty look, “oh fuck off, man. Why are you like this?”
Stephen shrugs delicately, “I’m sure I have no idea what you mean,” he says, nose in the air.
“Do so. But the point here is that you totally called mini Peter your son and that’s adorable,” Tony says.
“When did this even happen?” Stephen asks and honestly only he could live under a rock so much that he missed the entire social media frenzy about it. Buzzfeed wrote like five articles and Tony has to commend the company for managing to squeeze that much content out of a single line Peter said.
Tony looks over to Peter and he rolls his eyes, clearly annoyed but he goes with it. Probably because he’s mostly only fake annoyed. “I was doing an interview and the guy was a dick and he went to say some asshole shit about Peter, of the mini variety, so I uh...” he trails off and Tony rolls his eyes.
Of course he stops there. “So he snapped at the guy and told him not to talk about his son like that,” Tony says. “Which is the cutest shit I’ve ever seen.”
Stephen squints, “why do you like children and parent child bonds so much when you had horrible parents?” he asks. Peter smacks him for being an insensitive prick but Stephen ignores it, giving him a dirty look before turning back to Tony. “I’m just saying, children are messy, vial little beasts who scream and are more trouble than they’re worth. Especially with those insane disease spreading soccer moms who think their two hour YouTube search makes them more of an expert on vaccines than doctors and if you insist on turning your child into a biological weapon of warfare you keep that thing far away from society or vaccinate it,” he says, arms crossed in anger.
They pause for a beat and Tony sighs. “Children are not vial little beasts Stephen, they’re just little people.”
“No, little people have dwarfism. Children are the modern day rats.”
“That’s not fair to the kids Stephen, their parents are the rats, the kids are just the carriers,” Peter says.
Tony squints at him, “that’s the problem you found with that statement?”
Stephen considers him for a moment and sighs. “Fine, children aren’t the worst. That goes to idiot adults with no medical degrees and such a flimsy understanding of science that I’m surprised they aren’t flat earthers too.”
“Oh for gods sake how can anyone in this century be so fucking stupid! We have pictures of the earth from space! What more evidence do you need? And these morons, talking about how you can’t see the curve just looking at the earth- do you know how big this god damn planet is? Of course you can’t see the fucking curve-”
Peter cuts him off before he gets going, which might be for the best. “Yeah, can’t believe I’m saying this but uh. Back to me calling mini Peter my son,” he says somewhat awkwardly. “Before you two go off and bring up science shit only you and three other people know about.”
Tony opens his mouth to dispute that, considers, and then sighs. “Okay yeah, academia is a small world. There are definitely fields of study where its only five people yelling at each other. Anyway, children are not modern day rats that’s dehumanizing, flat earthers need to be shot to also round Mars, and Peter. Explain why you called other Peter your son. Because I’m curious.”
“I’m not,” Stephen says.
“Well no one asked your opinion,” Tony mumbles.
“I’m a third of this show so yes actually, you did. And children are absolutely modern day rats. Except the rats might actually be cleaner. We’ve seen the video of that rat showering and it probably scrubs better than any child washing their hands,” he says, nose wrinkled.
“I can see how much you want to dispute that but Tony you were a kid, I was a kid, Stephen was also a kid but probably a weirdly clean one- we all know how fucking gross we were. I don’t think I washed my hands after going to the bathroom till I was like seventeen,” he says and Stephen wrinkles his nose so hard his entire face wrinkles up as he leans heavily into Tony.
“I lied, its not children spreading disease like vermin, its people like you,” he says.
Peter rolls his eyes, “I obviously figured out washing my hands,” he says. “You’re being dramatic.”
Tony shakes his head, “oh he so isn’t. That’s disgusting, shit fingers.”
Stephen snorts and tries to avoid laughing but mostly fails at it. Peter squints, “dude, if I got actual ass shit on my hands obviously I washed them, I wasn’t out there with skid marks on my palms, Jesus.”
“Okay shit fingers,” Stephen says, causing him and Tony to start laughing.
“You know what, fuck you guys I’m going my son figure after this because he’s better than you two,” Peter mumbles.
“He won’t return your calls once he knows you’re obviously one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse. Hello, pestilence,” Stephen says.
“Oh give me a break, that’s total bullshit. Okay, you know what,” Peter says after a slight pause. “No, I will be pestilence and Stephen can be war because he can’t ever keep his god damn gate shut and has to start something about anything and he’s damn dramatic out of it too. Only war would consider haunting his roommate out of an apartment instead of moving like a normal person,” he says, nose in the air.
“What’s that make Tony then? Wouldn’t he be war?” Stephen asks and Tony rolls his eyes.
“No dipstick, I’d be death. You know, like the Merchant of Death,” he says, reminding Stephen of his past nickname. Absolutely not a point in his life that he’s proud of.
Stephen frowns. “Who’s famine?”
“Wong, because he left us here with your shit cooking, which you’re clearly using to try and starve us into war,” Peter tells him.
God, Tony didn’t think he’d ever find one person more dramatic than him let alone too. How does Rhodey deal with them all in a room? How does Pepper? “Peter Parker being your son,” Tony reminds them all, wrangling. Damn this is a wayward episode.
Peter sighs, “what? I like him. I don’t see why that needs further explanation.”
“I like Stephen, doesn’t mean I see him as my son,” Tony points out.
“I wouldn’t mind if you were my daddy,” Stephen has the gall to say with a straight face. Tony doesn’t even respond, he picks himself up and leaves the room without a word. “What was that for?” Stephen asks Peter.
“You brought up daddy kink to someone with daddy issues? The hell is wrong with you?” Peter asks.
“And here I thought the two of you wanted father figures,” Stephen says. “I’m also happy to play the role of daddy too,” he adds.
Poor Peter, he makes a gagging noise and flees the scene immediately. Stephen sits perched on the couch looking pleased with himself because he’s a bastard.
*
Tony sits in Peter’s lap with a back scratcher pointed at Stephen to keep him on the other end of the couch where he belongs. “We’ve decided,” Peter says, “that without Wong you’re not worth it. You try and kill us with food, you’re mean, and you brought up daddy kink. Actually, I think we’re just going to replace you with Wong.”
“He’s nice, and he knows how to cook, and he doesn’t bring up daddy kink,” Tony says. “All the things we need out of a person. And he’s funny,” he adds.
Stephen rolls his eyes. “You two are not ditching me for Wong,” he says, rolling his eyes.
Peter and Tony exchange a look. “Actually yeah, we are. We like Wong better.”
“Also, Wong isn’t disgustingly dirty. You think Peter is pestilence with your dirty ass habits? Fat chance,” Tony tells him. God they had no idea how much Wong did for them. The man is a blessing from a god Tony doesn’t even believe in.
“Hey, yeah, side note. When the hell did Wong move in with us?” Peter asks.
“Who cares, we’ve never encountered wet dirty underwear on a pillow until now so we should just count Wong as a blessing,” Tony says.
“If you’re implying that I wet myself I most certainly did not,” Stephen says, irritated.
“Since you had just showered I assumed that wasn't the case, given that the whole bathroom turns into fucking water world whenever you’re in there. But thanks for that not at all reassuring statement, Stephen.”
“I didn’t know he managed to get water on the ceiling until now. Wong, please come back,” Peter pleads.
*
Gamora frowns, “you just left the guy there?” she asks.
“Look Gamora, he brought up daddy kink. He did this to himself,” Peter points out. “Plus the shoot isn’t that extensive. Couple days, he can suffer for that long.” Shorts aren’t that hard and he’s not even out of the city even if he totally didn't get permission to film in Central Park so he’s going to have to watch for cops and shit. But that seemed like work and its like, a two minute scene. They can do that fast probably. Like, not with lighting but whatever. Rocket can make it work in post.
“Where’s Tony?” she asks, predicting correctly that Tony’s also out of town.
“I think he went to Nepal to go get Wong back.” Peter hopes he succeeds because he is a savior in the dark and they haven’t been giving him enough credit. Or any credit, and that’s terrible. Wong needs to know that fifty percent of their love for Stephen was actually for him.
Gamora rolls her eyes. “I don’t get you three,” she mumbles.
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You Look Happier | Chapter 5
university au, teamiplier + jack
platonic/romance/angst/(smut at one point but it’ll only be on ao3)
previous chapter
“It was awful!” I rambled, anxiously pacing around my living room. “Oh god, it was going so well and then it just fucking - ah!” I rubbed my hands together, my mind buzzing horribly.
“I didn’t know Hollywood Hills had business hours,” said Jack, who was sat on the couch. “Did you get a fine?”
“No, but I did have an anxiety attack,” I groaned.
“Oh no.” Jack sat up. “What did Ethan do?”
I cringed as I remembered the irrational crying and hyperventilating. God, it was so embarrassing and stupid, I was trying not to reduce myself to tears. “Nothing. He didn’t know what to do! He just rubbed my back and told me to breathe!”
“So he didn’t do anything wrong?”
I shook my head. “But it was so stupid! Everything was perfectly fine until I ruined it!”
Jack then stood up and went to me. “Hey, it’s okay. You didn’t ruin anything, and I’m sure Ethan told you the same thing.”
“Yeah, and how long will it be before he gets tired of it? How long do I have before he starts rolling his eyes at me?” I asked, knowing exactly how insane I sounded, but I couldn’t stop these thoughts from spilling out.
“You need to trust him,” Jack firmly said. “And it sounds impossible, but it’s not. It just takes time.”
I sighed. “I don’t want to be afraid of him. I don’t want to run away from him… I don’t want to be sad anymore…”
“I know. You won’t always be said, you have to know that.”
This was exhausting. How long was I going to be like this? When would I stop being such a stick in the mud? When will everything just stop?
Jack gently hugged me as I started to cry. I wanted all of this bad stuff to be over. I wanted to give up, I wanted to stop fighting. It was more tiring than just being depressed and anxious all the time. At least I know what to expect with the latter; It was easier to stay on the ground.
“No one said recovery was easy,” he told me. “You have to take the good with the bad. And you have to remember that this is only the beginning. You have plenty of time, and you have plenty of people who want to support you.”
I didn’t realize that I had said any of that out loud. I didn’t care. None of this was worth it. It was always going to be this way.
“No, it won’t,” Jack reassured. “And it’s completely worth it. You’ll have your good days and bad days. That’s how you can appreciate the good.”
He kept telling me these things as I cried Things were hard to hear. My knee-jerk reaction was finding a reason to stay in my private, comfy sinkhole of depression. In that moment, I couldn’t believe that I could get better. I was broken beyond repair.
However, once the worst of it was over, I wondered why I acted like that in the first place. Yes, Ethan and I got a stern talking-to by a Hollywood Hills security guard, but it wasn’t that big a deal. Yes, I was trying to get my shit together, I had done this before in the past. I knew from prior experience that I couldn’t just expect everything to be better overnight… as much as I wanted it to be like that.
~
I had forgotten how consistent you had to be when it came to communication in relationships. Ethan sent me a text a few days after the Hollywood Hills incident that made me feel kind of like an asshole.
“Hey, you’re not mad at me are you?”
Of course not. I’ve just been too exhausted and embarrassed to talk to specifically him. How does one say that without sounding crazy or rude?
“No lol I’ve just been kinda busy,” I typed before sending. Then, as an add-on, “Sorry for the silence.” Then I realized how cold and distant I sounded, so I sent some emojis following my two messages. That was three. I just triple texted.
Although, Ethan didn’t take ten years to respond this time.
“Okay, just making sure. Besides that, is everything okay?”
How can he tell? What did I say? Was I really that obvious? Was the storm cloud above my head actually visible? I was hesitating. I didn’t want to lie to him, but I didn’t want to be a burden either.
“Sometimes I’m bad at keeping in contact, even if it’s people I really like.” I sent it before I could panic.
My heart pounded as I read his reply.
“Aww… I’m the same way lol… I really like you too.”
FUCK. ABORT. RUN AWAY!
“Ay, no seas pendeja,” I mumbled to myself, catching my immediate reaction before it could spiral. “We’ve been at it for this long, we’ve already established this crap. C’mon Bella, no seas chillona.”
I sent back the monkey covering its eyes and the blue heart emojis. Then, I filmed a video to distract myself. Thankfully, I was able to be by myself again, which meant that I could film a cover while Jack was away on campus.
While I was doing my makeup, I got another text from Ethan. He was what I was doing, and I told him. Then, he asked if he could listen somehow, and I was convinced to let him in on a Skype call.
“Hey!” he greeted when his face popped up on my laptop screen.
“Hi! Don’t mind me, I’m just putting on my actual face,” I told him. “I’m nearly done.”
“Take your time,” Ethan said, resting his chin in his hands. “Work your magic.”
I took my laptop over to the bathroom and moved my products aside. Then, I continued with my routine, not really conscious of the fact that I was being watched. Strangely enough, I didn’t really mind people watching me do something I knew I was good at. Plus, I was sure Ethan would get bored of me and open another tab until I was ready to sing.
“How do you do the wing?” he asked, much to my surprise.
I paused, letting that surprised feeling pass over. “Um… I’ve had to sacrifice all my babies,” I finally answered. “I also had to summon like, five different demons with the blood of a virgin.”
“And who did you murder to get that contour?” he egged on.
I sighed as I applied highlighter to the tops of my cheekbones. “You know too much already.”
Ethan giggled. “Well, I’ll stop asking questions, Miss Makeup Artist Person Expert.”
“Yeah, stay in your lane, Mr. Gamer Person Man.”
I finished up with my makeup routine by spritzing some setting spray onto my face. For a second, I forgot I was being watched, and I had a moment of… “feelin’ myself.” I turned my head from side to side, watching my highlight catch the light. I appreciated the sharpness of my winged liner and the flawlessness of my eyebrows.
Suddenly, I heard a shutter sound and snapped out of my vain moment. I turned back to Ethan on the screen, my eyes widening.
“I’m not doin’ nothin’,” he said, feigning innocence.
“Oh god. I can only hope I look good in that screenshot,” I said timidly.
“You always look good.”
I rolled my eyes and put on my best “white girl” accent. “Aw, thanks boo!”
Then, I took my laptop back to my room. I set it down on the bed and went to get my keyboard. I stood it in front of my bed, since I didn’t have a proper bench. After, I went to grab my lights that I left in the living room.
“What are you gonna sing?” Ethan prompted.
“I’m thinking Dodie,” I replied as I went to grab my camera and tripod. “Or something else, I’m not sure.”
“Dodie,” he said. “You gotta sing Dodie.”
I hesitated as I turned on the camera and lights. “I’ve been practicing ‘When’ but I don’t know if it’s good enough.”
“Let’s hear it then. I’ll tell you if it’s good.”
It was more nervewracking knowing that Ethan was the one hearing me sing. I always needed to sing for someone before posting on my channel, but since it was going to be the guy I liked this time, I was a little nervous. I also found the song because of him, too. I could only hope I would do it justice.
Nervously, I sat down on the bed and placed my fingers on the keys. After breathing deeply, I played the first few notes of the song, but I had to start over a few times. To be honest, I was just stalling, but I got to it eventually.
“I think I’ve been telling lies, ‘cause I’ve never been in love
Everyone falls for the sunshine disguise
Distracted by who they’re thinking of”
The vocals were a little too soft for my liking, but the lyrics and Ethan’s persistence are what won me over. The more I sang it, the more lost I got in it.
“Am I the only one wishing life away?
Never caught up in the moment, busy begging the past to stay
Memories painted with much brighter ink
They tell me I loved, teach me how to think”
Part of me wished for the day I would find a happy song that I could relate to.
I sighed when I finished the song. Sheepishly, I turned to Ethan, who had a huge smile on his face. He started with a slow clap.
“You’re so talented!” he exclaimed. “Ah, your voice is so nice! I love it!”
“Thanks,” I replied, blushing furiously. “That should go on my channel, then?”
“Yes! Record it and post it, like, right now,” he excitedly told me.
“Ahh, should I?”
“Do it. Do it, and… then we’ll go out after?” Ethan said the last bit slowly and softly.
Honestly, that was all it took for me to hit “record.”
~
This time, we went to the beach. It was cold as hell, being mid-January. But it was quiet and lacking of other people. It was also getting dark, which only made it colder. I was comfortable.
“Leggings were a bad idea,” I commented as we walked on the sand. “You’re gonna have to cut off my legs later.”
“You should’ve told me sooner,” Ethan replied. “I would’ve brought a chainsaw or something.”
We both stayed silent. Then we looked at each other and laughed. Thank god we had a similar sense of humor. It was easy to be around him.
“Hey, so,” Ethan said, changing the subject. “I… I overheard Mark saying that he was talking to you again?”
Spoke too soon.
“Uh, where did you hear that?” I asked in response.
“He was telling Tyler at the office,” Ethan explained. “I just happened to… be in the room. So, it’s true, then?”
“We’re making amends,” I told him, looking out at the distance. “It’s just that… we were friends before we dated and… we want to get over the things that happened. And, I think if I don’t try to work out these things, then I’ll wind up making the same mistakes in other relationships.”
Ethan didn’t say anything at first, which prompted me to ramble.
“I’ve known Mark for two, almost three, years,” I added. “We have a lot of history. I still want him to be my friend. A-And like I said, I don’t want my past mistakes to happen in this relationship.”
“I get it,” he finally said. “That’s good that you still wanna be friends.”
“Yeah, I probably should’ve told you sooner,” I said. “I feel like that’s something you deserve to know.”
“It’s okay. I mean, he doesn’t know about… this.” Ethan gestured between the two of us. “So I guess that’s fair.”
I wanted to ask what we are but… you know the cause by now. All I knew was that we definitely weren’t just friends.
“You wanna get food and eat in the car?” he asked after a while.
“Absolutely.”
_______
next chapter
#crankgameplays x oc#ethan nestor x reader#jacksepticeye x oc#jacksepticeye x reader#ylh fic#sweetheart writes#this was a mini filler#the next chapter is where the Good Shit happes#im so excite#i hope yall are too#i hope yall are liking it#i wouldnt know bc no one tells me haha#but its ok :')
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so many people are leaving my work... i have to inform them,,,,,,,,,,,,, still. my bosses have been on like their i dunno eighth vacation of the year so they havent been around, i dunno why theyre attempting to run such a tight ship. shit is boring like.... its boring... its ...boring......................
how you cgonna specify college graduates for retail then get mad when we seek mental stimulation im literally going insnae listening to music boxes all day and interacting with no one for like a solid hour, not allowed to sit down, how do you think i wrote 30k words of a shtity fanfic while at work... how do you think ive read like 15 books while on the clock.... how is it we all excuse each other for extensive ‘bathroom breaks’ just to walk around a bit and get some kind of mental refreshemnt.... how do you think ive been thrown into full-blown panic attacks from extremely minute stimuli.....shit is boring and nothing happens and my mind is constantly “wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww”
my hours are all the fuck over the place,i worked overtime this week even though i was sick twice, i even worked that EVENT this week (WHICH FEELS LIKE A MONTH AGO, IT WAS ONLY 5 DAYS AGO, THAT IS HOW INTERMINABLE THIS WEEK HAS BEEN)
i fuckin... its... 2am and i ahve to get up in lik3 5 hours to be at work again at 10am... 10 to 7, backup backup reg, doin NOTHING “but we’re short-staffed” where??? we climb all over each other to straighten a single stack of books, we jump at the opportunity to fold a t-shirt or wrap a mug, like, where are we short staffed lmao we even had ‘greeters’ today and we were down 3 people
I DID “BREAKS” TODAY AT 11AM, AND THEN AT 7PM. WHAT DID I DO FOR THOSE 6 HOURS IN BETWEEN? I COULDNT FUCKIN TELL YA. I ATE A LOT OF CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES AND FUCKED OFF IN THE LOUNGE AND NOBODY KNEW I WAS MISSING AND NOBODY WAS AFFECTED BY MY ABSENCE. COOKIES. ON THE CLOCK. TIL 9 FUCKIN PM
ISNT IT IMPORTANT THAT I HAVE A DEGREE??? TO EAT COOKIES??? TO COPE???
glugl gluglug glug lgulg glug glugl glug glug
i saw a Couple today that made me think about how one time i was a Couple and it feels like a different lifetime. yeahhh, yeahh even though im nervous i think it’s t-t-t-t-time. it been 2 years, fertt spinehewer says "General rule of thumb now is to work hard and toil for 2 years. If you don't see a decent raise/promotion, it's time to look elsewhere upwards.” hes a bit emotionally stale, even for an orc boy, but it’s still good. he has good work ethic
i toiled as much as one can in this kinda position; if i toil too hard it ‘looks bad’. lmao but ive kept my cool, ive taken shit, ive gargled customers’ piss with grit teeth (sorry thats.... i dunno, It Be Like That Sometimes), i have had panic attacks so bad in public ive come close to pissing myself at my job because i cannot be removed from the offending stimulus in time and im trying desperately not to scream
i was talking w a coworker who just put in her two weeks, speaking of piss, because apparently my bosses are hounding her (and have been for like 2 months) about her bathroom breaks, which we ALL take, some of us (me) much MUCH longer than others, yet she’s the one getting shit for it, which is so fucking weird to me. my boss legit asked her “what are you doing in there?” PISSING, DUDE? WE TALK TO PEOPLE WE GET THIRSTY WE GOTTA PISS WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM i dunno but uh a child wandered into the store and his parents up and grabbed him, he must have been special needs, he started howling just...an absolute tortured scream, it stopped me in my tracks and mid-sentence and my coworker said i “went white”, like she saw my visceral-ass PANIC MODE reaction and i IMMEDIATELY started grounding myself, tapping fingertips, like, shuddering breath, it’s insane how potent the trigger was. the child sounded like he was being gored. i couldnt take it, it was too strong, i became afraid, i became a child. i became THAT child. sensory overload was creepign up but i think my recent pon farr week has blown all of that out of the water for a while that iw as able to get it undr control, it was small ptoatoes compared to this fuckin GAUNTLET this hell week has been.
I BECAME THAT CHILD and i feared for my LIFE, akin to when i was watching the babadook. LOL TRIGGEREDD!! LE TRIGGERED!!!
i cant even imagine the scream now, i cant even remember it, it shot with such white-hot immediacy into the center of my brain that it was barely a sound, it was just a concentrated trauma bullet
they were pulling him out by his arms and he was kicking his legs. he had been in the other building earlier but that one just sounded like a typical child-scream of ‘i dont wanna go!’ or ‘i need a nap’. but this was... like tearing of ffingernails type screaming. like ‘january scratched repeatedly by 400 the cat’ screaming. it was too mcuh and i was really freaking out
still dont want to sleep
cant believe all weve got are humans. there are so many humans in the world. why
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160.
5000 Question Survey Pt. 37
3501. Is ‘no glove, no love’ your STRICT policy?
i mean, no. i’m on the pill so i don’t really care
3502. What is the best Epic movie (examples of epics: ben-her, gone with the wind, last temptation of christ)?
oh i don’t know
3503. Finish the sentence.
Hey, Hey we’re the: people.
People say we: suck
But we’re too busy: fucking
The time to hesitate is: never
You’re too: weak
It’s a nice day to: fuck
3504. Have you ever had 'missing time’?
i don’t even know what that means
3505. Have you ever sent an electronic greeting?
i don’t think so
3506. If you could send anonymous tips to people you knew who would never ever find out who sent them who would you send the following tips to?
doesn’t know when to leave: my mom
poor crotch hygiene: uhhh.. i don’t know
talks too much: an old co-worker
band/art/dream is going nowhere: hannah
most likely to get arrested: my brother
needs to get their life together: andy
bad taste in clothes: i don’t know
bad taste in music: paul
needs a hobby: mariann
3507. Are you more likely to download porn or disney movies?
porn
3508. What is it with people?
who knows.
3509. Do you eat too much sugar?
i don’t think so
3510. Imagine you have a band. Let’s name your band.
Adjective:
Animal(plural):
Your band name is (adjective) (animals) Under Glass!
Could be better?
Let’s try again.
Adjective:
Noun (plural):
Your band is (adjective) (nouns) With Puppets
3511. Are you desperate but not serious?
not really.
3512. Was there a time when you were younger and it took less to get you excited?
yeah definitely
What did it take then?
anything really
What does it take now?
study stuff usually.
3513. Remember learning to write in elementary school?
uh huh
We spend 2 years learning to print..then they throw that out the window and teach kids cursive. Why?
because it’s important too
If cursive is so important and easy to read then why aren’t books printed in cursive?
some of them are, actually
Why aren’t cursive computer fonts more popular?
it looks more professional when things are written/typed in cursive so i think more professional websites or books are cursive probably
Why do business forms always say 'please print’?
sometimes cursive is hard to read
Schools are so preoccupied with teaching kids the complicated but traditional skill of cursive writing that more emphasis is put on that than on teaching kids how to clearly express their ideas through writing. I move that cursive writing become a jr. high school elective instead of a grammar school priority. Who’s with me?
i don’t really care either way. i don’t even think they teach cursive anymore
3514. Can you think of anything else (besides cursive writing) that is unhelpful, yet traditional and unquestioned? What?
religion
3515. Name one female celebrity who you would guess wears size ___ clothing:
0?
5?
12?
16?
20?
3516. Have you ever been to a place where the restrooms were named in a clever way rather than just saying men’s and woman’s? I’ve seen Hens and Roosters, Bart and Lisa, Dudes and Babes…what have you seen?
i’ve seen stuff like that, but i can’t name any right now
3517. What is the 'message’ or 'point behind’:
Fight Club? to fight? idfk
Donnie Darko? people are fucked up
AI?
Minority Report?
Solaris?
A Walk to Remember? you never know where you can find love.
You’ve Got Mail?
3518. have you seen, and what are your thoughts about these movies:
Drumline?
The Hot Chick? lol a classic comedy, i love this movie
Maid in Manhattan?
Star Trek: Nemesis?
About Schmidt?
Evelyn?
The Guys?
Intacto?
The Jimmy Show?
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers? it’s ok
Gangs of New York?
Two Weeks Notice?
The Wild Thornberrys Movie? i used to love the show but i don’t know if i’ve ever seen the movie or not
Smokers Only?
Treasure Planet?
The Santa Clause 2?
3519. START this sentence: ….and I think to myself, what a wonderful world.“
-
3520. What is:
insanity?
normal?
Fahrenheit? a temperature
3521. Tell us about yourself in the third person for a bit:
no.
3522. If someone breaks a law, should they be punished if they did not know it was a law?
yes. they should be educated on the laws
3523. If it’s so much easier to learn languages when we are very young (and it is, something to do with the developing brain) why do they wait until jr high and high school to teach them?
that’s just how it is. idk if parents wanted their kids to learn other languages when they were younger then maybe they’d teach them themselves or give them books or something
3524. Name a band you sort of like:
journey
You are wearing that band’s t-shirt in a store. SUDDENLY some guy you don’t know comes up to you and goes, "Hey! You like (insert name of the band here)??!!”
This is obviously a really stupid question because if you didn’t like them you wouldn’t be wearing the t-shirt. Your witty reply is:
yes
3525. If you were organizing cd’s in a music store what section would you put each of the following in (don’t forget the 'bargain bin’ section!):
Blink182 top hits
Depech Mode
Weezer top hits
Led Zeppelin
The Doors
Avril Lavigne 2000s hits
Nelly r&b
Manfred Mann
Iggy Pop
Pink Floyd
Guns N Roses
Shakira pop
Britny Spears pop
Tool
Ozzy Osbourne bargain
Madonna
The Rolling Stones classic
The Beatles classic
Motley Crue classic
Bon Jovi classic
3526. Does coffee stimulate your mind or body more?
body.
3527. Can you do 'six degrees of separation’ to anyone famous?
i don’t even know what that means
3528. What’s the oddest thing in your home?
idk.
3529. Do you find it odd when people who are not handicapped use the handicapped stall:
in the bathroom? no because sometimes at a workplace some people don’t have employee restrooms and may need to change or something and sometimes mothers go into the bathroom with their children, or if all the other stalls are full and someone really has to go to the bathroom. so some circumstances are okay.
in the parking lot? i’m not ok with this.
3530. Do you sometimes find yourself talking to yourself? Do you answer yourself back?
i talk to myself sometimes and occasionally answer back
3531. In your head do you call yourself 'I’ or 'you’ or both?
both.
3532. What is the best excuse for why you haven’t done your homework?
i didn’t feel like it
3533. Someone tells you 'well there are black people, and then there are n*ggers’. What do you think?
yeah that’s ignorant.
3534. Does culture shape behavior or does behavior shape culture?
culture shapes behavior
3535. What determines whether a person will be:
intelligent? put in some work
pretty? genetics
happy? positivity
successful? hardworking.
3536. What is social loafing? What is groupthink?
i have no idea
3537. I have an idea. let’s change the english language by making the words fewer, shorter and more concise. What do ya think?
no.
3538. What are the physical symptoms of:
joy? involuntary smiles.
fear? it’s all in the eyes.
shame? blushing
3539. Here’s the scenerio…your little eight year old brother is hangin out in the house when you come in..and catch him watching the playboy channel!
What do you do/say?
i walk away
He says, “Why can’t I watch this?” What is your response?
i don’t care and walk away because he’s my brother not my child
Why do you respond that way?
bc i don’t care
3540. Who REALLY has a higher sex drive, girls or guys? How can you tell?
it usually depends on the age and the individual
3541. are you usually carefree?
most of the time
3542. Do you generally prefer reading to meeting people?
yes
3543. Do you often long for excitement?
sometimes
3544. Are you mostly quiet when you are with others?
usually, yes
3545. Do you often do things spur of the moment?
nope
3546. Are you slow an unhurried in the way you move?
i don’t think so, quite the opposite actually
3547. Would you do almost anything for a dare?
sometimes
3548. Do you hate being in a crowd who plays jokes on one another?
i don’t really care
3549. Do you enjoy wild parties?
on occasion
3550. Have you ever paid for something priced more than $5.00 in only change?
probably once or twice before
3551. Is racism still a big part of our culture?
sadly, yes.
3552. A drawing was shown to a person. The drawing showed a black man in a business suit standing next to a white man holding a razor. The person who saw this drawing was white and was asked to describe it to a second white person who had not seen it, who described it to a third, and so on. By the end of six rounds the final report often placed the razor in the hand of the black man and it is claimed he is waving it threateningly. What do you think of this?
i don’t really have an opinion
3553. How many famous people can you name who committed suicide?
too many honestly
3554. Do you have OCD?
no.
3555. Are you more anxious or relaxed? anxious.
Insecure or secure? secure
Sociable or with drawn? more withdrawn probably
Original or conventional? original.
3556. Are you more emotional or calm? emotional
self pitying or content? content.
Fun loving or sober? fun loving.
Imaginative or down to earth? a little bit of both, i think.
3557. Are you more Friendly or aloof? friendly.
adventurous or cautious? adventurous
Broad or narrow when it comes to interests? broad.
receptive or closed to new ideas? receptive.
3558. Are you more good natured or irritable? ehhh a mix
soft hearted or ruthless? soft hearted
well organized or disorganized? pretty well organized.
Dependable or undependable? dependable.
3559. Are you more courteous or rude? courteous.
sympathetic or tough minded? sympathetic.
hardworking or lazy? lazy.
ambitious or easy going? easy going.
Anxiety Insecurity Emotionalism and Self Pity are traits of a neurotic personality.
Sociable, fun loving, friendly and adventurous are traits of an extroverted personality.
originality, imaginative, broad interests, and receptive are traits of an Open personality.
Good natured, soft hearted, courteous, and sympathetic are traits of an agreeable personality.
Well organized, dependable, hardworking and ambitious are traits of a conscientious personality.
3560. Do men and woman have little or a lot in common?
depends
3561. Do you feel like any of the teachers you’ve ever had have REALLY cared about educating you to think for yourself?
very few of them, but yeah
Do you tend to try harder if they DO care?
yes.
3562. Have you ever been stereotyped? As what?
yes
3563. Have you ever been discriminated against? For what?
yes
3564. How often is your school and/or job closed due to weather?
not anymore, at least not for a while
3565. Who do you know that you believe does not masturbate?
i have some friends that said they’ve never done it but idk
3566. Does a cloned human being have a soul? Why or why not?
uhhh yeah, i’d say that eventually they become their own person and become a separate being from that of the person they were cloned from
3567. Finish the sentence: As the world turns..I only have one concern…that:
idk.
3568. What group in history has been the most oppressed?
a lot of different groups
3569. Have you read any biographies? Whose?
yes, plenty of them
3570. What are you obsessed with?
sleep.
3571. Break out your decoder ring..(no hints this time)! t3ii9 8 i9f3 697 29h5 697 53ii j3 6974 hqj3?
no.
3572. Do you crack your:
knuckes?
neck?
back?
other? yes to all.
3573. Of the following powers which 2 would you pick for yourself? The ability to fly, breathe under water, turn invincible, change into animals, freeze and restart time, never gain weight unless you want to, heal people with your touch, have orgasms that last for an hour
never gain weight and breathing under water
3574. Do you chew your pencils and pens?
i put them in my mouth but i don’t chew on them
3575. Can you tell the exact point where your back ends and your butt begins?
yes
3576. When you are bored do you picture everyone around you naked?
no? lol that’s weird
3577. What are some great holiday gift ideas for
guys: socks, underwear, tools
girls: clothes, shoes, makeup, perfume
3578. Who looks better naked, men or woman?
women for sure lol
3579. Do you sit in chairs or fall into them?
a little bit of both
3580. Has anyone ever
screamed your name during sex? no
moaned your name during sex? yes.
3581. Hershey’s kisses: mint, almond, hugs, plain. other?
plain.
3582. What’s the best slurpee flavor?
red, whatever that is? cherry, i guess
3583. What are five movies that you think someone would have to be living under a rock in iceland to not have seen?
mean girls, white chicks, titanic, jurassic park, home alone
3584. Of these words, which ones are funny:
beets?
cumquat?
pit?
Piss-capades?
fuzzy?
What are some other funny words?
moist
3585. Do you give good massages?
i think so
3586. What songs have been 'stuck’ in your head?
lots
3587. What don’t most people know about your job?
it’s easy lol
3588. Is there anything you won’t say unless someone else says it first?
i don’t think so
3589. Do you need a little Christmas?
no
3590. Fake or real tree?
fake.
3591. Is your refrigerator running? You know what to do.
yes.
3592. How can you explain when there are few words you can choose?
idk.
3593. Who can it be now?
i love that song
3594. Where HAS Joe Dimaggio gone? And why does our nation turn it’s eyes to him?
idk.
3595. How often do you get headaches?
very often
3596. Have you ever worn fake eyelashes?
nope
3597. What could you spend 24 hours in a row doing?
watching tv
3598. Is it Friday yet?
not quite
3599. Do you remember There was a time (ahaha) when people on the street were walking hand in hand in hand?/
no.
3600. Do you talk to inanimate objects? on occasion
Do you try to get them to answer you? no.
Have they ever answered you? no.
0 notes
Text
600.
5000 Question Survey Pt. 37
3501. Is 'no glove, no love' your STRICT policy?
i’ve been on the pill for 8 years and i’ve only had one sexual partner since then so not really. if sleeping with someone new, then yeah.
3502. What is the best Epic movie (examples of epics: ben-her, gone with the wind, last temptation of christ)?
umm.. not sure.
3503. Finish the sentence.
Hey, Hey we're the: people.
People say we: are too nice.
But we're too busy: living.
The time to hesitate is: idk.
You're too: boring.
It's a nice day to: sleep.
3504. Have you ever had 'missing time'?
no?
3505. Have you ever sent an electronic greeting?
hahaha yeah. back when internet was dial-up, e-cards were all the rage. i sent them all the time.
3506. If you could send anonymous tips to people you knew who would never ever find out who sent them who would you send the following tips to?
doesn't know when to leave: my bf’s brother.
poor crotch hygiene: omg haha no one.
talks too much: sara.
band/art/dream is going nowhere: sean.
most likely to get arrested: not sure.
needs to get their life together: me.
bad taste in clothes: no one really.
bad taste in music: meh, i respect everyone’s taste in music.
needs a hobby: my boyfriend lol.
3507. Are you more likely to download porn or disney movies?
disney movies.
3508. What is it with people?
who knows.
3509. Do you eat too much sugar?
probably.
3510. Imagine you have a band. Let's name your band.
Adjective: wild.
Animal(plural): pandas
Your band name is (adjective) (animals) Under Glass!
Could be better? no.
Let's try again.
Adjective:
Noun (plural):
Your band is (adjective) (nouns) With Puppets
3511. Are you desperate but not serious?
not really.
3512. Was there a time when you were younger and it took less to get you excited?
yes.
What did it take then?
just getting out of the house.
What does it take now?
now staying at home makes me excited lol.
3513. Remember learning to write in elementary school?
yes.
We spend 2 years learning to print..then they throw that out the window and teach kids cursive. Why?
i didn’t learn cursive at school.
If cursive is so important and easy to read then why aren't books printed in cursive?
Why aren't cursive computer fonts more popular?
Why do buisness forms always say 'please print'?
Schools are so preoccupied with teaching kids the complicated but traditional skill of cursive writing that more emphasis is put on that than on teaching kids how to clearly express their ideas through writing. I move that cursive writing become a jr. high school elective instead of a grammer school priority. Who's with me?
3514. Can you think of anything else (besides cursive writing) that is unhelpful, or unuseful, yet traditional and unquestioned? What?
algebra. never used it after school.
3515. Name one female celebrity who you would guess wears size ___ clothing:
0? no.
5?
12?
16?
20?
3516. Have you ever been to a place where the restrooms were named in a clever way rather than just saying men's and woman's? I've seen Hens and Roosters, Bart and Lisa, Dudes and Babes...what have you seen?
blokes and shielas and the hawaiian words for men and female.
3517. What is the 'message' or 'point behind':
Fight Club?
Donnie Darko?
AI? technology may be able to surpass our intelligence.
Minority Report?
Solaris?
A Walk to Remember? you never know where you can find love.
You've Got Mail?
3518. have you seen, and what are your thoughts about these movies:
Drumline? loved this! never thought i’d be into a movie about drumming.
The Hot Chick? pretty funny.
Maid in Manhattan? just the typical, cute, romantic comedy.
Star Trek: Nemesis?
About Schmidt?
Evelyn?
The Guys?
Intacto?
The Jimmy Show?
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers?
Gangs of New York?
Two Weeks Notice?
The Wild Thornberrys Movie?
Smokers Only?
Treasure Planet?
The Santa Clause 2?
3519. START this sentence: ....and I think to myself, what a wonderful world."
i see them bloom, for me and you.
3520. What is:
insanity? omg no.
normal?
farenheit?
3521. Tell us about yourself in the third person for a bit:
no.
3522. If someone breaks a law, should they be punished if they did not know it was a law?
most people know the law... unless it’s one of those really obscure ones. if this was a thing, a lot of people would claim not to know what they did was illegal.
3523. If it's so much easier to learn languages when we are very young (and it is, something to do with the developing brain) why do they wait until jr high and high school to teach them?
if you start teaching a child another language they may not know the difference between their first and second language. that’s exactly what happened to me as a kid, i switched between the two without knowing which was which.
3524. Name a band you sort of like:
dvsn.
You are wearing that band's t-shirt in a store. SUDDENLY some guy you don't know comes up to you and goes, "Hey! You like (insert name of the band here)??!!"
This is obviously a really stupid question because if you didn't like them you wouldn't be wearing the t-shirt. Your witty reply is:
i sure do.
3525. If you were organizing cd's in a music store what section would you put each of the following in (don't forget the 'bargain bin' section!):
Blink182 way too lazy to do this.
Depech Mode
Weezer
Led Zeppelin
The Doors
Avril Lavigne
Nelly
Manfred Mann
Iggy Pop
Pink Floyd
Guns N Roses
Shakira
Britny Spears
Tool
Ozzy Osbourne
Madonna
The Rolling Stones
The Beatles
Motley Crue
Bon Jovi
3526. Does coffee stimulate your mind or body more?
body.
3527. Can you do 'six degrees of separation' to anyone famous?
i can do four lmao. my cousin’s friend acted in a movie with halle berry. done lol.
3528. What's the oddest thing in your home?
idk.
3529. Do you find it odd when people who are not handicapped use the handicapped stall:
in the bathroom?
in the parking lot? yeah both. it’s rude.
3530. Do you sometimes find yourself talking to yourself? Do you answer yourself back?
i only talk to myself in my thoughts.
3531. In your head do you call yourself 'I' or 'you' or both?
both.
3532. What is the best excuse for why you haven't done your homework?
i don’t have homework.
3533. Someone tells you 'well there are black people, and then there are n*ggers'. What do you think?
omg that’s an instant ignore. i already know that person is arrogant and ignorant as fuck. i just hate that word.
3534. Does culture shape behavior or does behavior shape culture?
first one.
3535. What determines whether a person will be:
intelligent? some are born smart and some put in work to be smart.
pretty? just their genetic makeup in a physical sense.
happy? bubbly, cheerful personality.
successful? hardworking.
3536. What is social loafing? What is groupthink?
idk.
3537. I have an idea. let's change the english language by making the words fewer, shorter and more concise. What do ya think?
no.
3538. What are the physical symptoms of:
joy? involuntary smiles.
fear? it’s all in the eyes.
shame? blushing, hanging your head down.
3539. Here's the scenerio...your little eight year old brother is hangin out in the house when you come in..and catch him watching the playboy channel!
What do you do/say?
what are you watching?
He says, "Why can't I watch this?" What is your response?
you’re too young.
Why do you respond that way?
8yo is too young to be exposed to sexual content imo.
3540. Who REALLY has a higher sex drive, girls or guys? How can you tell?
it just depends on the individual.
3541. are you usually carefree?
not really.
3542. Do you generally prefer reading to meeting people?
i’m in between. depends on my mood.
3543. Do you often long for excitement?
weekly.
3544. Are you mostly quiet when you are with others?
if i know the group, then no.
3545. Do you often do things spur of the moment?
not usually.
3546. Are you slow an unhurried in the way you move?
no.
3547. Would you do almost anything for a dare?
haha no.
3548. Do you hate being in a crowd who plays jokes on one another?
i don’t mind. depends how far they’ll go though.
3549. Do you enjoy wild parties?
i did when i was younger.
3550. Have you ever paid for something priced more than $5.00 in only change?
probably.
3551. Is racism still a big part of our culture?
sadly, yes.
3552. A drawing was shown to a person. The drawing showed a black man in a buisness suit standing next to a white man holding a razor. The person who saw this drawing was white and was asked to describe it to a second white person who had not seen it, who described it to a third, and so on. By the end of six rounds the final report often placed the razor in the hand of the black man and it is claimed he is waving it threateningly. What do you think of thiss?
stupid.
3553. How many famous people can you name who committed suicide?
i’d rather not.
3554. Do you have OCD?
no.
3555. Are you more anxious or relaxed? anxious.
Insecure or secure? insecure.
Sociable or with drawn? in between.
Original or conventional? original.
3556. Are you more emotional or calm? calm.
self pitying or content? content.
Fun loving or sober? fun loving.
Imaginative or down to earth? down to earth.
3557. Are you more Friendly or aloof? friendly.
adventurous or cautious? cautious.
Broad or narrow when it comes to interests? broad.
receptive or closed to new ideas? receptive.
3558. Are you more good natured or irritable? good natured.
soft hearted or ruthless? in between.
well organized or disorganized? organized.
Dependable or undependable? dependable.
3559. Are you more courteous or rude? courteous.
sympathetic or tough minded? sympathetic.
hardworking or lazy? lazy.
ambitious or easy going? easy going.
Anxiety Inscurity Emotionalism and Self Pity are traits of a neurotic personality.
Sociable, fun loving, friendly and adventurous are traits of an extraverted personality.
orignality, imaginative, broad interests, and receptive are traits of an Open personality.
Good natured, soft hearted, courteous, and sympathetic are traits of an agreeable personality.
Well organized, dependable, hardworking and ambitious are traits of a conscientious personality.
3560. Do men and woman have little or a lot in common?
depends on the individuals. there’s no answer to this.
3561. Do you feel like any of the teachers you've ever had have REALLY cared about educating you to think for yourself?
eh, yes a couple.
Do you tend to try harder if they DO care?
yes.
3562. Have you ever been stereotyped? As what?
not really actually.
3563. Have you ever been discriminated against? For what?
yes, my race.
3564. How often is your school and/or job closed due to weather?
never. it’s open 24/7.
3565. Who do you know that you believe does not masturbate?
haha it’s not something i think about.
3566. Does a cloned human being have a soul? Why or why not?
i honestly have no idea. probably not.
3567. Finish the sentance: As the world turns..I only have one concern...that:
idk.
3568. What group in history has been the most oppressed?
a lot of different groups, let’s be real.
3569. Have you read any biographies? Whose?
yes.
3570. What are you obsessed with?
sleep.
3571. Break out your decoder ring..(no hints this time)! t3ii9 8 i9f3 697 29h5 697 53ii j3 6974 hqj3?
no.
3572. Do you crack your:
knuckes?
neck?
back?
other? yes to all.
3573. Of the following powers which 2 would you pick for yourself? The ability to fly, breathe under water, turn invincible, change into animals, freeze and restart time, never gain weight unless you want to, heal people with your touch, have orgasms that last for an hour
never gain weight and heal people.
3574. Do you chew your pencils and pens?
no.
3575. Can you tell the exact point where your back ends and your butt begins?
no.
3576. When you are bored do you picture everyone eround you naked?
no.
3577. What are some great holiday gift ideas for
guys: cologne, clothes, alcohol.
girls: makeup, candles, perfume.
3578. Who looks better naked, men or woman?
women.
3579. Do you sit in chairs or fall into them?
if i know the chair well i’ll fall into it lol.
3580. Has anyone ever
screamed your name during sex? yes.
moaned your name during sex? yes.
3581. Hershey's kisses: mint, almond, hugs, plain. other?
plain.
3582. What's the best slurpee flavor?
raspberry.
3583. What are five movies that you think someone would have to be living under a rock in iceland to not have seen?
any disney classic. everyone would’ve seen at least one.
3584. Of these words, which ones are funny:
beets?
cumquat?
pit?
Piss-capades?
fuzzy?
What are some other funny words?
no.
3585. Do you give good massages?
yes.
3586. What songs have been 'stuck' in your head?
none.
3587. What don't most people know about your job?
it’s easy af.
3588. Is there anything you won't say unless someone else says it first?
no.
3589. Do you need a little chrsitmas?
huh?
3590. Fake or real tree?
fake.
3591. Is your refrigerator running? You know what to do.
yes.
3592. How can you explain when there are few words you can choose?
idk.
3593. Who can it be now?
idk.
3594. Where HAS Joe Dimaggio gone? And why does our nation turn it's eys to him?
idk.
3595. How often do you get headaches?
hardly ever.
3596. Have you ever woen fake eyelashes?
yes.
3597. What could you spend 24 hours ina row doing?
haha lay in bed.
3598. Is it Friday yet?
it is actually.
3599. Do you remember There was a time (ahaha) when people on the street were walking hand in hand in hand?/
no.
3600. Do you talk to inanimate objects? no.
Do you try to get them to answer you? no.
Have they ever answered you? no.
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