What was that about "just the small ones" dying and it not being a big deal in the grand scheme, Darius?

But legit we know next to nothing about Eber and even less about how these two became so close, yet even in the face of the world ending, not only do they look to each other triumphantly when things are going well

But Darius immediately stopped fighting if it meant Eber would die, even if they were all going to die anyway watching them die now was not an option

Even worse, the second Eber was released from the Oracle Coven Head's power, they got up and were absolutely going to rush to Darius before succumbing to the draining spell

Even having no explanation for their dynamic it's painfully clear how significant they are to each other, and goddamn if I'm not invested in Darius & Eber besties for life

what's the theme you're fucking going for here voliiii!!! what are you fucking getting at!!! what are you trying to say, what's the point??

‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️MUTANT MAYHEM SPOILERSS ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVENT SEEN IT AND DONT WANT SPOILERS

Okay now with that out of the way, my thoughts on the movie

I really enjoyed it.

I went to see it with a few friends and one of them made a really good point. They actually act like teenagers. Like yes, it was kinda cringey at some parts but that’s because it sounded like something a teenager would say because teenagers are awkward.

I’ve had very stupid conversations with my friends that sound like the conversations in the movie.

I noticed that this movie did the “teen talk” a lot better than I’m pretty sure all other versions of tmnt (in my opinion), even better than rise I think. Most others sound like adults writing teenagers and it sounds good most of the time but others it sounds weird.

Now for the main reason I made this post: April and Leo.

I was kind of dreading this when I saw in the trailers Leo would be interested in her (2012 April and Donnie flashbacks) but it was well done. I am a bit tired of April being a love interest for the turtles but I think it’s important to include that April is black, plus size and has acne and how Leo described her as “the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen”. Unfortunately the qualities she has aren’t shown very often to be attractive because of bs beauty standards.

It’s late so I can’t fully explain what I’m trying to say so disclaimer in case I didn’t come across this way: I don’t think that being black, plus size or having acne makes you not pretty, you are, just society sometimes says that and society is stupid.

April and Leo are cute together and written well and there is no “one of them is obsessed and the other is leading them on” going on. The fact that they end the movie looking into TCRI is adorable to me. My fav investigator duo.

Also Leo is an absolute dork. The whole phone call scene: “it’s a date then!” “Wait what a date?” “Uhhh *cue fumbling and wrestling for the phone* uhh nothing bad service byeee! Who’s got no rizz now?” Like Leo you are bad at this oh my god. (Again awkward teenager stuff)

And his bothers teasing him was so funny. They did not let that slide and teased him at every opportunity. Classic sibling behaviour

The tease for shredder was fun and I can’t wait to see what they do with him and his backstory.

Best Splinter. I love him so much. I love his whole “hating humans” arc and how he paralleled superfly and how he CHOSE to not be like him.

Both superfly and splinter have a very understandable fear (that turned into hate) of humans and how they both thought that the best way to protect their families were to hold their family too tight.

While splinter hid from the world and his fear pushed him into hiding and laying low, superfly’s fear caused him to lash out and take out his anger in a destructive way.

But splinter getting a girlfriend at the end was so cute he deserves this.

Also side note: why did so many turtles almost get hit by cars in this movie? Specifically Mikey.

He almost got hit in the flashback, then in the garage, then in the final battle with the flying cars. Then Donnie also almost got hit, I think just before they were captured but I’m not sure.

When they had to leave the movie and walked home really sadly and kept looking at the humans longingly I legit almost cried.

I was kind of surprised they ended up actually going to school and everyone was accepting. I thought they’d be like “we don’t need humans to accept us cause we accept ourselves” but I’m glad they got to go to school. They deserve it.

Also April being super upfront with them about if they didn’t save her she’d probably be running screaming was so funny. Also how she was planning to release a story about them while knowing humans probably wouldn’t accept them was a very realistic thing.

I loved April so much by the way. The way she fucking chucked the news mic into the crowd was iconic.

The fight scenes were SOOOO AMAZING I LOVED THEM SO MUCH. The splitting between the 4 (I think) fights at the same time and every other fight scene were so well done. Them figuring out that they skills they learned for years actually work in a fight and how they’re awesome at it was adorable to watch. And the way in the beginning how they were using their skills to steal get groceries was great.

All the turtles up from every version are good fighters (in their own ways) but these versions are definitely up there with how skilled and how well they work as a team. Love them.

AND THE TURTLES SHARING A ROOM AND BUNK BEDS WAS ADORABLE. It’s so funny cause later they were like “yea we have so much space to hold the 6 or 7 other mutants in our house on short notice we have lots of space!” Which means they chose to share a room with is adorable and a little bit unrealistic lol.

It seemed like a pretty realistic movie and I have bullet points of the least realistic parts (excluding the mutant animals cause duh). And this is just me being picky lol, I still loved this movie and these are just jokes.

The fact that they wrote nice things on aprils locker at the end of the movie

(Pointed out by my friend). She went from being puke girl to April O’hero. They would probably stop teasing her since she was friends with the most popular kids in the city but the 2 most likely outcomes would be

1. They just stopped and then left the insults on there, maybe scratched them out

2. Wiped off the locker and never spoke of it again

No one writes nice things on other peoples lockers lol

The boys want to share a room

I guarantee if 4 teenage brothers had a choice between sharing bunk beds and each having their own rooms, they’d have their own rooms.

Imagine arguing with your sibling and you don’t have your own room to sulk and avoid them? By choice??? People need their own spaces. No matter how much I love my siblings if I shared a room with them it’d be chaos.

There would be one prank done in that room to one of their beds and that’d be the end of the shared room lol

The fact that everyone unquestionably liked them (especially at school)

Kids are assholes. That’s it.

AGAIN this is just things I thought were unrealistic in a funny way, it’s a kids movie so it’s not that deep.

This was definitely one of my favourite versions of tmnt (I haven’t seen all of them but still). It was a good mix of serious and goofy and I liked it a lot. I recommend seeing it, I want to watch it again lol

As a certified Springtrap simp, which backstory for William do you prefer: one where he was a good dad driven mad maybe by jealousy or the loss of his youngest child, or one where he was always an abusive narcisist that cared for nobody but himself?

i feel like the, "im evil so i must also abuse my creations and/or children" has been really overdone. like idk im just tired of seeing it personally. and the whole "haha!!! im craaaazy!!" thing we get in the comics also rubs me the wrong way b/c. thats not. how he's portrayed in the games at all. esp hearing him in sister location he feels like he would be a calm sort of madness. he seems like a rational guy. he doesnt talk like that. he doesnt act like that. it seems really contradictory

i feel like him being a good dad (or at the least caring deeply for his children) gives him more urgency and like,,,,makes sense w/what we're given. it aligns the most w/the theories we have asta why he started killing etc. i also just enjoy the tragedy of it. he started out as a good guy w/good intentions and then was twisted inta something unrecognizable b/c he was so focused on tryin ta reach his goal. personally my hc is that he was jelly of henry and then the death of crying child tipped him over the edge and started his whole killing thing. imo its better than, "hee hoo i was evil FOREVER!! im PURE evil and have always been EVIL!!!" like. okay. wheres the subsistence?? give him depth dammit

why would he build a robot for his daughter if he didnt love her. why would he tell crying child he would put him back together if he didnt love him (not really cemented as something he said, but i mean who else would say it?? certainly not michael he was a boy. i think as a fandom we assume its heavily implied). it makes the afton kid's deaths so much more impactful. the prospect of this man losing pieces of his life bit by bit and being driven insane by it is enthralling

i love a good chaotic descent. i love thinking abt him being consumed w/a need ta revive his own son becoming obsessed w/life and death as a result. oh the irony of loving your own kid so much you would take others children away from them, knowing how losing your own felt. and the twisting of emotions as he sees his son michael someone who he would've died for, try ta stop him. b/c hes not understanding, they need ta b together again. thats all hes tryin ta do. get his family back tagether. and all these fucking obstacles are in the way of his only goal. and the manifestation of hatred of his own son b/c of this. b/c hes getting in his way. like, talk abt juicy. i want that man ruined. it just adds a layer of psychological torture that i just adore. william fucking ruined everything. he ruined his own happy family, he ruined his own life, and if he actually mourns that? chefs kiss.

my thought is, why even have him have a family in the first place if they're just there ta demonstrate he's evil? seeing the afton family purely as a plot device, we already know afton killed kids. one can assume a person who kills kids is a bad person (maybe? see this is where the juiciness comes in w/him caring for his children. is it really bad from his perspective if hes trying ta save his kid? or is it noble?) so we dont need ta b demonstrated ta that hes a bad person again. if hes just pure evil from the get go it doesnt make sense ta me ta have the afton kids be prominent in the story (besides michael, but even then he could probably be replaced by one of the victims family members) when you could illustrate the same point by focusing on the kids hes killed and their families. why do the afton kids matter if he treats all children the same. why are we focusing so much on the afton family and what appear ta b major story beats in their story, especially since the children he has killed do not get as fleshed out as the aftons do. i feel like if his family wasnt important ta him we wouldnt hear abt it at all. you could achieve the same message by making him single and childless.

do u kno how many stories there are of "Righteous Child Of A Horrible Guy Who Hates Everything, Even Their Own Family, Goes Out Ta Stop Their Parent And Save The Day" there are? its b/c its too easy!!! its too easy for u ta assume that a character is the worst and has been the worst forever!!! its too easy ta assume that an evil character would abuse their family!!! its too easy ta assume an evil character wouldn't have traits besides jealousy, hatred and narcissism!!!!

ATLA LA Episode 4 Into the Dark

The glowing rock candy 🤤🤤

Iroh and Aang bonding in prison.

"I'm really starting to see what kind of person his is." "I doubt that."

Sokka yelling at Sai like you yell at your father's mistakes

Love how active the fantasy racism is.

DONT GUILT SOKKA, SAI

Sokka is still so proud of Hakoda. He's so proud to be his son, "My father would never do what you did."

Zuko sneaking in??? We've seen numerous times in the OG his stealth capabilities when he tries. So, I'm excited.

BABY BUMI ! BABY (hes still a baby) AANG !

"I like the parts of Omashu that aren't so depressing :D"

SECRET TUNNEL

Great touch to openly address labor camps and POWs with the real world terms

"It's time to stop fighting. It's time to fight."

The Flopsy statue needs more recognition.

BUMI

Even Aang looks at Bumi like he's insane

Bumi, I know he's your friend, but you shouldn't out Aang like that

"Throw him.... a feast!" Aang looking terrified as if his old friend would EVER hurt him because the world has changed so much since he was last in it breaks me.

"Not everyone out there is the enemy"

"If you stand against us, you are."

"You're fighting because of hate. Just like the Fire Benders"

YES KATARA FIGHT BACK

KATARA THUGGIN AFTER SAYING "Goodbye, Jet"

I love how awful a liar Zuko is in every universe. LEARN TO FIB MY BOY

Aang at the table, like, "did my bsf friend forget I'm a vegetarian???"

Bumi being passively aggressive toward Aang, and Aang serving back "It was a tragedy!"

"Don't you care?" Aang, Bumi has a point when he yells at you. I like this Bumi a lot. His anger feels genuine. However irrational it may be.

THE HIPPIES IN THE MOUNTAIN

Sokka slowly vibing is OOC but still appreciated.

"We're doing what we're doing." They're all high. They gotta be.

Are Oma and Shu...? The gay??

I love how women are often portrayed as ending a war or unintentionally starting it, and then there's Azula.

Thanks for the backstory hippie man, wish you had a map though.

Two lovers, forbidden from one another~

SECRET TUNNEL (×2) THROUGH THE MOUNTAIN

"They're doomed 🤠"

Prisoner cruelty!! I know Uncle War Crimes but what about the Geneva Convention?

"The direct path is not always the best path." Paralleled with Aang wanting to find a way to end the war without killing Ozai.

I hate how they took out Kataang in the LA (i understand it'd be weird to allude to making aang's actor kiss kataras, though), but I like "love" in the tunnels being familial instead of romantic. And I like Sokka using his brain to figure stuff out.

"He was 19.. Was it worth it?" "We were at war.. I was a soldier." Such is the awful reality of war. When it comes to soldiers, it's not personal. It's a job, its dehumanizing to yourself and the rest of the world. It's a politcal game. "You (Iroh) know nothing of loss." And then showing his grief.

Iroh didn't want his son to die a war hero, he wanted Lu Ten to be his son.

!!! This was such an important conversation to put into the show. !!!

Zuko having something from Lu Ten 🥺🥺

I want a separate series with just Lu Ten

Leave from the Vine playing 🥺🥺

Bumi ragging on Aang for wanting to be a kid, AS A TWELVE YEAR OLD, makes me so mad.

Yes, he thinks about fun and games. A boy shouldn't be as bitter as an old man.

Zuko showing up to kick ass for his Uncle because that's HIS FUCKING UNCLE. He's still strong enough to break metal WITHOUT BENDING. SHOWING HIS COMPENTENCY.

"We've all seen enough death."

Zuko showing concern for Iroh's Injury to demonstrate his "true" nature of being sensitive and compassionate. Which is why he was banished in the first place.

The WT Siblings just hold each other before their perceived death feels so important to me.

And I feel like we can and should read into the badgermole/ "Love is brightest in the dark" scene.

"Great, how do you think they respond to verbal commands." Sokka can you be Sappy for like 5 minutes please.

"Some of us have to fight, even if we don't want to. That's what it means to he in a WAR!" This show is delivering so many lines and comments about war and its complexities for everybody involved. Just like the original. Y'all wanna sleep on it because of minor character changes????

I have yet to see a character, Suki has come the closest, that has been so awfully OOC that I've had to stop.

Aang asking for help, "one that requires you to make impossible choices" Bumi is a little misguided here but he means well in sharing his knowledge of leading to his friend.

"Learn what it means to be the Avatar!" "No!" Aang will never give up who he is based on others expectations. And the idea that he doesn't have to do things on his own, "like a child" is going to be what wins the war.

Aangs refusal to kill or hurt isn't bad, he's going to make a difference. He's going to save people. He's going to be the Avatar, but he will be an airbender first!

SAI OUTING THE FIRE NATION IS REDEMPTION

Iroh left to be with his nephew 🥺🥺

He won't let this boy be without a father

LEAVES ON THE VINE

"Everything I need is on this boat"

This episode felt a little rushed, and felt like it lacked a little in terms of the Gaang. But in terms of Zuko, it served. Zuko's story felt stronger here. Especially, after seeing Appa fly away, but he chose instead to prioritize his Uncle.

this is a long post talking about my ocs and my wip. feel free to skip!! i just want to get over my embarrassment of talking about them

ok so. to talk about my ocs first i need to talk about the world theyre in. this is still a nameless wip but for now im calling it 'through the mist' while i decide on a better name.

brief explanation about the world: its the modern world as we know, maybe a few years into the future, but its not very important because society and technology are still pretty much the same. the difference is that in this story, the earth was enveloped by a dark and mysterious mist that is invisible to most people. the origins of this mist is still unknown, but what is known is that: 1) it affects peoples health in the areas that the mist is the most dense, and the number of lung diseases and cancer has incresead ever since it appeared. 2) it has some type of dark magic to it. its essence creates demon-like creatures called spectrums (i still want to find a cooler name) that are unknown by most people, but they bring chaos to the world. you can read more about spectrums and understand them better here (please mind any grammar mistakes, it is still a rough draft!)

but there are special people in the world known as the Enlighted that not only can see the mist, but they are aware of the existence of the spectrums and are given special powers to fight them. most of these people are born like normal humans, and only when they grow up they start to realize that they are different and that theres something wrong in the world they live in. once they find out about their own powers, they are located by a institution called Lux Mundi, and they are recruited either to be a scientist and schollar that studies the mist and the spectrums, or to be a warrior and fight the spectrums.

there are three types of enlighted: the lumen (those who are born with paranormal abilities to help them fight the spectrums), the saltium (those who are born with advanced intellect and are able to understand the complexities behind the magic of the mist and the spectrums) and the granum (those who are both lumen and saltium at the same time. they are very rare.)

this is all you need to know to understand the ocs!! i wont say a lot abt their backstories here so to not make the post even longer but if you want to ask me anything about them, feel free!

btw all of these characters are brazilian and the story takes place in brazil bc well. im brazilian and it was easier this way.

also im not an artist so all i have are picrews 💔 sorry for the low quality of some pictures, for some reason tumblr wont show the album i have them saved in when i open the gallery so i had to screenshot.

1. Kaiki Vitorino, 17

she's our main girl! Kaiki was born Salvador, Bahia but moved to São Paulo with her mom when she was a kid. she and her mom were very close, but due to complications caused by a lung disease, she passed away three years prior to the story, and Kaiki had to move in with her aunt (who also lived in São Paulo). Kaiki is very kind and empathetic, she would never hurt a fly and puts other peoples feelings above her own (sometimes a little too much). she loves geology and has a cool rock collection. Kaiki is a lumen, and her powers are called 'Blessed be The Light', which is basically light manipulation. i won't dive in too deep about their powers here, but you can ask me if you want to!

2. Ayla Rodrigues, 17

Kaiki's best friend since childhood (and secretly love interest)! Ayla was born in São Paulo and met Kaiki in school. she has a very complicated family, which includes divorced parents and a dead younger sister, who died in a car accident with her dad when he was drunk driving. she doesn't speak to him anymore, and grief they dont know how to deal with has led her and her mom to a complicated relationship. Ayla is closed off, aloof and even arrogant to most people. When someone wins her heart however, she shows her more vulnerable side: she's a nerd, loves literature, music and cult movies, likes anime, and will do anything for her loved ones, especially Kaiki, who she is so in loved with is embarrassing. she is a lumen, and her powers are called 'Blesed be the Gravity', which is, you guessed! gravity manipulation.

3. Dandara Carvalho, 20

Born and raised at Lux Mundi, Dandara is the Head Trainer of the Lumen's division. Daughter of Eva Carvalho, supreme leader of Lux Mundi's instalations in Brazil, and Isaac Carvalho, Vice-Supreme and Head Counselour for the Saltium's division, Dara is the real deal: strong, disciplined, determined. she has been training since she was a kid, and her mom has always been very strict when it comes to this. Dara was trained by the old Head Trainer before her, an old man called Kaluanã. He was wise beyond this world, but after his passing at the old age of 80yo, Dara took over his functions. Eva wants Dara to be the next Supreme Leader, but all that she wants is to keep training and teaching other Lumens. They have a very strained relationship, but she gets along very well with her dad. Dara may seem intimidating, but she actually has a heart of gold: she's a dork who loves her friends to death and has a loud and weird laugh. she wont stand for injustice and is extremely reliable. shes also extremely, totally down bad for her girlfriend Yasmin. her powers are called 'Blessed be The Fire', but she also knows a lot of different martial arts.

4. Yasmin Senna

Yasmin may not be very impressive at first, but those who know her know that she is, in fact, a genius. Born and raised in São Paulo, Yasmin has always been the pride and joy of her family: as a kid, she was mostly quiet and kept to herself, didnt talk to other kids a lot and prefered to spend the day cracking her toys open to see how they worked. Her bad social skills and reclusion made her an easy target for bullying in elementary school – kids would take her toys away and mess with her all day long. this lead to a fatidic accident where one day she had a meltdown and unleashed her powers, 'Blessed be the Sound', a type of soundwave manipulation, and left everyone in the scene, including her, deaf. nowadays, yasmin uses hearing aids, but she has long ago gotten used to being deaf, and she doesnt mind her disability, but feels extremely guilt for the accident. she's the grandaughter of kaluanã, daras old mentor, but she had only know him as a kid before he moved to Lux Mundi. this is what made dara want to get closer to her at first, but then they feel in love. yasmin is extremely smart – in fact, she is a granum, but she refuses to use her powers, so she only works in the Saltium division.

5. Eric Senna, 19

Yasmin's twin brother, Eric is probably the only out of the Lux Squad that has decent social skills. He's charming, charismatic, funny, smart and has the world's biggest ego. Eric carries a lot of guilt over the bullying that happened with Yasmin, because he feels like he was too weak to protect his sister, so he has kind of become overprotective over her, even this kind of pisses Yasmin off (and Dandara too). he's one of those people that always act like they're the best, but deep down are their own worst enemy. he's talented, has a hundred different hobbies and speaks three languages. eric is always down for challenges and he loves to prank people. he has a cat and dog relationship with Dandara: they're always fighting and bickering, but they truly care for each other a lot. Eric is a lumen and extremely insecure about his powers – 'Blessed be the Thunder', electricity/lightining manipulation – because no matter how much he trains, his powers doesn't seem to get stronger.

These are the 5 main characters kf my wip! WOW ok this was. a lot. If someone has actually read untill now. thanks a lot, and let me know if you have any questions about anything in my wip or about my ocs! I love to talk about them!! :D

What are your thoughts on how the characters were written for stampede? You sounded kind of :/ about Meryl at one point.

Hello! Yeah it was a bit of a rollercoaster for me personally. ⚠ STAMPEDE SPOILERS ⚠ BUT they really pulled it together in the end i think (for the most part) Since we now know for sure this is a prequel and where its now going after the finale it puts more perspective on things. I have OG Trigun brain so take my own opinions with a grain of salt. I think if people enjoy this new series on its own merits thats wonderful. HOWEVER I still think the series has severe pacing issues and we miss a ton of important character moments imo. And I wish we got to see more interaction with uhh actual humans. After the first 3 eps and then the one with Rollo we basically dont interact with any other humans who live on the planet and its so weird. (also my god we need more fun time in this show was a depression speedrun istg) Have a graph of my emotional journey:

Vash: oh man haha this one is tough. now that the season is over and we got a HUGE payoff with him so I am very happy now but yeahhh. Some parts I was like wow this is Vash he's perfect. But then as the episodes went on I was getting so frustrated. Because he just would stand there giving everyone UwU eyes and not do anything. Especially for his flashback with Knives. Which I understand it was "shock" but he basically stood there with a blank expression the whole time and it was so...??? Being a pacifist didn't mean he is a limp noodle and doesn't take action. Like don't get me wrong he did have a few moments where he fought Livio and the Badlads but that was about it. I think a lot of my frustration might be because he kept using hand to hand combat compared to using his gun which I am used to. again though, they really brought it back in the end 10000% and brought it into perspective so I can forgive some of the previous stuff. Meryl: She was made more cutesy and naïve. Which definitely got on my nerves here and there. But I was okay with it for the most part ( im not immune to cute lol) They got the most important part of her character where she is touched by Vash's convictions, and his love for humanity. She didn't start off jaded and roughened by the planet this time so I think it has a bit less impact in that regard. But I think the best thing they did for her is she is basically the stand in ambassador for humanity and its strength of character. Wolfwood: I don't have to much to say for him personally. but dude needs to have some fun. First ep with him was pretty great but after that was just a lot of angry yelling and nasty looks. Like...for awhile I couldnt even see how him and Vash are friends besides the fact that Vash is nice to him. Him and Meryl almost had more nice moments than both of them. I LOVED finally getting to see more of his backstory though esp with Livio that was so great. But I really wish we got to see how much he cares about kids and him interacting with them. All we would get is NOT THE ORPHANAGE!! but we never get to see it in action really. Besides him giving Zazie a lollypop that one time and the flashbacks but those only included Livio for the most part. Roberto: NGL I loved him he was cynical and grumpy LOL I was pretty offput at first because it felt like he was replacing Milly. I dont think he wasnt really utilized to his full potential though. Especially because he dies later. I feel like we didnt get enough time with him or character moments. I think it could have made his death hit harder. Also just a shame that he was just there to further Meryls arc. But i think he was meant to mirror Meryls drive to help against his pessimism. Milly: millyseason2millyseason2millyseason2!! That's the main group anyway. Thank you for the ask!

i slept all day and im still severely hurty but i think. we're getting there. o|–< im including a readmore to catch up new ppl who are curious bc ive found being open about my chronic pain has helped inform others to their own so!!!! i like sharing

i've had a gradually worsening chronic illness since 2019-2020—it's hard to say for sure when it started, but my physically demanding job at a retail store slowly went from perfectly doable to 'i cant even survive a four hour shift without multiple episodes of hiding in the bathroom just to let some of the pain subside'.

i ultimately had to quit that job in early 2021, and at the time had a writing job that i thought, surely this will be okay! i was wrong. it was so hard to work as consistently as was needed of me. i spent so much time just writing and then sleeping so i might recover fast enough to do more writing. i was ALWAYS late on deadlines no matter how hard i tried.

eventually that job closed down in general, so naturally i lost it, but i know in my heart i would have had to quit within 6 months otherwise. that was late 2021. i've been unemployed since, with no disability because despite ongoing, regular visits with doctors, we dont know WHATS wrong with me, therefore i do not have a diagnosis, therefore i cannot qualify for disability in my area. yippee!

so that's the backstory! i started pain meds last fall and theyve helped A LOT. i can have fun sometimes! i went to pride this year for the first time since 2019!! there's definitely still something wrong, and lately i do believe it's still worsening (at a slower rate than before i was getting treatment at all), but i've gotten through a lot of the guilt for being 'an unemployed, unproductive human being' and have learned how to be kinder and patient with myself. it's not my fault i'm sick. it's not my fault 'my best' doesn't look like other people's. my family loves me not for what i can do for them, but because they just love me.

it's hard to feel your ability to Do Things slip away. how i cant go to amusement parks anymore bc the trip would wipe my ass out for weeks. how i cant even go to a barbecue next door some days bc everything just hurts too much. the simultaneous RESILIENCE you build, the tolerance for your own pain that makes you second-guess if it's even real. it took me so long to realize what i was feeling was NOT normal, that most people don't have to RATION their activities, their chores, their BASIC HUMAN MAINTENANCE to make sure you don't screw yourself over for tomorrow by being in too much pain to move.

today was bad. i had a really stressful day yesterday, and woke up in so much pain it was literally all i could do to sleep. couldn't eat, couldn't go to the bathroom, couldn't sit up, could BARELY speak. it was like my body was screaming at me, "we should be in a COMA right now, we should be UNCONSCIOUS, this is not something humans were designed to consciously endure." and that's WITH 6+ months medical pain management. it genuinely scares me imagining what this would've felt like today if i WASN'T on my meds.

i'm still very in the woods, but i'm trying to make the most of my situation! i'm open to questions if you want to learn more about this, as one of the biggest things that made me realize i needed help was OTHER PEOPLE being open about their chronic condition. it's not pretty, by any means, i've left out the grossest realities here, but i think it's important to share, in case i can do for someone what those people did for me.

thanks for reading!!!! i appreciate being heard on this too. it's scary, i still worry people will think i'm lazy or a crybaby, so it means a lot when people take the time to try and understand.

<3

my chase! lore under the cut: 

33-37, cis male (he him), gay (important to his character development), 6’1”

ah yes, chase. the community’s favorite quote-unquote sad dad. the protagonist of the canon jacksepticeye ego lore. and here he is, last but not least on my list. chase is probably the most complex out of all my versions of the egos. theres…a lot to this guy. i wont talk too extensively about him, but still, hang in there with me yall. major tw’s for like, abuse, suicide, addiction, age regression and trauma responses

so lets start off with backstory. its very upsetting, lets just say that, and im just straight up gonna say his life before the egos fucking sucks. he had a miserable, abusive childhood, he dropped out of school and ran away to live with his sister who then died of a drug overdose, he met stacy in college and just when he thought he had stability in his life, all the stuff he went through seemed to come crashing down on him and he became an alcoholic, depressed disaster. stacy couldnt take care of him anymore as he got worse and worse, refusing to see anyone for his issues, which led to a messy divorce and chase’s 5th suicide attempt. which is where we leave off when chase is brought into the world by jack.

now when an ego is created, they dont automatically have all their memories, and barely know who they are. so it takes a few weeks to get acclimated and “remember” their past life, if they had one. chase, well, he kept getting hit with traumatic memory after memory, especially at night, waking up the other egos with his literally terrified sobbing. even as the memories of his hard life kept seeping in, he was going back to old habits, getting blackout drunk behind jackie and henrik’s backs, getting in bar fights that henrik had to bail him out of jail for. there were panic attacks and screaming at the other egos, and he did this thing where he hid under his bed for hours that jackie and henrik began to realize was involuntary age regression. chase didnt want to deal with being alive anymore, if im being honest. jack wanted nothing to do with him, and jackie was scared jack was going to get rid of him like he did marvin.

and thats where jackie really shines in chase’s story. he was, in his mind, a fuckup that nobody wanted, and he assumed jackie and henrik would give up on him like everyone else. but the thing is, they didnt. jackie, despite his own issues and his own frustrations, never gave up on chase. even when chase kept drinking, even when he screamed in jackie’s face that he hated him, jackie stayed with chase, loving on him even in his worst moments. and really, it sounds cheesey, but all chase needed was someone to love him unconditionally. someone who wouldn’t leave him like everyone else. someone who gave him actual support through his ptsd and his addiction.

and yeah, it took time, but chase put down the bottle and started getting himself back in order. he started going to therapy for his issues (we’ll discuss that in a moment) and actually started putting in effort to be better, because he didnt want to keep hurting henrik or jackie, because he loved them, really he did. he started up a twitch channel, which gave him something to do at first, but eventually gave him a source of income. and he got a dog. very important. chase got an emotional support golden retriever named sunshine. and that dog brings him so much joy every day, just having something to care for and something to get out of the house to go on walks with. he loves that dog a lot.

but with the eventual improvement in chases life theres something else. his therapist. was anti. remember how i mentioned anti was a psychiatrist? yeah that really comes into play here. now ok, in some ways, dr. angus jackson quote unquote helped him. he talked about his trauma, he learned to understand his age regression, he was able to really work through his issues. but that doesn’t mean anti was messing with his head, or getting information about the other egos because he wanted to, or even forcing chase to cry about his past or age regress for antis own amusement, which is obviously very fucked up. chase eventually saw past anti’s manipulation and was able to recognize who he was, which was a terrifying revelation. and after anti…he had a hard time trusting a new therapist.

so in general, chase doesn’t have a lot to offer for the “plot” if you want to call it that to be honest. but i think hes still important, especially to the other egos. he’s constantly battling his mental illness throughout the story, but he has lots of support. he and jackie are best friends, and he loves his dog and his job.

personality wise for chase, hes a big ole softy. he used to be super mean and nasty when he was first born, but he was able to let down his walls and let himself be soft around the other egos. hes real sweet and chill. he likes hugs and is a guy you can hang out with and talk to.

DARKNESS BEFORE THE DAWN.

#FOUGHTBELIEF. // my life is worth the struggle ; my scars are my war paint!

semi - independent & mutuals only post - kh3 & mid - ffxv inspired oc, set in a dnd 5e + gestalt setting. grey horror + existentialism themes.

important notes:

hc#1: light bringer

hc#2: arthur pendraco

hc#3: favorite color (tbu)

hc#4: to know vs to understand (tbu)

hc#5: devilblooded

hc#6: stigma

hc#7: heartbeat (please read)

shorthand rules under the cut + some minor additions:

no godmodding. moving the story along with minor assumptions is fine by me, but major actions and thought processes i'd rather if you left up to me or at least asked how my character would think.

most of my icons are from ai generated images using only my own art. if this bothers you, then i don't know how well we can write together, as i literally subject My Own Stuff to the generations only.

lex's main universe is still under construction, and a lot of things could happen between sessions. currently, it's a very fast-ish start and a slow learning curve, so things may not change immediately. however, when they start to change, it will change wildly and at a fast pace. yay, dnd.

this blog features dark topics, such as child labor, child abuse, xenophobia ("fear" of the other), murder, death, and dealing with grief you didn't know you had. this blog will be mostly silly, but delving into their backstory and talking to them extensively will earn you the tragic backstory rights and civilities.

i am 23 years old and am a veteran of the bigger name fandoms of recent years, so i don't have energy for a lot these days. if you don't want to be here, that's fine, it's not a requirement. i'm here for fun and games and learning from others' writing styles.

please tag all the following as ren dont look or by __ tw. spiders, needles, medical malpractice, sacrificial knives, sacrificial imagery, insects, floristpyre (url), infernalpursuit (url), sexual assault, assault, rape, csa, loud noises

even if you have multiple languages under your belt, which i commend ya for, please have legibility and basic grammar when doing replies for me.

minor addition 1: his main verse is set 400 years AFTER the end of kh3 (current game year is 2419). themes from kh4 will be included when they're released in full, but the story will not be.

rules to be updated if needed.

كسمى chan and Kaoru + Michelle and Michelle only come on don't be shy

i like how nobody will know what kosomy chan is like its funny. anyway put these three in a blender and theyll make neurodivergent smoothie none of them is fucking normal. thoughts on michelle under the read more tho

listen i dont hate her i recognize how important she is to misaki's character and how almost every decision misaki does includes michelle somehow. michelle plays a big part in connecting misaki more to hhw and even her recognising her desire make them happy despite anything. michelle also allows misaki to do things she normally would not do. we saw how shitty misaki is onstage but in the bear suit she can be energetic (and dying of heatstroke). see the event "on days like these..." where misaki says ily back to kokoro after contemplating how she wouldnt have been able to do this without being in the bear suit. it's only when bandori writers decided to write michelle into misakis character like this that she became based. but for the most part too theres still the awfully redundant "whoaaa where did michelle go" joke which then destroys whatever was built by almost ignoring everything that happened in "i need you" where misaki was first reassured by hhw that she's integral to the band as herself and not as michelle. its about what she wants to do and not as an obligation and thats where the development came in. so while i believe that any misaki fan who genuinely hates michelle is a fake misaki fan, i understand how frustrating the inclusion of the character of michelle is especially as a mascot for the whole franchise which can be even disconnected a tad from misaki herself. so thats why the bear is on thin ice. i think what the world (me) needs is one more michelle/misaki centric event story to build up on what "i need you" and "days like these" contributed to their relationship. and yes an important part is that misaki has grown to completely embody michelle's made up character (creating backstories for her, personality, only responding to "michelle" in the himari marie event to "completely become the mascot, the comic where misaki finds herself unconsciously doing things she does in the michelle suit, garupa pico ohmori episode 6.........yeah) like i may be looking too much into this (its a rhythm gacha game its not that deep. slash light hearted) like you can see how much she got to love it and how misaki usually logically gives any excuse to what she enjoys doing except for being michelle. at first it was "it's for the sanbaka" then it became "because i like it". honestly as funny as it sounds garupa pico ohmori ep6 is the most hilarious example of what im saying like this girl is crazy fr by now hope she gets help

Hiiii I'm sorry I've been inactive for a while :/ I'm just less active on tumblr nowadays, and the fact that I can't post when I'm on the site really isn't helping ajshhshd (it doesn't let me add tags from my phone? but TAGS ARE MY LIFE and I can only go on my phone because of the vpn :( )

Anyway I am here!! For chapter 13!!! I'll try to read chapter 14 soon too ajshdhdbd

It is currently 1am so do not expect my thoughts to be coherent

A YEAR ON SOLARIA LETS GOOOOO

Rant on the general? Yes please, I will gladly listen to this

Omg not the meaningful(?) Dreams... (there's a word I'm looking for but my brain is not working I mean like...... dreams what have deeper meanings.... mystic? mmmmmmmmmmmmm I don't know you know what I mean)

Battlefield talks???? Things are PROGRESSING I like this

I understand why people would want her out on the battlefield but also my girl hasn't been trained properly??? Yeah she's learned to wield her fire but it'll take a lot more time to learn how to fight with it

Ah, yeah she's very empathetic and doesn't really deal with pain and death too well, as we've seen before. But also she's also been very open about her patriotism for solaria, so I'm wondering what she would have to say about this

Captain Im's speech ayyyyyy. (No but seriously) she's well spoken and a GREAT fucking debater, she handled that effortlessly

WAIT PLEASE I KNOW YOONGI'S GONNA BE TOO WORRIED ABOUT HER HES GONNA GO ROGUE

He went rogue 😭😭😭😭 this is so fun to watch look at him

“Officer Ryu’s going to give him a little visit and change his mind again.” — OMG PLEASE YES

You doubt it? Well, sir, its going to happen anyway because ✨plot✨ (and you're head over heels for y/n so you have to do what she says, and besides letting your emotions get in the way like this is a HUGE fucking mistake)

Also is this how she's gonna meet jungkook? Cause he's from darlaria.... ajshhxhsbs I should think so much ahead let's skip back (NO BUT SOMEBODY IN THE DARLAREAN ARMY WILL RECOGNISE HER I'M CALLING IT)

Yes, he's in denial. He doesn't want to admit he's in love with a darlarean :(((

Y/n knows she's darlarean right? She just doesn't care... her heart is solarian through and through

HES IN DENIAL THIS IS SO CUTE AJSHXHHXJSJS

Oh :( love and war and death :( YOURE GONNA KILL OFF YOONGI ARENT YOU??? YOU MAKE HIM GO ON THESE LONG SWEET TANGENTS BECAUSE YOURE PLANNING ON KILLING HIM YOUR MONSTER

I'm sorry, I shouldn't assume. bUT IF YOU DO IT I WILL BE AT YOUR DOOR FOR REVENGE

...no it doesn't make sense that she wasn't there? I don't know man I mean shouldn't she have a say in whether she fights?

WHY DID HIS BROTHER SHIFT TONE MIDSENTENCE I- "Am I good enough, brother? 🥺🥺🥺🥺" "Youre good enough for me" :))) "yoUR ENOUGH IS SUBPAR THATS TGE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOU AND ME" ??????????? Mid conversation??? his brother needs help 😭😭

This conversation hurts so much seeing it from yoongi's point of view like.... he's messing up so much right now conversation-wise but only because he's sOFT

Ah... yeah I think jungkook will recognise her and the the story will continue from there

Part of me is like LET THE GIRL FIGHT but on the other hand I DONT WANT HER TO MEET JUNGKOOK.please dear God just let her and yoongi have their love story, I'm sure jungkook's a great guy but live triangles stress me the HELL out and I will cry

Why would he ever care for a darlarean? Wow, it really shows how he's been raised to not even think of them as humans...

THE TENSION OHHH this isn't good for my heart

CAPTAIN MOON'S BACKSTORY HELLO??????? Sweetheart I want to hug you 😭😭😭

Captain moon is spiritual  I can see that, and I'm GLAD we got a meaning to the dream. Y/n is the ✨change✨

FINALLY THE GEM THANK YOU

THATS IT??? I WAS SO SURE IT WOULD B ESOMETBING IMPORTANT AHHHH

Great chapter as ever, love <3 ill try to read chapter 14 soon Have a great day!!

omg no don't apologize!! i can't believe tumblr has the audacity to mess with your tags >:((( ugh

nevertheless, you're here and i have received yet another one of your amazing asks!! (i can't believe you're writing these so late omg 😭 my brain shuts off at 11 these days 💀) but then again, i feel like the best time to read is at night because i'm more prone to ~feels~

ANYWAYS. yes! can you believe it's almost been a year? coincidentally, it's also been almost around a year since i've begun to actually write this series! time flies, doesn't it

LMAO i love writing the battlefield scenes! in the original plot, there weren't as many politics/technical aspects of the war involved, but as i began writing, adding it just felt right LOL

in this household, we love and respect captain im. that is all i have to say

LMAO i like your line of thinking 👀 we will see about your predictions!!! (please don't come for me; i am scared)

yoongi's siblings are... interesting. we'll get into them more in future chapters *wink wink*

the general's too soft for his own good LOL. but we love to see it

captain moon is totally an underrated officer! nobody thinks twice about her because she's always off praying to the spirits, but it's the only connection she has left with her family. a lot of the officers' backstories are tragic. like wait till we get to captain goe's 💀

:)))))) don't worry the gem will come up again <3

and THANK YOU! as usual, for writing such a long review so late at night!! i love reading through your scene-by-scene reactions LOL. it's one of the things that just motivates me to write more! have a wonderful day/night/afternoon!

i love when people are like “oh you have to get into [this fandom] it’s so good” and if you’re like “ok well how do i do that” they’re like “It’s easy you just need to watch 4 movies, one is from 1977 one is from 1979 one is from 2011 and one is a short film but i have a vimeo link for it but it really helps establish an important plot thing. and then theres a comic run but you dont need to read ALL the graphic novels you just need to read #1, #2, #3, #5... okay wait four is SO good nvm you have to read #4 too. okay but before you get into any of that the whole series is based on a series of video games which you have to play in chronological order. the first three games are only available to play on a console that stopped being produced eighty-two years ago when the developers all got drafted into wwii but i think i have a link to download an emulator copy somewhere. and the rest of the games you can just watch let’s plays for but you need to watch multiple let’s plays because there are parts where you have to make different choices. anyway the movies are based on a tv show that actually has your dad’s favourite actor in it! it has 15 seasons but production got suspended in 1347 when the black plague came to europe but i promise it’s REALLY worth watching. oh also if you like this one character theres a book series about him and theyre actually turning the book series into a new netflix animated show starring jonathan van ness from queer eye so you dont even need to read the books you can just watch the cartoon if you wanna know about him! oh but before you watch the cartoon you have to know about that character’s dad’s backstory but it’s fine because my best friend george beard and i have a treehouse where we make comics about the dad and in issue #581 we do a deep dive into his backstory- oh wait but i just remembered it’s kind of spoilery for the video games but it’s okay because it’s technically a separate timeline. the wiki does a really good job of making everything clear and explaining what’s happening in which universe. but obviously don’t read the wiki until after you’ve finished the movies and the comics and the games and the tv show and the books and the tv show and the comics and the games because you might get spoiled for what happens to Qkwadriassian XB-9 Laura Smithson and he’s like my favourite character omg youre gonna love him. anyway after you get into all that i have a really good fanfic i want you to read it’s set in canon but it’s just about two of my ocs. but if you really want to understand their backstory you obviously have to listen to this interview the creators of the series did in 2011 at a convention the panel is one hour long and they spend most of it talking about inside jokes from production but they’re really funny i promise. actually i think the best starting place is the way i got into it which is from this podcast that does reviews of movies and shows and stuff and they did a review of- you know mystery science three thousand? Haha it’s kind of like mystery science theatre three thousand and they did a review of the third movie and it’s like a video review but they talk about other things not just the movie but it’s a really good place to start” and you’re like “yeah man i’ll check that out!”

what would you have liked to have seen done differently?

Not sure if you’re talking about the entire show or just Catra/C//A’s arc, but Im going to assume the latter. Anyway;

More episodes: even though I know that they had restrictions, the show still needed more episodes to cover the things Catra has done and for her to fully heal and develop. (And to cover worldbuilding and other characters arcs) 

Boundaries: They should have set boundaries for how far Catra would go. Adora had been her best friend for their entire lives, yet Catra wouldn’t hesitate to scratch, kick, degrade and manipulate Adora in the worst ways possible. I understand where this loathing comes from, seeing as how Adora had ‘control’ over her life since the beginning (enforced by SW), how she thinks that Adora ‘left her for new friends’, that they were on the opposite sides of a war, and that the Horde influenced her way of dealing with separation and vulnerable feelings but there comes a point when you go too far to be forgiven in the amount of episodes and time they had.

Forgiveness: The Alliance should’ve not trusted and have ‘forgiven’ Catra so easily. She nearly destroyed the planet, she tried killing them multiple times, she controlled(corrupted?) Adora with First Ones tech, she manipulated Entrapta and sent her to Beast Island, she took over Mermista’s kingdom and had probably caused multiple casualties while doing so, and she abused her friend Scorpia, her soldiers, and Adora. Now I’m not saying that she shouldn’t have been depicted doing those things, because the part of being redeemed is being bad, but the way the entire cast forgave her was too quick, and no one seemed to really bring up the things she did and how she hurt them. Adora didnt really seem to talk to Catra about how she hurt her, and instead all we saw was Adora blaming herself for everything while Catra said sorry at least twice without Adora taking a step back and saying; “We can’t be in a relationship now, we both need time to heal. The things you’ve done to me hurt me.” There are other characters other then Catra: Crew-ra had created wonderful and amazing characters, with interesting backstories and arcs that had developed and grew over time. But why did they put the effort into those characters if Catra and C//A was going to be the front and center of S5? Glimbow barely had any development (romantically) other then a quick side-episode where Glimmer apologized for the shitty things she’s done and a “I love you” moment during the last battle, Spinnatossa was there just for a few moments, Micah reuniting with Glimmer was just a few seconds, Hordak barely got screen time despite having an important story arc, dont even get me started on the clones, Wrong Hordak and what could’ve been development between Shadow Weaver and Micah, the arcs a lot of characters had going for them ect. ect. ect. I get that Catra, Adora and C//A needed to develop, but they made too wonderful of characters and too amazing of arcs to just drop it all in favor of shoving them in the corner to make way for C//A and Catra.

Healing: I would’ve liked to seem more healing from Catra, and less of them pilling trauma after trauma on top of her (felt like they did this to gain sympathy from the viewers). Her healing (or at least improving) should’ve started at at least S4 or maybe even towards the end of S3 because of how many seasons they had, and this would’ve made Adora and her’s relationship healthier, because them getting together right after going through all of that…the both of them aren’t in the right conditions to be in a relationship with each other. Catra barely had any time to process what happened to her or heal from it, and Adora had a shit ton happen to her as well. I want healing not a speedrun for a relationship.

More show don’t tell: The thing about Catra’s hair should’ve been brought up. She cut off the lighter brown tuffs after Shadow Weaver left (beautiful symbolism by the way), and the show should’ve had the liberty to show us her cutting off those tuffs. Same with her getting her hair cut by Prime, that should’ve been addressed. Theres also a little bit of a problem with a game of “show don’t tell” with the watchers and “tell dont show” with the characters. Because we see everything that had happened with Catra and the things she’d gone through, while the other characters didn’t, yet we don’t really see Catra telling anyone what she went through (which should’ve been used for understanding with the characters not sympathy).

More SHOWING of healing not SAYING: She said only once that she’d, ”work on her anger issues”, and that was never brought up again. I had an ex-friend that said they’d “work on their issues“ and they still treated me and their friends like shit. And this is just my personal preference but maybe Catra should’ve been less of an asshole to everyone in S5? I get that she went through a lot of shit, but she could’ve apologized for being such a dick such as; “I’m sorry I’m acting this way but I’ve been through a lot, I hope you understand.” (And this shouldn’t be said only once or shown only once)

Holy fucking shit this was long- anyway sorry it’s late, I may have forgot this was in my drafts. If you’ve read this far without getting bored I applaud you

Fringilla’s Tragic Backstory

If we can talk about the tragic backstory for the villain of every piece of media I’m going to do it for Fringilla too. Because this woman has been THROUGH IT. 

For @muslimyennefer​, fellow Fringilla fan

TLDR: Fringilla has a classic corruption arc, comparable to the likes of Eve Polastri, Will Graham, Anakin Skywalker and Morgana Pendragon. She starts out quiet and caring and ends hardened and many might say cruel. Her treatment at Aretuza was terrible and definitely ties into her decision to cut off all ties and fully commit herself to Nilfgaard.

Let’s start out by talking about her personality when she first enters Aretuza. She is shown to be very caring and also very shy. When Tissaia states that Fringilla’s conduit moment was freezing a cat she immediately says she didn’t mean to and then later when they are working with lightning Fringilla is the first one to try and help Doralis.

She is also shown to be one of, if not the most talented mage in their class. However, she receives none of the praise that Sabrina does. In fact, Tissaia specifically sets up the first lesson so that the person who is the most successful at the spell is the one who suffers the consequences because she never tells her students about the dangers of the spell until Fringilla withers her hand.

The worst part of Fringilla’s hand? It isn’t fixed until her Ascension. FOUR YEARS LATER. Tissaia’s “lesson” (which wasn’t a lesson because the students didn’t have all the information) caused Fringilla pain and suffering for four years. Despite her hand, which must have been extremely painful judging by Fringilla’s cry when it happened, she remains the most powerful mage in her class.

You can see Fringilla’s hand both during the lightning scene and during the ascension scene.

It isn’t healed until the ball where Fringilla is dancing with King Virfuril and her left hand is no longer withered.

Once again, I ask, WHY did Tissaia have Fringilla spend four years in pain and suffering by something she directly caused and had the ability to fix?

On this same note, it’s important to note that Fringilla has a similar talent level to Sabrina, she never messes up and she always is at the top. Tissaia praises Sabrina but never does Fringilla to the same extent. In fact, Tissaia treats Fringilla similar to Yennefer where she degrades them both but there is one key difference: Tissaia wants to give Yennefer opportunities in court and wants her somewhere like Aedirn. Tissaia actively wanted to sabotage Fringilla.

When meeting with the council of mages, Tissaia pushes for Fringilla to be sent to Nilfgaard. As Fringilla is one of the most promising mages in her year, this is a very confusing choice. She outright says:

Vanielle of Brugge: King Fergus is proving to be an effective and excitable young king.

Stregobor: Horny, she means. Spending the kingdom’s money on women as his people starve to death.

Tissaia: Fringilla will be in Nilfgaard by week’s end. She will bring sanity and bread to the people.

Stregobor: Your girl is- With all due respect, [to Artorius] your niece is only capable of doing what she’s told.

Artorius: No ambitious mage wants to be assigned anywhere south of Sodden. But Nilfgaard needs correcting. Perhaps we consider sending someone there with a bit more… spine. Stregobor, did you have anyone in mind?

Tissaia chose to originally send Fringilla to Nilfgaard even though she expected Fringilla to basically rot there and have no upward mobility. Everyone agrees that Nilfgaard is a very bad place to be. When Yennefer thinks she is sent there she even tells Istredd:

Yennefer: Can your apology save me from Nilfgaard? Take me to Aedirn? Do they make me more than my blood?

Just to clarify: Yennefer should NOT have been sent to Nilfgaard and there is a whole other post to be made about elven macro and micro aggressions in the Witcher, but what’s important to understand here is that Tissaia specifically chose to send one of her most talented pupils to a kingdom with no mobility and a corrupt king.

As well, during the Ball when Fringilla sees Yennefer go with King Virfuril she looks terrified when she realizes that she is now being sent to Nilfgaard. Tissaia hands Fringilla off to her uncle Artorius Vigo and even though that shot clearly is meant to focus on Tissaia, shout-out to Mimi Ndiweni for going that hard on the acting.

So basically Fringilla was treated like shit for four years despite her talent, then used as a pawn in Tissaia and the overall Brotherhood’ schemes and she is a GREAT example of the characters that get left behind in the hero’s stories. Yes, it is an amazing thing that Yennefer gained autonomy and said fuck you to Tissaia by getting the Aedirn position but we dont often think about the characters that end up suffering becuase of these plot points such as Fringilla.

She was sent to Nilfgaard ill-prepared and we don’t know what happened there, but whatever occurred in the 50 years before Fringilla met the White Flame, it changed her enough that she was able to go from the sweet, quiet and caring girl we see in Aretuza to the hardened mage we see in Cintra.

While she was in Aretuza, Fringilla was belittled and cast aside at every turn. She was told that no matter how talented she was, she would never be supported or taken seriously. Is it any surprise that she turned away from the Brotherhood completely and rejected their beliefs? They rejected her first.

Fringilla has a classic corruption arc, comparable to the likes of Eve Polastri, Will Graham, Anakin Skywalker and Morgana Pendragon. We don’t know what caused her journey from hero to villain in canon because it hasn’t been shown on screen, but I hope they do, it would be very interesting to know!

In the meantime, I love coming up with various theories as to what Fringilla went through in Nilfgaard and have fallen deeper in love with her character than ever.

let’s talk about minecraft diaries rebirth.

and why it’s literally amazing. (warning: this will contain spoilers. lots of them. also, long post ahead.)

i think a lot of people hate mcdr because they were expecting a remake; but the point of rebirth is for jess to rewrite it. it wasn't supposed to be exactly the same.

honestly i went into mcdr with a closed mind. as an og mcd fan, i thought that this was going to suck ass and that i'd rant about how bad it was to my friends later. but actually watching it, i just... couldn't help but immediately fall in love with it.

ik im probably the only motherfucker that likes mcdr, but honestly how could i not? for one, garroth and zenix actually have personalities at the beginning. AND; the villagers? actually amazing. donna made me smile, visher made me laugh and cry, brendan was just bein as good as ever. like... i even didn't despise emmalyn with every ounce of my soul like i usually do?? the characterizations of them were GOOD, man.

and honestly, aphmau like--the way she spoke, her whole thing. it was reallyyy well done in my opinion. she was oblivious to things, but it wasn't overdone and wasn't done in a way to make her annoying. she's a very appealing character in mcdr, a main protagonist i do not mind following along with. her dynamics to the characters are really cool and all very unique.  gonna cut it here so i don’t clog y’all’s feed cuz i got a lot to say :)

the early use of aphmau’s powers was actually pretty cool as well, it also really showed how clueless aphmau really was to everything going on around her. AND UH, THE FACT THAT SHE THOUGHT THAT GARROTH FELT FAMILIAR? GOLDEN. absolutely golden.

AND GENE OH BOY, the early introduction of gene? ik a lot of people are upset about it, but god DAMN i love it so much. his role in the story is very important in original, and i cannot express how much joy this brought me learning that he was actually getting the proper attention for it. and the fact that gene and aphmau were working together?? i mean ik gene was just trying to use her to get back to the "shadow abyss" (pretty pog replacement for the nether, gg) but god DAMN i loved every moment of it. i found their dynamic to be pretty fuckin funny to be honest, would absolutely love to see more of it.

i might be biased considering gene is one of my absolute favorite characters, but i honestly think that introducing gene this early on in the story was a good move. again, he's literally the right-hand man to the shadow lord. it makes you really wonder why he didn't have as much of an important role in season 1 or even 2 of the original mcd plotline. also, we get some of that good-ol-fashioned exposition with seeing early on how vylad and gene interact. vylad’s at a very strange point in the story right now; his motives are unclear, even to the side he’s ‘supposed’ to be taking (aka, a shadow knight.)  another early introduction to a character is zane! this, my friends, is good. really good. i’d say that zane is the main antagonist of season 1 in the original series--and he wasn’t even introduced until like, episode 50. it’s not necessarily a bad thing, but him being introduced this early on really gives the audience a better understanding of what threats are out there and what our protagonist will have to encounter in the future. in the original series, there’s not much explanation as to why lords are disappearing/dying left and right--and while yes, that was supposed to be the mystery of it, having some of that early information is a better move in terms of writing. 

AND IVAN?? BEING A PART OF THE JURY OF NINE?? I COULD NOT HAVE ASKED FOR ANYTHING MORE LIKE GOD DAMN that was a very pleasant surprise i'll just say that, thank you jess :)

and no i did not loop the 4 minutes of screentime laurance got in that one episode haha who would do that i would never do that anyways

SPEAKING of laurance, im so glad jess actually wrote him in this early :) she totally could have just waited for the first time aphmau visits meteli and meets him there, but no! she put him in an early episode. i dont even care if she did it just to shut up the fans about laurance but man that made me so happy seeing him, even if it was only for a bit.

okay i kinda wanna go over the guards real fast firstly; garroth. ignoring how weird the helmet showing emotions is, i really like how garroth is portrayed. he's under a lot of pressure because the village is putting a lot of the blame on him for malik's death, and he's trying his hardest to keep things running. the fact that garroth utterly refused the to take up the position of lord and even got a little snappy about it was actually really cool to see as well. and while he doesn’t have that same “reserved, quiet, observant” feel as the original mcd version of him had, this version of garroth is absolutely awesome. he’s more direct and blunt, is significantly more sarcastic, and isn’t as stiff or as much as a pushover as he is in the original. he even has a sense of humour. also, no homo, but he’s kinda adorable.  plus, the desperation that he goes through during the whole thing is just--it’s really cool to see how hard he’s trying to prove himself and help the village. my rating for mcdr garroth? 9/10. the helmet... the helmet is the main thing throwin me off, i can’t lie. next, zenix. oh BOY do i have a lot to say about this man. first of all, his and garroth’s dynamic is incredible. when i saw how the interacted with each other, my first thought was: father and son. zenix has this immaturity to him that is so fucking fun and interesting to watch, and seeing how garroth scolds him is so fuckin good man. and! seeing how he interacts with the rest of the village... honestly, if jess ever picks this story up again, i would probably cry when zenix (literally) backstabs garroth. HELL, i hope that’s something that still happens, it’d be heartbreaking to witness this character that we’ve come to love hurting his mentor, the man who took him in. he’s just a really good character all in all, and much more appealing than the original mcd zenix. ...except season 3 zenix. no zenix can be better than that one.  either way, zenix is amazing written to be the comic relief and he’s just an all-out lovable character in this series.  finally, dale and brian. yes i’m going to group them up because there’s not much to say regarding them, but i do want to address them. for starters, we have brian; who’s already 16 when the story starts. good on jess for doing that, because in the original aphmau watched brian be born and age INCREDIBLY quick, haha. THOUGH i do feel like there’s a slight connection lost there--one of the hardest things about brian’s betrayal in the original series in the fact that we watched him grow up in phoenix drop. we were there from the moment he was born, to the second he betrayed phoenix drop. BUT OF COURSE, this version is a lot more realistic, so it’s understandable. i just think that if it’s brian who’ll be betraying phoenix drop again (if it even goes down that same route), it won’t hit as hard unless jess really takes the time to grow the connection between brian and aphmau.  as for dale; gotta admit, love it. and like, i think one of the main things about how good of a call it was to make him a drunkard from the beginning is considering how much the village is struggling. the fact that the second-in-command is literally drunk all of the time really conveys the message of, “yeah. this village needs help.” plus, he’s another good comic relief character. i loved seeing molly and dale’s relationship too, it was very funny.  PLUS. we were blessed with a well scene, in which aphmau had to help villagers out of the well. i don’t know about you guys, but that was one of my favorite nods to the original series. i cannot thank jess enough for that, there was a smile on my face the entire time. another amazing thing--visher’s character. instead of just being introduced to this quirky lil merchant who only had one or two interactions with aphmau like in the first one, we got to sit there and really get a feel for someone worth remembering and worth mourning over. we had a reason to be sad over his death, it wasn’t just some npc getting blown up suddenly. this was different, and this hurt.  one of the major things that i hope is to come out of this is for jess to fix the major mistakes she had when writing the first series. she’d expressed how unhappy she was with some of the decisions she made, and i’m glad that she’s getting that second chance to undo the things she didn’t like. this series also gives her a second chance to really, really dig into characters and their motives. like, gimme laurance backstory in better detail. or like, garroth and zane’s relationship from back when they were kids? or how vylad died and who killed him? etc etc. she’s already done an excellent job so far, and i can’t wait to see where this goes. that is, if she ever continues it. god, i wish there were more episodes so that i could seriously let you guys know how beautiful of a series this is. there’s so much i want to say about rebirth, but i think i’ll stop here. i might say some more shit about it later, but if there’s anything i’d want you to take away from this, it’s: give minecraft diaries rebirth a chance. there’s a lot of potential, and this is a chance for jess to really change things for the better! ... but again, that is if this ever is continued.