what if i told y'all i was writing a modern much ado about nothing alenoah fic for noahvember
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writing in discord is just
person 1: [the most devastating horrific angst]
person 1, immediately after sending: womp womp :(
person 2: womp womp :(
2: [answering angst]
1: [yes-ands 2’s angst]
2: AUAUURRRRGHHHHHHSKHRKSHFKSHFKKHDG
1: [more angst]
2: [angsts right back]
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When I was years younger than I am now and online, to those who knew me back then, I'm sorry you didn't get the best version of who I am now today.
But also, to those who stuck around- thank you. It's been so lovely to see you grow along with me. ❤️
& I am so very excited to see where we go from here too! :D
I am merely feeling sappy at 5 am and also cringing at how I spoke/acted back in like. 2019 & before. I dunno who she was, but she's long gone. And for better ( or worse /j) I am here to thrive. ^^
I still have some growing to do, but I believe I am going in the right direction. 💪💪💪 I'm forever going to do what's right, uplifting myself and uplifting others. Supporting those who need it and being someone genuinely good.
And I'm holding myself to that.
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"what did you do all day?"
'oh, you know. i engaged with the concept of my original character in a vague manner.'
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Screaming, like going insane over this
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jo 🤝 me 🤝 arita
going nuts over [REDACTED]
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when i tell you that i’m 4k words into the first chapter of a fic with no signs of stopping
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got myself a small huion bc i really wanna draw on my computer again and my big one is such a hassle to set up….hopefully this will help me
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I have only just watched the sprint back and all I’m saying is… Aleix Espargaro i am moved
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probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.
we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."
at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.
the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.
the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.
what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.
here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.
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