#trolls ocean greens ship
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Grassly(green putt putt troll fan name) x Bliss Marina🍃💗
I was literally brainstorming for my au when I thought of this pair! I don't know what it was but now I love them!
A friend came up with the idea of Ocean Greens as the name for the ship!
#artists on tumblr#digital art#artwork#art#my art#dreamworks trolls#trolls#trolls fandom#trolls fanart#trolls au#trolls putt putt troll#trolls art#trolls bliss marina#trolls grassly#trolls never apart au#never apart au#trolls ships#trolls ship#trolls ocean greens ship#ocean greens ship#trolls crack ship#crackship
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The Legend of the Crimson Flame
Once upon a time, in the majestic kingdom of Eldoria, there was a rare beast adorned with scarlet scales as shiny as rubies gleaming under the sunlight. The creature was a profound creature of myth and fascination—a red dragon with brilliant blue eyes known as Ignis, the Crimson Flame.
Ignis was not an ordinary dragon. His scales, painted in an audacious blood-red hue, shimmered in the Eldorian sun, reflecting a passionate blaze, unlike the traditional draconic palette of green and gold. But the most striking of Ignis's features were his eyes. They were large orbs of sapphire that radiated piercing light, as calm and deep as the vast northern seas. Contrasting the fiery aura projected by his robust figure, his eyes had the calmness and wisdom of the old world.
Ignis remained concealed during the day, hiding in caves etched into the Eldoria's mountains. But as dusk fell and the blanket of twilight descended upon the land, Ignis used to unfurl his wings, each one as wide as a ship's sail, and embarked on his majestic evening flights.
Despite his awe-inspiring appearance, Ignis was not a monster. He had a benevolent nature that contradicted the popular fearsome depictions of dragons. He safeguarded Eldoria from lethal beasts, menacing trolls, and voracious sea serpents. People used to comprehend Ignis's flights as the harbinger of safety, his blazing form against the night sky, a beacon of hope.
However, Ignis's most extraordinary feature was not his physical prowess or astounding beauty but his magical power. The blue-eyed Beast of Bountiful Blaze had a high sense of perception and could understand and converse in the language of humans.
One fateful stormy night, calamity struck. A mighty sea monster, Tidemaw, arose from the dark depths of the Northern Ocean and launched an assault on Eldoria. The city walls, fashioned from rocks and iron, proved futile against Tidemaw's wrath. Desperate and fearful, the Eldorian King, King Eadric, braced to seek Ignis's help.
With a heart bubbling with desperation and hope, King Eadric climbed the perilous mountain path and spoke to Ignis in a language no other human could. The king pleaded, telling tales of mass destruction and looming dread. Ignis, understanding the grim situation, granted the king's request. He flew towards the city, his blue eyes glowing with determination beneath the stormy night.
The battle was fierce and devastating. Tidemaw's tremendous power almost matched Ignis's intense flames. But with every breath, Ignis roared out infernos that raged hotter and brighter, his blue eyes shining like a lighthouse amidst the stormy chaos. Ultimately, Tidemaw was forced into retreat, screeching in torment, fleeing back into the obscure waters from whence it came.
Ignis returned to King Eadric, weary from his battle. The king, however, was not the only one waiting. The people of Eldoria had come forth to cheer for their savior. They hailed Ignis as their protector, and that night, the kingdom celebrated the victory of their "Crimson Flame."
Thus, Ignis, the red dragon with blue eyes, took his place not just in the skies of Eldora but also in the hearts of its people as a protector, savior, and, most importantly, a legend. Forever embedded in the annals of Eldorian history, the saga of the Crimson Flame will echo for generations to come.
#digital art#digital artist#short stories#fantasy#creative writing#writers on tumblr#artists on tumblr#art
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My current list of recurring creatures/peoples from recent Danish folklore:
Basilisk (cockatrice)
Bjærgfolk (mountainfolk)
Brøndmand (well man)
Bukketrold (goat troll)
Bækhest (water horse)
Djævel (devil)
Drage (dragon)
Dragedukke (drawing doll)
Dværg (dwarf)
Ellefolk (alderfolk)
Ellekongerne (alderkings)
Gam (giant bird that lives in the ocean)
Gravso (grave sow)
Grønjæger (the green hunter)
Gårdbo (farm gnome)
Hamløber (skin runner/soul wanderer)
Havfolk (merfolk)
Havtrold (mertroll)
Heks (witch)
Helhest (hel horse)
Helhund (hel hound)
Hyldemor (eldermother)
Kirkenisse (church gnome)
Kirkevare (church grim)
Kludeeg (cloth oak)
Knarkevogn (creaking wagon)
Kæmpe (giant)
Lange mænd (tall men)
Lindorm (lindwurm, sort of)
Lygtemand (will o' wisp, sort of)
Mare (hag/night mare)
Mosekone (swamp crone)
Mælkehare (milk hare)
Natravn (night raven)
Nisse (gnome, sort of)
Nøkke (water man)
Ormekonge (worm king)
Pesttjørn (disease bramble)
Salamander (fire salamander)
Skibsnisse (ship gnome)
Skifting (changeling)
Skovfolk (forest folk)
Slattenpatten (saggy tits)
Småfolk (little folk)
Sømunk (sea monk)
Søorm (sea worm)
Søslange (sea serpent)
Trold (troll)
Valravn (raven of the slain)
Varedyr (protective animal)
Varulv (werewolf)
Æven (venomous little worm)
Åmand (stream man)
Åndemaner (ghost commander)
(not including one-off creatures like Hæslevædder and Ildhund)
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Hey so. I wonder what ur take is on Kanaya and gamzee (not as a ship) in ur personal canon. Do they dislike each other? Did murder stuck still happen?
that depends on the au.....i dont have one ( 1 ) single canon idea so their relationship differs hmm
meteor gang au - there was no murderstuck there. cant say i thought much about where other characters are ( dont think i will unless someone will ask and i will be forced to pull stuff out my ass on the spot cuz i fucking suck at coming up with background ideas(??) ) so their relationship is good here! gamzee is sober and kanaya is happy for him. she offers him tea whenever she sees him getting the nervous twitches.
green babies au - murderstuck did happen there but the trolls along with the kids figured out gamzee was being mind controlled and succeded in killing calliborn. then they all went through the door and got a new start. karkat and gamzee are raising baby calliope, and kanaya and rose had little babygrub. they usually spend like a day a week together cuz the girls like playing together but there is some kind of tension between karkat and kanaya because back in the game kanaya didnt believe gamzee was mind controlled and didnt really help. she also tried to make some of the others give up because ‘‘ That’s Just How Highbloods Are. We Need To Accept That The Laid Back Gamzee Is Gone. He Is Out Of Sopor And We Have To Put A Stop To Him Now.’’ but then calliborn was defeated. and gamzee came back to them ( to karkat ) and spilled everything that hes been through. karkat kept shooshing him and petting his hair, all the while staring daggers at kanaya. so yeah, in this au things are kinda tense and karkat expects kanaya to apologise but gamzee doesnt care. he wont go out of his way to make friends with her but he can kinda see what she meant. he doesnt like thinking about what happened in the game much. plus babygrub is cute and he likes when he and karkat are asked to babysit
commander♦️subjugglator au - in this au things are kinda complicated lol. they did kill lord english but gamzee was still in the fridge after the battle. karkat asked ( begged ) the others to help him look for him but not a lot of them agreed, and those who werent sure got influenced by those who said it was a lost cause ( vriska, kanaya, dave, nepeta ) feferi was the one who said she’ll help because even tho she and gamzee didnt interact much she still saw him as a friend. they searched for a long time ( karkat on land and feferi underwater ) eventually feferi saw the fridge at the bottom of the ocean and pulled it out. gamzee was not in the greatest shape and it took a very long while for him to get better. ( we’re talking like....A Very Long While ) fast forward ===> feferi became empress and made karkat the commander to her army. gamzee has the whole church at his back and they work together to bring other planets down. feferi gave them a whole planet for themselves which they can rule however they want. now the relationship between gamzee and kanaya......its not great lol. gamzee is upset by what happened but thinks that maybe he would have done the same ( he wouldnt ) but he doesnt like dwelling on things like that. says it was in the past and hes not affected by it anymore ( thats a lie ). karkat on the other hand is very hostile and wont think twice before raising his sickle at her.
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Your Muse in 10 Quotes: Ziv Odiz’ Zee
As a OC Ziv does not really has a Quote that defines her beside “Kriff it”, so its just not so random Media here that was used for building her character.
Tagged By: @strongfuck
Tagging: @sithisms @mando-of-esverr @lighthouseborn @peacefaithed @envychosen @starfaithed @lessthantwelve @talesgolden @retrocognizantrecreant @cnlyluck @onehell-of-apilot @skysnipsw @space-hecate @asycuwish @skyler-bane @bewitchingbaker @hopexncarnate @beskar-himbo @ofthestcrs @honorhunt @lady-proudmoore @savior-of-humanity @stillfocvsed @gildedcommander @fallesto @outcaststar @jedilovcd @poewingsdameron @cardinal-carvings @smertzimy @kyberllcore @cfmartyrs @general-kalani @luminousxbeings @thaneirstaer @admrl @notsith @gwiazdowe @lvkexskywvlker @drabbles-n-doodles @preempire @ariadne-inthesky @archaeotech @sxbaist @lightfaithed @trueheartofarebel @protectxthem @hunters-house @masterofthelivingforce @startrailed @bladelancer @wartornpilot @hosnianleft @rcfekjwtaardby @sithdestined @safrona-shadowsun @stubborn-amphibian @ncxile @skywlkrr @jedixamidala @chromium-siren @aetcrnus @savesgalaxy @bountyborn @memcriaes @2sabers @creaticn @thestupidmeanone @fatewills…and everyone else who blinked today!
“1. Organize before they rise!
2. They feel no fear, why should you?
3. Use your head: cut off theirs.
4. Blades don't need reloading.
5. Ideal protection = tight clothes, short hair.
6. Get up the staircase, then destroy it.
7. Get out of the car, get onto the bike.
8. Keep moving, keep low, keep quiet, keep alert!
9. No place is safe, only safer.
10.The zombie may be gone, but the threat lives on.”
From The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead by Max Brooks.
“Every so often, the Universe must just get bored and decide to really cut loose.”
From Red Harvest by Joe Schreiber
“Will Ossai be well?”
“Hmm, He is what the Mosspeople call a ´Unseen´. With the knowledge of the earth, ground and greens he can move through any area without beeing noticed. If he does not want your Clan to see him, Your Clan will not see him. Of all people, don´t fret for Ossai, Laghou, he will be well.”
From Neandertal Vol. 3 by Emanuel Roudier
“Ah,I remember you. Sylvanus, right?”
“Seianus!”
“Hard to forget the last four letters of your name.”
From Les Aigles de Rome by Emmanuel Roudier
“It was disorienting. Beeing thausand of miles away from anything familiar was strange enough. But Courtney didn´t even feel she had a Home to return to. She felt like a lost ship after all the continents had sunk under the sea...wondering if there were any other ships out there on the endless, empty ocean.” From “Courtney Crumrin Volume 4: Monstrous Holiday″ Written by Ted Naifeh.
“So I got to figure out a way to grow three years’ worth of food here. On a planet where nothing grows. Luckily I’m a botanist. Mars will come to fear my botany powers.” From The Martian by Andy Weir.
She looked at him and shook her head. ‘I feel like a hulder.’ He’d heard the word before, in Norway. ‘Aren’t they a kind of troll?’‘No they are mountain creatures, like the trolls, but they come from the woods, and they are very beautiful. Like me.’ She grinned as she said it, as if she knew that she was too pallid, too sulky and too thin to ever to be beautiful. ‘They fall in love with farmers.’
‘Why?’
‘Damned if I know,’ she said. ‘But they do. Sometimes the farmer realises that he is talking to a hulder woman, because she has a cow’s tail hanging down behind, or worse, sometimes from behind there is nothing there, she is just hollow and empty, like a shell. Then the farmer says a prayer, or runs away, flees back to his mother or his farm.‘But sometimes the farmers do not run. Sometimes they throw a knife over her shoulder, or just smile, and they marry the huldra woman. Then her tail falls off. But she is still stronger than any human woman could ever be. And she still pines for her home in the forests and the mountains. She will never truly be happy.She will never be human.’From “Monarch of the Glen” by Neil Gaiman.
When the barber-surgeon peeled the dressing from the wound. Rittersporn groaned pitifully. 'Relax,' Regis said, cleansing the wound. 'It's nothing. Only blood. Only a little blood... Your blood smells nice, poet.' At precisely that moment the Witcher did something Milva would never have expected. He walked over to the horse and drew a long Nilfgaardian sword from the scabbard fastened under the saddle flap. 'Move away from him,' he snarled, standing over the barber-surgeon. 'The blood smells nice,' Regis repeated, not paying the slightest bit of attention to the Witcher. 'I can't detect in it the smell of infection, which with a head wound could have disastrous consequences. The main arteries and veins are intact... This will sting a little.' Rittersporn groaned and took a sharp intake of breath. The sword in the Witcher's hand vibrated and glistened with light reflected from the river. 'I'll put in a few stitches,' Regis said, continuing to ignore both the Witcher and his sword. 'Be brave. Rittersporn.' Rittersporn was brave. 'Almost done here,' Regis said, setting about bandaging the victim's head. 'Don't you worry. Rittersporn, you'll be right as rain. The wound's just right for a poet. Rittersporn. You'll look like a war hero, with a proud bandage around your head, and the hearts of the maidens looking at you will melt like wax. Yes, a truly poetic wound. Unlike an abdominal wound for instance. Liver all cut up, kidneys and guts mangled, stomach contents and faeces pouring out, peritonitis... Right, that's done. Geralt, I'm all yours.' From Chrzest ognia by Andrzej Sapkowski
“Yet here I am, Zahara thought now, queen of her own miniature kingdom, after all, duchess of the empty bunks, and our lady of the perpetual stomachache. Involuntary lust-object of a hundred emotionally frustrated prison guards and deprived stormtroopers. Dispenser of medicine, charged with keeping the inmates of the Imperial Prison Barge Purge alive long enough to be permanently detained on some remote prison moon.” From Death Troopers by Joe Schreiber
“Medicine is the opportune application of poisons. Healers and poisoners are folks with similar skill sets and wildly different philosophies. “ From a Tumblr Post answered by Dandelionwitch.
#I said it before and I say it again : Marcus Valerius Falco gives the best burns in the whole Varusbattle#headcanon#irrfahrer#Ziv Odiz' Zee
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Because K is a very ballsy mo7herfucker...
Here's my s7uff :)
My name is Koli7a Sehe7e, I'm abou7 19 human years old and I don'7 have a sign because I'm a mu7an7-blood.
My 7ype of blood is labeled as Seafoam Green, bu7 i7 looks like cyan if I'm in 7he deep par7s of 7he sea. My lusus is KrakenDad, a very large Kraken (gian7 squid) bu7 he's no7 as big as Gl'bgolyb (7he fuchsia bloods' lusus), he's s7ill big 7hough. I'm abou7 8 fee7 7all bu7 I'm close 7o 9 fee7 7all, my skin is darker because I live in 7he deep bu7 I glow na7urally via bio-luminescence which I could con7rol if I need 7o go hun7ing for food. Also my hair can move like 7en7acles, which is nea7.
(At this part I'm not going to use my typing quirk so you could understand my story, and also cause I'm lazy)
Since seadwellers are considered royalty on Alternia, nobody knew what to do with me when they found out I was a mutant blood so by the rule of the fuchsia blood, I was cast into the ocean so I could be some beast's next meal but as I sank deeper into the ocean, I was saved from death by my lusus. He was as rare as I was, living a life in solitude to avoid getting hunted and being notorious for sinking ships and defending the deep.
Besides, no other seadweller could reach the deep without hurting in some way but due to my special genetics, I managed to survive.
In the deep inside a cave that had the ruins of a castle, I was raised and loved by just my KrakenDad, who taught me of what I know now and the unfortunate beginnings of my life. I was supposed to be royalty but life gave me the short end of the stick, however he taught me that it wasn't all bad. I learned to communicate with other sea creatures, befriending a catfish I named Flippers who could surprisingly also survive in the deep. How? I don't know but I went everywhere with him.
Ever heard the saying 'A princess who isn't saved is doomed to become a witch'? I basically fit that description, finding truth in the dark when I was shunned by the light.
I will be honest now, I'm terrible at socializing with other trolls so I befriend fish and other sea creatures who don't want to kill me like my friend Flippers.
Nowadays, I'm the witch you would find in every fairytale, but my intentions aren't to curse and be cruel.
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Doing some rambling... while sorting thoughts.
A few things about Archivisors...
There are never more than one at a time and if another troll of the caste appears, the previous one tends to disappear via mysterious means.
They typically say the previous one "retired" despite not actually knowing what happens.
All Trolls of this blood caste are female, a mutated form of Fuschia and are obviously seadwellers. However, their appearance and blood colors never follow the natural hemospectrum... or to put it another way, all blood colors of trolls of this caste are of the Extra-Spectral variety. Like Stygian Blue, metallic green, or... pink for that matter. Pigmentation is more of an indication of which horrorterror's essence caused the mutation and not their status.
Those horrorterror traits tend to become increasingly prominent over the troll's abnormally long lifespan with it eventually culminating in them looking more eldritch than troll by the time the next one comes along.
While artificial means of observation such as through a camera or photograph is technically "safe", it is actually quite difficult to look at them in person as they carry that same incomprehensible aura.
Typically, only the Empress and Heiress even knows they exist at any given time and functionally, they work as an Arbiter, Advisor, and Archivist.
Alternatively, the only troll allowed to tell the Empress no and lecture her on the proper use of a wooden spoon, interfere with court proceedings and then get the judge assassinated on a whim, record the whole thing, copy as many books as she wants, and just plain get away with it.
Or Troll Google with a working fact check, Alternian Shadow Government, and the curator of the one and only doomsday archive that mostly exists just in case the Empress accidentally kills everyone by forgetting to feed her Lusus and they need to start over.
She's pretty much capable of explaining to a Purple Troll where they can find the best blue paint, the source of said paint belonging to a known troublemaker and confiscate the troll's belongings for future reference without anyone noticing... all at the same time.
Pretty much all of their belongings are hand-me-downs inherited from the previous Archivisor. Hive, clothes, grubtop, etc... all from the troll that came before. If they want anything new that is theirs, they have to figure it out on their own.
There is never more than one at a time.
All conspiracy theories tend to lead to the Archivisor eventually. This is both because they usually are started by the Archivisor for fun or function. It's just as much her job to cut rebellions short as freaking everyone out about rumors about a "ghost ship" being seen in the ocean. Information and misinformation are part of the job description.
Taking into account the insane level of security, the Archivisor's hive is pretty much "Troll area 51" and a favorite topic on Trollian chat rooms... Especially since just trying to get close to the place is a death wish.
Technically, it is and isn't the Archivisor's fault as it's just as likely that her predecessor rigged up the security and they have no idea how to work it or they put it up themselves in an attempt to further protect the precious contents of the archives.
It also makes getting anything from outside the self-sufficient facility very difficult. Like... you order pizza and the delivery guy, and the pizza ends up on your worktable full of holes.
As such, she usually has to take care of most of her needs by herself... and try to find other means to obtain personal goods by proxy. Also, very difficult to have company for that matter.
_
As for Kenous and her Predecessor.
Alternia: Kenous and Predecessor
Beforus: Successor and Predecessor
Due to the generally anomalous nature of Archivisor Trolls, outside of the Predecessor in Alternia being the same as the Successor in Beforus, the identity of the Predecessor in Beforus is unknown.
_
Her Predecessor by the end of her long career was...
At least a bit older than the Empress herself.
At least 8 or so meters in height.
Had tentacles for hair, twisty horns, and magenta blood.
I'd say that she was fashionable for her time, but it's hard to tell when she could change what fashion was any time she wants.
Top of the line equipment... custom made for her giant hands.
Liked to write all of their notes in code with said tentacles, resulting in a particularly unique form of penmanship.
Might have had some involvement with Doc Scratch.
Let's just say that her predecessor and the Empress got along like two peas in a pod, resulting in a very permissive, manipulative, and just plain toxic relationship.
Her Beforan counterpart would pretty much be Meenah's favorite co-conspirator and... maybe condoned her behavior while fully knowing how bad things were going to go.
Also, admittedly, she was about as bitter about her role as Meenah was about her own.
Or to put it another way, she egged her into it while knowing entirely they'd fail the session... just because she liked seeing things burn.
_
As for Kenous...
About Feferi's age for reference.
Maybe about 2 meters tall
Mess black hair, roughly four to six straight horns of different lengths, and void black blood.
As she is still pretty new for the job, she mostly sews her own clothes from scraps of her predecessor's clothes.
Can't use her predecessor's new PC, so she's stuck with a grub top with a bunch of missing keys and a cracked display and a terminal that is pretty much nigh useless and is really only good for spying on people.
Considering she had been effectively dropped in her role with no instruction, guidance, or idea of what she's supposed to be doing... finding everything in the gigantic hive takes awhile.
She's got no idea who "Mister White" that sometimes sends messages on the terminal sometimes. Seems pretty polite if long winded.
Her relationship with the Empress in the short time is rather strained and tends to lean towards Feferi and finds her easier to interact with in comparison.
Admittedly, her and the hive going "poof" during the great glub and the poor response times to her messages likely didn't help with matters.
You could also point out that her absence indirectly led to the Empress doing what she did to Earth later. Of course, knowing her predecessor... that was likely planned out in advance.
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lure: dune fic excerpt
another excerpt of the dune fic i’m working on. if you want to be tagged re: updates or the actual posting of the fic, let me know!
i’ve never been deep sea fishing in my life, so if i got anything wrong about this, also let me know. :)
@migwayne
# # #
When you know you’ve gone far enough, you spill wind from the sails for a bit, slowing the ship until you're at a good pace for trolling. You lean over the edge of the boat and stare into the rippling depths.
“What?” Paul asks.
You shrug.
It's a good spot, you know it, and you don’t think to explain that to him. You’ve never had anyone to explain that to. He looks at you though, his green eyes wide with confusion.
“Is there something here?”
He stands and you brace for him to set the ship off balance. Instead he adjusts to the easy pitch and lull of the boat. So he’s been on ships before, enough to have sprouted a pair of sea-legs. While it’s true you could say that about eighty percent of Caladan’s population, you still appreciate that he’s not going to tip over the boat being clumsy.
“Is there something here?” he repeats, looking out over the waters.
“Fish,” you say, because isn’t that obvious?
He frowns at the glassy black water.
“I don’t see anything.”
You sigh.
“They’re in the water. That’s why we fish for them.”
“I know that,” he says. “I just thought -- is there some kind of trick to this?”
“Maybe?” you say.
You’re focused on pulling rods out, from where they’re stowed in the locked trunk at the stern. You’ve decided on trolling since that will give you time to talk to him, though, you wonder if that’s actually something you want to be doing. Maybe you’d rather have him shut up and enjoy the quiet of the ocean.
Kneeling in the boat now, you feel that prick of shame you always feel when you bring out your rods, line, lures, the heavy trolling leads. This is where, after food and household necessities, most of your money goes. By the light of the oil lamp the line glistens like spiderwebs, but it’s strong enough to reel in a 90 kilograms of thrashing tuna fish. The rods, too, are robust, but sensitive. You used to skimp on rods, thinking that you didn’t need them to be so responsive, so flexible, that you could angle the fish just fine yourself. You finally snapped enough of the cheap ones that you decided to invest in the more expensive ones. You ate rice for weeks but the finer rods have proven their worth time and time again, allowing you to do the difficult and delicate work of wrangling fish in with greater ease and agility. The trolling leads roll around, hardly costly. But the lures, well. The lures are gaudy. In the lamplight they shimmer brightly like a cache of jewels: pink, olive, silver, even some purple and aquamarine.
Picking the little pink squid, you tie it to a line. Standing, you drop the line in the water alongside the starboard side of the ship. Squinting by the light of the oil lamp, you watch the movement of the lure, stuttering and shuddering through the water. You frown.
“What?” Paul asks, hovering over your shoulder so that you nearly bump into him when you turn.
“Get -- out of my way,” you snap.
Paul looks hurt but moves so you can adjust the sails. The boat picks up speed a little. You squint at the pink squid in the water and nod.
“What?” Paul asks again.
“What what?” you say.
“What are you doing?” he says.
“What do you mean?”
“With the lure and . . . ?”
“Oh,” you blink, looking down at the lure, now zipping happily through the water.
“The lure didn’t look . . . squidish. So we had to go faster. It has to look like a squid or else the fish won’t come and bite it.”
“Oh,” Paul says.
“Now that we’re at the right speed I can set up the rods,” you explain, feeling absolutely stupid for doing so.
Because this shouldn’t need explaining. But Paul isn’t a fisherman, you remind yourself.
The first rod you set up in silence, quickly and efficiently, placing it in its holder at the stern. Paul mostly stays out of your way, though his eyes and face burn with curiosity. As you begin the second rod you remember again that Paul isn’t a fisherman.
While you ready the second rod, you mumble to Paul, about the line, securing the lead and the lure. You’re in the middle of selecting the lure when Paul stops you.
“Can I pick one?” he asks, reaching out.
You slap his hand away, more a reflex than anything.
“No,” you say. “You wouldn’t know what to pick.”
“Try me,” he says, sounding so outright snooty you almost laugh.
“Fine,” you gesture to the lures.
He bends forward, fingers brushing yours. You both pause. His fingers are fine as filaments. They are so delicate as he runs them across the lures. They should be graced with glittering, magnificent rings, you think. The kind encrusted with gemstones that nobility wears. Not teasing your coarse, lumpy fingers, which look like they’re made of clay.
“Careful,” you say as his fingertips taunt barbed hooks.
His fingers curl around a lure shaped like a small silver fish.
“This one,” he says in your ear and you shudder.
“Not that one,” you say gently.
Instead you lead his hand to the vivid green skirt with the clear thimble shaped head.
He seems satisfied, though probably not in the choice of the lure.
#beyond the endless ocean#mre fic#mre fanfic#paul atreides#paul atreides x reader#paul atreides x you#paul atreides x male!reader#paul atreides x trans!reader#dune 2021#dune movie#excerpt
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Little Sea - Part I
AN: This is my first time writing outside of The Last Kingdom fandom, but I originally joined tumblr to find Hvitserk content. So I hope my writing for him does it justice. This is for @deans-ch-ch-cherrypie Congratulations on your milestone love! This story is a Vikings/TLK crossover but Sihtric is basically placed into the Vikings universe. I know in our heads these two belong in the same universe, so enjoy. My prompt was a reimagining of The Little Mermaid fairytale. The story got too long so I am breaking it into two parts. Sjór means sea in Old Norse, at least according to one website I found. I have more notes at the end of part two.
Warnings: Angst, unrequited love, suicidal imagery/implications, Vikings canon Ivar cruelty
My Masterlist
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She swam, racing the currents in the sea. The water’s hazy depths constantly shifted and mottled in a swirling dance. Hues of blue and green mixed with inky darkness but faded to the rays of the sun’s light filtering through from the surface.
The cold temperatures below the fathoms began to warm as Alba swam towards the surface. Swishing her fins, she felt the drag of the water as she climbed higher until slowing and ultimately stopping herself just before breaching the surface.
His face stared down at her above the water. His lips spoke words that she could not hear. His face was calm and serene. Happy.
The only sound was the rushing tumult of waves breaking, crashing upon rocks at the base of a cliff.
Alba flicked her tail trying in vain to break through the surface. She wanted nothing more than to rise above the water and envelop Hvitserk in her arms.
The fear and the panic began to rise instead. And without warning, Alba felt her terror intensify as her tail had been replaced with two legs. Hvitserk’s face grew farther and farther away while she sank back below the dark depths.
~~~~~~~~
Alba woke with a start, sitting up in her bed and breathing heavily. Her hands clung to the furs draped across her, pulling them aside to reveal two legs and feet. The sight still seemed surreal to her.
This was not the first night she had awoken from this dream. It was occurring more and more often as she felt the pull to return to the sea. Return home. And as she watched Hvitserk continue to move further and further away from her.
Slowly, the young woman stood from her bed steadying herself as her legs wavered like someone returning to shore after living on a ship for weeks. She draped a cowl of furs around herself and pushed aside the door leading from her small hut on to the beach.
Only a few paces brought Alba up to the water’s edge. The waves lapped over her toes and Alba breathed easier. Salty spray drifted across the cove where the waves were always harsh and ragged against the cliffs to the north.
Alba trained her eyes on the grey horizon, watching as the mist began to fade and the shadows melted away. She breathed in the taste of the ocean’s air and for a moment felt content.
But that moment was broken when she noticed a set of forlorn footsteps approaching her.
“I knew you would be up and on the beach already.”
His voice was low and groggy as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders with a gentle squeeze. Alba wondered if he had seen his own bed that night.
“I wish I could help you find whatever you are looking for on the water, little Sjór.”
Alba turned her face ever so slightly to question him with a silent gaze. And to see his braids looking disheveled. And a small bruise just under his jaw.
“When we met, it was not unlike this,” Hvitserk paused when Alba turned her face towards him fully, furrowing her brow in confusion. “I mean it was very different because I still have no idea how a half drowned young woman came to be lying between the rocks on the north edge of the cove, covered by nothing but a ragged boat sail,” his lips had pursed slightly trying to ward of the smirk Alba knew he was fighting. Shuffling his feet in the sand and clearing his throat, he continued, “so it was different but you also still had that look I see so often. The one you had moments ago. Like you’ve lost something. And you’re waiting for it to return to you.”
Alba turned her eyes back to gaze across the water before dropping her face to the sand with a huff. “Looking for your voice, perhaps?”
Alba looked up with her mouth dropped open in shock to see the young man grinning fully while she pushed him lightly away. Hvitserk let out a true laugh before wrapping his arm once more around Alba’s shoulder. Comfortable and brotherly.
Scuffing a bare foot in the sand, Alba moved away from his side and began ambling down the beach knowing Hvitserk would follow.
It was no use trying to hold that one sided conversation again. Part of the enchantment prevented her from revealing the truth about where she came from, about what she was…is…would be once more. So even if they played a crude pantomime game, she still could not reveal if his guess were to be correct.
Her time on land was almost spent. Her time with him would come to an end. Alba knew in her heart that Hvitserk was not in love with her. And the binding nature of the enchantment would not bend. No matter how much love she felt for him. Or how much she had become endeared to him. That was not the problem. He did love her. But it was not true love. Not for him. So she would return to the sea, but not today.
Alba sighed, straightened her shoulders and raised her head, breaking herself from her thoughts.
She turned to look at Hvitserk walking alongside her, scuffing his boots beside her bare feet. Gently, Alba reached out her hand and tapped his neck where she’d noticed the small bruise.
Hvitserk met her eyes with a mischievous smile.
“Oh that, there? That is nothing, little Sjór. Only a slight bite I received from one of the forest trolls while I was searching for mushrooms.”
The pair laughed at his jest, her silently and him with gentle chuckles before he continued, sincerity beginning to lace its way into his words.
“I was with Thora last night.”
Alba arched an eyebrow at him.
“Yes, again.” Hvitserk chuckled lightheartedly. He missed Alba’s eyebrows relax and the smile on her face fall as she listened to him talk about the new woman.
~~~~~~~~~~
Alba woke to the sound of rain pelting the thatch roof of her small cottage. Sleepily, she opened her eyes just as a streak of lightning illuminated the sky. She had seen the flash through the leaking cracks of her shutters.
Several moments later the booming echo of Thor’s hammer against the clouds brought a slight curve to her mouth. A rain storm was dangerous on the water. Perilous. But under the water, Alba and her sisters had been fond of watching the crash and roll of the tumultuous waves. The lightning scattering crystalline lights across the surface of the water. A beautiful orchestra of light and movement.
A rain storm did not startle her. A rain storm felt like home. Alba nestled further down into her furs, feeling their weight and warmth bringing her back to sleep.
Except this thunderous booming continued on far longer than any true thunderclap. And it was now accompanied by a muffled voice.
Hvitserk.
No one else ever came to her door. Barely another soul knew she even existed or much less where she dwelled.
Alba opened the door to a torrent of rain blocked only by Hvitserk’s tall frame.
For a moment, they stood staring at one another, the rain continuing to sleet down on them.
In the dark, Alba could barely make out the features of his face. She searched his face, her eyes questioning. But only for a moment before Alba grabbed his arm, ushering him inside and closing the door.
In two strides, Alba moved across the room to gather up the furs from her bed and drape them across Hvitserk’s shoulders then settling him down on the short bench next to her cookfire. Alba stoked up the flames from the low burning embers before turning on her knees to look at him.
Beads of rainwater still tracked down the strands of his hair that had come free from his braids and he had made no move to wipe the dampness from his face.
He met her eyes as he spoke, “It’s Ivar,” he stated simply.
Alba shuffled closer to him and placed her hand on his arm, atop the furs.
“He is sending me as his messenger to King Olaf. In Norway,” Hvitserk paused to turn his head. He clasped his hands together while bringing them up to rest against his mouth. He was staring off towards the other side of the room. His next words were muffled against his fist.
“I don’t know what my brother thinks he is going to do,” he chuckled then continued, “my brother the god king.”
Alba starred while Hvitserk worked through whatever thoughts were raging in his mind. Increasingly in the past weeks, Hvitserk’s worry over his brother’s rule in Kattegat had grown. Though he did not often openly criticize Ivar, it was clear to Alba that he carried many burdens for his younger brother. Burdens that left him questioning his path and his fate. And questioning the path his brother was forging.
The young woman scooted herself closer to him and placed her palm against his cheek, lightly pulling his face back to meet hers.
She saw the torment and frustration in his brow. It was mirrored on her own face. She opened her mouth but could only huff and furrow her brow more. Sighing, Alba looked around the room, searching for everything and nothing before finally settling her eyes back onto him.
“Even if you had words, little Sjór, there are none you could speak that would save me.”
At this, Alba felt her face shift from frustration to concern, her eyes frantically searching his face for more answers.
“I must do as Ivar bids. And I leave you behind to deal with Ivar’s tyranny. His madness.” Hvitserk dropped his head into his hands, continuing to talk. His words came more easily now as his emotions boiled over. “And my love, Thora. I leave her behind but she does not have the anonymity you do to protect her. I fear for her. I fear what Ivar may do to her while I am away.”
Hvitserk hung his head and sighed heavily. Alba felt her chest stutter as she realized she was holding back tears. He truly did love Thora. And Alba could not help herself from liking the young woman as well.
Hvitserk had brought Thora to the beach to meet her one day. And though it made her heart ache, Alba could not deny that she saw the love that was blooming there. From the casual way that she saw their bodys lean into one another to the way Hvitserk watched Thora when she did not know he was watching. While Alba was watching him. That night, she had cried silent tears alone on the beach, while the ocean’s mist cried with her. And the ache in her chest now was the same.
Trying her best to quell the sobs threatening to escape her lungs, Alba shifted herself once more to sit beside him on the bench. Gently, she cradled him in her arms and stroked back the strands of his hair, now drying by the heat from the fire. Hvitserk hugged her knees and closed his eyes for a moment, taking comfort from the care and love in Alba’s touch.
“I will miss you while I am away. I know you enjoy your solitude. But if you can, keep an eye out for my Thora. Ivar has made comments. Said things that make me fear she may be a target for his frustration. She sees how dangerous Ivar has become. It threatens him.”
The more Hvitserk continued on, the more Alba’s heart continued to tear. Her prince's concern and worry was for another. He was in love with another. She let out a silent sob, but laying in her lap, Hvitserk felt the jolt of her body. The pain she could no longer hold back.
Sitting up, he questioned, “What is it, Sjór?”
Alba closed her eyes and felt the tears cascade down her face as she shook her head.
Hvitserk took her face in his hands, turning his body so that he straddled the bench. The furs around his shoulders dropped to the ground, forgotten.
“Hey, hey look at me?”
Alba opened her eyes to see concern etched across his features. Silently cursing her tears, she pushed his hands away and stood, wrapping her arms around herself and stepping away towards the door. He was tormented enough and did not need to add her pain to his. A pain that she could not explain to him.
“Sjór, I….” He started, standing to face her and grabbing her arms, firm but gentle. His words fell silent as he watched the tears continue to track down her cheeks.
Huffing in frustration, Alba wiped the tears away. The two stood silent except for Alba’s shaky breaths for several moments.
Finally, Alba brought her fist up to thump against her chest. Over her heart. Gathering her courage, she took her fist, relaxing her fingers and placed her hand over Hvitserk’s own heart. And then brought her head to rest against her hand, feeling his breath and the questions in his stance.
Taking a step back and removing her hand to wipe another stray tear, Alba met his eye. With more force she took her fist to thump against his chest. In the same spot, over his heart.
Looking down to her hand, Alba tapped her fist against him once more then brought her hand up and pointed a single finger towards her window. Towards Thora, towards his love.
She watched as Hivitserk’s brow, a deep line of confusion, slowly relaxed. A look of realization spread across his face.
To then be replaced by something more unbearable.
Pity.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bare feet found their way along the soft mosses and lichen carpeting the ground up the paths surrounding the northern side of the cove. Alba stepped slow and deliberate, feeling the air growing cooler. The spray of the mist off the sea left salty pin pricks of water glistening across her bare arms.
Low in the distance, the rumble of thunder rolled. As she crested the height of the cliffs, Alba found the crash of the waves joining in the thrum of the oncoming storm. The energy in the air was mounting. Mirroring Alba’s rising anguish.
Thora was dead. A cruel and horrifying death.
Ivar was rampaging. His madness was building and unstable.
And Hvitserk. Her sweet Hvitserk was gone. If Ivar was to be believed...If what he said was true, he was lost. Dead at the orders of King Olaf.
Alba fell to her knees at the cliff's edge. Her hands gripped tight onto the sharp rock’s edge. The rough surface painful and grating at the pads of her fingers. She clung to the edge. Her eyes staring down at the waves below. The maelstrom of the waves calling to her. To end her suffering. End the anguish and pain.
Alba stood, the wind whipping her dress as the rain began, drops gently splattering across the terrain. The young woman looked up towards the clouds and closed her eyes, feeling tears spill over across her cheeks.
Silently, Alba let the anguish wash over her. Knowing he was lost. And the sea was calling her to return.
Alba’s time on legs would soon be done. She had not found her love returned. And she could not stay. The pull of the sea was calling to her stronger and stronger. Her sisters called to her to return to them.
Slowly, she dropped her face back down to the tumult below and took a step forward.
“Don’t!”
The voice stopped her movements. The roll of thunder boomed again. Several tense moments passed before Alba heard the voice again.
“Please don’t.”
The voice was deep and soothing. But Alba could sense something else behind the words. Panic. Desperation.
Weakly, she turned to face the nameless voice, her head turning back to look across her shoulder. The rain was cascading in steady rivulets now. Mingling with the tears staining Alba’s face. Her dress had quickly become sodden and clung to her skin.
When her eyes came to the tree line, she saw him.
He was tall. Dark. His hair plastered to the sides of his face from the rain. Hands raised to indicate he was no threat to her.
Slowly, tentatively the man stepped forward to stand beside her before he spoke again.
Alba’s eyes tracked his movements.
When he was close enough to touch her, he spoke once more.
“Please. Do not succumb to it.”
When Alba did nothing but stare, the man continued, “To your grief. Please.”
It was the please that caught her. The gentleness and the kindness in his eyes as he pleaded with her.
His arms caught her as she collapsed atop the cliff, allowing the despair to wash over her.
The man held her while she cried, silent sobs that shook her to her core. Her fingers twisting and clinging to the folds of his shirt. His arms steady and firm around her shoulders as he cradled her. He held her until she stilled while the rains continued their lament. And when she was half asleep, ruined with exhaustion he carried her back down the path.
He settled her down underneath his own roof, beside a comfortable fire to dry her clothes and hair.
The man handed her a small bowl full of warm broth.
“Go ahead,” he coaxed, “you must get dry and eat. You do not want to catch cold. And then you should sleep.”
When Alba stared at him questioningly, he added, “You have nothing to fear from me. I am called Sihtric.”
~~~~~~~~~~~ To be continued in part II
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#cherrypie’s500#Hvitserk#vikings#sihtric#the last kingdom#deans ch ch cherrypie#Hvitserk x OC#sihtric x OC#vikings/the last kingdom crossover#hvitserk vikings#hvitserk x ofc#hvitserk ragnarsson#hvitserk lothbrok#fanfiction
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I realy hope I'm not late ok can you do
A reader that is a ocean goddess with a. Mermaid like look taking a likeing to jim and trying to flirt with him
California was known for its sunny beaches and clear skies. Some parts of Cali weren't as fortunate as Arcadia Oaks but Jim was glad that his neighborhood was typically sunny and the beach was only a 30 minute trip. So he could just get away for the day and go where the water was warm year around.
He was never known as the best surfer but being so close to the beach he'd picked some things up and after a long week he thought this spantenous trip to take some time to himself would be good. Just sun, sand, and no magic or trolls or girls. He could finally relax and get some things he'd been feeling off his chest.
Locking everything important in his vespa seat he smiles before taking off his shoes feeling the warm sand under his feet and inbetween his toes. Putting his towel down along with his umbrella and cooler he hides his keys under the blanket and his jacket before he runs towards the water with his old board. Laughing the entire way he yells at the sky once he makes it in the water, jumping up and down in joy. He watches the water splash all around and smiles as he spins taking in the sea and sand as he stands in the shallow waves.
He hadn't realized how hard it was to be be the Trollhunter until it was almost too much. Until unpleasant thoughts filled his head and his doubts nearly killed him. Laying on his board and paddling out to sea he's thankful the waves won't pumbel him as hard as Draal does during sparring or the Forge does during practice.
Paddling out he does a duck dive with his board as he aims for some of the bigger waves. Watching for the current and being careful he finally gets where he wants to be. Flipping himself over so he's ready to stand when the wave comes he waits. Letting the wave pick his board up he stands before sticking his hands out to keep balanced. Riding the wave and shifting his stance slightly to keep upright, he pauses as he sees something shiny in the water.
Crying out as he leans too far trying to see the shiny thing he falls into the water and tumbles with the waves.
Holding his board and moving his hair out of his face he hums. What was that?
~~~~~
A few hours later and Jims arms are sore but he's happy after a long day of surf and sand. He lays backwards on his board staring at the sky when a wave suddenly washes over him.
Crying out Jims thrown off his board and into the water. Reaching out for his board trying to get to the surface he feels the current tug him down as he begins sinking. Swiping for his board again he misses sinking further into the water. The Velcro on his ankle begins to loosen and he pinwheels against the current struggling to grab his board and ride a wave back to the saftey of the sand.
Hand grasping for wood he pauses as it grabs something else. Running out of breath and confused Jim gasps as he suddenly breeches the water and hits the beach. Coughing he blinks looking at the clouds before he takes deep breaths heaving in air. He'd been so far out, how had he gotten back to land? What had he grabbed or what had grabbed him?
That's when he notices a heavy pressure on his chest. Tilting his head he pauses seeing you. Whatever you were.
Jim stares at you and you look back blinking owlishy. Seeing he's heaving you force yourself backwards, propelling yourself off him so he can breathe. You land in the sand with a loud thump as you sit next to him.
"Ummm... hi?" He mumbles in a daze. You smile at him wiping hair out of his eyes.
"Your eyes are as blue as the ocean..." You mumble. He pauses as you reach out again and touch his face, his cheeks become red and you look panicked. "Are you okay? I'm sorry I don't know much about humans. I-" Scooting away from him he watches as a blue and green tail he hadn't noticed slowly fades to two human legs covered in a scale skirt.
"What are you?" He asks amazed. You smile and with some effort shift your legs so your sitting closer to Jim.
"... What do landers call it? A mermaid perhaps? A water dweller. A siren. Oh Merfolk! I'm a mer folk." They explain with a soft smile.
"What do they call you?" He questions swallowing as he stares at you amazed.
"A name... Your asking for My name?" Shifting the mer person stares at the sky thinking. Jim wonders what world they live in where they have to think of their name. Do they have one?
As they think Jim pauses as he observes them waiting for their answer. They wore a baggy sailors shirt and the skirt that was once their tail. Worn rope tied their skirt and shirt together and he could see little barnacles growing on the edges.
They were wild just like the sea.
They're hair was braided and curled, with seaweed and he noticed shells woven in like beads. Bracelets hung on their wrists and they jangled as the person moved. Looking closer he saw they were gold and silver bangles that hung with ancient coins, probabaly lost to the sea from sunken ships. A real mer folk. Jim was staring at a real mer folk.
"... My name is (Y/N)." They greet.
"I'm J-Jim. Jim Lake." He responds blushing. You giggle and he smiles listening to a sound similar to bells.
"Well Lake what are you doing in the ocean?" You ask with a teasing smile and he chuckles.
He had come to get away from magic but talking with you relaxing on the beach, maybe magic was exactly what he needed.
#jim lake#jim x reader#jim#toa jim#trollhunters jim#toa jim lake#trollhunters jim lake#toa james lake x reader#toa jim x reader#toa jim lake x reader#trollhunters jim lake x reader#trollhunters jim x reader#trollhunters james lake jr. x reader#toa x reader#trollhunters x reader#mermay#mer may#merfolk reader#i tried#funny enough my name in some langaues means sea so when i was editing this they said my name is the sea lol#well lake what are you doing in the sea is my favorite line ever lmao#jim lake x reader#james lake jr. x reader#toa#trollhunters
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Goddess Terezi’s Avatar Day
(Commission for @alt-hammer of an AU where Terezi is a dragon goddess in a fantasy-themed setting and Karkat is her destined lover, perpetually reincarnating to be by her side; on a special day, she takes on a form able to be in the mortal world and goes on to live with him, as a 8ft tall hyper curvy MILF of a dragon-troll lady!)
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The old temple took up a good portion of the mountainside, but it did not look like a built thing, but a grown thing; stone polished and plated with a process to create something like luminous gemstones made the elegant curves dominating its design mirror the teal forest growing right around it, all the way around the fertile lower slopes of the mountain down to the ground below, over the ancient pathways and roads that now led to ruins and strongholds.
It was old. The towns and villages, in a patchwork of alliances that were slowly building into a true nation, lay in the shadow of giants and echoes of power. The means to construct something like that had been long forgotten; the towering walls were hundreds of feet high, supporting spires that rose higher than that, and the means to create such wonders were long forgotten.
The temple glistened and shone, and it was easy to see it even through the trees. And through the forests, along the old road that was still visible beneath the undergrowth and tangling tree roots that made up so much of the forest floor, a stout troll walked.
His name was Karkat Vantas; today, in deference to the warm weather, he wore a thin cloak trimmed in fur from beasts he had likely taken down himself. His walk was awkward, staggering upwards, like a crab forcing itself to walk forwards.
The cloak was gray, but the trim was a bright red. The same red as his unique mutant blood, with nary a hint of the lime-green shades the rest of his family shared. And that color was significant.
(There was a tradition, among the people who lived in the shadow of the temple and remembered who it honored, and who worshipped the teal dragon goddess.
Rarely was a child born with blood as red as a human or the clattering, playing-piece people of ivory and jet. And such children, individually only arising a few hundred years or so, were bound to this task.
Upon reaching age, they were to travel to the temple alone, and commune with the goddess. From the moment they were born, the oracles spoke and the scriptures read, they belonged to the goddess. Blood, soul and heart.
And they came back, changed, and claimed.
Karkat had been no different.)
If someone watching him had been a flying creature, able to watch him through the trees, they might have seen him walk through the forest with confidence, to the stairway leading to the temple and where the forest shied away, as if in respect to the goddess it represented.
And then, to watch him walk up those steps as though he had every right to it. He walked with the assurance and automatic knowledge of someone who had lived there for years, though his visits had been infrequent.
(Karkat Vantas had dreams.
(In some, Karkat was a woman; other times, subscribed to no binary gender identity. In some, he was a priest to the dragon goddess, or a tinkerer, or an alchemist, or every job known to trollkind. There were lifetimes beyond measure, as many as there were stars in the sky. And in the dreams, a great ocean of memory rolled onwards, gently flowing into him.
(And so intimately familiar. As though he was not learning, but remembering something he had forgotten.
Something from a lifetime ago.
And the shape of something might change, over the ages, and remain what it was; a ship could have all its parts replaced but remain the same ship. And so it was with him. He had been there, in some way, for a long, long time, across so many lifetimes.
He would keep coming back, as many times as needed, to stay with her.
His goddess.)
The hypothetical viewer would have then seen Karkat approach the doors, over a hundred feet high and elaborately engraved with ancient murals, beautiful but their meaning lost to time. There were many figures there, dragons and blindfolded figures. At the center was a vast shape, broadly troll-shaped with the wings and tail of a great dragon, of impossibly curvaceous frame that spoke of an ancient culture’s idea of fertility and motherly awe. All the mural surrounded her, and over her heart was a small figure, its horns nubby and shaped like a crab’s claws.
No tool, magic (though truly powerful magic in these days was a rare thing) or skill of troll or any of the thinking people of the world had been able to pierce that doorway, or force it open. Not even the sharpest tool, strongest siege engine or mightiest spell could so much as mar its surface. But as Karkat approached, the door silently opened.
Not very much, it must be said. The great doorway mural split apart, dividing the image of the dragon goddess into two; in a nice bit of artistic inspiration, one half held a sword, blade pointed upwards to be employed against the unjust. And in the other, she carried a pair of scales, and they were heavy with many books and scrolls: these symbolized the laws she had bequarted to mortalkind, in antiquity. The gap was just large enough to allow him in; it seemed to him that a great wall had parted, just for him. He looked up, feeling faintly dizzy at how large it was. He couldn't even see the mural past a certain point, not from this angle. It just kept rising up, into the mountainside.
For a moment, it was dark, but at his approach (and his approach in particular), teal lights shone from within, invitingly. He walked inside, once more getting into the groove of things, and the door quietly closed behind him.
And there, the hypothetical viewer from above would see no more of him, or the insides of the temple. For it was a secret place, once home to mystery cults. Perhaps it still had a single such cult; a mystery cult of just one person, bound and dedicated to the goddess across many lifetimes, needing only age to remember that this was so.
Karkat saw, now, what an outsider never would, for this temple would open to him alone now.
The inside of the temple was, largely, an enormous and open space. Oh, it wasn’t plain; many doorways, some almost as big as the big doorway outside and others small enough for him, led to side chambers, ritual places to attend to other rites or personal preparations, or dwelling places for the priesthood and acolytes in ancient times. The vast space arced slightly up in a massive dome, maintaining structural integrity with secret methods of architecture, though perhaps the massive tree-like pillars (set to look as though they were growing, and carved of solid teal crystal) helped support the weight. There were many ancient treasures spilled across the ground in great piles, like a dragon’s hoard or a troll junk-pile, and Karkat walked past them, strolling past gleaming masses of precious metals and priceless relics (swords, books, statues, anything that might be of worth, all richly decorated to shameless excess), the contents of which could have allowed him to purchase entire cities and live like an emperor for the rest of his life, with complete indifference.
The biggest treasure pile was at the end of the hallway, so massive that the hills of golden coins and other gilded relics were as individually big as buildings, massing together into riches out of a miser’s most desperate dreams. It was massive beyond measure, large enough to build a city upon, and the whole of the chamber seemed to center around it, the architecture gently fanning out to emphasize it:
And upon that pile, dwarfing it, was the goddess herself, or at least an avatar of her. Either way, she was so big that she was a landscape unto herself, a beautiful mass of teal hillsides and rising plains, impossibly gigantic, and radiating so much power that it drew the mind directly to her.
Karkat stopped a few hundred steps from her, halting in mid-step with a slow ponderousness, perhaps stunned by the sight of her. As he always was, in fact; his red eyes widened, his grim expression softened into a genuine smile, and a hand went to his chest, over his heart, his claws toying with a little necklace he’d been given on their first meeting.
(“You made this, back when we first knew each other,” she had told him then, her voice booming and soft all at once, as she slid it from a claw tip onto his body. He’d looked at it then; the double shackles of his own sign, and the Omega sign of her worship, intertwined together.)
His claws ran along it. Not furtively, like he was embarrassed or scared. His fingers moved slow, with a calm that seemed quite atypical of him. All the more surprising, with the power and intensity rising from her.
Easily hundreds of feet tall, terrifyingly enormous even though she was laying down, the goddess shifted position. In the tangled mass of wings, arms and tail, a large hand appeared, scales glistening against the gray-green of her body, and it slid against the back of her head. Horns longer than a street tilted backwards as she raised her head.
Lips thick enough for him to lay upon or even slide into parted; a vast maw opened to the world, glowing faintly from within, and a massive yawn pealed out like the ringing of a bell. The goddess blinked once, though she had no need of sight, so perhaps it was just for the look of the thing, and she adjusted herself slightly. The treasure pile was compressed beneath her massive body, and as a huge belly slid forwards, and one gargantuan breast flopped sideways, displacing thousands of tons of gold; a flood of gold came raining down, stopping a short distance from Karkat.
He barely noticed, and just kept staring adoringly up at the massive teal wall that was her body.
Again, the goddess yawned, making a show of pretending she hadn’t noticed him there. But in truth, she had known he was there ever since he’d stepped foot into the forest; since he had woken up, she had felt him, even as she had sent the call. She cracked an eye open teasingly, and her eyes were red; not like his eyes, which were simply the color of his mutant blood. Her eyes were blinded by some unknowable injury in the ancient past, or her eyesight traded in a bargain for the wisdom that had led to giving mortals the first laws.
Now, she leaned forwards, her snout sniffing in his general direction. At that moment, she looked very much like a dragon, and she grinned widely. Her jaws were very broad, and it ought to have been frightening seeing all those teeth, some longer than he was tall, but he felt a sudden thrill of heat instead.
With a grunt, she sat upwards. Her shoulders, fairly broad by troll standards and relative to her gigantic size, looked narrow compared to how massive her lower body was, entire lakes of gold moved aside as a butt large enough to be two entire hills shifted upwards, her thighs digging into the gold to prop her up. They flexed, their enormous sides touching despite being fairly far apart, and she dug her knees into the ground to prop her up, and up she went: taller and taller she seemed to become, rising to her true height.
Scales glimmered across her entire body; they sparkled, glistening in shades of green and blue and true teal, so that she shone like the stars on a clear night. Those were dragon scales, overlapping together and smooth enough that it was easy to mistake them for skin, but for some large outcroppings of barbs and spikes running along her elbows and knees,
Now she was kneeling, and her backside loomed high and far out; an enormously plush backside, projecting out perhaps nearly as much as the whole of her arm, and as high as her waist, deep as her mid-thighs. Her gigantic butt moved faintly with only the most minor movements of her legs, and then another dragonish element of her body made itself plain: a thick tail lashed out, nearly as thick as Terezi’s entire body, neatly sliding over her immense buttocks and rising up behind her, and beyond her. It went on, and on, longer than she was tall, until finally it’s tapered tip flickered down, a wall of teal tail curling around Karkat’s body, as close to him as she could presently manage. Red spikes jutted out, mirroring the shape of her horns.
Her upper body arched upwards, with her tail to counter balance her. A massive pair of wings, sprouting from her back, flared out so that a shadow fell over Karkat and the whole of the inner temple. Leathery membranes shone like polished glass, wider across than she was tall, and they flapped once, twice: it helped her straighten up, and then Karkat saw her upper body loom up high, a landscape onto itself!
Her breasts moved; faintly, softly. They bounced briefly, though nothing so brief or whimsical as that word suggested. Their movement was a ponderous thing, like the movement of world-plates in motion, rising up and then down with grand importance and a sense of impact that nearly knocked him off his feet. Oh, they were big: they dipped down to her navel (or what would have been a navel, if trolls had been born live), the bottom slopes reaching out further still.
There, they arched somewhere around her waist, so that regardless of the direction your sight approached, there was amplitude to be spared: either breast or backside, she was enormous in every conceivable way. Outwards her divine breasts swung, just as voluminous as her backside, heavy with something like godly milk: ambrosia, perhaps.
A huge belly propped them up. Not merely the plump figure the murals outside suggested, her belly dipped heavily, projecting out even farther than her breasts did, wider even than her body except for her singularly massive hips, which were simply far too big to be easily equaled. It was clearly a pregnant belly, its shape a distinctive gravid shape, and from the way Karkat’s eyes glanced at the curving walls of its shape, he was clearly the father.
Now she posed, her arms stretching up above her, spikes clicking together, her claws sliding against each other, and she yawned once more, wings flaring out again. She arched her back to him in such a way as to show her massive bustline for best effect, her whole body jiggling and wobbling faintly.
He grooved faintly in place. She was so big, and so beautiful, the reality of her so wonderful and immense that it defied conscious comprehension. She slowly turned, her eyes blind, but she grinned impishly, the frill-like structures as the side of her head flapping against her short hair. The light caught her scales: deep teal across most of her body, darkening to a much darker green along her limbs, the bottoms of her breasts (like her own glittering bra), her body below the waist, and the outermost length of her tail, and the effect the light produced as it moved down the transition from one shade to the next was a mesmerizing sight, all against her magnificent frame, and the barely concealed pleasure at seeing him.
She was, technically, clothed. In another manner of speaking, she looked naked, but covered head to toe in elaborate golden decorations; thousands of pieces of spirals and interlocking meshes of metal webs encircled her breasts and belly, around her arms and a complexity of rings, all over her entire body. Even her face was covered, with a thin veil adorned in thousands of jewels, their sparkling facets catching the light like her scales did.
Now, she grinned at him. “‘About time you got here,” she said, her voice booming in the confined space, and purring too, all at once. Then, her hand moved out, incredibly fast, and her claws closed around all he could see, around him, and then he was being lifted up. He had a sensation of movement, rising high into the air, and then-
Wetness, warmth. A gentle sucking pressure around his entire body, and then a mental pressure that was much the same, her mind pressing against his own, filling him with the same love and affection she felt, propelling it through his entire body; it meshed with the sensation of her mouth engulfing his entire body, and he was helpless before it, euphoria and peaceful submission all blending together inside him.
It felt like bliss.
She ended the kiss, holding him in her hands still. Karkat, rather soaked but content with that, looked up.
He called her Terezi. Terezi Pyrope. The name had welled up, from an old memory, and that itself was odd; it was from a lifetime so long ago that he couldn’t even recall it properly. If it was long enough ago, his past lives grew harder to hold onto and examine, or to relive.
(“It's like straining leaves for tea,” he’d told her, once. It had been a dream, but that didn’t matter; when he slept, she stepped into his mind, shaping his dreams into a space for them to be together, in lieu of this day’s possibilities for more direct physical interaction. “The memories I can get, its water flowing through. But there’s a lot that just doesn’t filter through.”
She’d made a thoughtful noise at that. “Languages change. Cultures live and die,” she’d said quietly. “It’s still you, but past you is WAY different.”
“I think I hate past me.”
“Why.”
“Whoever they were, they’re a real pain in the ass to deal with.”
She’d laughed, then. “You know something? Past you said the exact same thing, about an even older you.”
“Shit, that’s another reason to be mad. They stole my bit!” She’d laughed at that; he had no idea why. He’d been completely serious, then.)
So, he didn’t understand the context, or the person he’d been then, or even what the words meant. Terezi wasn’t even the right word; it was the closest he could get to pronouncing it, but she didn’t seem to mind.
He minded, though. That was close to her secret name, her true name, and the true name of a goddess was no small matter, especially one as important and powerful as her.
Now, Terezi leaned close. The jewelry adoring her ear-fins jangled as her ears flopped, her eyes seemed to reflect him, and her breath was strangely cool as it came whistling out, like the wind from a cave filled with secrets and treasure. Some legends said her guts were the birthplace of thought itself…
“Hold that thought, I might show you in person later,” she cooed. It wasn’t a threat; she was fully capable of ‘escorting’ him inside her without harm, if she was so inclined.
They were married. It had been a private ceremony, but as she put it, not so much making a bond as resuming one; Karkat had always given the vibe of being truly spoken for, and until she’d revealed this to him, he’d understood why people got that impression.
Now, the world began to dip low. They were getting closer to the ground, Karkat realized. Terezi’s body shuddered, and she lowered herself, the ceiling above them not simply framing Terezi’s body or making a space for her to occupy, but moving away from them. The realization struck him:
Terezi was shrinking.
“What’s this?” He asked, crowding towards her palms for safety. The ground was getting closer, and the ceiling was getting further away.
Terezi chuckled. “Trying to fit in.” She smirked. “A hundred foot dragon-troll sticks out. I don’t think I like being as teeny-tiny as you, but I can manage being a little bit close to you, so long as you can still sleep on me.”
In moments, she had dwindled below fifty feet. Now they were getting even smaller than that; Karkat thought of something to say (“How are you doing this!?” “You could do this the whole time?!” and of course “OH GOD WHY IS THE GROUND COMING SO FAST LIKE THAT.”)
But by the time he could have thought to say any of that, they were almost to ground level.
Thirty feet; she was, and then twenty five feet. Twenty feet, and Karkat realized that the ‘surface’ below him, her palms and fingers, was gone; she held him still, gently adjusting herself so that he descended into her arms, his body snugly fitting there. She continued to shrink, and held him closer still, pressing him deep into her voluminous bustline and gravid belly, holding him very tightly, and at last, she reached the height she desired.
Karkat stayed in place, feeling her coolness, his arms instinctively wrapping around her shoulders and meeting behind her, and he was barely aware of the appealing softness of her body still engulfing him. Eventually, he cracked an eye open and saw the ground below him; further below than he was used to, but not so much as when he was with Terezi.
He blinked and looked into her eyes; to her face.
He blinked. She bent forwards and kissed him on the snout, and it was one way for him to realize that she was hugging him to her body, suspending him off the ground, and he was sunk deep into her cleavage.
He was beginning to have a full body blush. Which is a funny thing considering that he had been intimate enough with her to be fully pregnant, but some people are just naturally bashful.
“You like seeing me at fun size?” She said dryly, her lips pushing into a mock kissy face.
“You’ve been this size before!” He blurted out.
“Technically speaking,” she said. “Not in the physical sense.”
“What do you call the times we’ve been together, then?”
“A complex bit of magic involving mashing up the divine realms with the physical one so we could be together.” Terezi hugged him tighter, more sincerely. “Whereas this is me going to a lot of effort to make a body that can actually live among mortals.”
Karkat blinked. A shocking possibility came to him, in a rush of wild excitement. “You mean…?!”
“Yep.” Terezi gently put him down. She was, even shrunk down, incredibly huge, bigger than any troll or human could ever be, and when he reached the ground and looked up, the outward curve of her pregnant belly was over his head; if she walked forwards, his horns could have been used as a dock for her belly. “I’m gonna get to see how you explain to everyone you’ve been married to,” and she gestured to herself, “All THIS.”
“Eh, some of my friends know. Kind of. Sort of.”
“Oh, that’ll be a FUN conversation,” she cackled. She turned, her tail lashing around him, impishly smacking him on the butt; he peered up at her grumpily, and her butt seemed to fill his whole world, diminishing his annoyance instantly. He reflected that her frame was somehow even more imposing at this size; it was one thing when she was big enough to be a landscape, and was too big to really fit into his framework in some ways, but her being just large enough that doorways would prove to be a serious problem was more… grounded. It was easier to understand, and the size of her kept drawing his attention.
She still glittered, the revealing things she wore having changed size with her. “You brought the clothes I asked, right?” she asked, grabbing one of the spiraling ornaments that ‘clothed’ her left breast, gently yanking it off. He turned around in a hurry.
“Yeah. Oh, oh. That’s why you wanted the clothes; to change into them.”
“Yeah, what did you THINK I wanted them for?”
“Honestly I don’t even ask questions anymore; I figured you just liked collecting random stuff.”
Terezi held up a finger to make a dramatic counterpoint. She paused. She thought it over. “Screw it, that does sound cool. Objection withdrawn.”
He grabbed a bag he had brought, and his eyes averted, dropped it in front of her. She took it and, removing the garb that represented sacrifices made to her, changed into the clothing.
------
Dave Strider yawned, half-sitting in a large bin filled with soft, square objects that were pretty generic looking, the results of his mother’s experiments with magic; conjuring up physical objects was a tricky matter, but at least these were soft and made for good bedding, or something to sit on.
He lay in front of an entrance to the town, wearing the uniform of the guard and a short, single-edged blade presently sheathed. He didn’t give off the look of a stern guard, and instead gave the impression of a discarded puppet, his legs hanging slackly out of the bin. He didn’t mind; if it was an opportunity to take a nap, he’d take it.
Dave’s eyes flickered, behind a mirrored visor. It was earlier than he expected, he thought, noticing the sun’s position. He followed its position to the forest, which the town had expanded out of, clearing out bits at a time as it slowly had grown over the years. In the distance, he saw the mountain, and the temple upon it.
Vaguely, he wondered when Karkat would be back.
His thoughts drifted from a friend to his fiance, Jade, and his calm expression flickered into a more genuine smile as he thought of her. Getting off work couldn’t come soon enough.
He lay back into the pile of moderately generic objects, and stayed there for a while. This part of the world was wild; few cities and towns were left, those that remained supplying their own agriculture and making everything on hand. The occasional call to adventure was the main of distant treasures and weapons, or the precious scrap of knowledge that came now and then; Dave had done it in his youth, until he’d proposed to Jade, and knew something about it, and that their town had abit of fame as the last place where the dragon goddess was actively worshiped.
Something to be proud of, he supposed.
He noticed some motion approaching their way, and soon they were two figures, coming out from the forest, from the general direction of the temple. Pilgrims, perhaps? He didn’t see the point, since the temple was sealed off to everyone…
They came closer, and soon he recognized one of them as Karkat, looking more cheerful than he’d ever seen him. It was a little unsettling, actually. Any greeting was far from his mind, because there was the other person walking with him. Dave’s mouth dropped as they approached, and he quickly closed it, trying to regain his composure.
There was a lot of wobbling involved. And… jiggling… and massive hips, barely confined by a sporty robe, swaying heavily from side to side with the kind of heavy force that you got when something was so big that just moving one way or another was like shoving your way around.
Dave’s mouth stayed open. The brain processes stopped. Big, he thought numbly. Jiggly… bouncy… oh WOW she is big…
This thought remained stubbornly present as the pair came close. Karkat stopped, with an aura of fierce pride. Beside him was a troll woman, the most outrageously curvy person Dave had ever met, and with the likes of Jade, that was some stiff competition; she was at least ten feet tall, so big that his head was forced to tilt up to meet her eyes, and there wasn’t much point. Her breasts jutted out with an intimidating heft, so far out that he could barely see her face at all.
She grinned, standing proudly, her hips almost four feet across and aggressively tilted as if to show off how massive they were. Her robes were short, cut at the knee and short pants beneath them, for maximum range of movement. She had a few other requirements, too; a massive pair of wings flapped behind her, apparently big enough to lift her off the ground, and a large tail moved behind her, its length moving around Karkat and its tip sliding into his hand for him to squeeze. Given that she was roughly twice his size, it was a convenient way for them to come close to holding hands.
Mutations like this weren’t unknown, especially in places of high magic. Still, these dragon-like traits, and such enormous size, were distinctive, and so where the glittering scales over her teal body. She stood out brilliantly against the dull red of Karkat’s visible body. Dave was strikingly reminded of the way Jade’s preference for greens contrasted against the reds he liked to wear, and perhaps also because his buxom fiance’s figure was perhaps a less extreme version of this giant woman.
The troll woman grinned, showing sharp teeth beneath thick black lips. “‘Sup,” she said. Her belly hung out, so big and heavy that she had to have been pregnant. Perhaps a few months along, from the size.
“Uh, hi.” Dave glanced at Karkat, finding some of his normal cool. “She, uh, a friend of yours? From out of town or something?” Granted, that was unusual, but maybe someone so big had the strength to just bowl over anything threatening her.
“You could say that, yes,” Karkat said.
“I’m kind of famous, actually,” the troll woman said, grinning even wider. The way she grinned was a little worrying; she half looked like she was trying to unhinge her jaws to swallow him whole, if it seemed pressing. Dave gulped. “You might not be able to place me, though.”
“Really,” he said, unable to think of anything else to say. He shook his head and tried to focus. Okay, she was big… she was fucking humongous, actually, but he knew big girls. He knew super busty girls. Okay. He was going to be mature and think smart, now. “What’s your name?”
“Terezi Pyrope.”
“Hrm. I know some Pyropes in town. You a relative?”
“I might be,” she said, with a vaguely evasive air that suggested there was a lot more to it than what she was saying. He filed that under ‘kinda suspicious’.
“Hrm.” He gave Karkat a sidelong look, as if to say ‘where’d you find THIS big lady?’. He shrugged. “Well, hope your journey down here went okay. The way here’s pretty dangerous. Karkat run into you and guide you to town or something?”
A faint suspicion struck him. His gaze drifted to Karkat’s hand, on that thick tail, squeezing so warmly, so familiarly. That did… not look platonic. Or like something with someone you’d just met.
“We, uh.” Karkat glanced at her, and said the most extreme understatement in the history of their entire world: “We kinda already know each other?”
Dave tilted his head. “Oh?”
“You know how I told you that I was, in fact, married to someone that you’d never met and couldn’t come to town for important reasons I wasn’t allowed to talk about?”
Dave snorted as Terezi raised an eyebrow. “Man, are you STILL doing that old joke? It stopped being funny years ago.”
“It’s not a joke!” Karkat snapped, bristling so much even his hair stood on end like quills.
Terezi glanced at Karkat and quietly said, “Really, you couldn’t have made it sound less like you making something up?”
“It’s not my fault they hear the literal truth and won’t take it at face value.”
Dave shrugged. “So what are you guys getting at-” He paused. “Oh. Ohhh. No way, NO WAY.”
“Karkat was telling the truth,” Terezi said.
Karkat radiated smugness.
“You two are married,” Dave said, disbelief in every word.
Karkat’s eyes narrowed. “...Why’s that so hard to believe?”
Dave was famously unflappable, even stern when he was affecting his Big Time Hero persona. He prided himself on keeping his cool. He’d faced down the legendary Rapmaster Hydra, spitting rhymes and spitting poison almost as toxic as those rhymes; he’d played a pool of dice with gangster sirens in the reality-traveling Casino of the Damned and didn’t blink when they tried to make him wager his soul; he’d even spent about five minutes in the dreaded Crypt of Terrors. The less said about that, the better.
Through all of it, he’d never so much as blinked.
Now he was genuinely lost for words.
Terezi saw a moment, and grinned while her tail curled Karkat closer to a massive thigh. The impact made her leg jiggle as he sank slightly into her with a goofy grin, and she clapped a hand against her gravid belly. “And we’re expecting, too~!”
Dave stared, desperately trying to process all this. Karkat’s married. Karkat has a girlfriend that’s a smoking hot giantess. Karkat’s MARRIED to her. She’s pregnant. Karkat married a super curvy mutant girl. Okay wow her thighs are bigger than ME, kind of called Kark’s tastes right there.
Karkat is MARRIED. And they’re expecting kids, already?
When the hell did all that happen?
“Wow,” He said eventually. “You work fast.”
Terezi laughed and Karkat scowled again.
“Try and act cool in front of her, I beg you,” Karkat hissed.
Terezi reached forward, her massive breasts swinging forward and nearly smacking right into Dave’s face. The sight of bountiful cleavage about to swallow him was a familiar one, but not scaled and blue-green, and then her knuckles found the top of his head, pushing aside his helmet, and rubbed friendly noogies onto him. “I like this guy!” Terezi said cheerfully, giving him a parting bonk on the noggin for good measure.
She heard a thump and a muddy splatter. She sniffed downwards, and sensed that he had fallen down into the mud; her breast had smacked right into him, so hard he’d been propelled right off his seat.
“Sorry?” She said, surprised to feel embarrassed. She never had to deal with THAT in the ethereal planes…
-------
About an hour later, the sun was getting slightly higher into the sky and in the market, there was a decent crowd milling around, traders and customers and both at the same time, mixing together with a potent smell. Their calls to passerbys, verbal advertisements, occasional arguments or loud haggling, it all mixed together into a loud noise, as good as a crying caw-bird to remind you that noon was nearly there.
Jade Harley’s ears, more canine than human, flickered at the noise; she ambled from the storeroom, her broad hips so wide that she had to walk very carefully through the door frame. “‘Scuze me!” She said reflexively to the doorway, even though it was inanimate, moving in the careful way she’d learned to move through a doorway with hips like hers.
She carried a box; it clattered with flasks, tubes, glasses and other containers of different sizes (some only a few ounces, others in the gallons). It was hard to make it out; Jade quite liked to experiment on herself, as indicated by the dog-like ears poking through her thick black hair and the long tail wagging behind her, and some subtle adjustments to her body, but her potions had also given her a bustline so massive that it completely covered the potions. She walked forwards and her breasts preceded her by several feet, slung out nearly to her waist, bouncing and jiggling as her powerful thighs smacked against her endowments.
It all felt very nice; her tail wagged harder, her mouth set in a faint smile, and she came to a work desk in her shop, laden with all the instruments of the alchemists art: complicated machines of glasswork, distillers, purification burners, solvents assembled by intensity, and a small pedestal for the infusion of magic and special ingredients. She put down the box of containers, instinctively taking care to avoid smashing anything with her massive breasts (it wouldn’t be the first time!) and poured some liquids at the ready into the set, readying today’s first potion. One was already ready to be tested, and Jade studied it carefully. After some thought, she poured it into a tube and stuffed that into a pouch at her side. She’d have to test that one herself later!
Eventually, she heard Dave’s voice. Her tail wagged extra hard! She swung out, passing by her assistant (a living construct named Sawtooth, one of Dirk Strider’s artificial sons and she suspected was working for his brother’s fiance to judge her for himself), and making sure not to smash anything over, came into the waiting room.
Dave was there; Karkat too, and what she initially mistook for several other people. She focused on Dave first, and he barely had time to acknowledge her presence before she swept him up into her arms, hugging the shorter man into her mountainous cleavage so deeply that his upper body vanished from sight. “Hi, Dave!” She said cheerfully.
“Hey, Jade,” He said, remaining outwardly calm, only a swooning tension in his face betraying the intense feelings within. He leaned up from her boobs and kissed the side of her face; she giggled and kissed him back, her tail wagging even harder.
She kissed him a few more times, in the manner of love grown mature and comfortable, though rather giggly. It felt familiar to the other pair present there, as yet unnoticed by Jade. She corrected that partly, then, letting Dave slide out from her bustline, and turning her attention to Karkat with a winning smile.
He studiously kept his gaze to her eyes. She smirked. “We don’t usually see you about at this time,” she said playfully, clapping him on the shoulder. “How’s it been?”
“Good enough,” Karkat said guardedly. “I, uh, have someone for you to meet-”
Dave said, “Babe, Karkat got married and never even told us.”
Jade’s eyes widened. “He WHAT!?”
“I told you all the time and you wouldn’t believe me!” Karkat snapped.
Beside Karkat, there was a giggle, rumbling and… dragon-like. Now Jade turned up and, it must be said that she was very tall (enough to tower over most people, even trolls) and so busty that they were almost their own body mass. But then and there, suddenly she felt small.
Which was rather funny, all things considered. She was actually more buxom than the giantess currently filling available space from a good portion of the wall all the way to the ceiling; more buxom in terms of proportion. Whereas Jade was now looking at a legs broader than her, a belly curving outwards above her and big enough for her to lay on, and yes, breasts that she could have fit between with ease, massive potion-enhanced bustline and all… and hardly a sight of the face at all.
The massive troll, glittered with scales and her great wings flapping (and Jade goggled at those features; how intriguing! How cool! She burned with questions; had she been born like that, did she do it to herself on purpose?), leaned over. Her cleavage descended, and Jade found it hard to resist the impulse to admire the view. Now, though, she saw the troll woman’s face; pretty and impish at the same time, though it was objectively the kind of face that got put on grand statues. Some sense of mischief pervaded it anyway. Then Jade saw her eyes; red, and blind.
The troll woman grinned, so widely Jade automatically smiled right back. “Karkat says the best translation for my name is Terezi. So you must be the super-smart alchemist he’s always talking about!”
Jade slowly turned towards Karkat. “Oh? Talking about me, huh? Hope you’re saying good things!”
“Things like you’re the smartest person there ever was and if he ever had to take transformation potions or empowerment tonics, you're the ONLY person he trusts with his body like that.”
Jade grinned, her teeth wolfish and long. It was surprisingly a match for Terezi’s huge fangs. “Ohh, I like her already!” She looked her up and down, still smiling, and brimming with curiosity. “So. You’re married, huh?” She pouted. “And I wasn’t invited?”
“We had to make special preparations for her to come visit like this; it was hard for her to come at all,” he said hurriedly. “Not exactly a traditional ceremony; we didn’t have a regular wedding, you know?”
“Hmm. Well, you get off on that one.” Jade turned around, wiggling her very big and plush butt as she walked towards the door, tail moving thoughtfully. “Sawtooth!”
The tall and thin construct made a buzzing noise in acknowledgement.
“Think you can deal with the shop for today? This is a special occasion! I think it calls for showing Karkat’s love around town!”
He nodded in confirmation. Terezi grinned and said, “Sweet!”
-----
The group of four left not long afterwards, and went to wind their way through the market, though this wasn’t without its own complications.
Karkat had grown up with Jade and Dave, and both of them were used to the problems Jade had developed when it came to confined spaces conflicting with her girthy breasts. Her spatial awareness was not exactly the best, and knocking over carts, stalls, unattended packages or bouncing especially unwary shoppers into the street was a frequent occurrence. It had its own rhythm; a bright impact noise, then something falling away or bouncing away from her bustline (wood splintering when stalls got pushed down and smashed; people falling down into the muddy streets, clattering sounds of glass or other containers going everywhere, the squawking or snorting of miniature livestock dropping) and outraged cries swiftly dying away at the reality of Jade’s breasts came to dominate their whole world, and finally Jade’s frantic apologizing and halting to help them up.
It had been a routine, for a while.
Now, the markets, living so close to her, had learned to work around her. The stalls were further apart than was custo, to allow for the passage of women that were unusually buxom or curvaceous enough for it to be a problem. People had learned to walk not clustered together or keep their things at a level where a hyper-sized breasts might knock it down, and there was a wide lane clear for Jade to walk through.
As they passed through, though, for Terezi to see the town for herself, it became clear that these measures were… Karkat sought for a word. He settled on insufficient.
Terezi trailed behind Jade and Dave, her tail and wings lifted high to show her butt off better. This was probably to show off a little to the dumbstruck townsfolk, with the sound of things crashing or breaking in her wake as people dropped what they were holding or fumbled in their shock at her, but it was probably for Karkat’s benefit as well. She’d insisted on him walking a little behind her (“So you don’t get knocked around by us big girls being all big,” she’d said, while Jade had giggled at ‘us big girls’), and most of what he could see was just Terezi, and mostly her huge butt at that.
Her walk was a massive stride that should have made the whole street shake. An enormous thigh, wider than two of any troll you might name, flexed her butt heavily, so much that it had a ponderous weight as it bounced back the other way when she walked.
Her enormous belly, stuffed with her developing offspring-to-be, jutted outwards, and gurgling faintly, so big that it's teal surface shoved its way through crowds that moved around Dave and even Jade, but didn’t process Terezi fast enough before she kept coming, and gently bowled them over. Her tail would then dip down, lift them back up and drop them to their feet, before going the other way and doing it again with perhaps four people at once, all in a smooth swishing motion.
Their procession moved by one side of the street, and Karkat couldn’t actually see her boobs moving, but he felt the impact of their bounces, not confined particularly well by her robes. He felt bad that he couldn’t find something that fitted better, or displayed less cleavage, but getting tailors to go along with it had been enough of a challenge before her boobs had ripped a plunging neckline into it. He wondered what the view was like for the traders that saw her coming.
He reflected, watching edges of her bustline wobble from behind her (such was their size , of course), that it would probably like watching the world’s most beautiful statue, made in the grand size of old sculptures and colossi meant to inspire, come to life and start advancing on you. A wall walking at you might have a similar effect, but not as inspiring.
Dave walked around others; Jade simply moved forwards, people getting out of the range of her destructive and wobbly bustline but not quite as lucky with Terezi’s belly. Even though she picked them up afterwards without breaking stride, they still looked terribly dazed, and Karkat wondered how heavy that big, maternal belly actually was. They were lucky they weren’t big enough to be in danger of her breast hitting them, he thought.
Terezi stopped, halting that line of observation, and turned aside. Her tail swished, and someone who was too close to her got hip-checked and dropped clear to the ground. Jade and Dave had the same fate, and the wobbling globes of Terezi’s backside innocently swung right into them, knocking them both over. Terezi leaned down, possibly unaware of this. Dave hit the ground backfirst, while Jade fell down upon him, her breasts smothering him completely, to a chorus of their respective cries.
“Oh, hey, this smells fancy,” Terezi said, inspecting a bit of red jewelry, sniffing at the air; she ‘saw’ not through sight, but through a more transcendent awareness of the idea of things, but she persisted in framing it as scent-based perception.
The tradestroll, a mesmerized bronzeblood clearly hoping this would end without him getting smashed about, swallowed. Terezi was bent over enough that her breasts had dipped down, her eyes still on roughly the same level as the tradestroll’s head. Her butt stuck out far and high into the air and even thicker than her thighs, tail arching up like an arc, and her breasts nearly hit the ground now.
The outer swells of Terezi’s breasts pressed against the cart, threatening to turn it over. Her cleavage was big enough, and deep enough, for a troll to slide between. It was very much an intimidating sight, and the tradestroll wavered as Terezi asked about the history of that particular piece. “Ah, well-” she started to say, and went into an explanation of it.
Jade, with some effort and help from Karkat, eventually got up. “Oh, don’t be bashful,” She muttered to Dave. “Not like it's the first time this has happened to you!”
“Gonna have to follow my heart,” Dave said, his expression completely neutral and face totally red. “Gotta follow my muse. If I’m gonna be mortified about my fiance boob-smashing me, well that’s the way it’s gotta be.”
She gave him a friendly punch to the shoulder. “You’re such a dork!”
“Yep. You got a type.”
“Yeah, that’s fair.”
Terezi left the tradestroll, who’d told her a fair bit about the town’s history. Probably not intentionally; for a short conversation, Terezi’s divine domain allowed her to pick up on associations and the ramifications of decisions, so by simply being told minor things, she would then know what led to those things happening. It gave her more of a sense of how the town had changed since she’d last incarnated.
That was a constant in her life, she supposed sadly. Karkat came back to her, and the world she had helped make constantly. Now it was changing without her.
Her belly rumbled, interrupting that kind of thinking. Jade gave her an appraising look. “You guys hungry?”
Terezi had her own particular dietary needs, and shrugged. “Mm, maybe later, when you finish showing me around.”
“Nonsense, we can pick up something quick!” Jade snapped her fingers. “Ooh, I have an idea. We have a friend on the way from a scenic route. Come this way, please!” She led the way, Dave nonchalantly following her.
Terezi shrugged, and followed them, Karkat in tow.
They progressed out of the market, by a number of homes, wherein Terezi saw other friends and families of Karkat’s circle of friends:
She saw Jade’s half-brother, John, playing with his older cousins Jude and Joey, as their mother (a towering and imposing fuchsia troll) was baking a cake, the smell of which was incredible. And Terezi normally didn’t even like sweets. A small black chess-person, apparently the mayor of the town, was having some kind of very one-sided argument with her before goggling very openly and kind of rudely at her, and Karkat and Dave were quite cross with him for it. He didn’t seem to be bothered.
Dave’s brother Dirk, a very serious man who was apparently in the process of making himself into some kind of clockwork machine-man, waved amiably to them as he did some blacksmithing work on a bar of hot metal, smashing it into shape. For some reason, he insisted on wearing an incredibly ugly hat to set the mood. (“It’s gonna be a shitty piece, so I gotta set the mood,” he said. Terezi was impressed on how he didn’t seem to react at all to her unique look. Maybe Jade’s example had desensitized him.)
They met others, as they wandered through the town, attracting fascinated stares and glances, and more than a little envy at her outrageous frame. More than a few people asked to touch her belly, and she allowed them to do it with a smug grin, relishing the awe radiating from them as they felt her huge belly, and the pressure of the life growing inside her.
Karkat was going to be a father. For some reason, this really shocked a lot of people.
“You moved fast,” Jade said, and it sounded like a joke, but it was strangely thoughtful as they walked up a hill.
Karkat frowned. “I told you guys, we’ve been meeting for years. This isn’t new.”
“Yeah, but. You’re married. You’re gonna be a dad.” Jade’s tone grew softer. “Before me and Dave, even.”
“It’s a lot to take in, is that right?” Terezi asked.
Jade nodded glumly at her. “Yeah. Exactly.”
Soon, they came to a high point within the town, walking up a hillside, where the remnants of the old forest had been entirely cleared away.
Their path was a narrow space between the pens of oink-beasts, and Terezi normally got hungry around livestock, but she was forbidden from consuming the meat of creatures like them specifically, and so she ignored them pulling away from her. She focused instead of trying to move her body through the space between the pens, her big butt and boobs and gut all pinched by the space. Jade was having just as much trouble, wiggling her hips to slide through and her breasts pushed together by the pen’s sides.
Finally, though, they made it free of that impediment and came to the top of the hill.
And there, the town spread out beneath them, towards the horizon. Disorganized neighborhoods, making homes and small businesses apparently at random, with smaller pockets of completely abandoned buildings waiting for someone to take up residence. The offices of the mayor, sawmills and foundries quietly powering away, an ancient library that had been there before the first inhabitants had arrived.
Further away, the buildings thinned out, until there were only open meadows, at the very edge of where the town ended. And past that point, up rose the forest again, encircling the whole town, an alien but somehow friendly presence.
From here, they showed Terezi the lay of the land, and pointed out parts of town to her, so that she built up a rough idea of how it was laid out, and she followed the trail of thoughts and history they didn’t realize pooled in what they said.
They also pointed out what would be her home; it was Karkat’s home, in fact. It sat just outside of town, squatting with a grouchiness apparently passed on from its owner, the teal and red colors still bright. He’d inherited the place when he’d come of age, Dave had said, apparently that every so often a troll was born with his blood color and was sent to live there. They didn’t actually know why, it was just part of an ancient tradition.
Terezi smiled. She couldn’t actually see it, but she perceived it anyway.
Jade smiled up at her. “Come on,” she said. “A friend of ours doesn’t live far from here.”
------
The smell of baking bread was a familiar scent to Jane Peixes, and she’d grown used to it, and still liked it.
She was a thick and broad woman, powerfully built, and she displayed it thoroughly as she pulled loaves of bread out of the oven; her broad arms heavy with muscle, nearly as tall as an ordinary man even bent nearly double over. She was built on lines surprisingly similar to Terezi, in fact; her hips were so big that doorways could be a serious problem, and her hefty gut pressed hard against her apron. Her breasts, though supported by her clothing, still swept out nearly to her knees now, and when she stood up, carrying the loaves with her, she had to hold the pan quite a way out to prevent burns to her chest: her breasts projected out by more than a foot, the lower slopes meet the top of her belly, and it necessitated some careful movement in her line of work.
Jane moved away from the oven, not so much walking or strutting (though she certainly had the hips for it, her butt pressing against her pants with the kind of heavy weight that forces pants to mold to their shape), as apologetically shuffling from place to place. Jane was big, Jane was strong, and Jane was a child of the Peixes matriarch who’d married into the Egbert after a wild marriage with the Harley elder, and thus had a lot to live up to. The pressure had really gotten to her, and she spent most of her life involuntarily cringing back from the world, afraid of taking too much space.
When it came to cooking (and surprisingly enough, economic acumen), though, she really blossomed. She placed the fresh loaves to cool, and felt a surge of satisfied pride at them. As she did, she heard a familiar and much loved voice call out, “Jane! I have someone to introduce to you!”
Jane smiled. “Jade! Just a moment!” She removed her oven gloves and hurried out.
Jade was waiting for her just outside her shop, and Jane faltered as she saw her; well, not just her, or Dave, or Karkat (so unusual to see him around, lately!), but the massive dragon-like troll woman, waving to her.
“Hey,” the teal troll said.
Jane smiled nervously. “Ah, hello, miss! I don’t believe we’ve met?”
She introduced herself as Terezi, and gave Karkat a significant look. Her eyes, Jane realized, were blinded. “Are you okay?!” Jane asked.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” she said quickly. “Don’t you worry about it, I can handle myself fine.”
“Oh. I’m sorry.” Jane’s hands wriggled. “Um… you’re a friend of Jade’s?”
“We just met!” Jade said. “She’s a… ‘friend’ of Kakrat’s, apparently.”
“We’re married,” Karkat said flatly.
Jane blinked. She looked from the grouchy troll she knew, to the towering, incredibly beautiful, and intimidating giantess in the room.
She was grinning like a drawerful of swords.
“I thought you had a type,” she said meekly. “How come I never heard you got married?”
“It was hush-hush, apparently,” Dave said. “Karkat got MEAN, you know. He didn’t invite me, his best bro, to his wedding. What a FIEND.”
“Hey…” Karkat said warningly.
“Or me!” Jade teased, putting an arm around Karkat’s shoulder and mashing him into a massive breast, to his obvious annoyance and embarrassment. “His best bro-ette! He’s so mean!”
“Dastardly,” Jane agreed.
“Hey!” Karkat said.
“An absolute cad,” Dave said, shaking his head.
“We’ll have to cast him out to keep our honor as a township,” Jade said sadly. “It’s the only reasonable thing.”
“I can’t believe you married me with such a stain on your soul,” Terezi said, grinning.
“Oh GODDAMMIT YOU’RE AS BAD AS THEM,” Karkat groused.
Jane giggled. Jade did too, and released Karkat.
The joke passed, and Jade leaned forwards. Or at least shoved her boobs onto a table to steady herself. “I think we’re all kind of hungry. Think you could help us out?”
“Sure,” Jane said, smiling timidly. “I have some loaves that just finished up. That’ll make a fine breakfast.”
“Sure, just a moment.” Jade reached for her purse, and Jane’s eyes widened, and she rushed forwards.
“No, no, I couldn’t!” She said. “Go on, this is on the house! Please!” She disappeared into the bakery.
“Hang on a minute, you can’t-” Jade gave up. “Oh, not again… this is terrible for her profit margin.”
“She does this a lot?” Terezi asked.
“When it’s us? Yeah. Jane’s sweet and she’s kind of a pushover… she’s always giving us stuff, but it's not like the dough is super easy to come by…”
Terezi felt a little bad, honestly.
Jane came back, with several loaves of bread. “On the house!”
Terezi took them. “Aw, but I can’t-”
Jane put a finger to her plump lips. “Shush! You take them!”
Terezi looked at the loaves. One of them had a smiley face on it. Now she felt incredibly bad. “I don’t know…”
“Shush, you! Eat up!” Jane brought up a table, big enough even for Terezi (provided she moved the chair away and just sat down).
All four of them assembled at the table, and took a seat. Jade with her breasts overflowing, Dave next to her, and Karkat sitting on the floor next to Terezi in a show of silent solidarity. She tried to persuade him otherwise, but he persisted; she compromised, just picking him up and plopping him into her lap, and with his back against her belly and growing family, and her breasts over his head, he accepted that.
Terezi swallowed a loave whole, her jaws widening for it as she slid the bread down her throat, its surface pushing against her skin. Jane watched, in scandalized fascination. The others began to eat, and told stories about what they’d been up to; apparently they hadn’t caught up in a while.
“So the guard thing is going pretty okay,” Dave said. “It’s regular work. It’s not FUN, or exciting, but a guy’s gotta do regular stuff, you know?”
Jane nodded at that. “Yeah; I wanted to make artisanal cakes, but there’s not exactly a lot of people wanting to buy those.”
“I would,” Terezi said, devouring another loaf.
Jane smiled. “I thought there was something I liked about you.”
Jade in turn, chewing through her bread and indifferent to the avalanche of crumbs sliding into her cleavage to be lost forevermore (or until the next shower), said “I think we’re probably gonna do a small ceremony, when WE get married. Nothing big or fancy. What’d you do, Karkat?”
From below the table, Karkat’s voice sounded. “Yeah, we went for the small and private thing, as you guys won’t STOP going on about.”
“Next time, make your life sound a little more believable,” Dave said. “Next you’ll be telling us she ascended from the heavens.”
“Yeah, that’d be SUPER weird,” Terezi said, with a teasing grin. “But then, I WAS inside the old temple, you know. Wouldn’t be too far fetched.”
Dave snorted. “Pfft. No way.”
“Temple?” Jane repeated. “Oh, that place Karkat is always traveling to! How’d you get inside that temple?!”
Jade chimed in, “I always thought it was sealed shut!”
Terezi thought very carefully for a moment. But she’d gone through this, many times, and she knew what to say to content them without telling them the quite unbelievable truth. “I guess there’s some kind of magic in me the temple responds to; supposedly, from what I’ve heard, I’m descended from the people that once worshiped there.”
Jade tilted her head. “That makes sense; don’t suppose you could show us in, sometime?”
“Sure,” Terezi said brightly, wondering vaguely if they were ready to see her in her true glory. Ah well. She’d get to that when she needed to.
They ate together, a while longer; sharing interesting stuff that had happened to them lately, or providing her with fun details about their lives. An hour or two, free to be spent like this, dawned. Terezi was still hungry, even after eating her fill; bread was not exactly what a dragon needed.
The opportunity came not long after Jade, a mischievous look in her green eyes (Glowing faintly, a consequence of magical empowerment experiments) tugged out a potion from her satchel. “Hey, guys, check this out.” She wiggled it before them, for everyone to see. “Know what this here is?”
Terezi tilted her head. “It smells good.”
“Oh, it does taste nice, but that’s not the whole thing~!”
Dave gave it a look. “Hey, isn’t that the potion that you used to…” he fumbled in front of him, in such a way as to indicate inflation from the chest.
“Oh my,” Jane said, realizing what it was. “Your… embiggening potion.”
Karkat raised an eyebrow. “Working on improving the formula?”
“Yep!” Jade said proudly. “I get a lot of requests for my kind of… uh.” She indicated her chest with an impish shrug. “‘Enhancement’. So I’ve been trying to make the potions more dependable. They’re kind of all over the place in how much you get out of them; I got this big from a single drop, but other people that volunteered only go up a few cup sizes, if that!”
“Okay that does sound like a problem,” Terezi said, swallowing another mouthful. She gesticulated vaguely, talking with her gestures. “Like… if you wanna market that, or give them out, you’d want something consistent, right?”
“Yeah! But so far, it’s completely dependent on the magic already inside people… how powerful they are, for example,” Jade said. She noticed Terezi’s interest in the potion suddenly spiking, but didn’t realize why. (Namely, Terezi being a living goddess, she was intrigued by what such a potion would do to her, with all the power she held.) “I’m hoping to find something that is a bit more controlled.”
“So, is that one dependable yet?” Terezi asked. Jane nodded hurriedly, looking longing for it. She glanced at herself, Terezi and then Jade, all with genuine longing. Perhaps it was envy, or attraction. Possibly both.
“I dunno!” Jade said, breaking the seal on it.
“Wait a second,” Dave said. “You don’t know what it’ll do!”
“And this is how I find out!” Jade said, a sudden desire to impress Karkat’s super cool wife overwhelming her, and she tipped the bottle’s contents down her mouth.
Her throat glowed green as the potion went down, and then so did her belly. Soon, the glow faded.
They waited.
Jade looked down. She frowned.
She patted her stomach thoughtfully, looking worried.
She started to say, “Something usually should happen by now-”
And Jade stopped, her voice tangling up into a startled squeak, her back arching up and her breasts glowing bright green. They wobbled while remaining completely still, wildly shifting in place and shaking, slowly swelling outwards. They did so silently, flesh not normally making much of a sound, but the same could not be said of her clothing.
The fabric began to tear. She required special clothing, and it was already stressed by the demands of her body, the local tailors not quite up to speed with making things for such extreme bodies; they didn’t know how to make support for breasts that weighed more than oink-beast livestock, or tailor fitting clothing that worked around them. The plunging necklines Jade liked was a necessity as much as a deliberate fashion trend.
They reached a limit; her breasts grew bigger, fluxing outwards by the span of a finger in every direction: outwards, below, forwards, the teardrop shape growing more extreme as the base of her breasts didn’t expand any, so it looked like they were swelling from a relatively small connection point; the contrast made them look even more ludicrously big.
At the sides, her top tore, the stitches popping loo and flapping open as her breasts swelled another handspan out with a wobbling surge of growth. Her top had to be stitched special, following the diameter of her breasts, and these popped multiple stitches, threatening to have Jade experience a very embarrassing wardrobe failure. Now her breasts piled up, over her face and blocking out her vision, bulging from her top, the fabric still struggling to contain her body.
“Okay oh WOW this is a success!” Jade tugged at her fabric, trying to keep it from coming apart. “Does anyone have a spare… anything, to borrow!? I’m gonna have a moment, here!”
Karkat, blushing red at the side of so much of Jade where the front of her top had popped open to show even more of herself, wordlessly removed her cape and tossed it at her. She caught it and covered herself from the front. “Ah, nice! Thanks, Karkat.” He grunted in response.
Dave got up awkwardly. “I’ll… uh. I’ll take you back to the shop, okay?” He checked a time piece. “And my break is almost up. I can drop in a tailor, tell them to give you a hand.”
“Sure, that’d be good!” Jade said, calming down. She squeezed herself, giggling. “Ooh. even bouncier.”
“Jade, please focus, hon.”
“Yeah, yeah. Okay.” She tightened the cloak. “I’m sorry, Jane, Karkat, Terezi! I’ll, uh, try to polish that.”
Terezi was still gaping. She remembered eras when mortalkind had reshaped their bodies with as much ease as changing their clothing but still… that was something! “That’s okay… I’d definitely like a sample of that, sometime.”
“Same here,” Jane said meekly.
“We’ll be keeping the tailors in business, that’s for sure,” karkat said dryly, and it hit them so unexpectedly, they burst into nervous laughter for a moment. “Calm down guys… it wasn’t that funny…”
Jade and Dave got up; for Jade, with a lot of outward jiggling that seriously strained the remaining fabric of her worker’s smock. She staggered out, trying to adjust to her new body, Dave at her side the whole time. She then peeked back in, people outside making murmuring comments, and waved at Karkat and Terezi, her massive body-framing hair swishing as much as Terezi’s tail. “Buh-bye, you guys!” She ducked out, back to her duties.
Jane scooted back. “Um. I gotta get back to it, too. See you guys later, maybe?” She smiled awkwardly, blushing faintly and behind her spectacles, her gaze suggested a hint of what might become infatuation for Terezi. “Feel free to come back any time, the both of you…!”
“Sure thing,” Terezi said, scooting back. Karkat stood up off her, and Terezi rose to her full towering height.
The both of them left not long after, and Terezi explained what she needed right now; he was prepared for it, but wasn’t particularly happy about that.
The two of them headed off, and she followed Karkat as he led her back up the hill they’d come from, towards the outlying regions of the town.
Where the big livestock was kept.
-----
Eventually, this led to the pair of them walking nearer to the forest than most of the town normally went.
Here, the pens rose high and thick, heavily reinforced to prevent the livestock from smashing through or jumping over, or an occasional rustler from making off with the livestock. There WAS a collection box on the paddocks, though; for an informal purchase, someone could take the livestock as long as they paid the price, without repercussions. Terezi was counting on that, too.
Karkat seemed to have something on his mind, too.
As Terezi sniffed the air, looking for the right scent of meat, Karkat frowned speculatively. Shep wicked up on that, and turned towards him. “Something on your mind?”
“Mm, I don’t know.” He mulled it over, and finally said, “Why’d you tell them that thing back in town? That you’re a descendant of priests or whatever?”
“I didn’t say that, specifically.” She raised a claw, thoughtfully. “Just that I have a magic the temple reacts to, and that I’ve HEARD that I’m a descendant of the people worshipping there. I never said anything for sure, and I didn’t lie.” Karkat frowned. “It’s true; sometimes I’ve incarnated as a member of the families that used to maintain it, so we could keep up. Wasn’t an option this time.” She frowned. For a moment, she mourned. For her cult, now seemingly lost to antiquity. For all the things lost, seemingly never to be remembered. For the way time seemed to just flow on, swallowing up even things that a goddess thought should endure indefinitely.
Karkat reached up, hesitantly, and squeezed her hand. She squeezed back, warmly.
“It’s okay,” She said quietly. “I don’t like lying, or something close to it. But I can’t just tell them the truth yet. Maybe someday.”
Karkat sighed. “Yeah. I know.”
She started to say more, and then the words caught in her mouth, her thoughts froze up, and the hunger in her gut, unsatisfied with bread (not that she could bear to tell Jane, who seemed so very vulnerable), demanded to be filled.
Meat.
Terezi followed the scent, and Karkat, blurting indignant sounds to himself, hurried after her.
The trail sooned stopped at a pen, occupied by a breed of animal carefully bred by the Nitram family over the years, and the walls of the pen were especially high, but this wasn’t necessary as the beasts in question so docile, and dense, that the thought of moving further than it took to get to the nearest bit of swill wouldn’t occur to them.
Karkat got a glimpse of one, as Terezi flapped her wings and flew right into the pen and walked through it, striding towards the very one he was looking at. The creatures in question were generally called meat-beasts; variants of cow-beasts with chimerical elements of other creatures wrapped up into a very productive, powerful and dull-witted package.
They were also, in a word, fucking huge. Almost sixteen feet long, the whole creature was, basically, round; a huge mass of succulent meat, so bulky that it curved in a rough sphere, with short but very thick legs to support its mass. It’s head was effectively a tub, with short and nubby horns mostly used as steering for anyone who had to ride and wrangle one of them. Nearly twice as high as a troll, and close to being as big as Terezi herself, it was simply too large for most local predators to be a genuine threat. The creature looked slightly up at her with a calm absence of thought, its eyes staring blankly into nothing as it chewed on a mouthful.
It had to weigh several tons, at the very least, of raw muscle and flesh. Nevertheless, Terezi easily lifted it up with a single hand, raising it high into the air, steadying it with another hand. Her mouth watered, and her belly gurgled, crying out for fresh meat.
Her mouth opened. Her jaws widened. At first, noticeably wider than a normal troll might, and then gaping out wider still.
Karkat, aware that this would be a trend and resigned to it, went off to the relevant paddock and stuffed some money into it. Terezi’s breakfast wouldn’t be free, after all.
And all the while, Terezi’s jaws kept widening, so far that it was absolutely impossible by any normal measure of biology, even glowing faintly as her divine powers allowed her to mold her shape as she pleased. Her throat glowed from within, a teal light shining like a volcano.
The meat-beast made a clucking sound (for reasons no one was especially clear on, besides one Nitram stating ‘somehow, a chicken got into the gestation mix’) as Terezi lowered its head into the impossibly distended, gaping chasm below. She judged her mouth to be big enough to capture her meal, and slowly, savoring the moment, she pulled its head into her mouth.
Now it mooed, the sound muffled and distorted by her throat. The shape of its head appeared, pressing against the skin of her throat.
More of its body slid in as she slowly pressed it down, murmuring deep and savoring noises as her tongue slid along its underside, and she experienced every aspect of its existence, lending it a unique and special flavor.
Her meal slid downwards, her throat greasing the way with copious amounts of saliva that was probably cold, and now it bleated in something approaching, if not alarm, at least awareness that this was a new experience. Down it began to slide, her throat swelling with its body mass and the muscles within her slackening and pulling in turn, its greased path aided by the power of her body. Karkat’s eyes widened, impressed and disturbed at the same time: it was so big! How was she fitting it down!?
Her throat swelled out. By about a foot, and then several feet, and then more. There was seemingly no limit to the give of her body.
The beast began to slide down its inexorable path into the certain doom of her gut. So much meat! Terezi softly cried out, against it, with how good it was tasting already!
God she’d missed real meat. Twitching and thick and solid, already good to dissolve inside her belly, it was almost as good as reverent sacrifice.
Her tongue slid out, growing impossibly long and thick. It doubled back, rolling inside her mouth and pushing it’s hindquarters deeper in, and with that, the beast was being swallowed faster, now its entire front half a big, solid lump in her throat. Her skin bulged out with his weight, by nearly six feet of roundness and tangled forelimbs, giving the strange appearance of a frog.
More and more of it slid in. The massive lump in her throat, trapped by her ravenous body, grew even bigger. Eight feet out… then ten… then twelve… and still more, sliding inwards.
And then, it was just a pair of legs sticking out of her mouth. Now she tilted her head up and, relishing every moment of the heady taste, the pulse against the inside of her mouth, the feeling of something inside her about to become part of her, she gently slurped it down.
The lump in her neck traveling downwards. The front of the beast, which gave no indication that it was bothered by its situation, and then a smaller lumb as its hind legs moved against the inside of her throat. The lump kept moving downwards, disappearing above her breasts…
Karkat thought he heard a splash as her belly surged out, doubling, no, tripling in size, and then getting even bigger as the whole creature settled into her gut. Her belly hit the ground and rolled forwards, skin tight around the image of her meal, a fleshy log extending away from her and nearly sixteen feet out,and above it (her breasts propped up by this last bit) was her pregnancy, a more defined shape compared to her digesting gut.
One to create life, one to consume it. There was poetry, in that.
Now Terezi raised her head again, and produced a small, soft sound that might have been a dignified belch, but even as loud as she could be, it was hard to hear.
Her gigantic belly squirmed, and shifted, not with struggles but her captive prey getting comfortable inside her, even as the digestion process began. The outline softened as fluids began to pour in, not yet dissolving the beast (that would take several hours, at least) but giving it more room to float inside her. Her gut seemed to get slightly bigger, too, and it was already larger than she was.
Terezi slapped her gut happily. Her eyes flickered as her food started to get… pickled, he supposed, for that very digestion to take place. “Ohhh, YEAH, that feels good…!” Her wings flapped, and she flew upwards, over the paddock. She grabbed Karkat, ignoring his angry shouts, and flew off a short distance away.
She alighted near a tree, near the forest, in a secluded place, and sat against the ground.
She held Karkat to her belly; against her pregnancy, and the gurgling lump where her food was being processed, turning it into nutritious mush over the next few hours.
“Hey!” Karkat said. “What’s with the man-handling!?”
“Shush…” she cooed. “I thought you liked being man-handled by me~”
“Okay. Well, yes. Maybe.” He didn’t fight or argue, this time, as she again pulled him close.
He could feel her heart beating.
A calm, deep thudding, and it beat in sync with his own.
Her belly was firm, and the movement of her belly muscles around the massive animal beneath him was strangely… calming. The gurgling sounds from beneath felt so loud that they might have come from all around him. Her arms pulled him closer, squishing him into the upper slope of her stomach, and his head sliding into between her breasts.
“Come on,” she said softly. “Just you and me. Just for a bit.”
He closed his eyes, and held her, letting himself be pulled against her. “Yeah, yeah. Okay.”
She held him to her body, against her stomach and what would one day be her family. The sounds of her digestion soothed them both, and her wings flared as Karkat calmed down completely, and her wings swept forward to wrap over him, embracing them.
It was like cuddling inside a blanket. But the mattress was Terezi, and so was the blanket itself; it was all her, embracing him so completely. And for her, someone who would stay with her always, loyal to the very end… and coming back from that end, no matter how long it took.
She closed her eyes, in relief. Again, to this precious moment they had returned. As they would again and again, like the turning of seasons. Winter had passed, and now the relief of spring was here. As she’d always wanted. As what she hoped it would one day stay.
She held him tighter. She didn’t want to let him go. And then, the particulars of their reunion didn’t seem to matter so much; not the time or place, not the way the world had forgotten her. He was still her Vantas, however the world changed.
And then her belly gurgled again, juices flooding in, making her gut swell a bit. It made Karkat’s body rise up, sliding even more between her breasts. He didn’t mind; the beat of her heart was even louder now.
And the both of them just held one another, peacefully in the forest.
----
Much later, night came, and with it, he brought her to what would be her home.
“Sorry,” He muttered sheepishly, holding onto the tip of her tail. “Not as good as, eh. Whatever you’re used to.”
Terezi impishly gave him a gentle smack with her tail, laughing. Her stomach was smaller now, though still rounder than it had been, padded more with fat. The beast had been digested, meat and bone and every single inch of it melted away. Terezi’s breasts looked a bit larger, as did her hips, her thighs and butt, all more padded than usual. “Well, I don’t remember what that was actually like too well, at this level of existence, so me neither! Guess I’ll have to make do.”
Karkat’s house, looming high over them, was a humble building and not at all a luxurious home; almost as old as the temple and constructed in a very similar style (though simpler, and without the opulence of the temple), and the thing that stood out about it to the both of them, to any passerby, was that the doorway was alarmingly high, well over a few feet higher than Terezi herself.
It even cleared her long horns; she could walk right through it with ease. The whole home was built to her specifications, in fact; looking from the outside, it was reasonable to think that every room would be just as grand, for such a large troll as her to have without any issues at all.
This explained the furniture, Karkat realized. The chairs, the tables; it was all strictly divided into being the right size for him and being far too large for a normal troll… or at least ones, it dawned on him, if they weren’t Terezi-sized.
He opened the door, leading her in. “Well,” he said, his grouchy exterior faltering to show a genuine smile. He extended a hand. “Welcome home. Again.”
She took his hand warmly. “Glad to be back.”
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TOP 10 FUNNY ANIMALS OF ALL TIME:
1. The Great White Shark: This one is a little controversial, but I think it's pretty funny. It's the Great White Shark! There have been many movies about this creature, and they all seem to be based on the same book by Jaws author Peter Benchley. In this book, the shark was unintentionally murderous. Benchley's other works include The Island of Doctor Moreau, an infamous tale of scientific experimentation gone wrong. I guess the shark was just misunderstood. What could be funnier than killing large creatures that people fear? How is that not funny? In all seriousness, the shark has been involved in several attacks, but for some reason people find the stories very funny to read about when they're not the victims.
2. Pirates: Once a year, the waters around the Delmarva Peninsula become a hunting ground for pirate ships. These pirates primarily consist of New England sea captains looking to make a little extra money on the side. There is some dispute as to why these pirates visit these particular waters, however there is no disagreement that they do. The pirates generally attack and pillage any ship they see, but it is not uncommon for them to focus specifically on any ship that carries fish or fruit. Usually these unfortunate victims have one or both of their hands cut off, as the pirates consider this to be fair compensation for the fruit and fish that were stolen.
3. The Sloth: Unlike other animals on this list, the sloth's crime was not intentional. In fact, it couldn't really do much harm even if it tried. The sloth is a lazy creature, and its favorite pastime seems to be eating trees. That's right, eating. Sloths are the biggest culprits of destroying jungle environments, as they digest trees so slowly that they can eat a entire batch of leaves before they eventually turn into maggots and fall to the ground. The animals are so slow that they're usually eaten by predators before they can do any major damage. However, this list is about funny animals, not the extinction of sloths.
4. The Antifa:
5. Trolls: Trolls are another kind of animal that eats trees, but instead of sloths, they use wear oversized cloths. Trolls are so large that they often eat their own species, and can grow up to be 20 feet tall. Trolls are believed to live in the Green Swamp, although no evidence of their existence has ever been found. Many explorers have searched for these elusive creatures in that area, but none have returned. Several theories exist for their possible disappearance, the two most likely being trolls or the gradual filling of the swamp due to the raising of water levels by climate change.
6. Ghosts: Ghosts are perhaps the biggest pain in your rear when it comes to living. First, they're basically incorporeal beings who can't do shit to you. Second, whenever you do see one, it runs the fuck away as soon as it sees you. What's worse, ghosts are surprisingly smart. They know every nook and cranny of your house, and can take refuge in the most obscure places. The only way to get rid of a ghost is to drag its ass out.
7. Sharks: You've probably seen the Predator movies. You know the type, they're the big ass fish that can fly and live in water. Well, in the Bahamas, there are types of aquatic predators that meet those criteria, and they've been known to eat humans. On top of being large and flying, the marine life in the Bahamas is constantly exposed to radiation from the nearby base (and falling out of the sky) and from the ocean floor itself. This has given rise to creatures such as the manta, which can grow to be 12 feet long and have a 12 inch tongue, which they use to strangle prey. Mantas are fairly uncommon, but it's not impossible that you might come across one.
8. Land Mantas: Mantas aren't the only type of shark in the water that meets the criteria of being able to eat you. There are several types of nurse sharks that can grow up to 6 feet long and have been known to eat fish, octopus, and even small caimans. These types of sharks tend to be less aggressive than their brethren, but that doesn't mean they aren't deadly. The main threat from nurse sharks is their jaw. It's not the size of their mouth that does damage, but rather the size of their teeth. This means they are capable of crushing much larger fish and other sea creatures than their size would suggest.
9. Sea Cows: As previously stated, the ocean floor around you is infested with great white sharks that could easily exceed 20 feet in length. However, there are also species such as the great white cow (go figure) that grow to be around twice that size. This means there could be a great white cow swimming around the ocean that is more than capable of killing you. Add to this the fact that the area is also home to evil sea cows, which are sentient species of large sea cow which have been known to attack, and will do so in the right circumstances.
10. Parrots: Parrots. You may not run into any in this situation, but if you ever get to the New England it's a safe bet you'll encounter several different types of them. Having been to the New England before, you already know that they are prone to inhabit trees. This means they're going to be scary as fuck when they let you know they're nearby by shouting shit like "Wicked!" and "Pissed!" at you while you're trying to work or sleep or something. I feel like this is a good stopping point for now. If I think of anything else, I'll update this guide.
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Exhaustion
Fandom: Trollhunters
Ships: None
Jim dragged his feet as he made his way to the Hero’s Forge, kicking a stone out of his path, glaring daggers at the floor like it was challenging him. Toby walked beside him, glancing at his best friend worridley. Jim had barely said a word since school finished, and the Toby had a feeling he knew what was bothering him. Jim stayed up most of the night studying for a test, and by the looks of things, the exam hadn’t gone well.
They were near the Hero’s Forge when Toby braved a question.
“Hey Jim?” He decided to not use ‘Jimbo’, fearing that Jim would snap at the nickname, this was a dangerous mood the Trollhunter was in. “Are you sure you can’t just ask Blinky to take the day off?” Toby asked, worriedly scanning Jim up and down. “You look like you’re about to pass out-”
“I’m fine Tobes” Jim’s voice had an edge to it. “I gotta train, if I don’t, I’ll fall behind and next time I fight Bular, he will kick my-“
“Okay okay I get it” Toby reassured, lightly patting Jim’s shoulder, “just...take it easy, okay?”
Jim gave a curt nod, shoving his hands into his pockets. Toby’s heart sunk, he hadn’t seen Jim like this in years, the test must have really crashed and burned.
The pair entered the ominous structure of the Hero’s Forge, the statutes of Trollhunters looking down at them. Blinky, Arrrghh, and Draal were standing at the centre of the Forge, discussing who knows what when the multi eyed troll looked up.
“Master Jim! Tobias! I thought you two weren’t going to make it!” Blinky smiled.
“Hey Blinky” Toby greeted while Jim merely gave a half hearted wave.
“Right then, Jim you will be sparring with Draal today,” Blinky said, “then afterwards we will study Volume thirty four of Troll Law.”
“Cool” Jim mumbled, taking out the amulet of Daylight and moving to the side of the Forge.
Blinky watched in surprise, taking in Jim’s slumped shoulders and tired aura. “Is Master Jim feeling ill?” Blinky asked Toby quietly.
“No, he pulled another all nighter studying for an exam and I think it went badly” Toby replied, noting how when Jim armoured up, he slumped even more under its weight.
“Oh...that is unfortunate” Blinky tapped his fingers against his chin in thought. “Draal?”
The blue troll looked over at Blinky. “Maybe go a bit easier on him today? His reflex’s will be hindered due to his lack of sleep, I don’t want him having a broken limb or have a concussion.”
“I understand,” Draal blew air through his nose. “I too see the Trollhunter isn’t at his best.”
“Thank you.”
Draal went to the weapons rack, picking out a sword and moving to Jim who was beginning to tether sideways.
“Trollhunter.”
Jim started, looking up at Draal in surprise.
“You ready?”
Jim scrubbed at his eyes, materialising the sword of Daylight. “Yeah, just-” Jim stifled a yawn, “Can we not turn on the Forge this time?”
Draal was about to disagree then he really looked at the boy in front of him. He was exhausted, looked dead on his feet and his legs looked like they were trembling a little. Quite frankly, he looked like he was about to collapse right then and there. Draal rested a gentle hand on Jim’s shoulder. “Yes Trollhunter, I think we can leave it off for today.”
The look of relief on Jim’s face only increased Draal’s worry.
The sparring was painful for Draal. He felt awful with every swing he sent at the Trollhunter, who was barely able to lift his sword in time to block it. Jim almost tripped three times, had been thrown across the room twice, and hadn’t won a single round. Blinky, Arrrgh and Toby watched from the sidelines, wincing as Jim took a hard hit to the chest.
“Jim slow” Arrrgh rumbled, bright green eyes watching worriedly.
“He’s not doing good... Blinky?” Toby looked over at the multi limbed troll who sighed with a nod.
“I agree you two, I think it would be best if I call this off-“
“TROLLHUNTER!”
Draal’s shout made the trio jump and look round, their hearts leaping into their mouths. Jim had collapsed, and hadn’t gotten back up.
“Master Jim!”
“JIMBO!”
“Jim!”
The three of them sped to where Draal was carefully sitting the boy up, gently shaking him. The amulet had fallen from the boy’s chest, now sitting on the floor of the Forge.
“He just fell! I didn’t even touch him!” Draal began worriedly.
“It must have been the exhaustion,” Blinky bit his lip, gently running a hand over Jim’s head. “Bring him to my library, he’ll be more comfortable there.”
________________________________
Jim didn’t want to wake up. The darkness was inviting, he was comfortably warm, and everything hurt. He felt like he’d run a marathon then fell into the ocean. Moving felt impossible right now.
‘Wait, why am I sore? I didn’t fight Bular recently......did I?’
“Master Jim?”
Blinky. That sounded like Blinky. Why did he sound so worried?
“Master Jim please open your eyes for me?”
‘Nooooo’ Jim internally groaned, but if Blinky was worried, it was serious.
Reluctantly, the young Trollhunter lifted his heavy eyelids. The first thing he saw was Blinky, unease etched into his face and hands clasped together. Toby, Arrrgh and Draal were standing nearby, all wearing expressions of varying degrees of concern.
The second Blinky saw Jim’s eyes open his shoulders slumped in relief, eyeridges falling from their high perch. “Oh Master Jim, thank Deya you’re awake.”
“Ugh, Blink?” Jim winced at his own voice that was husky and weak. “What...what happened?”
“You passed out,” Toby appeared at his right side, a hand gently coming down to rest on his shoulder “in the Hero’s Forge, Arrrgh carried you here.”
Jim flicked his eyes over to the Krubera troll who gave him a smile that Jim could barely return. He sunk further into...what was he lying on??
Jim carefully angled himself to see that he was nestled in a small mountain of blankets and pillows. And a further inspection told him that he was in the centre of Blinky’s library.
“You were fighting Draal, Master Jim, when you collapsed. Gave us all quite a scare” Blinky told him.
Jim shrunk in on himself, not used to worrying the people around him. “Oh...sorry.”
“No need to apologise Master Jim, but from now on, I do expect you to tell me if you aren’t feeling up to your usual standards. We could’ve spent the lesson in here, I would’ve been delighted to read you some history of trolls.”
Jim hung his head, looking away from Blinky’s eyes, fingers clenching the fabric of his jeans. “Sorry...”
Blinky looked at Toby who glanced meaningfully at Jim then back to the troll. Blinky took a breath, mentally preparing his next words.
“Master Jim? Can you look at me please?”
The boy seemed to curl further into himself, fingers tightening on his clothing.
Blinky kneeled down next to the boy. “Jim?”
Jim, hearing that Blinky had dropped his usual title, slowly lifted his eyes to the troll. The multi limbed troll felt his heart crack at the vulnerable, and almost afraid look in Jim’s eyes,
“Jim” Blinky said, “if you aren’t feeling well, I want you to tell me. If you need a break, I want you to tell me. I am your mentor, and your friend, I understand why you would need time away from training. You’re human, and have school to worry about. You have so much on your plate and it is unfair of me to ask so much of you. I will give you time to recover if you need it, and am here to listen if you ever need to talk, or vent to anyone.” Blinky gently rested his upper hand on Jim’s shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze.
“Jim, you mean a lot to me, so when you push yourself like this, it does worry me. You collapsing in the Hero’s Forge almost made me have a full on panic attack. Everyone in this room cares about you Jim, please don’t forget that.”
Jim’s mouth was slightly open as Blinky finished his speech, then to Blinky’s alarm, his eyes began to glisten with tears.
“Oh! Jim! I’m sorry if I said something wrong! I didn’t mean to make you-”
Blinky was cut off when Jim wrapped his arms tightly around Blinky, face buried in his chest. Jim’s shoulders shook as he whispered a soft “thank you” before he gave away a quiet sob.
Blinky’s expression softened, bringing up his own arms to tenderly hug the boy he had come to see as his own son. “Of course Jim, I meant what I said, every word.”
A weak smile finally lifted Jim’s lips. He tightened the hug, craving the comfort being given to him by his father figure.
Toby, Arrrgh, and Draal watched the sweet scene fondly, silently deciding among themselves that they wouldn’t interrupt the serenity of the scene before them.
#trollhunters#jim#toby#blinky#draal#arrrgh#fanfic#I’m a sucker for Blinky and Jim’s father/son relationship okay??#please be kind#I haven’t written in awhile#my fanfic
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WHAT I HAVE BEEN READING LATELY
Kage Baker’s Company Series
In the Garden of Iden
Sky Coyote
Mendoza in Hollywood
The Graveyard Game
The Life of the World to Come
The Children of the Company
The Machine's Child
The Sons of Heaven
The Empress of Mars
Not Less than Gods
Nell Gwynne's On Land and At Sea
Black Projects, White Knights: The Company Dossiers
Gods and Pawns
In the Company of Thieves
Ø Science Fiction written by a woman with Asperger’s. Wildly uneven. Main protagonist is female, but there are lots of POV characters, male and female.
Ø Big ideas.
Ø Lots of adventure, some action.
Ø Small doses of humor.
Neil Gaiman
Good Omens (with Sir Terry Pratchett)
Neverwhere
Stardust
American Gods
Anansi Boys
The Graveyard Book
The Ocean at the End of the Lane
Ø Neil’s books are a road trip with Carl Jung, Joseph Campbell and a baggie full of sativa.
Ø Ideas are incidental. The Milieu’s in charge.
Ø Adventure happens whether you like it or not.
Ø Cosmic humor. The joke’s on us.
Connie Willis’s Oxford Time Travel Series
Firewatch
Doomsday Book
To Say Nothing of the Dog (and the novel that inspired it – Jerome K. Jerome’s Three Men in a Boat)
Blackout/All Clear
Assorted:
The Last of the Winnebagos
Ø Connie loves her historical research. Blackout/All Clear actually lasts as long as the Blitz, but anything in the Oxford Time Travel series is worth reading. Doomsday Book reads like prophecy in retrospect.
Ø One idea: Hi! This is the human condition! How fucking amazing is that?!?
Ø Gut-punch adventure with extra consequences. Background action.
Ø I’d have to say that Doomsday Book is the funniest book about the black death I’ve ever read, which isn’t saying much. To Say Nothing of the Dog is classic farce, though. Girl’s got range.
Neal Stephenson
Snow Crash (After the apocalypse, the world will be ruled by Home-Owners Associations. Be afraid.)
Cryptonomicon
Anathem
Seveneves
Ø Neal writes big, undisciplined, unfocused books that keep unfolding in your mind for months after you’ve read them. He’s a very guy-type writer, in spite of a female protagonist or two. Seveneves, be warned, starts out brilliant and devolves into extreme meh.
Ø Big. Fucking. Ideas.
Ø Battles, crashes, fistfights, parachute jumps, nuclear powered motorcycles and extreme gardening action. Is there an MPAA acronym for that?
Ø Humor dry enough to be garnished with two green olives on a stick.
Christopher Moore
Pine Cove Series:
Practical Demonkeeping
The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove
The Stupidest Angel: A Heartwarming Tale of Christmas Terror (Okay, yeah, Christmas. But Christmas with zombies, so that’s all right.)
Fluke (Not strictly Pine Cove, but in the same universe. Ever wonder why whales sing? They’re ordering Pastrami sandwiches. I’m not kidding.)
Death Merchant Chronicles:
A Dirty Job
Secondhand Souls (Best literary dogs this side of Jack London)
Coyote Blue (Kind of an outlier. Overlapping characters)
Shakespeare Series:
Fool
The Serpent of Venice
Shakespeare for Squirrels
Assorted:
Island of the Sequined Love Nun (Cargo cults with Pine Cove crossovers. I have a theory that the characters in this book are direct descendants of certain characters in Stephenson’s Cryptonomicon.)
Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal (So I have a favorite first-century wonder rabbi. Who doesn’t?)
Sacre Bleu
Noir
Ø Not for the squeamish, the easily offended, or those who can’t lovingly embrace the fact that the human species is pretty much a bunch of idiots snatching at moments of grace.
Ø No big ideas whatever. Barely any half-baked notions.
Ø Enthusiastic geek adventure. Action as a last resort.
Ø Nonstop funny from beginning to end.
Ben Aaronovitch’s Rivers of London Series
Rivers of London
Moon Over Soho
Whispers Under Ground
Broken Homes
Foxglove Summer
The Hanging Tree
The Furthest Station
Lies Sleeping
The October Man
False Value
Tales From the Folly
Ø Lean, self-deprecating police procedurals disguised as fantasy novels. Excellent writing.
Ø These will not expand your mind. They might expand your Latin vocabulary.
Ø Crisply described action, judiciously used. Whodunnit adventure. It’s all about good storytelling.
Ø Generous servings of sly humor. Aaronovitch is a geek culture blueblood who drops so many inside jokes, there are websites devoted to indexing them.
John Scalzi
Old Man’s War Series:
Old Man’s War
Questions for a Soldier
The Ghost Brigades
The Sagan Diary
The Last Colony
Zoe’s Tale
After the Coup
The Human Division
The End of All Things
Ø Star Trek with realpolitik instead of optimism.
Ø The Big Idea is that there’s nothing new under the sun. Nor over it.
Ø Action-adventure final frontier saga with high stakes.
Ø It’s funny when the characters are being funny, and precisely to the same degree that the character is funny.
Assorted:
The Dispatcher
Murder by Other Means
Redshirts (Star Trek, sideways, with occasional optimism)
Ø Scalzi abandons (or skewers) his space-opera tendencies with these three little gems of speculative fiction. Scalzi’s gift is patience. He lets the scenario unfold like a striptease.
Ø What-if thought experiments that jolt the brain like espresso shots.
Ø Action/misadventure as necessary to accomplish the psychological special effects.
Ø Redshirts is satire, so the humor is built-in, but it’s buried in the mix.
David Wong/Jason Pargin
John Dies at the End
This Book is Full of Spiders: Seriously, Dude, Don’t Touch It
What the Hell Did I Just Read?
Ø Pargin clearly starts his novels with a handful of arresting scenes and images, then looses the characters on an unsuspecting world to wander wither they will.
Ø Ideas aren’t as big or obvious as Heinlein, but they are there to challenge all your assumptions in the same way that Heinlein’s were.
Ø Classic action/adventure for anyone raised on Scooby-Doo.
Ø Occasional gusts of humor in a climate that’s predominantly tongue-in-cheek.
Jodi Taylor’s Chronicles of St. Mary’s Series
Just One Damned Thing After Another
The Very First Damned Thing
A Symphony of Echoes
When a Child is Born*
A Second Chance
Roman Holiday*
A Trail Through Time
Christmas Present*
No Time Like the Past
What Could Possible Go Wrong?
Ships and Stings and Wedding Rings*
Lies, Damned Lies and History
The Great St Mary’s Day Out*
My Name is Markham*
And the Rest is History
A Perfect Storm*
Christmas Past*
An Argumentation of Historians
The Battersea Barricades*
The Steam Pump Jump*
And Now for Something Completely Different*
Hope for the Best
When Did You Last See Your Father?*
Why Is Nothing Ever Simple*
Plan For The Worst
The Ordeal of the Haunted Room
Ø The * denotes a short story or novella. Okay, try to imagine Indiana Jones as a smartassed redheaded woman with a time machine and a merry band of full contact historians. I love history, and I especially love history narrated by a woman who can kick T. Rex ass.
Ø The ideas are toys, not themes. Soapy in spots.
Ø Action! Adventure! More action! More adventure! Tea break. Action again!
Ø Big, squishy dollops of snort-worthy stuff.
Laurie R. King’s Mary Russell Series
The Beekeeper's Apprentice
A Monstrous Regiment of Women
A Letter of Mary
The Moor
Jerusalem
Justice Hall
The Game
Locked Rooms
The Language of Bees
The God of the Hive
Beekeeping for Beginners
Pirate King
Garment of Shadows
Dreaming Spies
The Marriage of Mary Russell
The Murder of Mary Russell
Mary Russell's War And Other Stories of Suspense
Island of the Mad
Riviera Gold
The Art of Detection (Strictly speaking, this is in the action!lesbian Detective Kate Martinelli series, but it crosses over to the Sherlock Holmes genre. If you’ve ever wondered how Holmes would deal with the transgendered, this is the book.)
Ø Sherlock Holmes retires to Sussex, keeps bees, marries a nice Jewish girl who is smarter than he is and less than half his age and he’s mentored since she was fifteen in an extremely problematic power dynamic relationship that should repulse me but doesn’t, somehow, because this is the best Sherlock Holmes pastiche out there. Mary should have been a rabbi, but it is 1920, so she learns martial arts and becomes an international detective instead. Guest appearances by Conan Doyle, Kimball O’Hara, T.E. Lawrence, Cole Porter, and the Oxford Comma.
Ø Nothing mind-expanding here, unless the levels of meta present in a fictional world that is about how the fictional world might not be as fictional as you thought come as a surprise to anyone in the era of tie-in books, films, tv, interactive social media and RPGs.
Ø If these two geniuses can’t catch the bad guys with their dazzling brilliance, they will happily kick some ass. Adventure takes center stage and the action sequences are especially creative.
Ø Amusement is afoot.
Jasper Fforde’s Thursday Next Series
The Eyre Affair
Lost in a Good Book
The Well of Lost Plots
Something Rotten
First Among Sequels
One of Our Thursdays is Missing
The Woman Who Died a Lot
Ø In a world where Librarians are revered and Shakespeare is more popular than the Beatles, someone has to facilitate the weekly anger-management sessions for the characters of Wuthering Heights, if only to keep them from killing each other before the novel actually ends. That someone is Thursday Next – Literature Cop.
Ø Mind-bending enough to give Noam Chomsky material for another hundred years.
Ø Adventure aplenty. Action? Even the punctuation will try to kill you.
Ø This is a frolicsome look at humorous situations filled with funny people. Pretty much a full house in the laugh department.
Sir Terry Pratchett’s Discworld Series/City Watch Arc
Guards! Guards!
Men at Arms
Feet of Clay
Jingo
The Fifth Elephant
Night Watch
Thud!
Snuff
Raising Steam
Ø If this were a game of CLUE, the answer would be Niccolo Machiavelli in Narnia with a Monty Python. Everything you think you know about books with dragons and trolls and dwarves and wizards is expertly ripped to shreds and reassembled as social satire that can save your soul, even if it turns out you don’t really have one. Do not be fooled by the Tolkien chassis – there’s a Vonnegut-class engine at work.
Ø Caution: Ideas in the Mirror Universe May be Larger Than They Appear
Ø The City Watch arc has plenty of thrilling action sequences. Some other of the fifty-million Discworld novels have less. Every one of them is nonstop adventure. Most of the adventure, however, takes the form of characters desperately trying to avoid thrilling action sequences.
Ø Funny? Even though I’ve read every book in the series at least ten times, I still have to make sure I have cold packs on hand in case I laugh so hard I rupture something.
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The Aquarium part 2
the sharktrolls kept swimming North fit about a few hours until Adam stopped.
Adam: We're here. "Swims upward"
The sharktrolls follow adam to the surface. All they saw was a wall of fog. Tank growled in frustration.
Tank: There's no island here! Is just fog! Are you sure your calculation was correct?!
Torrent: Tank, calm yourself!
Brick: So these trolls live in a wall of fog. How do they see?
Adam rolls his eyes.
Adam: No, you dummy. The island they live in is BEHIND the fog. If we keep swimming straight we'll reach it. Lets form a chain so we don't get separated.
They all formed a chain and swam into the fog. A half an hour had past when the fog finally cleared revealing an island with a giant waterfall. There was no one in sight.
Adam: Hmm, I don't see the ship anywhere. A ship as big as you described should be simple to spot.
Brick: Maybe it went behind that big waterfall.
Everyone stared at brick with astonished looks.
Brick: What?
Adam: that's actually not a bad idea. I've read in a book where these pirates had an underground hideout where the entrance was a waterfall.
Torrent: Good work brick and Adam. You three search at the waterfall. We'll look around underwater.
The Three salute their captain and swam towards the waterfall. Tank and Torrent swam back underwater and searched below the island. They were headed towards the back when they saw a glow of light.
Tank: what's that? "Swims towards light"
They swam towards the light and saw a HUGE underwater tank filled with many different ocean creatures.
Torrent: Is this some kind of aquarium? ....Tank?
Tank wasn't listening, he was frozen in shock. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. It was Tide and their guppies, looking out the edge of the tank into the ocean. He started to tear up. Regaining his colors he swam as fast as he could towards them.
"With Tide"
Tide was pretty ticked off. The reason why was because of what happened an hour before.
"Earlier that day"
Catonus: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, BOYS AND GIRLS I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT!! My crew and I have discovered something spectacular that we want to share with you!! Behold "pulls lever that lifts a curtain" THE SHARKTROLLS!!
Tide and Zips and the guppies were put on display in a big glass tank. The crowd oohed and aahed at this. Zips awkwardly waved at the crowd but stopped when he saw the look on Tide's face. Tide just "hmphed!" And turned away from the crowd. The guppies waved and giggled. Well not aqua he just hid in Tide's arms because the crowd was scaring him. Tide didn't like this so he growled at the crowd but that just made them more excited. This went on for the whole day until it was closing time.
Catonus: You all did marvelous today!! Now time to go back into your tank.
He pulled a lever and the 5 sharktrolls were sucked downward into a tunnel. They slide out into the aquarium.
Tide: "scoffs" the very NERVE of that troll!! We are NOT his trophies!! "Sighs and swims away"
Zips and the guppies really felt bad for Tide. They followed him to the edge of the tank looking out towards the ocean.
Zips: I know they're on their way. I just know it.
Tide: I still believe you but I'm starting to have my doubts.
Just then he spots something green in the distance charging towards them.
Tide: What is that? "Squints"
Zips looks out into the ocean and gasps in delight.
Zips: It's Tank and Torrent!! They're Here to save us!!
Tide gasps as he sees tank charging towards the glass tank. He waves at him to stop but he doesn't get the message and runs right into the glass. Tank slides down the glass groaning.
Tank: ...That hurt. "Groans"
Torrent: "swims up to tank" You ok?
Tank: ...yeah. "Turns to tide" TIDAL WAVE!! OLIVE, BLADE, AQUA!! YOU'RE ALL OK!!
Tide: TANK!!
Guppies: PAPA!! "Aqua smiles"
Torrent: ZIPS
Zips: TORRENT!!
They all put their heads against the glass, happy to see each other again.
To be continued
Sharktrolls belong to @sparklijam
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Story Masterpost
Hey! This took a while to make. But here, as promised, is my story masterpost. I’ve organized some things so you can find them easier, though I’ll admit that “Beauty, Secrets, and Magic” is just the stuff I couldn’t really sort into a smaller category.
Of the Fae
Unaware
Directions
Come
Running Water
Distant Wars
Wishes of the Sea
In Order To See You Must...
An Offer
Those who say...
Respect is Due
An Exchange
Cage
Come to Us
Ancient Wars
The Age of Iron
What are you?
Immortal
Hidden Among You
First Music
The Distant Days
Count them with Letters
Flower Wars
Eyes?
The Lost Ones
We Fade
Believing in Death
Prices to pay
Dance with the whole World
Dreaming Lure
*Click*
Giants Asleep
Fears of Darkness
Bigger Problems
Listen to the Giants
Sweet Faerie Wine
The Largest and Tiniest
Decay and Dreaming
Eyes and Earth
Walking Mountains
Battle Standard
Gnaall
Fictitious Dichotomy
Faltering Heartbeats
Among You
Pixie Wings
Unable to Perish
Bridge trolls
What is Fairy Ring?
Terrible Wars
Beautiful Dreams
Kisses in the Night
The Will of Trees
Make no Mistake
Have you Eaten?
Beauty and Fashion
Can you Calculate the Mind of the Fae
The First Skies
Do Fae Children Age at the Same Rate?
A Dark Memory
Black Dwarfs and Dark Futures
The Conversation
Vows of Love
Ship of the Skies
Reaching Hands
The Little Folk
The Prophet of Silvamune
Damhán Alla
Feasting
Lost in the Deep Woods
A way out?
Faerie Dance
Thrice Said is True
Fools rush in
The Deep Woods
Welcome to the Deep Woods
Places We Know
Silence
No Journey
Will-o-the-Wisp
Where are the Deep Woods?
A Dreaming Memory
Running
Who Knows the Path?
Unknown Footsteps
Who Speaks?
Go Home
Whispers in the Mist
Mossy Glades
Old Gate
An Echo of Footsteps
Follow Me
Tragic Ending
The Way Forward is Still Barred
Don’t Follow the Wisps
Postern
Never Know
Waterfall
When you Go Out
Gold-Eyed Beast
The Nightmare
Step Lightly
Bones Alone
Golden Eyed Beast
In Hiding
Forget what comes
Something Powerful
Standstill Death
Beware the Beast
The Encounter
Companion in the Cold
Slumbering
The Hunt Begins Again
Well of Dreaming Light
Screams in the Night
Where is the Gold-Eyed Beast?
Fear
Something has Changed
…3
…2
…1
The Crown of Shadow
7 Broken Mirrors
Seven
Seven Shattered Mirrors
Places of Faerie
A Faraway Place
You
The Places Between
Distant Wars
Buried beneath the Sand
Wandering Blind
The Lake
A Flowered Ocean
Exist? Or Not?
Life’s Flow
Door without a way
Time Never Passes Here
Only the Stories Remain
Cracking Ice
Fractal Prison
Enough?
All that remains is Dust
Devastation of Dark Fire
More of the Flowered Ocean
Cliffs of Illithia and the Naiuruin Forests
Beware the Wisps
Stardew
Deep Furnace
Lanterns
Lanterns
On the River’s Edge
The White Hound
Do the Fae have Animals?
An Old Lantern
Lost Letters
The Lament
Fragment
Silent Screams
The Wait
Together
A Near Forgotten Letter
Letter from a Brownie
Tell a Story
Lured Away
From the Sea and Shore
Warnings
Never Free
Don’t Stop
Eat Not
The Rule of Names
Defiance
Pretend Not To See
Swamp Water
Trust Me
Do not Take
Do Not
I Seek A Warning
8 Tales at the Hearth’s Edge
The Hill
A tale of Three Gifts
She and He
A Chance Meeting
The War (Coincidence?)
The Girl and the Road
Silver Charity
A Tale of Autumn
Strange Beings
The One Who Grieves
The Lady
The Librarians
Not Quite Human
Dark Eyed
Forge Fires
Together the Light
She danced upon the Earth
Crows for Eyes
Wings
Aeon
Circling
A Laughing God
Sssssss...
Broken Tomb
She danced in the Snow
The Dragon in the Well
What Became of Her...
The Prisoner in the Dark
She Knows Adventure
A Firebird Imprisoned
The Child
Mine
Spoken Before
The Descent
The Courts of Season
The Autumn Days
Great Sorrow
In the darkest days of Winter
The Winter Remains
Awakening of Spring
End of Summer
Wine and Summertime
Blustering Winds
The Lord of Autumn
The Winter Queen
Frost
The Autumn Court
Winter Masque
A Cold Truth
The Winter Court
Nearly Time
The End of Winter
The Lord of Springtime
The Court of Spring
Spring’s Song
Lovers of Springtime
Light after the Rain
The Time you Need
The Story of the One Who Grieves
Nobody Answered
...
It Comes Closer
Before the Silver Blossoms
A West Wind
It is Time
The End of Spring
Other Courts
A Courtly Vision
A Constellation of Myth
Court of Ashes
Hosts of Myrkvatn
Aiolion Tribes
Court of Dawn
Castle inside a Raindrop
Order
The Rivers of Athu
The Sidhe
The Valley of Ga’Maldor
Empire of the Seven Blossoms
Canyons of Mür ‘gra
Crowns
Long Ago Legends
Key to Destiny
The Second Key
The Third Key
Three KEYS?
About the Cave
Crown of Sunlight
New Moon
Summer’s End
What do the Crowns look like?
Court of Shadows
Autumn to Winter
Songs
Seek
Listen
Unknown
Follow
A Dark Call
Burning / Why is it burning?
Forgotten Prisoner
Chains
Come to the Faeries
Thorns and Dreaming
I Dreamed I Walked
Fernweh
Stories Told
Poetry
Bluest Sky
Blue
Red
Yellow
Orange
Loving Winter
Fire and Bone
Requiem of a Love Song
Eye See You
Green
Sleep among the Bluebells
Song of Stars
Night Companion
Dancing in the Forest
Moon Waters
Memory in Sepia
Lilies
Scream. Cry. Silence.
Drifting
Faerie Ring
Count Them Carefully
Fairy Ring Dance
Other Tales
The Pied Piper
Apples for Eternity
The Dam
Is anyone there?
Call to the Sea
Warmth
Midas
Grove of Shadows
Resting Place
All Hallows Evening Tale
The Great Tree
Sister of Mine
Wit and Words
Bread and Circuses
Forest and Sea in Sorrow
Reflection of the Heart Part 1
The Boy, The Troll, and the Bridge Between Them.
The Raven and the Stone Crow
Houses and Homes
Beauty, Secrets, and Magic
Seed
Rain Brings Life
Such Dreams
If Wishes
The Ancient Magic
Beginning or Ending?
Dive Into Silent Unknowns
Eternity
Like Leaves
Imagine you walk across the sand
Power of the Moonlight
Enchanted Trap
Rage
Confusion
Gifts of Stone
Longing for Other Selves
Darkened Waves
Hunt of the Owl
Not You
Forgotten.
Fairy Tales
Curse
Ravens
Come Look
Sun
Stars
Autumn Reflections
Drift
Gold beneath Grey
Union Incomparable
Names
Life’s Road
Fire in the Heart
A sort of Balance
Beauty of a Rose
Not what they seem
Glamour
Humanity’s Treasures
Compliments
Infinity
Why must you reject happiness?
A Sounding of Silence
Winds of Change
The Blessing of Indifference
In Tears we Grow
Beauty
A Raindrop
The Trouble With Masks
Lunar Eclipse
Fly Ahead
Be Ready
Ugliness and Beauty
The Secret of Bridges
Morning?
Wasting Time
Widdershins
Equilibrium
Snail at Home
Is it enough?
Seven Poisons
A Nexus of Roads
Silence with us
In the Face of Silence
Cycle of Burning
A Sky full of Joy
Cloistered Grove
Choices
Fly Butterfly Fly
Blooming in Adversity
Distant Endless Moors
Sweet Berries
A Dreaming
Once Met
Seas of Black Sky
Heaven’s Peaks
Together upon the Road
Written in the Stars
Stolen Wishes
Anew
Blooming to the Music
Sing
A New World
Song of Stone
Love is...
Water to the Soul
Eyes will Watch
Sometimes its nice
Explore
Change in the Air
Drowning in the Dark
The Song Plays On
Furnace of Creation
A Gemstone Found Upon A Hill
Have you?
Sometimes the Tree Dies
Hold my hand
A Simple Magic
Of Course
New Fallen Snow
Seedlings Sleeping
Wheel
Still Sleeping
Snowdrops
Enjoy the Spring
Cloying Beauty
Soft Silence
Mystery of the Rose
Just Be
When We were Here Last
Ship
Swift River
Broken
Painful Awakenings
The Story of a Butterfly
Such Beauty
Play On
Strawberry
Mother and Child
Strange Places Beyond
Black Suns
The Shallow Sea
A Foundation of Nothing
Awake in the Darkness
Endless Darkness
Absolutus Infinitus
Twilight to Dawn
The Burning Light
Ruins, Somewhere
Quotes from the Writer
Alpha
Beta
Gamma
Delta
Epsilon
Zeta
Eta
Theta
Iota
Kappa
Lambda
Mu
Nu
Xi
Omicron
The Journey
The Lonely Tree
Consider the Stars
First City
Only the Future Left
What makes a Monster?
A Secret Place
Not Far Off
#Fae#faerie#sidhe#otherfolk#the deep woods#quotes#tales#stories#places#gold-eyed beast#magic#beauty#secrets#lanterns#warnings#songs#poetry#crowns#courts#otherworld#masterpost#story masterpost
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