“Unalive” was funny when I was 14 and Deadpool said it in that one episode of Ultimate Spider-Man. It hasn’t been funny since

if someone is recording you for a tiktok without your consent i think you should be allowed to grab their phone and throw it as hard as you are physically able to

This whole normalization of recording people is scary as fuck now that I truly think about it.. like I could be doing the smallest embarassing thing and someone records it and bam my face is on tiktok and suddenly 350k people just recognize me.. that's.. fucking scary.

"what type of pretty are you? bunny, cat, fox, or deer?" i'm a sleep-deprived university student, hope this helps

People on tiktok when a video blows up: "oh my god I never expected this to happen, thank you all for watching it----*3 minute video explaining why they took the video instead of the part 2 everybody's been waiting for* oh and part 2 will be posted soon" *proceeds to drop of the face of the earth*

People on tumblr when their post goes somewhat viral: "fuck you guys why would you do this to me, I'm taking your reblog and reply privileges away"

...That's why Tiktok isn't the same...... Vine had the charm of home videos, improv and those little one-offs you have in the middle of other conversations...... Vine was slice-of-life humor. Tiktok is its gentrification because it got Instagramified.

I heard someone using the term "unalive" in the store yesterday.. dear teenager, you're not on tiktok, no one will censor you in the real world. JUST SAY KILL!

No one wants to admit TikTok’s biggest sin is that we have all become entirely too accepting of bad lip syncing. We allow half-asses lip syncs to become entirely more popular than they should be.

Tiktokers and content creators who show their face and/or body.......I'm not shaming they can do whatever they wanna do but I can criticize. Why is at least 50% of your content dependent on making yourself appear aesthetically or even audibly "appealing"? You're talking abt a serious issue but your voice is so soft spoken and clearly made to sound "nice" to the audience, your face and body are angled at a way to make you look "perfect", so it's no longer about the serious issue. Like yeah you're still talking about it but why do you make it so obvious you're also using it as an opportunity to make yourself seem "perfect". I have a specific tiktoker in mind iykyk

If u not on tiktok u gotta check out these tt recaps

This post pisses me the fuck off because it feels like a corruption of my favorite past times: going to extreme lengths to do random shit.

Last year in June I got an unexpected, last-minute day off that my roommate didn't have. With no other plans, I decided to drive two hours out to try Dave's Hot Chicken.

It was tasty, I got to catch up on some podcasts, it was a fun time! While there I took a few pictures because it looked neat, snagged a menu a some custom paper napkins as a souvenir to prove I really did this when I got home, and had a lovely time.

I didn't post anything on social media because a) this is the only one I use consistently and b) who cares? This wasn't something I did for clout. It was something I did because I like fried chicken.

Now I imagine there's a universe where someone else does something similar, only they drive further and they don't eat the fucking chicken. And why? Why are we trying to sell each other experiences that we don't participate in?

Why do we live for clout? Listen to me motherfucker and listen good, when you get to the gates of heaven and the Lord asks, "Did you partake in the pleasures I created for you on earth?" He will not be swayed by the pictures you took, the video you shot, or the followers you gained. He will look to see if your soul was enriched by eating tasty chicken and not harassing workers.

Atonal

Watched a documentary on Florence Foster Jenkins, last night, while waiting for the edibles to wear off. Almost pissed myself laughing.

It's crazy to look across the prism of History and to find what we'd today call a TikTok Thot staring back at you from the depths of 1943's Manhattan Boho culture, being absolutely convinced that her librettos were worth a damn when she couldn't hold a note to save her life.

The thing is, she was wealthy. She was rich enough to afford vinyl pressings of her own "performances" and thought that being able to book reknowned pianists on her own dime meant that the general public would appreciate her efforts.

Compare and contrast with today's lot of influencers who basically go "I can affect Vocal Fry and scat along a beat, which obviously means I'm Singer Material! Watch out, TikTok!"

Like - kid. I know, you look like a rejuvenated Melissa Etheridge with curlier hair and makeup so heavy it looks like it adds a pound on a scale, but you are no singer.

Reddits mods are pissed that the CEO is getting paid 190m a year while they cull CSA and hate speech for free. Instagrams AI is mistakenly banning users for spam when they comment on friends pictures. Twitter is a hate filled bot farm run by an egomaniac. Facebook is a boomer graveyard filled with AI conspiracy theories radicalizing granola moms and your grandad. Tumblrs CEO is breaking data privacy laws on a targeted harassment campaign. Tiktok is making sexism woke and trendy again. 2024 is the year social media sites implode and take us all out with them.

Thinking about the time I lost a game of Overwatch and I was so mad about it that I genuinely considered getting into shit with the other team in chat and then realized that it was a colossal waste of my living breathing Human Time and uninstalled Overwatch instead because it was only making me angry.

And then thought about the OTHER time when I was on TikTok and realized I was Not Enjoying Myself and was, in fact, seeing so many sad videos and fake influencer ads that I felt Truly Despondent and then just…Deleted it.

Imo I want my social media /general media experience to be a pleasant break from real world and I get to decide what I get to cull to make that a reality for myself. I highly reccomended it! Life has improved considerably!

The reason Goncharov was fun and worked well is because Tumblr didn’t plan for it, we just “yes and” it, everyone went with it and added to it with no planning while TikTok people with Zepotha are trying to recreate that by deciding to start a trend and tell people this movie existed, there isn’t even much more than “you look like this character” and sometimes people saying it was actually them.