#they're also probably demi-aspec | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

random-human-being2311 · 5 hours

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WARNING: aroace whovian rant incoming

the feeling of betrayal when you leave your tight-knit close friendship group and realise that some of your friends firmly believe that the doctor is completely allo and completely dismiss your aroace headcanons as being completely unfounded

and when you, knowing all the coding and implications across decades of the show and also the numerous actors and writers for the show who have said that they write/portray the doctor as asexual (usually in the way people who don't know much about aspecs use the term "asexual" when they mean "aroace") and also it literally recently apparently being confirmed in big finish and the ninth doctor saving the day with the power of aromanticism in an audio drama (correct me if I misinterpreted that, I don't listen to big finish so know this from clips of it showing up on my tumblr dash) and it's such a widespread belief around the whole fandom that it's basically canon and you say "well, they're officially aroace TO ME"

only for this fucking normie who can't bear to watch any eras of the show where the doctor isn't young and handsome and played by david tennant so has only seen the eras of 10th and a little 11th and thinks all classic who is rubbish and can't understand why 12th is your favourite incarnation and whose favourite episode is so predictably Blink (like bestie do you have ANY originality to your Doctor Who takes????) to be like "ummm actually that's not what official means. It's literally confirmed nowhere and is just your silly headcanon. I don't think they're aroace at all, actually. Demisexual AT THE VERY MOST." By her tone and everything I could also tell her unspoken words of "you silly little child with your silly childish headcanons, don't you know anything? how on earth could you be so stupid as to see this character as aroace??" like bitch (/affectionate) stfu it's demi at the very LEAST. you really think this dude is 100% alloromantic and probably allosexual, only AT THE VERY MOST demisexual??? Despite all the heavy aspec coding they've had for literally half a century or so???

DISCLAIMER: you can headcanon a character as anything you fucking want to. I'm not dictating what people should headcanon the Doctor as, I'm just venting that I'm annoyed at my friend for being such a dismissive bitch about it, given the fact that this character and this identity, which is horrifically underrepresented as it is, actually mean a lot to me, as an aroace whovian.

the absolute MINIMUM headcanon I will accept as fitting close enough to my view of this character is alloro demisexual. I mean, my actual headcanon is demiro-aroflux ace, ranging from capital A Aroace in quite a few incarnations (e.g. majority of the classic ones) to demiromantic ace at the very far allo end (e.g. the ones with canon romantic relationships). But this character is wayyyyyyy too aspec-coded for me to happily smile and accept them being 100% allo without at least a skeptical "really?" eyebrow raise.

sorry bestie I love you and all but let's be serious: whose opinion about this character has more weight and solid reasoning behind it; the very very casual fan who has only seen a handful of seasons and isn't even bothering to watch the new season as it's being broadcast or the extremely dedicated nerdy whovian who has been absolutely fucking obsessed with this show for half a dozen years, has seen episodes from ALL the main incarnations, has every single wallpaper on every device they own being doctor who related, everyone knows them as "the one who really likes doctor who", warns everyone to not let them start talking about doctor who because they'd literally never stop, has a lot of their core morals and beliefs (e.g. extreme pacifism) directly due to doctor who, has a huge shelf in their bedroom that's full to the brim with doctor who stuff and a large section of wall dedicated to the show filled with loads of doctor who fanart they have made, has seen dozens of episodes so many times that they can recall majority of their dialogue from memory, even fucking first discovered the term "asexual" BECAUSE of this show's fandom talking about how much they headcanon this character as asexual (I LITERALLY OWE ME KNOWING WHAT 'AROACE' MEANS AND DISCOVERING MY AROACE IDENTITY TO DOCTOR WHO, SPECIFICALLY PEOPLE SAYING THAT THEY THINK THE DOCTOR IS ACE. CANNOT MAKE THIS SHIT UP, THAT'S THE ACTUAL WAY I FIRST LEARNED ABOUT ASPECS), I could go on and on about more of the ways that doctor who has permanently infiltrated my brain chemistry but you get the idea

like, which of those two people's interpretation of a character would you trust more???

and when I pulled up loads of aroace doctor fanart and such to spite her because I was annoyed as fuck of how dismissive she was being and to show how common a headcanon this to help prove my point that it's basically defacto canon was she was like "umm actually just because it's a reasonably popular headcanon doesn't mean it's real" umm yeah but it also doesn't mean you have to be so goddamn rude about this thing that means a lot to me.

you know, dismissing my interpretation of my Favourite Character In Anything Ever Full Stop, who directly helped me discover my aroace identity due to being really aroace-coded, from My Favourite Show Ever that's literally my capital S and I Special Interest. yeah that might just be a fucking reasonable deal to me, thanks. not life and death or anything obviously, but it actually means a decent lot to me and is that so hard to understand???

moral of story: the Doctor being aroace is still official TO ME.

because now more than ever I realised that I don't have to give a fuck about other people's headcanons because they don't mean shit about my own and don't do anything at all to disprove my own.

The Doctor is aroace, or at the very least aroacespec, TO ME, and anyone who's annoyed by me saying that probably won't find my blog very interesting, since vast majority of it is posts about Doctor Who and posts about being Aroace and posts about both at once.

Holy fuck I'm feeling so much better now I've got that off my chest.

#doctor who #aroace #headcanon #headcanons #aro #ace #asexuality #asexual #aromantic #the doctor #that one's ramblings #<- I've been forgetting to use that tag a lot recently but this one deserves it more than most xD

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batmanfruitloops · 7 months

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Music Meister and Polka-dot Man seem like such a cute couple, so I must ask: what type of dynamic do they have? As in, is it the classic "extrovert and their introvert" trope? Or maybe they're both extroverted weirdos? I'm so curious to learn more about what Darius and Abner are like as boyfriends!

I'm so glad you asked, I've been meaning to explain those lovely goobers of mine!

"Extrovert and their introvert" is a pretty good description of how those two are, Darius being the extrovert and Abner being the introvert, although if Abner hadn't been stuck in a lab for years, he'd probably be more outgoing.

ALSO,

Because I haven't posted about Darius or Abner's backstories as of yet, I will be explaining as much as is necessary to fully understand their relationship dynamic, as well as a lot of things I like about them. So this is going to be very long and have lots of pictures (apologies that it took so long because of that)

Darius History

To start, Darius is gay (Although I suppose that's a given) and Abner is demi. Darius was aware of this from a pretty young age, and so went through the ups and downs of that over the years. Abner wouldn't know how he felt on the romantic to aspec end of the spectrum until much later. Given Abner has spent half of his life in a lab since the age of 12, and the raucous living environment he had before, developing feelings for anyone was the last thing on his mind. Living with Darius for a while and then being presented with romantic feelings, Abner would be able to think about what he'd really want out of a relationship, and if he'd like that with Darius, and he does.

Darius is an only child of Ronald and Dalia Chapel, one of the elite families of Gotham. His relationship with his parents was fine when he was very young, but when they found out that he had powers, that changed. It was a day like any other, really. Darius was playing with his cousin, Mikey. They were just playing around and Darius was singing at the top of his lungs. This was also a common behavior for him, as it was one of his favorite things. Without really thinking about it, Darius told Mikey to do whatever he said. Mikey did it all with a blank expression. Darius just thought he was playing along, so he brought his parents to show them. They were able to tell that he wasn't just choosing to listen. Terrified, they yelled for Darius to stop. He did, startled by their sudden frustration. Mikey snapped out of it, greeting his aunt and uncle. Because of this, Darius' uncle, Kevin, is also aware of his powers, although Dalia (who's Kevin's older sister) made him swear to never bring it up. Despite this, he's one of the few people to always be supportive of Darius in every part of himself.

Darius' parents tried to discourage him from doing anything musically. They didn't want anything to happen and affect their family. But Darius loved music and singing. There was just no way he was going to give that up in its entirety. So he still joined choir in school, much to his parents' dismay. He did well. He was his teacher's favorite: he could sight-read pretty much anything, he could play the piano as accompaniment during their lessons and performances, help others with their parts, as well as fit into any octave section, depending on who needed it most. Darius was bullied for this, but he brushed it off. It hurt, but he enjoyed what he did, and he knew he was good at it.

Among Darius' bullies, there were a main few who harassed him more than others, and physically instead of just words at times. These boys had another friend who defended Darius, telling them to leave him alone and helping him up off the ground. Darius fell for that boy, and he fell hard. He felt his heart flutter any time he saw him, and grinned whenever they touched.

Darius wanted to confess. He knew it might not go well, but he felt that even if the boy didn't feel the same way, he'd turn Darius down politely, and that would be it. Unfortunately, when Darius actually did confess to him in a secluded area of the school, his face contorted in disgust, and he turned Darius down not so politely. Still, Darius accepted that response and moved on. The boy, however, decided to start bullying Darius along with the others. Darius' sexuality became another thing to bully him for.

Besides that, the rest of Darius' school life was uneventful. Just homework, concerts, and a desire to belong. Right after he graduated, he got his ear pierced, and that little thing opened the floodgates for his parents to berate him again, telling him to get over himself so he'd be suitable to carry on the Chapel name. He stood his ground and soon moved out, tired of the toxic environment.

Darius is able to make friends after this, one of which he opens a club with called "Euphony Lounge". I'll have to get into that in a post of its own, but Darius co-owns and is the DJ there.

Darius still didn't have much luck dating. Not every experience was bad, but nobody was ever as serious as he was. His last "partner" before becoming the Music Meister was a guy named Corbin. Again, he'll get his own post eventually, but there's a reason I put partner in parentheses. He left Darius very drained, and with Darius also wanting a use for his powers, he threw his passions into becoming the Music Meister.

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Abner History

Abner comes from a family of 9. This includes his parents and 6 siblings. His mother was an Iranian immigrant named Aviva Fazel, his father a born Gothamite David Krill. (Family order reference) His father was very controlling of his mother. She couldn't go out, couldn't talk to people or even neighbors, just had to take care of the house, kids, and whatever else he wanted. So Aviva did her best to appease his demands. Abner, being the second oldest, did his best to help around the house along with his other siblings. School was a welcome place to blend in because coming home meant going back to his father. Abner had heard his father yell and hit his mother on many occasions, threatening to throw them all out, but his mother never stopped him. That was until his father started yelling about Jamie and was going to hit him. Aviva wouldn't stand to have her children treated like that. Finally, David completely lost his temper, literally kicking Aviva and his kids out. And then they had nothing but each other.

Desperate to give her kids a better life, Aviva went from place to place, trying to find a job. During this time, Davin, Abner, and Chaya took the most care of the younger 4. They were too young to really understand what was happening, but they knew that something was wrong. A week turned into a month, then a month and a half. Aviva was able to pick up odd jobs here and there, but nothing she could keep. She could see her children starting to wither away, and it broke her heart.

Out of nowhere, Aviva spotted some fliers Stating that anyone willing to have a virus tested on them would have their living means provided for them into the foreseeable future. It sounded too good to be true, but she had to check. The flier was legitimate, and Aviva and her children were hurriedly ushered into an office to sign some documents.

The doctors and other staff all seemed fine at first. They treated the kids very nicely, getting them all cleaned up and fed. But once they were injected with the virus, their niceness took on an eerie presence. Each of them reacted differently, the spots starting small, and they felt fine. But not long after, the negative side effects started to appear. Again, saving that part for later, but I can tell you that Abner was the only one to end up surviving with the virus.

Abner hated it there. The silence filled only with the buzz of lights and passing footsteps, the dirty off-white walls, the doctors who only said that they cared. And they made him wear hand cuffs and a suppressor to keep his spots from getting out of hand until they needed him.

It was extremely uncomfortable, as well as a constant reminder of the condition he was in. Star labs' main concern is turning and/or taking meta-humans to become soldiers to fight wars instead of other humans as well as whatever intense or underhanded tasks, thanks to Waller.

Among these tasks, Waller wanted Abner to become one of her best soldiers, ready to kill and use any force necessary. But Abner is against killing, the idea terrifies him. He has no desire to be a violent person and refused despite the multitude of methods they tried using to change that. So they still deployed him for dirty government missions. So although he isn't wearing a suppressor and cuffs on missions, he's still equipped with a suicide collar and watched.

One such method they tried using on Abner was isolation: just enough to break him, but not enough to permanently take him out of commission. For many years, that was effective. Abner, stuck all by himself, left only to his thoughts. The many many thoughts of his family, outliving them, the neverending nightmare of his current situation.....the idea of dying didn't sound so bad anymore. But by the time he's 24, his current age, those isolated moments just turned to a burning rage and a plot to leave.

He puts this plot into effect during a mission and is able to get away. Again, I'll leave that moment for a different post, it's pretty important.

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First Meeting

Oh boy, let's talk about how these two met. It was not actually as rogues, though they did know of each other. They met in a meet-cute situation not too long after Abner finally escaped from the lab and was traveling around. The Gotham subway system, to be exact. Darius was just getting to and from shopping before noticing just how uncomfortable Abner looked, standing stiff with his hands in his pockets, hood pulled tightly, and a medical mask on. Then that lead to noticing that Abner had handsome eyes, and continuing to glance out of the corner of his eye. Due to the subway bumping around, Abner's hood slips momentarily, and Darius is able to see a few spots. "Oh, I know who you are," an unspoken thought. They meet eyes in that moment, Darius from curiosity and Abner fear. The shuttle grinds to a halt, and Abner books it out of there, Darius close behind. He's never actually met another meta-human before, this was his perfect chance! Unfortunately, it comes across as creepy and once Abner is cornered, he pulls a buzz saw spot out in a panic, ready to use it if Darius doesn't run off. This finally makes Darius realize just how this scenario reads, and he tries to explain and ask if Abner is okay. They chat in that alley briefly before Darius offers Abner to stay in his house until he finds a better means for himself to live. Abner would still be skeptical at this point, but Darius hasn't made any moves to hurt him (he does disclose that he's the Music Meister, btw) and Abner has the ability to stop him if he needs to. So he follows him home. Darius would explain where things were and let him know that he isn't obligated to offer anything to stay, or even interact with him. This would be pretty surprising to Abner, people don't just do things without a motive.

Abner is honestly very grateful to have a place to hide and some company. The idea of being alone any longer would be unbearable. So Abner stays pretty close to Darius, and they get to know each other as they open up. It helps that Darius is so chatty, since it makes Abner much more comfortable.

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Had they met as rogues instead, it wouldn't be too different? It mostly crossed my mind purely out of curiosity, but it's cute to me that Darius would still fall for Abner and try very hard to "rizz him up" before Abner went from flustered and distraught (from having to return to the lab, he wouldn't want to acknowledge anything at first, that could end up hurting both of them, and also, Abner still wouldn't understand how he was feeling at first) to wanting to run away with him. (I know, I can be extremely mushy)

It was a bit awkward for the first while, but Darius did a lot to make it comfortable for Abner and not feel like a stranger just passing through.

Darius originally offered Abner his room and he'd be sleeping on the couch, but Abner wasn't keen on the idea of being alone again, so he asked if they could both just be in his room. Darius understood that sentiment, so he obliged. A bit awkward for Darius (in a nervous context, not that he'd dislike the idea. He's only ever slept in the same bed as past partners), but Abner was used to sleeping with his mom and siblings before, so it's much more comfortable for him to share the proximity. Along with that, Darius also plays music on a low volume and keeps lava lamps on while he sleeps, which adds to an atmosphere that's calming. It's the opposite of the lab in every way,

Darius really did try not to fall for Abner, despite his initial physical attraction. He had just had a bad experience months prior with Corbin, and he wanted to prove to himself that he could be emotionally independent. Abner had also been in a situation that made Darius feel like he'd be unsure if he felt the same, or worse, that he'd feel obligated to reciprocate because Darius was providing him amenities. But the more Abner became comfortable with him, the harder it got.

Abner was very kind and caring, and very good at listening. He'd opened up about his past and let Darius do the same, so that only made them closer. Abner enjoyed how Darius liked to show him new things, and now enthusiastic he was about it. Abner treated Darius a lot like his siblings, it's what he'd best understand; he'd have a hard time placing how it felt different, but he'd just assume it was because they weren't actually blood related.

That said, Darius would reach a point where he'd confess, while being careful about it. He wouldn't want to make Abner uncomfortable, but it was affecting Darius on a daily basis.

Abner had to think about it for a few days, but he ultimately decided that he'd like to try and see how things worked out with Darius.

Abner likes to cook, but it would have been over a decade since he last got to. So he wouldn't have much confidence doing so, especially since he'd be recreating his mother's recipes based on his memories, but he'd enjoy himself a lot. Darius doesn't know how to cook, so it's helpful to let both of them eat better as well.

Darius is a hopeless romantic. He's just so happy to be dating Abner in the first place, and he has a lot of silly habits. Sometimes he'll just blush and giggle to himself if he catches Abner staring. He did this before they were dating too, but it's not something that ever stops happening. When he finds himself especially flustered, he'll tuck his hair behind his ear. Not the long side, mind you, but the shorter one. So there's not really any hair to tuck, it's just the motion, and Abner finds that very cute.

Abner is also pretty happy to just be dating Darius, although he shows it more through contentment. He's also a bit more aloof about giving affection. Not because he doesn't want to be affectionate, he's just so used to being by himself and left to his own thoughts that his actions can seem out of nowhere. To give an example for the sake of explanation, let's say the two were on an outing and Darius was being chatty the whole time (because of course he would be). Abner would feel the progressing want to kiss him, so the actual event of said kiss wouldn't be in reaction to any particular thing Darius said or where they were.

Euphony Lounge is a club that Darius made with his closest friend at the time, Micah. They wanted a club that anyone could feel welcome at, as well as have it decorated with lots of inspiration to their favorite music artists throughout the years, I'll get to it in it's own post eventually.

Darius will be working as the DJ most nights. Otherwise, he'll be out causing forgivable mischief as the Music Meister. He's so happy seeing other people enjoying music as well as themselves, and it's the perfect place for that.

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Spot issues

There's so much I could go into depth about how Abner's spots and the virus work, but I'll save the bulk of that for another post. What's most important is that Abner's spots can make him feel very sick if his body reaches the limit of how many spots it can handle at once before they need to be purged.

He'll start to get a bad migraine, with spotty vision and his mouth with taste like stomach acid, throat dry, and sticking to itself. Nausea sets in as well, making moving at all uncomfortable. He'd be more aware of every spot on his body than usual, and so he'd want them gone. Unfortunately, he still can't purge them just anywhere. If he were to throw them all up in the toilet, it would be destroyed by the buzz saws and black holes, so he has to be able to find a secluded area to safely get rid of them all. Darius does his best to comfort Abner until these bouts are over, continuing to help as purging leaves him very drained.

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Dating

Darius likes to sing in the shower and continues to do so while getting ready for the day. Abner finds this very amusing and will just listen to and watch him. Although it still caught both of them by surprise the first time it happened living together.

Abner had on cuffs and a suppressor for a majority of his life before escaping. Because of this, he gets extremely anxious when his wrists or neck are touched. Add any pressure to that, and he'll pull away. Darius is understanding of this and does his best to avoid touching them. Pretty much anywhere else is fine for him. Places that are more commonly sensitive, he'd be fine with, like your back, hips, thighs, that kind of thing. So he becomes a bit frustrated at himself about it. It makes total sense, it's going to take time, and it will probably only ever be Darius who'll touch him like that, but that's part of why he's frustrated. He trusts Darius, there's no way that man will ever hurt him, yet the anxiety is still there. But they work through it over time. Abner having patience in himself is very important. And Darius is just as patient and sweet. Perhaps I'm beating this point into the ground, but it's very important to me, given I've had a similar situation before.

Darius is very much on the opposite end. He likes all kinds of touch, anywhere, anytime. He's a very physically affectionate person, so his friends receive that too (given they aren't touch averse, of course). This is a helpful fact for when they first start dating, as it gives Abner the ability to lead. Darius is content just knowing Abner feels the same way, but he's very happy that Abner wants to be touchy as well.

Along with that, Darius is 6' 1" and Abner is 6', so they're practically the same height. If not for Darius styling his hair so big, and wearing platforms to go out, you probably couldn't be sure who was actually taller. Also a little fun fact that goes along with that, in 4" platforms Darius would be the same height as Jo, 6' 5", although his Music Meister costume has one of the few pairs of shoes he owns that have a normal sole.

Abner isn't particularly fond of going out. He wants to experience new things for himself, but the idea of his identity being found out and having to return to the lab is his worst fear. However, it's more comfortable when he goes out with Darius. Darius is very good at keeping his attention or re-directing it to something else. A firm hand hold can never go wrong either. Plus it's not fair to think that Abner would never be able to go out because of something someone else is responsible for.

Still, they mostly go out to the Euphony Lounge and that's a safe place to be. It's stimulating for Abner without being too much in the DJ booth, and Darius is able to enjoy a job he really likes. Sometimes they'll even dance together up there, just getting lost in the music and each other's presence.

I think that's everything I have at the moment, ha ha, I love these two,

- Sarsee

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olivermorningstar · 4 months

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well, I was gonna keep all of them to myself about LGBTQ headcannon for ikevamp, but I changed my mind. (Some of this is just what I experienced and projected onto them so bare with me)

Issac is between demi and greyaroace. I like to think he flucates between them.

Charles is fucking poly and pan as shit. Probably even gender fluid or anything similar to it. I just imagine him being the embodiment of not giving fucks.

Arthur is vari-oriented (orientations don't align). Bisexual, but heteromantic. Or Aroapec and Mspec. I also think it changes over time, but the only thing constant is his attraction to women and for the longest time he just assumes he's confused.

Theo is definitely Demiaroace.

Jean is transmasc and a demi-man. I like to imagine he's both an agender and a man. Ace,but he switches between sex positive to sex replused a lot.

Dazai is bi... Another member of not giving a fuck

Vincent is demiaroace, but also platonicromantic (has a hard time telling between platonic and romantic attraction).

Napoleon is FUCKING bi and demi.

While Comte and Leo are poly, it takes a while for them to set up relationships so most often they're fob/ chill ex. Leo is Greyroace and leans towards men (maybe also cupio for women so vari-oriented hey). Comte is pan

Vlad is... Either unlabeled or pan. Same with Faust, they peg me the type to not really care at all.

Seb is another bi man, but I do think he leans towards guys.

Mozart is either aspec (probably more aro-spec),but very much also pan.

William is Greyroace

Galileo is romance averse-neutral Greyroace (could also be described as dreadromantic even). like Jean it fluctuates.

Idk about drake. Maybe pan.

Wow! This is very in depth! I like a lot of what I see though!

I do like how many Just Are because that's about how I view my sexuality as well at this point. While I know my gender situation is genderfluid, it makes my attraction to others all over the place. My partner is nonbinary, but prefers to present fem, so we just look like a lesbian couple and like it, but also some guys good? There are just attractive people out there.

I'm straying from the point, the point is I like the level of thought back here! Warms my heart to see so many interesting headcanons!

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nonuggetshere · 1 year

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If Ina gets a romantic partner I also want them to be a badass (because badasses are cool) but it absolutely would not work out until The Radiance is dealt with

-💚

Honestly yeah, Inanis wouldn't even think about pursuing anything romantic or even focusing on their own life until Radiance is dealt with, they'd find any romantic pursuers an annoyance at best.

That and they probably wouldn't even realise that it's a possibility now that they're free to be their own person. Partly because I imagine them as demi/generally aspec, but mostly because all their life they were treated like an object and it wouldn't have been a possibility for them at all, so the idea that oh shit I could try dating people now never even crossed their mind. And they also had bigger problems at hand all of the time (first recovering post-sealing, then trying to stop the Radiance and save young PV).

If they ever end up getting with somebody, it'd be far off into the future. Hope and Hornet would be in their late teens at the very least possibly adults. It wouldn't be something they actively seek out either, they're perfectly content staying single and lead a perfectly fulfilling life without it.

Maybe if Pale King had made them his heir they would have been more inclined to actually actively pursue somebody, as they'd feel that was part of their responsibility as a ruler (even if PK would never expect it of them). But I honestly feel that title would either go to Little Hope or Hornet. Even if he did ask them they'd probably decline; they already had to deal with the crushing responsibility of being the Pure Vessel and then having to deal with the entire time travel bullshit, they've dealt with enough of responsibility for a lifetime, they'd just like to rest, thank you very much. So they wouldn't be actually inclined to find somebody, and if they do it'd most likely be somebody they're already incredibly close to.

#asks #thylacines can talk #6th knight au #i went wildly off topic for a hot second there #i hope its comprehensible its like 4 am here

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never-forget-official · 1 year

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dunno if I’m reading the characters wrong, but did you intend for Sans or MC to be aspec? (just said aspec to include arospec and acespec since I don’t know which would be more appropriate to use for this ask) Just asking because I can relate to both of them and their experiences with romance because I’m an aroace who is all too confused

I love these two goobers <333

may or may not reveal who I am off anon cuz I didn’t want to come off as bad at reading characters and their experiences.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAFDJKGDFFJHDGFHJGDSHJGSDJDH

i'm aspec myself (specifically demi) so when it comes to MC i probably project that onto her but it's not intentional LMBOOOOO, i didn't really intend for her to come across as aspec but. jshgjhghjs it's also okay to see her as such!!! (there's just backstory reasons she's inept at romance or just, sometimes any social interaction in general fdhghjdgdfjhdgjh but even then i can see her being aspec too if that, makes sense idk)

and i don't think i've mentioned it specifically before but, i did write Sans with the intention of him being on the ace spectrum. i like the headcanon that all monsters are demi but it's, also not a concrete headcanon my opinion constantly fluctuates PFFFFT but. i did intend to write Sans as demiromantic asexual specifically, if!!! that makes any sense!!!!

basically all in all you're technically totally right for reading them as that hjdgsjhdgsjdhgsdhj!!! but also there's no "correct" way to read characters or writing i think, so even if you didn't get my intentions or anything like that it's all good!!!!

hghghgghhg i love them toooo they're just <333333 aghhhhhhhhhhh,,,

SHOW YOURSELF ANON (i'm kidding i'm kidding you don't have to HJGDSEHJGSHJHAHHA)

(also thanks for this question, i'm glad to answer it cause i realized i never talked about this before??? dshjgdhjsgjshgjsh >:OO)

#asks #anon #Never Forget series

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the-asexuality-blog · 2 years

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So I've been thinking about the lack odmf representation of aspec people in media and how a lot of the community seem to project aspec-ness onto non-confirmed aspec characters.

I don't understand it. Like if the character isn't said to be this then why try and make them that way?

I do have a theory on my difference in opinion. I am black. When I look at a character who is decidedly not black me projecting ain't bringing the possibility of a magic race change. If I want to see people who look like me in my media I have to actively seek it out or accept my lack of representation.

It feels the overwhelming majority of the queer community online is white. White characters are everywhere. You would be hard pressed to find 3 shows with no white people. White characters have (what feels like) all the representation you could ask for. Want a gay romance show? Heartstopper. Want a strong female MC in a book? The entire YA genre. Hell it seems the few disabled characters are all white. So it seems to me that when white people see that weird lack of "this is not me" they bend media to fit them.

Let me be clear I don't find anything wrong with that. If you wanna headcannon a character to be aro or demi or whatever you do you. It's just not something I do or understand.

This sorta rant could probably be worded better so if anythings unclear you can tell me! I just want to share my thoughts on this because it's been bugging me and also interests me. The ways race and ethnicity affect how we interact with media and how a lack of representation impacts a common culture despite the diversity you could find if you look.

As I see it, headcanoning any given character as ace or aro is just as valid as headcanoning them as any other orientation regardless of how they're presented in canon. Look at Phil Coulson and Clint Barton, for example--Clint is canonically married with children and Coulson supposedly has a musician girlfriend, but that hasn't stopped people shipping them based on a single radio conversation in one movie ten years ago.

You're absolutely right that there is far too little representation of non-white minorities, and I agree that we need more. If you have any media recs that will help fill that gap, I'll be happy to boost them. I have shared posts about Black, Brown, Indigenous aces and aros, but as a (mostly) white person, I want to avoid speaking over voices like yours and amplify them instead. But, yeah, the "I am uncomfortable when we are not about me?" bird definitely comes into play in the white community, whether queer or straight.

#intersectionality #answered

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scoundrels-in-love · 1 year

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Hi, my name's Rainy short from SadRain, but I also go by Imber as per my AO3.

I'm one of those she/theys aroaces and I use the aspec government issued wand of Turns Characters Demi very liberally. If you see them in my fic, yeah, they're probably demisexual/demiromantic.

English isn't my native language but I've been writing in it for some 17 out of my almost 30 years at this rate, so I won't be apologizing. Same as for whatever ungodly mess of a blog you've stumbled into at the point of reading this. My house, my hoarder mess with missing articles everywhere. If you feel like leaving a tip for whatever reason, you can find my Ko-fi here, but currently I'd appreciate it even more if you helped out my friend who is in a tight situation.

Favorite color's purple & black, it shows, hit me up to scream about anything like d&d, Trigun, kdramas, languages, music, visual novels, glassblowing & pottery, Braime, photography and basically anything else, any time.

#rainy rambles #about me #I'm real fuckin' bad at self introduction #also eyyy public tumblr announcement about my pronouns I guess

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rgbfall · 2 years

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Realised I haven't put my lgbt ninjago headcanons on my tumblr so! Here they are!

Kai

Bi with no preference

I also like aro Kai hcs but idk how to fit that into my hcs? Maybe he's aspec? Maybe he's just a really flirty aro? Not sure

Trans demiboy! Uses he/she/they but also doesn't care so doesn't tell people that unless they ask

Cole

He's tulipian! Omni gay and aspec!

Not sure where he is on the a-spectrum, maybe demi?, but he's romance and sex favorable

Also a bear gay. That's pretty obvious tbh

Just a cis/binary guy. He/him

Either Lou is gay and so Cole knew early on or Lou is homophobic and so for ages Cole didn't know what lgbtqa+ was beyond gay and lesbian so. Thought he was straight for ages until the other ninja came out too

Jay

Pan! He just has those vibes

Polyamarous as well bc I like polyninja too much (ofc all of them are polyam-spec but Jay uses it as like. A proper descriptor where the others don't)

Twink

Trans of gender because Look At Him. He/him but doesn't mind they/them.

I haven't thought of any specific ones, but he strikes me as someone who'd use neos. So. He's trying those out I guess

Zane

Loveless aroace. A lot of aro pride. Will still date though because I'm Like That too

Nonbinary. Have you seen him. Genderfluid and very gnc. Can and will wear heels because they're a queen

Sapphoboy and achilleagirl (WLW/MLM). Not sure if it's a gaybian/uses lesbian and turian/gay? Maybe just pan/ply though

He/she/they/it. Pronoun preference fluctuates, but she's pretty much only with anything anytime

Nya

Bi because of course she is. Female preference

Maybe bi lesbian? She has very strong bi vibes but she also has massive lesbian energy. So maybe both

Jaya was just MLM/WLW solidarity there is no romance there

Also aro(spec?)

Trans of gender obv

She/her

Lloyd

Gay n aroace.

Trans nonbinary (FTNB) gets very dysphoric w/ fem stuff

He/they. Also haven't decided on any neos but those too

Xenic somehow. Probably xenogenders that are like,, excited, playful, wisp-like genders

Pixal

Nonbinary ICON. Demigirl I think

Sapphic somehow? She likes Women

She/they

Bonus:

Skylor

Genderfluid lesboy. You can fight me on the lesboy thing I'm right

He/she

A very spiteful/angry queer person (i.e. literally calls himself a lesboy out of SPITE)

#i like all of the headcanons i see #so i use a lot of them #but some things you cannot sway me from #eg loveless/gaybian zane and lesboy skylor #anyway yes i projected some stuff on them #because of course i did #||#fall speaks #ninjago #mogai

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zukkaoru · 3 years

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Demiro Joe headcanons?

- it takes him until well into adulthood to figure out that romantic attraction and sexual attraction are not the same thing

- he always just assumed that they always came together, which is why he doesn't think twice about the fact that he feels differently about kaoru than he has for any of the people he's dated

- kaoru is basically the only person kojiro has ever actually been romantically attracted to, because apart from him and adam, kojiro hasn't really gotten close enough to people for that attraction to form. and he was too busy being jealous to develop feelings for adam.

- for years, he writes it off as the fact that kaoru is his best friend

- it's actually langa who introduces him to the split attraction model! they're talking in sia la luce one evening and langa mentions that he's ace and miya is like ??? but you're dating reki??

- langa explains that just because he doesn't experience sexual attraction doesn't mean he can't experience romantic attraction, and that he identifies as gay and ace, but the gay part really just describes his romantic orientation

- and then he adds on that he also identifies as demiromantic, which means he won't develop romantic feelings for anyone if there isn't a friendship built up first

- something langa said sparked kojiro's interest, so he does some looking into the different aspec identities, and wow-- there's a lot more than he'd expected

- that leads to him investigating the different types of attraction (mainly sexual vs. romantic) and he slowly starts to piece together that he.. wasn't really romantically attracted to any of his previous partners. which explains why the relationships never went anywhere

- he's always been worried bc flirting and leaving comes more natural than the flirting actually developing into a relationship, and he feels so bad about it because he's not actively trying to hurt people, but sometimes they're interested in romance and everything in him just says RUN. so he does

- (or he stays and it ends up being massively uncomfortable for both of them.)

- so he thinks, maybe he's aromantic and bisexual? maybe he just... doesn't experience romantic attraction?

- but there's still something about some of the descriptions of romantic attraction he's read that feels familiar?

- it takes him longer than he'd like to admit for him to realize that it's because he's romantically attracted to kaoru. those feelings have been there so long that they've become second nature. he wasn't expecting a realization of feelings that have been there for the past decade

- so he's not aromantic, but he's probably on the aromantic spectrum somewhere, which sets him back to researching the different labels again

- in the end, he settles on demiromantic because he's sure the friendship he and kaoru built up had to be there before the feelings for kaoru developed, and because it's the one that feels most right. now that he has some idea what romantic attraction is, he can't imagine feeling it for anyone he doesn't already have a relationship built up with.

- bonus: he comes out as demiromantic to kaoru after they get together and says that it was actually bc of langa that he figured it out, and kaoru laughs because that same discussion of langa being ace + demi led to kaoru figuring out he's demisexual

#anon my beloved thank you so much for this #i have Many Thoughts about demiro joe and i am very very happy someone wanted to hear them sjfgdkhj #demiromantic joe #kojiro nanjo #nanjo kojiro #matchablossom #demisexual cherry #sk8 #asks #anon asks

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aroaceconfessions · 3 years

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cw: q word

Sometimes, I wonder if the LGBT community would rather remain a community of people who are attracted to the same-sex/gender, instead of a community composed of people who are Not Straight. From what I've seen, most tend to place emphasis on the homo type of attraction — which isn't a bad thing especially if that's the part of their identity that they identify with the most, but there are times when it's to the point that it's as if LGBT = gay or queer = homosexual, instead of, you know, one or more of the wide array of identities that the rainbow flag is supposed to cover. As an aro/ace who prefers to lurk in the spaces I am in, I feel that homo attraction is somehow more important than others. Say, an alloace or an alloaro will have more people focus on the allo part and either ignore or completely disregard the aspec part of their identity. And God forbid if they're demi/the allo part is hetero, and then they're probably 'just a straight person trying to invade our spaces'.

Because if they want the community to be exclusive, then I guess I want people to just say so? Rather than the erasure or invalidation of other queer identities because we've never been oppressed, etc. which, speaking of, kinda reminds me of the difference between outright abuse and neglect? One is more obvious and leaves both internal and more apparent external scars, while the other is more internal, but both can muck up a person who experiences them either way? But also, why are we using suffering as a point of validation rather than our identities as queer people?

I don't know...

I want to be wrong and I'm scared. I'd rather not have the community eventually split because that defeats the goal of solidarity that queer people are supposed to pursue.

P.S. I'm sorry this was long, for using the binary sex and gender I think (?) system, and if this offends someone. And whether or not this gets posted, thanks for reading it.

#aroace #aromantic #asexual

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alderjayne · 3 years

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isaac? :3c

HIM HIMHIM

Sexuality Headcanon: you see he's already canonly gay and canonly demiace so there's only so much to hc, saving how for he fits on the ace spectrum, which kai mentioned a while ago to someone was fine to mess with a tad bcause trying to identify where exactly on the aspec you fall is finicky and difficult to pinpoint anyways. ACTUALLY now that I think about it I do pretty often consider him... probably demi-aro as well, but also simply more likely to have romantic attraction to someone than sexual once they meet the qualifications for either. that's just the vibe in my head tho this is not upset by seeing different portrayals about it at all. and also if he's at a point where/if he manages to like multiple people. poly. obtaining this however assumes that he not only has the emotional comprehension, initiative, and articulation to establish a relationship with one person, but in fact 2+ persons. he can't do that. probably they'd have to come to this conclusion and propose it first.

Gender Headcanon: that depends on my mood lol. most often either cis or mlm nb, typically either agender or a little bit genderfluid about it perhaps or both.

A ship I have with said character: OTPs isward and whatever the ship name is for drew's there too. with one of the jocks could be interesting potentially I think I'd like to see that sometime.

A BROTP I have with said character: Cody called him a little knife man.

A NOTP I have with said character: honestly nevin and Chris w him. not in the sense that I dislike content of them together or it existing. They're both dynamics that appeal to me! but I tried a few times and simply could never make myself care. Neither ship invokes any particular feelings or keep my attention, so I frankly just don't think about it much. (wasn't always the case, but currently this happens to be true for me and Nevin-or-Chris + everyone else that isn't each other, so they can go candoodle in peace ig.) also Felix or the evil jocks + Isaac. I've seen a little bit of it and I simply don't have any feelings about the concept, probably even less so than the above since while they're fun to watch cause problems, they exist solely to cause problems and give Cody jock lore so I'm not actual attached of them as people, as opposed to Nevin and Chris who obviously we're all already fond of as individual characters. as for actual NOTP in terms of NOTP. gross age dynamics, and the girls, I guess? The obvious? (one of those is worse than the other, but nonetheless)

A random headcanon: if I remember right it's outright canon he doesn't tell his parents jack because he doesn't want to deal with the trouble of it, but I think about this a lot so putting it here anyways?? and I'm definitely projecting at him about something that I don't even do anymore, (albeit I think everyone has to do this to some extent, ESPECIALLY in terms of you what you mention to your parents when you're a teenager, because the truth is that they genuinely don't need to know all about everything always. He's just bad about it worse.) but he has a habit of. simply not mentioning things that happen if he decides that it being mentioned won't directly a trigger an immediately drastic tangible improvement, and occasionally even when it would. hes only sometimes right that it won't. Telling his parents he got thrown into a bookcase isn't going to unconcussion him, so while there's not going to be negative consequences from telling them, it sure would be slightly inconvenient for him to explain and upsetting for them to find out about and then might try to do something about, and potentially lead to the magicky stuff being mentioned to them, which he hasn't told them about because.... uh. well, not that they would hurt him, but it could complicate things? and he wouldn't gain anything from them knowing, so it would be the same level of positive impact regardless, except that he wouldn't have to hide it which doesn't matter that much, not that he's... hiding it, exactly, but net no change vs the potential for it to be slightly worse or more annoying or inconvenient or take energy or be awkward or upsetting somehow without it curing cancer or anything, so yes he is actually. that said by now it'd kind of have to be a habit because I don't think he thinks enough in general to consciously be making that decision this much. negative points in thinking thoughts and negative points in communication. At this point I feel like it would take a BIG BIG payoff to get to him be open about Literally Anything, and regardless of whether he's right about the amount knowing about things will or won't fix, EMOTIONALLY he sure is a lot worse off for it. tbh I'm not even sure if this is technically even headcanon because it's kind of just an apsect of canon I latched onto really hard and had thoughts about. Unrelated but when he was younger (middle school + first grade probably) he bit people. He just did. If he was in a situation where biting someone would help him enough he would do it again. also unrelated again but I think he gets kind of weak about being kissed on the neck.

General Opinion over said character: I THINK ABOUT HIM A LOT AND EVERY TIME SOMEONE MAKES CONTENT ABOUT HIM I GET SO HAPPY ABOUT IT.

#help I used too mayne words to answer these #isaac beamer versus the supernatural #ibvs #isaac beamer #ask game #ask #i forgot my tags ahh

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autistic-beshelar · 2 years

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Hello, fellow aspec critter here!

I saw your post about Ashton being alloaro (100% agree btw) and in the tags you said you hc Molly as nebularomantic and I was just wondering, what does that mean? (I've also considered aro-spec Molly but I'm not committed to a specific hc yet)

Also, I get what you mean about sg in the "Enough-tp" post. I might just be biased 'cause it's not my fav ship but still. Also I know it's not canon but I low-key hc Caleb as ace-spec so that adds to it when it comes to sex-related stuff, be it sg or not. Like you said, it's not a bad thing, I just don't see it that way personally. I don't want to play into the "asexuality is caused by trauma" thing though.

Anyways sorry for rambling lol

hi aspec critter!! thank you for the ask and do not apologise for rambling it is NOTHING compared to this answer lmao

on molly:

nebularomantic is an orientation on the aromantic spectrum! likely it comes from the term 'nebulous', meaning cloud like, or ill-defined. it's when you have trouble differentiating between platonic and romantic feelings, due (in part or entirely) to being neurodivergent. so, it's solely a label for neurodivergent people! i headcanon molly as having a tbi, adhd, and npd, and i hc that he's a little bit in love with all his friends, but has trouble telling if it's in a platonic or romantic way, or somewhere inbetween or outside of that.

molly i think feels a lot, but has a lot of trouble working out what it is exactly he's feeling. he's the same with gender - pinpointing what it is is impossible, he just knows he's feeling a lot of it. he's more focused on just doing whatever makes him happy - if he wants to wear a dress one day he will, if he wants to sleep with someone and they want to sleep with him, he will, if he wants to give yasha 500 forehead kisses a day he will

on caleb:

as for caleb, yes i headcanon him as aspec as well, although i actually do think it's due to trauma for him! he gave me such strong asexual vibes in the beginning of the campaign, and i think he's slowly becoming more comfortable with it. especially with essek being demi, and caleb being somewhere on the bi ace spectrum (i feel like it probably goes up and down, depending on how he's doing mentally, i think he probably uses bisexual and asexual interchangeably), i think they're a great match for each other as they'll both be very understanding

(cw for sexual assault/trauma mention)

i can totally understand feeling uncomfortable with headcanoning him as ace-due-to-trauma, esp since there's such a harmful stereotype that people are only asexual because they're broken, or because we're mentally ill or have some kind of deficit. but sexuality is fluid, and mental illness and trauma can change so much about a person, so while the stereotype is bullshit, sometimes that really can be a person's experience. i think it would make a lot of sense if caleb was aspec bc of his sexual and relationship trauma from being a volstrucker and with astrid and wulf. i've talked to aces who are ace due to trauma like that, who just lose sexual attraction because of what happened to them. they might not have been 'born' that way, but their experience is still an asexual one, yknow?

especially when there's such great aro and ace rep in cr who AREN'T that way because of trauma - like caduceus, who is so kind and loving and very content with being aroace, like essek who, while traumatised, his being demisexual seems to have nothing to with that. there are so many different aspec experiences and it's nice to see that diversity portrayed.

honestly i have a long list of queer and neurodivergent headcanons for everyone (i have thoughts on cr1 as well, but i'm still early campaign for that)

also HELL YEAH aroallo ashton fanclub

#this is like. one of my favourite things to talk about #diversity and complexity of queer experiences compounded by being neurodivergent/mentally ill/traumatised etc #i think it's fascinating how interconnected everything is #critical role #mollymauk tealeaf #caleb widogast #you see like many ships. i love shadowgast but only my very specific interpretation of it #kokiri chatter

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ravs6709 · 3 years

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Tips for writing an aro/ace character?

Ooh, interesting question! I'm putting it all under a cut because it's super long

Before we start, there's some things to consider.

1) Personality? Are they super kind? A little cold? Chaotic? Level-headed?

2) Aromantism and asexuality are spectrums. Is your character full on aroace? Alloace? Aroallo? Demi? Grey? They don't really have to have a label exactly, but just an idea of whether they actually do experience attraction, even if rarely.

3) What's their attitude towards romance and sex? Some people adore both, some people hate both, some people are indifferent.

For example, I'm full on aroace. I've hated romance for a long time, but I actually kinda like it now, as long as it's good.

However, talks about sex make me queasy. It's kinda funny, but I can read through sex scenes without feeling queasy, but the moment it's said out loud, I can't. It's probably a visual thing, so I can't really imagine it, but talks make it more personal.

This is important to know because you'll figure out more of your character. A character who hates romance will make fun of it, or a character who is sex-repulsed might need to ask someone to tone it down, or just look uncomfortable. But someone who doesn't care just doesn't show a reaction

4) How does the world treat aspec people? Like? Is it modern, where some people support it, but some don't? Is it your own world where queer people are actually seen as normal people? It affects how your character behave, whether they feel they have to hide it or not

I know it's a lot to consider, but it helps out a lot. Trust me.

From there, it's mostly just... have a character. But also, I know that's kinda vague, so I'm gonna try and explain this section using some of my own characters. (Sorry in advance, I ended up taking this as an opportunity to infodump about my ocs)

I have a fantasy wip called Broken Harmony. I have three significant characters who are aspec. (I just wanna point out that they're all actually kinda old for MCs, like mid-late twenties)

1) Jwala (the MC). She's aromantic pansexual. She kinda falls into the stereotype of 'pan who sleeps around a lot', but I did have that because I wanted some sex positivity (also, it ended up being a way where I can figure out how exactly I felt about sex as a concept). She usually doesn't have an emotional connection with the people she sleeps with, but that's just her thing.

Then again, she doesn't usually form emotional connections in general (she very much can, but she doesn't want herself caring before she finds herself too weak and biased). She has a best friend who she cares very much about. In the end, she does let herself become more attached with people, but it doesn't affect the fact that she is aromantic. It's as simple as that.

As for her personality, she's kinda chaotic. She's strong and stubborn, and a little reckless (she's a noble/soldier). She can easily make friends, but again, she's usually not close with them. While it does kinda look like that her being aro affects things, it also kinda doesn't. She just simply doesn't vibe with romance.

If you were to put her into a modern au, not too much about her would change (except for maybe her distancing herself as much). She'd make tons of aro jokes, but is also kinda dirty minded

2) Sunay. He's the secondary main character. He's demi. Like Jwala, he also puts up a front (tbh, most of them do), as he's a noble in a war. He has to help and now show weakness. He also has a friend, but never was attracted to them. He's considered himself aroace.

He meets Jwala though and is forced to spend time with her a ton, but also they kinda just... click. Then after a bit he's like... oh I have feelings... that's new (they discuss stuff, they sleep together but don't get together romantically because obvious reasons, but stop after a bit). But then some crap happens, she breaks his trust (more complicated than that, but yes).

Another kinda-friend supports him, and they bond together and they work together and trust each other a lot. He does get together with the friend later on, but it's not really much of a focus. He does reconcile with Jwala though. (Their full dynamic is enemies to friends to sexual partners to friends to enemies to reluctant allies to friends. A lot, ik)

He's a lot more reserved and is known for generally being calm and level-headed. But also he's actually kinda awkward. He looks super intimidating, but he's honestly just socially awkward.

Him being demi doesn't actually change the way he acts necessarily, but it kinda shows the way he trusts.

If you were to put him into a modern au, he's the type of person who's okay with romance, but just not for him (also sometimes oblivious to sex jokes). But he is generally sex-repulsed, and would very much like for it to be toned down (which is how it's weird for him when he has that moment of "I think I can see myself with that person", but after he has that strong bond with them. He'd never been attracted before, but he kinda understands a bit better)

3) Alexis. They're actually Sunay's close friend. They don't really put up a front, they're not really a leader or important noble (tbh, I never really planned out the social status of the other characters as much). They're full on aroace, but it's a lot more chill.

I don't really have too much else to say, because they don't have as much focus as Jwala and Sunay do.

Alexis is optimistic and cheerful, and has a really creative imagination. Sometimes they use this to annoy Sunay, but they get along. Sometimes they look like they're pretty dumb, but they're super perceptive and smart. They're also more affectionate.

In a modern au, they're just vibing. No questioning about romance and all that. They make tons of aroace jokes, but not really into sexual topics. Like, not repulsed, just... meh. They'd understand more dirty jokes, but don't make them often

The whole point was basically that them being aro/ace doesn't really affect who they are as people as much. If anything, the biggest thing would be more of a "how do they react if someone were to bring up a certain topic"

Like Jwala and Alexis would be more okay, make jokes, while Sunay would try and tune it out more.

But not all people are like that. In some ways, I projected onto all of them, so you gotta figure out their attitudes and stuff. And then just see how it applies to them as a character. A serious, distant person can be aro, but so can a friendly, affectionate person.

Again, idk what kind of world yours is. Like if modern, there can be other things. Aro/ace culture. Dragons, cake, the ace ring! You can easily incorporate those with your character. They're more subtle, but aspec people will recognize them, and it just adds a little more to the character.

Also, we're not emotionless beings! Friends! Don't make your aroace characger super lonely. Platonic affection with their friends (heck, I'm touchstarved rn). Just show them being happy, and them being complete because that's what they are. They're whole, they're not broken. We are not incomplete just because we don't want romance/sex.

Okay. Before I end it off, here's some quick advice. Just some quick don'ts.

Do not

1) Make the heartless villain the only aspec character. That just villainizes aspec people

2) Make the only aro character someone who is emotionless. Not necessarily the villain, but just emotionless in general. This just portrays us as people who don't care about others

3) Make the only aro character super childlike and innocent. It makes us seem immature.

(Note how I say don't make the only aro character. You can write your character like that, but if you do, have some diversity there. And also, just figure out what some stereotypes are in general)

4) Have the only aro character feel like they're missing something, only for it to be a romantic partner.

Besides, some aspec people do experience attraction, so that just invalidates their identity. Notice with Sunay, I never said that he was missing something. He was fine as he is, the only change is his label. There's no "better" option, it's just how it is.

I think that as long as you're trying to be careful within your writing, you should be fine. Besides, in the end of the day, we're just people. So our identity doesn't really matter as much. We still make mistakes, grow, suffer and heal. As long as we're treated like people, that's already a good start.

If you want more advice, feel free to ask! I'm always willing to know more about your world and characters (and that would help me answer your future questions)!

I hope this helped you!

#asexuality #aromantism #astra's asks #anonymous #ravi talks about being aspec

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