#they in the void. I've always wanted to do this
Text
Part Four
Can't stop thinking about reader losing her cool.
"So we're closed, John." You said, trying to be cordial.
"Is that all you have to fucking say?" He practically growled before huffing. A humorless chuckle rumbling out of his chest. "I suppose not since you won't respond to any of us."
"Don't do that." You said taking a step back. Trying to create some distance between you and him. John would never physically hurt you. That much you knew.
"What?" He asked. His voice rising as he stepped closer to you. "Be angry that you pulled that shit and then left? Stopped talking to us. Changed your fucking locks. Last thing we even knew about you was that you got on a fucking plane and left. Even your friends wouldn't tell us anything besides that you were okay." "Which considering this came out of bloody nowhere, I find it highly unlikely that you are in any way 'okay'."
You took a deep breath. You wouldn't be intimidated. You wouldn't clam up. You wouldn't cry. You won't go back on your decision. You will be cordial and polite and not unleash everything you want to.
"I understand you might be upset, but it's for the best. It wasn't working out and I wanted to end on somewhat good terms. I would appreciate it if you lowered your voice and stopped speaking to me in that way." You could barely recognize your voice. It sounded so scripted. So robotic. But it was something you had been telling yourself. Excuses you had been telling yourself.
Because if you told yourself the truth. The picture you would paint would tell a different story. It wouldn't highlight the fact that John spoke to you like he was one of your men or that Johnny had the emotional capacity of a teaspoon. It wouldn't show what a flake Kyle was or that Simon was well and truly a mean-spirited person.
It would show how you weren't worth it. Four possible men. Four possibilities of happily ever after and none of them chose you. That no one ever did and no one ever would. You weren't worth it. You weren't loveable.
It wasn't right, but it was what the voices had been telling you late in the night. When you would crawl into your cold bed. The silence of the room not filled with John's steady breathing or the sound of Kyle's heartbeat as you laid you head on his chest. The absence of Johnny's occasional snoring or whatever Simon was watching playing in the background of your dreams.
In the void, all your dark thoughts came back at you.
"Upset?" He asked, his voice still louder than you would have liked. "An understatement considering the stunt you pulled."
"You think it was a stunt?"
"So Johnny thought with his dick and didn't plan things out. You should have told him instead of crying to Simon and then pulling this shit." "Christ, I knew you were still young, but I didn't take you for that immature."
"You know what?" "I'm done." "I am so fucking sick of making excuses for you all." "You want to act like I'm the immature one, John?" "You are 35-year-old man who cannot separate his work from his work like. You have continuously talked to and down to me like I am one of your men, only to turn around and always blame your shitty fucking attitude on work. I get that your job is stressful, but I did not sign up to be your verbal fucking punching bag."
"And this come and fucking go incident with Johnny. It has been a consistent issue with him coming over just to fuck. I've asked him for that last six months that 'hey, we've been seeing each other for a year and a half, I would love to meet your family' and suddenly the dates stop. He doesn't ask to see me until after 7 PM. He brings food occasionally, fucks me and leaves. Sometimes before I even wake up."
"And the only reason Kyle is the person I am the least pissed off with is because I haven't even seen him." You took a step closer, not noticing how the anger in John's eyes had softened. "I have not seen Kyle in weeks, to no fault of my own. I stopped reaching out to make dinner plans after the third time he canceled on a date night when I was either on my way or already at the restaurant."
"And Simon?" You scoffed. "Well, it doesn't really matter. After all, as he said I get mine. You all make me cum which is supposed to magically erase how shitty you've all been as partners. It's supposed to erase the nights I've cried myself to sleep debating on whether or not there was something wrong with me. How I'm not good enough to meet anyone else in your lives like some dirty fucking secret. How none of you can even bother to pencil me for a group dinner so I can tell you a publishing house picked up my book. How at some point you all stopped caring or maybe never did."
You took a breath. Blinking quickly to keep the tears at bay.
You wouldn't cry. You wouldn't cry.
"As Simon said it best, I should have known that spreading my legs wouldn’t end with one of you putting a ring on your finger.”
For once, John was silent. Unsure of what to say. An apology starting to form at the tip of his tongue before realizing 'sorry' wouldn't cut it. Not this time.
Had he really been that sharp with you? He knew that there were times he had gotten short, but he almost always apologized immediately after. If not at the very moment he took in your crest-fallen face, then definitely later. But he almost always told you he was sorry. Didn't he?
"So as I said," you swallowed down the lump in your throat. "I'm closed. We're done. Now get out." Your face held no sadness. Even though your eyes were nearly full to the brim with unshed tears, you weren't sad.
You were finally angry.
#captain john price#kyle gaz garrick#simon ghost riley#call of duty#john soap mactavish#angst#angst with a happy ending
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
right so. when replaying rejuv for v13.5. i'm literally only on ch9 rn and forgot most of endgame but i'm having thoughts that the interceptor has wayyy more characterization than before.
like i've pondered "is the interceptor a direct player stand-in or their own distinct entity?" before but replaying made me really im favor of the latter
and i think that. the kind of core defining moment of the interceptor as a Person. is always grief. The moment that made them a person is grief.
spoilers for like, mooost of the game, maybe? primarily up to blacksteeple and terajuma though
a lot of waffling without much point other than "i love silent protagonists and unconventional explorations of personhood a lot"
So. the first time control is REALLY taken from the player's hands in how the protag FEELS is. melia's "death". because no matter how you play, the interceptor was stuck in depression for a week and just staring at a wall until they had enough energy to finally set out again in melia's name.
and, really, the FIRST thing they are defined by as a character is the loss of their mother. when the oceana sinks, the protag is the only person left, and the motivation of the pokemon journey for them amounts to "do ANYTHING to fill the void, and maybe find out what happened to mom in the meantime." They miss their mom! A lot!
Blacksteeple is of course the point where this gets even worse. When Nancy dies for them, they're catatonic again. And after that, so much of them is defined by the grief of her sacrifice. Like the optional encounter with a Nancy ghost in Amethyst Cave, right at the top of it, when the interceptor's first brush with grief came in its depths. "Why do I feel this way?" they can't comprehend the emotion they're defined by.
Even before they got a journal to snark around in, sidequests that gave them the occasional line of actual dialogue, the interceptor has always grieved, and they do not want to grieve again.
Like. Okay. The A-Gang, right? Wasn't it that they allowed the interceptor to use their souls because they were tired? this terrible catastrophe happened to them. they're all dead and gone, their home is destroyed, they just... cant go on anymore. their grief destroyed them.
in a way, the interceptor is made to grieve. and they are made to move on, again and again and again.
#feli speaks#pokemon rejuvenation#rejuv spoilers#man.... i truly cannot wait to see all the new stuff#I AM ON CH9 OF 13.5 DO NOT SPOIL#i played all of v12 though
34 notes
·
View notes
Text
mitski songs that make me think of reid + a specific lyric
spencer reid is very mitski. but these were the first to come to mind. i do not take criticism.
- working for the knife
honestly, the entire song reminds me of reid, but this in particular:
I always thought the choice was mine
And I was right, but I just chose wrong
I start the day lying and end with the truth
That I'm dying for the knife
- liquid smooth
I'm liquid smooth, come touch me, too
I'm at my highest peak, I'm ripe
About to fall
How I feel this river rushing through my veins
With nowhere else to go, it circles 'round
- class of 2013
Mom, would you wash my back?
This once, and then we can forget
And I'll leave what I'm chasing
For the other girls to pursue
Mom, am I still young?
Can I dream for a few months more?
- i don't smoke
Just don't leave me alone
Wondering where you are
I am stronger than you give me
Credit for
If your hands need to break
More than trinkets in your room
You can lean on my arm
As you break my heart
- abbey
again, the entire song is very reid, but:
I am something
I have been something
I was born something
What could I be?
There is a light that I can see
But only, it seems, when there's darkness in me
There is a dream that I sometimes see
That only appears in the dark of sleep
- i bet on losing dogs
Will you let me, baby, lose
On losing dogs
I know they're losing and I'll pay for my place
By the ring
Where I'll be looking in their eyes when they're down
I wanna feel it
I bet on losing dogs
I always want you when I'm finally fine
- the deal
Then of course, nothing replied, nothing speaks to you in the night
And I walked my way home, there was no one in sight
Save a bird perched upon a streetlight, watchin' me
So, I stopped and let it watch 'til I found that it said
"Now I'm taken, the night has me
You won't hear me singin'
You're a cage without me
Your pain is eased, but you'll never be free for
Now I'm taken, the night has me"
- fireworks
this is perhaps one of the reid-est. here's the particular lyric:
One morning this sadness will fossilize
And I will forget how to cry
I'll keep going to work and you won't see a change
Save perhaps a slight gray in my eye
I will go jogging routinely
Calmly and rhythmically run
And when I find that a knife's sticking out of my side
I'll pull it out without questioning why
- i don't like my mind
again, the entire song is reid, but this is my pick:
I don't like my mind, I don't like being left alone in a room
With all its opinions about the things that I've done
So, yeah, I blast music loud, and I work myself to the bone
And on an inconvenient Christmas, I eat a cake
- first love / late spring
very cliché, but i HAD to include it! here:
And I was so young when I behaved 25
Yet now, I find I've grown into a tall child
And I don't wanna go home
Let me walk to the top of the big night sky
- there's nothing left for you
You could touch fire
You could fly
It was your right
It was your life
And then it passed
To someone new
It'll keep passin' on
Long after you
- nobody
And I don't want your pity
I just want somebody near me
Guess I'm a coward
I just want to feel alright
- because dreaming costs money, my dear
I once lived in the sea
Bring me to your ear, you can hear
The tide where I used to be
Though now I'm but a shell
- a pearl
Sorry, I don't want your touch
It's not that I don't want you
Sorry, I can't take your touch
It's just that I fell in love with a war
Nobody told me it ended
And it left a pearl in my head
And I roll it around every night
Just to watch it glow
Every night, baby, that's where I go
- real men
Real men keep cool in the face of a fire
Go down with the ship
And real men don't eat
'Cause they're above that, damn it
Oh, I'm gonna be a real man
- crack baby
It's been a long, hard 20 year summer vacation
Both these 20 years tryna fill the void
Crack baby, you don't know what you want
But you know that you had it once
And you know that you want it back
Crack baby, you don't know what you want
But you know that you're needing it
And you know that you need it bad
50 notes
·
View notes
Text
The new one piece chapter has me spiraling sdjkfshf so here's a theory that crossed my mind and is becoming more plausible the more I think about it
Spoilers (obviously) under the cut
The tl;dr is: What if the world of One Piece has always had rising sea levels/sinking land? What if these natural events happen in an 800 year cycle? What if there was way more land (like the real world) before the formation of the World Govt?
I'm not gonna get into the details of why that is bc that is a different mind boggling discussion and it isn't really important here. But if there's always been that threat, it would explain so much about the Void Century and the True History.
As many people have already pointed out, the threat of the world sinking into the ocean explains why Noah was needed. It's a giant ship half the size of Fishmen Island that was meant to be raised to the surface, likely for the inevitable future where there's virtually no land above water. It could be that threat never happened at the end of the Void Century so Noah wasn't needed, but what if it did happen? This would suggest a huge event happened that caused sea levels to rise 800 years ago.
This ties into my next point, that the Great Kingdom was part of land that is now underwater. We've already seen that there's underwater ruins from Jinbe's cover story where Wadatsumi was throwing ruins onto an island, one such ruin being a poneglyph, meaning that kingdom (maybe the land that island was once part of) was either part of the Great Kingdom itself or allied with it. So it wouldn't be a stretch to consider that the Great Kingdom is also currently below the ocean. It would also have made it easier for the World Govt to completely erase the Kingdom from existence, since it was already underwater and inaccessible to most people other than Fishmen. I can't recall if any ruins that are Void Century old have been canonically shown, which would mean either they've been completely destroyed with nothing left, or the areas have been continuously lived in and renovated, or they're in the ocean and the majority of structures currently on land is younger than the Void Century AKA people moved to higher lands when sea levels rose. It could be all the above too! If the Great Kingdom was at risk of sinking, then Noah might have been meant to carry their displaced citizens.
If those during the Void Century knew sea levels would soon rise, it might have been the reason for all the turmoil that started the Great War. Conflicts over limited resources, about who will live and who will die, general fear and anxiety, things like that. The 20 kingdoms that eventually formed the World Govt might have been suspicious about how the Great Kingdom was using their resources and went to war with them. Maybe they were threatened by how much power the Great Kingdom had as they prepared for the natural disaster (ie. the ancient weapons and Noah; from what we know from Egghead, technology was incredibly advanced at the time). Maybe it was just all boiled down to wanting control over a terrifying situation.
If the land sinking into the ocean is a natural phenomenon, then Joy Boy's apology to the Fishmen and mentioning of his return would mean that the event would happen again. Maybe it happens in an 800 year cycle, which explains why Joy Boy (and those sea kings in the Fishmen Arc) knew that Noah was still needed and how he knew exactly when he'd return. It also explains why Rayleigh warned that if he told Robin about the Void Century when the Strawhats first arrived at Sabaody, she "wouldn't be able to do anything about it as she was then." I think I've always assumed this had to do with the formation of the World Govt and how to dismantle it, but it might actually be about how the world is sinking and through following the poneglyphs, one would find the way to save those in danger of being displaced. The Ohara scholars had discovered this, and now Vegapunk is continuing their legacy by making this info public.
And as I'm writing this, I'm realizing that if sea levels rise/land sinks in an 800 year cycle, this might be the "true history" of the world, or at least part of it considering Joy Boy's story made the Roger's Pirates laugh. But it certainly is important and relevant as the wikia site describes! But why would the World Govt try to hide this? I'm not entirely sure. Maybe for the sake of having control over information and thus having power over the world, but there could be so many other reasons. There's hints throughout the story that suggest they're still preparing for a world with almost no land though, such as the Tequila Wolf bridge that's supposed to connect islands together, and the fact that the founding monarchs moved their families to Mary Geoise on the Red Line. Law also stated in Punk Hazard that the Govt has been researching growth hormones to turn humans into giant soldiers, and they've been doing this for centuries. It's possible that the research was really for the capability to walk through parts of the ocean when there's no longer any land above water.
Anyway my brain is fried thinking about all these things lol. There's so many other factors to consider but I'll save that for a later time when I get more sleep sjdkfhsdk
#i hope this all makes sense in the morning LOL#i feel like that always sunny meme#one piece#one piece spoilers#one piece 1113#joy boy
32 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hi. Sorry, I just really feel like complaining. Obviously you can ignore this, I just have nowhere else to word vomit lol.
I've been trying to shift since 2019. I've gotten into the void state for like 20 seconds but got too freaked out/excited and lost stability before I could manifest or shift anywhere.
I feel like I'm going crazy. I've done the whole thing of pasting sticky notes with affirmations all over my apartment, had meditated for an hour or more a day for weeks at a time, listened to subliminals 24/7 and obvious tried all the classic methods like the raven method, julia method, etc, etc.
I've had multiple lucid dreams where I tried to make portals and I've even had a lucid dream (or I guess I shifted) where I saw a "centre" for shifting with a bunch of islands and floating petals that we used as transportation between islands. I got a whole tour by some guide and he showed me other lives I'm currently living. That was like a year ago, and I haven't manifested anything significant or went anywhere since then. I'm going through a really tough time right now. I wouldn't have gone on like this if I didn't believe in it, but I'm just feeling really beaten down. I'm exhausted and frustrated.
Hi lovely, I'm so sorry you feel this way.
It’s understandable. But remember all the lucid dreams you’ve had and the void states that you’ve been in. They’re a reflection of your ability for shifting. You’ve been incredibly close before, and your subconscious mind is capable of doing so. You can take a break if you want, because shifting requires a healthy amount of persistence. Just remember that no matter how long of a break you have, you’ve come really far already. The void state is one step away from shifting. And don’t forget your lucid dream, where you basically saw your ability to change realities. Don’t take my word for granted. Just think about it. You can do it, you do have the abilities, all you have to do is keep going. You can take a small break if you want to rest, but don’t let yourself lose all your progress. Stay determined, stay motivated, don’t lose your abilities. You can do this!!
You’ve come so far, and you’ve been in the final stages. Don’t think about how it’s been years without a single shift. It’s been years where you’ve learned techniques, you’ve learned about yourself, you’ve honed in your shifting abilities. Just because you haven’t shifted in years doesn’t mean you’ve made no progress. This is just the next step in your shifting journey. Go forward. Take that step. Shift like nothing’s stopping you. You’re so close. You’ve had enough time to think about it. You’ve been here, wanting to get to your desired reality for all this time. You haven’t given up on it yet. You’ve kept coming back hoping, trying, dreaming, wanting to shift to the reality you want and finally be with your hard work! Why would you stop now? You owe it to yourself to keep trying. Don’t give up, because it has always been your dream to shift.
Your determination, drive, motivation, and dedication to shifting is so praiseworthy. It's been years since you started this journey, and you haven't given up! You've persisted for this long and you've gotten close so many times, it's almost impossible for you to not have enough abilities to shift realities. Remember all the things you've seen and experienced while trying to shift realities, all the things you've gone through and the efforts of hard work that you've put into shifting realities. Don't give up now. You just have to keep going. You can do it, I believe in you!
Keep going. Don’t stop now.
I mean, just think about it: you possess this incredible power within you to shape your own existence. You're not just a passive observer in the grand theater of life; you're the playwright, the director, and the star actor all rolled into one.
You see, the universe is like this vast, infinite canvas, and you? You're the artist putting forth the brush. Every thought, every belief, every intention you hold is like a stroke on that canvas.
Now, here's the kicker: you have the ability to shift to any reality you choose. It's not some distant, unattainable dream—it's within your awareness right here, right now. Reality-shifting isn't this Herculean task reserved for a select few; it's as easy as changing your mind.
You are the god of your reality, lovely!!! You have the power to shift!!! It's not about waiting for the stars to align or some external force to swoop in and save the day. It's about realizing that the power you seek has been within you all along. So, embrace it. Own it. Know that you are the creator of your own destiny. And when doubts creep in or challenges arise, remember this: you are god, and reality-shifting is as easy as flipping the script. You've got this. After all, you are god.
And remember! You don't actually need specific methods to shift realities; it's about tapping into your innate power as a being that is pure consiousnious not attached to any body, mind, or reality! . Every moment, you're making choices that shift you to a different reality, and reality-shifting to your DR is just as easy! It's just bevomi b aware of it. While methods and techniques can be helpful tools, they're just that—tools! The real magic happens when you tap into your own inner wisdom and intuition, trusting yourself to allow the process to unfold organically. Embrace your innate creativity and intuition, and watch as your reality begins to shift in ways you never thought possible.
Now just remember my love, to keep on visualizing, keep on affirming, and most importantly keep persisting!!!! . And, be gentle with yourself along the way. Shifting may not happen overnight, but each step you take brings you closer to your DR. So hold onto hope, and know that your breakthrough is just around the corner.
#anonymous asks#reality shifting#shifting#shift#shifting blog#shifting realities#shifting consciousness#shifting reality#shifting antis dni#anti shifters dni#shiftblr#shifting motivation#shifters
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ah. It is very hard to not have a person that is My Person. I've always had one, or- thought I did. Perception being everything, that void was filled.
My first one I lost when I was still very young, and I held onto her and waited for her for decades before allowing myself to realize she hadn't been there since elementary school. My loyalty and love so deep, waiting on a ghost.
Another dear Person I kept and kept and kept despite their toxicity and leech-like behavior. They were my Friend, but 18 years on I finally had to cut them loose when I admitted to myself that I was hanging on to someone who would never do anything aside from drain me.... financially, time-wise, emotionally. It was hard putting my foot down. But that one was my choice.
Then there was... my Person. The one I met in college, who asked me to fake-date her to get back at her friend's for not telling her that they knew her boyfriend was cheating on her. I fell for her, even knowing she wasn't queer, and even when our deep and intense friendship was suddenly put on the back burner when she got herself a new shiny boyfriend, it took me ten years... ten years, to realize she wasn't my Person.
A Person isn't a lover, let me be clear. They're the one that's there for you. A deep friendship, sometimes more, certainly, but not all of these People have been Loves.
So watching her get married was a joy, though I had wanted more, and letting that romantic emotion go away was a easy. You see, I still thought she was my Person. And just this month, after years of not getting reached out to, of me doing all the work to see her, just this month did it finally click in, a decade after thinking this was my Person, that she isn't. She never has been. I just thought she was.
I have a partner I'm married to. I have children. I have family that love me. I am blessed and grateful in many ways.
But I have no friend who is my Person. The one who sees me. The one who thinks about me as often as I them, who plans together and cares the same way.
I have a lot of ghosts of people I thought were more than they ever were.
And today, scrolling through my phone contacts and my social media I really had it hit home.
I don't have... anyone, anywhere close to the brief flickers of closeness I'd had with these ghosts. Online friends who I've never met in person come as close as possible, but no one I can touch. Or invite over. Visit, hug, plan things with, talk to in person.
I am surrounded by the ghosts of those who moved on, and the transparent holograms of friends I cannot reach.
It is.... lonely.
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
To chase away any bad luck
Happy new year🎇
#dddaily4sherin#day 187!#i posted the wip on twt before midnight in my timezone but forgot to post here BHAHSHA#grian#scott smajor#pearlescentmoon#inthelittlewood#goodtimeswithscar#life series#trafficblr#traffic smp#they in the void. I've always wanted to do this#dont mind the absolutely broken perspective look i had limited time HSFJAHD HEAD IN HANDS#happy new year!! :D#my art
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
no kind of relationship will ever be as impactful as the slightly toxic slightly homoromantic hyperdependent bestfriendship you had with someone when you were like 12
#I've realized lately that I think my whole life I've just been trying to recreate that lol#we could watch the world burn around us but as long as I have you in my arms I wouldn't care.#and then you grow up and grow apart and a gaping void has been left in my soul and no matter how hard I try it can never be filled#and there's no chance of getting it back either-- those 12 year old girls simply don't exist anymore#so I have to live the rest of my life yearning for a home that I can never go back to#this isn't supposed to be sad btw but like. idk lame wax poetic lmao#I think she's still on Facebook tho should I message her LOL#we haven't talked in like. 8 years#just like 'heyyy just wanted to let u know that I was in love with you and u completely changed my life and your influence still-#follows me to this day & I always hold u in good graces despite the wrongs we did to each other and I still love you in some estranged way#I wish you the best and I'm sorry I missed your birthday for the past 8 years ♥️ I hope ur doing well bye !!!!'#pls tell me I'm not the only one who experienced this LMFAO#personal post
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#right i forgot the worst part about being at my parents house#the malnutrition#of what i can eat in the fridge we have a variety of sauces and jams and in the pantry there is flour and salt#and my mother just informed me that we're not going grocery shopping for at least a week maybe two in order to 'use up what we have'#that is NOT the reason i can guarantee it#she's doing this because she thinks it'll help her lose weight#you'd think after 35 years of yoyo dieting she'd figure out that starving and under nourishing yourself actually is bad for your health#it's not like i'm great at taking care of myself either but at least i get my food groups#i'm just so frustrated because i can't afford to leave#but being here is so disasterous not just for my mental health but my physical health as well#and also i've actually put ON weight being here because since we have like no real food in the house all i have to eat really are pancakes#which are calorically dense but nutritionally void and because i'm not getting any nutrients i'm always hungry#i think i'll just go to the shops later tonight or tomorrow and get food just for myself#if she wants to 'use up what we have' she can but i'm not doing that i'm just not#but also that's also annoying cause i have no current income and also i'm not allowed to drive so i'll have to get my bro to take me#which is a whole thing in of itself and i just grrrr#personal#vent
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
#fiori sounds cool ! is crop haven likeee a farming life sim ? i#wonder what camellia being her rival means 🤔
In response to these tags left by @dmclr on the render I posted last night: Crop Haven is indeed a farming lifesim! It's inspired by the older Harvest-Moon-that-are-now-Story-of-Seasons games - if you'd like to know more, it has a Tumblr blog which I can link below for you!
The game is still very in-development, but it is available for download if you wanted to try it out - it's a very sweet little game so far, snd even though it is very about monsters it's definitely very light-hearted in a lot of ways~
Regarding me listing Camellia as Fiori's rival, this is simply because I was trying to replicate the format of the reference pictures that the actual in-game characters have on the wiki, as if Fiori was an NPC in the game itself. You as the player are able to marry many of the characters in the game, but there are also a number of "rival pairings" that can arise over time in the following years after that, where the characters will marry each other instead. So, in this case, it just means that if Fiori was actually in the game but the player didn't decide to pursue her romantically, then she would end up marrying Camellia instead, by default! So, Camellia would technically function as the player's rival for Fiori's affection, so to speak.
(According to the wiki, some characters will have multiple potential pairing options depending on the player's actions - for example, Martin will tend to marry Surge by default if you don't do anything, but you can potentially get her to end up with Ao instead, or even Jade if you really put in the work.
For Fiori, I think her alternative option would be Polly, because I think she's adorable and both are monsters tied to the water in some way.)
I hope that this helps explain things!!
#heart of the void#selfshipping#self‑insert: fioritura tag pending#honestly I may just shorten her name to fiori. it suits her better. but then if I do that I lose the reference of it being a musical term#since fioritura - ''flourish'' or maybe more literally ''flowering'' - describes a way of embellishing a melodic line#and her name being a piece of musical terminology is supposed to be a fun reference to how sirens are infamous for their songs#(..I should stress that fiori's singing doesn't have the typical mythological effect of a siren's song. it just sounds nice)#i've never actually directly copied tags off a reblog before soooo hopefully this works#clara tag!#since.. you were the one who asked the question I guess?? >w<#I just wanted to make sure you saw this hehe#so to cut a long story short it's just me trying to make myself sound vaguely more canon than i actually am like always haha
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
ok this is a long fucking shot but does anyone out here know anything about. Allergies but rather than having itchy runny-nose symptoms you just feel systemically like shit. Like fatigue, nausea, vague headache, moderate-to-severe excercise intolerance, that sort of thing. But correlated to like, pollen exposure. Or just air quality in general?
The best ballpark diagnosis I have is asthma, but I've never actually had An Asthma Attack so I don't know if that's.... right. And even if it is, I can't really find good research or resources on managing systematic effects of asthma at this like... non-acute, non life-threatening severity.
Sometimes with weird medical shit like this, there's information that exists if only you can find the right keyword to search.... maybe somebody's got something?
Or even just, it'd be nice to hear if anyone elae deals with this and I'm not, like, completely insane*
*for this. other insanity unspecified.
#every day for the last week I've woken up and my immediate first thought has been#Ugh i wanna take a nap#Not even like “i didn't sleep enough I want to sleep longer”#But like. I need a completely different kind of sleep. That makes me rested.#In a way that neither sleeping or any type of restful activity or non-activity I've tried has accomplished.#fatigue is stupid!! It sucks!!#And every time I have had a bit of energy I've immediately totally overdone it and fucked myself up#Because I'm BORED I'm TIRED of being too fucking tired to do anything!!#Finally just put together today that it might be the same goddamn allergies that always get me#At this time of year.#After going outside to walk around in the sun and look at plants (always good for my brain)#And getting lightheaded and short of breath#So that's super cool and completely unhelpful. I already take daily allergy meds#And they help! But only so much#I've tried an inhaler and corticosteroid spray but the side effects suck#So it's just. Untreatable unless it gets bad enough for the side effects to be worth it I guess?#I feel like I should be more grateful it's not more severe.#I know a lot of people have it worse.#But it's frustrating also to be stuck in a place where it's not bad enough to *do* anything about#Ugh sorry this is very long and self-involved#And i will possibly delete it in a minute#I just gotta yell into the void here
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
oh, I vividly remembered that last scene from HxH, what the heck
#I've gone like 20 episodes without remembering much of anything beyond a few ''oh yeah I remember that plotline'' moments#and then someone threatened Gon and Killua went after him secretly#and the entire scene came back to me in VIVID detail#I went from ''haha is Killua going to pull the So I'm An Assassin And You Will Not Touch My Best Friend routine?? lol classic''#to OH THIS IS THE SCENE WITH THE KNIFE. AND THE MIRROR. AND THE ''CLOSE YOUR EYES SLOWLY''#how many times must I have rewatched that as a kid to remember it that clearly?? left a Huge impression apparently#I guess I've always wanted to be Killua#all the scenes and plotlines I remember best have been his#the skateboard introduction#the Pulling Out A Man's Heart From His Chest#and now apparently the mirror scene#the only other scenes I know are coming involve Killua's sister; Killua developing lightning powers; and Killua grief-stricken about Gon#Robin speaks#hunterxhunterblogging#oh and the cat alien#I don't know if anyone here has seen hxh by the way lol I may just be speaking into the void. but that's alright#I don't actually recommend hunter x hunter but I like it#but it's like. white bread to me. not the most nutritious but good for getting me through rough times#I do not have the spare brainpower for anything more serious than this right now
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Thinking about a girl in my tutorial class last year who was soooso cool and that I wanted to be friends with soooo bad. and also how she lingered a bit after I was chatting with her but then had to chat with a friend I ran into... sigh..
#And then I made like an.. In class friend who was in this tutorial so I say w her but she wasn't actually very nice#I saw a tiktok the other day and now I think abt.. Lingering alot#And I'm just like. Man I so had a chance to be friends w her. Maybe. I feel like yes. There's always hope#But there's also that like. Whole year of time passage that removes all the bad parts and distorts your memory like water marble#I don't even know if she's graduated. But now I'm like. I'm putting that out there.. We could be friends.. I'm so cool and nice..#I've just been thinking abt her a lot even though she like. Has not existed to me for almost a year#I just like. Have been sitting and thinking#I'm so like#In a mood. I'm in a i don't want to talk to anyone nor do I want to see new people#But when I get like that I'm also a bit like.. But what if 💕💕💕💕💕 true love found me 💞💓💘💕#Ouuaghh.#Girls are feeling lots of emotions and maybe they should um.#I don't know. I'll take suggestions.#Void talks#Melts into a little puddle#I've been in such a delusional mood lately it's so crazy. What's in my head and why is there an evil little mouse controlling my brain
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
i had a long break from playing vns and now that i've come back in the recent years, i've noticed thar the quality and what people do with the medium is incredible! lkyt lets you save your favorite voice lines and play them back at any time and showing previous dialog lets you jump back to any previous bit you can see. uuultrac is visually stunning and being a kinetic novel it really shows how having text, pictures, and sound can enhance a story. not a single thing in it is out of place and you could write entire essays about the use of colors or different art styles in it. no one else is doing it like milk inside a bag of milk inside a bag of milk. it takes less than 20 minutes to play it. there are so many visual novels out there and i'll never run out of things to be impressed by the way things are now
#not saying all vns need to be doing cool as fuck shit with their mediums and stuff. like aceattorneys are GREAT games despite#mechanically being extremly basic and i love them#i need to find blogs who dissert and analyze cool visual novels#i dont want to be a guy who talks about them only i want to read about them too#leevi talks#idk im just yelling into the void#bc ok i play a lot of rpgs right. and the analysis of every part of those you see on this site is insanely hood#*good#i want that but with vns#i mean theres that one woman who does exactly that on youtube and i love her for that but i dont always have time for an hour plus long#video about a vn ive never even heard of#sometimes i want analysis of the stuff i know#unfortunately most vns that make me insane are those fucking yaoi games and i've yet to met someone fujoing out via literary analysis
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
You know, my grandmother died last week. And I am far away and the grief is complicated by so many factors, and honestly it still hasn't sunk in fully that she's gone. Unlike my grandfather, who we lost to dementia long before we lost him, this was sudden. None of this is really the point though.
Since she's been gone, there's been some weird moment pretty much every day. A flower in her favourite colour blooming despite freezing temperatures, a deer on a road when it's never happened before. A sweater she knitted for me as a toddler that I thought was in a closet being in a drawer instead. Seeing the truth in a photo that I've always been a little exasperated about.
If I was spiritual, I'd think she's sending me messages from the other side to let me know she's alright. I'm not. But I do believe that it's been easier, these past days, to see all the little ways her love is still out there.
Now, my grandmother was many things. She was kind and loving, funny, talented, sharp. She was also a poor country woman who had very little time for nonsense. And so it was with absolute delight and a few tears that I share with you all today's weirdness. This morning, after a week of floating rather vaguely through life, I was smacked in the face reminded of one of her all time favourite sayings when someone was feeling sorry for themselves.
Thanks Mommas
#she did not pick this up from Letterkenny to be clear#she'd used it for decades#but accent-wise Letterkenny is the winning gif#also I've heard that it's usage can vary in sincerity and exact intent#from her it was always just a funny chastisement to *do* something beyond feeling sorry for yourself#not that you couldn't wallow but she didn't want you to drown#so I guess it's time to do something with that wood#mixing my metaphors here but oh well#I might delete this later but it just feels right to send the thought out into the void for a little while
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
I've been trying super hard this month to not use such harsh language towards myself (ugly, disgusting, a monster) all words I've used about my physical appearance and it's all stuff I've been called since I was little. I'm trying to adopt the mindset of not caring if other people think i'm ugly as long as I don't think it that's what matters. If someone is going to treat someone as if they are below them because they find them unattractive then that is on them and says a lot about them as a person and that isn't a person I want to be around.
I think since being diagnosed with body dysmorphia I'm becoming more self aware of my own language towards myself because my brain has a warped perception of myself. I know I'll never have the most perfect self esteem but I can't keep letting other people bring me down and not believing the people who uplift me.
I'm super happy with myself for making progress which i'm noticing.
#i know i'll have to live with mental health issues for my entire life but i have to learn to manage it rather than let it control me#my niece is almost 8 and is starting to be aware of a self esteem and I don't want her to be like me when I was her age#do i think i'm beautiful? not really but i've always been so outspoken about how looks don't mean everything#yet I don't take my own advice#which i need to start doing#sky rambles#DL#just talking into the void
17 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
hammerandthundergames-blog
Mastery Journal
divinecosmeticsurgerylove-blog
Divine Cosmetic Surgery
kharssims
Khar!!!
afieldofheather
A FIELD OF HEATHER
deadly-icons
gratisfaction