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inkskinned · 11 months

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so one of the things that's so horrifying about birth control is that you have to, like, navigate this incredibly personal choice about your body and yet also face the epitome of misogyny. like, someone in the comments will say it wasn't that bad for me, and you'll be utterly silenced. like, everyone treats birth control like something that's super dirty. like, you have no fucking information or control over this thing because certain powerful people find it icky.

first it was the oral contraceptives. you went on those young, mostly for reasons unrelated to birth control - even your dermatologist suggested them to control your acne. the list of side effects was longer than your arm, and you just stared at it, horrified.

it made you so mentally ill, but you just heard that this was adulthood. that, yes, there are of course side effects, what did you expect. one day you looked up yasmin makes me depressed because surely this was far too intense, and you discovered that over 12,000 lawsuits had been successfully filed against the brand. it remains commonly prescribed on the open market. you switched brands a few times before oral contraceptives stopped being in any way effective. your doctor just, like, shrugged and said you could try a different brand again.

and the thing is that you're a feminist. you know from your own experience that birth control can be lifesaving, and that even when used for birth control - it is necessary healthcare. you have seen it save so many people from such bad situations, yourself included. it is critical that any person has access to birth control, and you would never suggest that we just get rid of all of it.

you were a little skeeved out by the implant (heard too many bad stories about it) and figured - okay, iud. it was some of the worst pain you've ever fucking experienced, and you did it with a small number of tylenol in your system (3), like you were getting your bikini line waxed instead of something practically sewn into your body.

and what's wild is that because sometimes it isn't a painful insertion process, it is vanishingly rare to find a doctor that will actually numb the area. while your doctor was talking to you about which brand to choose, you were thinking about the other ways you've been injured in your life. you thought about how you had a suspicious mole frozen off - something so small and easy - and how they'd numbed a huge area. you thought about when you broke your wrist and didn't actually notice, because you'd thought it was a sprain.

your understanding of pain is that how the human body responds to injury doesn't always relate to the actual pain tolerance of the person - it's more about how lucky that person is physically. maybe they broke it in a perfect way. maybe they happened to get hurt in a place without a lot of nerve endings. some people can handle a broken femur but crumble under a sore tooth. there's no true way to predict how "much" something actually hurts.

in no other situation would it be appropriate for doctors to ignore pain. just because someone can break their wrist and not feel it doesn't mean no one should receive pain meds for a broken wrist. it just means that particular person was lucky about it. it should not define treatment.

in the comments of videos about IUDs, literally thousands of people report agony. blinding, nauseating, soul-crushing agony. they say things like i had 2 kids and this was the worst thing i ever experienced or i literally have a tattoo on my ribs and it felt like a tickle. this thing almost killed me or would rather run into traffic than ever feel that again.

so it's either true that every single person who reports severe pain is exaggerating. or it's true that it's far more likely you will experience pain, rather than "just a pinch." and yet - there's nothing fucking been done about it. it kind of feels like a shrug is layered on top of everything - since technically it's elective, isn't it kind of your fault for agreeing to select it? stop being fearmongering. stop being defensive.

you fucking needed yours. you are almost weirdly protective of it. yours was so important for your physical and mental health. it helped you off hormonal birth control and even started helping some of your symptoms. it still fucking hurt for no fucking reason.

once while recovering from surgery, they offered you like 15 days of vicodin. you only took 2 of them. you've been offered oxy for tonsillitis. you turned down opioids while recovering from your wisdom tooth extraction. everything else has the option. you fucking drove yourself home after it, shocked and quietly weeping, feeling like something very bad had just happened. the nurse that held your hand during the experience looked down at you, tears in her eyes, and said - i know. this is cruelty in action.

and it's fucked up because the conversation is never just "hey, so the way we are doing this is fucking barbaric and doctors should be required to offer serious pain meds" - it's usually something around the lines of "well, it didn't kill you, did it?"

you just found out that removing that little bitch will hurt just as bad. a little pinch like how oral contraceptives have "some" serious symptoms. like your life and pain are expendable or not really important. like maybe we are all hysterical about it?

hysteria comes from the latin word for uterus, which is great!

you stand here at a crossroads. like - this thing is so important. did they really have to make it so fucking dangerous. and why is it that if you make a complaint, you're told - i didn't even want you to have this in the first place. we're told be careful what you wish for. we're told that it's our fault for wanting something so illict; we could simply choose not to need medication. that maybe if we don't like the scraps, we should get ready to starve.

we have been saying for so long - "i'm not asking you to remove the option, i'm asking you to reconsider the risk." this entire time we hear: well, this is what you wanted, isn't it?

#where's the word woman in this u might wonder if u suck #good news i am nonbinary and have a uterus so that is something that can happen #im also gender fluid tho which means im immune to certain psychic damage bc if u call me a woman i'll be like <3 okay <3 #writeblr #the tightrope of ''ppl need access to this''#and like also #''what the fuck is going on over there'' is like. so difficult as an activist #i was <3 punctured <3 during mine #and almost bled out on the table :) they didn't have anyone standing by bc it's ''just a little insertion''#so i started crashing and i vaguely remember apologizing for the fuss as i heard my heart rate monitor start going <3 tachycardic <3 #she wasn't even a bad doctor tbh #ps btw the reason i even HAD a heart monitor is that i have a genuine heart condition and they knew GOING IN that there was a chance #i'd crash on the table #like my heart just likes to do fun little tricks and <3 stop working <3 (i do not want to discuss the specifics ty i am okay im ontop of it #and they were like 'oh u will be fine' and then she did do a puncture thru my uterus . pop!#and im sitting there dizzy and feeling my heartrate start to drop bc it feels almost. beautiful. like. the whole ground just #woosh! out from under you. and shit is like grey's anatomy. i'm looking up at her grey eyes #she's old she wears this nice shawl she's like got Cool Lesbian vibes and people are sprinting into the room #from other parts of the clinic unrelated to me. while the monitor is like a little aria singing #and shes like hey youre okay stay awake stay with me something went wrong we have to keep trying #and i remember thinking - i was trying to think of nice things. i have so many beautiful places that now overlap #with this terrible memory #i became dimly aware that there was too much on her wrists and hands. like #that was too many liters #and then when they had finished all this. i packed up and drove myself home #i have had (bad thing) happen to me. and the same feeling happened after #that numb almost lamblike bleating. you cry without noise. like. ur body is so shocked and ur mind so empty #you just stare at the road and everything everything is happening behind glass and static and you are standing so far away from it #while you hold ur hands at 10 and 2. and something in ur brain is SCREAMING at you - IT WAS BAD AND IT SHOULDNT HAVE HAPPENED #and ur just watching the alarms in your body going off and youre thinking. a little pinch! ha. i think i just lost something important.

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ineed-to-sleep · 4 months

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So I've had this wip sitting in my folders for months now and decided to ressurect it to satiate the urge to draw these two again

#I actually finished a wip after abandoning it for so long alright iconic moment for me personally #this is them in the cab coming back from the warrens after getting their asses handed to them by all the szlachta #she handled herself a lil better but vincent is squishy and almost died like. 10 times #vtm #vtmb #the fledgling #brujah #oc.vince #oc.pepper #ship: viper #sleepyscribble #she looks a lil sad bc yk she nearly lost the dude and she starts realizing she liiikes hiiiiiim teehee #she legit doesn't know what she would do if she rlly lost him #but she doesn't think she's in love ofc ofc it's just that yk he's the only person she really feels like she can trust #and the only one she feels really good around and who she feels she could tell anything to #and tbh she hasn't felt this way with anyone else in a long long time even before she became undead and had to deal w the other kindred #but that's normal for a friendship yk this is just a really strong friendship why ruin it with romance right that's stupid #no she wasn't watching him take his shirt off with her eyes almost popping out of her skull the other day shhh that didn't happen #she doesn't even remember he has freckles on his back and a scar on his shoulder. the left one. she doesn't remember she wasn't even lookin #ANYWAY no lust no feelings she's fine don't worry abt it 👍🏻#viper art

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zukosdualdao · 2 months

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i'm literally insane about the last agni kai and the lightning scene(s). i swear i've rewatched it 10+ times since my last rewatch of the show (which was my first watch in years) and like. azula sees katara come into view from behind. zuko doesn't. he follows azula's gaze and sees katara and is immediately horrified. he doesn't even think or hesitate because he doesn't have time and for once he doesn't have to look back at azula to figure out what she's doing because he knows what she's doing and he won't let it happen. time dwindling into slow motion as a haunting score plays? and zuko literally yelling out "no!" because that lightning absolutely cannot hit katara. as soon as he sees it there's no chance of that ever happening. and then katara watching in horror as the lightning flashes against features in what is probably one of the most hauntingly beautiful animated moments of the show? zuko hitting the ground still convulsing with lightning and katara crying out "zuko!" and immediately trying to run to him before azula attacks again? and the next scene we cut back to with them, zuko is groaning weakly and trying to lift himself up, and we see katara literally gasp in surprise as she realizes he's still alive (i'm sobbing because i do quite literally think she thought he was dead) and immediately tries to run to him again, nevermind that she knows azula is still there, and the hand katara uses for healing is already doused in water as she reaches for him. but then azula starts attacking again. and zuko, despite literally being in so much pain that he can't stand and can barely even move at all without whimpering, still tries to reach for the spot where he can see azula attacking katara. katara is forced to hide from azula's attacks. and as azula is mocking "zuzu, you don't look so good" down to zuko, the perspective shot is such that you can SEE that katara is also looking at where he lies prone in the distance, surrounded by flame (probably wondering how much time they have before it really is too late) before looking back up at azula and realizing she needs to defeat her as quickly and handily as possible so katara can get to zuko. obviously katara would have done this anyway (the whole reason they were THERE was to halt the continued cycle of the imperialist regime of the fire nation), but the scene is specifically framed as katara trying to figure out how to stop azula so the obstacle to her getting to zuko is no longer in the way. katara's defeat of azula was epic and deserves its own post. but then after making sure azula is securely chained, she runs to zuko, looks at him with such immense sadness and horror and fear as she hears him in so much pain, tenderly turns him over so she can get a good look at the wound. and she cups his head? briefly but so gently? so that he won't hit it as she turns him over? and when she tries to heal him you can tell she is so genuinely unsure if it will even work, and so relieved that she starts crying tears of joy when she sees it has (at least enough to keep him alive and somewhat lessen his pain.) they thank each other (and you can tell it's still really hard for zuko to talk and his eyes are barely open but he thanks her anyways i'm.) and she thanks him back and!!! when he starts to try to sit up she makes a little surprised face and then immediately helps him to do so (and puts a tender hand to his chest while she does!!!) and obviously that last shot of them standing together is also one of emotional support, but katara's hand on his back is also partly because i still think (and certainly katara still thinks) trying to walk/stand on his own would be a bad idea, so it's definitely not happening.

#y'all. let me tell you right now. there was a way to write and animate this scene that didn't play on a dozen romantically coded tropes #and this. uh. wasn't that!#zutara #i know this is basically just reciting what happened ( i almost included the actual way katara defeats azula but that wasn't the point of t #is particular post and also would have made it even longer.)#but #there is nothing about this sequence of events that does not make me feel like i am on drugs.#also you Know zuko immediately after this was like: alright well i guess i've got shit to do! then promptly falls unconscious again. tbh #the joke is on him if he thinks katara is letting him out of sight for a While #atla #zuko #katara #this isn't even particularly analytical i'm just gushing #i'm not joking i will never be over it.#the last agni kai #sozin's comet

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royalarchivist · 4 months

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Pac: I wish I had a really nice background story for my- why I'm here. But you know, Felps just crashed the ship and I'm stuck! Fit: You've got an interesting history though, Pac! I mean, look at you escaping that prison! Like, that was not easy for you to do. [...] You've told me lots of stories about yourself and Mike's adventures. You've got a very interesting backstory. Pac: Thank you Fit, thank you. I'm glad to hear that you think it's cool. Fit: I mean– the cannibalism part, that sucks, but it is– It's cool! It's cool.

People keep wondering when Pac's going to tell Fit how he lost his leg, but during their date last week, Fit implied that their characters already had this discussion! Although this could've been an OOC part of their conversation, they've referenced this specific part of Pac's lore in past streams (this is just the most explicit example we've had so far).

[ Full Subtitle Transcript ↓ ]

–

Pac: I wish I had a really nice- um, background story - background story for my- why I'm here. But you know, Felps just crashed the ship and I'm stuck!

Fit: [Chuckles] Well no- you've got an interesting history though, Pac! I mean, look at you escaping that prison! Like, that was not easy for you to do.

Pac: ...No, yeah, you're right.

Fit: You know, and you've been- you have- you've told me lots of stories about yourself and Mike's adventures, like– You've got a very interesting backstory.

Pac: Thank you Fit, thank you. I'm glad to hear that you think it's cool.

Fit: I mean, I mean– the cannibalism part, I mean, that sucks, yeah, but it is– It's cool! It's cool.

Pac: Yeah, right? Yeah- that's- that's not a good part, right? Yeah, I- ugh, yeah, it's a– [He takes a deep breath] Yeah. It's ok.

Fit: Y-yeah, yeah...

Pac: It's ok.

#Hideduo #Pactw #FitMC #QSMP #FitPac #January 9 2024 #I was like ''???'' when I didn't see anyone else talking about this but tbf a LOT happened that day #So this is just me dusting dirt off this gem of lore and polishing it before presenting it to the community for re-inspection #<- can you tell I'm writing this in the early AMs #I'm falling asleep at my desk #Q #Anyways. Fit is so lucky Pac's got... interesting taste in men #''Cool trauma bro!'' are you INSANE #I can't remember how chat reacted but I was screaming #lmfaooo #Pac and Fit are so awkward and I find that hopelessly charming #Even if it makes me want to hide my face in my hands and scream #frickin. ''cool trauma bro'' FitMC you're so lucky he loves you #ALSO has anyone else noticed Pac almost always looks down at his leg whenever they bring up the topic of what happened to him in prison?#It's such a small little character trait but I LOVE it #The attention to detail!!! I love it!!!!#Pac's such a good roleplayer

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mayasdeluca · 3 hours

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MAYA AND CARINA STATION 19: 7x10 'One Last Time'

#station 19 #station19edit #station 19 spoilers #carina x maya #carina deluca #maya bishop #mine #i liked this scene and the kiss and everything #and we did get a glimpse of carina saying she was worried #but how does she not find out just how close maya was to dying??#and maya expressing how scared she was almost losing everything??#like that was such a missed opportunity IMO #and having them both at the same scene again only to not interact...like why?#its crazy to me how maya was just fine after what she went through but then andy collapsed and we didn't even see what happened to her prio #such a missed opportunity to not have carina work on maya and have her more injured later on but...story of this show's life i suppose #no sense in staying angry now when it's all over #this scene was very them and i'm glad about that

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ride-a-dromedary · 8 months

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You're not a doppelganger, are you? Trying to study me, learn all my secrets so you can take my place?

#Baldur's Gate 3 #bg3edit #bg3 spoilers #Halsin #otheredits #blood tw #what would even be the tw tag for this? implied child endangerment? (that didn't happen)?#imprisonment tw #doppelganger tw #my stuff #hey you wanna see something that makes me really sad - there you go - yes i spent several hours on this what of it #hey fanficcers - I need someone to write a halsin centric thing with the line 'I do not deserve to see the sun again' crossing his mind #whether that be from his time with the drow or after the shadow curse - please i need #orin's imitations of the companions she kidnaps are always slightly off (obviously) but the gal uses the *exact right pressure points*#where it's like...it almost feels as if we get a peek into the reality of their thoughts #is it SUPPOSED to come off that way? no clue - but that's how i read it #that bit about the shadow curse applies in my mind because as is based in implication #halsin had to leave the wounded behind while he rescued survivors - you don't think those screams echo in his head #every single night?#and halsin not thinking he deserves seeing the sun? because of all the godforsaken things *he* was the one left from that tragedy?#yeah #also what in the dragon age origins is the lighting of this scene #was gonna make another gifset but this took me four hours lol

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cryptiduni · 11 months

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“white mourning.”

#‘‘A white mourning. A modern death. Divorce or something similar. All you can do is put more distance between you & him. make him smaller.’’#jean is a very easy character to hate if you know nothing about him. & you know what they say. easy target doesn’t make for a good practice #judit literally compares harry to intellectually disabled man yet you don’t see ppl hating her because she is outwardly nice.#she’s polite yes but she doesn’t care as much as jean cares for harry #he is not perfect. he is mean. but loyal. if he truly didn't care he wouldn't hab come back to martinaise & coulda just reported harry’s as #he put up with du bois’ bullshit for years and built a toxic (totally straight) relationship with him yet always comes back.#he says he will leave you in the village to die but please understand harry isn't exactly a great person. especially pre-bender hdb.#planned a make up joke & put on a wig for hdb even tho he wasn’t the who started the whole fiasco #you can hate him all you want for leaving harry before & during tribunal but how could he have foreseen all this bullshit would have happen #his second leaving is kinda bullshit writing but #jv is dealing with his own demons too. clinical depression. partner almost died. job is shit. case spiraling out control #i do not blame the DE staff either. sometimes shit just happens. not everything needs a grand explanation.#but it definitely coulda been handled better. but i understand. resources were sparse.#i relate to jv. as someone with temper issues & attention problems i have to remove myself from the scene or i'll say shit i'd regret late #my man is having the worst week of his life. leave him alone.#kim is great but have u heard of a man who thinks he's old when he is only 30 & luvs horses & his commie boyfriend that he's divorcin' soon #disco elysium #de fanart #jean vicquemare #disco elysium fanart #jean heron vicquemare #jean posting #illustration #de #artists on tumblr #my art #I WANTED TO DRAW THIS FOR MONTHSSS YOU COULDN'T IMAGINE. HE LITERALLY HAUNTED ME IN MY SLEEP!!!#i love him normal amount. very healthy. much feelings #my little maiu maiu

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drinkingdeadpeopletea · 2 months

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man not to read too much into spahr's "there was a reason i picked him" about phineas but. i am always keeping in mind that spahr pulled phineas out of the delta personally. he didn't meet phineas as a prospective adsecla he met him as a scared little kid! maybe it wasn't so much that spahr actually thought phineas was the best choice as that he really wanted to believe he was. maybe without even being aware of it! how could he not want to believe in the rags to riches of it all? something that started with that scared little kid HE was able to help save? a tangible representation--beyond valor--of something good he did? but now of course that whole narrative has crumbled around him! phineas did something horrible (that was all spahr's fault as far as he's concerned) and now phineas is dead! that's it! story over! :)

#man i can't wait for him to see phineas again. i hope phineas is ACTIVELY in the middle of some traitorous activity when it happens.#or actively falling through a field of mica i'd settle for that too!#this whole post was almost in the tags of my last reblog but then i came to my senses and realized i should spare op and make my own.#midst #midst podcast #midst spoilers #midst podcast spoilers #i think there's also something to be said for phineas's desperation and drive being a quality spahr might have seen as an asset #that fire that propelled him to try so hard the entire time! something that spahr seems to relate to and so probably thought #would make phineas an even better adsecla! worked for jonas didn't it? :)))))))

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oblonger · 1 month

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Chapter 8 of TPiaG: Body Swap AU

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@sincerely-sofie I think this is my favorite chapter I've written so far!

Twig is unconscious

Darkrai couldn't sleep.

As ironic as that sentence is, it's nonetheless true.

He'd long since gotten used to the needs that Twig's body demands for. And he would be lying if he didn't say he, to some extent, enjoyed being able to fall asleep.

But for the last week, he couldn't fall sleep for the life of him.

He tossed and turned in his bed, trying every position he could think of.

He attempted to sleep curled up, splayed out, on his belly, his side, his back. With his blanket, without his blanket (A grave mistake).

Nothing worked.

And he hated so much that he knew why.

He couldn't stop thinking of Twig.

That loathsome wretch that took his body.

He couldn't understand why he can't stop thinking of her.

He hated her.

He hated how scared and helpless he felt seeing that passage open.

He hated how he wasn't as angry as he wanted to be when she picked him up without his consent.

He can't stop thinking of how she broke the shelves in that closet to fit both of them in there, even though she could have easily just stuffed him in there alone.

He hated so much that he felt safe in there with her.

He hated the way his breath caught on itself when she pulled him closer, after hearing Grovyle step past.

He hated how he felt like he'd been torn in half when Grovyle ripped her out of there.

He hated how frozen in terror he was as he watched Grovyle beat her within an inch of her life.

He hated how he felt utterly useless, watching Celebi, Dusknoir and Kip do everything they could to keep her from dying...

...

Darkrai's eyes widened as a thought came to his mind.

She may not have been attacked if she had just left him.

She might not be unconscious in the hospital, straddling the line between life and death, if she had simply hidden herself in the shadows, and left him to confront Grovyle.

She wasn't hiding herself from Grovyle.

She was protecting him...

...

Darkrai slowly curled his fists, leaving scratch marks in the floor.

No.

That wasn't what she was doing.

She hated him as much as he hated her.

It was in her best interest to keep her own body alive.

Then why didn't she hide you in the closet alone, and try speaking with Grovyle

Because Grovyle would have attacked her regardless.

Then she would have hidden herself in the shadows and tried conversing with him.

Did you not see the murderous rampage Grovyle was on?! He wouldn't have listened to her.

What about the code word?

Darkrai's heart skipped a beat.

She would have had a chance to say it had she not tried to keep you safe.

She... She had a chance to say it during their fight. She'd forgotten she had that word in mind.

Would she have forgotten if he didn't claim that her voice was a trick? Would she have forgotten if she had a chance to talk with Grovyle? Would she have forgotten if she only dodged, and didn't try to fight back?

Grovyle wouldn't have believed her if she did say the word.

Kip didn't believe her until she said the word to him. And he had more of a reason to doubt the legitimacy.

Darkrai pressed his claws into his arms.

Stop.

If she had shown you to him, and explained what had happened, what do you think Grovyle would have done?

Darkrai winced from the pain he was inflicting on himself, attempting to hold back tears.

Stop it!

Grovyle would not have hesitated to try and kill you.

STOP!

He would blame you, as he does now, for stealing her body.

Blood was starting to pool where his claws pierced his skin.

Do you not recall her expression, when she apologized for what she said to you that morning? And the promise she made to find something for you to do during the day?

ENOUGH! I WILL NOT TOLERATE MY OWN MIND BELITTLING ME LIKE THIS!!!

She cares about you.

...

Darkrai quietly cried in his bed. Trying to remain as silent as possible so the others couldn't hear him.

Why?

...

Silence.

**********

Grovyle lay flat on his back in Kip's bed, ironically getting less sleep than he did than for the few weeks he was technically homeless. Forced to stay in that position so his ribs would heal correctly. Tears flow down his face as he thought about Twig.

The fear in her eyes, as a human, a Charmander, and in Darkrai's body haunted him.

The feeling of satisfaction he felt, watching her bleed before he knew who she was, made him consider leaving to enter Labyrinth Cave alone.

Grovyle intentionally took deep breaths. Each one sending out sharp pain from his chest.

He can never see her again. His presence would force her to relive what he'd done to her.

He tried to kill her.

He forced her through intense agony to make her suffer.

He traumatized her.

She should hate him.

She should hate him the way he hates himself, with every fiber of her being...

He hopes she does.

*********

Dusknoir couldn't take any comfort in the literature he used to. Despite Celebi's and the doctors' best efforts, the damage done to his eye is permanent. Everything looks like he'd been submerged underwater. His age already made his eyesight worse, but now he'll have to learn Braille to read again.

But he wasn't worried about that.

He was more worried about Kip.

He was of course worried about Twig. Praying at every moment that she would recover, but his fears still lay in seeing Kip neglect himself to watch Twig at all times.

The fact that the last thing he could, and probably will ever see clearly, was Kip's expression of terror, the same he'd seen several years ago, filled him with a pain that was much greater than what Kip had afflicted him with.

Dusknoir wondered if all of this would have been avoided if he was never given his undeserved mercy.

He saw the way Kip shook when he exited the passage of time.

Twig wouldn't be on the cusp of death, and Kip would be happy if he was simply never brought back.

********

Celebi couldn't understand how Darkrai isn't exhausted all the time with how he's constantly angry.

She's barely able to do anything but sit on the couch and think of just how much of a brain-dead idiot she is.

If she had just looked forward when they figured out that Kip and Twig had moved, then she could have stopped any of this from happening.

But NOOOOO!~ She just HAD to wait and see what would happen! She just HAD to be surprised by how things would turn out!

And now she hurt everyone and Twig might die.

Sure, they managed to get her to the hospital, and yeah, She's at least stable.

But what happens if her body gives out?

She dies.

And it'd be her fault if she does.

Celebi doesn't even want to think about what Kip and Grovyle would do if she passes.

She's completely trapped in a prison of her own design.

She hates that she didn't look forward then, and she hates how scared she is to look forward now.

She hates how angry she feels towards Kip for hurting Dusknoir like that. Even though she knows it was a knee-jerk reaction.

She hates how angry she is at Grovyle, for letting himself get to the point where all logic and reasoning went out the window. Even though she knows he was just tired and furious and paranoid.

But she doesn't hate how angry she is at herself.

There isn't a justification for her actions.

She is just stupid.

*********

Kip didn't care that sleeping next to her gave him nightmares. He couldn't care less that the pendant she wore with the lunar feather was lost during her fight.

The fear he feels in those nightmares pales in comparison to the fear he feels at every waking second.

Every morning he jolts awake, covered in cold sweat from the nightmare he had, and stares at Twig. Watching her to make sure she's still breathing.

He hasn't left the room since he was allowed in after the emergency surgery the Doctors had to preform on her.

He watches the doctors replace the medicine and bandages daily. Staring at her wounds to make sure they haven't gotten infected. Even if that's not his job.

Kip just-

He was so mad at himself.

He wanted to make up for abandoning Twig when she needed him most. But he can't.

And he might not ever be able to.

What a moron he is. He can't figure out why he started running in the first place.

They were his friends. They wouldn't hurt him or Twig.

But Grovyle ended up nearly killing her anyway. All because he wasn't there to defend her. To explain what had happened.

Kip stared at Twig.

First time she's slept since switching bodies, and it was because of him.

Kip stood up and heavily, slowly walked towards the door.

He turned his head to look back at her. Hoping she'd woken up.

She didn't. She lay in the same position. Her breathing, weak and short.

...

Team Skull was right about him

They were more right than Twig ever was.

All he ever did was weigh her down. He was a burden that he forced her to carry.

She had lied to him. He wasn't her friend. Friends don't abandon each other when they need them most.

Friends don't suddenly change their minds and try to go back for them for no reason.

Friends don't break down crying, unable to do anything while trying to put medicine on their wounds.

Friends don't act like him.

Kip left the room and slowly walked out of the hospital towards the travel agency. His head hung low.

He could feel the atmosphere get less heavy with each step, but he himself still felt heavy.

He's going... Somewhere. He doesn't know where. Just, any other town.

She doesn't deserve a scumbag 'friend' like him.

It's better this way...

*******

Celebi had told her everything.

She couldn't help but notice the underlying anger in her words. Everything recounted to her with an uncharacteristic flatness. Simply laying out the facts and nothing more.

She took a slight amusement as she thought about how Twig must have looked at Grovyle, when he saw her clutching that monster like some scared child holding a stuffed toy.

It was exactly what she deserved to have happen after she gave pity to that wretched, selfish thing.

At least justice was finally served.

Maybe now she'll take a step back and realize her actions and words were in no way justified.

Maybe she'll finally see just how awful he acted. And finally take the steps to right what's wrong.

Cresselia stopped her midnight flight when she suddenly realized that someone experiencing great physical and emotional pain. Barely detectable, as it was far away. All the way over on the Fire continent.

Cresselia decided to shelve the thoughts as she began making her way over to where the pain was originating.

She thinks it may be coming from a Snivy but she isn't quite sure yet.

Cresselia enjoyed the feeling of the crisp, early spring night breeze against her feathers.

Perhaps her and Kip will finally see eye-to-eye when she returns.

#Boy. I wonder if that Snivy will have any significant impact on Cresselia's mindset and behavior.#Man trying to get Cresselia to act like a chunk of hairy dust filled play-dough without crossing over into cartoonish evil is hard #I can't say her portion is my favorite part #But i love the rest of it #I didn't want to say it in each portion because i would have just been repeating myself #but i wanted to emphasize how everyone feels like it's their fault; and their fault /alone/ that what happened; happened.#even though it was such a complex thing with so much trauma and paranoia involved on every side #that picking someone to solely blame would be pointless #the closest i could get to is Grovyle #but even then #dude thought that the only family he had for years had been getting tortured by a legend for almost a full year #couple that with what little sleep he got leading up to the incident #and the growing paranoia and anger each time they went to a house and couldn't find her #i can't really say i can blame him #I would act irrationally angry and paranoid too if i was in a similar situation.#granted; It is an explanation. Not an excuse #Can't wait to explore the implications of that!#Bullying the grass boy #text post #pmd eos #fanfic of a fanfic #the present is a gift au #pmd #writing #fanfic #body swap au #pmd2 #cw blood #tw blood #Dusknoir and Grovyle's sections are shorter than i'd like but their thoughts are the most straightforward so oh well.

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nightswatchdisbandmentera · 1 month

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Something rubbed against his leg beneath the table. Jon saw red eyes staring up at him. “Hungry again?” he asked. There was still half a honeyed chicken in the center of the table. Jon reached out to tear off a leg, then had a better idea. He knifed the bird whole and let the carcass slide to the floor between his legs. Ghost ripped into it in savage silence. His brothers and sisters had not been permitted to bring their wolves to the banquet, but there were more curs than Jon could count at this end of the hall, and no one had said a word about his pup. He told himself he was fortunate in that too. His eyes stung. Jon rubbed at them savagely, cursing the smoke. He swallowed another gulp of wine and watched his direwolf devour the chicken. Dogs moved between the tables, trailing after the serving girls. One of them, a black mongrel bitch with long yellow eyes, caught a scent of the chicken. She stopped and edged under the bench to get a share. Jon watched the confrontation. The bitch growled low in her throat and moved closer. Ghost looked up, silent, and fixed the dog with those hot red eyes. The bitch snapped an angry challenge. She was three times the size of the direwolf pup. Ghost did not move. He stood over his prize and opened his mouth, baring his fangs. The bitch tensed, barked again, then thought better of this fight. She turned and slunk away, with one last defiant snap to save her pride. Ghost went back to his meal. Jon grinned and reached under the table to ruffle the shaggy white fur. The direwolf looked up at him, nipped gently at his hand, then went back to eating.

Jon I, AGOT

It's interesting that GRRM would dedicate several paragraphs to a seemingly unimportant exchange between a boy, his wolf, and an unfriendly third party. But there's just something about this passage that has continued to nag at me for years since I first read it because, considering how heavy handed GRRM was with the foreshadowing in AGOT, this feels important.

Jon is sitting at table full of squires - aka would be knights. We don't really know who they are or what families they belong to, but it's safe to assume that they come from a certain level of privilege; this is considering the fact that it cannot be financially easy to be a squire. And these boys already have a slew of tales detailing all their previous knightly exploits regarding "battle and bedding and the hunt" which suggests that they have some capital. So you have boys who will soon be men. And they will, presumably, become men of some power.

These lads eat their fill of the chicken until only half remains, which Jon then gives to Ghost. The direwolf's name is not so important here but what he represents is. Throughout the series, we're told that Ghost is reminiscent of the weirwood trees (because of his red eyes and white fur). He's stated to be of and from the Old Gods and since he's a personification of the weirwoods, he might as well be one of them. It's almost as if Jon is presenting whatever is left on the table to the Old Gods (Ghost). He lets them devour his offerings while he silently watches. And the motif of watching is so interesting here because it's kind of like Jon takes on a stewardship role - to watch over land/people/etc. He oversees Ghost eating the chicken, so he's overseeing whatever has been given to the Old Gods. This is not new imagery to his arc. As a brother of the Night's Watch and eventually its leader, we have several instances where he leads people to adopting the Old Gods in some fashion. In ADWD, several recruits swear their vows to the Old Gods while he watches on as their Lord Commander. The Old Gods are also primarily of the North and we're told that Jon has more of the north in him than his brothers; interesting that this also includes Bran. So perhaps whatever is being offered to the Old Gods relates to the North.

We must also note that Jon initially thinks to give only a small portion, a leg, before pivoting and providing the entire thing. It feels to me a bit like the process of carving up a kingdom or something similar. The lords (represented by the squires) take what they want and leave aside what they don't; or perhaps they have eaten to their fill and can take no more. Then when his time comes, Jon first considers a small piece of land/group of people before eventually absorbing all of whatever is left behind. The concept of carving up a kingdom rings harder considering that we have several callbacks to the ideals of kingship in this chapter. Robert, Jaime, Tyrion, and even Mance though we don't know it yet, all play into this. And then there's the aspect of Jon letting the chicken slip between his legs which evokes birth/fatherhood, a very curious choice when GRRM could've just had Jon place the chicken on the floor. So land/people are carved up and Jon then uses whatever is left to birth his own type of kingdom. And this kingdom is one for the Old Gods.

This also touches on something that has been quite prevalent throughout Jon's arc. It's the concept of accepting the "others" or "those left over" who live apart from the accepted social norms. Arya (a tomboy), Sam (a gender non-confirming boy), the Night's Watch (criminals, extra sons, and men who have no future left or place to go), and even the wildlings are all examples of this. And Jon takes on a leadership/paternal role to every single one of them. He looks after them as a leader would/should. Sometimes, in the case of Arya and the wildlings, he's equated to a king. He's a steward/shepherd/king. There's messianic undertones to this:

Come unto me, all you who are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:28-30).

If you're familiar with Judeo-Christian tradition, you'll know that Jesus is often personified as one who spent the majority his time among the outcasts. The idea is that he came to save them too and that anew kingdom (or new earth depending on your translation) would spring up after the end of the world where he would forever rule as king; which presents the idea of a final king after the earthly ones are done away with. Now GRRM isn't so heavy handed with Christian allusions as other authors out there, but he does have a Catholic background and Jon is so overtly a Jesus figure. And in Revelation, Jesus is king and god at the very end....

One last thing: the mention of the mongrel who challenges Jon has always been rather interesting but confusing to me. A mongrel doesn't really relate to one specific type of dog. But it's interesting that Jon notes several roaming about where he is. They follow the serving girls who carry the food to be offered. Mongrels are used to describe antagonist/villainous groups in ASOIAF. Sometimes, they're used to describe slavers in Essos. But what's interesting is that most of the time, they're used to describe Euron's Ironborn especially in Victorian's POV. So I don't think the mongrel who challenges Ghost is a supernatural threat of death (i.e., the Others) but rather a human one. They represent those who are called to the scene once the lords have finished playing their games. It almost feels like a feast for (carrion) crows....

But it doesn't really matter because this mongrel isn't much of a challenge for Ghost. Though the mongrel is much larger, the direwolf is able to fend her off very effortlessly. Given that "mongrel" is used to describe Ironborn raiders, could this exchange between Ghost and the mongrel point to reavers or sea raiders who rise and fail challenge Jon kingdom? There is a historical King Jon Stark who did this....

When sea raiders landed in the east, Jon drove them out and built a castle, the Wolf's Den, at the mouth of the White Knife, so as to be able to defend the mouth of the river.[1][2] His son, Rickard, followed him on the throne and annexed the Neck to the north.

ref.

So this might shed some light not only on Jon's already published arc, but also on what we can expect in the future. We have some foreshadowing through Jon's ADWD dream that he will not only rise with the dawn (thereby live through the Long Night), but will be in a position to lead people (wildings in that chapter) to a new peace after a hard fought war. Also remember that the wildlings, rather enthusiastically, swear oaths to him as if swearing oaths to their king. In this instance, the supernatural (a dream of the war for the dawn) is followed by the natural/human. So perhaps this particular passage (and Jon's dream) can be used to predict that Jon comes out on top, and quite effortlessly too, as a leader. And he becomes a leader who rules by association with the Old Gods; or rules a kingdom for them.

To end, I think it's of note that this passage immediately precedes Jon's conversation with Benjen where he voices his desire to go out on his own - the hero's call to action. This is the adventure that's going to kickstart his growth as a man, warrior and most importantly, a leader. So it looks like before we even began, GRRM telegraphed how it would all end in just three short paragraphs.

#jon snow #asoiaf #valyrianscrolls #ghost the direwolf #some random extra thoughts:#the aspect of fatherhood is closely tied to kingship as kings are often regarded to be the fathers of their nations #so we might see a parallel where jon-like dany-doesn't have children of his own physical body #but rather rules a kingdom as its symbolic father #think of how odin-a mythical parallel for jon-is called the all father because he is father to all men/lands #also it's interesting to me how kingship is a theme but it's almost like the actual theme is that of kings coming of going #but jon remaining and prevailing above all #we have robert who is a disappointing/bad king and his rule doesn't last very long and neither will his dynasty #jaime looks like a king and even if grrm didn't go through with his original ideas he was never meant to rule for long #in the new story jaime is symbolic of rhaegar a would be king whose time comes and goes leaving jon to pick up the pieces #then tyrion who stands “as tall as a king” but not quite! he still is not as tall as jon and tyrion also says in a later chapter #that soon he'll be even shorter than ghost + tyrion wasn't hand for long #mance who is hidden also has his time as king but it's very short lived and jon later absorbs his kingdom to make his own #so we have the wolf devouring the “left behinds” in a way but the interesting thing is this happens in reverse doesn't it #might Jon's new kingdom not only be made of remnants of the nw and wildlings but also have those left behind from the rest of the 7k?#it's possible since jojen tells us that once night comes all cloaks become black 🙂#so yeah this is all just more jon endgame king of winter/a new north propaganda lmaoooo

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icewindandboringhorror · 5 months

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Some (late) holiday photos of the boye~!

#cats #holiday #OUGHH....... barely could even get these edited and posted... my mysterious sickness flare up has been sooo bad the past few #days.. I didn't even go to the usual obligatory family christmas I was supposed to attend (!!! health issue/medical mention in tags below)#My stomach issues basically put me in a constant state of uncontrollable shivering/body shaking + nausea + sometimes rapid heart #rate. and when it happens at night that makes it like.. nearly impossible to sleep when you're violently shaking + you can feel your heart #so strong + you keep having to run to the bathroom every 5 minute to cough and gag #and throw up and so on and so forth. etc. So I went like 40 hours without any sleep almost for christmas eve and all of christmas day #last night I finally got maybe 2 hours of sleep in between the nausea and shaking and stuff. and then today I was able to get a few #hours of sleep in the afternoon. Today I tried taking an anxiety mediciation a doctor gave me in case it was anxiety related (it's apparent #ly used to relax people and works in the moment. rather than like Anxiety Mediciation that you have to take for weeks to see any effect #because I think this isn't actually acting on your brain chemistry it's judt like..a mild sedative or something.) but all that did was make #me dizzy and sweaty lol. I;m glad I slept a little but I'm just still frustrated that I don't feel normal. I started having these #'episodes' (with the stomach issues + shaking + heartrate + nausea etc.) like at the end of october. And usually it will happen for like a #few hours at a time. or i'll lose sleep one day and then be fine the next. but this has been like nearly 3 days of feeling weird. so is #getting kind of annoying... It's funny too because I was so so productive like.. literally the few days before. I was feeling much better #and I was working on my game and blah blah. But then.. random issue flare up out of nowhere of course.. yaayy.... happy holidays to meee lo #I did at least see two random ducks outside of my window in the yard area for christmas. and havent seen them since. So it's like.. hrmm..#pacing around my room nauseous and shakings and etc. but at least... hello.. two little ducks placed there just for me :3c #Now I get anxiety every night which I'm sure doesn't help/could exacerbate whatever underlying genuinely physical issues exist. But after #like 2 nights of 'I spend the night sleepless and incredibly uncomfortable just sitting in the dark sick' then bedtime is like.. dread...#I even was trying slapping myself in the face in desperation to see if somehow that could shock my body out of whatever the hell it was #doing lol.. up at 3am holding ice cubes in my hand and hitting myself in the head and crying from exhaustion and thowing up.. literally #ridiculous cartoon character feeling... AAANYWAY!!! At least I have baby boy pictures. and I have lots of doctors appointments so hopefully #whatever the issue is can be sorted out at some point. I don't know much about ibs but hopefully maybe something like that that I could pos #ibly take medication for and not something more seirous or anything. Maybe there's a food I'm secretly intolerant to or whatever.#And I did at least post a sims holday video actually timed for the holidays so that's something. I havent been productive really latrely #though obviously.. I can't even play games or small tasks when in that state since I'm just SO physically uncomfortable. Nausea and heart #stuff are THE hardest physical sensations to ignore.. BUT yeah... hoping I shall sleep at all tonight. hopeing to get like 3 productive #things done.. at some point... at least SOMETHING... lol..... *** *** ***

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specialized-rexan · 16 days

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SCREENSHOTS I GOT FROM THE JEREMY JORDAN LIVESTREAM YESTERDAY. especially love the comments on his duck drawings. he was very proud of some of them since he needed to practice before the stream. he admits he does not draw much lol

and here's Lucifer's signature that Jeremy came up with: a cursive capital L attached to a pentagram!

the stream was SO FUN and literally only felt like 20 minutes even tho it was almost an hour

at one point he mentioned he's making pancakes with olive oil now since he has high cholesterol, and that he LOVES how the pancakes turned out. someone responded:

(later someone joked he should make pancakes with bacon grease and he almost shouted (not angrily) "DO YOU WANT ME TO DIE? I JUST SAID I HAVE HIGH CHOLESTEROL. I just said. I had high cholesterol. Are you TRYING. To kill me."

anyway back to screenshots lol)

"Take that, depression!" was a popular quote to write on prints, and he said he hoped we're not depressed and it was very sweet

some more quotes written during the stream and other notes:

"I'm gonna be signing these prints of my boy Lucifer, the short king of Hell"

he drank both a cold smoothie and hot tea during the stream. "Doesn't make any goddamn sense, but here we go."

"It's never too late to fuck up--too late to fuck shit up" (a legitimate accidental stammer. but still perfect in its own way)

"Every time I hear the name 'Shay' I think of my daughter's friend at school. My daughter's obsessed with a friend named Shay. 'S all she talks about. 'Shay Shay Shay Shay Shay Shay.' Shay and Madeline. It's like 'You can be your own person. Clara. You are your own HUMAN.' …HAPPY BIRTHDAY, KATHERINE."

hopes to go to some conventions for Hazbin Hotel. more likely to go to cons in New York, New Jersey (where he lives), or Philly area

"He's just a li'l cutie. :3 Is he really da bosh? :3" (wondering if Lucifer really is the Big Boss of Hell Himself or if it's just more of a title)

"Hope you're not depressed"

" 'Write something Lucifer would say to cheer someone up.' And I think Lucifer would think that… 'SINGING MAKES EVERYTHING BETTER!' At least when it comes to rebuilding your relationship with your daughter."

"Guess what's in my smoothie. There are six ingredients. Go."

"…said draw a little duck, so I drew the smallest duck I could. (holds print up to camera then says in small high-pitched voice:) It's a little duck!"

MORE QUOTES UNDER THE CUT. THIS POST IS GETTING LONG ASFQJSKSKSKKS

_____

about his smoothie again: "Obviously, I just went to the gym. So I gotta have some kinda supplement in there. ... WHAT'S THE BASE, Y'ALL? YOU GOTTA HAVE A BASE." (someone could use that audio and give a character a bass guitar lol)

(still about people guessing smoothie ingredients:) "WATER? Why would I put water in my smoothie. (mutters:) Water is for losers. ... Kale! -grins and points at camera- That's it! You win. That's my smoothie."

his smoothie was blueberries, bananas, strawberries, protein powder, almond milk, kale

"…with a hUUGE shmiley faysh! :3" (about a little " =) " smile he wrote with an autograph)

"THAT DUCK IS CUTE!"

"We love, we stan Lilith"

AGGRESSIVELY, ABOUT A JOKE HE MADE: "GET IT?"

Some fatherly advice from Lucifer: "Don't fuck up your lives like I did 😎"

HE SANG THE START OF HELL'S GREATEST DAD AND WANTS A MIMZY-LESS VERSION THAT ACTUALLY HAS AN ENDING QSJFKSKKSKS

he's only seen Hazbin Hotel once, and he had "~champagne fountains, caviar mountains, that's just to staaart~" going through his head for the two+ years between recording his lines and the show airing. he wasn't able to tell anyone it because of non-disclosure stuff, and eventually he even forgot what that song line was from. but it still went through his head

"[Person he was signing an autograph for] is a bi girl [bisexual], and that's pretty baller"

"AN INCREDIBLE DUCK YOU SHALL HAVE"

"Take that depression!! Quack"

"Hold please!" (i just liked imagining Lucifer saying almost any small thing)

Jeremy Jordan says Lucifer is short, and not just that all the other characters are tall (i cannot confirm that that is canon even tho that's what i want LOL) "What gives!? There are short people in this world, and they need some love"

someone asked what he thinks about OC x canon ships. he was confused about what OC means and then when the chat explained, he was confused about how "OC x canon" works. but he figured it out after thinking for a moment. "So basically everybody wants to fuck Lucifer. GOT IT."

"Am I going to Hell for this" (about all the pentagrams he's drawing)

"…so i just did a bunch of stars and hearts around Emery's name 💜"

someone asked about his favorite Hazbin Hotel song, and he answered that season 2 has a rock song he really likes 👀 👀

"(a requested phrase for an autograph:) 'Duck lord loves you no matter what.' ...Don't know what that particularly means but…"

#jeremy jordan #hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar #hazbin lucifer #hazbin hotel lucifer #duckies #streamily #IF SOMEONE KNOWS WHO MADE THE 'TAKE THAT DEPRESSION' DUCK STICKER THAT JEREMY WORE AND THE SHIRT LMK.#THE ITEMS WERE BROUGHT UP A FEW TIMES AND I'D LIKE TO POINT FANS TO THEM IN CASE PEOPLE ARE INTERESTED.#IF SOMEONE NOTICES I GOT DETAILS WRONG LMK AND I'LL EDIT THE POST. I MAINLY WAS TAKING RAPID NOTES DURING THE STREAM AND #I MAKE MISTAKES SOMETIMES #also i felt i should say somewhere but didn't know where in the post that i am NOT depressed lol. but i hope my followers and #you other peeps are doing well!!!! <3 <3 #lucifer notable #<- FOR HIS SIGNATURE SQJFKSKSKSKS #AND ALL HIS DUCK DRAWING REFERENCES #OH LOL. I HAVE A MESSAGE OR TWO IN THE SCREENSHOTS. DON'T WORRY I INCLUDED A STREAMILY URL WHEN I FINISHED THAT FIRST COMMENT QSJKFSKSK #someone said they'll get one of the duck drawings tattooed or smth and that's a great idea honestly LOL #will reblog with a link to the saved Insta video since i don't want this post to get hidden in the tags. that happens right?#that's a thing if you link to non-tumblr sites i think. lame and dumb (and even frankly concerning) agh #oH. ALMOST FORGOT:#LUCIFER META AND HEADCANON #<- FOR HIS L + PENTAGRAM SIGNATURE. CANON FOR ME #heart-of-the-morningstar #<- for the video clips i linked

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fidgetspringer-art · 1 month

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✧ The Ardal stars ✧

#artists on tumblr #art #illustration #digital art #digital drawing #dnd #dungeons and dragons #homebrew #original art #my art #my ocs #Setting: Heim #I drew these a couple of years ago now i think #but since i'm drawing stuff for this setting again i'm reuploading with updated information cause the last one is outdated #I will say right off the bat however #If you compare my designs to already existing IPs i will block you on sight #the last time i posted these they got compared to a piece of media i really dislike #and that comment alone made me fall out of love with this setting for almost two years #so please. do not. it's rude and unnecessary #These are the artefacts my setting and its story is largely centered around #Tethry is credited with creating them (Even though he didn't)#They were gifted by Tethry to each of the largest cities in the world to serve as power generators supplying arcane power to the whole city #immediately pushing the four sister cities into prosperity and progress. leaving literally everyone else in the dust #which caused some understandable tension between countries that already had a bit of a strained relationship to begin with #There is SO MUCH to these little trinkets and their link to Tethry and how finding them essentially fucked up his whole entire life #You'd think becoming the world's most renowned arcanist would be the best thing that ever happened to an aspiring caster #but to some poor dude just trying to study arcane language. stumbling across the magical equivalent of the demon core #was very much not on his wishlist #especially not dealing with the consequences of trying to make sure no one actually realises how nasty they have the potential to be #which. someone inevitably does

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greenerteacups · 1 month

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What do you think as Hermione's career would be post battle of Hogwarts? To me her being minister for magic really doesn't make sense. She does not have patience or tact to wade through murky waters of politics 😭😭

So hard to say! The Trio are so, so young when we leave them, I find it almost impossible to project their futures farther than a few years out. The job that suited me at 17 would be radically unsuited to me now. That's why of all the Trio, Ron's ending strikes me as the most realistic — he jumps straight into the save-the-world business again, burns out, realizes he's actually Done The Fuck Enough, Thanks, and pivots into a low-stress career where he gets to see his family a lot. Feels accurate! The others are weirder to me because they do seem to just... pick a lane and stay there.

With Hermione, you could spin her a couple ways. You could say that she leans into her bookish side and does research or teaching, which is not my preference for a couple reasons (namely, I don't think Hermione would like academia as a profession; she finds her classwork interesting and enjoys intellectual validation, but she'd be stifled and wasted in a DPhil program, and she'd be infuriated by the administrative politicking of your average higher-ed faculty). You could say that she gets disaffected with politics and ends up as a barrister or a lobbyist of some kind, but if anything that requires more political finesse, because you don't actually have institutional power, you're just handling the people who make decisions and trying to persuade them of your goals. This is not Hermione's preferred method of influence. She's not even particularly good at persuasion, she just happens to be smart enough (and right often enough) that people take her ideas seriously.

Or you could say her brashness fades with the years into a softened flavor of tell-you-like-it-is honesty, which some politicians actually do successfully trade on; as we see in British politics today, you don't have to be all that charming or clever to get ahead, you just need to be really driven and well-connected (which Hermione completely is; she fought shoulder-to-shoulder with the first postwar Minister and her bestie, the Literal Messiah, runs the Auror Office.) But I don't know if Hermione especially wants to be Minister, after the war. She's just watched years of horrendous bureaucratic incompetence plunge the country into a violent civil conflict. She's had not one, but two Ministers of Magic try to bully or shame her friends into complicity with fascism. Her view of government is... likely extremely dark.

But Hermione also isn't the kind of person who sees her life as a quest for happiness. Babygirl has a savior complex that makes Harry look selfish. (She basically kills her parents — yeah, obliviating is a form of murder, #changemymind — "for their own good," and justifies every batshit, vindictive, mean-spirited move she ever pulls on the grounds that it "helps" one of her friends.) She is a mean, lean, dragon-slaying machine, and she needs a dragon. After Voldemort, the Ministry is the no. 1 threat to muggle-borns and non-wizarding Beings. As a war heroine with basically infinite political capital, I'd be surprised if she didn't try to do something there. That said, Hermione is so vivacious and dynamic that she could potentially grow in a hundred different directions; it's possible that all of this, while true of her at 18, becomes completely inaccurate by 22. That's why I'm not too fussed about any particular fanon interpretation.

#greenteacup asks #sidebar: I know Minister “of” Magic is an Americanism but mea culpa #Someday I might actually bite it and pay someone to britpick Lionheart but I can't do it now #because I have a ban on editing published fic unless it's finished. Otherwise I'll never get around to writing the actual ending #I have a Process #is it the best process? likely not! but it makes the words go. so here we are.#I also think the fact that JKR is Gen X makes a difference here. careers worked differently in the 80s and 90s than they do now #i.e. we have the gig economy and a lot more mobility and EXPECTATION of mobility in your early life #that means career changes & professional pivots through your 20s and 30s are increasingly normal #and in fact have always been normal — but the image of the 'true' or 'ideal' career has changed #so we look at those careers and go hm. really? none of them changed?#none of them even went to uni? do wizards... just not?#but again. I believe the epilogue was written almost completely without consideration as to what happened between the BOH and then #I really believe that JKR did not know what happened to Harry except a wedding and 3 kids. because that was the whole point #I don't think she even knew what his career was when she wrote that scene #It existed to marry everyone off and do a quick munchkin headcount #because of the understandable temptation as an author to keep your hand on the wheel. but it didn't even matter!#the epilogue changed NOTHING! it was the most useless chapter in the series! I just — GOD #you can absolutely accuse me of being sour grapes about my ships getting nixed. I AM sour grapes. I AM a hater.#AND I have plot/theme/craft reasons for disliking it.#I'm not objective. I just want credit for being a sophisticated hater. my grapes may be sour but they're still artisinal.

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