#the non-problematic ones are bi too obviously
Note
I do think a lot of the problem and the reason that more people (like the ones who seem to think that "top/bottom as myers-briggs personality types" jokes are exclusively coming from female-centric fandom spaces rather than gay male offline culture - which, btw, ignores that a whole bunch if not most female fanfic writers are themselves queer and there's a similar set of jokes and stereotypes in the lesbian community, but I digress) don't seem to understand what offline queer culture is like on here is that way too many of the people setting the tone for this in The Discourse on Tumblr are very young people who are newly out. In particular, a huge amount of the gay men on here who are telling people how very Problematic this is (when they're getting it from gay men and not circular discourse among other women in fandom who are claiming to speak on gay men's behalf) is coming from young gay men who don't have much of a community offline, and especially young gay trans men who often aren't yet presenting as male outside of the Internet. It's really hard to talk about, because it so easily risks saying those people's identities aren't valid - and like, we've seen TERFs weaponize that discourse to suggest that gay trans men involved in fandom are just straight women who identified too hard with their blorbos or something, as well as the endless use of "passing privilege" to suggest that bi people in F/M relationships are "basically straight" - but I think one thing people need to understand better is the difference between "your identity is valid, your personal experiences with homophobia/transphobia/etc. are valid" and "your judgments about the larger community that your identity makes you a member of are valid." Like, you do actually have to participate in a community to be able to be able to talk about what the consensus in it is, what the cultural norms are. You have to actually look up the history in order to know that history. If you're going to speak on behalf of All Gay Men you probably should know some beyond yourself - including ones who are not Very Online and/or aren't active in fandom - and that goes for both cis and trans gay men. (And the same is true for every subdivision of LGBTQ+, I've seen similarly bizarre takes about "lesbian culture" from 17-yro lesbians who clearly haven't talked to any outside of Tumblr and insular, dramatic Discords.)
Like, to use an analogy here to another kind of oppression: say you have a black person who was adopted by a white family very young and lived in an exclusively white neighborhood and doesn't know any other black people. Obviously, they are still black, and obviously they still experience racism (probably especially because they're an outlier in that community). Obviously, their own understanding of their identity and their experiences with racism are valid. But they aren't necessarily going to have any better of an understanding of the broader black COMMUNITY - cultural traditions, history, etc. - than a non-black person who was similarly not exposed to that community. They can only speak for themselves. And someone who isn't black but grew up near/in black communities (for instance, perhaps another transracial adoptee who was adopted by a black couple? or even just a non-black person who grew up in a heavily black neighborhood) might actually have a better sense of that broader community/culture than they do.
And this isn't a hypothetical. I've heard stuff like that about feeling like outliers in black American culture from everyone from the aforementioned transracial adoptees; to multiracial black people who were raised primarily by their non-black family; to black people who are recent immigrants from Africa rather than descendants of slaves; to black people from Europe or other parts of the Americas, who have some similarities in their culture but it's not completely 1:1. And especially from people who are some combo of the above. They have an understanding of themselves as black and of their relationship to race and racism, of course, but don't really feel like they have a particularly strong understanding of The Black Community or The Black Experience as we understand it in the USA.
I think what a lot of people don't understand is that newly-out queer people are often like that. A lot of other marginalized identities - like being a cis woman (this applies less to trans women unless they've known from early on) or being a POC - are ones where you grow up with an understanding of what that means and often a connection to a broader community that gives you some kind of consciousness of what it means to be A Woman or Black or Asian or whatever. But with queerness, it's usually not something you fully understand about yourself until adolescence or adulthood, and even when you do, you don't necessarily have access to a "community" around that until that age because you're probably being raised by cis straight people. You have to take time to discover that community and learn about it, and the culture and history that goes with, and when you start out you're going to be just as ignorant as a straight cis person who is similarly isolated from queer communities. (And frankly, a straight person with a lot of gay friends might know better than you do at first! As a lesbian with a lot of gay male friends, most of whom couldn't care less about my slash fanfic hobby if they even know about it, that's precisely why I know that these takes on Tumblr are so bizarre)
(Disability is the interesting one because it sometimes overlaps with this, sometimes doesn't - and one of the big divides in the community IME is around people who have lifelong understandings of themselves as "disabled" vs. came to it more recently, whether because the disability itself is a new thing or just their diagnosis of it. A lot of people in the second group can have very similar experiences and act in similar ways to newly-out queer people, and I know because I've lived both myself, lol.)
I think people have taken the idea of "everyone is the best expert on their own experience with oppression and their own identity" and distorted that into some weird essentialism where being gay or bi or trans or whatever gives you automatic understanding of "queer culture" or "queer history" without having to do the actual work of talking to people, participating in that community, studying history, etc. but that's just not true. Anyone can study that history and get to know those people. And yeah, as a queer or trans person you'll have a better opportunity to really deeply know and be part of that community than straight cis people with queer friends ever will, but you still have to like. Actually put yourself out there! You're not going to find it by just discoursing in a vacuum of ignorance.
--
Sadly, to all the Olds, this is very, very obvious, but there's no way to make it obvious to the people doing it. It's a matter of experience.
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Hey, headcanon time. What about Simon Blackquill x Maya Fey. If not, then another rare pair.
-Feyquill Anon
ALR!!! I do all pairings as long as they aren't problematic!!
1.
They met through Phoenix and Miles, they somehow got along very well and Phoenix and Miles weren't expecting that. Soon they started visiting each other a little too much and Klavier paid attention to their behaviour/behavior. He put 1 and 1 together then told Phoenix and Miles.
2.
Simon didn't believe the whole spirit channeling thing but asked Maya to channel Metis bc she was eating him up about it. She wanted "channeling requests" so that she can be constantly training and improve her powers, and he finally agreed and asked her to channel Metis Cykes. He provided her a picture and gave her Metis's full name. She channeled Metis, he apologised/apologized, she told him that nothing was his fault and he talked to her for quite some time.
3.
Maya has to stand on the tips of her toes and Simon has to kneel down if she wants to kiss the dude bc of the height difference being almost 30cm [almost 1 foot]. And he can pick her up and spin her around whenever she feels like it
4.
They don't really go on dates as they are busy most of the time but Maya does visit Simon a lot bc he isn't allowed into Kura'in Village as he is an outsider. Maya is trying to fix that issue as she really wants Simon to see the village and how beautiful it is.
5.
Maya is a fanfiction reader and she forced Simon to read terrible fanfiction with her so that they can make fun of it. The type of fanfiction where the author didn't have good intentions or was a newbie, the type that's bad with nothing to defend it.
6.
Athena was shocked when she first heard about their relationship and she put 1 and 1 together. Maya is now officially her step-aunt.
7.
They love to do random stuff together. Stuff that isn't sexual but it's like Maya finds a DIY hack that is very obviously fake, she knows it's fake but she gets Simon to help her do it and they end up making a huge mess. Or maybe Maya comes up with the most obnoxious idea that they can do and Simon just plays along bc he doesn't want to upset her.
8.
They both can't cook for anything so they usually order.
9.
Maya is the messy one and Simon is the organized/organised one. Maya does all the mess and Simon tidies things up after her.
10.
Both of them are bi, Simon being the distinguished bi and Maya being the disaster bi.
11.
Maya sends Simon cursed images and posts at 3 A.M., wakes him up by the notification sound, he looks at the images and is like "Maya, why the bloody hell are you awake?" and she's like "BECAUSE WHY NOT?" and continues to send him cursed images and he loves her too much to upset her so he stays quiet.
12.
When they are at Simon's residence, Maya opens up her laptop that she brought with her, searches up the scariest videos on YouTube, makes him watch the videos with her and then she gets too scared to sleep and he reassures her that everything will be alright and that none of the videos are real. She clings onto him when they sleep.
I really enjoyed doing these!! Send me more of any non-problematic ship and I'll do it!!
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List of characters/franchise I will write for plus some "rules".
NSFW NOT ALLOWED
Paimon, Sayu, Nahida, Dori and Bailu will be in the platonic/family section but they won't be considered kids.
The people you see outside of the family/platonic only section (example Dan Heng etc.) can still be requested as platonic if you want.
The Reader is either male or non-binary, majority of the characters I write for are male as well.
NSFW is not allowed right now, I'm not sure if I ever will accept NSFW but if I do the body of the reader even in gender neutral will have male body parts (either biological or through operation)
Ships are also something I will write about but if I don't like it, it makes me uncomfortable or I'm just not interested in it I won't write it since I can't find inspiration with something I'm not interested in.
You can request things outside of the Fandoms I mentioned and if I know them I will write about it, for now I added what I could think of.
This list will get updated everytime a new character gets released or I decide to put another franchise in the list.
I don't have issues about writing for sensitive/triggering topics with the characters being a source of comfort for the reader (or the character being the problematic one) however I don't want people to feel uncomfortable so please always be sure to read the possible trigger warning first so if it makes you uncomfortable you can avoid it, there's a limit of the "problematic" behavior that the character will have though and regardless of it won't be romanticized even if it ends in romance, on the other hand characters can also help with problematic things that happened to you through comfort or a angst were they are unable to comfort etc.
XOXO Droplets characters have a confirmed sexualities, some of them are confirmed straight however I'm going to make them Bisexual/Pansexual or that realized they were Bisexual/Pansexual after meeting the reader but Canonically some of them aren't Bi/Pan and that's just for the story (Like Jeremy or Shiloh are straight, but I like them too much to not write about them)
The most I can write for young characters is middle school and further, the reader will always be the same age as the character so if for example someone wants a Hinata x Reader from Haikyuu I can do it and the reader will be by default the same age and as always NSFW is not allowed and if I do unless the character is a adult and the character do become a adult at one point in the Manga, Anime, Show etc. I can age up the character if requested (like a married life or similiar) but I won't write NSFW unless the character Canonically became a adult at one point in the official story.
About characters who are ageless and either young looking or adult looking (like Hanako) I can write about it since they aren't growing anymore but obviously NSFW won't be allowed unless it's the gore/horror side but only if they look like a middle school students or older and the reader age will always match the appearance/age of the character.
Some characters aren't in the list simply because of a lack of known personality (example Wriothesly) and they will be added once I have at least a basic understanding of their personality.
For now I can't think of anyone else in the Miraculous section aside from them that I genuinely like, I'm most definetely forgotting someone though.
Genshin Impact
Mondstadt:
Albedo
Bennett
Diluc
Kaeya
Mika
Razor
Rosaria
Venti
Liyue:
Baizhu
Chongyun
Hu Tao
Shenhe
Xiao
Xingqiu
Yun Jin
Zhongli
Inazuma:
Ayato
Gorou
Heizou
Kazuha
Kokomi
Sara
Thoma
Yoimiya
Yae
Sumeru:
Al Haitham
Cyno
Candace
Kaveh
Tsuki (Wanderer)
Tighnari
Fontaine:
Charlotte
Freminet
Furina
Lyney
Neuvillette
Navia
Snezhnaya:
Ajax
Khaenri'ah:
Dainsleif
Platonic/Family Only:
Diona
Dori
Faruzan
Klee
Nahida
Paimon
Qiqi
Sayu
YaoYao
Honkai Star Rails
Astral Express:
Caelus
Dan Heng
Himeko
March
Welt
Hertha's Space Station:
Arlan
Asta
Jarilo-VI:
Gepard
Natasha
Pela
Sampo
Serval
The Xianzhou Luofu:
Jing Yuan
Platonic/Family Only:
Bailu
Clara
Hook
Hertha
Kafka
Qingque
Pom Pom
Silver Wolf
Sushang
Yanqing
Oshi No Ko
Ai Hoshino
Aquamarine Hoshino
Ruby Hoshino
Anonymous Noise
Yuzuriha Kanade (he deserves all the love in the world)
Saiki K
Akechi Touma
Aren Kuboyasu
Saiki Kusuo
Shun Kaidou
Saiki Kusuke
Brutal: Satsujin Kansatsukan no Kokuhaku/Confession of a Homicide.
Hiroki Dan
Jibaku Shounen Hanako-kun/Toilet-Bound Hanako-kun
Minamoto Teru
Minamoto Kou
Mitsuba Sousuke
Tsuchigomori
Yugi Amane/Hanako
Our Life: Beginning and Always
Baxter Ward
Cove Holden
Derek Suarez
Jeremy King
Shiloh Fields
Our Life: Now and Forever
Qiu Lin
Pran Taylor
Tamarack Baumann
XOXO Droplets
Bae Pyoun
Everett Gray
Jeremy King
JB
Lucas Kaiser
Lynn
Nate Lawson
Pran Taylor
Shiloh Fields
Miraculous
Adrien Agreste
Felix Fathom
Luka Couffaine
Tsurugi Kagami
#genshin impact#honkai star rail#oshi no ko#anonymous noise#saiki k#our life beginnings & always#our life now and forever#xoxo droplets#brutal satsujin kansatsukan no kokuhaku#male reader#non binary#gender neutral#lgbtqia#lgbtq
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histrionicwilbur -> doomsdayradio
pfp and header by @/bluberei
↳ about us
↳ poker/chorus/fate, they/he, genderqueer + aroacespec lesbian
↳ introject + nonhuman heavy polyfrag DID system of way too fucking many [medically recognized]
↳ collectively syscourse unaligned/endo apathetic, though some may lean towards pro or anti endo or be set on one
↳ personality disordered (hpd and avpd primarily), audhd, dyscalculia, madd,
↳ bodily white + ethnically jewish
↳ we don't vent here anymore, we use @fishinabirdcage, but we did vent here for a while and the vent tag is very triggering, stay safe
↳ frequent fronters
orpheus 🧋
host, npd symptoms holder
nonbinary + xenos, they/it/mint/aro + more neos
omni gaybian oriented aroace
august 📻
host, persecutor
cis guy, he/him
demiromantic asexual
chanterelle 🎶
homicidal thoughts holder, co-host
nonbinary, coffin/thou/they/she + more neos
orchidsexual bi lesbian
hadrien 🌃
caretaker/soother, co-host
agender, not sure about pronouns just use he/him
gay demisexual questioning arospec
↳ tags
↳ words words words !! - original posts
↳ home sweet home - comfort tag
↳ 2 years - fp tag
↳ foilsick - fp/chp tag
↳ genre - fp/chp tag
↳ pay attention - atp tag
↳ self-fulfilling prophecy - uscore tag
↳ feel free to ask us what any other tags mean, most of them are trauma related if youre curious lol
↳ DNI
↳ queer exclusionists (terfs, transmeds, anti-mogai, anti mspec lesbians/gays, ect)
↳ support fakeclaiming or harrassment on either side of syscourse, (pro-)tulpas, believe CDDs can be non-traumagenic, believe syscourse neutral/syscourse unaligned people are just secretly anti-endo or secretly pro-endo
↳ believe in narc abuse or any type of [pd] abuse, believe someone having any type of mental illness inherantly makes them abusive, anti informed self-dx
↳ going to tag our posts as 'q slur' (if you dont want the word queer on your blog dont reblog our posts lol)
↳ proship/anti-anti, radqueer, transid/transx (people with biid are fine obviously), pro contact or contact complex on paraphilias unabled to be consented to
↳ nsfw/kink/bdsm/"minors dni" blog (nothing against y'all we're just bodily a minor 😭)
↳ support sophieinwonderland, queer-autism, or furiousgoldfish
↳ consume media uncritically (we do have many interests in media that are considered problematic in nature but always rest assured we recognize the flaws and ask that you do that same)
↳ (just adding on to the point above, we dont plan to ever have any [fandom] dni things we again just ask that you interact with it critically and dont defend bigoted aspects of it)
↳ label as a monoconscious or adjacent system unless we interact first, we have a personal history with the term and that community in general and it tends to make us uncomfortable
↳ thin ice /hj
↳ endos and exclusively pro-endos, our general thing is we don't mind endos interacting in general but we will have certain posts with endos dni on them and obviously please don't interact with those posts, they're usually about traumagenic/CDD experiences exclusively
↳ xeno origins systems
↳ willogenic/parogenic/created systems
#words words words !!#vent#stim tag#fav#music spin#space tag#literature tag#hpd tag#madd tag#posi tag#reblog#userboxes#laugh rule#ignorance is bliss#self-fulfilling prophecy
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CW discourse
Hello! question for southpark fans and non-fans !!
hope this makes sense, english is my second language and i'm very tired
•feel free to comment, please be respectful especially if you're not in any of the affected groups mentioned!!!
is southpark genuinely problematic*? can you watch and criticize it at the same time?
*is it actually problematic? i will be speaking on things i can talk about as a trans lesbian!
I do think southpark has a problem with trans and lesbian rep, whilst i am very happy for what they've done with Tweek (literally one of the best reps i've ever seen), also the bi rep is quite nice , they still lack in the trans and lesbian rep. , and like they got better with gay rep i hope they do the same with trans and lesbian rep ( i acknowledge SP makes fun of everyone, but it usually ends with a punchline along the lines of the bigoted party being in the wrong very obviously, but then there's video like "go, strong women, go!" where it depicts just plain transphobia with no punchline in it, and in the comments its filled with brim with transphobes and transmeds, also the overly feminine gay characters and overly masculine lesbian characters...)
I won't be speaking on the "racism and antisemetism", because i'm not of neither groups, but i saw some comments and analysis about how some episodes actually HELPED with getting rid off antisemetism and racism! (i can link the analysis etc. if someone asks me for it!) , most of episodes actually make fun of antisemites and racist, but for some reason a lot of racist teenagers (sometimes adults too...) think that this show is actually supporting them?
can we really get away from any type of problematic media?? i mean even fck!ng sanrio and MLP had racism in it, some ppl who hate on southpark watch DSMP or worse sh!t😭
i feel really bad for liking southpark, i certainly do not like that it was written by two cishet white dudes, but i also think a lot of people didnt properly watch any episodes and don't understand what the show is actually trying to say. i feel bad for watching it and liking it, and i dont know what to do about it. i got very hyperfixated and there's two groups of people, either one hating on it saying Its extremly problematic or the other one saying that Its the purpose of the show..
#bunny southpark#style southpark#southpark#tweek x craig#creek fanart#creek south park#tweek and craig#tweek tweak#craig tucker#tweek
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Controversial opinion but I cannot take non-straight!Eddie / Steve / Nancy / Max / Lucas / El etc headcanons or theories seriously.
I get that ppl all have headcanons about the characters and it is also because they want to see themselves in these characters or like certain dynamics between the chaarcters. But for the love of me, I just cannot really like it. Fanfics are fun and all but there's just something that irks me about non-straight!Steve or Eddie headcanons. Because there is literally nothing that shows or suggests that these guys are actually non-straight, nor there is any actual romantic dynamic written between them. It is also annoying that they are put in the same place as ships like Byler that actually has canon evidence and is half-way canon already. It is also that the writers havent spent so much time on queercoding Will and Mike's characters but then they just..... forgot to actually queercode Nancy, Max, Lucas and El? I heavily dislike it when ppl say Nancy must be a lesbian bc she doesnt actually love Steve or Jonathan. I dislike it when Max must be bisexual because... uh... because what? Because she might have had a crush on El? People basing Lucas ''bisexuality'' on Lucas's ST book bc he described a fellow black kid bc he was happy that he found another black kid like himself.... just doesnt sit right with me. I dont like it when ppl say El is a lesbian bc 'she got stuck in the lab and called nancy and other females pretty too'.
Bruh not everyone is non-straight, ok? Some characters (actually most characters) are straight on this show and dont have that sort of characterization. I am sorry i just cannot take Stddie seriously even if the fic is written well
Hi anon! I believe you are conflating headcanons and theories.
Let's define our terms!
According to Merriam-Webster Dictionary, "Headcanon refers to something that a fan imagines to be true about a character even though no information supporting that belief is spelled out in the text. Sometimes that involves filling in your own explanation for a character’s strange motivation, or projecting aspects onto a character that make them more relatable to you."
So headcanons aren't something to be "taken seriously" in the first place. They're just for fun. And if headcanons about characters being queer aren't fun for you, just don't engage with the content. Unfollow, block, filter, whatever you gotta do.
Now... Is this the part where I remind everyone that I DON'T LIKE ST3DDIE EITHER. (Obligatory link to my St3ddie post that I will CONTINUE TO LINK in every single one of my responses on this topic.) I agree that Steve being heterosexual in canon is important to his character, and I don't personally HC him as queer for that reason. People HCing Steve as queer isn't problematic though because HCs don't affect canon and they don't even need to be based in canon! Because they are for fun! I promoted the St3ddie script because I'm a huge fan of Ella's writing and I enjoyed it for that reason. And she doesn't ship St3ddie either! It wasn't meant to be taken so seriously. It was for fun.
Also.
Most people who HC the characters you mentioned as queer fully realize that they were not written as such and aren't trying to comvince you that they are. Personally? My sexuality HCs (except Mike, but that's more of a theory than a HC) are based mostly on vibes.
For example: Lucas is bi to me because one time I saw a tweet that said that Lucas had a little crush on Will when they were younger, and I thought that was cute. And it's fun! Based in canon? No. Cute? Yes!! I hadn't even heard about the section in his book, and obviously when I did, I recognized that it was not meant to imply that Lucas was attracted to that kid (and yes it also rubs me wrong when people misinterpret it as such, because it takes away from the real meaning.) But Lucas is bi to me because I think it's cute and fun, not because there's any canonical evidence. And I literally don't care. Because it's a headcanon.
Max is bi because she's cool, and straight people are not cool.
Nancy Wheeler is bi because I want her so bad.
El is a lesbian because that's how I personally choose to interpret some of her actions. Not because I believe the Duffers wrote her that way.
Anyway. Hope this helps.
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REALIZATION
My biggest moment of self-division is the actual-virtual bi-locality. Most practically put, that means that I’m ambivalent about social media, both repulsed by and obsessed with it.
Even more telescoped out from this is the either-or necessity of durational experience. To be is to choose.
One makes so many choices (unconsciously) that it is not appropriate to say, even if one were to try to forgo Choice™, that one may exist without choosing. It is purely conjectural, but it is also plain sense that one makes choices* about the totality of one’s experience as far back as one cares to take the thread.How deep does the metaphorical “Covenant” go?†
Upon further reflection, the question leads me to the imperativeness of non-duality as a state of being that needs to be practiced and realized if we wish to help each other out of what seems to be an escalating disaster which is global, but also very specifically in the United States, and also very specifically everywhere therein, including my own neighborhood. [My experience is not everyone’s experience. But my experience is my whole world, and so I interpret it thusly, which is, I assure you!, a delicate integration indeed.]
I think there is something to be said for “reading” the world like you read a poem.+ If for no other reason than that in the same way that a poem refuses to collapse into one meaning, so our lives speak to us, refusing a single interpretation. In one canto (“era” for the young gurls who don’t read anything but each other), an event or image can seem surreal, while at different parts of the poem, it can seem mundane, or even profane.
RE: Big Ideas in my poem.
I failed in my attempt to connect to my father spiritually. We do not, after all, worship the same [...], I fear; though, during my monasticism, I was able, in my fervor of vocation, to bridge some gap, by “faith” (the only language we speak in common). We interpret salvation, insomuch as I will even agree to engage with that metaphor, in such different ways, and consequently, we have such different worlds. The salvific idea is to him his whole world. It is an idea within my world. But somehow those worlds are, at the final, I regret to admit, incompatible.
I could pour out a volume of text about my Mother and say nothing. On the other hand, she wrote her own autobiography (by all accounts, a dependable witness), and it is a charming read. She glosses over our difficulties during my youth. In the same way, they are currently glossing over the cause of my sister’s death§.
To be, or not to be, on the Internet? I suppose that’s the question of this very online (it must be noted) meditation. If I were better at The Internet™ I would title this post that question. But I don’t feel I’m terribly good at the Internet, obviously. There’s something in here about ambivalence and seduction. I imagine that’s problematic discourse, but I honestly don’t know. I know that to be on The Internet™ is to get feedback, and I have open wounds re: rejection, so I can’t just throw myself to the wolves.
Anyway, I don’t have any intention of posting anything on TikTok, and I’m sorry to be so ambivalent in my postings here, which is my spiritual home. I am, obviously, ambivalent about the idea of “home” in general. We have not, historically, gotten along well as a person-concept relationship. I will try to do better with your patience and God’s help.
___________
FOOTNOTES
* This is not to say that we actively participate in our own oppression, though we sometimes do that, too. The agreements are sometimes of direst necessity; but we do agree to exist with others—however tenuously—if we are aware of this post.
† This is nothing but the mystical theology of Paul of Tarsus, differently worded. Paul expresses the collective body in terms of spirituality, but the metaphor holds across multiple levels of concert, both extremely concrete— even vital—to the hypothetical-abstract. But really, here I’m just talking about what we perceive as a personal body. I do wonder what we find at the level of organ systems, etc. Which is to beg the question of the possibility that the state of being a Subject renders one ironically a Tyrant of the system, insomuch as the Subject-Tyrant is not attentive to its constituents.
+ But I’m not exactly the model of emotional or mental stability. As always around here, caveat lector.
§ Alcoholism in co-morbidity with lupus and severe mental health issues. I do not share her lupus diagnosis, but it must be admitted that I am in some danger, as I continue to use substances as often as I may so long as it doesn’t interfere with my professional capacities. My mental health is spicy. People joke, but I think that’s a great description in lieu of a diagnosis, which I cannot, at this time, afford, and which I do not, for good or ill, at this time, require.
Rest in peace, AutumnZephyr (née Toni Lynette). Rise in glory, and call forth your New Name.
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BL is guy-on-guy Japanese media. Short for boy's love. I've watched a lot of "activists" who claim to be for LGBT people say that any guy-on-guy stuff will always fetishize gay/bi men, even if it's men who enjoy it too. BL tends to be more geared towards women, but that isn't to say men don't enjoy it either. The men who like bl/geicomi (gay comics) tend to get treated as "traitors" for their enjoyment. There's a very big cultural component with LGBT women enjoying that kind of stuff. Japanese context, I mean.
There is the stereotype of women who have looked at gay/bi men as something to fulfill their shipping fodder, but I really do think that can be fixed with more socialization. And those girls thinking that's how real gay/bi men work. Unhealthy dynamics, yadda yadda. It's a matter of separating fiction from reality, I suppose? And the stereotype of those girls is them drooling over a gay couple irl, waiting for them to kiss. "Oh, this is just like one of my animes!" If I can paraphrase Hal from Metal Gear Solid.
I'm summing things up and probably not doing a good job of it. Sometimes those girls are just starting to realize things about their own sexuality. Doesn't exactly excuse them, but I've seen guys get creepy about gals on that side too. Real gals, I mean. Does that make sense?
While I personally wretch at the whole "male gaze theory" and stuff like that...at the end of the day, those characters are fictional. What truly matters, I think, is how you treat real people. Treat those as you wish to be treated, y'know? That's how I've gone about it. Dunno how it'll work for you, Nonny.~From an older bisexual weeb-ass woman who enjoys bl/geicomi/yuri/straight stuff and who has seen some shit since the early 2000's to the BL anon girl.
Ah, I see. Thanks for the clarification.
I mean, I don't think that women fetishising mlm relationships should just be swept under the rug like this. This sort of feels like you're just trying to say that it isn't really a problem, when it kind of is. Like I do think that some stories of people like that are exaggerated, but that doesn't mean that fetishising mlm or wlw relationships is like, an okay or good thing to do.
Basically, if you are very very invested in a group (especially a minority group) that you yourself are not a part of, why? Why are you so fascinated? What specifically is it about mlm relationships that non mlm are so invested in? Usually when it's wlw relationships being fetishised it winds up devaluing the relationship and putting it 'not on the same level' as hetero relationships. It's treated like it's just entertainment (generally for hetero men) who just think the idea of 2 women is hot even though they don't actually view that as a valid or 'real' relationship. I think that the fetishisation around mlm relationships in fandom spaces, which I usually see coming from hetero (although sometimes bi, apparently) women is kind of the same thing on a smaller scale. In a lot of fandom areas mlm relationships get treated like their only real value is as entertainment.
Frankly fetishisation of mlm and wlw relationships is just kind of another flavour of homophobia. That being said, it obviously isn't inherently fetishising for a woman to enjoy some mlm content or a man to enjoy some wlw content. It's just when it becomes like, very close to an obsession, or like the only sort of media that you're interested in that it becomes problematic.
The way the last anon described her feelings felt kind of off, and idk if I just misread or something, but it sounded like she said that even though she's a bi woman, she feels liberated by only mlm media which goes against gender norms and toxic masculinity. Well.. why not also wlw media? Why not women who go against gender norms also..?
Tldr, I'm not saying it's wrong or bad for someone to enjoy stories about people who are not the same as them, it's fine to do that. But when you become obsessed or very enamoured with a group of people that you are not a part of, you really need to ask yourself why.
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modern josh lyman headcanons
oh my god here we go more of my modern west wing au!
similar to sam, it is non-negotiable that josh lyman is a complete and utter disaster of a bisexual man. every day of his life is a fight for survival. he may as well be declared an endangered species. actually, yes he's going to call the world wildlife foundation rn because then he could give out those certificates of “adoption” that come with hyper-realistic stuffed animals like
except they’d be plush joshs that he can scatter throughout the west wing (especially amongst charlie’s belongings)
okay moving on
his favorite movie is mamma mia, he cries every time.
he refuses to use apple products, takes way too much joy in being the only green text in the group chat, and endlessly makes fun of donna for wearing airpods
he nearly strangles himself the next day when his wired headphones get caught in his scarf
he has a finsta (fake instagram) account that he pretty much exclusively uses to shit talk, it’s very popular, even with republican congressmen. one day, he gets a scoop from a reporter that follows the account about a republican crossing the aisle on their latest bill, and josh almost has an asthma attack while trying to explain to leo how he knows and why leo is forbidden from seeing the post
the president is making him (really the entire senior staff but he’s the only one impressionable enough to go through with it) learn latin on duolingo. it’s not really working but josh likes showing bartlet that he’s leveled up :)
josh can’t function if he’s not listening to a true crime podcast, the more grusome the better. the most expansive social security platform this country’s seen in decades was written to a soundtrack of “wine and crime”
josh isn’t out, and categorically isn’t dealing with that. or at least he wasn’t planning to up until he gets too fired up with senator matt skinner in the white house mess late one night and accidentally blurts out, to a republican senator of all people, that he’s bi just to make the point
[cue a very stressful, tearful conversation in the oval office]
josh, it’s my catholicism, not yours. no i’m not going to fire you.
every third saturday of the month he plays among us with zoey. she’s a pathological liar, honestly it terrifies josh. he’s god awful at the game, so much so that zoey convinces everyone he’s the imposter pretty much every round. he’s only broken one mouse over the injustice. zoey’s sure she can get him to punch the monitor before midterms.
josh is a social media darling. he lives on it, and only causes minor national security threats once or twice a month. most recently, he caused the FTC to open an investigation on the Bartlet Administration for inside trading thanks to his ongoing beef with the Taco Bell account.
he’s got a bit of a thing for tom brady, which is problematic for several reasons including but not limited to: (1) brady’s obviously a republican and almost certainly not into dudes (toby is skeptical), (2) he keeps winning superbowls so his team keeps showing up to the white house for photo ops which toby spares no expense to embarrass/fluster josh, (3) bartlet, a tried and true son of new england himself, is of course also a patriots fan which means josh gets stuck every week coaching bartlet on his fantasy team
margaret has won the west wing league three years in a row
josh is certain that she’s colluding with the russians
he’s addicted to tiktok, specifically this weird niche community of stay at home moms preparing their kids’ school lunches. he finds it cathartic.
cj says he’s projecting some long, unresolved childhood trauma and should probably tell his therapist instead of venting in the comment section of shannon’s cream cheese raspberry roll ups.
cj’s a fucking narc, that’s what she is.(and he’s so not sharing his roll ups with her tomorrow)
there for sure will be more of these. in the meantime, check out my modern au fic, which is going to turn into a series of loosely connected one-shots!
#modern west wing au#josh lyman#sam seaborn#donna moss#jed bartlet#leo mcgarry#toby ziegler#charlie young#zoey bartlet#cj cregg#the west wing#tww#west wing fanfic#josh x donna#josh x sam#PLEASE CAN U TELL IM WRITING A JED & JOSH HURT COMFORT CENTRIC SERIES FDJSKFJDAS#okay bye love u <3#bisexual josh lyman
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any recs of anime or manga with butch characters? ive seen all the standard ones like sailor moon, oniisama e (rei is always on my mind), and standard yuri animes. i just would love to see more masculine female characters :/
i’m butch myself, so seeing this in my inbox made me smile. but before address the question, i want to cover my bases and clarify a couple of points first:
“butch” as a wlw identity doesn’t really exist in japan the same way it does in like, america for instance. the japanese lgbt scene has its own identities, roles, and lexicon which are embedded within the history of japanese lgbt people. while the terms “neko” and “tachi” are often mistranslated as “fem(me)” and “butch”, they aren’t actually the same thing, and have completely separate histories and social contexts in which they exist.
however, you seem to be using the term butch here to loosely mean “masculine woman”, rather than as a wlw identity/role, so i’m gonna follow your lead. generally speaking, women’s masculinity in japan has a very different history and set of standards than that of western butchness. japanese masc women, as a result, don’t present the same way as western masc women, and so in many cases they may not read the same way to a western reader as they would to a japanese one. stuff like that is important to keep in mind when looking at how masculinity in women is portrayed in japanese media.
as an aside, i generally dislike the use of the descriptor “masculine female” to define “butch”, as it can be interpreted as exclusionary to butch trans women. while obviously trans women are as female as any other woman, there’s significant precedent for terfs using the term “masculine female” as a catch-all which homogenizes masculine cis women, nonbinary people, and trans men while simultaneously excluding trans women entirely. so i tend to be pretty careful on how i use terms like “male” and “female” in this context.
with all of that being said:
my #1 rec is obviously gonna be revolutionary girl utena, the anime (moreso than the manga, which while due plenty of credit as the source material, is bogged down so much by chiho saitou’s own heteronormativity that it fails to reach its own narrative potential; this is a rare case where the anime adaptation is leagues above the source material in quality). that is, if you haven’t already seen it (not sure whether it falls under your definition of “standard”). the crux of the show is about deconstructing the role of womanhood and its impact on those who live within that role’s relationships both with men and with other women. it is, in my opinion, an indispensable work of art.
similarly, you should definitely check out rose of versailles by riyoko ikeda if you haven’t read/watched it already (you may well have, if you’ve already read oniisama e). it’s not a yuri (unfortunately...it should have been smdh) although it is a staple of the dansou theme in manga, and takes much inspiration from the yuri genre; the female lead oscar, who has lived her whole life within the “male” role, has a very romantic friendship with her friend/mentee rosalie.
golondrina by est em is definitely worth checking out too; the main character is a masc lesbian pursuing the traditionally male-dominated sport of bullfighting, but it isn’t focused on romance (although it does come up, especially later in the series). some might fund the subject matter questionable, although the ethical concerns surrounding bullfighting are discussed, the way it’s romanticized by the main characters is bound to make some people uncomfortable.
i also highly recommend you check out ebine yamaji’s yuri manga, pretty much all of which feature somewhat more “tomboyish” bi women or lesbian main characters. love my life is her most well known work, and it’s my all time favorite work of hers as well. they’re less overtly masculine, and i doubt any would self-describe as such. still, it fits the bill close enough and i can’t resist recommending ebine yamaji every chance i get, so sue me.
tsuki to suppin is another yuri manga you might like, with one of the main characters being rather tomboyish, particularly relative to her more feminine girlfriend. although like with ebine yamaji, it’s more androgyny-based and isn’t the sort of “masculinity” readily intelligible with butchness. if you like soft lesbian slice of life this is a great manga to check out.
karubania monogatari by tono also fits the bill, and is not dissimilar in many ways to rose of versailles as far as both the old-fashioned political elements of its setting and the princely (well, duke-ly) role of the main lead, although i recommend it much more hesitantly than the above, because it has some majorly problematic elements that ultimately lead me to drop the series, but you’re still welcome to give it a go.
to note a couple of non-manga graphic novels from other countries that fit this bill as well:
the manhua tamen de gushi has a distinctly masc/fem lesbian couple as its primary focus. it’s very slow-burn and generally inexplicit, at least in part due to having to circumvent chinese censorship laws, but is still a very sweet read and the characters are very likeable.
the american graphic novel roadqueen by mira ong chua also centers on a masc/fem lesbian couple, and takes a huge amount of inspiration from the yuri tradition, as well as women’s biker gangs. it’s action-packed and a ton of fun.
ah, that’s all i can think of for now. hope this helps!
#no i will not apologize for my impromptu essay on dykery at the beginning#ask#manga recs#not mangacap
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Can we talk about the rampant bi/panphobia surrounding Yang "looks at guys like they're fresh meat in the first 3 volumes and chibi" Xiao Long? Blake's gets brought up a lot as 90% of her reason for existing is to be the romancable NPC, but it's hardly talked about with Yang. She has shown express interest in guys. Even if Bees goes canon, it's not a Bi/Lesbian ship. It's a Bi/Bi or Bi/Pan ship or what ever other possible identity that doesn't erase Yang's attraction to men. I get the whole wanting rep thing but there's more lesbians in RWBY than any other LGBT identity and they aren't really that good in terms of representation. Do we really need another angry/aggressive/problematic lesbian in RWBY? And whenever it does get brought up, Lesbian!Yang fans always go "oh, it's just comphet". Um, excuse me? Isn't comphet not supposed to be a thing in Remnant?
Okay, so there's a lot to unpack here, and I do get why you're so frustrated because as a bi person, it gets so frustrating dealing with not only a huge lack of representation, but also feeling boxed out of, undervalued by, and invalidated by your own community sometimes. I myself have been really frustrated and even hurt by the way many RWBY fans (and specifically Bumblebee fans) have talked about Blake and Yang's sexuality, like they would be less gay or less rep if they were bi, how shipping them with men is 'wrong' because it's 'straight behavior' and 'validating the straights,' and I got particularly annoyed once by a post that claimed that people only shipped Yang and Weiss so that they could force Blake - who they claimed was a canon lesbian - into a relationship with a man. I think it's clear why people talk about Blake's status as bi more than Yang's - Yang has one moment in eight seasons where she acts clearly attracted to men, whereas Blake has had two canon romantic relationships with men, Adam being her ex and her having gone on a date with and kissed Sun on the cheek. When people dispute Blake's status as a bi, sometimes they (rightly) come at it from the point of view of 'this is just my own personal headcanon for my own benefit.' But too often, Blake's attraction to men is dismissed outright and fans try and find every excuse to invalidate it so that they can insist that Blake is a canon lesbian. That's pretty openly biphobic imo. (Also I don't agree that 90% of Blake's character is a romancable NPC. I think maybe she's become mostly not an active character who only really exists as support and romance, but the idea that it's 90% of her overall show character is weird to me, Blake is done dirty by the show but that doesn't mean she's not a character for the first five seasons.)
But Yang is also worth talking about. Because of the fact that her moment of displaying clear attraction towards men is brief and early in the show, many fans have just... Thrown it out entirely, and decided that not only does it not count, but that anyone who brings it up is living in the past and is stupid for paying attention to the early seasons. That's obviously really dumb. The idea that after the first five seasons, Yang is displaying clear romantic attraction towards a girl for the first time, she is now one hundred percent a lesbian in canon because she's only displayed romantic attraction towards men once... That's also rooted in biphobia. Being attracted to men doesn't just suddenly go away because you're attracted to women and vice versa, no one chooses to be bi, gay, straight, ace, whatever. If Yang was sexually attracted towards men at seventeen, that part of her doesn't stop existing just because she's sexually attracted to women too. The thing is, headcanoning Yang (or even Blake!) as a lesbian is totally fine. I think the RWBY creators did say that sexism, racism, and homophobia doesn't exist in Remnant, but like ??? Idk why they'd decide something like that if they were gonna make jokes about Jaune and Qrow wearing skirts haha laugh at the non-gender-conformity of men, and if they'd write the first five seasons with literally one gay character, while tons of straight relationships that get credence, everyone else expresses no clear romantic inclination towards the same sex for five years of the show running. And we're supposed to think there's no heteronormativity at least? Cardin and Jaune both have clear toxic masculinity problems that Jaune grows out of, but we're supposed to think that toxic masculinity has nothing to do with any sexism or homophobia, however internalized? I think if people want their fans to believe there is not sexism or homophobia or racism in their fake world, they need to make good and sure their own internalized issues don't leak into their work. So I don't think it's wholly invalid when people decide that in their headcanon, they think Yang just acted like she was attracted to men because she thought she should. I especially think it's valid for people to headcanon that Yang had acted like she attracted to men because she thought she was. She was only seventeen, seventeen year olds put on behavior that they think is cool and she is the niece of Qrow 'wink at Winter to piss her off' Branwen, and Yang could've realized maybe during school that putting on behavior was all that was, and that she isn't actually attracted towards men and likes girls - specifically the girl dancing with Sun at the school ball. That's perfectly valid as a headcanon. But that's all it is, a headcanon.
Yang is not a canon lesbian and it's perfectly valid and supported by Yang's canon interactions for people to consider her bi or pan, and people can even headcanon her as ace if they want. Trying to demand that other people see fictional characters as the sexuality you prefer them in is just going to drive wedges, especially when so much venom seems to be directed towards bi characters, with others acting like they're literally less rep if they also have romantic interactions with people of the opposite sex. Like, people literally have the idea of "I love that Blake is bi, but I hate that people are shipping her with men or talking about Blake's romances with men and idk why the show put any focus on her romantically interacting with men." Like, sure, okay, so you support bi characters so long as they don't be bi too obviously. But... I'm getting off topic.
Here's the thing... I would caution not to get too deep in this "there's too many lesbians," concept. We're supposed to all be one community, supporting and fighting for each other. The problem isn't that there's too much representation for lesbians, the problem is that there is not enough representation for bi people, or pan, or ace, or trans men, or trans women, or non-binary people, etc. We don't have to wish less for other gay people to wish for more for ourselves. I agree that disregarding Yang's moment of attraction to men maybe isn't the way to go, but it's not that there are already enough lesbians in RWBY. There are only three side characters (by the way, two of them aren't confirmed lesbians, just because they're in a relationship with each other,) two of whom made a very minor appearance in all of two or three episodes and will likely never return to the story. As you say, the rep that lesbians have gotten in RWBY isn't very good. Them desiring more representation is perfectly valid, and I even get them wanting that representation from Yang, despite her single moment of lusting after boys in season one. That's a perfectly understandable desire. I myself want gay Neptune despite him expressing interest in women. It's not wrong. The only thing that's wrong is villainizing and mocking people for their own very valid ships like BlackSun or Yang x Jaune or Yang x Mercury or Blake x Ren or whatever ships people like. I'm sorry that I can't agree with you here, but if there was a scene in RWBY where Yang discusses her feelings for Blake and says that she realized she's a lesbian... I might not be particularly happy with the writing staff, because I already heard there's an element of disregarding Blake's former relationship with Sun in things like the comics, which is frustrating as a bi person. But I would be happy for the people who would find in this something that speaks to them and makes them feel like their own experiences are represented. Sometimes I can feel excluded from the LGBTQ+ community due to my attraction towards men, and that's hard, but I'm not going to start devaluing the victories of other gay people because of it, I'm not going to start getting upset when they get representation, or when a character they love claims an identity that reflects their own.
I do get where your frustration is coming from though, and it's perfectly valid to feel upset and exasperated both with the way MKEK write their queer relationships and in how people in the fandom tend to disregard the bi identity of characters.
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hi hi history-non again, sorry I know it's a very
ahem wide and girthy ahem
ask, and i'm sorry for not narrowing it down farther my brain is smooth as butter and the dart board, so to speak, is. big. i feel like im throwing my dart in the ocean of 'what i don't know' and trying to spear a fish who might speak to me like the queer elder i never ha d ;lkasjd;flkas damn you small conservative town ANYWAYS
i guess okay maybe do you have any favourite figureheads? whats your fave pieces of lgbtqa+ media (like books or shows?)
thanks again and sorry for.
uh.
big.
--
Lolololol. Yes.... it’s so... big...
In the 90s, the writers of nonfiction who I found really inspirational were Susie Bright and Kate Bornstein. My Gender Workbook was a classic. I gather there’s a new edition.
I was a massive, massive nerd, so my actual favorite queer book as a 14-year-old is one that will be a bit... uh... much if you’re not feeling very intellectual. It’s Third Sex, Third Gender: Beyond Sexual Dimorphism in Culture and History. This thing is a massive doorstop of a book that collects academic journal articles on third gender roles from various cultures. I was obsessed with this thing. Again, it’s academic journal articles, not popular nonfiction, so expect that level of impenetrable prose.
I was also a giant weeb, so I read a bunch of books on the history of gay sex in Japan. It’s pretty interesting how much people assume the “m/m sex = sin” shit was worldwide and how much it just was not.
In terms of fiction, I’ve always struggled to find f/f media I relate to. I really like the tv adaptations of Fingersmith and Tipping the Velvet. Lots of fucked up problematicness and gorgeous visuals. Gotta love the lady with the strap-on and the gold body paint!
For other queer media, I was a big fan of Velvet Goldmine and of Pedro Almodóvar’s older films, which are full of every problematic kink you can think of. They also have a lot of het I like, like the lady being coerced into sex (that she enjoys) by the drag queen who impersonates her famous mother she has a lot of mommy issues about... except said drag queen is really an undercover police officer. Just... whut. (All the “straight” stuff in Almodóvar’s films is also bugfuck nuts and often kind of queer.)
I really, really, really loved Crash. Not the shitty one that won an oscar: the car crash perverts one full of weird UST. There’s a ton of straight sex in this too, along with every gender combo and a laundry list of upsetting kinks. It’s just every kind of weird perv thing. (”Weird art film full of sex and problematicness” is pretty much the defining feature of movies I liked as a teen. I loved Kissed, that het necrophilia movie too.)
Stage Beauty is probably my favorite film for bi vibes. It’s this meditation on identity as the English stage was changing over from having men play women to having actual actresses. It ends in f/m, but it’s definitely a very queer film.
If you want slice of life stuff, I guess you could try Dykes to Watch Out For (the comic that’s the source of the bechdel test) or the Tales of the City novel series. These will both give you a sense of what was going on in certain queer communities in the late 20thC. If you want something relatively fluffy, Maurice is a historical costume drama with a happy ending. I found it awfully slow as a college student, but it does have naked Rupert Graves (Lestrade from Sherlock), so...
----
See, this is hard to answer because I came of age and did all of my reading of that kind a long time ago. I pretty quickly moved on to fangirl media, which I have always liked a lot better than other arguably queer stuff. Back in the 90s, that meant Japanese stuff and fic. Later, I had access to more flavors of by-fujoshi-for-fujoshi media.
So my actual favorite m/m books are a bunch of “m/m romance” (i.e. American BL being sold as ebooks on amazon). If you want live action TV and fandomy vibes, you’re better off with Trapped (hot cop/mobster action!) or one of those Thai series about schoolboys or something than stuff made by cis gay men in the US.
I also came of age in an era when “queer” media was very Cis Gay Men And Sometimes Cis Lesbians with an occasional nod to bi people existing... maybe. Kate Bornstein and a few others were raising the profile of MtF transsexuals (the term in use at the time) who wanted surgery or even, gasp, maybe didn’t want bottom surgery in some cases. Anything about FtMs or nb/agender/etc. identities was practically invisible. I saw the term ‘genderqueer’ around a bit, but it was mostly in contexts that were very tryhard and unappealing to me.
(You haven’t given any details, but I’m going to go out on a limb and guess you’re like much of tumblr and the flavors of queerness you relate to aren’t so much the Cis Gay Men Only culture that makes up quite a bit of queer history and older queer media.)
I can tell you what I liked as a teen, but not everybody is into fucked up art films that may not have happy endings. I can try to rec things about queer culture in the 90s, but I probably don’t have great recs for way earlier or later than that... unless it’s so much earlier that I’ve researched it while writing fic of some historical canon or other. A lot of how I learned about queer culture myself was from magazines or from reading soc.bi on usenet or just from living through the 90s--not typically from books that are easy to unearth and just hand to someone now.
I tend to just not like anything in the contemporary romance or slice of life genres, regardless of gender and orientation, so while I’ve watched/read a bit more queer stuff like this, especially in the past when I had less access to queer media, it’s not a space I’m great at reccing in. And that’s unfortunate because a lot of that type of art gives you a better sense of what other queer people were like in other eras and/or it’s a safer rec than some bananas crazy BDSM film.
I was, and am, very kinky (though pretty lazy in terms of actual practice), so a lot of my reading and media interest was bound up in that also. Obviously, I was quite interested in the drawings of Tom of Finland or the photography of Robert Mapplethorpe, but are you going to be into photos of some guy shoving a whip handle in his ass? I love the movie Cruising... it’s about serial killers and leather and homophobia and is every bit as potentially traumatizing as that sounds.
I feel you on the problem of finding queer elders. There isn’t really an obvious way to go about this.
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frostmaster
SHIP: Loki/The Grandmaster
TW // discussions of slavery & r*pe
a) do I ship it
It's complicated. Yes. No. It depends on how you define shipping? It's more like: I like fics where there's an unhealthy power imbalance between the two and seeing how it fucks up loki's psyche and calls back past trauma in a non offensive way. The idea of them (loki) having a sugar daddy isnt bad either, but as I'll elaborate on...Loki is the Grandmaster's prisoner. So...its complicated.
b) why i do/why i don’t
There's this moment in TR (which its established that I hate) where the Grandmaster implies he fucks & takes advantage of his "youthful appearance"(?) on Sakaar--later ofc it's confirmed that yes, he does fuck, he has a ship for orgies in fact--then promptly wiggles his eyebrows at loki. And loki looks extremely uncomfortable. Is that because the grandmaster is putting this display in front of thor? Or something more? Watching the film I interpreted it as the fact that loki's distinctly uncomfortable with the relationship, that there's been some consent issues (noncon or at the very least dubcon).
So what am I getting at? Basically, Sakaar is yet another chunk of angst for loki (later that narrative is shit upon via laughs but whatever). I like reading about it but only because I like to feel emotional pain in my fics and I'm a masochist and frostmaster in this au does all of that: assault, trauma, catharsis, hurt/comfort w thor (and sometimes hurt/no comfort). I'd be down to read a non-rapey fic for them too, but it would need to still portray the relationship as unhealthy.
c) what makes it toxic
The grandmaster is a literal slaver. And loki is his slave, whether they call it that or not. So if frostmaster is a thing, loki is a sex slave. I hate r*gnarok, loki doesnt deserve that shit. And that is fine to include in the narrative!!! Completely fine--if it has been done well. Which it wasn't in the canon material. Instead there are "anus" jokes and other dumb shit. The grandmaster is seen too as this funny gay character too...um....he's a slaver...he owns slaves and kills them and apparently fucks them too...
I have no issue with frostmaster shipping in fanon (again, go batshit crazy with your fanfic and aus), but in canon it's so problematic and made me very uncomfortable while watching the movie because there was so much subtext and then it was just...never talked about.
I'm just so annoyed because tumblr (and Jeff goldblum!!) is all like "uwu ragnarok is so gay #frostmaster" (I mean theres valkyrie being bi too but I need to stay on topic), but it's...not that? Even in the fluffiest au, the canon basis is still slave/slaver. In a context where loki has already been abused & manipulated their whole life and enslaved by thanos, too. So like as I always say, ship whatever the hell you want, but don't pretend that this is good almost-canon subtextual gay rep. Its fucking not.
d) what makes it ship-worthy
Ok back to being positive! Frostmaster does have a lot of great moments! For one, there is the whole sugar daddy possibility, and the power dynamics can be sexy in a fanfic (again, not canon...whyyy). Loki is considered a sexual being by most of the fandom and the grandmaster is obviously so as well, so they'd work well as a couple in that regard, especially in a trauma free/modern-no-powers/etc au. In TR there is a hell of a lot of subtext too, which is pretty intriguing, too. And one of the actors actually ships it so there's that 😂
If you got to the end...thank you! I appreciate you coming to my tedtalk. Thank you lovely anon for the ask and I hope I didnt insult/offend or trigger you in any way 😣
Send me a problematic ship and I'll give you my thoughts!!
#frostmaster#anti ragnarok#the grandmaster#loki laufeyson#lovely loki#frostmaster critical#but not anti!#marvel#marvel meta#mcu#mcu meta#mine#my meta#tw r*pe mention#tw slavery mention#tw abuse#marvel salt#ask game#letters#anon#long post#ns/fw
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Supernatural Diseases - Shifters
Note: Please message us if you plan on using these! We just want to coordinate to make sure there’s no doubling up at the same time.
General:
Stuck Shift: For those who can shift at will, a stuck shift is when an individual is stuck between their two forms, which can be very painful and make it hard for the person to function. Generally resolves on its own with time, but there may be some lotions sold on Amity Road that can speed things up.
Balam:
Chronic hairballs, obviously.
Apotheon: The balam suffers from the feeling that they are something divine that was broken into many pieces, and begins to exhibit deific delusions of grandeur and a sense of creeping loss. There isn’t a known cause to this condition, and it can be difficult for a balam to get out of this mindset. However, they can be shaken from it if something forces them to come to grips with their own mortality.
Toxoplasmosis magicii: A magical parasite much like the normal cat parasite, that is completely harmless to the jaguar form and can cause fever, body aches, swollen lymph nodes while a balam is in human form. This results in an increased desire to stay in the jaguar form for longer and longer periods. Can be treated with selkie slime.
Bugbear:
Fear Toxicity: Fear begins to be toxic to the bugbear, usually derived from not feeding enough. Over time, the bugbear will grow gradually sicker as they continue to feed, and eventually they will be completely unable to feed on fear, leading to inevitable starvation. In the short term, this causes their illusion powers to not function properly, and in the long term it is deadly. Fortunately, there’s an easy enough cure -- receiving a nightmare from a mara.
Scare-bies: Caused by small, supernatural mites that burrow under the skin. They’re extremely itchy, and after a time, will even cause patches of hair to fall out in a bugbear’s bear form, giving them a mangey appearance. These mites can impair a bugbear’s ability to cast illusions, making it difficult -- even impossible -- for them to feed properly. Over time this can lead to starvation and even death. Fortunately, scare-bies can be treated by special ointment made from mara blood and grounded up yeth hound tentacles. This smothers the mites until they crawl out of the skin. It’s important that every bit of infected skin is covered by the ointment otherwise the infection will spread once more.
Ursus Mane: More unpleasant and awkward than anything else, Ursus Mane is caused by a virus that affects hair growth. In bear form, afflicted bugbears are completely hairless, leaving their skin vulnerable to the elements and anyone who would do them harm. In human form, these unfortunate bugbears are covered in a thick coat of bear hair, resembling the most extreme cases of hypertrichosis. This can be treated with the use of supernatural steroids that gradually return the hair to its rightful form.
Kitsune:
Elemental Shifting: The kitsune will shift elements uncontrollably and without warning. This is particularly problematic not only to the kitsune but to others. i.e. A river kitsune suddenly with thunder powers would not know how to use their powers. The exact cause of the condition is not known, but it’s likely highly magical, and will typically resolve itself over time -- hopefully before something disastrously wrong happens.
Kitsunebi: Part of the mythological association between kitsune and will-o-wisps may stem from this relatively harmless ailment, wherein a kitsune who uses their powers very liberally may have will-o-wisps gravitate to their location. The wisps do not harm the kitsune, but it makes it hard to move inconspicuously. Refraining from using their magic for an extended period will cause the will-o-wisps to drift away over time.
Inari’s Void: The kitsune’s fox-shaped shadow takes on a “mind of its own” and begins attacking people in range, possibly even leading to peoples’ deaths. On some level, the shadow may be acting out the kitsune’s worst impulses. This seems to be brought on randomly in places with large amounts of spiritual or magical energy, especially if the energy is corrupted in some way. The effects linger even once the kitsune leaves the location, but they will dissipate on their own over time.
Lamia:
Medusa Trichoptilosis: The lamia begins to grow snakes on their head. They don't harm the lamia but could prove a nuisance, such as trying to bite a passerby. This condition may cause some sensory overload to the lamia as they’re now able to see, hear, and smell from multiple locations on their head, which can be disorienting. The snake heads must be painfully chopped off, and after the lamia’s next shed, all will be well.
Dysecdysis/Stuck Shed: If a lamia is not well-fed or exposes themselves to poor environmental conditions, they may have a hard time shedding their skin. This can cause the old skin to painfully adhere to the new one underneath, which looks pretty awful and is very uncomfortable for the lamia. Over time this corrects itself, but sometimes the new skin becomes somewhat damaged in the process.
Clogged Venom Glands: If a lamia doesn’t use their venom for too long, it may harden and clog inside of the gland. This is painful, and causes swelling in the face and neck. While the glands are swollen they can’t use their venom, and they may need some magical assistance to gradually free the glands.
Selkie:
Sensory Inversus: Caused by a parasite, Sensory Inversus makes the senses of the selkie become acute above ground, and dulled underwater. This results in increased light sensitivity, whiskers growing in human form, and overly sensitive hearing in human form. Additionally, this makes it dangerous for the selkie to be in seal form, because those senses are needed underwater. Specific potions made of mermaid fins can treat it.
The Skin Crawls: Selkies start experiencing an intense desire to wear someone else’s skin, usually not another selkie’s. It starts as a subconscious off-hand thought, then slowly grows over time until it's all encompassing. The feeling will go as soon as the selkie puts on someone else’s skin (...After carefully peeling it off their victim who will likely die). The other treatment would be using the skin from a well-formed mermaid.
“Donkeyskin”: Caused by a fungal infection that can get into the pelt if not cared for properly, making it fit weird, and causing the limbs to not all transform properly. This can feel strange in the water, and makes the selkie look a little like a mutant seal monster. While not necessarily painful, it is irritating and a little itchy when interacting with the selkie goo. The infection can be treated by soaking the skin in a bath made from warm water and selkie mucus for 15-24 hours. Should it be left untreated, the damage to the skin will be left irreversible.
Siren:
Witherwings: Sirens must be particularly careful about selecting their prey, otherwise they may face consequences. Many normal humans and other supernatural individuals can be carriers for Witherwings, which has no presenting symptoms in non-siren individuals. However, once a siren has consumed an individual with the virus, they will experience fever, itching, and discover that their feathers will begin to fall out. If not treated soon enough, a siren can permanently lose their feathers. Treatment for Witherwings include topical oils with bits of crushed phoenix feather.
Omnitone: A strange phenomena can occur where sirens lose the ability to control their mesmerizing musical abilities. Instead of being able to actively turn on their powers, sirens will find they are enthralling people with their speaking voice and those under their power are prone to dangerous levels of obsession. Drinking lemon tea mixed with eintykára honey is the common practice of getting rid of this affliction.
Mushmouth: (Teeth horror tw) Particularly messy eaters in the siren community should be aware of Mushmouth, a very annoying but minor disease of the mouth. Similar to cavities, too much accumulated iron will cause siren teeth to begin to rot and even fall out. A diet of only fae (as they don’t have iron blood) can allow them to avoid this condition. Mushmouth is easily avoided by regular flossing, brushing of teeth, and general dental hygiene. Once afflicted, sirens must refrain from eating flesh and rinse nightly with a brine made with mermaid scales.
Werewolf:
WereFleas: While werewolves may not be prone to dog fleas (the jury is out on that one) they do have their own flea species to worry about. If this mutant kind of flea bites a werewolf, an uncontrollable itch occurs. The fleas will live in the fur (or hair) of an individual and reproduce there, worsening the problem. If left untreated, this causes numbness in the areas of the bites. Strangely enough, this can be treated with regular dog/flea removal.
Úlfhéðnar: A rare disease stemming from wolfsbane consumption, the werewolf begins to feel the wolf within overshadowing their humanity, often getting the feeling that their human shape is ‘false’ or some fake skin they are ‘wearing.’ Their senses sharpen beyond the werewolf norm but animalistic behaviors, sometimes violent ones, begin to increasingly creep into their human life, and the onset can be quite rapid. This can go all the way to losing the capacity to understand human language, and walking on all fours. One of the better treatments for this is to proactively re-engage with human life, almost pushing away the wolf side as much as possible. This can be dangerous if the violent behaviors are already an issue, and may result in the werewolf losing touch with their wolf side around the full moon.
Osteolupinus: (Chronic illness tw) Wolves get afflicted with a joint and bone disorder which makes turning more painful than usual, and can result in imperfect transformations -- for example, the skin and musculature changing but not the bones, or vice versa. Not only is this painful, but it can inhibit movement, and can be an issue in either direction of the transformation. Can be treated by eating the bones of a bonedoggle, zombie, or banaspati.
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Queer novel recs
[A repost from my Patreon.]
By request of the one person who is pledging at a Patreon tier that lets them make meta/review requests of me, some recommendations for queer novels. Fiction-wise, I read pretty much exclusively science fiction and fantasy, with the occasional excursus into historical fiction, so that's what you're getting.
SF/F these days is, happily, getting queerer and queerer. As a general recommendation, a good place to start is the lists of winners and nominees of the Otherwise Award (formerly the Tiptree Award), which, according to their website, "encourages the exploration and expansion of gender." There's also the Lambda Literary Awards, which are awarded to both fiction and non-fiction LGBT books across various categories, including genre (mystery, romance, SF/F & horror). It's obviously not going to be a guarantee that you'll like any particular one of these books, but at least it means that somebody did.
A whole lot of the Hugo award nominees and winners this year coincidentally happened to be queer fiction, especially in the longer categories. The Best Novel winner, Arkady Martine's The Memory of Empire, is a sprawling space opera starring a diplomat who incidentally (very incidentally) happens to have some Feelings for her cultural liaison, and it's a really good book, anyway. I actually voted for Tamsyn Muir's Gideon the Ninth, which is billed as "lesbian necromancers in space," and it is pretty much exactly that. It's a murder mystery, which you'd think would be less mysterious in a book where half the characters are necromancers, but this doesn't actually help them much. I thought it was delightful and I have the sequel sitting here on my Kindle waiting for me to read it. But had Gideon not stolen my heart, I would have voted for Kameron Hurley's The Light Brigade. Everything else I have read by Hurley -- well, okay, that's just the Bel-Dame Apocrypha series, actually -- has starred kickass queer people, and this one's no exception. It's military SF in the vein of Starship Troopers or The Forever War with a really well-done time travel plot, in which the twists just keep coming. The narrator's gender is intentionally obscured for about 95% of the novel, and for added fun, they're bisexual. (Charlie Jane Anders' The City in the Middle of the Night also had queer characters but it didn't really grab me.)
(I have to admit I bounced off a lot of the Hugo novella nominees this year, including most of the queer ones, but Amal El-Mohtar & Max Gladstone's This Is How You Lose The Time War (lesbian time-travel agents) did win, although it wasn't really my thing, and Rivers Solomon's The Deep (lesbian mermaids) appears to have gone on to win this year's Lambda instead, although that one wasn't really my thing either. Becky Chambers's To Be Taught, If Fortunate also had some lesbians and I liked that a bit better, but none of those got my #1 vote.)
I have not read it yet and cannot vouch for it but my wife is reading N. K. Jemisin's new short story collection and she says they're very good and a lot of them are queer.
Okay. So. What about less recent queer SF/F, you ask?
I started reading SF/F in the mid-90s, and there wasn't a whole lot of queer SF/F out there in the mainstream SF market, so I imprinted pretty heavily on what there was that I could find, which was basically, at first, the blink-and-you'll-miss-it gay dragonriders of Anne McCaffrey's Pern series. Pern is what The Youth these days would probably call problematic in several ways, but there wasn't much else out there. I also then read Mercedes Lackey's Valdemar series, which is basically iddy iddy whump fic with magic telepathic animals who love you, so I'm not saying it's a complete literary masterpiece but Confused Baby Lesbian Sineala sure spent a lot of time wondering why she was identifying so very hard with Vanyel from the Last Herald-Mage trilogy. (I also really enjoyed Marion Zimmer Bradley's Darkover books, especially the ones about the Renunciates (the lesbian ones), Heritage of Hastur (the gay one), and The Forbidden Tower (the one where a telepathic orgy solves everyone's problems) but owing to the, uh, terrible things we all found out about MZB after she died, I don't think I can recommend them. Or read them ever again.
Other older queer SF/F that was beloved among my friend group: Ellen Kushner's Swordspoint and its sequels are about a duelist and his boyfriend and a lot of people liked this one, but I never liked it enough to keep up with all the sequels. The first few of Lynn Flewelling's Nightrunner books, however, punched me straight in the id; the protagonists are a pair of spies and thieves who are, more or less, this fantasy world's version of elves. There are a whole lot of grätúìtôūs dīåcrìtïcs and after the third book everything gets a little too horrific for me, but I really loved the first three.
But if I had to pick a top three list of authors who have written queer SF/F, this would be my list:
(1) Diane Duane. She is pretty much my favorite author ever, so I am biased here. I first discovered her work with her Star Trek tie-in novels (which, if you like Vulcans and Romulans, are amazing) and then her YA series Young Wizards, which is about teenagers who can do magic and use it to make the universe a better place and it's about ten thousand times more meaningful to me than Harry Potter ever was. But, anyway. She also has a fantasy series called The Tale of the Five, which is an everyone-is-bi-and-poly series started back before that kind of thing was even cool. Also there's a group marriage involving, like, six people, one of whom is a fire elemental. There are three books out in that series, she's still writing novellas set in it, and she swears that she's going to write the fourth and final book that we've been waiting about 25 years for.
(2) Melissa Scott. Everything I have ever read by Melissa Scott, either as a solo author or with her late partner Lisa Barnett, is queer as hell and has amazing worldbuilding. I first encountered her work when I randomly picked up Trouble and Her Friends (lesbian cyberpunk) at a used bookstore and ended up adoring it. Her other works include Shadow Man (set in a future where humanity has a whole lot more intersex people), The Kindly Ones (which has a protagonist whose gender is never specified), and The Armor of Light (alt-history involving Kit Marlowe and a demon). But my favorite series of hers is the Astreiant series, which is a Professionals AU with the serial numbers filed off, but they're filed off really well. It's a series of police procedural mysteries set in Fantasy Matriarchal Renaissance Netherlands, starring a m/m couple, and the fantasy gimmick here is that astrology is really real and really works. They're a lot of fun.
(3) Nicola Griffith. All of her books are about queer women. She has a few that are modern-day thrillers that I didn't so much care for, but I really love her SF. The first book of hers I read was Ammonite, about an anthropologist who gets sent to a planet of only women to try to figure out how they reproduce and ends up going native instead. I really adored it. I also remember really liking Slow River although I no longer remember the actual plot, except that the main character worked at a sewage facility. And it's historical fiction rather than SF, but she's probably most famous for Hild, a novel about Hilda of Whitby. I liked it a lot except for the part where it annoyed me that Griffith invented out of whole cloth the idea that women would have a special female companion and made up a name for it in Old English and everything, and most people who read the book probably believed it was a real thing. But, uh. I did really love Ammonite. I am so weak for planet-of-women books. (This is why I am so sad that I can't ever read the Renunciates of Darkover books again.)
That's about all I can think of right now. I hope some of those recs are, at the very least, new!
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hey so I agree with a lot of the stuff in your post about the transphobia involved in the origin of the pansexual label, but I just have one question: what are the actual impacts of people with good intentions calling themselves pan? If you don't hate pansexuals and consider them bi, why type up a paragraphs long manifesto on the harms of the origin of the label if it means the same thing in the way that most non transphobic people (your audience) use it? a lot of identities can be used in transphobic ways (like bi and lesbian and anything really) and plenty of valid identities from problematic roots and evolve over time as people use them differently (queer, transsexual). so how is a person with good intentions using a not-perfect label in a way you don't like a threat to the community? if someone is using the label pan transphobically, wouldn't their bigotry exist independently? if pan people do not act in transphobic ways besides using the label pansexual, realistically what is changing if they call themselves bi beyond holier-than-thou aesthetic activism? plus, a blog on the internet isn't going to get everyone to stop identifying as pansexual, especially considering multiple prominent celebrities ID as pan. so why spend all that energy quibbling on semantics because some bi people use a slightly different word when you could be worrying about Literally anything else? just feels like you want to find something to argue about lol. extremely disappointed that I had to break a mutual
im going to respond to each thing you bring up chronologically- im not trying to nitpick or prioritize certain things you say ill just forget things if i go out of order and i dont want to miss something important. ALSO! i will be typing less formally (like keysmashes and shortening words n stuff) in this response than my og post bc its 1am as im starting to type this so im tired but i want to be clear that i am like. taking this seriously and im not like. mocking u in anyway if it could read that way?? i hope not but just in case anyways here it goes!
in terms of actual impact people with good intentions identifying as pan: honestly im not sure the full scope of the impact this has, so ill only be speaking to what ive personally seen which might not be all. but like... id argue my younger self has good intentionals iding as pan. i wanted to support trans people, even if i didnt understand a lot of the nuance involved. as a result of this, i developed a sense of superiority over other bisexuals and a mentality that bisexuality was a primitive and lesser sexuality. that mentality is harmful, and although im not sure if it affected bisexuals around me (of which there are many most of my friends are bi ajfjfjf) its still a harmful mentality and can easily hurt people even if i specifically didnt. also using it even with good intentions, which i know many people have, still spreads and further normalizes a label that imo can not be separated from its transphobic origins. this effect is not as extreme as other forms of transphobia and biphobia by A LONG SHOT. the bi community faces a lot of other issues but that doesnt mean this one isnt worth addressing if that makes sense?
if i dont hate pansexuals: ik this is part of a larger point which i will adress but i specified this in my post bc i see a lot of other posts that are negative towards pansexuality have "i hate pan ppl" somewhere in it or a close equivalent. i do not shame these ppl for their anger, i just wanted to be clear i think a lot of pan ppl are bi ppl with good intentions choosing a label they dont fully understand based on a misunderstanding of bisexuality.
why write a paragraphs long manifesto on the harms of pansexuals origin: ok 😭😭 the real reason here is that im literally just bad at summarizing. like thats literally it. i also like talking, its a bad combination. plus ive been thinking abt this for like. over a year im not even kidding and just like i have a lot of thoughts and figured if i was going to bother making my own post instead of rbing someone elses that i might as well get everything i wanted to say off my chest. ALSO BTW i literally got an ask like a week ago that was several paragraphs long asking me to explain my thoughts on why pan was harmful and some other stuff so like. this is partially responding to that and partially just me wanting to air my grievances ? idk if thats the right expression 😔😔
why write the post if my audience of people who identify as pan arent doing it in a transphobic way ? again sorry i didnt really understand the phrasing so i hope this is a vaguely correct summary!! um but like... again imo i think pan cant be separated from its transphobia and like. again imo iding as pan is like. a transphobic action/choice? obviously one transphobic thing does mean someone necessarily is like officially a Transphobe (it CAN be depending on the action but i dont think that applies here) but that doesnt mean there arent problems with what they did. this is like very complicated, but like. someone doing something harmful without the knowlege that its harmful doesnt make that person a bigot by any means it just means they didnt know. and i feel thats the case here? a lot of ppl (myself included until recently) know next to nothing abt pansexualitys origins so a trans inclusve sexuality might seem like a safe and good bet just because they dont know too much abt it, and like? i cant hate those people cause that was me for 5+ years and djgjfjdj you just dont know what you dont know!
basically i think iding with a transphobic label is inherently a singular transphobic action that doesnt make the person transphobic by itself, but is still a transphobic instance.
a lot of identities can be used in transphobic ways like bi, lesbian, etc.: this is true and a point i attempted to make on my original post, but i might not have clear enough. my issue with pan is specifically that it is a transphobic response to a preexisting identity. lesbian isnt an attempted trans inclusive indentity that replaced an identity that already existed (which have many trans ppl identifying with the og label). transphobes can use whatever labels they want, but transphobes using a label vs a label having a transphobic origin is very different. bigots use inclusive and supporting language for their bigotry all the time but language that originated with that bigotry is worse.
many valid identities stem from problemstic origins (like transsexual and queer) but the words evolve: ok my paraphrasing is a little weird there. anyways. the thing here is that. those are slurs. reclaimed slurs that can be empowering to many people, yes, but slurs nonetheless. reclaiming a slur is taking a harmful word and wearing it as a badge of pride. first off, pansexual is not a slur (ur not implying that in anyway just. saying) and it isnt being reclaimed when people dont treat it as having harmful origins. transsexual is the way some people identify but ppl acknowlege its a slur and originates from transphobia. ppl love to act like queer isnt a slur, which is an issue in and of itself, but just. factually it has historically and is currently being used against ppl with the intent to hurt them. pansexual isnt on the same level as these and other words like the f slur, d slur, etc. pansexual originates from trans and biphobia WITHIN the community and not outside of it, and most pansexuals dont see themselves as reclaiming the title because they dont think anythings wrong with it in the first place. and reclaiming it just seems unnecessary considering its history? theres no empowerment from using pan as a label as opposed to queer or transsexual, and it just divides the bisexual community for no reason.
how is a person using a not-perfect label a threat to the community? ok i dont think its a threat but still an issue if that difference makes sense? id like to reiterate a few things ive said before, but for me personally, it made me look down on bisexuals and see them as lesser, and it made people around me see pan as the "trans inclusive" sexuality as opposed to bisexuality, and basically its usage just leads to further biphobia. is this the worst of biphobia? no!!! but its still biphobia and why not attempt to target and minimize that? i have no way to singlehandedly stop biphobia, but my post might get through to my friends who id as pan and that small thing is better than nothing.
if someone used the pan label in a transphobic way, wouldnt that bigotry be different from people using it not transphobically?: someone claiming all bi ppl are transphobic and only pan is the acceptable label is obviously a lot worse than someone iding as pan and saying bi/pan solidarity but again, the second isnt not an issue because the first one is a bigger issue, its just a smaller issue in comparison. i wouldnt say the bigotry is different, one is just worse than the other, but it still has the same problems.
if pan people dont do anything transphobic other than id as pan then what changes with iding as bi over pan other holier-than-thou activism: its just one less person using a transphobic label? which isnt that big but it might lead to their friends stopping iding as pan and cause fewer people around them to see bi as a transphobic identity. which is small scale stuff, i wont try to blow it out of proportion, but thats still a step in the right direction and hopefully more people follow with it. its not terribly huge or lifechanging but something small that may only affect the people close to you is still something rather than nothing.
a blog the internet isnt going to get people to stop iding as pan: oh absolutely not. honestly i expected to get unfollowed/blocked more than change peoples minds regarding the pan label (im surprised i only lost two followers so far honestly) but again, someone literally asked me to do this and i wanted to be clear on my stance on the label, since in the past ive been supportive of it. im not expecting the post to get more than five likes, its more directed to my followers rather than the internet as a whole. im not expecting a large impact, im hoping to change the minds of my followers and friends who id as and support the pan label. thats it. if something bigger comes from it- great! but thats not what im aiming to do.
prev point + many prominent celebrities id as pan: the first name that comes to mind is someone im not a fan of for separate reasons but thats irrelevant. i mean im repeating myself a bit but some celebrities in the past validated and made me feel excited abt my identity as a pan person when they came out, and it justified the label to me, even when i had doubts. i have never interacted with a celebrity and do not plan to change their minds abt their identity. again, my post was for my friends and followers and maybe who ever was scrolling through the biphobia tag and decided to read my post.
why spend that much energy worrying abt the pan label instead of something else: ive spent waaaaay more energy thinking abt a singular meme i didnt like regarding my favourite rwby character so like. maybe i just overreact to things lol. maybe i have a lot of energy and since i cant talk my friends ears off abt my favourite fruits or the different voting methods i learned in my math class or what would dreams taste like, then i gotta put my energy into something. idk. i have a lot of energy and honestly? this didnt take that much. but i felt it weighing on me as my friends talked positively abt the pan label, when i felt guilty for the superiority i felt over my bi friends INCLUDING my best friend and favourite person in the world so like. i spent enough energy worrying abt it, and like. in hindsight since its been over 12 hours since posting it, im thinking abt it less. i was more worried abt feeling dishonest with my friends than actually worrying abt pansexuality, but i figured i owed them an explanation for why my feelings around it had changed.
just feels like you want to find something to argue about: okay i DO love arguing but im not pulling this out of my ass for fun. its in response to posts ive seen on my dash, asks i recieved abt pansexuality, and my way of letting people know my views have changed and why since i know at least some people are curious.
i am sorry to lose a mutual as well, and i genuinely hope things go well for you, but uh yeah thats that.
again, if people have further questions im willing to answer them i just might take a while bc i have school and other stuff 2 do but uhhh yea sorry if im clogging ur dash sjfjfkkf
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