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#the missing shade is going to bother me so much lol
nonetoon · 2 years
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Week 3 Caught-on-Tober batch!
(Also please ignore some of the black shading around the letters missing I currently have no means to fix it at the moment 😭)
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ponderingmoonlight · 12 days
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Realizing your true feelings for Gojo after he stands up for you
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Pairing: Gojo x fem!reader
Word Count: 1,4k
Synopsis: You told yourself countless times that you aren't able to like Gojo Satoru, that he is nothing but a jerk. Until he stands up for you, until he shows you what he really thinks of you...
Warnings: literally wrote this in my break at work so don't come for me lol, fluff fluff fluff, reader getting insulted
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Oh, how much you hate the way basically everyone looks at you. Well, not technically you, to be exact. It’s rather the person walking next to you who drowns in attention every time you are forced to go out together.
Not that you’d understand the hype. Gojo Satoru, the blessed one, the honored one, the strongest fucking jujutsu sorcerer of your lifetime.
“What’s wrong? Feeling left out, (y/n)?”
And probably the biggest pain in your ass.
“You’re such a whore for attention it hurts”, you bite back while rolling your shaded eyes the way you always do the second he opens his mouth.
His laughter vibrates through your body, annoys you to the core. When will this madness finally come to an end? When will they finally begin to send you onto missions with Geto, Yu or fuck, even Nanami? Why on earth does it always have to be him?
“Caught me there I guess. But it’s not my fault that I’m easy to look at. Not like you.”
You force yourself to take a deep breath in and out, to calm your tingling nerves and stop your fist from twitching. That fucker has some really good nerves. Only the sound of his name next to you simply drives you insane, let alone his stupid comments and oh too annoying voice. Is there really anything good on Gojo Satoru, something you might like?
“I hate you”, you hiss through gritted teeth.
“Aww, don’t be like that, (y/n). We both know that isn’t true”, he purrs, ready to grab your shoulder when you yank away.
“I’ll break your fucking nose if you touch me, jerk.”
“I’d love to see you try, princess.”
“I’ve never seen you around here.”
The sudden soft female voice that interrupts your rambling catches you off guard.
There she stands, an undeniable beauty with curves in just the right places and blonde hair that looks like strands of gold. The bluest eyes, the most breathtaking smile. And of course, her gaze is fixated on Satoru.
“That’s because it’s my first time here. After all, my eyes definitely wouldn’t have miss someone like you”, he replies with that cheeky grin you know oh too well, the cheeky grin that makes your blood boil in an instant.
Really? This is probably the worst time to start a flirty conversation. You were sent here to detect a special grade curse, to save this damned city from getting scorched. But he? He has nothing but her blonde hair and delicate smile in his pea brain
“Don’t you think that this isn’t the right time for a conversation like that?”, you mumble irritably.
“We’re just having a little talk. Who are you, his girlfriend? I highly doubt that. A girl like you would never have a chance with a guy like him.”
You have to blink a few times when her sugary voice spits at you with pure venom.
It shouldn’t bother you. Why would it? Gojo is the last person walking on earth you’d be in a relationship with, the last person who would ever want you. You, with your average looks. You, being a grade 2 sorcerer who has nothing special to offer. You, who never actually allowed herself to like Gojo. You, who is nothing compared to the woman standing in front of you.
Then why do her words feel like a knife in your heart? Why are you standing there like an idiot, sunglasses barely covering your pain? Why does his presence next to you suddenly sting so badly?
“Pretty disgusting words for someone with that face. Do you really think the world belongs to you because you look good? Let me tell you something: Apart from being hot, (y/n) is also unremarkable smart, astute and sarcastic. Someone as simple-minded as you should better avoid me. Now get lost, will you?”
What.
On.
Earth.
Did Gojo Satoru really stand up for you? No, did Gojo Satoru just call you “hot, unremarkable smart, astute and sarcastic”? Your heart almost beats out of your chest, pounding so roughly against your ribcage that you feel like fainting any given minute. A cruel storm of butterflies almost causes your guts to turn, makes you see stars. Are you dreaming, maybe? This can’t be reality. It’s impossible that-
“Hey, are you okay? I hope you don’t trust that stinky girl”, Gojo speaks out softly.
You can sense the way he eyes you up and down through his sunglasses, the little pout on his face revealing that he’s truly worried. Is that really the boy who teases you until you lose your mind completely? God, how much you hate him, how much you want to punch him into his stupid perfect face.
You let out the breath you didn’t know you were holding. But what is that little part of your brain that almost dies in excitement, then? What are those strange butterflies that never invaded you since you joined Jujutsu High?
“Hey, look at me.”
Your eyes dart upwards, get greeted by his bright blue orbs that look down at you in a seriousness you’ve never seen before.
“Tell me you don’t believe her.”
“She said nothing I don’t already know”, you reply dryly.
He shakes his head, still staring down at you with furrowed eyebrows. Who is this guy? What are those feelings? Why aren’t you able to look away like you always do? Gojo is only playing with you the way he does constantly. His bright blue orbs aren’t to be trust and you know it.
“I would choose you a hundred times before someone like her, (y/n).”
It’s like all life drained from your body, blank eyes staring at him in shock. This really has to be a dream. When was the last time Gojo has been nice to you? Probably never. He constantly teases you, drives you inane, makes you mad, makes you regret your decision to come to Jujutsu High and also…
Makes you feel save, makes you feel good about yourself, makes you feel affection.
Affection? For Gojo?
“I…I have to go”, you blurt out so abruptly that you almost trip over your own feet while trying to haste away.
He’s only picking on you like he always does. Gojo Satoru, considering a romantic relationship with you? You huff out loud, cheeks redden by the sheer thought of the dumb look you gave him. You aren’t better than the girls you despise so much, after all. He truly managed to wrap you around his finger like everyone else, even though you told yourself over and over to hate him.
What a pathetic jerk you are.
You spin around so fast you almost fall over, only to get caught in a pair of strong arms.
“You don’t believe me”, Gojo notes while keeping you in place.
“Why would I?”, you press out, not daring to look at him once again.
You need to get away from this cursed place, away from the honored one. It’s time to go back to normal, back to hating him with all your heart. Because this is all he is, right? Gojo Satoru is nothing but your rival…right?
“Maybe I can convince you with something else.”
Just when you’re about to protest and freeing yourself, he pulls you even closer and presses his lips against yours.
Time stands still, the lenses of your sunglasses pressing so violently against Gojo’s skin that they crack.
This.
This is the stuff your wildest dreams are made of, a dream you didn’t even allow yourself to think about. If there’s one thing that always seemed impossible to you, it was this. Why would you ever be more than Gojo’s rival, what is the purpose of seeing anything apart from a pain in the ass in him?
This right here.
Out of instinct, you wrap your arms around him as well, pull him closer and closer, take in his delicious scent. The sheer feeling of his lips collapsing into yours leaves you breathless, makes your lungs ache in the urge for air.
Until he lets go of you while panting hard, now glowing eyes fixated on you so intimidating that you feel yourself blushing.
“Believing me know?”
“You stained my sunglasses”, you breathe out mindlessly.
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If you could write a little thing with fem!tav and astarion where tav brings up the topic of having children? Just would love to see what you do with it and how Astarion would react, etc!
@dexpairs-blog asked: Could i request Astarion reacting to tav babying the owlbear cub and Scratch 24/7? Like baby talk, holding them like babies, playing with them and showering them with all their attention as soon as they set foot in the camp
pspsps what if i made it painful lol
Rated: M
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He has no particular interest in children. They are bothersome needy creatures that he has no intention of entertaining. Astarion never understood why you like them so much, brats all of them. The time you give such caring words to the tieflings children, helped Mol out of her contact, to let some kid stay at the camp because the kid's mommy was missing.
Astarion didn't see the point but did see how you interacted with children, this gentle side of you with the bright smile he enviously wants only for him.
The Vampire Ascendant does not need to be. He already owns your body and mind.
You currently are watching Scratch run around playing with the kids in the park, your sweet giggles as the two children pretend to be heroes fighting imaginary villains with their fearsome battle dog! The owlbear is in the Crimson Palace enjoying his afternoon nap after being fed. Astarion is usually with him, you notice he has grown closer to it in recent years.
"Little love," You jump when he wraps his arms around you, "Enjoying your toys?" It… Bothered you long ago by what he calls everyone you have a harmless interest in (or interact with) toys, which is a step up from being cattle (not by much). You long ago stopped trying to convince him otherwise.
"The children are enjoying themselves. Scratch is going to sleep well tonight." You speak as kisses are placed on your exposed back, his arms pulling you closer, "Astarion," It is hard not to squirm as he hums with minor acknowledgment and seeks you out physically. Luckily you are hidden under a shaded tree while the children are pretty far from your secluded spot. "Not here." Denying him is impossible, both because he won't be denied and because you need him.
"I promised you a decade in each other's arms," resting his chin on your shoulder with eyes closed, "Yet, here you are outside without me." Hurt. Astarion seeks you out like a shark to blood, he fiends for you in a way you never thought possible.
The ascension changed him, you remind yourself.
"Soon," Tilting your head against his, "Allow me to stay a little longer."
One might think he wants time away from him.
When you pull away, your warmth leaving him, your hand catches his, "Come." You tug for him to follow.
When darkness falls, when the streets fall silent, the taverns are full; he has you close to him. Normally, he would go hunting to bring prey to feed you however tonight he does not leave your side. Laying next to one another in the bed, your eyes looking into his.
The conversation comes up over a petty argument and you still feel the tears on your cheeks.
"A child?"
"Yes, our own." You place his hand on your stomach, "We can make one. Father," The title spoken with some defeat, "Granted me that ability."
Astarion is aware, Kanchelsis gave his blessing for his beast child to be the consort of the Ascendant.
"Now why would you want a little bugger running around here? Isn't babying that dog and owlbear of yours enough?
The day you found that dog, Gods above, you refused to leave the camp until Lae'zel dragged you out. Then the owlbear! Halsin was not a damn help as he also pet the creature too.
Strange, he misses those chaotic days at times… Especially Gale.
"Mine," With a raised eyebrow, "Says the vampire who cuddles with said owlbear when it is having a nightmare." The indignant look he gives you makes you chuckle, "I only brought it up because…" His hand on your stomach slides up your chest until it reaches your face, a sad face. "Family with you… I dream of it. Of us."
He can see them, though the tadpole is long gone, the vampire can peer into your mind. Share thoughts and feelings between the bond of master and spawn— Lovers. The dreams are vivid, he can hear and picture the child that looks like him but shares parts of you too.
A family.
Your mind feels him sneer, the dislike, the fear. The fear of being a terrible father, be like how Cazador was with his family—turning and enslaving them.
"Astarion," Staring up as he moves to pin you down, "Ah!" Biting your neck and drinking from you.
"Ask me for anything and it will be yours," His lips bloodied, "This however I can't."
You are disappointed but you understand Astarion may never be in the right mindset to have a family. Too much trauma that though you tried helping him, it festers in him never to truly heal.
His forehead rests on yours, his fingers intertwined with yours keeping your hands pinned down above your head.
Sex is different this time. Of course, it feels good– Great, but this time he entertained something you hadn't expected him to do. "You... Don't have… Astarion, you don't need to." The way he fucks you is as if he was going to breed a child into you. As if every round is driven with the intention of seeing your stomach swell with his child.
It is a fantasy he entertains, speaking the filthiest words as you cry out for him. Maybe he is trying to make up to you for his rejection, you don't know. You do know after, in the silence of the aftermath, as you play with his messy white curls, his hand rubs your stomach.
A longing that he cannot ever give you this one desire.
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fire-but-ashes-too · 9 months
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(Writerblr) intro post!
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Hi! welcome to my blog! this is my (very late) writerblr/general/artblr intro, or just somewhere with all my general informations :)
please, go on and read *bows*
☆ Ash is my name on here and i go by she/her
★ Im a teen writer and artist, but i dream of acting
☆ im from italy
★ pan ace and quoiromantic (or wtfromantic its the same) (im still kinda questioning tho??? probs demiromantic??? idk?? feelings r weird atm)
☆ entp and introvert
★ im always up for tag games or stuff like that :)
☆ recently added tags! #ash writes- my writing ofc #ash and her rants- just me talking abt random stuff could be anything serious or not #ash on fire- probs me fangirling over something lol i may get overexcited beware
★ i relate to a spiritual and psychological level to black cats and all theur other forms (aka regulus black, tori spring, aristotle mendoza etc etc etc)
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i mostly write fantasy or fanfiction, but sometimes i engage in various genres as mystery, dystopian or surrealism :)
★ So I've been scheming like a criminal ever since
genre: fanfiction
audience: general/ teen and up
tropes: rivals to lovers, college AU, slow burn, a lot of fencing, paris✨
cw/tw: past rape/non con, ptsd, homophobia, wounds/blood
progress: i try to update every week but nothing's promised 🥲
snippet here:
Years ago he’d learned to mask his handwriting, so now he could easily forge any handwriting he wanted, if he was given a good example of it being used. There was something extremely interesting in how each person connected two letters to each other. How they wrote an “ar” was different from how they would write an “or”, how much the words were apart from each other and how much pressure they put in the paper told a lot about someone, to him it was like zodiac signs. He didn’t always have to copy other handwritings, not unless he wanted to throw the blame on that person. He just had to invent a brand new writing style, and be careful to not slip his between the cracks. And that’s exctly what he did in the letter. Before Jesper could finish his monologue about how much he had missed out in the past few months holed up in his office, a blackmail threat was ready to be closed inside the paper envelope, just the signature was missing, but he didn’t bother to add it. A proper threat always had to be anonymous, it was always better to give as little information you could. Everything could be used against you. The maroon wax sealed the opening with a satisfying fizzling and a single wisp of smoke. The clock chimed on the wall, it was already 6 pm, he had to go finish some assignments.
(previously titled: questionable decisions)
☆ The Rogue
genre: fantasy, dystopian
audience: teen and up
setting: a fantasy world im currently busy (trying) building
progress: just vibes really, two mainc characters, a couple sides and an outline plus one of the first chapters, not much really but im working on it
characters:
anne: the rogue from where i took the title.
shes a 17 y/o girl who lives in a bunker in a forest, on the run from the government as she's a "high traitor and liar who must be destroyed".
she has the ability to modify her face and appereance for a while and she has a prosthetic arm connected to her virtual friend Indigo.
thanks to it she's able to teleport and keep track of various things.
alexander: the son of the dictator, he's lived his life in a bubble until 2 years ago, when he finally managed to get more social contacts with people and (slightly) catch up on what he's missed, behind his father's back of course.
he meets anne when she's captured and figures she's his best shot at escaping his father domain.
snippet:
This time, she materialised in the shadows behind a bulding, which gave her enough cove for her to shift her facial features. Her nose a little bigger, her hair some shades brighter, her eyes more elongated and greener than the grass growing outside her doorstep and a splash of freckles to top it all off. It was way harder to do it without a mirror, and way more dangerous. For all she knew, she could’ve been looking like a girl with a fish head, and she didn’t know if that would be better or worse than looking like herself. Anne took out a hat and a silk scarf, she wrapped it around her neck and jumped in a group of tourists gazing at the city. In no time she was in the square, vendor’s stands circling her, colourful flags waving in the wind. She could’ve stayed like that for ever, stuck in the memories of her old life, but she knew it couldn’t last forever.
★ Flowers and Homicide
genre: mystery
audience: general
cw/tw: blood, dead bodies, autopsies
main character: Giada
she's a forensics student who one day stumbles (metaphorically) over a dead body in her neighbour's lawn and starts investigating.
progress: actually finished but in italian sadly so in the translation process
☆ Confessions of a timeless man
genre: short story, surrealistic
audience: teen and up
content warning: suicide attempt, suicidal thoughts, depression
plot summary: a man is stuck living the same day over and over, after almost 10 years there, he tries to escape his curse by killing himself
progress: completed XD
(here's my ao3 btw)
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you want to know more about me! why than you, here you go!
★ my favourite artists are Taylor Swift, Conan Gray, Arctic Monkeys, Chase Atlantic, Marina, Lana del Rey, Sabrina Carpenter, Mother Mother and Billie Eilish (theres more but i cant remember whoops)
☆ i have a veryyyy slight synesthesia
★ other than writing, art-ing and reading i love baking/cooking and crocheting
☆ theatre kid over here, always up for screaming my lungs out
★ uhhh im a vegetarian
☆ i know a scary amount about death and murder (especially poisons)
★ i dont have a specific vibe, it usually changes every few months or so
☆ i probably have anxiety but ive never been to therapy so idk 💀
★ always up for fangirling :3 (im in too many fandoms *cries* buuut im most active on pjo, marauders, grishaverse and osemanverse, musicals and some books that i have boards for on my pinterest :D)
☆ i am terribly scared of insects, needles and dogs
★ my (quite unusual) sport is aerial dance, a circus speciality that looks really cool but is acctually really painful
☆ my pinterest, spotify and goodreads if by some reason you're really interested in the chaotic human being that i am :)
thank you for reading this farrr🥹🥹
have a great day/night/life/existence/other :D
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veintrry · 1 year
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for us.
how would they spend the new year's with you?
characters included are: wanderer, xiao, and, kazuha.
an: had to rewrite this one so many times lol BUT HAPPY NEW YEARS EVERYBODY!! I STILL HAVE 4 HOURS TO GO 4.2wrds
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THE PUPPET
To even get to spend this day with you was something he didn't take for granted. The puppet had never celebrated such things and he knew you had many friends and many people who must've asked you to spend your time at their events or that kind of sort, and yet you denied them knowing he'd be waiting for you, as he always is.
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It was already clear as day who you were going to spend the day with. He didn't even bother asking you because he was so sure of it. He didn't take you out to a huge party or do something extravagant as your friends would be doing. No, rather, he wants to enjoy this day with you in silence, just the two of you.
"Your hand." He says with his outstretched to you, and you are quick to make contact. It's become natural for you both, to the point he welcomes your affection. Still, he never initiates it first most of the time, so you had immediately taken note of your behaviour.
His hold on your hand is gentle but protective. He wants to feel all of your warmth pressed against his palm and he doesnt hide it.
"Keep your eyes closed." He tells you, as he begins walking beside you, his hand guiding you as you move. You've with hesitance and he doesn't miss it, it's kind of hard not to. "What, don't tell me you don't trust me? I won't let you walk into a tree..." He spoke before pausing as though thinking to himself, "Maybe." The wanderer shrugs, and he chuckles as he sees the way you furrow your brows at him finding amusement in your sweet reactions.
You haven't a clue where he was taking you, but he was always the kind to let you see for yourself so you didnt bother asking in the first place, you merely obliged with whatever he told you.
Kunikuzushi had always opted to have you for himself rather than being surrounded by others celebrating such things. He didn't see the reason why he should let others have the gift of having you around as if he should share you. To him, you were everything, and he doesn't hesitate to claim you as being his and thst was clear by how he seemingly glared at anyone who wished to ask you to spend such an important day with you.
Important day to humans, he means. He didn't see any value in it himself seeing how he has lived long enough to likely see multiple generations of your family. But, since you seemed to care for it, he'd indulge in it. In fact, he'd make it the best every year so you'd think of him whenever you look back.
You feel him come to a stop and sense his other hand slithering onto your shoulder as he has his face beside the side of your head.
"Open your eyes." His voice was a whisper at your ear, resounding in your mind. You could feel his warm breath against the shell of your ear, and even after he went silent you could still sense the tingles.
Pushing those thoughts to the back of your mind the best you can, you do as instructed, And god, it was, it was just beautiful. Beyond that.
The inazuman sky was painted a dark violet, such a deep shade that it left you tantalised by it, as though it captivated both your heart and soul. Gushes of crisp cold air passed against your face as you felt strands of his hair brush against your cheek.
It was empty. There were no stars to be found in the scenery, they had seemingly vanished. And yet, you didn't complain about that. No, you found yourself admiring the serene silence of there being nothing but you two and the space above you.
The wanderer recalls an interaction you two once had when he had inquired about your living space in your teapot, how despite having so much free room most of the islands had been empty. To this, you answered him saying that there was beauty in the emptiness, and you did not feel the need to fill the place up to the brim to give it a sense of home.
That has stuck with him ever since. To him, to a puppet he somehow found that such words struck to such a point that he felt tears well up in his eyes, but he had blinked them away quickly before you could notice and had merely apologised for judging your decision. The fact you somehow managed to appreciate the emptiness, the lack of anything, he adored that. And he began to wonder if you saw him that way? But, eventually he realised, you could never do that. You saw him as a person, despite his actual form. You insisted upon viewing him as a human, for to you a human was not merely a species but a way of behaving, and he fit the criteria perfectly, more than he'd like to admit.
Scaramouche kept his gaze locked onto you, watching your every reaction. How your eyes widened, your orbs glistening like a cheery kid or someone who had discovered a piece of themselves they never knew they had. How the darkness brought it's own light to illuminate onto you, shaping your features, bringing them out clearly as though the sky itself has chosen you as it's star, shining a spotlight onto you. How your lips parted slightly in awe at the sight before you, how their softness was simply taunting.
When you peered over to him, his head rested on your shoulder, you found that his eyes were still stuck on your lips, and the corner of your mouth lifted into a smug look causing him to make eye contact with you again, no longer distracted.
"What's with that look?"
"You want to kiss me so bad." You teased, giggling at his behaviour. Kunikuzushi rolled his eyes at you. God, how he loathed you sometimes.
His response came in scowl he gave you, with a welcoming threat, "Watch your tongue." "Bet you wanna do that yourself." He let out an exhausted sigh. "You are insufferable." You knew he loved you for it though. You held onto his hand even tighter and he couldn't deny that he loved it. He wanted to just melt into your arms right now, but not yet.
"Thank you, Kuni. Really, thank you."
"What are you thanking me for? We haven't even gotten started."
You gave him a puzzled look as he began moving forward to the edge of the high cliff alongside you, taking a seat and pulling you down with him.
This was it, this was what he was planning all along. He spent a lot of time on this and honestly? He was starting to feel his nerves catch up to him.
Kuni wasn't exactly an expert on what to do when trying to wow someone or make them have a good memory, so all he had to work off of were the memories you gave him, and why he recalls them so fondly. He only had one shot. Sure, he had next year, but he wanted to make your first new years together memorable.
You see his lips move, mouthing something seemingly to himself, and you wstch him intently trying to figure out what he is doing. Three,
"Kuni?" Your voice echoed in the back of his head, buried beneath his intense focus.
two,
You wanted to try and poke him and ask what he was counting down for, sure you knew it was dark out and it's likely around the time when the fireworks go off, but- Wait. There's no way he actually? "Kuni, what are you-"
one.
Soft.
So soft.
You blinked as your mind attempts to register what just occurred.
It felt like there was an explosion inside of you, like something just went off. You hear bangs and spot flashes of lights but you can only focus on how they illuminate Kunikuzushi's face. His eyes especially. Those orbs that are piercing through you, with a stare so intense, observing all your reactions, searching for the signs of your joy, as though expecting to see the moment when this is engraved into your mind.
His hand is on your jaw, his thumb rubbing the line of it, keeping you still as he kisses you passionately. To say you were surprised would be an understatement, but once you come to your senses, you welcomed it, pushing further into the kiss as you feel your heart thump out of your chest.
His hands wrapped around your waist, his thumb rubbing circles on your back. And he ensures that you arent the only one who'll remember this for eternity. No, he wishes to remember how you feel forever. Lest he forgets you'll be there to remind him.
Then, he abruptly pulls away. You chase after his lips again as though letting him slip from you will cause him to be gone forever. kissing him feverishly once more but for much shorter now as he departs from you again, truthfully missing you. Although, a cocky smirk lay bare on his lips. "Demanding more? You're needy."
To say he was amused was not hard to tell. He clearly adored you when you were like this, wanting him, needing him. To him, there wasn't a sweeter sight, because at the end of the day it revealed that in fact his feelings are reciprocated.
"Shut up." You shoot, wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling him back to you, allowing the puzzles of your mouths to meet again, fitting together perfectly. And it feels as though reuniting with a missing link, like an electric shock had been sent into your body, reviving you to reality and god, you wish to stay here forever.
To think he'd do all this. He must've staked out the area, remembered the exact time, hell, he would have counted down every second it took you to get here. He did all of this for you. All of it.
He had found a place for only the two of you, with the most phenomenal view, and yet you were to busy kissing him to care. As much as he liked that, he wanted you to remember this.
He pulled you away from him, speaking as he let out an airy chuckle, "You can always kiss me latee, you know? But this," He gestured towards the scenery ahead. "this isn't something you'll see often."
And as he finished, you rested your head on his shoulder, savouring the moment. Gazing at the sight he so carefully planned for you. You don't know how you even managed it but you wouldn't ask, not yet. For now, all you wanted was sto continue feeling the warm emitting from his embrace and just melt into the moment.
The cold air, the sound of your heart, his hands intertwined with yours, the fireworks blistering with blazing hues. You didn't know what was causing the life inside of you, him or these fires.
Maybe they had found way to your heart, their heat licking at the insides of your heart whenever you were near him.
Archons, you were too in love.
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THE YAKSHA
Have you ever wondered where to the yaksha goes during the beginning of the new year? You knew he mostly kept to himself, this was nothing new, but you and he had attained a close relationship, you managed to breach his boarders and he allowed himself to trust again even knowing that there might be consequences.
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You always knew where to find him, you needn't call his name for you to encounter him. You've become familiar with his habits of hiding in high places and his tendency to move quietly. You've also come to know his favourite spots, so when you go to Wangshuu Inn, heading directly for the rooftop highest up, you aren't surprised when you see him there, peering over Liyue as he is sat on the wooden railing.
You don't need to greet him for him to know you are here, he acknowledged your presence the moment he spotted you down at the entrance of the Inn, at the restaurant below.
"You look lonely. Not going to the festival?" By now the place would be crowded with people, from children, teens, fatuus, and foreigners. Who wouldn't want to experience the life of a new year, the chance of a new being? It seemed Xiao didn't. More so, he felt he wasn't needed for it. A yaksha, hanging around mortals. Surely the kids would crowd him, yanking on his hair. You giggled at the thought.
"I presume the same events will occur at this Lantern Rite." As you are about to say something, he turns your head to cut you off, "If you intend to ask me to join you at the festival then there is no need. I don't have an interest in participating in those activities." Looking back at the azul sky that wraps around Teyvat like a thick blanket.
"Actually, that's where you're wrong." He lets out a hum, "What is it you are here for then?" You rest your arms on the railing, smiling up at him and he feels his worries ease. "I just wanted to watch the fireworks with you, right here." There's a silence that follows, before he registers your words. "I see." He comments. "In that case a better view would be preferred." In an instant you find that you are pulled into his embrace as he now stands, and you feel an odd sensation overcome you before you blink to find yourself atop the Inn.
You quickly came to the conclusion he merely altered the both of you here, but you were still shocked and due to the slanted roof you found yourself gripping onto him.
"Do not worry. You won't fall, I'm right here." He does fond amusement in how you latch onto him but moves aside to give room for you, and helps you sit yourself down. Eventually you find a good balance and manage to ease up. "Do you do this all the time?" It was a dumb question on your part, considering how you've always seen him hanging off somewhere. "I do. I think it's more enjoyable to gaze at the scenery than simply waste time." You hum in acknowledgement.
It must be tiring for him, especially today. Despite it being a special day he still has to worry about anyone in risk.
"Why is it that you came to me?" The yaksha asked cutting the silence in twine. You pondered over the question. "Hmm, I just, wanted to see you?" You could feel the way his gaze strengthens and when you look at him he seems to be trying to understand what you mean as though there was an underlying meaning. "You are quite simple." "And you are too. Not everything has to be complex." It was partly a lie on your end. Nothing was easy with Xiao but you'd think it'd be more assuring to be told it is.
"Thank you," And his face evidently softens. "For keeping me company." You pull your legs to your chest and reach for his hand and despite his surprise at first he allows it, he lets you hold onto it as you trace patterns onto his glove. "You don't have to thank me. I'm the one who's glad to have you here." You bring his hand closer to your face, and as you keep your eyes on him you kiss the centre of his defined hand before settling it down on your knee.
Xiao merely watches you, there is slight unexpectance at your actions, but as the fireworks begin to go off he doesn't find his head turning towards the sound, rather he inches closer to you, raising both your hands back to the center, hovering in the air, as he leans in closer to you. Now that he was nearer to you you could observe thr curls of his lashes, the messiness of his hair locks and the deep hues of his eyes, and you are lost in intimate eye contact as he says nothing to you. But you feel him moving closer, and you anticipate him.
You don't care to glance at the fireworks, only perceiving the ones far off in the distance or the ones being let off by children. Your focus was on him, your noses grazing each other and then. Then you couldn't wait longer, and you leaned into him closing the distance as you desperately wanted. You hold onto his hand tighter and close your eyes as you feel him, memorising the softness of his lips.
It was a foreign feeling, but the discovery made your heart blossom. He inched closer to you, his other hand hovering over your back, hesitant at first before pushing aside his worries to savour the moment and the sensations he felt. The sensation of life within him. And he kissed deeper into you, craving it more than he ever did.
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THE WANDERING SAMURAI
A samurai may wander many places with his sword, and he becomes used to having many different homes. But where is it that this wandering leaf wishes to find himself during such an important time? He was sure the winds would answer him correctly, and you only proved that to him.
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Walking through multiple trees you internally curse yourself for not simply climbing one and opting to find the swordsman that way. However, you knew that: One, you weren't in the mood to be sweating, and second, you were more than certain this was intentional. Kazuha must've planned this for you knowing how you are just a tad bit more impatient than he is.
You inhale a long breath and hold it, attempting to relax yourself. Then, you exhale. You continue moving, allowing your limbs to loosen and resting your mind, not thinking so hard about what path you should take. You allowed your body to lead you, and to your surprise you found it was more enjoyable that way, to have yourself explore somewhere without strong analysis.
It wasn't long before you found yourself at a staircase, descending towards the beach, and deciding to follow the strong winds thst pushed you forward, you tread on. Taking a step onto the sand you hear it shuffle beneath you, but that wasn't where you attention laid, you could sense him somewhere, you were certain of it. And you began to wander about, feeling the strings of your soul lead you, before you begin to hear a melody play, one you know all too well.
You hum to yourself as you follow it, your steps quickening at your excitement. You spot a large cliff one with a whole at the center below, supplying shelter for whoever may need it, and there you spot the flames of a fire dancing. He's here.
You don't run, rather wanting to enjoy listening to his tune for longer, so you take your time strolling about to where you knew he sat. And when you arrived, you didn't greet him, nor did he turn to look at you, you merely took a seat as he continue to play.
There was a comfort that overcomes you at the sound of his playing, the unique and melting notes that ease your shoulders and cause you to feel just a tad bit sleepy.
But as many things do, it also comes to an end.
He finally faces you, a soft smile resting on his face. "I had a guess you'd be around here." You chuckle, "A guess you say? I think it was more than that." Kazuha didn't answer you, but you were certain he was more than well-aware you had been but a few miles away attempting to navigate your way. Hell, knowing him he probably staked out here knowing you'd be searching for him this day.
"I should've known you would've been at a place like this."
"Oh? And why is that?"
"You know why. You're the kind to go wandering alone, embracing what views you may be offered. You follow the wind, as you would say."
He gave you an airy chuckle as you quote him. "That is true. I find it is best when I listen to my heart. It leaves me feeling... rather light." "Like a feather?" "Like a leaf. A spring leaf."
"Pfft. Don't you think it's far too early to call it Spring? We still are in Winter after all. Winter leaves fit you best."
"Do they now? But, it is true it is only Winter. I mustn't rush the seasons so quickly."
You scooted closer to him feeling the warmth aroma stronger now as you sat closer to the fire. You spoke, "God, you and your deep talking." You rolled your eyes at him and his words. "What, do you not think it is but the perfect time for such words? The year is coming to an end, and all of us are reuniting."
"You do this every day, Kazuha" You point out as you giggle, but he only returns the smile you have. "I'll allow your sappiness, just this once." "Hm, even if it isn't about the beginning of our ends?" You give him a quizzical look, raising a brow. "What else do you have to spit fancy words about?"
The sand shuffles beneath him as he reaches for your hand, you feel the bandages press against your knuckles softly. "Maybe it's directed towards you." You paused for a moment, and then swallowed your shock before mumbling for him to go on.
"There are many reasons I could speak of as to why this day is special for all, but wouldn't I rather endear you with what I find most intriguing?"
You don't respond, but your attention is evidently on him. He nearly chuckles at how well he managed to capture your attention, albeit this being no new sight.
"You truly are divine. I long found that you seem to trail along with you a sense of familiarity. I find that despite having known you for the time I have it feels more as though I have spent many lifetimes with you. I suppose such a case wouldn't be farfetched, after all, fate continues to bring us together, does it not?"
Ever since you first met the wanderer you've been opened up to a different world. You found yourself connecting with your inner self and the world around you differently, in a more out of this world experience almost, as though you are merely wandering from dream to dream, going about a hazy sleepwalk. Though, if that was the case you wished to never awake from this sight.
This silencing beauty, that is almost mind numbing. His crimson eyes that constantly seem rested, as though he had just awoken from a slumber. They engulf you with their warmth, pull you into the spring filled with life as you find he brings meaning to everything even if it lacks reason. It's admirable.
You don't even notice the way your body sways towards him the more he talks, like his voice soothes you till you don't feel the need to even think. You take quite a while to answer with your mind churning at the small details you notice of him. "Yeah. Yeah, it does." He giggles at your simple reply and how despite you answering it seems you aren't even fully with him, too busy admiring the sound of his laughter.
"You mustn't get too caught up in your thoughts." He pulls you closer to him, "Though we might wander to a place high up were all seems even further heavenly, reality finds its own way to attain its own beauty." Kazuha whispers to you, as he leans to your neck, the kisses he plants making your heart race. They felt so gentle yet it was choking you.
"You're far too talkative for your own good."
"You don't seem to mind, though." You don't.
Not so far away you begin to hear fireworks. They were quite far away from you considering you were on the complete opposite side of where the festival was taking place. Yet, you saw as soon fireworks began to specifically begin being targeted in your ray of sight. Searching for where they were coming from you realise it was from where Yoimiya worked, and you turned to peer down at Kazuha who was admiring the fireworks, but you knew he noticed your behaviour.
"I wishes to grant you with a sight that I'd hope would live in your mind for the coming lives."
He lifted his head off you, turning to you and smiling. You couldn't deny how attractive you found him. What wasn't there to like about him.
To think he'd ask such a favour of her. You could imagine her giddiness.
His face was close to yours, but the distance was comfortable nonetheless. Anything was with him.
"Let us continue to live through our souls and shall we bonded just as two different leafs with the same patterns would."
"Let us." You agreed.
You feel the skin of his other hands palm rest on your cheek guiding you to him as he allows your lips to meet and what you feel is indescribable. You rest your hand on top of his, and flutter your eyes shut.
Truly, have you ever been kissed by the angels and felt them guide you gently with their winds as they deepen their touch. As they caress your cheek? It is truly, an experience beyond words, not even he could explain the life he feels rebloom within him.
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sage-nebula · 24 days
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I'm FINALLY all caught up on Horizons! I've been using this website called Blissey's Husband (lol) to watch them, and I have to say I ended up a bit disappointed today when I was met with anti-adblock measures AND episode 49's subs not using the English translations for the cities / pokémon names / moves when every episode prior had subs that did (and the inconsistency there bothers me SO much) . . . but I got around the anti-adblock and I could deal with the subs suddenly dropping their use of the English names for this one episode, so it was whatever. (Though if they're not going to bother with that, then I'll probably just download the new episodes from Some Stuffs from now on, like . . . the only reason I was using Blissey Husband, aside from convenience of streaming, was that it was nice to have the attack names and pokémon names translated. There's no reason to use that site otherwise.)
BUT ANYWAY. Now that I'm finally all caught up through episode 49, here are my general thoughts:
As I mentioned in a previous post, I think the Horizons anime is absolutely fantastic, particularly if we're judging it by the metric of "a Pokémon anime" -- because if we're being honest, there are sliding scales of anime that differ not only by genre, but also by demographic and intention, and so a Pokémon anime is not necessarily intended to hit the same storytelling quality as, say, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood. But with that being said, particularly when you compare it to the previous Pokéani that ran for over two decades, Horizons is just so, so, so good. It has an ongoing narrative, the characters are excellent, the story is compelling, the animation and battles are fresh and exciting, the music is great, so on and so forth. I'm having such a fun time with the Horizons anime. Anyone who refuses to watch it just because Ash and/or the TRio aren't in it are missing out. It truly is their loss.
Speaking of, Captain Pikachu > Ash's Pikachu. Not necessarily in terms of battle capability (although honestly . . .), but in terms of characterization and personality. At least so far, Cap is chock full of personality and is clearly not there just to be The Mascot or Friede's partner (or, worse, a babysitter to other pokémon), but rather a whole, full-fledged character in his own right. And to be honest, sometimes he's kind of a dick! He's cocky! He's arrogant! He argues with Friede when he thinks he's right! He yells at the kids in the beach episode and continues frowning at them even after! (No clue what he was yelling at them about either lmao.) Cap's not a complete hardass, but there is a shade of that there! And I mean, he taught himself to fly using Volt Tackle, so he holds himself to those same exact standards. Again, this is an example of how this series does such an excellent job with its characters. They had to have a Pikachu, but they didn't half-ass the Pikachu character. Cap is a fantastic part of the crew.
That said, sadly there are some neglected members of the cast. The Six Heroes are pretty much immediately forgotten after their captures, which I find to be extremely disappointing and, at times, distracting. Don't they need to eat? To be cared for? Or do the ancient pokéballs take care of that? It's never explained, and it's odd for Liko -- who is so compassionate and cares for others at the expense of herself even -- to just completely ignore them after they agree to search for Rakua with her. (Or is it Lakua? Or Laqua? Do we have official romanization?)
But okay, maybe we can't fit giant pokémon into the regular episodes. Then what about Wattrel? It honestly feels like Roy neglects that poor bird after the first three or so episodes after its capture. Unlike Liko and Dot, whose secondary captures walk around with them constantly, Wattrel is constantly in his ball and basically never comes out -- and when he does come out to be used in battle, he is out for maybe two seconds before he gets knocked out and has to be recalled (or is only there to help Dot with an art project, because Roy didn't want to use both of his pokémon for help with the sculpture that required pokémon help? hello???). Of course, Wattrel is probably weak, because Roy never trains it. Because the writers forget about it 99% of the time. Again, it wouldn't be as noticeable if Hatenna wasn't in Liko's hood 99% of the time and Tinkatink wasn't constantly clambering around Dot's feet, but since they are, it is. Why is Wattrel always in the ball? Why does Roy forget Wattrel exists until Dot asks if she can borrow him? It looks like we're going to get a Wattrel episode in a couple weeks (I think it's episode 52?) and it won't surprise me if it's a release episode because the writers just can't be fussed to remember Wattrel exists otherwise.
Changing tracks -- for the most part I think that the balance has been good with acknowledging the fact that Liko, Roy, and Dot are a.) kids and b.) newbie trainers, and thus need the adults to help them out of dangerous situations, without making it seem as if the kids are helpless and can't do anything. This is particularly well-handled in the fact that the kids have been consistently learning and training, and are now in a Terastal course where they're on a little independent journey to grow even stronger. It's a delicate line to walk between coddling your child characters, and making the adults in your cast look useless. Historically, Pokémon has been a very "adults are useless" series, but with so many prominent adult characters, Horizons can't really do that. So I'm glad that, for the most part, they've managed to avoid going in the opposite direction. The only time I felt they failed was in the episode when Roy's ancient pokéball got stolen, and Cap had to "save" them from the thief. I felt that the kids should have been allowed to win that battle on their own. But otherwise, I feel this series handles this aspect pretty well, and I'm glad that we've been shown an ongoing growth arc for the kids.
Though having said all that, I am scratching my head a bit at the beginning of this most recent arc acting like Liko is the weakest battler of the three: putting her against Katy when the Basics tests were decided on aptitude, having Liko say that "even [she]" could pass her test, et cetera. Not only is Liko thus far the only one of them with an evolved starter pokémon, but Liko has won numerous battles throughout the series so far (I think more than Roy and definitely more than Dot since Dot rarely battles and pretty much all of her knowledge is theoretical) and she's been shown to be a clever strategist. Like that's been the major point of difference between Liko and Roy: Liko is a strategist who can deduce how to use her surroundings to her advantage and knows how to direct her pokémon with precision, whereas Roy goes in guns blazing. It was only by following her example (and by Liko throwing) that Roy managed to beat her in the test set to them by Kabu. So it makes little sense that Liko is implied to have the weakest battling aptitude (and thus is put against the weakest Gym Leader), that she is the one to lose her Basics test battle even if she passed the test, and so on. We're being told now that Liko is weak at battling (something Liko also said when talking to Rika at Naranja Academy), but we've been shown the opposite. If anyone should be considered the weakest battler of the main trio, it should be Dot. (Since, again, most of her knowledge is theoretical; she's actually battled very little.)
As a final thing, I really love the mystery elements of the story. The Explorers are a fascinating antagonist organization and I love every little glimpse that we get of them. The individual Explorer members are excellent as well, with each one having a fantastic design and stand-out characterization. I'm currently operating under the opinion that Lucius and Gibeon were divorced, and Lucius was the one who got Rakua and custody of Terapagos in the settlement.
I've also seen the theory that Amethio is either a descendant or a clone (or a cloned descendant?) of Gibeon. While I don't think that Amethio is Gibeon's son (I think Gibeon is too old for that), I could see either grandson or, I think strangely more likely, clone. Because the way that Terapagos reacted so strongly to Amethio made it seem like he'd seen Amethio before, when there's no way he could have. I thought maybe he was reacting to Explorer insignia, but Amethio wasn't wearing the crest. But if Amethio is a dead ringer for Gibeon (as in, a clone), and Terapagos thought Amethio WAS Gibeon, and Gibeon and Lucius had a messy divorce and Lucius got custody of Terapagos IN the divorce . . . oh yeah. It's all coming together. But of course I don't think Gibeon or Hamber would go around parading the fact that Gibeon cloned himself, so they'd probably just call Amethio his grandson (similar to how Hunter was called Belos' nephew in The Owl House). So that would lead to the other Explorers seeing him as a "pampered prince," when really he's only kept around the way he is because he's Gibeon's clone.
I've also seen theories that Ann is evil, and while I'm not convinced of that, I do agree with the people who pointed out that she and Sango look so much alike. The little fang, the pigtails, the eye shape . . . I don't think that Ann is Sango in disguise (why would Sango need to infiltrate Naranja Academy / the Terastal Course as Sandwich-chan if she was already infiltrated as Ann?), but I could see them potentially being sisters or cousins or something. Similarly, someone else pointed out that Conia and Spinel have the same hair and eye color, so there's a possibility for relation there as well, and with family (found or otherwise) being such a HUGE theme in Horizons . . . oh yeah . . . it's all coming together . . .
ANYWAY. As I said, I am really loving the Horizons anime so far, and I'm glad that I'm caught up. It's really great and I can't wait for the new episode this weekend! For now though, I may go to AO3 to see what I can find over there 👀 I've got some fic ideas I'm toying with myself, but I'm curious what others have cooked up too. I'm sure there's some good ones already.
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mamamittens · 5 months
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Was a bit meh today and decided to draw Nikia in a more dressy post-Thatch meeting fit.
With his foulard thingy wrapped around her waist. Idk how big foulards are meant to be but Thatch has pretty broad shoulders and wears it loose normally so eh, here we are!
Shit, forgot the markings on her wings... Eh, I can just say they disappear when her wings are this small since they're meant to be more 'freckles'???
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More in OP style too, or about as much as I could recreate really. Started to be done with it all by the time it got to shading/highlights so it's a little more meh in that aspect.
This is about what she'd look like with her wings shrunk but nothing else changed, so maybe like dinner with her folks or something where she doesn't want to smack things by accident but doesn't mind filling out her top like she naturally can.
I figure her mom gets a little depressed at the implication her daughter feels the need to hide her natural... "Features" so Nikia avoids it when out with her mom specifically. At least then she's not alone in this specific struggle lol
I also finally decided how Thatch and Nikia first meet, though it's incredibly brief, it's a little fun!
Basically WBP come around because Nikia's dad told them about the island and got a personal escort but Nikia is on "dock duty" so she personally shows up to fill out paperwork. Who they are, what sights they're interested in, and who to contact in an emergency with one of their crew mates. That kind of thing. And then she gets a call about an avalanche and folks trapped in the snow and has to go.
But before she does, she does this little curtsey and wishes them a wonderful stay with a cheery smile before taking off. Thatch missed almost the entire visit but comes up just in time to see her go and jokes to Marco like "Damn, am I so unloved here that no one bothered to tell me we were visited by an angel?"
Imagine his surprise when he goes to Winter Isle to check out the exclusive ingredients grown there and happens on Nikia's lodge? The rest, as they say, is history (or rather, the future since I haven't actually written it yet???)
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akirameta84 · 1 year
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idk when or if ill finish this and ive had a habit of sharing my unfinished wip fics lately so heres the sequel to the werewolf au oneshot i wrote (and that i also shared the first part of months before i finished and posted it to ao3 lol)
id say its a bit under halfway done? idk. it follows directly after the last oneshot and may be confusing without it. and its an unfinished fic so you wont be missing anything if you just wait for it to eventually be finished and published (even if it might be a year rip)
but yeah. this is the first half or so wip of "Howling Harassment" sequel to the kubosai werewolf oneshot "Lycanthropic Liasons"
has not been edited or proofread obviously cause its not even done
its 5.3k words, and warning for vomiting mentions. if you want to skip the mini scene where kusuo is sick (he doesnt puke in the scene but talks about having done so) ive bolded the start and end of it. you wont be missing any plot details with it, but this wip preview does end shortly after it with just a paragraph so if you plan to skip that scene you can just stop reading at the first bolded part and be fine
enjoy i guess
also my italics didnt copy over so :shrug: place them where you think they go
Kusuo had been enjoying a very nice nap, relaxing peacefully and soaking in some warm sunshine, when the feeling of something wet dripping onto him slowly roused him from his slumber.
He blearily opened one eye but then immediately snapped both open when he caught sight of the tan wolf, shockingly with a normal looking chin, leaning over him and drooling all over his face. Recoiling and lurching to his paws in the same beat, he stumbled a good few meters away from Nendou, standing tensely in the grass.
They were right outside the makeshift and, honestly, poorly constructed hideout of Kaidou and Aren’s, and Kusuo had thought that if he took a nap outside he could both enjoy the sun on his fur and separate himself from Nendou, since the idiot would likely be enthralled by Kaidou and Aren attempting to play card games with paws.
Apparently Kusuo had been very very wrong. He sat down hard into the dirt and reached a back leg to scratch painfully at his head, like it would help get all the saliva off of him even though he knew it wouldn’t.
Nendou had been staring at him the whole time until a deep bark from the hideout entrance sounded, calling his attention. Aren’s deep purple and very furry but scarred head stuck out from the door made of blankets and glared at Nendou, having heard Kusuo’s mental distress. Nendou whimpered but strutted over to the entrance and headed inside.
In regards to the werewolf telepathy, since they were unsure if Nendou could hear them, attempting verbal communication without the ability to speak words was necessary to try and talk to the idiot who had also found himself lycanthropic by unknown means. At least they knew where he was now and Kusuo could fix any problems his disappearance has started to cause.
Kusuo was slightly worried as well that, due to the fact that he was missing all of the last week, Nendou couldn’t turn back like Kaidou and Aren had at first. Kusuo had been able to teach them by just instructing them through how he usually activated his shape-shifting, and it had thankfully done the trick.
He was still hoping that Nendou could hear their trains of thought even if they were blocked from his. He’d shown no signs of it, but this was Nendou. He could be hearing everything and not give a single clue.
Either way, it was still absolutely bizarre to have someone (Or up to three someones) reading his mind for a change, even if the fact that he didn’t have to bother with proper communication as much was pleasant.
‘It’s still bizarre to me that you’ve heard all of our thoughts up to now from when you met us, Kusuo.’
Yeah. That was fair. Kusuo lifted his head and gazed at the darkening sky that was many shades of orange and pink as the sun gradually lowered into the horizon. It was rather pretty and almost soothing to stare at. It’d been decently bright and blue when he’d gone to sleep, so he’d gotten a good few hours in.
That was good. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to sleep once he went back home and dealt with what would be waiting for him. There was no way his brother had already gone from England to Japan in under twelve hours, even if their mom calling about limiter issues was fairly serious, but he’d still get harassed via television video call from his brother and either wait in dread for his brother to fly over or just teleport himself and get it over with.
Both sucked.
‘I think you’re over reacting. Surely your brother didn’t literally create something that turns people into werewolves. That sounds impossible. To be fair, so does being born an esper, but still.’
‘…B-but how else did it get…created?’
Kaidou was very bad at hiding his excitement at the concept of a mad scientist making something like lycanthropy, even if he posed his question as.
And also how he wondered if Kusuo’s brother could make him into a vampire instead, because when he watched a movie series called- ‘Hey stop stop sto-’
Kusuo snorted but obliged and cut that train of thought off, standing up and padding over to the hideout entrance.
Regardless, the answer was very much no to Kaidou, there really was no other potential source, and yes to Aren. Kuusuke was most certainly behind this and Kusuo was either going to make him fix it or commit fratricide.
‘…Can you…m-maybe-’
‘If he makes a cure I’m not letting you stay like this, Kaidou.’
Kusuo arrived at the blanket covering and stepped inside right on cue to see Kaidou’s best attempt at a canine frown and puppy eyes…the latter of which was quite a lot more effective in a literal dog form than it normally was for the boy seated on a pillow in the very corner of the hideout, front paws splayed over a bunch of cards on the carpeted ground in front of him.
He looked away before the eyes could take effect. He was getting far too soft and was not about to consider willingly keeping one of his friends a goddamn werewolf when he could reverse it.
When. Not if. Kusuo kept making sure he left no room for doubt in his mind. That way it would be easier to kill Kuusuke if he failed to make a totally guaranteed cure.
Aren was padding back over to the light blue wolf, a sulking Nendou in tow, and though Kusuo’s thoughts had already spelled out for the two of them that he was about to go home and get the confrontation or whatever over with, he still had one more pressing issue to attempt to solve beforehand.
‘Nendou,’ He projected outwards, staring at him as if it would help get his message across, taking a few more steps on the frankly uncomfortably textured carpet.
To his slight shock, the tan wolf spun his head around so quickly he feared Nendou would break his neck (A familiar sight, Nendou did that far too much, even if it had less of an impact without the…mildly disturbing human face), tongue lolling out of his mouth as he watched Kusuo expectantly.
Aren and Kaidou looked up, intrigued, their minds similarly surprised that Nendou could hear their minds just fine.
…Could he? There was a chance that had been Kusuo’s own inherent telepathy as it was hard to tell the two versions apart, unlike the ease at which he could separate the lycanthropic ability and his own shape-shifting.
If it was his own and the idiot couldn’t hear Kaidou or Aren that wasn’t that much of an issue. Kusuo was the one who needed to help him turn back, after all.
(Considering the fact that Nendou didn’t visibly react to any of Kusuo’s ambient thoughts about that, actually, Nendou was not connected to the werewolf telepathy. He can only hear projected thoughts from Kusuo’s. Kaidou seemed utterly fascinated by that, while Aren was just mildly annoyed at how it was so complicated. Kusuo was in agreement with his boyfriend, and not just because of that status).
Nendou’s head tilted after the good few moments of staring, and Kusuo realized he should probably elaborate on why he got his attention before he was licked or pounced on again.
‘Do you want me to show you how to turn back tomorrow?’
He almost offered to do it right now but remembered, bitterly, that they were all stuck like this for a good while longer thanks to the moon cycle.
To his surprise, Nendou responded by shaking his head no, slobber flailing from his tongue as he did so. He heard Kaidou yelp as a drop landing in his eye, according to his thoughts.
That was…not the expected or desired answer at all. Kusuo wished he could just ask why straight up, but he would just go through the options instead.
Aren had sat down facing the two of them, even though Nendou was still turned away from Kusuo and looking back with his head, face far too amused to be anything but smug.
‘I bet he’s going to already know how to-’
‘You’re jumping ahead in the narrative, shut up.’
‘…I’m what?’
Kusuo firmly decided to ignore him. Kaidou could probably use some help putting all the playing cards away, he not so subtly thought of but didn’t directly project as he looked over and saw the small wolf in question pushing around the cards with his paws to try and get them all in a small stack again.
Aren just rolled his eyes but turned away to assist, and Kusuo gave his attention back to the ever still and rapt Nendou.
Seriously, he kind of wished that Nendou had lost interest in their one-sided conversation during the decently sized breaks in it. That would be less creepy.
‘Are you saying no because you already know how?’ He asked next, using purely his own deductive reasoning and nothing else.
‘You are really something special, babe.’
Kusuo shifted in place, annoyed, as Nendou nodded. There was no bothering with asking why the fuck he had stayed like this a week when there wouldn’t be a reply. He just huffed out a breath of air and asked one last question.
‘Will you please turn back and be human again by tomorrow?’
Nendou unflinchingly nodded at the downright angry tone of Kusuo’s, finally spinning around fulling and raising a front paw up, curling it and uncurling it awkwardly.
Was that supposed to be a thumbs up? Probably. He could only guess that it was because the idiot tended to give so many of those normally.
Kusuo nodded to himself and walked away, putting as much space between him and Nendou as he could in the small hideout, ending up next to the other two slightly less idiotic wolves.
‘Slightly!? It’s more than just slightly!’
Aren just chortled.
‘Do you want help getting home before I go, Kaidou? I can teleport you and then make your family perceive you as human if they happen to see you before you’re able to change back. And, of course, make your disappearance today nonexistent.’
There was a worrying hesitation before Kaidou replied, his snout twisting awkwardly as if he were trying to bite at his lip, and he paused in gently nudging a few cards to the side and merging them with the growing stack. Kusuo used his telekinesis to grab them all and order them neatly into a stack, floating them straight into the box.
Kaidou blinked at him, startled but grateful, but refocused his mind quickly.
‘A-actually I want to. Uh…t-tell them. I don’t want to hide it forever and it would just be…easier. To tell them.’
Huh. Kusuo had heard Kaidou’s mind dance on that possibility, but it had been thought about so little that he hadn’t expected the boy to actually decide on that course of action in the end.
‘…I hope it goes well, then. Do you still want help getting home right now or will you wait?’
‘I’ll w-wait with Aren. Get some nerves out. And go home when we’re back.’
‘Very well.’
Kaidou and Aren had taken to keeping spare clothes in the hideout, so that plan would work just fine for them. Kusuo had no need, he could just teleport freely around those two since his secret wasn’t secret between them. And, in all honesty…it felt nice to have have a friend closer than Aiura or Toritsuka know, as well as someone even closer but not family.
But for now he also was definitely not telling any other friends. Not until he was ready to actually do it on his own terms for once.
Kusuo turned around and walked towards the exit of the hideout despite not needing to in order to head home, but it somehow felt more polite to leave this way and then teleport.
‘I’ll see you guys tomorrow, then.’
Kaidou and Aren seemed baffled that he’d said farewell which was rather fair since he never gave those or said hello much at all, but responded in kind themselves.
Before he could make it all the way out, though, footsteps sprinted towards him, and he didn’t have much time to react before Aren shoved his face against Kusuo’s, rubbing them together like he was a cat instead of a wolf.
Aren’s expression was far too innocent afterwards as he drew back and somehow grinned, and Kusuo rolled his eyes and turned away, keeping his body but most importantly his stupid tail with a mind of its own still as warmth bloomed in his chest, grateful his face couldn’t flush like this.
He continued walking moments after, only not doing something to be polite and reciprocate because he needed to leave and not because the prospect of doing so like this was embarrassing.
He briefly wanted to strangle Aren when he heard his mental chuckle at his denial.
As soon as he had fully crossed through the blanketed doorway, tail and all, Kusuo gathered his energy and teleported to his bedroom, a location so familiar he didn’t even need to conjure the image in his head to travel to it.
And, as soon as all four of his legs landed on his bedroom floor, his television turned on and his brother’s ugly face filled the screen, telepathy canceler adorning his long blonde hair, some of it covering his left eye and the rest of it in a ponytail, despite Kusuo being nowhere close enough to read his mind. He bared his teeth at the image and intentionally raised his hackles.
It took less than a second of being home for his brother to make an entrance.
Fifty six milliseconds, to be precise.
Kuusuke sniffled, feigning sadness as his tinny voice sounded through the speakers, “I can’t believe my own baby brother is so angry at me paying him a pseudo visit. How upsetting, after mom called me so worried about you and everything…”
Kusuo just sat on his floor and glared at the television, making eye contact not with Kuusuke’s image, but with the camera perched very visibly on top of the television.
His brother knew he’d be slaughtered if he had cameras permanently installed in Kusuo’s or their parent’s bedrooms. But he’d been barely spared when he added one to his TV that only activated when he was video calling, and the living and dining rooms got actual full-time cameras.
“Hmph, no response? Not even a rude comment?” His brother paused purposefully and smugly, “Oh, wait, you can’t respond! Without your telepathy, since even with my lovely canceler I’m still far out of range, you can’t speak like that.”
A teasing glint entered his brother’s visible eye as Kusuo continued to glare, unimpressed, “Or can you? Come on, can you speak, Kusuo? Speak? Like a good dog?”
He had to put physical effort into swallowing his growl, because that would have almost given Kuusuke exactly what he wanted. His bedroom sat in silence as they had an impromptu, or really, with his brother, expected competition to see who’s resolve gave first.
Kuusuke didn’t bother to try very hard, giving up with a shrug quickly because as much as he liked to make fun of his brother and attempt to win at every little thing, proper competition or not, they shared the same trait of impatience.
Kusuo’s patience was better overall, though. It had to be, growing up with his powers and all.
“I will say, it is a lot harder to decipher what you want to say like this. I’ve mastered your blank human expression, obviously, but I am very much not a canine person. Maybe I should have made werecats instead…”
Kusuo didn’t even bother to hide his growl that time, narrowing his eyes and translating his words clearly enough that his brother was easily able to garner the meaning when given more information than an empty glare.
“Oh? Am I responsible for you and your friend’s predicament? Obviously. To be completely truthful, though, you were never supposed to find out, and you were especially not supposed get infected yourself.”
Kusuo tilted his head to the side, keeping his eyes narrowed to hopefully keep his skepticism clear.
His brother laughed at first, “Aw, you look adorable like that. It barely looks like you’re angry,” Kusuo snapped his head back up instantly, “But no, I am not lying. That’s why I kidnapped and gave the virus to your brainless friend initially, so you wouldn’t hear any thoughts about it.”
Kuusuke paused to wave a hand dismissively at the question Kusuo didn’t even try to ask, anticipating the obvious.
“I never left London and your friend never left Japan, either. I had robots kidnap and inject him with the serum I had mailed to a private lab I own in the area beforehand. It was easier and I had no risk of getting infected myself. What I failed to realize is that your little pet idiot could break out of a room made of solid steel walls and take off the tracking collar in the process.”
The screen briefly flickered to an image of, presumably, the room Nendou had been held in. There was a large hole in one of the gray, metal walls, opening straight into the outside, and the image barely lasted a few seconds before his brother was back in view.
Ah. Kusuo didn’t think that was possible either, but this was Nendou they were talking about, who has done countless other inhuman feats like his stunt in the school marathon. If Kusuo didn’t know any better, he’d say that Nendou also had psychic abilities.
“Anyways, I’m sure you’re wanting my help with this…issue of yours?” Kuusuke questioned, not leaving room for Kusuo to respond before continuing.
Not that Kusuo would have replied anyways, but the implications were still rude.
“Why don’t you teleport over here right away and let me have a look? I have to admit, much to my shame… I have no way of making a cure without seeing the biological structure of the transformed state first. Otherwise I might be reverting things that are actually a part of your human body.”
That was the biggest pile of bullshit Kusuo had ever heard, and his eye roll only conveyed a tiny fraction of how pissed he was.
“Ah, you’re too smart for that, huh, Kusuo? Yeah, I actually don’t know if I can revert the lycanthropy at all, haha! I never planned to in the first place.”
…Sometimes, the truth hurt significantly more than the lie he had tried to get fed. Kusuo sighed, quite displeased, and stood with a stretch, walking right past his television and heading for the door of his bedroom, which he swung open telekinetically.
He couldn’t see his brother anymore, but he could, unfortunately, still hear him, “Cold shoulder, huh? I never said I wouldn’t try, Kusuo,” He paused mid-step, body halfway out of the door, “Teleport over tomorrow before school, since I really don’t think you’ll get anywhere near me transformed and you’re stuck like this until around six in the morning tomorrow, and I’ll see what I can think of. I won’t keep you anymore, mom’s about to call you down for dinner. Goodbye!”
Kusuo heard his television forcefully shut off with a faint click at the same time his mom’s thoughts grew in volume as they targeted him with ‘Ku-chan, dinner’s ready!’
He’d known dinner was ready. That was why he’d teleported home at this time and had started leaving the conversation when he had. Hmph. Maybe it was a little bit of intentional cold shoulder, sure, but it was mostly dinner.
Or at least that was what he’d tell his mom if Kuusuke whined to her about Kusuo being mean, because he was just being mean for the fun of it. It wasn’t like his brother didn’t deserve it. Sure, he said he was going to genuinely try and fix the whole stupid werewolf thing, but it was his fault in the first place so the effort overall amounted to nothing.
…Did Kuusuke say six in the morning? That probably meant the initial shift had been at six this morning, which added up. That was utterly ridiculous. It was from sunrise to sunrise on the day and night with the fullest moon. How irritating. Kusuo was very good at tuning out Kaidou and Aren’s train of dialogue at this point, helped by his seventeen years of experience tuning out telepathy in general, so much so that he could even forget about them, but their exclamations of horror at that time-frame brought them back into the forefront for a moment.
They’re going to be waiting in that hideout much longer than anticipated… Kusuo sent them a brief condolence. He sent himself a reminder to set an alarm for tomorrow morning so he could shift back promptly.
Abruptly done, Kusuo turned back into his room instead of stepping all the way out, finding and grabbing his dinner telekinetically and bringing it straight to himself, ignoring the silverware for obvious reasons. Upon seeing his plate float away from his table, his mom’s thoughts became rather worried, but he reassured her that he was fine, just still. Having issues.
“…And I’ll be going to see Kuusuke early tomorrow,” He tacked on as well, rolling his eyes at how that statement fully calmed her down in the end.
Setting the plate down on his desk, Kusuo did his best to hop onto his desk chair, grumbling as he landed and the chair teetered precariously before balancing. Doing that was much easier as a cat, considering he weighed around ten pounds as one compared to now in which he was probably a good bit over a hundred.
Mildly annoyed, he huffed again tonight, and started eating (And being a bit disheartened at how dull the normally delicious tonkatsu tasted. He didn’t have anywhere near as many taste buds as a human did, so it was like the flavor was distant and sad), debating on if even trying to sleep when he felt wild awake and irritated was even worth it.
Well, even just lying restfully in his bed would be nice, and Kusuo decided listlessly relaxing was how he’d spend the rest of the night. School tomorrow would probably be a pain after having to deal with his brother, and a mental break would be necessary.
If only he had his germanium ring to truly relax in silence, properly removing both forms of telepathy. As much as he was fond of his nuisances, it was socially draining to always be either in a conversation or hearing one, as the werewolf telepathy was louder than his.
‘Are you telling us to shut up?’
‘Of course not. I’m complaining to myself, not you.’
‘…Right.’
Back on track, even if he could wear a ring on paws, it was no longer functional. The initial transformation had taken his ring with it, just like his clothes, and it’d been warped and broken beyond repair due to Kusuo’s innate strength. If it hadn’t, he likely would’ve tied it to a string and placed it on his neck.
As it stood, it was one wrong tap from Kusuo away from shattering, which wasn’t good when one weak tap from Kusuo could kill a person.
At least in the fading hours of daylight as dusk transitioned to night, people were settling down; and while most people weren’t going to sleep, they were going from a busy day to a mellow night routine, and their minds quieted as a result.
Finishing his meal and barely stopping himself from zoning out and letting his brain decide to lick the rest of the plate clean, he squinted at the empty dish and activated his clairvoyance to see if he had any coffee jelly of equal value in the fridge.
Fantastically, he did. Thank god his parents didn’t splurge on fancy dishes and silverware. This cheap ceramic plate had the same value of a slightly high in value convenience store coffee jelly, and so he apported the two of them, not caring at all that his empty plate was now in the refrigerator.
Kusuo could put it up later, before his parents noticed. Probably.
The lack of hands was making Kusuo actually appreciative of the full scale of his ESP for once, as ripping the seal off of the cup of jelly was as simple as a flex of his mind.
His tail thumped against the side of chair from where it dangled downwards as he shoved his snout straight into the cup. The taste may be watered down and nowhere close to how divine it was normally, but there was still enough of it present for him to enjoy it blissfully.
When he finished it and licked the entire inside completely clean he apported the empty cup for a significantly cheaper but still good brand of coffee jelly, since eating the contents regrettably lowered the value.
He deserved two for this whole ordeal. Maybe three…
…Perhaps not three, actually, since it wouldn’t do if he ate too much coffee jelly while being unable to truly enjoy its delectable flavor…yeah, two would suffice. That reason was why he had avoided his favorite treat even when dealing with being miserable and shape-shifted against his will, but a whole day stuck as a dog warranted it.
----
Kusuo should not have eaten any coffee jelly.
His head and stomach burned fiercely but, at the very least, he heard little to no mental voices due to it being the middle of the night. Even Kaidou and Aren were fast asleep, evidently, since there was no trace of them in his mind. So he did get the reprieve of his headache was significantly less than it could have been in this moment.
His mom rubbed his back (Basically petting him but the comfort was something he would have gotten the exact same way in a human form, so whatever), kneeling down on the floor to be next to him as he sat on the same, chilly, bathroom tile, right in front of the toilet.
Caffeine was toxic to canines, as well as most other animals. Technically it was still toxic to humans but that was irrelevant due to humans having the constitution for it.
Wolves did not have the constitution for it. It made them very ill instead.
Yes, he’d known that, but he’s eaten coffee jelly in his cat form with no repercussions despite his biology being just as altered as it was now…but, on retrospect, he wasn’t sure if he’d ever spent the next few hours after those moments remaining in a cat form and letting that body start to digest it, instead turning back before that could happen.
His mom’s mind was frantic with distress which was fair considering she’d found her normally invulnerable son still transformed and heaving the contents of his stomach into the toilet in the middle of the night after waking up from the noise of him teleporting and landing loudly into the bathtub at first because he’d been disoriented and nauseous, but she’d refused to let her mind come up with and ask questions until she was sure Kusuo was going to be alright.
She was a godsend, and so he decided to explain of his own free will so she wouldn’t start crying, which she was far too close to for comfort, flicking his gaze to the side so that it met hers.
“I’m okay. Or getting there. Dogs can’t have coffee or they get sick. I ate two cups of coffee jelly after dinner…I think I forgot to take the plate I apported into the fridge back out as well. Sorry.”
“Kusuo…” The use of his actual name was usually a bad sign, but now it was more out of exasperation and worry than anything of the scolding variety, “Can you still not turn back?”
He just shook his head, not wanting to explain that he wouldn’t be able to until a time frame that was far too specific for what he was still pretending was a power malfunction.
Kurumi just hummed sadly at that, continuing to stroke his back even as his scooted a bit away from the toilet. His stomach was still rolling queasily, but Kusuo was fairly sure that his body was done being absolutely disgusting.
He almost shuddered remembering how it had felt. He was beyond glad his ESP made him neigh immune to disease, because vomiting was the most unpleasant thing he’d ever experienced so far in life.
As he continued to pull himself back together, staring blearily at the white bathroom floor tiles, his mom asked him another question, “Would medicine help?”
“Even if it did, given my powers, I can’t take it like this. Human medication is a very big no-no for animals,” He sighed mentally and slowly raised himself off the ground, taking shaky steps past his mom and towards the open bathroom door. It was dark in the house, and so the hallway outside looked pitch in contrast to the illuminated bathroom, even with his ability to see in the dark.
The bathroom was, fortunately, rather close to his bedroom, so he decided against teleporting and padded slowly back to his room, pausing as his mom rushed ahead to open the door for him, leaving the bathroom light on in the process.
That was sweet of her, even if he probably could have used his telekinesis fine. He sent a quiet thanks to her and closed the gap to his bed agonizingly slowly, as his stomach lurched ominously whenever he tried to speed up more than a tiny bit.
Kusuo had actually managed to drift asleep briefly before this incident, lulled sufficiently by soft mental voices as he laid on his bed, and now he was even sleepier feeling. It seemed like getting sick had actually assisted in granting him some much needed rest.
He didn’t bother to shut his bedroom door, nosing under the covers of his bed until he was completely buried and comfortable, wondering faintly where his mom had gone when he heard her footsteps go downstairs, but overall not that concerned about it.
It was only when he had nearly fallen asleep again that his heightened hearing noticed her approaching his bed, and she called for him as she approached the lump of covers he’d become, “Ku-chan?”
He stuck his head out from under his blankets, the rest of his body curled up tightly behind him, looking curiously at his mom as she held a bowl full of water out at him, setting it down on his end table once she’d confirmed that he knew of its presence.
“If you feel up to it, you should make sure to drink some water, okay? Otherwise you’ll get dehydrated, since you just threw up,” She reached a hand down and stroked his head gently, and Kusuo nodded both to signify that he heard her and to dislodge it politely.
He knew that. He just hadn’t felt like getting himself water when he would have survived the night regardless. But, now that it had been brought to him, he crawled up on his bed until he could stick his muzzle into the bowl and drink as his mom turned to leave, wishing him a good rest of the night that he almost forgot to return.
Drinking from a bowl like this was mildly demeaning, but it was significantly less of a hassle than using telekinesis to drink from a cup was. So, since he was feeling very icky and wanted to exert as little energy as possible right now, he decided he didn’t care, tucking his head right back under his blanket once he’d had enough to satiate his thirst.
----
Waking up to an alarm at six in the morning when he didn’t have to be at school until closer to nine would usually be a miserable experience, but for once, Kusuo was downright filled with joy when he remembered why he was startled out of a deep sleep so early.
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Not sure if you write for females but can I get an lumine with like hurt/comfort where she spends too much time with her brother and eventually forgets about you and realizes when her friends tell her? Thank you if you do this! ❤️🥰
Hi!! It’s been forever but since its summer and I’m on a train I figured I’d go through my ask box on this blog. I hope this still finds you!!!
And yes I do write female characters, I’m just usually fixated on men for both the gender and the attraction lol. Usually I don’t do inserts so it’s a bit short but anything for you anon!
It’s not that you didn’t understand why Lumine was so busy. After all, even before she had been reunited with Aether she’d been busy. You had learned to expect long stretches where all you had were letters describing her latest quest, freeing a nation, saving hundreds of lives, or discovering some long lost secret.
Many times, several of those at once.
You had your own life as well, and with your own responsibilities along with a respect for her life it had never really bothered you too much before. It was just how Lumine was.
It’s just now she was staying here right by your home with her brother and you were supposed to have more time together.
You missed the early mornings checking ar the Adventures Guild together and helping her with whatever errand or quest assigned. You missed the long afternoons spent eating lazy lunches in the shade and quiet hours fishing together.
An ugly resentment had grown inside you instead, since she’d been far too busy doing all of that with Aether instead. You knew it wasn’t entirely fair. Aether had been perfectly nice the few times you’d spoken to him. But you just wished Lumine could visit for a bit or at least invite you along with them sometime. You felt left behind. Forgotten about.
You missed her, and it was terribly lonely. Your eyes were watering and you let them. You were at a lunch spot under a tree the two of you often stopped at but it wasn’t the same alone. Your own efforts to cheer yourself up backfired and you felt even worse. You just wanted your friend back.
Suddenly you heard the fair sound of two familiar voices laughing in the distance. You wiped your face quickly, horrified.
What timing.
It was Lumine and Aether, of course. As they rounded the corner towards your spot in the shade, you got to see Lumines carefree expression morph into surprise.
“Oh! I didn’t think I’d run into you here today,” Lumine said breaking into a bright smile. It faltered slightly when she focused on your face, easily reading your expression and red and puffy eyes.
She turned to Aether. “Give me a minute with them,” she said quietly to him, and he nodded, staying a respectful distance behind as she approached you.
“Hey, are you okay?” Lumine kneeled beside you, with a comforting hand resting on your shoulder.
“I’m okay,” you try and reassure her, but she could always read you too well.
“Come on, don’t give me that. What’s wrong?” Her tone was stern, but not unkind.
Your throat felt dangerously tight. You swallowed and let out a shaky breath. “It’s stupid-”
“It’s not,” she interrupted with an air of finality.
“I just miss you,” you admitted.
She tilted her head, studying you. “I’m right here, she points out.
You shrugged. “Yeah it’s just… we’ve hardly seen each other since you’ve been back you know. With Aether.” And once you’ve started it felt impossible to stop. “You said you’d cook those recipes for us when you got back but you’ve been busy…” you wipe the tears spilling over your cheeks, sniffling. “It’s like you’ve forgotten about me,” you finished, voice small.”
Lumine immediately pulled you into a hug, holding you for several long moments. She only lets go once you’ve stopped crying. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I guess I’ve gotten pretty distracted with my brother back- it’s no excuse though.”
“It’s fine,” you murmured.
“Honestly,” she sighs, “Not really.” She sits down beside you, leaning against the rough bark of the tree. She takes her time, collecting her thoughts. “I supposed I just… before, you know, the two of us, my brother and I, we were inseparable. I didn’t need anyone except him. After all that’s happened… part of me just wants to pretend we can just go back to being like that.”
You leaned against her at the admission, trying to provide your own comfort now. “Lumine-”
She shook her head. “No, like I said, it’s no excuse. It isn’t like that anymore. I know that. Besides, I’ve missed you too.” She smiled softly at you and you return the gesture.
“How about this,” she said, “do you want to join me and Aether picking mint? Then afterwards we can have dinner. Just the two of us.”
Your smile brightened at that. “Only if you’re cooking,” you agreed, and Lumine laughed loudly.
“Anything for you.” She got up, and offered you a hand.
You took it.
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wintercosmicskye · 1 year
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Finally made some more digital art! I drew another Halkenna piece! Kinda did a mashup of several of his previous designs with a few other details, I think I like it ^v^ And the reflection is based on the image for A Letter to a Dying Star on Ultranimboy!
I forgot his ear thing in the reflection cuz I originally wasn’t going show it separate and I knew that part was gonna be covered anyways, but then I forgot that part was gonna be covered just long enough to shade the hair and then I wound up wanting to show the reflection part separate. I COULD theoretically Go Back and draw it in, but the file size is so big now that sometimes doing so much as adding a new layer boots me out of editing TvT It honestly doesn’t bother me too much, but I figured I might as well explain in case anyone found the missing ear thing odd lol
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talkingharrystyles · 1 year
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I hope you guys don't get upset by my opinion because I know this is a support place for Florence, I support her too but I'm going to express my pov after Chris's interview. Harry and Chris are coming out of the fake "spitgate" in the best way in the media while Olivia and Florence can't close the chapter in a positive way (I don't care about O reputation) and I know Florence is already working in other bigger and better projects but now it seems that it was only F&O that created drama on set. I think Flo should say something I know she turned the page and she doesn't want to talk about the DWD drama but her silence and how she behaved in Venice is leaving the door open for speculation; I think she should say something maybe not give details that could create more rumors but say something generic that leaves Olivia alone as the drama queen because after Chris's interview with Esquire the narrative is the whole set was peaceful no one saw drama then Why didn't Florence promote the movie if everything was fine on set? I don't know but Florence's version here has to be known sooner or later. I always supported Florence, DWD unfortunately was a missed opportunity to enjoy Harry's work and interaction with one of the best actresses of the moment although I confess that I did not agree with Flo's behavior in Venice that was the only thing I did not like form her and the condescending way in which she spoke of Harry in her Marie Clare interview she was a bit ott. I think WB accepted that she did not promote the film that was a way to respect and understand her decision, but her staylist Miss Flo t-shirts, her body language on the red carpet and leaving in the middle of the standing ovation was unnecessary and rude 😌(i'm sounding like a shipper i'm not proud of that lol), it was like throwing more gasoline on the fire and the Venice Film festival was her only promotional commitment with the movie imo there was no need for so much shade that day, this just my opinion and I hope you don't take it the wrong way, I have nothing against Flo I actually can understand her frustration with H&O because she had expectations with that film for her career and it ended up in a pathetic media circus, but why not say it? I don't think it's fair that the perception remains that she created drama with Olivia when we all know that it was Olivia's self promo decisions that caused Flo to distance herself from the project why not say it? The industry journalist supports her, the film fans support her even Twitter trolls support her, I don't know but I think Florence should close the chapter and not leave her name attached to Olivia as set troublemakers when Florence has never had a bad reputation on set. I want the entire cast to be away from the DWD mess but Florence must speak and express what bothered her nothing bad is going to happen to her career, why so much silence? .
I get exactly what you mean! With the door still being open Olivia will attach to that drama because that’s what she does
But with Flo, I think her interview she did with Variety and saying she won’t comment on dwd was quiet loud (but that’s me!!)
whatever happened with flo and Olivia was probably behind closed doors and like you said her frustration with holivia stunt; flo is the type of person to let her work speak not make a stunt to promote it!
I think maybe flo is pissed with how everything in promo went? And didn’t want anything to do with it- personally with Venice I think the way flo acted was probably to piss Olivia off and ruin the film! A film festival is big deal and let’s be honest I think they all want to forget that night! I mean flo turned up with a cocktail during the press conference when though she said she would be there in the night!
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blood-bound · 1 year
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maple leaf and sunflower for mark aaaand evergreen and seedling for pory!
ITS THE WEEKEND SO ITS TIME FOR ME TO BE (SO NOT) NORMAL ABOUT MY OCS!!! omg did yall miss me on the dash <3 <3 <3
lets
fucking
go
🍁 [MAPLE LEAF] What is your OC's favourite season? Why and what do they do during it?
Okay look like his Vibes are definitely Fall like late Fall, things dying being cold melancholy etc. but his actual FAVORITE season is Spring <3 he lives in Michigan so it stays cold as fuck for a long time and he likes to see things like. grow and come alive. also as a professor the Spring semester is usually easier than the Fall so he likes that he usually teaches less classes so he can spend more time with individual students and his research. He *used* to like the days getting longer too... yea i picked this season to be his fav because of the Tragedy of it all and What Of It?
But really though he is a softie inside and this shows it <3 lol but i think its partially cause all other seasons have something about them that bothers him - summer is too hot so he cant wear sweaters that he likes also rushed classes, Fall is just a Lot for the academic year and also days getting shorter, and winter in Detroit is well. Real cold and miserable.
Also especially after being turned winter would have really bad associations for him lol
🌻 [SUNFLOWER] Where would your OC get lost in the moment/beauty of the place?
well if he ever went to Rome he would spend a lot of time Looking. Like he is really glad airport security isnt that tight cause he thinks one day he could afford to go to Rome now! Its the year 2000 in the US, Ooo he has Plany of Time. Mark might never get to rome UGH so sad.
But other than gay shit like getting lost in his lovers eyes (i crossed it out but its true) Mark isn't so much the type for this sort of thing... hmm... oh he'd definitely do the angsty vampire thing of staring down at city lights from a high place. Looking at all the people walking around... he'd think about how things were x years ago... be like wow people built all this... all the things other kindred don't care about <3 love u mark
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🌲 [EVERGREEN] What does your OC's dream treehouse look like? What tree is it built upon?
Oh this is a cute question. I imagine a birch tree that looks like, way too skinny to handle the treehouse but somehow it does? Most of the treehouse isn't roofed but it is excellently shaded by leaves. A bird nest is within viewing distance. It would have flowerpots and wind chimes oh yes, so many windchimes. Lots of random pretty things hanging from branches in grabbing distance. A secret spot for snacks. A swing... yellow rugs on top of the wood... it'd be so fucking cute omg.
Also enchanted as all hell LOL
🌱 [SEEDLING] What new passions/hates is your OC discovering?
The Cabal Hates Vampires! All bad experiences. Alakazam was captured by em so because he has a personal hatred, so does the cabal lol. They don't see them as human at all and its truly no mercy askdlfjlsdfk.
She hates it when mages don't consider it their responsibility to help humanity. i mean like. they can do so much, they should help as much as they can.
As for new passions, well her obsession is understanding people's 'natural' luck before its influenced by herself and other supernaturals - what determines it, how far back is it determined, etc.
She is also super curious about what other supernatural entities exist cause theyve already met - in order:
changelings a demon vampires tzmizse monster/ghoul creations (i Forgor the name of these) a werewolf
and of course other mages. so tbh not sure what she's missing but im sure our st will come up with something because she is SO CURIOUS
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n0-eyedtaissa · 2 years
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find the word / gimme the word tag:
tagged by @waterloou, who may just get me out of my writer’s slump.
changing the rules (bc of aforementioned slump lol), and will be trying to write a sentence/blurb that contains the given words !
given words: tug, erase, feel, erode, personal, love
tagging:  @kiara-carrera (bc i mentioned her oc, max aka the loml), @veetlegeuse @humangrumpycat @thecaptainsgingersnap
if you want to find / gimme the word, here are yours: flat, trust, mirror, lighter, kitchen, music 
:-) 
The hot breath breeze blows in through the window, making Phoebe wake up disgruntled at the feeling of her long hair stuck to her sweaty neck. She tries to fall back to sleep but it’s of no use; one of the roosters in the neighbor’s yard was cawing angrily, telling Phoebe and the rest of the world that if it had to be awake this early so did everybody else. 
Phoebe sits up in bed too fast, the blood rushing to her head as another painful form of payback from the night before. She tugs her still-tangled hair into a ponytail in hopes that it’ll cool her off and makes her way to the bathroom. Between the heat, the leftover makeup, and the sheen of the still-developing hangover, Phoebe feels like she’s swimming in herself. She ducks her head under the faucet and drinks from the tap to cure her sandpaper mouth. Phoebe wipes at the leftover glitter and mascara smudged under her eyes. There’s a part of her that likes the look of it better than the night before when things were more pristine. 
The walk down stairs is slow and methodical, with Phoebe supporting herself on the wall so she can avoid the squeaky floorboards without stumbling. Her cell phone is tucked in the waistband of her shorts and Phoebe is scared to recharge it. She leans over the kitchen counter, relishing in the feeling of her hot skin against the cold countertops. Her phone buzzes to life and Phoebe can’t tell if it’s regret pooling in the pit of her stomach or if the 4loko she drank last night was about to make a second appearance. 
(2 missed calls) : unknown number 
(unknown number): Did you mean what you said last night?
Phoebe doesn't need to have the number saved in her phone to know who it is. She erases the notifications, tries to clear Rafe away from her mind. Her best friend Max snores softly from her spot on the shabby green couch and Phoebe feels like she’s throwing away some sort of damning evidence. 
“I feel like shit” Max mumbles as she wakes up somewhat, yawning and grabbing what was left of the joint from last night that was sitting in the ashtray. She sparks it up and hands it to Phoebe and the two girls partake in the quiet ritual. 
Phoebe laughed. “Yeah, tell me about it” 
 The Pogues might have been younger than Phoebe but they could hold their alcohol. Somehow John B goaded her into attempting a keg stand and soon after that, JJ bet Phoebe $5 that he could beat her in a shot-gun chugging contest. “My mom always said to never bet money on a Maybank” Phoebe had replied, though no one could stomach asking for more details about what led to that statement. 
“I wanna go swimming” Phoebe states. She’s desperate to wash this feeling off of her, she can feel it clinging to her like a second skin. 
“Then go swimming” Max replies redundantly from the couch, puffing away on the last of the weed with her eyes closed. Max wasn’t shaping up to be much of a morning person, but Phoebe wouldn’t put that past her. 
“I wanted you to go with me”  Phoebe tries to add some sweetness to her voice but Max either fell back to sleep or chose to ignore the request.
Shoving some odds and ends into her tote bag, Phoebe bounds out of the house without bothering to lock the front door. It’s a short walk to the water, Phoebe knows it so well she can do it with her eyes closed (something she was trying to do from under the shade of her big-framed sunglasses). There’s a spot she likes to frequent, there’s a rock just high enough so Phoebe could dangle her feet in the water while she sat. The rock is smoothed from where it had eroded with time and age, covered with a handful of crossed-off declarations of love that were once sharpie-d onto the stone. 
P.D. + M.Z.= B.F.F.’s  , the newest addition. 
There’s a blotch of red spray paint but you can see the ghost of where P.D. + R.C. was once written underneath, at a time far enough away that it meant something. 
Phoebe’s dunking her toes in the water when her phone starts ringing. 
“Hello?” She answers, confused but pleasantly surprised. 
“Yo, Deluca!” Gabriel Whitmer says loudly on the other end, making Phoebe pull the phone away from her ear a little bit. “I woke up to like 3 missed calls from you this morning, what did you get up to last night?” 
“Good morning to you too, Whit...” Phoebe doesn’t feel embarrassed at the prospect of drunk-dialing Whit, though she does feel bad about drunk-dialing someone else.
“You’re evading my question, Deluca, what were you dyin’ to tell me?” 
“I don’t even know at this point, I guess I was just feeling particularly chatty” She smiles, laying back into the grass and draping her arm over her eyes to block out the sun.
“Wow, was someone drunk and trying to get personal?” Whit laughs on the other line and Phoebe can her him smacking his chewing gum. 
Phoebe laughs. She doesn’t really know how she feels about the prospect of getting personal with Whit but she also knows there’s nothing to lose. She knows that this wouldn’t be another situation like what happened with Rafe. 
“I guess we’ll never know” She offers, trying to be coy. 
“What was on your mind last night, Deluca? Life, death, love?” Whit listed off the possibilities, topics he could go on long-winded missives about. The off-base questions he thought were the most telling about the people he met. 
“I guess we’ll never know” She repeats again. 
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surveysand · 11 months
Text
forty-two.
1) If you had to make a six hour cross-country journey, would you rather take the train, fly or drive? How come? fly. it's the fastest and safest option.
2) How long do your earphones tend to last before the connection goes and you have to replace them? quite a few hours. airpods have a decent battery life.
3) If you could dye your hair any colour in the world, assuming it would look perfect with your colouring, what would you pick and why? in reality, i would never die my hair, but if i absolutely had to, i'd do it a super light shade of brown because it's different enough but still closest to my current hair color.
4) Are you a fan of musicals? If you are, what ones have you seen live and which ones would you like to see? i like them, but not too much into them to know what i would want to see next. i've seen aladdin and hamilton.
5) If money was no object, and you could go on a two-week vacation with one other person, who would you take, where would you go and what would you get upto? i would take my partner and we'd go to iceland. one of my dreams is to see the northern lights and both my partner and i have talked about how iceland is one of our dream travel destinations. i would love to see the nature there.
6) Are you someone who needs to have time alone? yes.
7) What’s your opinion on couples who do literally everything together? Are you like that, or is that like one of your worst nightmares? as much as i love spending time with my partner, i definitely need time alone to decompress. i don't have an issue if other couples do it, but both him and i could not do everything in life together, 100% of the time, though we'd prefer it in most instances.
8) Have you ever had to give up something you were addicted to? Did you actually succeed? no.
9) Does your favourite food vary depending on your mood or on the time of year or anything? not really.
10) Do you know anyone whose views/opinions are the complete opposite of yours? Do you find it hard to get on with them as a result, or can you generally ignore it and find something else to talk about? yes, there are many people who really do believe in the antithesis of absolutely everything i do. because i hold my beliefs so closely to me and how much i believe that your views are a direct reflection of your beliefs about others, it's incredibly hard for me to get along well with people like that. i can be cordial, but my image of them will always be tainted by their opinions.
11) Have you ever had to work (or study) with someone that you really didn’t get along with? How did you deal with it (ignoring them, being nice, etc.)? yes, i think that's a part of existing as a human, lol. you do what you do and, if any serious problems arise, you work out the differences or bring in a mediator of sorts.
12) Have you ever had any problems with your wisdom teeth, or have they been taken out already? they came in a few months ago and it was some of the worst pain i've ever been in. thankfully, i don't think i need them taken out as they don't bother me anymore.
13) Which one of your senses would you miss the most if you lost it? sight.
14) Do you ever listen to CDs anymore? i collect them, but don't listen to them.
15) What’s your favourite type of fast food? Is it something you eat a lot or do you try and limit it? chicken nuggets. i eat it when i'm in the position to, i don't necessarily limit it.
16) Do you find your mood changes when you’re hungry or tired? Does eating or sleeping automatically cure your of a bad mood? yes, i become very irritable when i'm hungry or tired. eating will fix my mood immediately, but sleeping when i'm tired doesn't always make me feel better.
17) When you see cute animals, do you just wanna pick them up and cuddle them or fuss them? cuddle them.
18) What’s the stupidest fight you’ve ever gotten into? Did you make up with that person or did you end up losing them over it? when i got into a fight with one of my best friends in eighth grade over some stupid middle school drama. we made up, though, and she's still one of my best friends to this day.
19) Do you find yourself using people as footrests and pillows if you’re sat next to them? no.
20) Have you ever gotten really bad travel sickness? Has this put you off travelling or going by certain modes of transport in case it happens again? no.
21) What’s your opinion on prostitution? Should it be legal and regulated, or is it something that needs to be gotten rid of completely? sex work is work. i absolutely think it should be legal and regulated because there is no way it will ever be eradicated. because of that, as many regulations as possible need to be implemented in order to keep workers safe and have places they can report crimes against them without fear they will be criminalized as well.
22) If it was a case of prostitution or being evicted from your home, which option would you pick (assuming you’d tried everything else to make money first)? get evicted. my parents would allow me to move back home if needed and other family members would take me in as well.
23) What would go into your ideal sandwich? Do you eat that often or is a treat for you? turkey, provolone, mayo, lettuce, and onion on wheat. when i have the ingredients, it's an everyday meal for me.
24) In general do you prefer modern art or more traditional art? Or do you really not care? i love both a lot.
25) If you want (or don’t want) kids, is this something you’ve always known or have you changed your mind as you’ve grown up? i've gone back and forth throughout my life. i'm pretty sure i want them at some point, but there were quite a few years when i was really against it. however, i've always had a love for kids since i was a little girl.
26) Do you believe “once a criminal, always a criminal” or do you think that people can really change and become better? i believe many people can be rehabilitated.
27) Have you ever read a quote or a poem and really connected with it yes.
28) What’s something that really puts you off a person (bad hygiene, whatever)? Are you willing to look past that in order to get to know them properly? their views on kids. even if someone doesn't want kids (as i was at one point in my life), the weird and unnecessary vitriol some people have for kids is so concerning. i would not be able to be in community with someone who held such vile views towards an already vulnerable group.
29) Are you into piercings and tattoos? If not, do you judge people who are, and vice versa? yes, i have several of both.
30) What’s your opinion on places like Seaworld? Do you think keeping whales and dolphins in such small enclosures is cruel or a necessary evil? i hate them. any such establishments need to be closed permanently. there are well-educated rehabilitation establishments that are able to conserve and educate people on sea life and seaworld/other organizations that operate under this guise but really only using them for entertainment is absurdity and cruelty.
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elliebear666 · 1 year
Text
So, despite my depression spirals?
Let's talk about my transition.
Am I in any way regretting the changes? No. Not a single bit. In fact, I'm a little sad in some ways that the changes aren't MORE, ya know... massive? That I didn't develop normal sized and looking breasts. That my face structure is still the same, even if more feminine. That my hips didn't widen. Etc. I'm sad that the effects didn't literally make me female lol and that's the ONLY issue.
What negative effects have I experienced? Hmm... anxiety about not looking feminine enough. Depression about not looking feminine enough. So essentially the same dysphoria I experienced before, only now massively reduced.
Positive things I've experienced?
God, where do I start? Umm... I have developed breasts. They're perky and small, but I wear bras now. It's... as silly as this sounds? Going out and buying bras for myself? Made me so fucking happy. I can't express the euphoria I experienced as a trans girl going to buy bras with my mom. I'm literally going to cry about this. The experiences I never got? Just small things like this? God I... it sounds so silly but it is just... I'm happy.
My hips and butt have both become more full. I feel pretty in tight jeans, and my legs look feminine enough that, as long as I shave my legs, I wear shorts now! I used to HATE shorts because of my leg hair! As a teen, I wanted to shave my legs with my mom's razor but I don't think I did. But, when I was dating a girl, she was insecure about her body hair so I was like... why don't you shave? She was nervous but I said, "Okay. Tell you what. I'll shave too!" In truth? I felt excited at the prospect. I shaved and she shaved. I realized I loved it. She realized she preferred not to. So, I shave pretty often now and feel happy wearing shorts. :)
My experience with estrogen changing my emotions? So... I've always been an emotional person. I'm a big cry baby. But my emotions often felt... like, yes, I experienced numbness and emptiness often but... my experience has become... how do I describe this? More right? When I experience emotions? Like, in the past, I felt like the world was in shades of gray. Everything felt lifeless and empty and cold. And now? I feel like I can see in color. I feel like I'm experiencing emotions that are even more full and robust. I do cry more easily now too. I'm not sure if it's because I am accepting my feelings or because estrogen has caused that change. But I used to be bothered how, as I grew? The changes of testosterone? They were AWFUL.
Let's talk about clothing and style. Ya girl went through a series of aesthetic changes and issues lmao like I didn't know how to dress or fully what I liked. As time has passed, I'm coming into what I like. For the longest time, I wore an oversized rainbow dyed hoodie and jeans/leggings. I wanted to express with my clothing that I was living a light of life and vivacity and vividness. Now? Ya girl is back to wearing a lot of black. I still wear blue jeans, etc. But I don't wear tshirts much if at all unless as a night shirt. I have dresses and skirts and I LOVE some of my dresses to death. I was definitely sad when summer ended and I couldn't wear dresses anymore. But, summer is coming and I can start wearing them again!!!! I love that my outfits say "girl" now. I feel shapely and I feel attractive. Men hit on me which... is an interesting development? Being approached by literal strangers interested in sex or wanting to give me their number is... odd - I accepted one number, but blocked him after a weird call, and shut down everyone else. Especially because most of these men don't know I'm transgender. I haven't been misgendered in years. I do worry about the weight I've lost making me look more masculine though.
Dating as a woman? Existing as a woman in the world? It's been an experience. The level of anxiety and worry I had about passing was astronomical. Now... I get called ma'am, miss, girlfriend. Baby girl... and I just... god. I'm smiling my ass off. I'm a daughter and a sister and an aunt. The level of euphoria I've experienced about the changes to these titles? About my pronouns? She/her/hers. I am beyond happy. I am so fucking happy about this aspect. I didn't want to be a brother or boyfriend or son or uncle or husband or father because... I wasn't a man. I said I didn't want to get married or have children (1. Didn't want to "pass on what I have" 2. Didn't want to be a husband or a father.) Although, there was a person I wanted to marry, I would have... not been able to live as a man to be with this woman. But now? The thought of being a mother? A wife? I could do that. I fact... I would be ecstatic to be someone's wife :) just imagining, "Hey, guys. This is my wife, Ellie!" Shivers! Whenever I adopt? I'll be a mom :) Being a girlfriend is amazing lmao I'm so happy that guys have told me they want me to be their girlfriend.
Let's see... what else?
Learning to change my voice? The level of vocal dysphoria I have experienced in my life has been truly awful. Like... bad. I spent a good couple years feminizing my voice and I am happy with the results. Although I wish it didn't have to be a CHOICE to change my voice, and that was just how it was? I enjoyed the journey aspect of finding my voice. I can now talk and hear a voice that is MINE! Like... this is MY voice! And like... I've cried and laughed and been so fucking euphoric about having a voice that matches who I am. I wish cis people knew what this experience was like for trans people. However? Although I have come to love my voice in its own way, for singing? Um... I still experience dysphoria to a good degree about my singing voice. But, I don't think that's something I could easily change? Especially because of the damage I caused my vocal chords. Like, it is what it is, but... tbh? I was screaming for years because I was in pain. I was angry and hurting and lost and broken and dysphoric. And I was destroying myself. I was destroying myself because the body I inhabited felt so goddamn wrong. Like... fuck. Idek. I'm sorry...
Let's see... what else 🤔
Ahhh, my name!!! So. I wrote a book some time ago. And a character in it was named Ellianore. When I first started considering names? I considered using that name. That's the name I used in online games a lot. But I decided that the Ellianore was... a bit bunch? Um... and I settled on Elleanor instead. Madeline (pronounced madalyn) So, the reason I chose Madeline was... I love the name for one lol. And then... my mom used to call me Mattie as a kid. And the nickname for Madeline is Maddie :) I'm sure you can put two and two together. I felt like it was a nod to the past, to my mom that I love so much, and a brave, bold step into my future. My old name was Matthew Evan. My new name is Elleanor Madeline. The initials just switched around!!! Isn't that cool!?
So?
In summary... the positive I've experienced far, far, far outweigh the negative. The negative being shit I already dealt with, just now not as severe and mitigated as best I can at current. I have no regrets. This is who I am and what I needed. I'm experiencing euphoria, living a life that feels authentic. And I am finally finding contentment in myself as a person.
I guess... some of my regrets would be that I didn't transition as a teen. I do regret that. And I regret how I allowed myself to act due to my pain and depression with my life. I've hurt people I love... and I so very much regret to my core these mistakes.
I look forward to the future. I look forward to my surgery. I look forward to the years I have left in which I can live and love authentically.
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violets · 1 year
Note
helloo again from your psc secret santa! :)
I also think b&w + red is amazing (tho I personally tend to go more for some kind of warm shade of yellow; like little gold speckles in a sad monochrome world 😩👌)
and I feel you about the age thing :') usually my own age doesn't bother me so much but then I remember things like 'my little brother turned 18 this year' and it's like...nO he didn't?! stOP the passage of time PLS!!?
the book you mentioned sound so interesting!! 👀 who knew I would get reading recs out of secret santa hehe (definitely not complaining tho!)
and, um, nah...I don't think I've quite mastered typography either :') I feel like I always end up doing the same boring thing lol...but I'm gonna see if I can include some transitions in your gift, that would be fun! ;)
cat, at this point I feel like we're the same person basically because, guess what, I also love me an unhinged woman and also really messed up morally grey characters in general 🙏 basically people who would be absolutely horrible to be around irl but I sure love to watch them descend into madness aaahhh
I actually don't have any more gift related questions for you rn and hope to post your gift asap but maybe tell me if you have any exciting plans for this upcoming weekend? or are you still swamped with school? either way, I hope you're hanging in there! sending good vibes and much love! 😎🎅💕
omg i missed this! hi santa <3
oooooh warm shade of yellow? one single thread of gold tied me to you... in some sense i can't wait to find out who you are so i can check out your gold-speckled creations!!!
honestly it's been so fun talking to you bc as you've said we're the same person!! i feel like as much as sometimes it's just comforting to get into something that i know is safe and good, it's also really cool to try and tackle things that are less comfortable! people are fucked up by nature and it's interesting to see how we navigate that and learn to live around it. also perfect characters do not drive conflict, and without conflict there can be no plot... so often the most fucked up characters are the most interesting!
about the gift, please don't worry about when you post or what kind of effects etc you're going to include aaaa i'm really not picky! typography is so hard and most things are so hard and life. is just hard. so i'm just happy to be on the receiving end of anything aaaaa
how have you been? has life been good to you so far this month? i've still got one last assignment (that i don't really have motivation for rip) but i'm hanging in there! i guess my main plan is just to get it done so i can finally relax a little, and maybe get cracking writing christmas cards... what about you?
either way i've had such a great time talking to you and i have a feeling we'd be fast friends!! take your time sweetheart ily <3
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