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humusboii2thereturnoftheking · 3 months

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A Morrocan ex-Muslim take on the Palestinian-Israeli conflict.

This is again taken from reddit, text was posted by user named u/Benjazzi. I found it a very insightful read and I hope you will too:

I'm from Morocco. I'm atheist but my entire family is muslim. When it comes to the Israel-Palestine conflict, some muslims, sadly, can really go insane. For them, it's our tribe (Palestine moslems) against the enemy tribe.

Israel bombed South Lebanon after Lebanon bombed them ? "It never happened"

Israel stormed the holy Al Aqsa mosque because people throwing rocks took refuge inside of it ? "I don't believe it"

Mass Rapes ? "Fake news. It never happened"

"Our tribe can do no wrong" is literally how many people think.

To be fair, Jews can be tribal. But it's frankly nowhere to the same extent. The Jewish press is full of critics of the Israeli government and debates. Honestly, I have found that as long as you don't sing "Death to Israel" and are respectful, you can have very constructive conversation with most Jews and Israelis, even if you are critical. That's because they have a tradition of debate. Sadly, the muslim world lacks this.

Saudi Arabia just bought Cristiano Ronaldo for $1 billion. I have seen people on arab social media argue that Saudi Arabia doesn't help Palestinians because... the Saudi Prince is a puppet on a jewish-american string. It's totally stupid. He has publically humiliated the President of the United States.

Why he doesn't help ? Well. The explanation is simple. He doesn't give a fuck. But the idea that a sovereign arab leader might not care about "our tribe" is so shocking and so disturbing that some people need to find sinister foreign hands to explain it.

Egypt is right now shooting people who try to leave Gaza. I have seen Egyptians argue that the Egyptian President is....secretly jewish. "Sisi is a jewish dog, his mom is jewish". I mean... really 🤔 ?

The idea that a sovereign arab leader might not care about "our tribe" is so shocking and so disturbing to them that many Egyptians have to find some insane conspiracy to explain it.

This is the kind of cognitive dissonance that I sadly see all around me.

NYT publishes an investigation critical of Israeli behavior? I post it online. Reactions on social media ? "Great job ! Fucking zionist pigs. The New York Times just exposed them"

NYT publishes an investigation critical of Palestinian behavior ? I post it online. Reactions on social media ? "Fuck your propaganda. New York Times is pure zionist filth"

"Our tribe can do no wrong".

A newspaper is reliable or fake... simply depending on how it portrays the tribe !!

Then you have Islamism on top of that. The cherry on the chocolate cake.

Read the comment I posted here :

The real problem today in our world is a guy called Sayed El Qutb.

He was an egyptian intellectual who is considered the father of ALL Islamists.

In his books, he argues that the best period for muslims was under the Islamic Caliphates, when the entire world respected and feared muslims. He believes the Islamic World went through cultural, political and economic decline due to not enough Islam. According to him, only a return to PURE Islam™ can make muslims great again. Sayed El Qutb endorsed creating an Islamic State based exclusively on Sharia Law. He praised violent jihad against the non-muslims (kouffars). He opposed secularism, gender mixing, and hated jews ("filthy pigs") and atheists.

He was hanged in 1964 for attempting to murder President Nasser. But his books have spread very successfully. Sayd Qutb is to islamists what Karl Marx was to communists. Al Qaeda, ISIS, Hamas, Hezbollah, Al Nosra front. All of their creators read his books and deeply admired him.

3 countries are particularly behind Islamism : Saudi Arabia, Iran and Qatar.

The first one is Saudi Arabia. In the 70s, using their oil money, they opened a special university called the University of Madinah. Anyone can go study there for free to become an Imam. Saudis will pay your tuition and boarding school. Your food ? They will pay for it. These imams all learned the ideas of Sayed Al Qutb. Westerners are filth, jews are vile pigs, women must obey men, women must be veiled, secularism is a form of mental disease.

After graduating , these Saudi-trained Imams were sent back to their country in Africa, Europe, or Malaysia, to spread Saudi soft power. And this happened for decades and decades. They were the most successful in 2 countries in particular : Pakistan and Egypt. In these countries, a generation of public school teachers received Saudi textbooks. Imagine the result on the general population.

The second country to blame for Islamism is Iran.

In 1979, a secular dictatorwas overthrowed and replaced by a religious dictator. Ayatollah Khomenei became Supreme Guide of the Revolution. He always wears a black turban on his head. That black turban means he is "sayyed", a direct descendent of Muhammed. Ayatollah Khomenei was a deep admirer of Sayed Qutb. He translated all Sayed El Qutb's work into Farsi to "educate iranian people".

His new Islamic regime started using their oil money to fund $$$ radical islamic groups all around the Middle East. In Irak, in Pakistan, Lebanon, in Syria. His successor, "Ayatollah Khamanei" has pursed his heritage. Iran published a Fatwa calling for any muslim who can to murder the UK poet Salman Rushdie for his books. Salman Rushdie has been forced to live in hiding for 20 years. He was recently stabbed during a literary festival in America.

In 1984, Iran published an official postal stamp paying tribune to Sayed El Qutb, calling him a true martyr of Islam. Also, several streets and avenues in Iran were named "Qutb" as a tribute.

The third country to blame is Qatar. They are the favorite headquarter of all islamists in the world today. Al Nosra Front, Al Qaeda, Hamas, The Afghan Talibans. You always find Qatar.

In Morocco, Qataris are big supporters of the local Islamists (حركة التوحيد والإصلاح)

I can testify that what Al Jazeera spreads in arabic is far far worse than what they actually say in english. They had a TV show with a guy called Youssef Al Qaradawi. This guy is a disciple of Sayed El Qutb. He tells people it's okay to beat up your wife, that jews are disgusting pigs, that Islam will take over Europe. His TV show was watched by 60 million people every week on Al Jazeera Arabic. 60 million people. Every week. In 1998, they published a documentary called "Ben Laden : One man standing against an empire"

Here is another thing you won't see in Al Jazeera English. Basically, the rape, slaughter and torture of Israeli civilians is just presented as "a wonderful victory" on Al Jazeera Arabic. That's it. They won't give any more detail. No pictures. Anyone who seriously studies the military tactics of Hamas, reading academic papers, comes to the conclusion that the Israelis - whatever you think about them - aren't actually lying. Hamas really does use Palestinians as Human Shields. It's never mentioned on Al Jazeera. Never. In fact, their "journalists" told a palestinian shouting this to shut his damn mouth.

Saudi Arabia, Iran and Qatar. These 3 countries have become the cancer of Islam.

And they have used their money to spread their influence, including in Morocco. Now the cancer has spread.

The question is how do we cure it? I don't know. I have small hopes for Saudi Arabia because even if their Prince is a dictator, he genuinely wants to improve his country. He is reforming textbooks to remove antisemitism, allowing women to drive, allowing music, ending forced gender segregation, etc... But the other two countries remain a major problem.

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bookgirl120720 · 1 year

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As I've learned and grown and my relationships have progressed, I've started to become more and more convinced that enforced monogamy is actively harming society. Now, I want to start by clarifying that I have nothing against monogamy. I don't think there's anything wrong with it, I don't think monogamous relationships always fail, none of that. I just think that as an enforced institution, it creates some insanely harmful learned attitudes and behaviors. These are purely my opinions and the only people I know for certain my preferred style of relationship works for are me and the people I'm with.

First off, I feel like the learned jealousy that monogamy enforces can do a lot of damage to a relationship. The idea of being jealous or threatened when a partner is attracted to, spends a lot of time with, or is even intimate with someone else is entirely a social construct. Like, I'm not saying it doesn't happen, but it is a common consensus that getting jealous of a partner's close friend is unreasonable. And yet it is considered completely reasonable to take issue with your partner even being attracted to other people. It doesn't make sense.

For another thing, it inextricably binds sex and romance in a way that I think harms a lot of relationships. The amount of times I've seen or heard of relationships being destroyed because of sexual dissatisfaction is ridiculous. The general societal response to this is to assert that the romantic connection should be more powerful than the sexual one, and I agree, but people never take that to what I feel is often the logical conclusion. Uncoupling romantic love from sexual attraction means that people aren't forced to make an arbitrary choice between two things that, frankly, I don't feel have much material connection. I have a hard time understanding why we allow loving relationships to be destroyed because something that some people consider a basic need must go unfulfilled for them to prosper.

And drawing on that concept, a lot of issues that we see today with toxic masculinity and incel culture also draw on this notion of this enforced link between sex and romantic relationships, in this case in that many men are incapable of separating one from the other. When you examine incel culture, what you realize is that these are people who don't want a relationship. They want sex. These ideas of basically pretending to be someone's friend just so that you can sleep with them and that being "nice" entitles you to a woman's body are direct products of a few ideas reenforced by monogamous culture. One is that the criteria for a romantic partner and a sexual partner are exactly the same. This inability to realize that a woman's standards for who they would date, who they would be friends with, and who they would sleep with stem in no small part from the fact that many people are trained to believe that the ideal romantic partner is just a really good friend who you sleep with, while also being taught that a romantic partner is by definition a sexual one and that the criteria must therefore be the same. This creates cognitive dissonance when one realizes that physical attractiveness does often factor into one's sexual preferences. It creates this twofold false assumption where the criteria for a friend and a romantic partner are the exact same, but also somehow the way you look factors into the criteria for a romantic partner because the criteria for a romantic partner and a sexual partner are somehow the same. It is utterly false nonsense, makes no sense, and I doubt even many monogamous people would agree with that logic. When sex and romance are uncoupled, what you realize is that someone wants some things in a romantic partner, some things in a sexual one, and those things don't always line up. A romantic partner is not just a friend, and a friend is definitely not by definition a sexual partner. It dashes away that learned fantasy. Additionally, it prevents romantic feelings from being manipulated and used as tools for sexual purposes. Now I'm not saying for a second that this is the sole factor in these gross cultures, but enforced monogamy does definitely feed into the mindset.

None of this has even begun to acknowledge the existence of asexuality. That sounds like it's own rant and this is already a disjointed midnight word vomit. Please be kind if I haven't made my points well, for I am unfathomably eepy, and please keep in mind that this is not meant to be an attack on monogamy as anything other than an enforced institution. I have lots of monogamous friends, I swear!

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turtlemagnum · 1 year

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i get that i'm probably in the minority at this point, but as someone who grew up with pokemon i have Negative Opinions of the later generations, in terms of pokemon design that is. i do think that after a while, they simplified their art style a lot in order to make more easily marketable guys, easier to make plushies and toys of i guess. but i also think that a lot of their designs are just getting Stupid, and they're (understandably) running out of ideas when they're expected to make 50+ guys every generation every few years for 20+ years straight. i genuinely feel like early on, it started off as "woah... what if we made THIS THING that i GENUINELY THINK IS COOL....", and it just happened to get absurdly popular because hey, it was genuinely cool in a lot of cases. meanwhile i think that when pokemon stopped being the passion project of a few goons doing what they loved and became A Massive Multimedia Franchise that has to Appeal To Everyone, i feel like a lot of it lost its charm, y'know? for me, i think designs and the style were really solid up until gen 4, and even with gen 4 i feel like most of the guys were pretty alright, though there's definitely a lot more misses in gen 4 than there were in 3 (which, to be fair, i consider gens 2-3 to have the most insane batting ratio throughout the series, even gen 1 has more stinkers than most dorks like me would generally admit).

i do think that things got Actually Bad in terms of design with gen 5, though. though with that being said, i also feel like gen 5 gets a lot more hate than it deserves, and it's frankly probably the least shit in terms of design of what i'd consider to be Late Gen. i do like emolga, a whole lot. but, i'd say that virtually all of gen 5's guys, with very few exceptions, Fuckign Sucked. same with gen 6, i will say that i like sylveon, but frankly i feel like it'd be harder to fuck up an eveelution than it would to make a good one. i do, however, kinda think that fairy type is lame, at least insofar as how i loved my gardevoir being a pure psychic. but alas, it's not like i'm gonna play a mainline game past gen 4 at this point anyways. again, in gen 6, we see like, one good guy, and a whole bunch of shit. though i will say that the worst of gen 5 is like, Offensively Bad, while the worst of gen 6 is just kinda fucking bland. from then on, though? i genuinely can't think of a single guy from gens 7-9 that actually fucking appeal to me. i did this little thing where you pick your favorite guys from each gen from each type, and it was like... wow, all of these past a certain point Fuckign Suck.

now, i don't think that this is the end of the world, frankly, i feel like it's only natural for a grown ass man to not find kid shit appealing. but, that being said, even when i was An Actual Kid who was growing up on the tail end of gen 4 and the beginning of gen 5, even back then i had negative opinions of whatever the fuck was going on with gen 5, though i didn't really have the language to express it in a meaningful way. and i mean like An Actual kid to say like, i was literally 9. but i also grew up on the older gens before that, though i will admit that gens 1-3 tend to run pretty indistinctly for me in some ways, since i was very young and also the first pokemon game i could call my own was mystery dungeon: red rescue team, which more or less presented the first 3 gens of guys as One Whole Group, which was pretty easy back then and would be significantly harder to pull off with the sheer Dissonance between early gen and late gen shit

now, i'm gonna do some pre-emptive defense of myself to Late Gen Bootlickers and say which early gen guys i genuinely dislike, and say which late gen guys i genuinely like, as a little bit to balance out the bashing that i've done: i think tangela's a bit shit. same with muk/grimer. i think voltorb only really works as a surprise encounter the first time and as a pokemon it's kinda meh. drowzee and hypno are Gross & Grody and should be cut, frankly, though this may just be me as someone whose spent too much damn time on the internet. same with lickitung and mr mime, frankly. unown is stupid. bullshit alphabet ass waste of a dex space. volbeat and illumise are just kinda eh. i don't think if they were never designed, the world would be an appreciably different place.

i like the purrloin line. pidove is cute. scolipede is genuinely kinda cool. i love sandile. minncino is cute. emolga is probably my favorite guy from gen 5 onwards, and frankly is one of my favorite guys out of the whole series. dedenne is kinda cute. i like tepig and litten (but not what they evolve into). the rockruff line is good. mimikyu is genuinely kinda clever and also pretty cute. yamper and boltund (especially boltund) are pretty cute. uhhh, that's all i can really think of

(gen 4 was left out of this entirely because i consider it to be a very transitory kinda deal, if i said every guy i liked and didn't like from gen 4 both of these lists would be at least twice as long as they are, since i think in terms of design, it's probably the most mixed in terms of both good and bad designs, albeit with a decent lean towards good)

now, do i hate pokemon? can't say i do, hate is a strong word, and while strong is the best thing a thing can be, i can't bring myself to feel that strongly about pokemon as it exists. pokemon as it was, though? i genuinely love, even today. i still semi regularly replay the first PMD game, sometimes i choose one of the gens from 1-4 to play through (though i've never gotten that far into gen 4 while i've beaten the first 3, some multiple times). i think what i'm trying to get at here, is that pokemon can be great, but i genuinely feel as though it's gotten appreciably worse in recent years, and i feel as though a pretty significant part of that for me is the character design. i think this might matter a bit more to me than the average person? and i almost certainly have different sensibilities than a fair amount of people. but i genuinely find it hard to enjoy a piece of media if i don't like the character designs, especially if i find the designs stupid. part of why i hate a lot of post warhammer40k fantasy and scifi so unappealing is that i think the character designs are Genuinely Dogshit. pauldrons big enough to work double duty as horse blinders, dipshit thick swords that probably couldn't cut a stick of butter, much less be used in actual combat, that sorta shit. the same goes for me and pokemon, i think. like, wow, that's just a fucking pair of keys. it's a fucking apple. that is literally just a fucking tumbleweed. terrible, though the ones i'm thinking of are just the Particularly Egregious ones, i will say that on a very fundamental level, i find a lot of the "normal" designs deeply unappealing. a lot of them illicit the same response to my brain as looking at an unethically bred animal, like a pug. like damn dude, you should NOT exist, you're a testament to the technological and ecological hubris of mankind.

which isn't to say that if i were Actually There In Real, i wouldn't feel a little different about it. like a pug in real life, i still go to pet it because it's a living being with love in its heart, even if it was bred into a little freak of nature, that's not their fault, y'know? poor little guy, have a treat. i feel like if i met the little bread dog creature i'd be a bit disconcerted, but i'd still be nice to it, y'know? some of them would absolutely be out of fear, though. personally, i'd rather not be chokeslammed by whatever furrybait dude that i'm around, y'know?

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racingtoaredlight · 1 year

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I just don’t like this guy...

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I’ve watched this entire video a few times...it’s fantastic even if the host is blatantly lying to you.

Jacob Collier, if you’re not familiar, is a very talented multi-instrumentalist that has gotten a good amount of buzz from doing a lot of online shit and lectures. He’s really known for doing remakes of well-known songs where he plays all the instruments and does all the vocal harmonies.

I should revere him as a walking god. At the very least, a living Mozart. But I don’t.

The biggest reason I hate the Beatles isn’t their music or lack of musicianship. They’d be perfectly forgettable if that’s all there was to it. But you can’t mention the Beatles in any public forum outside of the most radiant positive light without inciting a near riot. And Jacob Collier fans have quickly become just as zealous and violent.

What makes the video at the top great is that it’s one of the few criticisms of Collier that exist outside comment sections or forums. The host does his absolute very best to stay politically correct and not justifiably rip into him...but his face tells the whole story.

Simply put...this guy is a highly educated, professional vocal coach who knows all the how’s and why’s. His face tells the entire story. He might go and say “oh he’s really talented and makes it work,” but down deep? He’s disgusted at what he’s hearing.

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The video at the top is peppered with these moments where his inner disgust comes to the surface. And you gotta give this guy props if you listen to the whole thing...he does his damndest to stay objective and say nice things about Collier, but...

When you really devote yourself to the study of a particular area...where you painfully break yourself down and face truths that fundamentally fuck your head up...and some guy comes prancing in pretending to be a deity, there’s going to be some cognitive dissonance there. You can only tell pretty lies for so long until the truth feels like it’s going to erupt sideways and cause a mile of mountain to displace itself at the sound of speed while Dave Crockett films darkness from beside his Seattle KOMO news car on a miraculously undamaged logging road.

Was that callback too hamfisted?

Maybe it was, but I like it.

***

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The big difference between the Beatles hype and Collier’s is that Collier is actually trying to be proficient at the thing he’s supposed to be doing. And I’m not going to shit all over this, because I think...for the most part...it’s really nice. There are parts in there that are really, really nice...which is one of my biggest issues with Collier.

Those home runs should be the meat of the song. The spoke of the metaphorical wheel. They shouldn’t be quickly abandoned because of ADHD.

Check out 3:50-4:10. My goodness that is good stuff. He goes from a nice little counterpoint-style riff in the higher registers and gradually moves down, octave by octave, filling up the space...which is fucking awesome when he abruptly changes key at the bottom. Just insanely good, high-level shit tucked into a simple presentation. Men have made careers out of much less.

The problem is...this is a single moment.

If you pay attention to the majority of the rest of this...whenever he’s singing, the piano disappears. Now, singing and playing at the same time is difficult, and something I can’t do. But he can’t really do it either...and for that 20 seconds of greatness, we have 7 minutes of him trying to find the keys on the keyboard.

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Collier’s big thing is that he plays a ton of instruments. Singing, keys, guitar, bass, uke, banjo, drums, whatever...

Which is cool...I guess?...frankly the most impressive part of this is how it gets put together and edited. Because when you talk to musicians specializing on a certain instrument that Collier plays, that’s when the real criticisms come out. Almost immediately this gets dismissed as sour grapes or jealousy, but it’s not...

The vocal coach at the top...there are times watching Collier where he’s legitimately confused as to what he’s hearing. It’s not because Collier’s not pulling it off, or because the coach is trying to be mean to an amateur...it’s because Collier’s billed as literally Mozart.

And for any musician who knows that instrument he’s playing really well, it’s readily apparent that he’s pretty mediocre on all of them. Technique and musicianship matter to people like us, and when...say...a pianist sees Collier playing like this?

Are we back in 1st grade piano lessons again? Because that’s 1st grade shit. What about bass?

Lol tiny gif of Tiny Desk concert.

I wrote a post awhile back about how you can tell a musician’s proficiency by looking at their hands and wrists. Specifically mentioning how bent wrists like that are an easy way to identify musicians that haven’t put time in on their instrument.

This is important.

When you go through the gauntlet of getting proficient, you quickly realize that everything technical boils down to efficiency. Getting the most out of every movement. Why is this important for bassists? Because the number one responsibility a bassist has is THE GROOVE. Keeping time. Efficiency means better time being able to be sustained longer because you’re expending less energy.

Start the video below at 2:50

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What we have here are three of the greatest slap bassists of all time, masturbating in public to their heart’s delight. They are playing way, WAY more stuff than Collier is...and yet, do any of them have that jerky movement? That bent wrist? No. Because he hasn’t put in the hours.

Yet, Collier has been a featured guest on the biggest bass podcast/YouTube channel in the world multiple times for insight into playing bass. He’s presented as an expert. But he’s not.

Does he have some profiency? Yes he does. He gets a good sound on his bass, it fits the role and the song, and I’m not complaining about him being able to lay down a 4th grade bassline...I’m complaining about him being hailed as some musical genius.

Lets look at guitar.

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Lets move on incredibly quickly, otherwise I’ll spend another 3,000 words on everything wrong with this. Goddamnit, I found another one. This is some of the legitimately worst guitar playing I’ve seen from a professional. And here’s a total no-show. If you’re supposedly Mozart, how you gonna be completely invisible on a stage with 3 people? Seriously, he might as well not even be there.

If he was behind a piano, it’d likely be a different story. But he chose to bring a guitar up there, and you’d think a guy with his knowledge of theory wouldn’t be so shoved in the background by the astoundingly mediocre John Mayer...or his voice wouldn’t be able to cut through the cacophony of...a garden variety chick singer?

That’s exactly what the voice coach at the top was talking about! His vocal technique works in his vacuum...but when you play with other people, technique matters.

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There was a guy a two years above me at North Texas that is what people say Collier is. He was the lead alto sax in the One O’ Clock Band (despite it being collegiate, it’s one of the best big bands in the world)...was as good of a guitarist as I was, played bass, led church bands on keyboards, played drums and did all sorts of computer programming for music composition and recording.

His proficiency on keys was as comprehensive as it was on sax. He led bands because, not only did he know all the parts, but he could play all the parts on whatever instrument. It was incredible to get the few chances to play with him...and after that, it’s pretty easy to see Collier’s not a musician in the same class in terms of performance. Theoretically is a different story, but in terms of what his hands are doing, he’s pretty amateur on most of the instruments he plays.

Collier’s greatness is his mind. His knowledge of harmony and theory is bulletproof from criticism as far as I’m concerned. I don’t care for his voice, but I certainly respect his ability to match pitches and organize harmony. His arrangements are excellent, period.

And while there’s novelty to being a multi-instrumentalist recording every part of a song, and that is certainly something that was very marketable during the COVID lockdowns, a lot that falls flat when the underlying foundation isn’t solid.

I don’t think you can make the argument that his abilities on guitar or bass are solid. Criticisms there are completely legitimate, because it’s obvious he hasn’t put in the hours. I mean, how could he?

I studied classical and jazz guitar at the same time. While it’s “the same instrument” the disciplines are completely foreign to each other. It was difficult to the point where I couldn’t imagine getting proficient on multiple instruments like that, for no other reason than there are only so many hours in the day.

When you look at his skillset, it’s obvious that his talent lies on the keys and with his voice. But all the time he spends on these other instruments...merely for novelty and showmanship, not for musical reasons...and it neuters the overall production. Delegation is not a new phenomenon here...a pro bassist can fill that slot so you can fix your sketchy piano technique, and make better music moving forward.

Just because you “can” doesn’t mean you should.

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episodeoftv · 8 months

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Round 5 of 8

propaganda and summaries are under the cut (May include spoilers)

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: 6.07 Once More, With Feeling

tw for dealing with depression and suicidal thoughts

In this musical extravaganza, Sunnydale residents find themselves bursting into song, and flame, when a demon attempts to make Dawn his bride.

The greatest musical episode of all time! Pretty much all of the songs are unironically bangers, it's better choreographed and shot than frankly a lot of the bad movie musicals that have been inflicted on us in the past few years, and despite the goofy concept it still manages to tell an incredibly affecting story about the protagonist's struggle with depression. Pulls off an absolutely monumental tonal shift from comedic musical theatre homage to devastating emotional gut punch that manages to never feel tonally dissonant / Best musical episode ever (character development, lots of bops, and spontaneous combustion)

It is the best musical episode of any TV series. It is whimsical, but also far from filler and major plot beats happen while the characters sing jaunty little toons about them. Willow and Tara have sex. Spike gets and angsty alt rock song about his unrequited buffy crush. Buffy admits that when her friends resurrected her she was violently ripped out of heaven and doesn't wanna be on earth anymore. Spike and Buffy kiss. Its the best.

Invented musical episodes and is also one of the only good ones ever to have been made. Changed the game. Insane that it’s as good as it is.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Once_More,_with_Feeling_(Buffy_the_Vampire_Slayer)

Community: 2.23 A Fistful of Paintballs / 2.24 For A Few Paintballs more

tw i guess paintball guns and pretend death (?)

In a "spaghetti western" parody, Pierce tries to get revenge on the rest of the study group during this year's paintball tournament. / When the study group learns that there's a sinister plot behind the paintball tournament, they unite the remaining players to defeat the enemy.

community's paintball episodes are legendary by themselves, but i do feel like this one shows a lot of character development and a well thought out plot that involves every character and is still funny and easy enough to follow not to need a lot of concentration to watch it

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Fistful_of_Paintballs / https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/For_a_Few_Paintballs_More

#buffy the vampire slayer #btvs #community #poll #polls #round5

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bthump · 2 years

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What is your honest opinion on Femto raping Casca? Do you think that this was necesarry for Casca (or even Griffiths) character? Or do you think this couldve easily been avoided and replaced with something different?

My honest opinion on it is that not only was it unnecessary at the time, it was actively detrimental to NeoGriffith, Casca's, and Guts' characters, and it should either have been replaced with something different, or it should've at least been depicted much, much differently.

It's detrimental to NGriff's character because it literally hasn't affected his narrative, which has been written with the tone and emotional beats of a second protagonist. Obviously some tonal dissonance is intentional since NGriff is a demon god, but we're still supposed to be at least tempted to root for him. Scenes like chapter 285 just don't work if you view NGriff as an unforgiveable demonic entity - his reintroduction to Midland as he takes over is played for triumphant smug comedy lol, not horror, and if you can't view Griffith through moral shades of grey, which adding a petty just-for-fun rape scene certainly makes a lot more difficult, it falls completely flat.

Of course to be fair tone is pretty subjective and highly dependant on the tropes and conventions of a genre and wider media landscape. What doesn't work for an English-speaking readership might work for a Japanese readership just because our media expectations are a little different.

But I also have a giant bone to pick with the way it fucks with the basic themes of NGriff's story too, so either way I have something to complain about lol.

It was completely unnecessary for Casca because the Eclipse rape's sole purpose for her character was to explain why she wasn't around in the Black Swordsman arc, by driving her insane for 20 real life years. Imo almost any plotline would've been better than that for her, including a badass death during the Eclipse. Whatever was going to happen now that her mind is restored didn't have a hope in hell of making up for everything from then til now lol, and frankly it had a good chance of making it worse with the wildly ooc motherly instincts derailing her personality on top of the insanity.

And it's detrimental to Guts' character because it straight up replaces his trauma with manpain to the jawdropping extent that Guts' own rape never comes up again, except vaguely in a flashback, even when he sexually assaults Casca. Like I straight up don't believe that he would have a flashback during consensual sex and then it wouldn't even cross his mind after nearly raping her.

The caveat to that is that I wanted to believe that Guts' own personal pain and trauma would affect the story again quite soon, and that his focus on Casca was being deliberately written as a distraction from his own issues. But even if I was right about that and it's not just wishful thinking lol, it doesn't make the Eclipse rape necessary.

Plus in the Black Swordsman and early Golden Age arcs the source of Guts' rage was that the sacrifice mirrored Gambino selling him to Donovan, which was very good, neat writing that perfectly explained everything about Black Swordsman Guts and made his attitude interesting and complex. Replacing that with the - pointedly cuckoldy - rape scene we got is such a fucking letdown in comparison.

Like to be completely fair you can read a decent amount of depth into the Eclipse rape if you choose to - cycle of abuse, Griffith reversing the perceived sexualized power dynamic pre-eclipse, Griffith negating his rescue of Casca, Casca being unable to escape violent misogyny no matter what, Femto as Griffith’s inner self-loathing externalizing it in a typically monstrous way, rape as the most thematically on point expression of humanity’s darkness, a reference to Guts’ childhood trauma, yadda yadda yadda - but honestly I genuinely feel like most if not all of that is an inadvertant result of rape being such a major part of the story that when you make your climax a rape scene it’s impossible not to draw connections lol.

And none of those connections are necessary to the story imo, and none of them even seem depicted in the actual scene itself, thanks to how badly it’s written and drawn. So yeah, if I could I’d love to just throw it all out.

I think Casca should’ve died with Judeau, and Guts should’ve been enraged by the act of sacrifice, as was implied in the Black Swordsman and early Golden Age arcs, and the story would be neater and tighter and much better without the Eclipse rape as a centrepiece.

The only problem with this is that Guts would need a new post-Eclipse storyline, or the story would have to end at the Eclipse (though honestly, I think that would've also worked great). Like, unfortunately, the Eclipse rape is necessary to the plot of the rest of the story, but like - Miura could’ve written anything, and I’d be happy to ditch the rape scene and heavily alter Guts’ storyline afterwards. No ghost kid, no manly man protecting his helpless infantilized girlfriend, maybe even no entourage of small children while I’m imagining better alternatives lol.

Miura has said in the Official Guidebook interview that he needed Casca to live specifically so Guts wouldn’t be able to make new friends and move on from the Eclipse, which I kind of get honestly. He can’t have 200 more chapters worth of repetitive grimdark blackswordsman content, he has to show some character growth but with something to pull him back when the time is right, presumably. But like - have him run into Griffith again, have someone else betray him and send him spiraling, have Guts unable to fully move on because he’s got a demon dog taunting him and he’s being forced to fight ghosts every night, yk? There were other options here.

#anonymous #ask #thanks for the ask! i tried to be fairly thorough #scene: eclipse rape #theme: critique #theme: misogyny #a #b

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seasurfacefullofclouds1 · 2 years

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Do you remember a few years ago when Chelsea Handler was talking about Harry and said one of her friends asked if she slept with him yet and she was like ?? And they were like yeah he’s known for sleeping with older women or whatever and idk if she said he slept with her friends but I remember my tl was enraged and were like steps away from plotting her death istg it was insane. Anyways I saw a tiktok of her interviewing someone else and I was like oh my god!! That’s her!! They made it out like she was lying for attention despite nobody even seeing or remembering the interview I think it’s probably from 2016 maybe 2017 and it’s just funny how larries insisted she was like and now…

The article where Chelsea Handler states her friends have slept with Harry is still up, but the video has been removed. This took place during Dunkirk promo in July 2017.

Chelsea Handler’s manager is Irving Azoff.

Handler met Harry years before that, when Irving was courting Harry in 2014.

(Sadly, I’ll quote this 2014 post on fans’ fantasies of Harry’s loyalties in 2014: “The Azoffs are not just to further Harry's career but also to further One Direction's on a whole. Harry works hard to secure those outlets and management pushes it so take a step back before you think you understand what is going on.”)

The famous bikini bottom photo in 2015:

Handler’s long, “personal” interview of Styles was published to introduce his solo persona in Another Man magazine, September 2016.

Chelsea Handler and Harry Styles at the Azoff family home while celebrating Irving’s birthday, in 2017.

In other words, Chelsea Handler, a public figure who has been reliably loyal to Irving Azoff for many years, was delegated to help launch Harry’s career.

Handler’s comments about Harry’s sex life have never been accidental: accidents simply are not Irving Azoff’s modus operandi.

Harry’s career was launched with every angle thought out, every interviewer and question pre-vetted, every answer written down and rehearsed, every piece of clothing, book, costume, accessory calculated for sales, down to meticulously copying old rock stars of the past. The timing of Harry’s public appearances, his social media, his fan interactions, etc. have all been executed like a war strategy.

Handler didn’t push an image contrary to how Harry wants to be perceived. Rather, she was promoting the brand of Harry-the-womanizer-who-loves-sleeping-with-older-woman, a brand that has now been fully realized with actor/director Olivia Wilde.

(To be fair, Harry’s taste in women was never exclusively milfs, but also extended to young ladies like Townes Adair Jones— ladies whose dads proudly go on television to brag about their relationship. Very coincidentally Townes was also an Azoff friend!!! Although these days, no-names aren’t as useful to Harry. Keep dreaming, Harries!)

It almost doesn’t matter whether Harry thought through the implications, because for all intents and purposes, he has been his public persona for as long as he’s known Azoff— close to 9 years now— almost his entire career.

The cognitive dissonance of Larries insisting that Harry is the exact opposite of every one of his interviews and photoshoots (every magazine cover), the opposite of the person his closest friends say he is, that a manager he trusts and loves paints him to be, that his values and friend groups demonstrate he is and has been for years— is frankly astounding. Since Harry left the band, there has been six years of evidence. The Larrie thought process is like a toddler taking in the world around them, but still insisting that their world is a replica of their favorite Disney cartoon… even into their adulthood.

#harry styles #chelsea handler #irving azoff #olivia wilde #townes adair jones #carolina

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whetstonefires · 3 years

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I read a bit of Tom King's run (up to the War of Jokes and Riddles) at the library forever ago at a whim and then forgot about it in the time it took for the next trade to release. I'm considering finishing my read-through of the run but I'm wondering what all the controversy is about and if it's worth my.time? Is it just his characterization of Bruce and the failed Batcat wedding, or are there other problems with his writing? I'm asking you since you seem like a thoughtful person.

Aw, thanks, I try! I have many thoughts, at least.

Well, keeping in mind that I did not read the thing through properly myself, but kept up with it via issue excerpts and play-by-plays, here's my understanding of what's The Matter With tom king's run on Batman.

It more or less breaks down into two categories, Fuck Pacing and Fuck Character, both of which honestly belong under the superset of:

King bit off more than he could chew, and was doing that middle-aged dude thing where every element of a story fundamentally only matters inasmuch as it impacts and symbolizes Main Character Dude's ongoing Psychic Journey.

So it's not just that he built up the batcat wedding and then called it off in a really uninspiring way, it's that in the name of building up the romance with Selina as the most moving and pivotal thing in Bruce's life with the potential to fix how generally fucked up he is through Love, all other attachments were violently undercut.

It's not just that he had Bruce hit Tim while emotionally compromised but not remotely under the kind of duress or altered perception that would make it anything but 'lashing out at his kid who had done literally nothing wrong,' it's that King felt it made sense to do this as a drama note to sell that Bruce was being 'broken,' and required no further follow-up as an event in itself.

Because the supporting cast aren't characters in their own right, they're enhancement elements for the main character's personal drama.

(This is as someone who's on the record of disapproving of Robin as child endangerment, so either he's a hypocrite or he doesn't see the difference between the formalized genre element and the direct violence. I think probably, based on the rest of his stuff, King has trouble breaking metaphors and symbols down into smaller pieces and considering the impact of context on their gestural effect, and that's why a lot of his drama is scaled weirdly, but this isn't a theory I could back up strongly on the basis of citeable evidence.)

And it's not just that the entire Bane-has-conquered-Gotham storyline was imbued with huge melodrama that wasn't in any way earned, considering the minimal buildup and largely offscreen incoherence of how this was handled, it's that it was consistently important only inasmuch as it affected Bruce.

So if he needed to go sit on a beach and Do Vacation with Selina while everyone else coped with the situation in Gotham, there was no reason to stress out about it or find it tonally dissonant. The story would wait for the main character to come back, obviously.

Which ties into how there was a general struggle to separate 'what makes sense for the narrative' and 'what makes sense for the characters,' so they really blatantly said and did things a lot simply because That Was The Story, which is in my opinion much less annoying when it's schlocky cheap fun hero times than when it's trying so hard to be deep.

This is a failure state Batman falls into a lot these days but King pushed it, and the further into the weeds he got with his grandiose story plan the worse it got.

The use of Flashpoint Batman Thomas Wayne and the frankly insane 'quest to dump Flashpoint Joker's corpse in a Lazarus Pit because she's mom' storyline was an exercise in not earning a single emotional beat but beating that dead bag of bones with a mallet. Flashpoint Batman and Bane as joint villains wound up very much not giving each other space to breathe, and King was not good at showing how or why they did anything.

There was this bizarre phenomenon where nothing would seem to happen for entire issues and yet you'd turn around and A Lot Happened without being developed in any way because there wasn't the space.

Part of the bad pacing, I'll give, that made it really fall apart in the home stretch was King got his total number of issues cut partway through, so a lot of sense and payoff he'd intended no doubt fell through the cracks. But the buildup was already annoying and badly organized from a 'serialized comics should consist of readable issues' standpoint. He was retreading the original Knightfall a lot and I don't think he made good choices with how.

(Also he was taking inspiration from the Dark Knight Nolan movie series including bits I never liked to begin with lmao so there's that.)

Fundamentally, I think the big problem was that, in seeking to impose his very specific emotional journey narrative on a character with a whole lot of Stuff already going on, and not being willing (or able idk) to put in the work to make those things compatible, King kind of...derealized Batman.

Which is an achievement, considering Batman isn't real! But the weird floaty in-your-head wanky literary bro effect that worked so well in the contained yet infinitely flexible space of his Vision or Mister Miracle run told against him in this context.

People have done this kind of derealized story with Batman before actually and it went over pretty well, because they didn't take over a hundred issues of the main title to do it and insist the whole time that it was Very Real and would Fundamentally Change Batman Forever, which no one wanted to begin with and it didn't anyway.

Since you find his overall style readable it's probably fine, at least until the story starts to really fall apart from being rushed? When he's not trying too hard to be cute he can write a patter scene and certain kinds of drama quite well, and the art was often much better than the scripts.

King mostly just prioritizes form over substance, but in a pretentious auteur way rather than in the goofy fun way suitable to the medium, and didn't really manage to deliver anything unique or enlivening in return, so a lot of readers felt increasingly cheated and jerked-around as things went on. Which among other things made it hard for him to recover narratively, or in public goodwill, from the batcat twist that everyone saw coming but he tried to convince us wouldn't happen right until it did, because the emotional state of 'story not living up to its self-hype' persisted.

So that's me on that. It's probably much less annoying in trade form, when there's less time for anticipation to build and you know basically how it's going to turn out, but only you know if it's worth it to you! :D

#ask #comics #hope this helps #a nonny mouse #batman #i throw salt #upon request!#hoc est meum #the best bits of Bane running gotham were #the shock effect moment of Detective Joker getting out of his cop car #and when the harley quinn comic acknowledged this was ongoing during an issue #where everyone was naked #both of these are gags #because it didn't really get the work put in #to be satisfying on a drama level #also on reflection king has this pattern #of making things arbitrarily worse to create higher stakes #and then not delivering on the tension created thereby and just leaving things worse #having used the desire to see things get better than he's made them as a hook #which is not unique to him but he overuses it and gets awkwardly intense about it #so a move that looks artistic the first time just becomes being unreliable and depressing in a prolonged relationship #writing for superhero comics is really hard!

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missputotyra · 3 years

Text

Monster boy Encyclopedia- MDZS- Gusu Lan 1

“Welcome to Gusu Lan I assure you there is nothing wrong , I just don’t think humans and non-monsters can handle what the Cloud Recesses has become all at one .Please take this Stone and experience our true home at your lesiure . - Lan Xichen , Current leader of Gusu Lan.

- So Gusu Lan’s main base The cloud recesses is an Eldricht Demon realm . Which is why Xichen has filter over it for someone who is a good Cultivator like him it’s pretty easy to look at Gusu Lan in its full warped Eldricht Beauty with out going insane .

- They have a lot of Harpys and Were rabbits around the

- this dose Bring Concerns about about Sizhui the only human there who sees the true Cloud Rescesses everyday and is still sane . There are. Many theories that people have which includes Him actaully having a personal Filter , him being adopted at an age were he could adapt to it and the most ridiculous being Sizhui being a higher Eldricht Being hiding using Sizhui’s body as a way To manifest itself.

- Kamen Riders , Lilim and Patron Librarian also seem to be able to by pass the Filters on Cloud Recesses and not go insane.

- the Realm is described as A visual depiction of Music the Fauna is often as Living Lyrics, notes that’s Fly ,walk like normal creatures and the Scales move like snakes across the Sky and thier are constant beautiful mesmerizing voices singing the music of Gusu Lan

- but inside there a grating dissonance takes over the Mind of those unprepare for Gusu Lans True beauty. You’ll want to stay there forever and Turn into one of them an You’ll become a Slug , a Shoggoth , An Eldricht priest Or Very rarely a Mindflayer

- Shoggoth and mindflayer seemingly lose thier natural Pigment and turn white and Blue when joining the Sect. Shoggoth also lost thier Butler like devotion for a more familial devotion

- Though many of these Shoggoth were abandoned by thier masters to dry out on the mountain and thus felt betrayed

” what about these Slugs . Well the Slugs were originally Human members of Gusu Lan.”

Xichen seemed to change hes serene Tone for a more Melancholy one looking at one spefic Slug person with two Juniors one was a Slug like Him and other completely human . The Slug Junior seemed to have done something wrong as he was being pulled the older slug .

“Who was that you asked ? Hes my Younger brother Wangji…. I mean Lan Zhan .Wangji is a courtesy name.”

- Wen wanted to Assert Dominance . Basically in an Archery match the sects have every year in Wen sect no body from Wen sect came in the top 4 Lan Wangji came in 4th despite throwing the competion halfway ,He's brother Xichen came in second ,Jin Zixaun was third and in first was JC's Adopted Brother Wei Wuxian . This made Wen worry

- The first thing that Wen did was attack the cloud recesses of Gusu Lan .However Wen didn't just stop at forcing them to burn the place down not they did something worse after they had burned the Cloud recesses they then release a Large amount of Parasitic Slugs on the poor sect and since thier Home was burned they had no where to go , since Wangji 's Leg was broken and everyone left to run Wangji was infected more severely than most of the sect .

- However Lan sect was Surprisingly resistance. to Changes these Parasitic were making to thier bodies and Lasted a long while until Xichen came back with allies .Where Qiren inform him of the state Gusu Lan was in , If the slugs weren't removed they'd all sex addicted feral frankly ugly eldritch Slug creatures known as Deformers and says some have already transformed and left the sect in search of what ever unfortunate partner they can get thier hands on.

- Luckily, the Order of the Chief god heard the Plight of the sects fighting against Wen's sect and thier healer/doctors could help them . Not really ...the order of the chief god are kinda horrible people when it comes to monsters including the Chief god himself and When Xichen asks for help removing parasitic monsterizating slugs from members of his sect most healers/ Doctors from the order turned him down saying Gusu Lan was a lost cause and Xichen couldn't get help from healer's or doctors from the area even with help of Jin Guangyao and Nie Mingjue asking around when they weren't fighting no one would take the Job as it would require a skilled surgeon and Gusu Lan's resitiance to the change was dwiddling .

- Xichen started to notice that his own brother would sometimes attack him in a brief feral Lust fuel rages before snapping out it as if Wangji couldn't discern Xichen as his brother .

- Xichen was getting desperate he didn't want anymore of his Sect to become these feral minded sex fuel Monsters that barely any remembered who they were. Even if they did win the Sunshot campaign , Wen would still have the last laugh .Xichen even consider infecting himself with the slugs so that he'd aleast be able suffer with his sect in thier final moments of being human and being capable of having rational thought .Even though Jin Guangyao and Mingjue protested him doing this they both knew thier was no point Xichen was going to go down with his ship . “That was until a strange man who was eating cake at the other table put down his fork he seemed to have be from Zipangu“ Xichen countined his Story ”however Mingjue got more defensive when he saw the strange belt around his waist the man was a Masked Rider one the orders many Hero's several of whom help us out in the fights against Wen. “

- However this rider stated that he meant no harm as he hand over heard Xichen's plight about the parasitic slugs and give the men the hard truth ,The order doesn't operate on people with these Parasitic slugs inside them because Removing doesn't prevent people from becoming monsters.But it dose save thier ability to think rationally though they become an entirely different monster from a deformer .

- The rider then said He'd offer to help as he's known through the order as being a Master surgeon able operate on any organ. Xichen accepted his offer with tears of joy and hope it wasn't to late to save his brother and Uncle .

The Rider called his two female assistances over and told them they were headed to Gusu lan's Section of the battle field and then to the cloud recesses itself

- The Cloud Recesses now regard this rider and his assistances as a hero who selflessly put themselves on a the order's chopping block as they resisted the order commands not to help them .

” The Rider told me to call him Brave as to not give The order any reason to attack Gusu Lan .” Xichen snapped out his Reminescening when you ask a question “ What are the Slug people called now well Beforers .”

Beforers

- Beforers and Deformer are a Type of Eldricht Slug monster That was an Idea that me and a friend came up with during her Recent Star Wars obsession . I expanded upon Cloud Recesses and Beforers After taking a look at Junji Itos Uzamaki you know the story where people turn into snails and spirals .

. - yes Gusu Lan being Eldricht beings is inspired by the Eldritch Lan Au I personally found it on@angstymdzsthoughts

- Anyways beforer just like Other Eldritch monsters are Weird . Beforers and Deformers are classified as Tritionia subspecies as they look like Sea slug though thier body structure mimic The struture of blue Dragon sea slugs( though they often are seen with legs ) they can have the Look of anything kind of sea slug.

- Deformers come from a Parasite . Deformers are basically Feral Eldritch beasts that basically Attack anyone the see as a potenial Vessels For the slug parasites and Taking them out is A basically only one way to become a Beforer as previous Said Gusu Lans Music can also cause humans to become beforer .

- So Beforer don’t manifest Genitals until they take partners. but they do Birth Asexually little slug creatures That eventually turning into Beforers basically cloning themselves

-Yes Beforers are Hermaphrodites like Normal slugs .

- They a look plumper and Gain Long tentacles like appendage that grow from their lower back that seem to have mind of its own after Taking a partner.

-yes The Tentacles are infact Their Partners dont worry they can change back at will . They do the weird Transformation thing all eldritch monster do.

—-

“ What Am I ? ” Xichen looked in confusing “ I’m A Kind of Subspecies of the Dark Priest , I guess you could say I’m an Eldritch Priest.

“ A few month Of living in this Realm I start having dreams I was in the water in the deepest Depths of the ocean and a voice saying that I should Join my people and teach them of the Great old ones. ”

Eldritch priest

- a Subspecies of the Dark Priest Who are more connected to the the Great Old one .

-They are more Cultish in behavior than the Dark priest of the Fallen god.

- usually keep doing thier Jobs of recruting people into the great church of Cthulhu even after obtain partners.

- What Eldritch priest transform thier Partner into is Entirely thier Choice Among the Eldritch Monsters .

You notice the strange almost Mint green colored cloak or was it a pale Yellow it was twice as Large as Xichen and it was really dark inside but , Did you see two scary looking yet familar Faces in that cloak . Your suspicions were confirmed by a hand Coming out and stroking Xichens Face it’s had Yellow sleeves so they had to be from Jin .

——-—

Notable individuals In Gusu Lan

Name: Lan Xichen

Species : Eldritch Priest

Notes: He’s smiles all the time and it’s kind of unsettling . Their are often Golden and/or Green Masses attached to Xichen so hes Most likely Taken .

Favorite color: …White I’ll describe it as white

Favorite Types: Caring and tender people

Status: Taken?

-———-

Name: Lan Qiren

Species : Beforer

Notes: He’s Apparently Lan Xichen and Lan Zhans Uncel

Alot people like the “Moustache”

looks more like Chromodoris willani

Favorite color: Navy Blur

Favorite Type: …he hasn’t really thought about that I guess Mature and Gentel

Status : Singel

————-—

Name: Lan Zhan

Species : Beforer

Notes:

He looks so Sad

he Hates the Leader of Yunmeng Jiang with hidden burning Passion and Lan Zhan wrote down he wished that “ The Leader of Yumeng Jiang be put to sleep like the dirty mutt he is.”

Lan Zhan also wonders why BoJian( MDZS oc) is Even friends with Yunmeng Jiang‘s Leader

Likes rabbits

looks like Glaucus Aka Blue Dragon sea slug

Favorite color: Red

Favorite Type: he Drew a picture that looked similar to current Yiling sect leader if he was human . When we mentioned this he immediately tagged along with us to Yiling .

————-—

Name: Lan Jingyi

Species : Beforer

Notes: He was Born a Beforer it’s believed he split from Lan Zhan

We thought He and Sizhui were twins but they arent

sweet kid ,Huge mouth ,forgetful

Looks like Chromodoris elisabethina

Favorite color: Blue

Favorite Type: I don’t know someone like Jin Ling !?

Stautus : I’m not ready to marry yet !! ;-;

———-—

Name:Lan Sizhui

Species : Hes Human

Notes: The only Human Gusu Lan

Lan Zhan says he came from Wen

As Said before This is Strange because He’s only a Junior and hasnt Gone insane for Gusu Lans Beauty

Favorite color: Periwinkle

Favorite Type: I have no idea I guess I follow Jingyi and Say someone like Jin Ling

status: Not ready

#eldritch #eldritch!lan #mo dao zu shi #mdzs #mo dao zhu shi #lan xichen #gusu lan #lan sizhui #lan zhan #lan wangji #kamen rider #kamen rider ex aid #monster boy #monster girl encyclopedia #alternative universe #crossover au #crossover

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thatanonwiththeoc · 4 years

Text

The Taste of Coffee Ch. 2

A Lukagami fic. Read on AO3

Part 1

woah where’d this sudden jump in writing quality come from??

quick thank you to two people before the fic begins!

@15megapixels-mlb who inspired me to kickstart this project by feeding some quality lukagami as well as recc’ing it to their followes

and @hermionemonica who also helped write an amazing marichat fic called Cause I knew I was in love with you (when we sat in silence). highly recommend it for the fluff and hurt/comfort lovers

Onto the fic fhaskjlfhas

“Kagami…”

Kagami looked up from the guitar in her hands.

“I’m not saying you’re not capable-”

She looked Luka straight in the eye. “I’m going to get it, I swear. Just watch me”

“Of course you will.” He smiled. That idiotic handsome smile. “I don’t doubt you, not for one second.”

Although it would’ve sounded sarcastic coming from anyone else, Luka was nothing if not sincere in his words. He shifted in the couch to face her better, though the guitar on his lap didn’t exactly do them any favors. The couch was already cramped as is.

“I’m just saying that I think this piece is proving to be a little… out there. At least, for now.”

Kagami quirked her brow. “What do you mean?”

He paused, looking away to consider his words. It was at least somewhat comforting to know he was being careful in what he said. But another nagging part of her begged to know what was going on in his mind. But like all other impolite impulses, she quelled it. Being rude wouldn’t prove very useful at the moment.

“I just think you’re struggling a bit is all.”

Kagami shot him an unimpressed look. “The struggle is what makes the end result worth it.”

“Of course it does.” Luka nodded in agreement. “But there’s also the fact that you’re gonna drive yourself insane trying to push yourself this hard.”

She should’ve figured that he’d say something like that. Of course, pushing herself was what she was good at. The outside of her comfort zone was her comfort zone. It was one of the things that made her the person she was today. Perseverance and determination were her pillars, and she’d be damned if those ever fell. It was frankly, sort of surprising that he hadn’t picked up on that yet. Wasn’t he supposed to be the type to be able to read people?

Their lessons had been going on for a few weeks now, and she could’ve sworn she was making good progress. She’d learned a fair bit in the past month and a half. Not to mention that Luka’s constant encouragement and commendation only fuelled her desire to keep going; keep pushing herself and see how far she could go.

Kagami tilted her head. “What do you suggest, then?”

Looking back up to meet his eyes, she brought both hands to rest on the hunk of wood on her lap. Darn thing.

“We’re going to learn another song.” Luka said.

“Another one?” She questioned.

“Yes, another one.” He readied his hands into a playing position. “Here, you remember this chord, right?” He fretted a chord with practiced ease and strummed. The sound rang out as clear as day, shimmering in the air.

She followed to do the same. “Right, of course.” Kagami tried to follow, trying to mimic the posture down to the angle of his hand as well as the curl of the fingers. She had to adjust the way her fingers pressed down on the strings a few times and she hated how long it took for it to feel comfortable enough. No matter how hard she tried, it just felt weird and unnatural. Her fingers never really moved in the way she wanted it to. Instead, it seemed as if they chose to get in the way. Bringing her right wrist up, she tried to attack the strings in the same way Luka did.

Keyword: ‘tried’. A dissonant buzz came out of her guitar. It was nasty and grating. Kagami had to resist the urge to cringe at her own incompetence. How was she going to expect to learn if she couldn’t even play a single chord?

Was Luka giggling?!

Kagami glared. “Is something funny?”

“No, no.” He waved a hand in front of him, looking down while his laughter subsided. “You’re so tense, Kagami! Loosen up a bit!” As if to illustrate his point he rolled his shoulders and looked at her expectantly. Kagami did the same, trying to will the tension in her shoulders to run back to whatever pathetic hole they crawled out of.

She took a deep breath and loosened herself. She could do this.

Kagami raised her wrist once again.

And strummed.

This time, what came out of the guitar was something she could actually call half-decent. It wasn’t as smooth or as clean as she heard Luka did, but it was a start. And a start was where many adventures began. Only this time, she wasn’t alone in taking it.

“Great!” Luka praised. He began strumming up and down to a moderate tempo. He nodded and smiled, signalling for her to do the same. Simple, she could do that. Kagami copied the way his arm went up and down, striking the strings with just enough force so it would be heard yet still sound somewhat musical. Her playing was nowhere near as polished as his was, but it was something.

“And then play D!” He called, shifting onto another chord. Kagami felt a quick rush of panic before she was able to follow. After fumbling with her fingers for what felt like an eternity (seriously, how was he able to transition that quickly?), she finally got the shape down and pressed into the neck with enough force to make the strings play again. A messy mistake, but nothing a little hard work couldn’t fix.

Looking away from her hands and towards Luka, she saw that he looked like he was having the time of his life. His head was rocking from side to side to the rhythm of the music while he boasted the widest grin on his face. His eyes were closed, like he was losing himself in the music, and that was what he lived for. The boy’s stupid ignorance was so contagious she couldn’t help but smile as her shoulders felt a little lighter. He was definitely cute, she’d admit that much. Marinette wasn’t just teasing, after all.

She hastily ignored the butterflies in her stomach.

He’d only come out of his haze to call the next chord. They kept going like that, switching between the two chords. It was relatively easy compared to the piece she was trying to learn before, so she had him to thank for that. It wasn’t long before she was able to anticipate when the next change would come, and she was able to settle into a flow. Even stiffly bobbing her head to the rhythm along with him.

But Luka surprised her.

He started singing.

Kagami didn’t recognize the lyrics. Or song, for that matter. She was much too entranced by how joyous he was, sharing his passion with someone else. As he sang, he added the occasional embellishment to the chords he was playing, complimenting her own playing like the colors on a blank canvas. Maybe that was what he thought of when he played music.

Art in its most raw, visceral form.

Beautiful.

And maybe, just by the tiniest bit, Kagami wanted to find herself lost in that little world of his too.

It was strangely intimate, being able to join him when he was in that state, but he didn’t seem to mind. None of her research ever prepared her for ‘What To Do When Playing Music With Your Friend.”. But strangely, she felt calm. A delightful feeling of belonging settled within Kagami, and she wanted it to stay there. And the smile one her face felt too good to pass up.

Eventually, the song came to a close when Luka finished the song with a concluding strum, loud enough that it made her flinch. She hadn’t even noticed she was staring until he looked back at her, and she immediately felt her stomach drop. How could she let herself get carried away like that? And more importantly, how were his strings still intact after that brutal attack?

All questions were immediately discarded however when Luka laughed and held out his hand. Yes! Another high-five!

Kagami smacked it with what she hoped would convey her enthusiasm. A smile (a natural one, she hoped) was still on her face after being able to ‘jam’ with him. She hadn’t known that playing music would be this fun. But he just kept surprising her.

“You did awesome! I’m really impressed!” Luka still seemed on a high from his playing. And if Kagami was completely honest with herself, so was she. She wasn’t aware of that peak until she came crawling down from it.

“Thank you.” When she removed her fingers from the strings, she felt a stinging pain surge through them. She hissed as she rubbed the sore fingertips. When did that get there?

She heard Luka’s voice from beside her. “You alright, Kagami?”

“I’m fine.” If he was alright, then she was too. She only wished she knew that playing guitar would mean her fingers would hurt every time. It was very much enjoyable to her, but Kagami couldn’t help but wonder how Luka was able to play that much without showing any signs of discomfort whatsoever. He must’ve gotten used to the pain. That was the only explanation she could think of.

Luka leaned in closer, concerned. “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

It was then that Luka realized she was massaging her fingertips idly. His eyes flew open and a knowing smile found its way onto her face. Ah, this was the part where he was going to start looking down on her for being fresh meat, wasn’t it?. She’d already gone through this with fencing, and she wasn’t looking forward to doing this again-

“Don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal.” Luka assured, and put the guitar back behind the couch. Kagami had already discarded the instrument, as it lay on the floor to the side.

Kagami winced. “How do you deal with the pain?”

“Oh, simple. I don’t.” He winked.

Her brow furrowed. “What?” At her confusion, he snickered. She was glad he was finding her predicament amusing.

“After you play enough, you get callus on your fingers. See?” He held out his left hand in front of him.

She wasn’t even aware of how close he was to her until that exact moment. His knee was brushing up against hers, and he didn’t seem to notice that his face was now only a few centimetres away from hers. Close enough that she could smell his scent. Not wanting to lose the moment, she chose not to mention it. The close proximity was warm; welcoming. And she didn’t want to ruin that. She had to admit, it was pretty nice.

Kagami brought out her hand to slightly graze the tips of his fingers. Sure enough, the skin there was tough; rough to the touch yet still gentle in the way he touched her own hand. Kagami wondered how long it would take until her own hands would be like that. Without thinking, she gently gripped his wrist with her other hand, absentmindedly rubbing the skin there.

She ran a thumb across the tips of his fingers, trying to get a better feel for him. It was like little tingles of electricity rushed through her fingers and up her arm, escaping through her spine, because she had to resist the urge to shiver. Nonetheless, the heat in her cheeks was there. Almost warm enough that he may have felt it too.

When she looked up and met his bright blue eyes, the intimacy of what they were doing sank in.

Oh.

The two quickly shuffled away, and the warmth in her cheeks suddenly exploded into a full-throttle assault.

Kagami shifted in her seat, clenching her hands in her lap a little harder than was necessary. She tried to fix her composure, but her muscles refused to cooperate with her brain, the useless things. What good was a body if it didn’t even do what she wanted it to?

She hastily looked away, her gaze tilting in the opposite direction, unable to look at the person whose space she was in just 5 seconds ago. She tried not to think about his breath on her skin, the way his hand felt in hers, the smell of him being so close to her…

There had to be some way to salvage the conversation.

Without thinking, she spoke up before the silence would settle around them.

“Are you doing okay?” Kagami whispered.

She heard him shift beside her. “Sorry, what?”

“After what happened with Marinette.”

Kagami wanted to hit herself. That was extremely untactful. The wound was likely too fresh and tender and didn’t need any further prodding. Who was she to ask about his love life? She knew as much as the next person that Luka used to have strong feelings for the girl. Feelings that only proved to be unreciprocated.

She knew how much that had to hurt.

Still, she made a mistake, and she was determined to face the consequences of it.

When she summoned all of her inner courage, she looked up at Luka. He wore a sad smile on his face. Somewhere in her heart, she wanted to reach out in empathy for the boy.

“Marinette, huh?” Luka breathed.

Luka’s gaze fell to the opposite side of the room where their band used to rehearse. Kagami remembered a moment where Luka would hold down the chords of his guitar with his left hand while Marinette would strum it with her right.

“It’s… going alright, I guess.”

“You guess?” Kagami quirked a brow. He wasn’t usually this vague.

Luka shook his head, as if coming out of a daydream. “I always knew her heart belonged to Adrien. It was obvious from the moment I met her. Her heart was his, and it always was.” He let out a half-laugh that was more like an ironic acceptance; an admittal to defeat.

“Why did you even try, then?” She asked. It was rash, she knew. But she needed to know. Why did he even bother when the end result was clear?

Especially when it would only end in hurt?

He rubbed the back of his neck. “Maybe a little part of me hoped I could change her mind. That I could try and find a way into her heart and become the person she always wanted.” He hunched forward to rest his elbows on his thighs. His eyes were downcast. A severe contrast to their usual serene aura. “For once, I found something worth fighting for. Something, or someone that gave me an opportunity to try and do for myself. I tried, Kagami. And I- I knew she didn’t love me as much but I thought that, as long as I loved her, it would be fine, right?”

Kagami could only stare in silent shock as he ran a hand through his messy hair. Luka stared at the ceiling and sighed.

“I guess it doesn’t even matter now, huh?” His lips curled into a smile that nowhere near reached his eyes. “The heart just wants what it wants.”

Luka looked back at her, and Kagami dared peek into the soul behind his eyes. Underneath the calm exterior, and beneath the gentle smile, she could see it. She could see the boy inside and the inner working of his being.

He was hurting.

It’d been at least three months since Kagami ended things with Adrien. And she could proudly say that she’d been able to move on from whatever that was. It was something, but she wouldn’t be able to call it a relationship. The feelings she had for him were real, she was sure. But life, like a river, kept ebbing and flowing. And all Kagami could do in the face of unexpected events was to adapt and make the most of her time. After a few nights silently crying herself to sleep, she was thankful enough to whatever powers that be that she could calm her grieving heart and see the full picture. After all, she was still a teenage girl who had a full life ahead of her. Full of new opportunities that were ripe for the taking. There was so much more to her that was worth more than something as trivial as a crush.

But looking back at Luka was more than enough evidence to know that wasn’t the case for him.

In his eyes, she could see the hurt that remained from yearning after something that he couldn’t have. That pain was still there, and was still throbbing, pulsating through his being. The room was silent, but Kagami was sure she could hear the unsung songs that played in his head. The haunting melodies he’d crafted, trying and trying and trying.

It wasn’t a feeling of him trying to win her back, no. This was beyond that. It was obvious to Kagami that he’d long moved past her. Rather, this was the after-effects of someone who’d spent so long pining after someone, trying to give himself only for it to get it given back. In the after effects of a storm, there was always a haze. A numb limbo of sorts, where there was no clear onslaught of thunder and rain, but also no sunshine to be let in. That was what Kagami was thinking of when she gazed into the eyes of the boy before her. He looked at her with a desperate plea, begging to be answered.

Kagami had always known Luka to be held-together, more emotionally mature than most of the people she knew. Much similar to herself. She had the impression that he was patient, warm, willing to listen and always, always there for those who needed him. She admired that much about her friend.

Friend.

He was her friend.

And if Luka was her friend, then Kagami had an obligation to remedy his pain. She may not be as experienced, but she sure as hell was going to try.

Kagami took his hand.

“You deserve more than that.”

“It’s fine.” He shook his head. “I’ve already moved on, anyway.”

“No!” Kagami gripped his hand tighter. He wasn’t getting her point, and she was going to make him listen.

“This isn’t about Marinette anymore. It’s about you.” Kagami subconsciously leaned in close to him. It felt like his gravity was pulling her to him. And for once, she didn’t want an explanation why. “The fact that you were willing to fight for something like that is very commendable. It really is. But it’s not fair to try and settle. There is no ‘compromising’ when it comes to trying to find someone to love.”

“You deserve more than that, Luka.” Kagami said as she held their hands up between them.

She squeezed softly.

“We all do.”

Luka’s gaze fell from her towards their hands. For good measure, she ran a thumb across the skin there. When he looked back up at her, she tried not to shift as his mouth was left half-open, as if trying to come up with a response. The sight of him looking so surprised at her words made Kagami realize something that felt like ice water being poured down her jacket.

Because for the first time in forever, Kagami didn’t know what to do.

And that terrified her.

This was too intimate, she was only trying to offer some advice, try and make things better. This wasn’t meant to be anything more than a friend comforting another friend. She hadn’t meant to look into his eyes and hold his hand in her own. The escalating situation was already derailing, her world was already starting to rumble. She wouldn’t be surprised if all of a sudden she started vomiting-

“Thank you.” Luka said, interrupting her spiral. “I… really needed that.”

And then he smiled.

Really, really smiled.

When he squeezed her hand back, Kagami tried to stifle the noise that threatened to spill out of her. It didn’t work as well as she hoped, though. It came out as more of a silenced, high-pitched whine that she could only pray he didn’t hear. If he did, he didn’t mention it. She peeked into his eyes once again, eyes that were slightly squinted from the genuine, genuine smile that was being sent her way. Her way. He was smiling for her.

And then something in Kagami finally clicked.

All the times he lit a warmth in her cheeks, all of the times he listened to her about how her week went, all of the praise he gave her during his lessons, both on the guitar and on her other passions came crashing at her at full force. She wasn’t oblivious, she knew very much how she felt at any given moment. And unlike others, she didn’t try and deny herself her feelings. There was no point to it.

There wasn’t a sure way to find out how it happened, the minute, the hour, or the exact date, but in an unexpected turn of events…

Kagami had somehow, somehow caught feelings for him.

She looked deeper into his eyes. The silence between them was crashing and deafening all at once. Luka was thinking so loud she could practically hear his thoughts. His still eyes were moving at lightspeed, like his inner self scrambling for any words to say. The novelty of her realization made her breathing slightly quicken, and she could feel the lightest traces of sweat covering in the crevices of her palm.

In the time she’d gotten to know Luka, he’d been nothing but sweet to her. He’d become one of her first friends outside of her mother’s circle. Not only that, but one of her truest and closest in what little time they were able to spend together. Even though they came from different walks of life, they found that they had much more in common than they both expected. She’d learned to be more comfortable around him than anyone else. Not just because of his handsome smile (though, that wasn’t too bad), but also because he was always patient, and ready to listen to her. Even offering some surprising advice every now and then. He’d even enabled her at times to bad mouth her mother where it was due. An accomplishment she’d never thought of doing in a thousand lifetimes.

To top it all off, their lessons together slowly evolved into something less of a formality and more of an excuse to spend their time together. As friends.

Kagami didn’t know many people. It was a sad fact that she knew was a part of her life no matter how much she tried to push it. But she also knew that what she shared with Luka was special. It was something that she cherished and grew attached to without even noticing. Even the little things meant more to her than he’d ever realize. The drinks he’d make while she was over, the tunes he would silently hum to himself when he thought she wouldn’t hear him, the feel of his arms wrapped around her small form when they went for their usual goodbye hug. She seldom found the opportunity to tell him, but those sweet embraces were always a favorite part of her visits.

She wanted that. She wanted all of it.

All of it and more.

One time, they’d taken a break from their lesson to learn how to make a meal he saw online. Neither of them had tried it before, but he suggested that they’d do a better job together than he would by himself.

In all but fifteen minutes, everything went wrong.

But even days later, Kagami looked back fondly at the time they laughed both with and at each other at the ungodly stains that ruined their clothes.

Never, never before had anything been given to her like the boy in front of her.

Luka Couffaine.

Everything made sense now.

And judging by the way Luka was so earnestly looking at her now, it all came to him too.

Kagami steeled herself.

There was only one more thing to do.

Luka swallowed.

“Kagami, I-”

He was cut off by Kagami reaching her hands around his face to pull his lips against hers.

The feeling of having Luka’s gentle lips soft upon her own would never leave Kagami’s memory. It was like the gentle whispers of the forest were caressing her face, and lovingly whispered their songs into her ear and immersed her into a new world. An undiscovered path that she wasn’t aware was there until now. Each subtle movement of his lips upon hers dared make her head spin. This was new to her, yet she was thriving in it. The eruptions in her system were only elevated when Luka responded in kind, deepening their kiss as he lightly held his chin between his thumb and forefinger.

Kagami didn’t even know that this was something she wanted until only a few moments ago. But now that she’d tried it, she couldn’t find it in herself to stop. At least, not when the low hum he emitted under her touch sent a welcome vibration through her entire being.

Even through closed eyes, she could sense the way he was melting under her touch. Kagami could hear the sound of him over the roaring flames in her ears. And a heady sense of power coursed through her at the thought. Kagami ran her hands through the locks of his hair, making sure to memorise each centimetre like a sailor navigated the sea. To make a mental map of the new uncharted territory before her. It was only intensified when they shifted their position so he leaned back, making room for her to straddle his lap.

From the new angle, she was able to gain more leverage and hold his head tight after wrapping her arms around the back of his head. She’d never actually kissed anyone, but how could anything be wrong when his arms were holding her flush against him like that?

And if a soft giggle erupted from her, then who was she to care?

She knew she could always be herself around him.

Luka already knew her that way.

It was a wonder to Kagami how she hadn’t realized her feelings earlier. Looking back to all of the times they’d brushed hands, smiled at each other, talked about nothing and everything all at once. Everything, one way or another made her feel something that was both new and old. Different and familiar. So, so wrong in all of the best, most lovable and amazing ways. Luka was someone that she didn’t want to let go of.

Kagami did believe in fate, and that the universe had a plan for her. Somewhere, at least.

But she also believed in choice; seizing the moments as they come.

And she chose him.

It would always be him.

When they eventually broke apart after what could’ve been forever, they found themselves gasping for breath she didn’t even know she needed. It was like he was oxygen, and she was drowning. A bit dramatic, she was well aware, but there was really no other way to describe how much she realized she needed him at that exact moment. The only sound in the room was their deep breathing, and the scent of him filled her senses. If she had the chance, she’d fall for him all over again. The new, thrilling feeling that was both terrifyingly exciting and new in the most exhilarating ways.

Kagami couldn’t wait to see where this new path would lead.

One look at him was all it took to send her steady heart racing. His hair was a ruffled mess in her hands, looking all but thoroughly loved and tussled. It was a sight that Kagami would never get sick of. Of Luka looking right and thoroughly kissed to perfection.

She looked into his eyes. They looked more blue than they’d ever been. Now that they were even closer, the waters of him were even clearer now. She saw a thriving ecosystem with sea life, plants, storms followed by calming waters, the twinkling slivers of a sunset behind a high mountain in the distance before it gave way for a beautiful serene nighttime that would take the breath away of even the most stoic of souls.

In all of those poetic details, she saw him in each and every one of them.

It was him.

They were him.

Him.

And he spoke.

“You kissed me.” He said.

After coming down from her high, Kagami responded in kind.

“I did.”

“May I confess something?” He asked, and Kagami gently nodded, their foreheads brushing gently against one another at the movement. “That was kind of my first kiss.”

Kagami blanched. “Kind of your first-” She gaped. “You mean, you hadn’t kissed anyone else before this?”

“Mm-mm.” He shook his head.

“Oh…” She said. And ‘oh’ was right. How else was she supposed to feel when she found out that she was this boy’s first kiss?

“It was mine too.” Kagami admitted.

They never broke eye contact as she scoured his gaze. His irises were still, yet teeming with life and energy. His mouth broke out into a large boyish grin that Kagami was rarely able to see on him. It lit a joyful fire within her, and she wondered how else she’d be able to make him smile like that. She liked a good challenge, after all.

It came again when he asked her a request that she’d never forget in a millenia.

“Could you do that again?”

Kagami couldn’t help the smile that crawled its way onto her face.

“Do what?” She teased, licking her lips.

Luka breathed a laugh that was full of both humour and disbelief. She couldn’t help but smile just as wide as he did.

“You know what I mean.” He said.

Kagami decided that she’d teased him enough.

She cradled the side of his face in her hand, and he leaned into the touch. When her other hand came to rest on his shoulder, he removed his own from her waist to rest it atop hers. And Kagami was sure that no matter how many times that they’d do this, it would always, always be just as amazing as the first. The fire inside her was a candle, but it’d forever be burning for them.

Both of them.

Her lips met his in another chaste kiss. Gentle and promising in a colorful, pleasant way that filled her with warmth. This time, she was softer. Kagami wanted to relish every single detail of their kiss. It was her proper first kiss, after all. And what better person to share it with than her closest friend?

Friend. Kagami thought.

Maybe that word wouldn’t be appropriate for what they were now.

But labels or no, what they had was something. A beautiful something that could be pried out of her cold, dead hands.

Luka shifted underneath her, running slow circles behind her back with his hand while he squeezed her hand with his other. He kissed her back with enough tenderness to make her heart sing. It must’ve been a natural talent of his to drive her insane, she figured. But she certainly wasn’t complaining when she heard him emit a happy low hum from the back of his throat.

Absolutely not.

They were pulled out of their own reality when they heard a low, feminine voice from the doorway. It had a smug lilt to it that implied it was more teasing than harsh.

“Jeez, I didn’t know you had a type.” It muttered.

Luka and Kagami whipped their heads around so hard that she was surprised she hadn’t given herself a severe case of whiplash. If she wasn’t already dizzy off of Luka, that is.

Juleka stared at them, a small knowing smile on her face as she leaned against the door frame, arms crossed. Kagami felt Luka clutch her hand tighter. She couldn’t see through the girl’s bangs, but Kagami would’ve sworn that she had raised a cheeky brow at their… compromising position.

“Hey, Jules.” Luka drawled out awkwardly. Kagami wasn’t sure how much more embarrassment she could handle. “You’ve uh, met Kagami, right?”

“Uh-huh.” Juleka said.

Luka groaned.

“I can explain.”

(He couldn’t)

#miraculous #miraculous ladybug #lukagami #anon's writing #the taste of coffee

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