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jdrizzle15 · 3 years

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Her Second Return

Just like all of you, and especially my fellow Penny fans, I am absolutely devastated by the Volume 8 finale. I had been in quite a state these last few days, utterly heartbroken, and actually nauseous at times. It feels strange to me to be legitimately grieving a fictional character, but it’s not a bad thing to feel this way. To me, this just shows that CRWBY loves her just as much as us to have written her so well that we connect so completely with her, that it feels like we lost an actual piece of ourselves when she’s gone.

But as you can probably tell by the title, this mega post isn’t gonna be about accepting this end, not in the slightest! Today I want to share canon evidence that can point towards another return of our beloved quirky red headed cinnamon bun! I’m here to spread this hope that I and others in the Nuts & Dolts dolts Discord server have!

I have this separated into many different sections to keep these thoughts organized. With that said, here goes…

A Father’s Words:

In Episode 7 of Volume 7, ‘Worst Case Scenario’ we learn the origins of Penny’s aura, and thus her soul. We also learn that it takes more aura each time she’s brought back. This leaves open an option that could be used at a later point.

Many people theorized that Pietro could indeed revive Penny one more time, which he would absolutely do. But there also lies the possibility that someone else could donate some of theirs, I’m not sure about this as I feel like it’s akin to blood donation where compatibility matters or there's a high risk of altering her, but the possibility is definitely there.

Now, the conversation in Chapter 5 of Volume 8, ‘Amity’ that Pietro and Penny have is an important moment for both Father and Daughter. It was there to show how her death in PvP all that time ago really did have a heavy impact on him and is still affecting him to this day.

Instead of continuing to pretend that everything is A-okay, like he had done for most of Volume 7, he finally lets his true feelings about how it come out to Penny for what is quite likely the first time. Even going so far as to say "Are you asking me to go through that again?" when she offers to take the risk of trying to lift Amity with her power. He wants Penny to be able to live her life.

This entire scene with Pietro established “this is what will likely happen” even if circumstances are much different now, it doesn’t negate the fact that this is a key part of Penny’s story. Scenes like these have a purpose beyond simply making an eventual death all the more heart wrenching. Her never actually getting to live her life makes those scenes basically moot. It makes them effectively pointless from narrative point of view. Unless there's more to it.

Building Relationship:

The build up between Ruby and Penny the last two volumes has been absolutely phenomenal with a definite destination in mind, and this doesn’t feel like that destination. So much of the arc of this season was to help Penny. This girl that our main protagonist absolutely adores and treasures, it would just be awful to throw all of that out for what amounts to an avoidable end. Why use so much of their precious and very limited runtime on deliberately building up this relationship only to end it abruptly, and permanently, when they’re separated?

In my opinion, RT is definitely smarter now than to intentionally set up what was really looking like a budding gay relationship only to kill one of them for good. If N&D wasn't actually going in a romantic direction, why would they leave in all of the romance-adjacent stuff that they got, that's not how ‘just friends’ act. And that is not something you use such valuable time building up for absolutely no pay off whatsoever...

Representation of Hope:

At its core, RWBY has always been about hope. It’s not at the forefront the whole time, but there's been an underlying theme of hopefulness that has persisted since it began. Some describe the show as a Hopepunk, I personally find this to describe RWBY really well. This genre of storytelling is about caring for things deeply and the courage and strength it takes to do so. It’s about never submitting or accepting the way things are. Fighting for what you believe in and standing up for others. RWBY fits all of this extremely well. How does this relate to Penny? She has been shown to be a sign of hope for everyone, but especially for Ruby, the main main protagonist. A prerequisite for a Hopepunk story is the hope.

Her first death in V3 was something that fundamentally changed Ruby. For the first time in the series, we see our main character all but broken by this event. With the loss of Penny, immediately afterwards, Ruby’s hope followed. She made up for it through determination and force of will. We see it affect her multiple times throughout the journey to Volume 7. But upon her return in V7, Hope reached a high point for everyone, the sheer relief on Ruby’s face is plain to see!

In V8 chapter 5 ‘Amity’, Penny literally raises hope by lifting the arena into the sky so Ruby could spread her message. And when she falls, and Amity with her, the connection is lost and hope plummets again. From there things take a very negative turn with the hack begins to take Penny’s agency.

In chapter 11 ’Risk’ is the point in the arc where everyone is reunited for the moment, so two separate hero stories are no longer a thing at that point in time. For the time being focus seemed to be shifted to care about the characters and how they’re going to solve the current problems. This is also where Ruby reaches her lowest emotional point in the season.

It’s not huge, but it’s interesting how connected this is. Before Ruby and Yang share a good cry over learning the possible fate of Summer, Yang brings up restoring optimism and hope to Ruby after the younger sister storms out of the room in frustration. This is where Penny’s scenes take up the rest of the episode. Getting Penny back in control of her own body and safe again is what makes the ending of the episode much brighter, when just 5 minutes before Ruby had been distraught and scared. This then spills over into the group coming up with the plan to use the staff, putting the main group in a much better mood. Of all the things to go right, it’s interesting that it’s Penny.

Things go wrong with the plan in the end and Penny dies. I find it interesting that once again, Penny got them hopeful in their chances of doing something right. Given said plan succeeded but at the cost of Penny of all people, Penny is shown to be the beginning and end of hope for them

The highest and lowest points for hope seem to directly correlate to when Penny’s around. When she comes back again, hope will return too, just like it had before. And because she’ll likely be back for good this time, the second return will probably be close to when Ruby is nearing the complete abandonment of hope. This would be pretty par for the course of the show honestly.

A little aside, but in a sense, Penny also represents Unity. The CCT in Vale fell after her first death, knocking out global communications and the unifying connection it gave. When it was restored for the briefest moment, she was there. Her body connected so she could allow for its launch, her soul lighting the night to hold up Amity with every ounce of her strength. So of course when the Hack succeeds and she falls, she takes global comms down again with her. At a smaller scale - even at the Hack's second last attempt to control her, she draws everyone in the Schnee Manor together. At the start of the volume, Yang states the one thing that they all agree on is not surrendering Penny.

Unity seems appropriate for one whose first song and wish was for but one friend, who would go on to find so many more in the process, and permit for a moment the possibility of all Remnant becoming friends once more. Where she first died, the name of the episode devoted to her story - Amity, "friendship", from the Latin root amicus, "friend" - she almost lives and dies with the very possibility of a united Remnant. It's no wonder she's a priority target for Salem, the great divider, and it seems natural that her next restoration may very well allow the next bid to bring the world together.

The Void Screams:

Moments after Penny's death, we hear a weird scream in the void space. It was a guttural, pained, angry scream, almost like the void space itself was crying out. All the portals shuddered and flickered when it happened.

Some think that this scream was Salem returning, but that happens earlier than Penny’s death, her return is signaled with cinder's arm acting up. We know this because after the arm finished flailing uncontrollably, Cinder said triumphantly "she's back." If it were Salem screaming, it would have happened after she fixed herself, but it didn't.

And I doubt Cinder would have been surprised or unsettled by it considering she was happy Salem returned not long before it. And why would a Salem scream affect the portals anyway, she has no connection to the staff or it's magic.

Another thing to consider is the fact sound is not transmitted through the portals. Otherwise, they would've heard Oscar and the rest calling for them, or the screams of the citizens of Mantle and Atlas. This lowers the possibility of that scream being from Salem even further.

The sound really seems to be coming from something else entirely within the void, and that something is not at all happy. There’s also the fact that Penny was the only person who died in the void space, everyone else was just thrown out of it like Ruby and Co. The only logical cause to me is Penny. Her body was a product (or byproduct) of the same creation magic that made the void space, her blood seems to have been a trigger.

Now I can't be sure about it, but this makes me feel like Penny is almost a part of creation itself? For whatever this thing is to be so angry, that is the only explanation I can think of currently. But all of this could possibly relate to the Narnia allusion of 'the willing victim killed in a traitor's stead' that others have brought up, which will be covered next.

Narnia Parallels:

Atlas has several parallels and references to fictional places (putting aside real world ones like the United States). One of those is that of Narnia, both on the surface and on a deeper level. It is a land of winter year round, where people struggle to survive and there is a present divide between those loyal to the current Monarch and those who are not. James is a parallel to Jadis, the White Witch, a ruler whose thoughts and cares aren’t exactly centered around the actual well being of the people. The hologram table in Ironwood’s office is designed to look like stone, like the Stone Table which features prominently in the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. He has a handpicked cadre of special agents/secret police, like how Maugrim and his wolves served Jadis. Another key parallel is how Jadis’s winter sets in to oppress and kill everyone in Narnia, but the Witch provides aid and protection to her loyal followers. She has all the power to spare harm to others, and uses it only for the loyal. As soon as Mantle splits from James and Atlas, no care is taken to protect them from the cold of Solitas even though he has every ability to turn the heating grid back on. His protection is only for the loyal.

Now that the parallel is established, let's look into the details. Starting with how James plays the role of Jadis.

"I had forgotten that you are only a common boy. How should you understand reasons of State? You must learn, child, that what would be wrong for you or for any of the common people is not wrong in a great Queen such as I. The weight of the world is on our shoulders. We must be freed from all rules. Ours is a high and lonely destiny." These are the words Jadis says in the Magician’s Nephew to justify the blood civil war she and her sister had waged for rulership of Charn, before she came to Narnia. She won that war, technically, but only after the last battle had been lost and her sister had marched right up to her so that they were face to face. Jadis’s troops were dead, her followers had surrendered, and the capital was under full control of her sister. But, she still had one card, one ultimate play to win and prove the throne of Charn was rightfully her. The Deplorable Word, a piece of old magic that killed everyone and everything except for her on Charn. It was monstrous, senseless, cruel beyond measure. But it got her that hollow victory. This mindset, the disregard for the people except as tools for her own will, the ultimate ‘aoe’ destructive move that no one had even considered her using, the unwillingness to stop even when by all practical measures the war is over, is a shocking parallel to James. In many ways, he is Jadis in mindset and deed.

Then there is the shared desire for A Thing that both James and Jadis have. For James it’s the Winter Maiden and control over her. For Jadis it’s the Silver Apples from the Tree of Youth. And funnily enough, the Maiden Powers parallel the Apples quiet well. These apples grant power and a life of eternal beauty, but should not be taken or eaten on one’s own initiative. They must be given, a gift granted by another, or only suffering will come from obtaining them. "For the fruit always works — it must work — but it does not work happily for any who pluck it at their own will. If any Narnian, unbidden, had stolen an apple and planted it here to protect Narnia, it would have protected Narnia. But it would have done so by making Narnia into another strong and cruel empire like Charn, not the kindly land I mean it to be.” Jadis’s immortality, and some of her power, come from the fact that she ate an Apple of her own will after stealing her way into the garden where the Tree of Youth had been planted. She gained the eternal life she had wanted and the power along with it, but she did so by taking it and was cursed because of it. Her skin turned pale and her lips blackened as if she were a frozen corpse given life. She will be trapped in a life of misery and hate according to Aslan- oh hey Cinder, how’s having stolen the Power you always wanted working out for you? Cinder had the power she wanted, but she only got hungrier, eager to claim more and increase her might. But in her pursuit she was defeated and humiliated by Raven, had to steal her way out of Mistral, and then suffered defeat after defeat while in Atlas. Only in the end, when she didn’t keep pursuing the Maiden Power, did she get any kind of victory.

The reason these parallels to Narnia are so important is one of the most famous events of the series. The cracking of the Stone Table and the rebirth of Aslan after his death. ‘When a willing victim who had committed no treachery was killed in a traitor's stead, the Table would crack and Death itself would start working backward.’ Well, the ‘Stone Table’ in James’s office has cracked, and Penny strikes me as a pretty willing victim. She has never actually committed any actual treachery or harm, as she was the Protector of Mantle, and fought for its and Atlas’s people until the very end. And because of her death, the actual traitor, Winter, who loyally served James until he had gone too far, was saved. Through Penny’s self sacrifice, Winter was saved. So now Death itself will start working backward.

(Major props to my friend @catontheweb for writing this section, I was getting nowhere with it, if they weren't there this part wouldn't exist!)

Norse Mythology:

The tree we see in the post credit scene gives off some serious Yggdrasil vibes. Also called the World Tree, it is essentially all of creation in Norse Mythology. It connects all nine realms, including the God realms of Asgard, the human realm of Midgard, and the underworld of Hel.

Humans are born from the branches of Yggdrasil. The web of Wyrd is woven for every person once they're born, and their path is set from there regardless of how many times the souls cycle over. But at the end, they're destined to end up in one of the worlds, for a myriad of reasons.

I believe Penny landed closest to this giant tree. She was on the center platform in the void space, so if that space is directly above the island(?) the tree is on, it makes sense for her to fall by the center nearest to the tree. This would not only open up all kinds of possibilities for the volume in general, but it would also create options for Penny.

The whole of Yggdrasil’s representations fit well into Penny’s story. Birth, growth, death and rebirth. We can count Penny’s appearance in V7 as birth for now, her growth is all her development in leaving =the military and becoming a Maiden, her death just happened, and her rebirth would be her revival. And this is a cycle she’s gone through before.

The Norse god Odin and Yggdrasil have quite a connection. In one story, Odin cut out one of his own eyes to gain knowledge from a pool underneath Yggdrasil. The only one that fell whose eyes alone are incredibly significant to the story was Ruby. So, they could choose to have her allude to Odin by having Ruby make some kind of deal with whatever entity likely rules over this magical place. An eye for Penny’s life.

There’s another story about Odin, Yggdrasil and the pursuit of knowledge. Odin so loved knowledge, that he sacrificed himself in a quest to learn the deeper magic of runes. It was believed one could only learn the magic spells from runes in death. So, Odin hung himself on Yggdrasil for nine days as an offering, and teetered between life and death. After he mastered the last spell on the ninth night, he ritually died and all light was extinguished from the world. Odin’s death lasted until midnight, when he was reborn and light returned to the world.

This story doesn’t fit Penny perfectly, but allusions often don’t. So If she really did land near the tree, she could be another loose representation of Odin’s story here. What she did wasn’t for knowledge, but to save her friends and keep Cinder from getting the Winter Maiden power. She believed it necessary that she sacrifice herself to achieve this end. As we established, Penny represents Hope, so her death means the loss of hope. This parallels Odin’s story of his death meaning the loss of light itself. So if this theory holds up, it would make this death temporary, until her rebirth and the return of Hope with her once again.

Alternatively, Ruby has the potential of loosely representing Odin in this story as well. Odin later uses the knowledge of the runes to do many things, but the most relevant one right now is awakening the dead. Both of these stories are about making a personal sacrifice to gain something that is desired. Ruby would absolutely make such sacrifices if it meant saving Penny.

It is said that Odin lived “according to his highest will unconditionally, accepting whatever hardships arise from that pursuit, and allowing nothing, not even death, to stand between him and the attainment of his goals." This sounds like Penny's arc of accepting the WM powers. This is more just a general connection between Penny and Odin, but I found it interesting.

Side Note: I encourage anyone who’s interested to look into RWBY connections to Norse Myth, there’s a surprising amount of things that feel eerily similar to the show. Likely just coincidental, but it’s fun to think about!

(If I got any of this wrong, I sincerely apologize by the way. I researched as best I could, but I admit it could have been lacking.)

Ambrosius and the Staff:

Ruby told Ambrosius "we kinda wanna keep her around longer than that" as part of her very specific instructions. Then Penny died about ten to fifteen minutes, at the absolute most thirty minutes later in-universe. I don’t know about you, but to me that seems very short to be considered ‘longer than that’. Technically it is, but when writing a story and a character says something like that, you typically don’t just kill the character they were referring to basically right away. It makes sense for a week-by-week watch, but in a volume binge, which many viewers do, it becomes ironic how fast Penny dies after being removed from her robotic body.

The first time we see the staff of creation being used, it's to save Penny. Using the staff of creation to help Penny is a sign of how incredibly important she is.

They’ve even got this entire transformation sequence for her, so it wouldn’t make sense for them to throw all that away two episodes later. In a meta context, it’s a massive waste of time and budget considering the asset creation for Penny.

Penny is a character who has already hopped bodies two times. And now we're supposed to just believe that this time it really is a final death? Just two episodes after we were explicitly told her body isn't what matters, that "Her soul is who she is" and that "the mechanical parts are just extra"? From a writing perspective, it feels strange, like your breaking a promise right after making it. And frankly, CRWBY is better than that, which makes me think this is not the actual end for her.

A possible connection between Penny, Ruby, and the Staff (thus Creation) can be seen in the intro. As Ruby is falling and being dragged down into the darkness, she is shown reaching for the staff. In the void space, Penny is the one with the relic. So with Penny having this strong connection to Creation, and the lyrics “fight for every life” playing as Ruby reaches for the staff, it’s a safe assumption to make, with the knowledge we now have, that the Staff of Creation represents Penny in this particular moment. Which could mean that V9 will be about, at least partially, fighting for Penny’s life.

Musical Hints:

In terms of music, Friend, as a song for Penny, is very dissonant from the episode itself. The song is oddly cheerful for Penny’s recent untimely death, and it overall highlights the wrong parts of death. It’s simply too happy to be a song about losing one of the most, if not the most joyous characters in the entire show. The song also abruptly ends. There’s no outro, and while this could symbolize the fact that Penny died young, it could be that the song itself is unfinished in a story sense.

What do we hear just before the song finishes, though? A progression of notes that sounds eerily similar to the last line of the opening of Volume 8. The notes for “Fight for ev’ry life” and “Who fin’lly felt alive'' share a similar melodic structure, they aren’t perfect clones of each other, but they are incredibly similar, to the point where it seems intentional. Penny may very well be the life that the opening song is fighting for. It is also worth noting that the line “Fight for every life” comes just after “Sometimes it’s worth it all to risk the fall,” which is the exact wording used for the description in the Volume 8 finale. Team RWBY risked the fall, yet, strangely the opposite of fighting for every life happened with Penny’s sacrifice. Perhaps the time to fight for every life has yet to happen, and we will see it come Volume 9.

For another thing, the lyrics for Friend are entirely centered on Penny’s feelings for Ruby, to the point where they read very much like a bittersweet love song. The music itself is incredibly cheerful, as mentioned previously, creating a mood whiplash with the end of the volume. Why would we hear a song about Penny’s feelings for Ruby, sounding like a love song, if her death is supposed to be a tragic sacrifice akin to Pyrrha’s? The song may very well be giving a clue into its future use in the show proper.

If this was meant to be a good bye song, why make it so cheerful and romantic sounding? There's only one part about her dying and even then, it's just too accepting and goes right back into cheerfulness. The song is also pretty hopeful, telling Penny's story in a fairly chronological order. And the part where she talks about sacrifice is quite pointedly followed up by one about feeling alive. It also ends with the super cheerful chorus, the word "alive" being the last... (Remember the episode title: The Final Word)

(I want to thank my friend @shadow-0f-x for writing the majority of this section! I was struggling to choose how to tackle it as I am not well versed in music theory.)

What We Didn’t See:

It is likely that Penny understood Jaune's semblance better than him and figured something out about it’s abilities in the same way that she understood Ruby's semblance better than her. She had plenty of time to observe his semblance up close as he boosted her aura to stave off the virus. Because of that intentionally timed cutaway in the finale, we don’t get to hear her explain herself after her strained “Trust me.” All of that seems really suspicious to me.

Pyrrha Parallel:

Pyrrha and Penny both sacrificed themselves to stop or stall Cinder. Jaune tried to convince the both of them to stop. With Pyrrha, he failed, while with Penny he actively helped her sacrifice herself. Doesn’t make sense for the guy who was determined not to let anyone else do what Pyrrha did, unless of course Penny assured him she’d be alright.

The Moment:

RT including the suicide hotline in the description shows that they're aware that Penny basically committed assisted suicide, seeing it as a noble sacrifice worth doing to save her friends. They're aware, and I believe they're smart enough to condemn that decision to hell and back.

The best way to do that in my opinion is to pull her back into the land of the living and let her witness first hand the consequences of throwing her life away so freely. This would show Penny how her actions affected others so maybe she could learn to truly value herself. To not think herself expendable. It would be bold and unwise to portray this choice as something good, unless it was going to be called upon later and be pointed out for how horrible it really is.

On top of this, Penny was way too content with her death, happy even. There's no way team RWBY is letting her stay content with it. It’s almost as though we're supposed to join Ruby and Co. in calling bullshit on what Penny is saying and doing because no, Penny, this is not how things are meant to work. It's as if Penny was basically saying "I want to die for my friends" because most of the volume had been about everyone else making sure she didn't die. She knows it will hurt them. She knows.

At the peak of it all, a choice like this will totally destroy Ruby. It may very well be her breaking point for Volume 9. Curiously, the moment itself is written like it’s the first choice Penny’s ever made, yet the entire Volume shows this isn’t the case. However, this is the first choice that Penny’s made solely independently and it’s rather pertinent that the choice she makes is a mistake. Outside of giving Winter the Maiden gift and saving the day temporarily, this sacrifice will not have any lasting positive effects. Jaune will be saddled with the grief of killing Penny. Ruby will have to live with losing her best friend and not being able to protect her a second time, and Winter now has the burden of the Winter Maiden abilities, making her a target of Cinder. This is a bad thing, and Penny needs to see the long term consequences.

Transfer of Power:

As we all know, colors in RWBY are really important and get a lot of focus in the show. That means the yellow we see as Penny gives Winter the Maiden Powers was intentional and likely important, no matter how insignificant it may seem. It’s possible that the transfer effect being yellow could have something to do with Jaune’s semblance. When Fria gave the power to Penny, the effect was very much blue, so this transfer should have been green since she was the one giving it this time. The weirdness of this transfer and the focus on color in RWBY really makes it look like something’s up with how that went down.

A little off topic, but Penny saying "I won't be gone, I'll be part of you." makes me think... Winter is smart, so when she gets time to think about what Penny said, maybe she'll arrive at the same question many in the audience came to; if she's literally part of Winter, can they be separated again? If Winter starts questioning that, the possibility of Penny coming back just skyrockets.

Fria actually tells Penny "I'll be gone" before giving her powers up, which is an interesting contrast to Penny telling Winter "I won't be gone". She may have gotten that line from Winter be all philosophical in V7, saying Fria was now a part of Penny, but it hits differently coming from an actual Maiden. S5o it’s possible that Maidens usually actually will be gone, but Jaune's semblance did something to change that.

This could go well with the theory that they won't need to find an aura transfer machine, or build another one, because Jaune will have a semblance evolution allowing him to do the transfer instead. It might actually be that this evolution already happened and the golden light we saw was Jaune transferring penny's aura to Winter in some way?

An observation that I find interesting is when Penny gives winter the powers, not only is the aura yellow but penny completely glows yellow too, and she obviously starts to disappear, but she doesn’t seem to fully disappear, she just glows.

It's possibly a fading out effect and she does fully fade but animation makes bright light easier, and so we don't actually see her disappear because she's dead and not gone. But it does once again emphasize the color yellow here!

And the color is coming from Penny, it does go up Winter's arm a bit, but Penny is clearly the source. This transfer is so weird and I’m not really sure how to interpret it. There's just actually no reason that we are aware of to make the effect yellow here is the thing. Unless it has something to do with either Jaune or Ambrosius, or potentially a combination of both...

Jaune’s Aura:

The way we see Jaune's aura break in the finale is strange. His aura shouldn't be breaking here. It had been long enough since he was boosting Penny, he's had time to recharge, and it didn't look like it was a strain on him at all. Plus, we know he has a lot of aura, so there probably wasn't too much to recharge in the first place.

He has a massive amount of aura, it has never broken before as far as I remember. Even if it has though, that doesn’t make this occurrence any less odd. It should absolutely never be a one-hit KO. We didn't see anything that would've drained it, that should not have been enough to break his aura. Unless he did something - something that would require a huge amount of aura - that we just didn't see. That amount of aura drain is far more than just an attempt at healing would do, Jaune absolutely did something with his semblance that took up almost all of his aura.

Pinocchio Allusion:

As any Penny fan knows, her character allusion is Pinocchio, the puppet who became a real boy. Penny deviates from the allusion by having always been a real girl, as Ruby is quick to point out, but she shares many story beats with her original story including multiple deaths. In the original story, Pinocchio dies from being hung by his own strings due to his poor decision making and he dies. Sounds a little familiar, does it not? This is where his tale originally ended. Readers were unsatisfied with this ending however, so the author decided to change the story by reviving Pinocchio and teaching him to be more careful.

Unlike Pinocchio making all the wrong decisions, Penny often makes the right ones, or ones she thinks is right, when concerning others. While usually a good thing, this has meant Penny almost giving herself up multiple times during V8, her last attempt being successful. This is where Penny and Pinocchio begin to share similarities again. They are both very reckless when it concerns themselves. This carelessness comes from different places, but it ends with the same result of them endangering their lives and even sometimes losing them.

In the Disney movie, Pinocchio dies by drowning after going to rescue Geppetto and washes up on the shore (like the beach in V8’s post credit scene). His father is devastated and takes him home to grieve, but as a reward for his selflessness in rescuing his father, the Blue Fairy returns and brings him back to life, as well as granting him humanity. Penny sacrificed her life as well, and it stands to reason that she should be rewarded for it, much like her allusion was.

Penny got her maiden powers from someone with blue aura and then gave her powers to someone with blue aura. So it could be that not only Ambrosius, but Fria and Winter as well represent the Blue Fairy. It could be set up for Winter helping to bring Penny back to life once more. It’s an out there theory I admit, but it’s not outright impossible either. The Blue Fairy in Pinocchio saved him three times that I know of, so RWBY having three representations does make sense.

Geppetto wished for him to live as a real boy, but it depended on what path Pinocchio took. This is very reminiscent of Penny and Pietro. Pietro wants to see her live her life, and surely with him absent in V8C14 that didn't work, despite Penny choosing. Her father did not see her happy enough to live her life, and will only be able to learn her death through others. But Pinocchio's themes were life and being alive. So the likelihood that this is not her end yet is quite high!

A Girl That Fell Through the World:

Penny could be the girl who fell through the world. The girl in the story fled the consequences of a choice. The only person who chose her ultimate fate was Penny. The others were pushed into the void, but she chose to die. The consequence of her choice is Ruby’s grief first and foremost, which Penny won’t see. The girl who fell through the world does come back though, and the world will be changed severely with Penny’s absence. Alternatively, it could also be Penny coming back to Wonderland or wherever they currently are, as long as it’s unrecognizable to her.

What Returning Brings:

Others might say another return would have no story relevant purpose, but I wholeheartedly disagree. Penny gives a profoundly youthful, joyous, and wondrous outlook on the world and story that we hadn't seen since Ruby in Volumes 1-3(not the end), Penny returning would bring a much needed levity back in after the despair they will undoubtedly be going through. While not necessarily a huge thing in most other shows, for RWBY, a show largely about keeping up hope, an ounce of such relief is a necessity.

As much as I hate saying it, Penny’s death does actually make some narrative sense because she had to pass on the Maiden powers. (They could have done this in a number of ways, and I personally think they chose rather poorly, but I digress.) Throughout this whole volume, we can see Penny seemingly being set up to join the main cast, but would have been too strong with the powers. This also accomplishes ridding her of the burden of responsibility that comes with being a Maiden and lets her obtain the freedom that’s so important to her character.

Once she returns, seeing this grief that her actions caused, particularly to Ruby, will get her to realize more that her actions can have serious repercussions. She made a choice, but that choice hurt the people she loves. She must have known that it would but I’m not sure she ever realized just how much.

I didn’t want this post to be heavy in the shipping department, so I largely left it out, but I am going to say this one thing that could have an impact. If Nuts & Dolts is on its way to being canon, which this volume makes it feel highly likely, this could be a catalyst.

It could prompt an arc for the both of them in which Penny learns to live her life fighting for her loved ones, rather than sacrificing it for them. A relationship could potentially start from there. And Ruby seeing Penny learn these things may also help her to stop doing the occasional but very dangerous and reckless things she does. Ruby witnessing Penny coming to terms with what she did to the people that care about her would actually make her stop to think “wait, is this how everyone else would feel if I got myself killed?” That would be a very important moment of character growth for her.

I’m certain there are other significant things that Penny returning can bring to the show. And there are definitely more sections I could add to this. At this point though, assuming anyone even made it this far, I think I’ve been going long enough already. So let’s just roll into the outro!

As painful and hopeless as it seems, I'm choosing to trust them with this because there is absolutely no way they didn't see backlash coming. The way this finale went makes me think that they calculated for backlash and aren’t jumping into something they don’t have a plan to recover from. Whether this trust is unfounded or not remains to be seen, but I don’t think it is currently. I do think, however, that the cause of this backlash was a major misstep. Now that it has happened though, they have a chance to do something good with it.

I know for a lot of you, trust in CRWBY has been damaged, some even irreparably so. And for those that feel this way, I don’t blame you. My trust in them took a hit too, but isn’t broken completely yet. There are many ways that they can bring her back that would make sense with the narrative, they have the ability to make it right, and after going over all of the hints and general weirdness of things many times, I think they will.

I'm feeling pretty confident now and I really didn't expect that to happen at all to be honest. But discussing and theorizing with the discord server seriously helped get my hopes back up surprisingly fast! It’s actually thanks to all of them that this gigantic post even happened! So thanks a ton my fellow Dolts! And a special thanks to!!

@arcana-amicus

@catontheweb

@cosmokyrin

@gaydontmesswithme224

@jammatown919

@shadow-0f-x

They really helped get this thing across the finish line!

And thank YOU for reading all~ of this! I sincerely wish it gave you some of the hope and confidence that I now have!

#RWBY #rwby vol8 #rwby v8 #rwby spoilers #Penny Polendina #nuts and dolts #mechanical rose #a little #Essay #more like dissertation #I haven't written this much in #probably ever actually #Have HOPE people!

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bakugoshrimp · 4 years

Text

Comfort

Where Y/N has a breakdown, and Bakugo helps.

Pairing: Bakugo x Female!Y/N

Word Count: 1.3k words

A/N: So uhh, I feel like i took a lot of creative liberties here, but yeahh. This is purely self indulgent and ngl, most likely OOC (Out of Character) Bakugo. It also might seem dramatic considering she had a breakdown over a single grade, but again, it’s purely self-indulgent and yes I imagined this whole thing to calm myself down . Please be nice, but constructive criticism is welcome! Also, I have no clue what universe they’re in but its like a mix between BNHA and our reality lmao. Also I might come back to this and fix up grammatical errors and anything that sounds weird, and change up the title bc I’m extremely uncreative help.

Song: Ribs by Lorde (I’m in a Lorde phase don’t mind me)

It was loud. Loud in your head, loud in your ears, just loud. You tried to stop the feeling of numbness, tried to drown out the screaming thoughts by quickly stuffing your earphones into your ears, and increasing the volume of the music blasting through your earphones, tried to ignore the pain in your heart.

My mom and dad let me stay home; It drives you crazy, getting old; This dream isn't feeling sweet; We're reeling through the midnight streets; And I've never felt more alone; It feels so scary, getting old;

You tried to stop the tears from spilling as the meaning of everything just hit you, hit you so hard it just left you reeling, as you tried to reel all the thoughts all the feelings back into your heart, just to get everything to stop. You just wanted everything to stop, you didn't wanna feel hurt anymore; didn't want to feel scared anymore didn't want to feel pain anymore; it was all just so exhausting.

But your brain wouldn't listen to you; drowning you with the thoughts swirling so fast you can only understand fragments of them. You can barely remember what happened as you ran out of the class, and to your room; lights off as you just curled up under your blanket, cuddling your plushie so hard as you tried, and failed, to keep the tears from falling.

It took him a total of 10 minutes for him to find you. He hadn't missed the heartbroken look on your face when they all received the marks for their weekly biology quizzes at the end of their class; hadn't missed the panic and exhaustion threading through your every movement for the month as you struggled to finish the overwhelming amount of assignments.

He watched you as you waited until the classroom was empty when you tried to discretely flee to privacy, packing up your stuff as fast as you could, but not before he caught a glimpse of the big fat F scrawled on top.

Cussing every single teacher under his breath, he jumped out of his seat. He knew you wanted to specialize in biology, and knew every single dream and worry you had, having spent nights just whispering to each other everything on nights you couldn't sleep from everything.

He quickly followed you, knocking softly on the door to your room before slipping in, closing the door softly behind him because he knows how much you hate to cry in front of others; knows how much you hate showing this one weakness in front of others. You two were a lot alike in that regard.

Crouching down in front of the bed, he uncovered your tear-stricken face from under the blanket, suppressing a wave of anger at everyone who made you cry. Your eyes were bloodshot, your eyelids swollen from all the tears.

You flinched slightly at the cool air sitting your wet face, a sharp contrast to the suffocatingly humid temperature under the blanket. You already knew who it was, had memorized the sound of his footsteps, but didn't dare to look at him, scared of crying if you do.

"Why am I such a failure?" your hoarse voice was the only sound in the still room, hands still gripped tightly around your plushie.

Bakugo chuckled slightly, clambering into your bed and hugged you, your tears wetting his dry shirt. "I ask myself that too, you know. Why are you such a dumbass?"

A strong rough hand, gently but firmly gripped your chin, making your watery eyes meet his soft and determined crimson eyes. "Y'know, maybe you're a dumbass, but that doesn't make you a failure."

"But I'm failing everything. This fricking course-"

"Two quizzes and an essay does not mean everything. You still have time, and you will still excel. And you can say f**ck you to those who say otherwise. So you bombed this quiz; that doesn't mean it's the end of the world for you. So many people around the world fail, but those experiences will only make them stronger and more fierce than ever." He said fiercely, fire red eyes burning into yours. "Why do you think we train so much? It's to make us make mistakes, and to learn from them."

His warm lips touched your forehead in an endearing kiss, and added, "If you want, I can blow them out of the sky for you."

You let out a watery giggle, and took a shuddering breath, inhaling his caramel scent and cologne.

"So what do you do now?" Bakugo asked, after a few minutes of quiet contemplation.

You simply burrowed your head further into his chest, your voice muffled as you said "I don't wanna do anything; I just wanna sleep here with you forever."

Bakugo threw his head back as he barked out a rough laugh. "You and I know that's not possible, teddy bear. Plus would you let this one puny mark beat you down? Come on, you and I both know you're much stronger than that."

"No I'm not." was your only reply.

At that, Bakugo rolled off the bed, snatching the plushie from your arms as he stood up, the sudden loss of his body heat and the comforting weight of said plushie from your arms eliciting a whine.

"Give it back," you whined, making grabby arms in Bakugo's general direction as you shoved your face into your pillow.

"Nope, not until you admit to yourself that you're a much stronger person than you give yourself credit for," Bakugo demanded.

"But that would be lying, and you hate lying." You accused, shooting up and turning around to face him.

He simply leaned in, close enough that your noses are almost touching. "That's why you wouldn't be lying. Say it, or the stupid ugly thing gets it." To prove his point, tiny explosions crackled off his unoccupied hand.

"Hey!" you protested "it's not stupid nor ugly; it's just old. Stop bullying it."

"Then say it."

"Fine. I'm a strong person. Happy?"

"Say it with conviction and believe in it too, dumbass."

You let out a deep sigh, rolling your eyes as you said "I'm a strong person, and I won't let some puny stupid marks break me down because I'm much better than that."

Seemingly satisfied with your answer, he leaned in and pecked your lips as he threw the plushie onto your bed. "Now get up. We have our chem lab report due midnight and I still haven't started mine, and I know you didn't start yours yet."

You grumbled as you stood up and stretched, "I hate school."

Bonus:

Bakugo grumbled over the stove, stirring the noodles as a delicious smell wafted around the mini kitchen. You were sitting on the counter nearby, hands wrapped around a mug of hot chocolate (it was originally black tea but Bakugo had swapped it quick so you would be able to sleep tonight), legs swinging slightly as you drifted away in your thoughts.

The explosive blonde turned around, smacking you back to reality with his wooden spoon. “Oi dumbass, stay with me here.”

He was well aware of your ability to dwell on past mistakes, even after your tears were long dried, which was the only reason why he decided to let you bully him into making fried noodles at 11 pm after both of you had successfully submitted your assignments.

You jolted back into reality, blinking at him. “Yeah I’m here don’t worry, ‘Suki”

He merely hmphed before turning to the stove, turning it off before separating the hot food into two different plates. Handing one to you, he gestured to the nearby table with his chin. After both of you finished your meals, a comfortable silence falling between you two as you simply enjoyed each others presence. Scooting your chair loudly to be next to his, you smacked your possibly greasy lips against his cheeks much to his disgust, and laid your head on his shoulder.

“ ’Suki?” you said, earning a questioning hrm from him. “Thank you.”

Ignoring the warm feeling blossoming in his chest, he simply slung an arm around you, pressing his lips to the side of your head in response.

#katsuki bakugou x reader #bakugo x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #katsuki bakugo #bakugo katsuki #bakugo x y/n #katsuki bakugo x y/n #hurt/comfort #shrimp attempts to write

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lilyharvord · 4 years

Text

The Chain (Part 5)

Main Concept: Two love struck idiots get sent back to a pretty UGH time period in their lives (that required me to reread all the books again) and have to hide the fact that they know everything.

Find Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4

Tag list: @delilahlbard @king-maven-calore @scxrletguardsdawn @freaky-freiday @whatsup-gorls @kuwei @redqueenetwork @elane-in-the-shadows @evangeline-of-montfort @evangelineartemiasamos @petergrantkavinsky (girl I’m so sorry that I haven’t tagged you yet!) @thatoddgirl777 @elliekratzzz. If you want a tag please ask ((:

Chapter 5

Cal leaves me a few houses away from my own, and stays in the shadows of another home’s stilts while I walk the last hundred meters to my porch. I can spot the outline of my father’s shadow in the dark as I approach and I glance over my shoulder once to make sure Cal is concealed. Even to my now trained eye, I can’t spot him. He’s much better at hiding now.

“You shouldn’t worry your mother like that,” my father’s voice rumbles from the shadows, his eyes narrowed. They dance over my shoulder, probably trying to spot what I am looking for. He won’t spot Cal though. At least, he won’t spot him if Cal stays put until we get onto the porch. While I love him, sometimes he’s not the brightest bulb in the country.

“I’m sorry.” I whisper to my father as he squints at the shadows down the street. If Cal didn’t stay put I think I might have to kill him.

Slowly turning his eyes back to me, my father shifts in his chair before jabbing a thumb at the utility box. He lets out a huff. “Power went out. Thought I’d give it a look.” He wheels over to the source of his musings wheezing the whole way. I follow dutifully, already sensing the electric current humming from the ground. I can tell which wire is faulty too. Like a small spot of darkness in otherwise pure light, it sticks out like a sore thumb. “’Lec papers didn’t work?” I ask as I watch him try to tinker with the box.

He pulls one of them from his shirts and feeds it into the box. Nothing happens though. Twisting my lips to the side, I step in front of him and hear his wheel’s squeak as he rolls out of my way.

“What are you going to do? You can’t fix the damn busted thing.” He grumbles, and that clicking in his chest gets louder as he coughs.

Prying the thing open with my fingers, I glance at the mess of wires. I need him to look away while I do this. I can’t have him seeing what I can do, especially if all I do is grab a wire and all the lights turn on. I step back from it then, knowing that I’ll have to do it the old fashioned way.

He rolls forward and smacks the box before I can even try to do anything. His hand hits the metal with a deadening thump that I can feel through my own resting on top. I watch as he continues to hit it, hoping to bring something to life with each swing. I let him throw one good hit before thrusting life back into the box. Sparks dance on the wires, and above us, the porch light hums to life.

“Well, fancy that,” Dad mutters before spinning in the mud and wheeling himself back to his pulley. Closing the box with one hand, I clench my other hand into a fist to quench the sparks that want to explode to life.

He waits for me to approach before buckling in and saying, “No more running.”

I nod and try to smile. I don’t have the heart to tell him what he needs to hear. I’ll be gone by tomorrow and I won’t be back for days. They’ll think I’m dead, and that’s fine. We’re alright someday, I promise myself as I watch the rig rise to the porch with a whine. When he gets there, I climb the ladder, using the time to glance in the shadows for Cal. One detaches and starts walking. He stayed the whole time, I think with a stupid smile. Maybe he had gotten a little smarter.

At the top, Dad struggles with the rig and I scramble up the ladder before helping him with the belts. When he’s finally free, he mutters, “Bugger of a thing.”

I can’t help but smile. For all his rough edges, I know what is beneath. “Mom will be happy you’re getting out of the house.”

He grabs my hand tightly, and the callouses there rub at my skin, reminding me that we’re not out of this hell hole yet. His hands never do soften, no matter how long he lives in Montfort.

“Don’t tell your mother,” he whispers to me. I purse my lips in response, knowing that given today, she could use even the resemblance of hope. “But—“

“I know it seems like nothing, but it’s enough of something. She’ll think it’s a step on a big journey, you see? First I leave the house at night, then during the day, then I’m rolling around the market with her like it’s twenty years ago. Then things go back to the way they were.” His eyes darken as he recounts what I know will come to pass. He fights to keep his emotions at bay, his voice only wavering slight at the end. “I’m not getting better, Mare. I’m never going to feel better. I can’t let her hope for that, not when I know it’ll never happen. Do you understand?”

I nod, understanding absolutely what that means. Hope comes in small flares to my family, only to be snuffed out. My brothers return from war, but not Shade. Then Shade returns, only to be lost again. They lose Shade, but they gain Clara. They lose me, but my father gains his legs and lungs back. They say goodbye to me on a tarmac when I fly back to Norta to save a country that has never bothered with me, but gain their safety. They almost lose me in Norta when I go the second time. I return to them though, dragging a heartbroken prince behind me. I wish I could tell Dad what is coming, that the future will be better, even if we lose parts of ourselves along the way. He rolls inside though, leaving me on the porch while a weak river breeze cuts through my hair.

((((/////////))))

I’m already awake when the officers kick down our door. I couldn’t sleep, planning every second of tomorrow down to the second. I don’t care that my plan may not survive the first few moments. I will make sure that nothing goes completely off kilter.

I wake Gisa slowly, and help her out of her cot then down the ladder. She accepts my help at first, and leans on her good arm for support as she goes. Mom waits for us on the floor, and opens her arms to Gisa before engulfing her in a hug. She keeps her eyes on my though. I know why. They’ve come for me, and whatever motherly instinct she possess has told her so.

Two officers wait by the door, with Walsh between them. My chest tightens at the sight of her. In almost a month, she will be foaming at the mouth on the floor a chamber. Does she feel her clock ticking down like I do?

“We submit to search and seizure,” Dad grumbles, but the officers don’t move. Walsh raises a clean brow at my father’s words though. Stepping forward she brings her eyes to me. “Miss Barrow, you have bee summoned to Summerton.”

I expel the breath I’m holding. I had worried that Cal had given Walsh different orders, maybe to take me another way, but apparently he understood that today has to occur. Gisa’s good hand closes around mine, and I hear for the first time her whisper, “no.”

“You have been summoned to Summerton,” Walsh repeats when I stay rooted to the spot, shocked by Gisa’s words. “We will escort you. Please proceed.”

She gives me a smile as I step forward, but Gisa doesn’t let go of my hand. Seeing this Walsh dips her head to my parents. “Don’t worry, everything’s settled after yesterday. The Hall and the market are well controlled now. Please proceed.”

This is a summons from the crown prince, even if Walsh doesn’t know that, she has to follow her orders. We can’t arrive too early though. I have to get there just in time, so that everything lines up. Turning back to Gisa, I untangle my hand from hers. She leaps forward, making a move to grab me, but Mom holds her back. I give her a little smile in response, hoping to calm her nerves. “I’ll see you soon.”

Dad’s hand brushes my arm, his own form of goodbye, while Mom’s eyes swim with tears. One of the officers grabs my arm and pulls me toward the door. I look back at the three of them though. The world changes from here too. When they see me again, I won’t be the same. Cal will be with me this time though. We’ll have to come up with something far more convincing than him being from Harbor Bay when we see my family again. We’ll be prepared for that encounter at least.

The door slams in my face, and I turn forward to watch Walsh descend our ladder. One of the officers pushes me toward it and I follow her to the ground. I’m hustled through the village then, and I know why. Queenstrial awaits, and Walsh does not want to be late.

I focus on my hands the entire ride in the transport, counting the seconds until I’m trapped in gilded cage with Elara. While Montfort tried to teach us ways to combat whispers, the methods aren’t perfect. Elara was a master of her craft too, I don’t know how much my techniques will help me. My secrets have to remain my own though. She can’t know what is to come.

We stop at the gate, and after we are let through, I feel Walsh’s eyes on me. She gives me a soft smile. “I’m Ann, by the way, but we mostly go by last names. Call me Walsh.”

I know. I know more about her than she could ever imagine. She raises a brow at my continued silence. I snap my head when I realize she’s waiting for me to respond. Her name is supposed to ring a bell. Grimacing, I say, “You’re from the Stilts.”

“I am. I knew your brother Tramy, and I wish I didn’t know Bree. A real heartbreaker that one.” She teases, and I can’t help the smile that those words conjure. A heartbreaker indeed. He had half of the Montfort women eating out of the palm of his hand after living there for only two months. She tilts her head to the side at my expression and muses, “I don’t know you though. But I certainly will.”

Yes, yes you will. You’ll probably regret it too.

She waits for another response before raising a brow. “Not the talking type I see. Well, you should know you’ll be working long hours here. I don’t know who hired you or what they told you about the job, but it starts to wear on you. It’s not all changing bedsheets and cleaning plates. You have to look without seeing, hear without listening. We’re objects up there, living statues meant to serve.”

Not for much longer.

She sighs before opening the door of the transport and helping me out. After wrenching open a door from the wall, she begins to lead me down a flight of stairs. I follow quickly. Queenstrial awaits. Cal is waiting. He told me once that today was both the worst and best day of his life. Worst because he knew it was the day he would never escape Evangeline again, and the best because I managed to ruin everything about Evangeline’s big day. I had pushed a pillow into his face in response, and he’d laughed himself hoarse about it.

Walsh hurries down the stairs, looking over her shoulder to shout, “Keep up, I don’t have time to hold your hand!” Scrambling to catch her, I descend into a dark tunnel that runs underneath the market and into the Hall of the Sun. She waits for only a moment before saying, “You serve the king now, there’s no time for dilly dallying.”

((((/////////))))

I hurry along a hall of the Spiral Garden, keeping my eyes on the red servant in front of me. He’s much older than me, and I can see it in the way his shoulders slump as he walks. Queenstrial is set to begin, and a bead of sweat runs down my neck when I being to wonder if I’m in the right place. What if I’m not in the right place in line? How long was I in the Samos box for? What if I’m not the servant that goes up to the box I fell out of? Can I stage a fall from the servant’s box? I doubt it.

By the time I get to the elevated platform the other servants are standing on, I bump my way into line, hoping that I’m in the right place. As I do so, the High Houses enter. I strain to catch sight of them, memories of sitting with Lady Blonos and memorizing their colors bubbling to the surface. Dark blue and red, House Iral. Blue and green, House Osanos. Green and Gold, House Welle. Green and Black, House Viper. Gold and Black, House Provos. I can recall them all from memory. In another year, many of them will be dead.

I look them all over, and manage to spot Ara Iral, looking beyond bored in her box. But she’s also spying, I know that, cataloging everything away for later. In my distraction, I almost miss my call to the Samos box. I leap to attention, hurrying but trying to make it look like I’m not. I dance between bodies, lighter on my feet than I was even when I was this age.

I enter the Samos box silently, shifting the curtain aside. From behind, I can see every muscle Ptolemus tries to hide in his fancy shirt. Like Cal, he’s never been able to hide the fact that he would rather be a warrior. My stomach still curls at the sight of him. To think in a few months he will be the reason Clara doesn’t have a father. The sight of Volo makes me queasy. Evangeline told me what fate befell her father in Archeon during the Lakelanders attack, and I wonder if I’ll ever be able to look him in the eye without picturing his face flattened against the deck of a ship.

I draw my tongue along my lip before saying, “Sir?” He doesn’t even notice me, and a part of me almost laughs. What I wouldn’t give for him to ignore me like this in a few months. Soon, he won’t be able to. He holds out the empty water glass to me, a bored look on his face. “They’re toying with us, Ptolemus.”

Taking the glass from him, I wait for Ptolemus to finish his. His eyes dance to me in confusion for a moment over his rim before he offers me the glass. I stifle the shake in my hand as I take it, panic coursing through me as he continues to watch my hands. “A demonstration of power, Father.” He says nonetheless as I hurry away to hide my face from him. “They make us wait because they can.”

I want to spit in his face, or at least make a face in his direction like a child. To think Cal still respects you when you talk about him like a dog you can’t get to heel. Then again, Cal never did hesitate to throw a quip about Ptolemus out.

I fill their glasses at the sink when the tone sounds, announcing the royal family. I close my eyes and expel a slow exhale. From where I hide in the flowers, I can see the High Houses all rise to their feet. Ptolemus whispers something to Volo, and I wish I was close enough to know what it was. Peeking out from the flowers, I watch as Cal’s father steps onto the balcony. My skin prickles at the sight of him. I can’t begin to imagine what Cal felt the first time he saw him. I know the first time I see Shade I’ll clutch him a hug like never before. I couldn’t imagine Cal doing that with his father, but I’m sure even being near him is making his heart ache. This is a torture neither of us could ever prepare for. Perhaps that’s the dark side of Giselle ability. You could see your happiest moments and the people you haven’t seen in years, only to remember that this has already occurred and you are simply reliving pain.

From behind him, Elara floats out. I have to clutch the sink to keep from ducking out of sight. She doesn’t know I’m here, she doesn’t even know I exist yet. My plan is going to fail within seconds of seeing her, I know it. My weak little defenses will not withstand her ability. She’ll see everything. She’ll kill Cal, and hang his body up for everyone to see. Weak like his mother, she’ll say. He was sympathetic to the reds, he had to be removed. And it will be my fault.

“Death to the Scarlet Guard!” rings out from several of the boxes, jarring me from thoughts. I dare a glance to see who is yelling. Haven is the only house I have time to catch before the King shouts back at them.

“The Scarlet Guard—and all our enemies—are being dealt with!” The crowd silences immediately and my lips curl up in a smile at that. I don’t miss this man, not in the slightest.

“—today we honor tradition, and no Red devil will impede that. Now is the rite of Queenstrial, to bring forth the most talented daughter to wed the most eligible son.” He continues in his speech, and I crane my neck down the stairs to check on Volo. He hasn’t moved, although he does lean over to whisper something else to Ptolemus. I grip the glass tightly in my hand as I turn the sink on again to hide my breathing. I might be sick right here in this room. If I see him, if I look into those blue eyes will I be able to avoid falling apart?

“Both of my sons honor our most solemn custom,” he waves them forward, and I dare a glance at the back of their heads. Cal’s on the other side of his father. He can’t see me, unless her turns his shoulders and cranes his neck slightly. I squeeze my hand into a fist though as Maven slowly turns, raising his hand in a greeting I know has been perfected by his mother. I slowly set the glasses down and grab the edge of the sink.

He’s so young, so… clear eyed. He’s not haunted by his demons yet. They’re still alive and standing next to him though. And in that moment, as I look at him, I begin to regret everything. I should have just told Cal that we could do this alone. That we could get to Montfort on our own. We would be at the Rift by now if we had left last night. I should have ignored Jon, I should have said to hell with his meddling, and run. I can’t face Maven again.

Cal is announced. He turns slowly, smiling and waving politely. When he turns to the Samos box, I can see his eyes searching. When he pauses, and makes eye contact with me, I raise my hand in a small wave. His hand barely twitches. It could be a wave to the Samos family and the others Houses will never know it was for me. He turns forward once more, and I turn the sink off.

I told him I could do this, I told him that we were in this together. I can’t leave him now.

In a daze, I leave Volo and Ptolemus their glasses. Even as I climb the stairs, I can’t forget the brief flash of Maven’s eyes. I won’t be able to escape them after this. Inhaling slowly but surely, I return to the servants’ platform. I feel like I can’t breathe. In an hour, I will let myself fall off a platform and into a force field and then, I’ll let myself be betrothed to the man who tried to kill me numerous times. Is this what Cal felt? In the first moment that he had run into Maven, had he felt this rush of emotions? Had his chest felt like it was going to cave in, and his legs were going to fall out from underneath him?

His father is still shouting, completing the announcement of Queenstrial. I dare another look at him. He’s still smiling, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. As every house claims their right to Queenstrial, his smile wavers a little more until it falls so low that he has to brings his lips back up. Just a little longer, I want to tell him.

When his father turns to Lord Provos to order the arena created, Cal’s eyes dance up to the servants’ box, and catch mine. His shoulders rise and fall in what must be a slow, deliberate exhale. He’s searching for control, or maybe a reprieve. He won’t get one until we find Giselle though.

Underneath my feet, the platform lurches, and moves. That’s the last look I’ll get until he finds me in that hallway. The hum of electricity underneath my feet tells me the shield has activated, and the fight has only begun. The floor opens and Rohr appears a moment later. She’s even tinier than I remember. She bats her doe like eyes at Cal, and smiles. She’s little more than a child. So was I though. I’m older now though, and I have the wisdom to back it up.

((((/////////))))

It feels like it has been hours. My eyes burn, and my skin crawls until I feel like I’m going to explode like a live wire. Any longer and I might just throw myself over the railing and into the shield to kick start this whole thing. Evangeline was last, but as the parade continues, I softly set my hand on the railing, prepared to throw myself over.

The minute I think I might actually do that though, the platform at the bottom rises once more, and the sun catches the highlights of platinum blonde hair. My heart beats erratically and a bead of sweat rolls down the back of my neck. Her eyes dart up and around, but her expression is cold. Years ago, I thought that the light in her eyes was malicious. Now I know better. I know that she’s just as disgusted, and irritated with this whole process as everyone else is. Unlike the other girls, she is not seeking out Cal, she is seeking out the crown Elara is wearing. She’s seeking the safety of being queen, where no one will question Elane curling up by her side, and her father won’t be able to order her to do anything. She looks nothing like the woman I remember grabbing coffee with just a few days before I was chasing Giselle down a backstreet.

I wish she was that woman. That would make things so much easier.

Her father calls her name and her ability, and a moment later, I’m summoned to a box. My heart hammers in my chest as I pace down thin hallways to answer the call. Once I step into that box, my fate is sealed. I’m going to have to find something deep within myself. Jon had warned me though, had told me to find the strength to get through this. I have to have some faith. Not in him of course, but in myself. I learned that hard lesson at Corros.

As I gather plates and glasses, I keep my eyes on Evangeline on the screen. She prowls around, searching for something to work with. With a flick of her wrists, and iron studs on her jacket start to move. I can’t help but roll my eyes at the theatrics. And she claims that I’m dramatic. She sets to work destroying the arena while I make my way slowly but surely toward the biggest open space in the box I can find. If she doesn’t tilt the arena, then all of this is for nothing.

Evangeline never disappoints though.

The floor shifts underneath me, and I squeeze my hand into a fist at my side. Even though I know I’m going to be just fine in the next few seconds, it doesn’t mean I want to fall thirty feet into a force field. The box tips, and I force an exhale through my teeth. A body slams into me, and I let myself fall.

It’s a much shorter fall than I remember, so I hit the shield a lot harder than I want. Sparks fly across my skin, and I close my eyes. I feel like a battery getting recharged, and every volt of electricity that burns through me makes me feel whole. The shield wavers underneath me, and I only have a second to push to my knees and spit a curse before it fails completely. I fall the last twenty feet and curl up into a ball as I hit a pile of dust and sand. The blow doesn’t quiet knock the wind out of me, but it still leaves me stunned for a moment.

Shaking myself out as I try to climb to my feet, I glance up at Evangeline. I’d forgotten the look she’d given me the first time she saw me. The mix of terror, horror, and fear is startling. She never looks at me like that again, not even in the Bowl of Bones when I create a storm from nothing. Above us, the rest of the High Houses gasp and murmur.

I swallow as I glance around and then back at Evangeline who takes a tiny step back. I don’t have time to say anything this time, because she throws a hail of metal shards at me. I gasp and throw up a net of lightning to catch them. The shards shriek and burst apart a few feet away from me. I release the net and it explodes out, hitting the far wall behind Evangeline. She throws herself to the side to avoid being hit by any stray bolts.

I hadn’t been that close to hitting her the first time. I grimace, as she whips her head around to look at the hole in the wall before turning her eyes back to me. I would stamp my foot at my stupidity, if Cal’s father didn’t shout for the Sentinels. They bleed out of the shadows in the boxes, and I lick my lips for a moment, tasting the ozone from the shield on my skin. I dare a glance up at Cal who is trying his best to seem surprised by me. Drawing my lips in a tight line, I sprint for the hole in the floor. Just as gun fire explodes behind me, I drop into a slide and go feet first down the hole.

As soon as I hit the ground of the antechamber below, I start into a dead sprint. The cameras follow me, and every one I pass, I destroy. They explode like fireworks around me and rain sparks into the semidarkness.

I make it to the mirrored hall and pause for a second to take heaving breaths. My chest burns and my legs already ache. I dont have much time, but I need to start thinking of a plan—gun fire explodes over my head and I drop to a knee and cover my head as pits of the wall cut across my neck.

Two Sentinels come charging toward me. With a smirk, I charge them. They try to bring their guns up in time, but I drop to my knees and slide between the two of them and throw two well placed bolts of electricity into their hips as I go by. They collapse with a clang of metal, and I scramble to my feet, sprinting once more. At least the hallways are familiar enough to me that I don’t have to stop to think about where I’m going. I only hope that Cal’s memory is as good as mine.

I end up in a hallway, panting and a worried that I’ve taken a wrong turn somewhere. How far away is Cal? Had it been a mistake to knock out the cameras on my way here? Maybe that was how he’d found me last time.

Footsteps sound from the hall that connects to the one I’m in and spin into a defensive stance, lightning dancing in my hands. Cal comes around the corner though, his entire uniform askew. He catches himself on the wall and I drop my hands immediately. He approaches quickly and his bracelet sparks before a wall of fire encircles us, successfully obscures us from view.

He reached out for me, and I grab his arm panting, “Don’t have much time, the Sentinels.”

He nods his eyes scanning over my charred uniform. “Elara—”

“I can do this, just don’t knock me out.” I growl as I meet his eyes. There isn’t time for him to play hero or savior right now. He shakes his head quickly and says, “We’ll think of something else.”

“No time. And if you try to dissuade her, she’ll know something is wrong. Let me face her, trust me.”

He looks like he wants to argue more, but the sound of Sentinels shouting on the other side of the fire makes him whip his head around. I grab his cheek and force his eyes back to me. “Everything will be fine,” I assure him with a little smile. He looks even more uncertain, but his jaw tightens in understanding. I let my legs go limp, forcing him to catch me. Cradling me close to his chest he slowly lowers the wall of fire, whispering, “Be brave. I’ll see you soon.”

I let myself hold onto the image of his face for a second longer than I should, but if I do mess up with Elara, I want to at least remember those as his last words.

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if-found-return-to-gusu · 4 years

Text

Happy Birthday to Me pt 10

While he was gone, I kept dancing with A-Lian and making faces for her to giggle at. It worked quite nicely until she heard the obviously very familiar sound of her parents singing. Instantly deciding she was tired of her poor uncle’s antics in favor of wanting to be held by her mother (fair) I shuffled her along to the stage. She waddled the last few steps to her mom who immediately swooped her up. Jin Ling had already ascended to his rightful throne in his father’s arms again, his favorite place that evening it seems, and the two doting parents started to dance along with their song (which was, fittingly enough, “I wanna dance with somebody”. Pff)

Somewhere near the end of the song Lan Zhan finally came back with the promised sweets. He looked a bit concerned and mildly heartbroken to find that A-Lian was no longer with me. When he asked where she had gone I just pointed up to the almost obnoxiously perfect family picture on stage. (Obnoxious because of the peacock, and almost because Shijie is always perfect and never obnoxious.)

The king demanded that he get to sing a song so before they could be shuffled off the stage they were allowed to sing a rather off-key rendition of “twinkle twinkle little star” with A-Ling belting his little heart out and A-Lian babbling her best to follow along.

It was so adorable that I had to look at something else or I’d end up crying again. So instead I started poking at the cake that was still being held by the steadfast Lan Zhan.

I’d barely managed to shove a huge bite in my mouth when I felt a forceful yank, taking me away from my cake and my Lan Zhan! Unacceptable!

Turns out it was, of course, my darling little brother telling me it was my turn. RUDE

“YOu could have at least let me finish my cake, Asshole!” I grumbled at him once I was finally able to swallow the lump of frosting that had jammed my mouth shut.

(Gamby yelled at me to watch my language so close to the kids. Oops. Sorry Gamby)

I got shoved up on stage then despite my continued protests. SangSang asked me what I wanted to sing and after a moment of thought there really was no other choice for me.

Okay

I know it’s a meme.

Okay I get it. Alright? He-Man and lol and whatever. Haha. BUt for real,

“What’s Up” from 4 Non Blondes fuckig SLAPS okay?

And I’ve loved it WAY longer than it’s been a meme! Fuck you He-Man! (Yes I’m aware I used the meme in question on my blog once. I am a multi-faceted human being and am perfectly able to compartmentalize thank you).

So the song starts off pretty quiet but after a few seconds Gamby all of a sudden shrieked like an excited teenager and practically begged me to sing it too.

So obviously yes, right? I’m not gonna say no to a duet with Gamby!

Oh it was so FUN! We were both really hamming it up in the best way and sometimes barely even able to sing it because we were trying so hard not to laugh.

We had a stellar audience too, all looking comically enraptured by the song, swaying in time to the music. I think SangSang even pulled out a fake lighter ap on his phone to hold in the air as he swayed.

The song ended to energetic applause and we both took our bows dutifully before Gamby pulled me into another tight, tight hug.

“It’s our song,” she said in my ear. “I used to sing this to you when you were just a sprout!”

FUCK

Okay hold on.

Sorry the memory of it made me well up again.

So you have to understand. I have always LOVED this song. Not just, like, liked it or thought it was fun or anything. I LOVE this song. Like top 5 forever. Maybe even number 1. Just.

This song for me. It comforts me. I don’t remember anything from my early childhood but this song made me feel nostalgic. Safe. I found it when I was like… 15? 16? And just it was SO familiar.

It turns out that Gamby and Mom used to sing it together with me all the time. The feeling I was getting whenever I heard that song. It was her. And it was Mom. The feeling I get from that song is the feeling of being loved by my parents. With no expectations. Nothing to repay. Just pure love.

I don’t remember my mom. But I have that now. I have that feeling.

Okay

Okay I’m fine. I’ve blown my nose and we can carry on.

So I’d mostly re-composed myself by the time I found Lan Zhan again only to discover that he’d just stood there the whole time just…. Holding the cakes.

I freaked out a little due to my honestly a bit overly-emotional. I took the cakes away and set them aside so I could rub his arms while scolding him. (Did I really do that? Why?? Ugh I’m an idiot)

I told him he could have put the cakes on the table or something and that his arms must be tired! I think I just wanted an excuse to touch him more. But I was a bit high on adrenalynn and the liquor was still making me a little warm.

So I’m gonna blame it on that.

While I made a buffoon of myself, Jiang Cheng and Huaisang did a cover of Meatloaf’s Let me Sleep on It.

It was hilarious. They had taken the energy that had honestly started with “My Heart will Go On” and just cranked it all the way up to 11. It was so good to see Jiang Cheng just having FUN without having to worry what he looked like for once.

He always has to be on his best behavior. It must be exhausting.

But now, with Nie Huaisang playing the part of the overly-pushy love interest asking him to ‘love her forever’ and Jiang Cheng pleading for more time to consider back and forth. Ah it was amazing. I rested my head on Lan Zhan’s shoulder while I watched it, feeling pleasantly warm and just honestly so loved. It struck me again just how many people had come here just to celebrate me. I still can’t wrap my head around it.

I held Lan Zhan’s hand as I thought about it though, lacing our fingers together because I can and it’s free. I sighed after a while, just feeling so content. I told Lan Zhan as much and was rewarded by a hand playing idly with my hair.

“I’m glad you are,” he said. I could feel the words rumbling in his chest. “You deserve to be.”

I looked up at him then, all indignant because how dare he ruin a perfect moment by embarrassing me like that (he ruined nothing. I just like being dramatic). But then I realized just how close we were and my protests just kinda never found their way past my throat. I traced every feature of his perfect face with my eyes, longing to do it with my lips instead. The urge was almost tangible. For a second it almost felt like I might die if I didn’t press a kiss to every part of his face I could. His forehead. His nose. His cheeks. His eyelids. His chin. His lips.

I leaned forward a hair when he spoke and broke the spell.

Thank god.

I think he asked me why I was staring or something. It’s the only thing that made sense, but I didn’t really hear him due to the fuzzy static in my ears. I got up quickly lest I fall into a stupor again. Curse you Lan Zhan. Curse you and your perfect face. I looked around the room to find something to latch on to and my eyes fell upon the tragically under-utilized photo booth!

It was one of those fancy ones you see at all the weddings and big parties now-a-days. The kind that’s a huge mirror that you can write on and with like the props and stuff.

I immediately decided that there was nothing in the world I wanted more than to immortalize that frustratingly perfect face next to mine and I dragged him over to the photo booth.

We had already agreed we needed to fix our ‘lack of selfies together’ problem after all, didn’t we?

By the time we got here, we’d been beaten to the punch by the beautiful Wens. Wen Ning and Wen Qing were making funny faces in the mirror with A-Yuan and aaaah my heart!

I don’t think I’d EVER seen Wen Qing pull faces like that. I’m so glad I get to keep those photos forever. With that in mind I realized I couldn’t pass up an opportunity to be included! So naturally I photobombed! Well. More I bodily shoved them to the side to make room for me to starfish in front of them.

I suppose I should have anticipated the vicious crack to my head even if it was my birthday. Wen Qing’s finger snaps are murder!

Mortally wounded, I crawled my way back to Lan Zhan so that I might at the very least die in his arms.

I complained that Wen Qing was being mean because she was and that I was going to have a bruise on my forehead for the rest of the night! Mostly I just wanted to see if he would kiss it better for me.

Except.

He actually did.

;ADFJ;LKSDJF;AJKF;ASLJF;JF

WHY MUST MY PLANS ALL BACKFIRE ON ME???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Wei Ying.exe has stopped. Please wait while we reboot the system.

Would you like to submit an error report? Yes | No

Oh I must have been so red. I was still riding on that ‘It’s my birthday I do what I want’ feeling though and it spawned the following word vomit.

When he asked me if it felt better.

I told him

Yes

But.

“I think I need another kiss just to make sure. You wouldn’t want the birthday boy to be incapacitated for the rest of his party, now would you?”

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

AND OF COURSE LAN ZHAN WENT ALONG WITH IT AND KISSED THE SPOT AGAIN. BECAUSE HE ALWAYS INDULGES ME AND DOESN’T SEEM TO KNOW THAT HE SHOULDN’T BE ENCOURAGING ME LIKE THIS?!?!?!?

I heard the sound of the lovely Dr. Wen gagging behind me. Fair.

But then we were saved by my hero A-Yuan who ran up to hug Lan Zhan’s fucking anime legs and thanked him so sincerely for healing his Xian-Gege.

“You’re so right, A-Yuan! He’s great like that!” said, kneeling down to pat his back approvingly and ruffle his already party-ruffled hair.

Then I noticed that we had somehow managed to edge into the frame of the photo booth and the countdown to the next picture had started. I tried to warn Lan Zhan to get ready but turns out that was the WRONG action. He looked up at the exact worst possible moment so when the mirror showed us back our picture it showed me yelling, A-Yuan looking into space, and Lan Zhan’s face morphed into a hideous slug monster.

This set A-Yuan to giggling right away, claiming that his bunny gege was a monster!

Lan Zhan growled at him, playing along, which got me going.

LAN ZHAN. STOP. MAKING. ME. FEEL. THE. THING. I. AM. NOT. READY. TO. ADDRESS. YET.

FUCK

;LDKJFSA;LJKF;SKJDF;LKFJ;FLK

Lan Zhan is NOT allowed near kids anymore! My heart can’t take the strain!

To cover up my newest surge of emotion, I demanded we take some proper pictures!

Wen Ning, angel that he is, took A-Yuan away so we could have pictures with just the two of us. Lan Zhan looked ready to protest, so for the sake of my poor heart, I pressed the ‘picture’ button to distract him. I gave him an arrow that said ‘birthday boy’ on it, which we barely got pointing in the right direction in time, and grabbed a lovely handlebar mustache for myself while claiming to be DaGe and told him to smile.

Bless his soul he actually did. I don’t know how he manages to tolerate all my stupid antics. Somehow he always seems to be able to take me in stride while staying (mostly) unruffled. I should take lessons.

The picture came out perfect! ♥

So Naturally I demanded a million more.

We did a few with props and a few without. And some silly faces and some serious faces. And some faces that were so serious they circled back to silly. Lan Zhan was a real champ and went along with all my hijinks.

Then I remembered the tree incident that everyone yelled at me over.

If he catches me I’ll…..

That sentiment was so strong. I don’t even know how that thought ends. I’ll what?

I still don’t know.

This time I at least gave him some warning.

I told him to hold out his arms so I could jump into him in a much safer recreation of the tree yeet.

The picture snapped right as I landed in his arms and I remembered to look just in time so that I could grin at the camera and not Lan Zhan in an attempt to be slightly less obvious. When the picture came back though Lan Zhan was looking straight at me. Probably trying to make sure he didn’t drop me. But fuck.

I’m keeping that one in my wallet once we get them printed.

Apparently my leap got the attention of the rest of the party because suddenly EVERYONE was there. It was like a clown car with everyone squishing in to see how many of us we could fit in a single picture. Ah it was amazing. We grabbed some props for added panache and I managed to wrangle it so that Lan Zhan and I were still in the middle with all my friends and family squashed around us.

In a brilliant idea on how to save space, I decided that I should just get as close as possible to Lan Zhan and gave him a big fat smooch on his cheek. I was rewarded when I saw the end result with what had to be the best picture ever taken.

Nie Huaisang and Jiang Cheng had their hands in each other’s faces, trying to push each other out of frame, each of them barely managing to stay in the back corners of the picture.

Below them and to the left, DaGe was looking entirely too pleased to be squished in that close to Lan Xichen who was holding at least 7 different props and looking ecstatically excited. Wen Qing and Shijie were next to each other on the front right, holding A-Yuan and A-Ling respectively. The four of them were holding up peace signs, their faces all close together to try to fit in the picture.

Front Left was Jin ZiXuan with A-Lian, rubbing their noses together and looking admittedly adorable.

The front center had MianMian and Qin Su making innocent doll eyes at the camera, their hands laced together and their cheeks squished up against each other. Directly in the back center Gamby and Aunty Yi were imitating them perfectly.

To the middle right sat Wen Ning looking like he was just happy to be included. He’s such a sweetie.

And right in the center of all that commotion was myself and Lan Zhan. I was planting the most obnoxious kiss I could manage on his cheek and he was grinning like the sun.

Oh.

My God.

OH MY GOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

After celebrating the best picture ever made we all somehow managed to disentangle ourselves from each other, with many knocking elbows and a lot of laughter.

#wei wuxian #wei ying #mo dao zu shi #the untamed #cql #mdzs #Long Post #(Modern AU!)

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asphalt-cocktail · 5 years

Text

Inside Out

A/N: Well in honor of Tony Stark’s birthday being today I wanted to upload this fic I wrote for a request I had in my inbox for a Tony Stark X plus size!Reader. I honestly cant think of anything else to say my brain is pretty dead haha.

Warnings: Body image issues, fat shaming, angst, fluff, awkward first date, supportive Pepper, no spoilers

Word count: 2200ish

Pairing: Tony Stark x Plus size!Reader

Summary: Tony Stark’s assistant hasn’t had much luck with dates.

Request for @lilacprincessofrecovery

Masterlist

Submit a request or ask me a question or want to be tagged

Being Tony Stark’s assistant had some perks, like living arrangements and pay, but it also had some down falls like having to deal with the man child’s temperament and the fact that Tony watched damn near your every move. This included every time you got stood up which recently, seemed often. Once a week you would get all dressed up, hair done, full face painted, and go out to wait for your date at some nameless restaurant and wait… and wait… for hours for no one to show. Each night Tony would be waiting for you to come back and stay up making sure you were okay.

Today though, you insisted it was going to be different. Pepper sat with you while you blow dried your hair and filled in your eyebrows “So, tell me about this boy?” Pepper pressed, hoping for as much detail as possible out of you.

“Well his name is Jake and he is a CFO for some bank around here.” You answered, “We’ve been talking all week, I’m really excited, he doesn’t seem like the other guys.”

Pepper nodded her head, she hoped you were right. Seeing you heartbroken at least once a week was starting to chip away at her own heart.

“We are meeting at this Italian restaurant at 12 for lunch.” You said and puckered your lips, observing your lip line and making sure it was even and clean. You looked at your phone for the time, 11:30, time for you to leave. You quickly grabbed your jacket and purse “By Pepper! By Mr. Stark!” You called from the door and with that you were gone without another word.

At the restaurant you waited for 15 minutes before Jake met you at the table, so far it was going better than your last 5 dates. “Y/N?” He asked pulling the chair out.

You nodded your head “Yes! You must be Jake.” You said smiling sweetly. The two of you ordered a glass of wine and made pointless conversation. The same pointless conversation everyone makes on dates; where are you from, what are your hobbies, favorite movies, etc.

“So, where do you work?” Jake asked.

“I work for Stark Industries.” You were proud of where you worked, Mr. Stark had done so many amazing things within the last several years.

“Oh wow, that is such a great company to work for” He added enthusiastically, you knew but retorted a humble answer, “You know I think I am going to quick use the bathroom before the waiter comes back for our food.” He said, “I’ll be right back.”

You checked your phone, and aimlessly scrolled through your social media feed, waiting for your date to come back from his bathroom break. After about 15 minutes you looked around, and sighed, you had no idea what was taking him so long and texted him asking him if he was okay. Another 15 minutes passed and there was still no response and no sign of him. You packed up your things and threw a fist full of money on the table to cover the glasses of wine you sucked down at an ungodly rate while waiting and left. Your drive back home was spent with you blasting music and trying to hold back your tears after yet another failed date.

You were greeted with Tony’s smiling face “How did it-” he started but was cut off by you pushing past him and throwing your jacket and purse on the floor and storming off into your room.

You unknowingly shut the door in Tony’s face and sat on your bed, wondering what was wrong with you. A ping on your phone knocked you out of your thoughts, it was Jake. You didn’t know why you opened it, you should have just ignored his message, but for some reason you opened it curious as to why he just up and left.

Maybe he had an emergency?

You should really post full body pictures on your dating profile.

Was all the message said.

You felt you stomach drop as your face scrunched in pain and you threw your phone to the side. You knew this was why he stood you up, your body, you had always been a bigger girl, ample hips, plush thighs that touched, a stomach, this was why you couldn’t get a boyfriend.

You hadn’t even noticed the knocking at the door until you could hear Tony asking to be let in. You got up and shuffled to the door, Tony sighed seeing your disheveled state, lipstick half gone, mascara running down your face, nose red, and pulled you into a hug. You backed up and shut the door before you accepted his hug and leaned into his shoulder crying and leaving tear stains on his tee shirt.

“What happened?” He asked sitting down at the edge of your bed.

“He showed up this time, but he left before we even could order food.” You answered hiccupping and rubbing your eyes. “Then he sent me a message a few minutes ago saying I should post full body pictures on my profile.”

Tony looked at you in disbelief “All right. I want you cleaned and ready to go in the next hour. Wear that dress you wear to galas.” He said standing up. You looked at him, confused at what he was telling you, “Well come on, hurry up.” He said and leaving you standing there in disbelief.

Within the hour you had fixed your hair and makeup as best you could and waited for your boss down in the foyer wearing your best dress. Soon Tony wandered downstairs clad in a grey suit and sunglasses and walked out to where his car was waiting. He sped up to walk ahead of you and opened the door “Come on,” He said and ushered you into the seat. You looked around still confused at what was happening.

“Where are we going?” You asked once he was in the car and already on the road.

“A date.” His tone was very matter of fact.

You looked at him shocked “A date?” You asked, “You are taking me on a date?” You let out a somewhat bitter laugh.

Tony glanced at you with a puzzled expression, “I’m serious.” He said, “It seems like these guys don’t know how much of catch you are.”

Your face flushed, and you looked down at your feet “I don’t know about that. Maybe they’re right maybe I’m too fa-”

“I don’t want to hear you finish that sentence.” He said putting a hand up “You really have no idea how beautiful you really are, you’re just too much for these guys to handle, they don’t know what to do with all this woman.” You smiled but kept our eyes averted.

You kept a watch out your window and gasped when a five-star restaurant pulled into view. You knew Tony didn’t have reservations, but that didn’t matter when you were Tony Stark. No wonder he had asked you to dress up so nicely. Once again, he walked around and opened the door for you and allowed you to hold the crook of his elbow as he tossed his keys to the valet driver and within minutes the two of you were seated at a table with an amazing view of the city. You looked at the menu and frowned, everything on here was so expensive, way more than you could afford “Don’t worry about the cost I’m buying.” He said, “It’s a date remember?”

You nodded your head, almost forgetting how these things worked after dealing with so many shitty dates. You didn’t know what to say “So, I scheduled the appointments for next week,” Naturally business was the first thing to leave your mouth.

Tony shook his head “This isn’t a lunch meeting, Y/N, I’m taking you on date.” He added putting his menu down and looking at you “What are your hobbies, where are you from? I want to know about you, you’ve worked with me for 5 years now and I don’t really know anything about you.”

You nodded your head, he was right, you knew almost everything about Tony down to what his favorite shampoo brand was “Well, I grew up just outside the city with my parents, I went to college for PR and I enjoy painting.” You continued, on and on, describing your family and college along with anything else that came to mind. The entire time he seemed genuinely interested, which was not something you were used to.

Tony nodded his head taking in all the information you told him and burying it in his vast mental bank “You like art?” He asked, “Have you ever been to the Metropolitan museum of Art?”

You sighed, out of all of your years living in New York, you had never once been to the Met “No… I haven’t.” You said sounding disappointed.

“Well then, we have our next date picked out then.” He said smiling.

You looked at him shocked “Our next date?” You asked, “I thought this was like a one-time thing…” you forced yourself to think of it as a one-time thing, a pity date for all the times you’ve been stood up, you didn’t want the disappointment of getting your hopes up for a second date.

Tony furrowed his brows “Y/n” He said, his gaze was intense “I am taking you on a date because I like you.” It was very much Tony’s style to bypass most formalities and get straight to the point “I see you come home ever week, one guy after another, breaking your heart and I can’t stand seeing it anymore.”

You sighed in relief as the waiter conveniently came to take your order before you could manage an answer, you looked at your menu and quickly scanned it as Tony made small talk with the young man taking your order. A grandiose picture of a steak with mashed potatoes and gravy, all the fixings caught your eyes, and you looked down at yourself and at Tony, back at the picture, then back at yourself and felt a surge of guilt push through you. Guilt for wanting to eat this glorious spread of food, you’ve eaten enough food today, you thought to yourself as you turned the page back to the salads and appetizers. You let out a puff of air “I’ll take a cobb salad.” You said smiling softly.

Tony arched his brow “What are you a rabbit?” He asked in a joking manor.

You shrugged your shoulders “I don’t know, I mean I had a big lunch…” you said trailing off

Tony handed back his menu to the waiter “Go on sweetheart, treat yourself today.” He said smiling slyly.

Your face flushed “Well…” You thought for a minute, thinking about what you had for lunch, oh right it was a nice big helping of tears and wine because you got stood up. “The steak dinner, rare?” You asked the waiter, he smiled and wrote down your order and refilled the two glasses of wine and went off.

The remainder of your dinner with Tony went very well, you two made small talk and were both surprised how little you knew about each other. Upon your arrival back to the compound Tony walked you back to his room, he sauntered by your side with his hands in his pockets, trying to act coy “When are you free next?” He asked.

You laughed “Well, I’m your assistant so I guess I should be asking you that…” You trailed off leaning against your door.

“Right…” Tony said trailing off “How about next weekend?” He asked “After the meeting with the marketing department?”

“So, Saturday at 11?” You asked, your mind was racing, you hadn’t been on a proper date in so long, how was he going to say good bye? Was he going to kiss you? Was he going to hug you? Give you a firm handshake?

“Yes, 11. Wear your walking shoes, we’re going to go to the Met.” He said and smiled, unsure on how to end things with you, he was never good at saying goodbye to people. So, he turned your head to the side and placed a lingering kiss on your cheek, it was sweet and simple and made your face flush. “Y/N,” Tony started, “As long as we are together, I don’t want you to ever feel less than, you are beautiful.”

You held his gaze, no man had ever complemented you so much in one night, let alone treated you this well, you didn’t know how to handle it “Thank you.” You said “I’m sorry, I don’t know how to handle complements.” You said looking down and playing with the ends of your hair.

A grin spread across Tony’s face as he looked at you, he loved the way your cheeks flushed and your eyes darted around nervously whenever he complemented you, it would take a while but Tony would make sure you would feel as beautiful on the inside as you did on the outside

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yuyuuuuuuuuuuu · 4 years

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Apology

Dear Gagan,

I hope this letter gets to you safely.

I am full of regret. I am in pain. And have been in pain every day since we got back together when I left you. Because of the injury, the misery I caused you, because of the distance ... because I could not hug you and make you physically FEEL the love I have for you. To wake up and say Morni to you in person, kiss you in the cheek then put my arms around you and stay lazy bum for a few minutes in bed, smelling your long hair that would be in my face while we spoon together in bed for a little while before getting up.

For me, not being able to give you that type of love hurt me more than anything. And I carried that pain every day. It made me sad. Sad that I was unable to heal your wounds, our wounds. Heartbroken that we still had to endure the long-distance. So I hurried and rushed I was not thinking of priorities, I was not smart. I became selfish with my pain and wanted to make things right. I booked a ticket to travel over there as soon as possible and see you. With the mentality that I would fix everything, and we know how that turned out.

I did not close the chapters fully when I contacted you. I was dealing with many emotions at the time. The therapist I was seeing could see that I was trying to make sense of everything. And at the same time, I was denying that I made a mistake in leaving you. I could not make my self bear that truth. But with more and more visits to the therapist, I started to realize that I made the worst decision of my entire life. And that I would be regretting it my whole life. I started panicking. I began to feel like you felt when I left. The therapist told me not to contact you until I was better. I asked her why did I regularly create so much pain in us when all I wanted was to love you. That is when she told me that it's because I never knew what love is, so I could not or was not able to give something I never learned and saw how to give. I became desperate to find you. Instead of finishing my therapy, close the chapter I was in, resolve some feelings I had, and move on from my hurt ego, I instead followed my selfish emotions. It was not because I felt lonely, but because I realized the REAL love we had. I began to confront the realization of my mistake for the first time since I had left you.

I went on the trip to see you and fix everything I had done in life, I thought. But when I arrived, we soon discovered something was off, and it became clear nothing was okay. I had trouble trying to understand how to make you happy. The relationship was not in good condition, and my emotions were not in the right place. I did not know what to do ... Precisely as my therapist had foretold. You could see and feel the disturbing aura as days went by, I tried but had no idea what to do, how to give you love. Things kept getting worse with the mistakes I made there as well. To top it off, I still hadn't fully closed my past chapter. My ego was still hurting. But I knew I loved you more than anything. I was feeling pretty scared going alone to get a tattoo, But I had worked on it for a month putting love into it, my love for you in it. Yes, the situation of the relationship made me doubt to put your name in it. But I knew I wanted it there no matter what. It was so stupid of me to pretend I was going to get a good reaction from you, especially at the time and place we were in, but that's me, a retard who doesn't know how to love, but in love. In the end, the whole thing was very depressing, and I gave up. It was so painful, I caved in and did the only thing I knew what do do when in pain, and it was to try to ignore it. I grabbed my laptop started playing a game, watching videos. All I knew was that the relationship was not working out. I wish you could see the pain that I was in because I know the pain you were in, I could see it. After I came back from India, I felt de-motivated with my self. I kept saying to myself repeating over and over, "I was there with her, and look all that I did; Nothing" Just more hurt. I still repeat that in my head, over and over. I will never forgive myself for all the pain. But this trip in specific I will always feel remorse because of the way I acted and behaved.

Once I came home, we talked about it, and I apologized and begged for you to forgive me. I know that I love you, Gagan. It has always been like that. We talked, and you said you felt stuck over there so I started to move and do the paperwork for the K1-visa. I Printed everything, bought a book, read it, followed it, created documents, we got everything ready. Then we hit a snug, the letter. We got stuck there because you had to write your letter stating the intent to marry me.....I don’t know if you remember but ...I did mine, here it is;

Re: I-129F, Petition for Alien Fiance Letter of intent to Marry Petitioner: Joel R****** Beneficiary: Gagan*** *** ***

Dear Sir or Madam, I am the Petitioner, Joel R******. My alien fiancee Beneficiary, Gagan*** *** ***, and I respectfully submit this Letter of Intent to Marry as proof that I intend to marry Gagandeep Kaur Gill within 90 days after the approval of the K-1 Fiancé Visa. Being far apart from my love and darling has created anguish and sadness in my heart. Every day that I go without Gagan**** by my side becomes empty and more agonizing as the days pass by. I am deeply thankful with life for meeting her and even more grateful to have her as my fiance and partner. I am truly the happiest person to know she would have me as her husband.

Please find attached the following supporting documents as further evidence of our impending marital ceremony:

I understand why you got stuck there. So far, I had just shown you pain and misery for the most part. There was love, but the mistakes outweigh the love I was giving. So it was probably hard to write the letter. We also got stuck there because you had to send the letter to me. Since it had to be signed personally by you, I believe that hit us hard because we knew it would make things even longer. I was trying to give you time and not pressure you. I didn't want to keep asking you over and over for the letter. I instead focus my energy on adding more evidence for our intent of marrying each other, and I thought Pratick could take pictures at our wedding. I asked him about it, he agreed to it. I even found a document/agreement form that he could sign, and we could add to our documents.

...But one day turned into two, and two into three before we knew it, quite some time had passed, and the whole CODIV-19 suddenly starting to happen. We became more worried about each other's health and well being, our families, and what would happen in our countries. We also realized that our K1-Visa process came to a halt. That affected us. It affected me. I remember walking towards the living room where my stepfather and mother were at that moment, and I told them, "I will be going to India" They both looked at me like I was crazy. I was going to drop everything in my life and just go be with you. I had no idea how bad it was going to get, But I did not want to be away from you during those times. If something happened to you, I would die. I needed to be there in case you needed me, in case you got sick, or they locked the countries for years. I could care less about my job or money my brain and heart were telling me to leave, and be with you, protect you, love you. Parents talked to me, you spoke to me, and I calmed down. But here we are, in this limbo of situation.

At first, I thought we were doing fine. But I was stupid for thinking like that. I had numerous issues, and you even asked me to write a letter with all the stuff that I was doing that was hurting you. I wanted to do it ...But I did not even know where or how to start. Maybe it was also because I didn't want to meet the monster I am, I did not want to face how much I've hurt you. Days kept going, I became complacent and forgot about doing the letter I started and kept pushing the excuse in my head that I was waiting for you to make the K1-visa letter for us to move forward.

All this time I was ignoring my other thoughts and emotions as well. Like I said before, I left the therapist without even feeling better or finishing the therapy. My ego was hurt, and I was still bothered by it. This COVID-19 made me us all be more closed off, fewer distractions in life, and it made me confront my damaged ego. Thoughts started to appear in my head, but I pushed them away, it was not a big deal. But every time I felt wrong about myself the thoughts of her kept coming up, and I didn't understand why I mean I liked her Gagan, but I never loved her nor I have feelings for her at all. But there she was bothering me in my head. All this time, it was my ego which was correlated to my emotional state, and that would trigger it. Then a few weeks ago you started to talk suicidal, and that was the worse feeling ever because it confirmed what I already knew, I guess, which was, that I was doing a poor job as a partner. And it's true, could indeed have been doing more every day of every minute to show you, my love, to be working towards each other, etc. I got complacent, waiting.

I realize this, and got up one day and told you; Gagan, I had enough I want to be with you, what needs to be done, why aren't we advancing. I started making some changes in my life and committing to them. For example, my Addiction to masturbation since I stopped, I haven't looked back... I set up a date with my sister for her to come by so we could take the picture and video. I bought a folder so I can create our package, not any folder, a folder to keep forever with us. I was fully invested in moving the wheels of our relationship. But I was still not realizing that I have a sack of problems that I have to address in me. But I try... and one of those things was my ego, Gagan ...I was trying to understand why she keeps popping in. I wanted her absolutely gone. I did NOT want to repeat the same mistake when I visited you last time of not fixing myself and not being one with my heart and brain. I wanted to give my all. ALL OF IT, every single gram of thought and sweat, every inch of effort of love is what I wanted to give when I saw you again. I needed to do something, and I was trying. Most of my conclusions concluded with me needing to get closure and that I never finalized that chapter. I did not know how I was going to do that. A few days ago I saw a phone number in my DUO app and realized it might be hers. I thought this was the way I could finally end this! I didn't know how to go on about it. So I just message her without thinking much or expecting much. I said what I wanted to say, I wish I could of said it in person and I tried to be as honest as possible, not for her, but for me to just finally leave it there and forget about this forever. After that, I deleted her contact info in Duo as well

Now... I realized that I should have done things differently. Maybe I could have gotten a therapist I don't know. What I do know is, that it did work. But it created another problem within me, which was us. I didn't want to hide things from you. You know everything about me, and I wanted to keep that transparency and honesty. Especially going forward with this new person that I was and I am trying to be. I needed to tell you.

So I grabbed all my guts and courage. And I told you. I was just trying to be honest with you. I did not want to hide things from you. After that, you wanted the whole message, and I was not %100 honest with you about what I wrote in the text message because I was getting scared I became afraid of how things were going, how you would just take it the wrong way, not understanding that I needed to do that.

I am sorry. Forgive me. I understand that I started to change my ways too late. I wish I was better to you long ago. I wish I was smart enough to be able to recognize that my ego was hurt and I wish I would have given you enough love where I would felt confident and open to be able to talk to you about it with no issues, knowing deep that we both love each other no matter what. But it was not like that.

Every day I would wake up knowing that all I want is to be is with you and asking life why aren't we together yet, and damning the pandemic, instead of working on my self, on my being. You made me always discover my faults that I never knew were there etc. I have been manipulating in the way I say some things, Gagan, but with good reasons behind them. With reasons of loving you, not losing you. I am not excusing anything I have done. Everything is bad. I am bad. But the only intention was to be with you and not lose you. It was to be with you, respect you, and love you. But I was weak, afraid, dumb.

Right now, my life looks like nothing. There's nothing. The only thing I have is hope. Please, Gagan, don't do this. Do not remove me from your life. I beg you I plead to God to please show me the way. I never wanted to hurt. I see what I have to do now. It is not like times before, where I know what I did wrong but not knowing what steps I should be taking ahead. Today I know what must be done. I can't be weak, I have to put effort * every day not just in the relationship but on everything around me to better my self for you. I need to be attentive in MANY ways. I need to learn many things... and fix many more. I told you one day that I thought I was narcissistic, and I should get help. You said I wasn't, and I believed you. Now you see that you were partially wrong. I might not be entirely one, but I do have narcissistic tendencies that I have to work on.

Please do not give up on me.

I'm getting help. I'm getting a therapist I've already contacted someone. Please, Gagan, my love for you has no limit. I know that you can't see that right now at all, but it does not mean you won't ever see it... I am sorry for being retarded, slow in recognizing things, and understanding situations. I AM SORRY FOR BEING FLAWED. I don't EVER plan to leave/forget you from my heart. No matter what. Gagan, please acept my apology, please forgive me. I love you

Every day I felt and feel bad mainly because of the hurt I had created in you. I would wake up every day wishing I could be close to you, thinking of ways I could make you laugh and make you happy, make you smile... I did not know how else to give love. I AM SORRY. EVERYTHING CHANGES FROM NOW ON. It did not start changing today or yesterday. I actually started changing that day I was talking to you were you thought I was high, I was talking to you about how I felt different my focus was on us, our happiness, your happiness.

I understand there are consequences to my actions. Trust me, I know I will be in pain every day of my life because of every mistake I made with you, with us. I understand that I have been making you wait over there, that you feel like you haven't accomplished anything. I am sorry. I am sorry I was born over here. I am sorry for prolonging our path with my flawed being, and in the process generating mistakes after mistakes. I am sorry, Gagan. Please understand that I was NEVER using you. EVER. I wanted to be with you always. that has never changed and it never will.

I am not asking for another chance I do not deserve anything from you. I do plead to you, do NOT remove me from your life. You are everything to me. Please.

If you go away from my life I will have NOTHING. You are and will be the love of my life. Always. I want to earn every single love, affection, words, and moments with you. I want to show you why you're the love of my life, why you so perfect to me, why in my eyes when I see you, all I see is life, happiness, peace. Do not give me anything Gagan, Let me start from zero. Let me work for your attention, for your love, for the right to be with you, for the privilege to be by your side, and In return, you will get a lifetime of my love, happiness, and joy. My unconditional love towards you that you always deserve. Which you continuously had and will eternally have. There's nothing you can do that will stop me from loving you.

Our souls have and are truly connected. I am sorry that mine is, crumbled up, mistreated, and torn. You deserve a better me, please do not go... Do not remove me from your life.

Do not let go of me. Don't let me fall.

Try and remember our sincere moments of happiness, joy, the care, the genuine love we had. I can do better, Gagan, for you, for us. We have had good memories, few and stretched far apart, but we have had them, and the genuine love is there, a love that we will never have with anyone else and that I don't want to have with anyone else but you. A beautiful thing comes to mind, something that we do... I love how we used to give each other love by making those doggie yawning sounds with our mouth closed like we are acknowledging each other's love and saying I love you at the same time. I'm not sure how to describe it. But it's so beautiful when our love blooms and shines. It is that kind of love that we will not find anywhere else in this world. It's our souls guguni, our souls playing and loving each other. I understand you have a lot of emotions right now, resentment, anger, hatred towards me. I deserve them and more. But please, Gagan, do not cut me off. Whatever your plans are whatever you want to do today go for it, I will follow you no matter what. I will work to win your love if you permit so.

Please read this, and read the letter I made for us. And think about it. Please see some pictures of us, any... Then tell me.

Forgive me, Gagan My love is yours eternally <-(click) Sincerely, Joi, Monku, putu, Joel...

It all started here.. Please dont give up on me...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=293I79j9_No

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noona-clock · 6 years

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Moonrise 🌚 I Need Somebody

A Day6 songfic series by Admin B. 💟 Enjoy!

Genre: AU/Angst

Pairing: BFF Jae x You

By Admin B

Better Better 🌚 I like you 🌚 What Can I Do 🌚 I’ll Remember 🌚 Whatever! 🌚 Be Lazy 🌚 Hi Hello 🌚 I Loved You 🌚 When You Love Someone 🌚 All Alone 🌚 Pouring 🌚 I Need Somebody 🌚 I’ll try

Hello there, is anyone there? Where is Is there anyone to answer me? Is anyone there?

“Jae, please pick up,” you murmured, your voice getting more and more desperate the longer his phone rang. “Please.”

And then you heard his voicemail.

Your heart sank, and tears began to form in your eyes.

Once you heard the beep, you took a deep breath, willing yourself to speak clearly even though the tears were starting to stream down your cheeks now. “Jae,” you sniffed. “Please call me back. I really need to talk to you. I just had a huge fight with him, and I need my best friend. ...Please.”

You didn’t care if you sounded pathetic. You really did need your best friend. And that was Jae.

You’re disappearing, more and more, without a sound From me, without any reason Was everything a misunderstanding? Were we looking at each other in a dream?

As the minutes ticked by, you tried not to stare at your phone and wait for Jae to call you back... but you did. And the minutes turned into an hour... two hours... three hours.

So you broke down and called him again.

He hadn’t told you about any plans he’d had today, and usually, the two of you talked about everything.

So why wasn’t he answering you? He’d always been able to know when you needed to talk to him, especially when it was about your boyfriend -- well, maybe soon-to-be ex-boyfriend was the most accurate term.

But, still. Jae was always there for you. Through thick and thin.

You heard his voicemail yet again, and you honestly felt like throwing your phone against the nearest wall.

Why am I alone? Among all the people surrounding me Why am I alone? I’m all alone, I need someone I need someone right now

Of course, if it ended up that Jae was in a meeting or seeing a movie with other friends, you would feel terrible. Even more terrible than you already did.

But, as it were, you were furious and heartbroken and devastated.

After leaving him a second voicemail, you curled up in your bed, pulling the covers up over your head and letting yourself cry as much as you needed. You were losing your boyfriend, you were quite sure of that, but were you also losing your best friend?

What would you do without Jae?

What would you do without his lame jokes that never failed to make you roll your eyes and laugh? What would you do without his random bouts of wisdom that never failed to make you put things into perspective and remember what was truly important in life? What would you do without your ‘let’s go out for Taco Bell at 1 am’ partner-in-crime?

Your face was buried in your pillow, your tears staining the fabric as sobs wracked your body.

But then the sound of your ringtone pierced through the air.

You didn’t want to reach for your phone immediately, but you did. Because you were lower than low right now, and even though you were upset with Jae, you still needed to talk to him.

Hello, is anyone there? Anyone who can accept me? Is anyone here?

Come to me, without a sound Hold me, without a reason

“Hey,” you sniffed once you answered his call.

“What’s up?” he asked, his voice a bit cold and distant.

“We had a fight. A big one, and I think it might be over, and I need you.”

“...You need me? Shouldn’t you be trying to talk it out with him?”

“You know how he gets. I don’t want to talk to him, I want to talk to you. Jae, please come over.”

You heard him let out a sigh, and... honestly, you were kind of confused. Whenever you asked him to come over like this, he always said ‘Okay, I’ll be right there’ almost immediately.

Why was he hesitating now?

“Please, Jae,” you whispered.

You felt pathetic, but right now, you didn’t care.

As I am keeping my silence I’ve let everyone go A siren rings in my head I really don’t think this is right

As I am keeping my silence I’ve let everyone go Oh, now I got to do something

Jae closed his eyes, pressing his lips together because he knew he was about to break your heart. But he couldn’t keep doing this to himself. He couldn’t keep this to himself any longer. He had to break his silence.

“I can’t,” he told you. “I can’t be the person you cry to when your dumbass boyfriend hurts you. Because he always hurts you. You said you think it’s over between you two? Well, good. It should’ve been over months ago, and you don’t know how frustrating it’s been for me to just sit back and watch you let him keep hurting you. You know you deserve better than him. I don’t need to tell you that, because you know it. You deserve someone who will know what he’s got when he’s got it. Someone who will appreciate you for the beautiful, kind, smart, caring person you are. And I know you need someone right now, but it can’t be me. I refuse to watch you do this to yourself. It hurts me, too, did you ever think about that? Because, unlike that jerkface, I care about you. I love you. And all you do is use me as a pillow or a punching bag. I can’t do that anymore.”

“Jae, what --”

“When you’re ready to be brave enough to be single instead of being with some piece of trash, call me again. And I do love you, Y/N. Truly.”

He hung up before you could say anything else, and the tears he’d heard you crying were now filling up in his own eyes.

Because he did love you. More than you knew. And he really, really hoped he hadn’t just pushed you away forever. But a relationship with you wouldn’t be possible unless you realized everything that was wrong with this whole situation and fixed it yourself.

But... damn, he already missed you.

I need someone right now

Master list // RULES // Submit a Request! // Read About the Admins

#day6 #day6 scenarios #day6 imagines #day6 au #day6 angst #jae #jaehyung #park jaehyung #jae scenarios #jae imagines #jae au #jae angst #kpop #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines #kpop au #kpop angst #admin b

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stressa-bessa · 6 years

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Taco Thursday

Prompt #24 “What on earth are you wearing?”

Submitted by the wonderful @prince-p-parker for my 100 follower celebration, please go give them a follow!

You can submit a prompt or suggestion here as the celebration runs till November 5th!

My prompt list is here!

Peter Parker x Reader

Fluff!

Word count: 2282

“Alright class, I guess that is the end of our lesson today. Please don’t forget that your Spanish presentations are on Monday!” The teacher shouts over the sound of the ringing bell and the shuffling of papers and desks.

“Hey, Y/N!” Peter Parker yells as he walks up to you from the back of the class. “Would you want to come over tonight to work on our Spanish presentation?” He blushes lightly, tightening his grasp on his copy of Don Juan.

“Sure thing, Pete. Do you not have to go to your internship?” You laugh, curious as to how Peter can balance his courses and the Stark Internship.

“Nah, Mr. Stark told me school first after all the craziness from last year.” Peter smiles as laugh lines form on his cheeks.

“Alright, sounds like a plan. I can meet you after school, by the lockers?”

“Yes! That’s perfect.”

“Alright, see you later, Pete.” You smile, giving him a wave as you walk out of the classroom.

You had known Peter for ages as you had attended the same middle school in Queens. The both of you had been accepted into Midtown on a scholarship and from the first day of grade 9, you had become close friends.

It wasn’t hard to be around Peter. He was fantastic company and always made sure he walked you home, even though his apartment was 3 blocks closer to the subway than yours. When your dad had gotten sick half way through your first year, Peter was there. May was constantly sending casseroles and Peter would always show up at school with two sets of homework, the one he did for himself and the extra for you. He would always say it was nothing and that he had changed a few of the answers so you wouldn’t get caught, except he would change the answers in his homework, so you would get the better grade.

After your dad had passed away, Peter knew how to comfort you. He would just hold you when the grief and tears would creep up on you. Once the dust had settled after the passing of your father, you realized that maybe there could be more there between you and Peter. More than just friendship. There was something about his big, brown eyes and the freckles that sprinkled his cheeks that took your breath away.

At the beginning of your third year, you noticed a change in Peter. As if he had filled out and gotten hot overnight. You did your best not to notice the way his shirt would cling to his abdomen, or how tight the sleeves of his once baggy tee shirts were bursting at the seams around his biceps. You always did your best to conceal these feelings as Peter was your best friend. You told each other everything.

One night, the two of you were at his apartment studying for a chemistry final when Peter brought up homecoming. The second those words left his lips, you got butterflies. Was Peter going to ask you to be his date?

“Yeah, I want to ask this girl, but I don’t know how.” He sighs, shutting his textbook as he admits defeat.

“What’s stopping you?”

“Well, I don’t want to ruin a friendship or make it weird. I don’t want to seem like the freak who goes out of his league, you know?”

You could feel your cheeks grow hot. It had to be you, right?

“Peter, anyone would be happy to go with you! Just ask her, who is it!” You beam, the butterflies in your stomach grow and become more persistent.

“Liz, Liz Allen from our English class.” He smiles, a cheery blush growing on his cheeks.

You could feel the pit of your stomach drop. You tried your best to conceal the disappointment on your face but, how could you? You were heartbroken.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?” Peter asks quickly, a concerned look forming across his brow.

“Nothing, nothing, Pete. You know? I should probably get going. It’s getting late and I need some sleep before the test tomorrow.” You say lightly, pressing your lips together in a firm line.

“It’s only 7:30…?” Peter questions, running a hand through his soft, brown curls.

“I had to get up early for band today, I’m pooped.”

“Uh, okay, yeah. Let me get my coat and I can walk you home.” He says as he stands up from his bedroom floor.

“Nah, I’ll be okay, Pete. You have a good night, okay?”

“Y/N, seriously. Let me walk you home.” Peter persists, grabbing your hand in the process. His touch sent your heart into a frenzy. The way his gaze pierced into yours made you weak in the knees.

“Peter, I’ll be okay.” You whisper as you pull your hand away and open his bedroom door.

“Let me know when you get home at least?” He asks as you walk out his front door.

You had briskly walked back to your apartment, tears streaming down your face as you angrily texted MJ about the events that took place this evening. You vowed that you would bury these feelings and just focus on yourself and your friendship, so, that is exactly what you did. From that day forward, you hid your feelings and pretended they didn’t exist. It was better like that, anyways. Less drama, less pain, you had already dealt with a life time of both.

The sound of a locker slamming shut drew you from your thoughts. Quickly grabbing your English books, you shut your locker and walk briskly down the halls to your last class of the day.

----------------------------

The bell signifying the end of day rang in your ears. The teacher put down her copy of Hamlet and excused the class, wishing everyone a happy evening. You hurried along the halls to get to your locker. You were looking forward to hanging out with Peter. The beauty of having to do an aural presentation meant that you could see Peter come out of his shell.

You grabbed your things from your locker and took a quick look in the magnetic mirror that hung on the door of your locker. Fixing your hair, you smile and shut the door. As you leaned against it, you pulled out your phone and texted Peter. Maybe he was still stuck in class?

Your phone vibrated gently.

Pete🔬: Running behind! Meet me at my place!

With a sigh you commenced your march to Peter’s apartment, classic Peter always showing up late.

Meanwhile….

Peter was twiddling his thumbs in algebra, praying for the bell to ring so he could hang out with you. His favourite part of the day was when the two of you would walk home from school. The laughs and good times you’ve shared are precious memories to Peter.

Tonight, he wanted to invite you for dinner and talk about the elephant in the room. Peter realized that he had messed up last year. MJ had screamed at him after the Homecoming dance when he hadn’t shown up for either Liz or you. That was when he realized that he had been ignoring his feelings for you. Getting to rehearse this intimate scene from Don Juan would give him the perfect change to spend an intimate moment with you, and hopefully he would be able to find the courage to apologize and right his wrongs.

His phone buzzed in his pocket, drawing his attention away from the pigeon that was flying around outside.

Aunt May🌻: Still on for Thai tonight?

Peter: Shoot! I forgot to tell you, Y/N is coming for dinner. We must practice for a Spanish presentation.

Aunt May🌻: ahh…Tacos?

Peter: Tacos 😇

With a smile and light chuckle, Peter tucks his phone away. He swiftly copies the equation off the board and adds it to his pile of notes.

Another buzz pulls his attention from the lesson.

Mr. Stark: Spiderling, we need back up

In seconds Peter gathered his things and jumped out of his seat, muttering some lame excuse as he ran out of class.

---------------------------

Your feet carried you up the steps to Peter’s front door, your then knuckles wrapping softly at the wooden door. The door creaks open slowly to reveal Aunt May in a sunflower apron.

“Hello, Y/N!” She smiles, greeting you with a big hug.

“Hey, Aunt May. It smells delicious in here!”

“Taco Thursday, as per Peter’s request.” She giggles, as she holds you by the shoulders, her gaze examining your face. “You look more and more like your mother every day! It’s been ages since I’ve seen you around here!” Aunt May beams as she walks back to the kitchen.

“Oh yeah, just super busy with extracurriculars. Trying to beef up my resume for college, you know?” You laugh awkwardly, as you lean against the kitchen counter. In truth, you had been avoiding this apartment since the day Peter had told you about Liz and homecoming.

“Peter is always swamped with the Stark Internship! I swear, I never see that boy anymore…I’m not so sure that I am a fan of that Tony Stark. I think he pushes Pete too far.” May explains in a concerned tone.

“Speaking of, is Pete here?”

“Uh, he should be in his room. I thought I heard him come in the door.” She smiles, “Go a head into his room! I’ll call you kids when dinner is ready.”

“Oh okay, let us know if you need help!” You reply as you turn and walk into Peter’s room. You open the door and find a strange man crawling through Peter’s bedroom window.

The second you opened your mouth to scream, the man’s gloved hand covers your mouth while the other shuts the door swiftly.

“Shh shh, it’s me, Y/N!” the figure hisses, pulling off his mask.

It was Peter. Wait- it was Peter? What the hell?!

“Peter?! What on earth are you wearing?” a nervous giggle escapes your lips as you pull on the crazy costume he was wearing.

“You have to promise me you won’t tell a soul.” Peter whispers, a panicked look in his eye.

“Peter, of course.” You reply, squeezing his hand tightly.

“Okay, the Stark Internship is this. I’m Spider-man, and Tony builds my suits and I help fight crime.”

“Wait- You’re Spider-man?”

“Yeah, kinda.” Peter laughs, running a hand through his messy hair.

“Wow, that explains so much.” You reply, flopping onto his bunkbed. “So, in Washington…that was you?”

“Yeah, it was.”

“And homecoming-“

“About homecoming.” Peter interrupts. “Look, before we get into this, I want to apologize for homecoming. I was dumb and didn’t realize that I had hurt you so deeply.” He says as he takes your hands in his, his big brown eyes staring into yours.

“Peter, it’s fine-“

“Liz, wasn’t worth the risk of losing you or our friendship. I am so sorry that I am such an idiot that I couldn’t see what was right in front of me. I was going to wait to tell you after we had practiced our Spanish presentation, but…whatever. Look, I like you, like a lot, Y/N. And I am so sorry I fucked it all up because I was dumb, and ignorant, and cocky, especially after becoming Spider-man.”

“Peter, it’s okay, it’s all water under the bridge-“

“No. It’s not okay. I hurt my best friend. I was really annoyed with MJ, for weeks, but eventually I realized that I was being a jerk and I’m sorry. I totally get it if you aren’t into me anymore, and if that’s the case please pretend that I never said any of this.” He sighs, rubbing his eyes with his hand.

You stood there dumbfounded. A years-worth of emotions starting to bubble in your chest while Peter’s deep, brown eyes burned holes in your forehead.

“Peter, I like you too.” You smile, the butterflies starting to return in your tummy.

Peter walks forward, closing the gap between the two of you. His hand slowly reaching for your cheek.

He leans down and presses his lips onto yours. Peter’s lips tasted sweet like bubble gum, drawing you in to kiss him deeper.

A soft knock at the door pulled the two of you apart.

“Dinner’s ready!” May’s voice chimes from Peter’s door.

“I’m going to change, I’ll meet you out there?” Peter smiles, tucking a curl behind your ear.

“Sounds like a plan. Better not get too distracted, Parker. We have mucho work to do!” You giggle as you slip out of his room, giving Peter the chance to change in private.

The fiesta that Aunt May prepared was an absolute delight. You could see the joy in her eyes as the three of you giggled over making tacos and trying to name all the types of food that start with the letter T.

Once dinner was over, you and Peter retreated to his room to rehearse your scene from Don Juan. Unfortunately, Peter hadn’t listened to you earlier and got way too distracted.

“I just can’t help it, I’m sorry.” Peter smiles, placing another soft kiss on your lips.

“But we need to practice, Pete!” You giggle, trying to wrestle out of his embrace.

“That just means you will have to come over again tomorrow, and the next day, and the next day.” Peter jokes, placing a kiss on your face between words.

“Oh, Peter. What am I going to do with you?” You giggle, caving into his affection and placing a big kiss on his lips.

A/N: I hope you like it! Thank you so much for submitting a prompt! If you would like me to fix or change something, please let me know! :)

taglist: @loki-in-hogwarts @spiderlingsweb

#tessa's assets #Peter Parker x Reader #Reader insert #Peter Parker #Spider-Man #peter parker fanfiction #spiderman fanfiction #Tacos #Spanish Class #Don Juan #May Parker #Open Prompts #100 followers celebration!#prince-p-parker #not my photos #my collage though

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shemakesmusic-uk · 4 years

Photo

This segment features artists who have submitted their tracks/videos to She Makes Music. If you would like to be featured here then please send an e-mail to [email protected]. We look forward to hearing from you!

Dahlia

Dahlia is an Edinburgh-based singer-songwriter and the music she creates is a hybrid of trip-hop, R&B and witch house with lyrics which focus on mental health and bizarre life experiences. Alongside Jordan Russell-Hall on production and Jamie Clapton on drums and live arrangements they are influenced by the forward thinking sounds and attitudes of FKA Twigs, SOPHIE and Young Fathers. Dahlia has just released the double single 'Clarity' / 'Slip Slowly' and here is what she had to say on the offering: "I chose to release these two songs together because they are bookends to a time in my life when I was learning how to identify toxic behaviours in others and unlearn them in myself—shout out to the queens of boundaries themselves Florence Given and Michelle Elman for that one. Opening up dialogues about mental health is something that’s very important to me and my music and these songs demonstrate that. I grew up singing Gaelic folk songs. I’ve found this style of singing and the storytelling style of songwriting has woven it’s way into my current way of working. I’m also heavily influenced by late ‘90s and early 2000s sounds and aesthetics like Portishead but also more contemporary sounds like FKA Twigs and Sevdaliza. These two songs are a marriage of all these things with a little Dido drama at the end for good measure." Listen below.

Gillian Stone

Gillian Stone is a Toronto-based multi-instrumentalist who aims to reconcile tenderness and dark emotion in her work. Her music is an exploration of inner and outer landscapes, turbulent feelings, recovery, and the juxtaposition of femininity and imperfection. She uses vulnerability to create a safe space to explore the dichotomy of beauty and discomfort. Her background in jazz and ethnomusicology has heavily influenced her work. Her upbringing on Vancouver Island also led her to Coast Salish hip hop and the soundscape and scene of the Cascadian bioregion. Stone uses an interdisciplinary approach to explore disparate genres in order to produce a singular sonic environment. New song 'Bridges' is the soundscape of recovery. "I wrote this song in 2009 after a summer of self-imposed turbulence," says Gillian. "I don't remember exactly when or how I wrote it, but it stayed with me and became predictive. For over a decade, I've returned to it as a space to safely express shame. Now it's morphing into a reminder, a call for self-temperance. I'm still discovering what it means. 'Bridges' follows a journey of dysregulated emotions exacerbated by alcohol abuse. The e-cello movement is meant to evoke the feeling of losing one's mind. This is a post-rock night song that ends with a promise of the sun." Listen below.

Gillian Stone · Bridges

Jenna Kearns

Jenna Kearns is a disabled songwriter from South Wales. She has rheumatoid arthritis and spent a lot of time as a young child in and out of hospital, having treatments, tests and operations. She grew up and has lived in a small town most of her life. "I’ve always had music in my life in one way or another but when I was younger it was musical theatre," says Jenna. "It was while studying at university that my passion for writing songs became my main focus." She worked with a songwriter/producer in Leamington Spa and it was there she wrote her first EP Time Has Passed which was released in July 2016. Last year in 2019 the title track of the EP was used on the TV show Dance Moms. During lockdown since March she has been writing nonstop with different songwriters/producers. "I now have such an incredible team behind me that I’m very excited for the near future as a disabled artist," she says. "Personally for me being a disabled artist in the industry who cannot get out of her wheelchair the biggest challenge has really been access into studios/songwriting spaces. The studio I worked with on my first EP wasn’t accessible however it was a simple fix they had someone build ramps for me to be able to access the parts of the studio needed." 'Thank you' is the latest single from Jenna. Co-written with and produced by hotly tipped singer/songwriter Joe Dolman, 'Thank You' is a new spin on the damaging effects of toxic relationships. Offering a positive outlook on this negative experience, the song thanks someone for showing their true intentions. "This year during my 8 months of shielding, I've been writing loads, creating an identity and really honing in on my sound and skills. Part of what makes me unique is being a female disabled artist, having a physical disability people don't see that much disability representation within the music industry, physical disabilities even less so. Talking about disabled creatives or in my case disabled artist will push forward barriers, because I simply do not want to be seen as just the disabled girl, but want to find those who are about inclusivity and talent." Listen to 'Thank You' below.

Jenna Kearns · Thank You - Next Single 13th november

Total Brutal

Total Brutal is the new indie pop solo project from Los Angeles based singer, songwriter and multi-instrumentalist Emily Moore. Moore is known as a professional touring musician, having shared the stage with the likes of Grammy award-winning band FUN, Børns, Ella Vos, X Ambassadors and many more. With the goal of spreading positivity and self-empowerment, Total Brutal has an ethos of standing up for yourself in order to be heard and seen, facing fears head on and being comfortable in your own skin. Her latest single 'Egypt' is an 80’s tinged song, reminiscent of Phoenix meets Fleetwood Mac. Oozing with soaring harmonies and warm, muted vocals, the funk-fueled track shimmers brightly, creating the ultimate dance-worthy anthem. 'Egypt' narrates trying to get the feeling back of being a kid and the excitement of what the future holds. Nowadays we live in fear of the uncertainty, wanting to bury our heads and hide ourselves away. Moore confides, “I constantly need to remind myself to play more and lighten up. It’s easy to get lost in the seriousness of life but I want to go through life having fun and viewing everything with curiosity.” The sun-soaked track succeeds in lifting spirits, certain to put a smile on your face from the very get go. Inspired by strong female artists, Total Brutal is determined to help other young women make their worth known and their voices heard. She shares, “It took me a really long time to understand that I am allowed to speak up, have opinions and speak directly. I’m starting to realize that I can be myself and be liked and professional all the same. I want to help foster that adventurous spirit and confidence in young women!” Listen to 'Egypt' below.

Total Brutal · Egypt

Kate Boothman

Hailing from The Ganaraska Forest in Southern Ontario, horse trainer turned singer-songwriter, Kate Boothman, emerges with her forthcoming sophomore record, My Next Mistake this fall. Recorded at producer, Thomas Knox D’Arcy’s, Taurus Recording, over 2 snowy weeks in January, 2019, Kate and Thom made what they referred to in the studio as a “massage rock” record. Writing as they went, Kate and Thom’s life-long friendship enabled them to tuck into their shadows. This provided them with instant fodder for the moody narrative that Kate delivers as part prayer, part animal, and entirely her own. This sits nicely against the sweeping strings, heavy bass, twangy guitars, organ swells and sometimes thunderous drums that make the trippy washed out folk scape reminiscent of something Lee Hazelwood would have dreamed up with the help of Mazzy Star. Latest single '17' "is one of those songs that emerged fully formed," says Kate. "It's about that confidence and arrogance that comes with being a spicy youth, and then all of a sudden you're an adult and you realize you knew nothing. You look back and can't help but examine everything you've learned and lost. I wrote '17' after a particularly heavy day during a particularly heavy time in my life. I was overworked, overwhelmed, underslept, heartbroken, and generally confused. I got home late, laid down on the floor, and when I got up, wrote the song in 20 minutes. My songs come fast, but they build up slowly. Festering away inside until they simply can't be contained." Listen below.

Kate Boothman · 17

Clara Byrne

Clara Byrne is a socialist singer-songwriter from Bray. She seeks her lyrical inspiration in the world around her and seeks solitude from that world in the music she creates. 'Conflict Bound' is her first single from her upcoming debut album Handstitched. Clara on 'Conflict Bound': "In a world filled with juxtaposed opinions and clashing ideals, it is getting progressively harder to know where to stand. It can be nearly impossible not to get bogged down in fighting the opposition or slaving towards winning small mercies. It all seems so vast, so utterly impossible to grasp. But there are rare occasions when a clearing appears through the density. These moments when everything is laid out in its most digestible form, is worth waiting for. The woods briefly comes into view and with it a sense that it is all so obvious.We cannot go on like this, in this pressure cooker waiting to be boiled alive. We are heading towards a grand finale; the likes of which mankind has never seen before. As we navigate through the late stages of capitalism, its true face appears clearer now than ever before; we the people are expendable. And like the true dying beast that it is, it will not go down easy. It will not go down alone. Don’t let it’s dying cries drown out what has become clear to you; we’re conflict bound." Listen below.

Conflict Bound by Clara Byrne

Just Costa

For Just Costa, music is just the ticket — to their own sonic theme park. "We call it Just Costa Land," quips Jesse Just Costa, who leads the Montreal outfit with sister Juliana. "We want to bring the sense of an amusement park to our music. The excitement, the enthusiasm, the joie de vivre; that's what we're bringing to life." They have all the building blocks they need. First and foremost are their vocals: Hers clear, supple and sweetly flowing, his lightly sanded and breezy. They blend with the grace and beauty of siblings who finish each other's sentences. Then there are the songs: Richly melodic, lyrically life-affirming and — most crucially — irresistibly groovy. Laced with Jesse's tasteful guitar work, crafted from an amalgam of contemporary R&B, soul, funk, pop and more, their tracks can hold their own next to hits from Bruno Mars, Michael Jackson and Khalid. Enjoy the ride. "'514' is our ode to the beautiful city of Montreal," say the dup of their latest single. "Our hometown's energy is creative and electric. The people are kind and open – you can feel the joie de vivre in the air, especially in the summertime. If your city inspires you, pushes you to open your heart and do better, then this song is for you. This is our first fully self-produced single, recorded in our own studio, with some help from the retro synth wizard himself, Paul Shrofel. The beauty of a song about a city is that everyone has their own unique stories and experiences within that city. Montreal has no lack of open-mindedness, artsiness, or beautiful people, and this city is an ongoing narrative that threads through the story of our own lives."

Just Costa · 514

#submission saturday #dahlia #gillian stone #jenna kearns #total brutal #kate boothman #clara byrne #just costa

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weedsekatzefollowers · 6 years

Text

First of all, an explanation.

WK Followers has been in development for six years. It’s nearly complete, but release is still some time away. Why?

I’d like to start this off by saying that I started conceptualizing this mod as soon as I got my hands on Skyrim back in ‘11. I didn’t have a computer back then (I was still playing on my XBox), so I’d write manuscripts and stories on my crappy laptop. When I got a better laptop a year later, I went straight to work. Skyrim was - just like its predecessors - a wonderful world, full of so much potential, but unfortunately it fell a little... flat... in the story department. I wanted to change that.

But I barely knew where to start. Of course, I knew what I wanted to do, but I had no idea how to implement it. And thus started my year-long journey of familiarizing myself with the Creation Kit. Even after all these years, I still find new ways of optimizing things, and this absolutely needs to be done before I can even think of clicking that “Submit mod” button on the Nexus.

Example (it gets pretty technical at this point, so feel free to skip ahead if you rather wouldn’t bother with this):

What you see here is the dialogue view. This is were dialogue’s written, voice files added, and so on. It’s also a prime example of sloppy work. I had watched a tutorial once, followed along with it for a single quest, and then forgot everything essential about it and just went on with writing everything down all nilly willy. Every quest, with the exception of the one I mentioned, looks like this. It’s a single top-level dialogue branch with a lot of stuff cramped in there. Why’s that a problem? Well, I’m sure there’s other reasons I haven’t discovered yet. But what I realized far too late was that some dialogue choices simply would not show up. Once there were more than six choices with a higher character count than 70, you would not be able to see the last three choices in-game. So I watched the tutorial again, and lo and behold, answers are supposed to go into their own branch, like this:

... Which is obviously more overseeable and also doesn’t conjure up any more in-game errors.

(Continue here, if you skipped ahead.)

Right now, fixing this up for thousands and thousands of dialogue lines is what’s eating up most of my time. The Creation Kit is pretty unstable, and breaking up links between dialogue topics makes it crash rather often. Every time this happens, I’ll have to load up my mod again, which can take up to five (!) minutes. It’s tedious work. Also, while I’m doing this, I usually check my spelling and grammar as well. I’m multilingual, and although I’d like to think my English is pretty fluent, every now and then I stumble over the odd little error. Furthermore, I’m debugging quite a lot of my scripts these days. Things break, it happens. People have their computers set up differently, not everything’s going to run smoothly. But once these bugs break my quests or the game, I’m drawing the line. Script bloating? Not under my watch. Fortunately, those troubles are resolved fairly quickly. Then of course, there’s model and texture problems.

Six years is a long time. Popular models and textures came and went, and I constantly changed the looks of my followers. But that was never enough for me, I wanted them to look somewhat unique and true to their quirks, traits and background stories. Well, as it turns out, my laptop had other plans. When it died on me, it took the entire first version of my mod with it, the above mentioned included. I had to start from scratch again. I was heartbroken, just about ready to give up (especially because merging .nifs is a pain in the ass). But after a couple of weeks, I pieced myself back together and began anew. ... That was about the time when I explored the Nexus further and found out more about permissions and asset use. You see, I treated the Nexus like an All-You-Can-Eat-Buffet. I took whatever tickled my fancy and never even thought about asking for permission to use it. And oh boy, was it hard for me to message the mod authors about the whole permission issue. Those people had accomplished everything I was trying to do. I don’t know why, but I kept on fearing they’d reject me because I hadn’t shared anything about my plans yet. I was wrong, of course. Some of them were incredibly nice about it, others less so. But I mostly got what I wanted. That being said though... I still need to get permission for three assets I’m currently using. Two of those authors haven’t been on the Nexus in a very long time. I’ve messaged them on there, but the messages haven’t been read yet. Some time ago I heard there’s some sort of timeframe during which an author has to log into the Nexus. Once these six months have expired without them logging in, you are allowed to just freely take those assets. True or not, under no circumstances am I gonna do that. Once the mod is polished up, I’ll try to reach these authors again. If I don’t get any answers, I’ll simply replace those models and textures. Textures haven’t been optimized yet. ... Which leads to an annoying bug that prevents the facial textures from loading if you have a ton of other high-res textures installed. The entire face appears pitch black, then. Except for the eyes. And scars. And the inside of the mouth. It’s the stuff of nightmares, I tell ya. Unused world building meshes and textures haven’t been removed from the Creation Kit and data folders yet. It’s a big mod. We don’t need unnecessary resources crammed in there. Some dungeons haven’t been optimized yet. ... Mainly because I hate room bounds and portals. No matter how close I line these damn boxes up, it never works out. I’ll get to it... eventually. I want to make sure there’s absolutely no continuity errors or plot holes in my stories. ... Because I’m trying to be as lore-friendly as possible and I can’t stand bad writing. In its time, WK Followers saw three different hard drives. Some data files might be missing. Although I’ve not run into any errors regarding this, I’ll still need to check if this might cause troubles. ... And actually I’m dreading this one the most. Two of my old hard drives are entirely destroyed. Can’t access anything on these and since I was very unorganized back then, I might not be able to recover them at all.

And finally... the mod hasn’t been cleaned yet. I’m somewhat familiar with Tes5Edit. This is no big deal. I simply want to wait until I’m done changing things up in my .esp before I get to cleaning. That’s why there’s no release date for the mod yet. But I plan on giving (at the very least) weekly updates on this blog now. And if you did stick around up until now, well that’s great! Thanks so much for your interest in what I’m doing! Here, have a little sneak peek at what’s coming to your computers soon as a little welcome gift! :)

#Skyrim #WK Followers #TES: V #Developer Journal #Modding

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musicallysublime-blog · 5 years

Text

I’m Alive

So I’ve taken a short break, but I finally feel ready to come back on a somewhat “regular” schedule. For this post, I’m going to be talking about Atmosphere’s latest album titled Mi Vida Local. Atmosphere consists of rapper Slug (Sean Daley) and DJ Ant (Anthony Davis). I previously did a post about them click here to check it out. This album marked their ninth studio album and was released on October 5th, 2018. This post is going to be a little bit different, in that I am also going to mention their live show that I attended in the beautiful city of Ventura California on February 12th, 2019. This post is also different because I go into some detail about my personal life. I usually try to stick to just the music, but sometimes music is so powerful that it can take over and bring forth all the emotions. Considering the start of this year, yeah it was easy for me to connect with nearly every song on this album. Thanks for joining me on this musical journey. I hope you enjoy the read.

Now, this album was released in 2018, but my personal relationship was in a much happier place. So while I did listen to the album when it came out; the meaning to me had not hit me quite yet. As soon as the tour info was released I bought my ticket and had planned to make it a couples trip. Fast forward to the New Year, finding myself newly single and feeling heartbroken. My birthday came and my son surprised me with the vinyl, which I was beyond excited for. I opened it and quickly played it and that's when I realized it was all meant to be. The songs, the whole album really meant so much more to me.

My relationship ended in a way that I wasn't necessarily ready for. I know, how is one ever really ready for a relationship to end right? Sometimes both parties can feel each other out and you kind of know that the relationship has run its course. I was not on that page and to put it plainly I was deeply hurt. I put on this front that everything was fine because that's just the kind of person I am. I held it together until I heard the album again on vinyl.

The day before the show, I still wasn't sure on whether I was going to be making the trip on my own or if I was still going to try to find someone to come along with me. That night as I was playing the album, I came to the conclusion of taking my son with me. Now, a quick little note about my kiddo; he's been to (after this show) eight shows (not counting the ones he attended while I was pregnant with him and the ones before he was one year old). His dad has been the one to take him to all the shows he's been to and so I knew this was going to be extra special considering it would be a first for us as a mother and son.

I'm going to quickly summarize the show and say that it was more than I expected. It had been 13 years since I've seen Atmosphere live and to say, that I needed this show, is a complete understatement. I stood there taking in his words, hearing songs that I've heard when I was a teenager going through a very difficult time in my life. Not only that but looking down and seeing my nine-year-old son getting into the music as well, it was easy to say that I was a wave of emotions. I was able to be completely free and for the first time, in all honesty, I was ready to move forward. I love music, and this is one of the reasons why; being able to share this experience with my son and having him listen to music that I love is something I will never forget.

So now I'm here writing this post while the record is playing and the music is being permanently embedded into my brain. I want to thank my son (and his dad and his girlfriend because I know they were behind getting me the vinyl) in gifting me this album on vinyl. The album's first song is titled none other than 'Jerome' (that happens to be my son's name. I don't believe in coincidences so it was in the cards that I take my son to this show). It's a song that begins with some guitar work and it's a perfect introduction to the album. 'Stopwatch' is the next song and it's probably my second favorite song. This song was played live and it was just as good. It features DJ scratching which I absolutely love; it's done so well and in a way that it doesn't overpower the song but it’s still noticeable. The first side ends with 'Virgo'. The melody is much more mellow compared to 'Stopwatch' but it doesn't take away from how touching the song is. It really allows for Slug's lyrics to speak clearly.

You lookin' for a bag of tricks But my love is like a stack of bricks Cobblestones and untreated lumber I'm a father of fists, strength, in numbers And when they come for my box of dreams I'm a finally depart from this toxic scene

Side two begins with 'Delicate' and once more the song provides some beautiful imagery. The beat on this song is so soothing. The song for me teaches me that letting go is part of living.

And as the seasons go by, more friends say, "Bye" Less luggage makes it easier to fly

This next song spoke volumes to me. 'Drown' which features Cashinova, The Lioness, and Dem Atlas along with the ever-talented Slug join together to provide one of my favorite songs of 2019. Yes, I know the year has just started but I'm confident enough to say that about this song. The whole song is on its own level, but this verse done by The Lioness really hit me hard and it's the most beautiful thing I've heard in a long time.

You can't just take, reciprocate, make an exchange I'm lighting sage to cleanse a space Getting that bad energy up off of me Replaced with inner peace Fools call you so expose enemies with false identities You're no friend to me so don't pretend to be

Their different tones work perfectly with the structure of the song. Not only is the song done exceptionally well, but let me elaborate a little bit as to why this song means so much to me.

The last song on this side is 'Anymore' and this is the deepest for me. Once more it's like Slug knew exactly what to say while the words flowed out of my speakers.

I'm not trying to put my energy inside the worst I fight the urge, to submit to your hurtful shit I ain't got the wish to waste on a perfect bitch

I probably listened to this side a minimum of five times. If you take a chance please do yourself a favor and listen to these three songs. I mean the whole album is gold, but at the very least give these three songs a chance.

'Earring' begins side three, which features artist Musab. Following it is 'Trim' which is a little more light-hearted. 'Trim' mentions the sexual life of a couple; in terms of trying to make time for each other while raising their children. The side ends with 'Specificity' which follows 'Trim' perfectly in my opinion.

Lastly, there is side four and it begins with a song called 'Mijo' which translates to son in Spanish. This song is touching as it reflects on parenthood and being a parent myself; yeah it hit close to home.

I don't know how much time we have left But I promise you that when I breathe my last breath I'ma exhale and remember your birth It's never too late to get some heaven on earth

'Randy Mosh' is next and it features collaboration with The Dynospectrum, which is another great song full of some amazing lyrics. The album ends with 'Graffiti'. I love this song and for, me, it ties it all together. It tied my whole relationship perfectly. It's funny really how music heals and allows for closure; at least that's what it did for me. His whole lyrics are a beauty but this particular part is in my top ten.

I'm examining the clouds like I'm looking for a sign I hope you're having a good time If you wasn't afraid would you lie so much You got your tail between your legs chasing fire trucks You can tell I'm not the best at expressing how I felt That's why I hide it inside the words I spell I mix the medication, it fixes whatever ails them And now she treats me like a snake oil salesman, huh Well, thank you for your vote of confidence I don't give a shit about how it figures into all your politics Still believe you gotta make your art, play your part The world waits for you to break my patient heart

After going to the show and listening to the album I realized just how much I needed this. I needed to experience live music, his live music. Not only was it the experience worth it but also the way I came out feeling was beyond healing for me. Music has powers for sure that can take you back to memories that you thought you forgot, it can help you move on from difficult situations, it can provide that outlet that is so desperately needed; in short, it can work wonders. For me, this has to be one of their best albums, top three for me.

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thehighladyofasgard · 7 years

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Old Flame - Nine

Summary: Tony Stark has finally gotten over Pepper Potts. He finds himself on the receiving end of the same treatment he subjected his lovers to over the years when he is smitten with a mysterious 19 year old college student. Tony is determined to find out her secrets but will he be able to handle it when he does?

Characters: Female Reader, Tony Stark, Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers

Word Count: 1.7K

Warning: smut and swearing and violence

A/N: You guys, I hope this was worth the wait! Please give me feedback! Let me know if you want me to continue with this! I am back at university now and will try and update as regularly as I can! Enjoy. Thank you for all the messages you guys have sent so far. I love you, xx.

Old Flame Masterlist

Your name: submit What is this?

‘Papa, don’t let them take me!’ You cried out as two burly men dragged you away, kicking and screaming. Your tiny voice echoed through the cavernous hallway but your father was unfazed. He watched on through cold, gray eyes as you clutched onto your pink tear-stained teddy bear and begged him to stop them. Sometimes, you could still feel the ridges in your arms from where they gripped you. ‘Papa! Papa!’ Your pleas fell on deaf ears. Over time, this became routine and the tears grew fewer until they faded away altogether.

Every morning, for the next twelve years, you would be escorted down the same hallway, shoved through giant metal doors – knees first onto hard concrete – to begin your daily training. The room was always musty and dark. It was hard to breath. It was hard to see. Everything was always still.

You would wait patiently for the patter of agile footsteps, the faint glimmer of silver in the blackness and those oceanic blue eyes…

Those same blue eyes stared back at you now. They were everything you remembered but at the same time, nothing at all. There was a renewed softness to them that made it seem like you were looking at a stranger. Tony looked on with confusion as you and Bucky continued your stare down; neither of you blinked or spoke in fear of what the other might say.

“You two know each other?” You blinked and moved your gaze towards Tony. “Answer me! Do you two know each other?” He demanded with a look of utmost betrayal but before you could respond, Steve appeared at the door and ushered the three of you inside the boardroom. Tony shot a silent glare in your direction as Bucky chivalrously gestured for you to take a seat. It was clear from his expression that the conversation was not over.

Steve cleared his throat with a low cough and dragged Tony’s attention over to the surveillance footage on the projector. You leaned forward and squinted at the screen. The quality of the footage and the positioning of the time stamp screamed Department of Traffic. “What are we looking at here, Cap?” Tony sighed, he was eager to get back to your conversation.

“This footage was taken in the early hours of this morning.” Steve enlarged the image and with a few clicks the quality improved but not by much. “We almost didn’t catch this but a security cam spotted Zemo outside the Empire Hotel and he wasn’t alone.” Murmurs spread around the room. This was the closest they’d ever come to finding him since his seemingly miraculous escape about a year ago. No one could understand how he escaped a super-max, unaided. But what they didn’t know was that he wasn’t unaided. You gripped the edge of the table tightly and shifted in your seat, anxious that you were about to be found out. Thankfully, everyone shared your uneasiness and didn’t notice your paling knuckles.

“The hotel where Ross was staying?” Tony wiped his brow and Bucky clenched his metal fist. “Any idea who he’s working with?” Steve moved the cursor a few inches forward until it brought up a hooded figure, lurching through the shadows. The feed cut-off just before you could look directly into the traffic camera.

“We don’t know who she is or what she’s doing with Zemo but there was an incident at the Empire with Ross.” Bucky suggested speaking to Ross but he had already returned to London on an urgent mission. “I’m thinking about going over to the hotel now to interview speak to some of the staff in case someone saw something, you guys in?” Steve looked around the room and everyone agreed to accompany him except for Tony who kept his eyes fixed on you.

“Yeah, I think I’m gonna sit this one out, Cap.” Sensing the tension between you and Tony, Steve didn’t mind. He assured Tony – in a quiet whisper – that they would be fine without him and that they would call if they needed him. Bucky lingered behind for a moment and stole a quick glance of you as the boardroom emptied out. “So clearly, you and Barnes know each other.” Tony rose from his seat and began to pace around the room like a caged animal. You rounded the table and blocked his path, forcing him to look you in the eye. He tried to move around you but you stepped in front of him again. With a sigh of resignation, he finally asked how you and Bucky knew each other.

“Two years ago, when my dad died, I was lost. I had no sense of purpose and I needed a way to blow off steam so I joined a gym and met Bucky there. We got to talking and he offered to give me a few self-defense classes which I didn’t refuse since I was going to be living alone in New York City. He needed the money and didn’t ask any questions, that’s all it was, I swear.” You pulled your bottom lip between your front teeth and prayed that he bought it.

“Oh, I’m sure self-defense classes was all he gave you!” He suggested, sarcastically.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You could feel the anger starting to bubble inside of you.

“You’re a smart girl, figure it out!”

“You know what? I don’t have time for your childishness!” You threw your hands in the air in defeat and turned to storm out when he spat angrily,

“Childishness? I’m not the one afraid to make a commitment because I’m holding a torch for my old flame!” With a glare, you spun around to face him.

“First of, I didn’t ask you to introduce me to anyone, you were the one who kept pushing me! Second, nothing happened between Bucky and I. Third, you wanna talk about exes? Let’s talk about why Pepper keeps sniffing around here and that’s why I won’t commit to you because I know you will fuck this up sooner or later and I don’t wanna be the one left heartbroken when you eventually decide that a 19-year-old is not for you.” You didn’t care that you were screaming and had somehow ended up inches from his face. Your chest rose and fell with each breath as Tony gazed into your fiery eyes. He was just as angry as you were Tony cut you off by crashing his lips onto yours.

“You’re the only one for me, Y/N! When will you going to get that through your head?” You could feel your anger beginning to dissolve with his words and you began to kiss him passionately. He walked you over to the glass boardroom table and swiped his hand across it, clearing its contents onto the floor.

Tony wasted no time as he ripped off your dress and pulled your panties down your legs. He fumbled with his belt as the two of you locked lips feverishly, gasping and moaning as your tongues fought for domination. With a twist of your forearm, he pinned you – face first – onto the glass coffee table and positioned himself between your legs. He rubbed his throbbing cock down your slit before he rammed into you. You let out a pleasured scream as he gripped your waist and pounded into you. He leaned over your body and sank his teeth into your shoulder.

When he straightened up again, he lifted your right knee onto the table and pushed deeper into you. He rolled his head back and moaned in pleasure. Tony grunted as he pulled your shoulders back, to remove all the space between the two of you. He snaked his hand around your waist before dipping it between your legs and massaging your clit. Tony grabbed your hips again and began to slam into you, hard and fast, as he drove the two of you towards your orgasms.

He pulled out of you and staggered over to the nearest chair, in a heaving mess as you pulled on your tattered dress. Before you could zip up your dress, he was behind you again and pulled it down your shoulders. “I’m not done with you,” he growled, making your skin tingle with anticipation and a smile spread across your face as he nipped at your collarbone. “I’m gonna grab a bottle of champagne and some ice and I expect to see you in my bed, naked and ready for me when I get there.” His voice was strong and commanding and dared you to defy him. He smacked your ass and grabbed his shirt on the way out of the boardroom. You couldn’t help but giggle in excitement.

Once you were completely dressed again, you skipped out of the boardroom and made your way towards Tony’s bedroom when you felt a hand wrap around your throat and you were pulled into the hall closet. Your feet dangled above the ground as your coughed and sputtered, trying to free yourself from the steely hold.

“B-Buc…” You tried weakly but your voice gave out as his fist tightened.

“I didn’t tell them who you were back there because I thought maybe you’re trying to build a life for again and I know what that’s like.” He pressed you up against the wall firmly as you struggled in his grip.

“I-I am–” You were running out of breath and when he realized this he dropped you to the floor. Coughing and gasping, you held onto the wall to stop yourself from falling over.

“I’ve seen enough footage of you to know that was you with Zemo–” Just as you were about to deny it, he stopped you. “–Listen to me, whatever you’re doing here, if it’s for Zemo, it stops now, d’you hear me? If you genuinely care about Stark, stop whatever it is you’re doing with Zemo or I’ll tell everyone who you really are. I won’t warn you again, Y/N! You’re better than this!” He slammed the hall closet door behind him and you jumped. You hadn’t realized you had been holding your breath all this time.

If only it were that easy…

@thevanishedillusion @scrapbook-next-generation@iamthemaskhewears@harleyscheekheart@kaylinnisonfire@adribieber99 @arfrona-and-marvel@arfrona@bookchic20@marvell0usmaximoff @lost-in-the-stories @superwholock-unicorn@gracefulglenn @bookworm4ever99 @seargantbcky @eileenlikesyou-maybe @hollycornish @capsicletho @fandommaniacx @wizardoffangirling

#old flames series #tony stark x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #marvel smut #marvel imagines #tony stark fanfiction #marvel au

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teen-cups-au · 3 years

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🌺¡Heartbroken Disease!🌺

💙❤️¡A Teen Cups Fanfiction Submitted by a follower!💙❤️

🌼💕Heartbroken disease part 17💕🌼

Warnings : Light Angst

✧༺♥༻✧

🧡¡Back to Djimmi!🧡

He looked at Mugman.. Sadness on his face.. He sighed... He then looked at Cuphead. .... "Hm?"

Wait.. If Mugman is dead.. Then why... Why is Cuphead still on Mugman's body and not on his own body... Why didn't he fade away?

Wait... That's it! Usually after death there is 7 minutes brain activity.. Maybe there is still time. If he could buy a little more time!..

That's it! Hope rose in his heart!

"Hey we may still have time!" Djimmi said Elder kettle asked "Huh? What do you mean?"

"after death there is 7 minutes of brain activity! Now if we can buy some more time we can save him!!" he answered!

"Indeed!" Andrea said wiping the tears away her tears using her sleeve "we may still have time! You are right!" she said *sniff*

"will it work?" Elder kettle asked "We need to try" Djimmi replied

"please do what you have to!" Elder Kettle said "I will! Sir don't worry!" Elder Kettle nodded.

He went above Cuphead's body and spoke.

✨✨✨✨

"Cuphead?!" Djimmi's voice echoed.

No answer!

"Cuphead?!" Djimmi's voice echoed.

Still no answer.

"Are you still there?" he asked.

Cuphead murmured his eyes unfocused.. "Mhm"

"You okay?" Andrea asked.

"...mhm.." he said.

" Cuphead we-" Djimmi attempted to speak only to be interrupted by Cuphead.

"..... I failed to save my baby brother, fought someone who looked like me, saw Mugman bleeding, cracking, getting shot, I saw his bones breaking, getting hurt etc etc etc ...so... yeah.. IIIII. Aaaaaammmm. Perfectly. Fiiiiiiiiiiiine!!" he said

More tears ran down his eyes "grandpa.. I *deep shaky breath * I.. I... *gulp * I AM SORRY!!SO SORRY!!" he yelled.

"Cuphead my boy! its going to be okay! We will pass through this together!! You tried! You did your best! I am proud of you! Its gonna be okay! I promise! Please! Listen to Djimmi!" he said trying to calm his first Grandson

"DIDN'T YOU HEAR ME?! MUGMAN IS DEAD! MY BROTHER IS DEAD!!! GONE!! CIAO CIAO!! BYE BYE!! ADIOS!! AU REVOIR!!! THERE IS NOTHING LEFT FROM HIM!!!!! NOTHING LEFT BUT BROKEN PIECES AND DUST!!!!!! I FAILED YOU ALL!!" he yelled crying his heart out! He grabbed the rim of his cup in despair. Insanity slowly conquering his mind!

"Cuphead?..... Cuphead?........ Cuphead!..... CUPHEAD!!.... " he tried. However Cuphead was not listening! He was bawling, apologizing, mumbling..

Djimmi had no choice and said " forgive me Elder Kettle!" he, went above Cuphead's body and slapped his cheeks *SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP*

(poor cup) Cuphead's face rolled left and right

Elder kettle flinched "Is this necessary?" he asked. Djimmi nodded "SNAP OUT OF IT!"

Cuphead felt a strong pain in his cheeks."What the-?" his head rolled left and right... Djimmi's voice thundered. He heard him telling to snap out of it. "FINE! IM HERE! PLEASE STOP SLAPPING ME!"

"CUPHEAD?! LISTEN TO ME!!" Djimmi yelled!

"WWWWWHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTT?!?!?!?!? TELL ME! WHAT IS IT?!" He yelled at the top of his lungs. (Daw! Poor boy!)

"Cuphead! His brain will have 7 minutes activity! I will bye you 7 minutes more! You now have 14 minutes before you disappear and he is gone completely!"

"W-what?" he asked perplexed "We are doing what we can from outside! Come on! Hurry!"

"But I don't know...how to fix this!" he said.

"Deep down you know!! Deep down in your heart you know!" Djimmi said.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

"Andrea I want you to perform CPR inject this into his body! Elder kettle please keep time! I will therefore need your assistance! Could you crush this for me please?"

Elder kettle nodded. He looked at his watch. "14 minutes start now! GO!" Djimmi said.

Cuphead took deep breaths.

✨✨✨✨✨✨

Djimmi had finished with the medicines/potions! Only one left. Elder kettle crushed the herbs and gave them to him. He put them inside a pot with boiling water and let them there for a while.

Andrea put an oxygen mask on Mugman's face.. She took an injection with a blue substance and injected it in his left arm. She then started pressing his chest performing CPR.. She was afraid to touch his chest because it was cracked a lot! However she didn't have a choice. She wore gloves.

✨✨✨✨✨✨

💲🌷¡Back to Cuphead!💲🌷

Cuphead looked at the broken pieces.. He put them together like puzzle. It took him 4 minutes. He was actually pretty good with puzzles. (we now have 10 minutes left!)

He then put his left hand (to all those wondering why the left hand! Well its closer to the heart! ❤️) above the pieces of the broken heart.

His tears fell on the broken pieces. Purple energy like dust came out of his chest. He remembered that Mugman had indeed given him some of his energy before he shattered.

He concentrated! Memories played in his mind! Him cuddling him for the first time! Them playing together when they were children! Them hunting down butterflies! Them eating ice-cream together, hugging, watching movies together.. (etc)

A smile appeared in his face.. Tears of repentance, happiness, joy and pure brotherly love fell upon the pieces. The heart shone a bright blue color ..

The heart was back together!!!!

Mugman's heart was collected again. Cuphead opened his eyes. The heart still had some cracks but he could hold it in his palms. He carefully lifted the heart and held it, close to his own heart "THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP .." <= (Cuphead's pulse)

Soon Cuphead could hear a second

heartbeat.. a faint one.. However the heartbeat grew stronger and stronger.. *thump...thump....thump....thump...thump...thump...thump...thump...thump... Thump... Thump... THump... THump... THUmp...THUmp...THUMp... THUMp... THUMP...THUMP...*

He noticed one more thing!

This dark place was no longer dark it started blossoming beautiful colorful flowers. The trees grew stronger and green butterflies flew around him.

Cuphead looked around him fascinated.

He hugged Mugman's heart a little tighter. Their hearts joining..

Cuphead gave him strength! The pieces that were Mugman were surrounded by a purple light.. They were recollected.. They shone bright and Mugman was whole again. In one piece! Cuphead cheered "Mugman?!" he went close to him. There was a gap on his chest. He took the heart and put it there. The heart was absorbed by his body.

Cuphead held him. Mugman's mug was on Cuphead's chest. Cuphead watched the paradise blossoming around them!

Cuphead leaned above his face. He gently patted his cheeks "Mug?" *pat pat pat pat pat pat *

Mugman squeezed his eyes a little. He then opened them slowly.

His vision was blurry in the beginning.. He blinked a few times. When his vision became clearer he noticed someone standing above him. He looked better and saw that before him was Cuphead! Mugman gasped *GAAAASSSPP cough cough cough huff huff pant pant*

Cuphead said "Hey! Take it easy!"

"C-cup?" he asked. Cuphead caught his hands and lifted him wrapping him in a warm embrace. "It's good to have you back!". Cuphead said smiling. Mugman buried his face in Cuphead's shoulder (note: Apologies! I forgot the English word! What I mean here is the gap/ curve between the neck and the shoulder)

Cuphead squeezed him.. In his embrace! Cuphead soon realized that he started fading. "Cuphead? What -?Where are you going? Why are you fading?" Mugman asked concerned.

"Don't worry!! Its okay!! My.. Work here is done!! See you outside!" He didn't let go of the hug..

While Mugman was hugging his big brother. Cuphead faded away. (we now have 5 minutes left)

*･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*ﾟ:*:✼❀❁♡❁❀✼:*ﾟ:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･*

💕¡End of part 17!💕

😅¡Excuse me for typos!😅

💕🌺💙¡¡Thank you for reading!!💕🌺💙

😘😘 💋💋 💖💖

Doudy (mod): There! There's still hope! Told ya!

Dammit Cuphead, listen!

Yeeesssss!

#teen cups #teen cups au #cuphead #mugman #cuphead au #fanart #submission

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thechasefiles · 5 years

Text

The Chase Files Daily Newscap 10/11/2019

Good Morning #realdreamchasers. Here is your daily news cap for Sunday, November 10th, 2019. There is a lot to read and digest so take your time. Remember you can read full articles via Barbados Government Information Service (BGIS), Barbados Today (BT), or by purchasing a Sunday Sun Nation Newspaper (SS).

A CRISIS OF VIOLENCE HAS REACHED OUR SCHOOLS - Today is a tragic day in Barbados.For, in effect, not one but two young lives have been lost.When news initially broke that two teenagers had been involved in a stabbing incident at the Frederick Smith Secondary School, no one was prepared for what followed soon after.The nation was plunged into mourning upon learning that a 16-year-old boy was stabbed to death by a 15-year-old fellow student.It is tragic enough that this horrific death should add to the already grim statistic of 42 homicides for the year. What is particularly heartbreaking and even more ominous is that this sweeping wave of violence appears to have finally found its way into our schools, more than 30 years after the last such incident.Few if any parents, whose child leaves them for school on any given morning, contemplate that anything so shattering could befall them.Schools in most instances are deemed safe havens, as places where discipline and order are kept. Much has been invested to make schools child-friendly, reinforcing positive behaviours and the power of choice.But as one family is left to grieve the death of their beloved son, another family is similarly heartbroken, uncertain of what the future holds for their child, now accused of the most serious crime there is.This latest murder leaves several unanswered questions. Did these students carry to school the weapon used or was it stashed on the premises? What could have occurred to merit such a violent response? Why are our young people so angry?This tragedy will no doubt reignite the call for greater security measures to be put in place at the 26 public secondary schools across the island.But we submit that this is not the solution to a growing problem.This problem has developed in our homes and communities.In years gone by, communities were closely knit and it literally took a village to raise our children.Somehow along the way this community-minded spirit, this notion of being our brother’s and sister’s keeper, has been lost.Almost on a daily basis, our young people are appearing before the courts charged with serious crimes, including murder.This is reflected in the prison population. HM Prison Dodds is flooded with young people between the ages of 17 and 30.We consider this to be our young people’s cry for help.Minister of Education Santia Bradshaw summed it up with searing philosophical truth when she spoke to the media shortly after meeting with the school’s management team and teachers following the incident.She said: “I believe the reflection is on society, not just on parents who are perhaps sometimes not as vigilant in these times, in terms of checking to see what children are taking to school, but also this is a reflection of society at large.“A school is a small environment, but it is also a reflection of what is happening in society.“We can never see these things coming, but the reality is these are problems that are confronting this institution. It is certainly confronting other institutions.“And this is really a call to the wider society to take stock of what is happening and to be able to get on board to be able to assist not just families but certainly to be able to support the institutions as well.”Now the question still remains to be answered: How will schools respond?There is no magic wand that can be waved to end this apparent uptick in violence?Metal detectors are not a plausible fix, and it is almost impossible to individually search the bags of over 800 students on a daily basis multiplied by 26 high schools alone.But if it has taken this horrendous day of days to bring us to the realisation that we have reached a crisis of violence, in thought, word and deeds, so be it. Now is the opportunity for all of us to join together to fix this, or be condemned to a permanent state of failure. (BT)

CRIME STOPPERS RESPONDS TO SCHOOL STABBING - “This is a tragedy of mammoth proportions that no parent should have to deal with when sending their child to school.”This is the sentiment expressed by Sherie Holder-Olutayo, Programme Director of Crime Stoppers Barbados, in response to Friday’s incident at the Frederick Smith Secondary School that resulted in the death of a 16-year-old student.“We at Crime Stoppers Barbados are incredibly saddened and horrified to hear of the stabbing incident on Friday at Frederick Smith Secondary School. Our heartfelt prayers and deepest sympathies go out to the parents and families of both these young boys. This incident underscores the importance of our anger management conflict resolution programme, “Cool Yuh Head” in the island’s secondary schools.”Over the past seven years, the team of counsellors of Crime Stoppers Barbados has worked in several of the island’s 21 secondary schools to engage students in our “Cool Yuh Head” Programme.Our experience is that both male and female students are finding it increasingly difficult to keep a tight rein on their emotions especially in potentially volatile situations.“Cool Yuh Head is designed to provide students with the tools needed to apply reason and navigate difficult situations. Crime Stoppers Barbados is persuaded that anger management and conflict resolution programmes are vital to stemming the violent behavoiur exhibited by students at this time.No Government can sustain the task of changing this trend towards a culture of anger and retaliatory behavior alone. Corporate funding remains critical. Crime Stoppers Barbados believes that training in conflict resolution is key and must be sustained to realize long term benefits. We therefore redouble our efforts to establish and maintain partnerships with Principals, Corporate Sponsors and our team of highly skilled Counsellors in the various primary and secondary schools in Barbados. (BT)

OPTIMISTS INTERNATIONAL RESPONDS TO SCHOOL STABBING - Optimist International has issued the following statement in response to Friday’s incident at the Frederick Smith Secondary School that resulted in the death of a 16-year-old student.Full StatementA society that has reached the point where disputes of any type, but particularly disputes among our youth, are being resolved through aggressive postures is a society that needs intervention.A society that has reached the point where a human life has little value, is a society that is losing its soul.A society that is constantly hearing the cries from Educators that school environments are no longer safe havens, is a society that is losing its sense of place.Successive Governments have tried various tools and strategies to address these concerns; however, my concern is that these tools and strategies never appear holistic and strategic but rather they appear ad hoc and reactive.Our society requires an intervention where each of us plays a role in restoring a culture of discipline and inculcating positive values throughout our population.We cannot simply cry out that “we need to find the Lord” because we are all not believers. So although this can help, we must also embrace a system of participation by all, where we are each responsible for deploying and committing to a National narrative which is shaped by our leaders, while using our innate common sense to enforce or embolden acceptable norms of positive behavior by both adults and youth.A National narrative must focus on revamping our educational system; strengthening dysfunctional family units; managing cost of living; mandatory voluntary service; effective control of the drugs and gun trades; substance abuse; better employment opportunities; and a recommitment to set of cultural mores that once helped Barbados to be recognized as a civil society. This narrative but be set from the top and committed to by all of our Nation’s leaders. There must be outreach to NGOs, Religious Groups, and Educators to help shape and to support the narrative. It must be a national initiative led by the Government and managed in a non-partisan manner. These elements are done in some form or fashion but my point is that there needs to be cohesion and a clear outcome that is defined and desired.There are some who may say these comments are reactionary and they are right. There is always that moment that flicks the switch in ourselves that we must become part of the solution. Each of us need to have that moment. It is my intention to convene a meeting with local club and district leaders to determine how Optimist Clubs can work with Government, Educators, and other community leaders.This senseless act has left a family grieving, students shocked, and a Nation in disbelief. We can only imagine how the families of the victim and the perpetrator must feel. I am Christian so I will turn to prayers to support them. But I am also Bajan and I am a human being, so my commitment must extend beyond prayers, as must yours.Let’s use our hearts, voices, and hands to create a civil society that protects our youth, our people, and that embraces positive human and social values.Adrian M. ElcockPresident – Optimist InternationalBT)

CHILDREN CALLING HOTLINE TOO – Children are calling the Faith Marshall-Harris Sandy Lane Charitable Trust Helpline to ask mostly about abuse. Faith Marshall-Harris, UNICEF’s Barbados Champion for Children and founder of the helpline, said that while the helpline received all types of calls, many were “mainly . . . for help with real issues, mostly abuse”. “For the children, it is often when they have a sense of not being understood . . . they’re being disciplined too much or they’re being prevented from doing whatever. These are mainly children over a certain age. “The helpline grew out of the idea that you want to give children an opportunity, a voice.” (SS)

EDEN LODGE “NOT THTAT BAD” –Eden Lodge is not as bad as people are making it seem, say residents. They were responding to the Fear Of Crime survey, presented by criminologist and senior research officer at the Criminal Justice Research and Planning Unit, Kim Ramsay, which reported that shots were fired almost everyday and some residents didn’t leave home after 6 p.m. When a Sunday Sun team visited the densely populated community, several residents spoke but declined to give their names. Most said the St Michael community was much safer than it was before. “One time it used to happen (shooting) regularly, but where I am, I don’t hear gunshots everyday. But coming into this time of the year, there could be a possibility that it could pop back up,” a middle-aged woman said. (SS)

WOMAN FREED AFTER FIVE YEARS ON REMAND – More than five years after she made headlines, the woman who had been charged with two counts of rape and two counts of serious indecency towards two teenaged girls walked free from the High Court on Friday. And her attorney is asking for cases involving sexual offences to be fast-tracked so that other accused do not spend five years on remand awaiting the disposition of their cases like his client Lisa Lynton did. Lynton, now 42, of Foul Bay, St Philip, was indicted with committing an act of serious indecency on a 13-year-old girl, sometime between December 25, 2013, and April 30, 2014. She was also charged with raping the 13-year-old girl and her sister, as well as indecently assaulting the girl’s sister between the same dates. (SS)

ST. LUCY HARD HIT BY HEAVY RAINS – Less than two hours after the rain started to fall this morning, chairman of the St Lucy District Emergency Organisation, Rontae Johnson-Annius, was receiving calls about flooding in the parish. Johnson-Annius said the rain started around 6 a.m. and by 7:45 she was getting a picture of what was going on in Barbados’ northern-most parish. Just before midday, she told Nation News “basically every place is flooded”, but there are no injuries. There are reports of flooding across St Lucy, pools of water around homes, some homes have been breached by flood water and roads are impassable. The district chair said her team of between 60 to 70 people were on the ground providing reports. She can be reached at 439-8169. Johnson-Annius gave a snap shot of some of the damage in her parish. Many of the gullies are full to the brim and water has flooded surrounding areas. Water is making its way to the sea, but it will take some time given the volume of rain. The road from Northumberland to Hope Road is impassable because the gully there is at its limit, with water from Harris and Bridge Road also using that channel.From St Lucy Church to Crab Hill Police Station was impassable, but the road is now open. From Crab Hill Police Station to Greenidges, the road is impassable because the pump house is flooded and the water there is very high. Homes in Alexandria and Mount Gay are flooded. The water was high at Alleyndale, but that flowed off. Benthams and Colleton are impassable. The Met Office says a westward-moving tropical wave and an upper-level trough have been generating pockets of moderate to heavy showers, thunderstorms and occasional gusty winds over some sections of Barbados for several hours. A flash flood warning is in effect until 5 p.m. and director of the Department of Emergency Management, Kerry Hinds, has urged residents to remain indoors. (SS)

FLASH FLOOD WARNING EXTENDED – The Barbados Meteorological Service has extended the flash flood warning from 5 p.m. today to 6 a.m. tomorrow. The latest satellite and radar imagery suggest that clouds and showers associated with the tail-end of a tropical wave and an upper-level trough will continue to generate pockets of moderate to heavy showers, thunderstorms and occasional gusty winds over Barbados for at least another six to 12 hours, the Met office said. A flash flood warning means, in this case, that flooding due to heavy or excessive rainfall in a short period of time (generally less than six hours) is already occurring within the warning area. Residents in flood-prone areas are asked to remain on the alert and take the necessary precautions. This warning may be up-dated if conditions warrant. (SS)

WRIGHT AFTER GREAT RETURNS - Olympic hopeful Matthew Wright remains steadfast in his quest to collect enough points to qualify for next year’s Tokyo Olympics. Last week, he competed in the Lima ITU Triathlon World Cup, which was staged along the same course as for this year’s Pan American Games. However, he told Sunsport yesterday that he decided to drop out after challenges in the 5K event. “I actually didn’t finish. I had a best swim for the season, coming out in the Top 15 feeling really good and I had a really strong ride, riding in the front and staying out of trouble and not using much effort. Then I got on to the 5K run. It was one big group of about 50 guys coming off the bike and I was running probably as fast I have run for the entire season, but, you know, the 5K is just not really my specialty, I guess,” he said. (SS)

CRUNCH TIME FOR BIG BOYS – The fates of four of the “big clubs” of Barbadian football will hang in the balance tonight, as Empire take on University of the West Indies (UWI) Blackbirds and Weymouth Wales battle Paradise in the Capelli Super Cup quarter-finals at the Wildey Turf. Empire are one of four clubs with a 100 per cent record and were particularly impressive in the Championship stage where they scored six goals and kept two clean sheets. UWI have stumbled into the last eight, with their only positive result in the last round being a draw, or two dropped points, against Notre Dame. UWI still advanced ahead of Dames by virtue of losing only 3-0 to Wales, whereas Dames lost 6-0 a week prior. (SS)

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