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#stuff sorted out. and find like.. a good way to do things.. etc.. I did still want to sell them through auction instead of agonizing
lucalicatteart · 2 months
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A new sculpture! Finally... I feel like I never sculpt anymore since I'm always sick or have some 500 other things going on or projects to finish, but I'm trying to schedule time to do it more often this year hopefully..! Just a generic fantasy creature as usual, but did try making the eyes a little more sparkly this time.. hrmm..
#sculpture#fantasy art#fantasy creature#art#elf#lol what are the tags I should use... I still never know.. EVIL social media.. hate the idea of tagging anything ever anyway. but alas..#I also would ideally like to start selling them again and open up custom commmissions and stuff again once I can hopefully get paypal#stuff sorted out. and find like.. a good way to do things.. etc.. I did still want to sell them through auction instead of agonizing#over setting prices being afraid they're either too high or too low. So being able to just be like. Here. this is $50. or more. or less.#negotiate. the worth is whatever you feel like it is so i personally dont have to make that decision. etc. lol... But etsy doesn't let you#do auctions or like pay what you want type stuff so.. then I was thinking ebay? but idk.. ANYWAY.. I want to set things#up so I can sell stuff again hopefully. I still haven't fully recovered from the costs of when I had to take my cat to the vet and put#them down last year and etc. So it'd be good to sell a few things. perhaps.. maychance... perhamble... so on and so forthe... ANYWAY#I was going for whiter more milky sort of hair that blends in closely with the skintone but after the paint dried it seems more yellowy kin#of. which is fine. But just not exacltly like my mind vision lol..#Also it's like... wow... someone with face spots and elf ears and a half open mouth with a gap tooth and wavy hair and kind of downturned#eyes... revolutionary... never been seen before... every sculpture I have ever made surely doesnt look licherally exactly like this... LOL#but maybe it's just a style. so what. People have their motifs lol.. Im just getting back into sculpting. I shall sameface in peace. huzzah#Just like the only thing I ever carve out of avocado pits anymore is eyes. Because that's just whats fun to do. I'm going to accumulate lik#25 similar avocado eyes and have nothing to do with them. I was thinking of stringing some together into a necklace of eyes or something li#like that but.. hrmm... ANYWAY.. Love to do the same things repetitively. :3c
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examining a seemingly normal image only to slowly realize the clear signs of AI generated art.... i know what you are... you cannot hide your true nature from me... go back where you came from... out of my sight with haste, wretched and vile husk
#BEGONE!!! *wizard beam blast leaving a black smoking crater in the middle of the tumblr dashboard*#I think another downside to everyone doing everything on phone apps on shitty tiny screens nowadays is the inability to really see details#of an image and thus its easier to share BLATANTLY fake things like.. even 'good' ai art has pretty obvious tells at this point#but especially MOST of it is not even 'good' and will have details that are clearly off or lines that dont make sense/uneven (like the imag#of a house interior and in the corner there's a cabinet and it has handles as if it has doors that open but there#are no actual doors visible. or both handles are slightly different shapes. So much stuff that looks 'normal' at first glance#but then you can clearly tell it's just added details with no intention or thought behind it. a pattern that starts and then just abruptly#doesn't go anywhere. etc. etc. )#the same thing with how YEARS ago when I followed more fashion type blogs on tumblr and 'colored hair' was a cool ''''New Thing''' instead#of being the norm now basically. and people would share photos of like ombre hair designs and stuff that were CLEARLY photoshop like#you could LITERally see the coloring outside of the lines. blurs of color that extend past the hair line to the rest of the image#or etc. But people would just share them regardless and comment like 'omg i wish I could do this to my hair!' or 'hair goallzzzz!! i#wonder what salon they went to !!' which would make me want to scream and correct them everytime ( i did not lol)#hhhhhhggh... literally view the image on anything close to a full sized screen and You Will SEe#I don't know why it's such a pet peeve of mine. I think just as always I'm obsessed with the reality and truth of things. most of the thing#that annoy me most about people are situations in which people are misinterpreting/misunderstanding how something works or having a misconc#eption about somehting thats easily provable as false or etc. etc. Even if it's harmless for some random woman on facebook to believe that#this AI generated image of a cat shaped coffee machine is actually a real product she could buy somewhere ... I still urgently#wish I could be like 'IT IS ALL AN ILLUSION. YOU SEE???? ITS NOT REALL!!!!! AAAAA' hjhjnj#Like those AI shoes that went around for a while with 1000000s of comments like 'omg LOVE these where can i get them!?' and it's like YOU#CANT!!! YOU CANT GET THEM!!! THEY DONT EXIST!!! THE EYELETS DONT EVEN LINE UP THE SHOES DONT EVEN#MATCH THE PATTERNS ARE GIBBERISH!! HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE THEY ARE NOT REAL!??!!' *sobbing in the rain like in some drama movie*#Sorry I'm a pedantic hater who loves truth and accuracy of interpretation and collecting information lol#I think moreso the lacking of context? Like for example I find the enneagram interesting but I nearly ALWAYS preface any talking about it#with ''and I know this is not scientifically accurate it's just an interesting system humans invented to classify ourselve and our traits#and I find it sociologically fascinating the same way I find religion fascinating'. If someone presented personality typing information wit#out that sort of context or was purporting that enneagram types are like 100% solid scientific truth and people should be classified by the#unquestionaingly in daily life or something then.. yeah fuck that. If these images had like disclaimers BIG in the image description somewh#re like 'this is not a real thing it's just an AI generated image I made up' then fine. I still largely disagree with the ethics behind AI#art but at least it's informed. It's the fact that people just post images w/o context or beleive a falsehood about it.. then its aAAAAAA
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indigodawns · 2 months
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#these are just some thoughts re: friendship as a result of tonight that i need to jot down somewhere but#realising that i really do have a strict and set idea of Good Friend(ship) and what that entails to me#and id written people off bc i wasn't yk ~receiving love or friendship the way id prefer and i was angry with them for that/hurt about it#did i communicate that to them though? nooo. was i fully right in that? also no. like just bc i felt unheard didn't fully mean#that they were doing something wrong. they were trying in their own way (and sometimes they weren't really or it just wasn't nice)#but that's about how we match and how we communicate right? this is so silly that's so basic but it never fully clicked for me like this#i was blaming them for stuff and building up resentment without ever expressing that (and i still haven't yk dhshsjd)#and i think where i went ~wrong was in thinking that bc i felt that way they weren't ~giving me what i need#when it's like... but did i pick up on the ways in which they DID appreciate me and show me love etc? did i give them ANYTHING to work with?#(ok yes occasionally but also... tangent but i was watching a variety show and they were teasing woozi about how#he gives interviewers/hosts literally nothing to work with. like no extra information for them to ask about or tease him for or anything#and i was like ohhhhhh. yeah i do do that sometimes with friends and it's genuinely smth i don't really know how to do like#giving casual information (but not too much and not too little???) so they can then ask questions etc. so then if im like ughh#they never ask (the right) questions or show interest (or let me talk but that's a different thing dhsjdjd) it's like...#well do i give them the chance to? much to think about thank you woozi)#anyways where was i dhsjsnsnsjns idk but it's soooo annoying that i haven't figured this all out yet#but im slowly letting go off a bunch of resentment that has truly no business being here and im trying to self reflect and all that#and im honestly doing so shit some days but others days it's? finding stuff that matters to me on a deeper level ig?#and all of it really does pale in the face of multiple genocides and it's. but yk. if i want to keep fighting#i need to build a strong foundation and sort my shit out as well and be present so im really really trying#and beating my stupid stupid depression and brain with a stick until i get there
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friendofthecrows · 1 year
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I miss that brief golden era from like 2012 to 2016 when the online witchcraft community was actually good and full of open minded people looking to learn more and share what they know plus maybe the occasional vampire middle schooler instead of the situation now where it's been taken over by capitalist tiktok transphobes who like to come up with ways to shift to hogwarts via their inherent magical vagina powers and then sell coated quartz to cure cancer instead of seeing doctors.
#hal rambles#saying controversial things tonight i guess#btw i have done astral projection and at first when i heard about shifting i was like#'oh basically a different name for the same thing?'#then it turns out these guys are just lucid dreaming and thinking that takes them to an entire other universe#like fine enough i don't want to be mean about someone's beliefs#And then i find out about some of the dramas involved and I'm just like o_O#pls use your critical thinking skills#This is way more important when it comes to stuff like herbology though#because not checking side effects dosage etc can legitimately KILL YOU DEAD#and I've seen. So many incredibly stupid things. only to ask for a source and they send me a link to a tiktok...#This is vagueposting about certain friends#Like tiktok 'witchcraft' is completely counter to all the good I've seen in the community last decade#It's ABOUT thinking critically and learning#It's ABOUT exploring ideas that are not the most popular and not taking mainstream beliefs for absolute granted#And so much more!#Yes it can also be about belief and intuition but you have to use that responsibly#Think about why you are tempted to something#Is it actually from your subconscious or some sort of sign or did something online suggest this to you#And that's not to say all internet knowledge is bad - sometimes people do make original and useful observations on here#or compile existing resources/knowledge#But you've got to THINK about it#Same with stuff in books and from people. I'm not the 'it's published so it's automatically legit' type#Sorry for the rant#I'm up a bit too late and i was thinking about it#Time to go dream about killing someone for the Aesthetic and Drama (my favorite lucid dream series)#(and you see - I'm not going into another universe and murdering people via lucid dreaming about it)
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vetyr · 15 days
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hi, i ireally love your work and i don't know if you've answered this before but, what kinds of studies do you do or how did you learn color theory? i wanna get better at rendering and anatomy but im having trouble TT TT
Hi! Long answer alert. Once a chatterbox, always a chatterbox.
When I started actively learning how to draw about 10 1/2 years ago, I exclusively did graphite studies in sketchbooks. Here's a few examples—I mostly stuck to doing line drawings to drill basic shapes/contours and proportions into my brain. The more rendered sketches helped me practice edge control & basic values, and they were REALLY good for learning the actual 3D structure behind what I was drawing.
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I'd use reference images that I grabbed from fitness forums, Instagram, Tumblr, Pinterest, and some NSFW places, but you could find adequate ref material from figure drawing sites like Line of Action. LoA has refs for people (you can filter by clothed/unclothed, age, & gender), animals, expressions, hands/feet, and a few other useful things as well. Love them.
Learning how to render digitally was a similar story; it helped a lot that I had a pretty strong foundation for value/anatomy going in. I basically didn't touch color at all for ~2 years (except for a few attempts at bad digital or acrylic paint studies), which may not have been the best idea. I learned color from a lot of trial and error, honestly, and I'm pretty sure this process involved a lot of imitation—there were a number of digital/traditional painters whose styles I really wanted to emulate (notably their edge control, color choices, value distributions, and shape design), so I kiiind of did a mixture of that + my own experimentation.
For example, I really found Benjamin Björklund's style appealing, especially his softened/lost edges & vibrant pops of saturated color, so here's a study I did from some photograph that I'm *pretty* sure was painted with him in mind.
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Learning how to detail was definitely a slow process, and like all the aforementioned things (anatomy/color/edge control/values/etc.) I'm still figuring it out. Focusing on edge control first (that is, deciding on where to place hard/soft edges for emphasizing/de-emphasizing certain areas of the image) is super useful, because you can honestly fool a viewer into thinking there's more detail in a piece than there actually is if you're very economical about where you place your hard edges.
The most important part, to me, is probably just doing this stuff over and over again. You're likely not going to see improvement in a few weeks or even a few months, so don't fret about not getting the exact results you want and just keep studying + making art. I like to think about learning art as a process where you *need* to fail and make crappy art/studies—there's literally no way around it—so you might as well fail right now. See, by making bad art you're actually moving forward—isn't that a fun prospect!!
It's useful to have a folder with art you admire, especially if you can dissect the pieces and understand why you like them so much. You can study those aspects (like, you can redraw or repaint that person's work) and break down whether this is art that you just like to look at, or if it's the kind of art that you want to *make.* There's a LOT of art out there that I love looking at, probably tens of thousands of styles/mediums, but there's a very narrow range that I want to make myself.
I've mentioned it in some ask reply in the past, but I really do think looking at other artist's work is such a cheat code for improving your own skills—the other artist does the work to filter reality/ideas for you, and this sort of allows you to contact the subject matter more directly. I can think of so many examples where an artist I admired exaggerated, like, the way sunlight rested on a face and created that orange fringe around its edge, or the greys/dull blues in a wheat field, or the bright indigo in a cast shadow, or the red along the outside of a person's eye, and it just clicked for me that this was a very available & observable aspect of reality, which had up until that point gone completely unnoticed! If you're really perceptive about the art you look at, it's shocking how much it can teach you about how to see the world (in this particular case I mean this literally, in that the art I looked at fully changed the way I visually processed the world, but of course it has had a strong effect on my worldviews/relationships/beliefs).
Thanks so much for sending in a question (& for reading, if you got this far)! I read every single ask I receive, including the kind words & compliments, which I genuinely always appreciate. Best of luck with learning, my friend :)
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dvrk-moon · 2 months
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ENHYPEN OT7 ; 엔하이픈
PLAYING MINECRAFT WITH THEM
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requested : no
genre : crack, fluff
pairing : enhypen x reader (can be platonic)
warnings : cursing + the members being menaces
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heeseung ; 희승
absolute sweat
like speed runner esque
nags on you for being too slow and making him have a speed run time of over fifteen minutes
like you’re barely getting an oak log and he’s already in the nether. like u turn away for two seconds and he’s already built the portal
“heeseung where did you go” “i’ve almost killed the wither wait” … “CAN U CHILL OUT WE JUST CREATED THIS WORLD”
so u thought u were gonna have fun hanging out with heeseung on minecraft? NO
because as soon as he finishes his speed run and you finally got your first diamond, he’s decided to build a base
and u thought he was gonna be all cute and make u a room awwww!!! no.
he does make u a room, but the stairway up to ur room is a parkour course
(when the fuck did he have time to even make that?!!?!!)
first and last time playing minecraft with him
jay ; 제이
absolute knight in shining armor
literally
those mobs have nothing on his iron drip
protects u even if u don’t need it
“oh shit there’s a creeper” “ON MY WAY Y/N”
his netherite sword is CRACKED. like perfect enchantments
when he’s not protecting u he becomes ur farmer
the farm is so organized and beautiful jay is literally my husband pls
does in fact laugh when u die tho
like he’ll collect your stuff for you but the second he sees “[your gamertag] fell from a high place” he’s going to laugh for like two minutes straight
also he keeps an extra chest in his room for u
like in case u need something OR u die and he’s not able to collect ur stuff so it despawns
jay is so husband. even in minecraft
jake ; 제이크
he’s played before ok (trust him)
(it was when he was like nine)
like he’s very very. bad
he’s trying tho!!!
keeps dying. like every two minutes you see “jake_awesome2002 was blown up by a creeper”
he does not know how to change his gamertag so ur just stuck playing with jake_awesome2002
he starts getting the hang of it and immediately thinks he’s cracked at the game (he’s not)
so he disappears from you out of nowhere and so you try to help him :
“jake where are you” … “jake” … “jake sim where the fuck are you” …………. “i don’t know”
(cue “jake_awesome2002 fell out of the world”)
“JAKE HOW DID YOU FALL OUT OF THE WORLD” “I DONT KNOW”
he respawns and like sulks for three minutes before leaving and collecting dirt(?) for some reason
coincidentally you keep finding dirt blocks placed throughout your base afterwards! how silly of him!
sunghoon ; 성훈
he was so ready to show u how good he is
he’s not very good. but at least he’s better than jake!
he somehow is always in a cave or some sort of dangerous location
like say u found a village and you’re like “sunghoon come raid this village with me!”
meanwhile he’s trying not to die because of a pillager outpost
somehow he doesn’t?
he’ll go and do stuff like that or spend days in the nether and survive but his weakness is witches
like he doesn’t scream UNLESS there is a witch
and if you’re nearby ? he will 100% sacrifice you to the witch so that he can survive
womp womp
he actually sacrifices you quite a bit because he has like 36 levels
he thinks he’s funny when he does it too
sunoo ; 선우
honestly prefers to play in creative mode (me too sunoo)
but when you were like “let’s play in survival for once” he’s like “fiiiiiiiiinneeeeeuhhhh” (very dramatic about it)
he immediately builds a forever base when you spawn in
makes you do all the mining and stuff
he will tag along! but he won’t do shit
he’s the interior designer. he’s got bigger and better things to do
he only redeems himself when you go into the base and find your minecraft beds right next to each other
besides holding the house down, he also has an extremely high scale and successful farming system
so if you ever check in his chests, 100% you will find like 20 stacks of wood, stacks of wheat, of carrots, of beets, etc.
may be a homebody in minecraft but at least he’s fun to play with !!!! 10/10 would recommend to a friend
jungwon ; 정원
the miner
like you’re trying to get along with your day until jungwon stops and drops into the smallest cave ever
“what are u doing” “wait y/n we might need this copper” “jungwon don’t u already have like three stacks of copper” “yeah but we might need it”
lots of time spent mining
u eat your words tho when he is decked out in diamond armor from almost the get-go
when you guys build a base it HAS to have a little mine under the house (little as in huge)
somehow has like ten dogs?
“this one is maeumi, this one is maeumi’s friend, this once can be gaeul… maybe this one can be layla? oh! and this one is maeumi’s other friend. this one is bisco. this one is yours but you don’t get to name it. i will name it for you.”
they would be cats if it was really up to you but you’ll live
also refuses to elaborate on this thing he does
he makes tons and tons of signs and just places them around the base
some of them make sense and others just don’t at all
has a 2x2 fenced in area and the sign outside of it says “jail”
has anyone ever been sent to jail there? no. but as jungwon says “just in case”
riki ; 니키
possibly the worst yet most fun person to play with
at first you’re like “let’s play together” and he’s like “yeah sure whatever” but little do u know he has every plan in the world to turn the game into warfare
it’s even worse if you are playing on a realm rather than just a server
he abandons you from the get-go and immediately runs away and you can’t catch him so he builds a base far away from you
the base is in fact a dirt house
but it’s minecraft who said he had to be an architect
yes he abandoned you and is regularly attacking you at any given chance but he still keeps his tabs on where you are
walks all over your farm and kills your livestock
leaves signs saying “riki was here” “get rikrolled”
since he keeps tabs on you, u have to be very cautious of what you leave in your chests
he will steal anything. just for fun
threatens to blow up everything because he just wants to
little does he know if he wants warfare ur gonna give him warfare
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a/n : this is random but i played mc like two days ago and i thought this could be a silly idea
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AITA for breaking up with my boyfriend because he’s hypersexual?
nsft/nsfw warning - mentions of sex, manipulation, etc.
🦷
(to find later)
I (19m) just broke up with my boyfriend (18m) of over one and a half years last night.
For context, I’m demisexual and he’s known this from the very beginning. Plus, I’m a transgender guy and when we first got together I was at the very start of my transition and still extremely uncomfortable with my body. So, sex was just kind of out of the question, and I made that very clear.
Nonetheless, whenever we cuddled he still got all touchy, kissed my neck and begged me to take my clothes off, etc. Whenever I protested, he got all whiny and did that weird puppy eyes thing. He usually gave up after a while and apologized, but it always left me feeling guilty and like I was depriving him of something.
After a while, he told me he’s hypersexual and he’s sorry if he gets a little "too much" sometimes. But he reassured me that he loves me and even if we never get intimate, he wants to be with me. I believed him.
Still, his behavior continued and after a while I just gave in and took my clothes off for him, let him kiss me… you get it. When I put my shirt back on I asked if he was happy now and he got all upset. He was pouting and told me that he never forced me to do anything and he wants me to enjoy these things too. It’s true, he never forced me to do anything but he always got all touchy feely and it made me feel like I had to give him something.
As the relationship progressed, I just resorted to giving him oral to satisfy him but he always insisted on returning the favor. The thing is, I was his first relationship and he didn’t have much experience. So, whenever he tried anything, I barely felt anything. Even with tons of communication and showing him how to do things. It just left me feeling gross and unsatisfied.
At some point, I decided I had to let him do the full thing. (stupid, I know, but I’m an insecure 19 year old) So, we did it and I hated it. It felt uncomfortable and he didn’t even try to give me any sort of pleasure, he just ran off to take a shower after he finished. I cried in his bed that night but never told him about it. I just pretended to be okay and to like this stuff.
When I told him I wanted to get top surgery, he begged me not to get it or to get the keyhole procedure so I don’t lose feeling in my nipples. Because it’s the only way he’s ever been able to give me pleasure. I don’t really wanna spell it out, but yeah.
When I told him that being shirtless during the nasty made me wanna cry, he told me that he never asked me to take my shirt or binder off. I just did it. But the thing is, I did it because he liked it. Never once did he apologize or comfort me. It just made me feel disgusting and extremely dysphoric.
He always blamed all his behavior on being hypersexual and not being able to control himself when I’m so cute. Or whatever…
So, I made up my mind to break up with him. The thing is, I know all of this makes him sound horrible. But he was genuinely a good boyfriend and I love him a lot. So, I feel like shit for breaking up with him just because he’s hypersexual. I tried to talk to him about it and find a solution, but he never changed despite promising to do so. I don’t really see what else I could’ve done.
Am I the asshole for this? I’d appreciate it if other hypersexual people could give me their opinions on this! Because I don’t want to believe that this is how hypersexual people usually act.
What are these acronyms?
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impishjesters · 6 months
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Jax-in-a-box
warning(s): mentioned spicy jokes/comments note(s): (In response to the request) We don't have Jack in the box around here so I actually had to google it, thought it sounded familiar lol A/N: This idea was so cute and I had so much fun writing it. It is sort of implied the reader is attached to said box, but not how. But now I am imagining them hopping around like the Pixar lamp so that’s hilarious. If you want more hc's of the reader detached from the box feel free to send in another request~ request: I'm requesting a Jax x reader (crushing and actual relationship stage if possible) where they are kinda Jack in the box theme (no not like the restaurant mascot, I was telling my friend about this idea/request and she thought I was talking about him 😭) So the reader is the tallest of the group and has long hair, similar to the rope-likeness to Ragatha’s hair and they also have very stretchy arms and can do a bunch of things with them (wrap one of them completely around a person, can reach the top of the tent etc.) The reader also likes to stay in their box most of the time since it's dark and peaceful but isn't like antisocial, likes to hang out with the others and does light hearted pranks on them (Jax included, no one is safe).
Crushing Stage
You aren’t on the same level of jackassery or prankage that Jax is, but you do have a knack for more light-hearted pranks and that’s admirable because he always gets a good laugh out of whoever you prank.
Though that’s not saying much, all of them have been subjected to a jumpscare or two by you, trying to approach you when you are in your box really is unpredictable.
Like did you not hear them or are you intentionally trying to jumpscare someone? (It’s usually the first one, the walls aren’t thick but they can muffle when someone is trying to directly talk to you.)
Actually, the first time you scared Jax it was completely unintentional. Sometimes you sort of just, blend into the scenery when your box is tucked alongside other stuff. You didn’t even know he was there when you popped out and just, scared him.
Fortunately for him, nobody else was around because the sound that left him was priceless. He hates it (affectionately) that you use that to tease him every now and then.
Another time that you startled (read: scared) him was when you were hanging off the ground, he hadn’t been aware you were quite literally hanging around until you dropped down, the box making a comically loud noise in the process. (Which is funny because that time others were around, luckily Jax didn’t scream.)
The more he gets comfortable with you the more he finds himself leaning against your box during group socializing time or even letting you wrap one of your arms around him and yoink him around (usually out of harm’s way, Caine’s games are too much sometimes)
In the fashion that “a boy tugs on a girl’s hair because he likes her”, Jax has very much tugged your hair—it’s long and there’s a lot of it so it doesn’t always get in the box when you close the top. So parts stick out and he’s definitely let that part of his brain act on the “what if I just..yank it?”
Afterward, he just does it because he likes that your attention turns directly on him. It’s never a violent tug or anything, just enough to get your eyes on him.
Dating Stage
Not too much changes when the two of you start dating. There are still pranks but the two of you are closer and whatnot.
However, there is the new addition of more risque jokes/comments, such as the comment about whether cranking the handle on your box does something. (The first joke happens whether those kinds of comments discomfort you or not, though he’ll stop if they do. But if they don’t? Oh boy, expect so many awful jokes.)
At first, he had no opinion, but he kinda likes that you’re taller than him. The only other person is Kinger and he’s usually hunched over.
He finds your stretchy arms to be both useful and entertaining, though seeing them stretch to extreme lengths kinda bugs him out. (which is ironic because he’s a stretchy toy himself)
Along with leaning against your box, now he’s more comfortable actually sitting on it, or rather the ledge of it when it’s open.
He’s definitely sat on it while it was closed before though, you may or may not have accidentally thrown him off. (he’s irritated, but honestly, he should’ve seen that coming)
On occasion when the gang is stuck playing some dumb game that he’s not really paying attention to, he’ll sit on the ledge of your box and mess with your hair. It’s similar to Ragatha’s but longer and it’s a nice time-waster just seeing what he can do with it.
Since you tend to stay in your box more than your actual room, it makes finding you at times a pain. Sometimes Jax gives up, sometimes he asks where someone saw you last, and sometimes he just yells out. The first few times it’s all fun and games but afterward, he just gets irritated, it’s like you move around just to piss him off.
For whatever reason in the beginning he never questioned how exactly you worked, you know, being in a box, or part of a box? Expect plenty of questions and the occasional attempted peek into your box to see if you have legs (maybe a spring?) or not. (he’s not trying to be dirty he’s just intrigued.)
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msgexymunson · 2 years
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Keep Up With Me
Sub!Eddie x Dom!Fem!Reader
Description: your boyfriend breaking up with you because you're too much for him to handle might be the best thing that's happened to you. It's certainly the best thing that's happened to Eddie!
A/N: bitta angst, mostly smut, best friends to lovers, not me and my horny ass projecting again promise, I'm English excuse my language tally ho what what
Warnings: use of pet names (baby girl, sweetheart etc) reader uses she/her pronouns, NSFW, minors DNI or I'll smack you with a wet fish, F!Masturbation, lap riding, M!Oral receiving, slight M! Orgasm denial, p in v protected sex
5k words
Masterlist
You perch on the corner of the checkout counter at Family Video, legs swinging, fingers tapping on the side.
"So, apparently that makes me some sort of slut." You looked at Robin, one of your closest friends, and shrugged.
"Shit, what an asshole! So he basically dumped you because he couldn't keep up with you?"
"Yup. Sad ain't it." You inspect your fingernails, trying to come off as more aloof than you actually felt. You weren't in pain as such, not from losing that asshole, it's just his words kept ringing in your head.
Why do you want to fuck all the time? Must be some sorta slut. Are you a freak or something? What's wrong with you?
The harsh, sobering words ran through your head on a loop, wearing you down even further.
"Hey, I know that look, stop thinking about that jerk he did NOT deserve you, seriously! You just gotta find someone else, you always do." Robin stares at you, hand hovering over yours.
"That's the problem aint it. I just do this over and over. Too fricking horny for my own good!" You laugh; Robin giggles with you. "Hey there's worse problems to have!" You both chuckle for a bit, but you're still upset about his words. Slut. Freak. "Maybe I am a freak." You sigh.
"Whose a freak?"
You jump, and look around. Eddie Munson, your other best friend and long time crush, had just walked in the door. He flashed you a lazy smile, brown doe eyes creased at the corners.
"We are not talking about you Edward if that's what you think."
Eddie mimes being shot in the chest. "Oh sweetheart you wound me! Don't call me that." He pouts at you.
"It's your name, isn't it?" You poke your tongue out at him.
"Urgh, yeah, government name, but it's so not metal." He picks you up off the counter and spins you round, whilst you squeal.
"Put me down Edward!"
"Whose Edward?" He grins, still holding you, lightly tickling your sides.
"Okay Eddie please!"
He places you on your feet with exaggerated care, brushing imaginary dust of your shoulders.
Robin's eyes flick between yours and Eddie, widening and gesturing her head at you. You know she's dying to say something, but you had told her a million times, Eddie was just a friend. Sure he did shit like that, but it's like you were his little sister or something. There's no way he felt the same way about you.
"Well if you two are done flirting, I've got a job to do." You open your mouth to protest but Robin smirks, grabs a few videos and runs off like a baby deer to shelve them. looking at Eddie, you see his face is flushed. Silence for a heartbeat.
"So aren't you seeing loverboy tonight?" Eddie waggles his eyebrows at you.
"Oh I've just come from EX loverboy's house. Here to pick a horror film and pretend all the victims have his face. Oh and eat ice cream until I'm sick."
"Oh shit sweetheart I didn't know, sorry."
"It's all good, just trying to get some stuff he said out of my head. He's a dick anyway."
Eddie frowns, his brow furrowing. He knows this is affecting you more than you are letting on but he doesn't question it.
"Look, I've got a deal to do, but do you want to come over? I can drop you at mine and I'll be like 20 minutes max. I'm up for horror movies, ice cream and a joint or two?"
"Sounds good Eddie. Thanks."
"No problem sweetheart."
You pick a movie each and summon Robin from her hiding space to check them out.
"Okay you kids have fun!" She beams at you both, waving over enthusiastically.
"Robin you are such a dork." You laugh and leave, turning back to make sure the door shuts and doesn't leave a draught. Robin's still staring at you two, gesturing and putting her thumbs up. You roll your eyes and make your way to Eddie's van.
*******************************
Eddie, true to his word, dropped you off at his trailer. You were standing in his room, all alone since his uncle was at work. It was odd; you'd been here before several times, but never alone. You sat on Eddie's bed, surrounded by his smell. Laying back against the pillows you grab one and drink in the scent. Okay you've definitely crossed over into freak territory. He wasn't even here and you were obsessed; surrounded and engulfed by his scent. You felt a familiar warmth between your legs, your desire growing for him with each passing second. You hadn't even realised you had unbuttoned your jeans until your fingers met your underwear.
What the hell are you doing he'll be back any second! Despite knowing this, it gave you a little thrill to think he might catch you with your hand down your pants. Maybe he'd finally give you what you've been craving. Working your hand into your underwear, you find your clit with a gasp. You already felt wetness creeping from your folds, desire being something that seemed to run hot within you, all the time. Teasing at your clit, you run your fingertips in soft circles, building up that tingling feeling in your core.
Throwing your head back you groaned softly, increasing the pressure on your sensitive bud. You imagined it was Eddie's fingers doing this, rubbing you, teasing you into an orgasm. It definitely helped. Soon you were panting, chasing your release.
Your mind races, thinking about how he picked you up earlier so effortlessly, you thought about his strong hands holding you firmly, rings pressing into your flesh. You think about what it would feel like, his hands on you whilst you grind against him and that did it. You come undone with your own hand, your release shattering through your nerves. Laying there for a moment you gather yourself, feeling a twinge of guilt. You shouldn't be thinking about your best friend like this. Maybe there was something wrong with you.
Freak. Slut.
No time to unpack all of that, hearing the crunch of gravel outside. The front door opens.
"Hey honey I'm home!" Eddie chuckles, and you hear him coming towards his room. You quickly try look less dishevelled, wiping your hand and hoping against hope that what you just did wasn't written all over your face.
Eddie struts in, chucks his metal lunchbox on the bed and throws himself after it. You can't help but laugh at his exaggerated movements.
He lays there on his side, propping himself up on his elbow.
"Ya miss me?" He grins.
"Always." You smile at him, trying your hardest not to appear flustered.
"So, I'll roll, you pick what to watch, and we'll make a nest."
You laugh at that. "A nest? What am I an egg?"
"Just do what you're told baby girl." Jesus that's a new one. That nickname went straight to your cunt. He sits up, cross legged. "Oh and hand me those papers on the bed side table."
You bend across and grasp the papers, passing them to Eddie. For a fraction of a second he looks down and looks back up at you, face flushed pink.
"By all means get comfortable." He coughs and looks away.
You look down and realise you left your jeans unbuttoned. A small triangle of red is exposed from the front of your black jeans. Trust me to pick bright red underwear today. Flushing magenta, you try and cover your tracks.
"Shit, sorry Eddie the jeans were digging in you know."
"No worries princess, you want a pair of sweat pants? You need to be cosy in our nest" he grins at you.
"Sure, thanks Eds." 
He grabs you a clean grey pair from a drawer and you go to the bathroom to change, cursing yourself for being so stupid. When you return, sweats hanging low of your hips, he had rolled and was waiting for you with a lighter in hand.
"Shit Eddie you could have started without me."
"Nuh-uh. This is all for your benefit, and I'm a gentleman. The lady gets first toke." He reaches over once you've sat down and puts the joint in your mouth and lights it. You take a drag, holding it in for a couple of seconds, then release it. You take another, deeper toke.
"Wow this is decent." You smirk at him.
"All my stuff is decent babe."
"Oh so we aren't talking about the other week with that shit that was all twiggy?"
"No idea what you're talking about." He looks pointedly in the opposite direction. You snort at his actions and pick the first film, loading the VCR.
You both lay back, arms touching, watching the film. The joint goes back and forth, and you begin to giggle at the movie, feeling your high settle in. Laughing with each other at the ridiculous plot, you feel so much better about everything that had happened that evening. You were with Eddie. He always made you feel at ease.
Once the movie had finished Eddie started rolling another, and you ejected the film to put the next one in.
"So, you ready to tell me what happened?" Eddie asks, licking the spliff into place.
Your eyes go wide thinking about what you did in his bed. Shit, how did he know?
"What- what do you mean?"
"I mean why did lover boy break it with you? You never said."
Relief started to spread through you, then you remembered the reasons. Freak. Slut. No way you could tell Eddie that. It was too embarrassing.
"Just standard guy commitment shit. Nothing new." You try and brush it off. It might have worked with someone else, but Eddie could always tell when you are lying.
"Nope, nope. You weren't even serious, you said. So go on, tell me?" His soft brown eyes bored into you.
You started to feel hot and bothered at this amount of attention.
"He said some stuff, it wasn't nice, I don't want to go through it again."
"Did you tell Robin?"
Ooft. How did he always know?
"Okay he said some... stuff that got to me. Jesus Eddie its not important!"
Eddie strokes your arm and looks you in the eye, "if it wasn't important it wouldn't have gotten to you. I just, I want to help."
You look into his eyes and see pure love there, and it does help. You take a deep breath, and, looking anywhere other than Eddie's eyes, you explain the real reason for the break up. Eddie sits silently, listening to you recount the events. When you are done, he looks at you and begins to smirk.
"Eddie it's not funny." You scowl at him. That throws Eddie over the edge. He laughs out loud, tears gathering at the corners of his eyes. Feeling embarrassed, you move to get up. Eddie's hands grab your waist, holding you still.
"I'm so sorry, sweetheart, I'm not laughing at you I swear." He's grinning, face slightly red from his outburst.
You stare at him. "Then what the hell are you laughing at?"
He chuckles a bit, then strokes your arm, "it's just, it's like he's gotten rid of any man's wet dream, seriously. What man doesn't want a hot girlfriend who wants to do him all the time? He's clearly fucking crazy."
"You- you think I'm hot?" You stutter at him.
"Of course, look at you, you're fucking incredible. Baby girl, any man would be lucky to have you."
Part of you thinks this is just Eddie being a good friend, but the way he looks at you and the lingering hand on your hip; that tells a different story. You decide to push it a little further.
"Any man, right?' You look into his eyes.
"That's what I said sweetheart."
"So, that includes long haired, metal loving, tattooed men right?" You look up at him through your lashes.
"I mean yeah if that's your type..." you see the penny drop behind his eyes. "Oooh, Er yes, those too. Maybe lead guitarist men. Men who like to play D&D?" His voice getting higher. He tilts his head to one side, looking at you with hopeful doe eyes.
"You think there's guys like that in Hawkins?" Batting your eyelashes at him, you move closer.
"Well, I can certainly think of one or two," he says, moving one hand to the nape of your neck, stroking your skin.
"Well, give me their numbers and I'll mmmph!" Your reply is muffled as he presses his lips onto yours.
His touch is electric, the feel of his lips on yours heated. It's more than you could have ever dreamt, the passion of the kiss is something you've never experienced before.
You press your tongue into his mouth and deepen the kiss. Eddie's hand holds you by the hip, fingers pressing into your sides, rings warming against your hot skin. You need to feel him closer so you move to straddle him, but in your eagerness you manage to push him onto his back. Leaning into him, legs either side of his hips, never breaking the kiss. You caress his chest with one hand, the other moving to grab him by the waist, as if he could get any closer without being inside you.
Both of your breathing becomes laboured, desperate. You break the kiss, panting at each other. Eddie's face is a picture, he looks like he's in heaven. A stupid grin is plastered across his features.
"So I've wanted to do that since forever." He beams at you, hand moving to cup your jaw.
"Why didn't you?" You frown at him.
"I dunno, I just thought you weren't interested in me like that."
You look down at him, gesturing to how you were straddling him. "Well, I mean, you're okay I suppose..." you tease him.
Eddie thrusts up with his hips, rubbing against your clothed pussy. You feel he is hard, almost busting through his jeans, and you whimper.
"Seems I'm a bit more than okay pretty girl." Eddie smirks at you.
"Shut up Eddie." The teasing that was a daily occurrence between the two of you puts you at ease. You hold him by the shoulders, and grind your core over his hardened cock, back and forth. Eddie groans low in his throat, his eyes rolling back.
"Jesus Christ, shutting up." You laugh at him, and reach to pull your top over your head, exposing your red cotton bra. It's just plain, soft cups with the tiniest bow on the front. Eddie gazes at your chest as if it were clad in the finest lingerie. You continue to rock against him, feeling your own pleasure mount up.
"You're gonna be the death of me sweetheart" he says but there's no malice in it, just pure admiration. You smirk at him and start planting kisses on his chest, fingers feathering their way to his belt. You undo it and his jeans, yanking them down to his knees, and continue leaving hot, open mouthed kisses to his stomach. Your fingers dip into the waistband of his boxers and you look up at him for confirmation. Eddie stares at you open mouthed for a second, then nods frantically. You smile back at him and bite your lip, pulling his underwear down slowly.
His member springs out to greet you, bigger than average but what really surprised you was the girth of it. You couldn't help but feel your pussy clenching around nothing in anticipation. Licking a pointed stripe from the base to the tip, you massage his balls with your hand. Eddie's head rolled back, his eyes scrunched shut. Lowering your mouth onto the tip, you swirl your tongue around it, licking up his pre cum. Eddie's groan was borderline pornographic. You look up at him and slowly take him into your mouth, using your hands for what didn't fit. Bobbing up and down on his length, you use your tongue to massage him. You'd wanted to feel his dick on your tongue for so long, this almost didn't feel real. There was something about being in control of Eddie's pleasure that made you feel extremely powerful. You could feel his cock twitching already, Eddie was practically whimpering. You could tell he was close.
"Baby girl, shit, I can't take much more, I'm gonna-"
You pull away with a wet pop, Eddie whimpering at the loss of your mouth.
"Baby girl please please." Eddie looks a mess, his face is red, his breathing coming out in heavy pants, trying to grab at your arm, side, anything he could reach.
"Patience baby", your voice dripping honey.
You fling your sweats off and move up him, straddling him in your underwear. Not letting him enter you. Not yet. You were enjoying dominating him.
You start to grind down on his length again, making Eddie whine.
"Please-" Eddie looks at you, breathless and pouting.
"No." You smirk at him. Eddie gasps and looks at you in surprise. You continue to rub  your wet heat against him, "I was thinking about this earlier, wanted to find out what it felt like," grinning, grinding your cunt against his rock hard dick, feeling your slick drench your underwear and him.
Eddie's falling apart in front of your eyes. You unclasp your bra, letting it fall. Eddie's eyes widen and he whimpers, thrusting against you. You let out a moan.
"Touch me Eddie." He wastes no time in grabbing at your chest, smoothing rough fingertips over your hardened nipples. You feel a familiar sensation, a burning in your stomach and chest, desire building and building, setting your insides ablaze.
You increase your pace, rubbing back and forth, your wetness soaking Eddie, making him a slippery mess. You feel him twitch under you, fingers pinching your nipples almost painfully and it sends you over the edge. You cry out his name, your hands in your hair, still riding him, extending the outrageous feeling.
Eddie's hands suddenly grasp your hips, hard. You open your eyes and look down just as his scrunch shut. He comes then, violently with an exaggerated moan. His own release pebbles his stomach, your stomach, even a smattering reaches his chest. You look down at him as you come down from your respective highs, and you both start laughing.
"Well, I've never come like that before." Eddie's stroking your sides, gazing at you in disbelief.
You laugh, and get up off him, readjusting your underwear. You go to the bathroom to clean yourself off, and return with a dampened wash cloth. You kneel beside him, wash cloth hovering over him.
"You gonna help me or just stare baby girl" he smirked, poking you in the ribs, his other hand gesturing to the mess on his stomach.
"Hey, just admiring my masterpiece. Have to take a picture next time." You watch as Eddie's mouth springs open, his face turning purple. You simply hum and wipe him down, passing him the cloth to get anything you missed.
"Holy shit, I was right. You are literally every guys wet dream. Fuck. You're a-a pervert!" He points at you dramatically.
Laughing loud at that, you flop down next to him. He turns on his side and strokes your face, moving a couple of stray hairs.
Feeling self conscious for a moment, you look at him, cheeks flushed slightly.
"You don't mind then?"
"Mind? Mind?? I think I won the lottery." He beams at you and brings you in for a kiss.
"So you wont mind what I meant, when I said I thought about that earlier?" You're testing him, seeing if this could actually work. And you want to see the look on his face.
"Oh please for all that is good tell me." He practically pants at you.
You giggle, "well when you dropped me off I had some time to fill, so I might have touched myself thinking of you."
The groan that escapes Eddie's lips travels straight to your core. He envelopes you in a fiery kiss.
"Jesus baby girl, fuck!" He rubs your back, one hand snaking into your hair, pulling it. "In my bed?" You nod. "So yeah I'm hard again."
You laugh, "looks like you weren't kidding when you thought you could keep up with me," you smile smugly at him.
He pushes you onto your back in response and starts to nip and lick at your neck, leaving opened mouthed kisses in his wake.
"Oh I can keep up with you baby girl, trust me."
Then he's mounting you, the tip of his cock begging for entry.
"Someone's eager, have you got protection?"  You raise your eyebrows at him.
"Yes, God yes, please baby please." His eyes dart to his bedside table.
You push at him, smiling, teasing him, "so you're all confident until you have any pressure at all, I see. Lay back then baby."
He immediately lies on his back, quiet and unassuming, holding his cock by the base. He looks painfully hard but he's not moving a muscle, looking at you for your say so. You feel immensely powerful, gazing at him in such compliant position.
You reach to the drawer at his bedside, rummaging through.
"Oh, what do we have here?" You exclaim, pulling out a dirty magazine, folded to the centre. You cant help but notice the model's hair is just like yours.
"Hmm, she's hot I'll give you that. Kinda looks a little like me eh?" You wink at him mischievously.
He blushes crimson at you in reply.
"I, I suppose I have a type?" He shrugs, face red as a beetroot.
You can help but laugh, "I'm just flattered baby." And then you find his condoms. You pull one out and rip it from its packaging using your teeth.
"So, you gonna be a good boy?" You question, it almost being a joke but you receive a very certain "yes ma'am!" As a response.
You cant help but chuckle, "oh, so the dungeon master wants someone in control, I see how it is," and you grab the base of his painfully hard member.
"Please...' Eddie nearly drools out of the side of his mouth in response.
"Hmmm its good to hear you beg. Well I suppose I'll humour you. For now," you smirk out the corner of your mouth. You roll the condom onto his hard cock. He hisses at the friction. You line him up to your entrance, straddling him.
As you slowly lower yourself onto his hardness, he cries out at the sensation. You see his eyes screwed shut in response, his cheeks flushed pink. You already feel obsessed by the look of him as he entered you. You want to record this forever, the moment you finally got to take your crush. The moment you realised you could completely take control of him; everything you'd ever dreamed of. He's compliant, melting to your touch. You take him into your cunt until you're sitting on him fully. He's buried in you to the hilt, stretching you. Its bordering on pain given his size, but delicious in itself. It's a good pain.
You hold him by the waist, almost possessively. Searching his eyes as he meets your gaze, you see tears gathering at the edges of his eyes, flustered and fucked out already. The look on his eyes is pleading, almost praying.
"Mother of God, fuck...."
"I thought we settled on ma'am?"
"No.... definitely seeing God... baby..." it's a shadow of Eddie's usual humour.
You giggle at him, a sound seemingly innocent, considering Eddie is buried deep inside your pussy. You start to slowly move against him, bouncing up and down on his length, grinding against him every so often. Eddie's eyes roll back, he grabs you firmly by the hips, rocking you back and forth. You take a deliberate, pounding pace against him and feel your release begin to build again.
Eddie is babbling, passionately holding you as tight as he can.
"Jesus, baby girl, you feel so tight and warm, fuck."
Eddie's words of encouragement and blissed out face spur you on. You take him harder, faster, gripping onto him with your fingertips. Every thrust bringing you to ecstasy. You can feel him through every fibre of your being, deep within your core. You cry out in pleasure, the feeling of Eddie in every nerve. Moaning and writhing above him, you know you're about to cum, your walls flexing around him, squeezing his length. Eddie whimpers and you practically scream, your pleasure coming to a head, the feeling pulsating through your every limb, taking over control. Your body rocks in absolute rapture. You shake and stroke his sides as you come down.
"Fuck, Eddie, oh my God." You quiver above him, legs shaking.
"Baby, please can I get on top of you. Please." He looks up at you, wide eyes beseeching you. How could you say no to that face?
"Go on, whatever you want." You remember his reaction from earlier, " you've been such a good boy."
Eddie practically growls at that, flipping you onto your back.
He finds your entrance, slipping back into you deeply with a groan. You pull one leg over his shoulder, the other hitched around his waist and see his eyes roll back. He thrusts into you, deep and slow, planting open mouthed kisses onto your calf.
You stare at his face, one hand cupping his jaw. He's pink tinged, sweating, wild eyed.
"Hey, Eddie, baby, look at me. You're being such a good boy, taking me, using me so well baby."
"Fuck yes" Eddie breathes, his eyes now fixated with yours, grounding him. "Thank you thank you thank you." He chants as his thrusts get faster and sloppier. He grabs onto your hips, plunging as hard into you as he can, and you feel a mounting desire burning in the depths of your stomach.
"Eddie yes fucking me so well, oh God baby, I'm gonna cum so hard." Your words of encouragement send him over the edge; with a stutter and a high pitched moan he comes, shaking and gripping you tight. He continues to thrust in you though, looking at your face, brow furrowed. It must feel too much but he wants, needs you to come again. You grab him by the ass and push him into you as far as he will go, arching your back, releasing a toe curling moan as you orgasm.
You both try and slow your breathing as you move your leg from his shoulder, still quivering.
"Jesus Christ, baby girl that was... wow" Eddie chuckled in disbelief.
"Yeah? That good huh?" You smiled up at him, stroking a stray hair from his face.
"I just... if I knew you were gonna be so..."
"So what?" You frown at him.
"So... in charge! I mean, fuck that was... wow." He grinned at you, and you see your Eddie again. He rolls off you and disposes of the condom.
"What would you have done?" You smile at him, grabbing the blanket to cover yourself up.
"Well, probably just thought about it a whole lot until you made a move." You laugh at that.
"Eddie that's what happened."
"Hmmm, impeccable logic. Still, you had no right keeping this to yourself."
You laugh and throw a pillow at him. He pretends its heavy and it knocks him to the bed. He wiggles underneath it, seemingly pinned. You crawl over to him, moving the pillow, and cage him in with your arms.
"So, I'll roll, you put the movie on, and then round three yeah?" You tilt your head with the question.
"Fuck baby girl you really are gonna be the death of me. But what a way to go!"
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majimasleftasscheek · 6 months
Note
Hihi! Do you have any minedai headcanons? (Idk how to write aAAAAA)
hmmm I had to give this a good think cuz I normally don't obsess about them too much (compared to a certain other pair lmao) but here's what I got 👀
*note! gonna be a mix of silly and more realistic ideas. my interpretation of minedai is pretty unserious
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Daigo
genuinely enjoys mine's company, as uptight and neurotic it may be. because daigo was given the chairman position, a lot of people don't respect him other than mine so it's nice to hang out with someone who, despite being overly respectful, is kind to him. he feels a lot at ease with mine, able to be more himself n all that. it's not much but it means a lot to daigo
that said, he totally goes out in his casual clothes when able and is still very goth coded. Mine makes intense but silent notes about every little thing in those outfits and thinks it's very cute when there's little details like tiny skulls n things
likes to do go out spontaneously when he can and takes mine along. mine thinks something like that is way too dangerous for a chairman to be doing but daigo confides that he's not worried if mine is with him (with an ulterior motive to loosen the giant stick up mine's ass to get him to live a little). cue mine choking on his heart
I like the idea of daigo being oblivious to mine's obsessive behavior to an extent. he becomes so used to mine's quirks that he writes it off as oh he's just like that lol. but he's not wholly dumb to it. he'll be lowkey flirty and that's when mine's questions daigo's actions like "why is daigo smiling at me? is he sick? I should call an ambulance..."
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genuinely has zero idea what type of things mine likes. tho daigo grew up in a bougie type of life and mine currently lives it, he can assume things like fine arts and fancy shit tho personally he removed himself from that sort of thing as he got older (to avoid being anything even close to his dad lol). comparatively, daigo lives more modestly so gift giving is up to guessing but mine accepts literally anything from him and frankly refuses to give him hints as not to place expectations accidentally
likes to spar with mine and was surprised to see that daigo was decently capable of protecting himself and finds his informal style of fighting very charming. he's seen daigo fight before, but it's a bit of a different intensity when it's just to two of them trying their hardest to impress
has a network of friends/allies like kiryu, kashiwagi, etc that mine keeps a closer than needed eye on. daigo does get frustrated that he has to explain he trusts these people wholly and it's often a point of contention between them
very much likes slow days when they can just chill with each other, however that may be. cuddling is prime even if mine gets mad hot and sweaty so daigo keeps a full body towel handy. it's not unusual for daigo to go out of his way to prod mine for reactions as it's the highlight of his day
Mine
definitely has a shrine dedicated to daigo. for funnies: has weird shit like used napkins, articles of hair, etc just funky stuff someone wildin' would keep. realistically I think he'd be a lil more modest - having photos and baubles, typical normie shrine shit
absolutely has a folder on his phone/computer of "selfies" with him and daigo. most of them are just regular photos you'd find in like newspapers, half of them are blurry as hell, and there's a few he's taken himself but poorly done because he did it under a table or something. and of course there's many photos of just daigo, doing all assortment of things from working hard to hardly working
he's caught by daigo occasionally but mine attributes his behavior to "trying to find better phone signal" as he aims it coincidentally at daigo's spikey heeled boots. even when they're together together, he still does this on the sly
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insists on paying for everything whenever they're out but with enough convincing, he'll back down and internally melts when daigo tells him he's just happy to have his company. has a habit tho of "making up" for what he didn't pay for such as ordering lunches n things before daigo can refuse
obvs very violently protective of daigo tho avoids being so in front of him as much as possible. it's very common for someone who's spoken ill of daigo to get their ass beat or thrown into the Tokyo Bay some days later. has a network of people dedicated solely to routing out daigo haters
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is often confided to by daigo about the stresses of running the clan and it takes a lot out of mine for him to not be cold and calculating with an answer. has had to learn sometimes people just want someone to listen
at first, mine thought such confiding was some limp dick shit but over time realized that daigo never wanted anything out of such confessions which is unexpected. to have someone be so trusting and vulnerable with him is incredibly valuable
would have "sounds of daigo talking about stuff" recorded and sleeps to it every night. be assured clips of daigo sneezing are in there too
if he was in dead souls, he would be going turbo murder throughout the city just to dent the population of zombies that could even potentially get a whiff of daigo's darkness allure™ cologne. if infected, I imagine he'd have the will to remain loyal cuz the power of simp compels him
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insightfulllama · 11 months
Text
ANYWAY HERE’S A MASSIVE LIST OF OBSERVATIONS AND THOUGHTS FROM REWATCHING THE CABIN VOD AHAHAHAHA
(Spoilers)
The first thing Ranboo clearly says is, “It wasn’t supposed to…be like this…” They are very disoriented and confused, verging on distress.
When the mask turns on, they panic and yell “no” several times, before standing and going, “Where am I?” and “This place sure looks weird!” in the NPC voice. I believe he knew something was wrong and was able to scream, but not anything more before they took full control. 
The NPC behavior isn't as obvious as it is in "Warehouse", but I definitely see it now that I'm looking for it. Pretty unsettling. 
Ranboo checks locations they had already looked at before the mask turned on. (The door, the bookshelf, the ashes, etc)
Ranboo can see us, but with the masks influence we appear as a “weird painting”. 
When he is flipping through the magazines and waiting for chat to decide where they go, he says, “These are just old pajamas.” I think that’s what they say, I have no idea what it means. 
When Ranboo first goes to look at the window, he bends out of frame and messes with something (I think the VHS’s) and says, “Those don’t seem too important.” Pretty interesting considering he later uses a VHS to communicate with the one trying to get him out. (Showfalls influence?)
He’s complained about his head hurting twice now, I think this may become a pattern
They find a set of teeth in the drawer
The red key is IN the red bat- mirroring how the key is in Slimecicle later? Did he have to dig into a dead animal to get it here as well and we just didn’t see it because of the mask? 
Ranboo’s spacial awareness seems impaired. He doesn’t know where Slime went because he can’t directly see him. This happens again later with Sneeg, Ranboo looking the entirely wrong way when Sneeg calls out. Both Slime and Sneeg call attention to this- “It’s a house, there’s door frames! How did you get inside if you do not know what a door is?” and “How do you not hear me?...How did you look over there, man?”
JUST realized the key colors match the “characters” we’ve been introduced to. (The Savior, The Taken, The Villain)  I don’t know if there’s further symbolism connected to where the keys are found and stuff but it’s pretty neat. 
When Slime does the pinkie swear promising that Ranboo can leave after he does the cooking challenge, they have their fingers crossed behind their back. 
Slimy Guts is one of the available ingredients, bit sus considering our new knowledge. Also chinese leftovers got 0% of the votes LOL
The random cutaways are kinda strange. Don’t know what to make of them. 
Ranboo uses a pretty big knife to open a little package of slime, is instructed to “beat up” the food and call it names, and later he offers to cut Slime off the floor when he gets stuck. I think there’s a good chance ranboo stabbed someone and made a meal with their guts. Or something in that vein. (Several times Ranboo points out that these aren’t REAL ingredients and he doesn’t know how someone could eat it. What’s happening is probably so horrifying that he can’t imagine it as something normal like chicken, so his brain is substituting with stuff that’s weird but TECHNICALLY not morally reprehensible.)
Fridge says “BEHIND YOU” on it
Gummy worm was in the freezer, body parts can be kept in freezers, idk
Someone really likes mayo, cause they stopped it when it was on the turntable and gave the camera a thumbs up
Slime tries the meal but he’s really reluctant and needs specific circumstances to do it. If the theory of the meal being human guts it true, the hesitation probably didn’t have anything to do with airplane noises…
What is in the backgrounds of these cutaways? It’s so blurry idk, I can’t tell. It’s sort of purply. 
The dish in the end turns to slime with all the possible ingredients mixed in, even the ones we didn’t pick. In universe it reinforces that our choices don’t really matter, from a meta perspective it’s probably so they only had to make one slime prop. 
The timing of the marshmallow string stretching as slime tries to feed ranboo is HYSTERICAL, golden comedic timing
The mask starts blinking when ranboo gets the tape message. 
The person on tape instructs Ranboo “not to resist”. I believe this is said in the second message as well. Perhaps they don’t want Ranboo drawing attention to themself
Like in the room they woke up in, Ranboo checks areas multiple times, seemingly with no memory of the first time he checks. He does the exact same “flashlight in the eyes” gag each time he picks it up. It really enforces that in this moment he is a puppet, not making his own choices. 
“What’s over here?” NPC!Ranboo back in full swing with this dialogue. 
Ranboo did the cooking game, Sneeg didn’t. Sneeg refused to kill? Maybe cause he didn’t have a mask? Hmmm idk
The baby skull on a background shelf has a MASSIVE forehead
Light starts flickering when slime appears
What does the fight between evil sneeg and ranboo mean? Maybe they were both trapped and had a fight?? What does it mean without the obscuring mask? 
Ranboo is able to get sneeg out of slimes influence, and sneeg says a few times afterward that he’s immune now. Ranboo can help people get out of Showfalls influence? (The gooey hat does bring Sneeg out of the influence later, extension of that Ranboo effect?)
When Sneeg looks to see if Slime is in the box, there is a “shhhh” sound effect
Sneeg says Frank is his eyes and ears- was Frank a whistleblower, feeding information about Showfall to the outside? Unsure
Goo chest- possibly full of human bits? Corpse in a trunk is a pretty common trope
Jello on the shelves of Slime’s room
Same picture that was on the fridge is in a frame on the table
Ranboo looks at the mirror the same way twice, reinforcing the NPC vibes
Another false choice- the story only progresses if you go to sleep. Talking to Sneeg only gets some more NPC dialogue. Most of sneeg’s other dialogue sounds genuine, so this is strange.
Sneeg seems unable to move or act while ranboo is asleep
Could the eight hours that passed be literal? If things are obstructed by the mask it very well could be
“You would have known had you been awake!” Before the reveal of the mask making things look different I thought the streams were going to be revealed to be a dream. Clearly it’s not entirely a dream, but this dialogue is still fun. 
SHARK PICKLE LOBSTER TIME!! What would this be in real life? An actual human experiment? Security dogs? Full on hallucination?
This is a pretty funny way to promote the merch honestly lol (referring to ranboo using his merch to trick the thing into cage)
Ranboo seems baffled by his idle fighting animation for a second. He says, “Why am I just standing here? What’s going…” and when the camera pulls back the mask is flickering. 
When Slime sends his ghouls to grab Ranboo I believe he tries to move out of the way. They kind of jerk a bit, like they're trying to move their feet, before saying, “Why can’t I just- get out of here? I just need to get out of here-” The mask is once again flickering during this
After the fight the mask starts flickering a LOT, plus the other lights in the cabin. Tv comes back on. 
The TV man is named Hetch? He says, “My name is-” I think he says Hetch? Unsure
Mans gets drugged up at the end, rip
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sugar-coat-it · 9 days
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hi belle! what do you think body piercer is like as a bf 👉👈
also would you do an alphabet or something for him? lowkey dying for more content for him
Hiii!! <3 
Omgggg wait wait let me tell you some details
He’s very much into punk rock (Fugazi, Rage Against The Machine, etc.) and lives in his band tees. Much like the back room of the parlor, a lot of his stuff is covered in stickers for his fav bands. So I think he’d really like to introduce his girl to his music if she’s willing to try it out, it would mean a lot to him!
Whenever he picks her up, he’s always blasting music LOUD so she knows when he arrives 
Big fan of CDs. You can bet your ass that he’s burning CDs for her for all sorts of things. Songs that remind him of her, songs he wants to fuck her to. Some of them are stupid too, like “Good Shit” scrawled in black Sharpie on a disc. Sometimes he’ll scribble little drawings on there too. His handwriting is shit and she loves it.
Also music related, he's an amazing concert bf, always making sure she can see and no one is getting too close to her. He'd be SO PROUD if she went to a punk rock show with him
Now… if she ever did say she was interested in getting another piercing of any kind, he is begging her to let him do it for her (for free, with princess treatment). He’s very much like “fuck yeah, do it” whenever she brings up a tatt or piercing of any kind
Quietly cuddling, he’s tracing her features with his finger, he comes to the bridge of her nose and he’s suddenly like “You have a good nose for a septum piercing” and she’s like “???”
He remembers everything about her, and he makes a point to, even if he has to write sticky note reminders to himself sometimes (ADHD brain as hell)
This man SMOKES. My god his marijuana tolerance level is ungodly. If his girlie is into it too, it would be the joy of his life to roll spliffs for her.
Big fan of getting baked with her, putting on music, and then going off about the album’s impact on the music world because he knows she likes listening to him talk, and none of his boys let him ramble on nearly as much
The late-night diner visits after hotboxing his car go CRAZY (side note, don’t ask me why, but I feel like he has a rubber duck on his dashboard)
One time after a smoke session they built a fort in his room and made out for close to an hour, all giggly and hazy
I think he’d like to let his girl paint his nails. He prefers black, but he wouldn’t mind painting his nails the same shade as girlie’s so they can match
He also let her braid his mohawk once… lol
Tea had sent me an idea about this, but he’d absolutely buy her engraved jewelry. Like… barbells with hearts that have little M’s engraved on them??? Holy shit 
Also, from a discussion with B, HE GOES SO FERAL WHEN SHE GOES BRALESS AND HE CAN SEE HER PIERCINGS THROUGH HER TOP
He keeps a Polaroid picture of her both in his wallet and at the desk in the shop 
If anyone asks about it he’s like “THAT’S THE LIGHT OF MY FUCKING LIFE”
Veeery possessive. Not to a toxic point, but she is his, and he makes sure that everyone is aware in his own little ways 
He likes to be touching her almost all the time. Whether it’s an arm lazily slung around her shoulders or lacing their pinkie fingers together
Really likes love bites. One time he left hickeys in the shape of a heart on her collarbone 
Y’all remember that hip pouch thing he wore during the 2020 era? That but it’s filled with his girl’s things like her lipstick or her wallet so she doesn’t have to carry them
Teenage boy humor. Hella “that’s what she said” jokes
He forgets stuff at her place constantly. She’s starting to wonder if it’s on purpose at this point. Maybe it’s his own way of feeling like a more permanent part of her life
Finding his jewelry on her dresser, his lighter on her coffee table, a hoodie hung by the door
Sometimes he’ll leave his keys and come running back into her place just to end up messily kissing her against the wall
Overall, I think he probably looks a little intimidating to people because he has a mohawk and wears chains and platform boots but he’s such a sweetheart oh my god anon. He just loves her so so so much, and he’s so gentle with her. I love him. So much. That’s my baby.
And as for an alphabet, maybe! I’d be happy to if that’s something you guys would want to see
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copperbadge · 5 months
Note
Hi Sam! Recently diagnosed midlife ADHDer here. First, thanks for talking about your ADHD & sharing what you’re figuring out. It’s super helpful to someone on a similar trajectory.
I just saw a reference to your photo books for the first time & it seems like a great way to help with memory issues that come with ADHD (like I know I did [x thing] but when?). Could you talk a little about the process of collecting photos & such all year & then how you create one?
Thank you!
Ey, happy to have helped! Congrats and sympathies on your diagnosis. And honestly it's good for me too, talking all this out, it helps me get my thoughts in order. I often namedrop you guys to Therapist, you are "my readers" :D
The process of putting the photobooks together is...well, it's a lot, so this is going to be a super high-level overview, but basically yeah I wanted to have records of where I'd been and what I'd been doing that were more concrete than just digital photos on a hard drive or a cloud. But I didn't really want to just print the digital photos and put them in a box, either, so I started making photobooks. Usually I go through Walgreens or Shutterfly for printing, whichever has the good coupons when I'm working on it.
So, here's the weird, kind of obsessive part: a huge help in making a yearly photobook, for me, is the fact that I take my photos off my phone at the end of every month. I have some that live on the phone -- my growing collection of photos of my niece, a selection of photos from my Europe trip, some memes -- but those live in their own folders. The main camera roll gets downloaded every month, and I put them all in a file labeled with the month and year (2023-01, 2023-02, etc). It's a recurring task in my to-do list, that I offload the photos on the last Saturday of each month. You don't necessarily have to do it this way, though -- it's just what works best for me, and I encourage people to find a way to do things that will actually be functional for them.
Across the course of the year, although really moreso in October and November, I go through the photos and remove any I absolutely know I don't want to keep. Once I've done that, I save a copy of the whole year's worth of photos to my digital archive, and I take another copy and label it "FOR PHOTOBOOK" which allows me to do more culling of them than I otherwise would, because I know anything I delete is still in my archive. And this all has the advantage of me knowing that the photos in my archive are at least SOMEWHAT organized.
So I go through all the year's photos in the For Photobook file, month by month, sort them into folders by event (so there's, like, 01-Polar Vortex, or 04-Europe, or 09-Birthday) and clear out all but the photos I know I want most. My photobooks are generally longer than the default length they give you at most sites, so I usually do have to add a few pages (they're like $1/page or something) but not too many. Often these days I have some stuff that's events, like the Europe trip, and then some stuff that's just like....a folder of funny shit I saw in Chicago, or a folder of all the food I photographed that I want to save. The cats generally get their own four-page spread at the back. :D
In 2020, I will say, there were only two themes: CATS and COVID. I alternated pages.
Anyway, once I've got the photos sorted, and deleted any I don't want to include, I get on Shutterfly or Walgreens Photo and start up a new photobook project. I upload the first folder of photos, place them on the page with suitable captions, then upload the second folder of photos, etc etc, until all the photos are uploaded and placed in the book. I don't caption extensively -- often it'll just be a page that'll say like "TEXAS IN JULY!" and all the photos from that trip. But it definitely does help me keep track of what I was up to. And it's kind of soothing to review the year and see all the stuff I accomplished.
So that's the bare bones -- by all means feel free to ask questions, although if you guys wouldn't mind asking in comments or reblogs if possible, that should keep the discussion contained as necessary. :)
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whatthebodygraspsnot · 4 months
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totally random and don't know if you've been asked this before, i've read your fics and drabbles, i absolutely love your voice in them, considering how you write Ian and Mickey so well, i'd give a penny for your thoughts about Mickey's lil bridezilla notebook. do you think it's full of collage pages? mostly text? magazine scraps? does he color code shit? ugh i love him sm 😩
oh my god i forgot the most important thing!!!!!!! did he ever let Ian have a complete sneak peek through it? cause i think he probably skimmed through it with Ian while the planning was on board, but Mickey probably stored it somewhere safe as a keepsake after the wedding....what if one day Ian just happens to find it and looks through it fondly and Mickey catches him on the act, oops, they have a talk about it, idk, Mickey having a lil notebook just does something to my fragile heart 🤧🤧
hello 😌 thank you for asking - i do actually have some thoughts on this, in the way that i think mickey's wedding notebook goes through several stages.
i think at its creation, it's more of a dump-book. mickey's at his stream-of-consciousness, hunting-and-gathering phase. there's no organization - no rhyme or reason - mickey is stressed and overwhelmed and he's just gluing shit right into that motherfucker, filling the pages as quickly as he can turn them. he doesn't really have a Vision yet - he just knows he's gotta prepare for it, especially since ian doesn't seem too interested in making decisions.
come to jesus moment. mickey slaps down a stack of pictures he's cut out and goes to start adding them, only to realize he has no blank pages left. he's filled the whole thing. that can't be right, can it? it's a big notebook, and the stuff he just cut out for it is real good shit so he's gotta make room. gotta start from page one. gotta thumb through it and pull a 'wtf' face because he doesn't even like some of this shit? why'd he put it in here? tulips??? who did that! okay, time to pump the fucking brakes.
paring down. re-evaluation. ian walks into the living room one night and mickey's cross-legged in the middle of a sea of ripped papers. like some sort of hamster. ian thinks perhaps divorce is on the table, only to come closer and realize mickey's cutting shit out and pasting it into a new notebook, the glue stick caught between his teeth like a cigar (Alternate Title: Ian's Come To Jesus Moment.)
notebook 2.0 is born. there's significantly less...everything. the Vision is starting to come together. debbie gives him these little color tab bitches that he can stick between the pages so he knows where to put things. Music. Food. Flowers. etc. mickey sits down with ian again and flips through it, getting his thoughts on different things. out comes the big red marker - circling - crossing out - starring. he can see ian trying to sneak closer looks across the table, but mickey's grown very attached. it's his hopes and dreams in here, motherfucker! ian can look at it later. after he finds the chiavaris.
That Bitch. this baby is in her final form. mickey knows what he wants and knows he's got the power to haggle, secure, or steal it all when he's got his notebook tucked under his arm. she's also good and solid when he smacks lip over the head with her after he makes a passing comment about being a groomzilla. she is everything.
when he does finally see his notebook again after many years, it's because ian is thumbing through it, this teary, fond look in his eyes as he sits in a sea of boxes. mickey doesn't know if he should be embarrassed or proud or what. a lot of their wedding day ended up shifting on its axis for a ton of fucked up reasons, so as gorgeous as she is, a lot of her didn't actually get to see the light of day.
but ian is innnn lovvvve (aaaaat laaaaast my looove has come alonnnggg). so much so that for their ten year anniversary, mickey walks into their little get-together and immediately recognizes a ton of the details. like they've jumped out of the pages of his notebook and into reality ten years later. ian is a sneaky fucker! and mickey has excellent taste.
and he's just really glad that he cut out that disgusting tulip arrangement in his first notebook purge.
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oneatlatime · 3 months
Note
Any predictions for season 3, or are you planning to dive straight in?
You're not the first person who's mentioned s3 predictions, so I'll give it a shot, but I'm really not sure if I have anything to use to make predictions. S2 ended in a very final, end of arc kind of way. Lots of things have been tied up. I don't even know where they're all flying off to. Back to the Southern Water Tribe, since the Earth Kingdom's a bit of a bust? The Fire Nation's out of the question, the Northern Water Tribe probably has mixed feelings about seeing them again, maybe the Eastern Air Temple? Although even that might not be safe, since Aang's travel plans to said temple to meet the Guru were known by various Earth Kingdom generals. And that stupid King.
I think the Fire Nation contingent are going back to the Fire Nation, and I am looking forward to a Zuko with eyes at least somewhat open interacting with FN citizens/nobles/military etc. who are still completely drinking the kool aid. I think it's going to suck for Zuko. Should make for good TV though. Lots of conversations where both people are saying entirely different things while thinking they're talking about the same thing.
I said it before, but I'm worried for Iroh. He's for sure arrested, but is he going to be executed? Obviously I don't want that, but unless Iroh still has enormous popular support, and the Firelord's grasp on power is incredibly shaky, I don't see how permanently eliminating a traitor (from a FN perspective) can be avoided. Then again. Kids' show.
As for the Gaang? In broad strokes, Aang still needs to learn firebending to fully Avatar himself, then he needs to defeat the Fire Lord (who is quite the homebody apparently - seriously, where is this guy?). So next season Aang will shake off his lightning hangover, find a firebending teacher, defeat the firelord. He'll probably have to commute to the Fire Nation to find the Fire Lord first. No idea what he'll do in between those things. Perhaps inadvisable shenanigans? That would be in character. His biggest story arc all series has been learning to accept his status as Avatar, but between his talks with the Guru and opening his last Chakra in the finale, I think he's done it. So all that's left is the main plot and goofiness.
Katara has the same problem she had going into S2 - she's mastered waterbending, so she needs a new conflict/arc. S2 answered this demand by... having her hang around? What did Katara do this season? Bend a bunch, set up camps, tear down camps, wreck Jet, support Aang, be nice to Toph that one time, yell at people. I hope she gets something meatier in S3. I still think she should meet some good FN citizens that challenge her morals.
Sokka was also kind of just there this season, although if I'm being mean I'll say that he was also kind of just there for S1 too, which is why it doesn't feel as odd as Katara's lack of purpose. I loved his stuff with Suki. Suki is officially the glow up of the season. I loved their interactions together, and I love the growth she poked him into doing. I'd like to see more of that. So less a prediction and more of a hope: S3 Sokka develops the ability to rely on/trust others (or maybe realises others can be relied upon/trusted is more accurate), hopefully with Suki somehow involved. And I loved his dad too. I want to see more of that guy, but since a cardinal rule of kids' stories is getting rid of the authority figures asap, it won't happen.
Toph. Honestly I'm stumped. She already broke the universe. Where can she go from there? Unless she's going to devolve into an antagonist, which I absolutely don't want, I don't see how she can top her S2 plot. And Aang's got earthbending down, so I guess she'll be like Katara was this season: tagging along. Not that I'm complaining; I love me some Toph in any form. We have seen that she wants to make peace with her parents, sort of, probably? Or at least give them another shot? But I kind of don't want her within 100 miles of her parents. So I don't know.
Appa & Momo will hopefully be tagalongs in S3 too. I learned my lesson this season about wanting the animals to have character arcs.
I guess the antagonist in S3 will be the Fire Lord, finally. Who else is left? Zhao tried, he died. Azula tried, she won. Unless S3 has an Azula rematch. But would she want that? She's already proven that she won. She can go home and enjoy the spoils of her victory (which may or may not include Zuko - I'm kind of unclear on exactly how much agency Zuko is going to have in the FN, especially since I'm not actually sure that he has permission to be there as a free man - didn't the arrest warrant Azula was executing in episode 1 list both Zuko and Iroh?)
There's nothing left for the Gaang in Ba Sing Se, so I doubt they'll go back there. Frankly it's the FN characters who have roots there. I wonder what will happen to Iroh's tea shop? I wonder if his investors will find out who he is? I wonder if money talks louder than national loyalty? (It's the Earth Kingdom - the answer is yes) Wouldn't it be funny if Iroh busted out of imprisonment and went right back to serving tea? And everyone sent to find him would be thinking "this is the famed tactician the Dragon of the West - he's probably travelling the FN plotting a coup as we speak. That devilish mind of his must have safe houses set up all over the nation." When actually he's right back where he got caught, doing exactly what he was doing when he got caught, to great and not-very-quiet acclaim?
I think S3 might have an overall darker tone too, within the bounds of a kids' show. I don't know what place Ba Sing Se occupied in the mind of the average person in the Avatar universe (although refugees seemed to revere it), but the city's fall to the FN represents a very big FN victory. The Gaang will probably be the most underdoglike in S3. S1 was mostly stalemate, then a big FN defeat. S2 was opened with the FN taking Omashu and closed with them taking Ba Sing Se. The FN have never been in a better position, and I bet the NWT is safe from further invasion only until the FN have built their fleet back up. So even the few free areas could have an expiry date on their freedom.
This is rapidly devolving into rambles, so I'll conclude by saying I have no clue what's going to happen next season, and that's exciting.
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crescencestudio · 7 months
Text
Devlog #35 | 09.26.23
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Hi everyone!
Hope the beginning of Fall has been kind to you all <3 To be Frank, it has not been Kind to me LMFAO. But I'll get into that, so let's dive in yippee!
Before I do, someone liked this post recently, which was such a throwback. It was before the full demo was out and everything!! I was so young and full of life. I'm going to sprinkle some comparison shots of the new assets with the old ones to break up the text and also walk down memory lane with me! (Full GUI not shown as I'm still waiting on the assets)
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Chapter Cards (Left: After | Right: Before)
The "Progress"
I'm going to structure this devlog a little differently from the usual template. The main reason being, for those of you who didn't see, I have not been feeling Myself recently.
This month I found myself all out of sorts. While I felt like I was making progress and doing so much everyday read: fighting for my life, when I looked back on things at the end of this month, I didn't feel like I really did much.
On a higher level, I finished fulfilling Kickstarter physical rewards, opened a Kofi shop of the remaining merch, edited Druk's route and continued writing Etza's route, updated assets and code for the updated demo, and then general commission stuff (BGs from Vui, soundtracks from Peter, etc.).
But overall, Alaris felt largely like it was kinda sitting at around the same spot as it did when I entered this month. Which made me a little sad! I had wanted to make So Much Progress on Alaris because next month I won't be able to work on it really. Then, I realized I haven't taken a break from game development since I started it two years ago HA!!!
The Real Progress
Development for me has been back-to-back. Chapter releases every 1-2 months during my first half year of development, Full Demo release shortly after, Kickstarter shortly after, Full Game Development shortly after. When I was feeling burnt out from Alaris, I made intertwine. Then I was Heavily Involved in the development of two games shortly after.
All of this on top of my IRL responsibilities, which include a job, PhD school, and well, functioning as a normal human occasionally.
And then here we are at the end of September 2023, and I'm wondering why even though I creatively want to work on Alaris, I find my brain literally just getting too tired to think.
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Etza CG (Left: After | Right: Before)
I think ever since the Kickstarter, I've put a lot of pressure on myself to consistently put out LOTS of updates for each monthly devlog. I don't want people to think I'm not working on things or I'm not committed to delivering after giving me their hard earned money. But now, with two years under my belt, I'm realizing that is... HMM maybe too high of a standard to put on myself for my first game ever. There are many much more seasoned developers than me who don't put that pressure on themselves (which is Good and Healthy).
So this month, I debated scrounging around and gathering all my crumbs to give you all a devlog that you'll be satisfied with. But I decided ultimately that wouldn't be good for me and would honestly not be the most transparent way to present the current process of things.
And so. Here I am. Head in my Hands. Letting you all know that while I'm not "burnt out," I am.... only human LOL (one human at that). And so some months, like this one, will just not have much progress to report. Not because I'm not working on it or any other deeper reason. But because it's physically impossible and unreasonable for me to be continuously pushing out a steady stream of content.
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In-Game Sprites & BGs (Left: After | Right: Before)
Next month, I'lll be taking a vacation. It's actually my first Big, Official one in a Long Time! I'm very excited for it. And while I did initially think about working on Alaris while I was traveling on trains or things like that, I decided to respect my own need to be a Human and just take a break for once in my life. I don't even want to say I Might work on things, because that sentiment alone will pressure me to make some progress. So yes. Next month, there will be no devlog or updates. But please rest assured, I am "working on Alaris" by letting myself just Exist and Rest Up!
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Not an Alaris screenshot but it is market research that deserves to be included because I played House in Fata Morgana recently and it was Phenomenal!
Thank you all for understanding and your continued support. I'm extremely appreciative to have such a kind and patient community. Hope you all have a wonderful October filled with Fall Treats, and I'll see you in November! <3
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