#songs that carried me through 2021 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lilacmingi · 5 months

Text

SECRET SANTA

All my works are 14+ ONLY. If you’re under 14 DO NOT interact with me or any of my works

Pairing: Fashion designer!Hongjoong x fashion designer!fem reader

Word count: 3,170

Note: Since December is starting soon I thought it would be the perfect time to start posting Christmas imagines from 2021. Since this imagine originated on Wattpad, there will not be any continuations

You sat at your station, your half-finished sketch left abandoned and forgotten, your eyes following Hongjoong as he made his way through the massive room, collecting different fabrics for his next masterpiece. The outfit he wore was flawless, as usual—he was flawless. His choppy mullet was tousled perfectly, he wore a black bleach-stained shirt; the collar had been cut, making it hang lower, showing off his beautifully sculpted collarbones and that adorable mole at the base of his neck. On top of the shirt was a leather jacket paired with ripped black jeans and chunky boots.

A pair of hands slammed onto your desk as a body blocked your view. Glancing up, you saw your coworker, Minghao, with a Santa hat in hand.

"Move." You waved your hand in a shooing gesture. "You're blocking the view."

"You can stop staring at Hongjoong long enough to put your name in the hat."

"What?"

"Put your name in the hat. It's for secret Santa."

"I'm not into the whole secret Santa thing."

"Come on. You get three gifts, one on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, plus we're having a big party to end the week."

You gave an indifferent hum in response.

"Hongjoong signed up for it." Minghao mentioned in a sing-song voice.

"If I put my name in the stupid hat, will you let me continue staring at him?"

"Of course."

You quickly scribble your name down on a small piece of paper, dropping it into the hat.

"Thank you." Minghao grinned, sauntering away.

Once he left, Hongjoong had already returned to his station, which wasn't a problem because you had a perfect view of him.

You'd always admired Hongjoong for his killer style and out-of-the-box ideas. You admit, you've only spoken to him a handful of times, so you don't know him that well, but every conversation you've shared with him has been a good one.

Later that day, the names in the hat were shuffled around and every employee drew a slip of paper from the hat. You unfolded your paper seeing the name Taehyung scrawled on it. You were familiar with Taehyung and knew he would be pretty easy to buy for. In fact, you already had a few things in mind.

"Alright." Your boss clasped his hands together. "Now that everyone has drawn a name, I'll go over the rules. Gifts will be given Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. We have a ₩60,000 (about $50) limit on each gift. You don't have to spend that amount, but try not to go over if you can. The presents will be collected under the Christmas tree over here and distributed to everyone at the end of the work day. Sound good?"

Everyone nodded in understanding.

"Okay, good. Secret Santa starts in two weeks, so you've got time to shop. Have fun."

A couple weeks passed and you had purchased three gifts for Taehyung and had them all wrapped neatly. You carried gift number one into work with you, placing it underneath the tree before heading over to your station. You stopped when you saw a gift sitting on your desk. You picked up the small box, examining it.

You wondered why the gift was on your desk and not underneath the tree and why your secret Santa would put it there. Glancing around, you decided to go ahead and open it.

You pulled the paper back, revealing a small black box with a sticky note on the top that read: To Y/n. Upon removing the lid, you saw a beautiful pair of earrings and a matching necklace. Your eyes widened as you ran your fingers over the flashy jewelry. There was no way what you held in your hand was worth just ₩60,000. You glanced around the room again to see if anyone was watching, but everyone seemed to be busy doing their own thing.

You couldn't think of anyone that would buy you such an extravagant gift, let alone leave it on your desk.

With no answers to your many questions, you decided to just get to work. You had a few sketches you worked on in the past weeks and had started making a blouse. You headed over to the fabric wall and began picking out the ones you needed. Once you had all the materials at your station, you got to work.

The day seemed to pass by fairly quickly and before you knew it, your boss was handing out secret Santa presents. Since you already opened yours, you watched for Taehyung to get his. Once the present was placed on his desk, he started unwrapping it. His mouth dropped open when he pulled out canvases and a paint set equipped with brushes, an easel, and even a palette for the paint.

You tried to hold back your smile as you watched him pull out the small note you typed up.

You then turned your attention to Hongjoong who had just finished unwrapping his gift. It was some sort of sweater, which didn't seem to be his style. Your face twisted in slight distaste as you saw it. If it were you, you would have gotten him a more edgier-looking sweater, or even a beret. You've seen him wear them before and would assume he'd enjoy receiving one as a gift.

Everyone got ready to leave for the day, you decided to walk up and talk to Hongjoong.

"Hey." You greeted.

"Hi, Y/n."

Your heart melted when he said your name. It sounded so beautiful and melodic when it came from him.

"Nice sweater." You told him.

"Thanks. It's..." He trailed off, giving you a wary glance.

"Don't worry. I'm not your secret Santa." You assured him.

"Ah." He seemed relieved. "Well, it's honestly not my style, but I'm sure I'll find a way to dress it up." He smiled.

"I'm sure you will. You're extremely talented."

He let out a tiny chuckle, glancing at the floor for a moment. "Thank you. So, what did your secret Santa get you?"

"Jewelry. Expensive-looking jewelry too. They also left it on my desk."

"Really?" He raised a brow. "What does the jewelry look like?"

"Here." You dug around in your bag, pulling out the tiny box and opening it.

"Wow." He marveled. "That's beautiful."

"It is. It's my style as well. Makes me curious about what else my secret Santa has in store."

"Well, let's hope they get you stuff you like."

"I'll be thankful no matter what I get." You smiled. "Anyway, I'm gonna head home. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah." Hongjoong smiled. "I'll see you tomorrow."

When secret Santa day two rolled around, you placed your present for Taehyung underneath the tree and headed to your work station as per usual.

Sitting on your desk was a sizable box wrapped in metallic deep blue wrapping, a white bow on top. You placed your hand over your mouth, glancing around the workplace. You lifted the small tag on the box, reading the writing on it.

I don't like following rules.

- Your Secret Santa

You debated about wether you wanted to open it right away or just wait. After debating for a moment, you decided to hold off and be patient. However, you found it hard to concentrate as you worked on the blouse. Your eyes kept drifting over to the shiny gift sitting on your desk.

Whoever has been leaving presents at your workspace seems to be a risk-taker, as they're coming in and leaving the gift, chancing getting caught by someone. You could only assume they were arriving before everyone else and making sure no one saw them.

"Ooh." You heard someone say.

You placed your needle onto your desk, turning to see no other than Minghao.

"What?" You asked.

"That shiny gift on your desk." He pointed with a grin.

"It's from my secret Santa."

"Why didn't they put it under the tree?"

"Beats me." You shrugged.

"You're not opening it now?"

"No. I opened the first one as soon as I came into work Monday, but I'm holding back for this one."

"You sure?" Minghao asked.

"Yes, I'm sure. I'm gonna be patient."

"Okay, then. Good luck with your blouse." He waved, returning to his own work station.

The end of the work day approached and it was time for secret Santa once again.

You watched as everyone's gifts were handed out, deciding to watch Taehyung open his again.

You knew how much Taehyung loved his dog, Yeontan, so today's gift was a matching top you made for him and his beloved pet. You used beautiful brown and beige printed fabric and made a button down shirt and a mini version for Yeontan. A bright and brilliant boxy smile spread across Taehyung's features as he saw his gift. You couldn't hold back your own bright smile as you saw his reaction. It made you feel like you'd done a pretty good job of choosing his gifts thus far.

After seeing Taehyung open his gift you went to open yours. Unlike Monday's gift, this one didn't have to be unwrapped. The box and lid itself were wrapped separately so all you had to do was remove the top. Upon removing the lid, you saw a pair of heels. They were black suede platforms with a block heel. There were two straps on them; one strap to go across the toes and one to buckle around the ankle. They were simple, but beautiful and seemed like they'd be easy to walk in, which was perfect for you.

You lifted one of the shoes from the box, examining it and checking the size.

"These are my size." You muttered to yourself.

Placing the shoe back into the box, you put the lid on it and began to gather your things.

You were going to say goodbye to Hongjoong, but he was already gone.

Secret Santa day three rolled around and you weren't sure what else to expect. Your secret Santa had gotten you a stunning set of jewelry and an adorable pair of heels. You weren't sure what would be next.

When you arrived at work, you weren't surprised to see yet another gift sitting on your desk. Today's gift was in a long, flat box and it was wrapped in beautiful glittery red paper with white snowflakes printed all over it. Since it was the last day of secret Santa you decided to wait again to open your gift.

Today proved to be more difficult than the others. You kept glancing over at the present waiting for the work day to end.

Hours passed and your patience paid off. Your boss emerged from his office with a warm smile on his face.

"Alright. As everyone knows today is the last day of secret Santa. I'll start handing gifts out shortly, but first I want to remind everyone of the Christmas party that we're having tonight. It starts at 7:00 and it'll take place at a wonderful venue down the street. They have a huge room that we've rented out for this party. I hope to see you all there."

Like all the other days, you watched Taehyung open his present before you opened yours. For his last gift, you got him a diamond painting kit of Van Gogh's Starry Night. It was a fun little thing he could do during his free time, plus you knew Taehyung loved Van Gogh. After watching his reaction, you turned your attention to your own secret Santa gift.

You pulled back the decorative wrapping revealing a clothing box. You discarded the wrapping paper and opened up the box. Inside was a stunning dress in your favorite color. On top of the formal clothing was a note that read:

Meet me outside under the gazebo at 8:00. Wear all your gifts, please.

- Your Secret Santa

You pressed your lips together, trying to suppress the smile that threatened to break out onto your features. You pulled the dress from the box, getting a better look at it. The garment was medium length, not too short but not long enough to drag the floor. It was a simple dress, but stunning nonetheless. You placed it back into its box and went to chat with Taehyung before he left. You wanted to tell him that you were his secret Santa.

"Taehyung." You called.

He looked up at you with a warm smile.

"Hi, Y/n."

"I just wanted to let you know that I was your secret Santa."

A look of surprise flashed across his face.

"Really? It was you?"

"Mhm." You nodded.

He pulled you into a tight hug. "Thank you. Everything was perfect, especially the matching shirts for me and Tannie."

"I'm really glad you liked it."

He pulled away and ruffled your hair slightly. "I'm gonna head home now. I'll see you at the party tonight."

"See ya." You waved, heading back to your station to pack up.

To your surprise, Hongjoong was standing by your work area waiting for you when you turned around.

"Hey, Y/n." He greeted you.

"Hi, Hongjoong."

"I was wondering if you wanted to walk out together."

"Oh, sure." You placed your bag onto your shoulder and walked out with him.

"Are you coming to the Christmas party tonight?" He asked.

"I am. Are you?"

"Yeah." He nodded. "I'm excited."

"Me too." You smiled, trying to hide your elation.

Hongjoong walked you to your car and bid you goodbye, saying that he would see you at the party.

You arrived at the venue just before 7:00. The building was decked out in bright Christmas lights, wreaths were hung on the windows giving the place a warm and festive feel. Upon entering the building you heard Christmas music being played, accompanied by the low murmur of partygoers chatting.

Your hair was styled perfectly and your makeup was done with a festive theme in mind. You also donned all of the gifts from your secret Santa. The dress, surprisingly, fit you perfectly, as did the shoes. Whoever got them for you knew exactly what they were doing.

You hadn't really considered who your secret Santa could be. You were just so giddy about your anonymous gift giver wanting to meet, you didn't really think about it.

You first stopped at the food and refreshments table to get yourself a glass of punch. You then made your way around the room greeting your coworkers and even danced with Taehyung for a bit. Before you knew it, it was 8:00. Your heart jumped when you glanced at the clock.

It was time to meet your secret Santa.

You made your way to one of the side doors and stepped outside. A concrete landing sat just outside the door, beyond that was a stone path that led to a gazebo. You could see someone standing there, but you were too far away to know who it was. Stepping across the stone path you moved closer to the gazebo, the quiet gasp leaving you when you saw who it was.

"Hongjoong?"

He turned around with a grin on his face.

You had to stop for a moment because he looks so handsome. His hair looked beautiful as always. His bangs were styled in a side part and pushed away from his face, showing off his perfect brows and sharp eyes. His outfit was pristine and high-end. He sported a very nice suit with a large, extravagant fur coat. It was typical Hongjoong attire.

"I'm glad I got your measurements right." He spoke, eyeing your dress.

"You made this?"

"I did."

"You're my secret Santa?"

"I am." He nodded with a shy smile.

You couldn't believe it. Out of all the people that could've been your secret Santa it was your crush.

"Everything you got me was so beautiful." You told him. "It was all perfect."

"I'm glad you liked it. I went a little over the price limit, but like I said, I don't like following rules." He smirked.

His hand extended to you, his rings glimmering under the fairly lights strung up. You took hold, allowing him to lead you all the way under the gazebo.

"This is... really romantic." You commented.

"Good."

His answer surprised you a bit.

He meant for it to be romantic?

"I'm sure you're wondering why I wanted you to wear the things I gifted you." He spoke up.

"Sort of."

"I began planning this the day our boss made the announcement for secret Santa. The jewelry, the shoes, the dress, and meeting up with you right here tonight."

"Why would you plan something so wonderful like this for me?"

"Because I like you, Y/n."

"I'm sorry? Did I hear you correctly?" You asked in disbelief.

"You did." He chuckled. "I've liked you for so long, but I wasn't sure you felt the same. That is until I caught you staring at me from across the room... more than once."

You face dropped, your cheeks becoming hot.

"You have?"

"Yes, and I find it adorable. I find you adorable." He emphasized.

"You do?"

He nodded.

All you could do was stare in disbelief, unable to comprehend what in the world was happening.

Hongjoong's sparkly eyes darted down to your lips before he started leaning in, causing your breathing to quicken. His lips came to a stop just centimeters from yours.

"Look up." He whispered, his minty breath fanning against your cheeks.

You did as he said and glanced above you to see a mistletoe hanging from the wooden beams of the gazebo.

"Oh." Was all you could say as you turned your gaze back to Hongjoong.

He wasted no time closing the gap between your mouths, pressing his lips against yours firmly. His hands found their way to your waist running up and down your sides before his arms slid their way around you, tugging you closer to him. Your hands trailed up to his hair, your fingers playing with the long strands of his mullet, carding your fingers through it.

A hum of satisfaction from Hongjoong vibrated against your lips as his head tilted to the side, deepening the kiss.

It was a little cold outside, but with the steamy kiss you were sharing with Hongjoong, you weren't able to feel the frigid chill in the air. In fact, your whole body was getting warmer by the second.

After parting ways Hongjoong let out a chuckle. "That was so worth it."

"What?" You giggled.

"Hanging up that mistletoe." He answered. "It took me forever to get it up there, but all that hard work paid off."

"Yes it did." You agreed.

He looked at you with a fond expression, his hand coming up to brush a strand of hair from your face.

"Merry Christmas, Y/n."

"Merry Christmas, Hongjoong."

"Should we go back inside and join the party? Sounds like they're playing some good music."

"Let's do it."

Seonghwa ❄︎ Yunho ❄︎ Yeosang ❄︎ San ❄︎ Mingi ❄︎ Wooyoung ❄︎ Jongho

Masterlist ᝰ — enjoyed this imagine? reblogs & comments are very much appreciated!

DO NOT steal, plagiarize, copy, repost, alter, or translate my works in any way

#ateez imagines #hongjoong #kim hongjoong #choi san #jeong yunho #yunho #jung wooyoung #wooyoung #kang yeosang #yeosang #mingi #song mingi #park seonghwa #seonghwa #choi jongho #jongho #ateez x reader #hongjoong x reader

196 notes · View notes

tinydeskwriter · 2 years

Text

BUZZFEED ARTICLE

Warnings: Fluffy💓… this is a famous y/n, actually this was the background draft for a request of a jealous!Jack, and I got carried away and wrote the whole wikipedia of the girl🤦🏻‍♀️ and it ended up becaming an article🤷🏻‍♀️ I liked, so I decided to share with you guys, I would have put pictures, but I didn’t want Y/n to have a face, body type or a race. Just reminding everyone that I'm open to requests.

Part ii- Cosmopolitan Couples Timeline

Buzzfeed Article

Our favorite famous uncomplicated couple (a big compliment in the age of cringe couples) just completed the one-year relationship milestone. There is a lot of moments to sift through to pick the best, despite being private neither are shy to share photos and videos of the other to give us all the content we crave. So, here are our picks:

The 10 Times rapper Jack Harlow and actress Y/n Y/s/n Made Us Believe in Love:

10. Matching Tattoos Are Cool, But This Couple Wears Matching Jewelry

Is unofficial and absolute an assumption. But fans couldn't help but notice the white gold sinet rings worn by the couple. Or the fact that Jack has been wearing an emerald tennis bracelet on his left wrist, emeralds being Y/n's birthday stone. Most obvious maybe is the 'J' chain spotted around Y/n's neck in early March.

9. Those Red Carpets Looks…

And let's not forget the matching outfits Harlow and Y/l/n have been serving us since early 2022, with one half of the couple in the film industry and the other half in the music industry, this couple had a full award season, and we're not complaining. The All-Black Givenchy outfit at the Grammys? Blue Dior at the Academy Awards?

8. Y/N ‘Cheerleader’ Outfit At NBA All Star Game Rooting For 'Her Man'

Y/n has accomplished a feat few women could... and it was taking the male attention away from Megan Fox. In a vintage white Versace look worn on the runway by Kate Moss in 1995, the sweetest detail of the look may be the silk ribbon the actress wore in her ponytail with ‘Harlow’ written on it. The rapper dedicated his 4 pointer to his girl, which, come on, it's sweet. Harlow may have lost the game, but you wouldn't tell from the smile he wore when he left the stadium with his girlfriend in his arms.

7. How They Met

Usually when it comes to famous couples we never know exactly how that first look happened… but not when it comes to internet’s boyfriend Jack-I-have-never-been-in-love-Harlow and America's sweetheart Y/n Y/l/n. This uncomplicated couple met for the first time at the 2021 Met Gala, right on the red carpet, the two were guests to the designer Tommy Hilfiger, and weren't shy about posing together for the cameras giving us all Cinderella and Prince Charming vibes. Rumors have it that the couple spent the evening by each other side, never parting for long, with comedian Pete Davidson, a mutual friend of the couple, joking once that Jack followed Y/n around the whole night like a puppy in love. It comes to no surprise that the two ended up at the same after party. In an interview with Net-a-Porter Y/l/n told how that night Jack gave her a ride back to the hotel after the after party, and on the way they stopped at this lovely hole in the wall pizza place for a few slices of pizza and soda, saying “We have been together from the day that we met, we followed each other around the country.” In a radio interview, Harlow, known for his privacy, commented: “Y/n is the dream girl, man, she was and still is, 'cause no one tops her, my celebrity crush, I wasn't going to sit around waiting, she I was a little reluctant, I was persistent, I basically threw it on my shoulders, caveman style.”

6. Their Song Is Fire on Fire by Sam Smith

“I was in Ireland re-shooting some scenes, it was the early days of our relationship, so Jack came with me—you couldn’t get one without getting the other those early days, we were very attached—, we stayed in this very charming little cottage by the sea, that's where we laid the foundation of our relationship, away from civilization, away from the public eye, all very domestic and ordinary, nothing too glamorous, one night we were making Mac’n’Cheese for dinner, and Fire on Fire played on Spotify, we started dancing around the kitchen and at the end Jack said: This is our song. And it's been our song since that day.” The actress told British Elle in April, in the same interview, the New England beauty revealed that she's hooked her boyfriend on her beauty routine... which involves long bubble baths that they take together.

5. Their GQ Couples Quiz Was #Goals

It is no wonder that it is one of the most viewed Couples Quiz on the channel. In the nearly twenty-minute video, Y/n confessed that their first kiss took a while to happen because she knew it would be the last first kiss of her life. We found out she was 'told' by the rapper that she was now his girlfriend "I felt used, she was getting all the benefits of a relationship and going around saying she wasn't my girlfriend, that hurt," Jack joked making his girlfriend blush. He calls her “doll-face, babygirl, sweetheart, my heart, and Sunshine”, “all the clichés” the actress rolls her eyes, but the smile on her face as she looks at her boyfriend doesn't deny that she likes the nicknames, “she calls me a barbarian” Jack ratted out Y/n “because he is, but he's my barbarian,” she defends herself “I call you angel a lot, love too.” Oh. And they were living together in Los Angeles “in Frank Sinatra former home”. But it's just for now, as they agree that neither of them are LA people. Yep. And apparently their house has 'No Clothes' rules, valid for residents only. To be a fly on the wall.

4. They already talked about babies…

And we are dying…Jack said in a radio interview that the topic of children came up at the very beginning of their relationship, and surprisingly he was the one who came up with the subject, “It was one of the first things I thought of when we first met, Y/n's smile It's beautiful, but when she's truly happy her smile looks like a kid's smile on a Christmas morning, and I remember PD said something, and she gave this smile, and the first thing that came to my mind was: Damn, I want my children to have that smile. Some say we're too young to be so serious about each other, especially so fast, but when you know you know.” Harlow continued “After that we went to Ireland, and the subject came up there, because Y/n's character has kids, and seeing the girl I’am completely crazy about with kids in her arms, and the little girl looked just like her, man, that does things to a man.”

3. The Way Jack’s Hands Never Leave Y/n…

Like, never. They might not be that cringe couple who lick each other's tongues on the red carpet, but Jack Harlow is alway touching his lady, always. Has anyone got over that brief moment on the red carpet at the Grammys where they parted ways for like five seconds and Y/n just stopped and looked over her shoulder, and Jack came to her side in five strides? And how their hand simply intertwined? Let's not forget Jack's 'Hey babygirl' like they've been apart for hours...

2. Their Eyes are Constantly in Each Other

The words eye-fucking don't properly describe the exchange of looks between the two young stars, eye-love-making seems a much more appropriate term.

1.How Jack Always Moves Y/N To The Right Side Of The Sidewalk

Whenever the couple is spotted out and about together, distinctively, Jack is always on the street side of the sidewalk, and on one occasion a fan managed to film the exact moment the 24-year-old rapper not-so-discreetly twirled his giggling movie-star girlfriend to the 'safe' side of the sidewalk, causing millions of hearts to burst in the process. I mean…This is serious just boyfriend goals.

Honorable Mentions:

# This couple takes each other's mom out to lunch... we just can't...

# All those double dates, I mean… Justin and Hailey… Kendall and Devin… Kim and Pete… Zack Bia and whoever that girl was… and there was that one time they took Drake as a third wheel on their Nobu’s date…

# They may be the most romantic sexy couple #couplegoals at the moment, but not everything is serious, they know how to have fun, and they know how to play pranks on each other…

URGENT UPDATE

Ladies and Gents… Jack Harlow and Y/n Y/l/n are no longer a dating couple… they are a ENGAGED couple. And the proposal simply surpassed all the moments listed above.

“It was very domestic. Very us. Very simple, or as simple as J can be. The entire first floor of our house looked like a garden of sunflowers—my favorite flower in the world— initially I thought it was just Jack trying to be romantic because he missed me, there were candles everywhere, and our music was playing on the sound-system, we danced, and he just said: Let's get married. You. Me. And a team of mini us for the rest of our lives. I laughed because I didn't think he was being serious and said he'd have to ask properly, that's when he knelt down and took the box with the ring out of his sweatpants pocket and gave the most romantic speech and here we are…#soontobemrs.” The actress shared with her 93M IG followers.

The rapper shared a photo of the ring in Y/n finger with the caption: “It’s official. We’re using the buddy system for the rest of our lives.”

#jack harlow #jack harlow imagines #jack harlow imagine #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow x y/n #jack harlow x you #jack harlow x oc #jackman thomas harlow

3K notes · View notes

bijouxcarys · 2 months

Text

Robert Plant is Not Ready to Retire: “I’ve Got Something to Say.”

Retirement isn’t on Robert Plant‘s radar. Along with revealing a North American tour with Alison Krauss during Summer 2024 and another series of UK headlining dates with his band Saving Grace, Plant said he still has more to do and hinted at the possibility of new solo music.  Since releasing “Raise the Roof,” his second collaborative album with Krauss, in 2021, along with his 11th solo album, “Carry Fire,” in 2017 Plant said he has been revisiting music he’s had archived away.   Along with his 2024 touring schedule and sifting through unreleased material, Plant, 75, said retirement isn’t an option for him.  “The camaraderie, the things that you share up there, and the frailties that you know you’re carrying with you quietly, the exposure of yourself to yourself, is something that I would hate to say goodbye to,” said Plant. “I can’t just sit back. Out there in the real world, people say to me, ‘What about the book?’ And I say, ‘Are you kidding? What? This is spectacular. Why think about it twice?’”

Plant added, “This is today. What happened in Schenectady in 1969 is another story. And for me, the continuum must keep going. Today, I was pulling all my lyric books out and going, ‘Gotta get the groove back. I’ve got something to say.’ So yeah, I’m going to keep going—as long as they’ve got effects machines that make me sound good [laughs]. Well, it worked for Elvis [Presley]. Listen to the compression on his voice on some of those big ballads in ’57.”

In October 2023, Plant performed three Led Zeppelin songs as a guest performer during a benefit concert at the Soho Farmhouse in Oxfordshire, England for The Cancer Platform, an initiative launched by the Cancer Awareness Trust.

Plant’s set included “Stairway to Heaven,” which he hadn’t performed in 16 years.

“It was cathartic,” said Plant about performing the 1971 Zeppelin classic. “People go, ‘Oh, that’s good. He never was going to do that.’ But I didn’t really do it. I just blurted it out, ’cause it’s such an important song to me for where I was at the time and where I was with Jimmy [Page] and with John [Paul Jones] and Bonzo. 

#robert plant #Robert plant music #Robert plant solo music #led zeppelin #new music #2024 #does this mean we get new music this year omg pls

59 notes · View notes

piratefalls · 6 months

Text

i'm sure everyone's tired of my rambling at the beginning of these, so let's just get to it. new list every wednesday!

list one. list two.

Even If It's Just Pretend by nontoxic

“The queen wants to show that the Prince and the First Son are still deeply in love and committed to their countries.” Ellen swallows. “They want you to go on a tour of the Commonwealth together, to get the public to see those emails not as a sex scandal, but an invasion of privacy of a wholesome, loving relationship.” “It was an invasion of privacy,” Alex says. He swallows. “Did they say what would happen if we say no?” Ellen’s lips pinch tightly at the corners. “Then they will issue a full denial and Henry will tour the commonwealth himself.” Alex doesn't hesitate. “Tell them we’ll do it. I’m not gonna let him do this alone." It would kill him. Henry hates this shit. The public parading, the judgment. Having to do all of that, and deny who he is? Alex at least wants to be there, to hold his hand through it. Even if it's just as a friend. It might kill Alex to pretend, but that’s a small price to pay to ensure Henry—his beautiful, vibrant, funny-as-hell, brilliant ex-not-quite-boyfriend—isn’t killed instead. --- or, the alex-never-goes-to-kensington-after-the-lake-house, exes-to-fake-dating-to-lovers fic.

I've carried this song in my mind by kiwiana

Henry lays eyes on Alex Claremont-Diaz for the first time in Rio, and it sends such a shockwave of longing and terror into the universe that Arthur feels it. Or, five times Arthur tries to get Alex and Henry together from beyond the grave, and one time two times his intervention isn’t needed.

Bear with me by phlebotinxm

The first time it happened, Henry was not having it. “For the last time, I’m not helping you shave your arse.” — In which Alex is very hairy, and Henry sort of has a thing for it. Not that he'd admit it, though.

Taking Control of the Histories by Qwert33

Singer ACD and Prince Henry announce their engagement to each other. The internet reacts. (+ the months after, a new album, resurfacing of old interviews, and public online flirting.)

Lost and Found by milowren

Pez turns to hand him his ticket, raising an eyebrow over one of his unsettling blue eyes. “It’s either too terrifying for you or too juvenile. It can’t be both.” “I’m not terrified,” Henry says sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. But as soon as the crowd in front of them clears and he’s able to see the entrance to the maze, he’s forced to recant that statement. Because standing just off to the side in the shadow of a giant inflatable jack-o-lantern, along with two girls that Henry vaguely recognizes through their costumes, is the most terrifying thing Henry has seen so far tonight. Alex Claremont-Diaz. ****** Alex and Henry are coworkers, Henry has a crush, and they end up at a haunted corn maze together a few nights before Halloween. Shenanigans ensue! Plus many horror movie references.

you handle it beautifully by HypnosTheory

“And I may have an idea for the libido problem too.” Henry sighs. “I don’t think this has risen to the level of therapy just because I can’t get hard.” “First off, nothing has to rise to the level of therapy, there’s no threshold for misery,” Alex says, parroting the words his therapist has told him about half a million times. “But no, I wasn’t thinking about therapy.” Henry raises a brow. “I was thinking we try party drugs.” - Alex, discovering Henry is having a hard time getting out of his head enough to enjoy sex, has a clear solution: recreational drug use! While on the road to self-discovery and self-actualization, Henry surprises Alex more than once. (3 times Henry surprised Alex + 1 time Alex shocked him right back)

Thirst Tweets & Mean Tweets [FOR APPROVAL] by loveonpurpose

MEMO: Official Transcript of Alex Claremont-Diaz and HRH Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor for BuzzFeed, Inc. Original video title: "Prince Henry Reads Thirst Tweets / FSOTUS Reads Mean Tweets" (2021). Filmed February 20, 2021. Approval status: PENDING This transcript is strictly confidential and may contain privileged and proprietary information, which is protected under applicable laws and intended solely for the use of The White House and Buckingham Palace.

in the shadow of two gunmen by matherine

There are over four hundred and thirty-three million guns in civilian possession in the United States. Alex isn’t sure where on the campaign trail that fact embedded itself into his brain — he thinks he picked it up from some memo between Minnesota and Missouri — but he’s never been able to forget it. It's one of those things he turns over and over in his head, running the numbers as if he could calculate the possibility of a bullet embedding itself in his brain. In the end, Alex thinks that it evens out. More people want to kill him than the average person (and that number has grown exponentially over the years) but now he also has Secret Service protection and can’t go anywhere without a motorcade. So, really, statistically, he figures that he has just as much of a chance of being shot by one of those 433 million firearms as anyone else, give or take a few decimal points here and there. But doing the math doesn’t make it any less terrifying when it actually happens.

Want you stealing my time by clottedcreamfudge

Henry has no idea what the rules are meant to be when you fall in love with your best friend thirty seconds after befriending them, but he supposes it doesn't matter anyway; he knows that Alex could never feel the same way - has always known that - and he considers himself lucky to have someone this fierce and full of life in his corner. He doesn't need more, no matter how much he may want it. Then Alex goes and ruins everything by daring to press him against the wall at a party and kiss him like his life fucking depends on it.

simply, don't by rizcriz

The first voicemail notification sits in Henry’s inbox when he lands in London. He stares at it for a long while before quietly dismissing it and shoving his phone unceremoniously into his pocket. His phone feels like lead in his pocket the entire ride back to the palace, fingers itching to pull it out and just listen. But he’s stronger than that, isn’t he? He left, he got on the plane, he made it home without once looking back. He had, though, contemplated the many steps it would take to turn around. Wondered if he could make it back with enough time to climb back into Alex’s bed and pretend none of this nightmare—the confession of love—had ever happened. But for every step he envisions himself taking back, three more lead him straight to Kensington Palace, because for whatever it is that he wants, there is only what he can have, and it is not a life with one Alexander Gabriel Claremont-Diaz. -- Or, Henry actually answers one of Alex's calls.

heart & home by railmedaddy

An exploration of life, love, friendship and family – one snippet for each week of Alex & Henry’s first year in their brownstone.

the love of my life, forever by coffeecatsme

“So,” the host of the talk show starts, eyes glimmering with excitement as he gazes at Alex over the desk, “your new single. I think anyone here would agree that it felt like a death by a thousand cuts, listening to those lyrics. If you don’t mind me asking… There’s been a lot of speculation online about who the song is about.” Alex flips his curls to the other side, trying not to smile. “Uh huh.” Or, 5 times the media speculates Alex is dating someone else and 1 time they realize he's been with Henry all this time.

You Can't Deny Me Anything by Dawg1515

“What happened?” Henry frowns deeply and presses his hand to Alex’s forehead. “You’re burning up, love.” Or: That night at the Lake House, Henry is getting ready to leave when Alex wakes up feeling sick. Faced with memories of losing his father, Henry decides to stay and take care of Alex. They have some things to talk out.

sparks fly (whenever you smile) by cxpbuck

When Alex wakes up after a particularly alcohol-filled night, he’s surprised by a blonde stranger in his bed. What’s more surprising, however, are all the messages on his phone congratulating his engagement to said blonde stranger.

how to have (normal) friends without fucking it up by ohgaywarden

Alex y’all are forgetting i started in georgetown when my mom was elected at least it’s not like the white house where they’ll bring the dogs out to sniff for weed cash and the ppos will probably check you for stuff but yeah… just don’t bring anything that would alert the royal protectors of the 4th in line for the throne Abbylol Anthony okay :) what time? -- Alex tries to make friends in law school.

a thousand, a million, billion thoughts, (all under the form of a letter to you) by CrayolaRainbow

Henry has been working on something in his office for the past week. Every time Alex asks him what it is, Henry just brushes him off with a simple “It’s a project, dear, nothing to worry about,” before throwing himself back into his work. He comes back, a week later, with a proposal he wants to show Alex. Or: Henry proposes to Alex with the help of a list, a powerpoint presentation, and some Very Gay Quotes.

buzzing by demigodbeautiies

“I mean, I respect the guts of anyone who thinks it’s a good idea to send a vibrator to the Prince of Wales,” Alex said, staring down at the little egg shaped thing in a box on their counter. “I can’t ever endorse this,” he replied, finally. -- Henry and Alex are sent a remote control vibrator. They find many, many uses for it.

A Tapestry of Intimacy Unfolded by Hqwhna

It's a case of textbook serendipity when Senator Alex Claremont-Diaz and Dr. Henry Fox first meet at a fundraiser in D.C. Now, Alex just has to think of an excuse to see him again...

Going Platinum by cricketnationrise

Email: [email protected] Channel Name: AustinBoy Age Restricted?: 18+ Chat enabled?: Yes Subscriptions: Monthly Tiers: 2 Tier 1:> Name: Standard > Description: Access to chat room, 1 weekly video Tier 2:> Name: Bonus > Description: Access to chat room, 1 weekly video, 1 weekly livestream

Or, a Camboy!Alex AU

A Taste of You by everwitch

On a few, select occasions, Henry has indulged Alex’s flirty banter, meeting Alex halfway with his own brand of dry wit. That is hardly advisable, of course, but Henry is only… well, not human exactly, but once upon a time he was, and sometimes he likes to reminisce about that. To recall what that existence had felt like. To watch a pretty young thing with a certain spark in his eyes smile victoriously when Henry admits he’s handsome. When Henry lets Alex take him home, he thinks he’s the only one who’s about to reveal his true nature. He’s wrong.

Hit (My Love) Out of the Park by bleedingballroomfloor

“It’s just — I’ve had such a hard time feeling like I really belonged. I think that’s what got me in the slump in the first place. But coming back here, seeing all the love I still got even though I’m not on the Rangers anymore… that really helped. And being on the Mets, being in New York — you helped with all of that. More than you’ll ever know.” Or, Alex and Henry are dumb, horny disasters. With an added bonus of baseball.

Engagement by SilverRosesAndDragons

Alex and Henry get engaged. They make a show of telling the world.

hear it in the silence (feel it on the way home) by orionseye

“It drives me nuts sometimes that you don’t get to have more say in your life. When I picture you happy, I see you with your own apartment somewhere outside of the palace and a desk where you can write anthologies of queer history. And I’m there, using up your shampoo and making you come to the grocery store with me and waking up in the same damn time zone with you every morning.” - page 296 Henry and Alex get everything they want after the 2020 elections: a beautiful home, fulfilling careers, a life together. But you need to heal first, to be able to love.

Sweetheart Grips by orestespdf

“Is this a good time to say that I haven’t done this before either, and that you should also tell me if it’s terrible?” Henry asks. Alex lets out a quiet laugh. His cheeks are ruddy with pleasure, the way some people get flushed when they’ve been smiling a while. Henry wants to do everything in his power to make Alex laugh again. The sound is intoxicating. “Sure thing, sweetheart,” Alex says with an easy grin. "I’ll log any complaints accordingly.” --- Rewriting a few RWRB sex-scenes with trans!Alex.

Hold the Moonlight In Your Hands by absolute-worst-idea (cxptained)

“Come on.” Henry tells him, tugging him to his feet and suddenly time is repeating itself. They sneak through the long grass, past the same PPO’s that snooze by the front door, before taking off at a run down that very same pier. “What are you doing?” Alex yells out, laughing as they come to the same halt as before, right under the brilliant night sky. The same stars look down on them. The same moon lights up their path, lights up Henry’s face, lights up his eyes and his smile. “I’m doing this right!” Henry says. There’s a lightness to his voice, a sparkle in perfect blue hues and Alex’s chest lifts just as it had done a year ago. ---------- The group find themselves back at the lake house, and Henry wants to make right that disastrous night with a marriage proposal that will change Henry and Alex's lives forever.

my gift is my song/and this one's for you by HestiaForever

It still amazes Henry, sometimes. That Alex loves him back; that the whole world knows and it’s okay. He turns his head and kisses Alex gently. The frizzing anxiety in his veins settles, and it’s like taking a breath of fresh air. Alex breaks away to smile against his lips. “Just like old times, huh? Do I need to let you go flee the country now?” OR Alex and Henry’s relationship, told through five holidays over five years.

The Red Side Goes Up by cmere

Henry brings home a little something new to try in the bedroom. Or: The One Where Alex Gets Jealous of a Butt Plug.

One Wild and Precious Life by SprigsofViolets

In 2015, Arthur Fox was diagnosed with cancer. He went into surgery to have a tumor removed from his brain, and fell into a coma. Nine years later, he wakes up.

Imagine Being Loved By Me by ladybonehollows

“Please tell me you're not so high in your ivory tower that you don't know what fanfiction is and that people write it about you." He can practically hear the sound of Henry rolling his eyes through the phone. “No, I know what it is, and I wish I could be surprised to learn that people have written it about me. None of that has ever inspired me to go looking for it.” Alex looks gleefully at the page in front of him. “Oh baby, I love how we can still surprise each other," he says. "I'm skipping to the good part, though.”

But Then You Found Me (And Everything Changed) by Lily_Padd_23, supernatural_mondler

Henry accidentally asks a question. Alex is more than ready with the answer.

if you want to be tagged in future lists, let me know!

#rwrb #rwrb fic #firstprince #red white and royal blue #alex x henry #fic rec #rwrb rec list

88 notes · View notes

sebsgirl71479 · 1 year

Text

AngelEyes

Sebastian Stan x Curvy!Female Reader

A/N: I am finally writing the first story I ever had an idea for. This is loosely based on the ABBA song AngelEyes. If you have a chance to listen to the song, it's a song I grew up listening to and singing at the top of my lungs. And only recently when listening to it, it made me think of Sebastian and his beautiful blue eyes. Also this is a bit of a self indulgent story, also this story is sort of a therapy for me since the unexpected passing of my brother in late 2021 so i named the dr on this story after him in his memory.

Please reblog and comment. They make me happy.

Word Count: 14,434 This is my longest fic, i think if i kept going it might have been 30,000

Warnings:18+ no minors, fluff, slight angst, blowjob, smut, unprotected sex (wrap it up kids) medical terms.

It was a beautiful spring day in New York City and you decided to take a walk towards central park. You leave your hotel to head out onto the streets of the city. Feeling crappy about your life, and job you decided to take a month long break and finally take that trip to New York you have always wanted to take. You had been very frugal with your spending for the last 5 years and had a hefty savings to let you stay in New York for more than you thought.

So here you are, the middle of march and spring is just starting and it's beautiful you picked the perfect time of year. As you walked along the streets you found a cute coffee shop and got yourself a white chocolate mocha and a few chocolate croissants to take to the park. As you leave the shop you start down the street and notice it's a little less crowded than it was before but you think nothing of it. All of a sudden you hear a snap above you, you look up and there is a huge couch dangling from the side of the building.

Everything's in slow motion at this point. All of a sudden you hear a man say “LOOK OUT!” you turn your head and as soon as you just barely see his face he grabs you by the waist and pushes you out of the way as the couch nearly misses you both.

Your coffee goes everywhere and your pastries hit someone in the head. You both land on the sidewalk and he tries to cradle your head so as to not have you hit it too hard on the ground. But things go a little black, in the distance you hear a voice. “Hey, hey are you okay? Please wake up. Oh god please wake up.” The voice starts to be more clear and you start fluttering your eyes open. As your vision starts to clear you see a man on top of you with the most beautiful blue eyes you have ever seen. You reach your hand up to touch his cheek, and that's when he looks directly at you. He smiles at you with a heart stopping grin. “Oh my god you're awake how are you, are you okay? What's your name sweetheart?”

“You have the most beautiful blue eyes I have ever seen. Honey what happened, why are you on top of me?” The man looks at you puzzled. “Honey? What do you mean I have no idea who you are. I saved you from a couch from falling on you. My name is Sebastian. What is your name?” “Baby you know my name, it's y/n we’ve been together for 2 years.” as soon as those words come out of your mouth your eyes cross and black out again. While you are completely passed out Sebastian is frantically calling 911 to get you an ambulance to the hospital but with the way Manhattan traffic is it would take forever to get there. Then He remembered he has a driver just across the street so being as careful as he can be he carries you over to his awaiting car and lays you down on the backseat with your head laying in his lap for support.

“Mr.Stan, is everything okay what happened?” “Marcus I need you to get me to Mount Sinai hospital as fast as you can please this woman has a major concussion.” “Yes Sir, I'll do my best and just hold on.” Since you were on the west side of the park Sebastian's driver had to cross through central park to get you to the hospital. He's driving as fast as he can through the park on 86th st and once he clears the park he heads to madison ave straight to mount sinai hospital. He screeches to a halt in the emergency area and goes to open the backseat to help Sebastain with the unconscious woman. He carries her through the sliding glass doors and starts looking around for a nurse or doctor to help him. A nurse spots him from a distance and notices the limp woman in his arms and immediately runs in his direction to help him. “Sir, sir is she okay what happened?” “Oh thank goodness, her name is y/n and i pushed her out of the way before a couch dangling from a building fell on her. She spoke for a minute and then she just passed out again.” “Alright sir what is your name and we can get her taken care of?” “My name is Sebastian, please you have to help her!” “We will do our best. I NEED A GURNEY OVER HERE NOW!”

A few seconds later 2 orderlies came by with a gurney and Sebastian laid her on the bed and followed her to an exam room behind a curtain. He stood in the corner of the room while the nurses started an IV on you and were telling orderlies to get a CT scan for you. A doctor came in and was being brought up to speed on what they were doing. All Sebastian could do was watch as this beautiful woman who he saved was being poked and moved around to make sure she was alright and would wake up. “Sir Im Dr Roberts, I’ll be taking care of your girlfriend from here on out. We will be taking her down the hall for a CT scan to make sure there isn't any brain damage then we will be taking her up to a room for recovery pending the results. Do you have any questions for me?” He was just staring at y/n almost completely zoned out. He just shook his head no and didn't correct the Dr when he called her his girlfriend.

As soon as they wheeled her out of the room, he came out of his reverie and took his phone out and called his driver. “Marcus don't wait around for me, go ahead and drive off and I will call you when I am done here. Have a good rest of your day and thank you for being so quick with getting to the hospital.” “You are welcome Mr Stan, I will be waiting for your call. I hope the young woman comes out of this okay.” “Thank you very much Marcus goodbye.” He put his phone back in his pocket and then a nurse came up to him at that moment. “Sir we will be bringing her to a room upstairs while we wait for the results of the CT scan.” “Okay, thank you very much. Um, is there anywhere I can get some coffee?” “Yes of course there is a coffee cart we will be passing by. I'll wait while you grab something then take you up.”

After grabbing his coffee he was led to your room, you werent there yet so he waited on the couch in the corner of the room. He was wracked with nerves waiting for them to bring you. He didn't know what to make of this situation. One minute he’s getting out of his car to head to lunch, the next he’s saving the life of a woman he barely had a conversation with. And then there's the part where you think we are a couple. He does know one thing, you are absolutely beautiful and he wants to get to know you better when this is all over. A few moments later the door opens and they are wheeling you into the room. Sebastian stands up and waits for them to settle you in the room and makes sure all your wires and IV’s are hooked up properly. Once everything is done the nurse turns to him, gives him a nod and smile and leaves the room. Sebastian is hesitant to approach you but he finally brings a chair from the side and drags it over to the side of your bed. He looks at your face, all peaceful and angelic. Your breathing is steady which is a good sign and your heart monitor is at a good rhythm. He then looks at your hand laying beside you and decides to hold it in his hand.

“I don't know what to say in this situation. This is all new to me, well I did tell you my name is Sebastain and apparently you and the hospital staff think we are a couple.” He laughs a little bit and shakes his head in disbelief. “Not that i wouldn't mind you seem like a sweet woman and you sure are beautiful and if it wasn't for this mess you're in i’d really like to get to know you better maybe ask you out on a date.” Just then he feels your hand twitch, and he looks at your face. Your hand then squeezes his and your eyes start to flutter open slowly. You groan a little bit with how bright the room is and then you begin to speak. “Hmmm too bright, someone lower the lights please.” Sebastian reaches over the side and dims the lights in the room. “Is that better sweetheart?” “Mmmm much better thank you.” Just then you look over to the man's voice and smile. You lift your hand up to his face and just hold it. “There's those beautiful angel eyes I fell in love with.” Sebastian then smiles and dips his head down in slight embarrassment.

“Honey, what am I doing in the hospital, what happened?” “Well sweetheart you were almost squashed by a couch that was falling from the side of a building but I got you out of the way in time.” Your eyes go cartoon wide listening to what Sebastian is telling you. “Oh my gosh baby are you okay, you weren't hurt were you?” Sebastian was absolutely loving you calling him all these pet names he was blushing a little bit. “No, I'm completely fine.” You just stare at each other for a while just taking in the others features like the other person will somehow vanish and commit it to memory. You hear a knock on the door and your doctor enters the room. “Hello y/n how are you doing? My name is Dr Roberts and you’ll be under my care while you are here. You gave us a bit of a scare there for a bit including this guy here, he was a wreck.” “I feel okay doctor, when can I go home?” “Well thats why im here we have the results of your CT scan and there was a little something that..” Just then Sebastain sits up and rushes to the doctor and asks him to speak outside the room. You look concerned for what's happening. “Sebastian is everything alright?” “Yes sweetheart, I just want to talk to the doctor for a minute before he gives you the results. Everything will be fine, okay just sit tight I’ll be right back.” With a smile and a nod of your head Sebastian and Dr Roberts exit the room.

“Okay doc here’s what's happening. This Is the first time I have met this woman and I believe she has amnesia. She thinks I'm her boyfriend of 2 years as she says and I don't want to traumatize her right now.” “Well that does explain the small abnormality I saw in her scans. Thank you for telling me this. I completely agree with you on this situation. Wait a moment, you're Sebastain Stan aren't you?” “Yes I am and now you understand that this situation just got complicated.” “Okay Mr Stan i know this will be a bit difficult especially considering who you are but you will have to keep pretending to be her boyfriend. Do you think you will be able to do that until her amnesia has faded?” “Dr Roberts I'm going to do my best, I'm just lucky I have a lull in film projects and I can try and devote my time for her recovery.”

Sebastian and the doctor shake hands and return to your room. The whole time they are outside in the hall you are a ball of nerves, wondering what they are talking about that Sebastian had to tell the doctor. When the door opened revealing Sebastian and the doctor you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. He comes over to your bedside and immediately holds your hand to reassure you things are good. “Y/N sorry to concern you but i was just telling your partner here that we did find some swelling in your brain but nothing some rest won't cure.” “Oh thank you so much Dr Roberts. So when I can go home, I really just want my own bed with my boyfriend by my side.” Sebastian then looks at you with a bashful smile and a slight blush on his cheeks. “We just want to keep you overnight for observation and you can be discharged late tomorrow morning.” With a big smile and a thank you to the doctor he takes his leave. Just then Sebastian gets an idea and turns to y/n. “Sweetheart, where's your purse? I want to make sure you didn't lose anything when I pushed you out of the way today?” “I’m not sure, oh look it's at the end of my bed in that plastic bag.” “Alright, while I do this, why don't you get some rest, your eyes look like you're about to fall asleep.” “You’re right baby, I am a little tired.” And just like that you were out like a light.

He hates to do this but he goes through your purse to see if you live in the city or if you’re from out of town. And he gets his answer when he sees the key card to the hotel you are staying at. He steps out of the room and walks down the hall to the waiting room to make a phone call. “Hello?” “Hey Ethan, it's Sebastain. I have a huge favor to ask you and I will tell you everything else later but I need you to come see me at Mount Sinai hospital.” “Holy shit Sebastian are you okay what happened!?”

“Ethan i’m fine, look just come to the hospital I’m on the 5th floor I’ll meet you by the elevators.” “Alright buddy I’ll be there as fast as I can.” Sebastian lets a big breath into the ceiling and closes his eyes. He starts thinking to himself how he is going to pull this off. This woman thinks they are together but ‘I wouldn't be opposed to that’, he tells himself. Fifteen mins later he hears the ding of the elevators and rushes over to see if it's his friend and assistant Ethan. As he rounds the corner Ethan looks over to see Sebastian walking towards him.

“Uh thank god you made it, look I need you to take this hotel key card from the Lucerne Hotel. Head up to this room and gather all the luggage and clothing in the room if you need help, that's fine but I’d rather this be as discreet as possible. You have my personal credit card with you?” Ethan nods his head yes. “Okay good, after you have gotten all the belongings together go to the front desk and check that room out early and I’ll pay the fees.” “Sebastian, are you going to tell me what is going on?” He lets out a big breath and goes into what happened from when he pushed you out of the way to you thinking Sebastian is your boyfriend and the plan he has with the doctor. After a min or 2 of ethan processing all the information he starts to talk.

“Dude this is the craziest thing i have ever heard, and you’re okay with doing this? Pretending to be this woman's boyfriend until she gains her memory back? Sebastian I get that you’re a compassionate person but you can see how nuts this is right?”

“Yeah man i know but what else am I going to do? This gorgeous woman is lying in a hospital bed with no memory of her previous life and knowing the truth could hurt her.” Ethan has a small smile on his face when he hears Sebastian call you gorgeous. “Okay Seb I’ll do this for you but we will have to have a talk about this more tomorrow, okay?” He nods his head yes and passes the key card to his friend, and he is on his way to the hotel to gather all your belongings.

Sebastian heads back to your room as quietly as he can so as to not wake you. You had a long hard day and you needed your rest. He sits at your bedside just watching you sleep peacefully. He gently holds your hand, it gives him a bit of comfort to hold your hand gives him peace. He didn’t know how long he had been watching you sleep until his phone started buzzing in his pocket. It was Ethan calling him. “Hey buddy what's up, is everything packed up?” “Oh yeah Seb but she has 2 huge pieces of luggage and a few carry-on bags. I don't think she was here for just a weekend trip, it looked like a lot longer. So I went to the checkout counter to get everything settled and she paid for an entire month here.”

“Wow, that's a long time to stay in a hotel especially in New York.” “Yeah so i told the concierge to cancel the rest of her stay and to put any fees left on your card as you asked.” “Alright great, take all her things and go to my place and put it in my bedroom. I want it to look like she's been there all this time. I don't want anything to upset her.” “Okay want me to hang up her clothes and stuff?” “Yeah that's a good idea. Ugh thanks man I really appreciate this, i owe you some drinks soon.” “You got it Seb, we’ll talk later.” Sebastian hangs up the phone and it's at that moment that you wake up. “Hey y/n how are you feeling? Did you get a good rest?” “Yeah I feel a little better, but I'm really hungry. I could really go for some pasta and those chocolate chip cookies from Levain bakery, the ones with walnuts.” “I'm sure I can handle that, I just need to make a few phone calls.”

As Sebastian was in the corner of the room making his phone calls you were staring at his large frame. Even from the back he was so sexy, you felt so lucky to be his. You weren’t a thin woman by any means, you were what everyone called plus sized but you preferred curvy. You still had a slightly flat tummy but you had extra hips and thighs and a chest that wasn't too big but a good size. To see a man as beautiful and sexy as Sebastian you definitely thanked all and any god out there that he chose you. You have the biggest smile on your face when he is finally done on the phone. He turns around and sees you smile and it looks like the stress and tension of the day has lifted from his body. He walks over to you and you reach out your hand to him as he sits in the chair by your bed. You love touching his face and seeing his eyes sparkle that's why you call them angel eyes.

“You look happy, what's got you smiling so much?” “You, that’s what is making me happy. Thank you for choosing me and loving me.” Hearing your confession gave Sebastian a sense of calm but also guilt because he doesn't know how this is going to end when you get your memory back. He didn't want to think about that right now, he just wanted to be in the moment with you. Someone he hopes he gets to be with even when all of this craziness comes to an end, if you’ll have him. Another 30 mins passes and there is a soft knock at your door and a nurse comes in with two brown paper bags. One with your pasta from La Pecora Bianca and your favorite blue label bag with your cookies.

You start making grabby hands at the food before Sebastian can get them out of the bags. He just laughs at your eagerness, but understands you’ve had a big day and are starving. You both share the whipped ricotta with honey and toast and the bucatini pasta. You look at everything in front of you and you want a cookie but you have to eat your dinner first so you resist the dessert. Sebastian gives you a few pieces of toast with the ricotta and honey, and you moan at the taste. “Baby you know me so well this is one of my favorites thank you.” Sebastian is a bit surprised that he got your food choices correctly. Maybe there was something to this whole you having amnesia. “Well darling, we have been together for a while. There are times where I have to guess but I was sure to be right this time.”

He serves you up some of the pasta and you both eat in comfortable silence. All Sebastian can think at this moment is that it was fate that you both met this way. There had to be a reason some god out there sent you to him. After you finished your dinner you went to sleep for the night. That gave Sebastian the time to head out and go home to change into more comfortable clothing and take a shower. He didn't want to leave you but it gave him time to think things over in his life and this situation he is in. When he went into his closet to grab a shirt to wear he saw your clothing that Ethan had put there earlier in the day. It almost looked like it belonged there. He ran his finger over the clothing and imagined you being in his home forever. Sebastian has never felt this strongly for someone let alone a stranger he’s only known for less than 12 hours. He somehow had to really make you his for real.

After getting a few hours sleep at home, he woke up and stretched his arms out and at the feeling of the other side of the bed he got a little sad. He didn’t have anyone to wake up to, he hadn't for while now. Sebastian looked at his phone to check the time and it was a little after 5am. So he got up and decided to get dressed for the day. After going to the bathroom and brushing his teeth and hair, he put on a pair of dark wash blue jeans and black shirt. He grabbed his shoes from the front door and slipped them on and grabbed his keys and coat and headed out the door back to the hospital. By the time his uber got to the hospital it was almost 6am, perfect time to make sure she was still sleeping and hopefully get you ready to leave the hospital.

He greeted the night nurses still on shift from when he left last night and slowly entered your room. You were still asleep thank goodness, the only noise being your heart monitor and a movie playing on the tv in your room. Sebastian decided to sit at the couch in the corner and go through a few emails he hadn’t gotten to yesterday. You didn't wake up for another 45 mins after he got there. He heard you groan and got up from the couch to make sure you weren't in any pain. “Hey there sweetheart good morning. Are you okay, in any pain?” “Good morning baby. My head hurts a bit and for some reason my butt hurts too. Maybe it's the bed that is not comfy.” Sebastian just laughs at your butt comment and you start to laugh too. After a little bit a nurse comes in to bring you your breakfast and to check your IV’s and to check your vitals. When you were done with your breakfast Dr Roberts entered your room to get you started on your discharge and after care for when you leave.

“Well so far everything looks good, you just have the small headache which has subsided at the moment. I don't see any reason why you should head home now.” “Thank you so much Dr Roberts, I can't thank you enough for the care you and your staff have given me.” “Yes thank you very much doctor.” Sebastian and Dr Roberts share a look you don't notice. The nurse comes back in and starts taking out your IV and the connections to the heart monitor. After that was done Sebastian came over and helped you get out of the bed so you could get dressed. Your legs were a little shaky standing up but he steaded you before you could fall.

“I didn't know what clothes to bring you so you’ll have to wear what you had on yesterday if that's okay?” “That’s okay honey these will be fine until we get home. I can't wait to take a shower. I feel icky.” You start untying the back of your gown and Sebastian turns around to give you your privacy. He caught a glimpes of the swell of your breast before he turned. “Baby you've seen me naked before, why did you turn around?” “Oh I don't really know sweetheart, do you need help?” “Just need help with my jeans if that's okay.” “Sure I can do that.” Sebastian turns around and tries to keep his eyes on your face. That's not difficult, you are so beautiful. He takes the jeans from the bed and begins to kneel down in front of you. He takes your right foot and places it in one leg then grabs your left and does the same all while looking right in your eyes. Once he’s shimmied them halfway he asks you to stand up to bring them the rest of the way. The way he looks at you while trying to bring up the zipper and buttoning your jeans is so erotic he can't help himself that he wants to kiss you so badly.

Breathlessly you speak his name. He looks from your eyes to your lips so quickly you almost miss it. The tension in the room is thick. Sebastian can't take it anymore. He brings his right hand up to cup the side of your face and you relish in his touch. He bends down and gives you the most featherlight kiss, almost hesitant. You bring your hands up his chest and around to the back of his neck. You grab the hairs at the back of his head and he lets out a moan that makes him deepen the kiss. You slip your tongue in his mouth and at that moment he can't control himself. He slides his hands from your face and brings them down your arms and lightly grazes your breasts.

He then wraps his arms around your waist and brings you closer and holds on like you may leave him at any time. He can't control himself, he starts moving his hands down your back and grabs a handful of your ass, eliciting a soft moan that has him hard in an instant. He has to stop, it's getting hard to stop, he can't help it. Sebastian slowly breaks the kiss and places his forehead to yours. His breathing is erratic like he just ran a few miles. He has never had a kiss like that in his life, he definitely has to find a way to keep you in his life he can't let you go. “Where did that kiss come from, baby? I'm not complaining at all, it's just that it was incredible.” “I don't know but I guess knowing that you could have died yesterday just drove me to kiss you to let you know how much I love you.” Sebastain’s heart skipped a beat and his brain stopped functioning like the scratch of a record. He doesn't know what brought him to tell you that when he hardly knows you but at the same time it felt right. “I love you baby, but I'm right here, I'm alive because of you. I'm not going anywhere.”

You put your shoes on and as you're putting on your cardigan, your nurse comes in with the discharge papers for you to sign and a wheelchair to ride out of the hospital. As you’re signing all the paperwork Sebastian is calling Marcus to have him meet the both of you at the entrance of the hospital. You exit the hospital and take a deep breath and breathe in the spring air that you love so much well for New York anyway. You see a black suv in front and a man holding a door open. “Sweetheart this is Marcus, my driver, he's going to be taking us home.” “Good morning Mr Stan, miss. I hope you are feeling better today?” “I am, thank you.” Sebastian helps you from the wheelchair and into the back of the car. Once he has your seatbelt buckled he runs to the other side of the car and scoots over to the middle to pull you into his side. You rest your head on his shoulder as Marcus pulls out onto Madison Ave. You still have a bit of a lingering headache so the rocking of the car on the streets lulls you to sleep. It's a good half hour to get Sebastain’s apartment, even though you fell asleep you could still hear everything going on around you. Every so often you could hear Sebastain and Marcus talking but sort of muffled. Then you could hear Sebastain softly talking to you, telling you that everything will be alright and telling you how beautiful you were. You smiled internally with his reassurances. You felt the car lurch forward alerting you that you had finally stopped.

“Sweetheart we’re home.” With a sweet kiss to your head you sat up and gave him a kiss on the cheek as Marcus came over and opened the door for you. Sebastian unbuckled your seat belt and you took Marus’ hand to exit the car. You thank Marcus and Sebastain is already at your side to make sure you're steady on your legs before walking you into the building. In no time you are standing in front of his apartment door about to enter. “Okay, home sweet home angel. Where do you want to go in the living room or do you want to lay down on the bed?” Sebastian was trying to calm his heart if you said you wanted to lay on his bed. “I can sit in the living room for now if that's okay?” “Sure baby but anytime you want to lay down in bed just let me know.” He intertwines your hands together and you both feel that spark of something as he walks you over to the sofa.

“Do you want anything to drink or maybe a snack to eat?” “Can I just get a glass of ice water baby? That would be great, my mouth is still dry from sleeping so much.” “Anything for you.” He bends down and gives you a kiss on the forehead and heads into the kitchen to get your water. As he is doing that you look out the window and admire the New York skyline. Something in the back of your mind says that this seems very new and different but you put that away for another time. As you’re still looking out the window Sebastain can see you from the kitchen. He’s admiring you from a distance seeing how the sun's rays fall on your face so beautifully. He just stands there watching you for a few mins trying to figure out how he got lucky to meet you even though it was in an unconventional way. He walks over to you but you don’t notice, just staring out the window, not until you feel the sofa dip and then turn your head and give him a big smile.

“Has the view always been this beautiful?” “I never really noticed it until you came into my life.” Sebastian shocked himself with that response. He didn't know where that came from but that made you smile even bigger if that was even possible. After that kiss in the hospital he can't let you go. He’s never felt this intense about anyone ever. Bringing his hand up to the back of your neck and lightly rubbing the base of your neck you let out a small moan that has Sebastain bringing your face closer to him. You feel yourself moving closer to him and you open your eyes in time to see his lust blown eyes staring at you. Your breath hitches at the way he is looking at you. It's so intense you don't know if you can look away. His eyes flick to your lips as you poke your tongue out to wet your lips and that seals it for him. He crashed his lips to yours in a passionate kiss that has your toes curling. You bring your hands up to curl into his hair and he lowers his hands down your back at the same time and as if you two are in sync he grabs your ass as you tug on his hair and you both let out simultaneous moans.

In an instant Sebastian has you on your back gently lowering you down to make sure you don't hit your head on the arm of the sofa. It gets heated immediately and it's all teeth and tongue. Hands grabbing at anything just to feel each other. Sebastian lowers his hips between your legs as you spread them wide for him. He is rock hard now and starts grinding his cock into your clothed pussy, both so enraptured in one another. This goes on for a while, you bring your hands up underneath his shirt to touch his skin. He moves from your lips down your neck biting and sucking on your skin eliciting the most eriotic sounds coming from your mouth. “Oh god Sebastain.” “Y/N, you feel so good under me. I can't stop myself.” He comes back to your lips and tangles his tongue with yours searching for dominance. In his mind he just wants to rip all your clothes off and have you right here on the sofa, but he is having a really hard time stopping. While he's grinding down on you he is hitting your clit perfectly, getting you to your peak in no time.

“Sebastian, baby, I'm gonna cum don't stop!” “I don't plan on stopping anytime soon sweetheart.” He feels like a teenager dry humping his girlfriend but in reality you're really not his. After knowing how you are under him kissing and touching he won't let go. “Sebastian, look me in the eyes baby.” He brings his head up front he croke of your neck to look at you. He looks wrecked but so beautiful. “Come on angel eyes let go for me I'm right there.” With one last thrust of his hips he hit you in the right spot for the both of you and you came together. How did this almost feel better than actual sex? You look him in the eyes as you both come down from your highs, never looking away in fear of the other leaving. Something comes over Sebastian right then and there. An overwhelming need to say those 3 little words again to you. “Y/N I love you so much. I don't know who sent you to me but I'm so glad they did.” Sebastian was in a daze from the heavy makeout and teenage humping session. But he is not taking that back anytime soon. He gives you a small peck on the lips as he starts to get up from the couch. “I'm going to take a quick shower and change clothes. It'll be just 5-10 mins and then you can take that nice hot shower you wanted, Does that sound okay?” “Sure baby, I’ll be fine here while you're gone.”

Sebastain gives you a kiss on the forehead and heads into the bedroom to grab some fresh clothes and then enters the bathroom turning on the shower to get it going. He takes off his clothes and throws them in the hamper and then gets into the shower. He brings his head under the shower stream trying to calm his racing heart. His brain is telling him this is completely crazy to fall in love with someone he hardly knows and on top of that she has no memory of her previous life. But his heart, his heart is telling him to fall completely for this woman. Give her everything his heart and soul will offer. After a few mins of his brain and heart debating he grabs his body wash and starts washing the remnants of his cum from his body and quickly washes his hair. Once he's done rinsing off he turns off the shower and grabs a towel from the rack and wraps it around his waist after drying off.

He grabs his clothes from the counter slipping on his boxer briefs and dark gray sweat pants and black tank top. He picks up his brush and combs his wet hair back in a slicked back look. He comes back into the living room with you still looking out the window. “Sweetheart, the bathroom is all yours.” “Okay, I’ll probably be a little while.” You stand up from the couch and give him a hug before you head to the bedroom to grab your clothes. He smells so good you don't want to let go. “Don’t forget most of your clothes are in the closet and your underwear is in the top left drawer of the dresser.” You pull back from the hug and give him a kiss on the cheek and head to the room. You walk the short hallway and see the bedroom door ajar and enter. You look around like you’re trying to familiarize yourself with the room.

You go to the dresser and find your underwear and grab a cute pair of pink panties and go to the closet and see your clothes right next to Sebastian’s. You find your black biker shorts and look over to Sebastian’s side and decide to steal one of his shirts. You decided to take his soft pink hoodie sweater for yourself. With a little giggle you head over to the bathroom to take your much needed shower. You see all your face creams and makeup on the counter and graze your hand over them. Just seeing them warms your heart a bit. You turn on the shower as hot as you can stand and remove your clothes and toss them in the hamper by the shower. You get in and just relish in the feel of the hot water soothing your skin. You stand under the stream of water for a while before you reach for your shampoo and start cleaning the hospital smell and the reminisce of your organism from your body. You finally finish scrubbing your body with your sugar scrub and rinse off. You turn off the water and grab a towel and start drying off.

What you didn't know was that while you were taking your shower Sebastian was just outside the door listening to you hum while showering. He couldn't figure out if it was an actual song or something random. He got his answer when you sang the chorus to ' ‘We don't have to take our clothes off’. That's one of his favorite songs. Just as you turned off the shower he headed back into the living room and turned on the tv to look like he had been there the whole time.

You put your clothes on and then wrapped the towel around your head to exit the bathroom. When you get to the living room Sebastian is laying on the couch with his arm slung on the back and his right leg stretched out on the couch with his left leg dangling off the side. When you come into view he looks up from the tv and his breath hitches and his heart almost stops. You stand there in shorts he can barely see because of how long his sweater is covering it. You’re wearing his clothes and you look almost nervous of his reaction to it. “Oh my god, sweetheart is that my sweater?” “Yeah it felt so soft and smelled like you. I wanted to wear it. Is that okay?” He stands up and takes in your form. Walking slowly to you he stands just a foot away from you. He never let any of his former girlfriends wear his clothes but you look absolutely gorgeous in them. “Sweetheart, how does this look better on you than me?” With a bashful smile you dip your head down in slight embarrassment. Sebastian takes your chin in his hands and brings you back into view. “Don't be bashful baby, if you look this good in my sweater you can wear anything of mine.”

The rest of the day goes by in a flash with you both laying on the couch and watching tv. Sebastian orders Chinese for dinner and when you all are done it is time for bed. Sebastian was a little nervous but excited to share a bed with you.

After what happened today on the couch he had to remind himself to keep it PG tonight. You both get into bed and you reach over to turn off the lamp on your side of the bed and scoot over towards the middle to reach Sebastain. He gladly accepts you into his arms. You lay your head on his shoulder and wrap your arm around his torso. You trace little patterns on his chest as you start to fall asleep with his warmth and scent of bergamot and citrus. “If i didn't say it already, thank you for saving my life angel eyes I Love you.” And just like that you were fast asleep. Sebastian laid awake for a few more minutes staring at the ceiling. He had to keep you even after your memory came back. When his eyes start to become heavy with sleep he turns his head to look down at you snoring a little bit. “Goodnight y/n I love you.”

The first few days after you left the hospital have been great. The day after, Sebastain had to go out and have a business lunch with his assistant Ethan, but other than that he has been by your side to make sure your recovery from the accident went well. Sebastain has been very attentive and made sure you had whatever you needed. It's been a little over a week since you had your accident and you still have a lingering headache. You called Dr Roberts to make sure it was okay to still have these pains, and he reassured you that with the concussion you had it was normal. With that you had to keep taking ibuprofen for the headaches to ease them.

After being cooped up in the apartment for over a week you are starting to feel like a caged animal. So you think it's time to head out into the world and take in the city for a bit. “Sebastian, honey, do you think we can go outside today? I'm feeling a little claustrophobic and I think a little walk around the neighborhood would do us some good. What do you say?” He looks at you a little puzzled but starts to think quickly on his feet. “Sure sweetheart, do you just want to walk or do you have any destinations in mind?” “I just want to walk, and if anything catches my eye can we do that if it's okay with you?” “That would be good with me, I just need to make a quick call to Marcus and see if he's available in case you can't walk back to the apartment okay?” “Alright baby, I’ll just be in the bedroom getting ready.”

As you went to get ready, he shot off a text to Marcus and then made a quick call to Ethan. “Hey buddy how's it going with y/n is she remembering anything?” “No so far no change, look she wants to go out and take a walk around the neighborhood since she's been cooped up in the apartment since i brought her home from the hospital. I need to make sure we get no unexpected pictures taken of us. Please keep an eye out on any and all social media that may pop up with any pictures of us. I don't want her to worry about trying to escape paparazzi or some fans that may discover her. I know it's going to be hard but I want to shield her as much as possible.” “Yeah sure I can do that for you, I’ll even let you know if the paps are anywhere near the area to make sure you don't run into any of them” “You're the best man, okay I’ll talk to you later.”

Just as he hangs up the phone you leave the bedroom wearing a pair of cute galaxy leggings, a tank top with your black cardigan and your low top converse sneakers. Sebastian gives you a big smile and extends his hand to you to take. “You ready to go sweetheart, New York awaits?” “You’re such a goofball baby.” “Yeah but I’m your goofball.” You shake your head at his silliness and head out of the apartment. As you head out of the building you lift your head up to the sky and let the sun shine on your face like it's the first time seeing it. You let out a deep breath and look over at Sebastian. He takes your hand and you head down the sidewalk on your little walk.

You take it slow since you still have that lingering headache. You both walk in comfortable silence taking in your surroundings. As you're walking Sebastian notices a vendor selling flowers. You both walk up to check out what he has. You see a beautiful bunch of pink hydrangeas and you glide your fingers over the pedals. After admiring them for a bit you look at the rest of the flowers on display. Sebastian sees this and looks over at the vendor and points to the hydrangeas you were looking at and he grabs to bushels and he pays for them, while you are busy petting a cute golden retriever that came up with its owner. He finishes paying for the flowers when the dog finally leaves and you turn around to see Sebastian holding out the flowers you were admiring.

“I saw you looking at these and I thought these might make you smile.” “Oh Sebastain, they are beautiful, I love them.” With a bashful smile he takes your hand and you continue your walk. So far Sebastian hasn't gotten any messages from Ethan so that's a good sign. You make it around the block and you see the cutest thing on earth. Two little girls, they look to be around 8 or 9 selling lemonade and iced tea. “Oh Sebastain isn't that the sweetest thing ever? Let's go buy a drink from them?” He couldn't say no to you wanting to help out these two little girls. “Okay sweetheart, anything for you.” He gave you a quick kiss on the lips and you both headed towards the girls. You approached the girls asking them how much for a lemonade. They told you it was $1.50 per cup, so you asked them for 2 lemonades. As Sebastian took his wallet out the girls noticed he looked familiar and were whispering to each other. That's when one of them spoke up. “Excuse me sir, but aren't you Bucky Barnes?” When the little girl says that you look over at Sebastian who is now eye level with them with wide eyes. You would remember that your boyfriend was an actor. Why are you so shocked? “Yes I am sweetie.” He gives the girls each an autograph on a napkin they have and they hand him the cups. Just after paying for the drinks he puts a $50 bill in their tip jar and the girls squeal with excitement. Sebastian hands you your drink and you start walking back towards the apartment. With that information on your mind you ask him.

“Baby, you're an actor? How come I don't remember?” Sebastian thinks quickly on his feet with your question. “Angel, you know I'm an actor. It must be the headaches you’ve been having. Making you forget a few things.” “Yeah you’re probably right. I don't know why I forgot.” Letting out a short breath of relief you keep walking towards your building and back into the safety of the apartment. Sebastian checks his phone again after interacting with the two little fans and so far no unexpected postings about it or pictures. That walk was almost too easy for him to not have a spontaneous photo of him out in the city. You find a vase to put the hydrangeas in and then place them in the middle of the coffee table so you can always look at them.

Sebastian heads into the kitchen to start making dinner for the both of you. When you finish your meal you take the dishes from the table and start getting them rinsed to put them into the dishwasher. While you do that your mind starts to wonder and you think back to when you came home from the hospital and had your heavy makeout session on the couch. You think about it and you and Sebastain haven't had any sex since then which you think is a bit strange. You want to bring it up but don't want to upset him. After a bit of a debate in your head and putting the final dish in the washer you wash your hands and head into the bedroom where Sebastian is laying in bed reading a book.

You watch him from the doorway just taking him in. It's now or never you tell yourself. You go into the closet to change out of your clothes and just slip on an old band t-shirt to sleep in. As you exit the closet you see Sebastain follow you as you walk over to your side of the bed. You get under the covers and scoot over to lay your head on his chest. “Sebastian? How come we haven't had sex in the past week?” Sebastian stiffens a bit but you don't notice. “Well honey I wanted to make sure that you had recovered well enough before we did anything too strenuous. Especially with these pains you're getting I didn't want to make it worse.” “I understand that angel eyes but I’ve heard that sex is good for headaches.” With a little bit of a smile you look up at him with hooded eyes. Your hand begins to wander down his chest and you graze his abs and feel him clench his stomach. He drops his book to the floor and rolls over on top of you and brings his lips to yours in a passionate kiss. His brain is on autopilot, he’s wanted to have sex with you since that first day back home but has been too afraid to initiate.

You bring your hands up to his shoulders and around his neck. He has you caged in and you can feel his hard cock against your thigh, so you spread your legs wider to bring him closer to your core. Since you’re only wearing your t-shirt and panties Sebastian can feel how wet you are for him. Plus he isn't wearing any underwear under his sweats so he is getting harder with every feel of her pussy. Sebastian brings his left hand down your body squeezing your breast on his way to your soaked panties. “Oh god baby please take me. Make love to me please.” “Sweetheart, I'm gonna make you feel so good. I’ve been going crazy not being able to touch you like this.” You cradle his face in your hands to have him look you in the eyes. “I love you so much angel eyes, I’m yours baby.” “I love you too y/n. Please don't leave me? I can’t live without you.” Seeing the vulnerability and sincerity in his eyes almost makes you want to cry. You wonder where all this came from.

“I’ll never leave you baby. I’m right here, always.” With that confirmation Sebastian goes in for a bruising kiss at the same time rips your panites off and starts peeling off his sweats in a matter of seconds. He’s hungry for you. You can feel it in the kiss and the rush to get all offending clothing off. He nudges his still leaking cock to your clit that makes you let out the most sinful moan he’s ever heard. Feeling how wet you are he knows he doesn't have to prep you. Sebastian gives you one last peck on the lips as he starts entering your weeping pussy. As he enters your face contorts in a cross between pain and pleasure so he stops to make sure you're okay. “Sweetheart, are you okay, do you want me to stop?” “No, please don't stop, you feel so good Sebastian.” He starts moving forward and gets lost in the feel of you as he keeps moving. He has found his heaven inside you. Once he has entered you fully to the hilt he has to control his breathing to make sure he doesn't cum too soon.

You move your hips to let him know you’re ready. He starts off slow at first just relishing in the feel of your wet pussy. You bring your hands down his arms and around to his back scratching down his back until you reach his ass. He really likes that you grabbed his ass and started going faster with the feel of your hands holding him making him go harder. “Harder baby, I can take it, don't hold back.”

“Sweetheart you keep saying things like that i won't last much longer.” He takes his right arm and holds on to the headboard for leverage and starts hammering into you at a fast pace making you arch your back and bringing your breast towards his face. He takes the opportunity and wraps his mouth around one of your breasts and starts licking and suckling on them like he's trying to get milk out of you. You bring your hands onto his hair and start tugging and scratching at his scalp. He keeps up his fast pace, not wanting to stop anytime soon.

“Mmmmm Sebastian oh god baby i'm so close dont stop!” “I’m almost there too. Cum with me sweetheart. Come on, I can feel you squeezing me so tight.” His cock is hitting you just right just kissing your g-spot and the little hairs at his shaft are grazing your clit with the right pressure. “Yes, yes, yes right there baby don't stop oh im cumming!” “I’m right behind you angel, look at me when you cum, i want to see those beautiful eyes.” You flutter your eyes open and look into those beautiful gray-blue eyes. He brings his forehead to yours while still looking at you. After 2 more thrusts of his hips you’re falling over the edge as your orgasim crashes over you. You’re squeezing him so tight he can hardly move. His thrusts start getting erratic and all of a sudden he’s cumming inside you.

“Jesus christ baby, I cant stop cumming i can’t stop.” As he says this you are in your orgasmic haze trying to make this last as long as you can. He brings his mouth to your ear and starts praising you. Tell you how good you feel. “Oh shit there's so much cum baby. I don’t think I've cum this much ever.” “It's alright honey, you made me feel so good and hey I don't feel my headache anymore.” With a little giggle you hid your face in the crook of his neck from embarrassment. Sebastian joins you in your laughter as he lays his head on your chest. You start carding your hands through his hair as he keeps a hold of your body tight. He doesn't want to let go of this moment. He just had the most amazing sex with you and he doesn't want to lose you. Even after his cock has softened he stays inside you just loving your warmth never wanting to remove himself.

Sebastian starts dozing off with you rubbing his back and head so deliciously plus your warm wet pussy mixed with both your orgasims he’s in heaven. “I love you so much y/n. Please don't ever let go, I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you in my life.” You look down at him with tears in your eyes. You can feel his own tears on your chest. How can you ever leave this wonderful man? He has been so caring and wonderful. “Angel eyes look at me please?” Sebastian looks up from your chest putting his chin on top. You wipe his tears from his face and kiss his forehead, he’s really loving the little pet name you gave him. “Oh my sweet Sebastian, don’t cry. Please, you're breaking my heart with your words.”

“I’m sorry, I just… can't see my life without you in it and I feel like this is a dream and when I wake up you won’t be by my side.” You see the inner turmoil he is having and you just want to hold him to you for the rest of your life and take his pain and doubts away. “I have an idea, do you have a pen and a notepad in your nightstand?” “Yeah I think I do, why do you want it?” “Just grab it and I’ll tell you my plan.” Sebastian reluctantly removes himself from you and rolls over to his side of the bed and looks through his drawer. He finds a pen and blue post-it notes. He hands them over to you and you slowly get up and rest your back on the headboard.

“Okay here's my idea, I don't want you having any doubts about us so I'm going to write on this post-it something that you and i can look at everyday to reassure you I will always be here for you.” Sebastian rests his head on your shoulder as you write on the post-it. When you finish you show him what you wrote. ‘I, y/n always promise to love and cherish Sebastian for as long as he will let me. And I hope to smash any doubts he has with my love for him. I made this promise in March 2023.’ He takes the post-it and looks it over and gives you the biggest smile. You take it back and sign your name at the bottom and Sebastian signs it to verify it further. He places the post-it above the bed and kisses his fingers and places it on the paper and you do the same to seal the deal.

You wake up the next morning with no lingering headache at all, which makes you very happy at least you don't have to take any ibuprofen today. You stretch your sore limbs and notice Sebastian isn't in bed. You look at the clock to check the time and it's already 9am. You sit up and you hear music playing in the living room. You get up and head over to the dresser and put on a pair of underwear and slip on your t-shirt from the night before. As you walk down the hall towards the kitchen you hear Sebastian playing his 80’s music playlist. Walking further you see him standing at the stove making breakfast. He hasn't put a shirt on today and is only in his basketball shorts cooking. As you admire his impressive backside you walk over and snake your arms around his torso and lay your cheek to his shoulder blades. “Good morning handsome, what are you making today?” “I’m making french toast and bacon. Coffee is brewing right now so it will be ready soon. Why don't you grab some mugs for us while I finish up here?” Giving his back a kiss you move over to the other side of Sebastian and get 2 coffee mugs for your drinks. Shuffling over to the fridge you grab the creamers for the coffee and place them on the kitchen counter. Sebastian finishes up the rest of the french toast and grabs the bacon from the oven where it has been warming in. He serves up both of your plates with a generous amount of toast and 4 slices of bacon each.

“Here you go sweetheart, I hope you enjoy it.” Sebastian tells you as he kisses your head. “You made it so I'm sure I will love it.” Both of you eat breakfast in comfortable silence just enjoying each other's company, every once in a while you play footsie with each other making you giggle when he finds a tickle spot on your foot or leg. Once you both are done eating Sebastain takes the dishes and puts them in the dishwasher to clean. “I’m going to take a shower. If you want to join me, I'll leave the door open for you.” With that you start walking back down the hall while taking your shirt off on the way showing Sebastian you’re only wearing your panties. Looking over your shoulder you give him a little wink and head into the bathroom to start the shower. Sebastian just stands there dumbfounded staring at an empty hall. His brain finally starts working again as he hears the water turned on in the shower. He takes off towards the bathroom just as you close the shower door.

He watches your silhouette through the door as you start wetting your hair under the shower head. He practically rips his shorts off and slowly opens the door and comes in behind you. You turn around to face Sebastian and without a word you grab his hair and bring him to your lips for a kiss that almost makes his own legs buckle. You backed him up against the tiled wall and took control, gently stroking his cock as well as trailing kisses down his neck and chest. Sebastian’s breath hitched as you grazed your tongue over his nipple and tugged it a little. Not stopping your assault down his body, you licked his happy trail from his belly button down to his now leaking cock. Looking up at him you took your tongue and licked him from shaft to tip and gave his head a little suck to gather his pre cum.

“Jesus christ, baby what are doing to me, that mouth is sinful?” You just hum around is cock and keep your up and down pace. Sebastian can't believe what's happening, this woman he has only known for a few weeks is giving him the blowjob of a lifetime. It is taking everything in him to not stop you, get down on one knee and ask you to marry him. He watches you as you hollow out your cheeks and take him deeper and take your free hand and tug on his balls. “Shit baby ugh im gonna cum.” At that you go farther down and suck his cock at the same time and that brings him to his peak as his cum shoots down your throat. You greedily take everything he gives you, not coming up for air until you have licked all of his cum. When you’re done, you look up at him. Using the shower bench for leverage to stand up, Sebastian comes out of his haze and grabs you by the arms and turns you so your back hits the wall and kisses you till you cant breath. He pulls away and places his head in the crook of your neck trying to get his heart and breathing back to normal, but what he has to say can’t wait. He comes back and looks you in the eyes as you hold your face in place.

“I don't know what I did in this life to deserve a woman like you, but I can't wait any longer. I don't have anything at the moment but, y/n please will you marry me?” The look on your face shows you’re still coming back from that intense kiss but soon sober up at Sebastians words. There is so much love, adoration and sincerity in his eyes you can't help but dive head first. “Yes Sebastian, I'll marry you. My beautiful angel eyes.” You both stand under the spray of the shower holding each other. Sebastian is crying silent tears at how happy he is at this moment, he doesn't want to lose this. Sebastian raches over and grabs your shampoo and has you turn around so he can wash your hair. He keeps his head down a bit so you don't see how red his eyes are, he doesn’t want you to worry. After he finishes shampoo and conditioning your hair, you do the same for him. By the end the water is starting to run cold so you turn off the water and exit the shower. It's a comfortable silence between you. Sebastian takes two towels and hands you one, but instead of drying yourself off you bring your towel to Sebastian and start drying him off. He takes the hint and starts drying you with his towel, giving each other small kisses on the lips or shoulders or neck.

You spend the rest of the day wrapped up in each other in bed, just enjoying the comfort. So much so you both almost forgot to eat dinner. From the comfort of the bed Sebastain has food delivered to the apartment at 9pm. After all the boxes are taken to the trash and you straighten out the bed, Sebastian comes back in and starts looking through his dresser for something. “Sebastian, is everything okay? What are you looking for?” “I could have sworn my mother gave me a curtain piece of jewelry just in case.” “What is it baby?” “Ah here it is, I knew I had it hidden away so no one would find it.” You just start laughing at him at his success in finding said item. He comes back over to the bed with his hands behind his back. When he sits down beside you he grabs your left hand and slides a small but beautiful ring on your finger. “It's not much but it was my mothers when she got engaged to my father. Europeans aren’t into flash, more simplistic, plus my parents didn't have much money then so my father got her this. Do you like it?” You lift your hand to the light to get a good look at it. It's so simple and delicate, almost something out of time. You look up at Sebastian with one tear coming down your cheek. “Sebastian, it's perfect, I don't need anything else but you and this ring. That you trust me with something that belonged to your mother, I'm honored.” Sebastian leans in and kisses you into the mattress, deep and slow.

It’s now 3am and Sebastian is wide awake watching you sleep next to him, seeing the ring glimmer in the moonlight from the window. He’s been awake for the past 15 mins watching you sleep and staring at the ceiling. Going through his mind trying to think of ways to keep you in his life when your memory comes back. He did propose to you so he is hoping that maybe some of the memories you two made during this time will stay with you and show you how amazing you are together. He’s also thinking about what he’s going to say to his family and friends about this whole situation. His mom is going to freak out but she will love you. Now his friends, that's a different story, he hopes they will be open minded. He’s practically giving himself a headache with all this thinking. So he rubs his forehead to ease the pain and just turns over and holds you close to his body. “I love you so much y/n please stay with me. I don't know what I will do if you ever left me.” “Mmmm I love you too Angel eyes, go back to sleep baby.” Sebastian kisses your shoulder and closes his eyes and lets your warmth lull him to sleep.

The next morning goes by like usual, but today you made a simple breakfast in bed for Sebastian. Some cut up fruit, rustic bread toasted topped with avocado and eggs and your regular coffee. After having your meal, you got up to bring the dishes into the kitchen when you started to feel a more intense headache coming. You started to sway a little and Sebastian noticed your distress. “Y/N are you okay? What's going on?” He is jumping out of bed just as you drop the dishes. “Sebastian, something isn't right…” Before you can get any more words out you faint. Sebastian was able to catch you before you hit the floor and is now holding your limp body.

He’s trying to shake you awake but nothing is happening. “Sweetheart, Please wake up please i can't lose you please wake up.” Sebastian is able to reach over to the nightstand and grab his phone to call 911. As soon as he gets off the phone he calls Ethan to let him know what is happening and will be meeting you both at the hospital. As soon as the paramedics reach the apartment Sebastian lets them know they need to head to Mount Sinai Hospital since Dr Roberts knows about your condition. You are still unconscious as you arrive at the hospital. They rush you in with Sebastian running alongside you. One of the paramedics finds a nurse and has you brought into one of the exam rooms. “Please someone tell me what's happening? Where is Dr Roberts? He knows my fiance's condition, PLEASE GET HIM HERE NOW!”

“Mr Stan, he is on his way right now, but I need you to calm down, we will take good care of your fiance’.” Sebastian collapses into the wall almost shaking in fear and crying. As the nurse tries to calm him down Dr Roberts enters the room, and Sebastian sighs in relief. “Mr Stan, I wish we were meeting under different circumstances, can you tell me what happened?” “ We were just finishing our breakfast in the bedroom and she got up to take the dishes into the kitchen when she started feeling an extreme headache. She began to speak as she dropped the plates and then she fainted. I caught her before she could hit the floor too hard. Please tell me if she is going to be okay?” “Alright we are going to check her vitals then take her back down to CT, but for the sound of it it seems that maybe the small swelling she had has subsided but we will check to make sure. Please be prepared for things to change knowing what may happen.” Sebastian nodded his head and then you are on your way to CT.

While you are in CT, Ethan arrives at the hospital and finds Sebastian in your exam room. “Sebastian, what happened man, is she going to be okay?” Sebastian lifts his head up and Ethan sees his red eyes and cheeks stained with tears he thinks the worst. “I don't know, she was still unconscious when they took her to get a CT scan. The doctor thinks that the small swelling she had may have gone down and told me to prepare myself. Ethan I have to tell you something and you're gonna tell me I’m crazy but just hear me out…. I love her man, I’m in love with her and 2 days ago I asked her to marry me and she said yes.” All Ethan can do is stare at him in udder and complete shock. “Hey, say something I’m freaking out here already.”

“What? I don’t know what to say man. The time that she has been with you I have noticed how much happier you are and lighter, She’s brought something out in you that i’ve never seen. Now I know she's not the typical girl you go for but that doesnt matter, she's a great woman. If you’re happy man then I’m happy for you no matter how crazy everything has been.”

With a big sigh of relief he stands up and gives Ethan a big hug. Five mins later Dr Roberts enters the room with y/n in toe. “She’s still unconscious but we hope she will wake up soon. As suspected the swelling has gone down so she won't be having those headaches anymore but yes it seems she may be getting her memory back. Now it’s just a waiting game, I will stick around the ER here in case she wakes up and i’m needed.” “Thank you doctor, I really appreciate everything you have done.” You are very welcome. Oh also congratulations, I hear she's your fiance’ now?” The doctor gives him a little smirk. “Um, yeah I think it kind of progressed pretty quickly with us,but doc I am truly in love with her.” “Well for your sake I hope everything works out after all of this.” With that Dr Roberts leaves Sebastian and Ethan with you.

After almost 2 hours of waiting you start to stir and groan in the bed. Sebastian sees this and presses the call button and immediately a nurse calls through and he asks her for a nurse and Dr Roberts to come to the room because you are waking up. Not 2 mins later a nurse and the doctor enter the room and wait for you to wake up fully. Your eyes begin to flutter open and you start to look around the room. You see the doctor and nurse with wide eyes, then you look to your left and see 2 men in the room. One of them you don't recognize but when you see the man sitting in the chair next to you holding your hand your eyes become comically huge. In your mind you are wondering, why is Sebastain Stan in my room and holding my hand, also why does it look like he’s been crying? “What's happening, why am I in a hospital?” You begin to croak out. The Doctor walks forward towards your bed. “Hello, y/n my name is Dr Roberts. You are at Mount Sinai Hospital in New York. What do you remember?”

“The last thing i remember is i was walking out of a coffee shop on my way to central park when i heard someone yell ‘look out’ and then a couch hurling at me from top of a building and being pushed out of the way and that's it.” You feel Sebastian squeeze your hand and you see him bow his head and start to cry. You are so confused as to why he is even here and also crying after what you had told the doctor. “Well y/n after that happened you went unconscious. It was Mr Stan here that saved you from that piece of furniture. He brought you to the hospital himself, and well Sebastian, do you want to take it from here?” “Would it be possible to speak to y/n in private?” “Yes of course let me just give her a quick check up and we will leave you alone.” The whole time the doctor is examining you Sebastian is not letting go of your hand. Very shortly he finishes and heads out of the room with the nurse. But before she leaves she gives Sebastian a once over with a small smile on her lips. You feel something in your heart like jealousy but you see Sebastain not even give the nurse the time of day. That was very strange for you to feel something like that for someone you hardly know.

“Um before I start, swe.. I mean y/n this is my friend and assistant Ethan, he knows about this whole thing i’m about to tell you.” “Hi y/n, i just want to tell you that i'm glad you are better now and I hope to see you soon.” With that he leaves the room. Sebastian is stroking your hand with his thumb looking like he is trying to find the courage to tell you what has been happening. He exhales deeply and starts to tell you everything that has happened in the last almost 2 weeks. Everything from you thinking you have been dating each other for 2 years to your lazy days together at his apartment and well to the inevitable, him proposing marriage to you 2 days ago. That's when you look at your left hand that he has been holding and you see the small but beautiful engagement ring. “I really had hoped that you would at least remember some of our time together when you got your memory back but judging by your reaction i don't think that happened.” With a sad and disappointed look on his face, he tries to be strong but fails.

“Sebastian, this all sounds so crazy I don't know what to say. Can you let me think about this for a little bit? This is all so overwhelming and I just need a few minutes to process this." With a nod of his head and a small kiss to your hand he walks over to the door and begins to exit the room, but before he leaves he looks over his shoulder to you and gives you a sweet smile. “I'm going to go get something to drink and if you need anything I will be just outside this door, okay?” Then he is out of the room and walking down the hall to get some water and clear his mind.

He really hoped you remembered him but he was expecting this so all he can do is sit and wait for you to call him. It has only been 30 mins but all of a sudden you hear the door open and see Sebastian enter the room. “I’m so sorry but I forgot my wallet.” You see the forlorn look on his face and he looks like he’s about to cry again just seeing you. “Oh Angel Eyes, please don't cry.” When Sebastain hears the pet name you gave him his heart beat picks up and his eyes get wide. If you just called him angel eyes then somewhere in your mind you remember. “What did you just say? Did you just call me angel eyes?” “I’m so sorry i don't know where that came from.”

“Sweetheart, I need you to think back okay? Do you remember the post-it note?” Y/N looks away from Sebastain to try and search her mind. It takes her a good minute but all of a sudden she gets a quick flash of something in her mind. It's blurry but she can see 2 people laying in bed, the man has his head laying on the woman's shoulder and she has a pen in her hand. She shakes her head and all of a sudden she is seeing the memory from her own eyes. Sebastian is looking at her with anticipation not wanting to interrupt her. Y/n head snaps up and she is looking at Sebastian with tears in her eyes. She lets out a shaky breath taking in his gray-blue eyes like it was the first time.

“I remember, we were laying in your bed and..and I wanted to ease your fears of me ever leaving you so i wrote you something on a post-it note.” At that moment Sebastain takes out his phone and shows her a picture of the note above the bed. Both of them are now crying not knowing where to go from here. “I know this sounds really crazy but I have never felt this deeply for someone in my entire life. I may have only known you for 2 weeks but I am madly in love with you. Look at your hand I proposed to you 2 days ago. That's how much I love you. I may not know much about your actual life but I would give anything to keep you in my life so I can know everything about you. I'm sorry if I'm overwhelming you but sweetheart, remember what you wrote on that note baby and we sealed it with a kiss.” You both don't realize how close to each other you are until you feel his lips on yours. The kiss is so soft and tender, like you're made of glass. He brings his hand up around to the back of your head to deepen the kiss. By now Sebastian has stood up and is climbing into the hospital bed never breaking the kiss. Your head is so dizzy from the memories coming back to and the kiss combined. You finally break the kiss to catch your breath.

“I remember everything, Sebastian. But, how is this going to work our relationship? I know I'm not a thin model or someone that you typically date but I don't want to be attacked because I don't fit everyone's beauty standards…” Sebastian cuts off your rant by placing his finger on your lips. “We will get through this, I know it may get hard but I will do everything in my power to make sure we can make this work. I don't care what anyone else has to say about us. All that matters is that we love each other and will be there for one another. Will you give this a chance, give us a chance?” You stroke his cheek and he leans into your touch. “I will give us a chance Sebastian, if you promise me two things?”

“What is it? I’ll do anything?” With a big smile on your face you tell him…. “I need to go back to my hometown and retrieve a few family items that i left there.” “Okay that's no problem, what the other thing baby?” “Can we get a dog?” With a hearty laugh Sebastian kisses you senseless and promises you anything you want. “Wait, do you still want to marry me? You haven't changed your mind on that have you?” Looking into his eyes, seeing the emotion deep in them waiting for your answer. “Well, I always dreamed of having my wedding ceremony in Strawberry Fields in the fall, think we can swing that?” “Baby, I will give you the world.”

Sebastian lays in the bed with you just holding you as you comb your hands through his hair. An hour later Dr Roberts comes back into the room to check up on you. “Well I gather things went very well?” “Yes doctor, thank you so much for the great care you have given me. When can I go home?” “I don't see a harm in discharging you this evening. But I want you to come see me in two weeks for a follow up to make sure the swelling has stayed down.” “Of course doctor, I will make sure she sets that up as soon as possible.”

Ethan comes back into the room with a few coffee’s and snacks. Sebastian lets him know everything that has happened since he was gone and formally introduces himself and tells you it was him that packed all your belongings from your hotel weeks prior. The three of you end up talking until the nurse comes back in with your discharge papers. As you are signing the papers you see out of your peripheral vision that she is eyeing Sebastian like she wants to tear his clothes off. So you place the papers on your lap and look at the nurse to speak.

“Excuse me ma’am but would mind not eye fucking my fiance’ in front of me i would really appreciate that. Also it's very unprofessional and I wouldn't want to have to talk to your supervisor or Dr Roberts about this.” The nurse looks at you with wide eyes then down at the floor in shame mumbling a sorry under breath. Sebastian makes it a point to show the nurse who he belongs to when he comes to the side of the bed and kisses you deeply. “What was that for?” “Just wanted to make sure that nurse knew I was yours and yours only.” You pass off the papers to the nurse and start getting dressed to leave the hospital. As Sebastian, Ethan and yourself exit the emergency room you notice a very familiar black suv. Rounding the front of the car you see a familiar face. “Hi Marcus how have you been?” “I’ve been very well Miss, I hope you are feeling better?” Marcus opens the back door to let you in. You slide into the seat and see Sebastian just staring at you with so much love in his eyes. “Come on angel eyes, let's go home.” With your request he jumps into the back seat with you and holds you the entire way back home.

Taking a chance in life and finally taking that trip to New York changed your life forever and you couldn't be happier.

Tag List: @christycurlswrites @povlvr @buckyalpine @frostironfudge @peaches1958 @altagraye

#sebastian stan x plus sized reader #sebastian stan x curvy reader #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x female reader #sebastian stan smut #sebastian stan x y/n #sebastian stan fandom #sebastian stan daddy #sebastian stan

232 notes · View notes

campbyler · 7 months

Note

hii , just wanted to say how much i litterally love this fic, ngl it has turned me into a swiftie (bow down to taylor swift) anyways i wanted to ask what is the partys fav eras?

every time someone says they became a taylor fan bc of this fic we grow more powerful >:) so glad to hear! welcome to the brainrot 🫡 as for their favs, we talked abt their fav albums a while back but that was a While Back and i never deny an opportunity to talk acswy party x taylor so here are what we think their favs would be:

el: speak now stan first and human being second. she’s just like me <3 no notes here her taste is immaculate. she did in fact shell out for the merch earlier this summer

max: rep girly through and through (both the album and the vibes of the Era) but i think she holds a very soft spot for lover (specifically after she and lucas start dating). loves call it what you want bc she is a not so secret softie

lucas: lover! not a huge fan but got introduced to taylor more through max and naturally gravitated towards lover. i’ve said this before and i’ve said this again but his fav track off of it is def i think he knows. he got my heart! beat! skipping down 16th avenue! etc so on and so forth

dustin: not a huge taylor Fan for the most part. likes her more popular hits and therefore probably 1989 if he had to pick an album. however he can also be found listening to very random debut tracks that no one else in the party ever really listens to. his spotify listening activity will show him listening to cold as you for three hours and everyone thinks it’s a glitch (it’s not). also a should’ve said no enjoyer. he and el scream it in the car a lot

will: tells everyone it’s folklore for the lyricism and whatnot (it’s mostly true) but he holds a special spot for red tv that he conveniently does not mention (specifically the breakup songs) (#andyoucallmeupagainjusttobreakmelikeapromise). mostly bc of the timing of when it dropped but also bc red tv is a masterpiece and he is putting some well deserved respect on its name. el and max know his secret though bc they had to listen to him listening to it on loop for nov-december 2021 and then it carried over into jan 2022 before they finally staged an intervention

mike: if he had to choose an Album it would prob be evermore but i think his favorite songs are scattered throughout the rest of her discography! to meeeee he is a mine enjoyer, as well as delicate, hygtg, so on and so forth. is not allowed to listen to this is me trying anymore for his own safety (lucas keeps tabs on his spotify activity). also to me mike is a pop punk enjoyer so i think speak now’s sound really draws him in as well! definitely got excited over fob + hayley’s features on the vault tracks

#to me will is fearless coded in every universe #i don’t think it would be acswy will’s fav album tho #like i don’t think he’d listen to most of the songs on it a lotttttt. here n there yea #probably some commentary here i’ll come back to add later hehe #asks #acswy reference

59 notes · View notes

totallysora · 2 months

Text

West Side Story (2021)

I HAVE SM TO SAY ABT THIS MOVIE IT’S UNREAL 😭 Ok so I finally decided to watch it for the first time in like,,early January and it has actually changed me 😭 IT WAS SO GOOD?? LIKE THE CASTING WAS JUST MWAH I LOVED IT SM 😕 Anyways here are some of the things (from what I can remember, I haven’t actually had time to rewatch it since 😔) that I loved about it!

MAJOR SPOILER WARNING!!

The jets were amazing, fight me

Ik that’s kinda controversial cuz they’re horrible people, and yes I absolutely get that, and do not support their actions at all (If ur a jets apologist pls leave 🥰) but GOD THE CASTING?? UGH IT WAS JUST SO PERFECT 😭 All of their songs were literally so good?? The Jet song is unfairly catchy, and Gee, Officer Krupke?? It was actually magical (THIS IS WHY WE CAST BWAY ACTORS IN MUSICAL MOVIES PEOPLE 😻‼️)

That scene with Anita?? It honestly made my blood boil, which is actually like,,the best thing ever?? Ik that sounds horrible but I mean it in a way that if a scene is meant to make you feel disgusted, or completely angry, and it succeeds?? That’s how u know it was good acting

On the topic of the Jets, MIKE FAIST?? UM HELLO WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK HE WAS PERFECT CASTING IT’S UNREAL

I struggle to differentiate between actors and characters, so the whole rumble scene was a lil bit of a mess for me at first cuz I adore Mike sm, however when I thought abt it more, and how Riff acted, I was able to think of him as Riff, not Mike, and realised holy shit yea he actually kinda deserved what happened to him yk

THE RUMBLE OML 😭 THE ACTING WAS JUST SO UGH I LOVED IT SM - Unliked in the 1961 version (which I haven’t actually watched but have seen clips of!) you could actually tell it was like,,serious yk?? And when Riff got stabbed?? Holy fuck the emotion in that scene was unreal

Also the way David and Ansel acted straight after it happened?? I kinda got a ‘I didn’t actually want to kill him’ kinda feel from Bernardo, and honestly I kinda felt for him man 😭

I love the way that this rlly showed why Tony was the leader of the Jets, the way he beats Bernardos ass?? You can see why he led such a strong gang

Completely unrelated but the fact that this whole thing was basically a newsies reunion 💀

like Mike, Kyle, Jess, BEN? GARRETT?? THE TWINS???

I will forever adore the casting tho like honestly it was so good

Also the Sharks were robbed of screen time Icl 😭 They deffo should’ve been on screen more man

RACHEL MF ZEGLER 😻‼️ The fact that this was her debut will literally never not shock me

Like this girl was 17 and could sing like that?? No wonder ppl love her sm like damn 😭

People can actually fight me on this but Ansel was such good casting for Tony

I’ve seen people bash him for it but he was literally so good?? Like sorry but I refuse to accept anyone else (obviously excluding bway lmao)

On the topic of Tony the ending actually made me cry?? Like I was fine untik they picked him up and started carrying him after he got shot 😭

Icl halfway through the movie I googled if anyone died so I was prepared for it to happen but doesn’t mesn I didn’t still cry 😕

ARIANA DEBOSE 😻‼️ HER ANITA WAS SO PERFECT OML 😭 LITERALLY NO ONE CAN BEAT HER SHE WAS SO GOOD ITS UNREAL

ALSO DAVID‼️ I FEEL LIKE PEOPLE DONT FOCUS ON HIM ENOUGH LIKE CMON HE WAS SO GOOD??

RITA MONERO 🥰 She was in the og movie and I am so glad they got her back cuz she was a m a z i n g

Also the fact that she sung her song live?? Cmon man she’s so good

Ok so Josh Rivera 😻 Although I didn’t rlly like Chino at first he definitely grew on me the more I thought about it - Ik killing Tony could be considered extreme, but realistically?? I totally get where he came from, it was an incredibly difficult situation, and I can understand why he did what he did

THE CHOREOGRAPHY ‼️‼️ LITERALLY WHO CHOREOGRAPHED THIS MOVIE IT WAS SO GOOD?? THE WHOLE THING WAS FILLED WITH AMAZING CHOREOGRAPHY AND IT WAS JUST SO 😫 If I could marry that choreography I would

Ok but the singing in general?? Like Ik they wouldn’t cast bad singers but be fr literally all of the songs slap

Ik I’ve said it before but I will say it as many times as I need to THIS IS WHY WE CAST BWAY (OR THEATRE) ACTORS IN MUSICAL MOVIES 👏👏

The soundtrack is actually so good tho like I pretty much wouldn’t skip any of it

Ok completely random but I couldn’t understand half of the movie 💀 cuz they spoke spanish and although I had subtitles on it just gave me the spanish in spanish subtitles, so half of the time I was guessing or just hoping I’ll get what’s going on 😭

If u couldn’t tell I cannot speak spanish (and tbh I’m not doing that well in it at school so 😔)

There is so so so much more I can say about this movie, and once I’ve posted this I will definitely plan a part 2 specifically focusing on the songs, and a part 3 on characters (possibly in the opposite order tho) because this movie was a m a z i n g and I could actually talk about it for h o u r s

26 notes · View notes

beautifulpersonpeach · 1 year

Text

I hope that by now, after Hobi’s collaboration with J. Cole, Joon’s El Pais interview, and now Jimin’s Set Me Free Pt. 2, it’s obvious a lot of the criticism around BTS, much of what counts for ‘discourse’, is completely pointless.

Something I noticed after BTS released Fake Love in 2018, is that ‘Discourse’ around the mediums they choose to make music, the kind of music they put out, and how they communicate their ideas, all frankly just boils down to people dissatisfied that BTS didn’t express an idea the exact way those people would prefer, at exactly the time they’d prefer it. That’s it. It’s not a criticism that tackles the substance of their ideas or elevates the conversation around BTS, but one about personal preferences that people with inflated egos courtesy of the internet, mistake to be synonymous with meaningful appraisals of their skill, competency, and their characters.

BTS has always made music in a variety of styles and they’ve shown they’re more than capable of making some of the best hard-hitting and unconventional music there is, not just in Korea, but globally. But then they release a handful of pop tunes that while not my favourite, generated a whole multitude of k-pop stans circle-jerking to ‘discourse’ about how ‘BTS has lost their roots’ when all those people are actually saying is that “BTS didn’t make the exact sort of music I prefer or say something exactly the way I prefer, this time around, on my schedule.”

Take for example discourse around Joon’s latest interview:

Joon has shown similar candour as in the El Pais interview, in their 2022 Weverse interview, in their 2021 Billboard interview, and in honestly more Vlives and interviews than I can count. The primary difference between the El Pais interview and the others is in the sort of questions asked by interviewer/publication. That is what was refreshing because Western media outlets often do not take their music seriously enough to not venture beyond the obligatory ‘dark side of k-pop’ asks before grilling BTS on their potential romantic partners. The interviewer in El Pais was notably more informed about BTS and Namjoon in particular, and that carried through in the interview. Joon is older, more mature, and more comfortable (especially now that they’ve announced their intentions to enlist), but if you were paying attention, you’d realize he’s said a lot of what he said in that interview, long before. He’s not significantly more eloquent and more candid than he was a year ago, he simply responded to the interviewer based on the questions posed and the tone used.

Another example is in Jimin’s latest release, SMF Pt 2, which brought to mind criticism of Jimin I’ve seen from solos, multis, antis and general k-pop stans every fortnight or so, for the last eight years. We can all see references in the lyrics, in the choreography, in the stylistic musical choices, in the medium: rap vs vocals, to many BTS songs and even Jimin’s solo work put out long before. In SMF Pt 2:

For lyrics and message, Jimin references narratives expressed in Lie, Promise, ON, among others;

For sonic expression, Jimin references Friends and ON, seen in his preference for choral effects; Tony Montana and Black Swan for autotune as a tool and rap music as a medium;

For dance/choreography, Jimin references Butterfly, Lie, and ON.

Set Me Free Pt 2 is a combination of various expressions we’ve already seen Jimin do, sharpened to the extreme to drive home the point that this is his time and everyone should get the fuck out of his way.

It’s effective.

Like JITB and Indigo before now, I’m already seeing people lament that Jimin is talking about how their fame affects him, the reference to his haters, or that he is too proud and egotistical. And some Anons are already starting to fret about it in my inbox. I don’t know what to tell y’all besides that I don’t care. I’m not sure how many times I can show that none of those people know what they’re talking about. I’m not confident enough to express how little I think about some random’s opinion about music and how I listen to it, without rudely telling them off in two syllables.

All I’ve got to say about the discourse around this song is ‘fuck off.’

I’m enjoying myself too much. I’m loving Jimin’s vocals and self expression too much. I’m too happy to give a flying fuck what anyone else thinks on the matter.

Aside, Jimin has inspired some of the best fanart I’ve seen in ages:

Credit: @/5813_99

Credit: @/5duelle

Credit: @/0901mg_

Credit: @/glassrtz

Credit: @/emmysuga

#Jimin #park jimin #set me free pt.2 #Jimin FACE #BTS #kpop #fandom discourse

156 notes · View notes

pinchofhoney · 1 year

Note

Hi!! How are you doing? I wanted to send in a request for your celebration, please!! But first, congratulations for this milestone!! Ot's amazing!! 🥳 I would like to make a fluffy request for Ben Barnes with prompt n°2 in the fluff list (the one with the playlist). I don't have a plot or anything of the kind, but as we know how important music is for Ben, and that he often makes playlists (for his roles for example), I thought it would suit him. I hope you feel inspired by this idea. I hope you have a nice day, and congratulations again!!! 💕

if only my heart had a voice # 200 follower special event

» prompt event » special events masterlist

fluff prompt two: “make me a playlist sometime, will you?”

credits to ben barnes and his 2021 instagram story

ben barnes x reader

word count: 1.5k

warning: none, just another fluff, no use of y/n

summary: Music has the power to tap into our memories and stir up deep-seated emotions. And the beauty of it is that each time we hear a song, it can bring back those same memories and feelings as vividly as the first time we experienced them.

a/n: hello<33 i'm great, thank you! i hope you're doing great too and the upcoming weekend will be the good one!! thank you for your request, i hope you will be satisfied enough with what i have prepared and that the level of sweetness is just right for a fluff queen<3 and if not, i hope the video i found will melt your heart so much that what i wrote will no longer matter

pages that may interest you: masterlist ♡ taglist ♡ who i write for

taglist: @wolfmoonmusic @myladydarkling @alexxavicry

The chilly evening had settled in, with the frosty breath of winter creeping in through every nook and cranny of the cozy house. You sat perched on the soft leather stool at your boyfriend's grand piano, your fingers tentatively hovering over the ivory keys. You were wrapped in a fluffy, knitted blanket that had been lovingly crafted by your mother, with its comforting weight enveloping you with warmth.

The fire in the nearby hearth crackled and sputtered, throwing sparks and shadows onto the walls of the room. The flickering flames illuminated the piano in a warm and inviting glow, casting dancing shadows across the polished wood of the instrument.

The room was filled with a plenty of comforting details. Starting with soft and cozy throw rug, which was spread out in front of the fireplace, inviting you to curl up on it and bask in the warmth of the fire, a nearby shelf stacked with an assortment of books and ending with a collection of photographs from your travels with Ben, adorning the walls with captured cherishing memories and moments frozen in time.

But your attention was focused on the piano, and the notes that Ben had taught you the previous night. With a deep breath, you began to play, trying not to make any mistakes and the sound of the piano filled the room and bring a sense of comfort and peace.

The keys felt cool and smooth beneath your fingertips, the weight of each note echoing through the room. Unfortunately, you weren't as skilled at playing the piano as you had hoped to be. Every now and then, your fingers would stumble over the keys, causing you to furrow your brow in frustration. Your perfectionist nature demanded immediate success, but the intricacies of the music proved to be a challenge, especially for a person like you who had never really been in touch with the piano.

You let out a defeated sigh, feeling overwhelmed and discouraged. But just as you were about to give up, you heard the sound of Ben's footsteps approaching. He entered the living room, carrying two steaming mugs of hot chocolate, the rich aroma of cocoa and marshmallows filling the air.

“Hey there,” he said with a warm smile, placing the mugs on a small table nearby. He sat down next to you, wrapping his arm around your shoulders and pulling you close. “How's the practicing going?”

You couldn't help but let out a small chuckle, shaking your head in mild embarrassment. “Don't act as if you haven't heard that sound of failure,” you said, feeling a sense of comfort as you leaned into his embrace.

Ben responded with a soft laughter, his arms tightening around you. “Don't be so hard on yourself, love,” he reassured you. “Learning to play an instrument takes time and practice. You're doing great, and you'll get there.”

You let out a deep sigh, feeling a sense of impatience with your progress. “But I want to be there now,” you muttered, poking out your lower lip in frustration.

“Has anyone ever told you before that you're impatient?” he laughed, his eyes sparkling with amusement. “You've only been playing for a week, my dear. Give yourself some time.”

You couldn't help but smile at his teasing tone, feeling a sense of warmth spread through your body. Ben always had a way of making you feel better, even when you were feeling frustrated or down.

“Maybe I would have been better at it if my teacher wasn't so distracting,” you teased playfully, poking his side.

“Excuse me?” Ben's eyes widened in mock surprise. “Now it's my fault?” he asked in a playful tone, his lips curling up into a smile.

A sense of warmth enveloped you as you lifted your head to kiss Ben's jawbone, which was easily within reach from the way you were seated. There was something about being with him that made even the simplest of moments feel special. It was as if the world around you melted away, leaving just the two of you in a warm, cozy bubble.

After a peaceful moment of silence, with only the sounds of the fireplace crackling in the background, Ben asked with a smile, “Would you like to hear me play something?”

“Anything you like,” you replied, feeling the tender weight of his kiss on your head before he moved his hand away to make him more comfortable to play.

You scooted back a bit, tucking the blanket more tightly around you as though the room had suddenly grown colder without his closeness.

“Well?” Ben prompted, fingers poised above the keys.

You shrugged, unable to hide the grin on your face. You knew that anything he played would sound beautiful to you, and you savored each and every note that he brought to life on the piano. “Maybe something that reminds you of?”

Ben's eyes crinkled at the corners as he considered your request, his fingers dancing over the keys. Slowly, a familiar melody filled the room, and you couldn't help but close your eyes and let the music wash over you. It was the same song that had been playing on the radio during your first date, and the memories it brought back made you smile.

The notes seemed to transport you to another world, easing your worries and soothing your soul. The warmth of the room, the soft embrace of the blanket, and the gentle light from the flickering hearth cocooned you in a peaceful bubble.

After a moment, you opened your eyes and looked over at Ben. His eyes were closed, and he was completely lost in the music. The way his fingers moved effortlessly over the keys created a beautiful symphony, and you couldn't help but feel a deep sense of admiration and love for him. You noticed the way the firelight danced across his face, highlighting the features that you loved so much, and you felt grateful to be sharing this moment with him. There was no place you wanted to be more than here. With Ben.

As the melody came to an end, you let out a soft sigh, feeling as if you had just woken up from a beautiful dream. You looked back at Ben and saw that he was looking at you, his eyes filled with love and tenderness. “I love you,” you said what the first thing that popped into your head.

A small smile formed on Ben's lips as he heard your words. He reached out and took your hand in his, squeezing it gently. “I love you too, more than anything in this world,” he said softly, his eyes never leaving yours. You leaned in to give him a soft kiss, feeling more in love with him than ever before. As you snuggled up to him again, you felt a deep sense of joy, knowing that you were the luckiest woman in the world to have him in your life.

As you settled back into the cozy atmosphere, you thought of something that had been on your mind for a while. “Hey, make me a playlist sometime, will you?” you asked, looking up at Ben.

He looked a bit confused, as if he didn't understand why you were asking this all of a sudden. “A playlist?” he repeated.

You nodded, a small smile playing on your lips. “Yeah, I don't know why you haven't done it yet. I’d love to have the songs that you associate with me. With us. I think it would be nice to always have them with me.”

A smile spread across Ben's face as he understood your request. “Of course, love,” he said, leaning in to give you a loving kiss on the forehead. “I'll make you the most special playlist you've ever heard.”

You snuggled into him even more, feeling his warmth enveloping you. “You know, there are some songs that always remind me of you,” he said, his voice low and soothing. “Like the one we danced to in my trailer when you visited me on the set,” he chuckled as he recollected the moment. “Or that one we listened to on our picnic date while watching the sunset.”

You smiled at the memories that flooded your mind. “Yes, I remember,” you replied, feeling a sense of nostalgia mixed with happiness.

Ben reached for his phone and began scrolling through his music library. “Let's start with this one,” he said, pressing play on a song that you had never heard before. The music that filled the room stirred up emotions within you, and though you didn't recognize the song, it felt as if it was crafted for you and Ben alone. As you listened, you couldn't help but wonder about the other songs that Ben associated with your relationship, those that held a special place in his heart and reminded him of you every time he heard them.

As the night went on, Ben played song after song, each one more beautiful and meaningful than the last. And as you listened, you knew that this playlist would always hold a special place in your heart, a reminder of the love and happiness that you shared with the most important person in your life.

#pinchofhoney's special events #200 followers #200 follower special #200 follower celebration #ben barnes #ben barnes fanfic #ben barnes fanfiction #ben barnes x reader #ben barnes x you #no use of y/n #ben barnes imagine #ben barnes one shot #ben barnes prompt #ben barnes fluff #fluff #fluff prompt #shadow and bone #shadow and bone netflix #shadow and bone fanfiction

108 notes · View notes

canesshuga · 2 years

Photo

SONGS THAT CARRIED ME THROUGH 2021 (44/60)

St. Vincent - The Melting Of The Sun

#non ga #st vincent #blogmusicdaily #dailymusicians #dailymusicqueens #dailywomen #dailylgbtq #musicedit #usermusic #annie clark #the melting ot the sun #daddys home #songs that carried me through 2021 #chat's gifs #another case of: the mv is rly weird and freaky so lets gif the live performance instead #i linked the mv in the caption and put the live performance link in the source

459 notes · View notes

allthecanadianpolitics · 7 months

Text

Not long before Kaylyn Baker was named the winner of the 2023 Yukon Prize for Visual Arts, the Whitehorse-based artist was sitting in the Yukon Arts Centre parking lot, blasting her car stereo as loud as it would go.

Her song of choice: More Than Love by Trevor Hall. "I was just letting the music pump through me," says Baker, 34. In that moment, she needed something that would completely shake up her headspace — a song that would carry her into the auditorium with confidence.

"I felt really, really nervous," says Baker, thinking back to that night in September. She couldn't believe that she'd made it this far.

Boasting a purse of $20,000, the Yukon Prize celebrates the top artists in the territory, a region of Canada with a superlative number of creatives per capita. It's still a relatively new competition; the prize, which is awarded every other year, named its first winner in 2021 (Joseph Tisiga), and it aims to support artists from the region while connecting the Yukon arts community with the art world beyond its borders.

According to the organizers, 64 artists applied for the 2023 competition, and from that pool, Baker was selected by the jury for the finals, joining fellow shortlisters Jeffrey Langille, Rebekah Miller, Cole Pauls, Omar Reyna and Alainnah Whachell. [...]

Tagging: @politicsofcanada

#cdnpoli #Yukon #Indigenous art #Whitehorse #Tutchone #Tlingit

52 notes · View notes

hierarchyproblem · 4 months

Text

Big dumb album of the year post, here we fucking go:

Punk

A lot of the punk releases that crossed my radar this year were really hardcore-y hardcore or weak-ass "indie punk" shit, and that doesn't do a lot for me. And like, who cares if Rancid are still making music? Does Tim Armstrong even need any more money at this point?

This year I liked All Together Now from Cop/Out and All Riot from Angry Youth Elite. GEL's Only Constant sadly wasn't a patch on 2021's Violent Closure (though I did get to see them live and they put on a hell of a show), and I look forward to seeing Killing Daisies develop their sound following a pretty strong debut with Break the Silence. The HIRS Collective are at their best at their grindiest IMO, but I still liked lots of We're Still Here. Slutbomb's EP Commodified Identity is exactly what I want punk to sound like, but this year's winner is Dog Park Dissidents with their debut The Pink and Black Album.

I've talked before about my frustration with the state of queer punk at the minute, which largely seems to consist of didactic lyricism, indie-pop influences, and the basics of liberal feminism presented as radical politics. Not so with Dog Park Dissidents: their lyrics are frequently funny and occasionally surprisingly emotive, their political content is incisive, and while we're not talking face-melting blast-beats here, the songs are genuinely entertaining. Half of the songs on this album have more to say than the entire discographies of some punk bands, and are pretty catchy too.

Favourite tracks: Rainbow Drones, Host, Class Struggle

Grindcore

I haven't listened to much new grind this year; I don't know what releases have even happened. There must be some good stuff that passed me by - let me know what I missed!

The Full of Hell collaborations weren't really my thing, but Haggus' EP What's Your Excuse was great as ever. Sometimes trawling bandcamp you can strike gold such as Coming Apart from Tolerances Of The Human Face In Crash Impacts or Human Decay from Rancid Stench. There was only ever gonna be one winner this year, however, and it's Gridlink's Coronet Juniper.

What can I even say about this? Gridlink have done it again. Somehow, even after guitarist Takafumi Matsubara's stroke in 2014, they've managed another album that's almost as perfect as Longhena. Their "technical grindcore" sound is unique and electrifying; Gridlink are untouchable. Nobody sounds like them. I'm blown away.

Favourite tracks: Silk Ash Cascade, Anhalter Bahnhof, Octave Serpent

Black Metal

It's been a fucking good year for black metal.

Between Panopticon's The Rime of Memory, Underdark's Managed Decline, Blackbraid's Blackbraid II, and Trespasser's Αποκάλυψισ, there's been plenty of excellent releases to keep me busy (can you tell I got into this through RABM?). I thought the production felt a little thin on the final Dawn Ray'd album, To Know the Light - the lack of a bassist hurt here, more than on any prior release - but I had the good fortune to be at the album release show, and it was the best gig of my entire fucking life, so this album holds a special place for me. Sad to see these guys go.

Fadheit's EP Afterglow deserves a special shout-out for carrying the torch of Lifelover's brand of depressive black metal, a sound I'll never get enough of. Probably everyone's black metal album of the year is going to be Saturnian Bloodstorm by Lamp of Murmuur, and that's well-deserved. This is possibly the best Lamp release yet, and I'm very into the freezing Immortal-esque guitar tone on this one. I'll be going back to Saturnian Bloodstorm for a long time, but the album I've actually enjoyed the most this year is Immortal themselves, with War Against All.

It's a rare enough thing for a band to keep releasing quality music for thirty years - even Darkthrone have had their misses - but Immortal are still going strong. You could be forgiven for phoning it in at this point, but I don't get that impression: as much as black metal can be "fun," I feel like Demonaz is still having fun, and I had a lot of fun with this album too. If you like black metal, there's plenty to like here.

Favourite tracks: No Sun, Return to Cold, Wargod

Ska

Ska is going from strength to strength right now; the past few years have been some of the genre's best in a long long time. This year I was delighted to see Mustard Plug releasing music again with the excellent Where Did All My Friends Go? and I enjoyed a lot of Poindexter's upbeat ska-pop debut album Treats. I scratched my ska-punk itch with Public Serpent's caustic The Bully Puppet and HEY-SMITH's frantic Rest in Punk. Popes of Chillitown's latest Take a Picture has something for everyone, drawing from about a hundred genre influences.

Still, my favourite ska album of this year is Plastic Presidents' debut Good Times Can't Last.

Please, please, do yourself a favour and listen to that opening track. This is one hell of an attention-grabbing debut, without a single skip on the tracklist, covering dancey 2-tone-era ska-punk through to aggressive skacore. If this was the only album they ever released, they'd have earned a spot in my pantheon: I'll be following eagerly to see what they do next.

Favourite tracks: Chains, West Omaha is a Terrible Place and I'm Definitely Afraid to Die, Break Free

Other

This "category" is one hell of a grab bag, but I don't know where else to put Tomb Mold, one of the only death metal bands I unreservedly love. Their most recent release The Enduring Spirit is sure to end up on a lot of album of the year lists.

The Nearly Deads' We Are the Nearly Deads is pretty much what I want rock to be (that is, completely without trace of any fucking metalcore influences!). I have a soft spot for symphonic metal, and Chapter III - Downfall from Ad Infinitum hit that spot this year. Finally, while I preferred Brave Murder Day-era Katatonia, I still like the goth rock thing they've been doing basically ever since then, and Sky Void of Stars is one of their better albums in that vein.

My left-field pick for Album of the Year, however, is Shit Present's What Still Gets Me.

I usually can't stand the kind of thing that's just punk-adjacent enough for the algorithms to insist on trying to force it into my ears. I didn't expect to like this, either - but it's really, really good. Like, I should hate anything you can describe as "emo-pop," but I don't, here. I love it. The songs are so well-crafted, the vocals so perfectly-delivered; there's an energy and emotion to this album that's had me listening to it on repeat since May.

Check it out: it's the best album of 2023.

Favourite tracks: Voice in Your Head, More to Lose, Cram the Page

#aoty

24 notes · View notes

edutainer2022 · 6 months

Text

@lenfantdeverone , @idontknowreallywhy, @janetm74 I don't think Spotify is available in my country, so I did it longhand - just went through my mp3 playlist, trawling for everything that is "Scott" in my head (themes, lyrics, vibes, something he would like, something that goes along with some headcanons or Scott fics I read) - there's no system, but there IS a rather recognizable pattern, I guess:

Nothing_Breaks_Like_a_Heart_(Mark Ronson)

Imagine Dragons - Believer

paul_mccartney_-_hope_of_deliverance

P!nk - Try

kate-bush-Running-up-that-hill

one republic-I-aint-worried

Nickelback - Million Miles An Hour

Nickelback - If Today Was Your Last Day

Daniel Powter - Bad Day

Sky Full of Song (Florence & The Machine)

disturbed-The-sound-of-silence

How You Remind Me (Nickleback)

Nickelback_-_Far_Away

The Darkness - I believe in a thing called love

Metallica - Unforgiven

lp-Lost-on-you

Taylor Swift - Red (Taylor's Version) (2021)

taylor-swift-Anti-hero

shania-twain-I'm-gonna-getcha-good

Sinead_OConnor_-_Nothing_Compares_2_U

AC-DC - Thunderstruck

Kenny_Loggins_-_Danger_Zone

lady-gaga-Hold-my-hand

Hold_back_the_river_-_james_bay

bonnie-tyler-total-eclipse-of-the-heart + I need a hero

Carole King - Where You Lead

Nickelback — Trying Not To Love You

Nickelback — When We Stand Together

Nickelback_-_If_Everyone_Cared

Imagine Dragons - Thunder

The Weeknd — Blinding Lights

Harold Faltermeyer — Top Gun Anthem (Film Version)

the-smiths-How-soon-is-now

Joan_Osborne_-_One_Of_Us

Scorpions - Rock You Like a Hurricane

Bryan Adams – You Can't Take Me I'm Free

Bryan Adams – Brothers Under The Sun

Bryan Adams – Here I Am

Bryan Adams feat. Sting, Rod Stewart – All For Love (From The Three Musketeers)

maria_burmaka_- Той, той, хто зі мною/ The one with me

Fleur — Сегодня / Today

Bon Jovi – Have A Nice Day

Bon Jovi – You Give Love A Bad Name

Kansas - Carry on My Wayward Son

Green Day - Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Electric Light Orchestra - Mr. Blue Sky

Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell - Ain't No Mountain High Enough

Lyra-Falling

a-great-big-world-Say Something, I'm Giving Up on You

tom-odell-Another-love

the_pierces_-_three_wishes

Timbaland – Its too late to apologize

Simon & Garfunkel – Sound of Silence (Hello darkness, my old friend)

skillet_-_awake_and_alive

skillet-monster

Tailor Swift – I knew you were trouble

nightwish_-I_wish_i_had_an_angel

Rachel Platten – Stand By You

Shakira – Underheath your clothes

Mans Zelmerlow - Heroes

melnica_- Господин горных дорог/Lord of Mountain Roads

nickelback_-_Hero

nickelback_-_Savin'_me

Nightwish – End Of All Hope

green_day_-_Wake_me_up_when_september_ends

sekret_ Безпечный ездок/Reckless Rider

Bravo - Это за окном рассвет/ It's the dawn in the window

ChaiF - Поплачь о нём, пока он живой / Mourn him till he's alive

Keha – Die Young

kancler_gi - Брат мой, брат/ Brother mine, brother

eric_clapton_-_Blue_eyes_blue

fleur_- Расскажи мне о своей катастрофе/Tell me of your catastrophe

gary_jules_-Mad_world

Demi Livato - Give-your-heart-a-break

Lullaby (Hunger Games)

David_Guetta_feat._Sia_-_Titanium

bon_jovi_-_It's_my_life

30seconds to Mars – The Kill

The Feeling - Love It When You Call

a-ha_-_Crying_in_the_rain

Age of Information - Shattered (And-I've-lost-who-I-am)

avicii_Hey_brother

kantsler_gi- Вы ненавидите меня так страстно/ You hate me so passionately

phillip_phillips_Gone_gone_gone

Suzanne_vega_Solitude_standing

Queen- Show must go on

florence_the_machine_Seven_devils

imagine_dragons_Demons

#methinks i have astronomy #thunderbirds are go #scott tracy #scott tracy playlist #scott tracy needs a hug #now is a good time to remind i'm ukrainian-russian bilingual #i left songs in other four or five languages out

27 notes · View notes

chcrryade · 2 months

Text

when you think you know what i know.

Hasun, and all of the people he has to learn how to understand.

INCLUDES ⁺⠀lee hasun, cherryade ensemble. TIMESTAMP ⁺⠀JULY—NOVEMBER 2021. WARNINGS ⁺⠀profanity, injury, smoking, arguing. the piece as a whole is kind of a mish-mash of scenes!! WORD COUNT ⁺⠀7.8K. NOTE ⁺⠀i guess this is.. a chapter? or at least a little insight into these weirdo freaks idk.. but i hope u like it anw!!! if u hv any thoughts please tell me or i’ll blow up!!! and finally thanku to my fave isa for making the decision for me for this to be through hasun’s eyes (bc it was originally gonna b doyeon LOL). love u 🫂

ఇ⠀PRACTICE ROOM⠀3RD JUNE, 2021

Doyeon looked like he was an untied shoelace away from snapping.

It was just them in the practice room, the others having left not long after the choreographer did to spend the rest of their evenings however they so desired. Hasun stayed because of the creeping worry he was falling behind, an uncomfortable feeling hanging over his head that if he didn’t get up to standard soon he would simply be cut. Easily, thoughtlessly, as he had seen the company do before and feared they would do again.

Why Doyeon was still there, though, he had no clue. The older seemed miles ahead of him in terms of talent, every move he made flowing perfectly into the next. Doyeon was like honey, slow and sure and golden, and Hasun supposed that made him something of an irritating bee trying to replicate it for himself. He had first tried to just shut him out, focus on his own steps and twists and turns, but soon the force of Doyeon’s trainers against the wooden floor were starting to drown out the music from the speakers, and Hasun had been watching him ever since, barely attempting to keep up the pretence of following the routine anymore. His movements were ghosts of what they had been earlier, eyes fixed on the figure next to him in the mirror.

The older boy seemed.. Off. What was once honey-smooth now looked more jerky, forceful. Like it was being pulled out of him, every movement too big for his body. His face was blank, eyes far away, and his hands were curled into fists at his side. Hasun’s brows drew together, mouth opening to call out, to try and snap Doyeon out of whatever trance he looked to have fallen into, but he faltered in the face of the rhythmic beat of trainers against floorboards and the melodic vocals of their mock-up debut track playing on repeat.

Everything seemed to grow in volume. Feet on the floor. His breathing in his ears. Music from the speaker, lyrics from the song. It was a climbing crescendo, and the chilling feeling was back—running along the nape of his neck, a feather-light touch across his skin that left it crawling. Something felt wrong.

The music only felt like it got louder, after that. As if protesting against the sense of dread that was slowly seeping into his train of thinking. His hands were cold, his feet ached, his eyes widened. Everything was slowing down, and Doyeon was stopping in place, and his eyes seemed to snap open in realisation, finally awake, and then—then he was crumbling to the floor, a pained yell ringing out around the room that echoed horribly in Hasun’s ears. The demo track carried on.

He was by his side in a second, hands cautious as they hovered for a moment before he finally settled them first on his back, then moved to his shoulder. He didn’t know what to do. Doyeon pushed to sit upright, the clouded-over look in his eyes replaced with something that Hasun couldn’t name, and didn't know how to describe.

“Hyung. Are—are you alright? Should I go get someone?”

The way the older one reacted made it seem like nothing sounded worse. He jerked further upright, shifting out of Hasun’s hesitant grip, and his hand made to grab at his arm, eyes suddenly frantic. “No, fuck. I’m.. I’m alright, Hasun-ah. See?”

To demonstrate, he pushed himself to stand and presented his hands in a flourish. It was almost believable, until he moved to take a step and one of his knees nearly buckled all over again. Doyeon slumped back to the floor before his legs could do it for him, face pale and all excuses shocked silent.

Hasun was starting to panic. His hands rose to try and reach for the dancer again, but he shoved them back by his sides when he saw how they were shaking. Idiot, he berated himself, glaring hard at the floor so Doyeon didn’t see the unsurety in his face. You’re supposed to be helping.

“Are you sure, hyung? Please don’t lie, I don’t.. I don’t know what to do.”

To Hasun’s horror, he felt the hot prickle of tears threatening to fall, a broken half-sob clogging up his throat before he choked it down and clamped a hand over his mouth. Shame came not long afterwards, the tips of his ears burning red-hot. He couldn’t be breaking down, not now, not here—not when, if anything, it should’ve been Doyeon brought to tears. Doyeon who seemed to be the picture of calm in that moment, teeth coming to gnaw at his bottom lip as he yanked up the leg of his sweatpants to inspect his ankle, brow furrowing slightly at what he saw. He lifted his gaze from his leg to try and reassure the youngest one more time, but stopped still when he saw the tears shining in his eyes, resolutely avoiding eye contact. His words faltered, coming out stilted, awkward. The positions had flipped, and now Doyeon was the one with no clue of what move to make.

“Hasun-ah, I’m fine. Hyung’s fine. There’s no need to—just. Don’t cry, Hasun-ah. Please.”

His attempts at consolement were flimsy, crumbling at the foundations, and so he gently set a hand on the maknae’s shoulder instead. That seemed to be all Hasun needed for him to collapse into Doyeon’s shoulder, head down and cries muffled in the thin fabric of his sweater. The demo track was still playing from the speakers, lyrics looping over and over. Hasun wished he was back in the dorms. In bed, underneath a duvet in a room that at thirteen had seemed so like a stranger but he now knew like the back of his hand. He wanted his tears to dry, the music to stop, a warm meal that evening, and for Doyeon to be alright. For everyone to be alright. He wanted to make it, and he wanted everyone to be fine when they did.

Doyeon appeared to understand without him saying a word. He simply pulled him in closer, a hand making its way to stroke over his hair softly, tangling and untangling the strands between his fingers. There they sat; in the practice room long after everyone else had left, long after the sun had set. Bruises were starting to form around Doyeon’s ankle, sickening shades of purple and blue. Hasun’s hands were still cold, his head starting to hurt from the soft sobs that wracked through his frame. Neither of them paid any mind, for now.

“We’ll be alright, Hasunnie. We’ll get through this.”

Maybe it was an empty promise, but Hasun didn’t care. It was good enough for him.

ఇ⠀CLUB (?)⠀5TH JULY, 2021

“Why are we here, Jalen-hyung?”

The strobe lights were hurting his eyes, painting him pink and purple and blue and a whole other range of colours he was too overwhelmed to remember the name of, the bass of whatever EDM remix they were bumping was matching how fast his heart was beating, and his hands were sweaty from where they were holding onto the back of Jalen’s shirt in a vice grip as the older led them through the back-alley club he’d dragged him to—for what reason, he could do nothing but guess.

Jalen turned back to him, the white of his teeth when he grinned gleaming at him even through the pseudo-darkness. “Inspiration. Why else? You said you wanted to write a song, didn’t you?”

Hasun shifted, straightening up when somebody knocked into him from behind and then carried on pushing their way through the crowd without so much as an apology. “Not about anything like this. I’m not—I’m not even allowed to be in here yet.”

All he got in response was an eyeroll, and then suddenly Jalen was off again, finally coming to a stop at a rare empty booth that he shoved Hasun into before cramming up next to him. Sweat was starting to bead across his forehead from the stuffiness of the room, and the older one’s voice was too loud in his ear when he leaned in close to yell in it.

“So just don’t tell anyone! It's not like I’m making you do shots, I’m just trying to get you inspired. What is it you even want to write, anyway?”

That was where Hasun stopped in his tracks, suddenly far too interested in the rings on his fingers than meeting Jalen’s eyes. The thing was.. He himself didn’t really know. Hasun just knew he wanted to do something, contribute something other than his vocals on the tracks and dancing for the stages. Every single one of the other members already had things to show, traits they were known for, both personalities and reputations already established (for better or, in some cases, for much worse), and Hasun had nothing. He was the nobody, the new boy. So he figured a good way to show people he wasn’t going to just stand around without pulling his weight would be to get his name in the credits for one song, at the very least.

But he couldn’t relay all that to Jalen. He’d probably just laugh, leer, pat him on the head and tell him that his voice would be more than enough, because he didn’t get it. Because it wouldn’t, it wasn’t, and it never would be. That was one of the first things he’d learned as a trainee, standing in the cold one November evening while his cousin stubbed out cigarettes under her stilettos and ingrained into him things that he’d never learn in any practice room.

They never just want your voice. Or your talent as a dancer, or your pretty white smile. It’s not that easy. You have to be someone, you know. You have to be the one who tells the best jokes, or gets the most girls, or the one who looks like they just don’t give a fuck about anything—about anyone. You have to write the songs, or get yourself onto billboards, or say the most in all the interviews. You’re not enough. She never said it, but it was written in the fine lines, the footnotes. Hasun was desperate to please and to prove, so with knuckling down and shoving some lyrics in front of their producer’s face with a hopeful smile he hoped to kill both of those birds with one stone.

But he couldn’t relay all that to Jalen. So instead he just shrugged, raising his head and trying not to mumble so he’d be heard over the music.

“I don’t know. Just.. Something. Something fun.” Something worthy. Something that’s enough.

The older one again gestured at the atmosphere around them, with a force that sent one of his dangling earrings swinging and an eyebrow raised in expectation. “Fun? We’re at just the place for it.”

For him, maybe. Hasun had overheard all the stories Haeil had playfully forced him to tell the rest about his life back home, everything he’d seen and done so far. Scenes like this probably felt like a place where he could slip into a second skin, into a nature he’d grown up inhabiting. For Hasun it felt like being thrown into the deep end, locked in a cage with his oxygen cut off. Everywhere he looked was another flash of glittering fabric, sparkling jewellery, and on occasion an LED-endowed vape clutched in the hand of a drunk partygoer—which Hasun was half-sure was allowed just as much as him even being in this place at all, but from how run-down the entire establishment looked (from both the outside and in) he wouldn’t be surprised if the smoke alarm’s wires had been cut long before anyone started flicking lighters or hitting blinkers.

The air felt as if it was weighed down, so laden with the force of sweat and perfume and powder that Hasun felt that if he stuck his tongue out he would be able to taste it. He laughed weakly in response to Jalen’s question and shimmied down further into his side, trying his best to melt into the cheap leather even if the stench of the alcohol that had seeped through it made him want to retch.

Unfortunately, Jalen wouldn’t let him off that easily. His grip around his arm wasn’t a rough one, but it was firm enough that he tugged him back into sitting upwards with ease. His gaze when he turned to stare into Hasun’s eyes was unflinching and uncomfortable, and the youngest wished he’d said yes when Jalen had asked if he was doing anything that night.

“Stop moping, just humour me for a minute. Ignore this shitty music, ignore everyone else—just stay in your head and think. Lyrics can be anything, you know, no one’s expecting us to bring anything deep to the table. Fuck it, you can write about the awful shade of purple they’ve painted the walls if it means you’ve got a song on your hands. Just.. You know. Try.”

Try. Try and write something fun. Something enough. He tossed Jalen a wary look in the face of his gentle encouragement, but broke the eye contact and tried to push out the overbearing noise thumping into his skull anyway. Stay in your head. His mind was quiet, a place of solace, and he slowly lowered his head into the comfort of his folded arms atop the table, tugging his beanie down over his ears in an attempt to muffle the bass even further, and thought. Felt.

It took a while for anything to form, while he sat there and stared into the ocean of neon lights and young recklessness, and when it did it didn’t even come all at once. It didn’t come in a perfect flow of intro-verse-chorus-verse, but instead in broken lines. Or rather, just one. But he shot upright all the same, and Jalen next to him jerked in surprise, eyes wide as Hasun tugged harshly on the sleeve of his jacket.

“Hyung. We need to go. I need to write this down.”

Jalen’s grin was just as wide as it had been earlier, and looked to gleam even brighter as he got to his feet and gave the youngest a hand, arm around his shoulders as he tugged him out the same entrance they’d come in from. Hasun’s eyes were trained on his feet, at the floor, desperately trying to keep what he’d thought of in mind, trying not to lose it to the tug of the crowd and the rhythm of the music. It wasn’t whole, wasn’t any sort of final product or finished piece, but when it was..

When it was, then maybe it would be enough. But only then.

ఇ⠀CHERRYADE DORM⠀21ST JULY, 2021

The voices in the kitchen were far too loud for Hasun’s liking. He almost hadn’t heard them at all, because debut was around the corner and they were being worked to the bone, but the combination of the walls being so thin, his room being the closest to the kitchen, and the slamming of the front door with the harsh back-and-forth between whoever was out there that followed not long afterwards was enough to rouse him. He shifted upwards in his bed, bleary eyes struggling to make out one foot from the other as he shoved back the thin duvet and reached for a hoodie tossed over the chair shoved against his tiny desk. He was gentle as he pushed open the door, quiet as he pushed it closed behind him. The only light was coming from the warm yellow bulb under the stove hood, and bathed in it he could just barely make out Haeil sitting on the counter, face half obscured by the figure in front of him.

Hasun made to step closer, to ask what was going on, until he snapped to full attention at the sound of Jalen’s voice, the coldness of his tone cutting straight through the otherwise warm atmosphere.

“What the fuck were you thinking? Are you drunk? Is that it? How could you do something so stupid?”

Haeil’s face twisted into something ugly, and he shifted away from the older man in front of him, hand reaching up to rub at one of his eyes. His reply was just as harsh, his usual apathetic state turned cruel by whatever argument he was in the middle of.

“I’m not drunk, and I’m not stupid, either. God, you make it sound like I asked for this to happen. If you’re just going to give me a lecture, you can fuck off. I can take care of this by myself.”

Jalen’s returning scoff hurt Hasun’s ears. He only pressed closer, bringing his hands up to hold Haeil’s face in a way that was far too soft for how he was berating him only moments earlier. Hasun felt slightly sick, skin burning too hot for the thick fabric of his hoodie. He didn’t think he was supposed to be seeing this or hearing this at all. But he couldn’t turn away, rooted to the spot out of the morbid curiosity that was eating through him.

“Can’t you just let me help, for once? It’s late. Knowing you, you’ll knock everything over and wake everyone up. I don’t want to deal with a pissy Yijun at two in the morning, thanks.”

Despite how Jalen’s tone had lightened, lifting at the end in a half-attempt at a joke, a hand reaching out for Haeil to take, a silent plea for them to agree on a truce, the rapper was resistant. He squirmed out of the vocalist’s hold once again, and turned his eyes towards his feet, words only just above a mumble—so quiet that Hasun strained forward in order to hear, and hated himself a bit for it.

“You’re not my mother.”

The play at being civil dropped, then. So abruptly that Hasun could feel it in the air—like there was a drop in temperature, a shift in the mood. It was a step too far. The three steps back that came as the fallout to Jalen’s weak excuse of moving forward. Jalen straightened up, all previous notions of helping Haeil discarded, forgotten. His next words sounded mean in a way Hasun hadn’t known Jalen to be, the sardonic smile visible even if his back was turned.

“That’s a bit rich coming from you, isn’t it? Has she called?”

Silence rang out in the kitchen. If Haeil had taken it a step too far, then Jalen had just ripped it apart with his bare hands. All was quiet for a few moments longer, before the oldest moved to speak up again, hand slowly raising to Haeil—who was just.. Staring at him, eyes saying far more than either of them could ever out loud and body stunned still—again, before he dropped it with a sigh and turned on his heel. Hasun froze on the spot, unsure of whether he should return to the safety of his own room or press himself as close to the wall as possible and hope Jalen would brush right past him in the dark.

But before he could come to a decision Jalen had solved the issue for him, simply brushing straight past him without a mere glance in his direction and wrenching open the door to his own room, letting it slam carelessly shut behind him and leaving Haeil behind on the counter watching in silence, mouth having opened as if to call out after him but then thinking better of it, and Hasun with his heart thumping hard in his chest, socked feet unmoving from where he’d been stood throughout the whole ordeal.

And then there were two. Haeil looked to have curled in on himself, head hanging and arms loosely wrapped around his sides, and Hasun felt he had to do something—because if he’d gleaned anything from the conversation he’d just overheard, it was that something had gone wrong. So he steeled himself, pulled his hood down from where he’d had it covering his messy head of hair, and stepped forward into the low kitchen light.

“Hyung? Are you—is everything alright? I just heard some noise, so..” The lie settled uncomfortably in the pit of his stomach, but it was better than admitting what he’d just overheard. Haeil startled at his voice, head snapping up to face him, and what looked back at Hasun was a face that held something far worse than any of the scenarios the youngest had been thinking of. Haeil’s face was bruised, beaten, the beginnings of a black eye already starting to form. His arms looked to have fared a little better, but there was blood still sluggishly oozing from one of his scraped knees. The laugh he let out in response to Hasun’s question echoed around the empty room, sounding almost hollow.

“Does it look alright? Think some concealer would cover it up fine? Some drunk fuck jumped me while I was out for a—just. While I was out.”

His skin was burning hot to the touch, and Hasun’s hands were shaking as he tried to figure out what to do. He felt like he was back under the stark white lights of the practice room with a fallen Doyeon before him, a fawn on unstable legs. Haeil was a lot less receptive to his panic, though, simply pushing himself off of the counter (biting back a curse when he did so, the leg he’d injured shaking a bit when he landed on it too hard on his bare feet) and opening up the cupboard they’d unspokenly agreed was meant for the more miscellaneous things, fishing around for the unopened box of plasters and throwing Hasun a half-hearted thumbs-up when he found them.

“I’ll be fine, Hasun-ah. It’s nothing water won’t fix. Why don’t you go back to bed, hm? Hyung’s sorry for waking you up.”

The bathroom was all the way at the other end of the hall, and Hasun watched on in silence as Haeil hobbled his way down, melting further and further away from the warm kitchen light and disappearing into the darkness, the only sound being his bare footsteps padding across the wooden floor. Bright white illuminated his silhouette when he switched on the bathroom light, the blooming bruises on his pale skin almost unearthly in the unnatural glow. He turned and met Hasun’s waiting gaze over his shoulder, and the look he gave him felt inconceivable. The moment stretched on for a beat, another.

Haeil turned back and slammed the door shut behind him, taking the light as he went. Hasun, now standing alone in the kitchen, clad in his socks and sleep shorts and threadbare hoodie, felt like there was something he wasn’t getting—that there were lines he couldn’t see, and so was unable to read between.

But he supposed he’d never find out now. The only thing left to do was flick the stove light off and trudge back to his bedroom, falling back onto his bed and being unable to do anything but close his eyes and try to dream.

Haeil’s eyes stared back at him when he did; asking a question Hasun didn’t know how to answer, wanting to hear things Hasun didn’t know how to say.

ఇ⠀CAFÉ⠀30TH AUGUST, 2021

It wasn’t the first time he’d seen Yijun smile, but it was certainly one of the only. Hasun had no clue who he was talking to on the other end of the phone, but whoever they were had the main rapper grinning like a fool, all while Jaehee and himself were left to sit opposite and make small talk—which wasn’t going all that well either, seeing as Jaehee was far too busy trying to eavesdrop into the other’s phone call to make any sort of conversation with the youngest. So the only real source of entertainment he had was to play with the straw poking out of the top of his smoothie (that Yijun had earlier commandeered one sip of, and then proceeded to fake-retch at the taste of) or people-watch from their convenient window seat, watching as couples and friends and lone individuals wandered by.

“Do you have to? Fine, if whatever you’re doing is more important than me, then go ahead, but just know I’m getting you back next time I see you. Mm. Alright. Love you, bye.”

His conversation apparently having ended, Yijun carelessly let his phone clatter back onto the table and sat back in his chair, taking his coffee with him as he did so. Jaehee leaned forward eagerly, grin on his face as he started his interrogation.

“Who was that?” The leering grin on his face made Hasun feel like Jaehee knew perfectly well who it was, and was only asking to piss Yijun off.

The question served its purpose to a T. Yijun turned his nose up and released the bitten straw from his lips to snap back at him almost immediately. “None of your business. Nosy fuck.”

The fellow rapper pulled a face, slumping back into his own seat but not staying deterred for long, piping back up after only a few seconds of sulking. “I was just asking, God.”

Hasun wanted to finish his drink as fast as possible and leave the two to their oncoming argument, but at the same time he felt he needed to attempt to mediate. Surely they wouldn’t start yelling like they did on occasion back at the dorms—seeing as the café they were all sitting in was a very public place, and with Yijun’s first group scandal already under his belt after his run-in with a senior at Inkigayo they were already walking on thin ice.

“Well, don’t.” Came Yijun’s snappy reply, taking another pointed sip of his drink that drained the rest of it and setting it back down on the table with the force that made his phone jump in its place face-down on the smooth surface. “Why are you even here? I don’t want you to be.”

The pout on Jaehee’s face was starting to morph into something that looked more like a scowl. “Who died and made you leader? I’ll go where I want, I don’t care if you want me there or not.” It seemed like a final statement, but then the rapper was turning towards Hasun with a sudden grin that made him look like something of a cartoon shark, wide and pointy. “Hasunnie does, doesn’t he?”

Shifting awkwardly in his seat, now with the force of two unblinking pairs of eyes on him, the youngest gave a nondescript gesture that was an amalgamated mix of a shrug and a nod and wished the ground would swallow him whole. Jaehee huffed, seemingly unsatisfied with his answer, and Yijun burst into laughter.

“Doesn’t look much like it to me. You’re really running out of allies if even our maknae can’t bear to spend time with you.”

And with that, Jaehee reached his breaking point for the day. It always went like this, as Hasun had come to learn over the years they’d spent together. Jaehee prodded, and then Yijun shoved and broke and snapped in retaliation. The scraping sound of his chair legs against the floor was ugly, grated against Hasun’s ears, but where he winced, Yijun simply picked his phone back up and went back to scrolling mindlessly at something or other, not sparing the rapper a singular glance.

“I’m calling Jaeyoung-hyung. I’ll just—I’ll see you back at the dorms.”

He was gone without another word, one hand clutching the remnants of his drink and the other bringing his phone up to his ear, turning back for a moment to meet the eyes of Hasun watching him go and throwing him a final thin smile that looked too fake on his lips before he pushed the door open with a shoulder and was disappearing off down the street, only pausing for half a second to pull his hood up over his head despite the late-afternoon sun still being high in the sky.

“Well,” Yijun began, shoving his phone in his pocket for the time being as soon as Jaehee was out of sight and turning to face Hasun properly. “That was quicker than usual. Maybe it’s because my friend on the phone is a touchy subject for our Jaehee.”

It had sounded more like a sore spot for Yijun himself, but Hasun wasn’t too keen on meeting the same fate as Jaehee, and so kept his mouth shut. The silence that then fell over them wasn’t awkward, by any means, but it wasn’t the most comfortable either. Hasun just focused on finishing his drink, wondering if he should tell the older man to go ahead and not bother to wait up. The words were on the tip of his tongue, shifting to sit further upright so they’d come out coherent and not a jumbled mess of syllables, but before he could say them Yijun slumped down in his chair, a hand coming up to rake through his hair before the other joined it to dig the heels of his palms into his eyes for a brief moment.

He looked tired, all of a sudden, all the fight from earlier having left him. He reached into his pocket for his phone again, but swore under his breath when the screen stayed dark, battery dead. The youngest watched as his hands squeezed together tight before just barely relaxing, fingers coming to pick at hangnails and teeth gnawing at his bottom lip. Hasun took a breath, another, and then slowly brought his own phone out of his pocket, unlocked it, and held it out to the rapper. He didn’t know what Yijun wanted it for, but he was going to offer it all the same. Watching the older all twitchy and uncomfortable felt odd, unnatural, and he wanted to see him back to his normal self (even if that didn’t mean someone particularly kind, or caring, or all that nice at all) as soon as possible. Yijun stopped his picking and looked at the home screen of Hasun and Eunhee arm-in-arm to the face of the youngest and back again, hesitating.

“Take it, hyung, it’s fine. Just don’t.. I don’t know, drain my bank account.”

Yijun scoffed and rolled his eyes, quickly back to his usual brash act even if his hands were wary when they took the device from Hasun’s hands. “As if. I’d only do that to Jaehee, Hasun-ah. You’re my favourite.”

Hasun grinned, happy to see him back to normal even if it was just for show, just to save face. He then finally finished off his own drink and set it on the table, getting the feeling he wasn’t really supposed to stick around any longer to listen in on any more conversations Yijun was probably going to have. He started to get his things together, yanking the zipper of his hoodie up and shooting the rapper a smile.

“I’ll go first, Hyung. Call a cab when you go if it gets late, don’t walk home on your own.”

Yijun made to protest, but Hasun stopped him before he could say a word and stood from his seat, granting the older a wave as he gently pushed open the door and stepped out into what was gradually turning into the early evening. He’d get back before dark if he walked quickly, and so only turned back for a moment to grin one last time at the rapper before he turned and was on his way, wondering absently what was waiting (or rather, what was left) for him in the fridge back at the dorms.

Later that night, when Yijun slipped into his room after only a quiet knock, he gently placed his phone back onto the bedside table and gave Hasun another one of his rare smiles, small but genuine. There were no words that needed to be shared between them, nothing more that needed to be said.

It was only a small moment of understanding, one that passed as quickly as it had arrived, but it left Hasun feeling warm all the same. Left him feeling like he was getting somewhere, finally.

ఇ⠀DOWNTOWN GANGNAM⠀16TH SEPTEMBER, 2021

This was supposed to be a coffee run. They had practice in ten minutes, and instead of doing what he said he was going to do, Minhui had hopped out of the car, blew a kiss goodbye to Jaeyoung (and got a middle finger in return), took Hasun by the arm, and dragged him along to the closest shopping centre. He’d counted three coffee shops, and the dancer hadn’t spared a glance at any of them. Minhui seemed more interested in the rack of fur coats—made from animals that Hasun could only guess, in so many outlandish patterns and thicknesses and the rest that it almost looked like a scene from a movie.

“Hyung,” he hesitantly began, looking over his shoulder before drawing closer to the still-browsing older boy. Minhui only hummed in response, half-listening. “I really don’t think we should be..”

“Shut up. Go try this on.”

A coat twice the size of him was suddenly being flung in his direction, and he only just barely caught it, before looking back up at the dancer, wide-eyed. At the sound of their commotion a few other browsers had turned to see what all the fuss was about, and it made Hasun want to melt into the floor. At the maknae’s pleading gaze, Minhui simply rolled his eyes.

“Stop panicking, won’t you? I doubt we were actually going to practise today anyway—Yijunnie fucked off to go see some of his ex-members, and Haeil-hyung was out again last night. But if we get in trouble, then don’t worry,” he threw Hasun an overexaggerated wink, his smirk cat-like and vaguely unsettling. “Hyung will take the fall for you, aegi.”

He shuddered at the term of endearment, and Minhui clearly revelled in his displeased reaction if his responding cackle was anything to go by. Still, Hasun turned the coat around and slowly slid it off its hanger, before tugging it over his shoulders. It felt odd on his bare arms, the interior lining not so much a wild and fluffy affair as it was a silkier and smoother fabric. Minhui cooed again far too loudly when he gave him an indulgent flourish of his arms, tugging his phone out of his back pocket and aiming it straight at him.

“Yah, hyung. I never said you could take pictures.” His complaints were rather unfounded when he wasn’t doing anything to stop him, but he felt he needed to get the message across anyway. Minhui, of course, ignored it.

“You never said I couldn't, either! Do a twirl for us, Hasun-ah.”

Muttering under his breath the whole while, Hasun did as told while the dancer snickered and snapped picture after picture every second of the process. He found he felt less worried about the potential prospect of missing practice the longer he was away from the company building, everything being much easier to forget when it felt like it was just him and Minhui—no managers, no staff, no-one. Just them, the generic pop songs they were playing on the in-store speakers, and a rack of fur coats.

Minhui got bored eventually, after he’d made Hasun try on everything he could find that piqued his interest, and he left the maknae struggling to catch up when he abruptly walked straight back out the entrance to the store in the same manner he’d entered: rushed, in a way, every step almost too quick to catch, but also with purpose, confidence. Like he was the owner of every location the chain belonged to, dropping in for a surprise visit and putting everyone on edge before leaving again.

He hadn’t seemed to have figured out their next stop, as when they were out in the busy Gangnam street again he stopped and turned aimlessly a few times, taking in the abundance of billboards and flashing lights and people everywhere he looked. Hasun took a small step away from him, not exactly wanting to be associated with the pink-haired dancer twirling around on the spot while innocent onlookers were made to be his witnesses, but similarly took a moment to simply stand and stare at the bustling city around him.

It felt like too much—car horns beeping at one another, ten different conversations between twice the amount of people floating into one ear and out the other, glaring LEDs hitting him in the eyes on every building he dared to glance at, and about three different idols staring back at him from their places in bus stop windows or billboard advertisements, holding whatever product they were being sponsored by close to their porcelain faces—but at the same time, it felt just like home. A part of him as much as everything else was, as much as the company was, as much as the group was.

It’d been hard to truly get a grasp on at first, what with the training and the debuting and everything in between that had made his life far too hectic for him to take a minute and really accept where he was and where he wanted to go, but now in the stolen moment of peace—by himself, with Minhui at his side, on what was supposed to be a coffee run, when they had certainly missed whatever practice there may or may not have been by now—he felt he could finally process it all properly. This is where I am. This is where I want to be. I don’t know where to go next, but that doesn’t really matter, because I don’t need to know that right now. Right now, he could just be. He could just sing the lines they gave him, dance the choreography they taught him, and just hope he was doing alright instead of worrying if he was going to be replaced.

A smile grew on his face, quiet but wide. Hasun enjoyed the moment for a second more, another, but it was ripped away from him by a complaining Minhui tugging at his arm, apparently bored with (or had gotten dizzy from) his spinning-around-in-circles gimmick.

“Hasunnie-yah. Let’s go get lunch, hm? I’m starving. It’s all on me, but if you want dessert then it’s gonna have to come out of your own pockets.”

Hasun rolled his eyes, but didn’t complain any further, letting himself be dragged along to whatever eating place Minhui could find and listening to all his tangents and rambles on the way. He didn’t feel all that annoyed at his moment being ruined—in fact, he felt it only would’ve been ruined if Minhui had let him overthink any further. He felt that his acceptance of his place was something that should be processed simply and left at that. This is where I am.

And, as he was taken down winding alleyways and wide open stretches of the high street, surrounded by conversation and lights and life, he didn’t think it was an all-too-terrible place to be.

ఇ⠀JAGUAR BUILDING⠀25TH NOVEMBER, 2021

As soon as Hasun entered the recording room, all eyes swivelled to him. Yijun, Daejin, and Doyeon were the only ones there, but even their three gazes combined made him feel uncomfortable, the back of his neck burning as they just continued to stare. It was only when he was just about to pipe up and ask what was wrong that Daejin sent him a sympathetic smile and turned fully in his chair in front of all the production equipment, pushing his headphones down to rest around his neck.

“Hi, Hasun-ah. I don’t want to be too much of a bother, but.. Do you think you could go find Jaehee?”

The immediate question on the tip of his tongue was why, and Yijun spoke up to answer it without him even needing to say a word. “He threw another tantrum and stormed off. Daejin-hyung wants his part done by tonight, so we don’t have to listen to his shitty vocals any longer than we need to.”

Doyeon clicked his tongue in disapproval at Yijun’s choice of words, but didn’t move to say anything to disprove them. Daejin visibly bit back a smile but shook his head anyway, quashing the grin completely as he looked back to Hasun to hear his answer. The maknae nodded easily enough, and turned to leave—but then stopped abruptly and swung right back around on his heels when he realised he had no idea where the rapper was.

“Where would I find him, hyung?”

That seemed to draw a blank out of them, both the producer and leader doing nothing but shrugging helplessly. It was Yijun that spoke up again, not looking particularly happy about the answer he had to give.

“Outside. Round the back, near the main road. Tell him to go home if he’s crying though, that sniffling would drive me crazy.”

Doyeon did speak up at that, reaching over from his place settled on Daejin’s tiny leather sofa to whack him lightly on the thigh. “Leave off, Yijun-ah. The only reason he stormed out in the first place was you. As usual.”

The vague directions had only been a half-help, but Hasun was sure he’d find Jaehee if he wandered outside long enough and turned back around, letting the door swing to a close behind him as he navigated back to the elevator. Evening had long since fallen, and he stared out at the city skylights in silence on the way down.

The November air was biting through his thin hoodie, and he hoped he wouldn’t have to be looking for too long as he took the first step outside the company building. Near the main road wasn’t very helpful, seeing as they were near about three, but he diligently fished his phone out of his pocket and fiddled with the flashlight until he had a more reliable source of light that wasn’t the fleeting car headlights passing by every few moments and began his walk, straining to hear anything that wasn’t the skid of wheels on tarmac or distant conversation from the nearby shops and bars and restaurants.

“Jaehee-hyung? Hyung!”

Another harsh gust of wind hit him right in the face, and Hasun was starting to get tired of looking for the rapper already. Maybe he could just say he couldn’t find him, and go back up to Daejin’s nice, warm, recording room. Yijun definitely wouldn’t mind—would probably celebrate, even. Doyeon would just sigh and accept it, and Daejin would wave it off and say it could always be recorded another day. The more he thought about it, the more pleasing of an idea it seemed to become.

“Hasunnie?”

Nevermind. He whipped around, curious as to where the voice had come from. It was definitely Jaehee, but he just couldn’t see him. That was, not until he looked down. Then he found the very person he was looking for crouched down on the gravel with his back against the wall and his phone in hand, open on a contact whose name he couldn’t read that well upside down. Jaehee was quick to shut it off and shove it back in his pocket as soon as he recognised Hasun anyway, standing back up and smiling the same thin smile he always did when everyone else knew that, really, he didn’t feel like smiling at all—the one that was stretched too wide, far too obviously fake for someone who used to be an actor.

“What’s up? Did you want something?”

Hasun shifted on his feet, pulling his hoodie tighter around himself. “Daejin-hyung wants you back up at the recording room. Says he wants your parts done by tonight.”

The smile almost immediately melted into a scowl, his figure slumping over and head lolling back as he groaned aloud, breath coming out in a visible cloud in the cold air. “No, God no. Not until Yijun-hyung’s gone. If he’s still there I’ll just do it tomorrow.”

The maknae’s brow furrowed, not really wanting to stand out in the cold and listen to the inevitable explanation of their latest fight but hearing the unspoken prod for him to ask about it and doing so anyway.

“What happened now?”

Jaehee slid back down against the wall, phone back in his hands as he passed it from palm to palm like it was a stress toy of sorts, absentmindedly chucking it up into the air and just barely catching it when it fell back down. “He was just—talking shit. As he normally does. I don’t know why it got to me so bad tonight, though, but it just.. Did. I needed a break.”

Hasun nodded empathetically, still hopping from foot to foot. The rapper’s head tilted back to lean against the surface behind him, his face scrunching up, and for a moment Hasun had the panicked thought he was going to cry. He felt out-of-touch and awkward with Jaehee on a normal day, but if he was crying then it would no doubt be thousands of times worse. Thankfully, the rapper only relaxed his face again and sighed, his phone having dropped to the concrete beneath his feet but making no move to pick it up. His next words were quiet, strained, and Hasun had to lean closer for him to be able to hear them at all over all the other noises assaulting his ears.

“I—I don’t really know what we’re all doing this for, to be honest. I don’t even know if we’ll even make it that big in the end.”

His words blew away with the force of the winter wind, but Hasun felt frozen still. He felt like he needed to say something, to attempt to comfort him even if he had the feeling anything he came up with would sound hollow, empty. He thought it over for a few long seconds before clearing his throat, forcing the words out when they felt like they were choking him up.

“It’ll be alright, hyung. We’ll—we’ll get through this.”

Hasun felt cheap, using Doyeon's words to him from four months ago on Jaehee now, but from the way it got his face to finally lighten up again after he let the words sink in for a few moments, got him to pick his phone up from the floor and slowly stand back up to join him in walking back into the company building, he figured they were as much of a comfort to Jaehee as they had been to him. Even if they both knew it was unfounded, standing on shaky legs and likely to crumble with the next disagreement, the next fight, it was good enough for now.

And that, in the moment, was all that mattered.

#⠀⬦ ⠀˚⠀⠀ALL ABOUT ME⠀⠀⸻⠀⠀writing.#⠀✸ ⠀˚⠀⠀너도 이미 STAR⠀⠀⸻⠀⠀development.#fake kpop oc #fake kpop group #fake kpop bg #fictional kpop group #fictional idol group #fictional idol community

13 notes · View notes