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jhuzen · 1 year

Note

Hey I just love your study habits story and I was wondering if you’ll ever make a part 2? Because god damnnnnnnn that is my shit

hypothesis testing [m.reader]

paaaart 2! of this trainwreck. i had to take my time on this because my brain cells could not for the life of them remember how people get together normally. so… this is not normal lmao. also ft. our dendro daughter because i love her so much.

𖦹 wholesome moments with nahida contrasting your moment with haitham and kissing :) slight traveler x reader if u squint at that one part.

“I think Alhaitham might be avoiding me.”

Nahida looked up from the dough she was kneading, her bright green eyes looking at you with wonder and curiosity. You stifled a laughter at the young archon (not so much in comparison to your age) — with her cheeks dusted with so much flour and bits of the dough stuck in her hair, it’s not everyday someone sees their archon in such a state.

“How do you mean?” Nahida turned her focus back to the dough, her eyebrows knitting in concentration, but it was clear that she was still all ears.

You looked down on the tofu you were cutting — the traveler had gone and dropped by some ingredients fresh from the stores back in Liyue after you and Nahida made a passing remark of wanting to try a different delicacy. Ever the charming outlander they are, they came back a few days later with a recipe and the ingredients on hand, it was only a shame that they couldn’t stay to help or eat, considering that they were currently busy with commissions as well.

You remembered offering housing them in on a stipend out of your own pocket — to rest even without having to worry about commissions and mora for a few days, but the traveler refused with a red face and ran off somewhere.

Now where were you again? Oh, yes. Alhaitham.

Jumping to conclusions, while tempting as a way to cope through unanswered queries, is not a habit slotted into your head. You were a patient man, looking through the lens of observation, testing a few hypotheses you’ve come up before finally drawing out a theory. Deductive reasoning, if you will. It’s how you worked on your research projects after all, especially despite the fact that inductive reasoning was more encouraged in your discipline sometimes.

And throughout the next few weeks, after your little study session that you conducted in Alhaitham’s home, you started seeing less and less of the man. Which, again, wasn’t that much to fuss over. You yourself placed him in a position of power where he’s not exactly allowed to have a much more leisurely schedule than he did as a scribe for an equal pay. But even then, he wasn’t this busy.

You recalled the few times on his first few days as the Acting Grand Sage — he was busy, but he always had enough time to entertain your whims and review your new research material for approval. He had enough time to spare you an hour or two to indulge his company, even more so when you would bring his preferred cup of coffee from Puspa café.

And now, it seems like every time you were planning to head to the Alhaitham’s new place of work, he’s always unavailable. And on the off chance that you catch his silhouette by the door, the moment you start walking up to him, it’s like he has a sixth sense for your presence and suddenly dissipates into nothingness.

It was… annoying. Bothersome. Troubling. It irked at your very core. It provoked something deep within you that even you have yet to figure out.

Nahida noticed your brooding silence and was kind enough to pull you back into the real world before you make the mistake of cutting your finger instead of the tofu, “Is the situation really so troublesome, [Name]?” Her kind eyes were quick to melt away the coldness that slowly gnawed at you. “Maybe it would help if you voiced it out.” She gave you an encouraging smile and truly you were certain that despite being her caretakers, it’s these moments that reverses the situation at hand.

Something you didn’t entirely mind. You appreciated Nahida’s efforts in exercising the application of the knowledge you’d graciously given her as her tutor.

“I would be remiss if I were to refuse a second opinion. Alright,” you resumed into your cutting, “It’s merely a working hypothesis, however… but it feels as though he has been making a conscious effort not to be around me recently.”

Nahida’s tiny hands cupped a dough and slowly shaped it into something that resembles a ball, “Why do you say that? He could be busy with his new responsibilities.”

“I’m not one to exclude the possibility, of course.” You scoffed a little, leaning back to squint at the recipe propped up by a mere empty sack where the crab roe was. You ought to pay the traveler back, they never said, but apparently, such an ingredient costed them quite the mora. “However, there is a different feel. He has an air of forced ignorance around my presence.”

The Dendro Archon crooned quietly at your words, thoughtful and delicate, as always, “Have you tried to confront him about this before?”

“More than I’d like to admit.”

“Ah… then your hypothesis might be just right,” Nahida giggled a little as her confirmation sent a pout to your lips that you seemed to be unaware of doing. “Does it upset you?” Her query was no less than damaging, but the defensive part of your logical brain suddenly flared up. Your muscles stiffened at her question, eyebrows furrowing even deeper with a matching scowl.

“…No.”

“So it does then.”

You had half a mind to tell the Archon that she should stop reading your mind when you can barely even process your own feelings, as ironic as it sounds. But then again, she was great at observing you ever since you and her started being seen as a family unit, closer than ever, and no doubt her jabs at your mannerisms would be on point.

“Could it be that the reason this is bothering you is because… you miss his company?”

A shot in the dark, that’s all Nahida did. But the grip you had on your knife was an indication of her keen observations. And suddenly, your rumination was thrown out of the way as you pieced the puzzles together.

She was right, you missed Alhaitham. So deeply that it actually bothered you; that suddenly it evoked an emotion within you that didn’t register positivity.

“Ah. ”

Nahida’s light giggle echoed in your ear, and you finally resumed into functioning, placing the cut tofu on another bowl and turning to her, “I suppose gratitude is in order, huh?” You asked.

“Not really. It was enough for me to see you look so stunted. I never would have thought that you would be one to get stuck on your own feelings despite deciphering so much of it in your pursuit of knowledge in a human’s emotions.” Nahida laughed with light and airy amusement, “It’s very much like an adventurer that went through the highs and lows of nature, entering every domain, seeking out treasure only to completely miss it in the end.”

You resisted the urge to groan at her words. It was stupid, alright. You were stupid. Alas, it’s nothing you can fault her for. With a fond smile, you reached out to cup her face, wiping away the flour that dusted her cheeks with your thumbs, “Of course. Very much like an expert adventurer making the most amateur mistake.”

“So then, do you know what could have caused his sudden aversion?”

You blinked as your mind suddenly blanked out, “I… never really knew.”

“Wouldn’t it be a good time for the expert adventurer to go on another exploit and find the treasure this time?”

“It sure would… right after we make the food.”

The precious smile on Nahida’s face was quick to lift your mood. Quite frankly, your gratitude is endless towards Alhaitham, the traveler, and the rest for even mustering up the courage to rescue the archon. You of all people least expected that she would be the family that softened you up.

And while you were finally able to lay your feelings to a temporary rest after clawing onto the shreds of sanity (courtesy of Nahida), Alhaitham was not all the better.

What happened the moment Kaveh barged in on your study time was nothing short of embarrassing. Alhaitham barely had enough time to process what happened — well, either that or he had the memory permanently blotted out from his brain. It’s like a defense mechanism, to protect what little of his pride remained that day.

It certainly helped however, especially when Kaveh was around to tease him. The fact that he somehow magically forget what happened on that day was enough to get him by to keep a face so muted of expressions. It was the best that he can do to stay grounded in his sanity.

But even that was slowly chipping away the moment he realized just how present you are in his life. He became minutely aware of your presence more than ever, to the point that he thought that you were actively seeking him out. And well, you are. You searched for him everywhere and all he ever did was take three steps out of your peripherals and hide.

Alhaitham could never view the act of confrontation cumbersome. He treats it like an ordinary conversation, but there was a lingering smidge of satisfaction when the person he’s currently grilling with interrogation squirms under his gaze so uncomfortably. It’s especially indicative that he’s succeeded in picking the right person to corner, knowing that they will break and he will get his information not long after.

But it was different with you. A confrontation with you eluded him. It was something that he wanted to actively avoid. Alhaitham never charges into a battlefield without strategies mapped out in his mind. In every plan he conceives, there is a backup, and in every backup he’s created, births another backup for said backup. It’s ridiculous, but convenient most of the time.

However, you were a foe he’s actively aware not to engage in.

Though Alhaitham has to wonder if you were really a foe… or were you an indispensable ally. So indispensable that he can’t even afford to make a move out of fear of losing you. But his mind had to counter that logic — whatever he’s doing right now, surely it’s a way to lose you as well. By now, you’re bound to be aware of his active avoidance of you, and the thought of you realizing he wasn’t worth your while somehow left a bad aftertaste.

His hand flexed, gripping his writing tool tightly as his lips turned down into a scowl. He hated to entertain such an irksome thought, but now it presented itself as an intrusive thought of his. One that would be sure to keep him up from nights on end.

Isn’t he just lucky that you were a researcher? And if there’s something a researcher is, it’s that they’re persistent to get answers.

And isn’t he even luckier that you were already on your way up to his office, with a determined glare settled in your normally neutral gaze?

Alhaitham was all too distracted by his thoughts of you, that he didn’t even consider looking up from the myriad of migraines that manifested in a form of paperwork, completely missing that it was you who now barged inside his temporary office.

You didn’t even expect Alhaitham’s presence in the office. With all his time spent avoiding you, you already mapped out other potential locations that he could be in. But you checked the office in the off chance that he was inside. And maybe it was a blessing from the wise archon whom you just confided to, but Alhaitham was in his seat, signing away, giving approval after approval of every research sent to him as well as handling certain changes in the law of the city as per Nahida’s request.

The Acting Grand Sage never bothered inquiring the business of his unwanted visitor. All he wanted right now is to go home and rest and maybe think rationally about his feelings that were repressed for far too long. It was going nowhere and he had a dislike for things that lead nowhere and make him unproductive all the more.

One can only imagine the surprise when you slammed your hands on the table, the action echoing within this glorified space. Alhaitham looked up abruptly, only then wishing that he had been more prepared.

You came and he had no battle plan.

“What are you…”

“Why are you avoiding me?” You cut him off with little remorse, leaning further in and Alhaitham had to lean away from you, feeling overwhelmed. You didn’t even bother with the pointless small talk that you would indulge yourself in. You just went straight for his throat with no mercy and Alhaitham had no choice but to face the blade of truth.

He reconfigured and answered you with a question instead to buy time, “What makes you think that I—”

Your patience was running thin and that much could be sensed in the tension that wafted between you and him, “Don’t give me that. You’re elusive, but you’ve always given me the time of your day. And suddenly you retracted that privilege and I want to know why, lest I take you to the borders of Fontaine and have you tried in court.”

Alhaitham was dumbfounded for once. You… of all people, thought that his attention was a privilege? He couldn’t push down the feeling that welled up inside him — it was something good. And the fact that you were unhappy from such a ‘privilege’ to be revoked. Alhaitham had to restrain himself from biting on his lip, settling for a quick jaw clench to relieve the tension you suddenly placed on him with your incredibly direct words.

“Tell me,” you urged and swatted the quill away from his hand, shucking away the research paper that he was currently. And true to your eccentric fashion of doing things, you climbed over the pristine wooden desk just to get to him. You really weren’t risking a chance of him sliding out if you take a moment to go around that humongous desk.

Alhaitham had to keep himself still and maintain a strong will as your shoes hit the ground, finally leaving him no room for escape as you caged him in the seat — hands on either of his thighs, squeezing them so tightly.

“Talk and I’ll replace your position as this nation’s Grand Sage.” You bribed and he had to wonder if you were only dangling the bait in front of him, or were you desperate enough to offer and act on it.

“Why do you… even want to know…?” Since when did Alhaitham feel so breathless?

“I’ve been deprived of something I’m looking for, ‘Haitham. It took me just a word from the wise to realize how much I’ve missed your attention,” were you really planning to murder him right then and there? Your words are so cutthroat and merciless that Alhaitham was almost gasping for air.

Even from the comfort of his chair, he was unable to retreat and reconfigure strategies like he intended. He was melting from your gaze, like a candle burning through its fiery wick that was you. At this point, there was even no denying that you wanted answers. And Alhaitham wished he could give them, but to do so would put him in a path where there is a point of no return; a roadblock he can never come back from; a decisive factor that could dictate whatever kind of friendship he has with you.

And there is nothing worrisome with exercising caution as often times he himself would rather lay back down and let all the pawns do their work for him, only letting him reap the seeds he had sown through the tools that he has. But you… you were no pawn, you were a player in this game and he hated it.

You exhaled sharply through your nose — a telltale sign of your resignation. Oh how foolish Alhaitham was to think that you were letting him off just like that.

“…I’m no mind reader so I can’t possibly guess what’s going on with that head of yours,” you said and Alhaitham agreed. “And it’s clear that there’s no drawing out that answer out of you.” He would’ve nodded if he wasn’t too overwhelmed with you.

And suddenly a dangerous glint appeared in your eyes, “Sometimes I forget I’m capable of assessing people’s emotions.” A wry laugh escaped from your lips and Alhaitham was back to keeping his guard up as best as he could. “I hope you’ve read my papers about the physical manifestations of one’s psychological state, Acting Grand Sage, because I’m about to give you a demonstration.”

Regrets and Alhaitham don’t often cross paths in his life. Every action of his is carefully calculated and is conducted with his best interest in mind. And most of the time, everything turns out in his favor. He’s smart and strong (despite his dubious claims of being a feeble scholar, whatever that meant). But at this very moment, he had no choice but to face a mistake of his — that he and his pride refused to tell you that you occupy his mind at a copious amount, unable to sleep without even seeing you, going even worse when you did.

He didn’t tell you that your presence affects him so. That there’s something with the way your headstrong approach contrasted his roundabout and cunning styles, immediately uprooting the millions of plans he’s made with just one word from you.

All of that was all he could think of to keep him sane from this ordeal. But no, it wasn’t enough to numb his senses.

Not enough to block out the feeling of your fingertips lingering on the skin of his bicep, palpating his muscles with little regard to his apparent psychological being. You said you were only assessing him, but right now, all he ever wanted was to go and bury himself to save some skin.

“Tension on muscles — usually indicative of strong emotions… often unease… or…” your voice was quiet, but Alhaitham figured it only lessened from how all he could ever hear is the blood rushing in his ears. “Are you uncomfortable, ‘Haitham? Or are you excited?”

The jaw clench from the man was all you needed to know, “Hm. The latter.” You concluded and Alhaitham almost shot up from his seat, ready to protest but couldn’t even find the energy to do so. He was far into deep. And at the very least, he can just prepare himself from the tragedy that he created.

Easier said than done.

Especially with the way your hand slowly traveled to his chest, your touch shielded by his thin and tight shirt that hugged his figure. You felt your way around and a wail almost spilled out of his mouth, much to his indignation. You narrowed your eyes at him, as if you were chiding him from holding back on you — or was it just his imagination?

“Accelerated heartbeat, rather strong too.”

Alhaitham may not always be right in deciphering you, but he knows that look of yours. That look that you make when you’ve pieced everything together even with what little clues you have in your arsenal.

Before you can even speak, Alhaitham already averted his gaze, the back of his hand shielding his mouth as the final clue made itself known — the heat in his ears spreading to his cheeks, coloring them in a rather endearing bright shade of red.

“…You’re insufferable,” was heard from the Acting Grand Sage, muffled from his hand.

“Am I? When you’re the one who made me go through the assessment? You’re far more troublesome, Alhaitham.” Your hand left his bicep, opting to remove his hand away from his mouth, and yet your oh so devious hand either forget its place as it never left the plush mounds on his chest. “Are you ready to hear your results?”

With a half-hearted glare sent your way, Alhaitham didn’t even bother to stop you.

Didn’t even move when you leaned so close, breath ghosting over his lips, “Your uncertainty in our interactions, the way you always seem to give me enough time of your day yet avoid me at all cost. The idiotic push and pull that you do. It’s a way to cope, isn’t it? A cope from your attraction.” He had to suck in a sharp breath as the final words left your lips.

“You like me, Alhaitham.”

With one last bout of confidence, Alhaitham scoffed, “Aren’t you confident today?”

You grinned, “Confident enough to reciprocate your attraction too, as it seems.”

That quickly threw him off the loop, his lips quivering as he looked at you in pure, unadulterated surprise — but even he was unable to recuperate from the initial shock as you quickly pressed your lips against him, swallowing whatever possible refutation he could make.

His hands flew to your arms this time, clutching tightly as his mind frantically scrambled to kiss back, only to realize that he barely has any experience in the first place. And it was like you were even painfully aware of this fact as you took on the lead, letting him follow you through the movement of your lips. His breathing ran ragged and perhaps it was his slowly depleting oxygen, but he soldiered on even with his labored breaths, wanting to get a taste more of you.

Far too addicting, that’s what you were. You sent him into overdrive as you licked his lips so sensually, leaving him weak in his knees and on the brink of collapse, but you held him there, hiking him up and letting him lean onto you as you vigorously attacked his lips, biting and nipping so mercilessly, glee injecting itself into your bloodstream like a drug as you felt him squirm under your touch.

An uncharacteristic squeal was emitted from Alhaitham as your stubborn hand on his chest gave a gentle squeeze, almost knocking the little wind left out of his lungs. You finally granted him mercy as you pulled away, a string of saliva connecting your lips with his as the one piece of evidence that you messed him up in such a way.

Your thumb swiped over Alhaitham’s wet lips, finding it strangely endearing to him so pliant, “You’ve never kissed anyone before. That’s strangely adorable.”

He scoffed, “Like you have.”

“Oh? You don’t know what kind of research methods I’ve done behind the scenes, Acting Grand Sage. You’ve no idea how many men and women I’ve kissed for the sake of research.

Alhaitham frowned. If you were provoking him, then you sure did prove yourself to be far more successful than you thought. Something about the thought of you mingling with others left a sense of dread within Alhaitham and he could not stomach it. He took your coat by the hand and yanked you down, “I’m willing to strike those words from the record if you quit these methods.”

“Bribing the researcher now? That’s rich.” You leaned back in, and gave his nose a peck. “Though I don’t particularly mind. I like you anyway.”

He refused to lose to the likes of you and yet here you are already staking your claim over him with a confident smile, he huffed, “Make it worth my while then.”

You closed the gap between your lips with a hum.

“I certainly will.”

“Hey, Alhaitham you jerk! I need to—!”

For the second time, Kaveh’s inappropriate timing had struck, entering the office as the lift arrived at the very top. He bustled in with a fuming look, only to stop dead in his tracks at such a scandalous sight. And this time, it wasn’t even remotely indicative in nature like the last. Here was his stoic roommate, legs spread wide with you in between them, lips barely leaving each other as you both turned to him.

Kaveh can only hope that this is the last time he catches you two alone in a room… lest he finds an even more unflattering scene on the third time.

Because in this case, the third time is most definitely not the charm.

#i swear i’m not late because i was playing honkai and got so weak for the girls #i also swear i’m not weak because i spent an entire day looking at blade #hsr when ugh #genshin impact x male reader #alhaitham x male reader #alhaitham x gender neutral reader #jhuzen’s stupid one shots

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lady-nuggetz · 3 months

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Because no one asked, I decided to draw up my OWN special interpretation of Team Hooligan, ✨WITH JEST!!✨

Mind you everything is mostly based off of my own headcanon, so enjoy it as you will!! I'll write brief descriptions that you can read right here !!!!

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Fang the Sniper/Hunter

He/Him // 21 yrs old // Australian🇦🇺 & Dominican🇩🇴 // Bisexual

Fang is a mercenary/bounty hunter and the leader of Team Hooligan. Though he often works alone for most gigs, he considers his team to be a found family of sorts, despite not always getting along with them. He has a great fascination for guns, but often uses his regular cork gun unless it's for serious situations. He's easy to anger and is heavily motivated by his greed and desire to prove himself as a top notch mercenary. Though things don't always work in his favor.

He's told very few people about his origins, how he had once descended from a noble family, until "one incident led to another and now suddenly I'm all on my own!" The one thing he absolutely REFUSES to tell people is that Fang isn't really his birth name.

• Cocky, Greedy, and Selfish. Probably has a slight tinge of insecurity due to past failures with Sonic and company.

• Keeps cigarette packs on his person often.

• Has a small shack he and the others share together over in Mirage Saloon Zone. He started sharing his room with Jest once she started hanging around.

• Loves mechanics, no one else but him drives the Marvelous Queen, it's a vehicle of his own design.

• Likes playing card games, spicy food, and keyboards.

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Jest the Jack Rabbit

She/Her // 21 yrs old // Puerto Rican🇵🇷 & Trinidadian🇹🇹 // Bisexual

Jest is another bounty hunter, who despite her silly clown appearance, is a very threatening figure. She's agile, quick witted, and carries around a baseball bat she calls the Wacky Whammer, that's bound to give anyone a painful concussion. She came across Team Hooligan after they [Mainly just Fang] attempted to mug her, to which they received a harsh beating at her hand. She has found herself to be fixated on their leader however, and sticks around them to watch them struggle for success.

She grew up in a circus with her sisters, before finding herself fixated on the chaos emeralds and chaos energy. Unleashing an ultimate chaos has been her grand goal as she hopes to spread her madness across the world. She plans to achieve that, either by herself or with other comrades as her stepping stool.

• Loud, Annoying and Obnoxious. Loves to push Fang's buttons and watch him lose his cool. Her not so secret crush on him is absurd.

• A known sadist, she enjoys intimidating others and seeks out the emeralds for power and chaos.

• Enjoys gossiping with her friends, Ace and Solar, particularly about the Hooligans.

• What her and Fang have is a somewhat open secret. It's hard to tell if they hate each other or love each other. From their endless bickering to Jest's raunchy flirting.

• Likes cinnamon buns, yo-yos, and fondant.

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Bean the Dynamite

Any Pronouns // 15 yrs old // Brazilian🇧🇷 // Pansexual, Genderfluid

Bean is a young and spontaneous explosives expert, with a goofy and hyperactive personally that keeps the team on their toes. He carries around comically large bombs, no one is really sure HOW he does, but they don't ever seem to question his methods. Despite his lighthearted demeanor most of the time, no one can ever seem to tell what he's got cooking in that brain of his.

Not much is known of where Bean came from, but from what Bean's told about himself, he remembers being in an egg. And a great amount of movement. Up until he hatched and found himself all alone in the middle of the forest. Most just assume he hit his head or something before he ran into Bark.

• Silly, Scatterbrained, and Crazy. Hard to tell if he's a bad guy when he's so comedic.

• Fidgets constantly, he can't sit still for more than a few minutes.

• His bombs are handmade, and he likes gifting them to the others as surprises or as little pranks.

• Considers Bark to be an older brother figure who keeps him in check. Buys him Father's Day cards.

• Likes comic books, explosives, and gummies.

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Bark the Polar Bear

He/They // 23 yrs old // Russian🇷🇺 & Haitian🇭🇹 // Pansexual Demiboy

Bark is the overall brawn of the team, being the strongest physically and able to do most of the heavy lifting if necessary. He's the most level headed as well, and finds himself being the one to pull everyone back when things get too complicated [If Fang himself isn't having a pissy fit]. He's particularly shy and doesn't really like communicating much with others, as he finds it quite difficult. And despite his rather prickly job, he means well and cares for others like Bean and Amy Rose.

Before he had become a member of Team Hooligan, it's been said that he's gotten his fighting experience from being that of a professional fighter. He doesn't enjoy bringing it up, but he prefers what he's got going on now. If any of the others ask to fight him, he'll consider the offer.

• Quiet, Tough, and Stoic. He cares though, he's just a bit shy when it comes to feelings.

• A walking furnace, he gets warm easily and has an itch for cold food often.

• Used to fight professionally at one point before joining Fang's gang.

• Selective mute and often communicates with sign language or writing.

• Likes seafood, belly rubs, and coloring books.

#sonic #sonic the hedgehog #Sonic oc #sonic the fighters #sonic superstars #sonic triple trouble #team hooligan #fang the hunter #fang the sniper #bean the dynamite #bark the polar bear #jest the jack rabbit #headcanons #HOOLIGAN HEADCANONS #WEEEEEEEE #I'm so sleegy

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ro-is-struggling · 5 months

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Goodmorning Ro! I wanna send in a request for your event but don't have much in the way of specifics so I hope that's alright? Besides, I don't remember that episode and would love to see where you take it if you take it. Anyway hope you have a good day!

Prompt: 9 (Part 1)

Character: Dr. Strange (Character B)

Genre: Comedy/Fluff/Light Smut(if inclined)

OMG I'M SO SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO POST IT! Life got in the way and I had to stop writing for a while, but I'm back now! Thank you for your patience and I hope this silly little fic finds you somehow after all this time anon💕

I loved writing this one! I tried my best to combine the above-mentioned genres as best as possible, but idk, I hope I did a good job. I feel like I wanted to make it more of a crack fic at the start but then I got carried away and ended up being more spicy. I literally had to stop myself from turning this into a full on smut lol I hope you like it anyways!

THE CALL || STEPHEN STRANGE X READER

Summary: During a girls night you are challenged to leave a dirty message for Stephen Strange as part of a game of truth or dare. You accept without much thought, the alcohol in your system stopping you from realizing that your relationship would never be the same after that.

Warnings: suggestive tones, alcohol consumption, attempt at humor, teasing, a bit of dirty talk, name calling (whore) implied smut

English is not my first language

Word count: 4300

This fic is part of my 600 followers celeration

The girls' night was Wanda's idea. After the stressful mission you had been through, hanging out together to relax and gossip was exactly what you needed to recover. Nat and you were a little tired, but eventually gave in after Wanda convinced Hope and Sharon, who happened to be in the avengers' compound when you arrived, too. So you all changed into your comfiest pajamas and, after kicking all the men out of the living room, you all settled down on the couch with a cheesy rom-com playing in the background as you chatted.

The tiredness and tension disappeared from your body as you laughed with your friends, joking and listening to their love problems. It was nice to switch off your brain every now and then and act like you were normal people, worrying about trivial things instead of thinking about the problems affecting the world. It kept you sane and restored your faith in humanity. There was nothing that improved your mood like hanging out with your friends just eating junk food and talking about stupid things.

You were having a good time, drowning in pizza and ice cream while laughing, but when Natasha started mixing drinks things started to go off the rails. With the alcohol levels in everyone's blood rising the conversation became increasingly more chaotic and wild, confessing embarrassing secrets and constantly telling one another how much you loved each other. It wasn't long before someone suggested playing truth or dare and everyone agreed, far too drunk to think about the consequences.

The first few rounds were uneventful, consisting mostly of silly truths and the occasional simple dare such as taking a shot or doing something to annoy one of their teammates. However, as the rounds progressed and the alcohol got into your systems, the game got out of control. And when your turn came you regretted your choice of dare as soon as the words left Natasha's mouth.

"I dare you to send Strange a dirty voicemail." The redhead looked at you with a mischievous smile. Her arched eyebrow challenged you, wondering if you would even dare to accept her proposal. She knew how you felt about Stephen, she'd had to listen to you ramble on multiple times about him and his perfect face that looked like it had been carved by the angels themselves. She knew you liked him, but she also knew you were never going to make the first move. So she thought the best thing to do was to give you a little push —well, it seemed small in her alcoholized mind.

"No way!" you groaned, refusing to participate in the game. You weren't drunk enough to ignore that voice in your mind telling you that this was a bad idea.

"You can't refuse!" Wanda interjected. "That's not how it works!"

"If you do, you'll have to drink from the mystery cocktail and you don't really want to do that, trust me." Sharon said, remembering the horrible taste of the mystery drink Natasha had prepared as punishment for chickens who didn't complete the dares. She didn't know what the fuck she'd put in there, but it tasted awful.

"Fine!" You gave in to peer pressure. "But it'll be anonymous!" The last thing you needed at that moment was to have to face the consequences of such actions. What Natasha didn't seem to want to understand was that your hesitation to confess to Stephen how you felt about him didn't just come from a place of fear of rejection, it was much more complicated than that. You could handle rejection, what you couldn't handle was continuing to work with him after such humiliation. Stephen was an avenger, so before you did anything you had to consider how it might affect the team.

"That's fine by me!" Nat aceptó y las demás chicas la siguieron.

"But I'm going to need a drink before I do this."

You took a sip of the strongest drink on the table, feeling the sting of the alcohol as it went down your throat. You needed a lot of courage to do what you were about to do, to lower your inhibitions to the point of losing your sense of shame and self-control. You weren't as intoxicated as you would have liked to be —you were definitely going to remember this in the morning—, but you figured it was for the best. You still needed to be able to speak clearly and form coherent sentences, two things that would be impossible if you kept drinking. So you rested your now empty glass on the table and picked up your phone, ready to get it over with for good.

"It has to be good!" You heard Wanda say as your fingers awkwardly searched your contacts for Stephen's number, making sure to set your number to private and encrypt it before doing anything so he couldn't trace the message back to you. "You have to talk like you mean it."

"Yeah! If he doesn't get a hard on after listening to your voice then you failed the dare." Natasha added and you threw one of the couch cushions in her face.

"That doesn't make any sense! You can't possibly know the effects it might have on him." You complained, pointing out your friends' exaggeration. "He might not even open it."

"Oh I'll know," Wanda assured you, giving you one of those mischievous smiles that sometimes made you question her mental sanity.

"Whatever," you said, rolling your eyes. "Any other requests before I do this? It's now or never." The girls shook their heads, giving you the green light to proceed. You took a moment to mentally prepare yourself, clearing your throat and blurting out a few words as you searched for a new tone of voice that sounded sultry yet different enough from your normal voice to throw Stephen off.

Before tapping on his contact on your phone you tried to focus on him and how he made you feel. His cocky smile was the first thing that came to your mind, the one he gave you every time his plans worked out after you questioned them. That smile drove you crazy. His lips in general drove you crazy. You spent more time than you'd like to admit imagining what it would be like to feel his kisses on your skin, caressing every inch of your body. You wondered if his tongue was as skilled at pronouncing incantations as it was at bringing pleasure to a woman. The mere image of his face buried between your legs, devouring you like a starving man was enough to make your center drip with need.

His hands were the next thing that popped into your mind, the way they moved in the air with precision each time he casted a spell. You loved watching him work, you got completely lost in your thoughts as you silently admired him, imagining how his hands would feel on your body, touching each curve with delicate sensuality. You were convinced that he really knew what to do with his hands to have a girl screaming his name in seconds, those skillful fingers of his were good for more than magic and you were dying to feel them exploring the deepest parts of your being.

Once you let your imagination run wild it was easy to find the right words to complete your dare. You didn't even have to think too hard about keeping a different voice, the low, sensual tone came naturally to you as you left a message for Stephen detailing everything you wanted to do to him —and everything you wanted him to do to you. You tried to control yourself since your friends were in the room with you, carefully choosing your words so as not to reveal so much about your true fantasies. But you made sure he knew how attractive you found him and how you were willing to let him do whatever he wanted to you.

The moment you hung up, all the girls burst into hysterical laughter, theorizing about what Stephen's reaction would be when he heard your message in the morning. You were buzzing with euphoria, too intoxicated to feel embarrassed, so you laughed with them. Your confused mind wasn't able to comprehend that you were the one who would have to face the consequences of your little game. That was a problem for the Y/N of the future and at that moment the next morning seemed to be far in the future. All that mattered to you at that moment was to relax and enjoy the evening, laughing with your friends. And that was exactly what you did until at some point you fell asleep on the living room couch.

When you woke up in the morning you regretted all the decisions you had made the day before, from accepting the first drop of alcohol to sleeping on the couch. Now not only did you have a headache that barely let you think, but also your whole body felt stiff due to the awful position in which you had slept on the couch. You grunted as soon as you felt Tony's voice, no doubt speaking louder than necessary to annoy you as he paced around the kitchen preparing breakfast. You hated the open concept building design more than ever at that moment, missing walls that separated the living room and sheltered you from the sound.

"I hate you." You winced when he came over to ask if you were going to have breakfast. He sounded so cheerful and amused while you were miserable that it made you angry. Your head was pounding and your stomach was upset. However, the smell of freshly brewed coffee coming from the kitchen forced you to get up, reluctantly dragging yourself into the kitchen where Nat, Wanda and Sharon greeted you with tired looks.

"Seems like you ladies had quite a night." Steve said with a smile, grabbing a cup of coffee and sitting down next to you. His hair was still wet from the shower, probably because he had gotten up early to go for a run like he did every morning. You never really cared about that, but this time you couldn't help but look at him like he was crazy for daring to do such a thing. The very idea of moving at a speed faster than a zombie made you want to vomit.

"Remind me to never drink again." You grumbled, taking one of the pills Nat had passed you. Sharon agreed with you, complaining about how the world still seemed to be spinning around her.

"What the hell did you put in that drink?" She asked Natasha, but the redhead just laughed.

"Shhh, can you guys stay quiet? My head is killing me." Wanda interjected, raising her head to give everyone a pleading look before plopping back down on the marble of the island.

Everyone's condition improved considerably after eating a lot of greasy food and drinking a lot of water. It also helped that the medicine kicked in, although you were still feeling tired and slightly sore. When you regained some of your good mood and will to live you went back to the living room, settling down on the couch with a cup of hot coffee in the hopes of watching the tv until your energies were recharged. However, your plans were ruined when you discovered that someone was already there. And not just anyone, but Stephen Strange, who was talking to Tony while holding his phone in his hand.

Memories of the night before came back to you in a series of flashes that replayed in your mind like a movie. You stared in horror at the men in front of you, wondering if Stephen had gotten your message yet. You sat as far away from them as possible, focusing on your coffee as you tried to listen to their conversation. Your strategy was to be discrete and play dumb if their eyes at any point caught on you, but when you saw Natasha walk into the living room you knew your plan was out the window.

"What are you guys talking about?" The redhead interrupted them, "Expecting an important phone call?" She added, looking at the phone in Stephen's hands with a raised eyebrow.

"Our favorite wizard here got a spicy message from an encrypted number and he needs my help to figure out who this mystery person is" Tony explained with amusement in his voice and Stephen gave him a murderous look.

"Thanks for the discretion, Tony."

"Spicy how?" Natasha pressed the issue to see if she could get Stephen to give more details, especially about how that message had made him feel.

"Oh you have to hear it, this girl did not hold back." Tony said and you choked on the coffee you were drinking. He had heard it! "She was really grateful to him for saving the world and wanted to give something back to him, if you know what I mean."

"We all know what you mean, Stark. You're not very subtle." Stephen rolled his eyes. "And give me that back." He snatched the phone out of her hands before she could pass it to Natasha to listen to the message. "Can you help me or not?"

"Why do you want to know who this person is?" Nat teased, looking at him with a raised eyebrow. "You really liked it, huh?"

"No! I just... I'm concerned it might be a stalking situation so I want to know who this person is." Stephen tried so hard to sound confident, but even you were able to notice the hesitation in his voice. He was making excuses. He was at least intrigued by the message and that made you feel a strange sense of pride. Even though you were a little drunk, you had managed to get his attention with your words and your sensual voice. Sure, he didn't know it was you, but that didn't matter to you at the moment, the confidence slowly building in your system didn't let you think about it.

"Hey! No one is judging here." Tony spoke up. "If I were in your place I would like to know who this mystery person is too."

Stephen let out a sigh, rolling his eyes. "Just let me know when you get something."

He stormed off, leaving you with a million unanswered questions and a strange feeling in your stomach. Tony ran after him and Natasha took advantage of the fact that you were alone to give you a gentle push to get your attention. You moved your gaze from the door through which he had disappeared to look up at your friend, who was looking at you with a playful smile.

"He's crazy about you." She stated but you downplayed it, saying he was only interested because he didn't know it was you talking on the other end of the line. However, you couldn't help but feel a little flame burning inside you. You felt confident and for the first time since you had met Stephen you felt you had a chance with him.

The next time you saw Stephen was during an Avengers meeting to discuss a possible mission. You barely paid attention to what Steve was saying, too distracted by the perfect profile of Stephen sitting next to you. The sunlight coming through the large windows illuminated his face in a special way, giving him an ethereal aura that made it impossible for you to look away from him and those ridiculously sharp cheek bones he had. It was torture to have him so close looking like a Greek god and not being able to do anything about it. Your new found confidence hated it. It took all your power to control your urges, striving to calm your wild fantasies at least until Steve let you out of there.

You were so lost in your own thoughts that you didn't realize the meeting was over until you saw the other team members disappearing behind the door. Soon it was just you and Stephen in the large conference room. You gave him a quick glance and noticed that he was looking at his phone once again. You wondered then if he was waiting for another message from you, if he was as crazy about that mysterious voice on the other end of the line as he seemed to be. It was pretty hard to contain your urges at that moment.

"Any new leads on your mystery person case?" your voice alerted Stephen, who looked up from his phone to rest his gaze on you.

"No, Stark hasn't called me yet."

"Is that what you were checking on your phone while Steve talked?" You asked him, getting up from your seat to move closer to him, settling against the table right in front of his chair. "If Stark had called with any leads?"

There was something in your tone of voice that alerted Stephen, a sensual undertone he had never heard in you before and it made him wonder what you were getting at. He had felt your eyes on him throughout the meeting, he always did, but for some reason this time it felt different.

"Why do you care so much?" He countered, looking at you with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm just curious as to what has you so distracted lately." You faked innocence, shrugging your shoulders. "Was it really that good?"

"Excuse me?" Stephen was surprised by your sudden audacity, though he couldn't say he didn't find it intriguing.

"It seems to me that you're desperate to hear that voice again." You leaned closer to him, lowering your head to be at his level. Your eyes were locked on his, admiring the dark shadow in the icy blue of his orbs. He held your gaze as the tension in the air intensified, curious to discover what your next words would be.

"I can help you with that," you added, using the same low, sultry tone you had used in the message. "Even better, I can show you just how hot I think you are... how desperate I am to feel your hands all over my body, using your powers to restrain me and do whatever you want with me."

If your voice hadn't already given you away, repeating the words you had said to him in the message definitely had. His eyes grew wide, looking at you with a mixture of surprise and confusion. You had never seen Stephen so perplexed and you had to admit that it felt good to be the cause of that. You were used to it always being the other way around. You used to be the one who was speechless every time he gave you a smile, it was nice to have the power for once.

Stephen was not an easy man to silence, even in the strangest or most stressful situations, he always found something to say. But now he was speechless, looking at you in complete astonishment as he tried to process the situation. It wasn't just discovering that you were the mysterious person he was looking for that threw him off, but also the confidence you exuded. He had never seen you act that way before, though he would be lying if he said he didn't like it. He couldn't stop his mind from running wild, imagining every detail of the message that occupied his thoughts but now with you. Never would he have imagined that behind your innocent look and shy attitude was an imagination as dirty as his.

"I can give you what you want, all you have to do is ask." Your warm breath would collide against her earlobe when you spoke, giving her goose bumps. Your perfume assaulted his nostrils with every breath he took, intoxicating his entire system with your scent. He felt dizzy, his mind clouded with desire and anticipation having trouble concentrating.

However, when you turned away from him, walking towards the door to finally get out of there, his brain snapped out of it. Raising his hand in the air, he conjured a kind of glowing lace made of pure energy that closed over your wrist, stopping you on your feet. With a gentle push he managed to turn you around to face him as he used his other hand to close the door to the room and pull down all the blinds with a simple flick of his wrist.

"Where do you think you're going? I'm not done with you yet. We're just getting started." Stephen said to you with an arched eyebrow. You noticed a hunger in his eyes you had never seen before, the cool blue of his orbs almost completely consumed by the black in his dilated pupils. It ignited a flame inside you, a warmth spreading through your stomach as you carefully analyzed Stephen's body language, trying to predict his next move. All your arrogance and confidence disappeared under his intense gaze. You were like a deer caught in the headlights, frozen in place waiting for his next reaction.

All he had to do was pull the glowing leash and you were forced to move closer to him once again. You would have lost your balance had it not been for his grip on your waist, successfully trapping you between his body and the edge of the table. You had nowhere to run, though you really didn't want to.

"Who would have thought that behind that cute and innocent act there was such a dirty whore, desperate to be seen?" Stephen's voice was condescending, mocking, as his cold blue eyes pierced into yours. It made you feel small and insignificant in the face of his imposing figure, your cheeks heating with the blood that was quickly pooling there from the embarrassment of being so exposed. He finally knew the truth, you were a dirty whore desperate for his touch.

"I never would have guessed you were the voice on the message saying those dirty things." He was barely touching you —his fingers trailing up your arms to your shoulders, following the line of your collarbones before descending through the space between your breasts—, but that was enough to quicken your breathing. And every time you inhaled, you breathed in his intoxicating scent, a mixture of his cologne and the aroma of his own essence that made your knees weak.

"I was hoping it was you. The first time I heard those words I closed my eyes and imagined you acting out those fantasies. I got so hard just imagining it." As if to emphasize his words, Stephen pressed his hips against you, letting you feel the bulge beginning to grow in his pants. You couldn't contain the moan that escaped your lips, a pathetic whimper that put a smile on Stephen's lips.

He was enjoying the growing anticipation, having fun with your suffering. He was torturing you as retribution for your mysterious little message that had had him going crazy all this time, forcing you to experience the same desperation he did, using only his voice to arouse you. You hated it and loved it at the same time.

"You have no idea how much I wanted it to be you...but then I thought it could never be, you're a good girl and good girls don't use that vulgar language." You looked down, unable to hold eye contact with him any longer as you felt the embarrassment taking hold of you. But Stephen didn't let you off that easily, taking your chin in his hand to force you to look at him. "Tell me, were you really so desperate for my attention to leave that message? Were you so desperate for me that you pushed aside your good girl attitude and manners to expose the whore you hide inside you?"

His voice was a husky whisper against your ear, his lips almost brushing against sensitive skin seductively. The ghost of his touch was driving you crazy and his dirty words traveled straight to your core, that throbbed desperate for attention. You could feel his presence, the warmth of his body against yours, his imposing gaze, the subtle caresses of his fingers on your skin, but it wasn't enough. You needed more to satiate your need for him, much more.

"Yes," you managed to mumble. Your voice sounded much more pathetic and desperate than you expected, but that didn't really matter. On the contrary, Stephen seemed to enjoy it. "I'm tired of hiding it, I need you Stephen... I need to feel your touch." You were practically begging him, asking him to have mercy on you and give you something to calm the flames burning inside you. But he just laughed. His warm breath hit the sensitive skin of your neck, giving you goosebumps. Your hands ran up his chest, determined to get for yourself what you needed as he refused to give it to you. If he wanted to torture you, it was only fair that you retaliated. Two could play that game.

But before you could go much further, Stephen pulled your hands away from his body, binding them behind your back with the same magical bond he had used to draw you to him. It was tight around your wrists, but not too tight, just enough to make sure you couldn't move easily. He wanted control.

"Oh, I'm going to give you what you so desperately want, don't worry about it, darling." He murmured against your lips, brushing them with every word he spoke. "But first I have to teach you a lesson... you see, you have to be more careful about what you wish for, because it can become real."

#ro's 600 followers celebration #stephen strange x reader #stephen strange x female reader #stephen strange smut #doctor strange x reader #doctor strange x female reader #stephen strange x reader smut

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elendsessor · 23 hours

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I really love reading people's hcs, especially if it's abtmy special interests. so i was wondering if you have any from the real world (y'know; sheffield, o'brien, real argilla and others ((I'M VERY NORMAL ABT O'BRIEN ">:D

it mostly comes down to sheff and o’brien since everyone else has like next to no complete info or are uber similar to their ai counterparts but i have a few!! sorry if this isn’t the longest list.

spoilers gang

-i mentioned in a previous post greg being a dog trainer but i also see him as doing a thing i see a lot of people at my local dog park do, being using the river as a way to train dogs to swim and retrieve things underwater. there’s also dog walkers who specialize in handling big off leash groups!!! just saying there has to be a reason his name is lupa and i will make up every reason possible as to why sob sob

-that or he has experience as a farmhand. i believe he’s a country boy mostly bc of my experience when i worked at a doggy daycare (there were a ton of people who had hunting dogs or some country adjacent fit i don’t even live in the south how are so many of them like this it must be some sort of requirement)

-bro would own an anatolian shepherd or three. fred was quite literally raised by wolves,,,, and by that i mean dogs meant to fight off wolves and bears (maybe he also has a malamute i mean close enough)

-fred is a roblox and fortnite kid

-if roland counts in this regard he gives me moe szyslak vibes so i do think he shares a lot of traits with him jdgnfsgnoyfgjh

-there was this one time @goatwithaplan made a post about atma avatars as animals and because of it i can’t see roland without thinking of bovines or goats or rams. he would have a pet goat.

(if you can’t tell animals are on the brain right now i’m sorry aaa)

-low key dating adil i can’t believe i remembered his name

-real argilla’s hair isn’t actually blonde.

-she also reminds me of sharpay evans from high school musical so i pretend she’s her.

-sheff is obsessed with true crime and medical shows. probably also would get a kick out of terrifier 1 and 2

-the weird cringe relationship with o’brien is real. they both hate one another for different reasons but god be damned they also have reasons to love one another. they never go on any real dates or say they’re boyfriends they just occasionally fuck.

-sheff flirts a lot. with everyone his age. nobody is safe. not even if you’re married.

-i have like. a nsfw one i’m too afraid to share (i don’t like getting nsfw) but there’s no fucking way sheff isn’t into particular somethings and absolutely annoys o’brien with them (both are consenting i swear)

-o’brien had a growth spurt in his sophomore year of high school. every bit of casual clothing he has is from around that time. maybe he forgets to actually replace them or maybe he doesn’t care.

-sheff has no fashion sense whatsoever and is a cringefail loser

-he has two pet rats who may or may not be named after a certain famous pair of cartoon rats

-constantly goes to shady bars because he would be that guy

-he gets told to shut up constantly. he refuses to. in fact, this makes him worse.

going back to the high school musical mention every weekend someone working on the god project hosts a movie night and yet at least once a month someone asks to watch high school musical 2 or some other dcom

-nobody likes margot. somehow sheffield is better liked. at least he has ✨“personality”✨ (if being an annoying twink counts)

#i have quite a few sheff ones just bc i like depicting him as the ultimate cringefail #i couldn’t take him seriously. he’s a shitty dude but he was silly to me #you can’t look at him and say “yes that is a man i can take seriously”#i love discussing these headcanons if you ever have anymore you wanna hear lmk #including animal/pet hcs for some reason i always have to give everyone some kind of animal they like #btw if you care anatolian shepherds are certainly creatures the only one i’ve ever met had a peanut shaped head #shantien answers #dds #megaten #headcanon hell

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snallavanta · 2 months

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how i differentiated and remembered the 13 members of seventeen when i was a baby carat

just a psa that this is just for fun! i obviously remember their full government names and faces now but it’s funny to see how far i’ve come.

i’m arranging them in order of who i noticed first to last so that the nicknames make more sense. for context, i learned about them mostly through nana tour so a lot of these have nana tour references

vernon — loml (funny story: i refused to acknowledge that his name was vernon because it reminded me too much of vernon dursley and i didn’t want to associate that character with him so i just called him my pookie every time i saw him on screen 🙃 i have now accepted vernon as an endearing term and not as the annoying harry potter guy though)

woozi — loml number 2. also known affectionately as girlypoppies (because of the way he dressed in GoM & world performances)

mingyu — blue suit guy (apparently he wore blue suits a lot to me? even though i literally cannot tell you one (1) instance off the top of my head where he wore a blue suit—unless you want to count the dior fashion week suit but that happened months after i first recognised him lol). cowboy guy (his performance outfit in GoM gave off cowboy vibes). innisfree guy. poor guy who couldn’t make a meringue in peace 😔 at this point, mingyu had too many nicknames that i kept forgetting which one was him. was also constantly confusing him with dk and wonwoo (especially in performances) LOL

s.coups — thai guy (he looked thai to me ok). also the guy who got the acl tear and couldn’t go for nana tour

hoshi — chef (he made a comment about how too many chefs would ruin the food—also happened while there were like 6 guys in the kitchen—and it was so funny that he has been etched in my memory ever since)

dino — sister’s main favourite guy. i couldn’t see the hype about him until the whisper game and he kept going “dino? dino. dino in korean is di-no. DINO.” that was hilarious. after that i could kind of remember which one he was

the8 — the chinese guy. red hair guy. also sister’s favourite (which i laughed at btw when she told me. then she didn’t want to talk to me about him for weeks which was so funny)

joshua — the other american guy

seungkwan — sister’s least favourite guy (btw i do not agree with this sentiment and i think her opinion of him is completely unjust). also the guy who cried in nana tour

wonwoo — the glasses guy. also brought his camera everywhere with him and wore the cute orange bucket hat. was easy to tell him apart during nana tour because he kept wearing the same nana tour t-shirt with his name on it so loved him for that <3

jeonghan — the feminine one. was always mixing him up with joshua though

jun — the other chinese guy. the guy who was alone a lot. also thought he was a genius when his mission in nana tour was to make someone fall asleep and he said coups because of the time difference. big brain behaviour, he earned my respect. also thought he was very charming during performances 🫣 like my guy just has a way with the dances (world specifically) that captivates me

dk — the guy who sings a lot. salute. also wore the cute green granny square bucket hat. kept confusing him with mingyu in their performances though

in conclusion, bless nana tour for having them wear shirts with their name on it because it made identifying and differentiating them so much easier. it’s so fitting in my case that the one guy who i knew and recognised was the one guy who REFUSED to wear the nana tour shirt until the last day 😭

#idk why i did this but i suddenly remembered i had a funny nickname for scoups #and i thought i should dig my memory up of the other guys’ names before i forget #anyway this was fun. i cannot believe i went from this to remembering their government names. what a glow up #who knew they would’ve become everything to me in the span of a few weeks 🥹#ann #seventeen

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buckysgrace · 1 year

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Twenty Eight

Previous Chapter

“I don’t want ice cream,” Kim whined as Addi tugged her towards the store. Okay, she had been the one to suggest it but she meant any place other than Scoops Ahoy. She could already feel the awkward situation that would arise once she bumped into Steve again. She had thought about that night at the movies a lot and wasn’t able to consistently stream together her thoughts on what it meant. She was sure to Steve, it was nothing, “Don’t make me.”

“Stop acting like a child,” Addi criticized as she pushed the door open, signaling the bell going off. Kim cursed the annoying sound as they stepped inside. Her eyes met Robin’s as the girl dropped her book, straightening herself up off of the counter and beginning to look flustered, “We’re getting you a boyfriend.” Kim huffed under her breath. No matter how reassuring she had been could convince her friend that she was happy in the situation that she was in. She still wasn’t sure what to call it, other than to refer to it as fun.

“I don’t need one.” Kim mumbled, feeling a bit honest. She still wanted one, but things had been so good with Billy that she didn’t want to risk ruining it. She hoped that he felt the same way and would at least resist going on dates with others for a while. She had emphasized that towards her friend, of course, keeping his name and their familial relationship to herself. Addi still wasn’t happy with her answer. She had asked Eddie to drop them off here while he went to get a new album from one of the bands he liked. Kim thought that Billy and him would get along with their music tastes.

“Hi,” Robin breathed out as Steve walked through the small double doors. Kim felt her pulse quicken as she looked at him in his cute little uniform, “What can I get you guys?” Kim felt herself pull away after Steve refused to look at her. She wondered if Billy had said something to make them go back to the way that they had been. She honestly didn’t feel as disappointed as she thought that she would.

“Can we just do two double dip bowls of mint?” Addi asked, digging into her purse as she smiled mischievously at Kim, “My treat.” Kim hoped that she got the worst brain freeze from this. Steve walked around, handing Robin two bowls. Kim looked curiously, noticing how her hands were shaking.

“I haven’t seen you since Tommy’s party,” Robin spoke casually as she scooped their ice cream out. Addi kept trying to switch positions so that Kim could hand the money to Steve but he seemed adamant that he speak to her. Kim wondered how disappointed he would be when he found out that Addi had a boyfriend, “How have you been?”

“Good,” Kim smiled in response as Robin slid the first bowl over to Addi. She watched as she began to scoop her ice cream out, “I honestly thought you’d be at the movie the other night with Steve. We could’ve all been together.” Kim joked but then thought that she said the wrong thing as she noticed the playful atmosphere turn very serious. Steve shot her a look and she honestly wasn’t too sure on how to backtrack on her words. Addi gasped next to her and Kim did wince at that, remembering then that she forgot to tell her best friend about that night. In her defense, she had been busy since then. Well, busy with Billy.

“Oh, you guys saw a movie together?” Robin’s blue eyes had frozen, turning to look at Steve slowly with her smile frozen on her face. At the same time, Addi turned to Kim and gave her an incredulous look. Kim smiled back sheepishly, having forgotten about the night at the movies completely. She tried to ignore the betrayed look on her friend's face as she turned back to Robin and Steve, waiting for her ice cream.

“Yeah,” Steve started slowly, an odd laugh leaving his lips as he glanced towards Kim, “It was nothing. Boring movie and everything. I mean we didn’t plan it, we were just there at the same time.” Steve concluded. Kim felt her eyebrows furrowing in confusion, thinking of how he had mentioned the movie wasn’t that bad. Was she really that boring? She had thought they had a good time and got along even if it wasn’t a date. Robin turned back to Kim unsure and she felt her hand twitching forward.

“Can I have my ice cream?” She asked unsure, looking at the bowl of green ice cream that Robin still had a tight grip on. Robin’s eyes widened in surprise before she pushed it across the counter, her cheeks flushing.

“Of course, I’m so sorry,” She apologized quickly. Kim shrugged it off. She wasn’t sure what was between Steve and Robin but she felt like she had overstepped majorly, “I hope you enjoy it.” Robin added quickly, still looking flushed. Kim smiled regardless of how awkward the conversation had been, understanding how it felt to not be with someone you wanted to be with.

“It’s no problem and really, Steve was just being nice. Nothing happened.” She added at the end. Addi was still staring at her, slowly stepping back towards the seats to let Kim know that she wanted to talk about it. Robin nodded her head fast and gulped hard, looking unsure of herself as she smiled.

“Doesn’t matter anyways. I hear you’re with Tommy.” Kim felt both of her eyebrows raise into her hairline and her mouth part in surprise. She could feel the burn down to the crook of her neck as she looked at the other girl oddly. That’s what people were saying about her? She had one dance with who she thought was a nice stranger and now she was supposedly dating him. No wonder Carol had confronted her in that manner.

“Tommy Hagan?” Kim finally felt herself blinking in surprise as she turned to look at Addi’s bewildered expression. The only downside of not being popular was never knowing any of their gossip that was happening in their small crowds, “I don’t, I barely know him. We’re not dating.” Kim laughed, sounding a bit awkward as she glanced to her friend for support. Addi only shrugged. She had mentioned taking a chance with the freckled boy but she doubted she’d feel the same way after what he’d defended the other night. She watched as Robin looked at her surprised.

“You’re not?” Robin turned to Steve quickly, giving him an accusatory look. Steve whistled softly, turning away from them and pretending to look busy by checking the scoops in the ice cream containers. She had no idea why the two of them would be talking about her. She was fairly certain they had been making fun of her for her crush on Steve the day at the diner. Maybe she was wrong. Maybe Steve did feel something for her again. Yet again, they were in the same friend group. Robin may know whoever had a crush on her as well.

“No,” Kim couldn’t help the giggle that left her mouth as her friend bumped her shoulder into hers, “Definitely not.” She smiled, watching how Robin’s expression grew into happiness. She didn’t understand it, but nodded as Addi pulled her towards a booth.

“You went out with Steve? That’s who you had Eddie buy movie tickets for?” Addi asked as they slid into a booth. Kim adjusted her skirt, making sure it didn’t raise too high over her legs as she huffed softly.

“No, no the guy it was for didn’t work out,” Kim mumbled a bit embarrassed as she thought about Billy ditching her to go out with Tina again. She felt like she had gotten her own little slice of revenge by letting him realize that she could find somebody else too. That she didn’t have to be with him. Even if that wasn’t particularly true, he didn’t have to know all of the gritty details, “Steve just happened to be ditched too- okay, okay don’t give me that look.” Kim groaned, setting her spoon in her ice cream dish as Addi’s grin grew into a mischievous smirk.

“How could you not call that a sign from God?” Addi asked, flipping her long black hair over her shoulder. Kim thought she looked really pretty today in her neon orange top. It faded against her skin nicely. Kim groaned, shaking her head quickly.

“It’s not like that. He said it wasn’t. You know, he said he has a friend that’s interested in me but he’s too shy to say anything.” Kim grinned, a bit proud of herself for having an admirer. Addi stared at her for a moment.

“He’s so testing you. It sounds like Steve is the friend.” Addi made quotations and Kim looked at her confused, shaking her head no softly but Addi was already nodding her head rapidly like she wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

“No, no he’s not. Why would he do that? It doesn’t make any sense.” Kim didn’t like the idea of having thrown herself at him only for him to lie about it. She really didn’t think it made sense. If he wanted to have made a move on her he would’ve done so.

“It makes total sense. Obviously he wanted to see if you were with Tommy or not.” Addi concluded after taking a large bite of her ice cream. Kim stared at her bewildered for a moment. She supposed it would make sense, but it really didn’t in her mind. She didn’t think that Steve was lying about this.

“I think you’re full of it.” Kim laughed, taking a bite of her ice cream and savoring the mint feeling on her tongue. She watched her friends' eyes glaze over, looking at someone behind her as Kim continued to eat. She ignored it, figuring she had zoned out and focused on someone else.

“Don’t look- I said don’t look,” Addi huffed out as Kim began to look over her shoulder. Kim froze her movements, looking at her friend bewildered. Addi sighed out dramatically, “What happened to Jason Carver?” His name alone caused chills to grow along her spine and her demeanor to change. She felt very scared suddenly.

“What do you mean?” She dropped her spoon in her ice cream bowl and laid her hands under her thighs so they wouldn’t shake. Addi glanced over Kim’s shoulder again, giving her head a soft nudge in that direction. Kim turned slowly, pretending to be looking elsewhere but her eyes immediately landed upon the blonde jock. She felt her jaw go slack, staring at how black and blue his face was. His left eye was almost completely shut and he had a large gash across his nose. Her eyes wandered down, noticing the cast that held his arm in place.

She must’ve stared for too long because Chrissy looked up from the sundae that she was sharing with him and gave her such a dirty look that Kim feared she may drop dead from it. She turned quickly, feeling her veins grow cold as she feared how they’d both react. Whatever Jason had told Chrissy about her, hadn’t been good.

“Ouch,” She muttered out as Addi waited for her reaction. Her hair dipped in front of her face and she fought the urge to fiddle with it. Addi took a large bite from her ice cream, still staring at the couple unsuspecting, “I hope he’s okay.” She sounded lame as she spoke, realizing she couldn’t care less if he was okay or not.

“I wonder what happened?” Addi finally drew her eyes away and Kim shifted, fearing Jason would come and confront her. She licked her bottom lip and shrugged, suddenly feeling as if her stomach were filled with stones.

The truth was, she knew exactly what happened. Billy’s bruised knuckles and comment about fighting made perfect sense now. Her mouth felt dry as she thought about it more. He had snapped Jason’s hand for her.

“I think I know,” She responded meekly. She wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to bring the event into existence again but she was tired of always having to hide things from her friend. Addi perked up as she watched Kim search for the words, “Billy. He mentioned getting into a fight.” Kim whispered quietly and then stopped to drink her water cup, turning a bit curious as her friend didn’t question her anymore.

“What?” Addi raised her eyebrows at the odd look Kim was shooting her. Kim looked at her exasperated.

“What do you mean, what? Don’t you want to know why?” She emphasized why, knowing well enough that her and Addi were always ones to enjoy watching drama from the background. Addi smiled at her sheepishly.

“Sorry, I didn’t realize there was more to the story. It just sounded like something Billy would do.” Addi admitted as she twirled her straw through her ice. Kim frowned and knew well enough that it was completely fair to think that Billy would do such a thing. However, it also irritated her that Addi thought of Billy in that fashion.

“He’s not a bad guy,” Kim found herself defending him. She didn’t know why it was bothering her so badly. She knew how Billy was, how he presented himself. Addi brought her eyebrows together, “He’s just- complicated.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you had grown so close to him,” Addi laughed awkwardly, “I just meant that this isn’t the first person that Billy has beat senseless. I didn’t expect there to actually be a story.” Kim felt her face growing warm, knowing she had acted out rashly. She should’ve bit back her comment, but it was too late now to backpedal.

“It’s not that,” Kim said quickly, “I’m sorry. Neil has just been really hard on him lately and I guess I just got defensive.” She shook it off, trying to ignore the way her friend was watching her with calculating eyes. She felt nervous as she took another large scoop of her ice cream and placed it on her tongue, inviting the chill feeling on her tongue.

“It’s okay,” Addi finally responded, glancing back over Kim’s shoulder as she looked towards the couple again, “So, why did he do it then?” Kim felt her mind spinning for a second, understanding suddenly why she had been so brash in defending Billy. She gulped hard, keeping her voice low and soft as she began her story.

“It’s not a lot, maybe it’s nothing at all. I don’t know,” Kim began to ramble, still feeling unsure of herself, “He was holding my wrist and wouldn’t let me leave while his friend was pulling my dress up.” She furrowed her eyebrows, trying to make sure she was recollecting the events right. She felt a bit insecure as she spoke, thinking about Chrissy’s harsh glare and wondering if she had misinterpreted the events. Addi’s jaw went slack as she stared at her in shock for a moment before sliding her hand across the table and squeezing Kim’s.

“I’m so sorry that happened to you. That ass deserved it, Billy was right for what he did.” Kim was a bit taken aback that she agreed so easily. Nonetheless, she was happy that she had Addi’s support as she squeezed her hand back. It made her feel a little less crazy about everything that had happened, and that she was valid in her emotions.

“I’m over it. I just, I didn’t really want him to say anything about what happened. I was hoping by staying quiet it would go away.” She mumbled. That’s what she tried to do with most of her problems, ignore them until they worked themselves out. She wanted to believe the problem with Jason would be the same.

“Honey, I don’t think it would have gone away like that,” Addi gave her a timid smile, moving her hand away and linking her own fingers together, “I think he should’ve been put in his place. If people don’t believe you, well that’s on them. Fuck them,” Addi grinned widely after her small talk. Kim laughed, trying to make herself feel better, “Honestly, I think that he’ll be too scared to say anything anyways.”

“Probably,” Kim cracked a small smile, thinking about it. She wondered if Tommy would take back what he said now, about not being afraid of Billy. She still thought he was dumb for saying that, especially now with the state Jason was in. She wondered if Billy had found the other guy too, “I just don’t like causing any issues.”

“You’re not the one causing issues by not wanting some creeps to look under your dress,” Addi told her honestly, “You’re okay though?” She asked softly, looking genuinely worried as she watched her friend. Kim nodded, a bit stiff but it was true. It still bothered her a lot, but it made her feel better that she had some people in her corner.

“I’m fine. I promise,” Kim smiled kindly at her. She appreciated Addi checking in on her and she slowly began to finish the last few bites of her ice cream, “Thank you.” She bit her lip as she began to wonder how bad her next year of high school would be without Billy. Jason was in the same grade as her and she doubted he’d leave her alone with Billy not there. It was quiet for a moment before Kim spoke again.

“Do you think Eddie could drop me off at the pool when he gets back? I just need to ask Billy something.” She responded. She needed to know why he had decided to do something when she had asked him not to do it. She didn’t understand why he had to make a big deal out of something when she was partially sure that Jason and his friend wouldn’t have done anything. Still, Addi seemed to agree that his actions were correct. Addi looked at her through thick eyelashes.

“Yeah, I don’t think he’d mind. I take that back, don’t take too long. He has his campaign tonight.” Kim nodded, unsure of what that meant but she accepted it as she thought of what she would say to the blonde boy.

///////

“Thanks for the ride,” Kim was quick to pull herself out of the van, her legs slightly shaking from nerves. She couldn’t tell if Eddie was that bad of a driver or was too distracted with everything else going on that he just constantly swerved, “I’ll be back in a few.”

“Take your time,” Addi smiled kindly but Eddie shot her an irritated look, saying otherwise as she sighed, “Okay don’t take your time. He’s got to prep for tonight.” Addi changed her answer and Kim nodded, smiling again at Eddie. She appreciated how he had been driving them around lately, and had tried to convince him that it was okay for him to hang out around them as well. He simply laughed, saying he had different interests and that was okay. She was surprised but Addi seemed to agree with him.

Kim had decided, once again, that she really wanted a boyfriend.

She made haste towards the entrance, not wanting to wait any longer. They had sat in Scoops Ahoy for far too long while Kim waited for Jason and Chrissy to finally leave. She had been so worried that they would confront her, or try to jump her when they left. She felt she was irrational but also partially correct in the same manner. She was going to tell Billy that it wasn’t her decision to make and that was really freaking her out. She wasn’t used to being the one to be straightforward. It made her nervous and she was trying to not vomit from her nerves.

She looked around as she stepped inside the pool area. There was a crowd as usual as the sound of screaming children and laughter surrounded her. She peered up at the tower, noticing Heather was sitting in it and not Billy. She sighed, not able to pick him through the crowd and made her way towards the tower. She did her best to stay away from the pool to keep from being splashed.

Kim approached Heather cautiously, suddenly wondering if Jason had said anything to her the same way that he had already told Chrissy. She felt a wave of relief when the smaller brunette smiled kindly at her, “Have you seen Billy?” Kim twisted her fingers together, waiting for her to respond. Heather leaned away from the table, thinking for a moment as she pushed her sunglasses up on top of her head.

“He went to break a few minutes ago. I think he headed towards the storage room, do you need my key?” Kim shook her head softly. She felt a jolt of electricity in her stomach as she remembered the last time she barged in on him and felt a wave of heat when she thought of why he had been doing it. She tried to keep a straight face as she spoke.

“No it’s okay. I’ll just knock and see if he answers. Thank you though.” Kim waved at the girl kindly as she headed down the cool hallway. She didn’t like to admit that it creeped her out a bit, looking so dark and grim compared to the bright sun shining outside. She found that she didn’t even need to knock, as the door was already partially opened. Her words failed her as she peaked inside, looking at where Karen Wheeler had her tiny frame pushed up against Billy.

Something in his stance felt off as Kim watched for a moment. He was trying to make an excuse about something as Karen’s manicured hand pulled on his whistle, dangling him closer to her. Kim was surprised to see the other woman acting so seductive at the moment. Of course, she had noticed how Karen would stare at Billy but she never imagined the other woman would actually try to pull a move on him. She didn’t want to see where their conversation was headed, already traumatized from this room.

Kim cleared her throat after another second, the two that were interlinked quickly snapped their eyes up to look at her startled. Karen quickly pushed herself off of Billy, sending the boy stumbling back against the metal racks. Kim blinked for a moment as he appeared frazzled, looking as if he had been caught redhanded.

“Hey, uh,” She searched for her words, watching at how Billy kept trying to put a larger distance between him and the blonde woman, “I just wanted to ask you something but I see you’re busy. I’ll come back later.” She muttered as she tucked her hair away from her face. Karen was looking frazzled as she glanced at Kim and Billy. Kim found it sort of funny she had the decency to look so horrified at her actions when she had been flirting and ogling at Billy the whole summer.

“No,” Billy’s cheeks were pink as he stared at her with widened blue eyes, “You can ask me now. Come on, let’s go back. Mrs. Wheeler was just inquiring about swimming lessons.” Billy brushed it off quickly, his usual smooth demeanor was sloppy and awkward. Kim found herself not caring that much if he wanted to get himself mixed up with a married woman. Somehow, it was less upsetting to her than him being around the girls her age. She was curious if that was because she knew he’d never actually be able to be with Karen, who was married with children.

“Since when do you do adult swimming lessons?” She found herself asking as she tilted her head, full of curiosity and innocence. Karen’s eyes widened as she shifted awkwardly on her feet before looking at the redhead again.

“If you’ll excuse me, I better get back to my daughter. Um, thank you Billy for suggesting those swimming lessons for Holly. I’m sure she’d love that.” Karen looked too flushed and fumbled over her words as she walked away from Kim quickly. Kim bit her lip, fighting back the urge to laugh as she caught into their lie. Billy looked less than amused as his bruised fingers cupped his good fist and popped his knuckles loudly. She glanced up at him, the teasing inside of her fading as she remembered why she had come to speak to him.

“Can we go talk out back?” Billy moved his hands to fidget with his whistle that hung over his black tank top. She shrugged her shoulders, stepping out of the doorway as she followed him outside. She had to jog a bit to keep up with his long strides and hoped he wasn’t irritated that she had caught them. In her defense, he had left the door open for anyone to see. It wasn’t her fault.

“You and Mrs. Wheeler then?” Her tone was playful as she asked it, stepping back into the hot sun. She covered her eyes, slightly blinded by how bright it was outside. The warm air wrapped her in a hug and she wondered how Billy could be barefoot at the moment when she could feel the heat from the cement rising into her sandals. He sighed.

“That’s not what it looked like,” Billy rushed out as he lit a cigarette and quickly pulled it up to his lips. He exhaled quickly, bouncing his foot as he leaned against the stoned wall and spoke to her, “You know that right?” He sounded like it was urgent that she understood, but she simply raised an eyebrow as she watched him twitch next to her. She wondered how many he’d need to smoke until he calmed down again.

“I mean, it’s not really any of my business is it?” She laughed softly, confused as to why he was trying to brush his encounter off with Karen. He had made such a big deal before that he could be with whomever he pleased so she didn’t see why he had to explain anything to her. He faltered for a moment, exhaling rather deeply as he blew out a large cloud of smoke.

“I was supposed to meet with her a while ago, like almost two weeks I think,” He paused as he inhaled more smoke. She tilted her head, watching how his brows furrowed together and seemed bothered by it, “It never happened and now she won’t leave me alone. I’m trying to be polite about it but she’s about to turn me into an ass.” Billy finished, sighing out irritably. Kim was surprised by his response. She couldn’t imagine why Billy wouldn’t be interested in Karen. She seemed to fall into everything that he desired.

“What changed your mind?” She asked softly, feeling bad for the way he was treated by the adult women. She had always thought it was weird, but now it just felt disgusting to her. Especially since Karen wouldn’t leave him alone now. He chuckled, finally turning his blue eyes to look at her. She stared at the new freckles that danced off of his cheeks, knowing that they would fade away by the end of the day.

“Someone I know ate a shit ton of pot brownies and I had to babysit.” He grinned, shaking his head as his blonde curls danced with the motion. She felt flames licking at her cheeks as she watched him put his cigarette out and light a new one. She couldn’t believe it had been that long since that situation happened. God, she was still so embarrassed that it had even happened.

“Oh God,” She played with her hair, leaning against the hot wall with him. She tried not to wince as the stones burned against her pale skin, “That’s who you were going to see that night?” She strained her voice to not sound too judgemental but it was obvious she failed when she heard her own tone. She opened her mouth, trying to think of a way to phrase her question differently but Billy simply shrugged.

“I was bored I guess and she was interested. I thought it would be fun,” Kim knew that Mrs. Wheeler wouldn’t have been the first older woman who Billy had been with. She didn’t quite believe his truth but she didn’t pry for anymore information, “I guess you saved me from that mess.” Kim didn’t know what to say.

“She’s still bothering you though?” Kim felt like she could relate a bit as she thought of Tommy. However, it wasn’t like he was showing up to her workplace everyday and staring at her. She started to feel guilty as she always thought that Billy had liked the attention from the other females. Now, she understood differently.

“I’m just that irresistible,” Billy smirked and Kim felt her eyes roll all the way back in her head. He laughed hard, smoking pouring from his lips as he did so. She wondered how he was able to handle it when she felt her lungs straining from being this near to the smoke, “Eh, it’s whatever. I applied as an apprentice at the car garage.” He shifted the conversation quickly so she couldn’t ask him anymore. She bit back her apology for how the older woman was treating him. She smiled in surprise.

“That’s great, Billy,” She responded, her hand instantly going to squeeze his hand without her processing it. She resisted the urge to kick the side of the building as his face changed to discomfort. She let their hands go quickly, understanding that it was her way of showing her support but remembering that Billy wasn’t one for physical touch, “Really, that’s awesome. You’re great with cars, they’d be stupid not to hire you.” She reassured him, knowing how true it was. He had spent his summer before they moved to Hawkins fixing up his current car that he had bought for cheap. All of the details that she had heard guys gush over when referencing it had been made from his own blood, sweat and tears.

“Yeah,” He flexed his dangling hand into a fist and then rubbed his fingers together, “I probably won’t get it but it’s better than working at some restaurant. No offense.” He glanced at her quickly. She smiled in agreement.

“You’d probably get some good tips though,” She teased softly. Billy looked down at her amused, moving closer to her as her heart began to swell. She suddenly remembered why she had come here in the first place as she drew his bruised knuckles back into her line of sight, “Jason. I saw him today.” Billy slid away slowly, blowing out a large puff of smoke as he looked at her plainly.

“And?” He pulled his cigarette away from his lips and examined it. She gulped hard, trying to find the right thing to say. She didn’t want to say the wrong thing to him as she searched through her mind. She had come here to demand that he tell her what happened but she already knew. There wasn’t a need to confirm it. She had been so upset earlier, thinking about how hard Jason would be on her next school year. She realized it wouldn’t matter regardless. If Billy didn’t do anything he may have run his mouth anyways or done worse, knowing that Billy wouldn’t have stood up for her.

“Thank you,” She breathed out slowly and he turned to her in surprise again. She played with her hair as he observed her, “I appreciate you for defending me.” She mumbled out, glancing down towards her sandals and then back up at him. He was grinning.

“You don’t have to thank me for doing that. I should’ve cut his tiny dick off,” Billy grumbled, finishing his second cigarette finally. She hoped she hadn’t worked him up again to need another one, “However, if you do want to thank me you could do so on your knees.” He responded slyly. It took her a second to think of what she could do on her knees before her face flushed again. She shoved at his shoulder, scoffing at his loud laughter.

“You’re so gross.” She groaned as he pulled her wrists towards his torso. He grinned, leaning down towards her face. They were too close for how siblings should be standing. There were implications that she recognized as he traced his thumb across her soft skin, earning goosebumps from her.

“Am I?” He was dangerously close to her and she looked to see how bright his blue eyes looked with the sun reflecting off of them. They reminded her of the ocean suddenly and she found herself lingering in his hold as he removed his hands from her wrists and brought them up to cup her face. Her heart was hammering harshly in her chest, the fear of someone seeing them taking over as she looked at him urgently.

“Not here, Billy,” She breathed out, tasting the smoke from his mouth on her lips, “Someone could see.” Her voice was hoarse as she spoke. The truth was that she really didn’t want him to pull away but she knew it was the correct thing to say.

“So?” She was floored when he said that, her eyes widening. He tilted his head to the side as he watched her expression, obviously looking amused at how fearful she looked. He slowly dropped his hands from her face but stayed close to her as he spoke, “Can’t be the worst thing that people think of me.” She frowned, not liking how bitter he sounded about himself. She remembered how he spoke of his mother yesterday and hated how he blamed himself for so much he didn’t have control over.

She raised off of the wall, her pale arm red from leaning against it, and pressed a kiss to the corner of his lips. He looked at her surprised before he leaned down closer to her, their noses barely touching, “Hey, Billy.” The door slammed open and Kim jumped back like a scared cat and was sure her hair had risen in the same manner. Billy turned, looking over his shoulder as Heather walked out. She motioned to the watch on her wrist.

“Break time is over,” Heather noticed Kim and smiled at her again, “Sorry, but I can’t take much more before I start pulling my hair out.” Kim was resisting the urge to pull at her skin as she was worried that Heather had seen something. It was obvious she hadn’t though as she held the door open for the two of them. Billy nodded, throwing his cigarette away.

“Sure,” His response was calm as he looked over his shoulder and waited for Kim to follow him. She moved quickly, smiling again at the shorter girl as she passed, and following behind Billy. She grew chill quickly as the dark, cool hallway took away the warmth from the sun, “Do you need a ride back? You could wait until tonight. I could take you to the house after closing.” Kim looked at him surprised.

“Oh, I actually have Addi waiting for me,” She mumbled as she thought of her friend, probably wondering what the hell had happened to her, “Unless she left me already. It’s okay, I’ll see you tonight?” She thought he looked slightly disappointed at first but it was quickly gone as he observed her again and sent her a cheeky grin.

“Well, if she has left you can stay here anyways,” His fingers cupped her chin before they stepped out, she could just barely see the light from the sun shining down the hallway. She glanced away quickly, looking back into his bright eyes, “Maybe you can drive my car back?” She felt her eyes widening, a bit scared of the thought.

“You’re serious about teaching me to drive?” He nodded, looking very enthused. She smiled nervously, nodding as she promised to do what he had asked. She couldn’t picture Addi leaving without her, however. Something about the way that Heather had almost caught them had Kim pulling apart from Billy. He seemed a bit surprised but not in a way that it bothered him. She smiled nervously as she waited for him to answer.

“Yeah, are you off tomorrow?” He began to walk out into the sun again and she followed him, absorbing the heat as she had begun to grow cold. She glanced over, trying not to glare as she watched the group of moms instantly swarm their eyes towards him. He didn’t seem bothered as he pulled out a piece of gum.

“Yeah, why?” She asked, confused. He gave her a look as he chewed on his gum and she felt her eyebrows raising as she realized, “Oh, oh okay we can start tomorrow then?” She tried to sound happy about it but she really wasn’t. She didn’t want him to scream at her the same way Neil had or for him to be nervous and freaking out in the passenger seat like her mom had been. She hoped it would be a good experience.

“You’ll do great,” Billy’s lips curled into a grin and she watched how the sunlight seemed to bounce off of him. Her eyes trailed over the curve of his face as she realized his bruises were completely gone at this point. It made her feel good that he no longer carried Neil’s act of violence on the outside of his body, “You think too much. Just don’t think.” He reminded her and she wanted to respond that it was easier said than done. She felt awkward as they began to drift apart. She found herself urging to wrap her arms around his torso and hug him, really thanking him for all he had done. She knew he was hot headed at times and said things he didn’t mean, but she still appreciated what he had done for her.

“Thank you,” She smiled softly, feeling an odd feeling grow in her chest as he smiled a genuine smile at her. She could feel her heart racing and wondered what this meant. She shook the thoughts away quickly, turning on her heel as she headed back to the parking lot. Eddie’s van was still parked in the same spot and she could hear the loud music blaring as she approached. Still, she considered telling them lies about how she needed to stay and let Billy drive her back. She liked being in his company and wanted more of it, “Sorry it took so long.” She said quickly as she hopped into the backseat.

“No biggie,” Eddie responded, blowing out a thick cloud of smoke as he handed his cigarette towards Addi. Kim felt betrayed for a split second, not knowing that her friend had taken up smoking. She felt slightly relieved when Addi’s face grew into disgust and she put it out, “Hey I was still smoking.” He whined as he hurriedly reversed the van. Kim shut her eyes quickly again, fearing that he would hit one of the other parked cars.

“Sorry, you gave the nasty thing to me,” Was Addi’s response as she pointed the AC vents towards her again, “It’s so hot outside.” Addi whined. Kim agreed it was hot, but preferred it over getting cold. She thought of how different Billy was in that department than her. He was always hot. She had thought she was going to die during the winter, never experiencing it being quite so cold and wet before. She had worn layers and layers to school to keep from freezing while Billy kept his usual attire of unbuttoned shirts and his leather jacket. No matter how cold it got, he refused to dress for comfort. There had been a few incidents where he had forced Max to start his car and warm it up while they waited inside the school in the warmth. He never made it seem like the cold bothered him though, but she knew well enough.

She found her thoughts wandering as Eddie and Addi began to talk about some game she didn’t understand. She thought of Billy again and wondered why he had been so adamant in telling her that Mrs. Wheeler and him did not have something going on. He had never defended that before and she couldn’t tell if he was just so disgusted in the older woman's actions or if there was more than he was telling her.

She fought back a smile as she looked out the window, catching her reflection. She looked too joyous, she thought. Her cheeks pink and her small dimples poking out as her lips kept curling higher into a smile. She hoped her friend couldn’t see her at the moment because she was sure she would spill her guts to Addi if she asked. She wanted to talk about Billy the way Addi was able to talk about Eddie but she knew that was a faraway dream. Addi would be disgusted with her if she knew and Billy would never agree with his name being thrown around in that manner. She felt like she had popped her own bubble but she ignored her own thoughts as she lingered in the happy ones. Everyday she felt less guilty about what she was doing and who she was doing it with. She wasn’t sure what that meant about her own mental state but she brushed that aside as well.

She found herself excited to get home and search through her closet to pick out something cute to wear tomorrow. She wasn’t sure why she wanted to impress Billy so badly again but she did. She liked how they were now and not when they were fighting. She hoped it would stay that way.

Next Chapter

#Billy Hargrove x OC #Billy Hargrove smut #Billy Hargrove stepcest #tw stepcest #tw pseudocest #Billy Hargrove #Cruel Summer

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outstandingblue · 1 year

Text

Promises to Keep

Four - Weak in the Knees

recom!miles quaritch x fem!na’vi oc

part four! honestly didn’t expect to write this for at least a week, but here she is!

The southern charm may work on some, but it doesn't work on all.

find it on ao3 here

content warning: pretty tame this chapter. mostly being unconscious

word count: 2.3k

Pain was the first thing Jiniraa felt waking up. She was accustomed to a certain level of constant discomfort, but this was beyond what she was used to. Groaning, she opened her eyes but instantly regretted that decision, bringing a hand up to protect her eyes from the bright artificial light coming from above.

Where the fuck am I? She thought to herself, trying to search her brain for the last thing she could remember.

The forest. Military Avatars. Captured. Running. Explosion. Slip and fall. After that, it was all dark after that. She must’ve been unconscious after hitting the ground. The memories slowly began to trickle back and she looked down at herself, surveying the surface injuries.

She was no longer completely covered in blood and mud, but she also wasn’t completely clean either. She flexed all her fingers, wincing when certain joints popped louder than normal. There was a respirator mask attached to her face. Having the mask strapped around her head was a foreign feeling, so she reached up to slide it off; she preferred to only breathe into it when needed.

She began to sit up when she noticed someone standing outside a clear door. He punched in the code, letting the door slide open with a hiss. She watched as he bent down through the open door before training his eyes on the smaller woman laying across the table.

“‘Bout time you woke up.” He brought his respirator towards his face, taking a quick sip of air, “started to worry you died, darlin’.”

She just bared her teeth at him, refusing to engage with his charismatic and flirtatious nature.

“Aw, you’re hurtin’ my feelings.” He smirked down at Jiniraa. He had been waiting on the other side of the one-way mirror for almost half a day. There were a few times he sent one of the lab coats in to check she was still breathing and hadn’t actually died.

“Where am I?” Jiniraa’s ears fell flat against her head.

Although she didn’t completely trust her legs to hold her up, she felt too vulnerable sitting on the table, much too small against the built man in front of her. Quaritch’s eyebrow quipped watching the Na’vi slide herself off the table. As she expected, her legs completely gave out upon touching the cold metal ground.

It was a flash of blue and before Jiniraa knew it, an arm was wrapped around her back and her front was pressed up against the Colonel. She didn’t want to acknowledge how her heart rate picked up in excitement - she had never been this close to a male before.

“Woah there, you took one hell of a fall. You should just stay sittin’,' ' Quaritch smirked down at Jiniraa, attempting to get a rise out of her. “I normally don’t find myself in this position with prisoners.”

Quaritch lifted her up with ease, setting her back down on the table. Jiniraa took the opportunity to hiss and wiggle herself out of his grip.

With narrowed eyes she asked, “where am I?”

“A prison cell. You know, I’ve had a lot of women going weak in the knees from me. They normally aren’t mean to me right after.” Quaritch replied offhandedly, loving how the Na’vi’s eye twitched in annoyance. “Now, where did you learn English?”

“I asked a question first,” she ignored the question at hand.

“And I am the one in charge.” He lifted his respirator back up to his face, taking another quick sip of air. “At least tell me your name.”

No response. Quaritch was beginning to get annoyed, hating being stonewalled by the woman in front of him.

Instead, he shot out his hand towards the woman. She instinctively flinched back from the sudden movement, eyes widening and looking for danger.

“I ain’t gonna hurt you sweetheart,” he reached to grab her hand resting on the table, “the name is Colonel Miles Quaritch. Now, I gave you mine, you give me yours.”

Colonel Miles fucking Quaritch. Jiniraa knew exactly who that was. He was responsible for the destruction of Hometree. For the death of her loved ones. The reason her people lost their way of life.

“Well, technically I’m not _the _Colonel Quaritch,” she watched as he bent down into a squat, resting his giant hands on his knees. “But I am equipped with his memories and skill. New and improved.”

Jiniraa turned the reality of the situation over in her head. If she continued to resist, there was nothing stopping him from just killing her. She had to give a little if she was going to survive. She needed to survive, escape with Spider and return home.

“Jiniraa,” she responded in a quiet voice.

“Jeniraa,” he tested the name out on his own tongue.

“Jiniraa,” she corrected in annoyance.

“Hmm. Jiniraa.” Her name sounded nice coming from him.

“Where am I?” She repeated her first question.

“Well,” he grunted as he returned to his full height, as imposing as ever, “we’re at an RDA compound. You know who they are?” She nodded, eyes narrowed. “I’m hoping you’ll willingly help me and my unit out with our mission. Spider already agreed to ride along.”

He watched as her ears jumped to full attention. He smirked at her reaction, knowing he could use whatever relationship they had against the two of them.

“Where is Spider?”

“Oh, he’s fine. He’s resting in his holding cell. The science pukes interrogated him for a while then turned him over to me. Speaking of which, we have somewhere to be.”

He gripped her upper arm, pulling her to her feet before she could share her reservations.

Once she was standing on her feet, she was able to fully take in how massive the man in front of her was. She was shorter than most Na’vi women her age, but she didn’t expect the top of her head to just barely reach his chin.

In exchange for height, Jiniraa had more muscle mass and curves than the long and lean women of her clan. She used to dislike the way her body was different from the other women, but with age she grew to love the sensuality her body had. Her delicate features combined with her soft body made her absolutely stunning.

Her bare feet padded quietly against the floor, a complete juxtaposition to the loud clambering of her guide. She attempted to make a mental map of the route they took, already planning her eventual escape, but it was impossible. Everything was made of metal. There were no memorable landmarks. No windows. Worst of all, they made turn after turn, completely impossible for Jinraa to follow along.

A second set of boots joined the pair. Jiniraa recognized him from the forest, the bald one. Lyle.

“She finally woke up boss?” He asked, falling right into step on the other side of Jiniraa. She was sandwiched in between the two men, both much larger than herself.

“Yeah, actually thought she was dead.” Miles responded back, talking over Jiniraa’s head.

Eventually the trio reached their destination. Jiniraa felt sick to her stomach at the scene in front of her. It actually was a good thing Miles was holding onto her arm because her legs began to give out in fear.

Inside the circular room, there were only humans. Almost all wore pristine white lab coats - scientists. None of them had the nerve to look the men beside her in the eyes, but they looked over towards her, curious.

There was one woman, waiting in the center of the room dressed in a military uniform.

“It’s about time, Colonel. I was about to go looking for you myself.”

“I do apologize, General. I had to wait for the prisoner to wake up. She’s ready now.” Jiniraa noticed how his posture immediately went rigid. There was no more fooling around in his voice and the smirk had dropped from his face. It was all business now.

“Alright, let’s get to it. Strap her down.” The woman - the General - took a step back, motioning towards the torture device behind her.

Jiniraa resisted as best she could. She thrashed around, but she was easily overpowered by Miles. He forced her down against the machine, holding her down as Lyle secured the restraints around her. Before stepping back, Miles allowed her to get one last sip of air before stepping back, allowing the General to assume his place.

“Get anything outta her,” Lyle asked, his back facing the Na’vi as the General began her interrogation. She started off easy, not turning on the machine just yet, giving her a chance.

“Her name is Jiniraa. That’s it.” Miles crossed his arms, circling around the holotable in front of him, waiting for the projection to load.

“The General should break her,” Lyle responded, leaning against a cabinet.

“Didn’t work with the kid, Spider. I hope she cracks easier. We don’t have all day. Sully is probably on the move as we speak.”

The two turned their attention towards the General and the prisoner.

“You don’t answer my questions and I have to start using new tactics. You aren’t going to like it.” Jiniraa refused to give anything up. She wouldn’t even give the woman satisfaction of looking into her eyes. “Alright, you asked for it.”

The General leaned down and pressed a button, starting the machine up. Jiniraa’s eyes widened in fear as it began to pick up speed.

Miles and Lyle pulled their attention away from the prisoner towards the lab coats circling around their legs.

“Tell me something. Anything and this’ll stop.” The General raised her voice, making sure Jiniraa could hear her over the grinding metal around her.

“No!” She gritted back.

Scientists watched as different sectors of her brain began to light up, perfectly in time with her responses.

“Well that’s interesting,” one of the doctors muttered underneath his breath.

“What is,” Miles bent down towards the man. Lyle followed suit. “Don’t give me the fucking medical mumbo jumbo.”

“Well if you look right around here,” he motioned towards an area completely overtaken with activity, “this is the prefrontal cortex. Hers is abnormally large and based on the activity, she seems to be in immense pain. Probably constantly.”

Miles watched as she continued to resist the General’s questions, giving the General even less than Spider.

The doctor continued, “and if you look here, this is the part of the brain that deals with emotions. Her’s is larger as well. She’s probably a deeply and passionately emotional person.”

Lyle and Miles shared a look, knowing they could use that information against the Na’vi for their benefit. Miles hummed in response, taking a sip from his respirator once again.

“Just one second. Think of the stronghold for one second. All of this would be over immediately. Tell me where Jake Sully and his family are. Do that and I’ll make all of this stop.”

Jiniraa continued to resist, gritting her teeth together to refrain from screaming out in pain.

Miles watched as the interrogation continued for ten minutes, Jiniraa continued to give nothing up. The General’s frustration was at her boiling point, but she attempted to maintain composure.

“Oh no.”

Miles' head snapped down towards the science puke from earlier. Tail flicking to the side and ears pinned flat.

“What.” He growled out, grabbing the attention of Lyle as well. His second-in-command tended to be a silent observer rather than active participant, taking in the situation and thinking of different courses of action.

“Her heart rate is climbing way too high. Her brain is going to starve itself if the General keeps this up.”

Miles looked back over towards Jiniraa, watching as her eyes began to flutter to the back of her head. The General didn’t seem to notice - or care. Miles had already interrupted one interrogation today; he didn't want to interrupt another and claim a spot at the top of the General’s shit list.

If he didn’t intervene, she could die. If she dies, Spider definitely wouldn’t help.

In a split second decision, Miles took long strides across the lab, hitting the bright red button to halt the interview. The General slowly turned, mouth agape towards the Colonel. Eyes twitched at the absolute audacity of the recombinant.

“Colonel?” Her lips tightened together. Miles looked past the General towards Jiniraa. Her body seemed completely limp against the slab, the only sign of life was the quick rise and fall of her chest. “Explain yourself. Now.”

“General, the lab coats said she was at risk of going brain dead from the interrogation. If we lose her, we lose the kid as well. A dead Na’vi is the last thing we need right now.”

“Is that so?” He gave a tight nod to the General. She narrowed her eyes, trying to see through him. “Fine.”

As she stepped away, Miles took two large strides towards Jiniraa, motioning for Lyle to come over as well.

He raised her respirator up to her face once more, holding it there as Lyle undid the rest of the straps. She was barely conscious, falling limp into Miles’ grip.

“Woah there, sweetheart.” Her skin was clammy against his own, too pale to be considered healthy. He raised two fingers to her throat, feeling for her pulse, he felt relieved as it slowly began to slow down and the color returned to her face.

In her delirious state, Jiniraa didn’t realize whose grasp she was in. Her normal personality began to take over. That of kindness and affection.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, eyes still closed. Her voice was stripped of the hostility he experienced earlier. Miles felt his head tilting to the side as he observed the woman in his arms.

“Boss?” Lyle’s voice snapped Miles out of his haze, “we taking her back?”

“What? Yeah. She needs to rest. We’ll talk to her when she wakes up again. No more of this.”

I can’t let her die. He thought to himself. It’s for the sake of the mission. Obviously for the mission.

Next: Five - Pinky Promises

●●●

i appreciate any feedback anyone has to offer. i haven’t written any sort of fiction in years, so let me know how i can improve :)

#colonel miles quaritch #miles quaritch #miles quaritch x oc #miles quaritch imagine #avatar x oc #avatar imagine #avatar #avatar the way of water #avatar oc #lyle wainfleet #colonel quaritch #recom wainfleet #recom quaritch #recom quaritch x oc #promises to keep

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fleshdyke · 1 year

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TELL ME ABOUT THE GHOSTS

there is so much shit in my brain abt them that’s probably never going to leave procreate or my notes app. i could write essays abt kitty and her family and thomas and his death and robin and the moon and mary and annie and like everything going on with cap yk. like it’s just so many tragedies wrapped up in a comedy and that’s like my favourite type of media. kitty was a scapegoat for her sister and father and her innocence/naïveté despite being a grown woman stemming from neurodivergence and her brain’s defense mechanisms to see all her memories through rose tinted glasses so she can’t be hurt any more by them. thomas wasn’t a great poet and was kinda annoying that’s pretty evident but like he spent the entirety of his last day alive being mocked and bullied by people that barely tried to hide it. his death was a public spectacle, everyone at the party coming to watch the duel but not a single person sticking around as he died. he died alone and all because his cousin wanted to live in a big house. and he was (and remains) so desperate for someone to love bc he just thinks that’s how it should be. i’m also a huge aromantic thomas truther. robin has been dead for 22,000 years at least and the only thing, the one and only thing that has stayed constant is the moon. stars have blinked out and moved in the sky and the ice age ended and thousands of people lived and died where he was and hundreds of houses were built and torn down and he’s watched everyone he knows come and go. but the moon was worshipped when he was alive as well, and it was the only thing that stayed. he’s watched language evolve and stopped going by his original name and he’s lost so many people. but he assigns them each a star because the night sky was the most important thing to his culture when he was alive. and he remembers each and every one. mary was only really happy for three or so years of her life because she actually loved her husband before he was killed. she lived for however many more years after that alone and dealing with the conditions women faced in the 15th century and then was picked to blame for the crops failing. she faced a devastating tragedy when her husband died, lived the rest of her life as a widowed peasant woman, and was just a little weird (autism). so they killed her. she died in pretty much the most painful way you can die, and then was pretty much alone for centuries because she was still so caught up in the restrictions of her life. but when annie died in front of her and immediately started cursing out the men that treated her so horribly in life. annie was her first friend since her husband. and then annie moved on and mary was left alone again. cap is so closed off and i think he knows that he’s gay but just refuses to admit it because he’s scared. he’s still so stuck in the mindset from the war and being the leader of the button house base that he’s just learned not to think about it. and the one time he gathered the courage to possibly say something about it, he got interrupted. he’s not planning on ever admitting it because he’s scared. i have too many emotions about this man to ever properly put it into words so it’s like completely incomprehensible but ohhh my god i feel insane sometimes yk.

#thoughts abt how cap died are in my head 24/7 btw #i can’t remember if they ever said when robin and mary died so im just going off educated guesses #asks #long post #bbc ghosts

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hi-i-love-u-bitch · 7 months

Text

I got sucked into the Amazing Digital Circus fandom and this is the result of my intense brain rot! 🫠

Name: Jiffy

Age: 22 yrs

Pronouns: She/her

Likes: Sweets, animals, music

Dislikes: Heights, dishonesty, Caine

More info about her under the cut 🫶

*When she first entered the Digital Circus, it was very frantic and distressed, begging them to help her find someone.

*Who that was she couldn't remember, which seems to distress her even more than potentially being trapped in a digital world forever.

*It is very, very obvious at first glance that she and Jax have some sort of connection, they just don't know what, nor do the others.

*Gangle had at first suggested long lost lovers (as Kinger and Queenie had been the same sort of "species" when they had first entered the digital world together).

*That theory was rejected almost immediately because, for some reason, the mere suggestion of that absolutely disgusted Jax and Jiffy.

*Caine seemed to know why and looked visibly excited about it too, but he refused to tell them. Saying how it would "Spoil the fun of figuring out the mystery yourselves!"

*That really, really pisses off Jiffy, so from day one Caine was on her shit list.

*Jax does not like the whole situation at all, it makes him feel and think about things that he hasn't felt or thought about for a long time.

*Jiffy hates how much of an asshole Jax is, constantly scolding him to quit his shit and be nicer to his friends. It frustrates her that no matter how annoying or mean-spirited Jax is, Jiffy, for some reason, cares about him deeply.

*Jax hates how he unintentionally catches himself listening to Jiffy whenever she scolds him, and actually starts to feel guilt for his actions. He could give less of a shit about the opinions of others, but for some reason, her opinion actually truly affects him.

*As much as they try to keep their distance from each other, they find themselves gravitating towards each other a lot more often than not.

*Their relationship is very complex because there are moments (many moments) where they actually get along and enjoy each other's company. But then all of a sudden, as if they suddenly realize they're being civil towards each other, they're fighting again.

*Jax is mainly the one trying to keep them at arm's length. It scares him how easily he attached himself to this supposed stranger.

*Jiffy wants them to get closer because in the back of her mind, she feels like she knows him somehow. But she is also constantly frustrated by Jax's apathy for the whole situation, or at least the shaky front he has put up.

*This whole thing is driving them both a little insane.

#digital art #my art #the amazing digital circus #tadc #tadc jax #tadc oc #the amazing digital circus oc #oc #original character

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loudlooks · 1 year

Text

Valentine’s Nap

Wrote this about a week ago after @hopeless-nostalgiac tagged me in this post. Didn’t like how it turned out, and figured I’d write and post one of the other two ideas I had, flare up got worse, forgot all about this until I saw a Valentine’s day ad this morning and figured I might as well post this with a Valentine angle now that my brain is operating at 30%.

Word count: 1076

A faint tap against her foot, and her hand flew to the gun on her right hip before her eyes had fully opened. The slight amusement in her boss’s blue eyes, combined with the soft smile on his lips, instantly relaxed her mind and body. The soft breathing and warm body leaning heavily into her left side made her want to doze off again.

“Shift change,” Gibbs said, resisting a chuckle when Tony replied with incomprehensible mumbling.

“Tony,” Ziva said softly, stifling a yawn.

More mumbling.

She repeated his name more loudly, gently elbowing him, feeling Gibbs’s stare heavy on both of them.

Tony smacked his lips and opened his eyes slowly. A smile lit up his whole face as soon as his gaze met hers, and she couldn’t help but smile back brightly, warmth spreading through her body.

“Hi,” Tony said in a husky voice she would never grow tired of.

“Hi,” Gibbs replied with mock pleasantry.

Ziva’s sleep-deprived brain flashed back to Eli walking in on her making out with an IDF soldier he had explicitly forbidden her to see. She sat up straight as a board on the old worn-out couch, jostling Tony—who was mid-yawn—wide awake. The amusement in her boss’s eyes had been replaced with suspicion, and she wasn’t entirely sure how she felt about that.

Nervous energy made her bolt off the couch, and walk out of the room while giving Gibbs a tight smile.

McGee looked over his shoulder as she approached him at the window. “Did you get some sleep?”

Avoiding eye contact by looking through the binoculars, she curtly said, “yes.”

“So, not a lot?”

Ziva lowered the binoculars an inch. She had slept quite well, actually, but did have a reputation, not to mention a ruse, to uphold. “Tony was snoring in my ear.” She blinked slowly, remembering his warm breath on her face and how the soft sound of his breathing had lulled her to sleep.

At the sound of Tony’s footsteps she dropped the binoculars, and looked for his reflection in the window. There was a mischievous twinkle in his eyes as he stepped in between them, and glimpsed over his shoulder.

“What’s up with the boss?” He asked McGee with a nod at the other room.

“Nothing,” McGee said, and fleetingly looked at Ziva. “Maybe your snoring annoyed him?”

Tony stopped trying to flatten his hair with his hands, and glared at McGee. “I do not snore.”

Ziva made a bee-line to the other side of the small room, and sat down in front of the surveillance monitors, unable to focus on any of them.

“Ziva said-“

“Ziva said what?” Tony interrupted.

She glanced at him, unable to read his expression, then actually focused on the monitors showing nothing out of the ordinary.

He approached her from behind, and casually flicked her pony tail. “Do you have a problem with my breathing, agent David?”

Ziva bit her bottom lip and evaded his gaze. She knew exactly what she would find there and didn’t need that kind of distraction while working.

For once, Gibbs’s impeccable timing worked in her favor, as he entered the room and declared he was going to get take-out. “What do y’all want?”

“I want a Valentine’s date,” Tony said, disappointment lacing his words.

“You’re not my type,” Gibbs replied, then handed a take-out menu to Ziva.

She accepted the slightly crumpled piece of paper, but refused to look at either of them, knowing full-well the look on Tony’s face would crack her up.

“Will you stop complaining,” McGee said testily, “you’re not the only who had to cancel a date.”

Tony walked over to McGee and placed a hand on the younger man’s shoulder. “I know this may come as a shock to you, probie, but playing video games with your girlfriend is not the same as a date.”

Ziva swiveled her chair around to face both of them. “Oh, I don’t know about that.”

Tony raised an eyebrow at the challenging look she gave him. “I went all out for this date, made reservations months ago, fancy dinner at a French restaurant, a little dancing afterwards, the perfect gift she’s been eyeing for a month.”

Ziva frowned at the mention of the gift. While she was half expecting him to buy her some flimsy negligée or something, she had never actually brought that up.

Grinning widely at her confusion, Tony added, “Something subtle, not meant to be seen, that fits perfectly around her very elegant ankle.”

Her lips parted and heart swelled as she realized he was talking about the ankle holster she had mentioned thumbing through last month’s Guns magazine. She knew he paid close attention to her likes and dislikes, but somehow small things like this still caught her off-guard.

The warmth in his eyes sent a tingle down her spine as he walked up to her.

“Are you implying that all the thought and effort I put into –“ he caught himself just in time, “my Valentine’s date, is the same as gaming?”

Her desire to close the distance between them was kept in check by the presence of Gibbs and McGee. She licked her lips and inhaled deeply, never breaking eye contact. Fancy dates were fun, but she appreciated the quiet evenings they spent at home just as much. “Perhaps not quite gaming, but something more…relaxing and intimate.”

“Like napping,” Gibbs interjected.

Ziva smiled widely, holding up the paper menu and pointing it at Gibbs. “Yes! Oh…” Her demeanor deflated somewhat at the knowing look in her boss’s eyes.

Gibbs took the menu from her, a conflicted look on his face. He stared at Tony, whose only reply was jutting his chin. When he met Ziva’s eyes once more, a slow smile had spread on his lips. Without bothering to take anyone’s order, he headed for the front door. “I’ll bring you two back some candles.”

Relieved their boss wasn’t going to make things difficult for them, she smiled widely at Tony, who let out a heavy sigh.

“Why is he bringing candles?” McGee said while looking through the binoculars.

Ziva chuckled, focusing her attention on the monitors, as Tony shook his head and placed his hands on McGee’s shoulders, forcing him to face him.

“Timmy, remember when you wrote that book about us?”

McGee’s brows furrowed. “I told you, that wasn’t about you…” He glanced at Ziva, then back at Tony. “Oh!”

#tiva fanfiction #tiva #my fanfiction

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thatfangirlofsb · 1 year

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A/N: Hello, I'm back with the second part of Moya tsaritsa. You can read the first part here.

T/W: Spoilers for King of Scars and Rule of Wolves.

"Preparations and a more annoying than usual Nikolai won't be the only things she'll have to worry about."

Moya tsaritsa (II)

"If you try to add any of your inventions to the ceremony again, you will know why the grisha students fear me."

If she had gone back in time, her answer to the question of becoming a general would be a resounding no. Damn desire of being promoted.

"It would just make a small explosion, nothing more." Nikolai's voice was between laughter and seriousness; without choosing a fixed emotion.

"When you say small explosion I see all the guests covered in soot and the walls cracking." She ran her fingers over the blue fabric that was on the table, her eyes narrowed slightly and she pointed out to the servant the gold cloth that was to the right of the previous one. "Do you understand?"

"Only..."

"No." She said flatly before turning to him and look at him visibly angry. "Why do I have to be here? It's your wedding, not mine Nikolai."

She knew that inside her there was one more reason to tell him that, but she would never dare to say it out loud. She still couldn't bring herself to name it, and she knew it wouldn't go away no matter what she do to prevent it. She was still going to try, whatever it cost her.

"But you agreed to help me." He was right, but she also regretted that. She didn't think those stupid preparations were going to break her so much inside. "This would be very boring without your weird looks when I choose something."

"I'm choosing almost everything." Without taking her eyes off him, she crossed her arms over her chest. It seemed that the blond didn't understand that she was angry, she didn't know how to make him see it anymore. "It looks more like my wedding than yours."

And that, in a possible far distant future, was an impossible wish she had. The Lantsov's emerald, the one with she had joked with Alina when they were at the Spinning Wheel looking at all the dresses that the then prince had given to the sun summoner, on her finger.

Her desire for power was clouding her judgment, or so she told herself, and it had been growing ever since the current king let her know the real Nikolai. He, without realizing it, had opened up more with her than with Alina herself; with which he was foolishly in love no matter the summoner always made it clear her refusal to his feelings. Was the same thing happening to Zoya? She was... it was even more difficult for her to say the word than apologize, falling in love with something unreachable; just like him with the half shu girl.

When had it happened? She didn't want to know and she didn't want to think about it either. However, her mind couldn't help but remember every night that, after the demon's escape, on the way back to the palace they had to pretend to be two lovers on the run looking for a few hours of freedom. Did they keep that mask even inside the palace or was the closeness and possible affection Zoya felt real? Even if it was, she knew that there were many different kinds of feelings; and Nikolai certainly wasn't thinking the same thing.

Nikolai, the king Nikolai. She always tried to remember that when their eyes met, but it seemed that her brain stopped working when he fixed his eyes on her blue ones with that typical lopsided smile of him. Even if the war hadn't happened, even if she continued to follow Kirigan like a lapdog... those wishes would still be impossible. Vasily would be king and not him, true, but Nikolai would also hold the title of second in line until the saints made the bad decision of let his older brother reproduce. His range only joins with similar ones, and that was clear to her. They were from different worlds, even though they were in the same place and had a friendly and working relationship; although for other people the only place they shared was the blonde's room.

He was a Lantsov, and she was a girl with a miserable life who managed to get out of it. As good and exciting that sounded, it wouldn't matter to any of the nobles women who had been chosen by herself to carry the emerald that in the past she had only seen as a possession. Only the blood mattered, and the one from the squaller was not so perfect. What king in his right mind (although she often doubted Nikolai was) would choose a half suli as his wife? It would be a very stupid move, and although he used to do them quite often, Zoya knew he would never go to that extreme. He was stupid, but not an idiot.

"Zoya... are you ok?"

Nikolai's voice woke her from the trance. How much time had she spent thinking about him? She was hoping some healer had a solution to that problem, she was going to go crazy before the wedding. Maybe she could play the buffon in this one if she continued following the same path she was taking at the moment.

"Yeah. I was just thinking."

"In what?"

In you, but she only said that in her head.

"In this wedding. It seems like it's the only thing I can think about because to make all the decisions you ask me or make me choose." She hoped her tone of voice sounded angry enough to don't reveal that little vulnerability of hers.

"I didn't know weddings make you nostalgic."

Nostalgic? Yes, it was confirmed; Nikolai had completely lost his mind. Perhaps he would be the court jester at the wedding, or the both of them if the days that followed until the big ceremony didn't stop being the same.

"The day I'll be sad is going to be at my own funeral."

"But... you would be dead. The dead people don't cry."

"Exactly." She turned around again and looked across the table. Various objects were piled up on the long wooden plank, waiting to be choosen by the groom or the general. "Is there something wrong that makes you think I'm sad?"

"No, just that you're teary-eyed."

What? It couldn't be. She quickly fixed her eyes on the nearest mirror and... yes, it was true. Were there some onions nearby to put the blame on?

"It's just... that." She said quickly pointing to a bunch of lighted candles decorated with the Lantsov's shield. "Do you see how much smoke they put out? Do you want the whole palace to smell like barbecue instead of roses during the wedding?" A sigh escaped her lips and with a slight movement of her hand she invoked her power to turn them off as quickly as she could. They weren't the reason she was about to cry, but the smell and the smoke were true. "But they are a good tactic if you want us all to cry during the ceremony."

"They are the ones that allowed the budget. Genya has looked for very expensive materials."

Blessed Genya, Zoya thought, looking down at the papers beginning to cross out and scribble.

"Okay... we can change them for better quality ones if you forget about your artifacts and..." Her eyes look at all the remaining items on the table, checking their value and calculating which one wouldn't leave Ravka at overdrown. "And...we exchange the gold cloth for the blue one." The first was the more expensive of the two, but she didn't know why she had chosen it as the first option. Maybe it had to do with the color of the other? "What do you think?"

She cursed her next moves. She was so focused on finding an excuse for her very possible future tears that she didn't hear him move. She didn't hear how he approached the table, standing behind her to look over her shoulder to the objects; was he so interested now in the wedding preparations?

If she had known all this beforehand, she wouldn't have turned around thinking that he was leaning against the wall; away from her.

If she had known all that, she wouldn't be in that situation. Their faces wouldn't be excessively close and she wouldn't be thinking of grabbing the collar of his shirt that was sticking out of the gap in the front, left by his open jacket, and pulling him closer to kiss him.

In the past would she have? Of course, without hesitation, and she wouldn't have cared what title he held or if he wanted another against his fine lips. But now? No, it was no longer about wanting someone; but to love him. Because, no matter Zoya found it difficult and did not want to accept it, what she felt for the king in front of her was something deeper than what was said by rumors.

Her mind couldn't help but transport herself to that day when she made a big mistake. The day she opened up to him, thinking that maybe he was going to die bringing out the monster inside and she would have to return to Os Alta, alone, with a paper declaring her queen after his dead as the only memory she could treasure.

"For Ravka..." She whispered feeling a soft breeze of air swirl around her. Not now, she thought, noticing how her grisha attributes were appearing at the worst possible moment.

"What?" He asked, unable to avoid showing his confusion, but also without being able to control his gaze, which lowered to the other's lips.

"For Ravka Nikolai, you have to do this for Ravka." She groped the table with her free hand until she found a silk soft as a caress, balled it up in her hand, and threw it at Nikolai's face. "Not by spending money. You're emptying the arks too much for a simple wedding."

"After what I did... I have to fix it somehow." As he removed the cloth from his face, he watched how Zoya walked briskly to the other end of the table and began to look at it as if it were the most interesting thing in the world and wrote more on the ink-filled papers. "And Shu Han hasn't given much money for the ceremony either."

"After what you did?" Zoya gave a nervous laugh. Surely after that meeting the servants that were with them in that room would begin to release rumors about the little moment of closeness they had had. Perhaps they would say that the king had fallen in love with his once again fiancée and left the poor Zoya devastated? Some rare disease Zoya had passed on Nikolai from one of her many lovers? Would Nikolai have found out that Zoya only came to him because of his brother Vasily and that, after he passed away, she was no longer interested in him? She would rather pluck out her eyelashes than have any type of interest in the finally dead Vasily. "If I were Ehri Kir-Taban I would already have kicked your ass and sent you to the Wandering Isle. For free."

"A really deserved vacation." He answered with his usual sarcastic tone, but without taking his eyes off her. These last days Zoya was acting very strange, but to be honest, he too. Every day they woke up they remembered that the wedding was getting closer, as if they were only free from those thoughts in their dreams. "Where are you going?"

Zoya, as he spoke, had already opened the door with a burst of grisha air and was stepping under the threshold, putting the papers tightly again her chest.

"To prepare the wedding of someone who is old enough to do it by himself and without anyone's help."

"Is anyone else getting married and no one has told me?"

—————

"And please, the coffers are not for so much expenses." Zoya's hands gently laid the pile of papers on the small tea table in Genya's room. "Now I'll need to ration the money until Shu Han sends the dowry, and that's going to take a long time."

All those archaic traditions had always seemed complete nonsense to the black-haired woman, paying the future husband to marry a girl? Thinking about that reminded her of a 9 year old girl and a church, she didn't want to bring to her mind moments from the past to torment her. But now more than ever they needed those ancient practices.

"Is there something that worries you?" Genya said with a small smile, sitting down on the chair facing the squaller with a cup of steaming tea between her hands. Zoya wasn't in for tea, possibly just brandy; but that brought her mind back to a certain blond that, for the moment, she wanted to keep away from her head. "You know that the palace has ears, and in the end…"

"And in the end you discover everything." She finished, rolling her eyes for a few seconds that seemed like forever before continuing to speak. "But the ears are very big, and since they listen to so many things they misrepresent everything."

"We all like to hear some gossips." The teacup hit against the table as Genya put it down with a disgusted expression, having forgotten to put sugar in it. "And..."

"No." Zoya reached out and placed her hand on the cover of the sugar bowl, causing the redhead's palm to slam against hers as she reached for the object. "I'll start by rationing the sugar, if I were you I'd spend it well."

"I like weddings, but every day I hate this one more." The two couldn't help but look at each other and laugh at the same time, sincere laught that the blue-eyed girl hadn't thought she'd be able to let out during the month that lay ahead of them until the big day arrived. "What if we put hot powder on the wedding dress?"

"That's like asking to start a war." And although the sentence sounded worrying, her voice only said it with a joking tone which it was impossible, at the very least, to not smile. "But it would be fun to watch."

"Do you hate her?"

"If it weren't for her title and because she's our only salvation right now..." She sighed, looking up at the ceiling as if it was the most interesting thing in the room. "I would throw a bucket of that powder at her face myself. Someone innocent died because of her."

"Zoya...she has only been and still is a chess piece in her sister's game." Genya couldn't help but hesitate before keep going, even though she knew she needed to let it go as soon as possible. "She's like us before, some young girls who despite everything they were told were the same thing; chess pieces."

"Are you assuming that I am no longer young?" Zoya said in a teasing tone, just to try to avoid thinking about the last words she had said to her. But it was impossible, they had already gotten into her head.

"Looks like you've been spending too much time with a certain blond." Genya couldn't help but take off that seriousness and laugh when she heard it, it was as if she had him in front of her at that moment. "You already sound like him."

"Yes, however I think I'll ask for a raise." The tips of her fingers began to tap gently on the table, she needed to get some fresh air or she would end up less sane than some soldiers after being in the trenches. How could Nikolai have endured that? It was unbearable for someone ordinary, but for a royal person... No, today the hours of thinking about him are over, she said to herself, getting up from her chair in a quick movement. "There will never be enough money and jewels in the world to pay just what I deserve after all I have to put up with."

"I have Heard of one that..."

Oh no, not again. There was no need for Genya to be so mysterious about what she was talking about, the damned Lantsov emerald. She didn't know how she could read her so fast. If in the Little Palace were some grisha order where they dedicated themselves to discover who likes who she would be the saint of all; but for the moment she was grateful that it wasn't Corporalki to hear how her heart began to beat faster at the mention of that ring and the meaning.

"Genya..." She said her name with a slightly reprimanding tone that the other woman ignored.

"The princess that is going to come from Shu Han brings it. They say it shines like the sun and…"

If Genya had been talking for hours about the jewel... Zoya didn't notice. Her mind wandered over the thoughts she had been having. How could she have been such an idiot to think about the Lantsov ring? If it didn't show how insane she already was… she wouldn't know what more could indicate it.

"I have to go." She didn't want to talk about the damn wedding anymore, so she headed for the door as fast as her tired legs could carry her.

"Wait... I forgot to tell you that the princess arrived this morning."

"So soon? Still..."

In addition to having to put up with Nikolai now, would she also have someone else after her? That's it, she gave up talking care of the wedding. Let the future happy couple do it all.

"She might like dramatic entrances, at least the two of them would already have something in common."

"I hope they also have in common the desire to prepare weddings. I resign."

And as angry as she came in, she came out. It was time to train to release that anger and not accidentally throw someone into the air. However, if that happened with a certain princess and a certain king... she was sure that it wouldn't be a mistake.

—————

You can read the first part here.

You can read the third part here.

You can read the fourth part here.

You can read the fifth part here.

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