You know what gets me about the whole, ‘Niffty is a child because she’s short and flat-chested with a big eye and occasionally has childish mannerisms’ thing?

Aside from the difference of having 2 big eyes instead of 1, you just described me.

I’m a grown-ass adult. I’m 25. I’m 4’11” with A cups (although I’d really rather not even have those, so I wear a sports bra or bind and wind up looking even flatter most of the time).

I have ADHD, and possibly autism. I personify objects like blankets or stuffed animals. I sing to myself, I fidget and stim, I sometimes struggle with telling what is/isn’t a joke or taking things literally.

I’m playing catch-up on learning basic skills like cooking and cleaning because I was neglected by one parent and overly sheltered by the other. I struggle with completing tasks on time or doing them without very specific instructions.

All these things look like childish behaviors in the wrong light.

I can very easily imagine myself being described as ‘uwu sweet child, can’t do anything by themself, needs to be taken care of, so innocent, so pure, literally baby, don’t ship them they’re so child-coded,’ if I was a fictional character.

Again. I’m 25.

I don’t need or want to be infantalized, and when I see people saying this shit about Niffty (a grown-ass, 22 year old woman who happens to be short, flat chested, big-eyed, and a little childish) I can’t help but think:

Wow. If that’s what they think of her, then what do they think of me?

https://twitter.com/BrogIe_pyon/status/1277957903467474945

https://web.archive.org/web/20211006194309/https://twitter.com/chrysanthemvm_/status/1445837024586514435

Seeing a character intended to be delusional pop in a show or other storytelling medium and feeling your chest tighten because you're expecting the ableism/saneism from a mile away

it's like. i can't go anywhere or do anything without people showing me just how loudly they hate schizophrenic people, just how much they don't care about us. it's demonized and it's trivialized and it's turned into a joke and a trope and a monstrous thing and i'm expected to just. to just put up with this, all day long every single day, as though i'm not highly aware that the vast, vast majority of people around me, and especially the people who make the rules, that they think i'm something to be afraid of for things far, far beyond my control. it wears you down so, so much. i don't know how to cope with it.

about to go to mentoring and i'm thinking about how she's literally majoring in social science and psych related stuff and she still uses "narcissist" as an insult

i want you guys to know it’s a hot topic to call abuse “narcissism”

if you’re wondering why this is disgusting: narcissism is a personality disorder. and vilifying such a thing is extremely harmful and stigmatizes people who struggle with such a thing, which is also extremely ableist and dangerous. call it what it is. it’s abuse. verbal and emotional abuse. manipulation. belittling.

you don’t even have to be a ‘narcissist’ to be this way. abusive people exist. sorry you need to dehumanize them by labeling them as with a mental disorder (which shouldn’t be dehumanizing to have) because you can’t deal with the fact that human beings can become awful people. but don’t wrap others into this.

i do not have narcissism myself, but as someone within cluster b i too am affected. i have abusive people in my life that yes, have selfish tendencies, but wouldn’t call “narcissistic” because thats not how that works. again. i call it what it is. it’s abuse. full stop. stop armchair diagnosing for sympathy points.

answer under the cut, please don't spoil it for others tho!

"rebuilding" is fake! the others are all, incredibly, real. and most of them are crazier than i was able to fit in the poll answer box. :/

A narc abuse believer has reblogged from me so here's your Fucking reminder that no disorder is an abuser disorder. Your abuser(s) did/do not abuse you because they have an Abuser Disorder, they abuse(d) you because they believe(d) in their right to control you and had the means. And no, no disorder fucking creates that.

To abuse is a choice, and it's a carefully protected bolt in all the larger systems of oppression. To have a disability born out of being abused, that fucks You up, is not a fucking choice. And is certainly not a fucking protected bolt in the larger systems of oppression, rather the fucking opposite.

Yes, people with Any disorder Can choose to abuse. As well as people without that disorder! And people with that disorder are not fucking More Likely to abuse! And don't fucking armchair diagnose other people!

And the fucking case of parental abuse. You were not "raised by narcissists", you were raised by people whose literal societal role is to abuse you. Which Very Much does not absolve them. Parents are cops, and more. Read up on youth liberation and stop throwing *other survivors* into the fucking meat grinder.

And the fucking nerve to put anti-narc shit into the *npd* tags. You know well it's a Disorder, not an Abuser Personality Type that the abuser Chooses, and still demonize us.

The degree to which people say bad politics are caused by mental health issues is exhausting. People saying shit like "this person needs to be committed" is so angering. As a psychotic person who experiences delusions hearing people use those words as ad hominem attacks make me feel alienated and gross.

Just STOP, please, mentally ill people, including psychotic people, do not inherently have dangerous politics. We are not the ones doing mass violence, of course, some of us do, but the vast majority of people doing mass violence are not psychotic.

Mentally ill people can be dangerous, have shit politics, and be assholes. But so can people without any severe mental health issues.

Do not throw around the idea of institutionalized people, especially by force, if you don't get the problems mental health hospitals/units have. Do people not seem to understand the dark histories psychiatric facilities had, Not to mention the astonishing degree of violations, ableism, and violence people deemed "crazy" go through in psychiatric hospitals. Yes, we need facilities to give people higher levels of care. But being held against your will is traumatic. Being in underfunded/understaffed/under-regulated facilities is traumatic AF.

People who hear voices, people with dissociative disorders, delusional people, people with compulsions and all others considered crazy are not the real problem.

the severe normalization of ableism against mental disability as long as it isn’t calling people the r-slur or “autistic” fucks me up

even if it isn’t towards a disability i have

a tumblr user rightfully calls out ableist language yet in the same breath calls a bigot “a stu pid idi ot”, claiming them to be “less intelligent than all mentally disabled people ever”.

nevermind the fact that anyone of any level of intelligence can be bigoted.

describing their ableist characters as “psy co” for being a bad person. and then claiming not to be ableist themselves.

genuinely makes me sad, ACTUALLY FUCKING CRYING, seeing disabilites get disregarded and indirectly insulted in spaces THAT ARE SUPPOSED TO INCLUDE THEM for the sake of insulting bad people.

people need to learn from their mistakes.

please stop using disabilites as insults. there’s other ableist insults beyond the r-slur or using “autistic” as an insult. please look out for them.

MASSIVE CW: Vent, suicide mentioned, Drug and alcohol addiction, Caffiene addiction, Accidental Overdose, child abuse mentioned, mental health neglect, medical malpractice, mental hospitalization, police brutality, prison mentioned, AND THIS IS A VERY POLITICAL POST (FAR LEFTISM (I am a anarchocommunist)) PLEASE ASK ME TO ADD MORE CW IF NEEDED,

It really bothers me how I will never relate to or feel nostalgic to late 2000s to early 2010s post about elementary school.. I see picture of the inside of buses, school activities, and all of that, I can’t relate to any of it.. I didn’t go to elementary school and I only did 2 months of 7th grade and 1 week as a freshman and 1 fucking day as a sophomore, the rest of my schooling was at alternative schools that sucked and homeschooling which I can’t remember most of it cause at the time I was still actively being abused, I see my three youngest siblings and how they are still in school, how they got to learn and have friends, and I have none of that.. my two older siblings also have been to and completed high school, I have nothing.. I was too autistic and weird and mentally Ill to have done anything, I had been hospitalized twice and fucking spent my whole summer of 2018 (my last year in my home state) in a fucking residential program that said they were duel diagnosis BUT THEY ONLY FOCUSED ON THE KIDS THERE THAT HAD DRUG AND ALCHOL ADDICTIONS AND THEY COMPLETELY IGNORED MY CAFFEINE ADDICTION AND DOWNPLAYED IT SO MUCH THAT I GAVE UP ON QUITING they had FORCED me go to NA, MA, and AA meetings WHEN I DIDNT HAVE TO GO and they ignored my mental health, I LITERALLY HAVE BEEN STRUGGLING WITH SCHIZOAFFECTIVE DISORDER SINCE I WAS FUCKING 4 YEARS OLD AND IT TOOK 17 FUCKING YEARS TO GET A DIAGNOSIS CAUSE NO ONE WANTED TO DIAGNOSE A CHILD AND CAUSE OF THAT I WASNT ON ANTIPSYCHOTICS INTIL I WAS FUCKING 18!!!!! I WAS IN CONSTANT PSYCHOSIS AND I WAS PARANOID ALL THE FUCKING TIME AND I COULDNT DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT!! AND MY AUTISM AND ADHD WERE NEGLECTED CAUSE MY PARENT WERE TOO FOCUSED ON MY MENTAL ILLNESS AND MY TWO BROTHERS WHO WERE DIAGNOSED WITH AUTISM EARLY ON!!! I WAS DIAGNOSED AT 12 AND THEY DIDNT TELL ME INTIL I WAS 15!!!! I WAS CONSTANTLY DRINKING ENERGY DRINKS SO MANY IN A FUCKING DAY THAT I FUCKING OVERDOSED AND WAS UP FOR 3 WHOLE FUCKING DAYS AND MY MOM STILL DIDNT TAKE ME TO THE FUCKING HOSPITAL AND I WAS DOING ALL THAT TO SELF MEDICATE MY ADHD AND I DIDNT GET PUT ONTO STIMULENTS INTIL I WAS 18 AND THEN MY PSYCH TOOK ME OFF CAUSE I DIDNT DO WHAT SHE TOLD ME TO AND I SPENT MONTHS TRYING TO GET A NEW PSYCHIATRIST AND WHEN I DID SHE PUT ME BACK ON THEM WITH NO STIPULATIONS CAUSE ITS FUCKED UP TO DO THAT!!!!AND I MISSED THE LAST 4 APPOINTMENTS WITH HER CAUSE THEY ARE ONLINE ONLY APPOINTMENTS AND I HAVE MEMORY FUCKNG ISSUES CAUSE OF LONG FUCKING COVID SO NOW IVE RUN OUT OF MY FUCKING RITALIN AND I HAVE TO SELF MEDICATE WITH ENERGY DRINKS TO FUNCTION PROPERLY BUT I HAVE A FUCKING HEART CONDITION AND SO NOW MY HEART RATE IS HIGHER THAN AVERAGE (USUALLY ITS 100 AND NOW ITS BEEN AROUND 150) CAUSE I DONT HAVE PROPER STIMULENTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FUCK THE MENTAL AND MEDICAL HEALTH CARE SYSTEM IN THE FUCKING UNITED STATES OF FASCISM CAUSE NOW I HAVE FUCKED UP TEETH AND CAUSE I CANT GET THEM FUCKING FIXEX CAUSD I DONT HAVE FUCKING DENTAL INSURANCE CAUSE MY STATE INSURANCE DOSENT COVER DENTAL OR OPTICAL AND GUESS WHAT? BLINDNESS RUNS IN MY FAMILY AND MY VISION HAS BEEN SLOWLY DETERIORATING AND I JUST HAD TO PAY 80$ FUCKING DOLLARS TO SEE AN OPTRISTION AND I ONLY RECEIVED 628$ A MONTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FUCK THE SYSTEM FUCK CAPITALISM FUCK CHRISTOFASCISM FUCK THE GOVERNMENT FUCK COPS FUCK THE PRISON INDUSTRIAL COMPLEX FUCK THE MILITARY INDUSTRIAL COMPLEX FUCK IT ALL

I AM FULL OF SO MUCH FUCKING RAGE I SWEAR I COULD TAKE ON THE WHOLE POLICE FORCE HERE BUT I KNOW I CANT AND THAT IT JUST BE POLICE ASSISTED SUICIDE!!!!!!!

Me, online: I am cringe, but I am free. Cringe culture isn’t dead, but I’m killing it with my bare hands. I will enjoy my dumb little hobbies and interests and I will take pride in them. Everyone should do what they want forever.

Me, irl: If I stop masking my autism/ADHD/whatever makes me Like This™️ for one (1) second, then my entire family will hate me and I will crawl in a hole to decompose.

(completely incorrect assessment of causality, how laws are passed, etc + probably incorrectly interpreted/debunked/nonexistent studies aside): can we kill this myth already? (yes there are more than two such choices, “lolicon works as an ‘outlet’ for potential sexual abusiveness” is definitely wrong, but “it makes it worse” is also very wrong.) fantis rely on these bland input-x-output-y functions w/no nuance, no curiosity, no further social analysis (same as the general psych/criminological mindset) bc easy way to avoid actual intellectual rigor & looking at the world around you with more honest eyes.

“porn escalation” is a myth pushed by the evangelical lobby, following older puritanical ideas of sexual assault & abuse being a product of irresistible biological urges / sexual deviancy / overly high sex drive / unmediated fantasy & not their own fault, a product of their own values & will to power but some external influence (e.g. “satan”). patriarchs & abusers & others invested in upholding this social order have fucking incredible propaganda systems and part of that is how such bias has infiltrated academia and research and perceptions thereof. c.f. “Rational Science(tm)” from the Right, w/“you’re just Denying The Facts” if you argue they’re wrong or are motivated by bias or are fueling biases.

no matter how many of these kinds of videos I tell youtube "don't recommend this channel to me", I just keep getting this kind of video recommendations. Why. There's nothing even close to this I'm choosing to watch. But yeah, don't give these things a 'thumbs down', go to the little three dots by it and choose 'don't recommend this channel to me'.

people keep saying delulu and they keep trivializing psychosis and they keep saying things like "living in my delusion!" as though i'm not seen as a monster who should be locked up for my delusions, as though it's a fun flashy experience, as though it's something to want.

it's really telling that all the people who used to use "psychotic", "shizophrenic", "retard" and "insane" as insults and constantly harrass anyone who behaved slightly "weird" now apparently care so much about protecting mentally ill and nd people from "fakers"