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#reach into my soul
euesworld · 1 year
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"Reach into my soul and take out the shadows, plant some seeds and grow some flowers.."
Silence the devil inside - eUë
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kitamars · 9 months
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oh no! more ginhiji
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steddieas-shegoes · 1 year
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Eddie was acting weird.
Well, he was always a little weird. But this was weirder than usual.
For one thing, he kept sneaking into the bedroom as soon as he got home from work, not even acknowledging that Steve was cooking dinner in the kitchen. He always came up behind him and kissed his shoulder before going to shower. Always. But not for the last couple of weeks.
Then, Steve noticed he would be on the phone with Hopper of all people. It’s not that they didn’t get along, they’d moved well past that, but they didn’t exactly seek each other out for conversations. He waited until Steve was in the shower or already in bed, which rubbed Steve a bit wrong. Eddie never hid shit from him.
But the turning point, the moment that Steve decided he needed to say something, was when Eddie went to dinner with Robin. Alone.
Eddie and Robin were friends. Some would even say close friends. It’s hard not to be when you face what they have together. But they always hung out with Steve.
So when Steve found out they’d been out without him, he confronted Eddie.
“What the hell are you up to?”
Steve was maybe coming off as a bit of an asshole. His hands on his hips like he was ready to discipline a child, his face serious, voice stern. But he had to know what was going on.
Eddie raised an eyebrow, not used to being at this end of Steve’s mom pose. He usually stood behind him with a smirk, arms crossed in front of his chest to emphasize his disappointment and amusement at whatever child had earned it.
“What do you mean?”
Steve rolled his eyes.
“You know what I mean.”
“Do I?”
“Dinner with Robin? Without me?”
“Am I not allowed to be her friend without you?”
Eddie’s voice had turned guarded in a way that it hadn’t been with Steve in years.
Steve paused. Something was wrong. Eddie wouldn’t be acting like this if it wasn’t something big.
But what could he possibly be talking with Robin and Hopper about secretly? Was he in trouble? Were they trying to charge him with something from years ago? Why would he go to Robin about that and not Steve? Why would he have to sneak into the bedroom every evening?
The math wasn’t adding up, but Steve nearly failed math two years in a row so maybe he shouldn’t try to make the calculations.
“Are you in trouble? I can help. We can go somewhere. Hopper doesn’t have to know. Is he helping you? He should, he knows you’re innocent. They can’t even charge you for anything anymore right? There’s like, a statue of limits or something?”
Eddie was staring blankly at him.
It must be worse.
Maybe he was going into Witness Protection and Steve couldn’t come so he was trying to plan how to tell Steve. Oh God, Steve couldn’t let him go with no idea where he would end up or what his name would even be.
“Eds, please. You can’t go. They may not give you a choice, but you could maybe write to me so I can follow you? I’ll change my name too.” Steve felt tears in his eyes, and he hated it. He hated that his reaction to this was panic and crying as if he was the one in trouble and on the run. “Do they know we’re a package deal? And Robin. Robin will have to come. Is that what you talked about at dinner?”
Eddie was still just staring at him.
“Eddie please. Talk to me.”
Eddie shook himself out of his stupor, looking down at the floor and mumbling something Steve couldn’t quite hear.
“What? I can’t hear you.”
“I’m taking you to Disney World.”
That was not a sentence Steve ever thought he would hear. Especially not from Eddie fucking Munson.
His first reaction was to laugh, but when he saw the way Eddie’s face fell, he stopped.
“Um. Okay. You’re serious,” Steve let his thoughts wander as he watched Eddie’s whole body tense the way it did when he was working himself up.
Steve thought about how they had watched the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade last year and saw a float from a new Disney film, he couldn’t remember which one now, but he remembered turning to Eddie and saying, “you know my parents never took me to Disney World? All that money and they spent it all on their exotic vacations and cruises and left me at home.” Eddie had looked at him like he broke his heart before he said “Wayne could never afford it so I never really bothered to ask.”
And it wasn’t that a lot of their friends had been. Growing up, more kids spent time at beach resorts or the lake for summer vacations. Disney was still so new to people, it seemed like a pipe dream for anyone who didn’t have at least a middle class income.
But Steve saw the commercials. He watched the movies. He secretly loved the idea of a whole park dedicated to the childhood happiness and magic he felt when he watched them.
But he never asked his parents, and by the time he thought he could try to go, he was “too old.”
He’d given up on the thought.
Eddie was playing with his rings nervously, still avoiding eye contact with Steve.
“You’re taking me to Disney World?” Steve felt his voice break as the realization washed over him.
Eddie was somehow finding the money to take him to a place he’d secretly wanted to go since he was a kid, even though it was a place he probably didn’t want to go, and he’d wanted to take him so badly he somehow involved Robin and Hopper in the planning process.
God, he loved him so much.
Steve stepped closer to Eddie, hesitantly reaching out to pull his hands apart and lace their fingers together.
Eddie finally looked up at him and Steve couldn’t help leaning in to kiss him softly.
“You’re taking me to Disney World.”
Eddie nodded, a smile slowly spreading across his face.
“How? When? Why does Robin know? Why does Hopper know?”
Eddie chuckled before he placed a kiss on Steve’s forehead.
“Robin knows because she’s been arranging everything. I couldn’t really do it here and work’s been busy so I couldn’t do it there. She offered to help. We’ve been planning it since last Christmas.”
Steve felt himself fall even more in love. Somehow, the love of his life and his platonic soulmate have been planning this incredible trip for him for six months and had only recently given anything away.
“Hopper knows because I did have to make sure I could leave the state. I know my name was cleared, but I just wanted to be certain. Then, he got involved with the planning because he wants to take El and Will this year.”
Steve was gonna start crying, probably any second. He could feel the lump in his throat getting thicker.
“I’ve been saving up anything extra for months. The kids all put in some money to buy your ticket. Mrs. Wheeler let me use Mr. Wheeler’s airline miles to book the flight so it was only about half the cost. Mrs. Henderson gave me her work bonus to put towards the hotel at Dustin’s insistence. Apparently she usually uses it to send him to camp, but he didn’t want to go this year. So. Yeah. Surprise?”
Steve was crying.
Everyone had played a part in this happening, and Eddie was the man behind it all.
Steve threw his arms around Eddie’s neck and jumped to wrap his legs around his waist. He did this all the time, so Eddie only stumbled a little before settling with his hands under Steve’s thighs to hold him up.
“I love you so fucking much,” Steve said against Eddie’s shoulder, tears staining his shirt. “Thank you.”
“I love you, too, sweetheart.”
Eddie placed a kiss on Steve's temple, letting his lips linger for a minute before pulling away.
“So we leave this weekend.”
Steve dropped his legs, immediately panicking about the trip.
“What? What about work? I have so much to do. How long will we be gone? I’m supposed to bring Dustin and Will to a show Sunday. Oh no. I don’t even have a bathing suit. There’s a pool at the hotel right?”
Eddie kissed him, effectively shutting him up, though not quite quelling his panic.
“I’ve already arranged all that. Mike got his license and got permission to drive them. Robin got you off the schedule. There’s a bathing suit in the bag I’ve been packing slowly for weeks.”
“Oh my God, that’s what you’ve been doing. I’ve been standing here waiting for my hello kiss while you secretly pack things for a surprise trip to Disney World. I’m so stupid.”
“Hey. None of that.”
Steve nodded once distractedly. Yeah, yeah, no talking negatively about his own intelligence or whatever they all made him agree to.
“When were you gonna tell me? When we were on the plane?”
“As if you would have arrived at an airport without asking me ten million questions,” Eddie rolled his eyes. “I was gonna tell you tomorrow night at dinner. Will even made this card that had clues inside.”
“Shit, I ruined it.”
“Sweetheart, no. It’s okay. I won’t tell Will. You can still keep the card. It’s a really cool design. He made Disney World look like a D&D game, said you’d probably not get all of it, but thought it was cool. It is, and I think I want him to design a tattoo for me when we get back, but I may have to call the shop in Indy I go to and –”
It was Steve’s turn to cut off his rambling with a kiss.
“I can’t wait to go with you. I can’t believe you would want to.”
“I’d go anywhere with you, you know that.”
“Yeah, I guess I do.”
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Drinking Buddies :)
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makerofmadness · 8 months
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HOLY FUDGE BARS THE BOOK JUST LIKE. DROPS A HUGE THING RIGHT HERE WITH THIS.
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"It becomes clear that the player and the main character aren't one and the same"
"You got The Locket"
"You took back the locket"
I've read through most of this book now and it does NOT just make statements like that or try to fill itself with fan theories. The most I've seen it "mess up" was with the story/battle context for Papyrus's really cool regular attack, calling it his special attack, which I have seen other people in the fandom do before anyway.
This author had direct access to Toby himself (there's notes about them asking him questions) and his own notes for the translators and stuff from when Undertale was being localized. there's screenshots of texts and spreadsheets.
I have seen nothing else in this book so far that is at all "stating theories as if they're canon." And iirc this book was officially considered "not part of Undertale merch" or something along those lines so it dodges the non-canonicity thing (plus again this is directly about the localization process behind Undertale from English to Japanese, I'm not sure how Toby's own notes on how Determination works could be considered anything but "canon").
...
I guess we were never really the greatest person, now were we...?
(this is the legends of localization book btw)
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elbdot · 6 months
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So, you and white haired boys, huh?
Oh don't even get me sTARTED...
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Somehow they just keep getting worse and worse EACH TIME, I DON'T KNOW H O W
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cairafea · 9 months
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i think the fast travel in this game is very cool 👍
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uhbasicallyjustmilex · 9 months
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alex looking more at ease with kermit the frog than live human guests is my favourite thing
(x)
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18catsreading · 6 months
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Aabria: I will be fine! Who are you gon-- NO. This isn't hormones, don't look at me like this is hormones! I wanna go NOW!"
Guard: miss, miss
Aabria: tell me to calm down, I dare you
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shawnaise · 3 months
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shawn slowly losing interest in solving crimes; becoming less and less involved in the psychic charade. coming to terms with the fact that maybe he never wanted to do this, or to be the way he is. tracing scars on his knees from shards of glass that covered easter eggs and realizing that other kids just got candy. not being able to stomach the fact that he fears observing himself too closely; for a deduction about how he operates may kill what’s left of him. him searching for any amount of self-worth to keep him from quitting the only thing he has left, and finding none. scraping the bottom of the barrel for months only to start clawing at the surface below. so he tears himself apart trying to be what his friends think he is and fails. finally taking the time to step back from his life and realize that everything he’s ever done has been for appearances; not for himself. shawn quitting, moving away from santa barbara and never looking back.
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frodo-with-glasses · 5 months
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So uh. I might’ve found a pattern here.
From The Fellowship of the Ring, “Three Is Company”:
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From The Two Towers, “The Uruk-Hai”:
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From The Return of the King, “The Houses of Healing”:
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Now I know Tolkien hated allegory. And I know LotR is not a copy-and-paste parable about WWII (which he didn’t fight in) or even WWI (which he did). But the man did see war, and so did people he loved, and he had a non-zero amount of trauma, and some of that is gonna make its way into his writing somehow.
And I think his soul might’ve had something to say about soldiers being forced to walk until they dropped from exhaustion.
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graythegreyt · 4 days
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GUESS WHO LISTENED TO THE ENTIRETY OF EPIC THE MUSICAL LAST NIGHT WHILE WORKING ON MY PHILOSOPHY ESSAY. HAVE A DUUSU AND A FELIX
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transmechanicus · 15 days
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Really fucked up that two ppl can care about each other and make their best efforts to communicate and still end up hurting each other so badly they cannot stand to be in the same room.
#my stuff#i feel soooo bad talking to my therapist about the same topics over multiple weeks#like i feel like they're sooo sick of it like damn can this bitch get Over It alreadyyyy#hi yes actually can we talk about the near catastrophic sense of betrayal and loss that has haunted my soul for over a month?#can we talk about how I overcompensate for other's possible feelings and emotions to desperately mask my terror at feeling out of control#can we talk about how even when I know ppl acted with logical reasons necessary for their situation it still hurt me?#and that this pain fills me up with so much anger and frustration that I'm powerless to put anywhere that won't hurt someone#so it just cooks me inside and makes me grind my teeth constantly for weeks#im so angry i did not deserve to be treated like this it's not fair and I have no capacity to fix it or control when it feels better#i just have to survive and wait until i forget about it and hope they don't decide to reach out and fuck it all up#cause i can see that happening#i'll finally be free of thinking about them and generally going about my day unbothered and they'll ask to get coffee or something#and I have no idea what I should do in that scenario. because I don't think we can be friends.#and you have not treated me with the compassion and warmth I treated you#i would want to say mean things. hurtful things. I would want to bite back for once.#and that's not me. that's not who I want to be.#i don't wanna see you. go away. don't talk to me if you're not going to make the pain go away.
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meowmeowmessi · 3 months
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ahappydnp · 3 months
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real talk though is dan going to keep his word and serve cunt at the wad film premiere with an ensemble or is he preparing the cropped jacket + pantaloons fit
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dilfpassing · 6 months
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Those are nice, huh? And they're not real, so they'll last forever.
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