the thing about me is that i love a widely hated female character. rory gilmore and amy march and julia wicker and nancy wheeler and ilonka pawluk….i am holding you all tightly to me <3

A day late posting these here but here’s a couple stupid drawings I rushed out for Valentine’s Day on RDL!

maybe this a strange thing to get hung up on but like. I can’t be the only one who subconsciously texts my friends a bit more professionally after writing a long email to my professor. Or whose internal monologue temporarily changes to sound like that YouTuber I just binged for 3 hours. Or who acts a little more excited and dramatic after watching an action movie. It’s normal to pick up patterns from other people and situations, right?? Why do my friends act so surpised when I start acting more like them, or tell me I “shouldn’t change who I am”? Like buddy. In NO social interaction am I presenting the Real Me. And besides that, you’re an important part of my life—why would it be so weird to be influenced by you? I don’t like being thought of as Weird or Not Genuine just because I do something differently from your previous expectations of me.

I’m bored so I’m on an asking spree(again)

Money or Happiness?

Money ☺️

I’m going to be a bastard whether I’m happy or not, so I might as well be a rich bastard right? Plus, the only thing really making me unhappy is my money situation rn sooo…

And Ig I could buy a therapist with the money?

But it also kind of depends on the context of the question

Like, is it that I’m rich but the reason I’m unhappy is because my entire family is dead and the entire world hates me… then I’d chose to be happy instead

Or, I’m physically incapable of feeling happiness, then the therapist plan probably won’t work. Might still chose money for that context tho

If I’m already happy, would choosing money get rid of that?

If I’m already rich, would choosing happiness get rid of that?

Would anything be gotten rid of?

Is it just ‘gain money’ or ‘gain happiness’? ‘Cause if that’s the context, the answer if pretty obvious.

Or is the question like, ‘born happy but poor’ or ‘born rich but unhappy’?

Maybe choosing money gets rid of everything that makes me happy and choosing happiness gets rid of my money? That would be a hard choice. I’d choose money to buy the things that make me happy, but if they’re gone… then there would be no point. But I feel like that’s a bit unfair, and kind of pushing people to the happiness side, since I could still make money.

Or—for that context—I can no longer make money after choosing happiness, and would spend the rest of my life poor? Then I’d rather choose neither tbh

Also, how much money? Could I even say that I’d be rich after?

When I hear this question, I usually assume that you lose one or the other, because just gaining is really too easy to choose. I’m not unhappy right now, so why would I choose to gain happiness? Losing one would make the choice much more difficult

This is probably just a question of values, though, so, money.

so I lied (sorry I’ll actually shut up after this post) but I did like SSGN so here’s some things I enjoyed

Mike just having chocolate frosting and eating it straight up

everyone else secretly asking for treats and Erica asking for raisins

Zoe being queer!!!

The idea that Svetlana just looks like the exact opposite of Erica (like what? Do all girls trained to be spies from a young age have the same style?)

Cathlex 🫶

i thought the “fort king” joke was funny in a stupid way (idk man my humors broken)

Erica obsessing over the animals (I love her)

to add on to that thought, when Ben and Erica were trying not to die and Erica was just like “STFU IM ALREADY WORRYING ABOUT KILLING THE SEALS” or whatever was there

Need. content. of. Jenny. acting. Like. Willows. Mom.

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You know Jack Jeanne….you can joke about Suzu being a weak singer all you want….

Doesn’t really work when you have Yuma Uchida playing him as if he has the voice of an angel 😂

Ok so I need to explain something that I’ve been doing to get it out of my head, feel free to add to this if you want

So ever since I was a kid I could not simply just be myself because I had no idea how to do that, so I adopted other people (usually YouTubers or tv characters I really liked) to copy and become. I would change how I express myself, how I would talk, and in one instance, I changed my laugh to sound more like the person I was mimicking.

This is still happening and has gotten to the point where I cannot picture myself as myself in my head but rather the person or character I have become. Like when I think of scenarios that are about myself in different situations, I’ll put the character in my place.

Is this an autistic thing?? Is this tied to masking?

sorry it’s early and i’m brushing my teeth while the sun is rising since I passed out last night before I got the chance to, and we’re getting genuine sunlight for the first time in weeks, and I’m busy contemplating just how ridiculous this series is

i’m suffering from too many things disease. theres too much stuff i want to do or read or watch right now but i can only do so much at once

Just finished catching up with a hermit so I’m gonna go ahead and post my watchlist of hermits (mainly for my own records lol)

All caught up and watching new episodes as they come out: Grian, Mumbo (ofc), Pearl, Impulse, Gem, Zedaph, Tango, Bdubs, Wels

Catching up on: Stress, Scar, False

Planning to catch up on next: Doc, Ren, Xisuma, xb, Keralis, Cleo

Will catch up on if I have time: TFC, Joe, Beef, Iskall

FUCK :(( why does this consistently happen that every time Eret streams lore, discourse starts up that makes me want to block people :((( fuck why does this happen every time

long time no post I don’t even have time to vent anymore I’m just . So busy. Like chaos absolute chaos the past few weeks I’m stressed out my freaking marbles. And then they got our boy Colin yesterday !! They fucked his shit up!! Uli and I were kinda worried bc he hadn’t stopped by to check his plants u know he’s like pretty much always there at the house. and it turns out he was in the hospital like wtfffff literally the day I make him stupid gluten free banana bread he got jumped by a group of guys and they like literally beat him to a pulp and left him on the side of the road wtfffff no !!!! Not our little guy!!! he needs to start carrying something to protect himself that’s so scary like if u saw his poor face. They like fractured his skull or some shit for what. For 2 ounces. He went to high school with these guys. Like I was so shocked when uli told me like no way. Anyway we’re all furious we’re going to go out and slash their tires and key their trucks n shit. Stupid ass redneck idiots. Deserve to have their faces beaten to shit like what they did to our buddy just ugh that makes me so mad

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So basically, in a case about him shoving money at someone so they shut up about him. . .he can’t shut the fuck up himself. I would say something clever and funny here, except the sad part is that this is just so normal in current politics that it’s just. . .not hilariously absurd behavior anymore? Not to say that it’s not absurd - it is beyond such, but it is just. . . predictable, I suppose.

I guess this is how I feel about politics lately? Either I get mad at everything or I try to laugh at everything and normally that works because politicians usually aren’t so tragically stupid so very often, but now I just kinda have to chuckle at the particularly eyeroll worthy things like this, and try to ignore everything else or my brain will explode.