#on the other he’s a sad wet man | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

redstarcat · 2 months

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Ladies and gentlemen, Caleb “16 Charisma” Widogast

#star canvas #critical role #critical role fanart #criticalrolefanart #mollymauk tealeaf #caleb widogast #widomauk #on one hand Caleb is suave af #on the other he’s a sad wet man #molly loves both versions :3 #duality of man

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acetier · 8 months

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will you be drawing any more of torin and varre? no rush at all, but i am lowkey obsessed with them now 👀

ask and you shall receive, anon :^)

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sad-emo-dip-dye · 9 months

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Comparing the two I feel like Mersault fyodor could have been a little more wet and pathetic

#thinking about the post with Sky abt Dazai decomposing #is it too much to ask for a sad wet pathetic little man covered in his own blood #put him back in the soup he’s not done yet #don’t ask why I had the other pic on hand #i might delete later idk #bsd #bungo stray dogs #bsd fyodor

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letmetellyouaboutmyfeels · 1 year

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Having now watched Bridgerton after resisting for years, all I can say is, if Anthony was my sibling and pulled that season two mess after all the trouble he caused me in my love life in season one...

*hands Daphne a knife and gets the hell out of her way*

#personal #I love when my men are messy and pathetic disasters #so it's not that I dislike Anthony at all #he's a sopping wet alley cat you find in the dumpster and I love it #but literally dude the fact that Daphne did not grab the nearest sharp object and stab you...#when he's like man I wish your husband was here to keep you in line BRO #you would have had to HOLD ME BACK #YOU DRAGGED MY HUSBAND'S ASS INTO A DUEL AND THEN NEARLY SHOT ME!!!!#IT'S YOUR FAULT I HAD TO FAKE DATE THE GUY IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!#I'M ABOUT TO FIRE SOME WARNING SHOTS AT *YOUR* HEAD #my siblings know better than to pull that nonsense they know they wouldn't live to see the sunrise #I'm sorry it's been DAYS I just cannot get over this #Lady Bridgerton's like yeah so sad Daphne had to leave because her kid had a cough DON'T LIE VIOLET #SHE LEFT BECAUSE THE OTHER OPTION WAS MURDER!!!#we all know how they got their second kid in Queen Charlotte #Daphne was like either I get a bunch of orgasms or I kill my brother #'aww you guys are pregnant again!' 'yeah it was sex marathon or fratricide' 'what?' 'don't worry about it'#Anthony if you think Simon 'I Fell In Love With Daphne Because of Her Scheming' Bassett #would do anything other than get the hell out of her way #you are SORELY mistaken #anyway don't ask me my overall opinions about the show or we'll be here all day but that one bit is just. haunting me. as a sibling.

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badlydrawn-brostrider · 6 months

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arent you already dating grandpa harley??? whys this such a major malfunction,

BRO: W.

BRO: What.

BRO: No, I am not datin' and never have dated that old man. That goes for any other guardians ya might be thinkin' of. Christ, people.

BRO: Do y'all not know what they say about makin' assumptions? It makes an ass outta u and me. Haven't even seen the old geezer in forever, both before and after the game.

BRO: Fuck if I know where he's at. I'm a single man, why'd ya think anons keep chasin' after my fine ass?

#bro is very single HELP #he can get bitches he just chooses not too (or cant he? the world may never know)#he may like that old man and other old men doesnt mean they actually reciprocate or are around LOL #the sad life of a pathetic wet cat of a man #bro strider #dirk strider #homestuck ask blog #hom3stuck #homestuck #anon asks #alas guardian yaoi is not real (yet)

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misspickman · 7 months

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How can u make a post talking about how fanon tim is so much more boring than the canon character and then be so fucking wrong about canon tim

#Sorry for vague posting it will happen again. I am truly amazed how badly this fandom cannot fucking read #I saw how many notes that post has and god. God #Tim fans (?) just love to talk about him like hes the coolest most unhinged character ever and be so wrong about things hes done #To the point where its like. Well uve just fanonized him again. This version of canon tim is not tim. Again!#txt #Its like on one end u have fanon tim 1 which is the sad pathetic wet paper towel of a man who is victimized and woobified to hell and back #And on the other end is fanon tim 2 which is the Cool version of tim where he has to be cooler and more competent than everyone else #And the most Haha Unhinged or whatever the fuck #And neither of these is true

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alchemiclee · 8 months

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jing yuan seems so sad and distant and lonely, especially watching his closest friends fall apart again and again....he's in so much anguish. it makes me wonder how he's still holding it together. how is he not completely broken yet like all his old friends...he must be really strong.

#sometimes I feel like the mara is knocking on his door and i'm so scared for him 😭#i wish to see him be able to move on and open up to others. form new bonds and not bury himself in work and keep a distance #that could save him at least for a while. but i mean its hoyo. they cant be trusted with any of these characters LMAO #i just have big soft jing yuan feelings. hes a sad wet can of an old man and i had a dream i held him gently #very awkwardly though since hes LARGE and im kinda smol lmao #i also wosh for blade to be held gently 😭#and dan heng needs a big tight hug by his express friends. i will send march and stelle to his room to snuggle him #its been so long since i had BIG FEELINGS for fictional characters idk what to do about it lmao #between these star rail boys and in genshin the fontaine siblings......S I G H S #oops im procrastinating my art again....

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mediterraneanmenace · 8 months

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I honestly think us Raphael fans all share one braincell I’ve seen headcanons and ideas I’ve also had for my own lore I love that for us

Plus what’s even better is seeing how we might take inspo from a similar idea and elaborate it in our own ways I am so hype to see what everyone is doing 😭 ❤️

#baldur’s gate 3 #bg3 #I love y’all if I wasn’t so shy I’d interact so much more #Raphael #All I have to offer you is Azarel and Raph being nasty and in a very conflicted relationship #I mean a nearly zealot and repressed tiefling holy inquisitor and a sad wet cat of a devil craving some love? Lessgo #Their ship name would be HellKnight or something since she’s a paladin too #Let’s say he gets a bit too possessive and controlling and she doesn’t like it at all #Which is what leads her to escape and hide until the events of BG3 #So you see they still love each other but Azarel suffers because he doesn’t understand she doesn’t want to be controlled #And Raph because he literally. Wants all of her. This man had her sign a marriage contract and refuses to void it

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the-kipsabian · 7 months

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#kip sabian #wrestlingedit #wrestling #night gifs #some sad pathetic loser to end this set off #this was such a fun match tho. highly enjoyed. i like it that youtube just lets me know now when new old stuff like this gets uploaded lol #so we'll probably see me gif more superbad later again yay #anyways here is he. a sad wet cat of a man 💜 my beloved 💜💜#my beloved #kip in a box #(rp blogs dont reblog; saving and other personal use with tag credits is fine)

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omgcatboi · 5 days

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Me and Hanzo are the same in the since that we listen to Kill_All_Your_Friends_MCR.wav when we get sad.

#i promise this is the only only only time ill make an overwat/ch shit post #please do not line me up with all the other hanzo mains and execute me im not like them i am aware that hanzo is just a miyamoto Musashi rip #off #hes literally just musashi and dr stange combinbed design wise am i wrong am i speaking lies am i the devil in disguise #am i manic or low i can't tell anymore #but what I CAN tell is that hanzo is a sad wet cat of a man and he deserves to be happy.#ok im probably gonna lov off now done started posting about han #hanzo on my fucking AFTERDARK that has nothing to do with him or ov/rwatch

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forcedhesitation · 1 month

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not the cute, confused animal head tilt astarion, please, anything but that...I'm not strong enough...

#bg3 #thoughts about media #morally questionable men and their head tilting...criminally endearing behaviour.#and he pairs it with that big. sad. wet eyed look of his? I feel weak. the rotten little creature that this man is...#sometimes he does something like this and I just want nothing more than to squish the ever-loving unlife out of him.#other times he says something so fucking stupid or mean I find myself telling him to shut up out loud.#my beloved. miserable. manipulative muppet.

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intergalacticaquarium · 2 years

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Every time somebody writes Eddie doing something super cool and sexy I have have headcanon two goblin-esque habits for him to keep it even

#eddie munson x reader #hes despicable and im in love with him and hes not sexy unless he has the energy of a weird loser who does weird off putting stuff #and is sometimes shoved into water idk i need my fictional men as sad and pitiful as possible or else im not attracted to them anymore #u say hes like a super kinky dom that gets ass all the time?#i say he hasnt washed his hair in 2 weeks and wears all those layers bc he gets cold very easily and shivers a lot #idk if anybody else is listening to taz ethersea but theres this lil guy called urchin #and he speaks in a high pitched voice and one of the first things he says is im a nasty lil freak just a wild little guy #the other day i was trying to find a thru line of like when the wretched little man becomes truly my beloved wretched little man #and i think its when they get soaked in water against their will #like a baptism of sorts #to really become the kind of character i will think about for several years #just sopping wet in their clothes on the rest of the adventure while they are touching wet denim #which is always bad #anyway #i feel like i always need to end these by saying that this is 100% genuine and said with love but i feel like if u read this far u know #i just have very specific and very bad taste in dudes #ive been rewatching some formative media lately and hoo boy every fuckin one theres like a soaking wet miserable boy #that i was fucking obsessed with #and every time im like oh yeah thats gotta be the origin #and then i see an earlier one and its that one #who was the original horrrible boy that made me this way?#wait #fuck #fuck wait i do know who it is and now i need to go lay down #fucking annakin skywalker #he and padme were my first ship my first queer crush simultaneously #and aparently absolutely instilled the deep love of sad boy cool girl within me #thats the name my friend gave it and she said it so succinctly that i needed a minute bc thats it #cool girl is also a slug woman in her own ways but shes always confident about it at least #anyway thanks ive had this blog for a week and now u know the entire history of my taste in men thanks for coming to my seminar

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alexalbongf · 11 months

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thinking abt how this was the thing that got me into f1 and made me a mick fan…..

#i really saw a sopping wet man and was like. i want that one #at least u know i’ve always been like this 🙏#the other thing that got me into mick majorly was the one where he’s in a BIG jacket and he’s like sad it’s very cold #that’s exactly my kinda content man . wailing

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manaosdeuwu · 1 year

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went from absent father to absent mother. not recommendable but it's funny as hell

#my mother was never really present as a mother. she was just there to be horrible to my brother and me 80% of the time jcjdjfjf #my father on the other hand. wet beast of a man. he's genuinely so good hearted and supportive #im going to quit my current job next year and he was so nice about it. he always says that i should do what i want to do -#- and he won't interfere. that i should have my own experiences and live according to my ideals #he is a bit sad that I'm not studying anything though #anyways. sleepy time. kissing u goodnight #nero habla

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stinkman-garbageboy · 8 months

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hmmmmm I’m doing evil!Durge next with evil!Astarion romance bc I’m gay and toxic but who should I romance for good!Durge……my heart’s telling me Shadowheart, but any of them would work thematically t b h

#bg3 #mine #text post #hmmmm choices #I could literally do 3 Astarion romances the brainrot is real #I’m not like other boys I like Astarion because he’s a catty bitch not because he’s a sad wet cat of a man #/j btw #baldurs gate 3

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martyrbat · 1 year

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surprise! surprise! — batman family #11

(ID below cut!)

[ID: Commissioner Gordon walking out of the G.C.P.D. in a green coat and hat on a beautiful sunny day! The narration guides: ‘February 19th, 1:30 P.M. — a surprisingly early time for Police Commissioner James W. Gordon to be quitting work for the day! Even more surprising — look who is waiting to pick up the commissioner... Alfred Pennyworth! Which segues into our next surprise — the first co-starring roles of the dauntless duo: Commissioner Gordon and Batman's Butler Alfred! Curiouser and curiouser, as Alice once said, and you can bet what transpires in these pages will be a... “Surprise! Surprise!”’ Gordon greets Alfred and enters a blue car as the butler starts to drive them. He checks, “Everything going smoothly, Alfred?” Alfred reassures the commissioner, “Like clockwork, sir! Master Bruce has an appointment with a dear old friend of his. He'll not miss me!”

The narration reads: ‘Guides on the tour bus through the area call this “stately Wayne Manor” — but despite its immaculate appearance and fine upkeep there is nobody living there... which partially explains the elaborate safety precautions its owner has taken...’ Alfred parks outside the imperial manor and proceeds to undo three keyed locks, Commisoner Gordon noting, “Bruce certainly keeps this place locked up tight!” Alfred politely dismisses, “The master maintains a superior security system to protect his property, sir! As you undoubtedly know, the crime-rate is frighteningly high in this area!

Alfred holds open the front door and beckons Gordon, “Here we are! After you, commissioner!” Gordon walks in but requests, “Thanks, Alfred — but since we're partners in this, can't you stop playing the man-servant?” Alfred draws back in surprise at being politely reprimanded. “Oh... uh, sorry, sir! It's my upbringing, you understand. My parents were in service before me.”

‘And shortly, as the ‘partners’ begin...’ Alfred and Gordon are starting to hang up a large, magenta pink banner that says ‘happy birthday Bruce’! Alfred tells him, “This surprise birthday party for Master Bruce is a top-flight idea, commissioner! ” Gordon is climbing up a ladder, now with his coat off and wearing a tucked in, light blue button down shirt and black tie. He responds, “Considering all the aid he's given me and my department over the years — it's the least I could do as a friend! Now, what say we hang the banner on this wall?” But Alfred internally frets! ‘Good grief! The secret elevator to the Batcave is behind that wall! If the commissioner were to accidentally trigger the sliding panel—’

He suggests, “Begging your pardon, sir! May I suggest it would hang much better over here—?” Gordon agrees, saying that Alfred knows best. Although, he's shown to be secretly suspicious at Alfred's nervous mannerisms. They hang the banter and Gordon chimes, “Not a bad job for two old goats, eh, Alfred? Now I must call the airport and see if Kathy Kane's flight will be on time — may I?” He reaches for a rotary phone and Alfred responds, albeit completely dubiously, “Why... er... of course, sir! All the phones are in working order! I shall be in the kitchen, preparing the hors d'oeuvres!”

However Batman's butler never makes it to the kitchen! He spies on Gordon from around the corner of a wall and thinks, ‘The unmarked button on that telephone is Batman's hot line to the commissioner's office! A capable detective like himself will be intrigued by the signal it gives off if he hits that button!’ Meanwhile Gordon contemplates to himself, ‘Wonder why Alfred's so uptight—? 'course, it could be the surprise party — and yet... Hmmm... An unmarked line — what?!’ Gordon hits the unmarked button again and again (and again) until it loudly beeps! Alfred thinks to himself, ‘This is a sticky wicket! I've got to think like The Batman — to keep the commissioner from stumbling onto the master's identity or this really will be a surprise party!’

He slips behind the grandfather's clock that secretly leads to the Batcave! And though he is not the quick-change artist that The Batman is — only scant seconds tick off until he emerges in a dark sweater, green pants, and boots. He has a dark beanie on and a bandana over his lower face to disguise himself as a burglar. He plots, ‘Now to keep the commissioner occupied — with a merry chase!’ as Gordon starts to look at the wall from earlier. He thinks, ‘I'd never snoop around like this if anyone were here — but Alfred acted so awfully strange about this wall—’ but before he can investigate any futher, Alfred bursts out of no where in his burglar costume! The commissioner shouts, “Freeze, mister! What are you doing here? Stop — in the name of the law!’ He internally chides himself, ‘Hmmph! Never thought I'd hear myself talking like one of those tv-lawmen!’

Gordon muses that he's glad he kept in good shape since it won't be easy chasing that prowler before tackling the supposed burglar! In reality, Alfred ends up hitting his head! Gordon thinks, ‘How about that! I've still got the old oomph!’ before having his self esteem crushed by being kicked in the head by Alfred. The butler scrambles to get on his feet to escape before Gordon can unmask him and reflects that, evidently, this wasn't as good as a five second plan as he initially thought it would be. He flees from the backdoor to lure Gordon outdoors! The commissioner thinks, ‘Sure wish I still carried my service revolver! A warning shot might convince him to surrender!’ but starts chasing the burglar on foot anyways! They disappear through the woods and eventually, Gordon has to condemn himself for losing trail of him and how the Batman would never make a similar error.

But at last, both men return to the manor. Alfred pants as he leans against the grandfather clock and reflects, ‘I'm not a youngster anymore! But luckily, I made my way to the Batmobile exit from the Batcave — and got back here before the commissioner! And speaking of the devil...’ He straightens up and greets, “Ah, commissioner! Been out looking over the grounds?” Gordon corrects him, “Chasing a burglar, Alfred — but he got away!” Alfred forges frightened shock! “A burglar? Good gracious I'd best check the silver!” Gordon reassures him, “Don't bother! I ‘surprised’ him before he could rip off anything!”

Alfred awkwardly suggests, “Should I... er... call the police?” But a panel pointedly shows Commissioner Gordon noticing Alfred's change in footwear and that it's the same shoe that kicked him earlier. He shuts down the idea, “No...It'd be a waste of time! That's one burglar I doubt we'll ever see again!” But before Alfred can clumsily get out of the situation, a voice calls out and thankfully interrupts them!

“Hello — anybody home?” Alfred rushes to greet the new guest, “Master Dick — and Miss. Lori!” Dick Grayson smiles as he carries a present wrapped in pink paper and a matching and a paper bag! He asks, “How are things going? It's almost time for the other guests to arrive.” Before Alfred can answer, Dick eagerly continues, “I brought some more decorations — so let's get this show on the road!” Lori volunteers to help Alfred in the kitchen!

At 6:30 P.M. a shiny red sports car pulls in front of the manor! In it, Bruce Wayne and news photographer Vicki Vale Powers step out! Bruce is wearing a black turtleneck as Vicki is in a two piece pink dress and matching jacket. He charmingly offers his hand to help her out of the luxurious car and suavely asks her, “What's your husband going to say when he finds out you came to this big, dark house alone with me — your ex-boyfriend?” She reassures him, “It's one of the hazards of the job, Bruce! Besides, I need the pictures tonight for my photo-feature on the ‘stately homes of Gotham’!

Bruce escorts her inside while helping her out of her jacket. He starts to tell her, “I sure hope what you shoot is worth the—” but his shameless flirting is cut short by the reveal of a room filled with guest! They shout surprise and start to sing happy birthday to him as Vicki proceeds to introduce Bruce to her husband, Tom Powers. He tells Bruce he's glad to ‘know’ him before Vicki continues to talk, “Bruce, I was hoping a special friend of yours would be here — The Batman!” But before Bruce can respond, Gordon speaks up! “Don't let it bother you, Vicki! The Batman is here — in spirit! Right, Bruce? Dick? Alfred?” He looks at Alfred as he talks as the three men stare at him in shocked silence!

END ID]

#hbd bruce sorry ur grandpoppy butler is stealing ur special friend/silver fox AND cockblocked you getting ur dick wet ://#but theres SO much here #all the ways gordon and alfred talk about each other #bruces 'special friend' batman #bruce being FULLY willing to fuck a married woman (which he does do at a later date)#him getting cockblocked by a birthday party #it was exhausting but i HAD to pump this out for his birthday. you get sad birthday boy AND blueballed birthday man #hm...#alfgordon #<- dont mind me just thinkin....#crypt's panels #bruce wayne #transcrypts #alfred pennyworth #jim gordon #dick grayson

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