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bunji-enthusiast · 3 months

Note

Hi hello! Idk if your request is currently open or not, but I'd like to request a fic where the Reader is a member of the Smiling Critters, they're still alive due to Catnap's fondness of them. They're on his side but hate it, only doing it in exchange that Dogday wouldn't get hurt.

With Catnap's permission, they would visit Dogday and give him whatever food they could find ( let's say Catnap still has some fondness for Dogday inside of him ) but with limitations.

You can change the idea into how you prefer! Thank you in advance :D

Ps. Mind adding a scene where Dogday calls the Reader " Angel " and reminisces about Catnap's fondness for both of them? I hope it makes sense, I just melt seeing Dogday calling us Angel :'D

Here We Stay

Note || KSJSJSJD I loved writing this, everything makes sense :D My apologies I took so long to write this! Kinda short too but UUHHHHH-

WC || 1,176

Sypnosis || being a member of the Smiling Critters meant you would’ve died one way or another, but you didn’t. Now all you can do is hope for the best.

One of the worst possible things could be corporate greed, even just having good intentions yet the worst execution is a plausible answer. Just how could you be forced into this situation? Trying to make things worth Catnap’s while is harsh, the only reason you knew you were alive right now was merely because he was particularly fond of you and DogDay alike. He wasn’t the same after the fact the Prototype’s reign began, you weren’t aware of much yourself, so all of this was just plain scary to you.

All your friends just disappeared and died, some of which you didn’t know was happening. You only got all that information because of DogDay.

You hated the circumstance he was put in, it seemed so painful for one’s legs to be severed and just hung up there the way he is now.

Repeatedly however, DogDay has assured you he didn’t mind being like this so long as you were in good health. He couldn’t bear knowing he wouldn’t be able to do a single thing for one of the only friends he has left. So many of his friends were gone already, DogDay would elect to die for you if it meant you would live.

Truth be told, you had only exchanged the peace you had before so that DogDay would not get hurt anymore then he already has. Catnap had full will and the power to completely end your life otherwise, you just were scared.

Sometimes when you could, you would take a look at the broken clock that had somehow still worked like normal–and think about what time it would be in the day–Is it nighttime? How about daytime. Oh how you wished you weren’t subject to things the way they are now, all because of the wretched rules of humans and even the abject rulings of the Prototype himself.

Why would Catnap even view that silly toy as a god anyway? Perhaps that was for him to know, and for you to find out. Once, your life isn’t in any danger any longer. Just maybe it will be possibly any hour now, one can only hope.

Trying to scrounge the Factory for any possible food was getting harder and harder every hour, one could argue it may be the stupid little mice stealing those last precious crumbs away. You would argue it would be the little Wuggies, those small toys were objectively brisk–and limpid too (colors so closely related within the walls of the factory, you forget sometimes they are even there).

You try hard to not forget where you are, in order to get back to DogDay with food for him. That was the only reason you were even anywhere else and away from your sunny friend, you would still be close to him any chance you get on account of Catnap’s permission.

You wished otherwise.

“Ugh!” Groaning, you step over the possible weak spots that would have you falling through the floor. “There has to be food around here somewhere..” You mention, notioning to the fact you had now stepped into an office. There would be bound to be food here!

With an ounce of hope, you began scrounging the office for any possible heaps of food that you find. Ruffling through any drawers and papers, this office seemed to be a mess. You paid no mind to the messes anyway, there are bound to be messes since the last ten years in Playtime Co.

“Success! Haha!” You triumphantly hold a bundle of donuts in your hand, “Take that Hour of Joy!”

Winding down from your self inflated permeated success, you began making your way back to DogDay. You’d have to speak to Catnap to get to him first unfortunately, you always hated this part. Nonetheless, it was necessary.

You picked up the phone, already dialing Catnap to inform him of current conditions. You carefully had curated your words, you always did this when you spoke to him which ever way.

His deep voice rumbled soundly in your ears, “Food, for him?”

“Yes.” You silently groan, kicking a benign rock stubble as you stand around while awaiting his confirmation. Why the hell was he so scary to you? Though, Catnap’s voice was oddly reassuring when he spoke without malcontent. For a moment, there was a long pause.

You swore you could hear someone screaming and pleading to the giant purple cat; you felt bad for the unlucky victim that had crossed paths with Catnap.

“...” Then the phone hung up, you sighed a breath of relief that you could visit DogDay. Many things you would do for him just aside visiting, was having to loop in Catnap on whatever the contents of the material you would bring in hand with you. You knew the cat well enough his pause of silence meant yes.

Well, you can go now at least. You don’t even want to recount the last time you had brought something to DogDay without telling Catnap.

You stepped over the rubble that had led up to the heretic altar, you recognize he is one of the many dubbed a heretic, you truly wished he wasn’t in so much pain this way. Though immediately another thought crossed your mind.

This hallway needed some serious cleaning up to do.

A strained voice pulled you from your thoughts, “You didn’t have to bring anything my friend.” DogDay was being positive about you as per usual, you sighed as you stepped up to him then sat down as your legs were weary and tired.

“DogDay we are friends, I’d do anything for you.” You motion, taking out a donut so you could feed it to him. Though in a rare few circumstances you were allowed to free DogDay’s hands so he could eat himself. Unfortunately it was not one of those circumstances. He took a willing bite, chewing it up as he savored it.

For a moment, he wasn’t sure how to articulate anything, “Do you, remember how he was before… Angel?” DogDay was still mournfully thinking about Catnap’s old self, which he had every right to do. Knowing someone for as long as you would, then that someone changing so drastically–especially not in a good way–can be startling.

You fed him another bite of the donut you held in your hand, “How could I forget? He was quite silent, sure enough. But he was always considering each and every one of us.” You nod with a tilted head. Oh, if you had the chance to turn back the clock and change things, you would’ve done it all in a heartbeat.

Sincerely, you were scared. Scared for Catnap, scared for DogDay. All your possibly living friends you know are still alive.

You grin slightly, wanting to alleviate the conversation and change the subject, “You might need a cleaning.” DogDay couldn’t help but bark–reminiscent of laughter–at your words. He shifted himself noticeably, most likely to bear the weight from one end to another. And remove the discomfort for a little bit before it would dare come back.

“You may be right, my angel.”

"One can only hope."

#poppy playtime #poppy playtime chapter 3 #poppy playtime x reader #dogday poppy playtime #x reader #ah he’s so cute #I’m MELTINGGGF

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keeksandgigz · 4 months

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hi i am here with a horny thot. 😈

eddie buying witchy one of those dildos made of rose quartz and making her fuck herself with it while he watches.

MARIAH THE WAY I RAN TO MY LAPTOP

Horny hours indeed omg

"Eddie this is stupid" you say, huffing at the sight of the suggestively shaped crystal on your counter.

He claimed he had a surprise for you. He had you close your eyes while he stood behind you. He put it in front of you while you opened your eyes, a puzzled look on your face.

"It's rose quartz, witchy. S'gonna make your pussy love me so much, huh?" he's relentless in the way that he touches you. The way he knows that if he grazes your shoulders with the tips of his fingers he can have you whimpering in a matter of seconds.

Hands, fingers, mouth, tongue.

"It looks... cold" you look at it with a raised eyebrow, a bit offended at the idea that Eddie has boiled down your witchy interests down to sex. A pink rose quartz dildo on the kitchen counter.

"Warm it up then" he says, biting your earlobe. You sigh. He always has to win.

And so you guide him to your room, shedding yourself of your clothes in the process, aside from a pair of black knit knee socks that your pervert of a boyfriend seems to enjoy a little too much.

He perches himself on the pink brocade armchair in the corner of your room, the rose quartz tight in your hand.

"Need me to warm you up, witchy?" he asks, smug and annoying as always. A devilish smile on his lips as you shyly lay yourself down on your silk sheets, back against your headboard.

You don't need to be warmed up. You'd been ready to go since that morning, when he'd worn a cutoff shirt with a pair of sweats that were hung low on his tummy, letting his happy trail peek through the fabric.

You shake your head.

His demeanor is different than his recent submissiveness. Eyes dark and alert, contrasting yours- hazy and half- lidded.

"Gimme a show then, my pretty witch" he commands, his hands gripping the armrests of the seat as he watches you run the crystal down your body. The coldness of the surface makes your skin jump, leaving goosebumps in its wake.

Your eyes don't leave his for a moment, as it reaches the apex of your thighs, you shudder at the cold object, and at how sensitive you are.

It is by no means as big as your boyfriend is, but the idea of the heavy object being inside you makes your clench around the feeling of nothingness.

"God, witchy, you're so fucking hot like this." He's palming himself through his jeans, the impatience of seeing you play with the crystal seems to be eating him alive.

"C'mon put it in" he urges, as his belt clinks open, and almost like a pavlovian training, your mouth opens a little bit. Enough for him to notice.

"My strong and powerful witchy brought down by me taking my cock out. Aren't you sweet" he chuckles, taking his dick out, letting it rest against his tummy.

His chin moves, urging you to put the crystal in. A wordless command, no more playing around. You oblige, and the feeling of it filling you up, with the cold surface of the object against the warmth of your walls provides a pleasurable contrast as you begin to fuck yourself with it.

"How's that feel, witchy? Is your pussy falling in love yet, or do I gotta give it a couple kisses first?" he taunts you, beginning to touch himself at the sight of you relentlessly fucking yourself.

You don't like the way that it's not curved, unable to hit the spot you so deeply crave. So you whine, the stretch of it so delicious you can't help but keep going, albeit it not being enough.

"Eddie- oh- please" you hiccup, looking at the way he's stroking himself, head thrown in pleasure as you're tempted to take advantage of his distraction to use your magic, to match up the thrusting movements of your hand to match up his. Perfectly in sync.

You decide against it, as his distraction is only momentary. His eyes are fixed on yours once again. A sheen of sweat on his naked torso, a lusty Adonis, as you try to thrust the quartz further inside you, eliciting a weak moan from your mouth, as an unabashed hand comes down to play with yourself.

A broken moan coming from your boyfriend, hooded eyes looking at you through his sweaty bangs.

"Witchy, you should see yourself. You look like a fucking goddess, Jesus Christ" he whispers through gritted teeth as he lets his cock go, standing up and walking towards you.

You stop with him, intrigued by the change in action. You stare at him with glassy eyes, begging him to make you feel better than the quartz inside you.

"Let's see how in love that pussy is, shall we?" he chuckles, dipping his hand in between your legs, taking the object out. You shiver at the feeling and the feeling of being empty.

A low whistle comes from Eddie.

"God, she must love me, huh? This thing is soaked. M'flattered, witchy" he says, examining the crystal.

You can't do nothing but shake, as he stands there and ponders.

"Open up that mouth, messy girl. Gotta keep it busy while I fuck you."

God i don't know what this is I'm so sorry

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #stranger things #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x you #eddie munson fan fiction #eddie munson blurb #eddie munson x fem!reader smut #eddie munson x witchy!reader #witchyverse #moots🫶🏻#mariah 🪐#keeksgetsasks!

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mrzombielover · 1 year

Text

— könig relationship headcanons

rating; sfw and nsfw

warnings: nsfw, virginity, this is just filthy and not really edited and a spew of random disconnected thoughts

a/n; oh my actual god tysm for 1k+ likes on my ghost drabble i did NOT expect any attention so thank you😭

to get in a relationship with this guy you def had to make the first move, he’s too shy to do anything

(i’ll prob make separate headcanons w him pining over you tbh)

but once you ARE in a relationship? man

his severe social anxiety manifests in a way that just makes him really awkward. like🧍

clingiest boyfriend alive, mf like 6’10 250 lbs clinging to your arm when u go in public and asking you to order for him

doesn’t know what to do with himself when you’re not there. you leave and he just waits for you to come back.

he just loves you so much, he’s not stupid by all means but you’re the one that thinks for him and he’s happy w that arrangement

likes when you refer to him as big guy or esp YOUR big guy bc yes. he is a big guy. thanks for noticing :)

while he couldn’t be a sniper bc of his size, there are some perks to his height. namely scaring the ever loving fuck out of any guy he may be jealous of

he’s not vocal and much too shy to really do anything but he will stand over your shoulder vaguely threateningly glaring at the guy.

he’s incredibly easy to fluster, part of the reason he likes wearing a mask is because you won’t be able to see how easy it is to make him blush

this is heightened in public places, because of his shy nature any type of pda drives him crazy and he gets wound up very quickly

gently touch his arm or chest when talking to him, put a hand on his shoulder or thigh when laughing, get his attention touching the back of his neck, literally any of the tamest touch will have his face and ears all hot and red.

not just touching him, either, just existing as hot as you are in his presence makes him stiff.

doesn’t talk a lot in general, and i don’t think that changes in bed. he’s a quiet person, so treasure the groans you do get to hear

down so horrendous

everyone knows the quiet guys are the hung ones

and man is he PACKIN

i hope you have a size kink because everything about him is huge, from his stature to his muscles to his cock

i’m thinking upwards of 8 inches, insanely thick and a deep reddish color, tip color #b3505e

due to his anxiety and quiet nature, he has had extremely little experience with relationships and sex. he was bullied in school, and i can’t imagine him having a lot of practice before meeting you

my little meow meow so easily flustered and blushing bright red the whole time

his thoughts are probably “oh my god oh fuck wow holy oh my god oh my god” and he can’t form any real sentences or coherent thoughts

probably busts prematurely and then he’s so embarrassed, would freak out about it until you calm him down and tell him it’s okay

then he’d make it up to you

what he’s lacking in experience he makes up for with eagerness, he’s a fast learner and attentive to detail

gives AMAZING head. once he learns how you like it it’s over for you. has his head buried between your thighs for hours, and his tongue in combination with thick fingers splitting you open will have your legs shaking and you crying

if you ever don’t want to sit on his face for fear of hurting him or hover above instead of putting your weight on him he looks at you like >:((

leans towards the submissive side, will do anything you want him to do and is down to experiment

when it comes to what HE wants tho… he is much too shy to ask to try stuff out it takes a lot of courage u might need to infer some things

enjoys being submissive the majority of the time but there are times when he gets so wound up and desperate he’ll just take you how he wants (lord have mercy…)

in these situations i imagine it’s probably been a bit since you’ve last had the chance to be… intimate. naturally you take it upon yourself to tease him whenever given the chance, trying your hardest to make him blush

he also has an extremely high sex drive, he’s an absolute beast of a man and can go for 2-3 rounds without break. just crazy amounts of stamina and strength. this in combination with you teasing him means you’re really in for it the second you have some alone time

no matter how much you weigh he could pick you up and handle you like a rag doll. he is HUGE and insanely strong as previously mentioned

in conclusion just big and strong and very much loving and protective in his own weird 🧍 way

**these will be elaborated on soon trust i plan on doing nsfw alphabets for the whole task force + my boy

masterlist

#my little meow meow #!my stuff #konig x reader #call of duty #call of duty x reader #könig #könig x reader

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steddieas-shegoes · 1 year

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Eddie doesn’t understand how his laundry always gets done.

When he first moved in with Wayne, laundry was his chore to do, so he did his and Wayne’s every Saturday for years.

Then Wayne started doing his own, and Eddie did his own. When he remembered. Which was usually only when he was staring at empty dresser drawers and stacks of dirty clothes on his floor.

But since spring break, since Vecna, since the hospital stay, someone has been doing his laundry.

He thought it was Wayne at first, probably just happy to have Eddie alive at home and not caring about having to do extra loads to keep his clothes clean.

But then Wayne went away for five days to fill in at a plant in Chicago, and his laundry still got washed and put away.

The only people who’d been at his house were Dustin (no way he was doing laundry without expecting something in return), Robin (did she even know how to do laundry?), and Steve (he wasn’t exactly the type to just do an acquaintance’s laundry).

So who was it?

Of course, he found out exactly who it was because his washing machine broke in the most comical way possible.

It was barely six in the morning on Saturday, and Eddie was woken up by a loud bang, a yelled “FUCK ME!”, and a surge of electricity. He would’ve been more angry about being woken up if he didn’t run right into Steve when he opened his bedroom door to see what was going on.

“Uh. Hi?”

“Do not ask questions. Do not. But your washing machine is broken.”

“Okay?”

“Is Wayne gonna be home soon?”

“Should be within the hour.”

“Good. Okay. Good. He can fix it. Your favorite Metallica shirt definitely can be saved.”

“What do you mean?”

“Uh. It’s eating the clothes? Or trying to. I think I got most of them but the Metallica shirt is really in there.”

“Wait.” Steve?! This whole time is was Steve Harrington doing his laundry? “It’s been you.”

“What?”

“Doing my laundry. I was starting to think it was a leprechaun or something.”

“That’s really stupid. How would a leprechaun even be able to reach the knobs to start the cycle?”

Eddie couldn’t help it, he laughed. Steve was being so serious.

“Oh god, I love you.”

Oh. Wait a second. No. Not that. That’s not what he meant.

Steve’s face was so red, Eddie could swear he felt heat coming off of it even from more than a foot away.

“Um.”

“Sorry. Just. Well I don’t have an explanation for that one.”

“I know you didn’t mean it, it’s okay.”

“Wait.” Eddie was going to make this worse. He had to stop. “I did mean it. I just didn’t mean to say it out loud.”

“You love me? You barely know me. I just broke your washing machine and possibly ruined your favorite Metallica shirt.”

“I know you. And those are replaceable things. You’ve been doing my laundry Steve. You’ve brought my favorite beer once a week for months. You let me host Hellfire at your house even though you’ve never played and probably never will. You make us cookies! You let me pick the music in the car. You let me pick movies for movie night even though I know you hate what I pick. You’re at my house before the sun is up washing my dirty clothes in secret so I don’t have to. What’s not to fuckin’ love?”

“I guess…everything else?”

Eddie shook his head. He grabbed Steve’s hand and led him to the washing machine, smirking at the pile of still-wet clothes sitting in the dryer next to it and the Metallica shirt hanging out of the washing machine.

“That washing machine is older than Wayne possibly. You got one at your house, right?”

“Uh. Yeah.”

“Great. Put my stuff in a basket and let’s go to yours.”

Steve kept doing Eddie’s laundry. Every Saturday morning before he had to go to work, he threw their clothes into the washing machine at his house.

Eddie always watched from on top of the machine, giving Steve a kiss on the forehead when he was done.

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #headcanon #not sorry for this #domestic fluff #housewife steve but not even until Eddie points it out #idk I’m finishing a paper for school and this was more important

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thechekhov · 4 months

Text

Dungeon Meshi Quick Reacts

CH.30 (Good Medicine)

I kind of assumed that things would get worse from here...

...yeah, there's no 'but' to that. Getting Falin back so quick was too good to be true.

Aren't those the ghosts Falin talked to? They could be friendly.

"ee gads! a hairless little man!" I'd be frightened too if Chillchuck was suddenly behind a door I'd just opened.

Chillchuck, buddy, less than 24 hours ago you threw a knife directly into a dragon's eye. You can take care of some worgs, right?

Senshi's a card carrying member of the smells-okay-to-me-chief club.

Orcs be like 'oh, dragon's gone? Hm. Curious' and then just carry on. Wouldn't you be worried that something took out the dragon? Could be even more dangerous than the dragon itself.

I feel like at this point Falin might be just that.

MOUTH TO MOUTH RESUSCITATION!

Marcille, I don't think you have a lot of options.

......just realized those moose antlers are holding up her rack. Talk about a pushup bra. Damn. Respect.

Wait go back to that "create monsters to do their bidding" thing again. Was that the little mini dragons or does that include larger monsters like the dragon itself?!

OR something that was IN the dragon, controlling its actions and make it act irrationally? Is that why the Sorcerer wasn't surprised to see Falin as a separate thing outside the dragon? Was the assumption that whatever THING it was had escaped and become Falin?

And for all we know... it kinda had. It had merged with her spirit....

Or maybe I'm way off.

Congrats on the larger story plot! :D You're now in even more danger! Hoorah!

Chillchuck, a normal person would just go 'I'm leaving, pay me'. You're giving yourself away, worrying for them.

I can't hate him for the reasoning here. The deeper you go, the less likely you are to be found. The only person who cares enough about Marcille and Laios and Chillchuck to find their bodies are.... each other. So if they're dead here, they're likely dead-dead.

I want to nestle into her bosom and live there as a little creature.

Moreso than when she was literally in the gullet of a red dragon?! Come on, be reasonable. At least she's alive now. And remembers who she is.

Ooooh friendly ghosts. Makes sense why Falin was so chill about them.

All the more reason to believe there's something to be done!

Love the doggo yawning behind Chillchuck.

He's a coward, but being afraid isn't necessarily a sign of weakness. It's a sign that you realize how dangerous a situation is. Cowardice isn't stupidity, no more than ignorance of danger is bravery.. I think the orc leader is maybe realizing he's not doing it for completely selfish reasons. Mad respect to her though.

It WAS Falin, wasn't it? It wasn't as if it was a thing pretending to be her. She was there, and she was revived successfully, and then the soul confusion thing happened.

......damn. What a small holiday they got, before the next horrible thing happened...

hey, Marcille is not dumb! She's got loads of braincells! they're just all focused on doing evil stuff and being gay.

🎯

That's right! It's just like you, Chillchuck!

Was that... there before?

Oh, okay, no, it was. Hm.......

This stupid man is about to full a Falin and jump out a window to go look for her, isn't he.

Gods, this sucks for him so much. For all of them. Because they.... they WERE successful! They rescued Falin! They brought her back from the head! They DID that!

But now, instead of getting the reward of it, she's just gone. Is it better, because she's alive?

Or worse, because the threat is even more nebulous?

If they all died, would it be worth it?

who's the coward...? he's ready to go back.

For Falin, they went down there. They risked themselves.

For them, after talking to him only a bit, the orc leader went from 'hey, nice snack for my dog' to 'we're helping you get that girl back'.

It's about the CONNECTION!!! IT'S ABOUT HELPING EACH OTHER AFTER LEARNING TO UNDERSTAND ONE ANOTHER!!!

#chekhov reads dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #dungeon meshi liveblog

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roseytoesy · 11 months

Text

Vore trope list

Screw it I’ve been looking for a list of vore tropes and stuff and can’t seem to find any! so you know what I’m going to make my own.

(Almost all of these I imagine as safe or has the option to be safe.)

Feel free to use this as an ask game too!

Story tropes:

Knight in shining armor (protection vore)

A heroic meal (protection vore but eating the bad guy)

Dragons sacrifice (poor soul(s) offered to a monster)

A bet (stupid idea + pride leads to shenanigans)

Feral/ lost to instincts (pred looses control of themselves)

Oh no you don’t! (Pred keeping prey from doing something stupid)

Tummy time out (prey annoyed/upset pred too much and ended in tummy as punishment)

Extreme cuddling (just as it says. both wanna be cozy together and what better way than inside a tum?)

dentist (thorough cleaning but with its own risks of being eaten due to being within a mouth)

vore spa day (covered in delicious smelling oils and products and given a deep massage deep into a pred)

magic! (Potions or spells making this small and safe)

sci-fi (aliens and other biological/scientific shenanigans leading to vore)

willingly “sacrificed” to a god

food play (from noodles to cakes and icecream get creative and have fun!)

Saved from drowning (merfolk or lifeguard making sure someone gets the air they need inside where they will be safe)

fearful (I don’t like the sound of fearplay)

cat and mouse games (pred having fun while the prey may or may not, depending)

hide and eat (hide and seek but the seeker is very hungry~)

Any taur vore (from nagas to centaurs, to driders, to anything you can think of!)

multiple stomaches (a safe one/storage and one not so safe one maybe)

slimes (pred or prey they can be both!)

edible clones (best way to remove extras is to eat them!)

high vore (they either got high from the prey or the pred was high and got munchy)

dinner dates (ending with an amazing prey dessert to finish off a successful date)

inexperienced/first time (weather it’s pred or prey is so good)

shy (either pred or prey struggle to ask.)

casual (just walk up to friend and say I want in. Or can I have a snack for a bit. Shrug and relax for an hour or two)

kidnapping (best way to ensure transportation and that they won’t get away)

object vore (from a small key to a fricken box tv. The bulges are always a fun plus)

Come and get it~ (pred ate item/person prey needs so they have to go down to get it)

sick (pred needs something to settle their stomach, or prey wants to hide away from the world and their troubles.)

comfort (help ground a pred during a panic attack. Help hide prey from anxieties)

A different form of love (other species licking and gently swallowing their loved ones as signs of affection.)

healing vore (stomach juices heal things alive and break apart anything dead.)

tough soft guy. (Scary/intimidating with a soft spot for one special prey.)

multiple prey (weather the pred was gluttonous or overwhelmed both are good.)

super willing and unwilling (pred excited to nom someone and they are not ok with it. And a super willing prey where the pred is somewhat worried/freaked out)

VIP (very important prey, gets a nice backstage show ending in a belly.)

sleep eating (pred had a nice dream about eating a marshmallow. Where’s their pillow/prey??)

another world (maybe somewhere where this is normal)

betrayal (prey gets gobbled up by friend and feels betrayed that they were nothing more than a meal/snack to who they thought they could trust.)

always close (pred hugging belly close or always having a hand over their precious cargo)

experiments! (Scientists doing things inside just because they are curious!)

overprotective (either pred or prey but they are possessive of their friend they aren’t allowed to be eaten by/eat anyone else!)

teasing (being charismatic or using double meaning words to get a snack or message across~)

domestic (a happy couple/ roommates sharing some nomes after cleaning together or getting things settled from the days adventures.)

robot (safely store items and prey at optimal temperatures and in a safe environment until threat has passed, or scans are completed, etc)

mine! (Hoarding things where NOONE can get to without their permission)

strings/equipment included (keeping prey on something to help them get out, though it may or may not fail depending on the pred)

demons deal (you got what you want and what they want in return is a nice meal~)

drink addition (prey floating in a drink and going down to their own special pool)

hot and cold (hot belly’s for cold days and cool belly’s for hot days)

It was an accident! (Took a tumble right down someone’s throat?! Or they didn’t notice someone in their drink)

Other:

Same size

half size

g/t

micro

cat size

willing

unwilling

squirming

switch

pred

prey

reformation

goopy/ painless digestion

fatal/perminant

oral

belly mouth

tail

Vore to endosoma

Half/full tour clean

dream vore

energy sapping

bulging stomach

hammer space stomach/ pocket dimension belly

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sourwolf-sterek32 · 3 months

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The Dirt (Your Version)

Summary: Meeting Nikki Sixx and Tommy Lee was a coincidence. Being friends was a choice. But falling in love with them both was beyond your control.

A rewrite of The Dirt with all the highs and lows of Mötley Crüe from your perspective.

Pairings: Nikki Sixx x Reader, Tommy Lee x Reader, Nikki Sixx x Tommy Lee x Reader

Word Count: 3.1k

Trigger warning- substance abuse, drug overdose, descriptions of drug paraphernalia.

Previous Chapter

A/N: I've added a few paragraphs from Nikki Sixx's book 'The Heroin Diaries'. So, if you don't want to read Nikki's real words just skip past the paragraphs written in italics throughout this chapter. No judgement if you choose not to read them because Nikki's book hit hard, and I cried like a baby.

Chapter 14- The Heroin Diaries

You awoke the following morning after finally managing to fall asleep sometime during the early hours of the morning. The glass shards in your knees had been taken out and bandaged and there was now a blanket draped over you which definitely hadn't been there earlier.

"Hey." Vince's voice said gently.

You blinked, looking around realising that you were on the couch and your brother was leaning against the wall watching you with a small smile.

Why the fuck was he smiling? Nikki was fucking dead and-

"He's alive."

What?

No. This had to be a dream. You were still asleep because Nikki Sixx died last night. He was gone.

You shook your head, tears rising in your eyes, "don't... don't lie to me."

"No, no." Vince rushed across the room and knelt beside you on the couch. "Doc called. Nikki just left the hospital after pulling tubes out his nose and tearing the IV out his arm and telling everyone to fuck off."

Your jaw dropped in a mixture of shock and relief.

"Doc said he walked out with only a pair of leather pants on." Vince added like that piece of information was important. But you were barely listening to anything else too caught up on the fact that Nikki wasn't fucking dead.

"Oh my God." You whispered sitting up on the couch as tears of utter relief trickled down your face. "He's alive?" You double checked.

Vince nodded, "Nikki is alive."

You were on your feet in an instant nearly barrelling your brother over in your haste to put your shoes on.

"Whoa, where are you going?" Vince asked following you towards the front door as you slipped on your boots.

"To find him."

You grabbed your car keys and was out the door before your brother could say anything else. You pushed the speed limit by double as you sped across town to his house which was probably stupid, but in that moment, you were not thinking about anything else other than finding Nikki and making sure he was alive and had gotten home from the hospital.

He had been living in a house at Valley Vista Boulevard in Van Nuys. Doc referred to it as the 'Heroin Den' which you hated with a passion, but it was probably true. It had been years since you were last inside his house. Nikki never invited you over and you knew it had to do with his drug addiction, so you had no idea what to expect when you arrived.

There was a new 10-foot-tall security fence surrounding the house with a steel barred gate at the front. You pressed the button for the intercom, but as suspected there was no answer. Taking a stab in the dark for the pin code, you keyed in 666 and shouldn't have been surprised when it actually worked.

You made a mental note to lecture Nikki on his home security at a later date. Right now, there were more important things to focus on.

You waited impatiently for the steel gate to slide open before you hit the gas and sped up the stupidly long driveway, skidding to a halt in front of the house and rushing to the door.

"Nikki?!" You shouted knocking on the door while frantically pressing the doorbell.

You waited for a moment before knocking again but there was no answer.

Damnit, Nikki.

You tried the door handle, but it was locked.

Typical.

Glancing around the front porch your eyes landed on a large stone gargoyle statue by the door. Nikki used to keep his spare key under a similar gargoyle statue, so you stepped over to it and tried to lift it, but it was made of pure stone. There was no lifting this stupid statue. There was however a small hook behind its head and hanging on the hook was the spare key.

Wow. Nikki really needed to up his security around here.

Snatching the key from the back of the statue, you quickly slotted it into the lock and sighed with relief when the door clicked open. You rushed inside and closed it behind you while scanning the living area.

The house had changed a lot since you were last inside these walls. To say Nikki decked out his house was an understatement. Ralph Lauren, crushed velvet comforters, buried walnut antiques, more gargoyles, Persian carpets... it felt as if you had stepped into the 1800s. Even the gate and fence around the house looked medieval.

It was suiting for Nikki Sixx, and not what you were expecting in the slightest. The only problem was the bassist was nowhere to be seen.

"Sixx? Are you here?" You called out, jogging up the stairs taking two at a time. "Sixx?"

His bedroom door was slightly ajar, so you pushed it open cautiously. Clothes and rubbish were scattered over the floor of his room. Empty beer cans and Jack bottles littered his dresser along with empty doggie bags still containing small amounts of white powder.

He wasn't here though.

Where the hell was he?

You vaguely remember him and Tommy telling you once that they both liked to do drugs in their closets. You had found it strange at the time, but they insisted that the small tight spaces made them feel safe because sometimes drugs, especially heroin, made them scared and paranoid.

You turned to the closed door of the bedroom closet and hesitated.

It was more than a closet -it was a safe space, and it was private.

"Sixx?" You tried again, but there was no answer.

Without wasting anymore time, you pulled open the double doors of his closet and your stomach dropped at the sight inside.

Nikki was sprawled out across the floor. A needle still dangled from his arm. The carpet below him was covered with blood. His blood that ran down from the needle point.

He was still wearing his leather pants and no shirt, but his eyes were closed, and his skin was ghostly pale.

"Fuck, Nikki." You hissed, rushing inside trying to ignore all the used needles and drug paraphernalia everywhere as you skidded to your knees beside him.

"Sixx? Hey, hey, can you hear me? Nikki?" You called out, cradling his face in your hands. "C'mon, Sixx. Don't do this to me. Wake up!"

He was smacked out and incoherent, but he was alive.

Nikki was alive.

You reached down and carefully pulled the needle out from his arm and inspected it trying to gauge how much he had taken, but it was impossible to tell. There was still some dark liquid inside the syringe, but you didn't know how much was already in his system.

Should you be calling for an ambulance?

You glanced around the closet not knowing what to do before rushing out his room and into his ensuite turning the shower on cold because that was the only way you knew how to wake someone up.

Dragging Nikki's unconscious body out the closet and across the bedroom was a mission on its own. But you managed to get yourself sitting inside the shower with the bassist held firmly against your chest allowing the cool water to wash over him.

It didn't take long before his eyes snapped open, and he gasped awake. His groggy eyes blinked slowly as if trying to figure out what the fuck had just happened.

You quickly reached up and turned the shower off, your own clothes and hair drenched through and clinging to your body as you shifted him in your lap and cupped his cheek with your hand.

"Hey, are you with me? Nikki?" You asked, caressing his face gently as his drowsy, sunken eyes met yours.

He stared up at you for a moment his brows furrowing as he blinked before the weight of the world crashed into him. The events of everything that had happened flooded over him like waves upon waves beating him down until his blank expression cracked into something utterly broken.

"I-I'm sorry." He said, his rough voice barely above a whisper before tears welled up in his eyes and he cried.

"Shh. It's okay. I got you. It's okay." You soothed, as he curled in on himself in your lap while his body wracked with an onslaught of sobs and tears.

This was a side of Nikki Sixx that you had never seen before. A side nobody had ever seen, and it made your heart shatter seeing him so broken.

You sniffed quietly, tears threatening to spill from your own eyes as you leant down and hugged the bassist in your lap not knowing what else to do except be there for him. Both of you were drench from head to toe and you knew you should get him out of those wet leather pants and into something warmer, but that could wait. Right now, he needed this.

Eventually, you got Nikki out the shower and into a pair of sweatpants and a shirt before helping him into bed. His body was still weak and tired from the drugs. While he slept, you went through his closet, bedroom and entire house, and threw away all the drugs.

You spent hours cleaning. You went through every room, every draw, every cupboard finding all the bindles of coke, pills, booze and syringes, and disposed of the lot. His closet was deep cleaned. The blood and other bodily fluids on the floor cleaned up too. The only things you didn't dispose of were his two guns.

The double-barrel shotgun that had been leaning against the wall of his closet use to belong to his grandfather. It was an old Winchester that dated back to the early 1930s. You knew how valuable it was to Nikki, despite how much you hated him having these weapons when he was drugged out of his mind.

You picked up the 12-gauge carefully and flicked the break action lever cracking the weapon open to find two shells sitting inside.

It was fucking loaded.

Jesus.

You took out the shotgun shells from the barrel and shoved them in your pocket for the time being before stepping out the closet. Nikki was still asleep on the bed, so you walked across his room to the large body mirror on the wall that you knew had a safe built in behind it.

It might have been a while since you were last inside Nikki's house, but some things were still the same. Thankfully.

Grabbing the edge of the mirror you pulled it away from the wall exposing the safe that Nikki had built himself many years ago. You keyed in 666 again because you wouldn't put it past the bassist to use that code for everything, but it didn't work.

You paused staring at the keypad for a moment before trying 1958 and the safe clicked open.

He really shouldn't use his birth year as a safe code. If anyone broke into his house it wouldn't be hard to guess. But, right now, you were glad he did.

After placing the shotgun and two shells inside, you walked over to his bedside table where you had noticed a .357 Magnum was sitting. Pistols were not very familiar to you. Shotguns and rifles were due to the many stupid camping and hunting trips your father would force you and Vince to join him on. So, you knew how to handle those guns, but you didn't know much about pistols.

The Magnum was loaded though, you could see the bullets clearly in the cylinder and had no idea how to eject them. You'd probably be able to work it out but knew better than to fiddle with a loaded weapon. So, you carefully picked it up by the grip and ensured to keep you finger away from the trigger before putting it inside the safe and locking it shut.

Once you were sure there was not a single doggie bag or used needle left in the premises, you switched out your own wet clothes and slipped on one of Nikki's oversized shirts to wear as a dress while you put your drenched clothes into the dryer downstairs.

Upon returning to his bedroom, Nikki was still fast asleep under the blankets. He looked peaceful and younger while asleep, his features more relaxed and at ease, but his skin was still a little pale. While watching the bassist sleep, you noticed a small leather-bound notebook half hidden under the bed.

Curiosity got the better of you and you quietly walked over to the bed and picked it up.

It was an old book. The leather faded and edges torn. It wasn't uncommon for Nikki to walk around with a notepad and pen. He was constantly writing down words and sentences that he would later turn into lifechanging lyrics.

Figuring this was one of his song writing books, you opened to the first page and began to read.

'December 25th 1986 Van Nuys, 7:30pm

I guess I've decided to start another diary this time for a few different reasons... 1. I have no friends left 2. So I can read back and remember what I did the day before. 3. So if I die, at least I have a paper trail of my life (nice lil suicide note).

Merry Christmas... it's just you and me, diary. Welcome to my life.'

Your jaw dropped as you read over the word's realisation hitting you hard. This was Nikki's diary. Nikki Sixx had a diary.

Your eyes shifted from the paper to find the bassist still asleep in bed before you looked back down at the diary in your hands feeling as if you were holding Nikki's entire life in your fingers. Perhaps you kind of were.

Diaries were not meant to be read by other people. They were private. And the fact that Nikki had this hidden under his bed was enough evidence to prove that he did not want anybody ever finding this. You should put it back and pretend it didn't exist. That would be the right thing to do.

But Nikki had just overdosed yesterday. Did he write in his diary yesterday? Has he written in it since being back home from the hospital?

"You're going to hell, Y/N." You whispered to yourself before sitting down on the carpet beside Nikki's bed and flicking through the pages.

You skim read paragraphs here and there before skipping towards the back of the diary and stopped when you reached December of this year, 1987.

You glanced back up at Nikki on the bed. He was still out cold. Guilt swelled in your stomach at what you were about to do, but it wasn't enough to stop you before you began to read through his entries needing to know what happened that resulted in Nikki nearly dying.

'December 16th 1987 Hotel, Tokyo, 2pm

Lately I've been slipping deeper into thoughts of... why? I don't know why, I am just slipping deeper. Some days I don't know how much longer I can hold on, or why I would even want to. You'd think I'd be excited about selling out three nights at the Budokan but I'm rotting inside and all I smell is my putrid past... it haunts me. Maybe to you it would seem like a surface burn but the pain is too deep for surgery.

P.S. I'm so lonely I nearly called Y/N to my hotel room but that wouldn't have been good for either of us. She's still in pain. I see it in her eyes every day. She's drinking more too, but I haven't said anything. That'd be the pot calling the fucking kettle black, right? I wanted to call her into my room though... it must have been the cocaine I got from the Yakuza.'

This was not what you had been expecting to find inside Nikki Sixx's diary, although you weren't exactly sure what you had been expecting in the first place. Maybe some drunken ramblings or dirt on the other bandmembers, but not these soul wrenching words of truth.

Nikki had noticed your drinking. That wasn’t good. Were you really that bad at hiding your feelings?

'December 17th 1987 Hotel, Tokyo, noon

I know I'm dying from depression. I feel like a lost soul... like the only person left on Earth. If I died, would anybody cry? It seems to me by putting myself out of my misery I'd be killing two birds with one stone.'

'December 18th 1987 10pm

Just got offstage. Last show of the year. I don't wanna be on the road and I don't wanna go home. If I go home I'll get strung out again.'

Fuck.

Nikki knew. He fucking knew coming home to this house by himself would end badly.

Tears burned in your eyes as you read Nikki's scribbled writing. You knew Nikki was struggling, but you never realised the full extent of it.

'December 21st 1987 Hotel, Hong Kong, 7pm

I'm alone. It's not nice...

Waves of depression come over me, then anger, then disinterest. I'm already drunk, I guess, if half a bottle of Jack is drunk. I actually don't feel anything, but maybe that's just me.'

'December 23rd 1987 Van Nuys, 9:30am

Unravelling, unsure, underdetermined, unnecessary... this is what my life has boiled down to. I either have to stop or die... I can't straddle this fence any longer. I have taken into my lungs the longest breath of hell and I'm still here.'

The pages were blank after that.

That was the last thing Nikki wrote before overdosing on heroin.

You hadn't realised you were crying until a couple tears splattered onto the paper smudging the ink in two small circles. You quickly closed the diary not wanting to ruin the page before tucking the leather notebook back under the bed where you had found it and looked back up at the bassists sleeping body through teary eyes.

Nikki was practically screaming for help in these diary entries, but nobody knew. Sure, you noticed his addiction getting worse and had even called him out on it, but you didn't know how bad it had gotten.

Why didn't he come to you? You could have helped him. You could have been there for him...

Fresh tears began to spill from your eyes, so you went to the bathroom where Nikki wouldn't be able to hear you cry if he woke up. You sat on the edge of the bathtub leaning forward with your hands on your knees as you sucked in a few deep shaky breaths.

Tears streamed down your face like a river of sadness as you thought about all the pain Nikki had been silently battling with. You continued to cry, and each stifled sob echoed the loud, resounding ache in your heart.

Next Chapter

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If anyone wants to be tagged just let me know

#motley crue #nikki sixx #nikki sixx fanfiction #nikki sixx x reader #nikki sixx x you #tommy lee #tommy lee fanfic #tommy lee x reader #vince neil #mick mars #the dirt #motley crue fanfiction #motley crue x reader #pov #imagine

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fallinforerling · 1 year

Text

LOVE ISN'T ETERNAL. chapter 9 - jb

ೃ⁀➷ jude’s masterlist

ೃ⁀➷ jude’s taglist

ೃ⁀➷ masterlist

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

After being dropped off by Jude’s parents, you stayed on the couch for a good hour thinking about how bizarre the whole day was. You didn’t even want to check your phone right now, so you just left it in your living room and went directly to get a hot shower.

While undressing, you noticed that you had dinner while wearing Jobe’s jersey. Hah, now it made sense why so many people took double looks at you. Not that you cared.

You just wanted to relax for once. The whole process of getting ready for bed got you in a better mood; so after doing your skincare and drinking some tea, you felt ready to check your messages.

There were some texts from the girls and some from Jobe. You went for Jobe’s first since they were the most recent.

✉️ Jobe: Thank you for the weirdest night ever

✉️ You’re welcome?

✉️ Jobe: No, seriously. I haven’t seen Jude this happy for a while now

✉️ Jobe: He’s close to giggling and kicking his feet like a little girl

✉️ lmao

✉️ Maybe that’s because I told him I was going to unblock him

✉️ Jobe: Did you?

✉️ Not yet…

✉️Jobe: Well, maybe you should

✉️ Oh my god??? What’s happening???

✉️ Jobe: I talked to him, just… Maybe? I won’t force you tho

✉️ I’ll consider it

✉️ Jobe: That’s good enough for me… Have a good night, darling

✉️ Good night, sweetie

Odd. What could possibly be happening that Jobe was (kinda) defending his brother? You didn’t blame him, obviously. But… Again, odd. With a shrug, you hopped on the girl’s group chat, which had lots of messages from hours ago.

✉️ Nikki: Weeeeell…. I was casually checking the TikToks people were posting about the game… You know, to see how it was going

✉️ Nikki: THEN… Girl, you went a bit viral agaaaaain. You appeared on the big screen and SOME people saw the little interaction Mr. Jobe and you had. The football fandom is going crazy again, a lot of people are debating if you’re his girlfriend or Gio’s girlfriend

✉️ Mia: Since none of them had said a word about the rumors… People are kinda taking sides

✉️ Mia: I also saw that after the first half some girls were looking for you because they were near your seat and you were gone. Then they noticed you were sitting next to THE Jude Bellingham and went on trying to figure out if you were his girlfriend instead while taking videos and photos to POST?!

✉️ Nikki: MESSY

✉️ Oh god… I just saw this… WHY ME, LORD?!

✉️ It’s like… For each day of peace I get, ten days of absolute chaos are piled up on my door

✉️ Nikki: It’s the drama, the fun, the footballers, the fame

✉️ Nikki: Our beautiful little WAG

✉️ Mia: If it’s not with douchie, it’s with that Gio guy

✉️ Mia: Heʼs hot af

✉️ Mia????

✉️ Do you want his number?

✉️ Nikki: Omg, Miaaaa

✉️ Mia: Both of you… Shut up. This isn’t about me finding Gio the hottest man alive, this is about YOU getting shipped with half of the footballers you know

✉️ Don’t remind me of that, please

✉️ I’ll better get some sleep before the vein on my forehead explodes, bye my loves

✉️ Nikki: Bye baby! Sweet dreams

✉️ Mia: Score a goal!

✉️ Fuck you lmao

Great. You were never getting rid of that stupid “popularity” among the football fanbase… Well, at least among the people that cared about the player’s love lives. They knew your face now, even if the subject of who your “boyfriend” was died down. You were out there forever for people to see and have an opinion.

Time to sleep.

You were on your way to turn off the lights and wash your cup when the telecommunicator started to ring; you almost let out a scream. Who on Earth was ringing your house at two A.M?! With your heart beating like crazy, you ran to answer and yell to the jerk on the other side.

“Miss! I’m so sorry to bother you this late but…” Mel’s words were interrupted by some loud male voices. “There’s a couple of gentlemen asking me to allow them into your floor…” Oh, poor Mel.

You couldn't scream to your sweet doorman Mel.

“Mel! Hi... Gentlemen? As... Men asking to come here?” This was unbelievable.

“Yes, uh. They'd been here for at least ten minutes. I'd tried to persuade them into leaving but nothing works."

“Do you happen to recognize these gentlemen?” Your gut feeling was very reliable, so you kinda knew who it was.

“Well… I’m not so sure about it, but I think that’s… Bukayo Saka and Jude Bellingham, miss.”

He surely knew them at first sight, but it was adorable he was trying to dissimulate it.

“Oh, my god…” You sighed. When was this going to end? “Just… Let them in, Mel.”

“As you wish.”

You wanted to punch someone so bad right now. But you just stayed there, by your door, waiting for what seemed to be the night of never end.

No less than five minutes later, your door was being punched at. Because that wasn't a knock. You considered for a moment letting them outside, but you weren't going to sleep if you did that.

When you opened it, the silliest sight welcomed you. There was Bukayo, a mutual friend that you haven't seen in very long, carrying (if you can call that carrying) a very drunk Jude. How did you know he was drunk? Well, he was (seemingly) asleep against Bukayo's side, only kept from falling because of his friend's arm around his waist.

“Okay...” Was the first thing that came out of your mouth. “This is... Something.”

“So sorry to do this at such late hours... He's been so insistent. He got a bit too drunk and started to ask about where his girlfriend was and that he wanted to come home.” Bukayo's eyes went blank, sighing. He seemed pretty sober to you. “I tried to persuade him into visiting you tomorrow, but this guy never takes no for an answer.”

“That sounds like him.” You smiled at him apologetically. Because what else could you do? No one knew you two had broken up, and this wasn't the best moment to break the news either. “Let's take him to the couch, I'll help you.”

You got closer, feeling the smell of alcohol reeking from Jude. Iugh. You took one of his arms, putting it around your shoulders. Hah, and just a couple of hours earlier you were trying to avoid just that. With a lot of effort, both of you laid him out the best you could. That didn't mean that it was done in the most careful way. So he woke up, looking at you and then at Bukayo.

“Am I dreaming, mate?”

“Nah, fam. I did what you asked me; I took you to your girl.” He palmed Jude's arm and then smiled at you. “Now I'm out, this whole thing tired me up.”

“That's okay. Thank you for taking care of him.” You gave him a little hug after guiding him to the door. “I hope we can catch up another time without this type of thing going on.”

“Me too.” He smiled again, looking as sweet as ever, and then turned and left.

Now you were alone with...

“Darling?” Oh no, not the darling.

You turned, looking at Jude, who was struggling to keep himself sat upright. He was looking at you with the most drunken-hazed eyes ever, accompanied by the biggest of smiles.

“Yes, Jude?” It was better not to argue with a drunk person this late at night.

“Can I tell you something?”

“Yeah, sure.” You got closer, sitting on the carpet. Not too close, but not too far away from him. “What is it?”

“I'm an idiot. I'm so dumb, I got drunk tonight, and I miss you.” The smile left his face, but he was still looking at you with happy eyes. “Every time I see your face, I remember that I'm mad dumb for breaking up with you. Because I still love you. A lot.” He let himself fall back into the couch pillows, sighing. “I don't know why I panicked so much a month ago. It was a stupid chat.”

“Sorry?” Your heart was beating fast because of his past confessions, but this new phrase caught your attention way more. “What chat?”

He wasn't looking at you. He was just looking up at the ceiling, like he was trying to remember something.

“Just some stupid chat the coach gave us before you arrived at Dortmund that day... He was talking about how we, as professionals, had to settle in earlier so we didn't get carried away because of all the money and parties... And the drugs. He said that there was a reason for footballers to get married and have kids at such young ages.” He sighed again, looking tired. “And I knew he was talking to the younger part of the team, which included me... I just... I felt like I was being pressured to marry immediately... I got so carried away with my thoughts that I panicked when I saw you. You make me so happy, but I didn't feel ready for any of the coach's options.”

“So... You broke up with me instead of talking?” Woah. “That's fucked up, Jude.”

“I know... And I'm not asking you to forgive me or... Get back together with me... Even though that's what I have been wishing since I said the words, but... I wanted you to know.”

He didn't seem drunk at all now.

“Thank you for telling me.” That's all you could say for now. Too much information to take in.

“Would you have said yes?” He asked after a few minutes of silence, still looking at the ceiling.

“To what?”

“Marrying me.”

You felt like someone punched your heart and took the air out of your body. At the same time.

“I won't answer that.” Mostly because you didn't know the answer. “Get some sleep.” You got up, looking down at him.

“Why not?”

You took a long look at his face. You gave him a little smile, reaching for his cheek with one of your hands. You caressed it with the tip of your fingers before regretting touching him at all. He closed his eyes, but opened them when you retrieved your hand.

“Because there's no point in answering something that's not going to happen.”

He frowned, looking offended for a second before relaxing his face again.

“Well, I haven't asked you.”

“And you shouldn't, because that's something you do when you're sure about it... And not drunk.” You took one of the covers you kept close, tucking him on the sofa so he couldn't move. “And when you're in a relationship, of course. Now sleep or I'll kick you out of my house.”

“Okay...” He appeared so similar to a kid now, all flustered and with big eyes. “I'm sorry for all of this.”

“I forgive you.”

And that was true. You forgave him for all of it. You couldn't hold a grudge forever. It wasn't healthy.

“Really?” Hope sparkled in his eyes. It made your heart ache.

“I promise.”

Then you got closer and kissed his forehead to prove him right about your words. He gave you the biggest of smiles, again, before falling asleep right there. You gave him a last caress on the cheek before turning the lights off and walking towards your bedroom.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

You thought it was impossible to get any sleep after what happened, but the moment your head touched the pillow, you were out. The stress was draining your energy. You blacked out until the next morning, when a knock on the door woke you up.

You remembered everything that had happened just a couple of hours ago. There was Jude, knocking on your door like he was a stranger. Somehow, it felt like it.

“Come on in.” You said after a few seconds, rubbing your face.

The door slowly opened up. Jude was still covered in the blanket, holding it together with one hand below his chin while the other rubbed his eye. Pretty much the same as you. You couldn't help but smile a little at the sight.

“Good morning.” Even his voice had a little hint of shyness.

“Did you sleep well?” Was all you said while you got up and walked towards the bathroom.

“Yes...” He followed you, just two steps behind. “Thank you.”

“Stop saying 'thank you', just come here and brush your teeth.” You grabbed one of the brand new toothbrushes you kept in the drawer, offering it to him.

He seemed so scared yet happy about your behavior while taking the toothbrush. You weren't fooling anyone, it was fun to play with his mind a little bit. Payback.

He stood there watching you brush your teeth, wash your face, and brush your hair. It was very funny.

“I'm not going to suddenly take a knife out and follow you around the house with it, Jude. Get cleaned or you won't get breakfast.” You got out of the bathroom, smiling at him when he just blinked at you. “All yours.” And then you left him alone in there.

You entered the kitchen, ready for some breakfast. You heard the bathroom sink go on and off for a few minutes. Meanwhile, you decided to make some scrambled eggs with ham and toast some beagles. It was the best you could offer with so many thoughts taking most of your concentration.

When you were finishing the second plate, Jude appeared by the door and stayed there. He looked at the plates with surprise, like it was actually impossible for you to be making breakfast for him.

“It's getting cold.” You offered him one of the plates that was already sitting on the mini table you had available.

“Are you preparing me for my sudden death, darling?” He sat in front of you, waiting for you to take the first bite. He always did that.

“Not yet.” You took a bite off the beagle, smiling when he did the same. “Maybe after I eat.”

He smiled but didn't say anything. You ate in silence, looking at each other from time to time. You felt different around him now that you knew what caused him to break up with you. It wasn't that you suddenly forgot about everything else or how mad you felt, but it made things easier. You wanted to talk. Now there was a real reason for it.

“I'll wash the dishes.” Before you could say anything, he took both plates and stood up.

“Go ahead... And after you finish them, we'll talk.”

“Do I make some tea first?”

“Yeah, that'll be nice.”

He seemed to understand what was crossing your mind, so he made the tea quietly and walked to the living room. You followed him.

“Well...” You took a sip of the tea. “Do you remember what you said last night?”

“I do...” He squirmed on the seat. He was nervous. “I wanted to tell you all that sober but... I fuck up things quite regularly.”

You smiled, shaking your head.

“Okay, it's good for the sake of this conversation that you remember everything. Now, when I said that I forgive you, I meant it. But that doesn't mean I'm not angry or hurt by all of it.” He nodded. “I'm still disappointed about how poorly you managed the whole thing; you just needed to talk to me, and the breakup would never have happened.”

“I know.” He covered his face, sighing. “I'm an idiot.”

“Yeah! Look at me, I spent a month thinking you didn't love me anymore, and it turns out that you just were a bastard that didn't know how to talk to his girlfriend.” You slightly pushed his arm with your foot. “You said you didn't love me as you used to... Why?”

“I don't know.” He groaned, taking his hands off his face. “I guess I wanted you to hate me. I’ve never stopped loving you.” He grabbed your ankle, dragging your leg closer to his body. “I think I love more than before, actually.”

You didn't say anything for a while, you just looked at him for the longest time, trying to figure out what to do next.

“I'm very mad at you.” You took a deep breath. “That club thing you did after we broke up is still fresh in my mind. I can't pretend everything is the same just because we talked.”

“I know. I'm a jerk for doing that. I just wanted to see if... If I could act like I was okay. I wanted to feel okay. And couldn't accept that I regretted breaking up with you the second you left.”

“Always your big ego, huh?” You laughed. “Don't take this as if we just got back together. We're... We're friends from now on.”

“We are friends for now.” He said, smiling. “Because I'll do everything that's in my power to win you back.”

“Whatever you say, Bellingham.”

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚*ੈ✩‧₊˚⋆·˚ ༘ * TAGLIST

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fairysluna · 1 year

Text

NOT THE BEST IDEA — Modern!AU | Part 2

MASTERLIST | Part 1 ; Part 2 ; Part 3 ; Part 4

Pairing: Cregan Stark x Fem!Reader x Aemond Targaryen.

Summary: The secret is out, and now you have to learn how to heal your broken heart and how to move on, and soon a cute new guy would help you realize how much you were missing in life.

Tags/TW: angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, therapy sessions (bc she needs it so bad), helaena being the best friend we all deserve, brief smut(?, mentions of violence, murder and blood, aemond still is an ass but now he's also obsessed.

Author's Note: I got a little carried away with Cregan’s storyline at the beginning, but here it is!! Hopefully this will meet all of your expectations, your ideas were super helpful so thank you all of you, hope this is worthy of them!!

Word Count: 6.0k

Tag List: @immyowndefender @bellameshipper @mysticgothicgirl @aemondswifeisme @issshhh

Feedback, shares and comments are always welcome!!

You entered the room. You started to pace back and forth around it as the nerves were eating you alive. Your hands were shaky, and the tears soon came back to your eyes; the guilt, the rage and the pain in your chest was making this whole situation too overwhelming. You could feel the panic running through your veins as your beloved friend turned around to see you.

She looked serious, but not mad. Yet, the panic that you felt in the moment, along with the fear of losing her friendship over what had happened, had you seeing her serious semblance as something terrible.

"I'm so sorry, Helaena..." You cried, keeping the distance between you both, too scared of getting closer to her and being pushed away, "I ruined your cake, I ruined your birthday, I- I don't even know what to say, I'm a terrible friend, this is your special day and I ruined it..."

Your words were stumbling against each other, your mind going miles per hour as you could only sense the fear of losing Helaena forever.

“I’m sorry, I’m- I’m horrible, I’m sorry… I never meant to ruin everything.”

The girl walked towards you and hugged you tightly. This action had taken you aback and it took you a few seconds to react. You wrapped your arms around her waist and buried your face on the crock of her neck, leaving her skin soaking with your tears.

"Nonsense..." She spoke softly, as she held you close, "Y/n, you didn't ruin anything, we can get another cake, mum can go and pick one from the bakery, it’s okay…”

“I’m so sorry…” You repeated.

“Don’t apologize, it’s okay,” she reassured you, “But, y/n…” she pulled back, only to look at your face, “you need to tell me what is going on, this is so weird, I’ve never seen you like this before.”

Your eyes closed as you felt embarrassment. You looked like a psycho back there, and you cannot even think what Helaena was thinking about you right now.

“You promise you won’t be mad at me?” You asked, your voice shaky and unsteady. Helaena nodded and you took a deep breath.

You explained everything to her. How Aemond and you started to play around until eventually you were fool enough to fall in love with him, you told her how he gave you your first kiss and then offer you a relationship with the condition that should be secret, you told her that you were with him for almost a year before he decided to throw everything to the trash by a stupid letter.

And of course, you told her how he forbade you to speak about this with anyone.

“Oh, Gods…” Helaena said once you stopped explaining everything, “You had to go through all this by yourself? That’s why you were locked in your house most of the summer?”

“I couldn’t bear to see him,” you confessed, “I loved him so much… Perhaps I still do.”

“And he brought his girlfriend now… showing her around as if he is bragging about it. What an idiot!”

“I don’t want you to change the way you look at him, I know how close you both are.” you said softly, “my relationship with Aemond is now from the past.”

“How am I supposed to see him in the face now that I know how much he made you suffer? He’s the kind of guy we scream at while watching rom-coms, y/n. The type of guy we hate.”

“It’s okay, really.”

“No, it’s not,” she shook her head, grabbing your hands, “you said it yourself, you still love him, it’s not okay.”

“I must be okay, Helaena,” you quickly said, “he has a girlfriend, he moved on and I must do the same thing. I can’t keep crying for him when he doesn’t even care about me.”

Helaena pressed her lips and sighed, “if it makes you feel better, she is old and you're prettier. She is his Philosophy teacher.”

Your jaw almost fell to the floor, “Shut up, she’s not.”

“She is.” she nodded, “he was his assistant and then… they fucked.”

“Oh Gods…” you let out a breathy laugh and you covered your lips with your hand.

“I always thought Aegon would be the one doing this kind of stuff.” Helaena said between chuckles, “You should’ve seen mum’s reaction when she found out, it was hilarious.”

You laughed. The tears were already drying on your cheeks when Helaena pulled you in for another tight and comforting hug.

“You know I’m always going to be here for you, right?”

You nodded, “of course I do,” you said in a soft whisper. “I think it is best if I don’t come to your house while Aemond is here.”

“That’s fine…” she replied.

“I thought about killing him, actually,” you confessed.

Helaena pulled away from the hug and looked at you with a worried face, “Oh, babe…” she cleared her throat, “do you have plans this friday?”

“No, why?”

“You need a therapist.”

Two weeks later, you were seated in the waiting room of your therapist office, waiting for your second session. Helaena made you company the first time, but now she was out of the city with the rest of her family, so you were on your own now. You were sitting as you were looking at the Weather Report on the TV that was hanging on the wall. Your shoes were on top of the chair as you hugged your folded legs and placed your chin between your knees. You were completely bored without the company of your beloved friend.

That day, you arrived a little early. You had at least fifteen minutes to wait before it was your turn. You were trying to distract your mind, counting random things like the tiles on the floor, or the chairs in the room. You did not even notice the guy that walked towards you until he stood up in front of you.

"Is this seat taken?"

You looked up at this guy. Then you looked around the room. Literally every single chair was empty; it was seven o’ clock on a Friday, there was no one there but you, the guy in front of you and the old secretary behind the desk.

"Uhm... I think all the seats are empty actually.”

That made him chuckle, and he showed you his charming smile. He is cute, you thought.

“I saw you last week with a blonde girl, I thought she might have come with you today, too.” You frowned a little, has he seen you before? Was he watching you this whole time? Is he a creep? He soon widened his brown eyes, as if he had just realized how bad his words sounded, “Oh, Gods, don’t think I’m some kind of psychopath, I- I just saw you the other day and- I’ve never seen you before… I usually sit in that corner and the other day I saw you, and- Oh, fuck, did I just made a fool out of myself?”

You laughed. It was subtle but you did. He also chuckled, a bit nervous. You've seen him before, he would usually be with another brown haired boy that Helaena once thought was cute. Perhaps he wasn't a psycho, perhaps he just wanted to be your friend.

"It’s okay." You said, a breathy laugh left your lips, "you can sit." you tilted your head, and he soon sat on your side.

He cleared his throat and stayed silent for a couple minutes. You did not say anything either. You were both unsure of what to say or do now. You saw him from your peripheral view and realized he was glancing slightly at you, as if he was trying to say something but the words would not come out of his mouth. Something came over you and soon you were the one breaking the silence.

"I'm y/n." you stretched your hand for him to take.

He took it, slightly smiling and relieved, "I'm Cregan."

"Are you waiting for your session too?" You asked, trying to create a conversation.

"Umh, no,” he shook his head, “I've come to comfort my friend. He's going through some hard stuff.”

“How bad?”

He sighed, “he found out his father is not his actual father,” he explained, and your mouth opened with surprise.

“Oh, shit…” you muttered.

“Yeah,” he shrugged, “what about you?”

You pressed your lips in a thin line as you really considered lying to him, creating a super dramatic story seemed tempting, but you could not bring yourself to lie to him. Not when he was looking down at you with those sweet, kind eyes.

“My ex ruined my psyche,” you simply said.

“Oh.”

“But I'm doing therapy now so I guess I'm healing my trauma, right?” You tried to joke, not wanting to make him feel uncomfortable.

“Right.” He chuckled, “How long have you been single?”

“Eight months,” you then smirked. “Why? Are you going to ask me on a date?”

Cregan grinned after hearing your teasing, “do you want me to ask you for a date?”

“Do you want me to say yes?”

“Perhaps…”

You chuckled, "well, I'm going to answer you once I come out of my session."

"Then I guess I'll wait."

"Oh, you would wait for me?” You spoke with a dramatic tone that made him smile widely, “that's so romantic…”

"I would wait for you forever,” he replied, matching your tone almost immediately.

You felt something in your gut that you instantly recognized. Your smile flickered as you realized what was happening, and you immediately regret it. You were not in conditions to jump into another relationship right now, not after everything you have been through and you knew that very well.

But Gods, he was so damn charming.

You were not able to exchange more words as one of the doors was opened and a thin brown haired guy walked out it. He looked at Cregan with a raised eyebrow before looking at you and smirked playfully to his friend. However, he just moved his head in order to tell Cregan it was time to go.

He stood up and turned to see you one last time.

"I guess I'll have my answer next week," he inferred, "same hour?"

You thought about it. You really did. Perhaps this was your chance to finally be happy with a nice and decent guy, and you were pushing back out of fear. Your heart spoke first, and then your mind wanted to slap you.

"Same hour." you nodded.

He gave you one of those bewitching smiles as he left and you stood there. Feeling so stupid for making this rush decision that would probably bring you big consequences in your future. But you could not help yourself, and at least now you have a week to think about your answer.

You were debating yourself during the whole session, and your therapists immediately noticed that something odd was going on in your messy head. You told her, of course, thinking that she might give you the green light that you were waiting for. You were expecting a positive reaction from her, saying that dating other guys might help you move on… but you knew that was far from reality once you saw her face turning serious and stern.

"Listen to me carefully, y/n,” she spoke demandingly, as if she was giving you a command rather than an advice. “No. dating. until. you. have. healed,” she said slowly, carefully pronouncing each word so there will be no space for misunderstandings, “you are in a delicate place emotionally right now, which leaves you vulnerable and weak towards new feelings and experiences. You might be right; this guy might be your knight in shiny armor, your savior, your future husband… but we cannot risk it.” She leaned over her chair, getting closer to you, “you have to be patient and wait until you have healed from what you went through, understood?”

You silently nodded, thinking about Cregan and his goddamn smile. Now you had no other choice but to reject him, and the mere thought almost made you shake out of nervousness and anxiety. Your overthinking mind did not help at all.

As soon as you walked out of the office, while you were waiting for the bus, you called Helaena and told her everything. And of course, she said she was going to be there for you when the time to reject him would arrive. Perhaps dating this new guy is not the best idea.

A week later, you entered the waiting room with Helaena hanging from your arm. You looked around trying to find Cregan, but he was nowhere to be seen. You felt some kind of relief after you thought he probably left and now you will not go through the anxiety that this situation would bring to you. But you were never that lucky.

The bathroom door opened and Cregan walked out of it, looking as enchanting as the last time you saw him. He had a growing beard now, which made him look even more handsome than he already was.

"That's him." you said to Helaena, she immediately looked at him in a discreet way and she gasped,

"Oh, he's cute..." she whispered before looking your way, "you can do this okay? just explain all the things your therapist said and you will be fine, he doesn't seem like the kind of man who would get angry if he's rejected."

"Your brother didn't seem like a douche bag and look where I am now."

Helaena pressed her lips, "just relax, it'll be fine, you'll see."

Cregan noticed your presence almost immediately –again no one was there besides you three–, and he walked your way with a gentle grin on his face. Helaena saw him coming and she went to sit, pulling out a book from her tote bag. You felt your hands shake.

"I was waiting for you,” he confessed once he was close enough for you to hear.

"You were?" You asked, your voice coming out a bit lower than you expected.

"I’m afraid you owe me an answer.”

You smiled kindly at him, but your eyes showed him the struggle inside your mind. He knew it almost instantly, and you could see the disappointment on his face. You sighed deeply before starting to speak,

“Look, this will sound as a pathetic excuse, but trust me; it is not.” You put a rebel hair strand behind your ear before you keep going. Your hands shook as you were slightly scared of what his reaction might be. “My therapist kinda forbade me from being in a relationship, or even going out on dates, she says I must heal before jumping into a serious relationship with someone new.”

Your voice turned progressively lower with each word you pronounced, and once you finished you stood there, looking at the tall and handsome man in front of you, expectantly. Cregan nodded, softly. Then he clicked his tongue and smiled once again. You frowned after seeing his reaction, and before you could say anything at all, he spoke first.

“What if it’s not a date?”

You froze. Your eyes narrowed with confusion as he chuckled.

“There’s no need to be something else, we can be friends, right?” he proposed, “unless you don’t want to.”

“Uhm… I- I do, yeah,” you nodded.

“Then we can hang out as friends. That’s not a date, is it?”

You couldn’t help but smile, “No, it isn’t.”

“Can I have your phone number, then?”

You nodded, “Sure.”

And that is when your life turned a little better, and you finally were able to heal.

Helaena scolded you, obviously. Saying that it is obvious that neither of you wanted just a friendship, but you immediately said that you would obey the words of your therapist and not get romantically involved with Cregan, no matter how badly you both want it… you were just friends.

Two months have passed since you last saw Aemond, and now you barely thought about him. Cregan kept your mind busy, inviting you to go out and have some fun. To live a little. You were now inseparable. With Cregan you could publicly do all the things that you were not able to do with Aemond. Now you were not afraid of coming across someone you know, and you were not checking your surroundings every minute afraid of someone seeing you together. There was nothing to hide anymore.

Soon you realized that Cregan was the whole opposite of Aemond. Not only physically, but also mentally. While Aemond was more serious, mature and stern, Cregan was unhinged, funny and easygoing. You found yourself thinking many times what you saw on Aemond in the first place, why did you even fall in love with him?

You never told your therapist about your friendship with Cregan… she did not have to know.

Two more months passed, and you and Helaena finally managed to get the apartment of your dreams, right in the middle of town, in a good and safe area. The apartment was a complete mess when they gave you both the keys, and there was a lot of work to do, especially with carrying the furniture, fixing and painting the walls. You and Helaena knew you were not going to be able to do this alone, so you called for help. The next day, Aegon arrived first with a denim overall without a shirt underneath. Soon Cregan arrived too.

Four people decorating made it faster and easier. It only took a week and a half to have everything ready. That same day at night, Aegon had invited his friends, for he said you needed to inaugurate your new home with a big party.

You did not know when, or how, but soon you were drunk.

Cregan was visibly drunk too, Aegon was already dancing on top of the center table while Helaena was taking polaroid pictures of everything, the music was loud and the amount of people was growing each time. You were actually surprised that the police had not arrived yet.

An Abba song was playing in the background when everything happened. When Cregan was dancing with you as your smile was brighter than ever, as your entire body felt like floating whenever he would hold you by grabbing your waist every time your drunk state would make you trip on your own feet. You were singing loud, while Cregan would only look back at you with a tender smile.

Little did you know that his eyes were filled with devotion for you. He really tried to be just your friend. He really did. But you made it so hard, your mere existence was tempting him. Cregan only held back because he cared too much about you, and because he really wanted to do things right with you.

But while you were dancing, that smile on your face and the way your body moved; it just felt right. Cregan made you stop, holding you still in front of him as his hands cupped your face. Your eyes stared at him, and your smile flickered as you realized what was about to happen. The voice of your therapist appeared in the back of your mind, you felt your ears buzzing as you saw him sighing before he started to lean slowly towards you.

You panicked, but you did not dare to move away because you knew you wanted this too. You wanted it so, so bad.

He brushed his lips against yours, tempting you as you felt his heavy breathing against your lips. You softly whimpered, feeling desperate to kiss him, but he seemed to be taking his time to enjoy the moment. Your hands were holding his shirt, as if you did not want him to let go.

But he did.

Cregan felt guilty about his doings, knowing what you were going through, and knowing what your conditions were. He clenched his eyes pulling back, his hands covering his face as a grunt left his lips and then, he left. You felt the room spinning as you saw him leaving the apartment.

You spend the rest of the night drinking, trying not to think about it.

The next day, you woke up at noon. Helaena went to drop Aegon back to his house, and you were pacing around the apartment trying to clean some part of the mess everyone left behind. You just had a shower, which helped you remember what had happened between you and Cregan, and you wanted to punch yourself in the face.

You felt the urge to call your therapist and call in for an emergency session because you were feeling as if you were about to lose your mind once again. You were about to dial her until someone knocked on the door. You left your phone on the center table and you quickly went to attend the door thinking it was Helaena.

But you found Cregan on the other side.

“Cregan…” you said softly, “I-”

“I forgot my keys last night,” he said, shyly.

“Oh,” you said, a bit disappointed, but you let him in either way.

He walked past you, and you closed your eyes once you smelled his sweet cologne. You followed him towards the living room where he found his keys under the cushions of the sofa. You could only stare at him, the tension between you both was too obvious and you hated it. It felt so odd and uncomfortable, you felt guilty for it.

“Cregan, about last night-”

“I’m sorry,” he interrupted you, “I know I shouldn’t have done, but-” he stopped himself before looking at you with pledging eyes, “fuck, y/n, I couldn’t help it… you looked so beautiful and I just let myself go, I was drunk and I wasn’t thinking clearly-”

“You did it just because you were drunk?” you asked. Cregan tilted his head, his keys dangling between his fingers was a sign of his nervousness.

“I did it because… because I crave for you, y/n,” Cregan said, signs of despair tainting his low voice, “I can’t- I can’t help it, I can’t keep denying this. I fucking need you.”

Your breath hitched as you looked at him. His eyes were begging, and you were certain yours were too. Then you could not help it anymore, it was as if he was a big magnet that pulled you in. You quickly grabbed his cheeks, pulling him close to you as you stood on your tiptoes to finally reach his soft lips.

“W-wait,” he said between the kiss, “wait, no. Your therapist-”

“Fuck my therapist,” you interrupted him without thinking.

He pulled away, looked you in the eye as if he was trying to make sure he heard you clearly. He took a deep breath, still holding you close to his body, and he let out a breathy smile before saying,

“Fuck it.”

His lips soon reached for yours again, this time more hungry than before. It was passionate and deep, you both had been waiting too long for this moment to not seize it. His hands roaming up and down your body, desperate to touch you, to feel your soft skin under his big hands. You felt blissful, completely drunk by the taste of his lips.

Minutes later you were in your room, Cregan kissing your neck as he was now claiming you as his. Small moans left your lips while he was whispering nothing but sweet words and praises against your ear that had you drooling under his broad body. He managed to touch every inch of you, to kiss every part of your body, and you could feel your heart bursting with joy and excitement. Your mind would only focus on the man that was now yours, in how good he was making you feel… in how loved you felt between his arms.

Aemond did not even cross your mind, he had been out of it for a while now.

Few minutes later, after you both finished, Cregan looked at you with glossy eyes and a small, tender smile. He started giving you soft kisses around your flustered face while you were trying to control your breathing. This felt even better than sex, it felt more intimate and loving.

Cregan caressed your cheek, and you smiled.

“Does this mean we’re dating now?” He asked with a smirk.

You only chuckled and laughed, “I guess we are…”

He kissed you once again, and cuddled you between his arms. You wished this could last forever.

Once Helaena found out about your relationship with Cregan, she looked at you with a stern look, and, taking over her role as the mum friend between you both, she scolded you. Of course she was not mad, she was just worried about you and what might happen with your mental health if things do not go as well as you were expecting. You reassure her that you would be fine, and that Cregan was not like Aemond in any way.

The next months were blissful. Your little mental breakdown at Helaena’s birthday was now long forgotten. You were doing fine, you have moved on from Aemond completely. However, it would be unrealistic to say you don’t think about him sometimes, mostly because you're curious to know how he is doing. Sometimes you would eavesdrop when Helaena talks with him on the phone, but you would never dare to ask for him… that felt wrong.

Soon a year passed, and Helaena was organizing her birthday again. She wanted to do something small, not being such a fan of big parties. She asked you a thousand times if it would be okay to invite Aemond to the party, and you repeatedly said yes, Aemond was her brother and they have always been so close. It was her birthday, and you wanted to see her happy.

With Cregan practically living in the apartment now, the decoration took little time. He helped you both to hang stuff in the ceiling and reorganize the furniture so there will be more space.

Soon the guests, which consisted of four more friends and Helaena’s family, started to arrive. And you would not lie to yourself and say that you were not deadly nervous of seeing him again. You were scared that you might react the same way as last year. You knew you loved Cregan, but what if Aemond appears and makes you doubt everything? What if it makes you realize that you never moved on in the first place? What if you have a new mental breakdown in front of him and Cregan?

There were so many doubts in your mind that you had to sit for a while, drinking mint lemonade to remain calm. Luckily for you, Cregan did not seem to notice your nervousness, he was busy talking with some of the guests.

And when you were lost in your thoughts, Aemond walked in, but this time he was alone. He stepped into the apartment looking for his sister. You stared at him, expecting some reaction from you, but there was nothing. Nothing at all. Not even a slight tingle in your gut. You let out a heavy breath, relief and more calm.

You laughed at yourself for a moment, thinking how ridiculous you were for being so nervous about it.

“Hi, y/n.”

You froze, your body tensed as you looked up at Aemond. Your jaw clenched so hard your teeth hurt, and your smile faded slowly. You swallowed hard, and the anxiety in your body came back.

“Hi, Aemond.” you said, quickly. “Umh… Helaena might be in the kitchen.”

“I know, I saw her,” he softly nodded, curling his lips into a shy smile, “I came here because I wanted to know how you are? Helaena doesn’t give me many details.”

“You asked for me?” you spoke shocked.

“Helaena hasn’t given you my greetings?”

You shook your head, “no. She hasn’t.”

“Well, I’ve been asking for you a lot, lately… I’ve- I’ve missed you.” He says in a whisper, as if he was embarrassed to admit it. “I have also thought about you a lot.”

“Have you?” you questioned him, raising your eyebrow.

“Yes,” he nodded, “I realized how stupid I was with you and-”

“Aemond fucking Targaryen! What the hell are you doing here?”

You saw him tense as his relaxed face shifted into a rageful one. You frowned as you saw Cregan palming Aemond’s back so hard it made him tremble on his feet. You were about to open your mouth to ask what was going on, but Cregan spoke first.

“I haven’t seen you in years! Are you still jerking off with Ms. Harroway pictures?” Cregan teased him, and you widened your eyes.

“Stark.” Aemond said bitterly, his one eye looking at Cregan with an expression you have never seen before.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Cregan asked again.

“It’s my sister’s birthday.” He grunted, visibly pissed.

Cregan frowned, and you closed your eyes. You told him about Heleana’s brother in the first weeks of meeting him, but you never said his name. Perhaps you would realize that they met each other before. Now Cregan looked at you with concern, as if he was asking whether this is the brother who broke your heart.

“Wait, you’re Helaena’s brother?” He spoke in a growl.

“I am.” He nodded, unbothered, “I think the question here is why are you here?”

“It’s my girlfriend’s apartment.” Cregan said.

Aemond frowned, angry, “you’re dating Helaena?”

“No, I’m dating y/n.”

Aemond’s face fell with an indescribable rage. You didn’t notice it, for you were too busy trying to have an answer from Cregan about how they both met. Aemond was burning, his blood boiling as he heard you excusing yourself and saw you walking away with your new boyfriend.

He hated it. He hated seeing you with someone else being so happy and blissful. A year ago you were still waiting for him, you were still dreaming about getting back with him, but now you had moved one and fucked another man… and the fact that it was Cregan Stark made it even worse.

The same Cregan Stark that made Aemond be the second best in everything at school. No matter how hard he tried, how many nights he would spend studying for a test or training for the school Tourneys, Cregan would always beat him. He was Aemond’s biggest nightmare, and now, somehow, he managed to have you. Once again, Aemond lost to Cregan.

Perhaps it was the fact that it was him the one that was kissing you right in front of him, perhaps it was the fact that his ex left him for another man two months ago, or perhaps it was the pettines inside of him, but he was drunk in madness now. He wanted to pull you away from him and break his face.

He saw how he grabbed your waist in the same way he did once, he saw you looking at him with devotion and love as you spoke, making him smile. You were clearly in love with one another, and Aemond could not handle it. He hated it. You should be begging him to get back together, to be with him again. You should be watching him the same way you were watching Cregan.

You should be with him. Not with Cregan.

As the evening went by, things were getting worse for the silver haired man. He had not stopped staring at you during the whole party; each movement, each word and each breath you took were under a stare filled with hate and anger, filled with spite. Aemond would be unable to take his eyes off of you, and with each minute passing by, he would get more and more mad.

He remembered how soft your skin was, how gently you would kiss him and touch him, how beautiful your laugh was. He remembered your scent, your delicacy and playful stares. He would also remember the way you felt against his skin, the way you would squirm under his touch and how your soft moans would be silenced by his kisses.

At that point in the night, he knew he had to have you back. You were his once, and will be his again, he would make sure of it. He wanted you to be desperate for his touch once more, he wanted all your attention and love for him. Only for him.

He was the only one worthy of your love. How did you even dare trying to find another man when he is all that you need?

A hand on his shoulder made him wake up from his trance. He soon recognized the voice of Cregan buzzing in his ears; “I’ve seen you staring at her the whole night,” Cregan grunted, trying to sound calm, “leave her alone, you’ve caused her enough misery already.”

Aemond scoffed, and his daring voice came out, “and who are you to tell me what I have to do?”

“Don’t be a fucking asshole, man. You didn’t appreciate her when you had her, now she is happy. She’s with me, leave her alone.”

He clicked his tongue as a smug grin started to appear on his face, “I made her fall in love with me once, I know that as soon as I speak to her she will be eating from the palm of my hand once again.”

Cregan clenched his jaw after hearing him speaking about you that way. He breathed deep a few times trying to maintain his composure, not wanting to start an unnecessary fight on Helaena’s birthday. Instead, he just let out a breathy laugh and say,

“Look, she moved on… perhaps you should move on too and stop being so obsessed with her.”

Aemond tensed hearing those words. He remembered them too well. The fact that Cregan knew them too was proof enough to know that you had told him all of it, and that was the last straw; what he needed to explode.

In a blink Aemond punched Cregan and cut his cheekbone with his rings. You were coming out of the kitchen with a platter of cookies when you saw them pushing each other. Aemond was beating Cregan while the last one was trying to defend himself instead of punching back. Your heart sank as you heard the guests’ gasp. Alicent was the first one to react, trying to make the both men stop.

Aemond did not hear his mother screaming, he did not hear your pleas. He certainly did not feel Aegon pulling his shirt. His eyes were only seeing red as his hand was still beating Cregan. He thought about not stopping until killing him, to get him out of the way so he would get back to you. Cregan was an obstacle on his path back to you, and he wanted to get rid of it.

His mind was blind with the adrenaline of the moment, too filled with rage to even realize what was happening, and all his negative emotions became even worse when Cregan gave him a punch back. It was not until a group of three men pulled him back that he finally stopped.

He was breathing fast, looking bewildered by his own actions. He looked around, he saw you running towards Cregan as you worryingly held his bloody face. He frowned; you should be comforting him, not Cregan.

Soon Alicent stepped in, grasping Aemond’s arm strong enough to force him to look at her, “What the hell were you thinking?!” She scolded him.

He did not answer to his mother, instead, he looked at you. You were already staring at him with disbelief, and a bit of anger. You shook your head slightly as you were helping Cregan to go to your room in order to heal his wounds.

Aemond clenched his hands, and he breathed heavily. He will have to find another way to make you his again, because killing your new boyfriend was not the best idea.

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nicksnosering · 2 months

Text

I Hate Myself For Loving You Pt. 3

PT 1 PT 2

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The night air was cool and biting against the wetness trailing down my inner thighs, and I marveled in the freedom I felt from such an uncharacteristically bold move I’d made.

My phone buzzed in my purse, and I let it ring out three times before finally picking up on the fourth call.

I didn’t get the chance to say hello before I heard him yelling in my ear.

“What the fuck? You’re actually fucking kidding me. My brother? You’re disgusting. You’re actually the most despicable human being alive—“

He kept going for another few minutes until I heard the sound of him breathing angrily into the phone, signaling he was done.

“Alright, Chris. I’ll level with you. Yeah, maybe me hooking up with your brother wasn’t exactly the nicest thing I could’ve done, but you and I both know you’re not stupid enough to be confused about why I did it.”

My heels clicked against the sidewalk as I walked, punctuating my sentence for me. I’d never felt so liberated, so free, so—

“I hope it was worth it considering I’m never going to touch you again.”

My heart fell to my stomach.

Of course I’d wanted to make him mad. I’d wanted to see him seething, undeniably jealous and unable to hold back from admitting it any longer. He loved me the way I loved him, I know he did. Does.

With the alcohol still coursing through my system, my mouth opened before my brain could catch up, my words coming out far bolder than they’d usually be.

“I’d never want you to touch me again.”

He scoffed. “I’ll level with you,” he sneered, throwing my words back in my face. “Your slutty little ass can’t stay away for longer than a day, maybe two if you’re feeling especially bitchy right now. I need you to listen to me, because I’m only saying this once. I’m not coming back this time. When you call me crying because you realize how badly you fucked up, I can promise you I won’t pick up. So you better pray to God it was worth it, because I am not going to fuck you. Ever. Again.”

A laugh bubbled up out of my throat, my head swimming slightly as his words only really half sunk in. My eyes rolled and I shook my head as a grin crept its way onto my face.

“See you soon, Chris.”

——————

Once I was inside my front door, I kicked off my heels and headed straight for bed, not bothering to get out of my dress or take off my makeup. Tonight was exhausting, and I could already feel the headache starting to come on, signaling a raging hangover in the morning.

I’d almost been asleep when my phone started buzzing again. My heart lurched, shocked that he’d given up so quickly and was already reaching back out.

Except it wasn’t him.

“Hello?” I said, my eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

“Hey,” Matt breathed out. “I just wanted to make sure you got home okay. I couldn’t find you anywhere when I went back downstairs, so I assume you and your friends must’ve left.”

I smiled softly and warmth spread throughout my body. “Yeah, I’m home. Thank you for checking, that’s really sweet of you. Did you make it back okay?”

“Yeah, walking through my front door now. I’m sorry again about Chris, he’s not usually that…”

“Intense?” I supplied.

“We’ll go with that. Anyway, I just wanted to call and check in on you. I also wanted to say that I had a great time tonight, and I’d love to see you again if you’re up for it.”

The gears in my mind started turning, still feeling half-tipsy and fully spiteful. “Actually, I’m off work tomorrow, and I’ll probably be up for a few more hours anyway. You’re welcome to come over and continue the party here.”

“Oh,” he said, an air of surprise to his tone. “Um, yeah. That sounds good. Text me your address?”

“See you soon.”

I sent over the details and swiftly threw off the covers, climbing out of bed and heading straight for the bathroom. My reflection was rough. There was eyeliner smudged in rings around my eyes, and my hair looked like it hadn’t been brushed in days.

When I heard the first knock at the door, I’d managed to wash my face and get my hair under control, swapping my dress for some sweatpants and a tank top in an effort to look sexily indifferent.

I swing the door open to reveal Matt, still dressed in the same clothes he was in at the party. I suppress a grin at the thought of him rushing out of the door after our phone call and step aside to let him in.

“Hey,” he says, a soft smile on his face as he steps through the threshold into my apartment.

“Hey,” I respond.

He follows me into the kitchen, and I pull a bottle of cheap vodka out of the fridge, setting it on the counter as I look for two shot glasses. “Feel like keeping up the buzz?” I call over my shoulder.

“Oh, always.”

I pour us two shots and we both slam them quickly, shivering as the rubbing alcohol taste sets in. “Sorry, I only buy the cheap shit.”

“All good,” he smiles, stacking our empty shot glasses and leaning forward on the countertop. “This is a nice place.”

I glance around at my cheap one-bedroom apartment, taking in the chipping paint on the walls and the out of date shag carpet that’s peeling up at the corners of the living room. I turn back to him with a raised eyebrow. “No it’s not. This place is a shithole.”

He laughs loudly, raising his shoulders in apology. “Sorry, just trying to break the ice and make conversation. It was the first thing that came to mind.”

“Real smooth,” I tease, circling the countertop and coming to stand next to him. “Who says we need conversation?”

He takes my not-so-subtle hint, wrapping his arms around my waist and giving me a gentle smile before leaning in and softly capturing my lips with his own.

Matt could not be more different from his brother. Chris is all rough grabs and harsh teeth and aiming to get to his end goal, whereas Matt is more soft touches and gentle kisses and putting your needs before his own.

I can’t help but wonder if there’s a way to meet in the middle.

His tongue lightly traces over my neck, placing a soft kiss just below my ear before sucking gently, like he’s scared to leave a mark. My fingers come up to wind into his hair, pulling gently and reveling in the low moan he produces before sucking a little harder.

I inhale sharply when he leans back and blows, the cool air sending a rush of goosebumps down my spine. His hand starts slipping lower on my body, finding the waistband of my sweats and pushing inside. His fingers swirl over the crotch of my panties, and he pushes them aside to rub lightly over my clit, the sensation sparking all of my nerve ending and causing me to arch forward into his touch.

“Fuck, Matt,” I whisper as I dip my head and rest it against his shoulder, gripping his bicep to ensure his arm stays in place. He takes it a sign to speed up, fingers brushing exactly where they need to, and I let out a small whine, wrapping my arm around the back of his neck and entangling my hand in the soft hairs there.

“You sound so pretty, baby,” he whispers back, and he slips forward and sinks two fingers into me quickly, pumping them in and out at a slow pace, fingers crooking in the perfect spot with every thrust.

I can hear myself panting and moaning loudly as he works, and I look up and make eye contact, taken completely aback by his features.

There’s a soft smile on his face and a caring light in his eyes, and he just looks so… soft. Like he gives a fuck how I’m feeling. If this is good for me. It’s overwhelming and devastating all at once, and I can’t stop myself from thinking that this must be how Chris would look if he let down his guard and was fully open with me.

My heart twinges painfully in my chest, and I feel slightly guilty for still comparing the two when I should be solely focused on Matt, but these past five months of emotional torture that Chris has been putting me through are embedded in my brain. I can’t seem to separate the two of them no matter how hard I try.

Another precise curl of his fingers causing me to come soaring back to reality, and I lean in to kiss him again, needing to feel his emotions rather than seeing them. The kiss is sloppy, breaking apart each time I pant or moan again, and he moves to place small kisses on my cheek, on my eyelid, on my forehead.

Just as I feel like I’m about to burst into tears from the sheer kindness of his actions, he pulls out and grabs the back of my thighs, picking me up and placing another small kiss on my lips. “Bedroom?” he asks.

“Through the living room, to the right.”

He caries me through my apartment, pushing open the door with his knee and walking inside before laying me gently on the bed. His hands slide down to the waistband of my sweats again, and he hooks two fingers inside, glancing up at me for confirmation. I nod gently and he slides them off my body along with my underwear before climbing onto the bed with me. He hovers over me and reaches up to remove my shirt, leaving me bare and exposed in front of him.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispers, running his hands along my body in a way that’s far from sexual. It’s like he’s trying to take it all in, trying to memorize every curve and dip and the softness of my skin. Like he’s praising me. Worshipping me.

I can’t take it any longer, and I yank his shirt over his head and reach down to tear open the button on his jeans, but his hands come down to stop me. I look up in question, and he laughs a little. “Slow down, sweetheart. We don’t need to rush through this, I want to take my time.”

The air leaves my body at his words, watching in a daze as he slides his pants and boxers off in one fluid motion. He leans back over me, head ducking down and tongue flicking out lightly over my nipple. I shiver and moan slightly as he slides his way down to between my thighs, and immediately sets to work lapping at my clit. His fingers come back up to slide into me and my hand flies down to his hair, gripping it tightly as I arch my back off the bed.

“God, yes. That feels so good,” I whine, digging my heels into the bed and scooting forward, trying to push him further inside me. His fingers begin to scissor slightly, and I feel my legs start to shake, so close to the edge but refusing to let myself fall over it yet. “Matt, please. Please, I need you inside me.”

His head pops up and a grin overtakes his face at my begging, but his fingers continue to work inside of me, twisting and arching and making me fall apart beneath him. He pulls them out and rubs slow, lazy circles over my core, watching me intensely. “You sure?”

“Yes, fuck. Please, Matt,” I say, moving my hand to his shoulder and trying to pull him up. He stays rooted where he is and gives me a wink, maintaining eye contact as he leans down and licks a flat stripe over me again.

It’s almost too much, and I let out a mix of a whine and a whimper, trying to pull back. His hands hook under my thighs, pulling me closer and keeping me firmly where I am. He blows again, the rush of air breezing over my clit and I feel my stomach muscles tense. “Matt,” I whine again.

“Okay, okay.” He relents, pulling himself up to settle over me. I feel his tip pressing against my entrance and he leans down, placing another kiss on my forehead before pushing in slowly. I gasp at the feeling, wrapping my legs tightly around his waist and arching up to try to take him in more. “Slow, baby. I want you to feel it all.”

I can’t even form words at this point, utterly wrecked under him from the anticipation. I feel each slow, excruciating inch push in until he’s settled at the hilt, and he pulls back out just as slow before sliding back in. I’ve never been treated so tenderly, and I feel simultaneously too cold and too hot with the way his gaze trails over my face, searching for any sign of discomfort.

“That’s it,” he murmurs, continuing his gentle pace. “Just like that.”

I finally give in, relaxing my entire body and simply allowing myself to feel. His head drops down to nestle against my neck, switching between light sucking and simply pressing his lips there, and I hear my phone buzz on my nightstand. He doesn’t pay it any mind, and I reach over to find Chris’s contact name lighting it up.

I knew he’d give in.

I ignore the text and opt for calling him instead, discarding my phone back on my nightstand as it rings. I watch the screen go black, signaling he picked up, and wrap my arms around Matt’s neck.

“Fuck, Matt. You feel so good,” I moan.

“You sound so pretty, baby. Keep saying my name,” he responds, picking up speed with his thrusts.

My body arches up into his and I pull his hair slightly, making him groan and dig his fingers into my hips. “Harder, Matt, please,” I choke out, turning to suck a spot onto his neck. The thought of him going home and Chris seeing it fuels me along with his noises, and he starts to pound into me mercilessly.

I’m holding on by a thread, and I can feel his legs shaking, a clear signal that he is too. “Cum for me, Matt,” I moan, and we both unravel together, my high-pitched whining turning into a near scream as he mumbles sweet words into my ear.

“Fuck, yes. God, I could stay here forever,” he says, nipping at my earlobe as we both come down. “Your body is so perfect. You’re so beautiful.”

I lean up and press our lips together, sealing his words into my mouth. We lay intertwined, sweaty and panting, and he rubs light circles over my back as his other hand runs its fingers through my hair. I’ve never felt so content after sex, and it’s a feeling I could quickly get used to.

I lean over to check my phone screen and see the call has ended, as well as six new text messages having come in. I flip it over and cuddle back into Matt, placing light kisses on his torso as we start to drift into sleep together.

Chris can wait.

#chris sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo #sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo x reader #christopher sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo

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emilyssky · 9 months

Text

Chapter 13: Over Again

PAIRING: Lee Know! X fem!reader

GENRE(S): college au, smut, angst

WARNINGS: Mentions of violence and abuse, depression, self harm, eating disorders etc.. mentions of blood, swearing, smoking, smut [ dirty talk, oral; giving and receiving, choking, spanking, praising, degradation, pet names, sometimes Minho is a dick :)

SUMMARY: "Do you remember what you told me the first time we met?"

"What?"

"You said; Always leave people a little better than you found them" he looked at the floor with a small smile for a few seconds and then his eyes found mine. "You really annoyed me when we first met. I envied your optimism and excitement for life. But each time I saw you, I felt a certain thrill. You made me angry, you made me laugh., you made me feel everything. Something about you made me feel a little more alive each time. I know I fucked up and I know I'm an asshole but I'm also brutally in love with you."

Author’s note: I will for sure be editing this within the next few days so please excuse the mistakes, enjoy <333

My heart was drumming against my chest, the back of my neck and hands sweating as I held the bottom of my dress and ran. I ran like I'd never run in my entire life.

Hyunjin, out of breath as well, his face laced with panic and concern, extends a hand in front of me, blocking my way, just before we enter the living room, where the dance continues, like nothing has happened.

"What?" My head snaps to him.

"We can't draw any attention, we have to be discreet." He breathes out sharply.

I narrow my eyes at him, my mind way too consumed with panic to understand that he's right. "Hyunjin, I don't care about the stupid party. Where are they?"

I feel Minhos's fingers gently brush against my back, silently letting me know he's there. He stands behind me, his breathing hard as well but his panic is way more contained and controlled compared to mine and Hyunjin's.

"Did you tell Seungmin?" Minho leans closer to Hyunjin, his eyes searching the room and I do the same, finding Seungmin and Han talking in the corner of the room, their faces clouded as Seungmin presses his phone to his ear. Jeongin and Changbin are nowhere to be found.

"Yes, he has people looking into it." Hyunjin fixes his hair and adjusts his suit before walking calmly towards the door, Minho and I following.

The elevator ride felt like 2 hours instead of 15 seconds, and my legs wouldn't stop bouncing up and down. The minute the door opened, I was the first one out, running towards the exit of the building.

"Y/n, wait!" Minho yells my name, both of them running to catch up with me.

When I spot them, Chan leaning against his car and Felix seating in the back seat with the door open, my heart dropped.

"Oh, my god." I run to them, my choking words making their heads snap to us as we reach them.

"What the fuck happened?!" Minho says.

My hands instantly reach to touch Chan, while Hyunjin kneels in front of Felix taking in his injuries. Both of their faces are beaten up, with bruises and cuts everywhere, their hair tangled and their clothes messy like someone was trying to peel them off of them. I try to see how bad his beatings are, my fingers trying to lift his chin but he keeps his head down, blood coating his bottom lip.

"Chan.." I gasp, my eyes watering at the sight.

"I'm okay, I'm fine.." He mumbles the words that I've heard so many times before but know to never believe. I shake my head, wrapping my arms around his slumping shoulders, his forehead hitting my chest.

"That's not 'okay ' Chan..." Hyunjin spits, his eyes and hands all over Felix, who sits in silence, trying to control his breathing, his eyes blurry.

The sight of Chan hurt breaks my heart but the sight of Felix being hurt fills me with pure rage.

"Who did this?" Minho growls, his tone low, sending chills down my spine. He stands next to me, his arms glued to his side, his fingers curling into firsts. Chan lifts his head slowly, his eyes locking with Minho's and a silent conversation between them plays out for a few seconds, until Minho scoffs loudly, turning around. He buries his hands in his hair and starts pacing.

"I should have fucking killed him." He says under his breath.

I look between them confused. "What? What do you mean?"

I turn to Hyunjin, hoping for answers just as his face shifts from confused to pissed, his eyes narrowing and jaw locking. "Piece of shit."

It takes me a second, the wheels in my head turning, my mind catching up, realizing. And suddenly my heart drops even more. "It was Jackson, right?" The question leaves my trembling lips. I feel my body being showered with fear, fear like I've never felt before, and guilt. Jackson has put me in positions to be scared of him many times before but not like this, he's never gone that far. To hurt, physically hurt my friends in order to get to me is scary, the lengths that he's willing to go to and the things he will do.

"If it were only him, it wouldn't have been a problem." Felix's deep voice makes my head snaps his way.

"How many were they?"

"4." Chan answers Hyunjin, the back of his hand coming up to his bleeding nose.

"I-I don't understand.." I'm in shock. I don't know what to say or do besides hold my best friend between my arms.

"What don't you understand?" Minho's head snaps to me, his whole face burning with anger. "Like you didn't already know that your ex-boyfriend is a fucking piece of shit!" His eyes are cold yet his face is filled with rage.

"Minho." Chan says, warningly, probably feeling how his tone and words shook me a bit in his arms.

Minho stops pacing, now standing facing us with his hands on his hips. "He's a dead man. He's done."

"Okay, come down-" Chan starts but Minho cuts him off.

"Come down?" He says, with the straightest face ever. "Come down? You're asking me to calm down while your face and his," He points at Felix, still dangerously calm. "look light that." He states.

"Yes," Hyunjin's the one to answer. "You need to come down, 'cause it's your fault that they got in this mess in the first place." Hyunjin stands tall, his face hard staring at Minho.

"Hyunjin..." Felix reaches for his hand but Hyunjin pulls away sharply.

Minho's expression twitches a bit, clearly not expecting Hyunjin to say something like that. "I'm sorry that I stood up for her. " Minho takes a step towards him. "Someone had to."

I unwrap my hands from Chan, noticing the squint of Hyunjin's eyes and the tightness of his jaw.

"Stop talking like you're the only one that cares about her!" Hyunjin scoffs an angry laugh. "Cause you weren't there for her when shit went down." He takes a step as well, coming face to face with Minho's stone-cold expression. "I was." He points at his chest. "And Chan was, and Felix was!"

The frustration and anger in his voice is something that I haven't heard in a long, long time and it makes my legs move, now standing closer to them, my body alarmed by both of their radiating emotions. Chan's on his feet as well, looking carefully between his two friends.

"I never said that I'm the only one that cares." I can clearly tell that he's being careful with his words, holding himself back. "But he clearly deserved it."

Hyunjin clenches his jaw. "And what about them?" He motions towards Chan and Felix, his eyes not leaving Minho's. "Do you think that they deserved it too? Cause they paid the price for your reckless behavior. You care about her, don't you care about them?"

Minho's face flashes with emotion. "Of course I care, you know I do." His voice drops.

"Hyunjin, that's enough." Chan steps in, his protective instinct kicking in. Chan hates fighting and will do anything to avoid it, especially between friends.

Hyunjin however is not backing down, his emotions overtaking him. "Y/n told you to stay out of it, now she will have to clean your mess."

"Enough." Felix's voice booms, silencing all of us. His head hanging low, his expression unreadable. "Minho please just don't do anything."

Minhos's face visibly softens at Felix's pleading tone, hitting a nerve.

"There's no reason to fight." His focus turns to Hyunjin whose chest is still rising and falling. "We'll see how we're gonna deal with this later, we should just rest."

"Felix is right." I step in, touching Hyunjin's arm. Hyunjin tends to get really protective over his friends so his reaction is understandable. His eyes find mine, letting a heavy sigh. "Let's not fight, it's none's fault that Jackson's a dick. If anything it's mine, 'cause I was the one that dated him." I chuckle, trying to lift the heaviness of the atmosphere.

Hyunjin's head falls a little, nodding. "I know, I'm sorry." His hand rubs gently on my shoulder.

"Seungmin is looking into it. Let's just go home and talk about it tomorrow ." Chan sighs.

"You're coming with us." Felix states.

"What?" My brows come together.

"Why?" Minho steps forward, his head tilting with curiosity.

Felix's gaze moves between us before setting on Minho. "You never know. It's safer for her to stay with us, just for tonight."

Minho sighs, his shoulders visibly stiffening. "I hate this." He groans. "The fact that we have to act like this because of that motherfucker, like we're scared of him or something."

"I just don't understand why he would do something like this?" I whisper, questioning out loud. "It doesn't make sense, what's there to gain from beating you up? It would make sense to go after Minho, but why you two?"

My heart tightens the more I look at them, the heaviness in my consciousness growing. I hate this, this is my worst fear and the thing I was desperately trying to avoid; dragging people into my mess. I can't help but look at him, my eyes searching his for anything that they can offer me at this moment to make the pain in my chest a little less unbearable. He stares back, his eyes big and full with a handful of emotions, silently comforting me. And then he nods, a tiny move of his head. And that's all I need, weirdly enough.

"I spoke with Seungmin and the rest of the guys, letting them know that we're okay and I told Em to stay here tonight, so let's just go." Chan says, still looking at his phone, his fingers typing aggressively.

"Okay, fine." I move to get inside the car.

"No." Chan stops me. "Minho is driving you."

"Why?"

Minho rests his hands on his hips, his hair a perfect mess and his face expressionless still, staring between me and Chan. "I'm not gonna do anything stupid!" He lifts his hands in defense.

I shake my head with a small smile. "I'll babysit, don't worry. I'll see you at the frat."

"Excuse me?" He gives me a dirty look as I walk towards him.

"Let's go." I give him a small push on his shoulder, earning a series of laughs from behind me.

The air is suddenly cold against my skin, and everything slowly creeps in as we speed down the road. I try to somehow wrap my head around everything that's been happening but I can't. I can't really recall the last time everything was so messed up. I mean, I'm used to having a mess in my head but now that all this shit is actually happening I don't really know what to do or how to deal with all this. And even though fear is slowly taking over my head, even though I know that I have to find a way to fix everything all I can think about is him. Him, and how everything now is somehow about him. I hate to admit even to myself that he has concerned every piece of my mind and especially after tonight it will be impossible for me to stay away from him, no matter how he will treat me when the night is over. I just hope that somehow all this will be over when I close my eyes tonight, and when the daylight creeps into our lives things will be different. Simple.

"Y/n?" His voice snaps me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah?"

His eyes leave the road for a few seconds, scanning my face. "I said what are you thinking."

"Um," I mumble, my mind still lost in thought. "Just thinking."

"I hope you're thinking about me and not about that piece of shit."

I chuckle, turning to look at him.

"Do you want me to go and beat him up?... Again?" He adds.

"Do you have a death wish?" I shake my head.

"He does." His eyebrows go up, his eyes not leaving the road. He rests his back against the seat, one hand lazy holding the steering wheel while the other rests against his thigh and my fingers start toying with my dress, trying to keep themselves from touching it. His hand, his thigh...him.

His eyes catch me and a knowing smile grows on his lips. "I told you."

"What?"

"It's the 'Minho' effect."

I chuckle again, this time louder. "Shut up." I turn to look at him again and as tiny as his smile was I caught it. Not a smug or cocky smile, a true smile, soft and genuine.

He sighs, heavily, his teeth biting his bottom lip as he lets his head fall back against the seat. His free hand then moves from his thigh and gently takes mine, our fingers intertwining.

I stare down at our hands in my lap, fighting a grin that slowly fades into a heavy sigh of my own. "What are we gonna do?" I finally ask.

He doesn't answer, his jaw and grip on the wheel tightening.

"Minho, he's not okay." I look down at our hands again, feeling his thumb brushing against my skin, gently. "He's really spiteful and obsessive and he does things without caring about the consequences cause he never had to face them, thanks to his family. But he's mentally losing it, I can tell that he's not doing well. He's been struggling with these episodes and blackouts and anger issues his whole life. "

"Angel," He cuts me off, his face stone cold." I don't give a shit. He touched my friends. Hell, he touched you." He shakes his head. "He doesn't deserve pity. He had a shitty childhood, cool, tell him to join the fucking club along with the millions of other people that did as well." He spits. "And maybe see a therapist instead of beating up people.? Just saying." He lifts his shoulders.

"Well," I drag out. "You did beat him up too so... you're not handling your anger perfectly as well."

His eyes snap to mine, his face scarily expressionless. "Could you be just a little bit grateful for that, like damn?"

I tilt my head, wearing a soft smile at how this moment feels. "Thank you," I whisper, and mean it. " I appreciate what you did for me."

He looks at me, and I count the seconds his eyes study my face. Oh, how I love being looked at by him. He brings our intertwined hands to his lips, leaving a soft kiss on the back of mine. "There's not much that I wouldn't do for you angel."

Heat spreads across my face, my heart warm and beating faster at his words, and I can't say anything or do anything other than admire him as he continues to drive. I desperately wanna ask him about what this is, and what is it that he feels for me but the fear that I might ruin such a beautiful and rare moment for us stops me. So instead I seat back and let myself enjoy the car ride and the feeling of his hand in mine. It's then that I notice that the road we're taking is not the usual way to my apartment.

"Hold no, where are we going?" I look around curiously.

"I need to drop something off at a friend's house."

I narrow my eyes at him. "What friend?"

"Just a friend." He shrugs, not looking at me.

Here we go again. "Can we stop with the secrets?"

"Can't you just relax?" He snaps back. "There's no secret. I honestly just have to drop something off."

"Great, sure, just drag me along to your weed dropoffs, without telling me." I roll my eyes at him as he stops the car.

He takes his seat belt off and takes my chin between his fingers, forcing my eyes to his. "Cut the grumpy shit," He smirks and his eyes fall to my lips " It will take 10 seconds." And then he kisses me. It's short, only a few seconds, but enough to make my stomach fill with excitement. "Wait here."

He exits the car, his body moving so smoothly as he walks all the way to the front door of the house we parked in front of. I pull my phone out of my small purse, and send a quick text to Chan, letting him know that I'm gonna be a little late before deciding to scroll a little bit through Instagram, as I wait.

A light knock on my window makes me jump, almost causing me a heart attack. My eyes meet a young woman, with long dark hair and big brown eyes. She offers me an apologetic smile as I roll my window down.

"I'm so sorry," She immediately apologizes. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"No, it's okay" I brush her off. "do you need anything?"

"Oh, no, no. I just noticed Minho's car as I was coming home." She tugs a piece of her behind her ear.

The mention of his name shakes me but I try not to let my curiosity show, still I feel it eating me inside. "Um," I laugh awkwardly. "He's inside his friend's house but he'll be back any minute now. "

The girl looks behind her, at the house, and offers me a smile. "That's my house." She says.

"Oh," My stomach drops. "Um,excuse me but how do you know him?" I hesitantly ask, afraid of the answer.

Her smile grows. "Oh, I'm his sister."

I freeze, my eyes going wide."His sister?" Oh my god. "Mia right?"

"Yes." She giggles and I take her in once again, now noticing the little similarities. The big eyes, and bright smile.

"Oh, god." I open the car door, feeling the need to greet her properly. "Nice to meet you." I shake her hand. "I'm Y/n."

"I should have guessed that he got himself a girlfriend." She studies me. "That explains his sudden mood lift."

I blush. "Oh no, no, I'm not his-"

"Mia."

Both of our heads snap to the now open door, seeing Minho standing in the doorway. Our eyes meet and I can see his face hardening, his eyes moving between me and his sister. My blood runs cold at his expression, knowing what's coming.

"Min, hi." His sister warmly smiles at him.

But before he has a chance to say anything, a little kid appears, squeezing his way through Minho's legs slightly open legs. "Mommy!" He yells and runs towards us.

Mia drops to the floor. "Hi baby, come here." She takes the giggling, little boy in her arms, lifting him off the ground as I stand completely frozen next to them but not as frozen as Minho.

He's a statue. As still as I've ever seen him before and for once his face doesn't hold an inch of confidence. It holds something I've never seen from him; fear. Uncertainty and hesitance.

My eyes move from the woman and the child to him many times, my brain catching up. The scene that plays in front of me is the first hit, the first punch in the stomach.

"I met your girlfriend." Mia nods my way with the biggest smile, a smile that Minho doesn't return, instead, he flashes her a look.

"She's not my girlfriend." He says, and that was the second hit and most brutal one like it always is with him. His words cut like knives, and this time is no different. Actually this time, it hurts more.

My shoulders drop, my whole face unable to maintain a somewhat happily natural expression, as I stand without having anything to say.

"Oh." I feel his sister's eyes on me, and I don't have to look to know the sympathy that they hold.

"She's just a friend." He goes on, adding as if his previous words weren't enough, and the thought that he might be doing it on purpose crosses my mind. There's no way that he doesn't realize how much he's hurting me right now, but then again I feel like that's how we always end up.

"I dropped your things, " He points towards the door. "So we're just gonna go."

He walks up to his sister, planting a lazy kiss on the side of her head before ruffling the small boy's hair.

"Bye Uncle Minho." The boy says with the sweetest little smile.

Minho smiles back softly. "Bye, kiddo." And when he looks away from them, the softness is gone.

"Drive safely," Mia says back as she makes her way towards the door. "And Y/n, it was lovely meeting you."

I force myself to find my voice. "You too."

When the door closes, and we are alone, Minho makes a move my way, a step with his hand lifted, yet his eyes are looking anywhere but mine. I take a step back, my chest heavier by the second, the look on his face and his words awakening anger and pain inside me.

"Just get in the car." His gaze meets mine, and I see nothing. His eyes, blank and hard.

I shake my head, arms crossed. "Fuck you." I scoff.

I walk past him, my feet moving fast wanting nothing but to get as far away from his as possible.

"Y/n!" He yells my name but not in a way that will make me stop, not in the way I want him to. I feel his grip on my elbow before he spins me around to face him.

I push at his chest with all the force I can master. "Don't fucking touch me."

"Just get in the car, I'll explain-"

"No," I cut him off. "There's nothing to explain. I'm tired." I let my arms drop and slam against the side of my thighs. "I'm tired of your games, I'm tired of going back and forth and I'm tired of your lies."

"I've never lied to you." His face and voice drop. "I've always been real with you. I just-"

"Just what?" I say drowning in frustration. "Just wanna use me when you can and when we're around others to treat me like shit?" My fear of looking pathetic doesn't stop me cause right now I don't care if he realizes just how much I want him, all I care about is the fact that he doesn't want me in the same way.

"A friend?" I get into his face but he doesn't move he simply clenches his jaw, his eyes hardening. "My breath was yours the minute I laid eyes on you?" I quote his words from earlier that made my heart melt, in the most mocking way I can. "Yeah, I'm guessing we're really good friends huh?" I push at his chest again. Right now I'm seeing red, feeling pure rage at how hurt I allowed myself to get by him once again.

His face turns to the right, the back of his index finger brushing the tip of his nose as his tongue pokes the inside of his mouth repeatably. He bounces back, nevertheless, coming back in my face.

"If you could just let me explain for a second and stop being so fucking aggressive-"

"I don't wanna hear anything from you." I laugh.

"I don't give a fuck what you want." He spits back.

"Clearly! And that's the problem."

His head falls back. "You're overreacting."

My eyes narrow, hands curling into fists in front of my face. "Dude, are you being serious right now?!" My hands bury themselves in my hair as a frustrated laugh escapes me. "I can't do this, I really can't."

His palms come together, touching his mouth and nose, and closes his eyes, a visible effort to contain his anger. "Y/n, please listen to me."

"I don't want to. " I shake my head. "I wanna go home, I don't wanna be around you anymore, I can't even look at you right now. Actually, I don't feel like being around ever again. " I say, knowing it's a lie, yet the words leave my mouth, my anger leading them.

His shoulders drop. "You don't mean that."

"I do." I spit, my eyes watering. "You hurt me! It's all you ever do! You give me a moment of happiness, a few beautiful words and then you rip me apart."

I do gain a small amount of satisfaction from the way his face shifts, how his eyes are getting glossy and moving everywhere around my face, desperately.

"Baby-" He reaches for me but I hold my hands up, stopping him. The nickname hurts.

I'm unable to stop the tears now, my throat tight. "I'm leaving. I'm walking home and don't you dare follow me. For once, respect me and listen."

I don't look at him before I turn around to grab my stuff from his car, cause I know that the sight will be painful enough to make me stay, to let him explain and sweet-talk his way through me but I'm done getting hurt. I walk away from him and he does nothing to stop me.

I walk and I walk, letting the tears fall in silence, coating my face and neck. I welcome the pain and the feeling of losing him again as if he was ever mine to begin with and allow myself to cry for him just for a little while. The thing that hurts the most is that; I knew. I know Minho, I know how complicated he is, and how he goes back and forth with his emotions yet I still let myself fall. I like him. God, I want him so much it hurts but how long will I allow myself to be there for someone who hasn't figured out what they want?

A car slowly stops next to me as I keep walking.

Hyunjin's eyes meet mine, and he reaches over to the passenger's seat to open the door. "Get in."

I do without thinking about it.

"How did you find me?" I cross my arms, aware that my face is still wet from the tears so I keep my head low.

He glances at me swiftly as he drives, his face more clouded than ever before. "He called me and told me that you left and that you're walking back home. So I checked your location and came."

We stop at a red light, and his heavy sight fills the air.

"Did you tell Chan?" I mumble.

"No." He turns to me, but I don't lift my eyes, I keep them glued to my knees, tears still escaping the corners of them, silently. "You know that he would kill him, especially if he found out how hard you're crying over him right now." He brushes the side of my hair away from my face, tugging them behind my ear. I must look like a fucking panda right now, and a new wave of tears almost reaches me over the hours I spend doing my makeup just for him to ruin it within a few minutes.

I rub my cheeks with my palms, brushing the tears off, and take a breath. "I'm sorry."

"I hate seeing you cry." He says under his breath. "And maybe I should tell Chan, just to see Minho get a good beating."

"Hyunjin!"

"What?" He lifts his shoulders, hands still on the wheel. "He deserves it. Look, Minho is my friend and I obviously love the guy but I'm done watching you get heartbroken over dudes that don't deserve you."

"Maybe I'm the problem." I whisper but he catches it.

"Don't say that." He answers sharply. "Please don't say that. I can't stand the fact that he's making you think this way about yourself."

I wish I could see myself the way my friends see me, but I can't. Cause in my eyes, I'm always the problem. In my eyes, I'm never enough and I'm always at fault. And deep down I know that the only reason why everyone sees me as someone that deserves their love and protection is because they don't know everything about me. And I made sure of that. I never wanted anyone to know what I've done in the past or anything about my childhood cause then everyone would see me, exactly how I see myself.

"I like him." I sob.

"I know babe." His hand gently touches my knee.

"I feel like he's the only one that sees me, the only person that can truly understand me."

His expression twitches. "Okay, ouch! That's bullshit. I see you." His tone is playfully offended. "And I understand you."

It's true, he does. All of them do. But not like him.

"I know you do." I touch his hand. "But with him, it felt, different. I've never felt a connection like that before." I lay my emotions open for him.

He sighs again, the type of sigh that makes me want to break down again.

"Look Minho is," He's searching for the right words. "He's a lot to deal with, he's complicated. And even though he's an amazing person and a really giving and loyal friend, being in a relationship is completely different."

"What do you mean?" I look at him confused.

"I mean that he cares about you Y/n." His fingers drum on the wheel. "A lot, like a lot lot." He chuckles. "But he has his own issues to deal with, and the fact that he can't be with you exactly how you want him to or need him to doesn't mean he doesn't want to."

I give him a sideways glance, his words surprising me. "How do you know all this? I thought that you and Minho weren't that close."

"Well, first of all, it's common sense and I'm a pretty intellectual human being." He smirks, earning a light push on his shoulder by me. "Second, Minho loves me. He likes to act like I annoy the shit out of him around others but I know that I'm secretly his favorite. We've gotten pretty close despite the fact that we bicker about every little thing." He shrugs.

"Ugh!" I groan. "Why can't he act like a normal human being? I'm tired of chasing him!"

"Then don't! Let him chase you this time."

"He won't." I shake my head. Chasing me would mean that he cares enough and it's like he has this fear of showing any type of emotion. He never shows me anything unless I push him, bring him to his limits.

"Oh, trust me," Hyunjin's lips turn into a small knowing smile. "He will. Now forget about him and focus on the severely beaten baby Felix that's waiting for you in his room to cuddle."

My eyes go wide, realizing I have completely forgotten about them. "Oh my god! Drive faster!"

I've missed this. Being squeezed between Hyunjin and Felix, cuddling under the warm sheets as the daylight creeps into the room through the half-closed curtains. I don't wanna move an inch, I don't wanna face reality or talk about everything that happened last night. I just wanna stay here, my head resting on Hyunjin's chest while Felix is curled behind me, his limps launching on me like a koala bear, both of them lightly snoring.

Hyunjin agreed to not tell Chan anything but it wasn't hard for him to realize that something happened when he saw my face the minute we walked through the door, he still said nothing though. We didn't talk much about what happened, we hang out a bit and then we went straight to bed, the events of the night too heavy so all of us.

"Rise and shine kids!" Chan's voice pulls me out of my slumber, and I slowly open my eyes. He pulls the curtains fully open earning a series of groans from both Hyunjin and Felix. Felix buries himself deeper into the covers, his body still glued to mine while Hyunjin unwraps one arm from around me and places his forearm over his eyes.

"It's time to get up." Chan walks closer to the bed, a lazy smile plastered on his face.

I stretch my arms, gently pulling myself out of their grips in order to lift myself into a seating position.

"I missed this sight." Chan admires us with his arms crossed. "You kids sleeping together."

"Stop talking like a father." I rub my eyes, trying to wake up a bit. "I babysit you more than you do."

"That's not true," His smile grows. "I'm the dad and Emma is the mom, everyone knows that." He shrugs. "Ah, it's hard being a dad, especially now that I have 5 more kids."

"So should we call you daddy from now on?" Hyunjin's raspy morning voice comes from between the pillows, his eyes still closed.

"I mean, if the shoe fits..." Chan trails off, with a smirk.

I reach for the nearest pillow and throw it at him.

He easily avoids it, chucking. "Get up and come down for breakfast. It's Christmas." He says already out of the door.

Holy shit, he's right. With everything that's been happening, the fact that today is Christmas Day totally slipped my mind. A wave of excitement and joy runs through me, and it brings a small smile to my lips. It's Christmas. I make a move to lift my body, but Felix's hand, flat against my stomach stops me.

"5 more minutes." He mumbles, still half asleep. His morning voice is something I'll probably never get used to no matter how many times we sleep together.

"Noooo!" I groan, laughing. "Come on, it's Christmas!"

I have to fight my way out of the bed, but the minute I'm on my feet I ran to the bathroom, to quickly wash my face and brush my teeth. I look at myself in the mirror a bit longer, notching the small red marks across my neck. His marks. And the feeling of his lips on my neck, his hands on me, his words, everything came rushing back. I shake my head, in attempt to shake him off, but it's impossible. He's all I think about, I feel like he's everywhere, and honestly, I don't know when it got to this point. I don't know if I wanna talk to him after last night, the look on his face and his words are still fresh, open wounds. A part of me believes that if I don't make the move to talk he will simply ignore me like he always does, but after last night and especially after my talk with Hyunjin, I will not let myself make the first move. Even though I want to, despite how his words and actions last night hurt me. I wanna see him try, for once. Maybe he will, maybe not. Still, I'm done running after him, hoping.

I make my way down the stairs, excitement filling my veins but my feet slow down when I hear voices coming from the living room. I turn slowly to the right, careful not to be head.

Chan stands at the half-open door, only his back visible to me. "I told you she's sleeping."

"Look, I just really need to talk to her."

Minho.

His voice makes my breath hitch, my heart suddenly heavy in my chest. I try to move closer, in order to sneak a peek at him.

"Minho, please just go. I don't know what happened but I know that she needs space." Chan insists.

"No," Minho takes a step forward. "She needs to listen to me."

The muscles on Chan's back tighten. "I told you to be careful." His voice is steady and low. "She's my best friend and you have no idea how protective I am over her."

Minho stares at him just as hard, both of their bodies still as a statue. "Chan.."

"Don't make me step in between you two, 'cause for her I will," Chan warns him, his tone, unlike anything I've heard before from him. "You can be around her, you can like her, you can even love her if you want, but you don't get to break her heart. Cause then things will get complicated. You guys are the most important thing in my life, but she's family to me."

Chan's words make me warm. Even though we both know what we mean to each other, it's not often that I hear him express it in such words. Since my brother died, there's been this hole inside me, a void that nothing could fill. Or so I thought. When Chan came into my life everything changed. We became so close, so fast that I didn't even realize that he had silently filled that hole inside me. We always say that I saved him because my family took him in in a way, but I think it's the other way around. Chan's the reason that I'm where I am today.

"Please don't cross the line." He adds.

Minho's head stands low, his hair messy, falling into his eyes. "I don't wanna hurt her." His tone is gentle, sad. And I can't help but feel the same, his words tugging my heart. I wanna run to the door and wrap myself around him but I stay rooted, not letting myself go down that road again.

"Just.." Chan trails off. "Give her space, yeah? Just go home, rest, and come back for the Christmas dinner."

Minho looks tired, his eyes drained from the usual hint of life they hold with bags underneath them. Chan pats his shoulder, but it takes one look from Minho to pull him into a hug.

"Just please sleep and eat, don't make me worry about you too." Chan whispers against him.

The scene in front of me looks so vulnerable and personal that I begin to feel like I shouldn't be here, watching them. I force myself to step back, soundlessly jogging up the stairs until I hear the front door close. I wait for a moment, watching as Chan walks towards the kitchen before I do the same.

His head snaps to me as I enter. "Good morning princess."

"Good morning." I smile at him lazily. I lean into the counter, observing how he flips the last of the massive golden pancakes and stacks them on top of the rest. It's my first time spending Christmas with them, usually, I chose to spend the holidays with my mum but I'm glad I'm here.

"What?" He chuckles, noticing my staring. He places the pancakes in the middle of the counter, next to a variety of toppings, like Nutella, maple syrup, and many fruits. There's also fresh coffee, juice, and 2 different cereal placed on the counter along with 4 plates and glasses.

"Nothing," I shake my head. "I'm just happy to be spending Christmas with you guys."

His smile is soft as he reaches me. "I'm happy too."

I let my eyes study him, his injuries darker in the light of day. It feels like a punch in the stomach.

He notices the way I look at him. "It's okay." He says gently.

"It's not Chan," I bite my lip. "It's really not."

He tilts his head, his eyes soft and big staring at me and when my own eyes start to fill with tears he pulls me to his chest. "Come here."

His arms are one of the few places I feel truly safe. Everything about him brings me comfort and calms me down.

"It's gonna be okay, yeah? I promise." His hands brush my hair. "I'll take care of everything."

Oh, how I wish I could believe him.

#lee know x reader #lee know smut #stray kids x reader #kpop fanfic #kpop smut #kpop #skz smut #lee know fanfic #lee know series #lee minho #leeknowfanfic #lee know #lee know skz #lee minho skz #lee minho x reader #skz imagines #skz fanfic #lee minho fanfic #kpopsmut

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pukner · 1 year

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I just had a thought sorry for spilling it here but platonic stobin s5 steve death with orpheus & eurydice-style plotline of robin pulling some improbable scientific and supernatural strings to get steve back and hahahahah um surprise eddie is there too & he’s been helping steve survive in whatever underlayer of life/death they’ve found themselves in because he’s been navigating it for a bit now

hey anon. Anon don't apologize can u please elaborate I'm losing it????

god, robin loving Steve so much she rends apart the veil between life and death. Maybe Steve dies in the Upside-Down. Maybe she feels like some part of her died with him. Maybe she was screaming as the gate closed, reaching out desperately for the other half of her heart, maybe she had to be held back, had to be told, robin, you can't bring him back. Robin, please, he's dead already, please.

Maybe it's like Robin died. Maybe she's the one doing the haunting. Maybe she's being haunted. She hears him laugh in her ear as she fumbles a conversation. Hears him hum his favorite song when it comes on the radio. She smells his shampoo in the breeze. She can't sleep, because sometimes she feels the weight of him against her back, like they're lying back-to-back again, like they did in Starcourt. Back when they were giggling children waiting to die.

Maybe she looks drawn and pale and won't talk to anyone. No one sounds right. No one gets it. She has a Walkman, plays his favorite song on a loop, like she's been cursed.

She hears his voice on the radio instead of Dancing in the Dark. She follows his laughter in the wind, bad dad jokes and terrible puns, down to the scar where the gate was.

She doesn't know how she gets through. All she has is Springsteen and his bat. She can't sleep without either. She doesn't sleep much anyway.

She wanders this corpse of a world, empty without Henry to fuel it, and waits. Sings Total Eclipse of the Heart in a stupid muppet voice. Sings Springsteen. Narrates all the things that have happened since the gate closed, but only the funny bits. The happy bits. Not that she's been there for them, but.

She hears him sing back, croaky and amused. She doesn't dare look. She hears him laugh when she fumbles the words. She can't hear to turn her head to where the voice is coming from. Can't bear to see nothing at all.

Slowly, she gets up and walks to the gate. She hears footsteps, someone singing with her, and she can't bear to look, and she's shaking and she thinks she might've lost her mind.

You sit around getting older, she whispers, voice hoarse. It's been hours, she thinks. Days, maybe.

There's a joke here somewhere and it's on me, Steve sings back, and he sounds real. And then--

I'll shake this world off my shoulders, someone else joins in, and Robin shakes.

Come on, baby, the laugh's on me, they all sing, and they sound like home.

She makes it through the gate on unsteady legs. She stumbles forward, into the burning sunlight, into a world alive. Nearly plants on her face, but then strong, real arms catch her. Someone laughs in her ear, warm breath on her face.

"Oh, Rob," says Steve, and she can feels his tears on her shoulder, "Oh, bud. I gotcha. I got--"

She spins around and hugs him, a sob ripping out of her throat. Another pair of arms encircle them, and she looks up. Eddie Munson, haggard and worse for wear, grins down at her.

"Heya, Buckley," he says, "Hope you didn't mind me crashing your cute little lovers' reunion."

"Gross," she says, instead of bursting into further tears, "We're not like that."

"Yeah," says Steve, tucking her face into his neck, where she can smell salt and iron and dirt, "She's, like. The other half of my heart or whatever, doesn't mean we're dating."

"Oh, good," says Eddie, brightly, from where he's plastered to the pair of them like a gangly limpet, "Because I've spent all of our shared undeath sucking face with the other half of your heart, Buckley, and that might make things awkward."

Robin snorts out a laugh, and alright, now she's crying again. She tightens her grip on Steve, listens to his heartbeat, feels the pulse in the hollow of his throat, the rumble of his chest as he tells Eddie Munson to shut the fuck up.

Her Walkman's still playing. She's holding her heart, and his annoying boyfriend. She's no longer haunted, no longer haunting.

#stobin #steve harrington #robin buckley #steve dies #but not really?#ambiguous anyway #eddie lives #eddie lives au #robin and steve would defy logic yo be together again #steddie #ficlet #my writing #looth yells #asks #st ficlet

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sukioyakio · 6 months

Text

All it takes is an bit of practice

This is a of Miguel if he didn’t switch spot for the other Miguel and the other Miguel lived with his daughter( and wanted to be more polite and I wanted to be more like ‘happy Miguel’)

I feel llike Miguel,the one we know,who is the leader of the spider society,would still stalk the other Miguel the one that die and the one miguel switch with and his life but wouldn’t go all out to switch spot for him since he still alive. But like let imagine Miguel is asking Layla if he come out homely or look sweet and give kind vibes? Since he doesn’t know if he come out like that,since he always inside he’s man cave.In which I feel like Layla would just have this face

“🤨🙂” Layla-“Uum Miguel. . .what. .are you evening doing?”she says with an questioning look,as she pop up next to miguel,with her eyebrows raised.

Which Miguel grunt and mutter as he look at the other Miguel smiling sweetly in an picture and let out an annoyed sigh.

Miguel-“I. . I’m. .trying to smile” he says,as he pinched his nose and looked more annoyed at how stupid he sounded.”oh joder esta mierda” he muttered,as layla pause then realized.

Layla-“OHHHhh!Bossman! I didn’t what you’re doing with your face,but now I know!!miguel”she says with an awkward smile,as she look at him and then away.

Miguel-“Is my smile that bad. . . .”he say with a grunt as he look at the picture again,and sighs,as he hears nothing from layla for a good 5 seconds,

Layla-“ it is Miguel *she sighs as Layla pat his back well try too*… look I know I’m not program to lie But if I being serious it a bad smile. . . . . but I can help with that!”she say with an award chuckle but to be soon an playful smile,as she give him an thumbs up.

Miguel-“Gracias layla"he says genuinely as he look at the picture with the other him with his daughter, and take an deep breath and look at layla with an determined look.

Layla-“no problem!! I just look up ten different articles on HOW TO smile Better” she says with an cheeky smile and her sassy voice perk in,as she pull up her mini holograms.

Miguel-“ ten? why not one article?”

Layla-“because I know it going to take longer than one article”she says in an “well duh 🙄” voice to Miguel,as she has an smug smile.

Which Miguel grunted at and sigh as he turned to point at the picture with the other Miguel with Gabriella smiling and then layla teleported well zap into view of the hologram and then after a few minutes of layla staring back at Miguel and the other Miguel she smiled at him

Layla-“OK soooo after examining the smiling face of the other you I think we can start!”

Miguel-“finally Iayla”

Layla-“ ok big man I want you to try smile again but better then last time ok 👍”

Miguel-“ok..? miguel smile but the smile look like he was one of the like an insane mother fucker and Miguel started to get worried at Layla reaction”w-what wrong!?”

Layla-“… boss man I think this is going to take us all day honestly☠️…”

grunted and sighed harder trying to be more polite but failed obviously and pinch his nose Miguel-WHY!??!!! … was my Smile that bad what did it look like”

she sigh and she look the other way,as she tried to not to laugh at the picture of Miguel trying to smile Layla-”Oh lord Miguel pff-fft~ I’m so sorry”

Miguel-“I hate you…” Layla-“I know you meant ‘I love you,anyway LET US BEGIN the session”

after a lot of fails attempts and a lot of awkward smile and some angry faces and smile and some ugly faces

Miguel-“ a la mierda esta MIREDA! I can’t do this is shit NO MORE LAYLA! We been doing this FOR 12 HOURS NOW!!… god I just wanted to smile like the other me ….” Miguel just makes an loud disappointed sigh.

Layla-“ Miguel I’m sorry but I’m all the articles, videos,and pictures, said to be happy and be a kind or funny person.. are you happy? Miguel”she says in an question tone of voice and her face looks an bit concerned for him but still having her sassy eyes.

Miguel-“I AM HAPPY LAYLA! DO I LOOK HAPPY!” He says very sarcastically and loudly.

Miguel look at Layla with the forced smile ever his eyes are pull all the way out it look like it about to fall out and his smile is just a huge awkward smile

Layla-“ EHHH-…. Nope you don’t look or sound like it”

Miguel-“FUCK! I’m done”

after a few minutes of sighing at himself for thinking about this would be a good idea to be more polite or to be like his more like his other version of himself … ‘being happy with his daughter’ keyword ‘with his daughter’

Layla-“fine but Miguel don’t you want to see the pictures that we took from tour trying smile session?”

Miguel-“fine” he says with an scoff and sigh.

Layla showing all the pictures of the smiling session the awkward ones,the angers,the wtf smile face,the huh smile.

And then Miguel smile that All those stupid pictures of him trying to smile and Layla laughing and smile in some of he picture,as layla looked at him and saw him smiling like actually smiling.

Layla-“OMG YOU SMILE MIGUEL WE FINALLY DID IT!”

Miguel-“shut up ok” … as he chuckles at his stupid face,-“I can’t believe that how I look like”as he rolls his eyes still with an slight grin on his face.

Layla-“yea I know right”she says with an sassy tone of voice,and chuckles.

Miguel-“ shut up…Layla … thank you”

Layla-“NO problem! Miguel!” She says as she file her ai nails,with an playful smile on her face.

layla-“it only take an bit of practice”

Sorry if there any mistakes for the Spanish part,I use google translate,so if there anything tell me,also I hope you enjoy this,I just wanted to make something with Miguel and layla,BUT I hope you guys have an great day.

quote of the day :

“I.. always . . Come..BACK!!”

@tarjapearce @honey-on-your-tongue @cherryredstars @miguelsslvt

#miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o'hara fluff #miguel ohara fanfiction #miguel o'hara #across the spiderverse #writers on tumblr #writerscommunity #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel x reader #miguel o'hara fic #miguel o'hara smut #miguel o'hara x y/n

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whumpshaped · 7 months

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For Beck, what was it like for him when he first started noticing that he was... enjoying the entire vampire bite thing? When did Helle first enthrall him, since he didn't on purpose the first time?

:) thank u anon ur first question hit a point i was eager to write abt. the second is very exciting too, but it came juuuust a bit later at a different time... i will write it though !

masterlist

tw vampire whumper, possessive whumper, gaslighting, mind control, basically noncon drugging, manhandling, noncon biting, and EXTREMELY suggestive stuff, i would go as far as to say it's noncon vampire kinky stuff

"No, wait, wait!" Beck hit the soft bed with a yelp, and he immediately tried to get up to scurry away. Helle was on him in an instant, straddling his waist and pinning his wrists above his head.

"Oh, I waited once. I am not in the mood today." They didn't sound angry, not yet anyway. They just sounded... less playful, which began to become the new angry in Beck's mind. He knew there would be hell to pay if he actually made them angry, but their fleeting moods of practicality were scary enough for now.

"No, Helle, please, not today, please not today! Any day but today, please!"

That seemed to pique their interest. He was still weakly trying to get out from under them, tears stinging his eyes and quickly trickling down the sides of his face as he moved around. "Why?" was all they asked, and Beck slowly stopped struggling.

Why?

Why, of course they wanted to know why, and now he had to explain or get bitten.

"I– can I explain tomorrow?" he sniffled, not even trying to sound as pathetic as he ended up being. "Please, just, just give me 24 hours, I will be ready by the door and you can tear my neck open and whatever else you want! Not today, please–"

"No, I need an explanation today," they cut in. Beck swallowed when they leaned down, gently dragging their fingers along his throat. "If I am to miss out on such fine blood for a whole night, I absolutely must know why. Only a fool would give it up without good reason."

"It's o-only a good reason to– to me... b-but it's so important to me, I– please, I will tell you everything later, tomorrow! Anything!"

"You are not on top of your bargaining game today, human, and I am losing interest very quickly."

Beck knew they were being genuine, he could see it in their eyes. So he bit the bullet and just said it, a blush creeping onto his face and probably making him all the more enticing as he did so. "I have a date."

Helle's hand stilled on his neck. The entire vampire stilled, in that unnatural way only someone undead could, and for a moment Beck thought they were about to laugh. He might've preferred it to the cold 'oh' he eventually received in response.

"I just– I don't want to be dizzy and bleeding, and, and I don't want her to think I'm– I'm..."

"What? A thrall? A bloodbag? The unluckiest man alive for having wandered into that alley? Do you actually think I care for your little mortal love affairs?"

Oh, they were angry now, and Beck backtracked as fast as he could, openly crying now. God, he was so terrified of them. "No, n-no, I'm sorry, it was stupid– please, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to waste your time..." He could just cancel. He could cancel and reschedule.

To when, if they're feeding every single night? an insistent voice whispered, and he brushed it off as quickly as it came.

"Please don't be angry," he whimpered, tilting his head to expose a row of healed and half-healed bite marks. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Please don't hurt me."

"The living are so tiresome," they sighed, grabbing him by the jaw and forcing his head further to the left to the point it hurt. He didn't complain. "But, lucky you, I am forgiving."

It did not feel like that as they bit down, and he whined again, glad to have the sound muffled by his blanket. Maybe it was never going to get less terrifying to be fed on in his own home. To see his own bed, feel it under his back, and have the vampire on top of him. These were two things that never should've collided.

But here he was, trying to tune it out as Helle clearly made it hurt more than necessary. He knew enough by now that he could tell when they did that, and today was definitely–

"A-ah," he gasped, the half-whimper half-moan escaping him involuntarily.

They weren't jealous, they told themself as they accidentally pushed some venom into their human's neck. It wasn't enough to be noticeable, but it was enough to have an effect; Beck would simply have to discern whether his body betrayed him on his own or with a bit of help.

They pulled away, pretending to be annoyed. "Oh, in the dating mindset already?" they hissed, way more vicious than they intended. "You will end up making me feel bad after all, for stealing such precious sounds from your girlfriend."

"I– I don't– she's not– I don't know what–"

"Keep quiet. I will have my meal in peace." They bit down again, purposely sucking a prominent hickey onto his neck. None of his cute little shirts were going to cover this one, they made sure of that.

They weren't jealous. They were... territorial, as all vampires. They told themself that over and over as they slowly released more and more venom and heard the human moan again before choking out a helpless little sob, clearly very afraid of the consequences.

"You– you're using–" they moved their hand to cover his mouth, deciding to finish feeding first and lie later.

It had to be. It had to be the venom. He couldn't feel it being injected into his neck, but he felt good, and it had to be the venom, because he never felt good when being bitten, it hurt, and he didn't like pain, he didn't. And Helle was especially rough tonight– so why else would his mind be so hazy? Why else would it be so hard to stifle moans even under the threat of more pain?

He was just caught off guard by venom, that was it. Helle had never used it before. Why now? They weren't jealous, were they? No, he trashed that thought before it could take root in his mind, focusing instead on keeping his composure.

He was burning up by the time the vampire finished, and he couldn't bear to meet their eyes even after they pulled back and let go of his jaw. "I'm sorry," he said immediately, voice thick with something he didn't want to think about. "I'm sorry, you shouldn't have had to cover my mouth, I was just– I didn't expect it, I'm sorry–"

"You know I am not using any venom this time around," they said simply, and Beck's heart sank. No, that couldn't be right. "But I will be mindful of just how painful I make it on your next date night, now that I know it makes you act out."

"N-no, that's not– I don't like the bites, I'm not into–"

"Sorting that out isn't any of my concern, you can do that alone in your free time. Or with her. But I have a particular distaste for people throwing around accusations like that, so do not try to tell me what I did or didn't do again." They waited a moment, and Beck tried to process everything he'd just heard. It wasn't venom. What was it, then? Was it really just... him? Helle grabbed his face again and forced him to look up at them, all but growling, "Do you understand me, human?"

"Yes! Y-yes, I'm sorry, it won't happen again," he said hastily, more than relieved when Helle let go of him and got off the bed.

"Good," they said lightly before they turned to leave the bedroom and hopefully his apartment. "My warmest regards to the missus."

Beck stayed lying on the bed as the footsteps slowly got quieter, going towards the front door. Then there was a click, a creak, and a soft thud as he was left alone.

He stared at the ceiling and tried to will it to stop spinning. He wasn't entirely sure it was the blood loss that made it so finicky — it was likely just the emotions. Maybe this was some sort of trauma response. Maybe– maybe this was common among vampire victims. He would have to look that up later.

He didn't know how much time had passed until he finally calmed down enough to get up and grab his phone, and he realised with a wince that it was ten minutes past the agreed upon time. He had two messages from her, one being a simple 'excited to meet up tonight :)' and the second a more careful 'does tonight still stand?'

He called her, ready to talk about a strange vampire in an alley, to say he was attacked and he just wanted to be at home. It would've been halfway to the truth, really.

"Beck? Is everything okay?"

"Y-yeah... yeah, I'm so sorry, I'm running late. I'll be right there, my phone was just– it's an old one, a bit glitchy, I couldn't call in advance–"

But he needed to get out and socialise. He needed to feel what it was actually like to be naturally pulled to someone, a human, instead of a rigid fucking corpse.

"Oh, don't worry about it! God, I was thinking up the worst scenarios in my head," she said with a nervous chuckle. "I'll be waiting, then!"

So he got ready. He cleaned his neck and put on a turtleneck that would be way too warm for an inside date, got in his car despite feeling lightheaded, and drove right to the selected restaurant. He walked in and tried to act like he always did, complimented her dress like he had any capacity to care for it, and sat across from her for three hours, chatting away like the two of them always had at work.

And he didn't think about how the two felt nothing-alike. He didn't concern himself with the memories that took all his focus, didn't stress over wanting Helle to sit across from him instead, and definitely ignored the growing pit in his stomach as he thought over and over again about their threat, reminding himself that it wasn't a promise.

'I will be mindful of just how painful I make it on your next date night.'

general drabbles taglist: @ashh-ed @whumpsday @whump-queen @the-scrapegoat @hidden-dreamland @rosewriteswhump @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night @whumpkinpie @delicateprincepaper @whumppmuhw @whump-em @cyborg0109 @morning-star-whump @justanotherlokifan @2in1whump @lthrboy @justletmereadmywhump @florissimps

#whump #whump writing #at my beck and call #beckett #helle #vampire whumper #possessive whumper #gaslighting #mind control #noncon drugging #manhandling #noncon biting #citrus scale #suggestive #asks

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