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#not to mention they are also dummy thicc
spark-my-nature · 11 months
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It Takes Three to Tango (5) - DRW & SFK
This one's overdue, but it's also dummy thicc, so I hope that makes up for it. I love you all so bad, thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the love you've shown this silly little fic, I can't tell you how much it means to me. As long as y'all keep enjoying it, I'll keep writing, I'm so grateful!
Also, a big thank you to @jake-kiszkas-smirk for the brilliant ideas and the never ending encouragement <3 Do yourself a favor and go check out their incredible writing if you haven't already!
Chapter summary: It's been a couple of days, and you come home early to find something very interesting playing out on your couch. Very smutty, very fluffy (yknow, me and my usual bullshit)
Chapter WC: 12.7K | Pairings: Danny x Reader x Sam (MFM threesome with slash pairings)
Chapter warnings: 18+! Smut (handjobs, unprotected penetrative sex, unprotected anal sex), slash pairings (silly bisexual boys), language (swearing, use of derogatory terms but its all loving and in good nature), spanking if you squint, power play, mentions of infidelity, the briefest, tiniest blink of angst but it's immediately taken care of because I'm incapable of writing anybody suffering
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Previous chapter | First chapter
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The sunny beautiful weather kept up into the next several days, and the gentle swishing of the warm breeze through the trees bordering your lawn was already serving to help you decompress as you juggled a few grocery bags around. Digging in your purse for the house keys, you felt the sun beating down on your neck and briefly toyed with the idea of a beach day with your boyfriend, something you were especially hopeful for once you’d seen his car in the driveway. Getting to ogle your gorgeous boyfriend in his short little yellow shorts? Yes please.
The days had been long for the boys, their stubbornness and passion keeping them going at full throttle as of late, and this was the first time in a while that Danny had been home before dusk.
It was now mid week, and after Sam had gone home Saturday afternoon, you’d hadn’t even had a chance to talk to Danny yet about… anything. You’d been working, he’d been recording, and the only time you’d see each other was in the evenings when both of you were too tired for words beyond your usual goodnights and I love yous. 
You wouldn’t say it was awkward between you, not by a stretch. But you could sense mild waves of an unidentified tension coming off of Danny when he’d walk through the door each evening, and with both of you too exhausted to have a real discussion about the recent happenings, that unfamiliar restless energy simply simmered on the back burner with a wordless promise to unravel it soon. 
Finally jutting the keys in the lock, you pushed inside, humming softly to yourself. You set down the bags and dropped your purse, kicking off your shoes with a pleased sigh. Home at last... no sign of Danny yet, though. He generally met you at the door, welcoming you home with a forehead kiss and a hug, but you supposed you weren’t usually finished work this early. He wouldn’t be expecting you yet, and you felt a prickle of mischievous excitement, hopeful to surprise him. 
That excitement was rapidly snuffed out and replaced with a worried confusion, though. From the direction of the living room, you heard it. 
A moan. 
Not Danny’s moan, no, that was a sound you knew well. You froze, listening closely as your heart drummed uncomfortably, racking your brain for any reasonable explanation or cause for the sound.
Then, again, a soft groan sounded, and this time it was immediately followed by a much more familiar grunt, one from your boyfriend’s chest. 
Your heart clenched for a second, seizing with a streak of fear and pain.
No, calm down, you told yourself, Danny wouldn’t cheat, and you knew this (at least you thought), but you couldn’t help the immediate twist of anxious pain that twisted your chest as you kept listening, silent and still in the entryway. 
Muffled and drawn out, another moan sounded from within the house, and it clicked into place for you. The most welcome, albeit unexpected cold bucket of relief washed over you as you recognized the source of the next noise. 
“F-fucking- mmm, Danny…”
Sam.
...Sam?
In all honesty, you didn’t see that coming, mostly because neither of you had really talked about Friday night’s rendezvous with the bassist aside from a few jokes and reassurances spattered throughout the rest of the weekend. And while you held a tiny shard of confusion, frustration, even a little anger at the lack of communication, the emotion that reigned over them all was this sort of voyeuristic intrigue.
Chasing after those feelings pushed you further into the house, as silently as you could manage, the thrill of catching them off guard confusingly mingling with the remaining embers of anxiety and hurt. For a flash, you felt guilty for sneaking around on them, before you indignantly shook the feeling off when you realized the hypocrisy. If they were gonna sneak around on you, then you were most definitely entitled to do the same, right? And so down the short corridor you went, toward the living room quiet as a mouse. You barely peaked your head around the corner and peered into the living room, and you were instantly knocked on your ass, on the verge of collapsing at the sight. 
Shirtless and disheveled, both men lay semi-upright, tangled across the length of the couch. Sam sprawled half on top of Danny, the latter with his hands tangled in the former’s hair and around his shoulders, holding on to him desperately as their lips muffled each other’s moans. 
Your eyes traveled hungrily to the movement of their grinding, bucking hips, and you realized each boy’s pants were undone and lazily shoved down beneath their groins.
“God, you’re so fucking hard,” Sam whined under his breath, interrupting nearly every word with a sloppy kiss to Danny’s mouth, unwilling to break apart for longer. 
Danny’s forehead pressed to Sam’s as he slipped his hands around to hold both sides of Sam’s face, his jaw slack as he attempted to catch his breath, inhibited by the relentless grinding of Sam’s cock against his own. 
“Mmhmm,” he nodded, arching his hips impossibly tighter against Sam’s. “You drive me insane, you know that?”
Sam grunted, his eyelids fluttering heavily as his back muscles flexed and rippled, his shoulders supporting his body as he kept his lithe hips rolling. He sucked in a sharp breath, pushing himself up straighter to watch his cock slide up and down alongside Danny’s. 
“Fucking shit,” he groaned, tossing his head back.
Danny’s hands smoothed down his neck, slowly palming down his chest, stopping to tweak his nipples and earning a stuttery gasp in reward. He descended further, finally landing both hands on Sam’s hips, gripping the flesh that was exposed with his jeans hanging around the swell of his ass. 
Sam paused his hips and shifted until he was balancing his bodyweight over Danny with one arm. Then with a submissive glance at the drummer’s face through his lashes, he brought the other broad, veiny hand between them and wrapped it around both their cocks together, slowly beginning to stroke them both in tandem. 
Danny hissed, eyes locking with Sammy’s as the pleasure rushed through him, the exhilaration apparent on his blissed-out face. 
Sam’s jaw hung open, drinking in his best friend’s pleasure-wracked expression. “You are so gorgeous, Daniel,” he whimpered.
Danny cracked a weak smile up at him, too distracted by the friction between his legs for much more. “So’re you, pretty boy.”
As Sam’s hips bucked involuntarily at the pet name, a spasm born of pleasure, he ground deeper into Danny’s purplish, rock-hard length and his fist jerked them both suddenly, sharp and tight. Danny’s head fell back with an almost pained-sounding moan, breaking off from the heated kiss and sending his cry of Sam’s name echoing off the walls. 
It was a gorgeous sight, the two of them absolutely lost in each other. No wonder they hadn’t heard you come home. The longer you watched, though, the harder it was becoming to stay still, hidden.
Sam let go of the two of them for a second, sighing needily at the frustrated whine Danny let out, and brought his hand to his mouth. He looked Danny in the eye as he slowly licked the flat of his tongue up his palm, coating it in spit before taking both their twitching cocks in his fist again. He huffed a whiny sound through his nose as he picked up the pace, Danny’s jaw dropping with a long, soft, moan that quivered out of him from the way Sam’s movements trembled his body. 
“Shit, Sammy,” he grunted, bucking his hips up, adding his contribution by fucking into Sam’s tight grip. 
Sam rolled his hips deeper. With the most submissive doe eyes you’d ever seen, he mumbled, his cheeks pink and breathless with the exertion, “That feel good, Daddy?” 
Oh, fuck. Well that’s all you’ll be thinking about for the rest of your life, you thought. 
Danny’s tightly furrowed brows tipped up in the middle at his words, a sharp gasp quickly followed with a loud groan. “Jesus christ,” he growled, nodding quickly as his hand behind Sam’s neck brought their foreheads together. As they panted into each other’s mouths, Danny’s low voice rumbled between the soft grunts punched out of him, “So good, uhh- so fucking good for me… such a sweet, pretty boy for Daddy, aren't you?”
 Sam whimpered loudly with a particularly delicious pump of their erections, his jaw clenching, flexing his gorgeous jawline. "Yeah," he whined desperately.
You swallowed hard, bracing yourself and stepping out into the open doorway. You leaned against the frame, crossing your arms, and when they still remained oblivious, you cleared your throat softly. 
Sam didn’t seem to notice, but Danny’s head jerked towards the sound, his eyes widening comically once they locked on you. He quickly shoved at Sam’s shoulder, hissing in his panic, “Sam, stop- stop,” to which Sam blinked up at him, confused and frustrated as he reluctantly stilled his hips. “What?” he breathed, brows knitting. 
“Babe!” Danny croaked, already hurriedly trying to tuck himself back into his pants. Sam’s head whipped to the door, his panicked expression matching Danny’s in an instant. 
“Oh fuck-“ he uttered under his breath, then rasped breathlessly, “H-Hey, doll.”
You stepped into the room, eyeing the two of them, holding up a hand to Danny, who reluctantly gave up on his futile attempt at modesty with Sam’s lithe body pinning his jeans in place. Sam, bit by bit realizing the situation at hand, went to climb off your boyfriend, but you shook your head. 
“No, no, you two stay put,” you ordered softly. 
Danny swallowed hard, his expression guilt ridden and panicked. “Honey, I- we didn’t mean to, I’m so sorry, it just kind of…” 
Sam nodded, finishing his sentence, “Just kinda happened, we didn’t- we should’ve told you, I’m sorry, it wasn’t, planned- fuck, I’m sorry, I’ll- I’m gonna go, I’m sorry.” 
Danny, for all his panic, seemed just as remorseful to see Sam leave as he was to have been caught with the boy on top of him. “Sam, wait-“
“Stop,” you interrupted, commanding but gentle. “Relax, alright? Both of you. Sam, stay, please?”
He took a breath and relaxed, only slightly, and nodded, shuffling his pants up over his hips as he adjusted to sit beside Danny as he too redressed his lower half. 
You shuffled your foot, glancing around the room. “I’m… I’m not mad. I mean, not really,” you told them, licking your lips. 
Danny let out a slow breath, and Sam nodded as he studied the rug beneath his feet. 
You shifted your weight as you rubbed your arm shyly. “Like, obviously, you guys seriously suck at communication…”
“I know, and I’m so fucking sorry baby, you’re so right, I-“
You cut off your boyfriend’s grovelling with a shake of your head and the hint of a grin. “Shh, let me talk.” He nodded apologetically and sat back into the couch cushion, looking small despite his broad frame. 
To your surprise, Sam extended a comforting arm, resting his hand over Danny’s leg and thumbing at the denim. 
Your eyes traced the movement, and you took a second to center yourself. "I know we never really set any kind of groundrules? Which is nobody’s fault in particular,” you conceded. 
Both boys peered up at you, slowly unfreezing by the minute when you continued to not flip out at them as they’d clearly expected. It was endearing in a strange way, especially with the way Sam still held his hand protectively over Danny’s thigh. 
You chewed on your lip and moved towards them, pulling the cushioned footstool that matched your lazyboy over to sit in front of them. Shyly keeping your eyes below their faces, you nodded once as you said, “I think we should… talk.”
Danny quietly agreed, “Yeah, absolutely,” joined by Sam’s tentative, “Okay.”
You swallowed, trying to land on a good place to start. Part of you selfishly wished Sam wasn’t here for this, with so much left unsaid between you and your boyfriend. You felt like you’d been caught unprepared, knowing there were things you would’ve liked to have gotten out in the open with your boyfriend alone first. Now, with Sam thrown in the mix, patiently but expectantly sitting before you, you struggled on the right words. 
With your eyes still casted down, you licked your lips again, then Danny’s hand came into view, gently holding his palm open for you. You suspected he was offering his comforting touch as an option for you, rather than just taking your hand as he usually would have done, perhaps out of fear that you were secretly, actually upset with him. You quickly took him up on it, squeezing his hand in comfort to both you and him. 
His reassuring touch put an end to the invisible stopper holding you back, and the words poured out of you.
“First of all, um... Sammy, I want you to be aware that Danny and I haven’t really, uh, talked about… you know.” 
He nodded, biting his thumbnail as he fixed you with those sweet brown eyes, and you continued. 
“So, Danny,” you looked up at him, meeting his gentle gaze, “I’m not… well, I’m not mad that you guys are…” you cracked a little smile, gesturing between them, “You know. Cause if I’m honest, I was hoping it would happen again, what happened Friday, and I think you were too. I mean, clearly,” you giggled quietly. 
Danny blushed, resting his cheek bashfully in his hand, his elbow propped on his knee. “I think that’s safe to say...” 
Sam smirked to himself, glancing at Danny from the corner of his eye before dropping his gaze to his twiddling thumbs. 
You smiled, lifting his knuckles to your lips. You then looked over at Sammy, catching his eyes. He ran his tongue between his lips. 
Addressing mostly Sam, but opening the discussion to both of them, you looked down nervously as you quietly started, “I think the only part that’s like, bothering me, is like, y’know, you guys did this without me, and like… maybe I should be, but I’m not really mad about the fact that you didn’t tell me, I’m more just… second guessing where I fit into this. I’m wondering, you know, is this… is this an us thing, or just a Sam and Danny thing…?”
Your question trailed off, and you cursed the pathetic way you asked. Danny was yours, you knew that, and it was stupid to feel like an intruder, but when you really thought about it, that’s how you felt. And the hurt and insecurity that you felt stemmed both from the fact that you loved Danny (and could be very territorial over him when you wanted to be), so the disregard for your feelings stung, especially from him. But it also stemmed from the fact that you wanted to be a part of what they did, to be included. 
You didn’t know exactly how you felt about Sam, but there was something there. You liked him, more than you'd realised for sure, and you were certain Danny felt the same. It happened so fast, so fast that you hadn’t had a chance to process it, let alone broach it with your boyfriend, and those feelings scared you enough without the whole, walking in on your boyfriend and mutual best friend on top of each other without telling you, thing.
Sam sat up straighter, more serious than you’d ever seen him, and shook his head quickly.
“No, nonono, it’s… if it’s anything, it’s an all of us thing. You really gotta believe us, dollface, we did not plan for this.” 
You blushed and nodded, satisfied with that for now. “So, will you tell me? What- what did happen, then?”
Danny glanced at Sam shyly, and Sam, meeting his eyes, smirked boyishly and fluttered those long eyelashes at him. “You’re a better storyteller than me,” he murmured, nudging Danny with his knee. 
You raised an eyebrow at your boy, cracking an expectant smirk as you leaned forward on your hands. 
Danny’s lips parted shyly, glancing between the two of you and chuckling softly after a second, “Okay, uh… we were recording, and I guess Jake had to leave, some interview thing? I dunno, but we all just packed up for the day, but somebody’s Tesla hadn’t been charging, so I said I’d drive him home.”
Sam rolled his eyes, loosely pushing air through his lips petulantly, “Yeah, yeah, anyway, we were gonna go do something-“
“-go to the beach,” Danny filled in.
“-Yeah, so we came here first, and…” Sam looked down and giggled, shrugging one shoulder as his cheeks pinked endearingly. “He asked if I wanted a drink. Such a great host, you know,” he glanced up at you, then back down to the safety of his hands, “… and then we…”
Danny rubbed the back of his neck, making you grin wider at how cute they were being, dancing around the subject of their obvious desire for each other. 
He mumbled, “Yeah, then we were just…” 
Sam finished softly, holding his hands out in awkward offering, “…kissing.” 
You snorted, making both of them look up at you, baffled and amused as you laughed at them. 
Shaking your head, you giggled out, “That was some intense kissing.”
Sam snickered with a bratty eyeroll, and Danny chuckled awkwardly, running a hand through his curls. “Like he said, it just kinda happened.” Sam nodded his agreement, and Danny squeezed your hand. “I’m so sorry, honey. You know I’d… I’d never…” he shook his head slowly, pleadingly, and you nodded understandingly, squeezing back. 
“I know baby,” you assured, leaning forward, smiling softly when Danny immediately met you halfway for a short kiss. He smiled, relieved and loving, whispering as he pulled away reluctantly, “I love you, so so fucking much.”
You smiled back, the last of your insecurities fading away, “I love you, too, Dan.”
Sam shifted on the cushion, and you glanced at him, unable to stop the way your eyes lowered to his pouty lips. 
He watched, curious, but too shy to say anything about it so soon after such a peculiar interaction, though he noticeably glanced at yours too. He took a controlled breath through his nose, and you watched his tongue dart between his lips, wetting them with that look of longing he seemed to carry with him whenever you were around. Your heart fluttered, feeling some deja-vu with the tension that suddenly manifested in the air. 
Nobody had warned you about what comes after a threesome with your best friend. How could anyone expect you to feel and act completely normal around Sam when you had intimate visuals playing like an NSFW slideshow in your mind’s eye of how his gorgeous face twisted in pleasure as you and Danny absolutely-
Danny softly cleared his throat, and your gaze shot back to him, jarringly broken out of Sam’s spell. 
“Um…” he held your gaze, keeping your hand in his tight hold as if expecting you to run away. “Can I just say what I’m thinking, and nobody gets pissed off at me?”
You chuckled, nodding, “Please, babe, you go for it.” 
Danny inhaled deeply and blew it out through pursed lips. “I… think… that this,” he gestured vaguely, shutting his eyes as he tented his fingers over the bridge of his nose, speaking into his hands, “…is more than sex for me. A-and I think you feel the same way,” he nodded toward you, then turned to Sam, looking considerably more nervous, “…and I… well, I hope that you feel that way, too.”
Sam stared at Danny, his eyes laser focused, and after a few tense seconds, he slowly nodded. “Yeah,” he admitted in a whisper, sucking his lip between his teeth. 
Danny nodded and turned to you, raising his brows. You blushed after glancing quickly at Sam, who sat raptly watching you for your answer. “Me too.”
Danny relaxed slightly, cracking a nervous grin. “So… I dunno, where does that leave us?”
Sam licked his lips, thoughtfully trailing his eyes around the room. “Well, you guys are so disgustingly in love, it’s hard to be in the same room with,” he teased, smirking, lifting his eyes to your face. 
Your heart fluttered, smiling shyly at him, and he grinned back, tilting his head to the side. “I like you a lot, doll, I’m not afraid to admit that, I just wasn’t sure if I should.”
You giggled, a hang clutching your imaginary pearls. “What?? The Sammy I know would never hold back on saying something he shouldn’t!”
“Well, actually, I just said it anyway, so point proven.”
You moved your hand to your cheek, hiding your face a little from him as he sat back with that stupid, know-it-all smirk.
“I like you, too.”
Danny chuckled, and when you looked at him curiously, he shrugged, “This is just... so fucking weird.”
You giggled, and Sam shot him a funny look. “The fuck do you mean by that?”
Danny held out his hands in front of him, “Oh, I dunno, my girlfriend admitting she likes another guy right in front of me? Is that not a strange thing to you?” 
Sam smirked, elbowing him. “Nothing new, all your ex-girlfriends secretly wanted me, too.” 
Danny shoved Sam with a snort of laughter, “Fuck off, you know what I mean.”
Sam snickered, “Yeah, I know what you mean, but I dunno, it doesn’t feel that weird to me.”
You giggled and nodded, shrugging, and Danny grinned at you. “Yeah, that’s the thing, it doesn’t feel, like, wrong,” he agreed.
You smirked at Danny playfully, “Everything is always weird with you guys, maybe we’re just used to it.”
Sam laughed, “Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?” 
You giggled innocently, shrugging and sitting up straighter. Danny rolled his eyes playfully, shifting slightly to face Sam more directly. When he had Sam’s attention, his grin turned more serious. 
“Do you…” he trailed off, hopeful and expectant. Sam chuckled, growing bashful as he eyed Danny’s face. “Do I what?” he softly teased, “Like you?”
Danny blushed, saying nothing as he blinked at his friend. Sam licked his lips, then placed his hand back on Danny’s thigh. 
“Of course I do,” he softly confessed, his eyes tracking his own hand’s movement back and forth. 
“I’m no geometry professor, but it seems like that’s a complete triangle to me.”
Both boys laughed softly at your observation, and it fell quiet for a moment. Danny holding your hand, and Sam’s hand on Danny’s thigh, you extended your arm forward to touch Sam’s knee instinctively, closing that triangle.
Your touch made Sam’s breathing catch in his throat, and your eyes locked on each other. Your stomach erupted in butterflies all over again. 
“So… where does that leave us?” He pondered, more flirtatious than Danny had been before. 
You looked at Danny, and he smiled at you with a raise of his brows, as if to say, ‘You’re running the show, babe.’
Grinning, you looked back to Sam and said, “I mean… should we just see where this goes?”
Sam leaned toward you a little more, “Yeah, fine by me,” he grinned. 
Danny nodded, “Should probably have some ground rules, though.”
You smiled as you toyed with the rip in Sam’s jeans. “Probably, yeah, you whores.” 
Sam barked out a laugh, and Danny blushed, giggling to himself. 
“Kay,” Sam shook his head, amused, “Well, how do we feel about like, fucking without one of us there?”
You smiled wide, shyly giggling at his bluntness as you thought for a minute. You were about to answer when Danny spoke up, “I think I’m okay with that, if you are, sweetheart.”
You grinned shyly, heart fluttering under the suggestive heat of Sam’s smirk. “I’m okay with it too. I mean, I’d like to know about it, preferably, but I know things just happen sometimes. As long as we communicate, I don’t have a problem with it.”
Sam leaned back into the couch cushion, folding his arms behind his head with that self-assured, cocky smirk stretching his lips. “Well then, lucky me,” he purred. 
You bit your lip, failing to conceal a bashful smirk as you ignored him. “Are you guys gonna tell Jake and Josh?”
Danny glanced at Sam, who shook his head dismissively. “Those nosy assholes don’t need to know what I do with my dick,” he said bluntly, making you laugh and nod. "I'm not gonna hide it, but I'm not gonna make some weird, confusing announcement."
Danny gave a soft smile and shrugged his indifference. “S’up to you, baby.”
Sam’s eyes widened at the pet name, and you smiled wide, surprised but endeared as you watched Danny’s shoulders stiffen, his lips parting in surprise at himself as his cheeks flushed pink. 
Sam blushed even brighter, a crooked grin finding its way across his face. “Oh,” he said quietly, looking absolutely smitten.
Danny broke into an embarrassed smile, chuckling awkwardly, “I- sorry, I-“ 
Sam shook his head as he leaned forward, lips pressing over Danny’s to shut him up, and Danny let out the cutest little upward-lilted coo of surprise. Sam smiled visibly against his lips, and Danny melted, kissing him back gently, bringing his free hand up to cup Sam’s face. 
You squeezed Danny’s hand longingly, and he pulled away with a flustered smile. He beckoned you over, “C’mere, baby,” scooching to the side and patting the space between him and Sam. 
You quickly switched seats, turning your head to Danny first once settled. He smiled down at you lovingly, so familiar and gentle, and you felt safe. You leaned forward and met his lips in a soft kiss, melting into the sweet warmth of his mouth as he deepened it with a low hum. 
A hand came to rest on your thigh, and you broke from your boyfriend to face its owner, smiling boyishly at you, his eyes hopefully dipping to your lips and back. You nodded almost imperceptibly, and Sam’s smile widened, leaning forward until his lips met yours. 
And God, did this feel good. Sandwiched again between them, even better than the first time now that you were all on the same page. Danny’s lips latched onto your exposed neck, and you let a moan of surprise permeate the kiss, the sound egging on Sam. His cute button-tipped nose brushed your cheek as he enthusiastically indulged in your kisses. 
He slid his hand further up your lap, bunching the fabric of your flowy shorts up around your hips as he kneaded and pawed at your inner thigh. When he swiped his fingers beneath the hem over your bare skin, you shivered, and he was pulled back to reality, parting from the kiss with a sharp, wet sounding gasp for air. His eyes fluttered open, pupils dilated as they focused. 
Danny’s hand mirrored Sam’s, slipping between your legs to squeeze the flesh of your other inner thigh. You bit your lip, a rush of heat making your brain lag for a second, your eyelids fluttering. Danny smirked as he sucked at the delicate skin behind your ear. 
“Mmmhhh,” you softly whined, brows knitting as Sam’s nose brushed your cheek, teasing you with his lips millimeters away. 
“You want me?” he rasped in a whisper, the corners of his ridiculously attractive lips quirking up when you nodded weakly and whined, “Yeah, Sammy.”
Danny lifted his face from your abused neck, licking a line up your racing jugular as he ascended. You whimpered, struggling to keep your eyes open already, something a very smug Danny seemed to notice. 
Murmuring seductively against your cheek, he smirked, “You want me too? You want us both, baby?” He nudged at your cheek with his beautifully arched nose, and Sam’s fingers rubbed gently teasing patterns up and down your inner thigh. 
You let out a tortured sigh, losing the fight and closing your eyes. “Oh god… yeah.”
Nimble bass fingers untied the string holding your shorts around your hips as one drumstick calused palm scraped gently down to curl under your knee. Danny waited until Sam had wiggled your shorts past your ass to take over and tug them off, your foot flicking them off to the side. He mouthed his lips along the shell of your ear as he lifted your knee, bending your leg to rest one foot on the cushion. 
Sam’s eyes threatened to stare a hole into the damp spot forming through the baby blue cotton between your legs. He licked his lips, placing his hand over your lower abdomen, as he snuck a quick glance at you and Danny. You spread your thighs a little further, smirking as the boys’ eyes met and Danny’s hand slid up your thigh with an inviting nod between your legs. 
Gently, locking eyes with you, Sammy smoothed his hand down, tucking his fingers under your panties and grazing his middle fingertip down and back up through your folds. Sam’s eyelids drooped with lust as he sighed out a low groan, “Oh my god, you’re wet.”
Danny purred against your cheek as he watched your underwear stretch over his friend’s knuckles. “Oh yeah? What a good girl, baby, dripping all over his hand.”
Your eyes closed of their own accord, a humiliating whimper slipping unexpectedly past your lips. 
A second set of lips evened out Danny’s, tugging at your other earlobe and flicking his tongue against it. Sam’s fingers spread you open, rubbing in loose, lazy circles. The slick noises drew a growl from Danny’s chest, and you fluttered your eyes open weakly, only to catch Danny’s tongue wetting his fingers. His eyes flashed dangerously at you as he closed his lips around them, the light catching the glisten from his saliva as he pulled them out and joined Sam’s party for one in your panties. 
You moaned sharply as you felt Danny’s fingers take over circling your clit, switching into tighter, faster circles, while Sam’s middle and ring finger slowly curled into your heat. 
Your head rolled against the back cushion, looking up at Sammy as he lifted his face away. Your needy and glazed over expression made his nostrils flare in hunger, and his lips parted absently. “How’s it feel, beautiful girl?” he rasped quietly. “Our fingers feel nice?”
You whimpered, brows tightly knit as you bucked against both their hands, working away at your wet center in incredible synchrony. “So nice, I fucking-“ a deeper curl of his fingers had you keening pathetically. “-shit, like that, yeah,” you mewled. 
“Yeah?” he cocked a smug eyebrow, “S’that the spot?” He drug the pads of his fingers against your walls, and gave you a dirty smirk when you jolted and whined. Danny’s fingers paused their languid circles, his pointer and middle finger parting and slipping down along either side of your clit, squeezing together in a slippery hug as he pulled them back up. 
Your jaw hung open, your gaze unfocusing as you blinked distantly at the ceiling. You heard Sam’s dark chuckle by your ear as Danny returned to his expert massage to your clit. 
Craving more, more friction, more of them, you swallowed dryly. “Fuck me?” you softly pleaded, voice hoarse already. 
Danny playfully nipped the apple of your cheek, whispering teasingly, “Who? Me or Sam?”
Sammy echoed, “Yeah doll, who’s cock d’you want?” 
As his fingers pumped in and out of you faster, Danny moved his lips back to the shell of your ear, nibbling gently and murmuring with that low, breathy voice. “We both wanna be inside you so bad.” 
“So fuckin’ bad, beautiful, you got me addicted to that tight little pussy,” Sam confirmed, a touch of begging in his tone contrasting deliciously with Danny’s domineering rumble. 
You whined, reaching your hands up to grab at both boy’s necks, rolling your hips into their talented hands. “Both, I- fucking christ- both of you, take turns, or whatever you want, please?” 
Sam’s forehead plopped against your temple as he breathed out a strained whimper. “Shit,” he breathed. 
Danny removed his fingers from your clit, his hand rising to your chin. He grabbed your face firmly, his two glistening fingers forcing into your mouth as he turned you to face him. You sucked his fingers, lapping lazily at the pads of them as you slowly focused your eyes on his gorgeous, pleased face. His filthy, challenging grin would’ve had your knees buckling had you been standing. 
“Aren’t you just the sweetest little whore,” he grit the last word through his teeth, his grip tightening slightly around your jaw. You inhaled sharply through your nose and nodded around his hand as best you could. 
“What a naughty little thing,” came Sam’s voice, far too smug for your liking. “You a little slutty for us, babe?”
Jesus christ. 
Danny’s hand suddenly let go, and in a flash, Sam found himself in the same boat that you were just in, locked into your boyfriend’s firm grip. 
“Not sure where you’re getting all this attitude from, Sammy,” he all but sneered, Sam’s shuddery inhale threatening to bring a smirk to your face. 
“I was just- ah!” Danny slipped his hand around to tighten his fist around Sam’s hair, tugging at the root near the back of the brunette’s head, effectively interrupting his pitiful excuses. 
“You what?” Danny smirked, slowly rising to his feet as he leaned over Sam’s face. 
Sam’s eyes, wide and submissive, blinked up at him as he licked his lips nervously. “Nothing…!”
Danny cocked his head, arrogantly shaking his head and hovering his lips just out of Sam’s pouted reach. “Good boy,” he purred. 
Sam’s eyes flew shut as he bit back a groan. 
You curled your fingers sweetly around Danny’s bicep, fixing him with a pleading look. When he met your eyes, you fluttered your eyelashes and asked, “Bedroom?”
Danny grinned at you rather ferally, then gave a quick nod and grabbed both yours and Sam’s hands. 
He marched you both down the hall, you and Sam sharing a quick, bashfully excited grin from the corner of your eyes before Danny gently but firmly turned you around to the bed and pushed you down, side by side and equally impatient for his next move. 
Danny stepped over you first, brushing a gentle hand along your cheek as he gazed down at you tenderly. “Can you be my sweet girl and sit quiet for a minute, baby?” 
You smiled and nodded up at him, pressing a chaste kiss to his wrist. He thumbed once over your cheek and smiled back sweetly, booping your nose just to hear your giggle before he stepped over in front of Sam.
Sam leaned back on his arms, paying close attention as the drummer stood before him. Danny brought a hand to Sam’s cheek, much like yours, and his eyes followed as he trailed his fingers lightly down Sammy’s neck and collarbones. 
Sam’s breathing stuttered, licking his lips as he let Danny’s delicate touch brush admiringly across his upper half. “What about me?” he challenged softly, flustered but smirking playfully nonetheless. 
Danny raised a brow, lifting his heavy gaze to Sam’s, before placing his palm firmly in the center of Sammy’s chest and shoving him down flat on his back. Sam gasped, the sound choked and ending with a garbled whine as Danny followed, crawling over top of him to hover over his lithe form.
Gripping the bassist’s jaw lightly, Danny brushed his lips ever so faintly against Sam’s as he murmured lowly, “You wanna be a good boy for me, too?”
Sam’s wide eyes blinked up at Danny in a sort of lustful awe, nodding his head and licking his lips. A smirk creeped across Danny’s lips, nodding along teasingly as he brushed their lips together again. 
With the most arrogant, shit-eating tone, he rumbled low in his chest, “Yeah? Are you daddy’s good boy?”
Sam’s face flushed wildly as his eyes closed tight, but the moan he tried to conceal was unmistakable. Though as pathetically needy as Sam surely felt, you could swear you had it worse. Arousal coursed through your veins like adrenaline, and it threatened to send you into cardiac arrest, as your boyfriend groaned like he’d tasted the finest wine and his tongue languidly slipped through his parted lips to lick across Sam’s pouted ones. 
Sam slunk his arms around Danny’s neck, pulling the man down on top of him into a deep, needy kiss. His long fingers raked through the drummers silken curls, his brows furrowing as he sighed a moan of satisfaction into the kiss. Stealthily, Danny shuffled his knees up around Sam’s hips to balance himself, then smoothed his hands up the wiry arms that held him in place. He then gracefully pried Sam’s hands away, taking them in his own, still slow and sweet, before pinning them above his head and breaking the kiss, biting his lip at Sam’s bratty little whine. 
You found the presence of mind, through the absolute brain fog of arousal, to cheekily goad them on. “Little desperate, aren’t we Sammy?”
Sam’s head whipped over to you, jaw dropping as he prepared to retort with a sassy comeback, but Danny eradicated any chance of that with a firm roll of his hips into Sam’s stiff crotch. 
“Aht,” he warned, “Don’t make me shut you up, Sammy.” 
Instantly, your cheek was forgotten, as the bassist bit his lip. Once again doe-eyed and smirking for Danny, Sam murmured with a shake in his voice, “…and, uh, for curiosity’s sake… how would you do that exactly?”
Raising an eyebrow at him, Danny wordlessly gripped Sam’s jaw in his broad hand, and when Sam’s jaw instinctively fell open between his thumb and fingers, his open mouth was promptly filled with Danny’s pointer and middle fingers. You watched Danny’s eyes droop in lust as Sam’s widened submissively, obediently closing his lips around the callused digits and sucking demurely. 
“There’s plenty of ways I can occupy your smart little mouth,” Danny sneered arrogantly, “The only problem is finding one that you won’t fucking like so much.”
You ventured a hand over to lightly rub over Sam’s chest, amusement evident in your cheeky addition, “That’s awful slutty of you, Sammy.” 
Danny’s shoulders stiffened, and he kept his eyes on Sam as he warned, “Glass houses, babygirl, glass houses.”
Sam’s smirk became clearer when Danny slipped his fingers out of his mouth. “Yeah, sweetheart, glass houses,” he mocked condescendingly. 
You shot him a petulant glare. “I thought you were told to shut up? Or are you not daddy’s good boy?”
Sam tried to sit up indignantly, blushing, but was restricted by your boyfriend still pinning him to the mattress. His mouth opened with another smart ass remark, but a snarl from Danny’s chest stole the words from his tongue. 
“Enough! Not another fucking word from either of you,” he barked, shooting Sam a dominant, warning look as he straightened off of him with a final, parting squeeze to his jaw. 
You both watched Danny nervously as he loomed over you both, running his tongue over his teeth. 
“Up,” he grit, tipping his head back. 
You stumbled to your feet, but Sam’s bratty streak flared up full force, and he cocked a sassy eyebrow and eyed up Danny challengingly. “Why?” he huffed. 
You rolled your eyes with a knowing smirk, and Danny smoothly articulated, “Because I told you to, Samuel, and you will listen to me, or you won’t like what happens next.” 
Sam scoffed but clambered to his feet beside you, and Danny gave him a condescending smile. “Good.” He leaned back on his hands against your shared dresser and eyed you both admiringly. “Now take each other’s clothes off.”
You looked up at Danny as you echoed his command back in your head. He met your eyes and gave you a smug smile, winking at you. You blushed and smiled back, then giggled as you felt Sam’s hand on your shoulder. 
Facing him, he fixed you with that butterfly-inducing, boyish smirk of his. He rested his hands at your shoulders and bit his lip. Those hands began roaming, from your shoulders towards the hem of your shirt, as slowly and patiently as his eagerness allowed, taking his time to subtly palm at your tits through the fabric. 
“Mmm… he doesn’t have to tell me twice,” Sam softly flirted, lifting his honey brown eyes from your midsection to meet your flustered gaze. 
Lopsidedly smiling, you helped him lift your shirt over your head and quickly began working his pants off. “First time for everything, I suppose,” you teased, dropping to your knees to tug his pants down his thighs. 
Sam’s breath hitched, his brain rebooting at the sight of you below him like that, and pride bloomed in your chest from his lack of a sassy retort. 
His briefs, caught in the bunch of fabric, were pulled down as well, and the tip of his erection grazed your chin as it sprung up. Nearly forgetting about the third party watching silently beside you, you leaned forward instinctively and kitten licked over the delicate slit at the tip of Sammy’s cock. 
His resulting hiss of surprise was almost lost under Danny’s softly, but rigid order, “Nope, I said undress, not suck his dick, get up.”
You blinked over at Danny, pouting, “But Danny, I-“
He shifted his weight, cocking an unimpressed brow at you, and you gave up, rising to your feet to level yourself with the boy who was suddenly singing a very different tune.
Sam wordlessly rushed to tug your panties down past your ass, letting them drop to the floor and stepping even closer to you as he reached around behind your ribcage to nimbly unclasp your bra. His fingers slipped under the straps, brushing them off your shoulders and letting it fall to the ground, his hands immediately cupping and squeezing your tits appreciatively. The softest breathy moan breezed past his lips, but now it was Sam’s turn to be interrupted. 
“Sam. Bed,” Danny grit, “On your back.”
Sam’s eyes flashed with that same needy, aroused glaze, obeying Danny, even giving him a little nod as he sat at the edge of the bed, swinging his legs up and laying flat, lacing his hands over his stomach as he turned his head to look up at you both patiently. 
“Good boy,” Danny purred, sounding pleasantly surprised and pleased, and he tipped his head back to peer at Sam down his nose. You licked your lips, watching Sam’s cock twitch against his flexing stomach with longing. 
Danny’s fingers brought you out of your daze, tipping up your chin as he smirked down at you. “Hi, beautiful,” he sweetly brushed the back of his hand over your cheek, and you smiled lovingly up at his gorgeous face, preening under his praise. “Can you do me a favor, my love?” 
Your heart fluttered as you rested a hand on his chest and nodded, “Yeah, gorgeous, what do you need?” 
He casted a playful glance in Sam’s direction before refocusing on you fondly. “I want you to go sit on his lap, and then do exactly as I tell you. Can you do that?”
“Yes, Daddy,” you replied, seductively playful, thoroughly enjoying the way his jaw clenched subtly through his slow inhale. He shook his head fondly, lightly smacked your ass, and you gave him a cheeky grin and turned on your heel, climbing onto the bed beside Sam’s lithe form. 
“Hey,” you flirted, planting your hands on his chest and swinging one leg over his hips to seat yourself atop him, his cock parting your slick lips, pressed between you and his abdomen in a wet hug.
His gasp shuddered out of him and was joined by his hands shooting to hold your hips tightly. His fingers flexed tight, white knuckling the flesh. “Ohh, god, you little devil,” he grinned lazily, struggling to not buck into you. 
Smirking down at him, you brought your thumb to your mouth, wetting the pad of it and dropping it down to rub circles gently into the delicate, vulnerable underside of the head of his cock.
Sam whined, wincing in surprised pleasure as his head rolled sideways, face burying into the pillow as he writhed under you. “Shitshitshit-“
“Okay, hands off now.”
You lifted your hand immediately, shooting a proud grin Danny’s way when Sam sighed from either disappointment or relief, you couldn’t be sure. 
Pleased with your listening, Danny cocked his head and drank in the sight of you both. Your attention was drawn to the movement below his waist, absently rolling your hips into Sam’s as you watched your boyfriend rubbing over his bulge. 
“Mmm- Danny,” Sam choked, swallowing hard, “What now?”
Danny hummed thoughtfully, casually popping open the button of his jeans. “Grind on him, princess.”
Nodding quickly, you started rutting your hips against Sam’s steadily, slipping his length up and down through your folds. Sam hissed, his eyelids fluttering closed as his brows tipped up in the middle. His face the picture of pleasure, he moaned softly, encouraging you with his hands kneading and pulling at your hips. “Fuuuuuck, sweetheart,” he rasped.
Danny grinned, a dangerous gleam in his expression. “Stop.”
You bit your lip hard, reluctantly stilling atop him. Sam huffed, lolling his head impatiently to face Danny, unimpressed and pouting. Danny snickered at his expression, nodding his permission to you to keep going. 
You kept your eyes on your boyfriend’s as you wiggled slowly forward and back, your stomach flipping with anticipation as Sam’s cock slipped frictionless through your folds. Danny’s little smirk morphed into something darker, tugging his zipper down as he held the heated eye contact. His fingers slipped beneath the band of his boxers, and he flicked his gaze to where you were soaking his best friend’s cock rhythmically. 
“Stop,” he articulated again.
Sam expelled a puff of air beneath you, and you were broken away from Danny’s spell. Glancing down at the man beneath you, you had to bite back a whimper, fighting not to disobey Danny’s instruction. Sam’s face twisted in his growing frustration, his forehead beginning to shine with sweat. It had you suddenly realizing just how hot it had become in the room, three bodies warming the space with the heat of the growing, restless neediness. 
Sam swallowed harshly, “Wish you weren’t such a good little girl for him.” His eyes flashed up to meet yours, a teasing glint peeking through his frustration. Danny huffed a smug laugh beside you.
You giggled softly, dropping your gaze to his nipple as you swiped a thumb over it, rolling it against your forefinger. “Oh yeah?”
He sighed and let his head lean to the side as he gazed up at you, fond and needy through those long lashes. “Mhmm. I think you should be my good girl,” he rasped, rolling his hips enticingly, sending the tip of his cock slipping just barely, teasingly, into your clit.
You whined softly, acutely aware of the man leaning against the dresser beside you, watching you both interact quietly. 
Sam watched you lick your lips longingly, and he smirked, smoothing his hands up your sides slowly. “Sounds nice, doesn’t it, gorgeous? You wanna listen to me instead? I’ll let you do whatever you want to me,” he finished with a seductive, raspy whisper, punctuating it with a squeeze to your tits as he reached his destination, cupping and massaging them. 
Your lips parted with a breathy moan, fighting every urge to give in to the temptation he dangled in front of you. 
You met his eyes again, apologetically, regretfully shaking your head. 
You could feel Danny’s proud, wide grin without even glancing at him. “Good girl, sweetheart,” he praised, pushing off the dresser and stalking toward the bed. Once he’d reached your side, plastering himself along your body, he purred, “God I love you.” He bit down on the back of your shoulder, earning a shaky whine from you through your smile. 
You craned your neck, peering at him through your eyelashes, the way that made his knees weak for you. Danny’s face softened further, taking your face in one hand as the other wrapped around your middle. He captured your lips in a needy kiss, insistently taking another kiss the second each one would end. You melted back against his solid chest, the change in your seating position cruelly dragging your slit against Sam’s neglected length. 
A helpless, sweet whine eminating from below you brought both your attentions to Sammy, laid out beautifully unraveled against the sheets. He watched your kiss with longing eyes, and his swollen tip peeking out from between your lips was a dark shade of pink. 
Danny rested his chin over your shoulder, hugging you with both arms from behind as he raised a brow at Sam, smirking lightly. “What?” he teased, deliberately clueless.
Sam furrowed his brow and rolled his eyes, centering his focus on Danny’s face. “Oh, nothing,” he retorted sarcastically.
Danny ignored him, turning his face in to tuck into your neck, his breath tickling your neck. You giggled as he brushed his nose against your shoulder. “Okay then,” he smirked. Kissing and loving on your skin and deliberately making you squirm, knowing full well how each wiggle he coerced out of you was driving Sam crazier.
Sam grit his teeth, hissing as you jerked your hips against him suddenly, his grip on your hips stiffening as he growled, “Fucking stop it already!”
Danny raised a brow and emerged from your neck, gazing arrogantly down at the bratty demand. “What was that?” he muttered lowly, warning Sam with his tone. 
As usual, Sam ignored the warning and proceeded full throttle. “I said stop it! I need- I need more, just-“ He fought against your weight, grinding weakly into you and making you whimper softly. His voice came out breathless and rough when he pleaded, “C’mon, enough fucking around, let me fuck her.”
If anybody had’ve asked, you wouldn’t have been able to tell them how much you would’ve loved the way Sam bypassed you, going directly to your boyfriend for permission to use your body. It was somehow simultaneously degrading and empowering, and with your affinity for both praise and degradation, the confusing combination worked like a charm for you. 
Feeding into both of these kinks, Danny toyed his fingers down your lower abdomen, grazing the tips against your clit and the tip of Sam’s cock as he responded, “Well isn't that just a damn shame, Sammy. You were so close, too.”
Sam furrowed his brow incredulously, “Close? To what? Losing my mind?”
Danny chuckled humorlessly, “To getting what you wanted. You were being so good,” he tsked. “Oh well, you made your bed, now.”
Sam sputtered, and let out a stuttery whine as you ground against Danny’s fingers, and by extension, his aching cock. “Fuuuck, please,” he groaned, “Let me in, let me- oh-“
Danny copied your move, circling his thumb, wet from your soaking pussy, into Sam’s frenulum, smirking evilly when the boy squirmed and jerked beneath you. His anguished bucking hips had you weakly leaning back into Danny’s chest for support, and the two of you falling apart beneath his control had Danny’s cock pounding in his pants. 
Finally Danny removed all contact, stepping back from the bed as you fell forward onto Sam’s chest for support. Both of you looked up at him with matching pleading, lost expressions.
Danny’s lips quirked up in a smile as he shoved his pants down and caught onto your needy faces.  
“Well god, don’t look so pathetic,” he cooed, “Both of you, breaking my heart over here. Just be patient, I’ll make it worth it.” 
He bit his lip as he watched you both closely, pushing his briefs down his thighs, his cock twitching in the air under both your desperate stares. 
Taking himself in hand loosely, he instructed, “Roll over, babes. Sammy on top now.”
Sam flushed at the endearment, and you smiled to yourself. You managed to roll off, onto your back, and wiggle into Sam’s place as Sam fit himself between your thighs on his knees. He stared shamelessly at your spread open lips, biting back a soft groan, and your stomach twisted with excited butterflies, opening your thighs wider teasingly. 
“God,” he sighed, licking his lips as his eyes lidded heavily. Sam began leaning forward, his face nearing your folds, but instead groaned and rested his forehead against your stomach when Danny barked, “Stop.”
“Whyyyy?” Sam whined, muffled against your tummy. “I want her so fucking bad, Danny,” he lifted his head, begging Danny with his eyes. “Why not? Please, baby,” he whimpered softly. 
Danny’s face softened in surprise and affection. “Sammy, babe…” 
Sam closed his eyes, his cheeks flushed pink as he continued, “I want you both, I wanna fuck her, I want you, I want- just, please, Danny, anything, please, I-“
Danny, in two strides, was back with one knee up on the edge of the bed, crashing his lips against Sam’s desperately. Sam moaned, wrapping an arm around Danny’s strong midsection, the other hand resting on your thigh, gripping and kneading at the flesh, seemingly to feel grounded to both of you. 
Danny reluctantly pulled back, pecking Sam’s lips a few times in a drawn out apologetic goodbye. Breathless, he rested his forehead against Sam’s and looked into his eyes as best he could in their proximity. 
“Let’s take care of this, yeah?” He murmured, running his hand down Sam’s front smoothly, past his navel, wrapping his broad hand firmly around Sam’s achingly hard, slick-dampened cock. 
Sammy nodded, shallow and desperately, rocking himself through Danny’s grip with a sigh of relief that melted his entire body against Danny’s, much like yours had just done. Danny wrapped his free arm around Sam’s waist, supporting him, and used his leverage point there to grind his own erection into the plush of Sam’s ass.
Danny inhaled Sam’s sweet musky scent, burying his nose in the boy’s hair as he groaned under his breath at the relieving contact to his neglected cock. With one more roll of his hips, he straightened out, steadying Sam overtop of you before crawling onto the bed behind him. 
Sam craned his head curiously, but Danny placed a soothing hand to his shoulderblades, thumbing reassuringly as he got himself settled comfortably. He positioned himself behind Sam, a sort of vertical big-spoon around the lithe bassist. 
You bit your lip in anticipation as the addition of another body atop the bed pushed your thighs open wider to accommodate Danny. Sam’s lips parted in awe as he caught glimpse of the light catching the delicate strings of your wetness decorating your parted lips. His eyes shot closed with a whimper though, as Danny gave a smooth rock of his hips against his ass.
Danny, now firmly plastered skin-to-skin against Sam’s back, reached around Sammy’s front and took his cock in hand. He leaned them both forward, forcing Sam onto his hands and knees above you. Sam gasped, Danny’s cock grinding between his ass cheeks as he loosely jerked Sam off. 
You reached down, and Sam fluttered his eyes open at the movement, catching your gaze and locking eyes, electric and intense as you swirled your fingers around your clit. Your jaw fell open a bit, and the relief had your eyes rolling back slightly with a sigh. The sight of it had Sam exhaling through his nose harshly as though the wind had been punched out of him. 
Danny lowly rumbled in his ear, “Push forward a bit, sweet boy.”
Sam shivered, obeying and letting his hips droop forward until the tip of him caught against your entrance. Danny kept his eyes locked on the contact of his cock against your pussy from over Sam’s shoulder, angling his jaw to the side to kiss and nip the bottom of Sammy’s jaw. “Good,” he breathed, “You just let me do all the work.” 
Sam whined and nodded, blinking sluggishly. 
Danny gave his cock a few pumps, twisting loosely at the tip after each pass, the head of him torturously pressing at your entrance. At Sam’s shudder of pleasure, he grinned lightly, slapping Sam’s cock against your clit with a few filthy smacks. 
You gasped, whimpering and arching into it, “Danny- Sam-“ Their names rolling off your tongue instinctively was like sexual whiplash, and you panted, lost for words.
Sam weakly chuckled, lifting his head to peer at you through his lashes. “Yeah, tell me about it.”
Danny nipped at the shell of Sam’s ear playfully, using his thumb as leverage to hold Sam’s length close and snug to your folds. He then rocked into Sam’s ass, forcing Sam’s cock through the tight squeeze and causing a feral moan to slip unrestricted past the boy’s lips. You gasped, tossing your head back as the sudden, focused contact to your clit sparked intensely through your body. You cupped and groped at your tits absent-mindedly as Danny continued to second-hand thrust Sam into you. 
Both boys locked eyes on you hungrily, but you were oblivious, eyes closed and brows tipped up in pleasure from the steady rubbing of the ridge of Sam's head against your clit. Moaning weakly, you pinched your own nipple, head lolling to the side. “Yes,” you whined, “Fuck yes, oh my god…”
Danny growled near Sam’s ear, abandoning your combined groins. He brought his hand at Sam’s hip up to wrap around the front of Sam’s throat, a sight that stole your breath as you fluttered your eyes open. Sam hoarsely keened as Danny opened his mouth and licked a hot, filthy line from the base of Sam’s neck to his jaw, sealing the move with hot open-mouthed kisses to Sam’s jaw and cheek, finally meeting Sam’s lips hungrily in a sloppy, feral kiss. 
Squeezing his throat cautiously, Sam encouraged him with a cut-off groan, sucking on his tongue. Danny moaned, his grip tightening at both sides of his neck, parting from Sam’s lips to mumble, “Want me to fuck your ass?” 
Sam’s knees buckled, Danny’s hand shooting from his neck to wrap around his middle again in support, a breathy humorless chuckle at the wanton reaction. 
Sam gulped, his eyes wide and dark as he opened them, fixing them on Danny’s face. “Fuck me,” he rasped, “Fuck me right into her pussy, Daddy.”
Danny’s nostrils flared, his jaw falling open, and he breathed so quiet against Sam’s lips, “Oh god-“
With your front row seat to their little show, you felt lightheaded with desire. Equally desperate as Sam to get Danny’s cock in his ass, you took it upon yourself to reach over to the nightstand, fumbling and grasping the bottle of lube and presenting it to Danny like a present. 
Danny took it with shaky hands, shooting you a fucked-out smile of thanks. You smiled back, biting your lip as Danny kissed Sam’s shoulder, then guided him forward overtop of you on his hands. 
Sam met your eyes as Danny flipped open the cap behind him, giving you a lazy, dirty grin. You smirked, taking one of his hands and using it to grope your breast. Sam’s fingers molded around the curve of it, licking his lips hungrily as Danny began slicking up his own cock. The slick wet noises got your heart racing with arousal, and Sam clearly felt it too, as he dove forward and captured your nipple between his pouted, kiss swollen lips. You gasped, burying your fingers in his silky hair as he sucked at you. 
You felt his groan acutely, vibrating sparks of pleasure to your core, as Danny’s lubed up fingers slipped between Sam’s cheeks. He pressed one finger inside Sam’s hole, not wasting any time and slipping in all the way in one smooth motion, and Sam abandoned your boobs as his mouth fell open with a loud, wanton moan, the side of his face smacking bonelessly against your sternum. 
Danny grunted lowly, eyes flickering between his finger encased in Sam’s tight heat and your disheveled faces, hair clinging to both your foreheads with sweat. 
He pumped his finger slowly in and out, then curled it towards the root of Sam’s cock, and the bassist whined, high-pitched and drawn out against your breast, “Fuuuuuuuuuck, Danny!” 
You stroked and pet Sam’s head as Danny slipped a second finger in alongside the first, fingering him a little faster and targeting that sweet little spot inside Sam’s body. High in his throat, Sam let out a choked cry, biting down gently into the flesh of your breast, making you hiss. 
Muffled around his mouthful of your boob, Sam weakly pleaded, “Please, baby, fuck me!”
Danny groaned at his begging, his eyes shooting closed as he bit his lip hard, rutting against Sam’s ass cheek. 
“You ready for me, pretty boy?” he rumbled. 
Sam sobbed out a quiet moan, nodding into your chest as he squeezed your tits in his hands, effectively smothering his blushing face in your cleavage. “Mhmm,” he mumbled. “Do it.”
Danny grasped himself, slapping his own slick cock against Sam’s wet, lubed up entrance a few times, before lining up and pressing his head past the tight ring of Sam’s hole. 
They both groaned in sync, Danny’s relieved, deep groan pairing harmoniously with Sam’s whimpered, pathetic, pleading one. The sounds they made, the visual of Danny’s pleasure-wracked face, the sweaty, submissive boy clinging to you like a shaking leaf, all of it reduced you to a feral, desperate mess of arousal. Pinned as you were beneath them both, you felt it as Danny rocked tentatively into Sam, pulling out and pushing in a little further with each thrust. Sam’s soft cries climbed up in register each time, until his voice sounded feminine and so deliciously submissive, you weren’t sure how Danny hadn’t already lost it and coated his walls already. You felt near the precipice of an orgasm as it was, and you’d hardly even been touched yet. 
Danny slowed his thrusts, his jaw clenching with restraint as he gripped Sam’s hips. He licked his lips and bent forward, his arm snaking around Sam’s waist again, and taking his leaking erection in hand. 
“Baby?” your boyfriend softly called, and you reached down readily, brushing his hand affectionately and helping him guide Sam’s cock to your entrance.
"Okay," you confirmed shakily. You were losing your mind, you felt so ready to be filled. 
Danny braced himself, and Sam flexed forward flexibly, allowing Danny to push forward into Sam, which in turn, pushed Sam fully into you, all in one slick smooth motion. 
“Sammy, fuck-“ your jaw fell open loosely, panting and bucking into him as Danny retreated them both and fucked back into you exploratively. 
Sam’s lips parted with a steady, unintelligible stream of filth, moaning and keening as Danny used him like his own personal toy, pushing and withdrawing from your soaking core in an uncoordinated, but incredibly erotic and nonetheless enjoyable dance. 
Slowly, with a bit of fumbling, the three of you found a rhythm that worked, similar to the first night, but instead of Sammy holding himself still and getting fucked from both sides, you and Danny limited your movements to a light rolling motion, and Sam rocked himself back and forth, both fucking himself into you, and back around Danny’s pulsing cock. 
“God Sammy- uh- fuck, so tight, babe,” Danny praised, his voice rough and strained through his pants. 
Sam whined, his shaking muscles driving his hips forward and back on pure, animal instinct. “Please, please please pleasepleaseplease…”
Danny’s grip on his hips tightened in response, and you and Sam both benefited when he used his leverage to guide Sam’s pelvis faster and harder, jerking his body back and forth between you and Danny like a game of sexual tug of war. 
Your mouth hung open loosely, losing your composure quickly as the combined physical pleasure, the angelic view of both god-like men above you, and the filth of the whole situation in general spurred you on. 
"I've never felt so fucking good in my life," Sam pathetically whined, "This was-" he gasped, "w-was all I could thing about, since the first time."
Danny moaned, his head tipping back as he drove himself deeper into Sam.
Sam was forced forward onto his elbows, and as he balanced himself, he looked up, making glazed-over eye contact with you. “Baby, I need you to cum, please fucking cum for me,” he choked out, begging you with his eyes, “His cock, it's so fuckin' good- ahh! I’m so fucking-“ he cried out a short jerky wail, “s-so fucking c-close, please.”
You wiggled your arm between your bodies, relieving the ache his words brought on with your fingers, cirling and rubbing frantically over your clit and nodding desperately, staring Sam in the eyes as your orgasm built. “Gonna-“ you gasped, your eyes fluttering shut as Danny’s hips jerked hard against you both, “…gonna cum, you’re so good, such a good boy for us, Sammy, so good, just keep- don’t stop, Sammy, fuck-“ 
Danny reared back, slamming into Sam harder, earning a loud, unabashed cry of his name from Sam’s chest, and Danny growled animalistically, smacking Sam’s ass hard, twice, in quick succession. The sting of the slaps, and the subsequent tight squeeze to the abused flesh in Danny’s wide, veiny hand, sent you careening over the edge. 
Your desperate, high-pitched cries of ecstasy drew groans from both boy’s chests, and your trembling, clenching walls squeezing so tight around Sam’s cock as it was sent pumping unforgivingly into you, sent Sam over the edge right after you, his wet release pooling hot, forbidden and dirty inside you, his own cries washing over you as you rode out the waves of your orgasm.
Danny, despite his dwindling resolve to hold off, lost himself in Sam’s clenching, pulsing heat, and in the hazy chorus of his two lover’s combined sounds of pleasure, he gave into the pleasure and spilled, hard and hot into Sam’s tight wet walls with a groan that shook his chest. 
He barely held himself up long enough to slip carefully out of Sam, then collapsed at your side, completely spent. Sammy pulled out next, whimpering at the overstimulating drag against his sensitive, slowly softening cock, and rolled just slightly to the side, laying himself mostly still on top of you. 
Danny rolled himself weakly onto his side, not bothering to open his eyes as he panted, curling into your side and wrapping his arm over your tummy, holding you close to him. Sam’s knee hitched up over your hips, his calf resting between your thighs as he, too, caught his breath in the cavern of your neck. 
Your eyes drooped closed, your entire body feeling floaty and relaxed, the tension of the day, quite literally, fucked out of you. 
Sammy’s arm, draped over your ribcage, blindly groped for Danny’s forearm, curling his long fingers around it, and Danny hummed his appreciation quietly, his arm extending a little further against your stomach to squeeze his hand around Sam’s thigh. 
As you laid there, endorphins making your entire body feel light, buzzed, happy and safe, you smiled to yourself, simply existing in the moment, in this space between your favorite boys in the world. 
Sam lazily kissed your shoulder, nuzzling further into your skin as he sighed contentedly. Danny’s chin tucked against his chest, his mouth pressed into your hair while his soft, evened out breaths fanned it out gently. 
Danny broke the silence first, humming softly, the sound shifting to a soft groan as he stretched his legs down the bed, settling back into place. “That was… incredible.”
You smiled wide, eyes still closed as you hummed your agreement, turning just enough to nuzzle into his sweaty curls that clung to his forehead, pressing a loving kiss there.
Sam remained silent, which, even if you only knew Sam for ten minutes, you’d be acutely aware of how unusual that was. You looked down at him, unable to see his face from where it was buried in your shoulder, so you shifted up on your side, settling down little-spoon style against Danny’s chest as you scooted down to level with his face. 
You soothed a hand down his side, admiring the softness of his flawless skin and smiling fondly at his pretty, boyish face, which blinked up at you almost shyly. 
“No sassy remark?” you teased quietly, your eyes crinkling fondly as you reached up to cup his cheek. 
Sam grinned lopsidedly, lowering his gaze to the sheets beneath you, his fingers fiddling with a wrinkle in them. “Nah… I’m sure one’ll come to me, though.” 
You giggled under your breath, nodding lightly. “Good, good.”
His eyes lifted to yours, big and brown and sweet, more innocent than you’d ever seen him. He stole your breath for a moment, so stunningly perfect that you couldn’t quite fathom your own luck, to bask in his beauty. 
He smiled faintly under your enveloping, warm gaze, that crooked smile widening. “Hi,” he breathed, a soft chuckle following. 
“Hi,” you returned, quiet and affectionate.
Behind you, Danny leaned up on his shoulder, resting the side of his face against your cheek, both of you admiring him. 
Sam’s cheeks pinkened as he grinned shyly, “What?”
In an uncharecteristically shy move, Danny tucked his chin into your cheek, keeping his eyes on Sam as he kissed and mumbled against your cheek, “You’re so pretty, Sammy.”
The heat from Danny’s flushed cheeks mirrored Sam’s own blush, and Sam giggled quietly, wrinkling his nose as he lazily dismissed him with a swat of his hand. “Says the literal Greek God."
Danny giggled adorably, blushing harder and making your heart clench with love.
You wedged your hand under Sam’s other cheek, pulling his head toward yours and smiling as you kissed his lips softly. Sam melted into your gentle kiss, your hands on his face, accepting and returning the gentle affection. 
The moment you released him from the kiss, Danny leaned over you and tilted his chin up. He smiled, devastatingly sweet and handsome in your side-view of him, and he flickered his eyes from Sam’s curious gaze and his mouth, leaning forward and taking his turn at Sam’s lips. Sam kissed him back readily, his eyes fluttering closed. 
You continued to pet his cheek lovingly as they basked in the slow push and pull of each other’s lips, and as soon as they separated, you completed the triangle by capturing your boyfriends mouth, smiling happily against his lips. 
Danny pulled away after a moment, slowly blinking his eyes open. He bit his lip, boyishly smiling between you and Sam, and you giggled softly, the laughter catching on as Sam chuckled, and soon the three of you were laying together in a heap of seratonin-high giggles. 
Calming down, you sighed happily.
Then Danny’s stomach growled. Loudly. 
Any semblance of peace was thrown out the window, all three of you dissolving into laughter again as Danny blushed and rolled onto his back. 
“Shut up,” he groaned, chuckling, “I haven’t eaten since nine this morning!”
Sam leaned up on his elbow, giggling at him, “Who’s fault is that, mr. come-in-for-a-drink?” 
You snorted and Danny’s jaw dropped playfully at him, “I was literally about to make lunch when you kissed me!”
You pursed your lips in a silent, ‘oooo!’, turning your gaze back to Sam in amusement. 
“Hey, nuh-uh, you kissed me first, Wagner,” he poked Danny’s shoulder with a sassy raised eyebrow.
You giggled, and Danny looked at you with wide disbelieving eyes, whispering, “He’s full of shit.” Turning to Sam, he repeated louder, “You’re full of shit!”
Sam snickered, shrugging and rolling on his back, lacing his fingers on his chest. “Whatever you say, kissy-pants.”
You snorted, “Kissy pants?” you rolled your head to face Sam incredulously. 
He grinned at you innocently, shrugging. 
Danny rolled his eyes and sat up, moving to climb off the bed. “You’re such a dork,” he said, affectionately exasperated as he grabbed a fresh pair of boxers from the dresser. Sam smirked shyly as he eyed Danny’s naked back, and subsequently blushed when you tapped the tip of his nose and winked, letting him know you caught him checking out his ass, then climbed off the bed and walked to the closet.
Sam smiled wide, despite the redness colouring his cheeks, and he kept his heart-eyes on your back as he answered Danny softly, “Yeah, but I’m your dork.”
Your face softened inside the cover of the closet, smiling so hard your cheeks hurt as you pulled a sundress off the hanger.
Danny’s hands paused within the drawer, a goofy smile making its way over his face as he distractedly pawed through shirts. “…Oh yeah?”
Sam hauled his boxers back on, biting his lip as he came up behind Danny, touching a shy hand to his side. Danny turned around, and you watched, smoothing your dress over your head from the doorway of the closet, as Danny pulled Sam’s hips flush to his. Sam grew endearingly flustered, his hands resting tentatively on Danny’s bare chest, as Danny brushed his nose against Sam’s. 
“Yeah,” Sammy murmured, looking up into Danny’s eyes, losing his breath. 
Danny playfully nipped at Sam’s lip before pecking a gentle kiss to his lips. 
He shyly kept his eyes trained on Sam’s mouth as he quietly returned, “Well I’m yours too.”
Sam chewed on his lip, and he turned his head searchingly in your direction, his face relaxing and softening fondly when he saw you, making your heart flush with affection and the reassurance you felt at his clinginess.
He held an arm out to you, and Danny smiled wider, nodding you over. You stepped into their arms, leaning your head on Sam’s shoulder. Out of your sight, Sam blinked down at the crown of your head in surprise, warmth spreading through his chest at how you’d subconsciously come to him just as readily as you came to Danny. 
Danny let his forehead lean against Sam’s again, and you straightened, kissing Sam’s cheek sweetly. Sam’s heart fluttered, overwhelmed with the double-teamed touches, and as he looked at you, still leaning the side of his forehead against Danny’s, he said quietly through the close space, “…I’m yours, too.” 
You brought your hands up to lace over his shoulder, lifting on your toes to kiss his cheek again, trailing your lips to his jaw and smiling shyly against his skin. “I’m yours too, baby,” you whispered. “I’m yours, just like I’m Danny’s.”
Danny nodded lightly, and Sam sucked on his bottom lip, eyes flickering between you both when he lifted his head straight. 
“So… uh,” he swallowed, blushing, then cracking into a bashful smile. 
You smiled wide at his shyness, tilting your head encouragingly. 
“What is it?” Danny reassuringly asked with a hand on his shoulder, thumbing at both his shoulder and at your hip subconsciously, a rush of warmth swirling in your chest. 
Sam rocked from the ball of his foot to his heels, playing off his shyness as his usual goofy playfulness. “Well, if I’m yours, and you’re mine, and I’m yours,” he nodded at you, grinning wider, “and you’re mine…” 
You giggled, raising your brows impatiently, “Yeah?”
Sam smirked at the floor, “Well, I was just thinking that, you know, that sounds a lot like I’m your guys’ boyfriend, doesn’t it?”
You felt your heart turning to a mushy puddle as the adorable question registered. “Oh,” you giggled breathlessly, certain your face was the picture of sappy joy.
Danny cooed quietly, nudging his hip sweetly against Sam’s. “It does, huh,” he nodded, matter-of-factly before cracking a wide grin. 
Sam shrugged one shoulder, his tongue poking in his cheek as he grinned to himself, nodding at the floor bashfully. When he lifted his gaze, he met your eyes, and your smile stretched even wider, grabbing his face and pulling him into a sweet, enthusiastic kiss. Sam cooed in surprise, immediately falling into the kiss and sighing against your lips. His hand came up to cup your cheek, holding you in place. 
Then Danny’s nose brushed against both your cheeks, squishing his way in and making you both separate and burst into giggles, Danny cracking up too. 
You giggled, “Wait, lets try, come back.”
Your boys’ smiling faces drew nearer again, and you wrapped your hands around the backs of their heads, pulling them into a short, strange, but cute little three-way kiss, pulling back from it with blushing cheeks and wide, bashful smiles. 
“Huh,” Danny nodded, shrugging. Sam’s eyes closed fondly as he dropped his head forward against Danny’s chest, his hand still smoothing back from your cheek into your hair, lacing into it and scratching affectionately. 
You leaned your head into Danny’s shoulder, feeling a surge of love when his strong arms wrapped around both you and Sam, holding you both into a tight hug. 
Softly, you mumbled into Danny’s upper arm, “Let’s go get some food.”
They hummed their agreement, two low, rumbly tones that felt very right together. 
Sam lifted his head then, grinning at the two of you and wiggling his eyebrows. “Our first date!"
-------- ⭐︎☽⭐︎☾⭐︎ --------
>>>Chapter 6 >>>
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letomills · 1 year
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Download: SFS / Mega
Twelve outfits for @digisims2′s Dummy Thicc body shape. All are enabled for AF, most are enabled for EF as well. All have fat and preg morphs and low to reasonable polycounts (especially if you stick to block feet).
They span all clothing categories, giving you 1 to 4 options for each. Combined with the outfits from Digi’s original post (and Agnes’s very versatile suit), you should have enough to fully dress a few Dummy Thicc sims without overt redundancy.
Swatches and details under the cut.
All recolors are standalone and BSOK’d.
1. Gimme Stitches Bustelo Outfit
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Mashup of @yuichen’s Gimme Stiches sweater, Kayleigh’s Bustelo jeans and Maxis high-top sneakers. For AF & EF, categorized as everyday. Polycount: 2,306.
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2. Capris Pin Up
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Gelydh’s Pin-Up Capris outfits + Shannanigan’s recolors. For AF & EF, categorized as everyday. Polycount: 2,040.
These outfits were also recolored by @mrs-mquve-cc​ here. And they can be found for Maxis-sized TF-AF-EF here.
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3. Asia At Odd Hours
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Vereiya’s Asia At Odd Hours dresses (based on Gelydh’s Oriental and Overground dresses). For AF only, categorized as everyday & formal. Polycount: 2,346.
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4. Jacqueline Dress
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@serabiet’s Adele Jacqueline outfit. For AF & EF, categorized as everyday and formal. Polycount: 2,170.
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5. Bustier Lingerie
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@mrs-mquve-cc’s recolors of Bruno’s Bustier Lingerie. For AF only, categorized as underwear. You’ll have to choose between a block feet mesh and a sexy feet mesh. Polycount: blockfeet: 2,170 // sexyfeet: 6,526.
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6. Intimates
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Bruno’s Intimates in the original colors + a selection of @mrs-mquve-cc recolors. For AF and EF, categorized as underwear. Same mesh as the bustier lingerie above, choose between block feet and sexy feet.
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7. Dividing Hearts PJs
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@yuichen’s Dividing Hearts PJs, in the original colors and in @datapeach‘s recolors. For AF & EF, categorized as sleepwear. You’ll have to choose between a block feet mesh and a sexy feet mesh. Polycount: blockfeet: 2,344 // sexyfeet: 6,922.
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8. Tie Bikini
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@rented-space’s 3t2 Tie Bikini in @mrs-mquve-cc’s recolors. For AF only, categorized as swimwear. You’ll have to choose between a block feet mesh and a sexy feet mesh (different from the underwear mesh, had to adjust mapping). Polycount: blockfeet: 1,948 // sexyfeet: 6,526.
(Contrary to what you might believe after a quick viewing of Digi’s set, this bikini is not already included in Digi’s set, at least not as full-body swimwear with multiple recolors and block feet option.)
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9. Swimwear Sporty
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afbodyswimwearsporty in Anna’s blue recolor + 7 more I made based on it. For AF & EF, categorized as swimwear. You’ll have to choose between a block feet mesh and a sexy feet mesh. Polycount: blockfeet: 2,024 // sexyfeet: 6,602.
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10. Leotard
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afbodyleotardsimple in recolors by Kate from Parsimonious (on this page), Maxis (+ black tights edit by me) and Emosims (textures found here). For AF & EF, categorized as athletic. Polycount: 2,152.
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11. Leotard Leg Warmers
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afbodyleotardsimple combined with Maxis legwarmers (made pantless and recolored by Spacedoll here). The bright leotard colors are by Kaputt-Geliebt, the legwarmers’ colors I made based on Spacedoll’s colors. For AF and EF, categorized as athletic. Polycount: 2,292.
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12. 8-button Coat
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Yuxi’s 8-button coat (find all Yuxi’s stuff here) in the original colors + @mrs-mquve-cc​’s recolors (did I mention that I love mrs-mquve’s recolors?). For AF & EF (even though I forgot to get elders to model for the swatch), categorized as outerwear. Polycount: 4,174.
~~~
Please let me know if you find any issues. I’m curious to see how many people are interested in this body shape. I intend to make more clothing for it in the near future, as well as correlated skins. Edit: skins are here.
160 notes · View notes
ms-scarletwings · 9 months
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That Speculative Analysis About Irkens No One (Originally) Asked For: Part III
Hey! Huge thanks to everyone who took an interest in the first two parts of this fun I got into about Jhonen Vasquez’s funny green guys. I didn’t really expect to kind of rebound back into this old flame the way I have been lately and it’s actually a pleasant surprise that other fans have been getting something out of it and enabling my latest thinkworms.
Check out the part one of this extended analysis here, for broad tids and bits about Planet Irk and the mention of its inhabitants being basically cyborgs.
Part Two, takes on Irken physiology and focusing on their tissue differences from humans, here.
So alright, I’ve been holding this one in since the very start. Previously, I brushed the topic of the control brains, and I’ve sorta gestured acknowledgement toward the Irken obsession with height. Now, I’m really ready to get some thought goo flowing all over and in the crevices of the matter of Irk’s power structure, and, perhaps the one social W that this marauding pack of space imperialists get to claim.
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Bearing no further ado, let’s talk about the Tallest. Can we talk about the Tallest? Please Mac, I’ve been dying to talk about the Tallest with you all day.
I’ve said once and now repeated twice that I think the canon implied that the homeworld of our favorite invaders is dummy thicc; consequentially, it’s left a lasting ripple on the evolution of their species as well.
Planetary gravity has a ton of invisible effects on the skeletons of large fauna, to the point where it’s the main thing that you, filthy Earth creature, can shake your own fist at it for taking a huge slice of the blame behind the prevalence of back pain in upright hominins. All that downward tug can really wear a spine down good over the years. In fact, would you believe that astronauts actually grow a smidge taller in Zero-G environments? Legit. So… use your brain and consider what we could have ended up looking like with our same bone structure, but many times that compression.
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You take that mental path, and suddenly, height outcomes may not seem like such an arbitrary measure of general survival fitness after all. Especially in the days before the Irkens represented an intergalactic super power. It may seem counterproductive in their modern intelligent society, but no doubt this aesthetic affinity is something that runs much deeper ingrained than practical programming. Respecting tallness is something Irk takes on dogmatic intuition- to the fault of barely being able to comprehend the notion of another species being both tall AND intellectually primitive.
Nevertheless, I pose that the connection may also be more than traditionalism, and not so vestigial after all. My reasoning suggests that The Almighty Tallest are in fact, not randomly born… they’re planned and made by the real overlords sitting atop the pyramid. And even so, they have existed in the species long, LONG before the PAK even did.
• Caste Polymorphism & Bug Stuff
The insectoid inspirations of Zim’s kin are something so obvious they really need no recapping, yet, I’m pining to make a more specific comparison. Some people like to go for wasps or bees, but if you ask me, the roving militarism of the armada is begging for the ant metaphor if anything.
And I got a hell of a species to whip out that you’ve probably never heard of.
A quick context breakdown- Polymorphism is another one of those long biology terms for a pretty simple concept: when one species has different distinct forms or types of forms that appear in its population. And it’s not talking about continuous spectrum differences like height alone. It’s talking about when animals/plants can have one gene with different possible phenotypical presentations. One good example (in humans no less) is the existence of different blood type groups. One of my absolute favorite cases, by the by, is in Side-Blotched Lizards. The females are samey and look pretty generic, but the males deadass come in 3 completely differentiated color variants, all of which are playing a perpetual game of rock paper scissors with the other two for breeding success.
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And this kind of phenomenon of course gets way less subtle in the insect world. Everyone here probably knows the simplified version of what a colony critter’s caste system looks like, with sterile female workers, breeding done males, and one big fat queen at the top, pumping out replacements for the other two. This is the part where I tell you it’s a hell of a lot more complicated, weird, and varied than that, actually.
Consider army ants, as I see them, the most Irk-ish of real world animals. Some fun facts on the most notorious handful of species below:
+ Nomadic by nature, they do not build any form of permanent hill or nest, and instead make temporary pit stops inbetween periods where the entire colony swarms along the forest floor in search of resources.
+ Army ants are aggressively predatory and forage in the style of legion-like “raids” that overwhelm their prey with sheer numbers and speed.
+ These raids often take shape by way of linear traffic columns that guide the direction of the swarm. This is because the ants have poor vision, relying on following the paths of the scent trails of the workers that are spearheading the legion.
+ Eciton burchellii, in particular, demonstrates a stark example of polymorphism by way of a rigid caste hierarchy. I.e., The non-reproductive colony members are divided into 4 sized tiers of worker. From smallest to largest there are minors, medias, porters (sub-majors), and soldiers (majors).
And let me tell you… the difference between the Soldier (major) caste and the rest of that batch is a pretty surprising gap.
This is what ONE major-type ant looks like hanging out with colony mates from the lower worker castes.
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Oh wait, getting ahead of myself. Ahem… sorry, I meant THIS is the image I was referring to:
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Not only is that obviously the bossiest bitch of the bunch, but she has some pretty cool features unique to her status… The more spidery looking body shape and those absolutely wicked mandibles being a standout.
You know what drop I already had coming, so I’ll cut to the chase.
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It’s clear that the Almighty Tallest are NOT the Irken equivalent of a hive queen. They are not drones, either. Besides the glaring fact that they are non-reproductive individuals, the role they serve in Irken society has very little if anything to do with running the day-to-day lives and functions of the larger population.
Instead, we have always seen them (and would have seen them more in the unmade episodes such as The Trial) involved more with the military front of the empire. Tallest Miyuki’s one known planned appearance would have featured her overseeing the military research happening on the Vortian base. Tallest Spork’s brief entrance (and exit) was planned to take place on Devastis, where he addressed those who were being evaluated to join the elite ranks of the armada. And our very own iconic duo have,
also,
never even once been seen on their home planet since their introduction. Their first appearance? Conventia. Ever since? Aboard the Massive, where they directly command and supervise the operations of the active invasions.
Why, the Almighty Tallest in all cases… these aren’t emperors at all, they’re generals! Sure, they have power, they have reverence, but even they must obey the final judgement of a Control brain at the end of the day. The same brains that grant them their status in the first place. Note, in real ants, the mechanics of how exactly any one egg is differentiated into its decided caste, from worker to queen, and all between, is… to say the very least, really fucking complicated. And all over the place. Broadly speaking, it’s a mix between genetic potential and nutrition during development. In some species this determination is near entirely up to the whims of DNA, and in others, it does come heavily down to how many protein shakes the colony decided to give their brood that day.
For the purposes of this hypothetical, I’m going to assume the people of Irk fall somewhere in between those two polar options. Now, being a futuristic network of coordinated supercomputers using cloning tech, the control brains have a more precise handle on the gene pool/diversity of their underlings than anything possible with natural breeding.
Let’s also assume they record and monitor the current population of each potential class of irken (they literally assign and code the PAKs’ occupational roles themselves). With each batch of smeets, they can predetermine certain percentages aside with the potential to fill whatever roles need replacing and expansion… keeping the genetic height markers attached for those downline to understand who should be looking down on who. Ergo, not ANY Irken can one day become the almighty tallest, but within each generation of smeets produced, there are potential candidates hidden among the upper ranks of would-be soldiers.
This way, the sudden death of the current armada commander would not disable current operations or throw the offensive lines into utter chaos for years on end. The Control brains need only select out the cream of the crop from their “proto-Tallest” and then cue their body (via diet or hormones) to switch the proper genes on, get a new growth spurt going, and complete the metamorphosis into their true potential.
As for why they seemed to break a historical precedent and jump for a two-for-one special in Zim’s generation… yeah, I’m not sure about that really. There could be a link between that and the very sudden death of the two previous tallests in a row, but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. It could just be a remarkable coincidence that Red and Purple were decided to be equally viable successors. Or, Operation Impending Doom could have been deemed an ambitious enough endeavor to warrant the appointing of two regents at once, given the scale of Irk’s expanded army for the purpose.
So, that’s it, then? The Irken species became so reliant of their technological advancement that they have casted aside and replaced every bit of their natural life cycle and order some
computer deemed inefficient? Substituted the seat of their leadership and even their ability to procreate with the soulless calculations of their AI programs?
:y Well, yes, but actually no.
• Long Live the Cyberocracy!
When I said in part one that Irk was on track to eventually make the jump from cyborg citizens to an entirely mechanical or digitized lifeform, I was doing a ponderous thinking thing. I was supposed to just be speculating, and then I find out the most mind blowing revelation while doing the research for this bad boy- those alien bastards already did it. The madlads/madlasses… So, living Irkens DO actually run the show around here, hiding in plain sight this whole time.
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I am still desperately searching for confirmation of the rumors I heard that Vasquez himself has said what I’m about to share, and I deeply appreciate anyone who can give me that as well. Even if this turns out to only be fanon, I’m still in love with this interpretation anyway: Within the Control Brains are the preserved consciousness of Irkens who have achieved this evolutionary end stage. WHO are they exactly is… honestly anyone’s guess. The important part being that they no longer have need of their meat suits to survive any longer and now exist as these hulks of nerve and metal.
Be this what it looks like to me, and it would be certain that this is actually the most coveted and honorary fate of any single Irken- immortalized and given a status on par with deification over the most powerful imperium the cosmos has ever known. Perhaps this was the path of particularly accomplished Tallests of the past, who had their paks integrated into the core of a fledgeling new control interface. What better way to commemorate those who have fallen in the highest level of glory? A single “brain” could in fact even be the summation of multiple beings, making example of the greatest the species has to offer and what all should be striving for. Conversely, the greatest punishment of their kind is the opposite- to be forever deceased, forever forgotten, forever excluded from this collective transcendence:
Damnatio Memoriae.
(But like… in a kids’ show)
There’s no clear estimate on how many control brains exist in the franchise, there are at least four that we have seen on screen, one on Devastis and the others within Judgementia. Probs safe to assume there’s at least one permanently built into the infrastructure of any planet of key enough importance to the Empire. Interestingly, lost scripts and show canon make numerous references to them still having gendered pronouns and voices when addressed individually.
Though, now that I think of it, that’s also really interesting that the same is true for the worker castes, too.
• Putting the “Trans” in Transirkenism 👉😎👉
When a worldbuild goes so far as to explicitly confirm a completely sexless, alien race of neuter cyborgs, the existence of a human-like gender binary starts to beg for some kind of explanation. You can’t just “suspension of disbelief” it aside the same as you can the fact that English is the most popular first language across the Galaxy.
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Oh, lookie, it’s one of my favorite things to think about when toying around with postbiological concepts/philosophy. I knew there were even more reasons transhumanism always seemed like such a cool sci-fi trope, from the endless possibilities in imagining the badass super powers, to the worlds of knowledge, and to the absolute social equalization that would all be unlocked in a cybernetic future. Well, that future is already comfortably in the hands of Irk, and whether intentionally or not, it has apparently brought them to the threshold of not just a postorganic, but also a post-gender society too.
A feminine and masculine variation does still exist in the form of small aesthetic differences- voice, antennae shape, pronoun usage, and eyelashes- but is now so far disconnected from the original associated sex roles that the distinction might as well be no more than a cosmetic preference. While “female” irkens are seen much, much more rarely than their counterparts, neither gender is treated differently from the other, and both have been spotted in occupations all the way up to invader elite and the Almighty Tallest.
This is a blending, of course, far beyond the insect-like caste system that itself did survive to the modern day, and that shows some truly impressive progress from what I imagine they were doing before.
Army ants, like all eusocial insects, are matriarchal; as in, where the females run the colony from top to bottom, while the males lead short runs of being mutilated by the workers, mating with the queen, and then dying shortly after.
In this headcannon narrative, it was almost certainly the male-associated gender Irkens who were liberated by the technological jump.
And that’s all sum purdy neat food for thought, huh ! ?
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gameshamus · 7 months
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(SPOILERS) Steve Wolfhard Confirmed PB and Marcelene in Adventure Time's Finale Intro
@gunterfan1992 and I were talking last night about our favorite show Adventure Time. I broke the news to him about Marcelene and PB's survival 1000+ following the events of "Come Along With Me."
A few years ago, I attended a twitch stream with Steve Wolfhard. I can recall the event very vividly. This was during the time of Distant Lands, quite a while before the episode Together Again aired. Steve was streaming his wife Leslie pickling vegetables. Leslie was on the right side of the screen at a counter with the pickling jars, one of which seemed to contain a carrot. The jars were of decent height but not dummy thicc. Steve was off camera some of the time especially when reading comments, but I got to see him enough to identify it was actually him and he answered the comments verbally.
I will spare the suspense and tell you that Marceline was confirmed to be the character in the intro in the brown parka and boots in the Ice Kingdom at that the pink hands gripping the ice bars were those of Princess Bubblegum's. Marcelene was in the Ice Kingdom to rescue PB. He also confirmed Patience St. Pim being in the egg and that Flame Princess and Slime Princess were both dead and had reincarnated into X and O who had been put into the intro to give closure to what happened to the fire and slime elementals. He said so basically Game Shamus, everyone is dead and then he laughed. He said everyone is dead except for Princess Bubblegum, Patience St. Pim, Sweet Pea, Gunter, and BMO. and maybe he mentioned the King of Ooo but I don't remember anymore, probably because I don't care about the king of Ooo. I primarily came because I wanted to know about Flame Princess.
Congratulations to the community on Bubbeline's relationship surviving well over 1000+ years!
I have quite a bit more information about other adventure time related stuff so just follow my blog if you want to keep updated.
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realjonahofficial · 1 month
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Ruminations on boss monster SOUL power transfer and aging
So, uh. That one bit of Gerson dialogue. What did he mean by this???
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Taken from Hushbugger's Undertale Dialogue Dump page on Github.
There are a few different headcanons/theories about how exactly this piece of lore should be interpreted – and, specifically, what its implications are regarding the children's growth rates in different scenarios. So, let's discuss it.
Personally, I'm REALLY not a big fan of the one that implies a boss monster whose parents die would be stuck as a child forever??? For instance, how would this theory of power transfer work with boss monster families that have 3+ children? Because like. Some couples having at least 3 children would be the only way for the population to to ever grow in size (unless we also headcanon that new boss monsters just spontaneously appear sometimes or something, which has absolutely no basis in canon lore). And by that logic, generations of this happening would eventually yield boss monsters who stop aging stupidly young. Not to mention, what about boss monster kids like Asriel, with no biological siblings? Would them getting both of their parents' SOUL power mean they go through super-puberty that turns them into double-mature adults??? So, yeah, not only would this all have pretty horrific implications regarding boss monster dating, but it'd also just be... really cursed worldbuilding that falls apart when you give it in any amount of serious thought. That's why I think it's a lot more likely that SOUL power transfer is simply that: a transfer of power.
I think Gerson's word choice is key here: "causing the child to grow" – rather than "mature", "age", or " develop" – "as the parents age" – as in, "into old age", becoming physically weaker due to giving up SOUL power.
I believe it's FAR more likely that, if a boss monster was orphaned, their growth would be stunted and their power would never reach its full potential – something more akin to malnutrition, rather than them literally being frozen in time; this would also happen, but to a lesser extent, to a boss monster who has to share their parents' SOUL power with more than one other sibling – and, inversely, a boss monster who's an only child would inherit both of their parents' power, growing far stronger than either of them separately by the time they become an adult.
This would also explain Asgore's absurdly high stats compared to Toriel's – like. ok. he has 8 times her total HP??? If we are to assume Asgore started out with similar stats to Toriel, plugging the numbers into the LV-based HP calculation formula the game uses for Frisk – 3/4 base HP + (1/4 base HP * LV) – gives us this equation: 330 + 110*LV = 3500. Solving for Asgore's hypothetical LV, then, gives us LV of roughly 29. Which might not sound that bad... until you realize the EXP required for getting to LV 19 is more than than all of the EXP it takes to get to LV 18 combined. Even assuming the EXP you get from killing just one human is equivalent to killing every monster in the Underground, while also assuming that the amount of EXP you need to level up no longer increases after you've reached LV 20 for some reason... it still wouldn't be enough to explain Asgore's dummy thicc HP bar after killing only 6 humans, if we are to assume his base HP is at all similar to that of Toriel. (Accounting for the possibility that monster history books lied, or at the very least didn't tell the full truth when stating that "not a single human SOUL was taken" during the war just leaves us with another problem: Toriel's also a veteran, and in fact seems a lot more comfortable with the idea of actively going to war as opposed to Asgore's approach of stalling for as long as possible, so if monsters actually were getting insane amounts of EXP by killing humans during the war, how come her stats are still so low? Killing even just a few humans would beef her up quite a bit; again, it's only once the numbers get higher that you see the sharp increase in EXP required to level up.)
I think Asgore was born into royalty, and Toriel married into it. Again: if a pair of boss monsters had only one child, that child would have the combined power of their 2 parents – now, let's suppose a family decided to do that for many generations.... with each new kid in such a family, the base power of the resulting offspring would grow more and more and more, wouldn't it? Perhaps one such family also has the means and prestige that allows them to easily find suitably strong partners for their kids, further increasing the rate at which the family's power would grow. (Also, the idea of Toriel originally being a commoner is further reinforced by the fact that the surname "Dreemurr" is confirmed to come from Asgore's side and, at least as far as we know, Toriel just... doesn't have her her own surname, as she switches to just going by "Toriel" after the two break up. Given that we only have about 3 examples of surnames within the Entirety Of The Underground, it appears that family names just aren't really a thing used within monster society, unless said family is really notable in some way).
...I may or may not be overthinking boss monster biology.
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kitochiart · 6 months
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My guy Ashyrok !!! He is a typical grumpy bounty hunter. These drawings are ooooooold but i likeit still. He has a loth cat sticker on his chest plate that was stuck on by a kid he met during a mission :)) he decided to keep it as he is a loser and a big softie inside
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He is also a wife guy and loves her wife (i never named her... rip) but their relationship started rocky as she is sassy and quips right back for anything. But Ashyrok needed a mechanic badly so his only choice was to take all her sass quietly.. Later on they grew to like each other... a lot... After that they got married and Ashyrok retired from the bounty hunter business and became a (dummy thicc) malewife 😔😔 They will have 3 kids later on too hehe. i also forgot to mention his wife is an umbaran so i guess i will put it here :")
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dexpairs-blog · 1 year
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Characters i think i would i be able to pull as a plus size(small fat) fem presenting enby that manages to be somewhat conventionally attractive 👍🏻
I use all pronouns btw
Warnings: none?? Maybe some suggestive comments here and there but that's it.
Riddle: yes because of his mommy issues but i wouldn't because of his momma, but i would gladly call her a bitch to defend him.
Trey: maybe? I feel like he might have a preference for chubbier bodies so probably?? Even tho i wouldn't be able to tell he's flirting cuz i suck at social cues LMAO
Cater: no but would still flirt with me as a joke, with consent ofc! He'd drop the most down bad statements in my magicam comment section just for shits and giggles just to be answered with an equally down bad comment. Me n Cater 🤞🏻
Ace: yes- you saw how he kept mentioning wanting to share a bad with the MC? Bros down astronomical. But i wouldn't bother cuz eh- i need an adhd bestie to share my braincells with yk. he'd prolly get touchy but my dumb ass would think nothing of it.
Deuce: yes. Bro gets nervous around the maidens so yep.
Leona: yes and no?? Like, i feel like i could pull him but for nothing serious? Even if i manage to make him my bf it wouldn't be anything long term, cause you know, he's a prince, it would still be a nice relationship tho. He'd also use me as a pillow which depending on where u are can be a blessing or a pain cuz lemme tell you i'm a walking heater.
Ruggie: YES. Bro looks at fat women and goes AWOOGA. You can't tell me he doesn't find plus size attractive knowing wtf he's been through. He LOVES a well fed mc!! And loves being the little spoon!!
Jack: no because he'd friendzone me😤 not that he doesn't find plus size ppl hot but i don't think we'd get along like that.
Azul: yes and no, he most likely has internalized fatphobia due to his trauma, and he gets pissed seeing how the MC manages to draw ppl towards them if the fat. He'd project a lot pre ch.3 but after that he gets over it and learns to over come it.
Jade:yes but more like the other way around.
Floyd: yes. Bro wouldn't keep his hands to himself.
Kalim: yes, he doesn't care about looks.
Jamil: NOPE.
Vil: LMAFAO NO
Rook: anyone can pull him
Epel: yea
Idia: yup, dummy thicc with big tiddums go brrr
Malleus: all yuus can pull him, but again it wouldn't be something long term cuz he's a prince and i don't want to get married😍 so better to remain homies 👍🏻
Lilia: bro adopts me the second he hears me saying one of his sons is hot and acts as a wingman for me. Mans wants grandbabies.
Silver: YES, IT WOULD TAKE ME MONTHS TO DO SO BUT IT WOULD BE SO WORTH IT. HUSBAND MATERIAL RIGHT THERE💞💞
Sebek: yea?? But i wouldnt try for the safety of my eardrumms.
I FORGOT RSA AND ROLLO
Honorable mentions:
(mildly suggestive)
Rollo (pastofrollo) : YES, CONSERVATIVE BITCH TURNED INTO MEGA SLUT🤤🤤🤤 I WANT HIM SO BAD YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW. I WANT TO RUIN HIM GHHNRHNSHSM..A.S.S.,.,.,.,.MBMHJNM...
Chenya: maybe?? More like a fwb situation though.
Neige: as much as i'd like to say yes his fans would bodyshame me into oblivion😭😭
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morning-sun-brah · 1 year
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Hey I'm backkk! Sorry for spamming your notifications recently but I just having so much serotine rn lol
since you updated Thicc thighs and lapis was mentioned I wanted to draw what I imagine her as well! ^^
Idk why but I've kinda imagine her being Asian American. A bit lanky, petite yet tall for a women (like 5'8), anyways I hope you like it and can't wait to read more for you^^ much love 💙💙💙
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FIRST OF ALL PLEASE SPAM ME UNTIL THE HEAT DEATH OF THE UNIVERSE I LOVE IT. (I was planning on responding to the other one I just got distracted sob)
ahem.
Also...
ARE YOU KIDDING ME???? SHE'S BEAUTIFUL??!!! THIS IS EXACTLY HOW I PICTURED HER??????!!!
You can't keep getting away with this, this is so wonderful. And look at Leo's dumb little face. What a moron I love him.
Omfg I love you. I love her. Oh Lapis, you silly fool. You're too pretty to wait that long, I'm so sorry Leo is a dummy.
I can't believe you made art again. I am so flattered I could scream. Someone tattoo this to the inside of my eyelids.
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polyklok · 1 year
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Next up on my list in all of our favorite Swedish fish-
Skwisgarr Skwigelf, physique/appearance headcanons
Nathan
Pickles
Toki
Murderface
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It took me like four tries to spell his name wtf
26 years old. Why? Idk, he just has those vibes. 26 year old vibes.
6’7, though he usually wears boots that puts him at, like, 6’10. It’s absolutely ridiculous how tall this guy is. Insulting, even.
We all know the line ‘Skwisgarr Skwigelf, taller than a tree.’ Right?
More like a beanstalk cause this motherfucker is like 140 lbs. That’s not too low, but it is when you’re nearly 7 feet tall!
Growing up, he was gangly as hell, and had some seriously clumsy habits. But he grew out of it, and is now very graceful. It’s one of the ways he’s very attractive, even his simplest movements seem sort of like a dance.
I added pointy ears because him with lil elf ears is just so funny to me. Let’s just say he hides them in his hair or something.
Speaking of his hair- FUCKING GORGEOUS
Seriously, he’s got long, straight locks that might very be made out of gold. He has an extensive hair routine using only the most high-quality of products. Usually, he spends an hour a day on his hair alone.
That being said, he will not hesitate to smack anyone who tries to touch it. Strangers or otherwise.
He also takes pretty good care of the rest of himself as well. He’s the only member of the band without any obvious wrinkles, only paper-cutting cheekbones.
His pale skin is actually fairly scarred. Some are from fights, some are from mentioned childhood clumsiness, most are from sexual endeavors that got too out of hand.
Piercing blue eyes that could probably kill a man. He has many different glares. You know in Zoolander where they talk about, like, facial expressions? The Dethklok fans do that with Skwisgarr’s many different glares.
He does the old school trick of putting Vaseline on his eyelids so they shine more. Also wears mascara. He wouldn’t tell a soul, though.
Dummy thicc lips. I said what I said.
At some point during his early twenties, he began dying his eyebrows cause he was sick of people not being to tell he was pissed at them.
How do I say this…uhh, absolutely no ass. His hips naturally thirst foreword when he’s in a relaxed position to compensate for his supreme lack of ass. Long back.
Always moving. Usually, it’s picking at his guitar. But if he doesn’t have access for whatever reason, he’s pacing or fidgeting, or grinding his teeth even. He can’t ever not be moving, it frustrates him.
His hands alone are worth millions of dollars, so he takes extra precaution to make sure their in top shape. Trims his nails regularly, applies hand sanitizer and lotion at least 10 times a day, won’t paint his nails or even wear rings just in case.
But he does like jewelry. Actually, he mostly likes collecting expensive pieces and not ever wearing them. He just wears whatever hot topic sends him for free.
He doesn’t really like wearing what he wears at all. He prefers form-fitting, plain, white clothing. But that doesn’t match the band’s aesthetic, so he settles.
All his clothes are still perfectly tailored, though. Never too loose, never too tight.
Despite not completely wearing his preferred style, he’s still aware that he looks good in pretty much everything and anything, so he wears it with enough confidence to make it seem couture.
Similar to Nathan (not exactly), he also shaves himself, the whole body. Except he hardly grows any body or facial hair. But as soon as one does show up, it’s gone.
He smells…clean. Obsessively clean. Like hand sanitizer, mint, and maybe pine or citrus, depending on his cologne. It’s a little off-putting but certainly not unpalatable.
Overall, definitely puts the most into his appearance and hygiene than the other boys. And it’s worth it, clearly.
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duhragonball · 1 year
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Dragon Ball Super 054
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“Father!  I have to fight Goku Black, but I’m dummy thicc, and the clap of my asschecks keeps telegraphing my move!”
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Mai and Shu see Trunks image training to prepare for his showdown with Goku Black.  Shu has to explain the concept to her, and then Mai starts trying to do the same idea, except she imagines herself getting kissed by Trunks.  I’m pretty sure that’s just daydreaming.
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In the lab, Pilaf starts screwing around with a computer program Bulma left open, and she gets all mad at him for messing with her stuff, but then she reads his code and decides it’s actually an improvement.  So Pilaf is good at coding, fine, but the punch line here is that Pilaf actually managed to make himself useful, which sort of underscores how pointless he’s been in every other episode of this arc.
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Beerus, Goku, and Whis return from Universe 10, and share their findings with Trunks over breakfast.  Trunks is frustrated, because it sounds like they didn’t learn anything conclusive, but Beerus points out that Zamasu might become involved with Goku Black in the future.  While Beerus and Goku squabble over a plate of sausage and eggs, Trunks reflects on the fact that Goku has fought the gods themselves and lived to tell about it.  So maybe it doesn’t matter how strong Trunks gets.   If Goku and Vegeta go with him to fight Goku Black, then they’re sure to win.
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But there’s one grumpy gus who seems to know exactly what Trunks is thinking...
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Back in U10, Gowasu is observing a primitive species on Planet Barbari, and Zamasu sees this as further evidence that mortals are self-destructive brutes who don’t deserve to exist.  Gowasu insists that they can grow and change, but Zamasu doesn’t think it’s worth waiting around to find out.  So Gowasu goes and fetches his Time Ring to take a peek.
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To Zamasu’s point, it seems like all the Barbari do is beat the shit out of each other, but Gowasu wants to see what they’re like after a thousand years, and that’s what the Time Ring is for.  Only Supreme Kais are allowed to use them, and they can only take the wearer into the future, and back again.  They cannot take someone into the past, since this is forbidden, even for Kaioshin.
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But Gowasu wants Zamasu to see this too, which means he has to give him one of his special Potara earrings, so the Time Ring will accept him as an authorized user.  In effect, he’s temporarily promoting him to co-Supreme Kai, which is... a horrible mistake, actually. 
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So they go to the future, and it turns out that after 1000 years, the Barbari have learned to build fires and shelters, and they even have primitive tools.  Not bad at all.
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They also... still beat the crap out of each other for no good reason, which proves Zamasu’s point.  The technology may change, but the fundamental problem he sees with mortals remains the same. 
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While explaining the Time Rings to Zamasu, Gowasu mentions that the four green rings in the case were created when someone caused an alternate timeline to be formed.  He is deeply dismayed to see four of these in the box, although he shows no interest in finding how how this happened or doing anything about it. 
For trivia’s sake, I think we can assign three of those green rings to the timelines shown or implied in Dragon Ball Z.  One is the future shown in “History of Trunks”, one is the world Cell came from, and one is an alternate history which Trunks saved from the androids, but there was no Cell involved.  I wrote a thing about this last year, if you’re interested.  That fourth green ring might represent the second trip Trunks made into the past, when he showed up during the Piccolo/Android 20 fight, but I’m not so sure of that.  Anyway, we’ll follow up on this later.
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Meanwhile, Vegeta challenges Trunks to a fight, and shows him Super Saiyan Blue for the first time.  Trunks quickly realizes that this must represent Goku’s full power as well, and if both of them are this strong, then they can defeat Goku Black without any trouble.  But this upsets Vegeta, who demands that Trunks get stronger for his own sake.  Is defeating Black his only goal?  What about he next threat?  And if nothing else, Trunks ought to strive for greater strength to satisfy his Saiyan pride.  So Vegeta tells him he’ll call Trunks the winner if he can land a single blow on him.
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Trunks almost pulls it off by using his old bulky form, the one he used to fight Cell and it didn’t work at all.  Vegeta mocks him for this, but it turns out it’s just a diversion to get Vegeta to lower his guard.
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Vegeta gives him some credit for resourcefulness, but it won’t get the job done. 
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Goku senses their battle and brings Bulma out to watch.  He seems very excited about her getting to see this, even though she doesn’t understand it.  It’s like a big sentimental moment among their family, and Goku wants her to be part of it, even if she’s confused. 
See, this is why I can’t buy into the idea that Goku doesn’t love his own wife and children the way Earthlings do.  He understands Vegeta’s family just fine here, so how could he not view his own family the same way?
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Anyway, Vegeta gets distracted by the spectators, and Trunks siezes the opportunity to headbutt Vegeta while he’s not looking.  Trunks declares that a win.
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Vegeta doesn’t take Trunks’ hand, but he does seem satisfied that Trunks has gotten the message.  Trunks assures him that he’ll keep training to surpass himself, Goku Black, and Vegeta.  Basically it’s the Super Saiyan Cabba episode all over again, except Trunks gets it.
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Meanwhile, Beerus and Whis have returned to Beerus’ planet, when they get a call from Grand Zeno.  Zeno wants to speak with Goku.
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Yeah, I’d be upset too if I found out this saga was about to take another detour.
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sindumpster · 1 year
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Did you ever get that ask about your cats Wiggs? I sent one like a month ago and i think tumblr might've ate it- i was just asking how they were if you still have em lol
I’m not sure if I did? At least not seeing anything recent about cats and I only get a couple asks a month lol
But they’re all good and still around. The number of cats we got hasn’t changed since we got the scary sisters (Princess Crybaby and Dog).
Dog doesn’t act much like a dog anymore (she doesn’t act like a cat either), so she’s in renaming limbo for me lol. Lately I’ve been calling her “Scull-bait”. Her actual name is Scully so it’s not very creative lol
She likes to perch on high places so maybe she is a bird now. Idk. She also doesn’t like having her picture taken so I don’t have many pics of her lol
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Crybaby has a bajillion other names but I’ve been calling her “Miss/Princess Buttcheeks” more. Cuz she has somehow developed defined butt cheeks and nobody believes us when we mention this disturbing revelation. But I also feel weird taking pics of her ass as evidence. I don’t know how she managed to do this. She is dummy thicc tho and we’re trying to make her less thicc. She is also the source of all drama. Still very evil, and makes this pose all the time.
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FluffNugget is the same. Still very no thoughts head empty but she is also the queen. Still plays with water and expects everything to be just so. She is still figuring out how to meow and all the other cat things, but she’s gotten better at them. Mostly.
Occasionally Buttcheeks tries to challenge her claim to the throne. But she’s a coward, so all Fluff has to do is glare and Buttcheeks will run away.
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katyspersonal · 2 years
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patches + 0!
(Asks from this ( x ) meme)
0) All numbers in the list!
Oh boy... You just straight up decided to kill me with this one 👀 To be honest I often find myself to be scared to even think deeper into this particular character, like
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/srs though, he has the exact aura of 'character who becomes Tumblr sexyman' fdgfdgdfgdf
I will be speaking about his Bloodborne version specifically though. Patches the Spider. As it is the one most familiar to me and 95% of everything I post is Bloodborne related, so.
1) What would their social media page/activity be like
I already mentioned this somewhere, but we all know and agree he'd have shady account with 0 personal information that he'd send malicious links from. xd
Maybe he would also sell all the private information he could obtain from accounts he hacked this way. As a treat. However you'd need to be a very dumb/naive person to click on a link he sends because, again, we all know and agree that his method to talk you into clicking it would painfully obviously give him away.
2) What animal they remind me of
Okay I am NOT to count spider on this one, him being a spider in Bloodborne is lore-justified and other Nightmare Apostles are just the same (majority lacks human heads though). As for an animal that has to do with his identity specifically, I can't help but think of a raccoon. Nothing to do with his appearance, but raccoon is the most notorious 'cunning animal that steals shit and is an asshole but sorta adorable' so I just can't help but feel this is his vibe. (Or maybe I just think he belongs to a trash can, hehehe. /j )
3) My thoughts on their design/aesthetic alone
I reeeeeally love Bloodborne design for him. I overall love spiders, especially fluffy ones, so this design is just created to cater for my tastes specifically.
At first I was not sure whether to be happy or upset that Bloodborne version of him did not get his trademark sassy smirk that makes you want to punch his face before he even said anything, but tbh I've grown to like his more serious aesthetic in Bloodborne down to little details. He is just... very 'advanced' compared to his counterparts in other games despite saving his personality, he doesn't just survive but pursues Eldrich Truth so having this sort of 'I've seen some shit and continue seeing new one every minute with my eyes on the inside' look is just more endearing in a way. More inviting.
4) Physical headcanons (sleeping habits, favourite food, all that)
It is a no-brainer but for the starters, absolutely he is capable of making spider webs like this, however he doesn't need to catch any food. He just doesn't need nourishment anymore as his body is perfectly adapted for existing within Nightmare realm, according to Miyazaki he turned into a monster from much Insight, he is a cursed equivalent of a Kin! The only food he needs anymore is more Insight xD However, not needing food doesn't mean he can't eat. I think he will still gladly squash and eat blue slugs and other 'cosmic' phantasms, as some form of asserting dominance as cursed, demonic Kin before cosmic cutesy goodie-goodie creatures.
Patches could always see and hear through Rom's concealment just alright as well, he sees as much as an average Amygdala. And I concluded from how he is encountered at a random house after Amelia is killed + how he is a merchant in the dungeons that he can travel between Nightmare and 'reality' easily. It is not even limited to reflective surfaces like with Micolash; Patches simply moves between cracks of realms that he can see. Rom is supposed to have the ability too but she is a dummy thicc and only uses natural 'teleporting' of Spiders to move barely few meters forward :pensive:
He has grown a bit bad at perceiving more 'normal' things though - Hunter being able to creep up at Patches is not even the final form of it. At this rate Patches is just too used to seeing and hearing exclusively otherwordly things, so unless he deliberately focuses or expects you to do something harmful against him - it is extremely easy to catch him off guard. You can outright put a gun right to his head and if he doesn't expect you to harm him - he won't notice it with his side vision at all, nor he will hear it clicking. Just too stuck up with the voices of Great Ones to perceive things from just a normie human effectively.
5) Social headcanons (what do they think of their friends/allies if they have any, what are they looking for in relationship, what people tend to think about them…)
He doesn't get attached to people and it's been like this for a long time now, however when he was able to feel attached he would still never leave himself open. Like in any other realm, I believe Patches is not his real name but a pseudonym he permanently adopted. Giving someone your name means to give them your identity, and so far not a single new soul learned his real name! He would not want to give it even if he was to genuinely fall in love with someone, however if you are somehow to learn his name anyway, he'll make sure it 'doesn't mean anything'.
At this point in time, his ideal relationship is to simp for whoever is the current God that is useful for him xD He distanced from attraction to someone equal (?) very far. Patches always had ability to take just a glance at someone to get them all figured but it became only "worse" with his enlightenment so... what is the point to form very deep bonds with humans (and pthumerians) anymore? He is cynical about 99% of the people, his favouritism starts and ends at not giving genuinely kind and generous people to Amygdala. A bit hypocritical to be so picky considering he himself is full of vice but that's what we love/hate him for xd
Back when he still walked on his two he used to be very flirty, mostly with pretty women, but again never thought of seeking big trusting love. Most people are too morally depraved even if they hide it well, but truly good people he would not want to ruin with his bad touch! Most girls found him annoying at first but could not help it and crawled back if he'd stop with his teasing (if you are charismatic then you are charismatic lol).
He had attracted some people in his life that tried to get under his skin and break through his "tsundere" shell, to decide for him what he 'really' needed and analyse him, all of which he ditched by leaving them to die somewhere in the pit and all of which he'd still be angry at if he even remembered them anymore in his new life as a Spider. Not because they were entitled 'I can fix him' losers, or course... But because even the dumbest ones of them were right about him. However he is too stubborn, it is and has always been too much favour for anyone to have that sort of 'control' over him.
I do think his disdain for clerics used to be as present in Bloodborne verse as in any other, it is just that at this rate he learned so much about humanity and the world that there is no point to give them special honour. Nonetheless the specified distaste from his end had evolved into specifically looking down on stars-worshipping researchers like Choir, Ebrietas is pretty much the opposite of Amygdalas.
6) Psychological headcanons (tastes, fears, talents, regrets, how they deal with anger, just anything that comes to mind on the topic)
One of the things Patches kept despite 'advancing' is holding petty grudges, he could pout at as much as you making him feel guilty when he 101% deserves it! Remember that he doesn't sell to you or gives you a rune if you refuse to take his attempt to sacrifice you lightly. He knows he is not perfect, he knows as long as his identity still persists through Arcane enlightenment he is as bad as people he looks down on, yes. But if you make Patches feel bad about it, he will make sure it becomes your problem and your fault. xd If he learned to deal with secret guilt and wounded pride maturely that just would no longer be him... so, passive aggression ftw.
It is probably self-explanatory that he is prone to double standards and hypocrisy, just see him in just one game and it's transparent. When someone calls him out on it, depending on how attractive they are in his eyes he will either try to flirt his way out of the conversation or just throw salty 'no, u' spirited accusation and never be seen again. It is honestly just easier to let him be in control if you want to stick around for friendship/flirting/whatever, for anyone that ever tried to "change" him his stubbornness appeared to be so insanity-inducing that Frenzy is barely a status effect in comparison!
He early developed very unsettingly easy attitude to death and loss of dear people, even before Yharnam crashed and burned. He would still ensure fate worse than death if someone was to kill his friend, sure, but the loss itself he gets over with quite lightly. Perhaps it is just the ability to remember and appreciate the good memories if the person was worth it.
As a human he used to have quite a temper when things were not going his way. As a Spider though, he abandoned active aggression altogether, sense of being superior by how much he learned and who his friends are (Cthulhu moms) fixes up plenty of cracks in the ego, you feel?
His regrets almost exclusively have to do with not having spent enough time with some people while it still mattered - especially his mother whom he hasn't seen ever since he left in the Amygdalae cult. He wanted to check on her from time to time but every time he was stopped by realising just how huge is the rift between them now. When his friends would ask him if he talked to her like he wanted, naturally, he'd cheerfully lie about having had a great chat and catching up with the news and having no hard feelings.
His tastes in people, more often women, are either very shy easily flustered temperament ones, or extremely strong and big and confident unattainable menacing people that will wipe the floor with him, no in-between. He gets awkward and bails in emotionally hard moments though because to comfort someone he'd need to open his own heart, and that's a no-no! He will claim that "emotional swing has ruined the mood" and that he "did not know he'd pick a crybaby" however that's not what he genuinely thinks. In actuality he'd feel disgusted with himself but... Yeah he is the type to allow insecurities he refuses to address to turn into spikes that wound others.
Okay, I feel like at this rate he is becoming more sad than he is supposed to be so let's move onto next question already!
8) Made-up connections with other characters that weren’t in the canon (friends, enemies, whatever)
Upon doing this response I realised that it’d made more sense to place connections as 7 and ships as 8 instead because one can explain another, depending on the amount of context! But I was not prepared for getting both 7 and 8 in any way, hehe. So I’ll just break the row and go with 8 first!
Rom - Patches was probably the one assisting Rom’s initiation with Nightmare Apostles. They would get along pretty well still, however Patches would need to overcome initial uneasiness with her as she sees through every prank attempts from him by sheer intuition. However they were interacting even before. He is pleasantly surprised as Rom gets the courage to delve into more cursed knowledge, ‘forbidden by stars’, but feels respect he is even willing to admit when turns out she is doing this not only out of blind trust to her brother’s (Micolash’s) crazy ascension plan, but out of true curiosity, too. Until this point Patches has been falsely presuming she was just a friendly pushover blinded by admiration with Micolash, so he has a soft spot in his heart for her as one of very few people he failed to get all figured. Even softer spot when Rom proceeds evolving in GO form and grows 16 legs, as opposed to regular Nightmare Apostle’s 12, though at this rate not even other Great Ones can comprehend what she’s thinking.
Micolash - The sibling Patches sees more often than Rom, especially after Micolash occupies Yahar’gul for good and shows determination to peer deeper into lost knowledge of Pthumerians of Pthumeru Ihyll. Bloodborne is complicated, such is Patches’ situation with clerics in it; whereas Choir and School of Mensis are part of the Healing Church, they are isolated societies pursuing ascension and knowledge rather than greed and vain, insane ambitions. Patches can respect this, as bitter as he is for having to thank a Church boy for helping to restore communication with Amygdalas. They have strained relationship though. Patches is scared of Micolash as he is just as cunning and twisted as himself but with added layer of insanity. Resents him because he has much more authority and charisma over other Nightmare Apostles. But also he respects sincerity of his pursuit. And he loves gossiping and joking with Micolash very much whenever they find a person they both hate. They still chat sometimes in Nightmare of Mensis however Patches’ interest had lessened a lot when Micolash turned back to Kos. We’ve been there already! If your God is not answering to you, seek another one or work your own way up! Where did all that self-respect and confidence suddenly go?
Lonely Old Dear (Irma) - With my love for using cut concepts, of course I’d grab and use the cut idea of Patches being her child! The last person currently present that remembers his soft side and knows his secrets. She remembers him early developing a habit of concealing his tears and making a happier face before the mirror, not willing to show his vulnerability and troubles with his father, and she’s proud of him for that. Irma never insisted that he should share his pain and ease himself, presuming he will seek her advice when he needs it on his own. ...But, past some point, it stopped happening. At all. And then he distanced altogether for his weird Pthumerian-leaning cult. He did not see her as one mentally prepared for what he discovered and wished no harm on her, however just talking to her would have done much more for her mental health than leaving her in the dark on where did he go and what he’s doing, really.
Chester - I still like to draw connection between Dark Souls and Bloodborne (not as in ‘they’re same universe’ but as in ‘they’re different universes but from time to time they intersect, usually it is fault of Great Ones’) and you maybe noticed his aesthetic is different, his movements are agility-based like hunter’s and his dialogue might sound like and Amygdala snatched him and teleported him from Yharnam! Well, but they already had a strange friendship since Yharnam. They shared love for trolling people and sometimes would butt heads on their approach (Patches is sleazy and Chester is more direct!), or if they have accidentally selected the same person to ambush (that one comedy trope where while two idiots argue, the idiot they were against quietly sidewalks away xd). However, Chester defended Patches for many times as someone who has actual Hunter skills.
I see both of these characters as the type to hate anyone who is too similar to them, so it is their differences (that reach point of fighting sometimes) that keep either of them from backstabbing another. They also give each other advices on how to charm ladies better - and to the surprise of absolutely fucking no one, advices from one fail the other terribly. This friendship is full of conflicts, but ‘healthy’ ones that end as easily as they started. Patches did, in fact, had to witness Amygdala snatch him... But like I said, his ability to overcome grief is disturbingly good - besides deep down he was prepared for a hunter of all people to die young. It happened when Patches was already ears deep in his weird cult and he could accept. However he never learned that what Amygdala did try to do was splitting Chester across universes so every version of Patches would have a version of him by the side. Unfortunately it did not work as not even Amygdala yet comprehended specifics of Patches’ ‘anomaly’, so all that happened was just moving him elsewhere. I question if Patches would have been way more upset at the Paleblood Hunter for killing this specific Amygdala if he knew how much she cared for his practically friendless ass in her own weird way lol
Vicars - ‘Normie’ Healing Church that is after Blood Ministration, not Eyes on the inside, is naturally hated by Patches, however they’d rarely interact directly. He thinks Laurence was a fool but one with good heart, he misses him, especially after Ashton, his (extremely cringy and depraved) confidant that ruined the remains of institution’s decency. He and Micolash used to mock Ashton at every chance they’d get, verbally or practically. By the point Norbert drops by, Patches is too entranced by Nightmare and Eldrich Truth to even bother, however around Amelia’s time he’d started feeling nostalgic and checking on the waking world for more than just seeking new victims. There is something about the way Amelia fell into despair upon realising nature of institution she was roped into since young age, something about the way she quit wearing Church’s sigil, something about the way she never prepared a successor, something about the way she sees Laurence as the only one who ‘understood’, something about the way she killed clerics that kept brainwashing her that keeps Patches from hating her entirely... He is not even sure what. But he sometimes gives her useful advices, without being seen. She just accepts him as a strange unseen friend.
7) Ship(s) with them that I like or at least consider
Well, since I already went on tangent about what amazing, sensitive and emotionally mature partner he'd indeed make (/s /s /s), needless to mention that ships with him would be moreso playful and not go too deep - for the sake of both his partner and himself.
I like to think about him and Rom sometimes, this might have easily been a fleeting thing in the past. My Rom falls for comedic trope of the naive, oblivious, sweet character that constantly sees through plans and bullshit on pure accident so she'd upset him as impossible to prank person. However she is also all so relaxing and cute and giggles at the slightest compliment! She is convenient for Patches if anything - able to understand him well but not trying to "fix" him, taking his flaws easy but not being just a mindless pushover. She'd give him fun and relaxation he lacks, and he'd keep her permanently excited to not roll into laziness and despair. Besides they ended with the same ‘religion’.
And I guess I sorta did make a solid connection between him and Chester? I just like to think sometimes, of them being that sort of friends that endured many sorts of failures and bitter experiences in attempts to get relationships... that they realised they were all they needed all along. xd Feels more like a close friendship with added intimacy than something super big but it might be enough. However, since they are both concealing their real names (who names their kid Chester? /j /j /j just a headcanon), they’re equal here and if they ever decided to reveal their real names to anyone, that’d be each other!
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sksdgfds no, seriously, I do not have much shippy thoughts about him due to comic-relief-concealed Hell I envision his character as. I am however always here for any sort of just happy, chill kissy-cuddly moments with him and any character! I just do not have a ship I'd feel strongly about, let alone an 'OTP', but he can still get some affection sometimes ok!
9) Headcanons about their past
- He last seen his father when he was very little, however from Irma’s line when Paleblood Hunter kills her, I presume the guy was rather aggressive and abusive - whether on his own or from the Hunt getting to him. Or maybe he ended up perceiving what he was only yet to understand? Me and @val-of-the-north​ speculate his father had to be from Pthumerian line - explaining Patches’ bleach white skin in this setting, presence in the dungeons and increased interest to the Arcane. Nonetheless, although he can’t remember his father’s name, the face and the name, the scar remained; Patches was a gloomy and sad kid for only a bit, and then developed a habit of taking everything easy as he realised that “nobody liked a crybaby”.
- Had a rather nice settlement with other Amygdala fanatics in Yahar’gul until Healing Church had gotten there eventually as well. It was only a matter of time since they were occupying everything. It was quite a struggle as for “mysterious reasons” any and all attempts of the Church to settle properly kept being sabotaged. Clerics even started to claim the place had to be too cursed even for them xD That was, until Micolash took matters in his hands and offered the thing they could not refuse - an effective way to communicate with Amygdalas! Patches is forever bitter for having to thank who counts as Healing Church personnel nonetheless, but it quickly turned obvious Micolash was a “cleric” in name only and he was someone worth sticking around with.
- My current idea about anomaly with a version of him present across different timelines is that his Bloodborne incarnation is the progenitor. Some characters like Queen Yharnam and Rom are known to have at least two bodies - one in Nightmare, another in the waking world, guaranteeing their technical immortality. I think Patches was attempting to do the same - and a mirror is a crucial element in this ‘splitting’ ritual. Unfortunately, his ritual got interrupted with mirror scattering when he was still reflected by it! That guaranteed not a split between ether and physical, but instead him fracturing as a concept, but a timeline can’t have more than one of the same person to avoid paradox... So it solved its own problem and ‘dispersed’ him, guaranteeing Patches’ birth and roughly similar fate and personality across every nearby timeline! Thankfully, he at least still did accomplish immortality - when we ‘kill’ him, he is still present, just avoids us.
- I very badly wanted to say that he should have been one of Byrgenwerth scholars! But it has underwater rocks, such as how initially Byrgenwerth and Healing Church were inseparable. But... it used to be an institution of history and archaeology even prior that, right? So I think he did manage to get in there, being amongst very first students such as Caryll and Laurence! But as soon as they attempted to create a corrupt system that would eventually wreck this town? He just never showed up for the class ever again. Somehow he just knew, and he knew right, and in just few years ‘Healing Church’ started to feel like hostile aliens for him and not fellow scholars from Byrgenwerth that picked a different part. But now that Byrgenwerth is stuck between Nightmare and ‘reality’ and is immortalised (save for slime scholars and nosy Choir staff showing from time to time), he can delve in his nostalgia and just stay here for most of the time. This area just feels cosy, brings back good memories.
10) Content about them I’d like to see more of
Not to be that one guy, but... just any content of this particular incarnation of Patches would do. xD It feels like most people just see this version of him as a shitpost, however, Nightmare Apostles (the spider people) are a very real and solid lore hint as silly as they look!
Thank you so much for asking though!
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dunkalfredo · 5 years
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happy pride it's me in the universe where my body wasn't smited by god himself
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adobe-outdesign · 3 years
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Are you still doing pokemon reviews? How about my boys Audino and Indeedee?
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There's something irresistibly adorable about Audino; maybe it's just that it's such a sweet and gentle Pokemon. Either way, if I saw one of these out in the wild I would absolutely hug it. Concept-wise, I also really like that its ears basically function as stethoscopes, which is a neat idea.
Design-wise it's also really good, being another more abstract mons with some really unique shapes to it. I love the shape of the ears, and the markings are quite pretty, as are the more animal-like eyes.
My only nitpicks are that the arms are too long; it's subtle, but it does through off its shape a bit, not helped by how wide the bottom of the body is compared to the top. The straight line diving the hand markings is a little odd, and the all-white tail is bothersome as it's the only white part of the design (it really should have been cream).
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And then someone at Gamefreak was like "yeah I got u" and fixed literally every problem I had with the original with its mega. The arms are now much shorter and the body rounder, making its proportions much more even. The hands have been given a more wavy division, and the all-white tail now matches the body (I kind of liked the contrast of the pink, but all-white is fine seeing as it helps differentiate the two forms; though a lighter pale pink with the white might've worked as well).
Even better, it improves on things even further by allowing the markings on the side to go outside of the body, perking up the ears and giving them a gorgeous swirly shape and pattern (I'm just a big fan of swirls in designs tbh), complimenting the swirls with a second set on the neck, and even giving it little magical-girl style "boots".
If I have a single nitpick, I would've liked to see the puff on the chest either removed (as it's not really needed), or turned upside-down. The design flows downward but the puff goes upward, so it should flip 180 degrees. This would also prevent the top from cutting into the face. But other than that, I really dig this design.
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I have a conspiracy theory that the (female) Indeedee design was meant to be a regional variant of Audino before it got changed. In addition to a somewhat similar body shape and markings, the dex also mentions them picking up emotions with their horns, which has nothing to do with anything, but is Audino's entire thing. At some point they decided to split them and the design went off in its own direction. Could always be wrong there, but it seems likely given what we know about betas.
Anyway, I'm... not big on these guys. I love the idea of a brownie Pokemon, but the heavily gendered butler/maid designs on these guys aren't doing it for me, and lean heavily into gender stereotypes (complete with the females being good at babysitting).
Plus there's something kind of uncomfortably house-elfish about them. It's mentioned that they get energy from feelings of gratitude, but it's never stated they enjoy cleaning/caretaking. I'm willing to assume they do, but it's pretty uncomfortable that the dex never specifies and they seem to need to do it to get food. (Also, the idea of these guys being obsessed with cleaning is great because imagine coming home one day to find that one has broken into your house, cleaned your room, and thrown out all your anime figures.)
Design-wise, those random face triangles are barely noticeable and add absolutely nothing to the designs. The body shapes also really bug me; I think they were going for a suit/petticoat look, but it just results in them looking dummy thicc because there's no division between their fur and their bodies. Overall, just really needed more refinement.
I will say that I'd kind of like to see these guys get an evolution, maybe something a bit more satyr-like. Lean into the brownie idea and get rid of the gender division and I could see it being really cool.
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amitlee · 3 years
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Withered Laughter
Heeeey guys long time no see. I got this idea from @dreamteamfluffz for a fic about Wither skeletons but they tickle players instead of killing them. One thing I’m going to mention before getting into this is that I changed an idea in my dummy thicc head so that instead of tickling them until the pass out or straight up die they just tickle the player until they are weakened.
Summary: Tubbo and Ranboo are doing a speed running challenge, Tubbo is sent into the nether alone to get blaze rods and gets a surprise.
Warnings: Swearing and tickling. Also the nether and mobs in it.
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“Tubbo. Portal. There. Go.” Ranboo pointed in the general direction while keeping up the bit of speed running talking instead of the actual game. He saw Tubbo look at him incredulously and decided he could spare one more word. “Please.”
Tubbo looked from the enderman to the portal “Yes. Me, you, go, let’s.” Tubbo walked over to the portal and got in, he paused and stepped out as he saw that his friend had not moved. “Ran? Whatcha doing?”
“Oh there you go, just break the bit. Break it right in half, bend it over your kne- ok I’m done. We can probably save time if we split up and get things from both worlds.” The tall boy explained after his playful rant.
Tubbo had never been too fond of the Nether, bad memories mixed and danger laced the uncharted terrains of the Underworld. Nonetheless, he was sure he could fend for himself long enough to get the items they needed. “You think so? I’ll do it but you have to promise that if I don’t come out in around 20 minutes to come help, ok? Do you remember last time when I got lost and had to trade my way back to the over world because of you mister? Who do you think I am, Jack Manifold?” Tubbo had never been able to keep a conversation very serious, one of the things Ranboo enjoyed about him most. He always managed to bring sunshine to every situation.
The pair agreed and went their separate ways.
Tubbo entered the Nether. Despite his distrust of the land, he could close his eyes and convince himself he was at the beach on a warm, sunny day. Perhaps there were children splashing around in the water or a family bonding over a picnic. He focused on these thoughts as he wrote down the coordinates of the portal and began the search for a fortress.
He was thankful for the golden boots he had forged before entering as he passed groups of peaceful piglins without having to break from his daydream. He continued his elaborate thoughts, he was walking in the sand -staying a safe distance from the water- he saw a life guard tower in the distance. He snapped out of his head and let himself see reality, it may have been upsetting if not for the nether fortress that was the life guard tower. He inwardly cheered and made his way into the fortress.
He was greeted by a chest with a saddle, nether warts, and a pair of golden leggings, but no blaze spawner. He started to make his way down the winding corridors while trying to remember what ways he had gone in case of emergency.
After 3 or so minutes of exploring without luck, he hit a dead end. “Damn” He spoke to himself and turned on his heals only to be met by a dark and boney figure looming over him. He shrieked and stumbled back a few paces, pulling out his sword. “Come at me, bitch.” Funny how he still attempted to keep his situations bright even when he was alone. Regardless, the Wither Skeleton didn’t seem affected by the presence of a weapon, be it Tubbos insults or his sword. It surged forward, gripping the boy firmly around the waist.
Tubbo began squirming immediately, he couldn’t believe he’d let himself get caught so easily, now he would have to respawn without his items and explain everything to Ranboo. He tried to turn around and swing as the wither skeleton but whipped around to face forward as he felt two hands squeeze his sides. No fucking way.
The hands continued to squeeze gently but firmly on the small boys sides, a metallic clang echoed as the sword fell to the ground. Tubbo wrapped his arms around himself much like a hug, what was meant for defense only seemed to trap his attackers hands in place. He resorted to confused giggles and continued squirming. He was enjoying the attention, however, with the combined weirdness of it being a mob doing the tickling and not knowing why it was happening in the first place, Tubbo was suspicious.
The smaller broke free of the Skeleton’s hold but panicked and backed himself into the corner while anticipation ate away at him, causing nervous giggle to flow like a river from his mouth. He turned to face the skeleton as he shrank into the corner with his hands up to block any moves. He successfully blocked the Skeleton’s first try by simply raising his hands, only to slam them back down when he felt kneading his stomach, what a dirty trick. He burst into laughter from such a weak spot being targeted.
“WAIHIHIHIT THIHihihis is strahahahange.” He calmed his wild laughter slightly and couldn’t help but melt. He’d always been soft for tickles, even though he was conflicted with the circumstances.
The kneading shifted down spots to his hips, rewarding his attacker with a squeak and higher pitch laughter. This spot was taken advantage of for a moment before the Wither Skeleton seemed to grow bored and try out other areas. Thighs were a mild spot but produced more squirming than other reactions, so they were ticked off the list.
The focus was soon back to his upper body as the Skeleton pinched from his hips up to his underarms and back down, watching for the best reaction. It was given as a spot on his lowest set of ribs were gently squeezed, the techniques varried from squeezing to vibrating the tips of their fingers into the small spots.
“NOHOHO! IT TIHI-TIHIHICKLES!” Tubbos face had a pink glow as he thought about how good he was being wrecked by this creature. He wasn’t sure what he should feel, but he was content as he enjoyed what was being dished out to him. He knew Ranboo would be entering the Nether soon to come search for him, so he wasn’t worried about being pushed over his limits.
A hand was shoved into his armpit while the other went to his tummy and began vibrating all 5 fingers. The hand in his armpit drilled it’s index finger. Tubbo slid his back down the wall, he was incapacitated by the wonderful sensations filling his system. The skeleton followed with no trouble, now leaning over the boy as he sat on the floor.
After a few minutes, tubbo’s laugh became more wheezy and breathless as he felt himself getting tired. Thankfully, his attacker seemed to notice his fatigue, it stopped both hands and let one go up to scritch and scratch at the Lee’s neck.
Tubbo leaned into the neck tickles and giggled freely, melting on the spot. These stopped shortly as well, leaving him laying on his side in the floor of the fortress as the Wither Skeleton walked back from wherever it had come from. Tubbo stayed in this position and tried to recover some strength.
That is how Ranboo found him, smiley and covered in charcoal smudges. “Tubbo! Are you alright? I got worried when you didn’t come back so I came over to get you, what’s all over you, man?” Ranboo knelt down by his friend and went to wipe a smudge from his neck.
Tubbo flinched before the hand even made contact, “Waihihit waihiht, Ranboo nohoho” He sat up and burried his face into the formality dressed teen’s shoulder as he hugged on to him.
Ranboo began to put the pieces together; Tubbo was giggly, flustered, cuddly, and lying on the floor seemingly tired. He must’ve seen one of the mods Ranboo had installed. Ranboo knew how Tubbo felt about the Nether, he decided to spice things up for the boy a little bit. He got a mod that makes some hostile mobs tickle you instead of doing actually damage, they are programmed to know when to stop and appearently leave behind flustered Tubbos.
“Ohhhh... I see. You must’ve met one of my friends, Mr. Wither Skeleton.” Ranboo teased and picked up Tubbo in his arms. “He got you good, didn’t he?” He chuckled and started walking back to the portal, timer completely forgotten about. “Alright Tubbs, you rest up and we’ll try this again later, okay? Sleep tight big man.” Ranboo rubbed the boy’s back to lull him to sleep.
In the end, they made it safely back to the Overworld, supplies or no supplies. Ranboo placed Tubbo in a small house he had made and let him curl up beside him to sleep: They both fell into a peaceful slumber next to each other.
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Yaaaayy! I really like this! Thank you so much again, @dreamteamfluffz , for letting me use some of your guidelines!
About the prompts in my inbox, I have seen them and will get working on the soon. Sorry for the wait and leaving for a hot minute!
Love you guys and thank you so much for reading💕💕
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