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#no matter how late i stayed up i ALWAYS woke up on time. which is good. and i nevee rly had 2 nap after
nomaishuttle · 1 year
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IM A LITTLE WORRIED THO BC LIKE. I DONT HAVE A LOT TO TALK ABT AT ALL..
#i havent rly Done anything whatsoever. im literally the unemployed friend#HOPEFULLY NOT FOR LONG. KNOCK KNOCK (sound of me knocking on wood)#but im worried theyll be like Soooo hows washington ^-^ and ill just be like umm. well. there is a window in my room. Whichh is pretty cool#<- joke i have like. been outside of the house a couple times...#very few actually. but its okay#going to see family will FIX ME. and when i come back ill HOPEFULLY (knock knock) have a job. whichll be great#and then ill be so busy and making money that i wont even have time to be depressed anymore#bc its FULLTIME !!!#8 hour shift 5 days a week 😏 soo yeah. my bones r gonna be sore 😏😏😏#but ill get over it and cope eventually. AND ill get to be somewhere other than The house 💀#i do like our house but i think im being driven insane just being here all the time. sometimes i sit on the porch#and like once every couple of weeks i go out for whatever reason. if i didnt SLEEP IN so much maybe id be able t run errands with hal more#butterlass. no i do rly need t fix it#im hoping going back t ky for a bit will kickstart it bc likee. when i first got here i was actually sleeping like..perfect schedule mode#id go to bed around 10-12 and wake up around 7-9. which is ideal..#BUT#Even if that doesnt. the job (knock knock) will force me t keep schedule#which is great. my last job aaaabsolutely forced me t keep schedule and it was rly rly nice..#no matter how late i stayed up i ALWAYS woke up on time. which is good. and i nevee rly had 2 nap after#im so excited for my workday schedule to come back bc i miss the routine of it#even tho the routine was rly just In the morning and the rest was a free for all..#ill also. this time around. make sure t include my morning meds and brushing my TEEF... bc i need t grt better abt that#im also gonna try n shower more often.. ive been managing abt every 3 days which im rly rly proud of bc its rly hard 4 me#but hopefullyy. with my schedule 😏😏 i could do daily showers...#prolly after work showers even. bc that sounds so nice#its judt hard bc Also after work the last thinng i want 2 do is be standing. bc i get so achy.. esp after an 8 hour shift#hopefully this job will be noce though. IF I GET IT. KNOCK KNOCK#i need t not like. place all my eggs in this basket bc if i dont get it im gonna be fucking crushed#but im rly rly rly hopeful. like reaaaally hopeful...#teehee :]] basically yayyy
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vaugarde · 2 years
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#can my mom like. please not jump to conclusions and be all weird about me#so bit of context for earlier post is that i was eating breakfast and i just woke up and my mom walked in and greeted my happily#and i just gave like a casual ''hey'' bc my mouth was full and she was like ''LOL wtf thats so rude! lets try again. hey!''#and i said hey again but tried to make it sound more chipper but failed bc im tired and she just groaned and walked into the other room#and we're supposed to go to the river today but shes trying to make plans to go today and tomorrow bc my aunt is coming today#and aunt has a tendency to try and keep people around for very late despite previousplans and my mom always goes with it#so she wants a day with just us. issue is i have to go into college tomorrow to do a meeting and i wanted to study#which. btw i told my mom abt earlier in the week saying id ask to attend virtually but she shut it down and INSISTED i go in person#and whatever plans we have dont matter so i should just go ahead and dedicate the day to schoolwork#so i remind my mom of this and suddenly shes like ''wtf. ur staying the whole day? cant you go for just the meeting and leave?''#which i didnt want to do bc the meeting is less time than the drive and she literally told me to stay the entire day#so i remind her and she gets frustrated and mad telling me i ''shouldnt limit myself and i should decide to go either today or tomorrow''#but probably should just study today bc ''well youre clearly in a bad mood for how u greeted me today so maybe you shouldnt come''#and basically ''come when youre in a better fucking mood tomorrow'' and like. well i WASNT in a bad mood i was just tired#but damn ok now i fucking am bc now youre getting mad at me for plans YOU fucking suggested i do#when i had a completely different plan at first that u tried to make out to be ridiculous#fucking hate it when she does this she also did it on vacation where she got snappy and passive aggressive and rude to me#bc she THOUGHT i was in a bad mood at the park when i wasnt. i just hadnt woken up all the day and wasnt talking#but instead of asking abt it or anything like that she got pissed and basically treated me like shit the whole day#and then when i confronted her she was just like ''ok we BOTH messed up i GUESS can we put it behind us''#it makes it hard to talk to her when theres an actual problem bc i try to communicate and she just takes it as a personal attack#so now i dont want to go out today just bc my moms being shitty and accusing me of not liking her sister (which ngl i really dont)#and yeah i dont want to stay out late when i did want to get at least one reading done today#but i had everything prepared and now i have full obligations to tomorrow bc she insisted i go ahead#and now shes acting like i did that to spite her#its so exhausting. probably gonna take like separate cars tho tbh so can leave even i f they get sucked in#and use the work as an excuse#echoed voice
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lovifie · 2 months
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Back Home
To my lovely anon 🙊.
Johnny "Soap" Mactavish x SisterFriend!Reader
When Johnny finally comes back home, only to find his sister's best friend living in his house.
Soap got injured on the last mission. A bullet too close, well, not close, through. And not a bullet, a knife to the shoulder which left him in a sling. And now he needed almost absolute rest for a month until he was re-evaluated to see how it was healing.
It was Price's idea to go back home, it's been years since he saw his family and when Price mentioned it, guilt started to pool in his stomach.
So he took the first plane home and flew back. Reaching land in the middle of the night, he picked up a cab and went home. The humidity and coldness of his beloved Scotland made his shoulder hurt more; he couldn't wait to get home. 
Once there, he picked up the key from under the mat that he so often told his mum to put away and entered the house. Making a beeline to his room, silent so as to not wake up anyone. And as soon as he took off his shoes, he threw himself into his bed. And the bed talked back.
“Bitch, I told you to go to your bed, I don't want a fucking sleepover.” A girl's voice erupted from under the cover, a hand pushing him off the bed. Well, he stood up, there is no way you would move him with just a hand while half asleep.
“Excuse me?” Soap asks, more offended than surprised he was pushed off his bed. The man's voice woke you up fast, whipping your head around at it and turning on the bedside lamp to see anything in the dark. 
It only takes you a second to recognise your best friend’s brother, the mohawk recognisable everywhere. “Johnny?” You asked.
He asked your name back just as surprised. “What are you doing here?” He asks
“It's… it's a long story actually, I-I’ll go to your sister's room.” You say standing up, leaving his bed for him. “What happened to your shoulder?”
He peels his eyes away from you, suddenly remembering the one thing outside of his family that he always thought about. 
His sister is just a couple of years younger than him, and they always went to the same school, and later on, high school. His sister and you met in kindergarten, and ever since you were joined by the hip. Monkey 1 and Monkey 2, his mother would joke about how she didn't know she birthed twins. 
When the three of you were younger, you were just another annoying brat like his little sister. But once he reached puberty, he started to look at you differently. You were still an annoying brat, but he started to like the way you annoyed him. 
Johnny loved to be in his room, but whenever he knew you were coming he would insist on being in the living room; even if it was just to catch a glimpse as you walked up to your sister's room. 
The thing he hated the most about you? Your boyfriend. The fucking stupid boyfriend that couldn't see how amazing you were, the fucking stupid boyfriend that you cried about so much, the fucking stupid boyfriend that he would fight with so much. 
The last thing he knew about him before he enlisted, was that he had proposed to you and that you had said yes. 
But know, until just a moment ago, you were sleeping on his bed, with an old sweatshirt of his on. He was smiling to himself, the “long story” suddenly short when he connected the dots. 
He wanted to tell you to stay and sleep with him. But he was exhausted and cold, and his shoulder only hurt more and more. And if you hit it on your sleep, he wouldn't forgive you, no matter how much you were the love of his life. 
You were still looking at him, waiting for his answer. Even pointing at his shoulder so he would remember. “Oh.” He said looking at his shoulder. “It's classified.”
You rolled your eyes at his answer and started to walk out of the room; and just when you were almost out you turned to look at him.
“I'm glad you are back, Johnny.”
And in that moment, he knew he had a chance.
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The next morning he woke up incredibly late in comparison with his usual time to wake up. But to the rest of the mortals, it was still early. In fact, only his mom was awake when he walked into the kitchen. 
Giving her a warm hug that the both of them so desperately needed after being away for so long. With a cup of coffee in between, they talked on the kitchen table until his sister woke up as well and after you told her he was back she flew downstairs hugging his brother in a crushing hug. 
You went downstairs too after stretching out and when you saw the image you remained at the doorway, not wanting to intrude on their reunion. 
“Say hi to Johnny, you cunt.” Your best friend lovely said. 
“I already did last night.” You say, before thinking of the double meaning. Johnny catches immediately, a mischievous grin on his face. He wishes you had welcomed him that way. “I thought it was you, crying about wanting to sleep together again.” 
“Whatever, who came to my bed last night at the end?” She answers, smiling proudly. 
You scoff at her. “Well, I'm sorry that I let the wounded soldier that came home after three years to sleep on HIS bed.” You say chuckling, you turn to him. “You are allowed to make arrests, right? According to your sister, seems this is my fate.”
You put your hands together, extending them before you for him to put handcuffs around your wrists. He'll put them soon, he still needs to choose if he wants to tie you to the bed or to him. 
His sister slaps your arm, calling you dramatic, before working on making breakfast with your help. Something about the way you fit in just right with the people he loves the most, still wearing his sweatshirt truly warms him inside. 
“So… how's Adam?” Johnny asks, he needs to know if the coast is clear. But the way both his mom and sister look at him the moment he talks makes it regretted. And the way the knife you were using falls from your hand on the counter, lets him know everything he needs.
“He's fine.” You answer quietly, and Johnny can almost see the walls building around you. Shit, shit, shit. 
You wipe your hands on the tablecloth, turning around. “I think we are out of milk, I'll go buy some.” You say, walking out of the kitchen. Johnny is quick on his feet walking behind you. “I'll go with you.” 
You look up to him as you tie your shoes, nodding without saying anything more. He puts his boots on as well, trying to tie the laces with just a hand. “Let me do it.” You say, no room to argue and you tie his boots quickly. 
Once on the street, you walk next to each other. The shop is not far, but you walk slowly. Johnny knows you want to talk but he doesn't push it. Leaving you to choose the moment. “I actually don't know how he is doing.” You admit, looking at him. “Adam, I mean. I haven't heard from him since the wedding.”
“You got married?” Johnny asks, frankly surprised. He didn't get the invite.
“No. Thank god, I didn't.” You answer quickly, disgust clear on your face. “Almost, but I didn't.”
“What happened?” 
“He cheated. With one of my bridesmaid, during the rehearsal dinner.” You laugh, but without a bit of humour on it. “I was talking with his mom about what we would name the first grandkid, and he was getting another girl pregnant in the bathroom.”
As you talk, your voice breaks, tears flooding your eyes as you cover your face.
“Hey, hey, c’mere.” He motions, hugging you with his nice arm. Good thing he wasn't invited, or else you'll know perfectly fine where the asshole was. Buried six feet under.
“I'm sorry, I'm sorry.” You say, but still burying your face on his chest. “I should get over it, I know. It's been months now, but…”
“No apologies, bonnie. That's a perfectly acceptable reaction.” He says, cupping your face to look at your face. Fuck, are breathtakingly stunning when crying. “Fuck him, all right? You were always too good for him anyway.”
He knows he is exposing himself like this, and that it is obviously not fair to you. But his eyes land on your parted lips, and fuck does he wants to bite. Something must click inside your head, because you suddenly turn around, walking again and wiping the tears from your face. 
“Yeah, you are right, Johnny. Fuck him.” You say, smiling at him but sadness is still in your eyes.
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It isn't until a couple of days later that he doesn't get to talk to you alone again. He is lying on his bed, scrolling through his phone before going to sleep. A knock on his door disrupts him.
“C’mon in.” He says, looking at the door waiting to see who is it. Happiness floods his senses when he sees it's you.
“Are you busy?” You ask, only your head poking in. Soap quickly shakes his head, patting the bed next to him. You walk inside the room and sit cross-legged next to him. “Is it okay if I sleep here tonight? Your sister is beating me up on his sleep. At least I hope she's asleep.” 
He simply peels the covers back, letting you get inside. He lets his phone on the bedside table, focusing only on you, and lays on his side, grateful the wounded shoulder in on the left side. 
“How's your shoulder?” You ask, grabbing a finger from the hand resting on his chest.
“It's better, glad it's not my right one. I wouldn't be able to do anything.” He says
You smile at him, your hand moving to play with the name tags on his chest. “Do you know that Adam was deadly jealous of you?”
“What? He had you, what could I have to make him jealous?” He asks, not even realising his declaration of love.
“My attention.” You answer, looking at his face. “He always said that he didn't know why I was marrying him if it was clear I was in love with you.” 
He looks at your face, catching you looking at his lips. “Were you?”
“Hm?”
“In love with me, were you?”
“To the bone.”
And that's all he needs before he's crushing his lips on yours. He hates he can't move his arm, needing to push you closer. But lucky for him, you do it yourself. Moving your arms around his neck, getting as close as you can.
He rolls, moving you along to lay on top of him, finally moving the arm he was propping himself on to pull you closer. Butterflies on his stomach going nuts at his lifelong crush kissing him, taking the breath from his lungs.
You straddle his hips, leaning down to keep kissing him as his hand finds its way to the back of your head. “I love you, bonnie. I have loved you for years.” He whispers against your lips, making you whimper. 
“Show it to me, Johnny. Show me how much.” You whisper against his lips, moaning when he grinds his hips around your clothed cunt.
His hand pulls his sweatshirt off of you, you help him take it off, and it leaves you bare from hips up. He groans at the sight, his hand moving to your arse to push you forward so he can kiss your boob. 
You sit at his chest, his hand getting under your pants and underwear, him grunting when he feels your wetness on his fingertips. You arch your back when his finger easily slips inside because of how slick your entrance is, him moaning around your chest; sucking and licking at your nipple making you moan. 
“Johnny.” You moan, him shushing you quickly.
“I ken, bonnie. But I need to get this tight pussy ready, right? Make you feel good.” He moans when he feels your hand palm his crotch. “Fuck, press it harder, love.”
A second finger enters your cunt, stretching you as he scissors them. You pull his pants and underwear down, enough for his dick to spring free. You marvel your eyes on the thick, veiny, heavy piece of meat between his legs, wondering about the taste of the oozing precum from his tip; a sharp pain on your nipple pulling you away when Soap bites down. 
“Don't even think about it, bonnie. Not today.” He says, his fingers pulling out of you and tugging the pants down. “Take them off, love. And lay on your side.”
You quickly do as he says, hating that you need to stand away from him to do it. You lay next to him, his eyes glued on your body. He grunts, managing to keep his arm under you, pulling you against him. 
This one is officially his most hated injury up to date, needing to push you closer. He latches at your neck, tasting, sucking and biting your skin. Wanting more, needing more. 
“You need a hand, Johnny?” You ask, heavy breathing when you feel his hard dick probe around your pussy but not being able to enter you without a hand around it.
Johnny chuckles in your ear. “Bonnie, I'll rip my arm off to do it if you don't help me right now.”
You laugh back at him, lowering a hand between your legs parting them and fisting his dick making him moan as you align it with your entrance.
Your laugh turns into a moan when he slowly starts to sink in. When he finally bottoms out, he stays still for a minute, hugging you, pulling you close. You turn your head back and kiss him deeply, he starts to move his hips, catching with his mouth every moan that slips from yours. 
It is such a chaotic situation, one of his arms is trapped inside of the sling, the other is trapped under your body, he is still wearing all his clothes, and you are having sex on his childhood bedroom with his mom and sister just on the other side of the hall. 
Still, it's the best sex of your life. His dick is stretching you as no other dick has ever, he is reaching places inside of you that have never been touched before and that now will need to be touched forever, he keeps kissing you like you were an oxygen tank in the depths of the ocean and you wish you would stay like this forever. 
But with the way his hips are thrusting into you and the hand under your body finds its way to your clit, you know there is not much left.
“I love you, bonnie. I fucking love you so much.” He says between moans. “I'm gonna marry you and I'm gonna love you forever. Gonna make a family with you, bonnie. I love you, I can't wait to fucking marry you. Marry me, please, bonnie.”
“Yes, fuck” you moan back, nails sinking into the skin of his ass when you grab him urging him to fuck you harder. 
Johnny thinks is the longest couple of minutes until you finally cum, wanting to hold on just to feel you clench around him; milking him dry when you do with his name in your mouth. 
The two of you stay panting, still in each other embrace. Johnny's dick still softening inside of you with no urge to get it out. 
“Did you mean it?” You ask him.
“Did you?” He asks back, suddenly too aware of what he just said.
“I meant it if you did.” You say childishly, turning your head around.
“I did.” He says, looking at your eyes. “We should probably date before getting married, right?”
“Maybe not.” You say, still looking at his eyes.
You stay looking at each other eyes, looking for any kind of doubt in them. You speak first; “The courthouse opens at 9.”
“We can have breakfast after.” He says, as if that's the correct answer.
“I'd love to have breakfast with you tomorrow, Johnny.” You answer, because to you it is the right answer. 
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Hii, lovies!! 💗
Let me know if you liked it and if you'll like to write any of the other options of the ask 💗
Oh, and also, there is BIG little something starting today hehe so stay tunned my beloved ❤️❤️❤️
TagList: @whos-fran @thevoidwriting @sklt987659 @kayden666 @dumb12bvtch1212 @thatonepupkai @glocuseguardian3rd @darkangel4121 @risingofjupiter @spadekip @herefor-tojis-tits @lunari0 @dukeofjjune @soupinasock @marymustdie @arbesa-mind @cmbghost @dilara-del @multifandomheathenannie @emotion-no-hot-yes-hotel-trivago @tooloudarts @panikk-attackkk @reap3erslov3 @mothsdrabbles
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xveenusx · 6 months
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Indifference
Paring(s): Rafe Cameron x fem!reader
Summary: Two people who are in love, well he used to be
Authors note: you guys like when I make you cry
Rating: angsty
Warnings: it'll hurt :)
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He was late.
Time was a funny thing. Minutes turned to hours which rolled into days then suddenly months began to blur into years. In that time, people tend to go out and experience things, falling in and out of love, enjoying everything life had to offer.
Yet, I somehow found myself motionless, the spark that once ignited my core had been stifled to a small ember. Life continued to pass by while I remained glued in one place, watching as everyone around me attempted to achieve some form of happiness.
I was once like that. Filled with some much hope for a life with someone I loved, who showed up to support me and believed in my capability, because at one time in my life that was exactly what Rafe was.
Like I said, time was a funny thing. The more time passes with your partner, the more comfortable they seem to get. They stop trying. However, at what point does being comfortable become almost negligent?
Dates were canceled, appointments missed, and important accomplishments forgotten the more time went on. Rafe’s priorities shifted and I went from being the center of his world to being a planet merely circling his gravitational pull.
In his mind, we were forever, so a couple of cancellations here and there and bouts of forgetfulness were nothing in the span of things. I would have agreed had the cancellations not doubled with time or our conversations going from intimate and deep to surface level at best.
He was never home. It was always just me in this large house on figure 8.  Suddenly, he went from being the moon and the stars to just a bleak, unforgivable starless night. Cold and dark.
We had met when we were 16 and he was every bit a spoiled little rich boy that had extreme daddy issues, but there was more to him than that. I picked at his defenses until finally they shattered, and I was engulfed by all of him.
He was just different around me and that fact alone left me delighted. It made me feel special, almost stupidly so.
Things between Rafe and his father were already tense enough since Rafe bought a motorbike with the money he was supposed to spend on the generator. Then everything began to snowball out of control from there. He threw himself into his father’s work and when he wasn’t doing that, he was with Kells and Topper doing god knows what and snorting anything he could find.
Despite all of this, Rafe always kept me close and always let me in. 
Last year, when Ward had gone with Sarah and John B to South America, and didn’t return, something shifted inside him. His defenses were rebuilt, only this time he left me on the outside, and no matter how hard I tried to break him down brick by brick, nothing worked. He became obsessed with running Ward’s real estate empire better than he ever did.
Rafe was a cold and calculated legacy with a large chip on his shoulder that made him lethal against competing firms. He chewed them up and spit them out.
With every major milestone, it was never enough for him, and like a man possessed he continued to ruthlessly target anyone that had done him wrong. We had everything and yet the bitterness seemed to consume him. He was someone I saw once a day if I was lucky. He always left before I woke up and was never home by the time I went to bed and suddenly we were glorified roommates.
Once upon a time, I would stay up waiting for him with my heart in my hand, hoping to connect in any way. Even if I only had a few minutes to spend with him before he went to sleep, it was enough for me. But, 10 pm became 11 pm which turned into 12 am and so I gave up. My sleep schedule was already a mess as thoughts and insecurities pestered my mind of another woman.
“Any word from him yet? Some of the donors are asking for him?” The question pulls me out of my thoughts and I turn to face my assistant, Rai.
Her question is innocent enough, but I can hear the slight concern in her voice and I know she has her doubts which only serves as another humiliating reminder that Rafe has done this to me repeatedly.
But this was different. He knew how important this charity dinner was to the shelter I opened up for women and children who suffered from domestic violence.
As someone who came from the cut, it was everywhere and so many didn’t have the means to flee and so they were forced to stay and in the most severe instances, die.
Rafe gave me the start-up money as a gift and it was a huge success that I opened several more as well as fund for scholarships for both the mothers and kids. Which is what brings me to now, a charity dinner and auction to help fund said scholarships and pay for all the shelter necessities.
He promised he would be here. It’s important for the donors to see him here seeing as though he donated a huge sum once more and could ease the minds of those who are teetering on the edge. It’s also important to me. This project is mine, something I created and shared with the world and I want to share it with him too.
I want him to celebrate this accomplishment with me and he is nowhere to be found.
“He’ll be here. Rafe promised.” I clear my throat, “He knows how important this is to me.”
Rai gave me a doubtful look and I know that I couldn’t convince her anymore than I could convince myself. The engagement ring that bore my finger instantly weighed a ton.
Glancing down at the large diamond that once meant the promise of everything, stared back at me as nothing more than a simple accessory.
Rafe had proposed and foolishly I believed that it would save us so I said yes.
I stayed and time and time again, the disappointment slowly began to etch away at the childish hope I tried to cling onto until only a dull ache remained.
“Don’t you look lovely?” Plastering a fake smile onto my face, I let out a sheepish laugh as I take in Kiara’s parents. 
“Thank you guys so much for coming.” The words ring true but I couldn’t help but feel like I was underwater. My focus is shot and I find myself hardly listening with my eyes darting to the front door every minute or so, desperate to see the man I used to think would never stop loving me. 
I float around the room, committed to being a gracious host, because I would not let him take this from me too. Not when he’s taken everything else already. This is the only piece left of me. 
My cheeks hurt two hours later from all the fake smiles and my throat burns from the feigned laughing. The sound of my own voice makes me wince. 
In those two hours, I felt my confidence slowly get chipped piece by piece as everyone questioned where my fiancé was. And for a moment, I hated him. I truly hated him because even this small piece of heaven I made for myself is tied into him. 
Honey, I need to run some numbers with Rafe. Where is he hiding? 
Where is the biggest investor? Surely, he’s here, right?
I haven't seen Mr. Cameron. Has he stepped out? 
With which I responded,” Work emergency, you know how it is. He’s nothing if not committed.” Considering most of these possible donors run their own large companies, they completely understand but it’s their partners reactions that seem to leave me stunned. 
Each had a warm look of understanding dancing in their eyes as I’m sure they’ve used the same excuse time and time again.
I can only take so much. So I excuse myself and glance at the small gold heart shaped watch on my delicate wrist and take note of the time.
There was only 30 minutes left and I haven't gotten so much as a text from him. 
A pit began to form where my stomach used to be as I realized once more that he wasn’t coming. As I stood in a packed room, filled with a flurry of activity, surrounded by people, I’ve never felt more alone.
Then my eyes connect with Mrs. Dune, the wife of a finance guru that works alongside Rafe. She was much older than I, having been with her husband for 30 years but she looked even older. 
It’s almost as though she can read my thoughts, because she sends me a sad smile as she lets her eyes go to where her husband stands talking to other donors. I haven't seen him talk to her the whole night, instead she’s been standing at his side saying nothing. 
I take an uneven breath and my eyes widen in realization. Was this what I had to look forward to? A life sentence of loneliness vacant of any warmth and attention? 
Swallowing hard, I force my eyes away and stare at the door. Begging whoever will listen to please, this once, let me be wrong. I’m so in my thoughts that I’m startled when a soft hand lands on my arm.
“You get used to it. Eventually, you’ll feel nothing.” Mrs. Dune says quietly, her eyes moving back to her husband, with a look I can only describe as longing. 
That’s the thing. I don't want to get used to it. This isn’t how I want to be loved.
“What you’ve accomplished is amazing. Don’t let him take that away from you.” Was her parting words and she left, not sparing her husband another glance. 
When I turn to see if he noticed she left, he’s still engaged in conversations and doesn’t spare her a glance. 
This is not how I want to be loved. 
“Hey, I’ve been looking for you. This is Amy Park.” Rai looks ecstatic as she introduces me to the stunning tall woman next to her. 
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Ms. Park.” The words come out on instinct.
“I wanted to discuss how open you would be to expanding shelters nationwide?”
And for the first time in awhile, a real smile graces my face as I answer her question. 
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The first thing I notice when I pull into our driveway is the plethora of cars that fill it. The second thing I pick up on is familiar vibrations of music with each step I take along our pathway. 
My front door is wide open as people come in and out, clearly under the influence of something and my chest constricts. 
This is what he’s been doing? This was more important than me? 
Clutching my keys tightly, I welcome the familiar biting against my skin. I recognize many of the faces, most of them having gone to school with Rafe. 
If it was any other night, I would have joined them. We were only 22 and yet have lived what seems to be a hundred lives. But, this is different. He’s different. 
Climbing up the staircase, I head to the balcony where I hear a familiar boast of laughter. 
I cleared my throat. “What’s so funny?”
Heads snap in my direction but my eyes are only on one. One that currently has a short black haired girl nearly in his lap. I recognize her as a bartender at one of the local grills/bars we frequent. 
“Don’t you look gorgeous-“ Topper attempts to run interference, but it’s too late. I raise my hand to silence him. I’ve already seen everything I needed too. 
His body is positioned slightly in front of them as if I was going to body slam them. I might actually. 
“Hey, wait! How did the donor dinner go?” Topper's eyes dart to Rafe’s. “That was tonight right?”
I see the moment everything clicks. His eyes rake down from my newly styled hair to the louboutins in my feet. Everything I wore from the jewelry on my body to the shoes on my feet he bought me, and I’ve never felt more sick.
Rafe clenches his eyes shut as he shakes his head. “Fuck.”
Fuck, indeed.
“Get out of my way, Topper.”
He throws a worried glance to Rafe. “I think maybe-“
“Top, give us a second.” Rafe mutters tensely. He keeps his hard set gaze on me, drilling into me, almost as though he’s daring me to move. 
Kelce stands up giving me an apologetic look. “Rafe, man, there’s a bunch of people here.”
I force myself to look away. 
“Not right now, Kells.” 
He wasn’t wrong. This house was full of people, but the only difference being that none of them matter. Not to me and not to Rafe. 
Steady. Keep steady and just breathe. 
“So what should I do-“
I look at him. Me or them? It was unsaid but he knew what I was asking him. 
“Back the fuck off and give me a fucking second with my girl.” Rafe barks out, running a rough hand through the short cropped strands that brush against his forehead. 
Both hold their hands up in mock surrender before shuffling off to the side. The girl doesn’t get up. 
Topper coughs. “Sophia.” 
Her eyes take me in with clear distaste. Her hand is still dangerously close to Rafe’s waistband. I raise a single eyebrow giving her one last opportunity to move. 
She doesn’t. Not when Kelce calls out for her either.
Sophia made her bed. Setting my bag down, I take three big steps before I’m roughly shoving her off the couch sending her sprawling on the floor. 
Rafe let’s out a curse but makes no move to help her. At least he’s not stupid.
“Get out.” The words leave no room for negotiation.
The glare she sends me is filled with ice. “I was invited.”
Kelce lets out a groan before whispering,”Is she serious?”
The fake smile I’ve perfected over the years decorated my face as I bent down to her height on the floor. 
Flashing my engagement ring in her face. “Get out of my fucking house.”
That seems to shut her up and I watch with narrowed eyes as she struts away, Topper and Kelce in tow.
I can hear my heart pounding in my ears while my chest feels like it’s going to explode. I turn around slowly to face my damnation. 
My heels click against the marble floor and with each step I take, the more the ache in my chest grows. Marching up to Rafe, I grab his chin and force him to look at me. Those familiar glacial blue eyes are red. His pupils are blown wide and my chest cracks wide open. 
He’s high. 
This is not how I want to be loved. 
This is what he wanted to do instead of being there for me. Instead of supporting me. Instead of loving me. 
Dying would be less painful.
 I stare directly into those eyes, searching for an answer, wondering when the love he felt for me slowly became indifference.
I’d almost rather there be a mistress rather than this cold indifference.
“Did you have fun at least?” My words are soft but the intention is anything but. 
He says nothing. Instead Rafe studies me like I’m a wounded animal. 
Dark. Beautiful. Cruel. 
Those are the words I’d use to describe the man in front of me. The gaze that once felt like a soft caress on my skin now felt clinical. 
“It seems like you’re having fun.” I quip, flicking the small bag filled with familiar white powder. 
I thought I could fix him. I will not make that mistake again.
“I completely forgot-“
“How?” I ask. 
His eyes narrow like he’s trying to figure me out. “Work got insanely busy. You know how it is. Even if I own the place, I’m young and the older guys don’t respect me.”
“It was in your work calendar.” 
“No, it wasn’t-“
“It was also on your personal calendar and our joint one. I had your assistant send you a reminder email. So my question is how?” My voice wobbled and it was only by a small miracle that I didn’t throw something in his face. “How did you forget the only thing I’ve asked you for?” 
Something flickered in his eyes. “It wasn’t intentional. It slipped my mind.”
“Something I worked so hard to accomplish just slipped your mind?” Exhaustion has finally got the better of me and I finally let him see just how much he’s managed to chip away. 
“I should have been there for you and I’m so sorry,” His throat flexed a hard swallow. “But there will be other dinners.” 
The dull ache in my chest thrummed harder. Rafe was brushing this off, just like he always did. My skin flushed. 
At my silence, he braces his elbows on his knees and leans forward, tracking my every move. “I feel like you’re not understanding me.”
“No, I understand you just fine. It just wasn’t important enough for you.”
He stilled. “That’s not what I meant and you know it.”
Of course it wasn’t what he meant but he’s managed to make me feel so insignificant. So small. 
“I know that you’ve canceled most of our dates for work. Even an anniversary once. I know that you missed the grand opening of the shelter that I spent a year and half planning.” I force the words out, each breath I take feeling like needles. “I asked for this one thing, Rafe and you couldn’t even give me that.” 
“What about everything I have given you? This house, the car you drive in, the clothes on your back, the boat?”
It’s like I’m staring at 16 year old Rafe again. To him, material things were the equivalent to love. He couldn’t be farther from the truth.
I find that I was much happier when I had little to nothing, than I am now, sitting here with everything, in my gown and jewels. 
“I didn't ask for any of those things.” By the stubborn gleam in his eyes, I knew he was going to fight me on everything. 
Lately, his tactic was always combative and it was easier to give in or to not say anything at all. 
 “No, but you took them all the same. I fucked up, I get that. I know what this shelter means to you, but that doesn’t change the fact that you wouldn’t even have it if it weren’t for me.”
A familiar buzzing filled my ears. His words were ugly but they weren’t a lie. Even my project was his. I had nothing of my own.
I wonder how many other people came to the same revelation. Maybe that’s why so many of them asked where he was? Because this accomplishment wasn’t mine, no clearly it was his.
There is not enough room in my chest for the ache he caused. 
Words can’t seem to make it to my lips. I think my brain has finally broken and realizes that no words I say will get him to change. 
Smoothing out my dress, I stand on shaky legs before kicking off my heels. He can keep them. With that, I leave him out on the porch and make a beeline towards our his room. 
Opening the closet doors, I reach for the suitcase before setting it on the bed. I wasn’t going to be like Mrs. Dune and waste away beside a man that used to love me, hoping that one day he will once more. 
“What the fuck are you doing?” The words are hard and low. 
Rafe stands at the door, his arms crossed over his chest. His face is brewing with several emotions I can't quite place. 
It was funny. I haven't seen this much emotion from him in months.
I ignore him and toss some clothes from my dresser into the open suitcase, making sure to grab only the clothes I needed.
I slowly take off each piece of jewelry and set it on my vanity. He can keep everything he so gloriously mentioned he bought. 
“You loved me once.” I state, tilting my head to the side. I rake over every detail of his face, knowing I’ll never forget it. 
I loved him once too. 
His face morphed to one of confusion before disbelief. “I still love you. That’s never changed.” 
I shake my head. “Yes, it has.”
Rafe stalks towards me, his hand reaching to burl around my neck while the other pulls me to him by my waist. Familiar cologne fills my lungs and I count to ten mentally. It was the same cologne I bought him when we first started dating. 
“I work too much, I know. That’s my fault and I’ll cut back. I’ll be home more and we can spend time together. I’ll do better.” Taking my chin between two fingers, he forces my eyes to his. I see the sincerity in his eyes but I know how this goes. 
The same way it’s gone the last two times. He’ll beg me to stay, promise to change, and things will be good for a month before he slowly starts missing dates or canceling trips we’ve planned months before. Then the cycle repeats. 
“No.” It was time to love myself. Since he clearly couldn’t do it. I will not allow myself to get lost in him again. 
“Baby, just wait. Will you wait-“ He huffs as I try to move around him. No such success as his towering body has me moving back and suddenly I’m caged in by his arms. “Just give me a second, okay?”
“I’ve given you years. I won’t give you another second.” 
“Talk to me.” His voice breaks. “Please just talk to me.”
Longing filled my body. Words I’ve been waiting to hear for months come so easily to him, but only when I already have one foot out the door.
 “I’m alone.” The words come out strangled. “ I’m alone in this. I have been for a long time.”
“What do you mean? Baby, I’m right here.” Rafe’s gripping onto me tighter, almost like he’s ensuring I don’t leave. “I’m right here.”
“You're never here. That’s exactly my point.” 
Rafe’s eyes widen before he shakes his head wildly, staring at me like I’m speaking another language. “That’s not true-“
“What’s today?”
“What?” 
“What’s today?” I repeat, my eyes never leaving his. I want to see every emotion that storms in his eyes, just to remind myself that he is capable of emotion after all. 
“Friday.” 
I smile at him sadly. Exactly my point. “I haven't seen you since Tuesday.” 
“No, that can’t be right. I was with you when we had lunch with-“ He breaks off, reaching for his phone in his pocket. I watch as he pulls up his calendar, an action that mortifies me, and confirms our scheduled date.
 “Tuesday.” He whispers, shocked even. 
I wasn’t. Rafe had to check his calendar to confirm that last time he’s seen his fiancé. 
“You used to come bring me lunch. If you were more than a couple hours, you always found your way to me or gave me a call that you’ll be late.” I shrugged, blinking back the tears stinging my eyes. “Now, I don’t think I’d get a call if you were in the hospital.”
The buzzing in my ears intensifies.
 “You didn’t tell me any of this. None of how you were feeling and you're ready to walk out the door without so much as an argument.” A spark of my old Rafe appears as frustration dances across his face.
“I should have-“
“You’re giving up.” He states, shaking his head in anger. 
Maybe I was. “I’m tired of fighting for us. You gave up a long time ago.” 
Large hands curl around my cheeks, pulling me towards his face. Rafe rests his forehead on mine, his piercing blue eyes darting across my face in panic. 
“I love you. I love you.” He knows he’s grasping at straws, but we feel like strangers now. The words don’t feel like they used to. “You know I love you.”
 “This isn’t how I want to be loved, Rafe. I see you every couple days, the only time we’re ever together is when we have sex.” We lost sight of how we once were. The only thing that remained good between us was sex. 
That alone isn’t healthy. He goes to open his mouth but I cut him off.
“We never talk and when we do, you don’t even listen to me. Your brain is always somewhere else.” 
“I’m in a relationship with a ghost. I’m not letting you suck the life out of me anymore.” My eyes catch the sparkling ring that once brought me such happiness. Now, it simply feels like a ball and chain. 
Before I can convince myself otherwise, I start to tug it off my finger when Rafe truly begins to panic. 
“Don’t do that. Please don’t do that.” I try to hand it to him but Rafe jolts back like he’s been burned. The look he gives my empty hand is nothing short of destroyed.
I think I’m going to throw up. His words are laced with raw grief that makes it hard for me to breathe.
“Put it back on.” I hear the slight tremble in his voice.
“No.” My lips wobble. 
“Please put it back on because if you don’t that means we’re over. That’s not us. We aren’t supposed to end.”
“Rafe, don’t make this any harder than it already is.”
“You’re ripping my fucking heart out of my chest. This isn’t anywhere near hard, it’s excruciating.” Rafe’s hand is notably shaking, but he tries to hide it by clenching and unclenching his palms. 
“Welcome to the last year of my life.” The words are brutal but he needs to hear them. 
“You promised me we’d never end.” 
“You promised to change. I guess we both lied.”
Rafe raises his voice, his arms thrown up in the air in clear distress, “How can you just stand there?”
It was a miracle I haven’t collapsed on my shaky legs yet. The adrenaline pumping though my veins was the only thing getting me through this torture. “Rafe, stop it.”
“You talk about indifference?” Rafe lets out a humorless laugh, shaking his head up at the ceiling. “Who’s heartless now, baby?”
“You don’t get to put this on me. I’ve given you years of my life, showered you with nothing but love and support. I asked for one night, one fucking night, in your busy schedule and you didn’t bother to show up, or send a simple text.” I intake a sharp breath, pushing the hair out of my face with a shaky hand. “Instead, you threw a party in our home and got high.”
I point a finger at his chest, staring at him with open heartbreak. “I needed you,” The tightness in my chest finally pops as I choke on a loud sob, “I needed you and you weren’t there.”
“I lost sight of what’s important to me. I’m just trying to give you everything-” I cut him off. 
Grabbing the clothes I haphazardly tossed in the suitcase, ”You want this? Take it,” I shove them into his chest, “Take all of it. I don’t want it. I’d give this all away in a heartbeat if it meant I could have you back.”
I meant every word. I wanted my best friend back, the person I confided in and depended on. I wanted our late nights back watching trashy reality TV. We used to sit in the bathtub together basking in each other's company. Went on walks along the beach or took the boat out for hours, fucking on the deck, not caring that anyone could see. 
It used to be simple. He loved me and I loved him. 
“I’m angry, baby.I’m so damn angry all the time. At my fucking dad for always having these impossible expections. Then he goes and dies, leaving me without a clue on how to manage everything.” Rafe sags against the wall, exhaustion marring his features, his blue eyes pleading for me to understand. “I feel like I’m drowning all the time.”
I had no idea this was how he was feeling. But, he never let me in. “You could have told me, we’re supposed to be partners in this. You asked me to marry you!”
I think deep down I know that he felt me slipping through his fingers at one point. He could see clearly how unhappy I’ve become and that’s why he proposed. And maybe just like him, I thought the proposal could fix us. This proposal was being manipulated on both ends, it was doomed from the start.
You can’t fix what’s already broken. 
“My head has basically been a war zone and I’m losing. The only thing keeping me sane is that I know, when I walk through that door,” he points to our bedroom door, “I’m going to find you in our bed. Every. Single. Night.” 
“I can’t let the ugly touch you.” My heart splits into two at his words. Words I know feel like acid leaving his mouth. “You’re the only thing I have left.”
“Then you should have taken better care of me. You should have let me take care of you.” 
“Fuck,” He screams, bending down and swiping the lamp clean of the nightstand. The lamp goes flying into the wall, shattering into hundreds of pieces and my eyes are drawn to them. I can’t help but think it reminds me of us.
Dragging my eyes back to his, I fight the urge to wrap him in my arms. Seeing him in pain has never brought me joy, but this was brutal. His eyes shined with unmistakable tears, realizing the strength of my resolve. 
There was no going back this time. There was no trying again. I didn’t have another try in me. 
I grip onto the fabric of my dress moving towards him, my heart pounding out of my chest. He moves instantly, holding out his hand to guide me over the shattered lamp. Why couldn’t he be like this months ago?
Why did he let it get this bad? Why couldn’t he love me?
Now, standing in front of him, I let myself one deep breath, basking in the comforting smell of him. A large hand curls around my neck, his grip strong and firm, demanding my attention. His blue eyes are daunting and so intense, I find myself fighting the urge to look away.
“I’m going to get you back.”
”Take it, Rafe.” I whisper, uncurling his limp hand, “Take it. It doesn’t mean what I want it to.”
Tears blur my vision as I fumble with the ring he refuses to take.
 Rafe shakes his head, clenching his jaw tightly. “There’s no point in taking it off if it’s gonna go right back there in a couple weeks. ”
I can’t help but smile at the determination in his voice. He sounds like the old Rafe and for a second I see a glimmer of who he used to be.
 He had me. Then he lost me. 
This is not how I want to be loved. 
“If spending the next few months without you means that I get to spend a lifetime with you, I can manage. I’ll do whatever I have to.  But don’t think for a second that there is anyone else on this entire fucking planet meant for you.”
That’s how I want to be loved. Too little too late.
I drop the ring.
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brnesblogposts · 2 months
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3am kitchen meetings with bucky
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pairing bucky barnes x reader
words600
warnings none!
3AM. you could not sleep no matter how hard you tried, you had a lot on your mind lately which was not helping. at 3:02 you finally gave in and got up, maybe a cup of hot chocolate might help you sleep.
after putting the hot chocolate in the microwave, you scavenged through the cupboards to find some snacks. a bag of doritos caught your eye and you put them in a bowl.
you screamed a little too loud when you saw someone out of the corner of your eye standing in the dim light,
"BUCKY WHAT THE HELL" you whisper shouted.
"i didn't meant to scare you, doll. what are you doing up at this hour anyway?" he asked inquisitively,
"couldn't sleep. what about you?"
"same here." he shrugged.
"nightmare?" you asked sympathetically,
"mhm"
poor bucky was always having nightmares, you felt sorry for him. he was getting better though, the therapy and shuri's technology was working.
"do you want to join me and watch a movie?" you inquired and be nodded. you both made your way to the living room, he had grabbed the doritos and you had your hot chocolate. when you sat on the couch you noticed he was pretty far away from you so you patted the seat next to you.
"buck," you gave him the best puppy eyes you had and to your surprise they worked. he scooted over to where your thighs were almost touching, it made you feel safe, you liked it.
"what do you wanna watch?" you asked with curiosity,
"whatever you want, doll'" he gave a weak smile.
you had decided on a cheesy romcom, how could anyone dislike them? it was called "what's your number", you sipped on your hot chocolate and ate your doritos.
about halfway through you felt your eyes growing heavy and your head falling. you didn't notice but your head landed on buckys shoulder, your hand still in the bowl of doritos.
bucky didn't know what to do in this situation, he moved the bowl away and set it on the table, trying not to wake you in the process. he looked at you and his gaze softened. he didn't know whether to move you to your room or leave you, you looked peaceful and he didn't want to ruin that.
he put a blanket over you and at some point you'd moved your head into his lap? he had drifted off lightly not noticing.
bucky noticed he felt safe and comfortable with you lying on him, but it was almost 5am so he decided it was best to move you to your room before anyone else woke up which would ultimately disturb you.
he picked you up gently, you stirred a little and he froze but you soon settled back down, he carried you to your room. he soaked in the moment for just a second before he lay you on your bed and put the covers over you.
bucky turned on his heel to leave but was stopped by a hand grabbing his wrist,
"no, stay" is all you said with your eyes still closed.
bucky was perplexed, he thought of it as a one time thing so he lay on the other side of the bed on top of the covers and you held onto him as you slept.
at some point in the early hours of the morning bucky ended up under the covers with you, holding you towards his chest.
it was the best nights sleep he'd had in years.
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Text
Dad headcanons | Leon S. Kennedy
warnings: pregnancy
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I picture Leon being in absolute bliss when you break the news to him. He’ll be laughing while hugging you. He’s never had a normal family, and I believe he would want children of his own. He’ll be so happy he won’t be able to erase a dumb smile from his face for the rest of the day.
Reads lots of articles on parenting and baby development.
A worrywart. One day several noises woke you up late at night and you discovered your husband babyproofing everything in the house. Turns out he was so worried he couldn’t wait til’ the morning.
You have to be very careful about mentioning your cravings because this man is driving in the middle of the storm if that means getting what you want. You’ll have to physically stop him from going out at ungodly hours just because you crave some donuts.
If it were up to him, you wouldn’t even get out of bed. He has to be holding your hand when you use stairs, no matter how many times you’ve tried to convince him you are totally capable of doing it alone.
“What’s next? I’m not allowed to use scissors?”
Your laugh slowly quietens as you notice Leon’s thinking face.
“... I don’t see why you would have to use scissors”
One day he came home with a big present box and when you opened it a german shepherd jumped at you. He got a trained police dog to keep you company. (Not before making extensive research on the best family dogs, of course).
On top of that, he would want to hire someone to help around the house because the thought of you being alone makes him worried sick.
He’s so silly. Talks to your belly all the time. When he comes home he always greets you with “how are my babies doing?”
He goes crazy with baby stuff. Clothes, plushies, bottles, toys, everything he sees in stores ends up in the baby room. The room is so full of stuff you two had to keep some things in the attic. He has promised to stop buying things several times but there’s always something that catches his eye and he has to get it.
“And this is a baby monitor— I know that face, you don’t like it”
“No, I love it, it’s just…”
“Yes?”
“You already bought one of those, love”
“Aha! No, I bought a different one. Now, you see, the one we had doesn’t had all the features this one has…”
Strikes me as the kind of guy who would want to wait a bit before telling people about the pregnancy… However, he ends up spilling the beans two or three times. Also, people kinda catch onto it because all he talks about is about children’s development.
Sometimes you wake up at night to find your lover lying awake, watching at the ceiling. Truth is, he can’t help but worry about your child’s future and spends hours thinking about it; but when you ask him what’s keeping him up, he always answers that the excitement of becoming a dad won’t let him sleep.
Will do the impossible in order to be with you during the delivery. He has warned his superiors months in advance that he needs to rest during the days when is probable the baby is coming. In the worst case scenario, where he isn’t able to make it in time, he is gonna be regretful for a very long time.
Definitely cries the first time he holds his baby.
He randomly wakes up at night and goes to check the baby. He’ll sit in front of the crib and stay there for a while, sometimes he picks the baby up and just holds them. Will always give them a kiss on their forehead before leaving.
Converses with the baby. He could be feeding them, or changing their diaper, and he talks to them as if they could understand him. Tells them about his day, how work is going. If you two were ever to argue (which is very rare and, if you do, always with a certain joke air), he is bringing the baby and puts them on his side. He looks at the baby and asks “can you believe this?”
You’ve found him watching baby cartoons not noticing the child is long asleep.
He is beyond cheerful because everytime you are carrying the baby, they raise their tiny arms to his dad wanting to be held by him.
Asks Claire to babysit whenever you two go out on dates.
Which he later regrets because now, everytime the baby sees Claire, they reach out for her. Even if Leon is carrying them. Makes him a bit jealous.
Your baby walks and talks very early on because of how much time Leon spends with them.
Every parent believes their kid is exceptional, but Leon could win the proudest dad competition. As your child grows up, Leon is so amazed by every milestone they complete. “I’m telling you, this child is going places”, he tells you the day your baby learns to roll over.
You mentioned to him once how cute you thought albums were, so now you two keep one for your kid. He takes terrible photos, but you think those are very adorable and keep them in the album.
Takes playtime seriously. He isn’t like those parents who don’t even care about what’s happening and leave at the middle of the game. Tea party? He is wearing his best clothes. Pretending to be spies? Won’t break character. He will be bashful if you catch him tho.
He has this ongoing thing with your child where they try to build the biggest sandcastle everytime you go to the beach.
He always says ‘I love you’ when saying goodbye. Once your child hurriedly kissed his cheek and pretended to leave, but Leon stopped them and said: “Everytime I tell you I love you, I mean it, it’s not just mindless words. Do you mean it?” He knows that, and god forbids it happens, he could not come back home one day. So it’s crucial for him for his child to understand how much he loves them.
It breaks his heart to leave his family so often. On one occasion he overheard your child begging you to talk to their father and ask him to please stop going on missions.
I picture him having a daughter.
The kind of man who takes his daughter to dates. Everytime he brings you flowers, he has another bouquet for his princess.
Your daughter is a performer. She makes up dances and songs and performs in front of you two.
Once, when she was young, she told him she wanted to marry him. He answered he couldn’t marry her because he is already married to you, to which your girl replied “Can I marry uncle Chris then?” Leon hasn’t recovered from that.
Maybe a bit delusional but you two invite over his D.S.O friends for Christmas, Claire and Chris included, and everyone brings a present for your daughter.
He’d like more than one kid, but often worries about what would happen to his family if he ever goes missing, so for now, another one isn’t in the plans.
Lying by your side at night, he sometimes thanks you for the opportunity to have a family.
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cutielando · 5 months
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beach ~ rafe cameron
my masterlist
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"Are you done?" you asked Rafe for the 10th time, tapping your foot against the floor impatiently.
"Yeah" he said and exited the bathroom, chuckling at your stance.
You had strict plans to get to the beach at 11 with all of your friends, and it was already 11:30 and Rafe was being a pain in the ass as usual.
"We're already late, Rafe. Come on" you never liked being late, but you've had to deal with it ever since you and Rafe started dating.
It didn't matter how early he woke up to get ready, he could never do it on time and you always ended up being at least half an hour late to everything.
"It's not like the beach won't still be there when we arrive. Babe, can you please just calm down?" he asked once he finally walked out of the bathroom fully dressed and ready to go.
"You know I don't like being late" you mumbled and crossed your arms over your chest, pouting like a child whose candy had been stolen.
"I know. I'm sorry. Let's go, I'm ready" he kissed your pouting lips and grabbed your hand, taking your bag in his other hand.
The drive to the beach was fairly short, which didn't give you guys much time for a conversation to arise.
When you got there, you saw all of your friends already there, some of them sunbathing while the others were either swimming or playing voleyball.
"Look who finally decided to show up" Topper yelled once he saw you two approaching them.
"Don't look at me, look at him" you said and motioned to Rafe with your head.
You saw him shrug out of the corner of your eye as you started laying out your towels on the warm sand.
You put yours under the umbrella because you didn't really feel like being in the sun today.
Rafe immediately laid down on his towel, putting on his sunglasses and closing his eyes.
"Don't tell me you're going to sleep. You just got here" Kelce commented, making Rafe flip him off.
"We were busy last night" the comment rolled off his tongue effortlessly.
Your cheeks were bright red, thanfully nobody seemed to notice a difference.
"Sit up for a second so I can put some sunscreen on you" you bent down and whispered in Rafe's ear, who obliged without saying anything.
He sat up without saying anything, allowing you to rub sunscreen on his toned back. After you were done, you pressed a kiss on his head, which was now rested on your leg.
"Comfy?" you asked, smiling as you started running your hand through his soft hair.
"Very. You mind if I take a nap?" his voice was muffled by your leg, but you managed to understand him.
"No, I don't feel like going in the water or doing anything anyway" you said, laying down and getting comfortable.
After not even a minute, you felt Rafe move and found yourself laying down with him on top of you, his head resting against your chest.
You didn't say anything and instead started running your hand up and down his back, caressing it with the tips of your nails, something you knew he absolutely loved.
"Y/N, how have you been?" the voice of your friend made your head snap to the left.
You went on to talk to your friend for about an hour while Rafe slept. He didn't move from his position, far too comfortable while laying on top of you to move even an inch.
♡♡♡♡♡
"Good morning, sleeping beauty" you teased Rafe once he finally opened his eyes and lifted his head from your chest.
He groaned and put his head back on your chest, trying to snuggle even further into your body.
"Noo, I wanna go for a swim" you tried to push him off of you, but he was way too strong.
"But I wanna stay here with you" he complained, sounding like a small child.
"We can go in the water together. You get to see me in my bikini all wet" you lowered your voice to a whisper, knowing it would get Rafe to let go of you.
Just as predicted, he immediately got up and took your hands in his, helping you stand up.
You pulled your dress over your head, leaving you in only your sexy new bikini.
"Damn, woman" Rafe said and whistled as he looked you up and down.
You blushed, still not used to getting compliments from Rafe.
Before you could say anything, he took your hand and you walked together towards the water.
"It's so cold" you gasped once the water hit your feet.
"It's not that cold" he commented, not seeming even the slightest bit affected by the cold water.
"Of course you don't feel it, you shower with water colder than ice every single day" you walked a couple more steps, the water now almost at your knees.
Rafe picked you up and held you bridal style, walking further into the ocean.
"Don't you dare drop me, Rafe. I swear to all that is holy-" you were holding him tightly by the neck.
"It's just a little water. You're not going to get used to it if you don't just jump in" he explained, pretending to drop you.
You squealed and held tighter onto him while he just laughed.
"Raaafe" you whined, looking down at the water like it was your worst enemy.
"Ready? 3, 2, 1..." he threw you in and you landed in the ice cold water, immediately coming to the surface.
He jumped in right after you, swimming a little further away before coming back to you.
"See? Was that so bad?" he asked and wrapped his arms around your waist, gluing your body to his.
"That was not nice" you pouted, sticking out your bottom lip.
Rafe leaned up and pressed a kiss on it, smiling up at you like an innocent child.
The moment was so serene, just the two of you and the ocean. Your friends were up on the beach, not paying attention to what you were doing. It was perfect.
...until the Pogues decided to show up.
Specifically, until JJ came.
"Is that Y/N?" you heard his voice shout at his friends from a distance, making you stiffen.
Whenever there was JJ there was also trouble, especially if Rafe was there.
"Fucking Pogues" you murmured under your breath, still locked in Rafe's arms.
"We can never fucking escape them" Rafe chuckled sarcastically, looking at them over your shoulder.
"Please promise me you're not going to fight with them. Please" you whispered and rested your forehead on his, bringing up a hand to hold his cheek.
He sighed and thought for a moment before nodding and pecking your lips.
"Let's go home, it's getting late anyway" you said and he nodded once again, reaching down to take your hand.
You walked out of the water and held Rafe's hand, looking around to make sure the Pogues didn't get near you.
"Hey, Y/N!" JJ's voice made you stop in your tracks.
"What do you want?" you kept your tone as icy as possible, hoping he would get the hint that you didn't want to talk to him.
"Why so tense? Kook Prince here not treating you right or something?" he laughed, finding everything he was saying so funny.
"Must be so hard knowing that it's not you who gets to treat her, isn't it?" Rafe said, standing directly behind you and wrapping an arm around your waist.
You put your hand over his, holding it in place. He was awfully calm right now, which you took as a good sign.
"We both know she's gonna realize sooner or later that you're just a piece of shit and it's not gonna take long for her to come crawling to me" his smirk was like the devil's, thinking he was so much more superior than you guys.
Rafe laughed at that, almost making you crack a smile, but you didn't want to give JJ the satisfaction.
"Let's go" you said and took back Rafe's hand, walking towards your towels.
You quickly packed everything in your bag and saw Rafe waiting patiently for you, ignoring everything else JJ was shouting.
He took your hand and started walking away from the beach and to your car, holding it tightly.
"Thank you" you whispered once you reached your car.
"For what?" he was confused.
"Not giving in and picking a fight with him. You kept your cool and your promise" you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer to you.
Your back hit the side of his car, making you gasp.
"You asked me to, so I did it. It's the least I could do to show you how much I love you and want you to feel safe with me" he explained, reaching up to put a strand of your hair behind your ear.
"I love you too. So much" you leaned up and kissed his lips passionately, pouring in every emotion you felt.
Even though the day didn't end like you wanted it to, you were still glad you got to spend quality time with your boyfriend at the beach.
Your two most favorite things.
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lumi-nescentt · 5 months
Text
Heaven Is A Place On Earth With You
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Pairing: Max Verstappen x Reader
Warnings: slight sexual joke at some point
Words: 1.8k
Summary: The Max everyone knows is a lot different from the Max he is behind closed doors. That's even truer when he hasn't seen you in a while and all he wants is to spend time doing nothing with his girl.
A/N: I'm procrastinating for my finals so I'm going to try to finish all the WIP I currently have :) hope you like max being hopelessly in love bc that's what you're getting here
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Max was known for being blunt, sometimes rough which on track made him almost unstoppable. However, the Max you knew was way different. He treated you with such care and delicacy, it was sickeningly sweet. From the moment you two had started dating, he had done his best to show you that he wasn't what the rest of the world portrayed him to be. That he was worthy of the affection you felt for him.
Slow mornings with Max were your favourite moments. He always woke up before you but he never dared to leave the bed before you wanted to. He didn’t particularly liked laying around but there was something about being close to you that made him want to stay there forever. You looked so peaceful cuddled up against him, he wouldn’t have dared to wake you up anyway. He much preferred admiring you until you woke up and he could finally talk to you.
When your eyes started fluttering awake, the first thing you were aware of was the arm around your waist. Max's hand was on your naked back, keeping you as close to him as possible. The weight of it was comforting and it was always the first thing you noticed when he came back late at night while you were already asleep, from races you couldn’t have gone to. You liked knowing that even when he was exhausted from all the travelling, he still took the time to nestle your body against his before falling asleep with you between his arms. 
As soon as he realised you were awake, Max started peppering the side of your face with kisses which made you giggle and look up at him. There was something really special about the look you gave your boyfriend when you were slowly coming back to reality that he loved. It always looked as if you were falling back in love with him all over again in a matter of seconds. You had the softest look on your face and as far as heart eyes went, yours were probably the most intense someone ever had until Max looked at you with the same intensity and his entire face lit up, his eyes twinkling with pure adoration before he broke the silence and finally spoke.
-" Good morning schatje" he greeted you with a kiss on your forehead
-" Hi Maxie" you mumbled, still sleepy
-" Did you sleep well ?"
-" I alway sleep well when you're here so yes. How about you ?"
-" Great, I had the best human heater next to me."
-" Do you have anything planned today ?"
-" Nope, I'm all yours. Did you want to do anything special ?"
-" Just wanted to stay with you."
-" Do you want me to make breakfast and then we can go walk on the beach ?"
-" That sounds good."
-" Lets go then." Max said, trying to stand up from the bed but you had moved your body half on top of him
-" Schatje, if you want breakfast you're gonna have to get off me."
-" I thought you liked me on top ?" you winked, making the Dutch man blush
-" I do but I also like you alive and well fed so hop off please."
With a groan, you turned on your side, liberating Max who stood up. He tried to convince you to follow him in the kitchen but you needed a few more minutes so after kissing your forehead, Max went to cook breakfast alone. He didn’t mind doing it on his own. Taking care of you when he was here was one of his favourite things to do just to see you smile at him and have you kiss his cheek as a thank you. It was all worth it for your reaction alone. 
Five minutes later, Max felt a pair of arms snake around his waist and your face pressing against his back. He still hadn’t put a shirt back on after sleeping in boxers all night. He never wore much to bed since you were always warm enough for him to sleep almost naked and not freeze. So when you pressed small kisses against his shoulder blades, he almost let go of the coffee cup he was holding, your breath tickling his skin. 
-“ Behave please, schatje.” Max smiled, patting your hands that were resting on his stomach
-“ ‘m not doing anything.” you answered, tightening your grip around him
-“ Not yet but I know you might try something so if you want to eat decent food please wait until I set everything on the table.” 
-“ Can’t promise anything.” Max laughed at your answer before going back to what he was doing. 
Since you had moved in with him, Max found out that he actually didn’t hate slowing down for a bit and enjoying the little things. He just never had someone he loved to do it with until you came along. Now, he loved just hanging around in the apartment, bodies dancing around each other in the kitchen when you were both doing your own thing but still enjoying each other’s presence. He found solace in doing the most mundane things with you. He wouldn’t dare to say it out loud but as long as you were together, everything felt like an adventure. 
Enjoying breakfast together while looking out the balcony was a great way to start the day according to him, maybe even his favourite. You were apparently in a good mood too judging by how playful you were being, stealing bits from his plate with a grin and teasingly nudging his shoulder with yours. If it had been anyone else, Max would have protested a little but there was not much he would get angry at you for so he let it slide, stealing something back for good measure. 
He could have completely forgotten about the walk on the beach he had promised if you hadn’t rushed to get ready as soon as you had finished eating. He followed you with a laugh, trying not to blush at the sight of you in a pretty sundress with your hair falling down your shoulders. You looked radiant with joy and it suited you all too well. Max was glad his actions made you feel this way. In fact, he wasn’t just glad, no. Max was proud to be able to make you happy in a way no one else did because if at first he hadn’t thought himself capable of fully giving you the love he thought you deserved, he now knew that you wanted whatever he was willing and capable of giving you. 
You were more than content with the amount of love you received from your boyfriend and you made sure to make it known and to return the attention because despite his tough exterior, you had been around the Dutchman for long enough to know that there was nothing that touched him more than being loved openly and freely, without conditions. 
The car ride to the beach was spent in comfortable silence, Max’s hand on your thigh as you looked out the window, feeling the wind caress your face. Max tried to steal a few glances your way while he drove but his eyes never stayed long. He was way too careful when he was the one responsible for your well-being. You had tried teasing him about it to make him relax but he was adamant that as your boyfriend, he had to make sure you were as safe as possible. 
You couldn’t really argue with that so you let him be, knowing that as soon as he’d be done driving, you’d be able to play around again. So the moment the car was finally parked, you were bolting out the door, screaming that the last one in the water would be a terrible loser. It didn’t take long for Max’s brain to compute but by the time he started running, you already had a good lead.
However, you hadn’t considered the fact your boyfriend was a literal athlete and that his cardio was considerably better than yours. Before you could even reach the water, Max had catched up to you and effortlessly picked you up, still going towards the sea with a grin on his face. 
-“ Please Max, put me down. Don’t throw me in.” you screeched as he kept jogging lightly
-“ You should have thought about that when you cheated, you little minx.” Max responded, poking your side with his finger as you laughed 
-“ But I had to, otherwise I had no chance of winning. You’re too quick for me, Mr. World Champion” 
-“ Flattery won’t get you anywhere now, schatje. It’s too late”. Max smirked before dropping you in the water, jumping right behind you as you swam further away, your boyfriend close behind
-“ I hate you so much.” you lied, wrapping your arms around his neck, trying your best to swim at the same time before Max wrapped your legs around his waist, bringing you even closer
-“ For the record, I might have let you win if you hadn’t cheated or made me watch you undress and run at the same time.” the Dutchman smiled, pecking your lips 
-“ Who said I lost ?” 
-“ You were the first one in the water, baby. That makes you the loser of your own game.” 
-“ Maybe it was my plan all along…”
-“ y/n, you’re the sorest loser I know. There’s no way you’d plan to lose.”
-“ Well, I don’t care. I’m in your arms right now and we’re at this beautiful empty beach. I intend to make the most of this situation I definitely planned for and kiss you until you get sick of it.”
-“ Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night.” Max chuckled, his whole face lighting up “ We’re going to be here for a while then because I don’t think I could ever get tired of kissing you.”  
-“ Alright then, the first one to stop is a terrible loser.” you smiled with a toothy grin
-“ Schat… Are you sure you can handle another loss today ?” 
-“ Bring it on, lover boy. Less talking, more kissing.”
-“ You don’t have to ask me twice.” he mumbled before pressing his lips against yours, brushing your wet hair away from your face
Maybe you lost the first game but when a family arrived at the beach and their little boy somehow recognised your boyfriend from afar and practically screamed that Max Verstappen was here, Max had to let you go. He wasn’t a fan of PDA, even less when it was around fans but in that moment, he wished he was just to erase the smug grin on your face when he lost the stupid challenge you had set. 
Before heading over to see the boy, Max made sure to peck your lips. He bit your lower lip slightly, not missing the way your face flushed when he did before asking for a rematch when you were back home. You already loved how the day had started but now you were sure that the rest of it would be just as good, if not better. This was just another thing to add to the list of why being home together was your favourite place to be.
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blue-jisungs · 7 months
Text
complete opposite
author's note. here it goes,, finally finished it after having it rot in my drafts for a month grrrrr … also, this one is for the biggest joshu stans i know, @fairyhaos and @slytherinshua <3
summary. you get scared of how joshua will react to bad news, joshua gets scared of how you’re acting… turns out is all a complete opposite of the other one was thinking
genre. fluff but also kinda angst? hurt to comfort me thinks
word count. 2269 hehe
warnings. swearing, mention of throwing up, feeling sick, having intimate relations with joshua but nothing explicit!! reader is overthinking a lot :(
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heart thumping in your chest, you stared at your friend in disbelief. rina squeezed your hand and tucked a hair that has fallen on your face.
“i’ll drive you home, okay?” she hummed and stood up, placing a peck on your forehead “stay here”
you nodded weakily, your stomach going crazy. you watched her silhouette disappear and massaged your temples.
when you woke up today, joshua was already gone. he texted you good morning and informed that he’ll probably come home late at night. but then you felt unwell. ignoring it, you decided to eat breakfast and go to work.
which was a mistake. you barely arrived and already run to the toilet, returning your stomach’s contents. rina was already here so she helped you, handing you some water and meds. just when you thought you’re fine, mid-convo with a customer you turned pale again and your stomach was making turns and somersaults.
you bet it was the fish you ate yesterday. you were out with joshu to some kind of a fancy restaurant. lately you’ve been craving fish so you decided, why not. well apparently it wasn’t a great idea.
“okay, let’s go. just please try not to vomit all over my car” rina giggled and helped you stand up. you felt weak, beads of sweat forming on your forehead. rina bit her lip and led you to her car. “i need to pick up one thing on the way but maybe try taking a nap? should i call your boyfriend?”
“no, no. he’s really busy today” you sighed, secretly wishing he’d be there for you.
in no time you were home, rina walking you to the door. suddenly she handed you a few boxes of… pregnancy tests.
“what…” you laughed, looking at her shocked.
“you… look, i need to go back to work but my sister was pregnant a while ago. and her symptoms were similar. and your period is running late, isn’t it? you still haven’t eaten the chocolate from the cabinet at work” rina said softly, looking at your widened eyes “just… make sure. and call me, okay? if you feel worse or better, doesn’t matter. i’ll pick up whenever i can”
“i… you’re being a bit dramatic with the tests. but thank you. i owe you” you smiled. she nodded and gave you a quick hug before rushing back to work.
you entered your and joshua’s apartment, heart wild in your chest. sure, your period was late. but… no, that’s not right.
feeling a unpleasant sensation bubbling up in your throat once again, head spinning, you ran to the bathroom. throwing the boxes on the counter you accidentally knocked some things over. you knelt down and for another time this day, threw up.
taking deep breaths you weakly grabbed the pink box. scanning the stupid imagine of a stupid woman with a stupid baby bump you decided to try. what’s the worse thing that could happen anyways. you’re not pregnant, it’s just the fish. you and joshua always use protection and you’re always safe. right?
you paced around the bathroom, nervously putting away stuff in different places while waiting for the outcome. it’s not it. can’t be. logically – can’t be. physically–
you peeked at the stick.
two lines.
“fuck”
your heart thumped in your chest, ready to rip out from your rib cage and go for a walk. or jog.
“no, it’s not right…”
you spent half of the day testing the other pregnancy tests. because what if it’s just a malfunction? or if one brand has two lines for positive and the other for negative? you had to be sure.
and sure you were when all of them turned out to be positive.
your bathroom looked like war zone, everything turned upside down all over the place.
walking into the kitchen on wobbly legs, your head felt like it was about to explode.
you’re pregnant.
joshua is going to kill you. well, no. not really. but it will kill him.
you never talked about it. sure, he said he wanted to marry you one day but… but he’s an idol. he’s busy. maybe he doesn’t even want kids?
when some rumours floated around about your relationship… it killed him. some carats went crazy, not in a positive way. joshua was really going through it and now… relationship is not as a big of a problem as pregnancy. oh my god, carats are going to kill you. and the baby.
you don’t want to ruin his career. he worked so hard and loved what he did and now… now it’s about to fall apart like a house of cards triggered by a slight gust of wind.
tears dwelled in your eyes, throat tightening. joshua will hate you, that’s for sure. yes, he loved you but a kid… those are different circumstances, choices… way of living.
he will hate you and dump you. that’s for sure.
unless… unless you do it first.
no.
be rational.
he won’t, right?
the room felt like it was about to swallow you. all the pictures with joshua, your joshu. his ebony irises that you loved oh so much stared at you from the pictures. as if judging you.
you had to get out from here.
rushing to the bathroom, you tore all the boxes with the tests and flushed them down the toilet. then you threw all the tests into a plastic bag and then hid them under the sink. joshua never looks there. like that one time when you spent all day looking for something you lost and–
stop.
you took the keys and stormed out of your apartment, the need of fresh air almost suffocating you. you’ll be back before he gets home.
joshua pushed the door open, limbs feeling as if ready to fall apart any second. he just dreamed about changing his pyjamas and falling asleep in your arms.
it was late so he figured he won’t announce he’s here, like he always does. leaving his bag by the entrance, joshua stretched lazily.
he entered the bedroom and halted. the bed was empty.
“that’s weird…” he mumbled. maybe you’re in the bathroom? joshua grabbed his pyjama and decided to go check the bathroom.
if he was surprised that you weren’t in the bedroom, the bathroom left him speechless.
not only you weren’t there, like he thought you’d be. the room looked like a tornado passed through it.
everything was scattered around, as if knocked over; all over the place.
“y/n?” joshua called out, dropping the pyjamas. rushing to get his back to grab his phone, his throat went dry. it’s almost midnight and you’re not home. if you were going out with your girl friends, he’d know. he wouldn’t forget. so why you’re not home?
dialling your number, he noticed there’s no texts from you either. which was concerning too… you’d text him if you were going out somewhere. especially at this hour. and considering how cold it was…
the silence in the house was frightening. joshua didn’t like this one bit. suddenly he heard buzzing and his heart came up to his throat. your phone is home.
you left without taking your phone…?
joshua ran his hand through his hair. he has to stay calm.
he gulped and called your best friend from work. it was dumb, especially at this hour. but rina picked up immediately, even though voice w bit raspy and tired.
“hi joshua. is everything alright with y/n? i’ve been worried sick for the whole day–“ her voice was almost desperate for an answer.
“there was something wrong? i just came home and she’s not here… and, and she didn’t take her phone– i don’t know what’s happening” joshua whispered, feeling how his stomach drops.
“fuck”
“okay… okay… let’s stay calm. she… maybe she went to get some groceries?” rina breathed out “fuck, i shouldn’t leave her alone. is my fault… i…”
“hey, no, don’t say that. what even happened?” joshua asked and switched the light on. he’ll wait until you’re back. rina hesitated – if it was what she thinks it is, she doesn’t want to be the one passing the news.
“she felt unwell at work… and i drove her home but i had to go back… i should’ve stayed with her” rina mumbled.
suddenly there was a soft click of the door opening. joshua jolted, eyes turning into that direction.
you appeared in the doorway, your face catching his gaze. you were crying.
“rina, she’s here. don’t need to worry” he spoke softly. joshua noticed how scared you look. scared, tired and… guilty
“oh thank god. warn her that i’ll whoop her ass in work tomorrow” your grind let out a nervous laugh but she certainly sounded relieved “good night”
“good night” joshua whispered and hang up.
the silence was speaking volumes.
you slowly took off your shoes and sighed. opening your mouth to say something and then closing them again.
“if you wanted to go out, you should’ve taken a jacket” he said softly; there was no poisoned sarcasm in his voice, only genuine worry. you nodded weakly and played with your fingers.
“i…” your voice broke, eyes avoiding his.
joshua stood up and started boiling some water to mar you tea. you sat down on the couch, putting your bag close to you; hands gripping your knees.
for a moment it was peaceful, as if the world wasn’t about to fall apart in mere moments. just you, joshua and the sounds of boiling water.
in no time he returned, placing the cup on the table. then he looked at you, anxiety filling his heart.
“did something happen?” joshua asked. for the first time in ages he was unsure what to do. should he hold your hand? you didn’t look like you wanted to but on the other hand…
you shook your head gently, tears gathering at the edge of your waterline. your throat went dry and you felt like you weren’t able to physically speak out.
“i saw the bathroom, it looks like a mess. you scared me” he let out a soft chuckle, scanning your reaction.
nothing.
your fingers traced shapes absentmindedly on your knee, eyes distant.
“angel?” he asked, concern growing in his voice. only after you took a deep breather and let it out as a shaky sigh, you started. now or never.
“you’ll hate me” you mumbled and were met with a scoff. scared, you looked up at him. joshua was smiling softly, unaware of what he was about to learn.
“y/nnie, i’d never hate you” the smile wrinkles that you loved so much appeared around his eyes. your lip quivered and you looked away
“you will. i’m so… i’m sorry joshua” your voice cracked “i ruined your career”
“what are you talking about, silly?” joshua laughed nervously.
you just shook your head, tears beginning to roll down your cheeks. in a blink of an eye you started harshly sobbing, breathing getting hard to breathe.
joshua rushed and hugged you tightly, petting your hair. even though he hated that such thought crossed his mind, he couldn’t help but wonder what did you mean: did you cheat–
“i’m so fucking sorry” you whined, pulling away from him. then you reached to your bag and turned it upside down, causing its content to fall on the couch.
“what do you…” joshua’s voice died in his throat, your crying only getting more intense when you saw his reaction.
he reached to grab one of the white and pink sticks. two red lines.
then he looked at another one. two red lines.
the other one he grabbed has a blue plus drawn.
rummaging through all of them, mouth agape, he felt as if knocked the air out of his lungs.
no, not because you were pregnant (well, this too). because of your reaction. you thought he’ll hate you? that you ruined his career? that…
“oh y/n” his voice broke, grabbing your face in his hands. your quivering lip and wet eyelashes made his heart clench but it was hard for him to resist a smile “how could i… i’m…”
“i’m sorry! we never really talked about this before and… and i know that we’re not that young but your career is blooming and… and–“ you mumbled, voice becoming whiny and hard to control. why is he smiling, by the way…?
“y/n, please take a breath, okay?” he asked gently, caressing your wet cheeks “i would never have thought that… you’re going to panic thinking about my reaction”
you took a deep breath and blinked slowly. why; why in hell he’s so calm?! isn’t he going to–
“i’m going to be a father” he breathed out, his own eyes tearing up too “and you’ll be the mother, y/n. that’s… that’s something i could never dream of but i also always wanted…”
“w-what?” you asked and he shook his head, grinning with pearly tears blinking at the edge of his waterline.
“i love you so so much. i’m… speechless. and above all, so… so happy” he sniffled.
his reaction was… complete opposite of what you thought it would be. you felt as if a huge stone just dropped from your heart, relief washing over you. suddenly you put your hands on top of his and pulled him into a kiss.
lips connected and tears falling down your cheeks, joshua felt like all of this was unreal. pulling away, he rested his forehead against yours.
“i’ll be a dad” a faint whisper left his mouth as you wiped his cheek with a loving smile.
masterlist <3
taglist. @mirxzii ,, @primoppang ,, @l3visbby ,, @nicholasluvbot ,, @planetkiimchi ,, @weird-bookworm ,, @slytherinshua ,, @jiwuu ,, @laylasbunbunny ,, @dazzlingligth
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aleenuhs · 15 days
Note
Arthur comforting crying/ upset reader
𖦹 Always Here
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thank u anon <3
word count: 1,099
paring: Arthur x GN!reader
a lil bit of angst if u will.
You had accompanied Arthur, Charles, and Sadie on an outing to Saint Denis, to go play some poker at the Saloon.
Sadie had forced you to go, though you'd wanted to stay at camp finishing up your chores for the night.
But you went.
It was crowded and stuffy in the room, sitting across from the table they were playing at, eating some of the beef jerky you had in your pocket. A bit bored, you looked at the people in the room just watching, careful not to stare because people were easily offended by the gaze of another human being.
Arthur and the others were fully engrossed in their gameplay, which you'd opted out of cause you never understood it, or liked it for that matter. You wanted to go back to camp, not be here with a bunch of drunk men and working girls.
Your eyes fluttered, through all the noise, you somehow fell asleep for a bit.
When you woke back up, you were still sitting in the same chair. Surprisingly, you weren't robbed or anything bad.
You looked around the room again, spotting the table that Arthur, Charles and Sadie were once playing at, and they weren't there. Your heart rate immediately spiked, had they left without you?
You sprung up from the chair that you were sitting at and walked outside to see if they were out there, no clue where they'd went from the time you were awake, till now, not to mention, how long had you been asleep?
You walked around, in search for any of them, and no luck.
You knew Shady belle was within walking distance from where you were, but it was dangerous. And you didn't have your horse, so you couldn't ride back. The worst part was that they'd forgotten all about you, Sadie and Charles. But worst of all, Arthur had forgotten. It made you slightly angry that your own significant other would do such a thing. You walked up to a random person, who you saw had a pocket watch.
"Mister?" You spoke quietly, tapping him on the shoulder.
The man looked you up and down, before nodding.
"You know what time it is?"
"1:20."
Your eyes widened, "1:20, thank you." You repeated before walking off, damn it was late.
No stagecoaches were out at this time of night. What could you even do?
You walked around for a moment before you were met with a overwhelming urge to just walk all the way back to Shady Belle.
So you did. Holding yourself, as it was cold, you walked all the way back, shivering slightly. The tears left your eyes, but you didn't sob, no, they were silent tears.
When you arrived after 30 minutes of walking, you immediately walked into the house and went up to Arthurs room and stood before the bed, watching him sleep. he woke up to you. You looked wrecked, tear stained cheeks and bleary eyes, he could hardly see with just the small lantern lighting up the room.
He rubbed his eyes and sat up next to you. "Why aren't you in bed?" He asked, obliviously, maybe he was drunk.
You wanted to yell at him, but instead your words came out in a soft tone. "You left me, Arthur."
His eyes went back to their cold gaze. "Huh?"
"What is not to understand, Arthur? You left me at the saloon in Saint Denis!" Your words were more charged now, but not exactly yelling, just a bit more angry you felt.
"Jesus... Im sorry, I didn't mean to- er.. Leave you there darlin'." His eyes widening after he realized just what he had did. He gets up and puts his hands on your shoulders, and with this. You start to cry.
You don't even lift your head up to look at him, you play with your fingers.
His eyes fixed on how broken you looked, tears streaming down your face, he hardly knew what to do.
"I am so sorry." He speaks, almost silent. He brings you in, hugging you tightly, his big arms wrapped around you made you feel slightly better. But not entirely.
"I had to walk here, Arthur." You murmured.
His breath hitched. "Nobody... did anythin' to you, right?" He would curse himself if you said yes, but luckily, you shook your head. He sighed a breath of relief. "Good, but I truly am sorry, that I left you there, that we left you there."
You didn't respond, the tears still falling from your eyes. His warmth surrounds you, almost overheating your body. "Arthur promise me this won't happen again."
He looked at you, "I promise to try, I never intended for this to happen." He notices your lip trembling, he brings you even closer. "C'mere." He lays down on the bed signaling for you to join him there.
You hesitate for a moment, but end up laying right next to him, you nuzzled yourself right into his neck and sighed deeply. His calloused hand reached up to your face, fingers on your chin. "Look at me, darlin." He spoke softly, a difference in his voice, the voice that was usually brash and loud was somehow comforting you as you cried. "I love you, so much."
A smile reached your lips when he told you that. "I love you too."
"I will always be here for you, I can't believe I let myself do what I did back there." He admits. "I'm sure Sadie and Charles meant no harm by it as well."
You nod, knowing that there was no mailce behind this.
His hand runs up and down your back, soothing you, calming you down, taking away all your worries. He adjusted you, making sure that you were more than comfortable with him. He just held you.
At once, you were just sniffling, no more tears to shed. He had calmed you down, one of the only people who could.
He was truly the definition of duality, he could go from brutal to plain out kind and caring, and it was all for you. Everything he did, was for you, so you didn't have to worry. You could imagine that he was still constantly cursing himself now that he'd left you at the saloon, then walk all the way back to Shady Belle by yourself.
But now that you were safe in his arms, all those worries went away. "Shhh, shh. Rest, you can sleep now." He cooed, rubbing your neck and placing kisses on your forehead and nose.
You fell asleep shortly after.
a/n if u enjoyed it, smash the like and subscribe! jk, feel free to req more honey!
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spdrvyn · 1 month
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im begging for miguel x reader where he’s sick/tired/woke up from a nightmare and is in desperate need of shooting. so she takes care of him - pure domestic contentment- grooming him/washing/shaving/brushing hair/towel drying/changing clothes (and socks 🥺)/feeding him - doing everything to relax him and make him feel loved
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solace in your sweetness
summary: in the deep trenches of the night, miguel wakes up due to night terrors and you're very deadset on comforting him. no matter how many times he denies you that.
tags: hurt/comfort. very sweet and fluffy. reader isn't a spider-person. fem!reader.
notes: i love this request so so much, i have been ITCHING to do it. thank you so much for requesting, i hope you enjoy reading this one!
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Miguel didn't really have nightmares when he was younger. On the occasion that Gabe would bother him to watch a scary movie, there would be instances where he had them, but it wasn't a regular occurence. How naïve was he when he thought that he'd be able to leave those behind in his youth?
It started simple, he would be in the barren, empty streets of Nueva York. Before he would slowly watch every thing dissolve around him, glitch by glitch, pixel by pixel, unable to do anything but to just stand there, before he fell into the abyss and woke up.
The darkest part of his mind had always managed to make the scenario more horrifying, another time it was zombies, another time it was zombies again, but of only Gabriella. There was even a version where he was being chased by the other dead version of himself. He consulted many articles, read and bought a lot of books, and even tried meditating, but none of it worked so he just decided to live with it for a while. It wasn't like they happened every night, no big deal.
Though, it was a big deal to you. Which was his true fear, he didn't want you to fawn over something so trivial. He didn't want you to go out of your way to take care of him, despite how much it would fill the big, gaping hole in his heart.
So when he jolts awake from another night terror, he keeps himself as quiet as possible. He slowly looked over to the side of your bed, relieved to see that you were still in a peaceful sleep. He shifts silently and keeps his footsteps light as he makes his way over to the kitchen for some tea. The calming, minty aroma sweeped his senses, but it'd be better to work right now instead of relax.
He went back to the bedroom, setting the teacup down on the bedside before pulling out a small tablet. He winced as it opened, the brightness of it hurting his eyes even with glasses on. After lowering it, he immediately goes to rifle through his files.
That is until he felt the weight of your head on his shoulders, you looked up at him with a frown. "You're working."
"I am," Miguel spoke like he was caught with a hand in the cookie jar. As embarrassed as he was, it was too late. You should probably be going back to sleep, he remembered that you also had work early tomorrow. "I just got thirsty, go back to sleep, cariño."
A bald-faced lie, would you believe it or would you not? Your brows furrowed and your pout deepened, it made Miguel's palms sweat. Moments like these forced him to think if you really did have superpowers, there were too many instances where it seemed like you read his mind word for word.
"Why are you lying to me, Miguel?" Shock. It was his face, wasn't it? "Did you have any another nightmare? Why didn't you wake me up?"
Miguel's pride had shattered, you were too good at this. A little more and you'd be unmasking every single villain in the city. "You need to be up early, I just didn't want to ruin your beauty sleep." He closed his files and turned off his tablet, this was his fate now.
You all but groaned at his remark, kicking the bedsheets off of your body before stamping out of the bedroom. "Where are you-"
"Stay there, don't move an inch." He didn't want to incur God's wrath, so he obeys. Crossing his arms over his chest and leaning back against the pillows, his smell picked up on the scent of food being freshly cooked. He couldn't pinpoint exactly what it was, but by the lord, it smelled delicious.
Miguel was left there to wait for a while, this sort of reminded him of his younger days too, granted a lot more blissful. There were times when he was younger where Gabe had nightmares too, he'd come knocking on Miguel's door, asking if he could stay there for a while or if he could play video games with him.
To which Miguel would begrudgingly agree, but he normally tried to keep Gabe as uninterested in whatever they were doing as possible so that he could fall asleep already. This usually resulted in him falling asleep then Miguel having to sleep on the couch, but it was whatever. I mean, he only stopped doing that at the young age of 11.
So now being the one taken care of, it made Miguel feel like there was an outside force tipping the scales. After being a caretaker, one way or another, his whole life, having you step in and take him for a breather was like seeing a fish head on a lion's body.
You came back soon enough with a plate and spoon in hand, it was made clear to Miguel exactly what you were cooking. Tomato sauce with meatballs, you diced a small bit of the beef with the spoon before scooping some soup up, bringing it close to his mouth. "Ahhh,"
"I can eat on my—"
"Ahhhhh."
"For shock's sake—" he quickly took a bite, his eyes lit up as he swallowed. "It's good."
You smiled knowingly, finally allowing him to feed himself as you handed him the plate. "I know," then your expression hardened. "I'd like to talk to you about what you dreamt about, if that's okay with you." Miguel sighed, reaching over to the bedside to take a long sip of his tea.
His heart told him that it was perfectly fine for you to know about what was troubling him for so long now, but his mind, his rationale, told him to shut his trap about anything that could cause you any sort of worry or distress. When he doesn't respond to you after another moment, you lean in closer.
"Miguel, I'm always going to worry about you." You whispered, "That's just how I am, but it's because I love you. I love you so much that I can feel how much you're hurting even when you're trying to hide it from me."
"I love you too," he closed the gap to press a kiss to the crease on your forehead, you released a short breath. "I just- I don't know how to say it, I guess."
You placed a hand on his chest, "I can put the pieces together, I just want you to get this off your chest." He wished he had the ability to deny you, you're his weakness, especially when you bat your eyelashes and look at him so sweetly like you have all the love in the world to give.
He tells you as much as he can about his dream, it's all a mess. There were many parts that he wished he could just go back and erase, he didn't even want to go through with this idea in the first place. But you were so... understanding of him, it felt creepy. Not creepy, that wasn't the right word, but it was unsettling.
Being comforted by someone else always made Miguel feel like the other person had a 'holier than thou' attitude, that or he was horribly pitied to the point where he didn't want to keep opening up anymore. You carried none of those qualities, you simply nodded, listened in pure silence, but you'd chime in with some remarks every now and again. He doesn't know how he got so lucky with you.
You gave him some advice. Miguel's experiences were gut-wrenching which resulted to his night terrors, but you could share the sentiment. To some degree, at least. The advice was to just talk about it, letting that feeling build over time and dreading the next time you fall asleep would result to more casualties in the long run. And that if he had no other people to turn to, you were the first on his roster (granted he'd talk to you first anyway, but that's besides the point).
After putting away his empty plate, you joined him in bed again, it's probably still very late into the night, only three hours until you get up for work, but you didn't mind as long as you got to spend it with Miguel. However he wishes to.
The feeling of yours lips on his forehead, face nuzzled into his hair while your fingers drew shapes into his back.
The way he wrapped his arms around your hips, slotting one of his legs in between yours, and the sound of your heartbeat.
He falls into a blissful sleep, knowing you will protect him from the horrors that lurk in the shadows. For once in his life, Miguel has been taken care of and he's so glad that it's you.
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blueicequeen19 · 11 months
Text
Good or Bad?
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Warnings: oral, unprotected outdoor sex,
The last thing you wanted to do was ask JJ Maybank for help. You’d had a crush on him forever and everyone knew it. Your friends teased you. His friends teased you. All while JJ paid attention to everyone but you. But now it was the middle of the night and you were stranded. He was the only one who answered and you knew he could tow your car. Maybe even fix it. So you swallowed your pride and tried to calm your racing heart as he backed his truck up to your car. You hated how effortlessly sexy he was while backing up the trailer, his eyes narrowed in concentration before jumping out.
“You okay?” JJ asks, his voice still gruff with sleep and instantly making him ten times sexier.
“Yes. Thank you for helping me. I tried everyone. I’m sorry I woke you.” You couldn’t help but ramble even when he smirked, flipping his hat backwards.
“It’s fine. I’ll always help a damsel in distress.” JJ smiles, that damn dimple making your knees weak as he hooks chains to the front of your car.
“What are you doing all the way out here anyway? There’s nothing out her but Baseheads.” JJ raises a blonde brow at you before moving to your drivers side to throw the car in neutral.
“I was uh—, meeting someone. It ended up being a mistake.” You shrug, keeping your eyes down so he doesn’t see your humiliation. JJ stays quiet which is somehow worse. He manages to load your small car on his trailer with no help and very little sweat. Who knew watching a man doing a little work was so hot?
“So, who were you seeing?” JJ finally asks, turning to put his back against his truck and crossing his arms. You tried not to gawk at all the muscles he had on display in his cutoff. Even his forearms were sexy.
“It doesn’t matter. He was seeing someone else apparently.” You chuckle nervously, feeling your face heat In humiliation.
“It matters.” JJ says, keeping his blue eyes trained on you. “Was it Barry?”
You don’t answer and JJ nods, his jaw clenching for just a moment.
“You’re better off, sweetheart.” JJ finally says, his voice losing its edge, like he needed a moment to cool down.
“Well options are limited on the island. It was just going to be sex anyway. Nothing serious.” You swallow the lump that forms in your throat, hoping he doesn’t view you as some sort of slut but who didn’t enjoy sex? He chuckles, stroking his chin for a moment as his eyes start to drink you in. You were hot everywhere under his gaze. Like he was undressing you with his eyes.
“You’re not a ‘nothing serious’ type of girl.” JJ steps forward, taking your hand and pulling you closer to him.
“What’s that supposed to mean? You don’t think I can do casual?” Your tone is light as you smirk nervously back at him. His hands in yours making it hard to breathe or think.
“No I don’t. You’re the marrying type. You need something serious. Something real. You’re not going to find it with Barry. You’re a good girl, Y/N.” Your heart nearly bursts in your chest, your hands starting to shake in his.
“I’m not always a good girl.” You whisper, watching the way his eyes darken and he licks his lips.
“And how does a good girl pay someone back for a late night tow?” JJ rasps, pulling you closer until your chests are almost flush.
“Probably not the same way a bad girl does.” Your hand slips from his to grab his belt loop. JJ swallows, casting his eyes down to watch your movements. Your free hand pops the button on his shorts and the sound of his uneven breathing makes you shiver.
You can’t stop yourself from reaching up on your toes to kiss him. You both groan before his tongue dives in your mouth, his hand slipping into your hair to bring you closer. You slip your hand inside his shorts and cup his hard cock through his boxers, making him jerk. Youre not sure where the sudden courage comes from but you can’t stop yourself from slipping your hand in his boxers and you both groan as you wrap your hand around the warm flesh.
“Fuck.” JJ bites out between kisses, one of his hands finding your ass as his kisses grow hungrier.
“You wanna suck me off?” JJ rasps, making your thighs clench as your clit throbs with need. You lick your lips as you nod, pulling him free of his shorts.
Moisture pooled in your panties as you kissed him again before lowering to your knees. JJ curses, his lips parted as he pants, unable to take his eyes off you. You pull your tits free of your tank top, making him groan before wrapping your hand around his throbbing length and swiping your tongue over the weeping tip.
“Shit.” JJ hisses through his teeth, threading his fingers through your hair and guiding his cock past your lips. His gasps of pleasure nearly drive you insane as you suck him slowly, stroking the underneath of his shaft with your tongue. You weren’t sure who this bold person was that he brought out of you but you were determined to see it through. You wanted this to be as memorable for him as it would be for you.
You wrap your hands around what won’t fit your mouth, stroking and twisting your hands until he’s lifting up on his toes and moaning into the night. Saliva slips from the corners of your mouth and your jaw aches but you refuse to stop, even if it meant not getting yours. You loved this fantasy of paying him back with a blowjob. You loved the idea of being bad for him.
“God, I’m gonna cum.” JJ groans before tugging free of your skillful mouth and yanking you to your feet. Your legs nearly buckled, the throbbing between your thighs so intense it hurt.
“I wasn’t done.” You whine, reaching down to stroke him with your hand. His nostrils flare as he fists your hair, bringing you in for a hard kiss.
“If you don’t stop I’m going to fuck you in the dirt.” JJ growls, spinning you around and forcing you to bend over the trailer tire. He yanks your shorts down, the cool air meeting the slick between your thighs and causing you to shudder.
“Look at the mess you’ve made. Sucking my cock make you wet, baby?” JJ groans, lowering himself behind you and swiping his tongue through your slit. You moan loudly, your fingers digging into the metal of the trailer while he savors your taste like a delicious treat.
“J.” You breathe, your thighs starting to shake as he feasts. Your orgasm begins to crest, your toes starting to curl when he stops abruptly and shoves his cock inside your pulsing pussy. You practically scream with relief, his hand twisting in the back of your top to hold you in place as he fucks you like a mad man.
You wonder briefly if he bothered to put a condom on but you quickly shake it off. You didn’t care. You wanted him and you wanted his cum.
“I heard you had a crush on me. That true?” JJ grunts with every powerful thrust, making you see more than the stars above you.
“Yes.” You whine, arching your back and pushing your ass back to meet his movements. You were so close you could taste it.
“Yea? So you hoped this would happen when you called me?”
“Yes!”
“Good girl.” JJ’s fingers find your clit and you cum with a cry, your eyes rolling back into your head as he slams into you harder and harder.
“Fuck, I hope you’re on something.” JJ bites out, fucking you so hard your teeth rattle until finally he stills, making your insides instantly warm as he releases deep inside your pussy.
A moment passes as you both try to catch your breath, his hold on you being the old thing keeping you upright. He finally pulls out and you both groan, his cum instantly starting to drip from you.
“That’s so hot.” JJ groans, scooping up his release with his fingers and pushing it back inside you.
“Consider your debt paid, sweetheart. Call me anytime.”
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yourmomxx · 9 months
Text
car’s outside (but I don’t wanna go tonight)
sam winchester x reader
summary: sam feels bad because he’s always away on hunts. you reassure him
warnings: angst, fluff, insecure sam
word count: 1.3k
requested by @fuiabarcelos
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Sam came home when the hand of the clock showed way past midnight. You would like to say you noticed, but you didn’t. Like every other night, you had waited up until late for your boyfriend to return, but as much as you missed him, you had to fall asleep at some point.
Sam was quiet when he entered the bedroom. For a moment, when he saw you, he just froze and leaned against the threshold. The lack of moonlight was no obstacle for him to make out your figure under the bedsheets, curled up toward his side of the bed, leaving space as if he was there.
Sam was careful when he lifted the covers and slid under them, like a silent breeze drifting through a window.
He shuffled closer to the warmth of your body, wrapping one arm around you. In sleep, you let out a noise and scooted closer to him, pressing against his side and resting the palm of your hand over your heartbeat, just as the two of you always did.
Just like he had never left.
You weren’t an early bird. Usually, Sam was. He went out for runs, or just left bed early to get more of his day, but whenever he was home with you – which seemed to be a lot fewer times lately – you tried your best to let him sleep in.
He barely got four hours of rest anyway while he was with Dean, so whenever you could, you let him take as much time as possible. Sam always claimed to have a sort of inner clock that woke him up at ungodly times anyways, but whenever he shared a bed with you, that clock seemed to be muted.
You were preparing breakfast when Sam came down the stairs. It didn’t matter what time it was, because you were two grown adults living in your own place, and you could very well decide at what time of day to eat what, thank you very much.
Some eggs and bacon were sizzling in the pan, as two strong arms wrapped around your waist from behind. You felt the soft tickle of Sam’s breath against your skin, and the start of a stubble, while he pressed light, whispered kisses over your naked shoulder.
“Sorry I stayed away longer than I said I would,” Sam apologized softly next to your ear, voice still rough and drunken from sleep.
You blindly raised a hand to his head behind you and began scratching his scalp. Sam hummed into the crook of your neck.
“It’s okay baby,” you reassured him quietly.
“Hm, ‘s not,” Sam mumbled. Without a warning, his hold around your body tightened, and he lifted you up, twirling you around and placing you down on top of the kitchen isle. You yelped in surprise, naked thighs unsuccessfully shying away from the cold stone plate.
The freezing feeling was fast forgotten, when Sam dashed forward, hands supported on either side of your body, pressing his lips into yours.
A surprised grunt slipped past your lips when you pushed your mouth back into his. Sam’s lips felt chapped, and dry, maybe a bit bloody. They felt like the best kiss you’d ever gotten.
“Sam, the eggs are going to burn.” You protested when he pulled back to gasp for air.
Gaze fixated on you, Sam reached behind him, grabbed the dial, and swiftly turned it from a 6 to a 0. He smiled up at you, pure mischief blinking in his eyes.
“You’re insufferable,” You said, but the grin on your lips took away all the power behind it. Sam merely hummed and leaned in closer to you again. You met him halfway.
This kiss was softer, slower. An appreciation of the other’s presence and basking in it, rather than the kiss of reunion from before. You didn’t mind.
Sam had always felt perfectly shaped for you, in any way one could imagine. From the first day, he had known your lips like he had mesmerized them from an earlier life, and when he shared a bed with you, his arms hugged your body in just the way to make you feel harbored.
“How was the hunt?” You whispered. Sam’s head was resting in the crook of your neck again, as you pressed your cheek into his hair and carded your fingers through the dark strands.
Sam grunted. “I’ll never get used to you so casually asking that.”
A soft laugh escaped your throat.
Sam shifted and looked at you. “It was good,” He answered. “Missed you, though.”
He pecked your lips. You pouted. “I missed you too, baby.”
Something dark crossed Sam’s face. The corners of his mouth fell.
“You know, it’s days like these I wish I wouldn’t have to do this,” He admitted to you.
You nodded in understanding. “I know.”
Sam furrowed his eyebrows. “How can you live with this so easily? With me? I would’ve kicked myself out months ago.”
Your thumb softly smoothed out the worried line of his eyebrow. “Sam, what you and Dean do out there is so important,” You remind him. “You save people. And you love doing it.”
Sam shook his head, unconvinced. “Why are you being so understanding about this? Why can’t we fight, and you can you just yell at me to stay?”
“Would you?”
Sam didn’t answer, just averted your eyes at the question.
“Exactly.” You smiled softly. “Sam, I know I couldn’t keep you from this. And that’s why I would never ask you to give it up. I would never make you choose.”
“But it’s not how this should be. How we should be. I.” He touched his forehead softly against yours.
“Always one foot out the door. It’s not what you deserve.”
“Maybe not. But I know how much it means to you. Being out there, saving people, being with your brother. And I would never keep you from that.” You added.
Sam’s eyes flashed with an offer. “Then come with me.”
You softly shook your head. “You know you can’t ask that of me.”
He bowed his head again. “I know, I-“ He sighed. “I’m sorry.”
You tilted his chin up to look at you. His eyes were liquid, glistening in the dim light of your kitchen like warm copper. “Hey. You didn’t let me finish before.”
Your thumbs caressed his cheek, your hands holding up his head. “Maybe it is not what I deserve. But it is what I want.” You leaned closer to him. “You are what I want, Sam Winchester.”
Sam leaned his forehead against yours. “You are what I’ll always want.”
For a moment, you closed your eyes. You felt your breathing through the silence of the kitchen, the rising and sinking of your chest, and how it accommodated to move the same as Sam’s.
You felt the beating of a heartbeat. You couldn’t say if it was Sam’s, or yours. They beat the same.
“What did I do to deserve you?” He whispered. You grinned.
“You bring me souvenirs from every town you go in.”
“That’s nothing.”
You lean back and look at him. “For me, it’s everything.”
Sam’s eyes dart in-between yours, and the look that burned in them was so sincere, it almost made his heart ache. Dean had called you a witch once, Sam just called it love.
He wrapped you into another kiss.
You spent a lot of time kissing that morning.
The eggs were already cooled down by the time you served them, and the bacon was no longer crispy, but it didn’t matter. Sam was too captivated by being back home with you, to pay that much mind to the food anyway.
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heartsforhavik · 4 months
Text
imagine waking up next to kuai liang… (sfw)
warnings: mk1 story mode spoilers, established relationship, gender neutral reader
a/n: y’all i’m so sorry i haven’t been writing lately, i feel like my motivation disappeared into thin air and the only drafts i’ve written i’m not satisfied with. thanks to everyone still sticking around <3 also i just wrote this off the top of my head. it’s 2 am. this is a draft. not proofread, not planned or anything, it’s completely raw.
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you woke up in your shared bed with kuai liang, opening your eyes to see him still sleeping by your side. his hair was undone and messy, he had his lips slightly parted and a bit of drool was escaping from his mouth, which you chuckled at.
you remembered staying up that night just to greet him when he returned home. it seemed that he was working harder ever since he formed the shirai ryu. kuai liang started arriving home later and later, which made you feel a bit lonely. you understood that he was simply busy, but you just wanted to spend more time with him.
so when he returned that night, you two were finally able to go to bed at the same time. and now you also get to wake up at the same time.
you gently moved his hair away from his eyes, revealing his face. kuai liang’s new scar thankfully didn’t hinder his looks, and he was still the same handsome man that you always loved. you took a moment to admire him before he woke up. his skin was smooth, his hair was just as shiny and silky as always. it was almost amusing how he managed to still look handsome in his sleep.
after you spent a couple minutes silently admiring your lover, the shirai ryu’s grandmaster began to awake from his rest. he slowly opened his eyes, and as soon as they landed on you, he smiled.
“good morning, my love. did you sleep well?” he asked in a soft tone, as he gently rubbed your cheek.
“i did. but to be honest, it didn’t matter how i slept. i was just happy to finally have the same sleep schedule as you for once.” you professed.
kuai liang laughed softly. “i am pleased that we were able to enjoy a night together again, but…” he paused, then sighed and looked down in shame. “i fear i may have neglected you. i understand if you are angry at me-”
“don’t say that.” you interrupted. “there is no need to apologize for being busy. besides, you have a lot on your plate after bi-han’s betrayal. i know it is out of your control. i can tell that you’re doing everything that you can for me, and i appreciate it.” you reassured, as you ran your fingers through his hair.
kuai liang sighed in response to your affection, and closed his eyes in contentment, savoring the domestic moment with you.
he used to be filled with repentance at the realization that he was starting to leave you alone more and more as the days went by. but as soon as you expressed that you understood his work ethic and his anguish after his brother’s betrayal, he felt as if a weight was lifted from his chest.
“thank you... i don’t know what i did to deserve you.” kuai liang praised, as he gave you a kiss on the forehead and got up from the bed.
“no need to thank me. i’m always here if you need anything, okay? i know it must be hard to lead a clan.” you sympathized.
kuai liang would never be able to describe how overjoyed he felt in that moment. he was more than thankful for your help, and he could never ask for a better partner than you. you were always there for him and you always understood him.
the love between you two was warm and pure. you both supported each other and always offered help to the other’s dilemmas. it was a relationship where you both felt safe and secure at all times. you may not be able to spend as much time together as you wish, but the very few moments you two shared were good enough to leave you both satisfied.
even on mornings like that, where you only have a scarce amount of time with kuai liang, you still manage to make it work.
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halfmoonshines · 22 days
Text
soft spot
damon salvatore x reader
summary; you're injured in a fight with a rogue vampire who breezed into town, and Damon is being weird about it
hurt/comfort
----
You tried to stay hidden in the shadows outside of the streetlight, but your rapid heartbeat probably would've given you away either way.
"Who the hell is this guy?" You heard Damon mutter from the spot he was tossed just a few feet away from you, dusting the dirt from the trash cans he'd squished like cardboard. His ice blue eyes spared you a quick glance but didn't say a word, trying not to draw any attention your way.
Damon intervened as Caroline was struggling to grapple with the stranger. In the span of a moment, she was on the ground groaning with a broken arm and he had launched the assailant to give them a chance to regroup - right toward you.
You couldn't help the little gasp that you emitted, no matter how much time you spent around these creatures this was a vampire. One in particular who would have no hang ups about snapping your neck.
Per their supernatural hearing, it didn't take long for the mans vicious senses to find you, and took half as long for him to have a bruising hand around your neck.
The sound of Damon yelling your name was distant in the background, you were focused on the threat literally snarling in your face.
"Don't you smell good?"
That was as far as the stranger managed to get before Damon had the broken handle of a broom protruding from his back. His grip slipped off your throat as his body slid sideways and you toppled to the ground, heading bouncing off the pavement hard enough for you to see stars.
Damon's voice was faint to you again, but you could hear him begging for your attention. Caroline was in the background too, in panicked discussion with someone over the phone. You couldn't get your eyes to focus though, hair becoming wet and warm.
The eldest Salvatore's touch on you was feather light, his mouth still moving with words he wanted you to latch onto but you had already lost the dance with consciousness.
⋆。˚ ☁︎ ˚。⋆。˚☽˚。⋆
The first thing you were aware of when you woke up in a bed was that it was decidedly not yours. The next thing you noticed was that you weren't in any pain, just a bit stiff when you went to sit up from the bed. Someone had definitely given you blood, which was against every rule her and her friends had discussed, but from the smell of the sheets behind you - Damon wouldn't have cared either way.
You made your way out of the room and down the stairs, vaguely knowing the layout of the boarding house from your handful of times actually coming inside. Over the last few months you had become dangerously intertwined in Elena's grapple with the supernatural, despite Bonnie's vehement advice to go as far as possible. You were emancipated, you could switch schools and move to Pennsylvania.
No, you couldn't. Once your conscious had been opened to everything around you, once you were aware of the dangers of the dark - you could never ignore that. Better the evil you know.
Speaking of.
You came upon Damon in his favorite spot, a tumbler of bourbon in his hand while he leaned up against the fireplace. The suit jacket he had been wearing earlier that night was discarded on the couch behind him, a small amount of blood on the collar of his shirt still.
"You always look so broody." Poking fun at him might not be in your best interest, but you figured you'd give it a go. Over the last few months, your and Damon's relationship had morphed into something you couldn't quite understand, but moments like these had seemed to become more comfortable between you.
"I believe you're confusing me with my much broodier younger brother." Damon's words were laced with sarcasm, but his tone didn't have a hint of amusement.
You felt suddenly awkward, in his space and home. Just because you had gotten kind of comfortable lately didn't mean he wanted to be around you.
"Well, thanks for the whole life saving thing." You began to babble nervously, a faint pink glow to your cheeks. "I'll get out of your hair. Sorry for taking your bed, I don't even know what time it is-" You had begun turning toward the door, making to just leave and find a way home. How you could this age and still flustered in front of attractive men, especially murderous ones was beyond you.
Damon appearing in front of you almost made your heart stop, hair stirring at his incredibly fast movements. He was barely a foot away, his piercing gaze holding your confused one. From this close you could smell just how much he had probably drank.
"Are you... okay, Damon?" Your voice wavered a bit under the heat of his stare and you saw the muscle in his jaw working overtime while he looked like he was debating whether or not he wanted to actually say anything to you.
"You don't have to thank me for saving you when you were in danger because of me." His eyes had drifted from your eyes to your neck, voice whisper quiet.
Vulnerability was the last thing you expected from the man standing over you. "What do you mean? It wasn't your fault. Just wrong place, wrong time and I so happen to be the weakest link." You hoped your voice conveyed even a bit of humor.
His eyes snapped back up to yours, head tilting slightly while he assessed you. Damon's hand rose to grab a lock of your hair, twirling it around his finger in thought. Your breath caught in your throat, feeling like you were on the precipice of something.
"My weakest link, maybe. Have I told you how much I like your hair?" His voice was still quiet, an innocent lilt.
Your mind was reeling, half drunk on his closeness and hazed by confusion. Where was this coming from? Had he drank a small liquor store and now he was confusing her for her much more appealing best friend?
"Damon, I'm not sure how much you've had to drink, but I'm happy to brew you a pot of coffee. Does that even work for vampires?"
You had started to pull away, making to turn toward the kitchen but Damon was infinitely faster than you. His drink was discarded, one hand going to your upper arm and the other to your waist, tugging you back into his vicinity.
"On the contrary, I don't think I've ever been so sure minded, sparrow. I'm sorry for not protecting you tonight." His voice was tight now, the warmth of his hands tingling down your body.
"It's not your fault, or job, Damon." Your voice had quieted to match his, all humor leaving. You didn't know where this guilt had come from, but it was misplaced. Since you'd met Damon he'd made some bad decisions, but you had also seen his sacrifice so much for the sake of the team. Even if others didn't acknowledge it, he didn't need to add anymore to his plate.
"I'd like it to be. My job." His reply was lightning quick, eyes pinning yours in place.
Were you dreaming?
Damon's signature smirk was visible for a split second, telling you that your confusion was written all over your face. "I think that I'm asking you, in the most coming of age movie way, if you'd like to go steady?"
⋆。˚ ☁︎ ˚。⋆。˚☽˚。⋆
send any fic requests here!! all comments/criticisms/requests welcome
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ralvezfanatic · 3 months
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Hi, I see you requests are open 😺 I love your work ♥️♥️ Can I request a write-up about Spencer Reid? where Reader has a online work that keeps him up late and Spencer worries that the reader is not sleeping and wants to take him to sleep, especially that Spencer can't sleep without Reader. I hope it was understood, sorry. English is not my first language.
Thank you, I really love how you write!! Take your time ✨
Sleepy
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Spencer Reid x Male!Reader
Reader likes to stay up late to finish his work, leaving Spencer alone in bed. Unfortunately Spencer can't sleep without his boyfriend.
Warnings: Fluff. Clingy Spencer, sorta workaholic/insomniac Reader. Soft kissing at the end, nth sexual.
Note: tysm for the request anon !! this was really nice to write, and no worries, i understood this perfectly :))
Word Count: 1.1k
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You worked from home, meaning you were practically your own boss. You managed your own time and worked whatever hours you wanted. It didn't matter as long as you finished by the deadline, or earlier which was always better because you'd have more free time.
That's what you've been doing recently. Staying up late in your office trying to finish your latest project early so you'd have more time with Spencer in the day. You'd never know when he'd be called on a case so you figured spending most of the day and evening with him was better.
You had already been in bed, trying to sleep as Spencer cuddled up to you. His long limbs wrapped around you, keeping you close to him for warmth and comfort. Although he wore a long sleeved shirt and pajama pants, he was somehow cold, which meant he stayed glued to you.
You held him close to you, playing with his curls as he slept soundly. His face was relaxed and he looked so peaceful. You moved some of his hair off his face and placed a soft kiss on his nose before gently freeing yourself from his embrace.
Of course you wanted to be with him, but you weren't tired.. and you think you just came up with a solution for that little bug in your project. You pulled the blanket that Spencer had somehow thrown off himself and covered him up so he'd be warm. You took a hoodie from the desk chair in the room, and quickly threw it on, not really wanting to be shirtless as you worked.
Silently, you made your way to your office and thanked your forgetful self for leaving the door open, knowing that it creaked too much when opened.
You, of course, left the door open when you entered, not wanting to make too much noise so you wouldn't wake up your boyfriend, wanting him to rest as much as possible. He probably didn't sleep enough while he was away on the case, so you wanted to make sure he stayed asleep all night.
You sat down at your desk, waking up your computer and opening up your project, quickly getting to work. You thought you could maybe finish up this project if you stayed up most of the night. Surely Spencer wouldn't mind, he was deep asleep.
As the computer finally opened up your project, you started working on it, trying out the solution that came to your mind moments ago.
Unfortunately, Spencer did mind you leaving him in the middle of the night. He woke up moments after you left him, frowning at the empty spot next to him. He rubbed his eyes, looking out the room for a sign of you, trying to listen for a toilet flushing, hoping you just needed the bathroom.
Spencer stayed in bed a few minutes, but finally got up when he didn't hear anything. He yawned and got up, putting on his slippers and heading to your office, upset that you were up working again.
“Y/N, come to bed.” Spencer whined as he approached you from behind. “It's late, you can work on that tomorrow.” He frowned, leaning down and wrapping his arms around you, hiding his face into the crook of your neck, hiding his yawn.
“Baby? I thought you were sleeping?” You ask softly, looking up at him confused and grabbing his hands on your chest. “I was! Until you left me..” He muttered into your neck. “Y/N, you need sleep, these habits aren't healthy.” He stood up, stretching up as you spun your chair to face him.
“I don't want to hear about unhealthy sleeping habits from you,” You responded, raising an eyebrow at him. “Dr. Staying up all night to look for the case for something you must have missed”
Spencer frowned at you, but stayed silent knowing you were right. He shook his head and took your hands, pulling you up from your chair. “That’s only during cases. You do it all the time.” He sighed, pulling you into a hug. “Come to bed.” He asked, his voice soft as he held you.
“But-”
“I can't sleep without you.” He whined, interrupting any excuse you were about to give. “Please?” He hid his face away into your shoulder, begging you to go to bed.
“Okay.” You nod, feeling bad for not only waking him, but worrying him about your health.
“Really?” Spencer pulled away from your neck and looked at you with a small smile.
“Of course sweetheart.” You nod, smiling back at him. “And I'm sorry to have woken you up..” You apologize, cupping his cheek and pressing a small kiss onto his nose.
“Just don't do it again.” He chuckled, scrunching his nose at your kiss.”C'mon, lets go to bed, I'm getting cold already.” He took hold of your hand, leading you out of the office.
“Hey! My computer is still on!” You laugh, letting him lead you away, knowing it's not that big of a deal.
“Don't care!! I'm cold and sleepy!” He replied as you closed your office door after exiting.
You shook your head and headed to your bedroom with Spencer, grateful for having such a caring boyfriend.
He climbed into bed quickly, lifting the blanket as he waited for you. You pull off your hoodie and throw it back to the chair it was on earlier and slip into bed next to your boyfriend, who looks at you oddly.
“How are you never cold?” His eyebrows furrow, dropping the blanket over the both of you, quickly snuggling up to you.
You shrug, pulling him close into a hug and petting his hair. “I don’t know.. but it could be because I'm just super hot.” You reply with a smirk, which makes Spencer laugh.
“Mm, yeah probably.” He agrees, looking up at you with a smile. He stretches his neck up to your face and gives you a kiss, which you quickly accept. You both shift slightly on the bed in order to be in a more comfortable position to kiss each other.
You grab Spencer's jaw and hold him gently, the both of you just kissing each other lazily. The kiss was soft, gentle and full of love. It was quick, neither of you wanting to take it any further.
“Mm, love you Y/N” Spencer pulls away, a faint blush on his cheeks that were just barely visible with the moonlight that shone through the windows.
You smile at him, pressing another kiss onto his forehead before responding. “Love you too Spence.”
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