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mushroomnoodles · 5 months

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the lovers/vampire au hcdump part 2, with a focus on petrigrof (characters drawn in my style)

once again putting under a read more; these are notes ive put down while riding home from work on the bus. here's pt 1 btw.

On the subject of THE HANGED MAN

something simon thinks about often is the sheer stagnance of vampirekind. vampires are a species that stay the same forever- they don't evolve or change; hell, the vampire kingdom is old school, even to simon.

simon is physically weaker than an average vampire- he suspects this is due to the radiation poisoning he suffered from before being turned. it takes him longer to heal and he doesn't have possess vampire strength the others of his kind have.

simon doesnt really mind this- he merely observes this fact. his body stayed the same way it was the morning betty bit him; the same way it was after her bite mutated and changed his body for the last time. plus, simon is a man of habit.

a thousand years of life with betty has made simon more open with her; they talk, like, about how they feel, how their relationship feels.

simon has grown quite philosophical and his field of study has expanded. being undead gives him this subconscious duty to put his eternal life to good use: the library. an ode to scholars and thinkers, adventurers and collectors. an ode to the humanity he left behind.

he always says sorry to the few humans he's ever directly fed from.

simon has only fallen to blood frenzy once.

simon's library is quite frankly, huge. you can't reach the books on half the shelves without flight or telekinesis.

current research focus is on procuring the ice crown. (he would be immune to its effects as a vampire)

simon refuses assistants and servants because they make him feel weird, despite the fact THE LOVERS could absolutely have them in their chambers.

simon loves his side job as a professor btw. he always gets so cheery and dorky when it's that time of the year for him to get his students.. and he loves history!! he definitely goes on old man rants about "his day" every now and then

being pregnant with morrigan made him wonder if perhaps there WAS a cure for vampirism after all. he'd entertained the thought every now and then despite the fact that everything he looked into claimed it couldn't happen. but if his body could still remember how to function like a human's, then it didn't seem so impossible to him.

On the subject of THE WORLD

a great strategist- but she misses traveling the world, researching and hunting for ancient artifacts with simon. this is not her dream.

cooking food was a love language and hobby for her. sux when you and your hubby can't eat food.

loves making morrigan snacks (they're a living vampire and can eat food!)

betty's whole thing is.. improvise. adapt. overcome. she keeps working hard so she can keep winning hard.

her fangs are VERY long. they always jut out of her mouth despite her best efforts, and she has to hide her mouth when incognito.

that makes it kinda hard to kiss simon but she's had a thousand years of practice!

due to the length of her fangs, her feeding bites are always fatal.

she is considered very beautiful. simon agrees

spends a lot of time out and about. she is also the vampire king's current advisor, so she spends a lot of time by his side. it's probably a good thing, and a better thing he trusts her. but she worries. she isn't as ruthless with the subject of conquest as others would like. sure, vampires are powerful, but taking over everything.. would upset the balance of life. they'd exhaust their resources.

she can be pretty scary. betty has learned to project an intimidating persona to keep up her role as battle strategist and advisor. it helps keep others off her back, too.

betty is in part so successful because she is constantly improving upon herself and adapting, she challenges vampirekind to change. it's just so hard for them to do.

betty adapts well to new settings. she finds it.. reasonably easy to settle into new situations, especially when human spying is involved. she just needs a feel for her surroundings.

betty can be ruthless, sure, especially when simon is involved in the danger. but she remembers her roots. she would never cause harm to a human that was not a threat.

she partially trained marceline to fight before the vampire king took over her training.

she's stressed. simon is her escape. she always gets to their chambers, throws her expensive and intricate robes off.. and embraces simon.

dramatically lounges and climbs all over simon in her sleep. subconsciously heat seeking.

worries that if things come to it and they leave the kingdom, simon will be unhappy. he seems to really like it here.

sleeps naked 80% of the time

#vampbetty #vampsimon #vamparents #hc moment #my style <3 #when u want to be the lovers but ur too GOd Damn Busy

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bobbinlacebliss · 11 months

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Hi, I am starting on my journey to learn bobbin lace (I have all the materials already, cushions, bobbins, patterns etc.) I know how to do the basic stuff and even ventured out to do a VERY simple bookmark. I am planning on doing another one but I am quite lost on how to improve my lace making. All the lace makers I see are super advanced and almost unreachable. I want to be able to some day create those extremely beutiful designs you do but I don't know exactly how to progess withouth feeling so overwhelmed. Any advice on a route to improvement?

Kind regards, M.

A very simple bookmark is absolutely the place to start. That is where I started as well. If you have the basic stitches down, it sounds like you are well on your way. After practicing basic grounds until you are comfortable with them, one thing you can do is try working through a book of beginner patterns - there are many available, though without knowing what style of lace you want to get into and what you have already practiced, it's difficult to give a specific recommendation. In general though, I do recommend finding actual books on lacemaking, above relying on internet resources only. In my experience, most of what is available freely on the internet only advances to a certain point.

Here are some books from my library that I believe may be suitable for beginners (though by no means should these be taken as exclusive recommendations - there are certainly good lacemaking books in existence that I do not own! And these are also highly biased towards Bucks Point, the style I prefer.)

Torchon Lacemaking: A Manual of Techniques by Elizabeth Wade (my only torchon offering, sorry)

A Visual Introduction to Bucks Point Lace by Geraldine Stott (many of the patterns featured on my blog are from this book)

All about making - Geometrical Bucks Point Lace by Alexandra Stillwell (as well as numerous patterns entirely suitable for beginners, includes a great deal of technical instruction and theory - highly useful)

Bucks Point Lace Workbook by Louise West (also a book which introduces the beginner to important concepts in Bucks lace via example patterns accompanied by theory, though I would say it is a steeper learning curve, and less detailed, than Stillwell)

Finally, The Grammar of Point Ground by Ulrike Voelcker is a book that should be in the library of any serious point ground lace student who can get their hands on it, in my opinion. This book has been invaluable to me and I cannot recommend it enough. If you can't find or afford it, I highly recommend seeing if you can borrow it from a local lacemaking guild or even public library. Includes patterns you can work, but is mostly a book about theory and technique.

#bobbin lace #advice #tbh when in doubt go with ulrike though lol #she has published many books covering a wide range of lace styles #I am convinced she has never written anything subpar #also I've met her and she's KIND OF foxy #I don't have a crush who said that????

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hanbindans · 1 year

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zerobaseone as IB students (headcanons)

some fun headcanons for my fellow students. please take these with a grain of salt, obviously I don't know them personally and these are just meant to be fun :) word count: 1.1 k (ca 140 for each) a/n: this is for a very niche target audience but it makes sense in MY head. also I have exams in less than 2 weeks so this is kind of representative of where my mind is at rn. and PSA if you're also an IB student please don't actually skip TOK <3

jiwoong

what's that?? "he's a 24 year old man, it's been years since he completed high school??" sorry I can't hear you too well I'll just go ahead and write this headcanon anyway <3

he's such a drama kid and he would take it even in IB, so theatre and korean lit would be his HLs

I feel like he would take bio and psych sl purely out of curiosity and then immediately regret it when he realizes how much content there is (but would be really good at psych)

aa sl!!! no particular reason tbh I just think he's kind of smart

doesn't understand tok. like...... at ALL. is saved by the fact that his psychology EE is pretty good because he pretty much flunks tok miserably

CAS defender because "guys it builds character I think it's great that we all do volunteer work :))" bless his heart

hanbin

7 subjects :)

is good at tok probably

genuinely puts SO much time and effort into his cas and regrets it in the end but it looks cool on his resumé

psychology and korean lit HL, probably takes VA too but maybe as sl. he gives such lit vibes I feel like he would totally be a literature kid

chinese ab!!!! and maybe ESS because he can and doesn't like science <3

AI SL just because he's so social science but he gets 6s and 7s because it's too easy for him <3

basically he's all the social science subjects but because they're FUN not because they're easy :)

shares notes and study resources in the class group chat because he's cool like that

zhang hao

science kid

HL math AA, geography, and maybe chem or bio. maybe takes physics SL too.

definitely chinese lang/lit and korean ab (he could definitely do korean B but he can't be bothered)

you won't catch him anywhere without a comically large energy drink

completely numbed on the inside but also puts more effort in than everyone else and gets straight 7's

skips tok though because he can't be asked

does his EE on a very niche obsession of his and it gets a really good grade but he puts way too much effort into it

everyone wants to learn his ways but he doesn't do study groups because he gets too annoyed lmao. WILL tell juniors chatting in the library to stfu

he will complain about anything and everything any chance he gets but also catch him getting that 45 at the end of the day.

taerae

also science kid but a lot less intense

HL bio, chem, music, SL AA, korean lang/lit and japanese ab

he would complain SO MUCH about group 2 btw he's one of those science kids who really doesn't want to do 2 languages lol

really only cares about music to be honest but does the sciencey subjects because he thinks they're cool and gets pretty good grades

the type to do a hyper specific science IA and spend way too much time on it just for shits and giggles because he likes pouring things into beakers and swirling them

unintentionally does the most for his CAS, like "oh a service??? yeah I've been tutoring guitar for like 6 months does that count" and genuinely fails to see how other people struggle with it

also excells at tok, like genuinely writes an amazing philosophical TOK essay and gets full marks

ironically cares so little about IB but somehow does so well because he genuinely likes his subjects (and has an iq of like 150)

matthew

7 subjects :)

wants to do more languages than he's allowed because he's just built like that, he likes flexing his multilingualism

HL english lang/lit, french B, history. SL AA, bio, chem, psych

is annoyingly good at all his subjects like HOW are you doing all that and remembering everything?? secretly kind of a genius

does the mostest for his IAs for absolutely no reason other than he's just interested in his subjects and wants to do fun projects :)

also genuinely likes CAS for the same reason (play sports feed stray cats, what's not to like?)

super ambitious classmate who is somehow the only one still sane and always happy

encourages everyone before tests and exams like "come on guys we can do it!! :)"

ricky

this is more likely than you think like do you know how many rich international kids do IB??? in an alternate reality he's M23

visual art HL <33

probably business management HL too, but I could see him doing psych as well!! I think he'd enjoy the human relationships option

chinese lang/lit and english B because why do a bilingual diploma and struggle when you could just breeze through english B?????

AI and ESS sl because he cba, he just wants to pass fr.

to be honest he only really cares about visual art (does his EE in it and regrets it every day) and his social science a liiittle bit, other than that he's just doing exactly as much as he needs to pass

super chill classmate though like all IB kids need a Ricky in their class to humble our god complexes

gyubin

IB but because he's an exchange student :') like he didn't even know what IB was when he started it

cramming the night before tests because he can't be asked to dedicate his whole life to studying

actually the nicest classmate though

eng b HL and breezes through it

ESS and AI sl together with ricky (they sit in the back of the class and snack together <3)

also like business management/psychology or something equivalent but he's REALLY good at it and gets easy 7's?? like he will be that 1 kid who has that 1 subject that he's an absolute god at

cries every tok lesson but it's alright

favourite part is ironically CAS because he has an excuse to volunteer at dog shelters and play basketball with his friends :)

gunwook

peak IB child I bet he would take this programme for real

4 hls (economics, psychology, korean lang lit, chemistry)

I have no justification for these subjects btw I just spat out 4 that I think he would take. he definitely would do 4 HLs though because that's how he rolls

ALSO takes cas very seriously for absolutely no reason

also takes tok SUPER seriously- he will lead class discussions and get into heated debates about stupid shit like if newspeak would work in real life

AA sl and japanese ab because that's just his vibes

kind of overworked but is always helpful and shares notes with his classmates :)

does his EE in economics and ends up getting way too invested in it and becomes obsessed with economic development policies or something niche like that (nerd but affectionately <3)

very stressed and overworked but he WILL get those grades at the end of the day <33

#boys planet scenarios #boys planet imagines #zb1 #zerobaseone #boys planet headcanons #kim jiwoong #sung hanbin #zhang hao #kim taerae #seok matthew #shen ricky #kim gyuvin #park gunwook #this was purely for personal entertainment but I think it's fun so I'm posting it lol

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skaikruswan · 2 years

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reader overloads herself by trying to be a good queen for the kingdom and for morpheus, reading and practicing and neglecting herself telling herself that there are important things to learn, after she doesn't want to disappoint everyone just for being human and wants to be better for him and everyone that he loves and that she loves too.

Thanks for the request of desire disguising himself as a morpheus, I loved the touch of anguish (relax I'm not a masochist lol😜😜) but I love her writings. 😍😍

Heavy crown, heavy burden

WC: 1.6 k Ao3

Relationship: Morpheus x f!reader

Notes: established relationship, king and queen, some angst

Dear anon, thanks for the prompt and for your kind words. I'm glad you liked the prompt :D I am sorry it took a while and I hope you like it!

If you liked this story, i have written others.

It started small.

You’ve always loved assisting Lucienne in the library, sorting and shelving the many tomes and books. It gave you a purpose while Morpheus was busy, and the smell of leather and paper was soothing.

“My lady, do you have any recommendations on how I could improve this library?” Lucienne asked after you’ve finished your work, and you owlishly blinked at her. Her hands linked behind her back, Lucienne gave you an expectant look.

“I don’t know. I would have to think about it,” you answered slowly. The library was a marvel and Lucienne was a very apt and resourceful person. “If you don’t mind me asking, why do you ask me?” While you felt flattered, you wondered why she didn’t just ask Morpheus.

“Given your position in this realm, I thought it best to include you in such matters,” Lucienne answered, readjusting her glasses. You only frowned at her cryptic answer. Your position? What position do you have? “I may have overstepped. Please forgive me.”

Lucienne walked away, called by a dream requiring assistance, and you were left alone with your questions.

------------------------

“Don’t forget to bow,” you heard Cain hiss. He must have thought that you wouldn’t notice it as you observed Goldie, smiling as the little gargoyle flitted around you, letting out delighted croaks.

“Your grace, can I offer you something to drink?” Cain asked, and you disliked his overly formal tone. You’ve started to consider Cain and Abel to be your friends, and you didn’t understand why they suddenly kept their distance. Did you do something wrong?

“Cain, you can call me by my name,” you answered, giving him an amused smile. “I would like a glass of juice, if that’s all right.” Dreams were incredible, and every night you were impressed anew by how adaptable they were. You knew you could just dream up a glass of juice, but you didn’t want to snub Cain.

Cain elbowed his brother, who hurried away into their cottage, only to return balancing a tray with several glasses of juice.

“There you go, your grace,” Abel offered nervously, almost trembling. Your worries only grew, twisting your insides.

You reached for a glass and took a sip, under the watchful eyes of the brothers. The juice was delicious, and you drank it in one go. You gently put the glass back on the tablet, curious to try out another juice.

“I can bring you another glass, my queen,” Abel said, avoiding your gaze, and you froze, almost spitting out your drink.

“Queen?” You pronounced that word with indignation, as it continued to ring inside your mind.

--------------------------------

You marched inside the heart of the palace, your curiosity and confusion stronger than your worries. Morpheus would have the answers.

The King of dreams and nightmares was sitting on his throne, a pensive look on his face as he observed his empty throne room. As he noticed you approaching, he rose gracefully, taking your hand after you climbed all the stairs.

“My love,” he said, pressing his lips against the back of your hand. Such small gestures usually melted you, but you willed yourself to remain hard.

“My king,” you replied, catching the briefest flash of discontent in his bottomless blue eyes. Morpheus preferred you to usually use his name. “Shouldn’t you call me your queen?” There was no need to beat around the bush. Morpheus let out a small sigh, and you waited.

“My love, I apologize if the citizens of the realm may have confused you. They did not mean ill. However, they should have waited for my approval,” Morpheus explained, and you understood even less. He reached for a wayward strand of your hair and gently tugged it behind your ear.

“Your approval for what? Morpheus, I don’t understand,” you admit, feeling stupid. What was going on?

“My love, our relationship brings me joy. You’ve won my heart and the affection of the residents of my realm. If you’re willing, I would like you to be my queen.” His earnest proposal rattled your heart and made every thought inside your mind vanish. It was true that your relationship with him has become a cornerstone of your life. You couldn’t imagine living without him. And yet…

“Morpheus, this feels like a proposal,” you couldn’t help but giggle, your heart doing summersaults while butterflies flew inside your stomach.

Instead of replying, he reached inside a pocket and presented a beautiful golden ring with a gleaming ruby in the middle.

“Be my queen,” he asked, falling to one knee. Dream of the Endless was kneeling in front of you, and you started laughing, tears of joy running down your cheeks as you moved your shaky hand and allowed him to put the ring on your finger. It fitted perfectly.

“Yes, my king.”

--------------------------------

You wake up in the real world and blink at the darkness inside your room. Your bladder has woken you up, and you let out a low curse. You had almost finished the chapter of your book.

Inside your bathroom, under the harsh light, you see yourself and almost startle. The dark circles under your eyes seem to be drawn on your pale skin. You don’t look good, but that is a small price to pay.

Queen of the Dreaming. After accepting Morpheus’ proposal, you swore to give your all to your new function. Days and nights are spent reading and practicing so you can fulfill your duty.

You spray some water on your face. Now that you’re awake, you can continue your research in the waking world. Nothing beats the Dreaming’s library, but here in the waking world, you have the Internet. Close enough.

You rub your thumb against your ring. You know that you’re not the first Queen of the Dreaming. Calliope’s shadow hangs above you. How can you, a mere human, follow in her footsteps? How can you compete against a goddess?

You rub away your tiredness and prepare your breakfast. Every day and every night, you dedicate yourself to your goal: becoming a worthy queen. You owe it to Morpheus and his realm.

---------------------------

Matthew caws a few times as he soars above you, and you’re either too exhausted or distracted to notice him; he can’t decide which one is worse.

Matthew has watched you become a mere shadow of yourself. You spent your dreams inside the library and your days researching or taking ridiculous courses to improve your posture or correct your pronunciation. As if you needed all that.

Matthew gets that becoming the freaking queen of the Dreaming is big deal, but nobody needs or wants a half-dead queen.

He’s going to talk to the boss and make him listen.

---------------------------

You enter the Dreaming, and don’t find yourself back at the library, but instead in your favorite meadow inside Fiddler’s Green. You allow yourself to close your eyes and enjoy the soothing nature for one minute, and then you will return to the palace. A queen has no time to lose.

When you open your eyes again, you find Morpheus standing next to you, giving you a loving look. You hope that he doesn’t pay too much attention to your appearance, that you managed to hide the traces of your tiredness.

“My love, please sit with me,” Morpheus asks, and you wish you could accept his request. At the beginning of your relationship, Morpheus had explored Fiddler’s Green with you, and you miss your dates.

“I would love to, but there are books calling my name,” you answer, your voice light and cheery. Everything you do, you do for him.

“Your king commands you,” Morpheus says, his lips curved into a small smile, and you comply, sitting on the soft grass. Morpheus sits down next to you, his knees touching yours.

“My love, you hold my heart. It pains me to see you suffer. Please, take care of yourself,” Morpheus begins, his voice full of affection, and your heart stutters as your shoulders rise defensively.

“Morpheus, I am sorry. I will try to do better,” you say, avoiding his gaze. You’ve already started to disappoint him. Stupid, foolish human.

“You misunderstand.” Morpheus gently grabs your chin, his thumb stoking over your jaw. “I see you fade away, and it hurts. I don’t need a perfect queen by my side. I only need my love.”

Your lip wobbles as you let out a shaky breath. His concerned gaze holds you prisoner, and you feel your defenses shatter against his gentle touch and gentler words.

You break.

“I am so worried that I will disappoint you and everyone in this realm,” you confess, your voice a whisper, tears dripping down your chin.

“My love, you could never.” Morpheus wipes away your tears with his thumb and cradles your face, and you lean into his touch. “All I need is you. All I want is you. Please, look after yourself.”

You nod, swallowing the lump inside your throat. You readjust yourself so that your head is resting on his lap, his coat the best pillow in the whole Dreaming. Morpheus chuckles and starts to glide his fingers through your hair. The tension that you thought had settled inside your bones starts to disappear, and you let out a long, content sigh.

You do what you haven’t done in ages: you enjoy a relaxing dream and allow yourself to rest.

#the sandman #morpheus x reader #dream x reader #sandman x reader #dream of the endless x reader #dream of the endless #my writing #my sandman fics

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sweatermuppet · 9 months

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sorry if you've been asked this before but have you gone to college or are you interested? a lot of my fav writers went to pretty prestigious places and have masters or phds etc and i was the type of person who never thought i'd be able to go to school for writing (or anything really) but i'm gonna try this upcoming school year. would love any insight you have if any <3

my feelings on further education for writing are complicated, but to put it out there at the top: i did not go to college & do not consider it necessary to be published

i did not apply to college in high school, which was highly controversial according to teachers, who insisted i need to at least look. i had some poor grades (almost failed creative writing, almost failed sophomore english) & did not attend many after school programs. i skipped class, had a suspension on record for fighting, & i was deeply deeply clinically depressed. i was in therapy, on medication, & could not see that another few years of school would suit me, especially because i was trying to come out as trans in a small school & that exhausted & despaired me. i did not have savings, scholarship offers, & my parents had told me since childhood that any secondary education would be my responsibility

i would like to go to college now i think, or at least attend more workshops & small classes for poetry & fiction, but i still feel it is very unlikely. education costs are too high for me to consider it an agreeable sacrifice for those experiences & connections. if i had the chance to go somewhere for writing, it would have to be within a financial margin that seemingly does not exist for current college costs & i refuse to take out loans, especially when i would rather work a day job & further my transition

i think it is very possible to educate yourself. there are lots of online resources available that can provide you with lessons, prompts, readings, & "homework". one key element, that ive discussed with other published friends, is that doing it alone... means you are that: alone. there is a lot of value in being taught by someone or someones who can answer your questions & give you a uniquely human perspective. i have taught myself a lot privately, but it does come with a sometimes crushing distance that can feel downright alienating, if not discouraging. there is a thrill in discussing poetry in a group that cannot be replicated in solitude

on the other hand, i think experiences cannot be taught in a classroom. to write, you must live first. you have to have material & it is difficult to craft material when you are entirely occupied with study. heartbreak, loss, love, wonder, can all happen during college, & even college is its own experience, but i do think there is a lot of overlooked value in people who just do... people things without wondering if it'll make a good poem

when i went to a writing retreat last year, i was the only man to attend (or ever apply!) & the only person in the group to not have gone to, or actively be in, college. i was torn between thinking i was an outsider, because everyone around me was "better educated" & feeling like id accomplished something all on my own

so... at the end of the day, i think it is entirely personal whether someone goes to college for writing. i know people who have gone & loved it & others who did not find it useful. i think these depend upon yourself, the school, your style, what you're hoping to achieve, etc. i think most of all it's deeply important to learn with other people when you can, to talk to people about poetry, to go to readings & subscribe to journals & visit libraries & take notes. how that is done is up to you

#devotedbunny #sorry that this is six million pages long. i just have a lot of thoughts about it

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bfpnola · 3 months

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I haven't been involved with bfp and only vaguely know a few things of what happened but I've really appreciated your work even though I never joined as a volunteer. I'm very sorry to see you close, though I understand and support the need to. Will there be any more details on what happens to BFP? Will your blog still exist? Is the organization stopping all activities but keeping up the library? (sorry for all the questions, I hope they dont come across in a hostile way)

hi sweetheart! thanks for the questions, you’re all good, i don’t mind. /genuine

all activities, including updating the library, will cease this sunday, february 4, 2024.

this blog will stay up although i doubt it’ll be nearly as active considering i’m the only person running it. i’ve also left the metalheadsforblacklivesmatter blog due to emotional laborious and racialized discussions months ago with the adult that runs it, so im not sure how far our posts will reach anyways now. i’ll be sure to support yalls mutual aid posts though, pinky promise. and i’ll still be active on my personal blog @reaux07 and especially on my instagram reaux07 to disseminate political education content. (considering tiktok, as encouraged by my peers, but im nervous about filming!)

the library will still definitely be available but all the renovations we were doing will essentially be frozen in time, which i apologize for. it’s just too difficult to keep up with only a few actually committed hands, you know? that “over 3,000 free resources” advertised was never an exaggeration, i really did go through and count them all up. and that was the number from 2022! it’s just too much :(

since all activities will cease tomorrow, all of our youth are officially released from their volunteer duties. those of us who are close have already begun a new project to heal, continue to learn, and stay close though :) those outside of that circle, who have made it difficult to be our authentic selves, will walk a separate path, and i wish them the best.

if you have any more questions, feel free to send them in. i’ll get to them when i can 🫂

— reaux (she/they)

#reaux answers

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magnificentmicrowave · 6 months

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Okay genuine question now, but how do you handle stress and pressure whenever you're stuck with a drawing? Like what do you do when a specific part of it looks irregular, an no matter what you do it'll always look off or bad? I have this problem while drawing eyes, and sometimes it works on a simple angle, and other times they just look inhuman, and terrible, and no matter how many times I redraw them it keeps getting worse. Also, here's your egg girl smoking the fattest dooby, since I blew your ask box with that boob question, sorry!

HOOOOLY FUCK she's absolutely schpuffin on that shit. thank you anyway this is a really good question and something i feel very strongly about. here is where i will go on a rant

in general when people are giving art advice, it's easy to hyperfocus on the technical aspects of improvement, but i think it is just as pertinent if not moreso to put an emphasis on improving your mental as far as art is concerned. i had artblock that lasted far too long, and lost years of potential art progress just because my mental towards art was just completely wrong. you NEEEEEED to enjoy and want to do what you're doing or else you'll start associating the act of art with all those bad feelings. self-discipline is also important to an extent, but anyway

with all that being said, concerning your specific problem i think there are a couple main pointers that i think more people starting out in art should know: frustration and lack of confidence in your lines comes from lack of understanding. when you are struggling to define or place lines in the right place, all that means is you lack the right resources in your mental library to recreate those details in your art. polishing a turd, no matter what you do, will only get you a shiny turd!! to that end, use references, so that your art can have a solid skeleton based in reality for you to build on. for the love of GOD please use references. sometimes i'll overlay an image and trace it just so i can get a good idea of how the limbs are working in space. as a quick example:

i'm not going to go all in on this specific process, but my point is: don't feel ashamed to use references, trace to learn, or use whatever tools at your disposal you may have. not everyone can be kim jung gi and have an insanely large mental library, so don't feel bad about not being able to draw your art 100% from memory. when you're drawing the same line over and over you're practically gambling points of your own sanity away in the hopes that the right lines will magically appear. sometimes you just gotta step away and take a mental reset, or trash the piece altogether. that's another thing, don't be too attached to every little doodle you make, not every piece you work on is supposed to be a new magnum opus.

this was more philosophical than technical advice but hope this helps :) i don't want anyone else to go thru the years of artblock that i did bashing my head against the mental wall that i was. take things at your own pace and, most importantly, enjoy what ya doin,

tl;dr: frustration comes from lack of understanding, use more refs, don't feel bad about trashing WIPs

#ask #art by op #yuno #all this coming from me must sound real pretentious considering im just drawing this dickhead catgirl over and over #trust me i went to art school :^)

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mirr0r-image · 8 months

Text

September 11

Hey Friends! I know this is kind of a random thing to post about, but I felt like I should.

If you don't know, today is September 11th, the 22nd anniversary of the 9/11 attacks in America on September 11, 2001. Nearly 3,000 people died just in the attacks, with hundreds of others sick and dead because of the amount of toxic air and debris released into lower Manhattan after the crashes.

The World Trade Center's North building was hit first, followed by the south building, then the Pentagon, then a field in Shanksville, Pennsylvania. They were hit by planes piloted by members of al-Qaeda, an Islamic extremist terrorist group formed by Osama bin Laden, along with some others.

Because this group couldn't defeat America military-wise, they instead set their sights on symbols and iconic American monuments. Members hijacked these four flights to attack these various targets representing America's power.

There was only one plane that didn't land were it was meant to. This plane crashed in a field in Pennsylvania. We aren't sure were it was meant to go, but there's a theory that it was meant to land on the Capitol building because it is a sign of America's Legislative power. Even though we don't know for sure where this plane was meant for, what's important is that it didn't. Because of the bravery of the people on that flight who fought back against the hijackers, many lives were saved. Unfortunately, everyone on that flight died.

Other people who should absolutely be mentioned are the First Responders involved. During the attacks, after the attacks, and everywhere in between, First Responders came from all over America to help the victims of these attacks.

We owe a lot to the dedicated men and women who worked day and night to save hundreds of lives.

It's important to say that even though the attacks were committed by Islamic extremists, NOT ALL MUSLIMS ARE AT FAULT. The people who attacked were extremists, who, like their name suggests, have extreme views. This is, in my opinion, the other side of the tragedy surrounding 9/11. After the attacks, people were very hateful towards Muslims and Muslim-Americans in general, not usually making any distinction between neighbors and friends and the people who actually attacked America.

All in all, 9/11 was tragedy on many levels. There's lots of others things to be said and aspects I haven't covered. If you want, you can check out the websites/resources linked below to read more. If you're a 9/11 victim or the family of one, I offer my condolences and hope that you're able to feel hope even today, on the anniversary of this tragedy. If there's something I left out, or something I said wrong, I'm really sorry. I don't want to offend someone by this, only commemorate and remember this day for what it is.

If you want to learn more about 9/11, I would suggest---

1. CNN10; they released a video today with some good information, mostly about the 9/11 memorial in New York.

2. The 9/11 Memorial website; there's a lot of information including ways to get connected/help with the efforts to help people learn about 9/11.

3. Ground Zero by Alan Gratz; if you didn't know Alan Gratz is a writer who writes really deep, meaningful, and slightly gore-y books about tragedies. The books are gore-y for a reason, they really demonstrate the true tragedy and this book made me cry like five different times throughout reading it. It's on Libby and a bunch of other reading websites and local libraries if you want to read it. I highly recommend it. -> (TW: blood, fire, angst, wounds, death, etc. If you're under 13, I suggest asking a parent to read this with you)

4. The National Archives; I haven't read through this entire website because it's super massive, but if you look at the side of the page there's a place that says 'Contents' and there's a ton of resources there too.

#9/11 #22nd anniversary #september 11 #twin towers #remember today #world trade center #memorial

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nothorses · 10 months

Note

Sorry you’re getting all this nonsense. I was wondering if you had any advice for homeschooling well and for getting social opportunities for a homeschooled child. My partner and I don’t have children yet, but the school in this town is notoriously awful to nd and queer children (we’re both autistic so if we have a kid they probably will be too, and we don’t want them mistreated because we’re queer either), and the only other option is catholic school (absolutely not), so we’ve talked about homeschooling when it comes time, but I want to make sure to do what’s best. I know you’re not a homeschooling expert but I do value your opinions.

Oooh, this is a good question!

I think the first thing might just be some imagining: what's your philosophy of education? What do you think the goal of education, or of your teaching specifically, should be?

You don't need to have a clear or singular answer here, but you should consider this enough that you can identify when something aligns or contradicts with what you think is important (it's also good to keep this relatively open-ended; I've written three separate papers on this and taken two classes dedicated to it specifically, and my philosophy of ed still shifts around).

Then the groundwork. I'd see if you can find some resources and connections in your area:

Other people who are homeschooling & who's goals align with yours

Educational resources like one-off classes, day camps, afterschool care and extracurriculars, museums/activity centers, libraries, etc.

Various experts you can connect with; both people who know education generally and can help you long-term, and people who just… know stuff that they could potentially teach your kid(s) directly.

Coming up with a structure for it is probably not something you want to prioritize right away, and I honestly don't have a lot of homeschool-specific info for you there, either. But I would start with looking into the regulations & what's required, and connecting with folks who have more experience.

I imagine that fighting isolation is gonna be a constant thing, and I would just... really encourage you not to try to do this alone. You don't need to be everything, know everything, or do everything, and it'll be actively worse for everyone if you try. (I assume you won't bc you're already reaching out for info, but I think it's important to say anyway!)

One of the things public school really has going for it is the community and social aspect- and yes, you wanna make sure your kid gets social opportunities, but the teachers and adults there benefit from it too. Good teachers have big networks of materials and people to learn from and collaborate with, and they're always learning & evolving their practice.

And to that end, I recommend reading (or just skimming, if that's all you have time for):

Bellous, 2001, Should We Teach Students to Resist?

Simpson, The Relationship of Educational Theory, Practice, and Research

Bai, Cultivating Democratic Citizenship: Towards Intersubjectivity

Sharp, The Community of Inquiry: Education for Democracy

Rogoff, 2016, The Organization of Informal Learning

Russel, et. al., 2013, Informal learning organizations as part of an educational ecology

And you're welcome to the rest of the ed library, though I know the size can be kinda overwhelming. Honestly, I'd suggest just throwing a keyword in that interests you, and then skimming whatever pops out. It's all gonna be "meta"- about teaching rather than any actual material to teach- but that stuff is arguably more important when you're planning. (ex: philosophy, informal, democracy, disability, indigenous, white supremacy, etc.)

A couple of other concepts I would look into, which should be a little more practical:

Universal Design for Learning (UDL)

Project-Based Learning

Social-Emotional Learning (SEL)

Place-Based Learning

And last note: if there's an environmental ed camp anywhere near you, I really urge you to look into it & consider sending your kids there, if you're able! I'm a little biased, but honestly it's one of the most important (and fun) education experiences anyone gets to have, and it's a bummer that homeschooled kids tend to miss out on that.

Best of luck!! And feel free to hit me up again if you have any other questions or want any more recs, this is absolutely my jam.

#education #homeschool #homeschooling #home school

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aliferous-ly · 4 months

Note

fae!tango for the swap thing!!!

Tango considered himself a reasonable guy. With so many hybrids in hermitcraft, a person must learn to tamp down on their instincts. And Tango held pride on how he managed to maneuver through social interactions without too-terrible incidents.

(Well -- how was he to know that Bdub's moss wasn't for eating? There was dew on it and everything!)

Regardless, Tango learned to funnel his urges into quieter outlets. Such as filling FalseBeans with fresh copper at every chance he got. It soothed something deep within him, being able to support his friends.

Only… once he wasn't careful enough, and…

"You're the copper fairy!" False exclaimed. Tango jumped, copper tumbling from long fingers, and turned guiltily.

"Who, me? Noooo," Tango said. He waved his hands as a gesture of innocence. "I'm buying copper! Can't you see?"

"Uhuh," False said, raising an eyebrow. "Buying copper. A nearly limitless resource for you. With all those diamonds you definitely have."

"Well, you didn't have to call me poor on top of all that," Tango said.

False laughed. "Sorry. But hey, thank you! I really appreciate it."

Tango meant to say, for what? I'm totally just stealing your copper. My copper farm broke. Or maybe he meant to say, aw, false, no problem! Hermits helping hermits.

Or even, just build something for decked out and call it even!

Instead, what came out of his mouth was an icy cold, "excuse me?"

False's smile slipped as she stopped, startled. "What?"

Tango tried to lasso the offense coursing through his veins to no avail. His ears flicked in irritation. "Excuse me?"

Bewildered, False just stared at him. "I just… thanks for being my copper fairy? That's it? Tango, what…?"

His hackles raised further. Tango released an almighty huff, throwing his hands in the air. Hopeless.

"Whatever. See you around," Tango said, rolling his eyes. He extended his wings and took off without another word. My copper fairy. The absolute audacity of False to assume that Tango did it as some sort of -- some sort of servitude! Like Tango was just there to order around, ohhh look at the faery see him flutter about!

Tango traveled straight to the copper farm. He had half a mind to destroy it, then had a better idea: he would get so much copper that False would beg for more for her shop! She'd be indebted to him, and wouldn't that feel awful, Miss False Symmetry.

He was several hours into grinding copper when he received the message.

[FalseSymmetry] whispered to [TangoTek]: meet at spawn village?

[TangoTek[ whispered to [FalseSymmetry]: no

[TangoTek] whispered to [FalseSymmetry]: nether hub, library

[FalseSymmetry] whispered to [TangoTek]: alright

Tango entered his astral library and felt immediately right at home, because he was home. This was his space that he built for the hermits, a delightful hub of travel, something that everyone needed. It reeked of Tango's magic in every block.

The uncomfortable buzz in Tango's chest settled somewhat as he entered the bookshelves. He considered building a throne out of copper, but decided that would be a bit much. He still loved his friend, after all. He might lean into being petty for someone else, but not False.

False arrived shortly after. Wordlessly, she set up a small table and chairs before placing a cake in the center.

"This is for you," False said. She smiled, then bowed. "My copper fairy."

Tango blinked. She spoke the words as one might speak to a King.

He examined the cake, then peered at a still-bowing False. The wrongness was righted, and Tango took a bite of the cake. He hummed happily.

"You are forgiven," Tango said. Then he frowned.

He looked at the cake, then gazed at False, who hadn't risen yet. Discomfort plucked at his ribcage. "You're not my servant."

"And you're not mine," False added. She rose to her full height.

Tango winced. "I… know that. I know that."

"Of course," False said calmly. "I should have been more careful."

"Yes," Tango said. He groaned, rubbing his eyes. "I know you, it shouldn't be an issue."

"Tango," False said pointedly. Tango peered at her from between his fingers.

"I should have been more careful," False repeated. She smiled, eyes crinkling at the corners. "Your copper is far better than any other hermits."

"It is, isn't it?" Tango preened, despite knowing that his copper wasn't any different than the other's. "Only the best for Falsey!"

False laughed.

Tango grinned, and that horrible gut-wrenching feeling finally vanished. Sure, he should know that his friends would never call him into servitude. But it felt great to be properly acknowledged.

Tango ate some more cake.

Yeah, it felt pretty great.

#ask games #fae tango #tangotek #hermitblr #IDK i really wanted to write abotu how weird tango would look but this came out instead. lol. lmao even #anyway without his glamour tango looks weird as FUCK #and hes' still short. short in every universe #anyway. i love tango bc he's so . NORMAL. he's so normal guy coded. but he's also just a creature.#so tango being chill vs the fae in him being like bitch WHAT did you just SAY to me?????#i can imagine that he's normally ok with being thanked. false just caught him on an off day #normally he'd just get all huffy and give them the cold shoulder for a bit #here he was a bit more. offended #thank you for the ask!#<3333

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puffpasstea · 1 year

Note

I don’t know if you’ve done anything like this before, but I’d like to request a blurb about Matilda dealing with seasonal depression

Hi, lovely. Thank you for this! I've actually never written about this before, so here you go! I hope you like it. Please let me know what you think!! Sorry it's on the longer side.

A/N: Consider this the first Satellite extra :D A little glimpse of their new relationship.

Warnings: mentions of mental illness, including anxiety and depression. Please read with caution. If you struggle with, or relate to this, please be kind to yourself. I'm always here if you wanna chat. I'm literally writing this from bed instead of getting up and starting my day, so, trust me, I get it.

---

September has always signaled the beginnings a difficult time for me. Even though, as a bookish academic, it’s often filled with excitement and anticipation for the new semester, especially with my job at the library. Getting new books in, watching new students come by for orientation and discover the many wonders of our resources: archived materials, inter-library loan programs, journals, and rare books collections. Whenever work slowed down over the summer, I tended to struggle with my mental health. Without the structure of a predictable routine and a busy schedule to keep my mind occupied, and without the sense of purpose and connection to others that the job gave me, depressive episodes generally took over quickly. So, the fall semester was always a welcome reprieve by the time that it rolled around. But even that reprieve never lasted long enough. As soon as the months got colder, the sun set earlier, daylight savings hours crept in, I would find myself right back where I’d started. Feeling helpless against my own mind.

I have always known this about myself though I haven’t always understood it. Having grown up on the warmer side of the country, I was thrilled when I finally got to go away to college. Not only because it meant I got to escape the life that has always held me back, but because I was finally going somewhere snow would actually fall. My first ever winter was exciting. In a historic blizzard that shut down the entire state, I was living my dreams. My Jane Austen course kept canceling classes cuz campus was shut down. I got to start a fireplace, curl up on the dusty couch that I’d bought second hand when I moved out, and look out the window as inches of snow pilled out the driveway, coffee in one hand, and Austen’s Persuasion in another. For a socially-anxious introvert, that was the dream. Or so I thought. Unexpectedly, though, the novelty of it all soon wore off. And the depression set in. I’ve dreaded it ever since.

Even when the sun was shining and everyone was out and about, it still took a lot of effort and energy out of me to actually try and live my life. So with below freezing temperatures, mostly gloomy clouds for months on end, depression followed me around even from the beginning of the day when I would wake up and the sun would still be down at fucking 7 am. When my first ever therapist used the term “Seasonal Affective Disorder,” I was both surprised and relieved. Surprised to learn that this was a scientific phenomenon that was proven to happen, and happened to others too, and relieved that I wasn’t just dead inside, incapable of experiencing joy. Even with my growing understanding of my mental health, though, deep down inside, I always held onto a naive idea that my self-inflicted isolation was partly to blame; that the reason I failed to get out of bed most days and brave the elements for five minutes of sunshine and a brisk walk that would "do me wonders" is because I had no one to do that with. No friend I enjoyed the company of enough to MAKE me want to go out, no partner to go out with. As any mental health professional would tell you, that’s not a healthy way of thinking. And I would soon find that out.

Harry, on the other hand, LOVED winter. He has loved it ever since he was a kid, but, I think, his appreciation for this time of year grew exponentially as he got older and became a world-class rockstar. The holiday season was the only time of the year where he was forced to stop working. Even, or especially, when he was touring. His tour schedule was always jam-packed year round. If Harry was on tour, you best believe he was on tour for the majority of the year. Starting in the spring or summer, and going non-stop until the holidays. So, by the time that mid-November rolled around, he was always thinking about going back home to see friends and family, buying Christmas presents, disappearing from public life for a few weeks, getting to be a normal person again; decorating the tree with his mom and sister, making tea and watching holiday movies and eating his mom’s cooking while curled up under a pile of blankets in front of the tv in his mother's living room. It was a time he relished in and looked forward to every year.

I supposed I should’ve expected our differences, even before we got together. But it was one thing to know that we had different experiences about this time of year, and another thing to experience it.

“You wanna go shopping with me this week?” Harry climbed back into his now cold and empty spot in our bed, kissing my forehead and handing me a cup of coffee to subtly inform me that it was time to wake up.

I groaned in acknowledgement, my fingers peering from under the covers to receive the warmth of the drink he’d brought me. This was it. This was my person. The person whose company I’d enjoy enough to put myself through the winter weather, right?

“I saw something at this boutique that I wanna get for Gemma. You know, for Christmas.”

I took a sip of my coffee, avoiding his eager eyes, and mustering a small nod.

This is what I’ve always wanted. I can’t fuck this up now. “S-sure, Harry. I’d love to.” Forcing myself to look back at his expecting face, I willed myself to smile.

“Great! Thanks! We can browse for you too, if you’d like.” Harry shuffled under the covers, throwing an arm around me and pulling me to his side. I didn’t have anyone to buy presents for.

This whole thing was already wearing me down. I’d made a deliberate effort to change my attitude around this time of year. To will myself into becoming the sort of person who loved the changing of the seasons and celebrated every little thing. It seemed doable at first. September was fine. I enjoyed the back-to-school rush, especially with my new job as a college professor. It was an excuse for me to indulge in old habits: back to school shopping, new stationary, elaborate pen collections, pretty notebooks and highlighters. Plus, the first half of September is technically still summer. Even when the weather did start to change, it was changing from unbearably humid and warm, to tolerable and breezy. I could go for runs outside. I could walk down to the coffeeshop to get myself and Harry some coffee in morning. I found that I handled it okay. This sense of control gave me some hope that perhaps all needed was the motivation to do things differently.

By October, things felt a bit more challenging, but, determined to be the dutiful and supportive girlfriend, I participated in the pumpkin-spice-everything craze. Got Harry a pumpkin pie scented candle to take on tour with him, bought the Halloween decor, assisted in the Gucci meetings for Harryween, watched and took pictures of Harry carving pumpkins with his god-children. But all of that had soon burnt me out. Thanksgiving was in a week, and Harry was determined to celebrate with me and with his American friends, even though, I know for a fact that he has no sentimental tradition attached to this holiday; he couldn't possibly; England doesn’t even have thanksgiving! And we still had Christmas and new years to get through. I didn’t know if I could keep faking it much longer.

Truthfully, I knew that if I told Harry, he’d be understanding and supportive. But I desperately wanted this to be the start of a new chapter of my life. Plus, I didn’t want him to be self-conscious about the things that he enjoyed just because I felt differently. Besides, our relationship was still new. I wanted to get to know his friends and spend time with the people who are important to him, even if it meant getting out of my comfort zone. Perhaps that's what I need to grow into a winter-wonderland-loving person. I just need to push through it all and come out on the other side a warm and fuzzy person.

“I don’t wanna push, but you still haven’t given me an answer.” Harry mumbled against the side of my head, his arm still around my shoulder.

“I just said I’d go shopping with you, Harry.”

“Not about that! About thanksgiving.”

“Oh.” I dreaded this conversation.

“The Azoffs usually have this gigantic party. Catered, people from out of town, that sort of thing. But I know that’s not your scene. We don’t have to do that this year.”

“If you wanna go- I could-“

“Nah. Honestly, I’d rather just do something with the band.”

“Mitch is the only American.” I stated a bit too aggressively.

“Right. Mitch actually doesn’t care.” Harry giggled. “But it’s an excuse to be together. Plus, what about you?”

Tell him. Tell him. Tell him. Now's your chance. Just tell him.

“W-what about me?” I set my mug down on the bedside table, growing uncomfortable under Harry’s gaze.

“You’re American. Don’t you care? Come to think of it, you’ve never really told me anything about your holiday plans. Do you usually go back home, or?”

“I usually find every reason on the planet not to.”

It was true, I often worked on thanksgiving, to avoid having to go back to a place where I felt I didn’t belong and had no reason to be. And to avoid staying home in my cold and empty apartment.

“Cuz, your family- oh-I’m sorry. I should’ve known - I-“

“Stop, Harry. It’s okay.” His concern was always sweet.

***

“Ready to go?” Harry peeked his head into the bathroom and watched me touch up my makeup. He stepped forward to help me buckle my necklace as he saw me struggle to put it on by myself. Kissing the side of my neck, he wrapped his arms around my waist and whispered in my ear, “I made us a dinner reservation at that French restaurant you like.”

I saw from his reflection in the mirror that he'd picked up on me tensing up in his arms.

“You made dinner plans?” I tilted my head upwards to look at him. “Without telling me?”

“This is me telling you now.” Harry’s arms withdrew. He stood up straighter, his presence now felt different, like he was towering over me. I felt suffocated.

“I didn’t know this was a dinner thing! I thought it was just a shopping thing. Now I have to-“

“Have to what, Matilda? Why does it matter what kind of ‘thing’ it is?" I detected a hint of mockery in his voice. Whether he meant it, or I was overthinking, I wasn't sure. "Did you have other plans for dinner? I can cancel the reservation. It’s no big deal. I just thought you might not wanna come home and cook after a long day of being out and about. I was trying to think ahead.”

“Long day? What on earth- I thought we were stepping out to go grab Gemma’s gift! Why would that take all day?” I turned around to face him. He looked baffled.

“Well, we are. But I’m not just buying Gemma a gift, am I? There’s other people I want to buy for. Plus, we haven’t been out, just the two of us, in ages. Figured we could make a day-“

“You make all these plans and you never consult me!”

I squeezed past Harry to exit the bathroom.

“Where are you going?” He trailed after me, watching me go into the bedroom and begin to undress, kicking me shoes off and unzipping my dress.

“What’re you doing now?”

"Changing."

"Why?" Harry shrugged.

“I’m not going.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. I’m not going. You go. Get a million gifts for a million people, eat French food, make a day of it. Go. Go on. Just leave me out of it.”

“I’m confused. Are you being serious, or is this a joke, cuz if it is, I don’t get it….”

“I’m not kidding, Harry. Go. Hurry or you’ll miss your reservation.”

***

Harry was gone all day. And it didn’t make sense that I was mad. I was the one who told him to go. But the truth is, I regretted it as soon as the words came out of my mouth. I hated that depression made me irritable. I scrolled my phone through tearful eyes to confirm: under “symptoms of depression,” alongside “loss of appetite” and “mood swings,” there it was, “irritability.” I knew it. I’ve been living it first hand, for years. It just felt cruel and downright evil when it affected someone other than myself. It wasn’t Harry’s fault. He was being normal; doing normal people things. I’d snapped at him for no good reason. I wished he’d come home already. I wished I could go back in time and stop myself from being such a jerk to him. But the truth is, I have been feeling drained lately, and springing a whole day's worth of plans on me like this made me anxious. I didn't like that about myself. I didn't like that my default reaction to spontaneity was panic. I wished I could be the sort of person who didn't need an advanced warning and didn't need to mentally prepare herself for things before they happened. But this was the reality. I needed to plan things out to feel comfortable. And Harry was okay with not knowing.

I climbed into bed, turning my heated blanket up, and hiding under the covers. This was the only place I wanted to be today. I curled up and closed my eyes, letting tears fall as I felt my sense of failure fester in my heart. I wanted so badly to be the partner Harry wanted and deserved. I thought I'd managed to do a pretty good job of forcing myself into it. But, now, my act was faltering. There's no pretending after the fit I'd thrown over a fucking dinner reservation.

***

"Wake up, darlin'" Harry's hand shook me gently. "Matilda? you awake?"

my eyes fluttered, blinking away the sleep and looking up at Harry. It took me a second to adjust to the blurry light coming from the bedside lamp that Harry had turned on. When I did, I saw him standing over me, a seemingly infinite number of bags in his hand.

"Oh, you've been crying." Harry's eyes landed on the pile of tissues beside me and the tear stains on my pillow case.

I instantly turned to the other side of the bed, giving my back to him.

I heard the rustle of the bags as Harry set them down, and then felt a dip in the mattress as he sat down down next to me.

"Look at me, honey, please?" he placed a gentle hand on my shoulder urging me to turn around. "Wanna see your pretty eyes."

"sleepy eyes." I mumbled, unsure if he'd heard me.

"Teary eyes?" he countered.

I shook my head, still facing away from him.

"C'mon. You're a terrible liar."

"Don't wanna talk about it, Harry."

"Why not, my love?"

"Cuz I'll just start crying again."

"Aha! so, you admit you've been crying!"

Harry got up and rounded the bed, walking to the other side to look me in the eyes. He crawled onto the bed and squeezed under the sheets, his arms finding my waist and wasted no time in pulling me to him. His lips, locked against mine, felt cold, no doubt from the weather outside. The idea of him being out alone, all cuz I ruined our plans with my mental shit made the regret bubble back up to the surface, I broke down again, crying into Harry's lips, but he didn't budge.

"It's okay, it's okay." his hand traveled from my hips to my back, rubbing it soothingly.

"'M sorry I ruined everything." I squeezed closer, burying my face into his neck my tears staining his shirt, he smelled warm, comforting, his signature cologne clung to the fabric of his clothes.

"you didn't ruin anything, babe."

"yes I did!" I found it easier to speak when my face was hidden from his eyes. " You had this whole day planned for us and I ruined everything."

"S' okay, really. Is' not that important." His hands were still on my back, he squeezed me tighter and it brought me calm. "You didn't feel like goin' out tonight. I shoulda asked first. I'm sorry."

"You did! you did ask, Harry. And I said yes, but-" I felt another wave of tears spill from me.

"But what, honey? What happened? Did I do something? I-"

"No, Harry! It's me. I- I'm tired. All the time I'm tired."

"You work hard. I understand-" He whispered into my ear.

"No! you don't. I'm not tired cuz I've had a long week. I just-"

"Tell me."

"Depressed." Was all I could muster the courage to confess before I broke down again.

Harry's hands momentarily paused before resuming their circular movements across my back when he felt my tears on him again.

"I should've known. I'm so sorry, baby. I can be so insensitive sometimes. I'm sorry."

"I don't wanna be broken. I hate it. I'd do anything to feel normal just once."

"You're not broken-"

"Yes I am! That's why I hate this time of year, I fucking hate it!! It's not enough that I have nobody to celebrate or by presents for and my family isn't the sort of people I want to spend the holidays with, my own brain won't let me have a moment of personal joy, not even by myself!! Everyone loves the holidays, I-"

"You're okay."

"I want to change, Harry. I wanna be better. For you."

"Don't you dare!" Harry forced our bodies apart, enough to look down into my eyes. "don't ever change anything about yourself. Not for me or for anyone else. You're perfect. Just the way you are, do you understand?"

I swallowed, my throat itchy from crying.

"I said do you understand? I mean it!"

I nodded reluctantly.

"Good." Harry pulled me back into his chest, peppering the top of my head with kisses.

"But I wanna work on this. To try and do things differently. I want to." I whispered after a silent moment had passed.

"Fair enough, then. Let's start small. Maybe dip your toes in? with thanksgiving? Doesn't have to be a big thing. Just you and me and Sarah and Mitch. What do you think?"

"I think that's lovely." I smiled, kissing his neck and causing him to giggle. "Can Pauli come too?" I asked and waited for Harry's reply.

"S-sure. If it's not too many people for you."

I kissed his neck again.

"And Ny?"

"If- you want to."

Another kiss.

"And Elin? we can't not invite Elin..."

Harry was laughing now, his chest rising and falling moved me around and I placed another kiss to his neck.

"You sure you wanna do this?"

"Yeah, Harry. I think- with the band- I'll be okay. People I know."

"Thank you for doing this." He kissed my head once again, whispering praises into my ear.

"Sorry I ruined dinner."

Harry slowly wiggled out of my tight hug, rushing to the other side of the room and grabbing a couple of his bags. "You didn't." He said grinning widely and climbing back into bed.

I spotted the French restaurant logo on the containers he'd brought over.

"You got us takeout?"

"Hell yeah. Also don't look in those other bags. Bought your Christmas presents."

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fluff #matilda #harry's house #harry styles blurb #harry styles angst #harry styles writing #satellite #harry styles fic #harry styles fanfic #harry styles x oc

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kingofthewilderwest · 5 months

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I saw your post about #tag linguistics and it was fascinating! I was wondering if you knew any online resources/references describing the phonotactics of different languages for a mostly inexpert audience? When I poke around with my meager googling I tend to only turn up English, but I'd be really curious to see the basic rules laid out for comparison among a few different languages!

Oi! Hey there! ^.^ Hope you're doing well and thanks for the kind words!

Unfortunately I've been out of the academic loop since 2016 and I only remember a handful of resources, most of which aren't inexpert audience friendly(?).

The resource that pops to mind, regardless, is WALS Online - The World Atlas of Language Structures Online. It's a cross-linguistic feature comparison tool. It allows you to generate and investigate global maps based upon a single linguistic feature or multiple features simultaneously. I think it's a cool shortcut because it checks plausibility (for people who might not know interrelatability) on whether a language might have a combination of features. It helps visualize patterns across languages, language families, and regions.

For instance, since we're talking phonotactics, here's the map for syllable structure. Problem is WALS pulls no punches on jargon, and most of the sources it cites are, like, grammars you'd only find in print on a campus library.

On WALS, each language has a page where its features are listed. To learn the details of how the feature manifests, you'd have to use other sources. But WALS at least provides the relevant starting point of individual languages to investigate. Wikipedia ain't... always accurate or comprehensive, of course, in something like linguistics... but it's an easy way to start poking once you know the names of languages you want to snoop at.

You could try your luck with the currently-defunct World Phonotactics Website on the Wayback Machine, though that's not one I know much about, and there is the whole, uh, defunct thing going for it.

I'm sorry I can't be more help!

Nice stopping in, and thanks for the kind words of that viral post. Funny (if typically tumblr) story about that. I posted it eight years ago intentionally at an off hour of night in hopes it'd get two notes and fade into obscurity. That's why it has nicher fandom-specific references; it wasn't anticipated to escape containment, just be a convo between two friends. Yeah oops bwahaha. Gosh I was so energized at the time. Anymore I don't think it holds up remotely, factually, from any academic standing, and the inaccuracies make me twitch, but I doubt most people notice, and I hope it gives people the fun and excitement about linguistics I was feeling. ^.^ Linguistics is so cool!! And I s'pose it's been cool that one of my most-spread posts is nerdy. Oh, alas, science side of tumblr, I was amongst y'all once.

#if some of the more academically active linguists who follow me / are mutuals recall something #please holler [sweats] XD #blabbing Haddock #ask #ask me #phonotactics #linguistics #lingfishtics #non-dragons #spaceshipoftheseus #my job is still in linguistics but I feel like an imposter whoooop shhhhh;hhhhhh

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cheshire-castle-library · 8 months

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hey! this is chance & here’s this week’s prompt. what websites or resources do you use while you write or develop a character/story? what do you think of them and would you recommend them?

Hello!! Been fighting a war of spoons this week, so sorry for the delay with this!

Honestly it would be magical if I had 1 single source I could rely on for writer's research, but Google is generally my starting point. After that here are the places I trust the information of:

Masterclass - there are a surprising number of articles and mini interviews for free written or influenced by the professional writers in the platform. One day I'll pay for the full service if only to hear Mr. Gaiman tell me his perspective on storytelling; but the free articles are really concise and informative for structure

Save the Cat Writes a Novel (its a book but there are references all over the internet to it as well) - definitely don't feel chained to what the method lays out!! But the nuances about what should happen in certain types of beats are a great push when you get stuck!!! But it's a really rigid beat sheet that probably won't 100% adhere to what you need it to be.

Behind the Name - actually discusses meanings and origins of cultural names!! This is a great way to get started or to help carve put a character who is a little too murky to write yet.

The Phrontistry - difficult to navigate on a time crunch since its not made for writers, but ctrl-f a key word helps. This place has lists and lists of DEAD WORDS!! Use it to name shit! Use it learn victorian and old english slang. Use it because you just like words. (By the way, a Phrontistry is "a place meant for thinking", so a Zen garden is a phrontistry!!)

My Uni Library Website - this is a privilege I know, but if you can get access to academic sources on arts and cultures it really changes the way you can respectfully draw inspiration from other cultures!!

4TheWords - this is the ADHD buster! Its down at the time I wrote this, but it's a website that gamifies writing so its not just a timer like in writing sprints, every word you type goes to "defeating a monster". You so quests like any mmo and I've legitimate written over 50k in under 30 days because brain goes into panic "it doesn't have to be good" mode and I can get stuff done! Its not totally free, but the micropurchases are actually micro snd you can earn time as well as buy it. They have to make ends meet so i can't be mad

Writer.bighugelabs.com - ive used this online typewriter for like 5+ years. Lifetime membership is 99$ and it goes to the one guy who made it keeping it running. It's got an offline mode and document history so just as long as you are careful and you preload the tab, you don't need data on your netbook/chromebook/ipad to write. It's no markdown, just words on page, it makes typewriter noises, and it looks like a dos command prompt. If you pay for it, you can customize colours, and ive used it for everything from timed exams to emails to novel chapters.

Obsidian.md - free program you can get as an app or on desktop that lets you make basically your own wiki. I've posted about it for my studies, but you can just make your own wiki about your novel, or choose to write directly into it. It supports markdown and latex-like formulae so I've literally written reports in it.

Also like,,,, don't be afraid to use the blogs of other writers! They have experience you could use. But I try to avoid posts that are "7 tips to write x y z" or "never do p q r when writing" because they just get in my head and are generally highly opinionated and are not objectively correct.

I do use, reblog, and strongly support resource and psa type posts though!! Some beautiful human has been making "ways to write [emotion]" posts on tumblr and that person I would like to kiss. They are useful information-based and example-based posts that are just like "and here are some oprions" instead of giving people who are already prone to second guessing themselves (writers) more things to fear cause them "should i even try, what if im cringe and everyone roasts my work" anxiety. ((If people are gonna roast your work, they will nitpick it apart regardless of whether you reinvented My Immortal or wrote the spiritual successor to This Is How You Lose The Time War, so like,,, please just write @me and everyone else who needs to hear that.))

I also advise at least skimming posts about demographics you are not in, especially the ones about how they want to be represented and how it's appropriate to include that in your narrative structure. If you are not in that demographic, you - by definition - cannot fully understand what it's like to be the people who are. Therefore you should to do some quality research and maybe be willing to ask questions of people to make sure you don't fall into stereotypes/virtue signaling/etc.

Finally, *inhales*: WIKIPEDIA!

Yes anyone can edit it, but you know who does??? Coffee riddled neurodivergent individuals with a passion for that one obscure thing you were shocked to find on Wikipedia.

Use the information as a primer, and then to to the sources and try to track down more specific and more "reliable" information. But Wikipedia is usually enough if you are like designing creatures and stuff like that. I don't need amphibious biology research to design an axolotl-like alien sentient lifeform.

That being said, I'm not going to stay limited to wikipedia when i go to learn about xolotl and the culture that named axolotls in order to make sure i don't just steal one animal and a naming convention but also pay some respect and homage to the spirit of the animal and related irl folklore. But finding relatable and first hand cultural sources is very case by case.

#my big mouth #writeblr #letters from the cheshire castle #i can't remember my tags rn

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howaboutcastiel · 1 year

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If!!! And only if!!!!! You feel like it!!! Could you maybe do hcs or a Drabble about one or 3 of the moon boys with a reader with ocd 👉🏻👈🏻 like she feels self conscious about the weird patterns/habits/aversions she has? Like she can’t scratch down their back during sex and can’t handle spit, or it takes forever to settle into bed because everything needs to feel right

I know you don’t have ocd so maybe this is just hard or weird to write but I often think about the issues my ocd is gonna cause in relationships

Hey babey!!! Happy Hanukkah ❤️

I know you sent a similar ask sooner, I’m sorry I haven’t completed it!!! I will try my bestest to make these HCs accurate, but you’re right that I do not have OCD and I’m sure there will be some inconsistency. Anywhomst…

Lunar Therapy (OCD)

Steven Grant:

Is absolutely not weirded out by strange habits. Hell, the man has so many odd habits of his own that he couldn’t dream of judging you for it. He will ask and try to understand which habits are borne from anxiety, so he knows how to help you through potentially dangerous/harmful compulsions.

He will do whatever he can to accommodate your habits so that you aren’t ever unable to complete your routines, and so that you never end up hurting yourself in the repetition. He also will check in regularly about how your obsessive thoughts are affecting you. He never wants you to hurt in silence.

About the sexy stuff, Steven never wants to ask something of you that you don’t enjoy. All he ever wants is to make you feel good!! (Of course it is, have you seen the man??) No spitting and scratching? No problem.

That being said, he’ll ask a million questions about what you ARE into, then proceed to check out a dozen library books and read a dozen more blogs or online resources about how to do those things to the best of his ability.

As for going to bed. Have you SEEN Steven’s nighttime routine? You’re not going to bother him. Whatever you need, he understands. He’ll buy you one of those fancy stiffness-adjusting beds if he thinks it will help.

Marc Spector

Is kind of scared at first because he feels like anything he does to try and help will only make you feel worse. He asks a million questions, just like Steven, but they’re more tip-toey questions because he wants to understand, but not overstep your boundaries.

He’s a very methodical person, so he’ll take inventory of everything you tell him so he can learn your behaviors. He has an almost formulaic way of interacting with you sometimes, but it’s because he desperately wants to be helpful and never a burden (plus autistic brain sometimes means black and white thinking, coming from experience).

He tries not to mention your compulsions at all unless you’re hurting yourself, or you express to him that you’re self-conscious about them. He thinks no differently of you, and he will tell you this, but he is over-protective and you know it and so does he.

As for sex? Whatever you say, goes. Marc won’t have the long conversation with you that Steven will, but if you tell him no spit, he’ll remember that forever and he won’t do it again. He’ll ask more questions DURING sex to make sure you’re into it, but you’ll never sit down to talk about all your do’s and don’ts.

He’s also willing to have sex whatever way you desire. Because he’s so, so dreadfully horny and touch-starved.

Marc sleeps like the dead. He doesn’t care if you toss and turn or need the room a certain temperature or anything like that. He hits the bed, he’s out like a light. With that said, whatever kind of blankets or mattress you prefer are what he’ll get.

Jake Lockley

Is weird. He’s a weirdo. Have you ever seen him without that stupid hat on? That’s WEIRD.

No seriously, he doesn’t care how strange you think you are. He knows he’s stranger. In fact, normalcy is more uncomfortable for him. He doesn’t want you hiding any of yourself from him, especially the parts that you think are strange.

When Jake loves, he loves completely. He doesn’t just “tolerate” or accept your weird habits as part of you, he LOVES them. He thinks about the peculiar things that you do and he’s charmed.

Like the other two, he’ll make sure that you don’t hurt yourself. Other than that, he treats your compulsions as a fact of life. He’ll even joke with you about them, if you’ll let him.

When it comes to sex, Jake builds your sex life around your comfort foremost. He enjoys sex from very kinky to very vanilla, so whatever is best for you is what he’ll base your intimacy on. He’ll have a big, long conversation about it just like Steven. Admittedly, it will be a much more cheeky conversation than Steven’s more professional one.

Jake will never, ever fall asleep before you. Sometimes, if you aren’t having a cuddle session, he might not even come to bed until he hears your breathing steady. He’s a protector, he’s formed a habit of watching you fall asleep.

So, maybe he’s distressed when you take a long time to go to sleep, but not because he’s bothered or tired. He just wants YOU to have a restful night. He’ll do whatever it takes to make sure it’s restful.

#moon knight #steven grant #marc spector #jake lockley #moon boys #lunar therapy masterlist #lunar therapy

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fumblingmusings · 1 year

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Your writing is so faultless to me i love your portrayals of evryone but if its alright me asking do you have any outside inspirations for your writing from historic books or documentaries? You seem so involved in historic events often I feel I'm right there with you when you describe things but at the same time I'm not from the west and i have no idea where to begin to get a grasp on things. do you have any resouces in particular?

That is absolutely not true regarding my writing I have clunky syntax and I was re-reading a chapter and saw that I accidentally made Gilbert change genders randomly so... typos. You never catch them all... Congratulations Gilbert on transitioning. But thank you. You're so very kind to say so.

I am sorry if I misunderstand, so you're asking about what inspires my writing that isn't taken from history? Because the honest answer is not much. I do genuinely get inspiration from moments in history. I love period dramas. A lot. I don't read as much fiction as I should, and when I do it's historical fiction. I don't really watch much tv... I read Wikipedia pages in my spare time about huge overarching things like International Relations between 1648-1814 and then go down rabbit holes because I then go 'Oh I wonder what Arthur and Francis would have thought of each other at this time'. I like the occasional fantasy and anime. I'm a big DC comic book reader and write fics for one unpopular pairing on my main blog - that's where I got all my writing practice from; I started fanficcing in 2019 really.

In terms of formative 'I am watching one thing but thinking of Hetalia whilst doing so' pieces of media at the moment. Currently it's good old Game of Thrones and House of the Dragon, books and tv both. I am also thoroughly enjoying Trigun Stampede at the moment (a series about one twin with a mother complex who doesn't know he has a brother complex and the other twin who has a brother complex but doesn't know he has a mother complex).

I do cheat. I work for a University Archive so I have full access to the course readings and the library resources for the taught courses. A lot of Universities actually have their reading lists online. So I just pretend I am a student and have a wee nosey and see what topics and themes I want to read more about, which ones catch my eyes. I may also borrow the books from the University Library itself. I may in fact be that asshole who has your essential reading for that seminar out because oooh isn't Adam Ferguson's opinions on man as a social creature fascinating. I have a particular love for International Relations, so I automatically go towards those topics rather than things like social history. Neither is bad, it's just something I've learned I enjoy after so many years of studying. The former just tends to make for an easier narrative driven read, that's all.

Having said that. A lot of unis also just list books that they think are interesting and that people maybe would like to read. Rather wholesome. Many also make available their specific readings for their courses. For example, I like to go to UCL's website and see what History topics they cover on their website.

Then get very excited, for example, when I see say Transformation of Britain, 1547-1707, so I follow the links and see what they recommend. The University of Reading also has a very good list, as does the University of Edinburgh. These things make me go nuts - they lay it all out for you, and you don't have to pay a penny for the lists. Teach yourself ha!!! Some of the sources are available online, some you may have to dig around and see if a library has them. Some you sigh mournfully and only imagine what kind of information is contained within.

This is probably so unhelpful orz. Forgive my babbles.

EDIT: Oh! Music! I'm such a dumbo. I do use music quite a lot for inspiration. I don't have playlists but I do have songs and scores that I associate with certain characters for sure. They help a lot with moods and ~vibes~

#if i haven't answered your question do let me know i'm frightened i misunderstood #q&a

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