#my favourite senior citizen <3
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Opposite Ends
Chapter Ten - Doomed love
C1 | C2 | C3 | C4 | C5 | C6 | C7 | C8 | C9 | C11 | C12 | C13 pt1 | C13 pt 2 |
Chapter Eleven is out now, enjoy Sunflowers x 🌻
Pairing | Eddie x Female reader 18+. Steve x Robin x Female reader platonic friendship
Series summary | Dustins older sister got brought into the group during the events of Starcourt mall, 3 months on she's in her senior year and the kids are starting high school. After everything that went down she feels that she has to keep them safe at all costs, that includes keeping them way from the charismatic 'freak' Eddie Munson that runs a club based on their favourite game. They've both hated each other since freshman year -with good reason-, but when keeping distance between the kids and Eddie means putting herself in the firing line, boundaries get blurred, intentions get lost & the heart speaks louder than the brain.
The story is told from both Y/N & Eddies point of view.
What to expect | Slow burn enemies to lovers, Angst - with a happy ending (fix-it-fic if you will), fluff & smut (in the later chapters). 18+ to read this story.
Series Warnings | Mentions of abuse, drug use, 18+ smut content
Chapter word count | 9 K Word Count
Chapter warnings | Nothing too out there in this chapter
As always, any & all comments/reblogs are most appreciated - Thankyou, P. x 🌿
Authors Note | Again thank you for your patience, and as always thank you for reading! I did have to split this chapter up because we had a 20 k + word count but that's great news because 11 will be out in a couple of days! On top of everything else I had some pretty serious writers block but Im back & better than ever - at least I think so, let me know what you all think!
Eddie | March 1986
I didn’t walk around Hawkins with the intention of having my guard up all the time against almost everyone, it had just happened. When the entitled, judgemental residents of the town had taken one look at my ripped jeans, listened to the metal music blasting from my van and watched the fantasy game that my DnD club played that they deemed as ‘satanic’, and decided that I wasn’t worth more than the dirt beneath their shoes, it hadn’t exactly shaped me into a model citizen.
But the feeling of being an outcast my entire life had sat fine with me; I had no interest in anyone in the small town I’d grown up in. They were all carbon copies of their parents, and their parents before them, there wasn’t anyone worth being interested in.
Until she came along.
Henderson had strutted into my life like I didn’t have a choice, knocking down every single solid wall I’d spent years building up like they were made of feathers, even before she turned them into dust with each glance of her bright eyes and a hint of her sweet smile that she threw in my direction, she had been unconsciously destroying them with every death stare and exasperated sigh, breaking me down with every addictive movement of her.
She was meant for me, every hate filled eyeroll and love filled smile was ingrained on my soul in marks that would last a lifetime.
I’d never stood a chance.
I never thought I would find myself completely and utterly consumed by another until I found her, or perhaps it was the other way around and she’d found – no saved - me.
She’d taken my hand and led me out of the darkness of my own corruption and showed me that, whatever our souls are made of, however they were shaped from the loud, hurtful world around us…
…hers and mine were the same, broken halves of the same blooming whole.
I’d loved her from the moment I’d met her, I just hadn’t known it yet.
And now I was never going to be able to tell her.
In the three months since running into her at the Hideout, when we had both been trying to drown our sorrows over each other, we’d spent almost every day inseparable from each other. There had been a regular post-school afternoon once at my trailer when I had almost told her I loved her, and then I had been dying to tell her every day since.
“You’re an idiot Eddie Munson.” She laughed, smacking her hands against my bare chest as I nestled into the crook of her neck, tickling her through the thin sheets twisted between us.
“Unfortunately for you, I’m your idiot.” She wriggled under my arms as I found her sweet spot, making her beg for mercy as I rolled over and pulled her on top of me. The setting sun that shone through my bedroom window sparkled magnificently in her hair, bringing out vibrant colours that weren’t usually there. The glittering sunlight brightened around her silhouette as a light breeze ruffled the stray whispers of hair falling into her face, furthering my suspicion that she was an angle.
As she laid naked, pressed against me, she certainly had the angelic look to pull it off.
“And I am entirely okay with that.” Resting her chin forward on my chest so that I had to tuck mine to still stare into her eyes, she pouted attractively.
“How did we get here?” I breathed into the warm air, my thoughts falling back to us in our first Calculus class at the beginning of my third and her first senior year. “I used to hate you; you know.” I couldn’t ever remember or even fathom myself feeling any type of way that wasn’t absolute reverence towards the perfect creature in my hands.
“If I remember correctly Munson, the feeling was extremely mutual.” Her smile was wide and carefree, her body pressed into me in criminal ways as her frame shook with laughter. Everything about y/n healed my soul, and although my only vice was weed, I was no stranger to the occasional dangerous party drug, but even their temptations cowered in the hulking shadows of Y/n's etherealness.
“College will still be there y’know?” I blurted out suddenly, tightening my arms around her as the thought of losing her punctured my chest painfully.
“What do you mean?” Her brows furrowed in confusion cutely, I smoothed the creases with my thumb as I traced light patterns along her spine.
“Come with me.” I stated, a sense of peace flowing over me as I realised it to be the only thing I would truly ever want, I’d been a fool to think I could walk away from her now, only three months in and she already had me willing to stalk the ends of the earth for her, God knows what kind of state she’d have me in by the end of the school year.
“Be serious.” She scoffed; her eyes searched my face for a glimmer of falseness.
“I am. Everywhere. Travel. We’ll travel everywhere, and we’ll fuck in every state and take a photo of it! I don’t want to forget a single moment with you.” I pressed my lips against hers ferociously, pulling away when her moans became too distracting, refusing to let our conversation be derailed.
“Come with me… please. A year or two, it won’t make a difference.” I begged, letting my excitement flare on my face, not even contemplating the very real possibility of her saying no.
“Okay.” She didn’t miss a beat, determination and excitement reflecting in her own features now as I pulled back, shocked.
“Really?” I laughed disbelievingly, doubting that I had earned the right kind of karma to have y/n in my life.
“Don’t give me a chance to change my mind Edward.” She warned, rolling to the side as she slipped from my arms, pulling my Hellfire t-shirt over her loose hair. I bit my cheek as I watched her strut over to my desk, my shirt barely covering her perfect ass as she bent down to retrieve the bud stashed away in the top draw.
“How are you real?” I asked, watching carefully as she sat back into my desk chair, rolling a fat joint for the both of us between her deft fingers, waiting for her perfect form to burst into a cloud of air.
“Don’t I feel real?” She laughed.
“Incredibly.” I shot back, wiggling my brows suggestively.
“You are damn near perfection” I promised and laughed as she broke off into a giggle.
“Near?” She gasped; feigning being hurt over my careless words.
“Well until you’re in my arms again how can I ever be sure you’re real?” I held them back out for her expectantly, but she dropped the rolling paper as she gasped out in pain this time. I flew from the bed instantly, tearing the sheets out of my way as I stumbled in my haste to get to her.
“Another one?” I murmured concerningly, watching her face contort as she pressed her fists into her temples. She’d been getting relentless headaches, their appearances increasing over the last few weeks. The only thing that seemed to help was when I played my guitar for her, I already had my hand outstretched towards my acoustic one when her nails traced the skin on my arm.
“I’m okay, this one wasn’t too bad” She smiled, placing her warm, soft palm against my cheek before turning away to re roll the joint. Even though she’d touched me a thousand times, the feeling of her still shot hot, fiery needs of desire and nerves through me.
I needed her, and not in a sexual or even romantic way, I needed y/n like I need air to breathe, she was the only one who had walked into my life where I hadn’t spent a second worrying that she was about to walk right back out of it. Even my uncle Wayne, I still had nights where I woke up in a panic that I would find he had abandoned me like the rest of my family, but the suffocating thought never crossed my mind with y/n.
She was my rock in a raging storm, the safe embrace of warm sheets after a hard day, the only arms that brought me comfort when the hate from our peers bit down through my metal exterior just a little too deep.
Y/n saw me for who I truly was, scars and all, and still thought I was worth something.
The most powerful, knee buckling feeling of affection rushed through me, and without thinking I opened my mouth.
“I lo-“ I coughed as her eyes swung up to me, her cheeks reddening as instantly as mine.
“Stay?” I amended, hoping she could hear the weight and meaning behind the single word.
She laughed, like she knew what I had started to say, but chickened out at the last second, not wanting to ruin the most perfect moment of my life.
“Always.” Her smile dropped as she stared back intently at me, walking over to place my head between her hands so I couldn’t turn away from her, she pressed her delectable lips against mine softly, pulling back slowly to wipe the unlawful tear away that brimmed at the corner of my eye.
“Always Edward.”
But as y/n had put it, I’d been stupid enough to believe her.
Those words, the entire night, every single moment shared between us had been ripped away from my rose-tinted glasses as my ring tumbled from her fingers onto the field, holding me rooted to the cold grass as she sloshed away from me and jumped into Jason Carvers truck. The painful sight had sent me spiralling after her once I figured out how to get my legs to work again, anger shot through me as I patted my jacket pockets for my keys as I sprinted across the field, finding them flat and empty.
By the time I tore through the empty school corridors back into the drama room and found my discarded keys sitting on the tabletop, the parking lot was dark and empty, no trail of y/n or any of the basketball team.
Even for my standard, I drove like a mad man to the nearest pay phone, smoothing out a crumpled piece of paper with y/n's loopy writing on it, Steve Harringtons number scribbled across the aged piece from her notebook.
“For emergency’s.” She’d smiled, slipping it into my glove box, at the time I had suspected her of just wanting Eddie the freak and Steve the hair Harrington to become friends, but whatever her reasoning, I was grateful for it now.
Even when I’d fallen from the roof of my uncles trailer at the tender age of ten playing air guitar, snapping my arm in the process, that didn’t even come close on the emergency scale compared to y/n disappearing with Carver.
The phone rang three times before someone picked it up.
“Harrington.” I breathed.
“Uh yeah…? Who’s this.”
“It’s Eddie.”
There was a loaded pause.
“Eddie Munson.” I gritted through my teeth, as I lightly banged my fist against the glass backing of the payphone box.
“Yeah. I got that, there’s only one Eddie Munson in Hawkins after all.”
I sighed heavily into the phone as unwanted thoughts of what Jason could be doing right that second consumed me.
“What’s up?” Steve’s voice was cautious as he waited for my answer.
“Y/n.” My voice dropped off as I stuttered over her name, cowering over the phone box as her words echoed in my mind.
“Y/n? Is she okay? What’s wrong? Where is she?” His voice raised an annoying octave with each question.
“She’s with Carver, she’s not safe, find her.” I slammed the receiver as I stumbled from the payphone, ripping my cigarettes from my pocket as I jogged towards my van. A long shadow crossed across my vision and the dimly lit carpark; I pulled my lighter away from my face as I squinted into the darkness.
Chrissy Cunningham had skipped out of the shadows next to the closed convenience store, she had her hands clutched together in front of her cheer skirt and her face gleamed from panicked sweat as she asked me in a hushed whisper despite that we were alone, the nearest soul probably a mile away, for something no ‘Good suburban girl” should even know about.
I wasn’t proud of it and given the situation I’d landed myself right after I’d invited her to my trailer, it had been the worst decision of my life.
But seeing her in her cheer uniform with her pom poms dangling by her side, an image of her holding hands with Jason in their matching Hawkins teams uniforms after the school pep rally this morning had flashed in my mind, and the urge to hurt Jason the same way he’d got to me, surged through me in a blinding, white, hot stab.
Feeding hardcore drugs to his innocent, preppy girlfriend had seemed like the perfect start, and after Chrissy admitted that she followed me from the school to find some reprieve from 'loosing her mind', she had smiled cautiously, but still trustingly as I pulled open my passenger side door for her and slipped inside.
Y/N | March 1986
“If only we could just, like, combine.” Robin intertwined her fingers as she leant against the poster across from me, I was seated on the three-legged stool behind the counter, my knees pressed to my chest as I rested my chin on them, holding a wet bag of ice to my head.
“Combine?” Steve raised his eyebrows at her questioningly, sliding the last of the returned tapes back into their place on the shelves as he joined Robin. I had been put on checkout duty, though I’d mostly spent our shift at Family Video quietly withering away in the corner. There hadn’t been too many customers this morning considering it was a Saturday, and Robin saved me from most of them anyway, leaving me to revel in my pounding hangover and the sickening memories from yesterday that plagued me.
Robin and Steve had both offered to cover for me at work, saying that it was okay if I needed to take some time for myself. They’d both shut their mouths when I’d glared at them, ripped Robins front door open and stormed past them towards Steve’s car, yelling out behind me that I would be in the back seat waiting to go to work.
After what I’d seen last night, when I had torn myself from Max’s couch, tearing across the living room as I tried to escape, drunkenly beating on Steve’s chest when he tried to hold me back. I had begged him to take me away, with hot tears streaming down my frozen cheeks as I collapsed on the gritty carpet. Steve held me as I fell to pieces, the weight of everything baring down on me relentlessly. A nearby lamp post flickered unnervingly as Steve had draped his jacket over my slumped shoulders as he helped me walk back to his car, while I pointedly avoided looking across from Max's trailer, afraid of what I'd see.
I couldn’t stand to face any of the consequences of what happened yesterday, the excruciating headaches and tormenting visions that came with them, my choice to drink the pain away with the basketball team and what Jason attempted or seeing Eddie with Chrissy at his trailer.
So when I woke up blearily in Robins bed this morning, with her and Steve watching me worriedly from the doorway, I had pretended that I couldn’t remember anything apart from ending things with Eddie on the field, quickly slipping between them towards the overtly pink bathroom as they tried to bombard me with inane questions, the steaming hot water that burned my skin hadn’t been enough to drown out their half-whispered fight behind the door as they argued over what they thought happened.
Eddie owed me no loyalty after what I’d done; but I had never felt more gutted than when I realised he had meant a whole lot more to me than I to him, how easy it had been for him to move on with another warm body, how easily interchangeable I was for him when he had been irreplaceable to me.
A whirlwind of emotions wrecked me. I felt devastated one moment and angry the next. My broken heart was coursing feelings of shame, doubt, confusion, and anxiety through me.
But no words were grand enough to describe what I was really feeling when thoughts of him trickled into my mind, sending great whips of agony to lap at my raw skin as I buckled over on the tiled shower floor.
I had ended things with Eddie and smashed both our hearts with my cruel words. They’d burned fiercer than the whiskey as they fell from my lips, each false word sending a new lash of pain across his face as we stood on the school field. I had almost gone back on my choice when he’d begged me to stay, the double subtext behind the word held it's on meaning between us. The true rawness of his pain crippled me, but the quick flash of the blazing headache that flickered behind my eyes had reminded me of what I’d seen in the school bathroom, and that my broken heart wasn’t anywhere near as important as Eddie, I needed him safe. It was better if he was heartbroken and alive, rather than the alternative he was guaranteed to succumb to if he continued to be a part of my cursed life.
That knowledge hadn’t kept my heart from ripping itself apart inside of me though.
I had to keep myself distracted, because if I stopped then I started to think about things; things like Chrissy walking up those steps, him inviting her into his trailer, opening the door for her like he’d done for me a hundred times. His hands tracing across her skin in the same patterns -
I was going to scream.
I slipped from my chair and started fiddling with a stack of receipts on the counter. I looked up as Robins heavy footsteps slapped against the floor as she ran past the register, her dark green work blazer flapping wildly as she spun around with a wide smile and snatched up a new tape.
“Doctor Zhivago.” My gaze flickered over to Steve’s as he rolled his eyes and stood up straight from where he leaned against the wall.
“Ugh, you know I don’t do double VHS.” Despite my black mood, I grinned as he waved his hands in dismay at her choice for our morning movie.
“But it’s about doomed love.” She held it up to her chest as her eyes puckered up in a puppy like state, I dropped mine to the tapes in my hands as my knees crumbled, her words sending an agonizing stab of invisible pain through me.
“Oh well that’s relatable.” Steve mumbled as he grabbed the tape trolley.
“Precisely.” Robin smiled, clasping it tighter to her chest.
I flattened myself against the counter as they both walked around it to join me, anger at their obliviousness surged through me as Robin continued to chatter aimlessly. I loved my only two, age-appropriate friends dearly, but their similar tactless ignorance was too much even for me at times.
“Also, Julie Christie is b-b-bonkers hot in this. Like seriously, the most beautiful creature I have ever seen in my life.” Steve rolled the trolly into the corner by our gumball machine as Robin snatched up the TV remote, I busied myself by drumming my fingers along the outdated computers keyboard as I waited for the monitor to roar to life.
“We’re in the Forest Hills trailer park in east Roane County.” A deadly shiver shot down my spine and something evil enough to scare the devil churned in my mind as the words from the reporter crackled from the speakers. A strange mixture of knowing panic and relief settled in my chest as I turned to look at fuzzy screen with the others, like I’d been waiting for something terrible to happen and it had finally arrived.
“We don’t have a lot of details now, but we can confirm that the body of a Hawkins High student was discovered early this morning. Police have not released the name..."
I didn’t need the name. I knew, I’d always known.
I had been too late, I’d been too selfish and given in to my basic human desires, it didn’t matter that it had been virtually impossible to stay away from Eddie, like there was something stronger than fate weaving our paths together, because now whatever brutal and fatal incident had happened at the trailer park, had pulled him into the cursed series of events that my friends and I were branded to never escape from.
All because I wasn’t strong enough to stop loving a boy I wasn’t supposed to so that I could keep him safe.
I gripped the side of the counter as blood rushed to my head, my body swayed dangerously as an ocean of blackness lapped at my consciousness, offering sanctuary as the glaring images from yesterday came to life before my eyes, the vision of Eddie’s lifeless body threatened to choke me as bile rose in my throat.
“Holy shit.” Steve moved closer into Robin as her eyes darted across the screen in shock, watching the older, dark-haired report deliver the news that was about to smash my world apart.
“Max…” She whispered, shame pulsed through me that her name had not been the first one I’d panicked and worried over, a double shot of frenzied terror shot through our group as I pictured sweet, passionate, fiery Max taking Eddie’s place in my mind, her luminous pale skin turning a sickly white in death.
The TV distorted in my vision as the blackness fought my last remaining feeble strings of hope, winning out as my knees collapsed onto the bristly carpet beneath us.
Eddie | March 1986
A trucks horn blared out as I dashed across the cracked road into the thick bush on the other side. My hair tangled with leaves and broken branches stung my eyes as my legs hammered into the uneven ground faster than they ever had before as I tore deeper and deeper into the woods. I hadn’t stopped running for hours, no straight thought in my mind except to run away from that.
I crouched down and curled over my knees against a flaky tree trunk to catch my breath as the heady silence of the trees pounded down on my eardrums, sweat dripping down my brow mixed with my tears and stung my eyes. I buried my head into my balled up fists until I was pressing hard enough on my eyes that I saw distorted shapes behind my darkened lids as I tried to shove away the images flashing though my mind like a horror movie.
It wasn’t enough.
The shapes soon turned into thin, pale snapped limbs; a sickening cracking echoed around the empty woods as hysterical sobs wracked my chest. I pulled at my hair frantically, trying to drown out the mental pain with physical. I flinched as a flock of birds soared over the canopy of green leaves above me, I turned to side as I fell forward on my hands, sharp rocks and stick scratching into my palms as I heaved, my loose hair fell around my face in curls as I breathed through my mouth. The rich smell of the damp earth invaded my mind as I bunched up my hands, watching the dirt squeeze through my fingers as I tried to ground myself, shivering as a light wet mist started to fall, unable to escape the past twenty-four hours that had been torturous and downright unbelievable.
I was in hell.
I had to be, there wasn’t any sane reason for what I had seen.
Unless I was crazy, maybe everyone that had ever call me freak was right, maybe I’d imagined it.
As the image of Chrissy’s shaking body slowly rising into the air, snapping into gruesome angles under an invisible force played over in my mind, I leant forward to press my face into the coolness of the ground beneath me. I’d been pretty great at creating fake scenarios for my clubs DnD campaigns, but the sounds of her bones cracking and the bloodied empty sockets where her eyes should have been, was beyond anything I was capable of conjuring up.
Comically – given my current situation and what happened with her yesterday –my thoughts flashed to y/n, my panic and worry for her was stronger than for myself right now, pathetically ironic since she had made it clear that I was nothing, that I meant nothing to her. I clenched my eyes shut and pressed my dirty palms to my forehead as tried to keep the images of her at bay, I’d rather face what happened in my trailer last night again then think about what she said, and how she’d looked at me on the field.
It would have been easier to.
I still couldn’t help but wonder if Steve had taken me seriously, he wasn’t my biggest fan but the previously douche jock did seem to be a genuine friend to y/n and I hoped he’d heard the panic in my voice and had enough sense after my phone call to track her down and make sure she was okay.
Even if what she had said to me, as her words tore me apart, was true, and there was no real feelings behind her actions the last couple of months towards me – my heart and eyes squeezed together as a wave of pain washed over me – that didn’t mean that there was anything but genuineness in my own behaviour, I had opened and bared my soul to y/n in a way no one else alive had ever seen.
I still cared about her.
I probably always would.
No matter what reasons lingered behind her cruel words to me, I wasn’t going to let her go off drinking with the guy that she had told me tried to attack her months earlier.
Or maybe I just didn’t know her as well as she knew me, I wondered what she would think when she saw the news this morning, would she instantly believe and know that I wasn’t the one who hurt Chrissy?
Would she even care?
And it was that thought that kept me running, because if I couldn’t even believe it why the hell would anyone else? As far as the narrow minded, straight path Hawkins residents were concerned, I was a satanic, devil worshipping, trailer trash, no good teenager and our High schools ‘It Girl’ was dead, crumpled gruesomely on my trailers living room floor.
Something clattered to my left, I sprung up and slammed into the tree as I shuffled back on my hands, my chest heaving as I stared at the rodent sniffing around for food in the grass a few paces from me. The terrified scream locked in my throat as its' confused, beady eyes met my scared ones, died as I realised it was just a wild animal and not a vigilante group hell bent on finding me.
I leapt up and took off again as distant horns hooted angrily in rapid succession from the main road, sending myself flying further into the disorientating clutches of the forest as my jacket flew out behind me in the whipping wind.
My feet that shuffled uncertainly first in one direction, sped up with purpose as the reflective surface of Lovers Lake glinted in the far-off distance.
Y/N | March 1986
Déjà vu hit me like a tonne of rocks as I sat against the back wall behind the counter on the grainy floor, the red-tinged luminous Family Video sign flickered above me. I sat with my legs pressing into the rough carpet beneath me as Robin rubbed my back and asked me if I was going to hurl, her voice sounded thick and far away as she turned to where Steve leaned against the counter still watching the news as her palm rubbed warm circles into my skin. As I breathed through my mouth to ease the nausea, I wondered if monstrous events were going to become an annual occurrence for me, but I guess it didn’t matter.
Because I didn’t think I’d survive this one.
Not if it involved Eddie.
Robin’s head snapped up, but I hung mine further into my hands as the store’s bell rung out loudly, the new arrivals slammed both doors open against the walls with a surrounding bang.
“Hey Steve!” I looked up at Dustin’s voice from the front of the store, dread coursing through me at the expressions on his and Max’s face. She had an open flannel over the navy sweater I’d seen her in last night and her wild red hair thrown up in a loose ponytail, Dustin was dressed similarly but just on the opposite colour spectrum, sporting his ironic blue and white ‘thinking cap’. I hurried to my feet as Max’s eyes landed on me, guilt plastering her face as she tried to avoid my stare.
“You guys seen this?” Steve shuffled uncomfortably as Robin moved to sit on the stool behind the counter as they both looked at Max in relief, neither of them voicing their solace in seeing that she wasn’t the unnamed dead student.
Self-reproach wracked me as the same comfort did not fill me, my eyes only on my brother and my thoughts on the man we both cared for too much about as Dustin spied me behind the counter.
“Y/n.” He gulped, his eyes flashing over my dark under eyes from crying all night; sleep had been well missed stranger to me for a while now.
“Do you know where Eddie is?” I dug my nails into my palms hard enough to draw blood, my worst fears coming to light. I couldn’t speak as I opened and closed my mouth several more times, no sound except a gutted gasp escaping from it as my eyes flew to Max’s.
I shook my head as I began to shake, waiting for the crushing blow I was sure he was about to deliver to me.
“Come on y/n, you have to have some idea of where he is.” My voice failed me as my lips mouthed around the word no, Dustin snapped his head away in annoyance and turned back to Steve.
“How many phones do you have?” He pleaded, laying his hands flat against the counter as he hunched over it, I looked between the two freshmen as an air of urgency and fear filled the air around us.
“Someone was murdered.” Steve ignored him, pointing at the tv that had the images of a crime scene flashing across it, I squeezed my eyes shut as I recognised the background.
“How many phones do you have.” He drawled out, his voice raising louder with each word as Max fiddled impatiently beside him. Steve’s head swung around to lock eyes with me over his strange request, confusion reflected in my gaze as well.
What did this have to do with Eddie?
“Uh two. Why?” His brow furrowed as he turned back to them, with slow movements I walked to stand behind Steve, watching erratic thoughts spin in Dustin’s eyes.
“Technically three if you count Keith’s in the back.” Robin piqued up, jamming her thumb over her shoulder as she pointed to our managers office behind us.
The others shared a confirming glance between them. “Yeah three works.” Max turned to Dustin, nodding ferociously as he slid his bulky backpack from his shoulders.
“What are you doing?” Steve asked apprehensively as I tensed, Dustin slammed the bag down on the counter.
“What are you-“ Steve yelled as he slid his bag across the tabletop and onto the ground below it.
“My pile!” Robin jumped up from her chair and slammed into me as my brother launched himself onto the counter.
“No no no! My tapes! Dude.” Steve grabbed his hair as Dustin’s feet swept the pile of movies into a loud clattering mess as he scrambled towards the computer.
“What are you doing man?” Steve whined, throwing his hands up angrily in the air. Max snuck around the corner of the square counter to join him as he plopped down in front of the computer, rapidly firing away as his fingers stroked the keys at lightning speed.
“Setting up base of operations here.” Robin peeked up at the screen as he typed madly away, absentmindedly handing me one of the scattered tapes as we both bent down to pick them up.
“Base of operations?” Robin repeated, shooting Dustin a quizzical look.
“Stop. Get off of that.” Steve tried to usher Dustin from the seat as Max stared over his shoulder intently at the names scrawling across the screen.
“No I need it.” He shot back, flexing his fingers in irritation.
“Need it for what?” Steve grumbled, sounding awfully like a tired parent.
“Looking up Eddie’s friends phone numbers.” He explained, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. My neck snapped up from the pile of tapes I had stacked in my hands, slamming them down on the counter at Eddie’s name.
“Oh Eddie your new best friend because he’s so much cooler than me.” Steve replied immaturely.
“Ehhh yes.” Dustin swung his head around on his shoulders in frustration at Steve’s childish antics. “I never said that.” He exclaimed.
“Dustin.” I whispered, but my voice got lost as the store phone rung in a loud shrill.
“Seriously you guys maybe on a Monday you can play around in here like toddlers, but it’s Saturday. It’s our busiest day.” Robin slammed her own pile down next to mine as she bent up to pick up a sign that Dustin had kicked off the counter.
“Dustin.” I tried again, turmoil boiling within me as my mind ran rampant, Eddie’s face contorted in different types of pain burned behind my eyelids.
“Look Robin, I totally empathise but this cannot wait until Monday.” He spun back in the chair as he ripped a notebook from his pocket, frantically scribbling down something as he stared as the computer screen.
“Oh my God.” Steve mumbled, rubbing his face as he bent down to pick up more stuff scattered on the floor.
“What, because calling all of Eddie’s friends is an emergency?” Robin shot back.
“Correct.” Dustin yelled. Max turned to look at me as she felt me move behind her.
“You want me to strangle him? Or do you wanna do it?” Steve offered to Robin as he helped her return things to their rightful place.
“We could take turns.” She smirked.
“Dustin!” I yelled, slamming my hand down next to Max and making her jump.
I knew something was seriously wrong when my brother refused to meet my eyes, his brows puckered as he dropped the notebook in front of him and pointed his pencil over his shoulders at us.
“Can you just fill them in while I do this?” He aimed his words at Max, so I turned to her expectantly, so did Robin and Steve. A rage filed scream filed my throat as her stare met mine, pity and sorrow reflected in her blue eyes as her lips quivered, hesitating on the edge of words that were about cut through me like a rusty, serrated knife.
“Fill us in on what?” Robin questioned, her gaze flicking between our faces as dread filled mine and guilt clouded Max’s.
Eddie | March 1986
I sped past the front door of the house nestled by the glistening blue water, the darkened windows and dusty front porch giving off an air of neglect and headed straight for the boat house hidden down the back of Reefer Ricks property, I swung my head to the sides as I sprinted down the uneven slope.
Even out here, miles away from the nearest suburban household, I felt like there were eyes on me. I slammed my hands against the white sheet metal of the unlocked door, barrelling through it and spinning back to slam it shut.
My breathing was heavy as I rushed to the grimy window, gripping the sides as my bulky rings strained against my skin painfully, I peeked through the smears of dirt and dust into the empty surrounding woods, the blaring sunlight filtered down through new spring trees, shining far too much exposure onto my scarcely hidden position for my liking. I slumped over the windowsill as my breathing slowed, clutching at the stich in my side. The small boat suspended in air over the hole in the middle of the floor that dropped off into the lake, held by four chains attached to each corner, creaked eerily as a cool breeze flowed in from the still water outside, the reflection of its' depths danced across the walls in a dizzying pattern.
A pungent off smell surround the boat house from the life jackets and fishing gear hung up around the walls, I swept my hands across the rough wooden benches that lined the far wall across from me as my stomach rumbled, pushing piles of crap and junk onto the floor carelessly as I searched for some kind of weapon.
Something.
Anything.
I scoffed to myself as I pulled a warm pack of beer from beside the turned off old fridge in the corner, out of date snack bars layered in dust, packed behind it.
Yeah, it’ll have to do.
The glass bottle slipped through my fingers and split into a thousand shards as something screed behind me, I flung around and fell back against the grainy wood bench, swinging my head wildly towards to source until I spotted the Bald Eagle soaring over the reflective blue water as it dived, it’s wings spread wide as it dipped and flew in spectacular patterns. I walked over slowly to the edge of the open window, my thoughts moving to my Uncle Wayne.
They were his favourite birds; he’d always come home with a new random fact about them, his face bright with excitement as he shoved his favourite nature book under my nose as we sat at our dingy dinner table eating a five-star microwaved meal.
“You know kid, they mostly eat fish?”
“Really?”
“Yeah, follow a Bald Eagle and you’ll never go hungry.”
I coughed as a desperate sob racked my body, bending over to grab my knees as my heart clenched for my Uncle, wishing he was here with me now, torn between not wanting to be alone in this mess but praying to a God I definitely didn’t believe in or at least, - didn’t have a good relationship with – that divine fate had intervened, and my uncle didn’t return home this morning from his shift to find what drove me out last night. My hands trembled as panic consumed me, imagining what he must have thought when he found the bloody, crumpled mess that used to be Chrissy.
Would he think it was me? No, he knew me better than almost everyone. He must have called the cops by now; he had to be worried about me. Once my name was dragged into this there would be hell to pay, a fury of uniform clad search parties out for my head.
I wondered if there’d be anyone on the opposite side of that, out looking to help me. My uncle definitely, My Hellfire club maybe. Though I couldn’t imagine anyone or anything able to stop whatever did that to Chrissy.
My thoughts flashed to Henderson as I watched the Eagle soar low over water’s edge, disappearing into the orange horizon as the sun quickly set. Jealously floored me as I wished for my own pair of strong wings to fly me away from this mess.
Like a rabid animal, I shot up and dived under the damp blue tarp covering the rusty boat, rapidly spreading it over me to cover my sneakers as the far-off sound of tires spinning over gravel made its way towards the boathouse.
Y/N | March 1986
“Have you seen or heard from Eddie recently?” Dustin paced back and forth in front of me as he pressed the phone harder into his ear. The world around me passed in a blur as my thoughts consumed me.
Chrissy Cunningham dead in Eddie’s trailer.
Eddie missing or worse.
I had nearly torn poor Max’s arms off as I gripped her shoulders, leveling my face with hers as I made her repeat what she said, she had to tell me three times that she had seen him leave – alive – before I collapsed back against the stool behind the counter in relief.
Steve, Robin and I had all stood wordless as a cold tremor ran though the three of us as Max spoke about the electrical problems at the trailer park and what her and Dustin thought that meant.
I didn’t think that I would ever feel relieved to hear that the upside down and the monsters within it were wracking havoc on Hawkins in again, but relief flowed through me that they thought and agreed that it had to be something supernatural because there was no way Eddie had hurt Chrissy.
Alive but on the run. Thing could be a lot worse. I bit at my raw nails beds, my ringers tracing the ghost of Eddie’s ring that no longer sat on my finger as I impatiently sat and listened to the three phone calls happening around me, I had been dismissed from my list of names to ring, Robin gently tugging the phone from my hand with a small, pitiful smile as I shook like a leaf in the wind.
“Eddie Munson.” Max sped past me in the other direction to Dustin.
“When was the last time you talked to him?” Dustin sighed and crossed another long shot name off the short list.
“Yeah have you seen him?” Max quipped.
“Okay, sorry to bother you” Dustin slammed his receiver down and reached for another number.
“Know anyone who’d know where he is?” Max groaned, her eyes snapping up to meet mine as I fiddled and leaned in closer to hear the irritated voice on the other line.
“I reallyyy don’t think he’s at the arcade.” Robin grabbed the phone dial and held it to her chest, walking over to the other side of the counter. “Yep, I’m pretty sure.” I sighed and pressed my lips together as she looked up at me in disappointment.
“Reefer Rick? No. Does this Reefer Rick have a last name? I mean, it’s kind of…” Max jogged over to the blank notebook in front of the register, waving her hand around as she tried to drag the information out from the person on the other end of the call.
“Doctor Zhivago.” Steve strutted past me on the other side of the counter as he weaved his way through the isles of stacked movie, the double VHS tape held up in his hand as he smirked as the customer – she was what both he and Robin would have described as a ‘babe’. I huffed and slipped from the chair, ignoring his antics as I watched Max scribble something down madly, peeking over her shoulder to make out her messy handwriting.
She slammed the phone down and turned to the me watching her with a hopeful expression. “Hey guys, I might have a lead.”
“Seriously?” Dustin spun around with a keen grin as Robin hung up mid conversation.
“Yeah. Apparently Eddie gets his drugs from some guy named Reefer Rick. And sometimes Eddie crashes there.” Max’s face scrunched up over the name as she shook her head.
Uh oh.
Ricks place out by Lovers Lake, sat in the middle of nowhere surround by thick tufts of trees.
Perfect place to hide.
Panic and frustration shot through me that I hadn’t thought of Eddie’s supplier myself, while I listened to the group try and figure out where to find him.
“That sounds promising. Where does this Reefer Rick guy live?” Robin
“See that’s the thing, no one knows. He’s more of a legend than someone that people actually know.” Max shrugged her shoulders as she acknowledged how ridiculous it sounded. Guilt pulsed through me as I considered letting them figure it out the hard way, saving me the grace of not admitting my habit to Dustin, not that I’d been keeping life together well recently, but I still wanted to be a good older sibling example to him.
No, Eddie’s safety was more important than my bruised ego taking a hit to my questionable-to-begin-with reputation, and with the man hunt that was already brewing from the news that there was a high school student murdered, every second was crucial.
“What about a last name?” Dustin suggested.
“I don’t know that either.” Our heads flung to the front of the store as Steve cut Max off.
“Bet the cops know the last name.” He was loading more tapes into the trolley, mumbling away from us as he pointedly tried to ignore my outraged face, his vest swayed like a red flag as his back made for a nice, large target for the tape I’d subconsciously picked up.
“The cops? Really Steve that’s your suggestion?” Dustin spat, a similar expression of disgust and anger reflected on his face.
I needed to speak up now.
“We don’t need the cops. I know where Reefer Rick lives.” The older friends of the group shot me knowing and disappointed looks as Dustin scrunched up his face at me. Steve slammed the last of the tapes down and spun around towards the counter.
“How the hell do you-“ I cut Dustin off before he started on his tangent.
“That doesn’t matter right now.” I waved him off, turning my attention to Steve as I slid closer next to him to join him at the counter, placing my own arms on the tabletop, forcing him to look at me. My body was like an electrified live wire, burning at the touch as each wasted second that ticked away put my teeth on edge.
“We need to find Eddie before the cops do, and every moment counts right now.” I forced myself to hold back the anger in my voice, we couldn’t afford to fight between ourselves right now, Steve didn’t know Eddie like I did – not that he’d given him much of a chance – but if what happened at his trailer had anything to do with the upside down, then we needed to stick together, I needed his help, my friends help, to save Eddie.
And myself, if I was honest.
Because if Eddie didn’t escape from the evil supernatural forces of the upside down or the inevitable witch hunt by Hawkins residents, then I had no intention to either.
The only way we were going to be able to fight this was together, like we always had.
“I just think that they should be filled in on what we know, what’s going in.” He shrugged, turning to face me as my expression pleaded with him, his own conveying his urgency for me to understand his point.
“You think Eddie’s guilty, don’t you?” Dustin snapped, my younger brother grew fiercer than even myself for a moment as Steve tore his stare away from mine and leaned on the counter towards him, an apologetic look on his sharp features as he shrugged again. Dustin crossed his arms and raised his brows at him as I placed my hand over his, clenching down harshly on his fingers.
“Steve, you and I have been through things that we can’t even bare to speak about. Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t trust me. I know Eddie, better than anyone else ever will. He didn’t do this. We need to go find him and save him from whatever did.” Dustin swiped his bag back onto his shoulders as he shoved Max and Robin towards the exit, mumbling for them to move faster.
I turned away to catch the door as it swung back closed after them, pausing as I noticed Steve still hadn’t moved, his eyes glued to his hands as he clenched them together.
My thin patience snapped as I watched a police patrol car speed past with its siren blaring as its lights reflected off the store front’s windows.
“You’re coming, or so help me I will put hair removal in your shampoo until you go bald.”
Chapter Eleven
➢ Eddie Tag List } @dotslabyrinth @chanaaaannel @lem0nb0iii @xcarabear @projectcampbell @munchabunch @grungegrrrl @sammararaven @ches-86 @alinepichi @halbhohehalluzination @kalalikalas @thetrashqueen23 @bruh-tato-chap @sagittariughs @c0rroded-coffin @averagemisfit03 @eddiesgffff @churchmuffins
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#eddie smut#eddie munson fan fiction#eddie munson#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson headcanon#eddie stranger things#stranger things 4#stranger things s4#eddie fanfic#eddie x you#opposite ends#eddie fluff#eddie x reader#stranger things#eddie munson one shot#eddie munson slow burn#eddie munson fic#eddie munson fanfic#Eddie Munson angst
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Ive been bored out of my mind 😩 any movie or book recomendations?
You opened up the can. Do you want the worms? XD
YES!! I DO HAVE RECCOMENDATIONS!! XD And I'm so glad you asked ^^ Obviously you're not required to take any of these, but if you do- let me know what you think! ^^
If you're here, I assume you like fun, sinister and exciting villains. So I'll give you a little info on the villains in each source 😅😆
Movies:
First of all- a n y m o v i e (or episode in a TV show) with Robert Englund playing the bad guy. You can't go wrong. Even if the rest of the source is... not-so-great... the man never misses.
(In particular: The Last Showing, Inkubus, and Good Day For It are really good! Especially the first 2.
The Last Showing (free on Plex): Villain is a weaselly, geeky loser with a with dreams of sinister grandeur.
Inkubus (free on Tubi): Villain is a sexy, sinister, cunning, smug old demon.
Good Day For It (free on YouTube): just... just have a peak at what I've been posting non-stop the whole weekend 😅🫠🫠🫠)
The Rescuers and the Rescuers Down Under. If you haven't seen these and you like Disney Villains, you must!! You get both!; a nasty woman with scary eyes and no code of ethics, and a big, sinister, crooked-grin bush man.
The Lake Placid Series. I KNOW, I KNOW- you probably read that and think 'ughh why' but LOOK- TRUST ME- The Bickerman's are a riot. A hoot, even XD From a sweet old lady who swears and feeds whole cows to the crocodiles played by Betty White to her son who's a greedy old poacher who is equal parts creepy and loony tune- they're so much fun XD The only movie in which they aren't antagonists is 3, but then you get Reba who is a grumpy, bad ass milf and is that really a miss? No, I don't think so.
Going back to kids animation- Happily N'Ever After (free on Vimeo) You got a myriad of villainous suitors to choose from in this one XD You got the Big Bad Wolves (💕❤️💕❤️💕❤️), witches, Rumplestilstkin, and Cinderella's Evil Stepmother who is- just- so hot XD A wicked lady with a slit in her dress.
... are you into creepy nasty old men? Because I think Judge Turpin played by Alan Rickman in Sweeney Todd; The Demon Barber of Fleet Street takes the cake in that department.
Little Shop of Horrors. Yes- Audrey II is plant, but he's smooth motherfucker, and some of us are into that 😆😅 And maybe so are you. And if you aren't into Audrey II, there's always Orin; a leather jacket wearing, motorbike riding, sadistic jackass.
Oh!! The Funhouse Massacre!!! Another fun one with a myriad of scary boyfriends XD (and one scary girlfriend XD). It's a cheesy gore fest but of you like that or can get past it- your villains here include a Wrestler Murder-Clown, a Psychotic, Silent Harlequinn, a Sinister and Charismatic Cult Leader, a Sexy Sadistic Dentist, a Cute Cannibalitic Chef, and a Creepy Old Taxidermist.
Disney's Once Upon A Halloween (free in parts on YouTube). It's all your favourite Disney Villains (before Dr Facilier I think) in one place- what else could you want? XD
Books:
If you like hot demons and you have a teacher kink-- then The Evil Librarian Trilogy (Michelle Knudsen) are definitely for you XD You got the evil librarian (Mr Gabriel), who is basically evil incarnate with a sexy goatee. Then you also Principal Kingston who is an older dilf wearing cargo pants and is slightly silly (my favourite, and also the reason i named my kangaroo oc kingston)-- and then Ms Kralovna; the language teacher and an absolute Queen.
Dorothy Must Die (Danielle Paige) pretty much makes Dorothy (years later) a wicked slutty dictator, the scarecrow a creepy mad scientist, the tinman a besotted obsessed guardsman, and the cowardly lion a monster. Plus there's the Nome King in the last 2 books who is describes as the 'most sinister senior citizen' which is the perfect descriptor for him XD
If you like Slasher movies, you will d e f I n e t l y love The Final Girls Support Group (Grady Hendrix). It's just so cool and interesting how Hendrix puts the actual Slashers into the book without saying their names.
Hellhole (Gina Damico). Okay this is another demon XD Except this one works in... the greasy food office in hell XD (I think XD ) Don't get me wrong, he's bad; he's powerful, and he'll kill your whole family, and he has unreasonable demands if you refuse. But he's mostly happy to sit in your basement with no pants eating tostitos and whole sticks of butter while watching project runway and playing cod for now XD And his name is Burg (as in Burgundy Cluttermuck)- isn't that cute? XD
Karen M. McManus books. Any of them. (Though, I do recommend The Cousins and Two Can Keep a Secret in particular. I cant tell you much cuz they're mysteries but they are definitely my kinda bastards. If you like the characters I write for you'll probably like them too XD The only misfortune is that, since they are mysteries, they aren't acting all villainous until the end. )
Alice and Red Queen (Christina Henry). If you have a strong stomach and you like gory, sometimes unpleasant horror- these are for you! The characters of Alice in Wonderland are n e v e r going to be the same 😅😅😅 Especially the Rabbit, who is... I think, a trafficker? Meanwhile the Walrus, um- nope, i'm not going there. Moving on!
DANCING JAX DANCING JAX DANCING JAX. These are my f a v o u r i t e books. Ever. They will always be my favourite books. And let me tell you why!!- They are o v e r f l o w i n g with vastly different, interesting, flawed characters who totally stick with you forever XD And a good lot of them are bad guys. You got:
- Austerly Fellows; a creepy charismatic cult leader type who may not actually be Austerly Fellows?? Their could be a swapped at birth/changeling sorta thing going on here?? (The 'original' Austerly had a mark on his foot and the one that his mother got back from the baby farm didn't).
- The Jockey; the kind of bad guy who ain't loyal to anyone. Not even the other bad guys. He must play everyone one way or another (its the way he was written, and he follows through), at some point. He's tricky, and weaselly, and gross. I love him.
- Jangler; Austerly's right hand man. He's a stern, crotchety and nasty old codger. His heart is as cold as ice, he's calculated, and he definitely takes joy in some of the terrible things its his job to do.
- etc. There's more but I cant give more away 😅
Thats what i can think of right now! ^^ I'd be so so jazzed if you took any of these recc's but don't worry about feeling obligated too! ^^ It was fun to talk about them XD
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The Umbrella Academy Season 3 ☂️
i last week finished watching the third season woo !! i used to be so obsessed with tua after watching season 1 that i even ended up getting all the volumes of the comics 😅 after watching season 3 i also reread all the comics back to back in like one sitting lol
(spoilers for both the show and the comics coming up 🫣)
im gonna try my best to not make this sound super confusing when i talk about both season 3 of the show and volume 3 of the comics lol
------------------------------- the comic ---------------------------------so i went into season 3 having not previously read the 3rd volume of the comics meaning i had no idea what would happen, though i did know that the idea of hotel obsidian/oblivion was based off the comics BUT!! i found that the 3rd season of the show practically had nothing to do with the comics other than the title 😭
the plots of the show and comics across all seasons and volumes are both very different and season 3 was the most unlike its corresponding comic. one of the main differences being that the sparrow academy are only introduced at the end of volume 3 of the comics so i honestly dont know where the whole storyline for the 3rd season of the show came from
i personally found the plot of the 3rd volume of the comic quite confusing and hard to follow as the perspectives and locations kept changing a lot so im actually rather glad that they chose not to portray the events of this comic in the show. that being said, i did like how each of umbrella siblings had their own storylines/adventures that they were on. probably my favourite storyline in the comics is vanya's ongoing recovery from volume one of the comics and also the pairing of five and allison which happens throughout the comics. i also like that luther and diego's rivalry is present across the comics.
------------------------------- the show ---------------------------------
in the show, i find the characters to be much more likeable and more full of personality compared to the comics so season 3 did not disappoint in that respect. it was cool to see aspects of the comics continue to be translated into the show for example allison's reluctance to use her powers is a big thing in both medias AND IM SO GLAD THAT KLAUS FINALLY GOT TO USE THE FULL POTENTIAL OF HIS POWERS IN THE SHOW 😭😭😭 all the other character progression among the umbrella siblings is great as well!!! (we love senior citizen five)
i liked the sparrows though some of them did not get much screen time and a few of their powers were a bit lame in my opinion 💀 (marcus and alphonso i am looking at you, sorry not sorry) i love love LOVE fei tho she is sooooo coool and christopher being just a random floating cube is so silly to me plus if you think about it, um some woman gave birth to that?!?!?!?!
seeing sparrow ben just get subtly accepted by the umbrella siblings was so sweet like they were lowkey all just so happy to see ben again even if he's different. OH AND SPEAKING OF ACCEPTING!!!!! VIKTOR HARGREEVES 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
madddd props to the producers/writers of the show for giving elliot page a trans character and doing it in such a good way ❤️❤️❤️❤️
im so obsessed with all the different sibling reactions to viktor (also vanya in the comics has short hair sooooooo)
ok so a few things i didnt like so much was first of all, luther and sloane romance felt really forced to me and a bittttt weird but ive seen people say that luther was in his himbo era during season 3 so honestly i'll let it slide. secondly there's lila who i disliked in season 2 but then she shows up with stan and i loved stan he was so silly!!!! BUT THEN lila is suddenly actually pregnant😭???? idk man, it gotta hella crazy. um thirdly (this is gonna be a really hot take but hear me out), i know its the whole point of the show and its a reoccurring thing that happens but all this end of the world/apocalypse business is kindaaa boring now 🧍 i guess it does happen differently in each season so its not completely repetitive everytime and i must say that this time was actually my favourite end of the world lol
hopefully, the finally season will resolve everything nicely but only time will tell i suppose 👁️👁️. im actually gonna shut up now though because this is getting so long and while i could go on and on about tua im gonna have to stop 😭
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mutual 1: IM GOING TO **** *** ** *** *** (picture of a senior citizen)
mutual 2: long in depth post about discourse i had no idea was even a thing people argued about
mutual 3: look at my rats boy
mutual 4: im on post number 500 of my favourite blorbo in the past 2 months. this is what would happen if they were a worm.
mutual 5: i dont think tiktok is that bad tbh
mutual 6: lmao tiktok is a virus
mutual 7: im playing this text only rpg game from 1997. this is how i imagine my character. she has a flamethrower for a leg :)
mutual 8: poll: should i get the regular or the double (but a secret third option is winning)
mutual 9: sorry, mommy? sorry, mommy? sorry
mutual 10: in dnd today we killed smokey bear
mutual 11: here is my well thought out and in depth analysis of a piece of media that has a fandom of like 10 people
mutual 12: please unblock me i promise i won't give you rabies im better now i prommy i prommy (BITES YOU)
mutual 13: uncaptioned oblivion video of a man ascending into the sky and saying 'farewell'
mutual 14: hi im not dead haha! i just was suddenly homeless and then also lived in a cave for five months and ate moss and drank rainwater and sang to the cave water salamanders and it was soul changing. anyway i have a job at a weed shop now.
mutual 15: i am going to drink her bathwater
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youtube
Movies I watched (and books I read) this Week # 143 (Year 3/Week 39):
Jules, E.T. for senior citizens. A simple (and simplistic) story about 79-year-old Ben Kingsley (with a head full of hair) and early onset dementia who discovers an alien ship in his back yard. More of a character study that sci-fi. It's nice to see a light movie about old people. 4/10.
🍿
2 documentaries from a 'different' New Yorker list, Richard Brody's '62 Films That Shaped the Art of Documentary Filmmaking':
🍿 The Lenny Bruce Performance Film (1967), more of an interesting historic document, than a funny-ha-ha stand up of the iconic rabble-rouser. His next-to-last live performance, at a small San Francisco cabaret hall, consists mostly of readings from the legal transcripts of his prosecutions. Paranoiac ramblings, strung on drugs, intense. Born 30 years too early.
🍿 A Plate of Sardines, (1997) a short Syrian poem about Quneitra, a city at the Golan Heights that was razed to the ground by the Israeli army in 1974. Disturbing (but not a very good).
🍿
The last film I saw in Israel, Tel Aviv on fire, only my 3rd Palestinian movie. It's an implausible story about a soap opera of a Palestinian spy who falls in lave with an Israeli general. Filmed in Ramallah, it is popular with Arabs and Jews alike. A low-level production assistant on the set becomes a writer, and is forced to use input for the plot from a soldier who mans the checkpoint he must drive through every day. An intriguing premise which predictably ends as a light soap opera itself.
I had a hard time with the more realistic parts of the movie, showing the oppressive humiliations that the Arabs have to go through every day, as they live "side by side" with the occupying soldiers. It's the first film I've seen that takes part on the eastern side of the border wall.
🍿
(Completely unplanned) 2 With minor character actor Guy Boyd:
🍿I've seen all but one of Charlie Kaufman's eight features, but I can't say I'm a big fan. His 'mysterious', unexplainable I'm Thinking Of Ending Things didn't win me over. Creepy Jesse Plemons brings his new girlfriend to meet his bizarre parents at their secluded farmhouse, and "nothing is what it seems" there. I liked the enigmatic ballet and "revelations" at the end, but the 'snowstorm from hell' and intellectual, unsympathetic characters turned me off. 3/10.
(From a list of '96 Best Thrillers')
🍿Body double, one of the old Brian De Palma Hitchcock homages, felt like one of the worst movies I ever saw. I know it wasn't, but it felt like it. 80's gratuitous "voyeurism", trashy prurient porn-parody, with a young Bill Maher-clone who can't act as the protagonist. Just horrible. 1/10.
🍿
2 X London gangsters action from the early 2000:
🍿Snatch, my first crime comedy by Guy Ritchie. All macho and bravado, bad accents and testosterone-fueled attitudes, wise cracks and brutal mayhem.
"In the quiet words of the Virgin Mary… come again?" 8/10.
🍿"Listen, I know it’s not your thing, but if you ever have to kill someone, never ever tell a living soul."
Layer cake, another highly-quotable story from the same source, with the same people and the same sensibilities. The film that helped Daniel Craig land the role of James Bond. Terrific entertainment all around with a shocking last scene. 8/10.
RIP, Michael Gambon!
🍿
7 more shorts:
🍿 Shall we kiss? (On s’embresse?), one of my favourite French shorts. (Video Above).
🍿 How to count a wolf, a short conservation documentary, about the process of tracking wolves across many seasons in Washington state.
🍿 Encarnación, a New Yorker documentary: A Ninety-Five-Year-Old Shares Her Secret to Happiness.
🍿Also, 4 more of Wes Anderson shorts:
Now that Netflix spent £500 million for Roald Dahl's works, we'll see many more of them. The swan, The rat catcher and Poison are 3 adaptations from his short stories. I've seen nearly all of Wes Anderson's films, features, shorts and commercial, and he is indeed a real 'auteur', but (Like Kaufman above), his work, except of small brilliant moments here and there, leave me cold.
Castello Cavalcanti is actually my favourite of today’s bunch. Another stylish Prada advertisement, a Fellini product placement, rustic Italy for nostalgic tourists.
🍿
Alice Kuypers’ Life on the Refrigerator Door, a British book about a 15-year-old and her single mother who discovers she has cancer. It features a unique 'hook'; The story unfolds 100% via a series of notes the two leave for each other in the kitchen. It’s a very light, 240 page / 40 minute read - 7/10.
🍿
(My complete movie list is here)
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Top 10 Best Tents for Seniors
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Top 10 Best Tents for Seniors
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The outdoors provides numerous opportunities for senior citizens to stay active, feel closer to nature, and spend quality time with family and friends. However, unpredictable weather and various elements threaten their health and safety. Choosing the right camping gear can address such issues and allow them to immerse in the experience and create lasting memories.
In this article, we will share our list of the best tent for seniors that will likely match the campers’ different needs and expectations. You are also going to find below a detailed guide to serve as a reference in assessing the tents. Pay careful attention to the essential qualities and features so that you can better decide which will be a worthy investment for fun, relaxing and safe camping trips with your loved ones.
What is the best camping tent for seniors
Our overall all time favourite camping tent for seniors is: Marmot Crane Creek
Nowadays, several manufacturers offer excellent tents that can be used intuitively by people from all walks of life. So, whether you are a nature lover with years of camping experience or a novice traveller who wishes to discover the natural wonders, we believe the following models can be the ideal outdoor accommodation for senior citizens.
We have carefully selected these products and highlighted the critical points every buyer should know. Our team hopes that by learning the advantages and limitations of each recommendation, you can identify the right tent to add to your list of essential camping gear for seniors.
The best wild camping tents at a glance
The best camping tents for seniors in 2023 – An honest review:
1) Marmot Crane Creek 2-Person Tent – Best tent for wild camping overall
“Brought this on several different environments and it has held up well.”
About the Marmot Crane Creek 2-Person Tent
This remarkable 3 season tent promises more space for campers to move around, relax, and sleep. Nonetheless, it can easily be carried around even by those who are not as strong as they used to be.
We also appreciate how the brand found a way to deliver a sturdy build and weatherproof features without demanding an exorbitant price. That’s why our team considers it a real standout amongst its peers.
Why this tent stands out:
The colour-coded tent poles quicken the assembly of this tent.
The nylon flysheet provides full coverage for 100% water leak protection.
Its groundsheet has raised ridges and double-taped seams to eliminate the risk of ground moisture seepage.
The tent has two doors with dedicated awnings to store your camping gear.
The multi-vent system maximises your comfort inside the tent while keeping you and your belongings dry.
Pros and Cons
PROS
The tent’s durable poles and fabric provides excellent protection against rain and gusts of wind.
The wide-bottom design leaves ample space for lounging and sleeping.
It offers more headroom than similar models because of the overhead clip for the inner tent.
This tent is relatively light and compact, unlike many 3-season tents in the market.
The black flysheet makes it an ideal choice for wild camping trips.
CONS
You cannot use the flysheet on its own because its structure depends on the inner tent.
Some users claimed they had to add tent pegs and guy lines to stabilise the tent during a stormy day.
Tent Specifications:
1500 mm HH: 218.44 x 127 x 109.22 cm Capacity: 2 People Weight: 2.4 kg Waterproofing: 1500 mm HH Seasons: 3 seasons Included: Aluminium poles, tent pegs, guy lines, flysheet, and carry bag
Concluding thoughts:
The Marmot Crane Creek 2-Person Tent ranks among the best camping tents for seniors because of its roomy layout, various waterproofing measures, and easy setup requirements. You will not feel cramped, anxious, or uncomfortable while waiting for the weather to improve or when trying to rest for the day.
2) Cflity Automatic Pop-Up Family Tent – Best pop-up tent for seniors
“After a long day travelling I was very pleased to find that it really did only take a few minutes to erect.”
About the Cflity Automatic Pop-Up Family Tent
This lightweight pop-up unit is the best tent for seniors who want to enjoy the great outdoors without all the hassle. A single elderly who may not have the same strength or stamina as they used to can set it up or take it down in 1 minute without requiring someone else’s assistance.
Cflity designed this tent with durable and weatherproof materials, so rest assured that you will not be harmed no matter what the weather brings. The spacious interior and inner pockets also leave plenty of room to unwind after a long day of hiking or fishing.
Why this tent stands out:
The tent employs an automatic hydraulic system with built-in poles for a speedy assembly time.
Two D-shape doors on opposite sides consist of an inner and outer flap, improving the tent’s ventilation and privacy.
On a sunny day, you can detach the outer tent from the inner tent to create a shade or gazebo.
Cflity includes a free set of stainless steel stakes and four guy lines if you need to anchor the tent to the ground for greater stability.
The waterproofing tape has been applied to all corners, bottom seams, zipper lines, and interior hooks for added protection from water leakage.
Pros and Cons
PROS
The instant pop-up design minimises the time and effort needed to pitch the tent.
You can extend both doors to create small porches to prevent water from entering the tent or store dirty camping gear.
It’s a good investment because the tent can be used in multiple ways and environments.
All materials used are reliable even when exposed to harsh elements.
Seniors won’t have to worry about getting wet inside the tent because of its comprehensive waterproofing features.
CONS
Some users needed a few attempts to return the tent to its carry bag.
The limited height of the tent may not be suitable for tall individuals.
Tent Specifications:
Product Dimensions: 230 x 287 x 132 cm Capacity: 3 People Weight: 4.08 kg Waterproofing: 3000 mm HH Seasons: 4 seasons Included: Fibreglass poles, stainless steel stakes, windproof rope, flysheet, and carry bag
Concluding thoughts:
The Cflity Automatic Pop-Up Family Tent is an excellent option for senior citizens looking for a durable tent that they can use with minimal effort. It can comfortably fit two people who packed a lot for the camping trip, but the extendible design promises enough room for another occupant without diminishing the tent’s cosiness entirely.
3) Coleman Cobra 3 Tent – Best budget backpacking tent for seniors
“For the price, I don’t think you can beat this.”
About the Coleman Cobra 3 Tent
If you’re looking for the best tents for senior citizens with a limited budget for camping, this model offers excellent value for money. With its appealing wedged tunnel form, the tent can shelter up to three occupants from the rain and wind.
Elderly campers can also handle the simple 2-pole arch system, which only shortens the pitching time to about 10 minutes. It can also fit into most backpacks and weighs less than 3 kilograms, thus making it quite portable.
Why this tent stands out:
The aluminium poles feel light yet sturdy and flexible enough to withstand strong winds.
It protects you from harmful UV rays through the tent’s SPF 50+ fabric.
The tent materials prevent fire from spreading quickly because of the flame-retardant layer.
The sewn-in PE groundsheet is taped on all sides.
It offers various storage options through its two porches, side pouches, and a lamp hanger.
Pros and Cons
PROS
Setting up this tent is straightforward because it only requires sliding two poles into the sleeves.
It is relatively lighter compared to many 3-person tents in the market.
You won’t struggle to get in or out of the tent because it has entrances on both sides.
Its tunnel form makes it more stable than most tents.
You will be well protected, rain or shine while staying inside this tent.
CONS
The inner tent and flysheet are attached to one another, unlike other models where the inner and outer tent can be used separately.
The tent cannot stand independently without being secured to the ground using the provided tent pegs.
Tent Specifications:
Product Dimensions: 313 x 310 x 105 cm Capacity: 3 People Weight: 2.9 kg Waterproofing: 3000 mm HH Seasons: 3 seasons Included: Aluminium poles, tent pegs, and carry bag
Concluding thoughts:
Though the Coleman Cobra 3 Tent belongs to the budget category, it does not skimp on the features that seniors look for the most in their camping tents. It is weatherproof, dependable, and easy to pitch. We also like how the tent is constructed with added protective layers that seniors will likely appreciate while outdoors.
Coleman Cobra 3 Three Person Backpacking Tent
LIGHT 3 PERSONS HIKING TENT: Very light and robust tent with 2 aluminium 7001-T6 pole arches, two entrances and two storage spaces for shoes and equipment, easy assembly and disassembly
WATERTIGHT AND WINDTIGHT: High quality polyester fabric and taped seams throughout, 3,000 mm water column, inner and outer tent for high breathability, waterproof, taped PE ground sheet
4) BISINNA Lightweight 2-Person Camping Tent – Best ultralight tent for seniors
“Very easy to put up and love that you can open both sides.”
About the BISINNA Lightweight 2-Person Camping Tent
For those in the market for compact and portable tents, check out this ultralight model from BISSINA. Weighing only a little over 2 kilograms—including its accessories—this is the best tent for seniors who wish to go hiking or trekking.
Building the tent is a breeze. It comes with a detailed assembly guide, and each component, except for the guy lines, is packed in dedicated storage bags that all fit in the carry bag. Even beginner campers find it so easy that they can finish setting everything up in just a few minutes.
Why this tent stands out:
The two D-shaped doors can be opened or closed using two-way zippers.
A layer of B3 No-See-Um mesh on the inner tent will prevent bugs from entering the tent.
A ceiling Velcro vent can be found on both sides of the flysheet for better air circulation.
It has a special handle in case you need to relocate the tent to a drier or less windy area.
The flysheet can be secured to or detached from the inner tent quickly through the buckle on each corner of the tent.
Pros and Cons
PROS
This tent is available in two bright colours—blue and orange—which allows seniors to see it better in low-light conditions.
It has enough space to accommodate a double-size air mattress for added comfort.
This tent can remain well-ventilated even when you close the doors for safety and privacy.
The mesh layer also has a pocket large enough for the occupants to store their eyeglasses, electronic devices, and other valuables.
BISINNA offers a 30-day moneyback guarantee, no questions asked.
CONS
The waterproof rating indicates that it is better suited for camping in warm and dry weather.
Some users noted that the included tent pegs quickly bend out of shape.
Tent Specifications:
Product Dimensions: 260 x 210 x 140 cm Capacity: 2 People Weight: 2.14 kg Waterproofing: 2000 mm HH Seasons: 3 seasons Included: Aluminium poles, tent pegs, wind ropes, fly sheet, and carry bag
Concluding thoughts:
The BISSINA Lightweight 2-Person Camping Tent is ideal for senior citizens who can’t wait to hit the trails. You can fit it inside the backpack and leave more room for the rest of your gear. Despite its ultralight status, this tent will not put you in danger of sunburn or shivering from the rain.
5) KIKILIVE Ultralight Tent – Best trekking tent for seniors
“It is now firmly part of my warmer weather lightweight pack and I’d definitely recommend it.”
About the KIKILIVE Ultralight Tent
Seniors eager to experience the joys of trekking should consider this amazingly light but robust tent perfect for people with limited mobility. It can also serve as your haven regardless of the season and wherever you want to go.
This tent model has ample space for two campers and their gear. It can also be used in two ways—with or without the flysheet—thus allowing you to get your money’s worth.
Why this tent stands out:
This tent’s silicon-coated nylon fabric offers significantly better waterproofing than similar models.
It has a reflection belt to make it more visible whenever the visibility in your chosen campsite is low.
You can experiment with the trekking pole height to adjust the tent’s ventilation depending on the weather.
When packed in its carry bag, it compresses into a size small enough for a regular camping backpack.
Every purchase of this tent automatically comes with two repair patches.
Pros and Cons
PROS
Many users report that the tent can be built up or folded in less than 10 minutes.
Any trekking pole of standard length may be used to erect this tent.
You can enter or exit the tent through either of the two large doors.
If you did camping food preparation ahead of the trip, the vestibules allow reheating food to be safely done during poor weather conditions.
The flysheet may be utilised separately as a makeshift awning or open-air lounge.
CONS
You need to purchase a trekking pole to assemble this tent since it is not included in the accessories.
The single inner mesh pocket may not be large enough for the valuables and necessities of two elderly occupants.
Tent Specifications:
Product Dimensions: 210 x 110 x 1.33 cm Capacity: 2 People Weight: 1.33 kg Waterproofing: 5000 mm HH Seasons: 4 seasons Included: Tent stakes, guy line, flysheet, repair patch, stake bag, and carry bag
Concluding thoughts:
The KIKILIVE Ultralight Camping Tent ranks high in our list of the best tents for senior citizens because it possesses many essential features for safe and enjoyable outdoor exploration. It’s a dependable companion not only for trekkers but also for anyone who wishes to experience nature in its various forms and different seasons.
6) GEERTOP 4 Season Alpine Tent – Best high-altitude tent for seniors
“This is a well made, reliable tent that suffers no condensation in sub zero temps and will cope easily with 60 mph winds.”
About the GEERTOP 4 Season Alpine Tent
As the name suggests, this tent is constructed to withstand extreme weather conditions due to the snow, frost and chilly wind in the mountains. It has the necessary features to shield seniors from harm while keeping them warm.
That said, it doesn’t mean you can only use this tent for mountaineering. With its 4-season design, you can bring it on your camping trips throughout the year.
Why this tent stands out:
The tent consists of layers of silicone-coated PU, polyester, and fine mesh to guarantee the interiors will be free from water leaks and condensation.
The bottom part has a snow guard around the entire tent.
Its bright red colour and reflective guy line make it easy to spot even during a storm or blizzard.
The strong yet flexible aluminium poles crisscross on top of the tent for better stability and wind resistance.
It has a corner pocket, ceiling pocket and lamp hook for multiple storage options.
Pros and Cons
PROS
This double-wall tent lowers the risk of condensation collecting inside the tent, especially in high-altitude campsites.
The tent’s flysheet, sealed seams, double-stitching, and waterproof groundsheet prevent water from leaking or seeping inside.
The dual-entry front porch can be used as a storage or cooking area.
It has zippers inside and outside each door.
Even when you close both doors, you can keep the air flowing within the tent by keeping the ceiling vents open.
CONS
We have seen reports from some users that the tent pegs can be pretty hard to secure to the ground.
Its attention-grabbing colour may not be suitable for wild camping trips.
Tent Specifications:
Product Dimensions: 310 x 120 x 100 cm Capacity: 2 People Weight: 2.8 kg Waterproofing: 8000 mm HH Seasons: 4 seasons Included: Aluminium poles, tent pegs, reflective guy line, and carry bag
Concluding thoughts:
We believe that the GEERTOP 4 Season Alpine Tent is the best tent for seniors who enjoy pushing their limits and thus expect their gear to keep up with their pace. Its excellent weatherproofing, durable materials and roomy interiors make it the ideal refuge when camping in places with harsh environmental conditions, like mountains, beaches, or forests.
7) Coleman Cortes 2 Tent – Best 4-season tent for seniors
“I liked the fact it does what it says keeps you warm in the winter and cool in the summer.”
About the Coleman Cortes 2 Tent
Whether planning a quick weekend getaway or an extended adventure, this 4 season tent is the best for senior citizens who yearn to experience the pleasures of camping without compromising comfort and convenience. With its simple-to-pitch design and ample interior space, virtually anyone can set up camp quickly and comfortably.
Made from quality materials, the Coleman Cortes 2 Tent features the brand’s proprietary technology to keep you warm and dry, regardless of weather conditions. This will give you the chance to recharge your energy and enjoy a peaceful night’s sleep outdoors.
Why this tent stands out:
This tunnel tent has a series of 3 parallel poles to keep it stable against the rain and wind.
The waterproof groundsheet is wholly sewn to the inner tent to prevent water and bugs from breaking into the tent.
It has a divider to separate the 2-person sleeping area from the rest of the tent.
The spacious front porch with two entrances can be used for storage or outdoor cooking.
Air vents can be found in the bedroom and antechamber to regulate the temperature and condensation formation.
Pros and Cons
PROS
Like other Coleman tents, the fire retardant fabric provides sun protection.
It can be assembled and disassembled quickly and without much effort.
Keeping things organised inside the tent is easy because of the tent’s layout and extra side pockets.
It can shield you from the elements regardless of what season it is.
Many users noted that the tent becomes relatively small and light when packed correctly in its carry bag.
CONS
The relatively muted colour of this tent might make it hard for seniors to see it in the dark.
The tent doors do not have a mesh layer to block flies and midges.
Tent Specifications:
Product Dimensions: 360 x 135 x 95 cm Capacity: 2 People Weight: 3.5 kg Waterproofing: mm HH Seasons: 4 seasons Included: Fibreglass poles, tent pegs, and guy lines
Concluding thoughts:
The Coleman Cortes 2 Tent is an excellent choice for elderly campers who wants a reliable all-season tent. Its spacious interiors and solid construction make it the ideal companion regardless of season. So, if you plan to make camping a hobby, consider investing in this tent to serve you well in the coming years.
8) BETENST 4-Person Pop-up Tent – Best beach tent for seniors
“The sturdy frame and guy lines offer stability, withstanding gusts of wind and providing peace of mind throughout the night.”
About the BETENST 4-Person Pop-up Tent
Pop-up tents might not be on the top of your mind when thinking of beach camping, but this BETENST model makes a strong case for itself. The tent’s stylish cream and brown colour can blend nicely with the scenery if you go wild camping near sandy areas like the magnificent beaches in Scotland.
This is also one of the best tents for senior citizens because it can be set up on your chosen campsite in just a few minutes. It can also hold strong even when beaten down by the breeze or a sudden downpour.
Why this tent stands out:
The automatic hydraulic system of this tent allows it to be constructed faster than traditional dome models.
The outer canvas and inner tent can be detached and used separately depending on the weather.
It has two mesh doors and two adjustable windows for adequate ventilation and viewing the scenery outside.
Removing the upper flap will give you access to a mesh-covered skylight.
The tent fabric offers protection against rain and UV rays.
Pros and Cons
PROS
This tent can be an all-weather accommodation in its complete form or as a sunshade if you use the outer tent only.
Seniors can quickly learn how to lock it in place and take it down through the details guide included in the package.
Fresh air can pass in and out of the tent smoothly through the multiple vents.
Bugs and midges cannot enter the tent because all doors, windows, and skylight have mesh lining.
It is suitable for any type of weather conditions.
CONS
The accumulated dirt and grime on the cream polyester can be pretty unsightly, thus requiring more frequent wiping or washing down.
There are no tent pegs or guy lines included.
Tent Specifications:
Product Dimensions: 210 x 210 x 110 cm Capacity: 4 People Weight: 4.94 kg Waterproofing: 3000 mm HH Seasons: 4 seasons Included: Fibreglass poles and carry bag
Concluding thoughts:
Elders can enjoy the beach without worries if they choose a practical and reliable companion like the BETENST 4-Person Pop-up Tent. You won’t have to spend too much time figuring out how to pitch a tent on the sand. It will stay in place even when the ocean breeze gets too intense.
9) Naturehike Cloud Peak Tent – Best wild camping tent for seniors
“It’s spacious, easy to erect and pack away.”
About the Naturehike Cloud Peak Tent
Seniors who wish to wild camp on their own or with a companion will likely find this tent exceeding their expectations. It’s an all-season protection with an intuitive design, solid frame, and waterproof yet breathable fabric.
It’s the best tent for seniors to invest in if they prefer to admire nature in relative peace. They won’t have to worry about getting wet from the rain or snow or being blown away by the wind, thus allowing them to immerse in the moment.
Why this tent stands out:
The double wall structure helps regulate the temperature and prevent condensation.
A separate piece serves as a waterproof roof to minimise the risk of water leaks.
The tent poles follow a cross-support design to improve wind resistance.
It employs a new metal lock plate for added stability.
The manufacturer provides 16 ground nails for free to ensure you will have extra as needed.
Pros and Cons
PROS
Seniors can pitch this tent in under ten minutes.
It is light and compact enough to fit inside the backpack.
The tent comes in dark blue or forest green so you can pick according to your preference.
Solo campers will have ample space for sleeping and storage.
This model has dual doors for easy access in and out of the tent.
CONS
The flysheet does not reach the ground.
Some users noted that on windy days, the roof makes a flapping sound when it is not secured tightly.
Tent Specifications:
Product Dimensions: 210 x 130 x 105 cm Capacity: 2 People Weight: 2.6 kg Waterproofing: 3000 mm HH Seasons: 4 seasons Included: Aluminium poles, tent stakes, guy lines, flysheet, and carry bag
Concluding thoughts:
The Naturehike Cloud Peak Tent is another testament to the brand’s commitment to quality and safe camping gear. From its build to its features, you can really tell the difference. Therefore, this lightweight 2-person tent can be an excellent investment for seniors who want something straightforward yet effective at providing comfort and all-weather protection.
10) Coleman Darwin 4 Plus Tent – Best family tent for seniors
“All in all, it’s well worth the money and I will get a lot of use out of it.”
About the Coleman Darwin 4 Plus Tent
Having outdoor excursions with the family can be challenging, especially when you must factor in the unique needs of older adults and children. This top-rated large camping tent from Coleman offers comfort and convenience to every family member.
Seniors will realise how effortless it is to spend quality time with their loved ones, provided they have a spacious dependable tent like this model. They can also make the most of this investment since the tent can handle any weather.
Why this tent stands out:
The ring and pin attachments simplify the process of arranging the tent poles securely.
The brand applied its WeatherTec technology to enhance the waterproof capabilities of the tent.
You won’t have to worry about skin damage while staying inside the tent because of its UV Guard 50+ protective fabric.
The sleeping chamber has a separate door from the main entrance for privacy and bug control.
The front porch is made with a riser groundsheet to prevent water from spilling inside.
Pros and Cons
PROS
The extended dome structure gives more room for the campers and their gear.
It has various practical storage options, including a vestibule and pockets in the inner tent.
The tent can be used during spring, summer, fall, or winter.
You can set up the porch for food preparation, cooking, and dining.
Moisture won’t accumulate inside because of the vents and windows.
CONS
Some seniors might not find it as portable as the other family tents.
The tent has only one large entrance for all occupants
Tent Specifications:
Product Dimensions: 340 x 280 x140 cm Capacity: 4 People Weight: 6.15 kg Waterproofing: 3000 mm HH Seasons: 4 seasons Included: Fibreglass poles, tent pegs, guy lines, and carry bag
Concluding thoughts:
The models under the Coleman Darwin series are all exceptional considerations for the best tents for senior citizens. The 4 Plus, particularly, captured our attention for its generous layout, compact form, and excellent weatherproofing. It can be part of your family’s essential gear for outdoor day trips or extended holidays.
What to look for in a camping tent for senior citizens
To help you evaluate your options for the best tents for seniors, we will share below the four major factors that you should consider:
Portability
Most senior citizens are not as strong or agile as they used to be. Therefore, the ideal backpacking tent for them should be light enough to carry during the trip.
Convenience
Bending down or manoeuvring various pieces can also be challenging for seniors. Their camping tent must be easy to assemble and take down to avoid injuries and frustration.
Weatherproofing
The best tent for seniors should be able to resist strong winds, heavy rains, or snow. There must be adequate ventilation to keep the occupants cool during summer and dry when winter camping.
Space
Seniors will likely bring extra items to stay safe, comfortable, and healthy during the trip. A good tent layout with extra pockets and vestibules would ensure they can move around and keep everything else dry and secured.
Best tent for seniors buyers guide
Let’s break down further the essential qualities of the best tents for senior citizens. Please refer to this guide while exploring the various models available today. This will help you narrow your choices to those matching your budget while delivering your expectations for a cosy refuge after spending the day on outdoor adventures.
Tent size
Older adults may want to consider a larger tent with more headroom. Such models provide more space to keep their belongings and aids well organised. A higher ceiling will also lessen the need to bend, crouch, or crawl inside the tent.
However, you can’t just go for the biggest tent available. Remember, the larger the tent is, the heavier and bulkier it will be.
Capacity
When assessing the best tents for senior citizens, we suggest selecting a tent that can accommodate more people than the actual campers who will stay and sleep in it. More often than not, maximising the indicated capacity of the tent means sacrificing comfort and sleep quality.
To increase the likelihood of getting a good night’s rest while camping, look for a model with a slightly higher capacity than required—for instance, a two-person tent for a single elderly camper.
Weight
The gross weight of the tent must be within the senior’s ability to carry it around. This will also affect how easily they can set up the campsite or pack the gear afterwards.
A good backpacking tent with inclusions for seniors should not exceed 5 kilograms. Anything more than that will be more suitable for car camping.
Waterproofing
The best tents for seniors are constructed with waterproof materials, wherein all seams are sealed. This is critical even if your trip is during summertime or your destination is relatively dry. After all, the weather can be unpredictable, and people in their later years tend to be more susceptible to the elements.
A tent with a waterproof rating of at least 3000 mm HH and suitable for all seasons will be a good investment since you can use it, even on a rainy or snowy day.
Portability
As explained earlier, the best tent for senior citizens is light and compact. However, this is not just a matter of weight only—portability is also influenced by the carry bag.
Most tent models come with a bag specifically designed for it. Not every bag is suitable for older people, though. Check the reviews if the users find it simple or challenging to put back the tent after use to its carry bag. If the tent is too bulky or the bag is too tight, seniors might encounter issues on the campsite later during the trip.
Ease of setup
The best tents for seniors highlight their instant or quick setup, wherein the entire structure can be pitched or taken down in a few minutes, even if done by a single person only.
Pop-up models tend to be the easiest, especially with the introduction of hydraulic systems. On the other hand, many traditional tents have simplified the process by employing the pin-and-ring system, colour-coded poles, or a combination of both.
Windows and Doors
Windows and doors serve more than just access points to view and admire the scenery within the comforts of the tent. These features ensure adequate ventilation within its interiors. When air can pass in and out, the area will stay nice and dry because of minimal condensation formation.
The best tent for seniors must also have at least two doors if they go on a trip with a companion. This will allow everyone to enter or exit the tent without stepping over the other person or asking them to move to give way to you.
Material
The best tents for senior citizens are made of durable material that can withstand strong winds and heavy rains or snow. Thick waterproof fabric is not necessarily ideal—it should also be breathable to prevent the buildup of moisture inside the tent.
Pay attention to the tent poles, too. Those made of aluminium alloys usually offer a good balance of strength, flexibility, and price. However, stainless steel poles can be a good alternative if you’re on a budget. Fibreglass poles are even more cost-effective, but we recommend using them in fair weather conditions.
Ventilation
As explained earlier, seniors should look for tents with good ventilation systems to prevent health issues caused by the lack of fresh air and exposure to excessive moisture.
In addition to doors and windows, the air can circulate inside the tent through vents. These features can usually be found near the ground or on the ceiling, and you can open them in case you need to close the larger openings of the tent.
Room darkening technology
Blocking out the light helps the elderly sleep faster and more soundly. Though you can technically wear sleep masks, that might not be enough to relax your body and mind for a nap, especially on a hot and bright day.
Manufacturers that offer this feature construct tents using fabric that can filter up around 90% of sunlight. As an added benefit, the technology also lowers the temperature inside the tent, thus making it feel cooler during the daytime and warmer at night.
Design
Inspect the tent’s design to determine how dependable and comfortable it will be during the camping trip. The standard design features of the best tents for seniors include roomier interiors, expandible vestibules, and built-in groundsheets.
We recommend carefully going through the specifications of the tent model to evaluate its design versus the needs and expectations of an elderly camper. In our experience, we also noted that complexity does not guarantee quality since simpler designs may allow seniors can set up the tent faster and easier.
Most important features of a tent for seniors
When looking for the ideal camping tent, your unique needs and preferences will significantly influence your final decision. However, we believe that everyone should consider the features listed below as must-haves for seniors.
Light but durable construction
The tent and its accessories should be made of lightweight materials that can still hold strong against downpours and gusts of wind.
Intuitive assembly and disassembly system
Setting up or taking down the tent must be simple enough for seniors to learn and carry out without too much time and effort.
Multiple access points
Having more than one door on different sides of the tent allows better mobility and comfort for the occupants.
Spacious interiors
There must be enough for the seniors to lie down comfortably and store their valuables securely.
Mesh lining
Fine mesh prevents the intrusion of pesky bugs while also facilitating proper air circulation inside the tent.
Invest in the perfect camping tent for senior citizens
Age should never be a barrier when exploring nature and its many wonders. By investing in the best tents for seniors, they can embark on memorable outdoor activities without compromising their safety, health, and comfort.
We hope our recommendations have enlightened you in evaluating your options and determining the ideal tent for your dream camping trip. In case no tent offers all of your desired features, consider prioritising the models that possess the essential qualities of a tent that most elderly require for the trip—durability, ease of use, accessibility, and comfort.
Once you have a shortlist, dig deeper to learn more about what our fellow campers have to say about the product. Pay attention to each model’s pros and cons to set realistic expectations. Doing so will give you the peace of mind that you are making the right decision for your future outdoor adventures.
FAQs about tents for seniors
What tents for seniors can withstand heavy rain?
First, the best weather-resistant camping tents for seniors should have a waterproof rating of 3000 mm HH or higher. All seams must be sealed to prevent moisture from leaking into the tent. Heavy rains can also cause flooding, so tents with a bathtub floor design will keep water from entering and pooling inside.
What is the most stable tent shape for seniors?
The intersecting triangles forming a geodesic tent make it incredibly steady and resistant to the wind. Such tents are typically portable and easy to set up but tend to be pricier than most of their counterparts in the market. A good alternative for seniors is a tunnel tent. When pitched at an angle to the wind, this type can hold well against harsh weather conditions because of its parallel arches.
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what are you wearing right now: Pyjamas bc i haven't left my house in 3 days
how tall are you?: a solid 5'5 on a good day
piercings/tattoos?: sooo many ideas for a bunch of tiny fine line tattoos but waiting until autumn to get them so they can be healed by next summer. Got my ears pierced tho and that's as far as I'll go
glasses? Contacts?: i have reading glasses (society says im a young woman i say im a senior citizen) that i should use but don't use.
last thing you ate?: blueberry muffin
favourite colour(s): idk if it's a colour but anything opal. obsessed!! with!! opals!!
current obsession: this dumb game about a single dad and his lesbian daughter idk if you ever heard of it. oh and fish. pretty obsessed with fish as of late.
any pets: want to get a fish.
do you have a crush right now?: i have a crushed soul is what i have
favourite fictional character: if i answer that everyone is gonna think i have issues and i do. it's catherine tramell from basic instinct. like yes she's a killer but god forbid a woman does anything
last place you traveled: somewhere down the south of where i live but it was a work trip
Tagged by: Technically by @miilr
Tagging: YOU
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Best solitaire app for mac
BEST SOLITAIRE APP FOR MAC HOW TO
BEST SOLITAIRE APP FOR MAC TRIAL
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Been playing this for years, like the daily challenge. Think I’ll turn this off and find another. I’m not quick but enjoy trying for a low card count now I can’t compare my count with others. What have you done to one of my favourite games? Just updated and wish I hadn’t. Perhaps I will get into the " Guinness Book of Records" 🥇 I even don't mind the adverts!! I still hope to be playing when I am a 100. The Halloween background for the daily games is great. I love the background changes, especially looking forward to the Christmas background. Times are much the same, but some days are faster.
BEST SOLITAIRE APP FOR MAC CRACK
It is part of my daily routine, and I always manage to crack it. The only time I don't play is when I have no internet. Thank you keep the good work up.Īdding to the above it is now Friday 13th October 2017. I also enjoy the off line version as it helps with waiting in airports etc. Testing myself on a regular basis is essential for the good feel factor. I am trying to improve my timings but have to face the fact that there are some truly fast players!! I am a senior citizen which enables me to keep my brain alert and to use my memory. I have been playing this game since Nov 2014 and my day starts with the daily challenge. A subscription cannot be cancelled in the middle of its term. Subscriptions may be stopped by turning off automatic renewal at least 24 hours before the end of the current period. Purchasers can manage their subscription and turn off automatic renewal in their Account Settings. The subscriber's iTunes Account will be charged for a renewal in the last 24 hours of the current period. Renewal prices are US$1.99 per month, US$4.99 per every three months, or US$14.99 per year. Subscriptions renew automatically unless automatic renewal is turned off at least 24 hours before the end of the current term.
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Any unused portion of a free trial period is forfeited when a subscription is purchased. The subscriber's iTunes Account will be charged when the purchase is confirmed. New subscribers can choose a one-week trial subscription at no cost. You can subscribe to Solitaire for a term of one month, three months or for one year. Solitaire Subscription is an optional subscription that gives you access to seamless play without any ads, the ability to play future Daily Challenges and exclusive themes. Four Exclusive Themes with Four Gorgeous Card Sets! Ability to play future Daily Challenges! Download now to play the best classic Solitaire card game on iOS now!ĮXCLUSIVE FEATURES WITH SUBSCRIPTION SERVICE Join over 100 million users playing Solitaire for iOS! Our version of Solitaire is free and is the most popular in the Play Store! Take on our Daily Challenges for a new Solitaire experience each and every day. Try some of our other games:įor answers to frequently asked questions, head over to MobilityWare makes the best card games on the App Store. = More Fun Card Games from MobilityWare = Custom Settings: Play right or left-handed, portrait or landscape, standard or vegas scoring, and adjust hands to draw-1 or draw-3 Leaderboards & Statistics: See how you stack up against other players, or try to beat your own high score
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Show Me How To Win: Improve your strategy by using the “Show Me How To Win” feature Customization: Change your background, card backs and card faces for a personalized experience Stickers: Send cute reaction stickers to your friends through iMessage Winning Deals: Play deals where you know there is at least one winning solution Levels & Titles: Earn points every time you play to level up and achieve new titles Daily Challenges: Earn crowns & trophies by solving each day’s new challenge You can draw one card at a time for a more relaxing game, or draw three for a challenge to train your brain! When you can, move cards up to the foundation to sort all of the suits from Ace to King. Tap or drag cards to arrange them in descending order with alternating colors. Whether you know it as Patience, Klondike, or just Solitaire, this popular game is one of the best games around. The addictive game you’ve been playing on your computer for years now goes wherever you do. Make sure to try out our unique Daily Challenges! After more than 10 years on the App Store we are STILL improving our card game with fun new features. Solitaire by MobilityWare is the ORIGINAL maker of Solitaire free for iPad and iPhone.
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adam is old man. he is over a 1000 years old. every aspect of human life is nostalgia inducing for him. hes like ah i remember those from Before… and drifts off into memory and hes just looking at a fucking traffic light. he should walk with his hands behind his back and sit in rocking chairs and stay completely still while watching as the sun rise
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the true tragedy of the loki series is the fact that it made me find owen wilson attractive
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was looking through 911 accs & i’ve decided i’m gonna take my bathena + madney content and go 🧍♀️
#my favourite mini senior citizens <3#henren are really cute too happy pride month to them :’))#i’m almost finishing season 3#nah cause i’m not gonna get wound up in main ship drama no more for now#got all i needed to know about this drama from twitter (a bloodfield but an accurate gauge — from experience unfortunately)#lol but ngl i’m seeing a pattern#for the record so far they both seem like good ships but no more of that for me#keyword being so far but guess i’ll see when i finish season 4#unconsciously sticking to side ships for now#head empty just bathena! 🥺#when i finish season 4 and rewatch their scenes and maybe get back on the editing grind for them >>>#bobby nash a GOOD MAN! i adore him#i don’t need to look through crevices of the net to know bobby is really underrated tho… meh that’s sad he’s so precious :(#athena carter can arrest me any day lmao
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don’t be shy,
post sum of those drafts
pairing: peter parker x avenger!reader
a/n: you asked and you shall receive. here are very random scraps that i pieced together and somehow it worked lol enjoy x
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───
the avengers on long bus rides
long bus rides are the only times where the world is balanced and at peace (forced smile from steve)
it’s also the only times when everyone will chime in on those sea shanties that steve loves so much, so that’s a plus
the team knows that their captain is a sea shanty WHORE so they always go all out for him and do harmonies and quite impressive choreos
once they’ve run out of sea shanties, they switch to musicals and it’s kind of like football jocks meet theatre kids
everyone has their troy bolten moment at some point, but it’s loki who really shines
he gets really passionate and ends up singing all parts and no one can blame him because mans got the voice of an angel and he knows it
nat is super supportive and cheers him on while recording everything. no one questions why she has a folder on her phone that is called “blackmail material”
tony likes to show his support by throwing money at loki
the others reenact that scene from harry potter where harry tries to catch hogwarts letters falling from the ceiling although there are loads of them perfectly lying on the floor
they fight tooth and nail to catch the money with a ferocity that puts the gods in shame
peter shoots his webs to pin the dollar bills to the wall like he suddenly got a lifelong supply of them and clint acts like his arrows are made of harmless rubber
rhodey joins in, puts on his suit, and almost blasts happy ✨to death✨while trying to catch a one-dollar bill
happy swerve the bus off a cliff and someone screams
(it was loki)
wanda has to save them and proceeds to bench them all for an hour
bucky, friend to no vehicles, is grumpy the entire time but y/n has made it her temporary calling to cheer him up
“i don’t like vehicles and this is why” *y/n whips out a duffel bag and slaps it* “yea, well, but what are your thoughts on sudokus”
bucky curls up in the back like the senior citizen that he is, sandwiched between y/n and bruce with a lifelong supply of sudokus scattered around him
they quietly help each other out and it’s very wholesome
tony and peter can fall asleep anywhere on the bus with their necks and limbs turned at all kinds of unnatural angles and sam winces before tearing his eyes from them
he makes a mental note to buy them neck pillows
nat suggests playing ‘i spy’ because it seems less lethal than the yellow car game but clint, sam, and thor get way too enthusiastic about it
they have their faces pressed against the window, eyes wide and unblinking, unaware that they’re frightening half of the people sitting in the passing cars
at some point, they lose all sense and just randomly name everything
“i spy with my little eye something that is red” “that car” “no” “that car” “no” “clint’s sweater” “it’s not—” “bucky’s pen, the flowERS, MY SHOES, THE SKY”
rhodey and nat are surprisingly good at that game and their calm demeanour drives the others insane
“fine. i spy with my stupid little eye something that is amber—” “bottom left button on the inside of loki’s overcoat, try again”
wanda and vision are in charge of lunch and handing out lunch boxes to everyone is a delight to them and a very. scary experience for the rest of the team
“here you go, buck. a turkey sandwich with cut off crust and extra tomatoes” “oh you didn’t have to cut off—” “😠but you like it. don’t you😠” “...yes”
peter and y/n are sharing a seat and y/n shows him her online purchases on her phone. peter is really sweet the entire time and comments on everything with genuine interest until rhodey pipes up from behind them
“you ordered new shoes? y/n, you don’t even go outside enough to justify wearing shoes”
they shush him and proceed to share headphones to listen to peter’s current favourite songs
at some point, tony announces, “alright ladies and gentlegerms, cap is making us stop the bus so we can get out and go for a two-mile jog through the woods *unenthusiastic jazz hands* if anyone wants to fling us off a cliff again, now is the time, i repeat—”
they still end up running and it’s insufferable. it’s hot and musty and just ~unpleasant~
somehow the avengers have evolved into a chaotic Debate Team and now they’re discussing who gets to be carried by thor and bucky
at an intersection, the two of them stop to catch their breath and they’re both just staring at each other, sweaty and covered in avengers hanging off their limbs
thor, prying loki off his back: “i’m sorry but we’re gonna have to do something different here”
y/n is hopping off bucky’s back when there’s suddenly a loud, ugly sound reverberating through the forest, followed by many footsteps that seem to come closer by the second
they run
branches keep tearing at their skin as they bolt through the woods but they’re not stopping because it’s clear what is happening right now
they’re being chased by wild boars
at this point they’re just embracing death and if they survive it’s a bonus
a boar comes running towards bucky and wanda but bucky “i have been falling for 90 years and i’m sick of it” barnes stares it straight in the eye, daring it to knock them over and the boar just squirms and make a u-turn
another wild boar seems to have decided that clint is not part of the herd because it sends clint FLYING in a quite impressive and beautiful arc
steve tries to ditch clint and train the boar
clint wasn’t hurt by the fall, but he stares at steve as if he might as well have broken a rib
they’re back on the bus and happy cocks a brow when he sees that everyone is exhausted and covered in dirt. he chooses to say nothing when nat climbs in with loki half-leaning on her for support and glaring broodily at the floor
everyone just wants to sleep and forget that the avengers were almost defeated by boars but bruce and sam keep bickering in the front row
“it’s too bright in here” “it’s the sun” “the lights get too noisy” “…what” “make it stop” “what do you want me to do?? turn off the sun???”
peter and y/n are huddled in a seat again, sharing headphones to drone out the noise and the moment he hits play, y/n looks at him blankly
peter, shrugging: “what? my 7 songs still go hard”
* * *
what are your seven songs that still go hard? pls tell me bc i desperately need new music <3 stay hydrated pals
hc masterlist
#peter parker x reader#peter parker x y/n#peter parker x avenger!reader#avengers crack#avengers x reader#avengers headcanon#peter parker headcanon#peter parker fluff#avengers#peter parker#steve rogers headcanon#tony stark headcanon#bucky barnes headcanon#sam wilson headcanon#thor headcanon#loki headcanon#mcu#mcu x reader#peter parker x you#spiderman x reader#avenger!reader
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Y'ALL!!!! I GOT A BUNCH OF ANON HATE TODAY, OMLLLL, AHAHHAH
fucking FINALLY i was wondering when it would start, and DAMN i woke up to a goddamn GOLD MINE!!!!!!
okay okay, i screenshotted it all, so we can laugh at it together.... so sit back, relax, grab your popcorn and your favourite blanket and let's begin.........*clears throat*
1. damn, same. thank god there are people like you, praying for me, amirite??
2. anon, you're so right! it is stupid written, well... not stupid. but... stupidly? that would be the grammatically correct term... but i guess when you're rushing to spew out as much hate as possible on anon, you can't think about things like that, huh? <3
3. *clasps hands* anon. thank you. i thought whatever i do on earth is stricktly my business, like, between me and god, but i guess, we're having a threesome? like, me, God and........ you, anon? pray for me. keep praying for my, dirty, dirty soul, oh HARDER anon... <3
4.
5. anon, how do you know my parents aren't 1000% aware of what im doing.. and are on board with it..... are you...... anon are you bruno??? living i my walls??????👀 naughty, naughty anon... (also, hate to be that person, but it's *your parents, baby boo <3 )
6. *drops head* anon..... you found out my biggest secret, I AM ACTUALLY A VIRGIN!!!! i have never seen a dick or a titty up close, ever in my life before..... :( oh no. how am i supposed to live with this shame now???
7. *leans back into bed* harder, daddy~
8. mhhh, can't agree, anon, dear. selfish??? no. shellfish??? yeah, definitely. i am the crab from moana, sucking at your toes as we speak
9. oh, honeyyyyyyy <3 i have a wonderful thing for you, it's called ☆the block button☆! there are plenty of wonderful authors out there, who definitely aren't as monstrous as i am, and, well, write for Thor, or Iron Man, or whoever you want!!!! isn't it amazing that tumblr, and the ENTIRE INTERNET doesn't just consist out of my blog???????? that might be a lot to process, but I promise you it's true!!! <3<3
so you can like, actually AVOID reading the content you dislike, and leave people, who write about canon senior citizens (bruno is 50, mind you) be??? crazy concept, i know.... :/
***
Well, alrightey folks, that's it for today! I'll be off to write more smut, and this is gonna be the only time I'm posting anon hate on here.
ppl like them don't phase me in the slightest, my self depreciation skills don't even come close to what any of them have sent me, or could ever send me in the future... anon/anons may hate me, but they will nevere EVER hate me, as much as i hate myself :-**
love to you all, wonderful ppl of my blog, hope you're having a good day, and that we all got a good ol laugh outta that! much love to you all!!! <3<3<3
– no-name
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Some things that made 2021 a little more bearable....
Just a collection of movies/books/tv shows that I was into in 2021.
- “Off With Their Heads: A Serio-Comic Tale of Hollywood”, Frances Marion, 1972.
- “Black Sails”. Late to the party, but I see now why this show enjoys a vigorous afterlife on Tumblr.
- “Emily in Paris”. Pure sugar, and not memorable, but enjoyable nonetheless.
- “It’s a Sin”, which also meant that I had to rediscover my love of the Pet Shop Boys
- “The Ghost & Mrs. Muir”, 1947. I loved it so much I also read the book! The sitcom from the late 60′s was cute and didn’t shy away from the romance, but that’s about it (you can find it on YouTube, if you’re curious).
- “Laura”, 1944. Again, I loved it so much I also read the book! Dana Andrews became my new favourite leading man.
- “Gilda”, 1946. I had NO IDEA that this movie was kinky.
- “Blood and Sand”, 1941. Will never like Tyrone Power, but Rita Hayworth and Anthony Quinn have a smokin’ hot dance number. I never finished watching the 1922 version with Rudolph Valentino, but I should. Did you know that there’s also a cocktail named “Blood and Sand”?
- “The King and I”, 1956. Honestly, it’s all about the “Shall We Dance?” number. “Anna and the King” from 1999, on the other hand, was a total snooze.
- “Loki” because SYLKI!!!
- “Our Modern Maidens”, 1929. Douglas Faibanks Jr. became my new NEW favourite leading man.
- “The Thief of Baghdad”, 1922, just because I had to see how Fairbanks Senior compared.
- “Let Us Be Gay”, 1930. I will watch anything with Queen Norma Shearer, and this led me to the plays of Rachel Crothers.
- “Citizen Hearst”, “The Cat’s Meow” and “The Times We Had: My Life with W.R. Hearst” by Marion Davies. Never could understand their relationship...
- “Britannia” Season 3. There had better be a heartfelt reunion in Season 4 or Jez Butterworth will be hearing from me!
- “Downton Abbey” rewatch. Tom Branson is love, and that’s all there is to it.
#dowton abbey#tom branson#britannia#britannia tv#Britannia Season3#loki#loki tv series#gilda#the king and i#blood and sand#rudolph valentino#rita hayworth#Our Modern Maidens#Douglas Fairbanks Jr.#douglas fairbanks#let us be gay#norma shearer#Laura#dana andrews#ghost and mrs. muir#it's a sin#emily in paris#Black Sails#frances marion#marion davies#w.r. hearst#sylki
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500 Followers Appreciation Bitty Profiles! (+ Bonus bitty!) (ALL FREE TO ADOPT)
Fellswap Gold Lamia Bittys
Merlot
Snake: Taipan
Venomous?: Yes
Size (Bitty): Length - 0.5-1m (1.6-3.3 ft.), Standing - 0.25-0.5m (0.8-1.6 ft)
Size (Full Sized): Length - 1.5-2m (5-6 ft), Standing 1-1.25m (3-5 ft)
Merlots are very calm and soothing bittys, they always seem to have it together. It can be easy to let them take control of things – you always feel like they have your best interests at heart. Merlots are very distinguished, they don’t appreciate looking disheveled, it gives them an almost “old man” quality. A Merlot’s nest is impeccably clean – you may even find a doily or two! And they somehow have a bowl of no-name candy to offer guests like a strange satire on how seniors live everywhere. However he had an eye for quality and doesn’t accept poor quality furnishings. While a Merlot doesn’t mind taking charge, he appreciates an adopter who takes initiative. A Merlot isn’t above using intimidation to get his way, but he’s so smooth about it you have a hard time noticing! He prides himself in being unflappable, to demand respect without screaming for it. He certainly has a devious side – he didn’t get this far without knowing how to “play the game” and isn’t above a few white lies for the sake of it. He can be quite paternal as well, he enjoys taking younger bittys under his “wing” and helping raising them. While he can seem rather stiff he’s actually a warm-hearted bitty who enjoys cuddles and being needed.
Espresso
Snake: Black-tailed Criibo
Venomous?: No
Size (Bitty): Length - 0.75-1m (2.4-3.3 ft), Standing - 0.25-0.5m (0.8-1.6 ft)
Size (Full Sized): Length - 2-2.5m (7-8.5 ft), Standing - 1-1.5m (3-5 ft)
Despite the name: Espressos aren’t very active bittys. They mostly prefer the quiet – gaming and drawing are their favourite hobbies. They tend to be shy and soft spoken – loud people can startle them into muteness and a lot of the time they prefer to communicate in non-verbal ways. If you want a gaming companion an Espresso is your perfect bitty match: but be warned – gaming is a fixation for them. If you ask them to not continue a game until you can play it together later it’s almost unfair to them, they’ll become obsessed with what’s next. Games with both single player and co-op content is more ideal – he can work on the single player campaign while he waits for you to come back to the co-op campaign. His shyness makes multi-player gaming a bit hit or miss – he doesn’t like gaming where a lot of communication and strategy is necessary – he prefers staying quiet and working towards objective without any instruction given or taken. His exception is co-op, he loves playing games together with you and feels his most accomplished when you both complete a challenging level together. He isn’t super competitive but takes pride in his skills so be careful setting up play-dates with bittys that may not appreciate losing to a quiet, seemingly submissive bitty. Despite his quiet and gentle nature he isn’t one to allow people to take advantage of him or disrespect him – he will stand up for himself, usually by exiting the situation instead of getting into an argument, and when pushed, he WILL fight back. He is surprisingly skilled and controls his magic well.
G!Siblings Ampitheres
So I decided to give my ampitheres the same human-like intelligence of all my other lamia bittys, but restrict them to a one-size bitty like my Harpys. Honestly a full size ampithere’s wingspan would make them pretty tough to house indoors…
Suave
Snake: Bolen’s Python
Venomous?: No
Size: 1-1.5m long (3-5ft), 0.5m (2ft) standing
Suaves pride themselves on being, well, suave and flirtatious – it helps them stay in control of the conversation and relationship so you don’t discover how much of a dork they really are. Suaves inherited Gaster’s love or building important monuments – like the Core. He’s interested in work that will stand the test of time, with the added benefit of being practical. He’s not interested in building, say: the Pyramids for vainglory. But, if that Pyramid was covered in solar panels that provided electricity for the nearby citizens – that’s up his alley. He also has an interest in motorized vehicles like cars, trucks and motorcycles – but he admits he’d have a difficult time using one without a lot of modifications. Which could be fun. Suaves love flashy experiments and inventions that leave an impact on his audience: however, when he’s working on his next big thing he ends up working at all hours of the night in his pajamas. His inspirations are flashes of brilliance and a flurry of work, after which, he collapses into a deep sleep for up to 36 hours. Despite appearances Suaves are huge nerds who love to share their work with interested listeners and isn’t above goofy shenanigans. They share a Sans’ sense of humour and laid back attitude – but it’s a mask to cover the whirling chaos of the mind within. Suaves can be surprisingly immature and will get a kick out of pranks and childish humour. A Suave can summon up to four disembodied “hands” to help him work on projects that require dexterity but doesn’t often use constructs in offensive magic. He’s more of a behind-the-scenes guy – but he can certainly manage bone attacks.
Savvy
Snake: Amazon Tree Boa
Venomous?: No
Size: 1.25-1.75m long (4-6ft), 0.75m (2.5ft) standing
While Suaves are the rock star scientists, the Savvys end up being in the babysitter role more times than they’d like. Savvys inherited Gaster’s interest in the soul and physical health of monsters and humans; since Savvys are on the autistic spectrum it helps them understand others better because, although they have trouble empathizing with others, it does not mean they don’t CARE. I head-cannon that smoking is a Gaster-trait and a Savvy’s Papyrus half REFUSES to participate in such a disgusting habit! Therefore Savvy’s tend to have an oral fixation to make up for the lack of smoking: chewing on the end of pencils, pens, their own tails… and rely far too much on caffeine. A Savvy works hard, but on a schedule and his experiments are always tightly controlled as opposed to a Suave’s scientific method. Savvys are polite, distinguished and a bit absent minded when it comes to personal relationships. If you’re looking for a bitty that will faun over you – look elsewhere. While Savvy’s certainly care about their adopters and family they are independent and self sufficient. They can seem humourless but the right touch can send them into giggles, they are very passionate about their interests and appreciate an interested audience (or at least captive). Savvys enjoy being needed and do well in situations where they can work as doctor’s, biologists or psychologists. They’re not judgmental and they like to look at the world with endless curiosity and enthusiasm! Savvys can summon up to four disembodied “hands” to help him work on projects that require dexterity but prefers to use his magical energies in his studies and use of healing magic. His offensive magic abilities are rather stunted because of this.
Bonus Lamia Bitty - Blueberror
Blue Ribbon
Snake: Blue striped Ribbon Snake
Venomous?: No
Size (Bitty): 0.5-1m (1.6-3ft), 0.3m standing
Size (Full Sized):1-1.5m (3-5ft) 0.5m standing
Ribbons are afraid of being alone (autophobic), they know that being alone in the anti-void is what caused their transformations from Blueberries to Blueberrors. They thrive in large families and want to be seen as a friend and protector by the group. Do not adopt one of these guys if you spend a lot of time out of the home and can’t provide them attention. A bitty family is a good stop-gap but they really need validation and one-on-one time with their adopters. Ribbons retain most of their personality traits from their Blueberry days but they’re a little… off. A little, too intense. Ribbons can get caught up in an emotion or situation and can spiral out of control whether the emotion is: joy, anger, frustration, or fear. They need a patient friend who can help them “reset” their emotional clock. Of course, being an Error, it sometimes causes a hard crash that they need to restart from. Depending on the situation they can forget completely what had set them off and will continue along like nothing happened. Other times, they remember what happened but the restart gave them enough time to reprocess so they can move on and get past what set them off. They can get depressed easily especially is someone is afraid or intimidated by him – he knows he’s different now, but he’s still a good guy at heart! A Ribbons magic is star-based – they create star-shaped attacks and can even summon a star to ride around on like Kirby.
Creators
Blueberror created by @loverofpiggies
Fellswap Gold AU created by @blackggggum
G!Sans created by @bouru
Art
Fellswap Gold Sans & Papyrus + Blueberror Lamias commissioned from @calmchapsart
G!Siblings Ampitheres commissioned from @me-and-my-gaster
all art commissioned by me: @sealpointselkie / @selkiesbittybonanza
#adoptable#adoptables#adoptable bittys#lamiatale#500+ follower appreciation#fellswap gold#fellswap gold sans#fellswap gold papyrus#fellswap gold lamia#fellswap gold lamia bittys#lamia bitty#lamia bittys#g!sans#g!papyrus#g!siblings#g!siblings bitty#g!siblings lamia bitty#g!sans lamia bitty#g!papyrus lamia bitty#blueberror lamia bitty#blueberror#merlot lamia bitty#full size merlot#merlot bitty#espresso lamia bitty#full size espresso#espresso bitty#savvy ampithere bitty#suave ampithere bitty#ampithere
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talk about kaz!! we would like to hear 🥺
i love you. thank you for enabling me. i will now say five things i like the most abt his character:
1) first off i would die over the symbolism of his name. like. it’s just so good even though it’s like super cliché to have a character with a name meaning “peace” be a war guy. but it’s like. deeper than that also u know...
his whole existence is a byproduct of war given he was born in 1946, post-war japan. his background is i think an interesting commentary on growing up in that time period while having an absent father who is a part of the american military that brought destruction to his mother’s country. and his mother still chose to name him peace.
he goes hard for pmcs during pw and at one point and because of the whole msf thing he steeps his whole person in a drive for revenge and for violence, but even then later in life he dedicates himself to fighting against big boss’ dream of a world in constant war. like. at that point he’s fighting war for some semblance of peace i guess, albeit in a really roundabout way. parallels to david snake too, there. maybe kinda shows you how much influence he had on him. you love to see it!
2) on a related note the whole “i may act like i’m cold and heartless and angry with everything in the world but the truth is i genuinely care about this thing i’ve helped build so much that i’m scared to think about loosing everything again, and i want to get revenge on cipher not only because of the hurt i carry and the want for revenge for those whose lives were lost but also because of the guilt i feel about letting cipher onto mother base in the first place to inevitably destroy everything i cared about and the fear it could happen again” thing that was going on in tpp really gets me
i love kaz’s entire character arc in tpp tbh and the ways he’s changed and the ways he continues to change, both good and bad. and the thing i hate most about his character is the fact that his arc was never really brought to a satisfying conclusion and i wish we could have seen how things played out for him. i will also always be curious about the whole “he goes back to foxhound potentially knowing that bb was commanding the unit again” thing especially considering what was said in the after credits dialogue with ocelot
3) and speaking of bb i am obsessed with their relationship. love how it’s heavily implied on like 10 different occasions that kaz is bi and has romantic feelings for him (even if u ignore the whole date with kaz side mission in pw because it’s “not canon” or whatever) and i love how there’s like... there’s trust between them but there’s also very little trust there, too
kaz lied to him about his ties with cipher and i don’t think bb ever forgave him for that. and then bb went and did what he did back to him, after kaz had already lost everything and felt incredible amounts of guilt that was both deserved and undeserved. it’s kind of reminiscent of that thing that bb said at one point about war showing you who your real allies and enemies are, and how those lines aren’t always drawn by what you’re told or who you’re fighting against on the battlefield. like. you can find an enemy in your biggest ally and that’s exactly what ended up happening
and yeah the whole foxhound thing just. really gets me. i think a lot about how that had to go and the hurt he further dealt with during n313 and wrt zanzibar
4) also ok talking about foxhound-era kaz... i’m loathe to pick a favourite kaz our of the three major eras we see him in but old man kaz might just be my favourite and i really could not tell you why exactly. i guess it’s because it’s the only era where he gets to interact with snavid and i love them both so much so that’s a lot of fun
i think that their relationship is done really well but you’ve also kinda gotta read between the lines to get at the intricacies of it. like you’ve got kaz who it’s implied has only become david’s master to make him strong enough to help him get his revenge on big boss, but then by the time mgs1 hits david basically says he trusts him on the battlefield more than anyone. there had to be time between mg1 and mg2 or mg2 and mgs1 where that relationship changed from what it was to something more based on mutual respect, while also obviously still maintaining that master/student dynamic
i think about that mg2 carrie radio call sometimes (even though it was cut) where she asks snake to play with her “next time,” implying that there was a first time and that he and miller have hung out at least once with her around. like tbh i’m still not sure either if carrie is like a legit part of canon but she is to me & i do think kaz deserves to be a little domestic in the last years of his life. fishing. raising his daughter. having a wife. taking care of 50 wolf dogs.
and i think he looks very nice on top of all of that too. i’m literally So There’s This Senior Citizen right now but his hair is very very very good if nothing else. the ponytail really suits him and i like to think about all the different hairstyles he could wear. u think carrie ever braided it because i sure do :buttercat:
5) he is one of the smartest most articulate characters in the entire series. his college degree is definitely in business. he reads theory and knows the intricacies of world politics and law. but he is also a complete himbo who can barely rub two of his brain cells together
#asks#anon#cc#I HAD TO PUT THIS UNDER A#CUT BECAUSE IT WAS SO LONG LOL anyway thank you#for enabling me truly and i hope ur doing well today 💞
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