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#mum's back in the country so i get to see her tomorrow (plus my sister and the puppy! and my dad i guess)
camellia-thea · 27 days
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i am being Productive (has animated something for the first time in. years.)
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olivarryprompts · 3 years
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Fanfic Friday #6
Welcome to Fanfic Friday! Each Friday I will post a new fanfic here and on A03. Enjoy x
Read and save it on A03 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/32370130
{Peter Parker’s Field Trip to Stark Industries}
Ships: peppertony, wandanat, sambucky
Warnings: mild anxiety, swearing
Status: married or dating
Wc: 3,281
“-and so that wraps up this lesson. Your homework is to do this worksheet, please hand a sheet back to everyone. I have a quick announcement, and it is very exciting. Given that this is one of the most advanced classes we offer, the school has arranged for us to have a field trip!”
Peter refocused on the word field trip. He didn’t have a good track record for those.
“We will be going to Avenger’s Tower! This is a very exclusive opportunity and you all should be very excited-”
No, no, no, no, this couldn’t be happening to Peter. Not now. Oh god. He had a suspicion this was set up by his basically-father. He was going to kill Tony. His teacher went on to blabber about permission slips and NDAs.
“Class dismissed. Please hand your forms in tomorrow as the field trip is on Friday.”
FRIDAY? How could it be so soon. Peter wanted to die. He headed for the door, but was stopped in his tracks by Mr. Blaze calling his name.
“Yes?” he said, turning around. The class had mainly cleared out by now.
“Peter, you're a good kid, and I understand not being the most popular student in school, but we need to talk about the lie you made up about working at Stark Industries.”
“But the internship is re-”
“This field trip is a great opportunity, and I do not want your lies ruining it for yourself or your classmates. Please do not mention it whilst we are there, or there will be serious consequences.”
“It’s a real intern-”
“Please Peter. You should know better than this. See you tomorrow.”
He was tired and fed up of school when he headed into the hallways to see his best friend.
“Hey,” Ned said, meeting him in the hallway.
“Hey,” Peter replied weakly.
“What’s up? Something happened?”
“Nah, just that field trip.”
“Oh the one to Stark Tower! It’s going to be so fun!”
“Right..”
“You’re not excited? I know you work there and stuff, but still.”
“Hmn uh yeah. No it was more Mr. Blaze being a bitch,” he replied, half lying.
“Still thinks you're lying about the internship?”
“Unfortunately.”
“Wanna come over to mine? Build some lego?”
“Nah, got to be home. Too much work to catch up on with all the patrolling I’ve been doing.”
“Gotcha. Well, see you tomorrow.”
“Yeah, yeah see you.”
Peter walked to the carpark expecting to find Happy in his black SUV. He was, instead, met by Black Widow.
“Nat?”
“Hey spider boy.”
“What are you doing here?”
“Figured I’d pick ya up and bring you home. Had a second free.”
He jumped into the passenger seat of the jet black convertible.
“How was school паук?”
“Не очень хорошо,” he said easily slipping into Russian. (Not very good)
“Зачем? что-то случилось? (Why? Did something happen?”)
“Да. У нас есть производственная практика в Stark Industries. Что было бы не так уж и плохо, но мой глупый учитель не думает, что я действительно проходил там стажировку, поэтому он отругал меня. Плюс мое паучье чутье сегодня сильно пошло на убыль.” (Yes. We have a field trip to Stark Industries. Which wouldn't be so bad, but my stupid teacher doesn't think I really have an internship there, so he told me off. Plus my spider sense were going off so much today.)
“бедный ребенок. Я могу чем-нибудь помочь?” (Poor kid. Anything I can do to help?)
“Убить Tony за это? (Kill Tony for setting this up?”)
“Нет, детка. Сожалею." (No can do kiddo. Sorry.)
“Разве ты не можешь рассказать другим Мстителям? Особенно папа.” (Can you not tell the other Avengers? ‘Specially Dad.)
“Я не обещаю.” (I won’t, promise.)
"Спасибо.” (Thanks.)
They’d arrived at the tower. There was more to it than he was telling. Ever since he’d moved into the tower, he’d been his safe space. It was his and his families. And he knew it was supid because so many people used it, but still. It felt awful for people from his school to come there. Peter pulled his security card out of his bag, scanning it.
“Peter Parker-Stark, clearance level Alpha 5, all access. Hi baby boss,” Friday, the building's AI called out, “Shall I tell Mr. Stark you’re home?”
“Yeah sure. I’m going straight to my lab, though.”
“Okay sir. Morgan would also like to inform you that she is looking for you.”
“Send her down to the lab.”
“As you wish.”
He hopped in the lift and allowed Friday to take him to floor 89. It was his personal lab. Oren, he’d reprogram Karen, allowed him entry through the glass door.
“Hello Peter, welcome back. What would you like to work on?”
“I’m going to do some work on my web shooters. Play my “workin after school” playlist on, please.”
“Yes, sir.”
He worked peacefully on his shooters design and mechanics for about 30 minutes before Oren alerted him that Morgan was coming up.
“Morgan Stark is requesting entry.”
“Granted.”
The door opened and revealed his basically little sister.
“Hey Mo,” he said, picking up the little girl, “Who let you roam around all on your own?”
“Mummy sent me up,” she smiled.
Peter nodded.
“What are you working on Petey.”
“I’ll show you,” he said, placing Morgan on his work table. He’d quickly made sure there was nothing that could hurt her.
“Web shooters?” she guessed.
“Yep. See I wanted to make them even more efficient so I changed the gears and trigger mechanism.”
She nodded knowingly. She was very smart for her age.
“Nice! Can we build our robot?”
“Sure thing. Oren, pull up the files for Petey-Pie and Morgana’s Robot.” He’d let Morgan handle the name for their creation.
Peter went and grabbed the box that had all their pieces in it. Being careful around the young girl, they continued to work on building the robot, Peter teaching her little things on the way.
So he had a normal evening. Did some fun work, some homework, ate dinner with the lunatics called the avengers, and went to bed.
“If it isn’t my two favorite small children!” Tony said, entering his lab.
“Daddy!” Morgan said, running into her father’s arms.
“Oren, I thought I told you to lock Dad out.”
“Unfortunately your father runs the building, so I could not follow your wanted protocol.”
“Love you too kid.”
“You set up the field trip.”
“Field trip?”
“Yeah. My school’s coming here on Friday!” Peter said, looking up from his work.
“Really? Nope wasn’t me. It was likely someone from PR, kiddo. You do go to one of the best STEM schools in the country.”
Tony had a point.
“Right...sorry.”
“It’s good, kid. What’s got you so wound up about it?”
“Daddy, I’m going to Mummy.”
“Okay kiddo, Friday take little Potts to bigger Potts,” he said with a smile.
“Yes sir.”
Once Morgan left, Tony asked again, “So wanna talk about it?”
“Just, just this is home. My home. And I know that’s stupid because it’s a fuckin 100 floor tower, but I know it. I know it so well, and I just don’t really want kids from my school here. I know I can’t gatekeep a building bu-”
“Hey, hey, it’s not stupid. It makes sense. This place is home and you don’t want them messing with any part of it. I bet most kids in your class wouldn’t love it if people came into their home for a field trip.”
“Yeah. And i-its my safeplace. From everything.” Everything being all the people he lost. His parents and uncle and aunt.
“I get it. Want me to have Pep cancel the trip?”
“N-no, no. All the kids in my class were so excited.”
“Always so selfless,” Tony smiled, “When is it again?”
“Friday.”
“Kiddo, I promise it’ll be fine. If anything, anything happens just get Fri to call me or Pep. Most of the avengers will be around too so you can call ‘em too.”
“Yeah. Thanks. They’ll just try to embarrass me, though,” Peter laughed.
“They will. Do I need to sign something?”
“I’m just going to have Mum do it because her signature is less recognizable.”
“Yeah, okay. Your teachers still don’t believe you?”
“How did you know th-”
“Come on kid, I’m Tony Stark.”
Peter smiled, “Fair enough. Yeah they don’t. I mean they will after the trip.”
“Yeah, that’s the bright side.”
“Yeah.”
“Okay, I’ll leave you to it then. Don’t stay in here too late.”
The night before the field trip he was so nervous. He ended up eating dinner in his lab. Pepper complained but Tony just told her he’d had a long day and deserved a break.
He knew he should have gone to bed but as each hour passed, he got more and more anxious about the trip. He needed something to take his mind off it, so he just kept working and working. Suddenly it was seven in the morning and he needed a shower. Finishing his eighth coffee of the eve, he headed to the 91st floor where he stayed. Hoping that neither of his parents would notice his all nighter he crept into his room.
After getting ready for school, he made his way back out of his room.
“Morning,” Pepper greeted him, “How was last night?” She wore a knowing smile as she continued to tap on her computer, presumably doing work.
“Fine,” he smiled, “Don’t tell dad.”
“I won’t. You're turning into him, though.”
“What else was expected?”
Pepper just smiled, “Sam and Bucky had loads of pastry delivered to the main kitchen if you wanna pop in there.”
“Yeah, sounds good. Thanks.”
“By sweetie, have a good day at school.”
“Thanks. Love you.”
“Love you too, hun.”
Peter jumped in the lift taking him up two floores to the Avengers hang out space.
“Spiderling!” Sam and Bucky greeted
“Old Man, bird boy,” he smirked.
“You look like shit, паук,” Nat said from the sofa.
“Thanks,” he said, putting a few of the delicious looking treats onto his plate. He also grabbed himself another cup of coffee. He plops himself down next to Nat on the sofa.
“Did you not sleep again? You look like hell.” Tony said, entering the kitchen to get himself another cup of coffee.
“Right back at you dad.”
“Fair.”
Steve entered, coming back from his run.
“Hey,” he said, addressing the room, “God kid, you look like yo-”
“OKAY NEXT PERSON TO TELL ME I LOOK SHIT IS GETTING IT!”
“Oh sorry,” Steve said, rolling his eyes. Clint came in with Pietro at his side, “What’s this about Peter looking shit?”
“I hate you all,” he said, finishing his last bite. He laid down on the sofa.
“Oh ah kid, something I needed to tell you. Right, you can stay here. No need to go to school and back. Pepper wrote a note saying you’d meet at the school because you had a doctor's appointment or some shit.”
“Why is spider boy here?” Sam asked.
“School field trip.”
“Only you Parker,” the White Wolf laughed.
“No embarrassing me, please,” he begged.
“Hell no, this is a great opportunity,” Sam said, looking over to bucky.
“I won’t,” Nat said with her hands up.
“I’m in, team embarrass Peter,” Clint said, high fiving Bucky and Sam. At that moment, Wanda walked in heading straight for her girlfriend’s arms. Nat happily let her fall into her lap.”
“What’s wrong with you?” Nat asked with some level of concern.
“Everything,” Wanda said.
“Drama queen,” Pietro scoffed. Peter closed his eyes and let the conversation happen around him. At some point, Tony had left. Clint had gone off to train with the Dumb and Dumber, and Steve claimed he had a mission brief.
Friday’s voice startled him, “Peter, I recommend you head downstairs as your class is arriving in 5.”
“Five what?” Peter questioned.
“Four,” The AI continued.
“A LITTLE MORE WARNING WOULD BE NICE!”
Peter grabbed his shit and jumped into the private elevator as fast as he could. Luckily, he was in the lobby mere moments before the class entered. He pretended just to be standing around.
“Peter,” Mr. Blaze called, “Please come and join the class.”
Peter nodded, spotting his best friend amongst the crowd.
“Hey,” Ned greeted.
“‘Sup.”
“Good morning everyone,” said the tour guild, “My name is Tamiko Hiroki and I will be taking you on your tour today. To start, I will be giving you all badges. When I call your name please step up and collect it.”
She made her way through the basket and by the time she was done only one student had not received a badge.
“Hey, Peter didn’t get a badge,” Cindy Moon, a kind girl in his physics class, called.
“Apologies, there doesn’t seem to be one in here for a Peter.”
“Uh I-i, I have m-my own. Thanks Tamiko.”
“Oh okay, cool. Please follow me to security.” The class seemed shocked. Was the kid telling the truth about his internship?
“So, there are many different levels of pass here. Guests get Beta levels 1-5 depending on what they are doing. Then there’s Omega’s who are interns and such. Next is the scientist and important employees with Zeta. Finally there’s Alpha for major important roles such as department heads. The top level, Alpha 5, contains the most important people like the Avengers who live in the tower and CEO Pepper Pots.
“Tamiko Hiro, Clearance level Beta 5.”
“Don’t worry everyone, that's Friday, the AI who runs the building. Just keep passing through.”
“Philip Maiko, Clearance level Beta 1.”
“Michelle Jones, Clearance level Beta 1.”
Peter headed towards the back, allowing all the students to go in front of him. He prayed they didn’t hear his security protocol. The rest passed through with Beta 1. Then, Peter came up.
“Peter Parker-Stark, clearance level Alpha 5, all access. Hi baby boss,” Friday, the building's AI called out, “Shall I tell Mr. Stark you’re home early?”
“I’m on a field trip, Fri. No need to tell D-Mr. Stark. Thanks.”
The class, once again, looked shocked.
“Why does Penis Parker have all access?” Flash called to Tamiko.
“I do not believe I have clearance to disclose that information, but Peter here may answer,” Tamiko said, glaring at Flash.
“I mean I’ve said it before. I am a personal intern of-”
“PETEY!” Bucky yelled, giving him a hug from behind.
Deflated, he responded, “Hey Buck.”
“Is that all I get?
The two settled on one of the many sofas in the lab. Pete’s head in Tony’s lab.
“Sorry about that, Pepper explicitly told all tours to stay off this level, but it seems as though her assistant made an exception because she thought it was okay as you were on the tour. Pepper fired her.”
Only his mum, “She didn’t have to do that.”
“She was furious.”
“Oh I’m sure.”
“I know this is your safe space, so-”
“It’s okay. No one came in.”
“Yeah.”
“You feeling any better?”
“Just tired. Thanks.”
“Always kiddo. You wanna go upstairs? Take a nap?”
“Sure.”
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doof-doofblog · 4 years
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"He Didn't Do Anything!"
Monday 13th April 2020
Good evening folks! How has your week been? Hope everyone is keeping safe and trying to keep to the rules as much as possible, I know it's been difficult, I myself have been struggling being away from my loved ones. This horrible situation that's happening with the country now, there has to be an end to it, right? Hopefully the end will come soon if we all keep doing what we're doing! I apologise that this post is late, I was up early for work this morning and decided to have an early night last night, I only caught up on last night's episode now ... I'll do another post tomorrow for tonight's episode! I'm sure you've been missing your daily dose of EastEnders? I sure am! We're back with a new week, so lets jump right into it!
There's quite a fair bit to cram into this post ... let's start with Kush and Tommy. We knew there was going to be an upcoming storyline to do with Tommy while his Mum, Kat, is away. Kush is looking after the boys while Kat is aware dealing with some family business, we assume. So it looks as if Tommy isn't doing too well at school, his report isn't the best it could be. Something is obviously affecting the poor boy. When Kush caught him on the staircase and he said "I hate my life!" ... I just felt like saying "Awww poor Tommy!" ... but honestly, no little boy should have to feel that they hate their life. It's true the poor boy has had it hard, both his Mum and Dad are off the scene. Michael Moon was his father and he was murdered. Alfie, who brought him up, is now off the scene and now his Mum has disappeared. The poor boy must feel like he's been left abandoned. Okay, he still has his brother's and step-sister Cherry, but it's not really the same is it? No wonder his school work isn't doing well. But I did have a theory, I have a feeling that that poor kid is being bullied. What else could the story-line be? A young child Tommy's age and being bulled, it can be a huge story-line ... bullying takes place every day, as Tommy said himself, school is the same every day! How will Kush be able to support the young child? Surely he'll have to inform Jean and Mo, if Tommy doesn't want his Mum to know, Kush is going to have to get other members of the family involved so they'll be able to support the young boy. Only thing is, is this story going to continue for when Kat returns? Will this story-line bring back Kat, perhaps along with Stacey? I'm looking forward to seeing what it could be that is upsetting Tommy, plus i'm looking forward to seeing how Kush will cope with the information.
Can we just talk about how cute Jean is? Honestly, she one of my favourite characters, always has been! Gillian Wright is just fantastic at her portrayal as Jean Slater. It's so lovely to see Jean being all smiley and enjoying the fact she has beaten cancer and that her hair is now growing back! It's fantastic she's having the confidence to take it all in and walk proudly in her stride as her hair grows back! The little funeral wig party she had with Shirley and Mo was hilarious! I love the friendship between Shirley and Jean, from the very beginning, it's been a special one! Shirley has always been there for Jean whenever she has needed her, it's a friendship I love seeing on-screen! Does anyone else agree? And yea ... Shirley with long hair! Haha! Not sure what you guys think, but she should stick with the hair style she's got right now?!
Okay does anyone notice a bit if flirtation happening between Chantelle and Kheerat?! Do they have a history, or was it Jags she had a bit of history with?! Did she mention she knew Kheerat at college? But there have a few times there have been hints of flirtation between the two, don't you think? Chantelle is now working for the Panesar's, will things lead to another? Considering how Gray has been treating his wife like a punching bag the past few months, is Kheerat going to be the one that Chantelle finally tells? Is he the one who's going to save her from Gray? I feel there's a lot more still to come from these two, whether it be in a more romantic involvement or whether it's just purely friendship. What do you guys think? Do you agree that there may be something between them? Leave me a comment or message me, I'd love to hear your thoughts!  
I just want to mention the scenes we saw of Phil and Callum, wasn't it just amazing to see Phil accept Callum? How he said that Callum was right for Ben, it's something that really made my heart soar. It's amazing the long road Phil has taken over the years to accept his son's sexuality. But to even praise his son's boyfriend and to give him his blessing and making sure what he said wasn't homophobic, it speaks volumes for Phil's character! He's always been known as the hard man, but he has soft spot and his family means everything to him, regardless of their sexuality. But part of me, is thinking, how is Ben going to react knowing Callum has spoken to his Dad? When Phil realised that Ben's hearing may never come back and that it may be the new norm for Ben, it's something that's going to take its toll for everyone involved, especially Ben! But the scenes between Steve McFadden and Tony Clay were beautiful! I'm looking forward to seeing these two join forces to help Ben in his time of trauma.  
Ooooh, I didn't like the look of that Michaela when she first arrived as was watching Whitney from a distance! I knew she was going to try to manipulate her into telling her what happened to Leo. Thank God for Ruby and Gray, otherwise god knows what might've happened between Whitney and Michaela. Is what Whitney told Michaela going to be brought up against her in court? Might it have been something she shouldn't have done as it may make her trail worse. Could she be sent down for murder, will Michaela twist things and make Whitney be shown as a murder, when really it was all in self defence?! Who else is looking forward to seeing Whitney's story-line progress? Let's hope Gray will be able to help Whitney as the court will find her Not Guilty of murder!
Okay, so is Vinny trying to prove himself as a DJ to get a job at Ruby's? Well it seemed to work! However, we all knew his party was going to cause trouble ... a party never really ends well on EastEnders does it?! Lets be honest?! I found it good in the sense that it gave him a chance to prove himself and do something he enjoys, not having to work for his Mum ... who he really isn't happy with at the moment, which you can understand. Does anyone else think Vinny has a thing for Dotty? I do!! Dotty may be getting on with her own thing with Bobby and Peter, but little to her knowledge, from the sidelines, I believe Vinny will be watching and longing to be with her! That's what i'm guessing anyway! So we have to focus on a few couples who were at Vinny's party, firstly Iqra and Ash. I've heard rumours that apparently Ash is going to start showing a darker side to her character? Could that mean that she starts being controlling over Iqra? Could she start being abusive? Who knows? Ash didn't want to go Vinny's party to begin with, but Iqra kinda begged her to ... Ash kept bad-mouthing her Mum much to Iqra's disappointment, but she didn't seem to care. I feel there could be something dark about to happen within their relationship, whether Ash turns abusive or manipulative towards Iqra, remains to be seen.
The second couple who attended Vinny's party, even though they arrived late, were Keegan and Tiffany. Before we focus on how the episode ended, Tiffany and Keegan were again the main focus of the episode I felt. Keegan feeling down about not being able to get a loan, and Tiffany clearly showing signs of frustration, trying her best to support her husband but not really getting any support back in return. I feel for Tiffany at the moment, she's trying her best to support her husband but every time something happens, Keegan goes all cold with her and says she'll never understand, which is a bit unfair! However, tonight, they had a little bit of good news, even though it was short lived ... Keegan got his loan from Kheerat, much to Tiffany's help after speaking with Chantelle. But that soon rose Keegan's spirits and the young couple were enjoying life and looking towards a brighter future with Keegan's growing business, only for it all to be taken away again after Keegan was arrested for something he didn't do! During Vinny's party, the police were called and the mob that crowded the police cars, someone body threw a brick at their windscreen, which saw Keegan get the blame! Fans will know that Keegan hasn't had much luck when it comes with the police, for some reason, he seems to get confronted and searched and treated poorly by the cops, for which Keegan feels is because of his skin colour. Is this going to be something that pushes Keegan to the edge and will he decide to stand up for what he believes in? Will he be able to fight for his rights? I'm intrigued to what is going to happen with Keegan's story, is it going to be a continues circle of him being in the wrong place at the wrong time and being confronted by police, or will it eventually lead to him taking action after how he's treated?! What do you guys think of Keegan's story? How do you think it will conclude? I'm really looking forward to hearing all of your theories and thoughts, please feel free to ask me any questions you may like, I'd love to answer them!
Thank you guys for taking your time to read. I apologise once again for it being late, I'm looking forward to writing about tonight's episode, tomorrow! Enjoy the rest of your evening and I'll be back tomorrow! Look after yourself everyone, keep safe and we will get through this together! xXx
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thebestofallworlds · 5 years
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Detention
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Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: George Weasley x reader
Y/N= your name
Y/H= your house
F/F= favourite flower
Y/P= Your patronus
I am a part of Dumbledore’s Army. I believe Harry. You-Know-Who was back and I wanted to know how to fight if something were to go down. Plus that Umbridge bitch wasn’t teaching us anything. I was about to go into my N.E.W.Ts and wasn’t learning anything about the dark arts or how to protect myself. So I turned to Harry. 
When I over heard Hermione saying that there was going to be a secret meeting, I was all for it. If Hermione is saying that stuff, it’s got to be serious. So I signed up, thought it’d be fun, learn a few defensive spells here and there. Plus there was a certain ginger twin that I had a slight crush on, that I knew would sign up. It’s against the rules, so of course him and his brother would sign up.
So it’s now after the Christmas holidays. I decided to stay at the castle because my parents were going out of the country and I didn’t want to spend Christmas by myself in a lonely and quiet house. It was nice, I just spent a lot of time in the common room of Y/H reading books. It was nice to have a common room all to myself, just watching the snow fall outside of the castle, drinking hot chocolate by the warm fire. 
Christmas Da was really nice as well. Mum and Dad sent me some really nice presents. But there was a present from a secret admirer which confused me. It was a beautiful silver necklace with a pendant of F/F on it. I mean, I’d like to know who sent it but that will just be a question for another day.
Anyway, as I said it was now after Christmas and Hogwarts was alive again with students rushing through the corridors trying to make it to their classes on time. I just groan, I wish that I didn’t have to go to class, with Umbridge on her rampage the only thing I looked forward to now was Dumbledore’s Army meeting, which we have our first one later tonight. 
It’s also getting super risky. She’s like hired Draco Malfoy and his followers to be in her Inquisitorial Squad. This mainly meant that they now had permission to follow us everyone which was becoming really annoying. And she continues to make educational decrees which is ruining my year at Hogwarts. I hate her, and I know I’m not the only one.
I somehow make it through the day of classes. McGonagall seemed more on edge than usual, and Snape was just a dick in Potions. I make it back to my common room and go up to my dorm room to just sit and read and relax before going to the DA meeting. I’m excited to see everyone because it’s been a while since everyone seemed to leave Hogwarts for Christmas. The only two people I saw today were the Weasley twins, Fred and George, because we have some of the same classes together. 
As I make my way over to my bed I see a bouquet of my F/F lying on my pillow and in front of it a little note. Not gonna lie, it’s kind of getting creepy because I don’t know who’s giving me these gifts. It’s a nice gesture but if I just knew who it was it wouldn’t be so creepy. I touch the necklace that’s around my neck, I’ve been wearing it since Christmas and I would really like to know who gave it to me. After the initial shock I found a vase in one of the cupboards, filled it with waters and put the flowers in the vase, on my bed side table. 
Then I read the note.
Can’t wait to see you tonight at the meetings. I have to talk to you. Hope you enjoy the flowers
G xx
G? who the hell is G. I just let this thought go to the back of my head as I put the note in one of my pockets. I grab my book which is now next the vase of flowers and begin to read to pass the time before the DA meeting
After reading for a while I realise that it’s time for our DA meeting, which I’m super excited for. I feel as though I’ve actually made some really good friends during these meetings and we’re all learning the same things and our skills are getting better together. It’s just really nice for all of us to feel the same level of accomplishment as everyone else.
I find Luna at the end of the corridor and give her a small nod, as if questioning if she was ready and if there was anyone there watching us. She just motioned me to come closer to her, so I make my way quietly over to her and cautiously look around. When we’re both certain that no one is watching we run to the Room of Requirements, where our meetings are being held. Once in the room I look around to see everyone’s faces. The room is full of chatter as everyone is catching up on their Christmas Holidays as I just smile looking around the room. 
I hear my name being called and I turn around and see Hermione waving me over. I make my way across the room and give her a big hug. She’s like my little sister and I’ve really missed her over the holidays.
“That’s such a pretty necklace Y/N, did your mum and dad get it for you for Christmas?” Hermione asks as she observes my necklace.
“No, I don’t know who got it for me, but it’s just beautiful. I really wish I knew who did get it for me. I’d like to thank them for the gift.” I say. Hermione just nods and she goes on to tell me how her Christmas was. Out of the corner of my eye I see George Weasley, whose a few feet to the right of me talking with Fred and Neville, looking at me with a cute little boyish smile. It makes my heart flutter and I can feel my cheeks slowly burning up. I shift my attention back to Hermione before Harry calls for our attention, about to start the meeting. 
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Patronuses. Today Harry is teaching us how to produce a patronus. Everyone is getting there, but I’m only getting little wisps of white coming out of my wand.
“Keep trying Y/N, you’ve almost got it. Think of a happier memory” Harry says walking past me checking on everyone else. I just huff and nod my head. It’s getting a little frustrating that I can’t produce a proper patronus. I try again, thinking of a specific Christmas with my parents when I opened a present that I had been asking for forever. Again all I got was little wisps. I feel someone brush my shoulder and I look up to George Weasley. He grabs my wand and holds it up a little higher.
“Come on Y/N, I know you can do it,” He says and I think again to another time. This time it’s when I got my Hogwarts letter. A stronger wisp came out of my wand but still not a proper patronus. I just huff and look down, feeling really angry with myself that I can’t do it.
George just chuckles and then leans down and whispers in my ear, “ya know, you could always think of me. By the way, that’s a beautiful necklace, the person that got it for you must be a tall ginger with a great interest in you,” and with that he walks away giving me a wink in the process. I just stand there stunned. So I do exactly what he says. I think of all the times we’ve been together, watching him from a far as he plays pranks on everyone, us during the meetings, me using stupefy during one of our duels making me the winning.
“Expecto Patronum” and suddenly there’s a glow of blue and Y/P comes out of your wand and makes its way around the room with everyone else’s patronus. I just stare wide eyed and look at George and I think he understands because he gives me a small smile, wink and a nod. 
Suddenly the room begins to shake, and stupid Umbridge explodes it open. Long story short, bloody Cho Chang ratted us out and now we all have detention because according to the stupid educational decrees she forbade the existence of any student organisation not approved by the High Inquisitor. 
A few days later and I was fed up with stupid detention. My hand burned. “I must not break rules” was scared into the back of my hand and I hate it. After this last session I hurried out of the great hall and ran to the Astronomy tower where I know no one will be because they’re too scared of being caught. Once I’ve reach there I just break down and cry. It’s been so hard these past few days. Dumbledore is gone, Umbridge is now headmistress and is going out of her way to make all of our lives hell. 
I’m so focused in my own thoughts that I don’t even hear foot steps making their way towards me. It’s only when I feel something brush against my shoulders that I jump. I look up and see George Weasley, a sad smile on his face looking at me. I try to wipe my eyes but every-time I do they just seem to get even wetter. George gets down to my level and wraps his arms around and I just cry into his shirt as he rubs my back and whispers soothing words into my ear until I calm down. He then grabs my scared hand and kisses it sweetly.
“The pain stops after a while, I’ve had so many detentions with that toad that mine don’t even hurt any more,” he says and I let out a teary laugh. He reaches up and wipes the last remaining tears that were falling down my cheeks.
“You sent me the necklace and the flowers didn’t you?” I ask and he just chuckles and nods his head.
“Sure did, I heard you one day telling Luna about your favourite flower, and I had developed quite the crush on you a few years ago but wasn’t quite sure on how to tell you. And Fred and Lee are exactly helpful, and I didn’t want to ask mum. So I bought the necklace for you for Christmas, which looks gorgeous on you by the way, and I was planning to tell you everything the other day, but Umbridge just had to ruin everything. What I guess I’m trying to say is that I really like you Y/N, like really, really like you. You don’t have to feel the same way but I just wanted to tell you before anything happened,” I just smile and look straight at him, wrap my hands around his neck and put my lips on his lips. His are soft and move perfectly with mine. I’m the first to break the kiss and I gasp for air. Then we both laugh, but like a proper laugh, one that hasn’t been heard since Umbridge started working here at Hogwarts and the fear of You-Know-Who’s rise to power began. 
“Now Y/N, would you like to go on a date with me, tomorrow, the Three Broomsticks?” George asks me, looking hopeful.
“On one condition,”
“Which is?”
“That I’m not a test subject for you and your brother’s Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes products,”
“Done.”
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your-high-lady · 5 years
Text
Realisation
Summary: This story is about Feyre. She has a couple of small dreams she wants to achieve but turns out it isn't as easy as she imagined it would. Trust me, the story is better than the summary. Modern AU. Feysand.
Chapter 1  Chapter 2   Chapter 3   Chapter 4  
Chapter 5: Farewell
Disclaimer: As always, I do not own the characters or any of this, except for the plot. My story wouldn't even be on the internet if the legendary Sarah J Mass, hadn't written the ACOTAR books first. She truly is so effing amazing, and I feel so happy thinking about that time when I noticed ACOTAR on my local library's shelf and decided to give the book a try.
But anyways. Enough of that. On to the story.
"Cheers!" I clinked my glass against Mor's, Dad's, Nesta's and Elain's. Dad had taken a week off from his travelling, and Nesta and Elain had come down from Dunedin to celebrate mine and Mor's graduation and have "one last dinner before you two grow up".
We would be leaving for Stanford tomorrow morning. The semester would be starting on Monday, and we'd be landing on Saturday so that gave us two days to get settled in. I know it wasn't a lot of time but our apartment had already been furnished and all, so we'd only need to unpack and buy some groceries for the week. The rest could be done on the weekends after the semester started.
Though it was going to be a late night, I was glad that we were here. Sitting together as a family—because Mor was practically family, even though we didn't share blood—one last time before we went off to college.
College.
I couldn't be more excited. But I was nervous, too. Of course, I was. Moving to a whole new country, with only your friend and her family—they lived near Stanford which was one of the main reasons Dad was letting me go, despite the fact that Mor hated them and they hated her because of some ancient family feud. Although she did have a cousin there, who she was on good terms with. I think his name was Reed or something, maybe Rice—as familiar faces? Anyone would be nervous. But I was ready. I knew it was going to be hard. I knew there would be bad days and good days. I knew there would be days where I wished that I'd just stayed in New Zealand. But that was why I was going. For the challenge, for the thrill of it. Of living on my own terms. It irked me a little that I would need a bit of help from the people around me and Mor will be living with me, but it wasn't that bad. Mor knew my dreams of living alone in my own house or apartment, and she was okay with it. Supportive, even. But that was my goal. And then after that maybe I could consider… no, I wouldn't even consider dating. After what I'd been through, I was in no rush at all. Succeeding was my new goal.
I hadn't told Dad about the incident. I might've told Mum but she had died when I was eight, because of some sickness. I often missed her, but Dad, Nesta and Elain had always made me feel better with stories about her, whenever I felt that way.
I didn't tell Elain because she was just so nice and caring: it felt wrong to bring something as bad as rape into her life. She was too pure for that. About Nesta, though. I didn't tell her for the absolute opposite reason. She would've blown apart the world to find Dagdan and Tamlin if I told her about it.
Mor didn't agree with my decision. She believed that I should at least tell Nesta about it. She was worried about my mental health and believed telling a real family member would help. But I was okay. I'd accepted what had happened and why. I knew it was my fault and had learnt to live with it. I was fine. I was okay.
I was not okay.
"Bye Daddy. Bye Nesta, Elain." I hugged each of them separately. Mor had gone to the bathroom giving us the perfect opportunity to have a private farewell. "I'll miss you guys."
"Make sure you call every day." I smiled at Nesta before saying I'll call her every hour. She laughed and that just made my day. Mor came back, then, so I gave each of them another giant, tight hug before going through the doors with Mor, waving behind me, and out of their sight.
We were on our own now.
After sixteen hours of sitting in the most uncomfortable position ever, the plane finally landed. We went through security and all that crap. Mor hadn't bothered asking her parents to pick us up, and her cousin was busy, leaving us to take the taxi.
The apartment—which Dad would be paying the rent for until Mor and I got our own jobs and were able to afford it for ourselves—that Dad had bought for us was only five minutes away from the campus so we would easily be able to just walk over, though Dad had given me enough money to get a decent car, so that we could drive to the grocery store and places like that.
When I opened the door to our medium-sized new home, I was quite surprised to find a decent amount of furniture already laid out, though I shouldn't have been. Dad would totally do something like this.
The kitchen, mostly white with brown dotted here and there, was to the right, with a small lounge area in front of it. A telly had been placed at the back tucked into a corner so that Mor or I could watch whatever was on while working on the bench in the kitchen. A couple of brown and black sofas had been placed, making a half square, around a centrepiece table. It was also brown, the wood light mahogany, with glass in the middle of it, placed over a white furry rug. Mor instantly threw down her bags and ran towards it, running her fingers through the soft material. She said, pushing her lower lip out, "It's so soft, Feyre. It's like heaven in the clouds and I could fall asleep in one of them," then promptly but carefully pushed the table away and started making angels in the carpet. I shook my head at her, smiling a little, before heading towards the small corridor on the left of the front room. There were two doors in total, leading into the bedrooms—one for each of us—on either side of the hall plus another small cupboard, with built-in shelves. Entering the first room, I plopped my heavy bags onto the brown-carpeted floor and plain bed, which had just a mattress on it, before turning a full circle as I examined the room. It wasn't big by any means, but I quite liked it. The walls were bare with white paint. Plenty of room for me to paint the walls whatever I wanted. The cupboard also wasn't very spacious, though the small sliding door also served as a mirror so that was a bonus. Already imagining the different things I could paint on the walls, I went out and into what would become Mor's bedroom. It was only slightly bigger, the bed set in a different position, but I knew once we were settled in, our bedrooms would become very, very different.
The next day, I was cooking lunch when Mor suggested we go shopping. I turned to look at her. She was sitting cross-legged on the black bench, beside me, munching on an apple. "And why, may I ask, do you want to go shopping?" I asked raising my eyebrows, as I sprinkled in pinches of herbs and spices I knew Mor liked. As I skimmed through the recipe I was following—and modifying at the same time—Mor answered. "Well school starts tomorrow so I want to do something fun, and you know how much I absolutely adore shopping. And anyway, neither of us bought lots of luggage and we don't have enough clothes to survive the rest of winter." She was right of course. We hadn't brought a lot with us, definitely not enough to last us the winter. Sighing, I nodded. She squealed before giving me a tight but quick hug from behind and running off to get dressed. I smiled at her back. Sometimes it felt like Mor was my child, with me always taking care of her. I didn't mind though. I was just glad the incident with Tamlin and Dagdan hadn't affected her as badly as it had me. It would've been very saddening to me to see that light vanish from her eyes.
Mor took the clothes out of their bags, and put the t-shirt against my shoulders, "Oh, Feyre, this is going to look wonderful on you," She squealed. I look down at the t-shirt. It had a floral design, most of the flowers a pastel pink or blue, with frilly sleeves that came down to my elbows and clung to my waist accentuating my non-existent curves and breasts. It wasn't anything special but Mor had been so insistent that I get this, because apparently "the male population in school will be left stunned when they see you in this." I'd just rolled my eyes when she said that and moved to put the shirt back in its spot, but Mor wasn't having it. She'd been holding an iced drink in her hand—it was nearly finished but there was enough colour in it that if she dropped on the shirt, it would be stained. And that is exactly what she threatened to do if I didn't buy the shirt. Which is why I now owned that shirt. I sighed at the sweet memory as Mor carried on going through the different shopping bags we'd collected over the day. It was then that I noticed a couple across the street, from where we were waiting for the bus. They were kissing, sweetly. I don't why, but looking at them triggered lots of other memories. Memories of Tamlin and I.
It had been perfect in the begging. It had been everything I'd ever wanted for myself. He was caring and nice and handsome and protective. But that was the problem. He was too good. So good that I failed to notice all the bad things about him. And then when I finally noticed, it was too late. I sometimes hated myself for that. I'd grown up hearing warnings from my parents and older sisters about the strange men in our world who had no moral sense. They told me that they were people like Tamlin and Dagdan out there and had told me to keep myself safe. And every time I'd just brushed them off, absolutely sure that I would know what to do if and when I met someone like that. But of course, I hadn't actually really thought about it. I hadn't really expected to actually meet someone like that. I wish I had. I wish I'd listened to my parents and sisters. I wish I hadn't been so blinded by love that I couldn't even see my own doom approaching me with each moment I spent in Tamlin's company.
'Feyre!" I blinked, and then blinked again to clear the blurriness in my eyes, to find Mor standing over me, her hands tightly gripping my shoulders. "What's wrong? Are you thinking about him?" She asked, spitting out the last word. I just shook my head, bring my hand up to wipe the tears that had fallen down, while I thought about all the mistakes I'd made in the last year. Thankfully the bus arrived then, and I gently pushed Mor away, letting her know that I didn't want to talk about it.
AN: Please review. I'll try to get the next chapter out soon. Thank you for reading.
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girl-iguess · 6 years
Text
Oh, Gemma
“Hi, baby.”
Tension evaporated off Harry’s body, causing it to instantly relax at the sound of his girlfriend’s voice. He smiled into the phone while pulling the duvet on his bed closer to his body.
“Can’t sleep?” Kennedy asked.
“It’s because you’re not here with me,” Harry spoke, voice deep and muffled.
For the past year, falling asleep became more and more difficult for Harry. Going to sleep alone has never been appealing to him, but being in a committed long distance relationship heightened the feeling. It wasn’t so bad in the beginning. But after 3 years and consistent talks about marriage and living together, all Harry wanted to do was hold her in his arms.
Desperate, Harry decided to call Kennedy. The sound of her voice was enough for sleep to catch up and invade his body. It doesn’t compare to the feeling of her body pressed against his, the touch of her soft skin on his chest and arm, the scent of mango butter she loved to lather her body with after her night shower. But it was enough to soothe his cravings.
Kennedy giggled and Harry swore his heart leaped out of his chest. He was so in love with her.
“You can’t wait until I fly out there next week?” She teased.
The smoothness of her voice wrapped around his body like a snuggled newborn. He felt the warmth through his bones. Harry closed his eyes to intensify his sense of hearing.
“Always want you with me, love. You make me so happy.”
Kennedy couldn’t stop the smile on her face from forming as she bit her lower lip. Harry never shy away from displays of affection, whether it was physically or verbally. It created a field of butterflies in her stomach every time.
“And sleepy, apparently.” She joked.
Harry laughed, “In a good way, baby.”
Kennedy tilted her head to the side as she shyly smiled again. Those damn butterflies. “Well, I have a surprise for you. Come outside.”
Eyebrows furrowed in confusion as Harry registered what she said in his head. “Huh?”
She chuckled, “Come outside!”
He shot up in his bed. Switching his phone from one ear to the other, he ran his hand through his hair. “Baby, are you serious?”
“Yes, honey! Hurry, it’s dark out here.”
Almost tripping on the bed sheets, Harry rushed downstairs to the front door. He opened the door and found Kennedy standing there, arms wide accompanying a smile that was even wider.
He engulfed her into a hug so tight she thought her spine snapped in half, but she didn’t mind at all. His arms were where she felt the most comfortable and protected. She quickly wrapped her arms around his neck as she laughed, feeling overjoyed.
Harry released her and took a step back. She was really standing in front of him. “Surprise!” She exclaimed.
She giggled when he almost leaped to hug her again. Swaying side to side, Harry kissed her cheek before kissing her lips.
“I missed you so much.”
Kennedy kissed his lips, allowing it to linger a little longer. “I missed you too, baby.”
He kissed her lips again before letting her go. Bending over to pick up her duffle bag, he carried her bag and small suitcase into the house. Once he closed the door, Kennedy took a good look at her loving boyfriend. Messy curls framing his face, Harry wore a goofy smile as he stood there sporting nothing but gray sweatpants.
“This is the best surprise ever.”
Kennedy’s cheek began to hurt from the smile that seemed permanent on her face. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. Slightly thin, but plump, the feel of Harry’s lips sent her mind into a state of intoxication. Sweet and soft like cotton candy, she stabilized the connection of their lips for a few seconds longer.
Harry moaned as Kennedy lightly massaged his scalp with her fingertips.
“I haven’t seen you in so long. I was so anxious to spend time with you for the next couple of weeks. I figured I’ll start a little early,” she pecked his lips once more.
“Plus,” she whispered. She slowly dragged her hand down his chest to the inside of his sweatpants. “our FaceTime sessions weren’t cutting it anymore.”
Harry gasped, trying to surpass a groan as she rubbed her palm from the base to the head. If he was being honest, he intensely missed the feeling of her as well. Phone sex was nice, but nothing compared to the real thing. And his hands didn’t feel the same as hers.
Without warning, he flung her over his shoulder. A squeal escaped her mouth as he carried her to his bedroom.
First he felt the weight of her body on his chest. Letting his eyes adjust to the sunlight blaring through his half-closed curtains, Harry blinked a couple of times before he looked down. He smiled once he saw the familiar head of hair attached to the woman he loved the most. He sighed contently as he tightened his arm around her, pulling their naked bodies closer.
Using his free arm, he reached over to the side table to grab his phone. 0830. The movement caused Kennedy to stir. She looked up at him and kissed under his chin.
“Good morning.”
Harry rubbed his hand across her shoulder. “Good morning, baby. Did you sleep okay?”
She nodded. “More than okay.”
He kissed her forehead before he reached her lips.
“Are you busy today?” She asked.
“I am, actually. I have meetings pretty much all day today and tomorrow. But after that, I’m all yours, I promise.” He slid his arm from her shoulder to her hip, giving it a small squeeze. “I’m sorry.”
The couple doesn’t see each other often, due to Harry’s hectic schedule and living in different countries. For that reason, Harry made sure he was completely work-free whenever Kennedy was around. But Kennedy understood that her arrival was unexpected, which prevented Harry from rearranging his schedule.
“No, no, that’s okay. Honestly, I’m probably gonna sleep all day. Maybe hit up Gemma for lunch or something.”
His heart warmed at the thought of her hanging out with his sister. “That’s a good idea. Maybe we should drive to Holmes Chapel and spend a few days with my mum. She would love to see you. I swear she loves you more than she loves me.”
“The feeling’s mutual.” Kennedy yelped, followed by laughter when a slap contacted her bare butt.
“Heyyyyy, not funny.” Harry wanted to appear upset with his furrowed eyebrows and flared nostrils, but the corner of his lip curving upward blew his cover.
She attacked his neck with soft kisses. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding.” She continued her attack while gradually increasing the force of her kisses. Harry moaned when she reached his ear, his soft spot. His hands traveled down her body, stopping at her butt, giving it a tight squeeze. She knew he was getting turned on.
Her thoughts were confirmed when he turned their bodies so he was completely on top of her. Positioning the duvet, he made sure they were still covered. He kissed her lips before gently rubbing their noses together.
“I love you.”
“I love you more.” Kennedy lightly grazed her pointer finger across his bottom lip.
Harry shook his head. “Impossible.”
Placing the key into the corresponding keyhole, Gemma unlocked the front door, gaining entrance into Harry’s home. Harry gave her a copy of his house key for the sole purpose of checking on it while he was away on tour. Out of respect for his privacy, she usually rang his doorbell just like any other guest when he was home. But she knew he liked to go running during mornings so she wasn’t sure if he was home at that moment.
She came to drop off his cellphone that he used strictly for work and his music. He ate dinner with her and her fiancé, Michal, at their house the previous night and accidentally forgot it. She promised to return it before he left to meet with his manager, Jeff.
She figured the best room to place his phone was the bedroom so she starting hiking up the stairs. Hearing a noise, Gemma paused. Shrugging, she walked closer to Harry’s bedroom. She stopped again. Multiple smacking noises echoed through the quiet hallway like two people were kissing. Turning the corner, Harry’s bed was in plain view.
The duvet only covered half of Harry’s body, leaving the back of his head and back exposed. Leaning on his elbows and forearms for support, he thrust with force, producing sounds of skin slapping together.
“fuck … fuck baby,” Harry grunted in complete ecstasy. Quick, hushed feminine moans followed his, indicating equal sensations of high pleasure.
Absolutely terrified, Gemma struggled between backing away slowly in order to prevent making a disturbance and running away as fast as she could. Placing the phone on the kitchen table, Gemma rushed out of the house.
“I think Harry is cheating on Kennedy.”
Surprised, Michal choked on his water. After coughing to clear his airway, he responded, “I’m sorry?”
“I think Harry is cheating on Kennedy,” Gemma repeated. Michal called her during his lunch break, a routine he followed for years. What she saw that morning invaded her mind so she confided in her fiancé.
“Gemma, have you gone mad?”
“No! I wish! I saw him! I … I heard him!”
Michal pushed his lunch aside, no longer having the desire to eat. “This is so unlike him.” He thought aloud.
“Michal, I know what I saw. When I stopped by his house this morning to drop off his phone. He was having sex and I know it wasn’t with Kennedy because she’s not coming here until next week.”
“No, I believe you. I’m just shocked,” he reassured. “It seemed like he basically worshipped the ground she walked on, you know?”
“She has gone so much just by being seen with him. All of those nasty comments, the hate pages, the blog posts. Some immature girls were calling her job trying to get her fired.” Her emotions spiraled out of control as she ranted.
“But she never complained. She never lashed out. She told me she believed he was worth the hassle. That’s why she never left. And this is how my dickhead of a brother repays her?”
Gemma’s lips trembled as her eyes began to water. “She’s one of my bridesmaids in our wedding, Michal. How could he do this to her?”
“Love …” Michal started but was interrupted.
“She called me earlier, but I couldn’t talk to her knowing my brother is cheating on her.”
Michal heard shuffling through the phone. “I’m going to go talk to him. He needs to tell her before she flys here from America next week.”
“Woah, woah,” he said. “I don’t think you should talk to him right now. Not while you’re upset. Use the rest of today to calm down. Then we’ll talk about it some more when I get home.”
“Okay,” Gemma snuffled as she wiped her eyes. “You’re right.”
“I gotta go. I’ll see you in a couple of hours. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
The sound of the doorbell prompted Harry to leave his comfortable spot on the couch and tread to the front door. Who he saw on the other side of the door caused the wide grin planted on his face.
“Gem!” Followed by a quick hug and a peck on her cheek. “What are you doing here? Not that you need a reason to see me, I just wasn’t expecting you.”
Gemma overlooked his appearance. He was practically glowing. Looked well-rested and refreshed. Unlike when she saw him last where the bags under his eyes were prominent. Disgusting. It’s been two days since she caught him cheating. Not an ounce of regret radiated in his body language even though he knew he was hurting Kennedy. This wasn’t the man their mom raised him to be.
“I came because I need to talk to you.”
Noticing the stern tone in her voice, Harry grew slightly uneasy. Different scenarios invaded his mind. Was Michal okay? Was their mom okay?
He followed her lead into the living room, sitting on the arm of the couch opposite of her. She was nervous and he didn’t understand why. She played with her jeans for a bit before looking at him in his eyes. Just as she opened her mouth to speak, she heard “Gemma?”
Turning her head towards the source, she almost gasped at who she saw. Kennedy walked towards her with her arms open. She was engulfed in a tight hug, too shocked to hug back but Kennedy didn’t seem to notice.
“Hey girl!” Kennedy exclaimed.
Gemma managed to find her voice. “Hey! I didn’t realize you were here.”
“Yeah, I’ve been here for a few days now,” she explained. She allowed Harry to pull her closer to him. A small giggle escaped when he kissed her on the cheek. “I decided to surprise Harry and fly out a little early.”
Harry wasn’t having sex with a random girl, Gemma realized. He was with Kennedy the entire time. Fighting back tears of happiness, joy, and relief, she smiled at her little brother’s girlfriend. “How lovely.”
“I called you like two days ago to invite you to lunch. But I figured you were busy with your sunglasses line.”
No, Gemma avoided the call because she thought Harry was a dirty cheater. Now she realized how wrong she was. Harry looked at his partner with great admiration like she handmade the sun that shone above him every time he’s with her. He really loved her and would never do anything to purposely hurt her.
“Yeah, sorry about that. I completely forgot to call you back,” Gemma lied. “But we can go now if you guys don’t have anything planned. There’s a new restaurant I’ve been dying to try.”
“Oh, let’s do that,” Kennedy beamed. “Lemme finish my hair and then I’ll be ready.” Harry lightly squeezed her hip before dropping the arm that previously wrapped around her waist. He turned to his sister once Kennedy was out of the room.
“What do you need to talk to me about?”
“I …” Gemma hesitated. To be honest, guilt from accusing him of infidelity turned her stomach. She couldn’t believe she thought so lowly of her brother. She couldn’t let him know that. “You looked so tired the last time I saw you. And you leaving your work phone … you’ve never been a forgetful person, so I was worried about you, I guess.”
Harry’s body visibly eased at the same time his expression softened. He pinched her cheek and cooed like he was speaking to a baby. “You love your little brother.” He fought back laughter when his sister glared at him. “I do find it a bit difficult to fall asleep when Kennedy’s not with me if I’m being honest. Is that weird? Am I too attached to her?”
Gemma smiled warmly. “No, I sometimes have the same problem when I’m away from Michal. It means you’re madly in love.”
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necrokittytales · 6 years
Text
Necrokitty Tales: Trouble in Inkwell Isle (Chapter 9)
Authors’ note: Remember, Necrida’s writing will be in italics and SPKC’s writing with be regular font.If you have no idea what this roleplaying thing is, you can start from the beginning here.
Harvey entered the door with a slight limp and was immediately immersed in the chaos of his family. He could see his mother in the kitchen and tried to slink past her so she did not pick up the condition he was in.
Unfortunately, he hadn't gone more than a few feet when her ears suddenly went rigid. She turned around quickly and spotted her son, scuffed up, a fresh cut on his ankle, his cheeks still slightly damp
with tears...and his clothes torn.
“HARVEY! WHAT HAPPENED?” His mother shrieked, running over to her son and immediately smothering him.
Harvey sniffled. “I'm okay, mom, really.”
“Your overall button's been torn clean off!”
One of his sisters came by, “Do you have a cut on your leg?”
“Torn. Clean. Off!” His mother exasperatedly repeated, pulling at the fabric. “Tell me what happened!”
“My friend and I were walking home from school and some bullies took her special notebook and threw it into Cagney's field. And when we went to go get it, Cagney attacked us.”
Mrs. Hare ground her incisors together. “Did he now? Who does that weed think he is?! I swear if I ever see him again, I'll give him a piece of my mind, alright!”
“Mom, it's okay.”
“Heather! Go get the weed killer from the garden!”
“You mean the gardening hoe!”
“Don't sass me, girl, and just give it to me.”
“Mom! Really! It's okay. Okay? I'm okay. Please don't try to attack him.” His mom could be a very passionate rabbit when the situation called for it and he was fairly certain she would passionately lose to Cagney very quickly if he allowed the situation to continue.
She huffed and placed the hoe in the kitchen. “He's lucky your father is not home. Your father knows people, you know.”
“Yeah, I know,” Harvey sighed. He thought about the situation. “Do you think we could have carrot cake tonight? I think carrot cake would really make me feel a lot better.” He asked hopefully. This day could still be turned around.
Mrs. Hare softened. “Oh course, my little dust bunny. Now go get washed up, okay?”
Harvey smiled, feeling better. “Thanks, mom.”
---
The bats reached their home. Isabella landed carefully and helped Mina get off her back.
"Now you get your little trouble making tushie to the shower, and you better have your nails clipped when you get out of there!".
"Yes mama...". She noticed she was still angry so she limped her way to the bathroom.
Isabella sat in the kitchen table, still agitated. When she heard the door of the bathroom close she released her pain in the shape of silent tears. She hated Italy, she hated italians, she hated everything that reminded her of that country.
After a few minutes, Isabella calmed herself down and decided to check on her girl.
After the day she had, Mina thought she deserved a bath instead of a shower. While the bathtub was filling up she looked at the clipper, then her nails, then the clipper again. She decided too keep her claws since they have proven to be very useful when in trouble and hid the clipper behind the toilet seat with a smirk.
The little b-cat got inside the bathtub and layed as she relaxed. She started thinking of her notebook. All that research and discoveries lost forever! Her eyes started to fill with tears.
She looked at her big bruise in her leg. The pain was starting to go away but the purple mark was still very noticeable. For once, she was glad her mum couldn't see, or she would have definitely beat up an apology out of the flower.
Isabella walked in after knocking at the door. "How are we doing here?" She said cheerfully.
"Good" Mina replied wiping her eyes and hiding her bruised leg as a reflex. She was glad to hear the lighter tone in her mother's voice.
Isabella sat at the border of the bathtub. "So you were defending your new friend from a bully?" The bat said keeping her friendly tone.
"Yeah" Mina nodded "Spike and his stupid friend Todd! Yesterday he wanted to steal Harvey's money, and today he wanted my adventure journal! And now its lost forever!" She couldn't hold her tears anymore and cried.
Isabella's heart melted again. She tenderly rubbed her daughter's back to try to comfort her. "Oh! Don't cry 'dulceata'. I'll go tomorrow and take it back from Mr Flower" She smiled at her.
"You think he'll give it back?" The little girl wiped her tears and her eyes filled with hope.
"If not I'll have to show him what a BECH I can be!" Isabella lifted a closed fist in the air. Mina chuckled, she understood the play on words, they were the Bechstains and kids at other schools already  pointed out the similarity of pronunciation with the B-word insult. "Nobody steals from my 'înger' and lives to tell it.”
Mina admired her mother's determination, but after seeing what the flower could do she wasn't sure she could take him down. Still, she felt better knowing she might have her journal back. She hugged her mum spilling water everywhere.
"Oh! Mina!... " the mother complained but returned the hug with a smile. Suddenly, the woman remembered the smell that made her nose itch. She had smelled it before in some clubs she used to sing for with her band. "Dandelion!"
Mina cocked her head in surprise "What?".
"What?... nothing.... let me see those claws," The bat said nervously.
---
"Ok, fuck this!" Hilda muttered angry frustrated that no matter how many times she broomed there was still shards of glass coming out. She was tired and in pain. She wondered if Cagney might have busted a rib or something. She still couldn't believe what he did. Where did all that hate came from?
She looked at the now open ceiling and pulled the switch to see if the white sheet was still working.
It was a bad idea.
The second the sheet moved a new rain of sharp shards fell into room covering it again. Hilda sighed and decided to go have a raspberry tea.
She took a few sips of her tea and breathed deeply. Her entire chest was sore. She had pretty big bruises circling her upper body.
'You know, I changed my mind' Taurus spoke 'lets go to this Friday and KILL HIM'.
Hilda hold her head between her hands with a exasperated sigh. She wondered if she overreacted by telling him to leave his own surprise birthday, but... he almost killed her! THAT was overreacting. She just couldn't believe how things escalated so quickly.
This remind it her she had to fill the damn hole he made outside her home, there wasn't much she could do for the tree though.
And what about the dome? She will have to talk with Grimm and Djimmi again to make it as perfect as she wanted it. But who would pay for it? She spent most of her savings keeping this place from crumbling.
'Cagney broke it... shouldn't he be the one to pay for it?'  Sagittarius carefully said in Hilda's mind.
The woman rolled her eyes at the idea. She could almost hear the giant weed laughing at her face. Plus, he probably didn't even had that kind of money. How much can you make selling flowers?
The soreness was driving her mad. She lifted her shirt to check on her bruises again. Her pale skin was covered with all kinds of purple and blue shades, with an occasional red line. Some of the smaller thorns got stuck deep on her skin. She tried to take them off only to hurt herself even more. After a few tries she gave up and looked at the time. She should get moving if she wanted to put up the stars in time... but she really didn't feel like it tonight.
---
Amber was very perceptive. Or at least, she liked to believe she was. Which was she was somewhat irritated to learn that she had just missed a huge brawl earlier that day. Brawls led to distractions. Distractions led to open pockets. And opened pockets led to a happy Amber.
She finished applying her gloves and stretched. She wondered who had been stupid enough to actually trespass in the carnation's field. Even she wasn't stupid enough to do that. Trying to get the sneak on something that just had to stick its hand in the ground and it could kill you? Yeah, no thanks.
It was bad enough she had encountered him at the observatory. What the heck had he been doing there anyway? If she had to have guessed, it might have been a date but there was no way that could have been the case.
She sighed at the missed opportunity and eyed her next target, the Clip Joint Calamity. There was going to be a brawl tonight. And liquor. Between the both of those, she could look forward to a very satisfying night indeed.
--
Harvey felt much better after a shower and a change of clothes. Dinner helped him perk up a bit. And the smell of dessert in the oven did make him feel pretty swell. But he was very worried for Mina. Her mom looked really really mad. He only hoped that he would get to see her tomorrow. And apologize for not being a really brave bunny.
He sat at the dinner table and squared his little furry fists together. Starting today, he was going to be a braver bunny. A bunny who knew how to kick with the best of them. So bullies like Spike and Todd wouldn't pick on kids like Harvey and Mina. He'd be the bravest and most courageous bunny the isle had ever seen.
There was a knock at the door and his mom called out, "Just a minute!"
Harvey stood up, chin up. Why not start being brave now. "Don't worry, mom. I got it," he declared, waltzing over to the front door.
"Thank you, Harvey. Can't imagine who it would be. The sun's just setting at this point. A little late for visitors," Mrs. Hare mused as Harvey reached the door.
Harvey pulled open the door with a, "Good evening can I-?" And stopped dead in his tracks. Staring down at him with a sharp scowl was Cagney Carnation.
"Hey, listen-."
Harvey managed a choked yelp and slammed the door shut. Mrs. Hare looked over irritated. "Harvey Hare, don't you go slamming doors around here! The frames can't take that much force these days!"
The little rabbit swallowed as there was a harder knock on the door. Mrs. Hare washed her paws. "I'll be right there."
"No," Harvey realized, "I got it, sorry! Just, uh, stay there mom. Is the cake burning?"
"I should hope not!" She gasped, turning her attention back to the stove.
Harvey cracked open the door and looked up worriedly at the carnation. "Y-you better leave or I'm gonna-gonna," he struggled.
Cagney realized the boy was probably going to need some encouragement.  "Get out here before I drag you out," he grumbled.
Harvey's eyes widened, not wanting a repeat of this afternoon. He quickly walked outside, leaving the door ajar in case he need a quick escape. Cagney loomed over him, something tucked under his arms.
Harvey pressed his paws. "I'm really, really, really sorry we went into your field."
"Okay, good to hear. Now-"
"Please don't feed me to the piranha plants."
"Oh for God's sake, I'm not gonna feed you to the piranha plants," he rolled his eyes.
"You promise?" Harvey asked.
"Just, shut up a second. And don't cry. I'm here to apologize." The words were like lead coming off his tongue but he managed to spit it out.
Harvey rubbed his ears, confused. "Huh, what did you say?" There was no way he could have heard that correctly.
"Harvey, who's at the door?" Mrs. Hare pushed open the door and her smile froze. She glared up at Cagney. "YOU! You stay right there!" She demanded, dashing back inside.
Cagney blinked and glanced at Harvey. "Uh, what?"
Harvey swallowed, realizing that he was not about to get fed to carnivorous plants. "She's getting weed killer."
The carnation's eyes widened. "Woah, woah, wait, wait a minute there!"
Mrs. Hare busted open the door, brandishing her hoe. "I've got my weed killer, you dirty dandelion!" She snapped.
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The flower stared at her. "That's a hoe."
"Don't you sass me! Now why are you here bothering my son?" She demanded.
"I'm trying to apologize!" Cagney spat out.
She stopped brandishing the garden utensil. "Eh, what?"
"I'm apologizing, okay?"
"Really?" She asked.
"Yeah."
Mrs. Hare had a funny expression on her face, as if she didn't quite understand. "I uh, oh. Huh. Okay then. Thank you."
Harvey noted the carnation looking irritated still. "Mom, the timer went off for the cake."
"It did? Huh. Okay, just, hold this just to be safe," she instructed, handing the hoe to Harvey. She shot Cagney a quizzical look. "Well, color me surprised. If you start acting nice like this, I might know a daisy or two looking for a date to the dance coming up."
He stuck out his tongue. "Hell, no."
She laughed and walked back inside, leaving a calmer Harvey. The rabbit still wasn't quite sure. "You're apologizing to me?"
"Yeah. Sorry for nearly killing your friend and banging you up a bit. I thought you were someone else."
Harvey scratched his head with the hoe. "Oh, Uh, well, thanks. I appreciate that. I'll stay out of your field." He brightened up and pointed at the carnation. "But uh, you should say sorry to Mina!" He pointed out, a burst of courage in his chest. The carnation fixed him with a disbelieving look and Harvey faltered. "Please? She was really upset."
The flower sighed. "Yeah, I was going to. Do you know where she lives?" Harvey hesitated and Cagney threw his hands out. "I'm not going to do anything bad. I'm just going to apologize, got it?"
The rabbit nodded slowly. "Okay, she lives by Chip. Near the observatory."
Cagney hissed quietly to himself. That was a bit too close to Hilda than he would have liked. But he had already come this far. And chances were, she was already out and about. "Alright, thanks kid, appreciate that."
Harvey nodded and was about to go back inside when he stopped. "You better be nice to her or I'm gonna hit you with this hoe," he blurted out. Cagney chuckled.
"Well, well, looks like the bunny has a backbone.  I'll keep that in mind. Don't let your mom blab to too many residents, please."
----
It was dark out and Cagney had some difficulty finding his way above ground but he soon came across the home of the bats. It wasn't much to look at, but to be fair, he slept on dirt under a tree three quarters of the year, so a house was a house.
He saw the observatory and his stomach clenched. The dome was broken. There needed to be a new one but the cost alone was for this piece of astronomy equipment was, well, astronomical. Even if he was on speaking terms with Hilda, he barely had anything to his name. Still, that's not why he was here. He was here to see the bats.
He knocked on the door and flexed his feet. It still felt weird to be walking around uprooted. He never quite got used to the feeling. It was a bit unsettling sometimes. He waited for someone to answer the door.
"I'll get it mama" Mina stood up from the table and opened the door. Her eyes widened and immediately closed it back.
" Mina! What are you doing?"
"Run! He's come to finish me off!" Mina hold the door.
Cagney swore under his breath something along the lines of "for fucks sake" before knocking it again.
"Oh c'mon Mina..." Isabella opened the door this time, ignoring her child begging her not to, and crossed her arms. She stood there serious, pointing her ears at Cagney and discretely delighting herself with the scent of carnation.
--
Hilda stared at her empty cup for a while now. She was feeling bad for not putting on any stars. After a few minutes she stood up, packed some stars muttering colorful insults for a plant and went out to cast a cloud.
She started to gain some altitude when she notice a familiar figure on the neighbors house. She immediately casted more clouds to hide herself.
"What the hell he's doing there?" She whispered to herself, and discreetly moved her clouds closer across the sky.
Cagney found himself facing Mina's mother and had to resist the urge to let his thorns out. The woman was blind for fuck's sake, it's not like she could see how uncomfortable he was being there.
He swallowed and began carefully. "So, hi, listen, I'm here to...apologize," he managed. The word still felt like lead in his mouth. It was an awful word. He glanced at Mina who definitely was eyeing with some pretty righteous suspicion.
Isabella smiled enjoying how uncomfortable this was for him.
"Mina" she called her daughter who came out cautiously "Do you accept his apology?".
Mina was uncomfortable with the situation as well. "Eh... y-yeah? Thank you Mr Carnation".
---
Hilda was sorry she couldn't get any closer, but at least she managed to get a good view.
---
"Don't mention it. Seriously, DON'T mention it," he emphasized, "I'm really sorry about this all. But so help you if this gets around that I'm going around apologizing then I'm going to have bigger problems to deal with."
He hesitated. "And, uh, I think this is yours." He held out her notebook to her, "That's a pretty good drawing of Venus," he admitted.
"My adventure journal!" Mina opened her eyes widely holding the need to cry of happiness and took her precious notebook like she was holding a treasure. "Oh!" She hugged his leg "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!"
Isabella was pleasantly surprised and smiled sincerely. "That is very nice of you, Mr Carnation. And here I was thinking we were up to a bad start" her smile turning more charming.
Cagney resisted the instinct for his thorns to pop out at the sudden contact and froze briefly before realizing that this was a hug and not an attack at his legs. He carefully brought a hand down, tempted to pry her off but just kind of patted her head. "Yeah, yeah, don't mention it. I'd kinda be upset too if I lost something like that."
He glanced at her mother. "So, uh, are you and I cool, Miss, uh...?"
"Isabella Bechstein" she stretched her arm to offer a handshake. "And... we will be ok after I talk to you for a minute. Mina, please go to your room. I need to talk to Mr Carnation".
Mina nodded "Good night, Mr Carnation!" and she hopped happily to her room. There was a sound of a door closing.
---
Hilda's eyes widened incredulously. Was... a kid hugging Cagney? Why would any kid hug Cagney?
'Because he is charming as hell!?' Gemini replied giggling.
"Oh! Shut up!" Hilda tried to control her emotions even though she agreed. That damn dandelion can be a real gentlemen if he wanted to... like that time at the---she shook her head to prevent any more thoughts to run wild in her head and focus on what was going on.
Hilda was watching even more carefully now.
'What is going on?' Sagitarius slowly spoke.
'Argh! Can't we get closer?' Gemini complained.
"Shhhh!" The woman was starting to lose her patience.
---
Cagney brushed his petals back and shook her hand. "Fair enough. Cagney is fine, by the way. Mr. Carnation was my dad," he explained.
"Wait, shhh" the woman stood in front of him quiet shaking her hears towards the door. After a few seconds the ears stopped abruptly and she turned towards the door.
"I said, to your room, Mina!".
"No way!" Mina's voice sounded from the stop of the stairs "How did you know!? I was super quiet!" This time she slammed the door from the other side.
Isabella smiled proud of herself.
"Sorry about that. What were we... ah! Yeah, I'll call you Cagney then" her tone was really enticing. "So... there is no easy way to say this... so I'll just go ahead" she lowered her voice and got close to him. "Are you a junky?" She asked, back to being angry.
---
'Maybe she's an old friend?' Sagittarius carefully asked.
"What? She just moved in! Plus I've been with Cagney since... forever! I think I would know if he had a bat friend..."
'I guess...'
'They do look awfully friendly though.... ' Taurus stepped in 'look! She's getting closer to him!'
Everybody stared in silence.
---
Cagney's eyes nearly fell out of his head. "WHAT?! Definitely not!  I do not-why are you-?" He stopped talking, realizing what exactly she was referring to. He whistled. "Okay, for being blind, you're pretty perceptive. So, listen."
He got a little bit closer to her, so as not to be overheard by a potential eavesdropper in the form a tiny bat. "I uh, accidentally hit myself with my own dandelions. How familiar are you with dandelions?" He was hoping further instruction wasn't going to be necessary but it probably was judging by her face. Still he waited to see if this was the case, already putting together an explanation in his head.
Isabella had a good idea what dandelions did, but admitting it might not be so good for her reputation if she was planning on staying here a while.
"I know enough to prevent my kid to get close to it... what does it do exactly?" She played dumb.
Hilda was getting livid. Now Cagney was getting close!
"You ever blow on a dandelion and can't help but feel a little bit dizzy afterwards? Yeah, multiply that by a 100 and that's what I can do." He groaned.  "It's a self defense thing. They're not fast, but if someone runs into one, it creates a sense of motion sickness, dysphoria and a lot of confusion."
"I was trying to make some up when Mina's book landed nearby and scared the shit out of me...and I took one right in the kisser." He hung his head low at that. "It's really embarrassing..."
"Got to admit, it probably didn't help the fact that I have got pretty much no sleep last night after my friend's home got broken into while I was over. And your kid really looked like the cat who who did it."
He held out his hands. "I started putting two and two together when she didn't sound the same and she had wings...but then her rabbit friend started throwing stuff and then everything kind of went to shit."
Isabella listened attentively and cocked her head. "Y... you... make those..."
She was a bit confused, but it sure it was good to now that this fella can manufacture them. "And that's terrible, about your friend's house" her voice turning sweet again. "Does she live far from here? It’s not like I have a treasure in there" she pointed at her house "but I wouldn't want my little 'înger' getting hurt."
Hilda's cloud was getting grayer.
Cagney hesitated. "Yeah, she runs the observatory. Well ran it. I'm not sure she's going to be able to open anything more than some exhibits and minor stargazing for a bit. A couple things got a bit wrecked last night. " Like a friendship and possible relationship he wanted to add but kept that to himself.
He realized she called the little bat something else. "Wait, I thought her name was Mina?"
Isabella laughed "Her name is Mina, înger means angel in romanian. I'm romanian. And no. I'm not related to Dracula" she smiled. "It’s really too bad about the observatory... I'll try to pass by tomorrow see if I can help somehow." She open her mouth hesitantly and finally decided to speak. "Say... eh... this is going to be too forward but, if it's not too much trouble, perhaps you could show me around whenever you have free time? I would like to meet new people but it's kinda hard when you can't... well, see them". She hated to admit she had limitations.
Unless she had ability to blow glass with her wings, there probably wasn't much she'd be able to do about the observatory.
Huh. Romanian. Explained the accent. Cagney thought about asking why the heck they'd come to a place like this if they were from some other place like that but decided against it. People had their reasons and as long as it didn't lead to too many weird people showing up, he was fine to leave well enough alone. He was, however, caught off guard by her request.
"I am probably the worst person to ask, but considering you haven't come at me with a gardening hoe, I wouldn't mind showing you around," he agreed. At the very least, he could weed out the individuals that would try to mess with a blind woman. "I've got a free day tomorrow if you've got time? Not sure how settled in you are yet."
"Splendid!" She joined her hands cheerly. "I can make some time in the morning."
The sky was almost covered with dark clouds and sounds of menacing thunders were getting louder.
Cagney nodded, a slightly genuine smile on his face. "Mornings are good for me. I'll come pick you around 9?" He paused, "We may have to take a few breaks just cause I'm not the best at walking long distance without putting my feet in some soil. Will that be alright?"
He didn't know why he would check with her on that. It's not like he wasn't going to do it but there was something a bit attractive about her that made him extend the question. Maybe it was her looks. Or the fact that she was stubborn. Or the fact that he's pretty sure she swore him out earlier and that was always kind of fun.
The woman showed a delightfully charming smile at the flower. She was starting to find him interesting. "There is no problem in stopping now and then, " she said with her enticing voice "I'm not much of a walker either" she spread her wings in a innocently seductive pose to show she was more of a flyer. A huge thunder filled the sky.
Cagney looked at her elegant figure and felt himself swallow a bit harder than he intended. "Ah ha, yeah, wings. Those are nice. Er, flying. Flying must be nice." What was with him and girls that could fly? It was beginning to become a pattern, he realized, catching a glimpse of her curves.
The sound of thunder in the sky brought him back to reality.  He didn't remember there being any storm in the forecast. Then again, he hadn't really consulted the forecast since it was connected to Hilda. And the last thing he wanted was to be caught in the rain trying to find his way back home in the dark. "Well, it was a surprisingly nice to meet you and your daughter. I'll see you tomorrow morning then?"
"Tomorrow morning it is" the bat said with a caramel voice. She was about to turn around "oh! I forgot to thank you for bringing back Mina's notebook" she got close to him but she realised, thanks to her echolocation, that she wouldn't reach  the flower's face. "Hm... would you mind lowering for me?"she smiled and tried to keep that sweet tone.
He raised an eyebrow at her but shrugged and leaned down, figuring she was going to tell him something she didn't want her daughter to overhear. "Sure, what'd you-?"
Isabella softly kissed Cagney's cheek. "Good night" she whispered.
A huge lightning illuminated the scene followed by a terrifying thunder. "Dumnezeule! You be okay walking home under the storm?" She asked, worried.
Cagney felt himself completely heat up at the unexpected kiss and his mind went blank. He stood there a bit slack jawed until her words registered. He quickly shook his head to clear his thoughts.
"I uh storm. Yeah, no I'll be fine. Don't worry. I'll go by underground worst case. You have a good night, Isabella." The carnation backed up only to trip over his own feet. He got back up quickly. "I'm okay!" He assured her before taking off back to his home as his entire plant body still tingled from the small gesture.
He hadn't been kissed by a non flower in uh forever? And her lips had been so soft against his face that he was surprised he kept it together. Maybe that was a Romanian thing. A guy could get in a lot of trouble living with women like that.
Hell, he should apologize more often if that was a possible result. It was handy that Isabella was available tomorrow. Cagney was fairly sure he had something planned for Friday.
He stopped dead in his tracks. "Hilda," he realized out loud. He had actually managed to work up the courage to ask her out. Sorta. He chickened out and didn't specify it was a date persay, but it was definitely different than their normal types of hangouts so she had to have known something was up. He even put a reminder note on the flower he brought for her. Which he was pretty sure she had probably smashed in her anger.
Their date was Friday. "There was no way in hell she'd go. She probably wouldn't even remember and if she did, there's no way she would go," he told himself with an irritated sigh. Would he go? He didn't know. Maybe? Just to prove himself right that she wouldn't show.
He kept walking. Well, just as well Hilda was nowhere around. The last thing he needed was for her to be lurking around, listening in and getting the wrong idea about things. He still wanted to never see her again...right?
Isabella chuckled at Cagney and heard him leaving. She stood there a few more minutes delighting herself with the carnation's aroma that was still in the air and enjoying the noisy rain. She loved the rain. It felt good to hear the thunders over her head filling the emptiness.
---
Finally it started to downpour. Hilda was holding her head trying to keep the constellations in control.
'Let me have him! Let me have him!'
'He doesn't love us anymore!' Gemini started crying.
'I-it's probably not what it looks like...' Sagittarius tried to comfort the others 'maybe they did know each other?'
Hilda went back to her observatory seeing red.
"Unbelievable! That... that damn weed piece of... cutted grass-I can't even think of a good insult!" She went directly to her room and let herself fall on the bed. "...ooh... I know! I'll go this Friday, alright, but... with a 'friend'. I'll give him a reason to not want to see me again!".
Gemini stopped crying abruptly  ´oh! Who we gonna pick?!' They said cheerfully.
'I don't think this is a good idea guys... and may I remind us, we did tried to poke his eyes out' Sagittarius tried to reason with them.
'After he snapped a Goddamn tree in front of us!' Taurus immediately replied getting agitated.
"Aaargh! quiet already!" Hilda silenced them and layed in bed thinking about how was she going to get anyone to go with her in such short notice.
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Text
Germany(Doitsu)~Ludwig Beilschmidt
I think....I think war is about to start. This is the worst that could happen... When you're in your last highschool year,your dad is dead,your little sister just started school,you and your mum working,to keep the basic needs payed...winter being so harsh,needing more warm clothes,paying for school needs...I swear,I just want to kill myself and get this over with...but I know mum and sis will pay for my actions as well,so I keep my head high. They need me,just as much as I need them.We only have each other left in this cruel world. So,as I was exiting the highschool yard,I hear a sweet high-pitched voice calling for me. 
Lucy:S/O!!S/O!! me:*turning around*Huh?Lucy?!What are you doing here?! Lucy:I waited for you,silly!I didn't want to go home alone! me:*crouching at her level*You should have told me!You waited here for a whole hour?! Lucy:Yep! me:What if I wouldn't have heard you?Or...what if you wouldn't have seen me?You would have been lost! Lucy:Oh...I'm sorry...I didn't think about it... me:*hugging her**sighing*Please,before anything,let me what you want to do,so nothing bad will happen,okay sweetheart? Lucy:YES!! me:*putting her on my shoulders*Okay,let's go home,princess! Lucy:Onward,my trusty stallion!! 
I chuckled as I started walking back home,when I started noticing some blonde men,dressed in dark green uniforms,with guns attached on their backs. What the hell...? Is it..what I think it is...? Hope I'm wrong though...
Lucy:S/O!S/O!Can you put me down for a little,please? 
me:Umm...okay...*putting her down*But don't to anythi--HEY,WAIT! 
Then,he got off his cross necklace and put it around her neck,smiling slightly.
Lucy:Woaw!!It's sooo beautiful!!Thank you,Ludwig!!
He did a half-smile and shook his head in a dismissive way. 
Lucy:Bye bye,Ludwig!Hope we'll see you again tomorrow!! me:*small smile*Thank you and have a good day! 
He nodded,as we went back home. 
me:*chuckling*What was in your head,going to talk with that random person? Lucy:He was looking at you!And he looked good!He seems like a nice person,doesn't he? me:*blushing faintly*Yeah...I guess so... 
~~~~TIMESKIP~~~~~
I grabbed my guitar and went to play/sing outside. I'm trying to get some spare money,as Lucy's birthday is next weekend,and I still need some money to at least buy her a decent present...plus...Christmas is coming as well... 
"I'm waking up to ash and dust/I wipe my brow and I sweat my rust/I'm breathing in the chemical." 
Leaving the guitar case on the ground,I played the whole day and recieved about 30$. It's a huge thing for me,cause I have never gotten this much...Now...I have...about 300$.Guess I can finally buy her something for Christmas and her birthday...Finally... 
Okay...I guess tomorrow we buy the presents...Guess I made it just in time.In 3 days it's Christmas Eve. I put back the guitar in the case,strap it on my back and start strolling back home,trying to forget about the harsh cold winter wind that was whiping my tender,almost frozen skin.There is a price to pay,if you want to see the love on your loved ones' face. Okay now....hurry hurry...it's not really that much until I get home...I wonder if Ludwig was here... Oh what the hell is with me?! Hn...Okay now forget about it!It's not like we will ever meet again,unfortunately... I mean...he's a soldier...and there is going to be a war... Oh dammit..only the thought of a war...is...killer... Every horrible thing that is going to happen...I can feel it in the air...the tension...It's another World War...  Walking further on,burried in my own thoughts,I didn't realize where I was going,until I bumped into someone. 
me:Oh,I'm so sorry!I wasn't looking where I was walking... -?-:Nein,Eet ist okay... me:Eh?Ludwig? Ludwig:Ah,S/O...Nice to...see you...ummm... me:*smiling softly*Yeah,It's nice seeing you again.How are you? Ludwig:Ehm...Ich bin gut...patrolling the neighbourhood.... me:That's...umm..*looking around*There is going to be a war,won't it?And...My country...(c/n)...is...supposed to be an ally of Germany?Or...Are we already assaulted?*looking at him worried* 
Ludwig looked at me with that tough look on his face,but those icy blue eyes were sparkling with worry,concern and guilt. Ludwig:....Ja...It is going to be a war...a bad one...(c/n) is under German control and protection...You are supposed to be safe though... me:*nodding*Yes...I was assuming something like this...This are going to be very bad...Are you...going to go in the real battle?Please tell me you will stay here where it is...safer...right? Ludwig:*blushing slightly*Ich...don't know...I am...um...one of Germany's best soldier...I may be deployed in the main battles... me:I hope not...who...would protect this place then...?Not many people are as nice as you with...umm..."prisoners"...not even relatives are nice with each other sometimes... Ludwig:Ich vill be okay,don't vorry about me....und ich kan make shure jou vill be safe,zo don't vorry...*looking away* me:I'm not really worried about me as I am about you...after all,the only thing that could happen is...being bombed,random terrorists-which I doubt- or thievery...you on the other hand... Ludwig:*smiling softly*Ich vill be fine.Eef jou vant,Ich kould ask mein bruder to ztay mit jou.He ist nice. me:Oh,I didn't know you had a brother...I say you both stay here,where it's safe... Ludwig:*putting his jacket on my shoulder*Let mich valk jou home* me:Won't you be cold? Ludwig:*smiling*Ich is used to harsher vinters zhan zhis one. 
We started slowly walking home,as I was hugging his jacket closer to me,and subtly tried to hold his hand,but it just brushed past it,and I got embarrassed and looked away,blushing,just like he did. After some seconds,I felt my hand warm and I look down...he was holding my hand...our fingers interwined together and he was blushing,looking away. Holding with my other hand on the ends of the jacket,I giggle softly and held his hand tighter,enjoying the nice warm feeling that I was getting from this. Unfortunately,after some,we have arrived in front of my door... 
me:*blushing**smiling*So um...see you...tomorrow?Maybe? Ludwig:*blushing awkwardly**looking away*Ja...shure...Same place? me:At 2? Ludwig:*nodding*Zhat ist gut...ummm... 
He kept moving his glance from our holding hands,then away,then back to me,and away again,anxiously.Looking slightly confused at him,I hold his other hand soflty,trying to get his attention. 
me:Ludwig...?Are you okay? He slowly averted his eyes at me,and I saw he was blushing madly,which I found very adorable. 
me:Luddy..?You are so adorable when you blush..*giggle*Ginger! Ludwig:*Wide eyed*S-S/O!Don't zay zhat! 
I grinned as I cupped his face with my hands and got closer to him and he was looking at me wide eyed and embarrassed. Then,next thing I know,I feel his warm lips on mine,his hands holding mine,and I was engulfed in a very warm aura,as I felt butterflies and sparks among us. me:*blushing**looking down*T-that... Ludwig:Vas...*blushing worse* -?-:SO ADORABLE!!! 
I and Ludwig stared at each other in shock,then blushed madly and looked away from each other,as I saw my appartment's door open,and a clapping Lucy on staying on the frame,giggling. 
me:L-Lucy!?W-what are you doing here?!You are supposed to...be sleeping! Lucy:*pouting*Buuuuut!!It's not even late!!Me and mum were making you a birthday gift!!*gasp**slapping her tiny hands over her mouth*Oops...I shouldn't have said that... me:*smiling softly**ruffling her hair*Thank you,sweetheart.*putting my pointer finger at my lips*Shhh.It's our little secret,okay? Lucy:*giggling*Yaaay!!!Hey,Ludwig!Her birthday is (y/bday)!Don't forget that,for your own good!!Or else,you will have to face my anger!!*jumping on him*RAWR!!! 
As I was laughing,Ludwig caught her midair and chuckled at her childishness.Lucy on the other hand,was trying to bite his arm,but with no success. 
me:Okay,Lucy,that's enough,don't be a parasite! Lucy:I'm not a parasite!I'm a puppy!Woof!Woof!Hey Ludwig,do you like dogs?S/O loves dogs!She always wanted one,but we couldn't afford one!I want a puppy too!But I like tiny,playful and fluffy ones,unlike her!She likes BIG and STROOONG dogs!Shepards,German Shepards and...and...I DON'T KNOW DOGS!!*pouts*Oh WAIT! I WANT A DALMATIAN!! 101 OF THEM!! And I will name 2 of them Pongo and Perdita!! Oh,wait!Until then,YOU TWO CAN BE PONGO AND PERDITA!!Or....Or...LADY AND THE TRAMP!! 
She was talking with such enthusiasm,that I had to cover my mouth to stiffle my laughs.It was kinda embarrassing,but Ludwig's red face was really adorable! 
Lucy:Ludwig!Hey Ludwig!Can you buy us puppies on our birthday?!Heeeey....WHY IS YOUR FACE SO RED,GINGER??ARE YOU COLD?!*gasp*COME INSIDE!YOU WILL CATCH A COLD!! Ludwig:N-nein..Ich bin gut... Lucy:Huh?*cute confused puppy face* me:He said "No,I'm fine”...which it's obvious it's not true *chuckling* 
He is doomed.We started dragging him inside,in the slightly warm appartment. me:It's not much,but it's home.
Ludwig:Eet eez nice... Lucy:MUMMY!!MUMMY!!S/O’s BOYFRIEND IS HERE!! me:W-w-what?!*blushing madly* mum:*coming in*Oh,how wonderful!Young love~ me:M-mum....don't say that.. mum:Oh,I'm sorry,dear.What is your name,darling? Ludwig:Ich bin Ludvig...Eet eez..um...ein honour to meet jou,Mrs.(L/N) mum:Oh,you're so formal,don't be!There's no need to!Make yourself at home.Are you hungry?Or thirsty? Ludwig:Nein,danke..um...*phone ringing*Oh,eet eez mein bruder.Excuse mich please. 
He started talking to his brother and mum and Lucy came at me,with a knowing look. 
mum:Nice one.Got yourself a keeper*wink* Lucy:It's AAAAAALLLLLL thanks to ME! me:Mum...he didn't ask me out yet,okay?Chill,you guys... Lucy:But you KISSED! me:*facepalming*Lucy!Shut it!...You...*giggling*really embarrassed him a lot though...that was funny... Ludwig:Vell...mein bruder zaid Ich should go home. me:*nodding*Okay,let me get you to the door. 
We went outside,then we looked at each other and smiled. 
me:So,see you tomorrow? Ludwig:Ja...Good bye. me:*smiling*Bye! 
As I turned to go back inside,I felt Ludwig grab my wrist.
 me:Huh?What is it,Luddy? Ludwig:Ich...um...Do jou...vant to...um...be mein....girlfriend? me:*blushing slightly*Of course I do!*grinning* 
He smiled,then I got on my tippy toes and kissed him soflty,which shocked him,then winked at him and went back inside,waving at him,saying"Bye,Ginger!",seeing him still shocked,but with a happy glint in his eyes. Once inside,my sister and mum were looking at me with a smug-knowing face.I went past them,stopped midway to my room,then looked past my shoulder with a big smirk and said. 
me:Oh and,only I can call my boyfriend "Ginger",okay,kiddo?*wink* 
 ~December 24th~ 
This morning,my sister gave me the necklace Ludwig gave her,saying that "I'm the one that should have it" So of course now I'm wearing it all day. So!Right now I'm doing the Christmas shopping. Some sweets,some crisps,some snacks,some fruits,some toys,some clothes,parfume,accessories...all in all,I managed to fuck all the money I managed to get this year. But it's fine,at least it's for a good cause. Too bad they are very heavy though...for fuck's sake...
-?-:Hey,frau,vait a zekond! 
I looked back to see a soldier,with silvery-white short hair,ruby eyes and a small bird on his cap.He had the same necklace as Ludwig...could he mean..this is his brother?Or do all German soldiers wear that necklace as a part of their uniform? 
-?-:Hey,frau!Vhere'd jou get zhat necklace from? me:Ermh...someone gave me this....why? -?-:Are jou mein bruder's girlfriend? me:Ludwig,you mean?  -?-:Ja!Ich bin Gilbert,his avezome elder bruder!Kesesese!Lemme help you vith zhose,right,Gilbird? Girlbird:Tweet! I started laughing at the little bird and let Gilbert help me with the bags,and started walking home. Gilbert:Zo,S/O...how's mein little bruder? me:*confused*What...do you mean...? Gilbert:...Jou know.Eez he treating jou alright?Do jou love him...jou know,Ich bin ein worried bruder...Jou're zhe first perzon he haz ever loved...und he eez avkvard... me:*chuckling*Nooo he's good,he's good,don't worry.He's a sweetheart....*smirking*Ginger...that's his new nickname...*laughing* Gilbert:*smiling* Vhy? me:Because he's always blushing when I get close to him.and his face goes really red...so Ginger!! Gilbert:*Smirk*Kesesesese!!!Danke,frau!Now ich know vhat to kall him from now on!!! me:*shaking my head*But...he's an awesome person.Really nice,caring and kind...Say...Gilbert... Gilbert:*smiling*Vhat eez eet? me:Why...do you 2 have to go...in the main fight?I mean...what if you die!I don't want that to happen!Ludwig and you are the best things that happened in my life...I'd hate to lose you guys too... Gilbert:*hugging me*Zhis eez our duty...az much az ve hate eet...ve must...but ve vill have to go after mid January,zo don't vorry! me:Oh Gils...Why must there be war...wars are stupid...This has been going on for far to long!It's longer than the last WW2~! Gilbert:Ich know....Ich know...but ve kant change how zhings are... me:*sighs*True...you and Ludwig are just soldiers..and Im even less of an important person... Gilbert:....vell.....eet eez not quite the situation..Ich guess Ludvig didn't tell jou yet.. me:huh?Tell me what? Gilbert:...Eet eez not mein job to tell jou...ask him vhen jou zee him today or tomorrov....Eet eez quite ein important... me:....Gil...you kinda scare me now... Gilbert:Ahhh*awkward laugh*,neeeeiiiin!!Ich bin zorry!Ich din't mean eet like zhat!Eet eez really not zhat bad,jou just have to find out. me:Mhmhhhmm....fiiiineeeee....I'll just have to wait then... 
~~~~Timeskip~~~~In front of my house~~~~ 
me:Thanks a lot,Gils~.Means a lot to me-- Lucy:*opening the door*SANTA?!?!!? me:Oh no... Lucy:*jumping on him*MUM!!!MUM!!!SANTA REALLY CAME THIS TIME!!!I TOLD YOU!!! Mum:*coming out*What are you...-Oh S/O!And...you are...? Gilbert:Ich bin Zanta,ov kourze!Kesesesese!Und Gilbird eez mein kleine helper!! me:*whispering to her*Ludwig's older brother. 
I quickly ran in the house with all the bags,and put them under the little tree,got the Santa hat and put it on Gil's head.Perfect Santa... Lucy:LET'S OPEN THE GIFTS!! me:W-wait a second,Lucy!Shouldn't we be all here? Lucy:What do you..---OH!!!YES!!HOW COULD I FORGET GINGER?!GO CALL HIM NOW!! me:*rolling my eyes*Oh,sheesh,kid....
I tell them to go inside and wait for me 5 minutes,and I call Ludwig~ me:Hey,Luddy~How are you? Lud:Hallo,liebling.Ermh...vell...Ich vas actually...koming to zee jou.... me:That's perfect!I actually called you so you'd come at mine!Tonight's Christmas and all~ Lud:*chuckle*Zuch ein coincidence~ me:I think not!!!hahaha!!! 
As I saw him,I hanged up and jumped on him,hugging him tightly,as he held me in his warm embrace,kissing me. 
me:Gingeeeer~!!You're so adorable!!! Lud:*looking in the other direction*Don't kall mich zhat.... me:*taking his hand*Come on!Santa came*wink* Lud:Zanta...? me:Gilbert.We met when I was struggling to carry the bags home,so when we arrived in front of my door,Lucy the Troublemaker came out and yelled "SANTA!!!" and jumped on him.Poor guy....I pity your brother*laughing* Lud:*chuckling**shaking his head*Gilbert.... me:Oh that's right.He said you wanted to tell me something very important about you and him.So?What is it? Lud:*looking away*.....vell....eet eez kind ov delikate und...vell...ich underztand eef jou won't vant to be around mich anymore und... me:*cupping his face*Luddy...you scare me...just tell me what it is.Come on,I promise I will never leave you alone,no matter what. Lud:*sigh**looking down*.....Ich bin......ein.....kountry.....Ich bin Germany (DOITSU!!!!) me:Huh?What do you mean? Lud:Ich know.....Ich know eet zoundz zo veird und unbelievable...but...eet eez true...Ich bin Deutschland...Und Gilbert eez Preussen...und zhat eez vhy ve have to go und fight een zhe main battles.Bekause ve kant die me:You....really mean it...? Lud:....Ja...Und...ich underztand eef-- 
I hugged him really tightly,surprising him. 
me:Luddy,I love you,okay?I don't care what or who you are.I love YOU!okay?Du bist mein liebe und mein hertz!Und ich liebe dich fur immer jetzt!Okay?Never forget that! Lud:S/O... me:Shut it,Ginger!We have some gifts to open!We left Santa deal with the little parasite for far too long.*wink* 
I dragged the still shocked Ludwig inside the house,so when she saw him,Lucy jumped on Ludwig too yelling "GINGER!!!" 
Lud:Not you too... Gilbert:But Vest,zhat nickname zuitz jou perfektly!Kesesesese! me:See!Everybody likes your nickname~! Lud:Vhatever... Lucy:DOWN!NOW!!WE HAVE GIFTS!!! me:Pfffff kiddo.Fine,you share the gifts.Go on,then! Lucy:Woo!!!So many!!!I've been good,right Santa?! Gil:Ja!Jou have been ein very guy kid! Lucy:This one is for....mummy!! mum:*shocked*me?! Lucy:Yes!Here!It's written M-U-M-M-Y!!Thats Mummy!!You! mum:*glancing at me*So;what did I get then?*smiling* me:*smiling*I don’t know,mum.Shred the wrapping and look in the box.It's yours after all. Lucy:Yes!!Sis is right! 
Mum took the gift,undid the wrapping carefully and neatly,earning a bored sigh from Luce,and opened the box.Inside there was a new casual,dark green dress.Her favourite colour.On her birthday,I bought her a pair of black shoes and a dark-green jewelry set. Not very expensive but just her style.Elegant. She was stunned-again.I knew she loved it,which made me smile even more. Seeing her smile is what brings my happiness again.Hers and Lucy's. 
Mum:*smiling**glancing at me*Thank you,Santa... 
I nodded in her direction,then Lucy humfed and got another gift. Lucy:Not again!This isnt mine!Hmpf!....Oh!Ginger!!This is yours!!To think Santa knew you would be here with us!!!Here!!Open it!! 
Luddy grabbed the box gingerly(pffff no pun intended at all) and opened it.Inside,there was a dark green scarf and a silver necklace with a dog and a (fave/animal) on it.He blushed and looked at me,then in the opposite direction.This made me smile and look down blushing,while mum was giggling,Lucy was confused and Gilbert was laughing at us. me:Oh,will you 2 just shut up?!Continue with the presents!  Lucy:But Ginger has to thank Santa first!  Lud:*glancing at me**eye twitching at "Ginger"*Danke....Zanta...*facepalm*  Gilbert:Kesesesese!!Du bist wilkommen!  Lucy:Okay okay!Enough!Next one is...OH MY GOD!!IT'S FINALLY MINE!!!*shredding it**gasp*It's GORGEOUS!!! 
She got a pink princess dress,like Rapunzel's,a tiara and a pair of golden flats.In the other box she got a pair of pink mittens,a white beanie and a purple scarf. She was so happy,she was screaming and crying around the house,then jumped on Gilbert yelling "Thank you" a thousand times. me:What are you waiting for,silly?!Go try it on!! The moment she ran in her room,I started tearing up of happiness.I'm really happy that she's happy. 
Gilbert:*smiling at me*Nice job,frau. mum:*hugging me*I will never be able to repay you for everything...it should have be- me:Mum..do me a favour...and shut up.*hugging her*Enjoy the dress,and on my birthday,I will take you out*wink**wiping her tears*We are here for each other.Only one of us,alone,can't do much,but together...you saw the happiness in her eyes,so we will be okay*smile* Mum:Thank you so much...Santa...*wink* me:Good!*clapping hands together*Now,if you don't mind....I'm hungry...so... Mum:Sandwiches it is!*going in the kitchen* Lud:*hugging me*Danke,liebling...Danke...jou didn't ha- me:Oh,shut it,okay?...Mh...hey Gils... Gilbert:Ja? me:I'm sorry...  Gilbert:Huh?What for? me:.....I didn't get you a gift.... Gilbert:*laughing*Don't vorry,frau!....Zhe fact zhat jou make Vest happy eez zhe best gift ever!  Lud:Um...S/O... me:Hm? Lud:Komm here ein bit. me:*going in front of him*What is it? Lud:*hugging me tightly*Ich liebe dich...zo much...bitte...never leave mich... me:Luddy....Of course I won't... 
I put my hand on his head,stroking his hair softly,then I kissed him softly. me:I love you too much to let go... 
Lud:Zhen...*standing on his knee*Vill you promise to marry mich,vhen zhe var eez over? me:....Yes...Yes!Yes!!Yes I will! 
He was smiling brightly at me and picked me up from my waist,me hugging his neck,he twirled me around and then kissed me lovingly and passionately. We both had tears in our eyes,from happiness,then I heard clapping before us,and we saw Gilbert clapping and Gilbird tweeting. 
Gilbert:Kesesesese!!!Zhis vas zooo avezome!!!Now ich have ein little schwester!S/O Beilschmidt! 
I was blushing faintly,but laughing heartly,'til I heard mum coming in the room with the sandwich tray. Mum:What was with all the laughing and cheering? me:Well,basically- Gilbert:S/O AND LUDWIG ARE GETTING MARRIED!! me:Pretty much. mum:Okay.*putting the tray in Gilbert's hand*OH MY GOD THIS IS AMAZING!!*hugging me and Lud tightly**mother rantings* me:Ooookaaaayyy...Caaalm down now,mum! mum:*crying*BUT THIS IS AWESOME NEWS!! me:Yeah...I know...but you're going to wake up the dead,with your yelling. mum:Okay.Okay.I'm good now.but still....OMG!! me:MUM! mum:*smiling innocently*Okay fine. Lucy:*running*STOP LAUGHING AND YELLING WITHOUT ME!! mum:Lucy,it's not nice to yell. me:*snort*look who's talking...  Mum nudged me,giggling. Lucy:I demand you tell me what is going on RIGHT NOW!! me:Ginger and Santa are going to be our new relatives. Lucy:Huh?!HOW?! me:Ginger and I are getting married. Lucy:WHAT?! me:*groan*how many times do I have to repeat the same thing to only 2 PERSONS?! Mum:*chuckling*S/O and Ludwig are gettin married.You can be a princess at their wedding! Lucy:No I can't! mum:Why? Lucy:Because sis gets to be the princess at her wedding! me:*giggling*That was so adorable!! Lucy:Thank you.Thank you.But do you know what's even better?! me:Amaze me. 
She pointed above my head and I saw...mistletoe...Ludwig blushed and I was like "Oh fuck it" and I cupped his face,kissing him once again,leaving him dazed again. We started laughing at his red,shocked face,which became quite a habit,and I started thanking dad for watching over us all this time.
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liu-lang · 7 years
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mental health & job stuff - tw: eating disorders, anxiety, sexual assault, self harm 
this week has been difficult. on tuesday and thursday, I saw my new therapist and psychiatrist respectively. 
the moment i saw my therapist’s office, i had reservations on whether she could relate to me. she was a white woman, perhaps in her 30s who was wearing one of those ... convertible skirts ?... you know the one where you can wear as a skirt with a foldable waist band thing tt also can be worn as a tube top dress. i just google’d convertible skirt and patanogia came up (white ppl who have the luxury of time and money to go camping in the summer brand). her office smelt like one of those autumn-scented candles. she had a chakra wall hanging / scroll thing. the appointment started off pretty open-ended. i think she was trying to give me ~space~ to open up so that the conversation flowed naturally. but i just felt kinda lost bc it took me months through 2 clinics and 3 intake appts to finally see her. @ tt point, i’m tired of hearing “so tell me why you’re here today” .... my scepticism increased exponentially  when she recommended practising yoga, being present and mindfulness training. honestly, idk why she works there ? bc she’s serving patients seeking treatment through the LA County Department of Mental Health. considering the issues they face and their lived experiences and socioeconomic status, i don’t think following a 10-min yoga lesson through an app (she seriously tried to recommend an app to me) is gonna make a difference. anyway, my next appt is in another 3 weeks. 
my psychiatrist is an older Filipino women, maybe in her 40s or 50s ... and the way she talks kinda reminds me of my mum (who is a big trigger for me). she asked lots of racially microaggressive questions before reading my file. really reminds me of how my mum exotifies my sisters and i for being mixed. i had to repeat details about my race, country i grew up and family structure a lot. she asked about my religious beliefs and i affirmed that i still identify as a muslim then she asked me if all muslim women have to go through female genital mutilation (there is a history of FGM in my family) ... and just, i can’t. her question came out more as a statement that she wanted me to confirm. i had to explain how it’s more of a mix of sociocultural factors than religious practise, tt not every muslim woman is subjected to it and there is an international response to educate these communities on its harmful effects. 
she also brought up the sexual assault tt happened when i was in high school. i alr felt distrustful and uncomfortable @ tt point ... i couldn’t make myself refer to him as a paedophile. she asked me who was this man and i just like... lost for words ? felt too ashamed ? ... i’m really stuck on how i couldn’t just refer to him for what he was. i guess i do have lots of lingering issues feeling like i am to blame for what happened. we also ran into some issues with my rx. my current pcp didn’t recommend me for my usual annual cardiology visit bc she believes i’ve been stable for a long enough time. but my psychiatrist strongly prefers if i can get an ECG. she did give me a rx for 10 mg lexapro though so... we’ll see how tt goes. i decided to finally seek medication because of my anxiety at work. i didn’t want it to affect my job performance. they also took my vitals ... the usual stuff, my blood pressure is low and i’m underweight. i need to go back for blood work on tuesday. 
speaking of job performance ... i went to a career fair at my alma mater. i had a federal work study position at the career development center as a communications assistant (basically a combo of outreach, distribution, marketing, social media management, data anallytics) so it was different to be on the other side of things. one of the employers present contacted me for an interview. the interview was successful and they extended me an offer. then they gave me the runaround for 2 weeks and i received an email yesterday rescinding the job offer. needless to say, i was blindsided. here’s the time line of events
10/19 thursday - attended job fair
10/20 friday - received a call to schedule an interview then an email confirmation for interview
10/24 tuesday - went in for interview (had to move my psychiatrist appt which essentially changed my psychiatrist so ... idk if i could have had a better fit. i’m miffed abt this.)
10/25 wednesday - phone call from HR offering me the position, they told me i could have until 10/30 to make a decision. they also said they wanted a 11/06 start date if possible. i told them i had to give 2 weeks notice at my current employer as proper protocol
10/27 friday - i rang HR and left a voicemail indicating i’d be interested and wanted to discuss benefits etc 
10/30 monday - i rang HR again and told them i had left them a message on friday and would love to hear back from them soon. no phone call back. in the afternoon, i sent an email to the recruiter i originally handed my resume to letting him know i’ve been unsuccessful in reaching the HR person and would appreciate an update. he rang me back assuring me the offer was still on the table and they would gladly have me and he would email me an official offer by the end of day, also stressed 11/06 start date and i again repeated the 2 weeks notice spiel and could HR send me a summary of the benefits 
11/01 wednesday - i ring HR and finally speak to the HR person. she didn’t receive any of my messages and the recruiter didn’t inform her of what i requested. she said she usually is not in the office mondays and fridays. she sounds in a hurry and is in the middle of doing payroll. i keep it short and express interest in accepting the offer. could i have summary of the health insurance plan and possibly negotiate a slightly higher salary ? she agrees to send me a official written offer by the end of the day or tomorrow. again they emphasise 11/06 start date... i’m like really confused but just repeat that i would love to start asap but also what about 2 weeks notice
11/02 thursday - i receive an email from HR rescinding the job offer with the explanation they had already filled in all the positions they were recruiting for. 
this post is getting super long. there were red flags abt this company from the beginning but i was holding out hope bc surely a university would have thoroughly vetted the employers they invite to a career fair. also bc i worked for the CDC and knew these employers & established a rapport through my position there. i’m still trying to process everything. i’m mostly crushed at the realisation tt i will have to work another black friday in retail. i would hear things abt ppl not being able to work bc of mental health issues. i nvr discredited them but i also didn’t really have a concept of it ? now i have a lived experience. it is tortuous having to think of slogging through another holiday season when i was so close to leaving. i had a co-worker who just left and we were congratulating each other on finally getting out. it feels so defeating and depressing to still be stuck / left behind. this feels so much worse than an outright rejection. added onto normal anxiety associated w/ the recent grad job hunt, now i’m catastrophising what if this happens with another potential employer ? i keep wondering about the reasons why they rescinded ? maybe i shouldn’t have negotiated ? maybe i should have just accepted when they rang - i didn’t have any other offers on the table... maybe i tried to get in touch with them too much ? maybe i didn’t pass the background check ? maybe something went wrong w/ my references ? ...even though they kept insisting on like an impossible start date plus never sending me an official offer therefore preventing me from resigning and agreeing to their start date. i kinda want to have a meeting with my ex boss to let her know about my experience and maybe get advice on um... being aware of warning signs to prevent this from happening again ? but i don’t want it to sound like i’m blaming the university for bringing on shady companies ... i know my experience is not reflective of everyone else’s. it’s hard not to internalise this and feel like there is something wrong with me. another thing is ... i have like no written evidence of everything in between so on email it just looks like i had an interview and then they rejected me. and my phone calls which they nvr answered looks like i was the one hounding them when ... understandably i wanted to move the hiring process along bc they were adamant on the 11/06 start date. i also needed the time to make the very big financial decision of buying a fucking car in order to get to work (the office is in orange county which has 0 convenient transport options esp. going btwn LA and orange counties) 
i’m really anxious abt having more allergic reactions at work - especially bc the managers now know. i have an appt with an allergist but it’s not until january. idk if my skin can survive. i can hide it when it’s on my body but lately it’s been flaring up on my hands - which i use to touch merchandise, handle money, stock shelves, build displays ... just lots of touching and hand contact with possible allergens. i cried in the car after work yesterday and have been battling thoughts of self harm since wednesday. sigh... i’ll have to call this afternoon asking for next week’s work schedule at the store. tt familiar feeling of being overwhelmed and wanting everything to stop is coming back. 
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babylon-bitch · 7 years
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Just Friends ~ Filled With Guilt And Sadness (part 30)
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*trigger warning*
A/N: depression and self harm is something I’ve suffered with throughout the years. I didn’t just add that into the story for story or romantic purposes, I’ve suffered with it couple of years. I’m a lot better and happier now than I ever have been, and I’m so greatful for the people around me, as well as this whole community. I included this aspect of life into the story to raise awareness to the subject and to help people who are suffering right now. An important message: it does get better, it may not feel like it, just trust me. Give yourself some time, surround yourself with great people or get rid of the people that are making your life a dark misery. Please feel free to come talk to me about anything on your mind.
Harper White is best friends with Luke Hemmings, they always have been. Not only is she friends with the rockstar, but with the rest of 5 Seconds Of Summer, as well as a really nice girl named Erika.
Harper has a few secrets, she can play all the instruments the boys play and many more. It’s a talent she has kept hidden, only very few people know.
What will happen to the six teens, wondering around the world together?
Warnings: mentions of depression, self harm, swearing
***
I can’t do this anymore. I’m fucking miserable, I feel like I take the life out of every room when I walk in. I feel like I will never be happy again. Everything is so dull and everything aches. It’s like I want to get up but don’t have the energy or I can’t get motivated. A couple of weeks ago, the Sun was finally coming out again, but it’s gone back to dreary grey days. I don’t know if I can go on.
I’ve been in England for about a week and a bit. I’ve gone and seen the therapist Lauren told me about, and she is a really kind person. I love it but at the same time I absoloutly hate it. She helps me but as soon as I step out the building, everything sinks again. I had one other therapist in my life but he didn’t really know what he was doing, and my mum dragged me to go see him when he did fuck all.
I’ve gone and looked at universities whilst I’ve been here, got my eye set on a couple. I visited my brothers and Evie the other day whilst I was looking around a university, not the same one though, they were in the same area whilst I was on my way, popped over to their apartments and we caught up for a while. Evie did the loudest squeal when I told her about me and Luke, I think I’ve gone partially deaf in one ear.
The guys come home today I think, and I feel guilty that I’m not gonna be there. I know, I just know Luke is going to be bursting with excitement, but then when he finds out his best friend isn’t going to be their he will be a little upset. I think he knows I’ve done a ‘runner’, I think Luke has a clue where I am, but I’m not entirely sure.
I miss him so much. I knew I’d miss him but I didn’t think this much. It feels like he is the only one that can help me and I feel like he knows that.
I’m planing on going back home soon, I’m just trying to brace myself for the interrogation, especially if the boys are back. They all have a right to question me, I get that, I’m just not prepared.
Would it be bad if I got home and didn’t say anything for a couple of days?
It’s been alright here though, seeing family again, that made a real smile form on my face.
When we all got home from the club the other day, we stayed at my house and I had one of the worst hangovers ever. I literally drank all my problems away. I didn’t get a tattoo this time though. We ended up doing a pub crawl and that really wasn’t wise. I’m surprised my legs haven’t fallen off from all the grinding I did, I didn’t grind with other people, just Delilah and Laura, and a couple of times with Elliot.
I did some bad stuff that night, I did some drugs, some I don’t even know what they were. Just anything to escape from reality, but it was only like fog. Yeah, the drugs had their effects, but I didnt quite escape from reality. I could still sense reality, it was like a fog blanket but I could still see through it, and that made me go onto the more hard-core stuff.
The others did it with me, so I wasn’t just on my own, going on a wild goose chase. I was in a pretty bad shape for the next couple of hours.
I haven’t become some drug addict, that was just a one off and I don’t plan on doing anymore anytime soon.
It wasn’t my best moment.
I’m currently round Lauren’s house, once again. Of course I didn’t tell her what I did, I told her I went for a night out and that’s all she knows. She might’ve told my parents and I would never be allowed to come back on my own for a while.
Understandably so.
“So I was thinking of going back home soon.” I claim.
“Oh really? When?” She questions.
“Next few days probably, I’ve had my time and its not fair to leave my friends out of the loop, especially Luke.” I tell her.
“Are you ready?” She asks.
“I haven’t really got a choice, I’ve got school. I already feel bad for not being there when the guys come home today. Should I feel this guilty?”
“Honey, I’ve told you this before, and I’m gonna tell you again, put yourself first!” She chuckles.
“I can’t, but I’m alright with it.” I shrug.
“Okay, but just keep that advice.” She smiles.
“Yeah, well it’s Friday now, I’ll probably leave tomorrow evening.” I explain.
“Alright, do you want me to drop you off at the station?” She offers.
“Oh that would be great! Thank you.” I give her a small smile.
“Anytime,” Lauren smiles, “What time is your flight?”
“I was looking at some this morning, there’s one at 8:25. You have to be at the airport 3 hours prior on a long haul flight, it takes an hour to get from Brighton to London, so we’ll have to leave at half three to get to the station in time. Ugh traveling is so stressful.”
“Looks like you’ve got it all planned out then,” Lauren says. “When is the next time you’ll visit?”
“I don’t know, maybe in a couple of months, I might have some uni stuff to sort out.”
“Are you sure that’s the one you want to go to?” She questions.
“Yeah, nice area, one of the best in the country. I’m just not entirely sure if I want to study philosophy. It’s either philosophy or psychology, maybe even business studies,” I sigh. “All I’ve gotta do next is choose the right course and get the grades for it.”
“You would do good at philosophy I think, but I’m not exactly sure what you can do with that degree.”
“That’s what stumped me, of course there are things you can do with it, but nothing I’m interested in. I’m not even sure if I will do anything with my degree, I’ll probably just carry on with YouTube.” I explain.
“Who says you even have to go?”
“My parents, I don’t want to disappoint them, although I kinda already have.” I say.
“How?” She questions.
“I’m fucked up. A lot more fucked up than they think.” I shrug.
Luke’s p.o.v.
We are heading home today, and I’m excited to come home and see everyone. Also at the same time I’m worried as shit.
Harper.
Just one word to explain it all. I’m worried about her and I’m worried about our relationship.
I highly doubt that she’ll be here, but a part of me hopes it’ll be like some clichè romantic movie and she is actually there and we live happily ever after. It’ll never happen though.
We’ve all decided to meet up at Ashton’s house. All of our friends and family should be at Ashton’s house, so it’s just a little get together. Someone will be missing though.
Why am I so affected by this?
We’re currently on our way, just coming up Ashton’s road. “You ready boys?” Calum’s sister ask.
“Yep, thanks up for the lift Mali.” Ashton grins.
“Uh, just be prepared, all the mums are really excited.” She warns.
We all climb out the car and make our way up the driveway. Calum knocks on the door and it opens within seconds. “Mum!” Michael grins and hugs her.
“Hello.” She laughs and hugs him back.
The rest of us walk in and hug our own mums. “Everyone else is in the garden.” My mum tells us.
“I was gonna say, so much for a gathering.” Calum laughs.
I walk through to the kitchen and out the back door and into the garden, all of a sudden everyone cheers.
A smile makes its way on my face as I see everyone. “Guys!” Erika shrieks and throws herself at Ashton. He catches her and she wraps her legs around his waist while his arms go around her waist, they talk to each other for a couple of seconds before she detached herself and hugs Michael.
Soon enough she comes to me and I wrap my arms around her shoulders. “How have you been?” I ask.
“Alright, missed you guys though, how about you?” She asks.
“Okay I guess,” Erika gives me a sympathetic smile before hugging me again.
“Well, I better not hold you up, go say hello to everyone.” She says and pats me on the back.
“Speak to you later.” I smile and kiss her head.
I’ve said hello to everyone here and I’ve been having a great time, that one person didn’t show up though. I didn’t really expect any different to be honest. I just miss her so much, things aren’t the same without her.
We’re currently sitting in some chairs drinking some beers, thinking back the whole tour.
I’m going to miss it, I just have stuff to sort out.
I remeber when Harper and I sat on top of the roof, watching the sunset then all the stars. I just turned 17 a couple of days ago, she had her head resting on my shoulder and I had my arm around her. We had our hoodies over our knees because it was quite chilly.
I so very nearly kissed her that night. She was looking up at me so I looked down at her, as I turned our noses brushed and she giggled. My eyes trailed down to her lips then back up to her eyes, she definitely knew what I was looking at. I was about to lean in but I thought about all the possibilities that could go wrong. So I opted for just kissing her nose and then her cheek and she smiled.
I’m so in love with this girl.
***
It’s the next day now and I’m on my way to Harper’s house. She probably won’t be there but it’s worth a shot, plus I can talk to her parents.
Ringing the doorbell and then taking a step back. Sarah opens and sports a small smile.
“Oh, hello Luke! How was tour?” She asks as she brings me in for a hug.
“It was great thanks, how have you been?” I ask.
“Alright, yourself?”
“Um okay I guess.” I say and she gives me a sad smile.
“Well speaking about uh Harper, she is not here at the moment.” She tells me.
“That was exactly what I came over for,” I start off. “Could you tell me uh, about this whole situation?”
“Come in.” She gestures.
I walk past her and into the living room. Sarah sits on a different sofa to me and turns the tv off.
“It’s not really my place to say, love.” She sighs.
“What happened? Where is she?” I question.
“Everything all got a bit too much so she went away. She asked me not to tell anyone, you especially. I have no idea when she is going to come home.”
“But,” I groan. “Okay. Is she alright?”
“I honestly don’t know, she hasn’t spoken to me at all really.”
“When did she leave?” I question.
“Uh, she left a couple of days after she came home.” She claims.
“Could you tell me when she comes home?” I ask.
“Of course honey.” She smiles.
We continue to chat about it all, I feel as if I’m on a game show trying to find the answer.
“Goodbye Sarah.” I smile and pull her into a hug.
“Bye Luke, I’ll keep you updated. I am sorry though, don’t worry about her though, I’m sure she will be fine, she is surrounded by great people.” She says.
“I’ll try not to, but in the mean time, keep slaying Mrs. White.” I laugh and so does she.
“Okay, thanks Luke, tell your mum I said hi.” She calls as I make my way down the drive way.
I wave and smile at her and continue going home.
Harper’s p.o.v.
I’m on my way home right now, I’m walking up my road to my house, it’s really fucking long.
The journey was alright, nothing special, just filled with guilt and sadness. For some reason it was really hard to say goodbye this time, but that’s not where the sadness came from, I already had that, it only just piled on more.
It feels exactly like when I first arrived in england, clad in all black, the only colourful things is my bag where the leather straps are brown. I don’t usually bring that much stuff with me to england because I’ve got clothes and stuff already there.
It’s night time right now so everything is dark, only a few lampposts every now and then.
I’m scrolling through instagram right now and I accidentally like Luke’s post, shit. I hate when that happens. It was a picture of him and the rest of the boys, it’s a good picture, but I don’t know if you know this but I’m trying to keep everything on the down low.
Liking a picture wouldn’t do any harm.
Pocketing my phone and then crossing the road, passing Luke’s house. His light is still on and window is open.
I think I can hear him playing guitar, it’s a bit late for him to be up, it’s 3:35 in the morning. Maybe he has something on his mind.
Carrying on walking, I eventually get to my house. Searching my pockets for my keys, I find nothing but fabric. Patting all of my pockets I still can’t find them. Shrugging off my leather backpack and opening it up.
After checking my bag and double checking my pockets I conclude that I’ve left my keys in England.
Knocking on the door, I wait for someone to answer, after ten minutes of no answer, I take it as they are asleep.
Did I really not tell them I was coming home?
Time for some James Bond shit.
Shrugging my bag back on I start to climb over the gate that goes into the back garden. Swiftly jumping down without any trace of a sound. Trying the back door, that’s locked too.
Walking into the garden I look for possible ways to get in. There is a tree by the spare bedroom window, but I’m gonna have to take a leap of faith and then cling onto the window sill.
Worth a shot. Climbing the tree until I’m on the closest branch to the spare room. Here goes nothing, I jump off the branch and cling onto the window sill, hoisting myself up onto the thin and flimsy piece of plastic. Pushing the window open but it doesn’t budge. Trying the window next to it, it opens up.
I sigh with relief and crawl through the window, jumping down and onto the floor. I made it!
Trying not to wake my parents up, I tip toe through the landing, passing their room as well as others, I finally reach my bedroom. Opening it up a long creak comes out and I cringe before quickly shutting it close.
Running my hand through my hair and letting out a breathe. Everything has been cleaned up and tidied away - thanks mum - it smells great in here too. Shrugging off my bag and dropping it by my door.
I’m really thirsty so I open the door again and expertly miss the steps that creak. I know which ones to avoid because of the amount of times I’ve snuck out to meet Luke, my boyfriends, or all the guys and Erika. Usually to see Luke though.
I bring the Toblerone box and the few Whisper bars that I bought at the airport with me and place them on the island.
Grabbing a glass and filling it up with water and going back up to my room. Crawling into bed and relishing the smell of lemons.
***
The Sun blinds me as I open my eyes and shy away from it, causing me to pull my covers over my head.
Patting my bedside table for my phone and checking the time, 10:15. Deciding I should try and get back into the right timezone, I get up and start getting dressed.
A dark coloured flannel shirt, which is actually Luke’s, a shirt underneath the flannel and some black ripped jeans. I’ll probably wear some boots but for the mean time I’ve just got some trainer socks on.
I do my make up and hair, before go making my way down the stairs. I’m not sure if they know I’m home yet. They probably saw the Toblerone and Whisper bars and are a bit confused.
Well, here’s my chance to reveal myself.
“Morning.” I say.
My mum shrieks.
“Oh my goodness, Harper dear.” She places a hand on her heart.
“I’m home?” I give her a sheepish smile.
“When did you get here?” She questions.
“I’ve always been here what are you talking about?” I joke. “No, uh, I got here last night and I kinda left my keys back in the UK, so I had to do some parkour to get in. Where is dad?”
“He is at work. Why didn’t you just knock on the door?” She ask.
“You think I didn’t? I knocked for about ten minutes, but no answer so I went round the back, climbed the tree and climbed through the spare bedroom window.”
“Sorry about that,” she laughs. “How was it?”
“It was great but shit at the same time. Lauren told me to go to a therapist that helped her. That worked, until I left the building or for a couple of hours. I think I found the university I want to go to, I’ll tell you more about that when dad gets home. Went and visited Josh, Angus and Evie whilst I was looking at universities, caught up with them. Saw Laura and Delilah, as well as Delilah’s new boyfriend, we um, went for a night out, and that’s about it. It was a very chill visit, and I’m glad it was.” I explain.
We end up talking for a while about the whole visit, and her asking about so and so, just giving her a run down of it all.
Then she drops a bombshell.
“So Luke came over a couple of days ago.”
I freeze and my heart races. “Uh, right.” I nod.
“He’s worried about you, you should really go talk to him. At least tell him you’re safe.” She tells me.
“Forget it mum, I’m not talking to him just yet.” I snap.
“Well it was worth a shot.” She sighs and takes her coffee cup to the sink. “Bare it in mind.”
“Whatever.” I roll my eyes.
I’m gonna keep everything on the down low, for a couple of days at least. I’m just not ready to face their wrath.
I know that that’s a bit mean, but you can get why I’m doing it, right?
***
It’s a few of days later and I don’t think I’ve ever been this down before. It feels like the more I do, the more sad I get. It takes all my energy away from me. It takes so much for me to just get up. I haven’t gotten properly ready for the day in days, just a hoodie and some leggings. Haven’t eaten, slept or even thought properly in days.
I want to get better, but I can’t be bothered to.
I’ve had endless calls and texts from everyone and that makes it even worse. Everything is just eating me all up, I feel like I’m going insane.
How do you run from your own mind?
Thing is, no one knows, not even my parents. That is making it even harder, it’s like I’m going through this on my own.
My parents are out for dinner right now I think, so I’m all alone.
I can’t take this anymore, stepping up with shaky legs I walk into the bathroom. Desperately pulling all the draws out before I find what I need. Looking down at the mess I’ve made of the bathroom, all the draws pulled out, some cleaning products and shower stuff.
Opening up the box of razor blades and taking out one.
Looking at myself in the mirror, with the blade in hand. Tears running down my face, everything shaking, knees weak.
Bringing my arm up and tracing the scars that are already there with my fingers.
Why am I this fucked up?
Puncturing my flesh with the corner of the blade and harshly sucking in a breathe.
Slowly dragging the blade across my skin as I sob and curse my self.
Cut after cut it still isn’t doing anything for a minute. It’s like a really shit drug, it only has its effect for a few seconds before there’s just a mess.
Bringing the blade to my arm again and going in deep and feeling my tears falling onto my arm.
Throwing the whole box across the room in frustration. “FUCK!” I scream.
Suddenly feeling lightheaded and my eyesight goes all fuzzy.
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cancerfear · 7 years
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What is cancer? This is the question everyone is asking him/herself. There are many biological definitions of the different kinds of cancer. In some countries it has become so rampant that it’s declared a national disaster. I have experienced cancer second hand and I would like to explain what it really is in lay man’s language. Have you watched the series Chasing life? It’s and educational series about cancer and also a bit dramatic on life experiences. That would make you understand a lot of things which you probably did not know. Anyway that’s besides the point I want to make so back to business. It’s 6th of December 2016.My mum is unable to breathe at around 1.00a.m and she is rushed to hospital. The first aid is not working so the doctor tells me that they are putting her on ventilator in the ICU. My sisters are frustrated and don’t know what to do because it’s really expensive to even think about it. I give myself hope and say to myself that everything will be okay. I try to stay positive as much as possible. My first day at the hospital is spent at the cancer care block with my sisters, I see cancer patients going in for treatment some for chemotherapy and others for radiation. My sister could recognize some of the patients because she had meet them during her trips taking mum for treatment there. Some were so weak that they could not walk on there own after treatment. It was was visiting time and I had to go and check up on mum. Am a bit scared for I have never been to an ICU block before plus I didn’t want to see her in that condition .My nephew and I gather the courage to go in. He is one funny guy somehow so he would make some funny comment to keep our cool. It’s at night we have to go home with hope that her breath will be restored. The night seems quite long with a lot of thoughts flowing in my head. I have to keep cool because tomorrow is another long day . A week passes on there is still no improvement. Everyday I spent in the hospital I got to learn about humility and appreciating life a notch higher. Most of my days in the hospital we spent at the faraja Library where I would read more about cancer or just sit down and watch the number of cancer patients relaxing there. There was this old woman whom I got to meet, she had undergone her therapy for the day and she was waiting to regain some energy to go home. Another lady who was just sited next to me asked her asked whether she had someone to accompany her home. Her response was that it’s only her and her son where by her son has to work to pay the medical bills. So she usually manages on her own. I was really scared for her because she could barely walk home, but all this was for the treatment that someday she will get better and her life would be back to normal. That is one of the many stories that you get to see for yourself in that building. The second week as am scrolling down my phone, my mum’s contacts pops up and then it hit me that I really want to call her so that I could hear her sweet voice again. So that I could tell her how much I love her and how she could always reply I love you too. I really cried my heart off but I had to be strong for her. The doctor advised us to authorize them to carry out a procedure to put a tracheostomy tube so that we could take her home and it would be easier to manage that with the help of a critical care nurse. We agree to that as a family and the procedure is done. We buy the necessary equipments required for this type of care and wait as we look for the final things like a portable ventilator which was very difficult to get. It’s the 3rd week and my mum really wants to go back home. She is tired of staying in a hospital bed she just wishes that her life would go back to normal this is because all my life I have never seen her sick in bed. She was such a strong lady and she actually tried even harder this time to get better . It was frustrating for us to. Finally she could be discharged when we had all the equipments and the nurse ready. This was the fourth week when she was discharge. When she was brought home and she could see her grandchildren she was really happy and she could even afford a smile. That really warmed my heart after a really long time. Unfortunately she did not even finish a week at home she passed on which was really painful. I was so positive that she would get better someday. If it was not for the good friends who held our back and God’s grace my sisters and I would have died of stress and some trauma. Some of this friends would not be there physically but they would at least call each single day to comfort us and give us hope. The friends who would walk the journey with us to the end. We did not end up being depressed because we were there for each other. We talk to each other so that we will not end up being depressed. A thank you may not be enough for this kind of friends all we can do is just to pray for them. That is just a little bit of what people go through. Some are so deep and personal that I could not share. In Kenya it is so expensive to be sick especially being diagnosed with cancer that a friend of mine on a lighter note told me that we will sell our house for treatment. But seeing someone you love so much going through a lot of pain when you can hardly help them is traumatizing, all you can do is just giving them positive talks which sometimes they don’t want to hear about and praying for them. It is so painful that one may think you are the one in pain. After that comes the fear of whether you can genetically acquire cancer because a close member of the family suffered from it. We are too scared that we want to believe every article about cancer without even filtering what is actually real and what is not. We want to be ‘safe’ free of the disease . At least before you write something be considerate of this group of people who are desperate to get well someday. At least weigh what you are sharing. Is it really the truth or you just want to get some popularity out of it. Before we share and forward the numerous messages about cancer some of which are about some theories on WhatsApp at least read and filter this things before sharing because they will end up in the hands of this group of people. We were given the ability to reason as humans. So we are supposed to reason before we share. We should at least try to change our lifestyle this is through the food we eat. We should pledge to all have small kitchen gardens to plant the few things we consume on daily basis. We don’t need to have a small garden with actually soil on the ground to make this happen. Let’s plant them on our balconies or just outside our houses using buckets or sacks. This is due to the number of pesticides we consume on our foods because they are grown for commercial needs or reasons . Let’s go natural and try to adopt the lifestyle our great grandfather’s and grandmother’s used to live as Africans and we will avoid the numerous diseases of our age. At last put your trust in God, It’s a beautiful new day so live it to the fullest don’t let tomorrow’s battle destroy the today that you have.
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