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whetstonefires · 8 months

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“The Justice League and the Avengers are very different teams”

In what respect? Like, how would you say both teams differ in terms of overall function, how they respond to threats, how they’re viewed by their respective publics, etc?

😂 who even are you?

anyway, these two teams have been reformed and rebooted so many times and are the flagships of the two juggernauts of their industry, so their natures have evolved and influenced one another heavily over the decades as you see armies tend to do in prolonged warfare, so there is probably not one single statement you could make about either one that's always true.

it would be crazy to try to explain the difference in diegetic terms, because those aren't goalposts they're hockey pucks. the difference in kind exists at a publishing level.

fundamentally, the Avengers was designed to rest, in narrative terms, on everyone's personal relationships and neuroses, and develop soap opera subplots and office drama around how these intersected with each other and various villains. because in the 60s Marvel was launching the Big New Thing which was heightened naturalism and relatability in comics.

(spiderman and the whole genre of underdog superhero who can't catch a break rather than slyly winking at the audience as the world looks down on his secret identity, not knowing how impressive he really is, dates to this pivot of Marvel's. both Superman and Captain America did the latter in their early days, which is highly dissonant from Cap and Bucky looking at them today, but Cap was retired from print for like 20 years and got heavily rebooted for the new age.)

they had an actual mansion they could all live in, and many of them did, for a solid chunk of time early on. there's a reason people swung so hard for the 'everyone lives in stark tower' scenario foreshadowed at the end of Avengers (2012)--that's how the Avengers are! you bang the action figures together and give them angst and bonding about it!

they fractured repeatedly under the weight of all that drama (because psychology and because stories that don't end are unable to make any narrative sense, and breaking up a team is honestly a half-decent substitute in the Eternal Now of big comics) and at this point the current avengers is much more impersonal and even pays salaries, like basically the commune-underwritten-by-rich-buddy has reincorporated as an NGO.

but it still runs on the same types of narrative tensions mostly--huge epic stuff will be happening, but the Avengers tension comes down to whether everyone really hates T'Challa this month for that thing he did. and what this is doing to group cohesion.

the Justice League on the other hand was not built for character-driven story.

they've done plenty of them, after it became the done thing, and even imitated the Avengers and did the diegetic collapsing and reforming arcs and so on. but it's not fundamental to how a Justice League runs; you could do a super long run where the interpersonal tensions never rose above B-plot status and it wouldn't be tonally dissonant.

it would be weird for many of the Justice League to live together--when a character is shown living in Justice League facilities it is usually to signify that they are isolated and don't have a life and this is Bad. the Martian Manhunter and Maxwell Lord dominated era was deliberately aping the Avengers imo and came out weird as a result, and Lord turning out to be a mind-controlling supervillain was not unrelated to how weird most people felt it was.

the Justice League is like. joining a club rather than a frat. like being on the board of an NGO, rather than taking a full-time job there.

you know? the type of commitment is different. the level of intimacy is different.

cap and iron man's relationship has generally played out primarily in the context of their positions within the Avengers, even though it spills into their own titles, while superman and batman have had entire joint books just for them, and their friendship has not usually been allowed to take up much page time in Justice League issues. because that would be indecorous.

commercially speaking, Justice League is first and foremost an easy-buy showcase for high-profile hero characters and anyone you want to burnish up by displaying adjacent to them.

They've totally gotten messy with it over the years but like. I think the seminal Justice League internal dramas were 1) that time Barry Allen killed the guy who'd killed his first wife and was about to kill his second one and they put him on trial 2) that time Wonder Woman killed a dude who told her under truth compulsion that the only way to stop him from mind-controlling Superman to murder people was to kill him and they put her on trial 3) blah blah Batman paranoia exploited by eeeeevil (barely counts imo) and 4) that extremely oogy time it turned out the Justice League had been using magic to forcible reform criminals and erased Batman's memories of this being a thing when he found out and objected because ethics wtf.

That last one was sufficiently story-breaking they started pretending it hadn't happened as quickly as possible. Which was amazingly quickly considering Identity Crisis was the basis for things like killing off the presiding Robin's remaining parent. They actually soft-reset the whole world fairly soon after by timeskipping over most of a year and being like ahem anyway the past is in the past. And then the universe just kept serially ending for over a decade, so it's been weird.

Justice League has reliably gotten a shiny coat of polish with every reboot tho lol.

(Still not over the way they were like, okay we're wiping Green Lantern back to Hal but now we don't have the token black guy everyone who saw the cartoon expects, let's promote Cyborg people know him because of that other cartoon, ah shit he doesn't work without a partner to do bits with. well we can't put garfield logan in the justice league it's too prestigious, he's from the doom patrol for a reason, yeah i know we've had folks like plastic man shut up this is a Cool Sexy new reboot where Superman and Wonder Woman are fucking, we're not using friggin beast boy. how about Captain Marvel? yeah ok shazam is An Silly Joker now and besties with this 20 year old who may or may not know about his elaborate cognitive situation. i don't actually think they put even this much effort into it but otoh maybe they debated really hard and this was the compromise.

........actually vic could probably work up a decent oppositional patter with eel o'brien ik they were never gonna use plastic man but i don't hate it.)

Right. There was a point.

Obviously I'm probably missing a few big dramas here, but the point is DC was trying to keep up with the fantastic dysfunction of the Avengers because if it bleeds it leads, but even in the Dark Age they could not dive in groin first without tarnishing valued brands. The Justice League is simply not built to tell the same types of stories that the Avengers are.

In Justice League stories the narrative will typically be split in focus to a varying degree between the problems created by the villain and the personal emotional situations--the problems--of the heroes. Usually the villain leads and provides the emotional stakes. Only occasionally, overall, do problems between the heroes rise to the same level. Even when they're having them canonically in some other book Justice League tends to be ruled not the right place for that.

Secret identities are traditionally kept to a minimum in the League and League stories, though what this means in practice has gone through some shifts.

This is not just the difference between DC and Marvel house styles, though of course that's part of it, nor is it the League being older, because it isn't by any significant amount. It replaced the Justice Society of America in 1960. Other teams, even the Titans to an extent which was just the junior wing of the League at first, were allowed to get more into the grit sooner, and have the experimental story of Speedy's career-ending heroin problem happen and intra-team dating drama take the foreground, and all that. Doom Patrol was all about the dysfunction, god.

But the Justice League is simply not designed to be that kind of a team book, and when it's occasionally written that way the seams usually creak.

#ask #hoc est meum #Anonymous #despite racing to the bottom of the pit in many ways #dc has never stopped being fundamentally more conservative than marvel #somehow even now that marvel is disney owned #like partly that's just dc being in internal meltdown mode #but also like the incredible hulk got to be a hellacious horror comic under disney etc #soon i will be out of quarantine and these asks will stop working #comics #damn i spent so long writing this shit i almost lost my duolingo streak #i need to make different life choices #i'm putting away laundry and going to bed

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hardly-an-escape · 11 months

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Among the Stars We are Reborn

Square: A4 - Creature: Phoenix Rating: T Word Count: 5399 Ship(s): Dream of the Endless | Morpheus/Hob Gadling Warnings: No archive warnings apply Additional Tags: Dreamling Bingo fill, Creature: Phoenix, canon divergent, future fic, established relationship, science fiction, speculative fiction, space travel, Hob Gadling throughout history, Hob Gadling in space Summary: Some centuries in the future, Hob has taken to the stars, working as a freelance researcher and courier. He is on his way to one of Jupiter’s moons on a research mission when Dream joins him, and together they search for the elusive Ionian phoenix. Read on AO3 | fill for @dreamlingbingo

The funny thing was, it was never quiet in space. Hob had thought it would be, that first time he’d left the planet in his own ship... At some point he’d had formed the idea that once he got up there by himself, once he left the public spaceport and the press of overpopulation behind, he would leave the noise behind, too. Find, at last, a pure silence, the likes of which he hadn’t experienced in all his long life. Space, he’d thought, under the right circumstances, could be free of everything, of bugs and advertisements and other people, of every little noise. He’d been wrong.

The funny thing was, it was never quiet in space.

Hob had thought it would be, that first time he’d left the planet in his own ship.

Commercial spaceflights were loud, of course, and always had been – as bad as planes were, back in the day, and maybe even worse, during the longer flights to the Mars colonies – industrial-sized rockets generating industrial-sized noise ferrying care packages and flour and crying children across the solar system instead of cross-country. But at some point he had formed the idea that once he got up there by himself, once he left the public spaceport and the press of overpopulation behind, he would leave the noise behind, too.

Find, at last, a pure silence, the likes of which he hadn’t experienced in all his long life. Space, he’d thought, under the right circumstances, could be free of everything, of bugs and advertisements and other people, of every little noise.

He’d been wrong.

It wasn’t just that his little ship, new as she was, made her own small moans and groans on that first test run beyond the edge of Earth’s atmosphere. The crackle of the radio, the hum of the engines, the muted whistle of the air purifier – all these sounds could be turned off, and Hob had done so. He’d shut down everything but the most basic life support and floated in the liminal space between the Earth and the Moon for a full ten minutes, a tiny soap bubble in the darkness. He’d breathed deeply, taken his mind away from the sound of his own heartbeat, and listened.

Turns out, space makes its own music.

As the years went by, he gained a variety of descriptions of the music from other spacefarers who’d heard it too. Some of the more fanciful freelancers called it celestial jazz and discussed at length whether it followed a particular meter, if it was chromatic or pentatonic in scale, and other musical terms Hob barely understood.

A group of missionaries he met on a remote Martian outpost insisted that the music was the means by which God was expressing themself directly to the universe.

Scientists talked about background radiation and planetary resonance and something called vacuum atmospherics on which he read several papers before deciding, ruefully, that there were some mathematic principles which he would simply never understand.

He’d asked Dream about it, once. Had even shut down all systems like he had that first time, just to listen. (He still does, occasionally, because whatever it is, it is beautiful.)

What is it? he’d asked. You must know.

And Dream had smirked that particular Endless smirk that drove Hob mad, and drawn him away from the viewscreen and its twinkling miniature Earth.

Stars dream, too, Hob Gadling.

And that had been all Hob had been able to glean from his lover on the subject.

Hob’s ship was not a thing of beauty. Her design was far too boxy and utilitarian for that. But Hob loved his snug little vessel with an almost obsessive affection. She reminded him of a camper van he’d had in the 1960s, or the massive rolltop desk he’d put in his study in the late 1800s, everything folded away in neat drawers and cubby holes, not an inch wasted. He reveled in it every time he made ready for a trip: packing away his clothes and gear, choosing rations, replacing the air filters, checking the water purifier and the drip lines on his tiny hydroponic garden.

And, crucially, she was all his.

Even the New Inn, way back when, hadn’t really been all his. There’d been investors and mortgage holders and zoning committees and eventually the National Heritage List to contend with, and while Hob had been the one to pick the lighting fixtures and design the wooden inlay on the bar, it had always been fundamentally a group project. Not to mention that its very purpose was to serve as a gathering place, a safe space for anyone who happened to walk through the door.

Not so his spaceship. All right, he hadn’t built her himself – despite his best efforts, he would never be more than a mediocre aerospace engineer – but Hob had spent weeks at the dealership, poring over schematics and blueprints, personally choosing the design of every single cubic centimeter. The sales associate had leered a little when Hob insisted on a double-wide bunk, given that all the other specs were for single occupancy – but he was paying cash, not financing, so it wasn’t like they were going to argue with him.

He’d known it was worth a little leering, the first time he and Dream had wrapped their arms around each other and gazed out the tiny porthole window at the stars, so close you could almost reach out and touch them.

Dream had been with him when his ship was delivered to the public spaceport nearest Hob’s flat. They’d walked around her together, Dream smiling slightly as Hob enthusiastically described the engines and pointed out the retractable heat shields. His long fingers had trailed over the official designation engraved on the side – Hob still thought of it as a license plate, like on his car – and he’d raised an eyebrow.

“I know,” Hob had laughed. “Can you believe it?”

“You did not choose this number on purpose?”

“Believe it or not, no. They’re automatically assigned during manufacture, randomly generated so each one is unique. This is pure human coincidence, my friend. Or maybe fate, who knows – we’ll have to ask your brother. Not that he’ll tell us.”

Dream had traced the numbers again: UKCS-001389, big and bold. Then he’d smiled.

“Come, take me inside,” he’d said. “I would see that my beloved will live well among the stars.”

Hob had locked the hatch behind them.

Later, after Hob had showed off every corner and cubbyhole, and after they had thoroughly evaluated the comfort and structural integrity of the double-wide bunk, they’d sprawled together, fingers finding new patterns on familiar skin.

“Have you given any thought as to what you might name her?” Dream had asked idly.

“Some. My first idea was to call her the Robin.” Hob had sighed. “I liked to think of that name flying off to the moon and other planets – but it was already taken and the UKSA doesn’t allow for duplicates.”

“And your second choice?”

“Well,” Hob had turned and run the backs of his knuckles down Dream’s cheek. “I do have another idea. But I wanted to ask you about it first. I was thinking… well, you’ve told me so much about her… I was thinking, I might name her Jessamy.”

Dream’s head had turned slowly toward Hob, an inscrutable look in his eye.

“I know it was a while ago now, even by our standards. But she was with you for so long. She loved you, protected you –”

“And failed, in the end,” he’d said thickly. “And died.”

“She didn’t fail. And I don’t think her death is the most important thing about her. I mean, I don’t think it’s bad luck or anything, you know? It’s only one bad moment in a long, long string of good ones. And, you know,” he had stumbled gamely on, “I like the idea that part of her – part of you – would be traveling with me. A new adventure. It would make me feel… close to you, if she were with me. When you aren’t here.”

Dream had simply looked at him, for a long moment, and then pushed him onto his back and rolled on top of him, kissing him slowly and sweetly and deeply.

“Even after all this time, the depth of your heart never fails to astonish me. I would be honored,” he’d said, “if Jessamy were to fly again with you. And so, I think, would she.”

The next day, Hob had gone to the nearest Space Agency office, waited in an interminable line, and officially registered UK Civilian Ship 001389 as the Jessamy.

A week later, she flew for the first time. Or again, depending on how you measure it. And thus the newest chapter in Hob’s long life had begun.

Read the rest on AO3 >>>

many thanks to @tryan-a-bex for the beta read!

green = complete, orange = WIP

#the sandman #dreamling #dreamling bingo #dream of the endless #hob gadling #my writing #science fiction #speculative fiction #give me Hob in space I beg you

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silverstagspirit · 11 months

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I have read the Yuu the scientific phenomenon, and I'm not sure if I send the ask, because I have memory problems.

But the idea of some of like dangerous food being commonly eaten, and Yuu not eating because it contains a lot more poison. Also, funfact bamboos can be poison especially bamboo shoots, that's why some people have to cook it, aka boil the poison out of it (atleast based on YT Shorts of Vietnamese person living in Germany). Because I wonder what food are poison in Twisted but isn't at out world (aka the grandillas), and what food that are like delicacies but Yuu will straight up die, if they eat it.

Also, you know that there is a place in our world where the gravity is a bit funky. Like really funky.

Tho, I know that Twisted have chilli's, but have they ever have the straight up fucked up chilli's that by just looking makes you cry (exaggerating ik). But Yuu just eating it being yummy and borderline calling the fire department, and going to the bathroom.

Speaking of bathroom, lactose intolerance, depending on where Yuu lives, they might have better lactose tolerance or worse. So Yuu going to bathroom, is just pain.

Also, what about peeps who have genetic mutation where cilantro taste bitter or like soap.

The lactose intolerant part has already been discussed on the biology tag.

But the Cilantro thing jogged a memory from my past. If you'd like to hear it, here it is:

That's the end of the story

We had a vegetable garden that was made in raised, wooden beds. My Dad had made these troughs with his own carpentry skills. And one time, we had grown Cilantro in it. During that time, though, a large rainstorm hit, and the raised bed's flooring collapsed. Me and my brother and I had to go out and save the plants from being washed away. But when I got to the Cilantro, I was hit with literally one of the worst smells in my entire life. It was so strong. And at the time, I didn't know what was causing it. I was being handed the uprooted Cilantro plants to put in a bucket. But I noticed that some of the plants had a transparent slime at their roots. And I realized the smell was coming from them. (The smell was actually so bad that I had to step away and take a few breaths every couple of seconds) If I had to describe the smell, it would be: if a bag of chlorine got together with decaying plant matter. After that whole dilemma, maybe some time later or right afterward with the same plants, my mom made butterchicken. She put in the cut-up Cilantro with the chicken, and I ate it. Let's just say I did not like it, then proceeded to spend the next fifteen minutes picking all of the Cilantro out of my bowl.

As for the other bits:

The funky gravity part had me thinking about something I heard in science fiction. That, if humans were to live on Mars, they would become super tall and have very pale skin. Imagine a Yuu that lives on an Earth that has already made it to Mars and has people living there. And they're just another country to us.

The boys coming to Earth and passing by someone who had immigrated to Earth from Mars:

"So the next stop is that way. We better get moving if we want to—"

"Waaaarrghh?!?!?!"

"Huh?! What?! What is it?"

"There's some giant person over there!" *points at a Martian in the market.*

"That's rude, Ace! They're just getting fruit from the stalls."

"Prefect, didn't you say that there were only humans in this world?"

"They are a human, they're just a Martian."

"Martian?"

"People here have colonized the planet next door, and when you stay on that planet, you grow taller and become paler due to the lower gravity and staying in sealed buildings."

"So yer' sayin' that I can grow taller just by chilling in a certain place?!"

"Not necessarily, but you will grow taller if you live on Mars long enough."

"Mars?"

"That's the 'planet next door' that I mentioned earlier."

"Oh."

#twst #twisted wonderland #biology au #answering asks

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thebookofm · 1 year

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Recommended Reading

Here is a list of books, both prose and graphic, that I think are worth checking out. All of these books are speculative fiction (science fiction, fantasy, alternate reality, et cetera), since that’s essentially the only genre I read. Entries followed by a ♥ are my extra-special favorites. The ones marked with an H won at least one Hugo Award. Those marked with a ▽ contain prominent LGBTQ+ characters or issues.

Lighter Science Fiction

Douglas Adams: The Hitchhicker's Guide to the Galaxy and its first two sequels, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, and Life, the Universe and Everything. The Hitchhiker’s Guide is a landmark work in SF comedy and is a must-read. If you are an audio listener, then I suggest starting with the 1978 BBC radio play, which was the original version of this story. (If you like THHGTTG, then check out Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency and its sequel.) ♥

John Scalzi: Any of his SF, especially the Old Man's War series and the Interdependency series (The Collapsing Empire and its sequels). Scalzi’s work, with few exceptions, is not only very funny, but also includes some good science-fiction-y “big ideas.” If you are a fan of Star Trek, then his novel Redshirts, which won a Hugo, will be of particular interest. Interestingly in some of Scalzi’s recent work, such as Kaiju Preservation Society and the Lock In series, he never revels the gender of the main character. Almost all of Scalzi’s audiobooks are read by Wil Wheaton. Wheaton does a great job, but his voice does tend to make the listener imagine the main character as a man, even when there’s no textual evidence to support that imagining. ♥H

Martha Wells: The Murderbot Diaries (All Systems Red and sequels), winner of the 2021 Hugo Award for best series. Despite the name, this series of five novellas and one novel follows a human-bot hybrid (not a robot) security unit (SecUnit) as it struggles to protect its stupid humans while coping with social anxiety and finding time to watch soap operas. Plus, it doesn’t really murder all that often. The series is very funny, but it is also a surprisingly serious and insightful examination of sentience, autonomy, and living with neuroses. Wells, who identifies as neurodivergent, will write three more Muderbot books, beginning in November 2023, as part of her six-volume deal with Tor. I particularly enjoy Kevin R. Free’s narration of the audiobooks. I’m counting these books for LGBTQ+ representation because Murderbot is nonbinary and asexual, but since it isn’t human (and doesn’t want to be), nonbinary and/or ace readers (whom I assume to be human) may not find themselves reflected in Murderbot’s experience. ♥H▽

Scott Meyer: The Authorities series (The Authorities and Destructive Reasoning), Master of Formalities, and Grand Theft Astro. Meyer’s books are all hilarious, fun adventures. The Authorities books follow a privately funded taskforce created to investigate crimes that the police cannot solve. Megan Sloan is one of my favorite detectives in fiction. Master of Formalities follows a protocol expert in a far-future monarchy. My favorite gag in this book occurs when someone becomes his own uncle. Grand Theft Astro is a heist story with Meyer’s trademark humor. If you enjoy these books, check out his Magic 2.0 series, which is described in the Lighter Fantasy/SF Mashups section. Luke Daniels, who narrates all of Meyer’s audiobooks, does an excellent job with these stories. ♥

Ernest Cline: Ready Player One. This book is great fun, especially for those that remember the ‘80s or enjoy the popular culture of that era. The audiobook is narrated, very appropriately, by nerd icon Wil Wheaton.

Andy Weir: The Martian and Project Hail Mary. The Martian is the basis of the very faithful film adaption (which I also recommend), and it is super-realistic science fiction with a lot of jokes. Project Hail Mary feels much like The Martian (though far more speculative) at first, but a third of the way in, a major plot development shakes up the story for the better. ♥

Dennis E. Taylor: We are Legion (We are Bob) and sequels (the Bobiverse series). This series begins with the dark premise of the protagonist being uploaded into a von Neumann probe and launched into deep space, but it’s actually very funny. Ray Porter does a great job narrating the audiobooks.

More Serious Science Fiction

David Brin: Startide Rising and The Uplift War. In this universe, sentient species modify or “uplift” presentients to help them bridge the gap to sentence, after which the “client” species is indentured to its “patron” for 100,000 years. Humans, once discovered by the Five Galaxies civilization, only escape indenture because they have already uplifted chimpanzees and dolphins, making humans the lowest-ranking and most hated patron species in the known universe. These books have great worldbuilding and aliens that are very well developed in terms of both biology and culture. The other Uplift books are also good, but these two, which each won a Hugo, are my favorites. ♥H

David Brin: Glory Season. This novel is an amazing extrapolation of an agrarian society built on parthenogenesis. The main character is a rare “variant,” a person who wasn’t cloned but was instead conceived sexually via one of the tiny number of men on the planet. She and her twin must find roles in society without the benefit of membership in a clan of genetically identical women occupying an established niche. Plus, there are fun puzzles and Conway’s Game of Life. ♥

Vernor Venge: A Fire Upon the Deep and A Deepness in the Sky. In this universe, the laws of physics vary with the average density in the galactic “neighborhood.” Thus, while the Earth lies at a point where only sublight speeds and human-level intelligence are possible, farther out in the plane of the galaxy and especially off the plane, superluminal speeds and superhuman intelligence can be achieved. Also, on one planet in the “Slow Zone,” there is a race of wolf-like beings who are not individually sentient but who achieve sentience (via ultrasonic communication) in groups of four to six. These books have spectacular worldbuilding, well conceived aliens, and some very compelling science-fictional “big ideas.” Can be read in either order, but publishing order (as listed above) is likely best. Each novel won a Hugo. ♥H

Vernor Venge: Across Realtime. This volume is a compilation of the novels The Peace War and Marooned in Realtime as well as the novella The Ungoverned. These stories revolve around an interesting technology for altering how time passes.

James S. A. Corey: The Expanse series (Leviathan's Wake, eight sequel novels and several shorter works). Fairly hard science fiction based on a politically strained three-way balance of power in a solar system that is confronted with terrifying alien technology. This series is the basis for The Expanse TV/web series, which I also recommend. The Expanse won the 2020 Hugo for best series. ♥H

Ann Leckie: Ancillary Justice and sequels (The Imperial Radch series). A far-future story in which a sentient ship formerly controlling and inhabiting many human bodies is now confined to a single human body (and with its ship self destroyed). These books attracted a lot of attention because the Radchaai language only uses female pronouns, and thus the gender of many of the characters is never revealed, but there's a lot more to this story than that. Ancillary Justice won basically all the awards offered in 2013. Leckie’s novel Provenance and her upcoming Translation State take place in the same universe but follow new characters. ♥H▽

Arkady Martine: A Memory Called Empire and A Desolation Called Peace. A new ambassador (with the old ambassador’s memories shoved into her brain) is appointed to represent a “barbarian” space station to the “civilized” Teixcalaanli Empire, where she becomes embroiled in a succession crisis and meets people with names like Three Seagrass (my favorite character) and Eight Antidote. Eventually, she must also negotiate first contact with sentient aliens. These books are an interesting examination of imperialism and language. Both novels won the Hugo Award. H▽

Becky Chambers: The Wayfarers series (The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet and sequels). This anthology series explores different cultures and locations in a well developed galactic civilization. Wayfarers won the 2019 Hugo Award for best series. H▽

Lighter Fantasy/SF Mashups

Scott Meyer: Off to Be the Wizard and its sequels (the Magic 2.0 series). These books are science fiction disguised as fantasy. An amateur hacker discovers a computer file that can be edited to change the real world. Within 24 hours, everything goes wrong, and he flees from the FBI to medieval England, planning to set himself up as a wizard using his new capabilities. That plan doesn’t go well, either. These books are laugh-out-loud funny and may be of particular interest to computer scientists. The audiobooks’ narrator, Luke Daniels hilariously brings the text to life. ♥

More Serious Fantasy/SF Mashups

Tamsyn Muir: The Locked Tomb series (Gideon the Ninth, Harrow the Ninth, Nona the Ninth, and Alecto the Ninth [not yet published]). Charles Stross described the first novel as “Lesbian necromancers explore a haunted gothic palace in space!” Honestly, I’m not sure whether to put this series under the “Lighter” or “More Serious” heading. There is a lot of humor, especially in the first book, but there is also quite a lot of horror and sadness. The second novel will absolutely gaslight you, forcing you to question your own sanity, but you’ll be glad you trusted Muir before you reach the end of the book. I can’t imagine anyone other than the excellent Moira Quirk narrating these books. ♥▽

John Scalzi: The God Engines. This novella, in which humans use enslaved gods (defeated enemies of their own god) to power their starships, is almost the only Scalzi work without a large dose of humor. It’s very good, though.

Anne McCaffrey: The first six Dragonriders of Pern books. (I've only read the first six.) These are science fiction disguised as fantasy and are classics in the genre. Far in the future, on an agrarian planet that has forgotten its history, humans ride sentient, telepathic dragons into battle against deadly spores that fall from the sky when another planet in an extremely eccentric orbit comes close.

Lighter Fantasy

Nicholas Eames: The Band series (Kings of the Wyld, Bloody Rose, and Outlaw Empire [not yet published]). Mercenary bands are the rock stars of the fantasy world in which these novels take place, attracting rabid fans and touring huge arenas. These books certainly have strong elements of humor, much of which is focused on the central conceit, but there is also a lot of action and pathos to be had. Both published books a great fun to read, and I’m looking forward to reading the third.

Tamsyn Muir: Princess Floralinda and the Forty Flight Tower. This novella subverts fairytale tropes and comments on gender roles while delivering an outsized dose of Muir’s trademark dry humor. Moira Quirk is hilarious as the audiobook narrator. I’m counting this book for LGBTQ+ because one of the characters doesn’t identify with any gender and because the story examines gender roles. ♥▽

Travis Baldree: Legends and Lattes. A female orc warrior retires from adventuring to open a coffee shop. "What's coffee?" everyone asks. This novel is well crafted, full of interesting characters, and very cute. My friend @novelconcepts aptly described it as “a beautiful warm hug of a book.” There's even a tiny touch of WLW romance, if you’re into that. Baldree is writing a prequel. ▽

More Serious Fantasy

Brandon Sanderson: All of the series and standalone books that are set in the Cosmere (rather than on some alternate Earth). Mistborn: The Final Empire is probably a good place to start. The Stormlight Archive (The Way of Kings and sequels) is my favorite series of Sanderson’s, but each of those books is >1300 pages or >45 hours in audio form, so it may not be the best place to start. Era 2 of the Mistborn series (set 300 years after the Era 1) is probably the most fun. Sanderson also has many books not set in the Cosmere that are more than worth reading. His method of taking a break from writing is to write on a different series, so, every year, he puts out ~400,000 words worth of material (3-4 normal novels or a single Stormlight book). If you listen to the audiobooks of the Stormlight Archive, I recommend getting the hardcopy as well, since the art included really helps bring the world of Roshar to life. ♥

Scott Lynch: The Lies of Locke Lamora and sequels (The Gentleman Bastard series). Great worldbuilding of an original fantasy world with dark humor. Lynch finally completed his first draft of Book 4 (of 7 planned) in May 2019 after a 4-year delay, so I’m hoping it will be available eventually. I’m starting to give up hope, though.

China Miéville: Perdido Street Station. Very rich worldbuilding. Very, very dark. Don’t read this book if you aren’t interested in depressing storylines. Miéville’s other work is just as inventive and, in his word, “weird” as this one.

N. K. Jemison: The Broken Earth trilogy (The Fifth Season and its sequels). These books have an intriguing premise, extensive worldbuilding, and an interesting writing style. These novels won the best-novel Hugo for three consecutive years, which no author had done before. H▽

Alternate Reality (Including Alternate History and Steampunk)

Elizabeth Bear: Karen Memory. This novel follows a lesbian prostitute as she teams up with a lawman in a steampunk version of a Seattle-like city in the Pacific Northwest. I also enjoyed Bear’s space opera series, White Space (Night and Machine). ▽

Cherie Priest: Boneshaker and its sequels (The Clockwork Century series). Steampunk + zombies = fun. This story begins with a plague of zombification erupting out of Seattle, and it finally provides a reason for Steampunks to wear goggles. ♥

Ian Tregillis: The Mechanical and its sequels (The Alchemy Wars series). Alchemy + steampunk robots + a little philosophy.

China Miéville: The City and the City. See the Detective Stories section of this document. ♥

Felix Gilman: The Half-Made World. Steampunk mixed with fantasy. Also, sentient, demon-possessed firearms.

Mary Robinette Kowal; The Lady Astronaut series (The Calculating Stars and sequels). This universe is an extremely hard-science-fiction alternate history in which a catastrophic event dramatically accelerates the space program. The Lady Astronaut of Mars, a short story, is chronologically last but was written first. There’s also a short story called “We Interrupt this Broadcast” that comes chronologically first but isn’t closely connected to the rest. Kowal’s second job is audiobook narrator—she narrates Seanan McGuire’s October Daye series, for example—and she narrates all these books herself. Interestingly, Kowal’s third job is puppeteer, so she’s pretty busy.

Scott Westerfeld: The Leviathan series, as described in the young-adult section of this list. ♥

Detective Stories in Speculative-Fictional Settings

Scott Meyer: The Authorities and Destructive Reasoning. See the Lighter Science Fiction section. ♥

John Scalzi: Lock In and its sequel, Head On. This series of detective stories takes place in a world where a disease has left millions of people “locked into” paralyzed bodies and forced to use remotely operated mecha to interact with the world. Scalzi never reveals the gender of the main character, leaving it up to the reader’s imagination.

John Scalzi: The Dispatcher series. As of a few years ago, if someone is intentionally killed, they stand a 99.9% chance of recovering with their body reset to a few hours earlier, which makes murder more difficult, but not impossible. Dispatchers are licensed to kill—I mean dispatch—people before they can die from injuries or illnesses, thus giving them a second chance. One such service provider gets caught up in illegal dispatches and a series of mysteries.

Brandon Sanderson: Snapshot. Two detectives are sent into a snapshot, a detailed simulation of an entire city and its millions of inhabitants on a specific day, to investigate a crime.

China Miéville: The City and the City. This book is amazingly thorough exploration of a ridiculous premise: two cities occupying the same space. This novel is probably my favorite of Miéville’s books. ♥

Richard K. Morgan: Altered Carbon. A murder mystery with an SF “big idea” at its core. The basis for a Netflix series that I haven’t seen.

Superheroes and Supervillains in Prose

Brandon Sanderson: Steelheart and sequels (The Reckoners series). This is a young-adult series in which all super-powered people, called Epics, eventually turn evil.

Seanan McGuire: The Velveteen series. This series is McGuire’s funniest work and is available for free here, but I recommend buying the books to support the author. McGuire also has a number of other fantasy series under her own name as well as some SF/horror series under the pen name Mira Grant.

Comics and Graphic Novels

Brian K. Vaughan, Cliff Chiang, and Matt Wilson: Paper Girls. This 30-issue comic follows four newspaper-delivery girls who get swept up in a temporal war on Hell Day, 1988. They travel to the ancient past and the far future, meet their adult selves, and learn a lot about themselves in the process. The comic was adapted into an excellent Amazon Prime series, which is a bit more character-focused than the plot-driven comic. Both comic and show are recommended. ♥▽

Ryan North: The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl. This comic was my favorite ongoing superhero series until its recent ending. Firstly, it’s hilarious. Secondly, since Doreen Green (Squirrel Girl’s alter ego) is a computer-science student, there are a number of gags about coding and math. Thirdly, the heroine usually solves her problem not by beating up the villains, but by empathizing with them, understanding their problems, and helping them find nonviolent solutions. Since the series ended with Issue 50, it’s quite possible to read it all. ♥

N. D. Stevenson: Nimona. This mash-up of fantasy and science fiction is not only filled with humor but also includes a surprising amount of sweetness. ▽

Various authors: Lumberjanes. This young-adult comic series follows a group of cabin-mates at a summer camp for girls—excuse me, “hard-core lady-types”—as they encounter a surprisingly high frequency of supernatural phenomena over one time-dilated summer. This comic wrapped up its run after 75 issues. ▽

Alan Moore: Watchman. There’s a reason many people point to this graphic novel as an exceptional example of the genre. Honestly the way the story is told is more interesting than the story itself, but the storytelling is well worth the price of admission.

Short Stories in Speculative-Fiction Settings

Various authors: Metatropolis and its sequels. This series of anthologies is a near-future look at how cities (and green spaces) might evolve.

John Scalzi: Shadow War of the Night Dragons, Book One: The Dead City: Prologue. Trust me, read this hilarious fantasy parody for free here.

John Scalzi: Miniatures. A collection of very short science-fiction stories.

Young-Adult Speculative Fiction

Brandon Sanderson: The Rithmatist. In an alternate United States (so not in the Cosmere), geometric drawings are used to defend the world against an onslaught of 2D creatures. If you listen to the audiobook, I strongly suggest buying the hardcopy as well, since the drawings included play such as strong role in the story. I also suggest the Reckoners series, listed above, but The Rithmatist is my favorite non-adult story from Sanderson. ♥

Scott Westerfeld: Leviathan, Behemoth, and Goliath. This series takes place in an alternate-history WWI, where one side uses steampunk mecha, and the other relies on genetically engineered animals. There’s a bonus epilogue online, for those how can’t get enough. The hardcopy contains some very nice illustrations. The companion Manual of Aeronautics provides much additional (full-color) artwork, though the character descriptions in the last few pages contain major spoilers. ♥

Mark Lawrence: The Book of the Ancestor trilogy (Red Sister, Grey Sister, and Holy Sister). On a world being buried under ice, an orphan with magical powers joins others like her training to become warrior nuns. ▽

Myke Cole: The Sacred Throne series (The Armored Saint and sequels). In a land ruled by a religious tyrant who claims to have defeated devils from another plane, a teenage girl must fight to protect those she loves when the emperor’s vicious zealots arrive at her tiny village. Plus, there’s a steampunk mecha suit. The age of the protagonist points toward a young-adult audience, but this book has far more violence than is typical of YA novels. ▽

T. Kingfisher: A Wizard’s Guide to Defensive Baking. “T. Kingfisher” is a pseudonym used by Ursula Vernon for young-adult and adult titles. This book follows a very minor wizard whose magic only works on dough. The story is full of humor and heart, and there’s more than a little (bread-based) action as well.

Anne McCaffrey: The Harper Hall Trilogy: Dragonsong, Dragonsinger, and Dragondrums. These books are a subset of McCaffrey’s Dragonriders of Pern series, which is discussed eleshere.

Suzanne Collins: The Hunger Games series. These books are the basis for the kids-killing-kids battle royale film series.

Children’s and Middle-Grade Speculative Fiction

Lemony Snicket: A Series of Unfortunate Events. Very well done, but also very dark. The Netflix series based on the books is also quite good.

Ursula Vernon: Castle Hangnail. This adorable story follows a would-be wicked witch who applies to fill a vacancy at the titular castle.

Brandon Sanderson: The Alcatraz series (beginning with Alcatraz vs. The Evil Librarians). These books take place on an alternate Earth (thus not in the Cosmere) where most of the world is run by a cabal of evil librarians. There’s a ton of fun adventure and silly humor, which my son loved when I read them to him as an 8- to 9-year-old. Be sure to get the later printings with art by Hayley Lazo; her work is great.

Kazu Kibuishi: The Amulet series (beginning with The Stonekeeper). A portal-fantasy graphic novel with beautiful art and an interesting, magical setting.

#unsolicited opinions #bibliophilia #science fiction #fantasy #speculative fiction #alternate reality #alternate history #detective story #mystery #recommendation #books

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mrkapao · 1 year

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“I can believe things that are true and things that aren't true and I can believe things where nobody knows if they're true or not.

I can believe in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny and the Beatles and Marilyn Monroe and Elvis and Mister Ed. Listen - I believe that people are perfectable, that knowledge is infinite, that the world is run by secret banking cartels and is visited by aliens on a regular basis, nice ones that look like wrinkled lemurs and bad ones who mutilate cattle and want our water and our women.

I believe that the future sucks and I believe that the future rocks and I believe that one day White Buffalo Woman is going to come back and kick everyone's ass. I believe that all men are just overgrown boys with deep problems communicating and that the decline in good sex in America is coincident with the decline in drive-in movie theaters from state to state.

I believe that all politicians are unprincipled crooks and I still believe that they are better than the alternative. I believe that California is going to sink into the sea when the big one comes, while Florida is going to dissolve into madness and alligators and toxic waste.

I believe that antibacterial soap is destroying our resistance to dirt and disease so that one day we'll all be wiped out by the common cold like martians in War of the Worlds.

I believe that the greatest poets of the last century were Edith Sitwell and Don Marquis, that jade is dried dragon sperm, and that thousands of years ago in a former life I was a one-armed Siberian shaman.

I believe that mankind's destiny lies in the stars. I believe that candy really did taste better when I was a kid, that it's aerodynamically impossible for a bumble bee to fly, that light is a wave and a particle, that there's a cat in a box somewhere who's alive and dead at the same time (although if they don't ever open the box to feed it it'll eventually just be two different kinds of dead), and that there are stars in the universe billions of years older than the universe itself.

I believe in a personal god who cares about me and worries and oversees everything I do. I believe in an impersonal god who set the universe in motion and went off to hang with her girlfriends and doesn't even know that I'm alive. I believe in an empty and godless universe of causal chaos, background noise, and sheer blind luck.

I believe that anyone who says sex is overrated just hasn't done it properly. I believe that anyone who claims to know what's going on will lie about the little things too.

I believe in absolute honesty and sensible social lies. I believe in a woman's right to choose, a baby's right to live, that while all human life is sacred there's nothing wrong with the death penalty if you can trust the legal system implicitly, and that no one but a moron would ever trust the legal system.

I believe that life is a game, that life is a cruel joke, and that life is what happens when you're alive and that you might as well lie back and enjoy it.”

- Neil Gaiman ‘American Gods’

#american gods #neil gaiman #fantasy #novels #books #quotes

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he1iks · 10 months

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The Justice League and their personal policies on swearing

Superman: never ever, mostly due to getting his mouth washed out with soap for so much as 'dang' as a kid

Batman: he adjusts it to suit the audience,but it's VERY moderate even in purely adult company.

Wonder woman: found out about swearing during WWI, and swears when she thinks the situation deems it appropriate, no matter who's around

Flash: he'll go as far as s**t and no farther. Not on purpose, he just kinda doesn't.

Green lantern (Hal Jordan): cuss cuss cussity cuss

Martian Manhunter: "I believe most humans would deem it appropriate to say '****' in this context"

#dc #superman #batman #wonder woman #the flash #green lantern #martian manhunter #justice league #swearing

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sexymanbattleroyale · 1 year

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description for these guys under the cut, in case you dont know who they are

Marvin The Martian: hes probally very well known but if you dont know who he is, hes a martian who wants to blow up the earth/take it over, but daffy duck (aka DUCK DODGERS) usually thwarts him and shenagins ensue. hes the main antagonist of duck dodgers because hes the Martian commander, i would have more to add but honestly ive havent watched the show in a while. i think he also has an unrequited crush on the Martian queen in that show. Bubble Buddy: Bubble Buddy is a sentient soap bubble created by SpongeBob when he feels lonely in the episode of the same name. SpongeBob takes him to the Krusty Krab and Goo Lagoon, where the seemingly inanimate bubble inadvertently causes trouble and angers everyone he came in contact with, before revealing he is sentient and living. Just as he is about to be popped by a needle, Bubble Buddy suddenly animates, much to the shock of the townspeople, and decides to leave Bikini Bottom, saying that "things are getting a little weird around here." A bubble taxi picks him up and he leaves with a suitcase and disappears into the sky. (taken from his sexypedia entry. also i think in an episode that he reappeared in, it was like a bubble city and spongebob ended up in prison or something so that sure is a thing that happens!!!!)

#round two #stupid sexyman competition #marvin the martian #loony toons #duck dodgers #bubble buddy #spongebob

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mercy-mercie-mercymorn · 8 months

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agro's oc master list (2/?)

more links will come along eventually. i've realized that splitting up my oc universe into distinct categories is easier said than done. anyways, ocs under the cut because i don't want to explode ur dash (yet)

➼ greek gang ➼

cynthia

human?: nah, succubus! (generally referred to as hellspawn)

bday: n/a, but she’s decided she’s a scorpio

deal: faraj’s younger half-sister. has mommy issues and wants to kill her mom sooo bad. currently residing in a seaside California town where she vodka aunts it up for anyone who crosses her path. her former paramours include apollo, melia, lee, and many, many more. a member of the amica ignis. often carries a red umbrella with her.

powers: the best pyromancy. also she and faraj performed a ritual that makes them functionally immortal—they can’t die unless the other one is killed simultaneously (their injuries give the other minor side effects; cynthia’s is blood dripping from everywhere).

likes: annoying her brothers, trashy soap operas, and overcast weather. dislikes: her mother, the gods, and open-toed shoes (sandals are gauche).

songs: Venus - Shocking Blue, San Francisco - The Mowgli’s, Ace In The Hole - Saint Motel

faraj

human?: incubus (hellspawn)

bday: n/a

deal: cynthia’s older half-brother. the oldest hellspawn still kicking. a frequent but unenthusiastic accomplice in many of cynthia’s harebrained schemes. as phaidonos, was one of the important thinkers/philosophers in the ancient world, although his name was lost to history. currently an anthropology professor in toronto. angel is his TA.

powers: terramancy. a lot more powerful than he lets on. his blood ritual side effects are insane heartburn.

likes: breakfast food, weird-patterned ties and socks, and philosophy. dislikes: using the internet, wet socks, and being seen in sweatpants.

songs: Up the Wolves - The Mountain Goats, Mother Mother - Tracy Bonham, As Time Goes - JR JR

apollo

human?: deity

bday: he made it the fuck up (it’s the summer solstice of any given year)

deal: the greek god of the sun. artemis’s twin brother. a disaster bisexual. currently running a shrine on the asteriai island with his priestesses, vega and caph. paramours include vega (current), cynthia (former), virgo (former) and more. loving their mom is the only thing he and his sister can agree upon.

powers: can summon bow/arrows, healing, sun bullshit (teehee *blinds you*), musical magic, assorted godly powers like shapeshifting and summoning. immortal.

likes: pretty mortals, singing, and being the center of the universe. dislikes: his father’s wife, rainy days, and not being the center of the universe.

songs: Martian - The Moxies, Quesadilla - WALK THE MOON, Neighbor - Los Elk

artemis

human?: deity

bday: fuck no

deal: the greek goddess of the moon. apollo’s twin sister. often quite standoffish and mean (but i love her for it), especially towards apollo and cynthia. the only people she likes are angel and shinatobe. primarily spends time in the woods—occasionally with a few huntresses and some animal sidekicks. she’s just vibing.

powers: can summon bow/arrows, can do a bunch of animal-related magic, moon powers, assorted godly powers. immortal. can and will kill you with a single shot.

likes: solitude, animals, and being far, far away from her family. dislikes: you (probably), big cities, and video games (she is bad at them and does not understand them)

songs: Miranda Beach - COIN, Harlem - Cathedrals, Coole Katze - Namika

ash

human?: maenad (nymph in the service of dionysus), former naiad (water nymph)

bday: feb 29

deal: born as a naiad, became a maenad after a meet-cute with dionysus. one of the OG greek gang along with oenone and faraj. after two thousand-ish years with and without the hellspawn twins, has settled in NYC where she’s just trying to get high in peace. hopelessly in love with oenone.

powers: nails can become super sharp talons, can control how inebriated she gets (a surprise tool that will help us later!), and can occasionally call on Dionysus. immortality.

likes: drinking, MMA, and skinny-dipping. dislikes: cleaning her room, the gods, and being forced to pick sides.

songs: Harlem - New Politics, Cult of Dionysus - The Orion Experience, Queen Cobra - The Orphan The Poet

oenone

human?: oread (mountain nymph)

bday: n/a

deal: the wine woman of mount ida. a former minor player in the dumpster fire tableau that was the trojan war. historians and poets say she killed herself when she refused to heal her ex, paris, causing him to die. that’s just not true, but her friends don’t know what happened to her.

powers: terramancy, immortality.

likes: wine, goats, and lazy summer days. dislikes: the gods, weeding the garden, and city life.

songs: Prairie Girl - Rah Rah

#long post #but it's actually a bit short!#oc content lol #agro's oc master list

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martianbugsbunny · 8 months

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You know what was not fun? Suddenly out of nowhere developing eczema when I was in my mid teens.

1, it gets bad every time the season changes—every summer I'm like no yeah it gets really gnarly when it gets all hot and humid and every winter I'm like no yeah it gets really gnarly when it gets all cold and dry.

2, I'm horrible at the not-scratching thing. Do I know it will make the problem worse, and probably also cause some bleeding/weeping? Yep. Does that make it easier to resist? No. It itches. When things itch I want to scratch. I often do it without even thinking and oh shit now I feel bad because I should've "just not scratched" and also now my hands hurt more.

3, I fear even scratching what appears to be a regular itch on my hands, the insides of my elbows, or the backs of my knees, because I have it predominately on my hands but it's been really horrible on the backs of my knees especially, like before I realized there was actually something going on there I scratched so much it hurt when I ran soap over the skin while I was showering, and there were always these big red bumps with little spots of blood, and if I scratch in one of those places what if I cause it to flare up by irritating the skin?

4, I feel bad for complaining about it, because I feel like people are going to see me feeling sorry for myself about my (legitimate) skin condition and say okay dramatic bitch it's just a skin thing it's not that big a deal, and because I sometimes feel that way towards myself about it even though I live in my own body and I know it is a big deal; it itches all the time and it hurts and as you can clearly see by this post that all effects me mentally.

5, it makes me feel ugly sometimes. When I had it on my knees it was summer, and therefore I was wearing shorts, and it was visible and I knew it. I was so worried that people were going to look at it and be revulsed or make fun of me or just laugh about how ugly it was, because it's not pretty—and it's a medical condition, it's not supposed to be, but it still makes me feel lousy. On my hands, depending on how long my sleeves are, I can cover most of it, but I still know it's there and I worry that if I shift my hands too much while talking other people are going to see it and wonder ew, what's wrong with you, and not want to be near me.

6, it started at the worst possible time. I was a teenager with my first boyfriend, a very hard-won boyfriend mind you, talking to him in the first place was the boldest thing I'd ever dared to do not just because I knew he was cute and smart and that he liked superheroes, but because he was a human being and speaking to other humans is one of my greatest trials, and it was all well and fine until our second date was coming up and suddenly I had these horrible red patches all over my skin and all I wanted out of life at the time was to hold hands with my boyfriend but I felt incredibly self-conscious and sad about the idea that my eczema might gross him out and he wouldn't want to hold hands with me. (In case you're saying poor Martian, hunny did he let you down? no. he did not. I drove myself crazy not scratching and was lotioning day and night to try and get it under control and for the most part I did so I suppose I'll never know if he would've, given the opportunity, but I didn't have to worry about it on the day of the date itself so that's what counts for me.)

7, it's something I had to adapt to. not very good at doing that tbh. Every time I have a flare up I'm can't help thinking it wasn't always like this and being upset, because my skin used to act the way skin is supposed to and for some reason I don't even know, it stopped.

8, I was prescribed medicine (one that will literally do permanent damage to my skin if I use it too often but that's barely here or there), but if I forget to put my preemptive strike on for a couple of nights and there's a change in the weather and I don't use my anti-eczema lotion enough during the day then I have a flare up anyway.

9, once a flare up starts it's really hard to stop. Nine times out of ten one of the problems is that my hands are too dry to start with, but the medicine only makes them dryer, which while it does help them heal, it also creates a different secondary sort of problem that stymies the healing at a certain point. So I take a break from the medicine to focus on getting my skin to a healthy moisture level but that's really hard to do, I don't know why, and the eczema is getting worse because I'm not applying the medicine and I'm kind of stuck.

So...yeah. Eczema sucks and I'm not even a little brave about it, I'm just tired and sad.

#I'm not happy bob. not. happy.#eczema #skin health #or lack thereof #skin #also pretty sure I have low-grade psoriasis on my face sometimes bc it looks hexactly like when my dad has the same thing #it's way less visible and usually not a huge deal but it also itches and then of course I scratch and it bleeds #which just isn't good #anyway my hands look and feel horrible right now so oof lmao #martianbugsbunny grumbles

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