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alreadyblondenow · 4 years

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Moments of Impact

Yuta x reader // SMUT, ANGST, fluff?, college student! Yuta, camboy! Yuta, virgin reader Summary: You got in an accident and Yuta waits for you to wake up. While waiting for you, he can’t stop thinking about the good times you’ve had together. Word Count: 6k Warnings: Sad ending, swearing, explicit mature themes, mentions of motorcycle accident, mentions of other idols, virginity loss Note: I have a few notes, hihi. - Everything italic and indented are flash backs. There are date stamps you won’t get lost. -This story is inspired by my favorite movie The Vow, if you haven’t watched it yet I’d definitely recommend it. It’s a beautiful film, inspired by true events. -Another inspiration for this story is Forgotten written by @upinthestarsx3 I will never forget that beautiful fic, so please go check it out! -Again, I apologise in advance if there misplaced words, etc.

Pulling up the blanket to keep himself warm, trying to fit his long legs on the small couch, forcing himself to get some sleep amidst the noice of busy nurses and doctors talking to people, Yuta tries so hard to get some rest. After doing two jobs everyday, Yuta always stays in the hospital lounge so somehow you can feel his presence. At least that’s what he thinks.

You’ve been in a coma for 3 weeks already but for Yuta it felt like its been years. He constantly blames himself for where you are now, blaming himself for not taking care of you enough. As much as he wanted to tell you “I told you so” he would rather want you to wake up and hold you.

He felt someone tap his shoulder while he’s staring at the blank ceiling. It’s your brother Mark, offering him some cheap tea from the hospital’s cafeteria. Mark is the only person in your family that he can talk to, maybe it’s because Mark was like a brother to Yuta. From the moment you introduced Yuta to your family, they quickly disagreed to your relationship. They thought Yuta corrupted you and that he’s using you for your money. After the accident, they were so mad at Yuta telling him he cant see you anymore. Of course Mark defended Yuta but he couldn’t change the decision of his parents. Now the rest of your family is mad at him, not letting him see you even after the surgery.

“Any good news?” Yuta asks Mark.

Mark shook his head, “at least she’s still pretty while she’s sleeping” Mark gets his phone and shows Yuta a picture of you sleeping soundly in the hospital bed. It hurt him.

In years of being with you, Yuta loved seeing you sleeping beside him or when you passed out on the couch after watching a movie. But this time, he never thought he would hate that you’re sleeping now. He closed his eyes letting his tears fall, remembering good memories of you sleeping.

3 YEARS OF BEING TOGETHER

It was a cold morning and you are snuggled beside Yuta, enjoying his warmth and his soft skin on you. Sleeping naked after having sex was not the best idea but you love how the both of you shivers under the thick duvet. Yuta pull up the covers over your head making the bed warmer, hugging you closer and kissing your exposed shoulders.

“You’re enjoying this aren’t you?” you teased him, hovering your leg on his side caressing his soft butt cheek.

Not saying a word, Yuta’s other hand intertwined with your free hand, while his other hand roams around your body, softly and slowly. You can feel his touch on your leg, drawing small circles with the tip of his fingers. Teasing and slowly going up to your waist and back, whispering praises how soft your skin is while his eyes are closed. You didn’t miss how he’s touching your breast carefully not to hurt you or make you sensitive.

“Sleep. I’ll see you in the morning beautiful” he whispers softly behind your ear.

After the accident, Yuta’s life turned upside down. The life he had with you was a life full of happiness even though you both have personal struggles. Unlike you, Yuta is not rich. He came from a good family in Japan, but not rich enough to provide money for both school and other expenses. You offered him a deal one day, where he can’t actually refuse. You told him you can provide food for the both of you and the rent money, so he can focus on saving up for his college tuition. He agrees, taking your offer and he pays you back by loving you deeper everyday.

You didn’t made that deal just for the sake of being domestic, but you made that deal because you hated the idea of different girls having sex with your man. Yuta was a camboy before you came into his life, a rather popular one. Knowing that he’s having sex with different girls around the campus or with a specific someone and then coming home to you smelling like a stranger, hurts. It’s not that you’re against with the industry he’s on, but what if one day you can’t provide what Yuta wants in bed and he became sexually frustrated because of you? You always fight whenever Yuta goes live and have sex in front of many people. He always says “baby the sex I have with those girls were for money. It’s my work. No love.” Usually the fight went on for days and Yuta is the one who always accepts defeat.

Now that you’re not present at the moment, he didn’t have much choice but to go back on being a camboy. Reminiscing all the fights you’ve have regarding this issue, Yuta thought he would rather fight with you everyday just so he can hear your voice again. Being a camboy can provide all of his needs. Food for everyday, pay for the rent, money for his college fees and your hospital bills.

“Dude, my family is packed. Crazy rich. Really you don’t need to chip in money for the hospital bills.” Mark nagged Yuta when he found out Yuta was the one who payed for some of your hospital expenses.

“But I want to” is all Yuta can say as defense to Mark. “Anyway Mark, thanks for the talk. I have to go to work now.”

“Work as in…” Mark questions Yuta, giving him a look. Yuta nods, knowing all too well that Mark knew that he came back to the sex industry.

“Ugh! Dude! She’s gonna be pissed when she wakes up” Yuta waves goodbye at Mark leaving him at the hospital lounge.

On his way to the hotel where he’s going to “work” he saw these cheap chocolates you always loved and decided to buy one, with the hope that maybe you would wake up today so he could hand you the chocolate. Yuta was never a fan of chocolates, but this chocolate is delicious and this is the only chocolate he could eat. But the thing he loves the most about this chocolate is its the reason how you two met.

THE NIGHT YOU MET

It was Jaehyun’s house party and Yuta was bored to death so he decide to creep in Jaehyun’s kitchen and eat anything he could find. He was hoping to see something instant that he could cook easily without catching too much attention in the kitchen. After looking for some time, he gave up and decided to look for snacks instead. He found this chocolate wrapped in gold on the table near the beers. So annoyed that Jaehyun’s house does not have anything instant, he’s not very happy that he found a chocolate and not something that will give him a good burp. To his surprise, it was fucking delicious.

“Who fucking ate my chocolate?” you screamed trying to be heard under the loud party music. “I left it here. I was just getting a cup, then it was gone” you were practically screaming in front of your brother Mark.

Yuta felt guilty because he basically stole your chocolate. He made his way out of the party and went to the nearest store and tried to look for the exact same chocolate. Not knowing how to approach you, Yuta was nervous not to mention he got intimidated by your beautiful looks. Waiting for the perfect timing, he follows you around the party waiting for you to be alone so he could talk to you. But instead, he admires how you look good in that dress, how your hair follows your every move, your smile can light up the party, your laugh is like music to his ears. He didn’t notice he’s growing a little crush on you.

After three bottle of beers, the chocolate stays in his pocket while he chats with his friends. You notice that he’s following you around, stealing a glance from time to time, you decided to follow him when he went to the bathroom.

You waited for him to come out, and by the time he does you were somehow amazed by how beautiful he is. Fair skin, pointy nose, his hair looks softer than yours.

“I swear I didn’t mean to eat it” Yuta blurted out.

“Eat what? Sorry. I was just going to ask you why are you following me?”

He gave you a beautiful smile, one that you will never forget. He handed you the chocolate, his cheeks are turning red and his eyes somehow got smaller. You wanted to shout at him, show him your rage but his smile somehow calmed you down. “You ate it?”

“Yeah. But I went out to buy you a new one. I’m sorry. If this isn’t enough I could-“

“Ask me out” you didn’t know where that bravery come from but it felt good. You can feel your heart beating so fast, your chest could explode any minute.

And he did. For Yuta, it was the best decision he made in his fucked up life. For you, Yuta was the cherry on top of your colorful life already. Both of your worlds were completely different but you didn’t have second thoughts on giving up the world you used to know for him. Same goes for him, he made you the sun and moon of his life. You’ve been together for four beautiful years, ready to graduate from college in a couple of days and finally go to Japan to meet Yuta’s parents, stay there for a couple of months and get married with or without permission from your parents. That was the plan. Leave everything behind and live in Japan for good.

But the accident happened.

“Hey” Charlotte snaps her fingers in front of Yuta, bringing him back to reality.

He sees Charlotte already half naked wearing only her lingerie. “Sorry. I haven’t have enough sleep” Yuta proceeds to take off his shirt.

Assembling the camera to go live in a few minutes, he tries to gather himself and focus on his work. He has been having sex with a heavy heart so his performance was a little down lately, but today he plans on putting up a show to raise more money.

Yuta was an animal in bed, but he is always gentle to you whenever you have sex. Not very vanilla, he still chokes you and spanks you from time to time whenever he’s in the mood to have rough sex. But he doesn’t degrade you and call you a slut which you think is hot. Even though you hate his last job, you still think he’s good at what he does because he’s always great in bed. That’s why you never want to share him with anyone.

Graduation came in, Yuta’s parents finally came and they were excited to meet you. Yuta didn’t have the choice but to be honest with his parents and that he’s not going back to Japan with them as planned. It broke their heart but they understood that Yuta is struggling too.

After graduation, Mark somehow convinced his parents to let Yuta visit you, it was a tough battle but Mark made it possible. He was so happy that he can finally hold your hand again and be beside you while he waits for you to wake up. You didn’t know but you graduated with honors and Yuta was the one who came up on stage to get your awards.

“Baby, at least I get to experience receiving an award even though its not mine” he laugh while his tears fall continuously. He was admiring all your hard work over the years reminiscing some moments, reminding you all the sleepless nights you’ve had, every project you needed to redo, Yuta witnessed it all. He was so proud of you but he couldn’t show it enough because of your current state. “Graduation was sadder than I thought, Imagine I wouldn’t have to see Jaehyun and Johnny’s face everyday. I never thought I’d miss those fuckers” Yuta was tucking you in bed, making sure your comfortable before leaning closer to you, lips almost touched. “Congratulations to us baby, we made it” and he kissed you sweetly, careful but full of love.

Yuta continued to visit you in the hospital and he tries being with you as much as he can. Talking to you about almost everything even though you still show no response, for him it’s better than staying silent. He finally talked about how he got back to being a camboy again because life was hard for him when you got into the accident, but he’s finally looking a job as a college graduate and talks about it proudly.

He was so used on taking care of you, the nurses were surprised that Yuta was the one cleaning you with a warm damped towel and changing your clothes whenever he can. Of course the nurses thought Yuta was cute.

As time goes by, your parents saw the sincerity of Yuta towards you. All Yuta did was love you like he normally does even though you’re still in deep sleep. With that, Yuta didn’t expect your parents to be moved by his gestures and how he takes care of you. It was a bold move for your parents to talk to Yuta in front of you sleeping, hoping that you could hear every word they said to Yuta. “Baby, did you hear that? All is well now. We can finally get married without hurting your parents” he left a kiss on your left hand. Still no response.

One fine day of looking after you in the hospital, Yuta decided to take a peak at your journal out of curiosity. “Baby, I’m sorry I’m reading your journal now. Its just I’m so bored and I miss you so much” as he flips through the pages his eye caught this special day or rather fun night with you that he will never forget. It was the night when you two had sex for the first time, and the night Yuta took your virginity. He reads it with enthusiasm letting out soft and loud laughs whenever he reads something funny that you wrote. “I was tired, but I want Yuta to feel good” he read it out loud, the exact words written in your diary. “Baby, I wish I could turn back time just to tell you, you didn’t have to” he said while petting your head and goes back to reading.

2 MONTHS OF BEING TOGETHER

“What do you mean you’re a virgin?” Yuta teases you pretending that he doesn’t know that you’re still a virgin.

“Stop teasing or I’ll bite your dick off”

Yuta was still laughing because you were cute, “okay okay. easy” he pulled you close. “Mark told me actually” you shrugged by the thought of your own brother betraying you.

“You’re going to be the first and last dick I’ll be having. It sucks not being your first tho.”

“Someday, you’ll be my last” Yuta intertwined your hands on his and kissed you deeply like you always want to. But the first word that he said, still lingers in your mind. Someday. Maybe he really needed to work that’s why he can’t leave his job yet.

You pull away from his kiss, biting your lower lip while stroking his. You’ve been meaning to say that you wanted to have sex with him and you decided it has to be tonight. “I know you’ve been wanting to have sex with me” you breathed deeply, “and now I’m ready” Yuta cant believe what he just heard but it would be a lie if he said he wasn’t dreaming for this moment to happen. “You sure about this? It’s not that I don’t want to- Fuck I’ve been waiting for this to happen. But we’ve only been together for 2 months. I don’t want to rush you or anything”

Everything you heard from him is plain sweet. You can’t stop blushing and you couldn’t hide it either. He noticed that you’re being shy for a moment but he loves teasing and tickling you until you’re out of breath. While he was tickling you and kissing your neck at the same time, he absentmindedly touched your clothed pussy. You felt it through your thin shorts and you let out a gasp because of what he did. You two never went further than first base because you’re still this innocent girl in Yuta’s eyes and he respects that. “Sorry- uh, fuck I didn’t mean to touch it without your consent. It’s just, maybe because of my work baby. My hands are used to do it automatically-“ Yuta was rambling already but you were just looking at him with loving eyes. “Do it again?” you asked him spreading your legs a little. Hesitantly, he came closer to you slowly, caressing your exposed legs, asking for consent to put his hand inside your shorts. You nod.

It was a feeling like no other, you thought. One touch of Yuta’s finger on your wet slit made your eyes closed and pulling closer to him. Grinding your hips with his finger inside you, Yuta thought you weren’t innocent as he thought you could be.

He hovers on top of you making you aroused and needy enough to get wet. Kissing you softly and biting you from time to time. You keep your hands lock on his long hair, giving it soft pulls that made him moan. Whispering soft i love yous whenever you have enough air in your lungs.

Slowly peeling his clothes and your clothes off, you felt kind of shy when he got you on your bra and laced panties. He continues to kiss you softly and deeply, cupping your cheeks and drawing circles along your back.

“Just promise me, you’ll make me stop if something hurts. okay?”

“I promise”

Yuta unclasp your bra and slowly teased your left boob using his point finger. Careful not to touch your nipples yet, it makes you frustrated and needy enough. Kissing the valley between your breast, down to your abdomen, he removes your panties slowly his eyes not leaving yours. Blowing his hot breath on your soaked pussy, Yuta takes his time kissing your inner thighs and blowing on your entrance again and again, enjoying how you react on his teasing.

Parting your folds with his left hand and drawing circles using his right hand, you feel your pussy get soaked even more because of what Yuta is doing. You thought you could cum here and then but the moment he finally puts his tongue on your pussy, it felt so good you wanted to savour the feeling. When he finally see that you’re relaxing, he inserts his middle finger while licking slowly against you pussy. Adding another finger he makes sure you’re wet enough for his cock.

“Baby do you have anything in mind? Anything you want?” Yuta asks hovering you again while still playing with your soaked pussy. You shook your head “Okay. Just follow my lead, I’ll be gentle as possible” all you can do is nod.

He gets the condom beside the table and rolls it on his hard cock. By the time he’s in between your legs again, he’s slowly putting the tip inside your pussy. Pushing slowly and pulling out, again and again until he’s balls deep. You told Yuta that it hurt but you didn’t want him to stop. He became gentler than ever before being comfortable enough to move inside. He kisses you and whispers countless i love yous beside your ear while waiting for your signal to allow him to move. Your giggle making you gasps, you can feel your pussy stretched like never before “still okay?” he checks on you before he moves.

You accidentally clenched your pussy and it made him moan, you thought he was crying out loud. But he smiled and told you not to do that because that can make him cum fast. It feels good laughing while in the middle of having sex Yuta thought. He never felt this way before while having sex and he’s happy he get to experience this kind of feeling through you.

He kisses your boobs while moving his hips slowly. Making you moan and scratch his back because of the amazing feeling. Hands all over your body, Yuta can’t get enough of the feeling you’re giving right now. “Baby, you make me feel like a virgin again” Yuta whispered in between gasps while his working on slow deep thrust.

Surprised when he pulls out, he gently changed your position and making you bend on all fours. You were familiar with this position, feeling kind of excited by what Yuta is about to do next. He spreads you legs wider from behind, caressing your ass cheeks before giving it bites that made you whimper and wet even more.

“Not-so-fun-fact, but this is my favorite position” he whispers beside your ear and fucks you from behind. It was different than earlier you thought, this positions makes your mouth open and it makes you let out soft moans. “feels good?” Yuta managed to ask, you moan in response. This position hits different spots inside your pussy that makes you gasps and breath for more air. You finally understood why this is his favorite sex position.

After fucking you slow and deep for a good twenty minutes, now Yuta is pounding you in some sort of animalistic way, hearing him moan behind you. He grabbed both of your shoulder making you arch against his chest. You were startled by his sudden move but lust is taking over you now. He placed wet kisses on your cheeks hearing him moan when you try moving your hips on your own. “You’re the only girl that can make me moan baby, did you know that?”

Driven by lust and his love for you, he asked permission before he does something he’s sure you will love. “Baby, just say yes. You wont regret it” he said gasping for air while you still fuck back. “just don’t hurt me baby. okay, I’m ready” you answered trying to catch your breath, feeling your hips give up.

He encircled his right arm on your waist and his left hand on your throat, choking you. To be honest, you never thought choking would feel so good while he fucks you hard. Hearing only slaps of skin around the room, your eyes rolls back when you felt a knot on your abdomen. His hand on your throat does something to you that you can’t understand, but it feels good. He felt your pussy clenched again around his dick and you finally cum. Hard. But to Yuta’s surprise you were still moving your hips against him trying to overstimulate yourself. He was surprised by your sudden action, it made him catch his sweet release and he cums inside you for the first time.

“Baby stop, I have to remove the condom now” Yuta needed to convince you in order for you to stop moving your hips. Still against his chest and his arms encircled on your waist, you felt your high go down as Yuta place soft kisses on your shoulders whispering telling you to stop. After removing the condom and cleaning you up, he didn’t expect himself to enjoy pillow talks and cuddles after sex. Maybe because its you he’s sleeping with tonight.

“You were kind of wild for a vigin. Does it hurt?” He asked looking a bit concerned while snuggling you.

You scoffed, “how can you expect me not to act wild when you fuck me so good Nakamoto Yuta?” you kiss him to lessen his guilt.

“That was the best sex ever. Im afraid I will always ask you to have sex with me from now on” he’s kissing your neck now and checking your folds if you’re still wet.

“Can I ride you?” with wide eyes Yuta stopped what he’s doing completely in shock seeing this side of you.

Yuta accepts your offer and you rode him four times that night using him to go off again and again and again. He was already tired but the view of you bouncing on his cock was so addicting and the feeling of you doing all the work because its your request makes him happy that you’re comfortable with him.

“I didn’t know you are this wild and needy. I was going easy on you earlier.” he said catching his breath after his third release for the night.

“Its fine, baby. You did great earlier.” you said catching your breath too. You were rocking your hips again, teasing his cock and making him hard again. “oh - ah!- baby you’re going to be the death of me” Yuta complains but he’s gripping your boobs already, making you moan and so turned on. You move your hips again making Yuta crumble beneath you, it makes you proud being the only girl in his life that can ruin him like this. When he close his eyes and just let you do the work, when you’re the one making him beg for more, when he furrow his brows trying to stop himself from cumming, you thought about how these are only for your eyes. And you love him for that.

When you finally stopped and flopped on his chest, Yuta seized this moment to throw the condoms as far away as he can so you wouldn’t have to ask for another round. “Baby aren’t you tired? You do know that we can still have sex after this night right? There’s no need to rush” that made you laugh. You kissed him deeply and thanked him for a beautiful night. “I will never forget this Yuta”

After that night, you and Yuta have sex comfortably whenever you want. Pretty sure you had sex on every corner of his apartment. Sometimes if you’re both lucky Mark walks on the two of you having sex on the couch and all you do is laugh. Poor Mark. Whenever you’re needy, the two of you have a little quickie in Yuta’s apartment before going back to class.

And by the time Yuta finally quit his job, he never used condoms anymore whenever you have sex. It was also the time he decided you’re the one he’s going to spend the rest of his life with. On your fourth year of being together, he talks about marriage comfortably with you. The both of you started to plan out your future together, he said he wanted three kids but he doubts that you two will stop making babies.

2 MONTHS LATER

Yuta was waiting for the nurse to finish changing your IV fluids before talking to you alone like he does everyday. “Baby it’s Jaehyun’s birthday today. I’m going to his house tonight with the guys and you know have fun like teenagers.” Yuta jokes while combing your hair.

“Its Valentines day too so, I got you a present.” He opens a red velvet box beside him and put the ring on you. He was supposed to propose to you on Valentines day to make it extra special but unfortunate events happened.

“Will you marry me?” it broke his heart hearing you not say a word. But he knew you will say yes.

“Please wake up, so you could say ‘yes’ already, okay? I’ll be back tonight, I love you.” he kissed you on the lips leaving some tears on your cheeks and heads out.

Yuta was hesitating to set foot on Jaehyun’s house because this was the last place you went to before the accident happened. He tried not to think about what happened but he can’t help it. When Jaehyun finds Yuta on his doorstep, he was quick to hand Yuta a bottle of beer and told him to enjoy the party just like old times.

It was nice having fun after being so stressed and sad with life lately Yuta thought, he felt alive again tonight. Playing beer pongs, drinking beers with the guys, dancing under loud music. He missed being this alive.

He felt his phone vibrating, he got nervous and quickly looked for a quiet place to answer Mark’s call.

“Hello. I’m at Jaehyun’s its too loud everywhere. What’s up?”

“Hyung… She’s awake”

Yuta left the party immediately and rushed back to the hospital. Your room was crowded with nurses and doctors, and your whole family is present. When Yuta stepped inside the room he cant believe you’re sitting and talking in front of his eyes. But why does it feel like you’re not excited to see him? He felt scared when Mark brought him outside the room and told him he has something to say.

“Hyung… She remembers the accident” Mark breathes in deeply, “But she doesn’t remembers you”

In that moment he felt his legs give up on him as if it forgot how to carry him upon hearing the news. He felt a little dizzy but not because of the alcohol he had from the party. It’s too much he thought. He left Mark and decided he would like to be alone for a minute. Thinking of a way how he can handle his feelings when you finally saw him and you don’t recognise him.

After three cups of coffee at the hospital’s cafeteria, Mark talked to him again. Trying to be careful with his words, he tried to explain what you remember and what’s left with your memories about Yuta. Just like Yuta, Mark was heart broken.

“We asked her whats her last memory” Mark started, destroying the tissue in front him piece by piece. “She told us about the accident, but not in detail. And that her last memory before the accident is… our trip to Paris” Mark looks at Yuta finally, “And hyung… We went to Paris three days before you guys met” Yuta was feeling sick again, he wanted to cry in front of Mark.

“But” Mark added “she remembers tiny scenarios flashing in her mind, she told the doctor something about tattoos? Do you know something about it?”

For the first time at that moment, Yuta smiled. She remembers, but not entirely, but still.

“That memory was two years ago. She was forcing me to have matching tattoos with her but I didn’t want to because of my work. And she put up a fight, throwing everything she sees at me. She didn’t know that the work that I was talking about was my internship” Mark let out a small laugh hearing the story, how stupid of you for getting mad over matching tattoos.

It was quiet for some time, maybe the both of them are still digesting what’s happening right now. Nonetheless they were both thankful that you’re finally awake. Mark brought Yuta back to your room, and left him to face you alone. Not sure what will happen when you finally see him. It will hurt Yuta, but he wanted to see you already.

The room was cold and Yuta caught you shivering when he entered the room. He gave you his blanket that he kept in the room whenever he stays over and take care of you. “Hey” he greets you softly, “This is mine, you can have it” you took the blanket with a small smile. A smile that Yuta craves to see, and it made him fell in love with you again.

You don’t recognise his face but you recognised his voice. You sat while you watch him play with his own fingers. The air in the room became colder. You heard him clear his throat and you looked at him again.

“Do you want to say something?” you asked trying to get him comfortable.

“Do you know me?” Yuta asked even though he already knew the answer.

“No.. but your voice is something I hear when I was sleeping. Are you a nurse or something?” Yuta was glad that you can actually hear all that he said to you when you were sleeping. He chuckled and points at the small table beside the hospital bed. Just near the fresh flowers you can see your college diploma, your journal, several pictures of your family and friends, and pictures with the guy sitting across the room.

“I’m Yuta” he introduced himself to you for the second time in his life and that left a sting on his heart. Trying to hold back his tears, he saw you play with the engagement ring that he gave you earlier today.

“I’m sorry If I don’t remember you Yuta. But I will work hard to-“ he came closer to you with a slight panic, asking permission if he could hold your hand. You let him.

“You don’t have to do that. Yes its hard for me but I know its harder for you” he puts his forehead on yours, arms encircling around you and gentle swaying you. Everything this guy do is too much for you, you wanted to push him because he’s basically a stranger in your eyes. But you knew all too well that he’s not a stranger to your heart.

On the next day, your parents talked to Yuta about how you should live your life when you get discharged from the hospital. They were kind enough to consider Yuta to take care of you and for that he was thankful. Knowing all too well that living with him will be hard for you, but he promised himself that he will be strong for the both of you.

“but” your father started and Yuta got nervous all of a sudden.

“We asked her if she wants to live with you and go on with her normal life with you. We also explained to her that that’s the best option… but she didn’t want to. And that’s her final decision” Yuta was once again feeling weak and unable to move after hearing your father’s explanation.

“Yuta, we want her to be well. Everyone does. That’s why we should talk to her even more, and convince her to live with you” your mother added, being hopeful that Yuta would convince you to live with him.

In your four years of being together, Yuta never forced you to do something you don’t want. Even when it comes to the smallest things like if you don’t want his shoes inside your shared bedroom, he complies. Yuta knew you so well that he trusts every decision you make. That’s why he explains to your parents that he can’t force you to live with him. “We all love her. I think, we should respect her decision” those are Yuta’s final words to your parents. They didn’t have any choice but to agree with Yuta. But your parents think Yuta deserves to be with you too. They told him to come see you tonight before they leave first thing in the morning and that he’s welcome to visit you anytime if he wants to.

For the last time, Yuta visits your room while you were sleeping. Sitting on your hospital bed carefully not to wake you. He strokes your soft hair, memorising your features more.

“I will never forgive myself. I should’ve taken care of you, baby it’s my job. I should have pinned you down instead of just telling you not to ride that motorcycle with Lucas” he cries again, pouring everything out. “I’m sorry if none of our dreams will come true. But I know you will live happily even without me baby. Just promise me you’ll never be sad or cry over something or someone. I could’ve been the one making you happy forever but, we can’t force anything to happen now.”

He slowly caress your arm, down to your hand. Kissing it several times, your hands became wet because of his tears. With a heavy heart, Yuta slowly takes off your engagement ring.

“I will never forget you. Thank you for making half of my life as beautiful as your face” he forced to let out a giggle, and quietly leaves the room with a broken heart. ................................................. Masterlist Hey there! If you’re at this point I would like to thank you for reading this. If you have any comments or questions, in between scenarios I’m more than happy to answer them :) Talk to me! I want to make new friends.

#nct-writers #neowritingsnet #nct fic #kpop fic #nct smut #nct fluff #nct angst #fluff #angst #smut #nakamoto yuta #nct yuta #yuta #nct au #nct scenarios

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istgimamess · 4 years

Text

Moodboard Ship(s): NCT and TXT...

🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿

"...hiii my love !! how are you ? i hope you're well ashaja it is now my turn to threaten so yes you better be well or else 🔪 aahha.

may i get a moodboard ship with nct and txt please ? if not two then either of them is fine love !! thank you so muchh you're absolutely an angel and im so happy to have you as a friend. we need to talk more truly..."

🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿

In NCT I ship you with...

Jaehyun!

Your moodboard:

“Why do I get the feeling our relationship is backwards?” he asks as he wanders into your room, shrugs his jacket off, and hangs it over the back of your desk chair. You stare at his back, perplexed. Why was he here? “Isn’t it usually the girl who always wants to talk about feelings and the guy who bottles everything up inside?” he continues, his words finally catching up to you. Relationship? Feelings?

“I don’t bottle things up,” you shoot back, unable to clearly process the deeper meaning behind his words. Well, there is an imaginary box you like to hide things in, but that’s different—you think, in afterthought. “Right.” he responds, concurring. You can practically taste the sarcasm, his usual honey-like voice dripping with it.

“Why—” you clear your throat, “Why are you here?” There’s a brief pause—not too long, but still long enough for your palms to begin to garner sweat. “Give me the setting sun, and I’ll be a richer man than most.” his voice is soft, almost as if he’s whispering. His hand reaches back in a swift motion, and he’s pulling off his shirt. As pure reflex you lower your gaze, but not before catching sight of his wings. They flutter momentarily, the sheer pink reflection catching in the setting sun. “For never have I seen gold like that which glows above the earth. Give me the night sky, and I’ll be the richest man for sure. For never have I seen diamonds like those that dance beside the moon.” he continues, back still facing you. You just barely recognize the scripture, fae are an ancient breed who take tradition very seriously. They have scriptures for everything—some more important than others. Your gut tells you this specific scripture is important. You begin to panic, wracking your brain for any clue as to what he’s saying to you—what he means.

And that’s when you see it, tucked beneath his left shoulder blade, almost hidden by his wing. A tattoo. Tattoos, to fae specifically, are much more than body art. They’re not meant for fun, they’re a declaration. A promise. A vow. You swallow your shock, narrowing your eyes to get a better look at the art. It’s small, delicate—but it also sticks out amongst his smooth, wide back. You open your mouth to question him but your words die in place, your tongue suddenly feels thick, heavy in your mouth. It’s your name—the intricate design, the complex lines. This was more than a friend showing another friend some body art. This was a confession of the highest degree. A confession a fae of royalty should not be making to a simple human.

“That’s incredible, Jaehyun. It is. But—" you swallow loudly in the quiet room, your heart jumping erratically in your chest.

“No." He turns around. "No buts. You think I'm going to hurt you? You think I'm going to get bored and run off with some undergrounder, some fairy, the first chance I get?” his eyes are piercing, dark with frustration. “You obviously have no idea how amazing you are. You are incredible, and I want you.” you take a step back, suddenly overwhelmed by his proximity, what he’s saying. “Every part of you. I want your stubbornness and your sarcasm and your competitive spirit. I want you challenging me and fighting beside me.” His large hands settle around your shoulders, pulling you closer. You resist—holding your hand on his chest—keeping him at a distance. What if one of the guards saw? “I want to hold you and kiss you and so much more because there's no one else in the world who knows me like you do. You have always been the one for me, even when we couldn't stand each other.” he lowers his voice, and suddenly everything becomes much more intimate. “You're beautiful, and you're more intelligent than any fairy I've met. It just feels right when you're beside me. It feel like I've been lost in the desert for years, and...I've finally come home.” he finishes, winded like he’s ran a marathon.

His dark eyes trace your features, gently removing your hand from his chest, closing the distance between you slowly. And, instead of fighting it like you should, you close your eyes and let yourself go. You feel the muscles of his shoulder beneath your hand. The frame his arms create is strong, secure, but you want those arms tighter around you. You want there to be no space at all between you.

As if reading your mind, he closes the distance. Tilting your chin up—his lips drawing you in—your breath becoming one. You want him so badly. You want to kiss him, laugh with him, cry with him, share every waking moment of your life with him because no matter how many awful things he's done in the past, you can't shake the undeniable feeling that when his arms are around you, you’re home.

🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿

In TXT I ship you with...

Beomgyu!

Your moodboard:

“I have stolen princesses back from sleeping barrow kings. I burned down the town of Trelon. I have spent the night with the Duke of Death and left with both my sanity and my life.” he’s ranting now, his wide eyes holding you in place, hands frantically waving about. “I was expelled from the University at a younger age than most people are allowed in. I tread paths by moonlight that others fear to speak of during the day. I have talked to gods, slept with sirens, and written songs that make the minstrels weep.” you cock your eyebrow, patiently waiting for him to get to the point.

“You have to have heard of me.” he balks at your impassive expression.

“Your highness,” you resist the urge to roll your eyes. “I know who you are, I just don’t care.” The absolute shock that momentarily paints his handsome features has you holding back a laugh. “But—” now you do roll your eyes, already bored with the conversation.

“Your highness, I’m here to teach you—not indulge your ego. You’re going to be king soon—” he cuts you off, abruptly. “I do not wish to be king.” there’s an edge to his voice, a hard set to his jaw. You take a deep breath. “That doesn’t change the fact that you will be.” There’s a dark, forlorn and almost heartbreaking look in his eyes—it’s sudden and it’s gone as fast as it appeared—but it’s enough to stop you in your tracks. You swallow down the insult that was steadily making its way up your throat and you look at him, really look. Despite all of his accomplishments, if you wish to call sharing a chamber with a siren an accomplishment, he still just a kid. And suddenly your heart hurts for him,

“I once knew a troll who was heir to the throne of a great kingdom, he lived as a ranger and fought his destiny to sit on a throne but in his blood he was a king.” you say offhandedly, gazing out the large window to the east woodlands. You can feel the snap of his gaze on you. “I also knew a fae who was the king of a small kingdom, it was very small and his throne very humble.” you smile to yourself, remembering how delighted you were to meet such a respectable court. “He and his people were all brave and worthy conquerors.”

He takes a step towards you, you feel his eyes settle on your own—but you keep your gaze resolutely out the window. “And I knew a vampire who sat on a magnificent throne of a big and majestic kingdom, but he was not a king at all, he was only a cowardly steward.” you confessed quietly, suddenly overwhelmed by the memory of such a cruel ruler. Your eyes must reflect your feelings on the matter because the prince steps in front of you, cutting off your line of sight to the great woods. “Why are you telling me this?” he questions, his tone lowered to match yours.

You finally concede, looking up and catching his eyes. “Because I want you to know. You will be the king of a great kingdom, human or not—whether you want it or not—you will be the king, even if you live in naivety.” His gaze darkens as you turn around and reach for a book on the 9 woodland kingdoms, the kingdoms you’re meant to teach the prince about, thoroughly; the book is old and worn, it smells like burnt leaves. “My lady, I did not think you could answer it.” his voice cuts through the sudden silence. You tilt your head in his direction, for the first time, curious. “Answer what?” you voice, confusion etched in your features.

“Your calling, of course. When my father took you from your home without your leave—and set value only on your gift—I questioned your knowledge on the subject matter at hand.” he rounds the table, holding your gaze hostage. “But I am answered truly. You have given fair return for insult thrice over and set your worth: higher than my life and all my kingdom and all who live therein.”

He comes to a stop in front of you, yet again, this time much closer than before. “And though you can send my people to the fire, I can claim no debt to repay. It would be justly done.” his whispered words catch you off guard—the implication, the suggestion of a confession. You drop the book you’re holding, the noise echoing through the barren halls.

🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿

@urirealvibekiller omggg you're sooo sweet 😍😭 I'm going to cryyy. But also? That knife threat sENT ME hahhahaa 😂

And no, YOUR an absolute angel! I can't get over how pretty you areeeee! Teach me your ways! 🥺

Lol I hope you like your moodboard ship(s) — It started out one way, and then I randomly got inspired by a fantasy cottage-core advertisement lmfaoooo sorry! 🥰

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daphneallard · 4 years

Text

of good samaritans & pawns

@diveronarpg submitted:

DIANA has managed to establish a Robin Hood-esque reputation for herself among the Capulets and make it look graceful, even when confronted with more difficult decisions. It just so happens that a week ago, a Capulet soldier reached out to DAPHNE looking for financial aid on her part, begging for help in getting out of the city and away from the mob that they’ve both dedicated their livelihoods to. This sort of thing does not occur often, and could give her a significant advantage or a severe shortfall. What does DAPHNE do?

MENTIONED: @lavolumnia, @reginadalys, @dukemassetti, @stlapin, @la-bella-falco

TW: death, violence, grief, dark themes

There are approximately 590,452 things Daphne Allard doesn’t know about Luca Caprio, but here are five in particular.

1. His sister’s name is Marta; they’ve barely spoken in three years. Not because of anything serious, but Marta lives in Berlin and the two have just never found the time to put in the effort.

2. When he was seven, he wanted to take over his grandfather’s bakery. It burned down when he was 14. The arsonist’s were never caught, but everyone whispered that his nonno had offended a Montague of some power and status.

3. Luca went to university in Milan.

4. He professed not to care about astrology, but he knew he was a Cancer Sun, a Leo Rising, and a Scorpio Moon because a date made him check. After he showed her his co--star account, she went to the bathroom and never came back.

5. He deserved better.

Actually, she knew that last one. Counting that, Daphne knew precisely ten things about Luca Caprio.

1. LUCA IS A CAPULET.

A soldato, more specifically. Daphne was hosting a small get-together for the initiates and soldiers. A sort of networking opportunity, if you will. A chance to feel like family. That was how this city worked – blood ties and bloodied ties, invisible strings wrapped around every citizen’s throat. It was a reminder that everyone in this city is connected with a vice grip.

They were only able to do what they did because people felt like they were getting something in return – a mirage of a family, if you will. But Daphne wasn’t truly cynical – it was good for them to spend some time together outside of work. Make each other feel less alone.

She didn’t remember Luca very well. He hadn’t been quiet because she’d gone and put a friendly arm around the wallflowers and made them feel welcome, and she would’ve remembered him. He hadn’t been particularly loud, because she would’ve remembered him. He ran in the middle, and he seemed happy enough.

Daphne remembered he wasn’t an initiate though. “I’m a soldier,” he’d told her when she asked, not in the least offended that she didn’t remember him. “I ‘graduated’ after the Castelvecchio blew up.”

Before they count continue their conversation, Elisabetta – a lanky, freckled initiate, barely 19 – gathered up the courage to speak to her. “Signora Allard, can I speak to you in private?” The muscles in her shoulder tensed up, like she was expecting to be slapped. Daphne had told Luca she’d catch up with him later – she wanted to know everyone, and said it in a way that convinced everyone, even Daphne herself, that it was true, and to come to her if he needed anything – and pulled Elisabetta into a spare room.

In which she’d promptly burst into tears. She needed help – an orphan with no family and no fortune, a cruel landlord who let her apartment become infested with cockroaches and threatened to evict her, and could Daphne help her? Of course, darling. That’s what I’m here to do.

Daphne hired someone to break the landlord’s legs and gave Elisabetta the downpayment for a newer, nicer apartment, and a day job as a barista at a cafe her father invested in. Just something to help you get settled, until you decide what you want to do for your day job. No, no need to pay me back. This is a gift, Elisabetta. When you decide what you want to do, let me know and I can put you in touch with people.

2. LUCA BELIEVED IN GOD

The boy was Catholic. He believed in the rituals. He was spiritual, too. Luca managed to find the balance that many spent their lives in fruitless pursuit of. His eyes lit up when he talked about it – something about how he saw himself as a prodigal son – and sure, Daphne thought it was a little naive, but perhaps that was her own envy.

She could never feel at peace with the Heavens – and not just because of the blood and poison and atrocities hidden underneath a kind smile and an impeccable reputation. Whatever was in the skies, whatever or whoever governed the universe didn’t care for mortals who tried to fashion themselves as folly.

Her heart sang when he’d shyly brought up that he heard what she did for Elisabetta, who mentioned to him that she’d done something similar for a Vittorio, for Massimo, for Charlotte, for Honoria, and so-on and so-forth. “You’re like a Good Samaritan,” Luca said. Daphne liked that.

Good Samaritans don’t want their pound of flesh, though.

She became concerned about Luca, though. Believers were difficult, and in all honesty, Catholic guilt was going to catch up with him sooner or later.

The worries started after they’d gutted that spiare in the Cathedral. Her name was Valentina Gallo, and she mattered to someone, but the only memory Daphne had was of her bleeding out in the hallowed halls. It’s quite cruel, for the only memory you have of a person to be the light dimming from their eyes.

Luca had been late to a few meetings, and his captain had complained to Daphne – not anything specific, only in passing. Daphne had assured them that she’d take care of it. She’d check in with Luca. He seems like a good soldier. He seems like a good man.

3. LUCA CAME TO HER

She didn’t need to find him. He’d knocked on the door to her office and asked if she had time for a word. Daphne didn’t, but she smiled anyways and invited him inside, offering him his choice of water, coffee, or tea. Good seeds get overrun by weeds if they’re not taken care of.

“Do you remember Elisabetta?” Luca asked.

Daphne nodded. Of course she did. She could never forget the face of a person who owed her their happiness. “Of course. She’s just started an apprenticeship at All That Glitters.”

He wrung his hands. “Good, good. That’s good.”

She poured him a glass of water and placed it in front of him. “Drink, I insist. You look like you’re about to be sick.”

“I might be.”

But he drank the water and didn’t vomit all over her carpet.

“I’m glad you came to see me, today. I’ve heard some colleagues express concern about you. It’s been....a long few months for all of us.” She brushed her hair out of her face, “Can I do something to help? Even if you just need to talk, I want you to know that I’m here for you.”

4. LUCA DIDN’T LIKE BEING A CAPULET

But only because he told her.

“I don’t like being a Capulet.” That was the most confident she’d ever heard it. Not a doubt in his mind. She could see it in his eyes that he meant.

“Oh,” was all she could say. What else could she do? After a moment, Daphne got her wits about her and knitted her fingers together. “Is there something in particular that you don’t like?”

“All of it. Well, not all of it. I -- it’s complicated, you know?” Daphne nodded, because she did. “But when I joined, I thought I would be doing something good for the city.”

To that, she was quick to respond. “You are.”

“How?”

“The Capulet’s are involved with a number of charitable organizations – we’ve helped more than a few local businesses get on their feet and stay on their feet through hard times. I personally work with several local women’s shelters. If you want to do more work in that field, than you’ve certainly come to the right person. Here, let me --”

He’d cut her off, “It doesn’t matter. None of it matters when we do things like what we did in the Cathedral.” Daphne fixed with a stony look and Luca stopped talking mid-sentence. “Sorry, Signora Allard. I didn’t mean to interrupt you.”

She softens, because Daphne isn’t cruel and that’s what he needed to see – that this work doesn’t make as monsters. “It’s alright, Luca. Really. I’m here to listen.” She takes a deep breathe. “You’ve made a vow to the Capulet’s, Luca, and the particular vow you’ve made....it’s not an easy one to break. I understand that you’re scared and frustrated and, well, horrified by what you’ve seen. We all should be. It’s normal, you know, for newer members to get cold feet.” She twists her engagement ring around her finger. “Like a bride before the wedding.”

“It’s more than jitters,” he says, desperate to make her understand. “I’m telling you that I can’t live like this anymore. I can’t.” She puts her hand over his, and gives it a squeeze.

“I understand.” She said it with her whole heart.

“Can you help me then?”

5. WHEN LUCA MADE UP HIS MIND, IT WAS MADE

Daphne didn’t give an answer to his last question. Instead, she’d asked what exactly he was asking of her. How much have you thought about this, boy? How badly do you want this?

“There’s someone I know in Rome who can help me get the papers to start a new life.”

“Where are you thinking of going?”

“Athens, Berlin, or Marseilles – you went to school there, didn’t you?”

“Those are all rather different. I went to school in Paris, but I spent quite a lot of time in Marseilles. It’s beautiful. You would like it.”

“After that, I would need help getting housing and a job. I’d also need my identity scrubbed – I, uh, I don’t know what I should do there. Faking my death is an option, but that seems a bit much.”

“And you would what me to contribute financially?”

Luca nods vigorously. “Yes – about €60,000.” Daphne doesn’t blink at the sum; that’s mere change to the Allard fortune and to all of her personal investments.

“That’s a pretty penny,” Daphne says. She’s not talking about the money. She’s talking about the task. “Luca, this conversation – I’m more than happy to let this stay between us and do everything in my power to help you feel comfortable with your position in the Capulet’s, but if this is serious and it comes out that I knew someone was consider desertion....”

“This can’t be the worst thing someone’s done in Verona. Orsino, Reagan, Cosimo, Volumnia, Iago, Othello, Lady Macbeth – This can’t be the worst thing anyone’s been asked.” Oh, you darling, sweet, stupid boy. “You’ve helped others who needed...a higher price tag, though. I --- I wouldn’t ask unless I was serious. And I’ve thought about, signora. This is what I need to do. I need to leave this city, even if I have to bury Luca Caprio to do it.”

“I see how much this means to you, but --” His eyes widen like a deer stuck in headlights. His arm twitches, and he almost reaches for his gun, but steadies himself. “Don’t worry, I’m going to help you, Luca. Of course I am. It’ll just take some time for me to get the funds in order and distribute them to you secretly and safely.”

6. LUCA’S SMILE WAS BLESSED BY THE HEAVENS

Don’t worry. I’m going to help you, Luca. The boy audibly exhales and slumps in the chair, almost trembling. It’s then that she notices how deep the bags under his eyes are. Some bodies aren’t meant to bare the weight of the world – or their decisions – on their shoulders, Daphne thinks sadly.

Then, he starts laughing and smiling and crying – but it’s all happy tears and relief. His smile makes Daphne wish she was as good of a person as he thought her to be. “A Good Samaritan,” he mumbles, still trying to process everything. “You’re a rare breed in Verona.”

Daphne thinks of the Capulet ranks – how many twisted and lied and killed for no reason other than their own personal gain, or their own ego’s. She thinks of everyone in Verona who looks at life like a chess game – rook takes bishop, protect the queen, pawn to queen, sacrificial pieces. Those who shuffle the board so that it suits whatever their interests are. Daphne’s one of them, and she knows it, even if she’ll never admit it. I wish I was a rare breed, Luca.

7. LUCA DECIDED ON BERLIN

Three days later, Luca’s captain lets her know that he’s been on time and that he seems like the soldier is back on track. “What changed?” Daphne had asked. “I don’t know,” the captain admits. “He said he talked to you, so I guess whatever you said helped.”

Later that evening, Luca returns and asks her how long it will take her to get everything together. “A few more days, at least. Have you decided where you’re going to go?”

“Berlin.” He says it with such conviction, and Daphne is scared to ask what made him decide to go there, lest it make her miss the boy too much. “How long will it take to get everything ready for me to go to Berlin?”

“Two days. I have a good friend there, actually. She’s good. Very discreet. And she owes me a favor. I can give you her address? That way you know someone in the city, at least.”

“That’d be perfect.”

“What’s the name of your Rome contact? The one who can help you get new documents?”

“Alessandro Marino...do you know him?”

Daphne nods, “By reputation, primarily. As far as people in his field go, Alessandro is one of the more...ethical ones. You’re in good hands with him.”

8. LUCA CAPRIO WAS GOING TO CHANGE HIS NAME TO LUKAS SCHMIDT

"How quickly can Alessandro get you the new papers?”

“I’ve already paid him half.” Off Daphne’s quizzical expression, he adds, “It cost all my savings. After I told him I was good for the rest and that you were helping me --” Idiot, Daphne thinks. “-- he’s agreed to messenger me the documents by the end of tomorrow.”

“Are you still going to be called Luca?”

“No, something similar though. That’s what’s best, right? In the movies, they always give someone a fake name that’s close with their real name so they don’t get confused.”

“Daphne, Diana. Bernadette, Bianca. Vivianne, Volumnia. Same practices goes for the aliases here. It makes sense. What’s the name?”

He hesitates. “Schmidt. Lukas Schmidt.”

“Pleased to meet you, Signor Lukas....did you tell anyone else?”

“Of course not. I’m not an idiot.”

9. LUCA BELIEVED IN DAPHNE ALLARD

She didn’t need him to tell her. She could see it in the way that he looked at her adoringly, like she was a guardian angel. A Good Samaritan, he’d called her. A Good Samaritan, he thought her to be. A Good Samaritan. A good person.

There was something good in Luca that didn’t exist in Daphne. Something normal about him. He lived by a different set of rules that she couldn’t even begin to fathom, and she knew that. Luca was a good boy. She doesn’t know why she keeps calling him a boy when he’s 25 years old.

He is good. Not wise, but good. And good people always pay their debts. With this, he would owe her everything – his freedom, his happiness, his life. This kind of power, this kind of debt was the most powerful. Daphne could get him to do anything in the future.

This was why she became a Capulet. To help people.

It was quite a pity, though, that by the nature of this arrangement, the only thing Daphne couldn’t ask him to do was stay.

10. LUCA DIDN’T SEE IT COMING.

The second he asked her to help him leave, Daphne knew she would sign his death warrant. After he told her that he told Alessandro that she was helping him, Daphne knew she would need to oversee a larger clean-up operation. It wasn’t worth the risk. No matter how well she did the money, someone would find it. Her name and reputation wouldn’t protect her. And Daphne was many things, but she was not a fool.

It appeared that Luca was true to his word in that he told no one else about his decision to leave. That was the conclusion Daphne came to after using the Capulet pipeline to find a hacker who gave her access to his phone, computer, and all CCTV footage. No text messages, no phone calls, no late night meetings in his apartment or anywhere else in the city. Of course, as a precaution, she’d gotten someone – someone loyal – to trail him just to make sure.

Daphne Allard was no Good Samaritan. She was a Capulet.

Luca couldn’t have known that. Daphne didn’t want anyone to know of the rot inside of her. This decay was her problem, and no one else’s, and both she and the city had bigger problems than this. No one needed to know.

Daphne had informed his captain and the appropriate higher up’s of the upcoming defection. No one needed to remind her that the cost of treason was death. She remembered the Gallo girl’s fate. No, I’ll take care of the details, she offered. He came to me, so I will deal with it.

He comes to see her before he departs. She tells him she’s wired the money to his new account. She hasn’t. She kisses him on the cheek, before sending him on his way. Luca Caprio doesn’t make it two miles out of the city before a masked assailant shoots him in the back of the head.

It was a quick, clean death, Daphne tells herself, as she pays the hitman handsomely for the cleanup of Luca Caprio, Alessandro Marino, and the messenger who made the mistake of delivering the documents.

This is mercy, she thinks. This way he and his family get to keep his dignity and the Capulet’s are spared the embarrassment.

She helps pay for his funeral, but doesn’t attend. Daphne doesn’t know this, but when the priest informs Luca’s parents that everything has been taken care of, his mother wept and thanked the Lord. There’s still Good Samaritans in Verona, she had said through her tears. There’s still good.

“If they ask, can I reveal their benefactor?” The priest had asked her when she stopped by to drop off the payment.

“No, not this time, father.” She doesn’t see the benefit of having this family owe her. Maybe later, if it proves useful, she will reveal herself. But Daphne doesn’t see the advantage. Your son is dead and I paid for the funeral. The debt is paid. You owe me nothing.

There’s a sixth thing Daphne knows about Luca: He died thinking well of her. It gives her comfort. It shouldn’t. But it does.

Verona makes a different sort of monster out of everyone. This was the monster it had made of Daphne Allard.

#&. muse | i will answer to knife #self para #tw death #tw dark themes #tw violence #i...have zero idea if i did this right #but ? uh #this happened?#tw grief

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bellatrixobsessed1 · 4 years

Text

Chasing Fyre

This hot mess of a fic is brought to you by this hot mess of a discussion.

Azula lays in the grass, staring up at the sun...the moon? She isn’t sure what she is staring at, but it is an orb and it is in the sky. What she is looking at is neither the sun nor the moon, but a paper lantern that sways in the breeze. This is boundlessly alarming for the princess because she has never seen the sun move like that. Usually the sun sits in a fixed position. Perhaps, she decides, she isn’t looking at the sun at all. Perhaps she is looking at Sozin’s Comet coming back because it too knows that she has been cheated out of her crown. Azula grins, this time, she will have victory! But then it dawns upon her that she has never seen a comet hang in one place for so long.

She rubs her head, it is beginning to ache. She takes another hit from her cactus juice joint. It has been prescribed to her to calm her anxieties and alleviate her stresses. Though they advised her to use it only in moderation. Which had been going well until she’d met that weird flying monkey thing. She should have known not to trust it, it is after all, the Avatar’s pet. But she had run out of her medicinal cactus juice so she didn’t refuse when the creature perched itself on the window and said in a voice that was alarmingly deep for a creature so small, “five gold pieces and I’ll get you the stuff.”

“Just this once, lemur.” She had vowed.

“You can call me M0m0. But with two zeros instead of O’s.”

“Just this once, lemur.” She had repeated as she fished out five gold pieces.

As fate will have it, the lemur’s cactus juice is much stronger than the medically regulated joints she is used to. And so the princess finds herself unfathomably and helplessly high as fuck. She flops down and tries to remember where the hell she is and how the hell she has managed to free herself from that institution again. Especially considering how heavily they have cracked down since her last escape. She wracks her brain but each blade of grass around her has something to say.

“You’re pretty, Azula.” “You have nice eyes!” “Those asylum robes look great on you!” “You deserved to be fire lord.” “You are the fire lord.”

At this, Azula perks up. “I am?”

“You are to me.” That particular strand of grass gushes. She smiles at the strand and plucks it from the ground. It grows silent. She has killed it. She begins to cry softly to herself. Another friend lost.

.oOo.

“We’ve decided to try something different with her.” The head doctor speaks.

“What are you trying?” Zuko asks.

“Medicinal cactus juice.” The man replies.

“And…” Zuko prompts.

“It was going well.”

“Until…”

“It stopped going well.” The doctor smiles nervously.

“Can I see her?” Zuko asks.

“Ah...well, that’s part of the problem. You seeeeee….she...uh...she escaped.”

“Escaped!?” Zuko throws his hands up. “Have you started looking for her.”

“We have not. But we think that we know where to start.” He pauses. “The princess has grown quite fond of Chong & The Singing Nomads.”

Zuko curses to himself. He and Mai have had several discussions already and they have already decided that they would be staying far, far away from that crowd and their bad hair and lack of hygiene. And their overly lax mannerisms and their constant spouting of peace and love bullshit. Both he and Mai are well aware that peace is for Air Nomads and love is dumb. They do not love each other, they simply not hate each other. “You don’t really think that she went there do you?”

The doctors trade glances. “We think that she did.”

.oOo.

“Do it, Azula, follow your dreams.” The remaining blades of highly motivational grass chant. “Achieve your goals!”

Azula, feeling highly lethargic, stands up anyhow. With each enthusiastic encouragement, the princess finds herself feeling more inspired even if she’d rather lay back down and stare at the swaying sun.

“You can do it!” Shouts a blade of grass that sounds like it belongs to a burly earthbender. It sounds that way, because it had come from an earthbender. The Boulder to be specific, he is shouting at Toph as she tries to deadlift Appa who is being ridden by Raava. But Azula does not know this, so she attributes it to the blades of grass. And she decides that she will. She will go out and do what she had escaped to do. What she had always wanted to do. What she had been born to do! She is going to meet her favorite band and she is going to join them!

She supposes that this is much easier said than done considering how many bands are in attendance.

.oOo.

The scent of incense hangs heavily in the air. A breeze rustles the beaded curtains that act as the tent’s door. Moku leans back, humming to himself.

“C’mon man.” Chong drawls. “We just need one more good joint, man. And we’ll write one more jam it’ll be totally groovy, man.”

“I don’t grow for free.” Momo scowls. “Do you know how hard it is to ditch that bald headed, twinkly toed, monk?”

“It’s godda be tough, man.” Chong admits.

“I gotta act like a muffin...a complete square. If my homies saw me prancing with that loser they wouldn’t ride with me anymore. So when I grow, I gotta make bank. I ain’t makin’ bank with you.”

“Bummer, man. Listen, just hang tough and in the mean time pass us another joint and you can jam with us.”

Momo pulls out a glock. “You pay up or Imma cap yer ass.”

“What a downer.” Says Lily.

.oOo.

Azula wanders aimlessly, she has been wandering for some twenty minutes now. Though she has not made it very far. She circles the same tent for the fourteenth time now; she does not realize that it is the same tent because every time she makes a lap around it the design shifts.

Azula frowns and folds her arms over her chest. And then she extends her arm. She crosses them over her chest again. She extends her arm once more. “Arms are weird.” She says to herself. She bends and unbends her arm several times. “We-eird.” She whispers in a lazy sing-long.

She shakes her head, she has to stay focused. She looks around. The place is disorientingly crowded. People sit shoulder to shoulder on checkered blankets. They braid each other’s hair and weave flower crowns. Some make bead jewelry and others make love.

Azula narrows her eyes, just who makes love while wearing socks. She tip toes up to the woman and tugs her socks off.

“Hey! What are you doing!?” The woman shouts.

Azula bolts. Bolts meaning lightning bolts. She does not run. Running is for lil’ bitches. And Azula isn’t a lil’ bitch expect for when her therapist brings up her mother then she is kinda, in fact, a lil’ bitch. At the very least, she cries like one.

Having freshly charred a woman, Azula wanders off. She is carried on a cloud of music. Music! Her objective comes back to her.

.oOo.

“Welcome to Fyre Fest, the Fyre Nation’s most far out festival!” Guru Pathik greets. “Onion and banana juice?”

“No thanks.” Zuko grumbles. He wishes that Mai would have come along, but he could convince her to ‘enter that hippie hell land’. He’d even snagged some My Chemical Romance tickets from another dimension entirely and she still sent him off on his own.

He looks around. In ever direction is some new monstrosity and none of them are Azula. He sees men and women running around with their bits exposed, the more conservitive of them place leaves and flowers but just enough of them to cover what needs covering. He sees men with long hair staring into lava lamps that they heat and bend themselves. Across the way a woman offers to predict the future via seeing it in smoke. Zuko is certain that a helping of cactus juice is involved with those visions. But it isn’t what he sees that horrifies him the most; it is what he hears. Pan flutes and harps play out of sync to a singer who may very well be tone def. She bellows a ditty about loving one’s self and loving one’s potted cacti.

He covers his ears. He has to find Azula fast, before she can do something that will have the nation talking. Because if the Fyre Nation citizens get to talking then word will get to his father. And if word gers to father… Zuko shudders, the man is a week away from getting out of prison and if he comes back to his perfect, can-do-no-wrong daughter completely stoned…

.oOo.

Azula wanders towards the music. There are, in fact, many songs playing all at once--most of them come from the various stages or from within the tents. But there are at least two songs that play in Azula’s mind only; these songs are indescribably horrifying they are played at a frequency very low so as to induce a sense of horror and foreboding. But Azula is used to them and has actually taken a liking to them.

She ignores these songs for the time being and tugs open one of the tent flaps. She pushes the beaded curtain aside. It is vacant except for an air of failure and a perfume of incense. Azula can see the failure, it is all around and there is so much of it. So, so much failure. She stumbles back and out of the tent, she trips over a bong and falls on her ass, this doesn’t deter her any. She continues her hasty retreat away from the failure before it can latch onto her again.

It chases her clear across the field. She is so busy looking at the failure behind her that she doesn’t notice the failure in front of her until she collides with him. “Oh, hi Zuzu.” She greets before remembering that it is probably not a good thing that he has found her. Before he can turn around she picks up one of the rugs, lays down, and throws it over herself. It is only large enough to cover her face.

“Azula...” Zuko says through gritted teeth. “What are you doing here?”

“I am not here. I am back at the institution where you left me.”

“You’re right here, I can see you.”

“No you can’t.”

“Yes, I can.”

“No you can’t.”

“Yes I--okay, no, I’m not doing this with you again.” Zuko hisses. “You’re right here in my field of vision.”

Azula does not understand, she is perfectly hidden. Zuko snatches the blanket from her face and she screeches. Zuko winces at the hideous noise. She seizes the opportunity to dash.

.oOo.

“Wait, no!” He hollers.

But Azula is fast, she has always been fast. Why the hell can’t she be clumsy and uncoordinated like every other stoner he has met.

“Hey, man, you need some chase music?” Chong asks. He still has plenty of time before his performance.

Zuko is about to say no, but Chong plucks at his dramyin and begins a fast paced and frenzied tune. As Zuko persues Azula, Chong persues him. Lily chases Chong and chasing Lily is Moku who is being chased by Momo, who is chased by Zhao, who is chased by Vaatu who is trying to drag him back to the depths of hell where he belongs.

Zuko doesn’t notice any of this for he is hyper fixated on Azula who has flung herself into a pile of flower petals and is army crawling towards one of the stages.

“I did it!” Toph shouts loudly. Zuko looks away momentarily to see Toph standing proud, holding Appa above her head, arm pit hair blowing in the breeze. Zuko gags, he has only heard legends about armpit hair that long. He wants to cry. Even if Mai would let him, he couldn’t even grow his pit hair out that long.

.oOo.

Azula smirks to herself, she knew that it was a good idea to sprint past Toph! With Zuzu well and distracted she makes her get away. It is time to begin phase two. Looking back at her brother, she knows that she doesn’t have much time, the shock is already wearing off.

She snatches up a flower crown and a peace sign necklace and takes a seat upon one of the quilts. She gives a loud and forced laugh, “yeah, I totally get it.”

Chan and Ruon-Jian turn to look at the weirdo who has just invited herself into their circle. They don’t remember her arriving at the festival with them, they aren’t even sure if she is real. “What are we doing?” She asks.

“Oh, we’re just hangin’ loose, ya know?” Chan says.

Azula nods but she does not understand. She has not immersed herself in enough Fyer Festival culture to know what that is supposed to mean. She watches Chan pass Ruon a joint. He takes a puff and passes it to the girl next to him.

“You want a hit?” Chan asks when it gets back to him.

“My therapist says that partaking in acts of violence is detrimental to my healing process.” Is what she would have said if she weren’t so high. What she does say, because she is high, is, “yeah, sure man.”

“Far out.” Chan nods with a smile. He gives her the joint and then gives her finger guns.

Before she can bring the joint to her lips, Zuko snatches it. Azula frowns. “How did you find me so quickly?”

“First of all, I know that laugh anywhere. Second of all, you walked like two feet away from where you were before!”

“Can I hit you?” She asks.

“Wh-what?” Zuko sputters as Chan leans in and whispers something in her ear.

She nods and says, “oooooh,” and turns back to Zuko. “Do you want a hit?” She holds out the joint.

“No!” He throws his hands up. “I’d rather let you hit me in the face or something.”

Azula frowns to herself, she has to ditch him somehow. She steals another blunt from Chan and takes a drag, in the hopes of getting a burst of inspiration. She watches the smoke trail up to the clouds. She snaps her head back down, she knows that if she looks up now that the clouds will begin to take shape and that she will end up watching them for hours. The smoke alone is hypnotic. She sways drunkenly back and forth with the smoke. The smoke… Her lips curl back into another wicked grin.

She lets a burst of fire erupts in her palm. Zuko gives a jolt and she does to. She thrusts the flame much too close to his face. “Look at this!”

“I see it.” He carefully pushes her hand away, the grimace never leaving it.

“LoOk aT It!!!” She repeats.

“I see it!”

“Why is my fire water?”

“What?”

“Why do I have fire that is water???”

“It’s…”

“wHY DO I HAVE FIRE. THAT IS WATER!?” She asks with more volume. Now she is holding the fire too close to her own face.

“Throw me.” The fire crackles. “Throw me and I’ll set you free.” She launches a ball of fire, it lands upon a tree and bursts into song. Azula gives a lopsided smile. “My fire can sing.” She declares.

“Why don’t we go home where it’s quieter and you can hear it better?” Zuko offers.

Azula chuckles. “I know what you’re trying to do Zuzu. But it’s not going to work because I’m smarter than you.”

“Maybe when you aren’t high.” He mutters.

Without warning she catapults herself into the air using twin jets of fire. She gives a yelp that is equal parts elated and fearful. She has never felt so free. She lands relatively gracefully and continues her mad dash away from her overbearing brother.

Her excitement subsides and she resumes her aimless wandering. She gets the feeling that she has strayed far from where Chong & The Singing Nomads are performing. She is growing anxious, if she misses them then she will miss her chance to make a name for herself. If she can’t sing then how the hell will she leave her mark on the world. If she can’t sing then she will be forgotten by society.

“You can do it.” A blade of grass reminds her.

“I can do it.” She whispers back.

A pungent spicy odor wafts in on the breeze. She doesn’t know where it comes from but it is rather enticing.

.oOo.

Zuko races through the crowd, people try to sell him banana juice, scented candles, butt scratchers, and something that looks curiously like his father’s favorite left sock.

“No thank you!” He says before the next merchant can speak. He is not interested in band T-shirts--he doesn’t even like this kind of music.

“And here I thought that you’d like some honor.”

Zuko comes to a dead halt. “Honor?” he asks. He clenches his fistrs. No. He doesn’t have time for this. He has to find Azula, if he doesn’t than he will lose more honor than he can ever hope to buy.

He makes his way around another tent as the man calls, “wait! It’s buy one get one free.”

He finds his nose graced with an absolutely heavenly aroma. It is strong and spicy and he follows it to a tent brimming with all sorts of luxurious foods. The meats go mostly untouched. That’s how he knows that Azula is not yet fully immersed in Fyer Fest culture, there is still hope for her. She stands by the roast duck with a fist full of fire flakes in her mouth.

He never imagined that her downfall would be a case of the munchies, but he will take a victory where he can get it. She looks up from her snack and makes eye contact. He isn’t sure if the look of horror in her eyes is because he has found her or if it is because he has caught her doing something far less than dignified. She finishes stuffing the flakes into her mouth and darts off.

.oOo.

The sun is on its way down and she knows that she is running out of time. But she no longer remembers what she is running out of time for. She doesn’t think that it matters. Why would it? She has water fire and encouraging blades of grass that say kind things to her in spite of all of her flaws. They also don’t seem to judge her for eating fire flakes in such a barbaric manner.

“Hey, man, you’re gonna miss the show.” Chan says.

“The show?”

He loops his arm in hers and leads her towards the main stage. Azula grins, she will finally get to see Chong & The Singing Nomads and she is going to do it with an absolutely gorgeous hunk of a man. He pats the grass next to him.

Azula takes a seat.

“Fire flakes?”

Decidedly, she still has the munchies, so she takes the bowl.

.oOo.

Zuko doesn’t find his sister again until Chong & The Singing Nomads begin singing their most popular hit. It is at this time that Azula rises. Like a phoenix out of the ashes, she propels herself up on a wave of blue fire. But only until she notices and gets startled by the color of her fire again. “If I’m a waterbender then why am I at Fyer Fest?”

“Because everyone is invited to Fyre Fest.” Chong calls up.

“Everyone?” Azula asks.

“Everyone.” Chong confirms as he plucks his instrument. “We’re all one, man. We’re all the same.”

The crowd claps. Azula claps. Mai does not clap, because she hates this band and she is enraged that Zuko has been gone long enough for her to grow concerned enough to arrive at Fyre Fest and find him.

“You are terrible at this.” She remarks. “It has taken you all day to find Azula and I’m able to find both of you in under ten minutes.”

“Just...just help me get her home!” Zuko practically begs. “She’s a mess and…” His eyes grow wide when he turns his attention back to her.

“Azula, don’t you dare!”

She halts, mid pull, with her hands gripping the hem of her shirt.

“Father will kill me and then he’ll kill you, and then he’ll resurrect me with spirit water and kill me again!”

.oOo.

Azula’s eyes glimmer with delight, she loves a good murder! With that threat in place, she hastily tugs her shirt over her head and tosses it to the side. A steady stream of fire, from her feet holds her up right.

Zuko’s mouth hangs open in shock and horror. “Azula, put your shirt back on.”

She spares it a glance before lighting it on fire. She hated that uniform anyways. She feels so liberated! Everyone else at the festival is naked, she doesn’t know why she shouldn’t be! She has always wanted to feel the heat of her fire upon her bare skin. She is about to pull her pants down when a tendril snakes over her arm. “Don’t do it, princess.”

“Raava?” She asks.

“You will regret this later. Get down from there and go find yourself a shirt.”

She narrows her eyes, “don’t tell me what to do you gaudy, glowing, kite...thing.” She sputters.

Rava, growing tired of the princess’ antics, and already peeved from having to chase Zhao down, swats Azula out of the sky. She lands with a thud and Chong’s drummer plays a quick ‘bu-dum tiss.’

“You’re ruining my dreams!” She shouts at the offending god-kite. “I just wanna be free and no one wants to let me.”

Raava pets her head. “Shhhh...it’s okay. Have some…”

“More cactus juice?” She asks hopefully.

Raava sprouts herself a pair of eyes so that she can shoot the princess a judging stare.

“Don’t look at me like that.” Azula folds her arms across her chest. “You’re just jealous.” She doesn’t know what she thinks Raava is jealous of, but she knows that she is right in her assumption.

.oOo.

Zuko wraps a blanket over Azula’s shoulders. “Let’s get you home.” She allows him to walk her towards the festival’s exit. Now that she is thoroughly exhausted, she is a lot easier to manage. The biggest hassle she puts up is leaning into him as she walks. She does so until he is pretty much carrying all of her weight. “A little help, Mai.”

“Nope.” She replies. “I just came here to watch you struggle.”

“Come on, I have to get her out of here before father finds out.”

Mai shrugs. “Sounds like a you problem.”

.oOo.

“I saw Raava.” Azula murmurs sleepily.

“That’s what happens when you accept drugs from questionable lemurs.” Zuko replies.

“That lemur is the Avatar’s pet.” Azula defends. “I thought that I could trust him. It’s like Mai and TyLee all over again…”

“Don’t make me get your therapist.” Mai threatens.

Azula waves her off. “Raava was really there…”

“And you’re really a waterbender.” Zuko grumbles.

She crosses her arms and pouts. “I hate you.”

“I saved you--both of us--from dad’s wrath!” He declares. “I chased you all over that hippie…”

“Hellscape.” Mai fills in.

“I chased you all over that hippie hellscape, had my eyes assaulted by Toph’s free flowing armpit hair, and denied a chance at buying my honor to save yours.”

For a moment she considers thanking him, he truly didn’t have to go that far to save her dignity. But he is still Zuzu. And she is still his younger sister so she instead replies, “I didn’t ask you to do that.”

“Dad would have killed both of us and you’re not even going to thank me?”

Azula sighs, she supposes that it is good that he didn’t let her embarrass herself and that her reputation and relationship with her father will remain unblemished. “You let me yank my shirt off.”

Zuko sighs. “Okay, most of those people were so high that they won’t even remember…”

“I remember and I was high.”

“Honestly, they’ll probably think that it was part of their trips. As far as they know, you’ve been here the whole time.”

A wave of relief comes over her. “Which means that dad will never find out.”

Little do they know, Ozai has already escaped prison and has been Chong’s drummer the whole time.

.oOo.

Ozai takes a long hit of his cactus juice joint. What a night that had been! And here he had thought that he would disguise himself as a nomad, escape prison, and resume his quest for world domination. And that is just what he intends to do. He is going to conquer the world with far out music and a funky fresh beat.

In his wildest dreams he had never imagined that the singing nomad life is for him. He has already grown the beard and long scraggly hair for it!

“So, man, you gonna talk to that lemur for us?” Chong asks.

Ozai shudders. He has faced the Avatar and has had his bending yanked away from his very soul. He had been given a vision of his death and an afterlife in the most horrific end of the Spirit World. But the fear he had felt then doesn’t compare to how looking into Momo’s eyes makes him feel.

“Nah, man. We’ll just pay up.” Ozai shrugs. “I’ll just get some gold pieces from the palace treasury.” He makes a note to do that after he yells at the absolute messes that he has for children. It is the only way to ensure that they never find out that he had attended Fyre Fest and will attend it again.

He doesn’t want to think too much about that right now. Instead he takes another hit of his joint as Moku threads another daisy into his beard.

#Avatar The Last Airbender #Azula #Zuko #Singing Nomads #Ozai #Crack Fic #Fanfiction

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paladinwife · 4 years

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💍 w edelgard! :>

Goodness I’m so sorry for taking so long! Got caught up in birthday stuff. But I’m always happy to talk about my wife

Going to put under a read more because Long

Where they get married:

In Enbarr. Edelgard brought Mira back to the Empire for their wedding, and there really was no better place than the palace itself.

When they get married ( ie what time of day, what month and season etc. ):

Definitely in Autumn, maybe sometime around Horsebow Moon or Wyvern Moon so the scenery is beautiful and the weather is nice. Mira was particularly insistent on an autumn wedding, and Edelgard was inclined to agree. The wedding is probably held starting in the early evening so they can be bathed in the beautiful colors of sunset and twilight.

What traditions they include ( do they get married under a chuppah and crush a glass, garter toss, ‘something borrowed, something blue,’ etc. ):

Mostly imperial royal wedding traditions! So things like holding the wedding in the palace, letting the celebrations spread into the surrounding town so effectively everyone is invited, Mira getting coronated at the wedding, and so on. Of course, a lot of traditions Edelgard felt were obsolete and didn’t reflect how she saw her role or the empire, so she did away with them, but she really liked the spirit of including the whole empire in the celebrations.

What their wedding cake looks like:

Elegant and delicate. The cake itself is a rose-flavored sponge with a soft pink color, and it is frosted in white and decorated elegantly. It might not be as dramatic as many modern cakes (let alone old-style wedding cakes), but Edelgard thought it was perfect.

….who smashes cake into whose face:

Neither! They both feed each other carefully.

Who proposed to who first:

Edelgard proposed. She was the one to confess first, and also it made sense that she would be the one to breach the subject first because she’s the emperor and has her responsibilities to worry about.

Who walks down the aisle and who waits at the altar ( or neither ):

Edelgard is brought out first and then waits at the altar for Mira to be brought out.

What their wedding dresses / suits / other look like:

Edelgard’s is red with tones of gold, in the grand imperial tradition. Mira’s is white. Both are quite fluffy and elegant. Mira in particular wanted one with a fuller skirt because she likes the way that looks.

What their wedding colour scheme is and what sort of decor they have:

Lots of red and gold, because imperial colors. There are some touches of white, though, so the color scheme doesn’t get completely overwhelming.

What flowers are in the bouquet ( if applicable. bonus: what do the flowers mean? ):

Everyone who has heard me talk about this ship knows what’s coming, but: red carnations and red roses. The red carnations for Edelgard, and the red roses for Mira. Maybe include some delicate white blossoms in there too.

By the way, the flower symbolism for Edelgard and Mira’s flowers:

Red carnation: deep romantic love, passion

Red rose: true love

What their vows are ( eg poetry, traditional, improvised etc. ):

They’re traditional royal vows, but modified to be more suitable to them. They both looked them over and rewrote them until they were perfect.

If anyone’s late to the wedding:

Not either of them! Caspar and Linhardt probably were, though.

Who’s in the bridal parties / groomsmen / other:

All of the Black Eagles (including friend self inserts) were in the wedding party in some form, as well as some non-Eagles with ties to the empire (Mercedes and Jeritza, Constance, etc.) and Lysithea (who was requested by both Edelgard and Mira). Edelgard’s best man was Hubert, and Mira’s maid of honor was Ingrid (one of the few non-Empire residents). Incidentally, their closest wedding party members weren’t specifically gendered, it just so happened that they ended up with one man and one woman.

What their bridal party / groomsmen / other are wearing:

For the most part they’re dressed in Imperial official wear, with some notable exceptions. Petra comes in her regalia from Brigid (as she is a literal queen in attendance), and Ingrid and Lysithea are dressed in official wear from their respective areas of Fodlan - though the countries themselves are no longer sovereign, it’s a symbolic gesture.

Who gives speeches at the reception ( bonus: what do they say? recount a sweet memory or two between them? tell an embarrassing story? ):

Hubert gives a surprisingly eloquent and well-presented speech dedicated to the couple. Likewise, Ingrid’s is also really good and was particularly heartfelt. Edelgard as emperor also gives a speech, though it’s mostly dedicated to her new wife’s coronation.

Who catches the bouquet( s ):

Ingrid! She gets ribbed a bit by the other former Lions in attendance.

What their wedding photos are like ( are they sweet, with the couple holding hands or kissing or ~gazing into each others eyes~? are they silly, with a snapshot of the ‘cake-smash’ moment? or are they artistic, with one of them facing the sunset or holding their bouquets? ):

Not really wedding “photos”, all things considered, but there is a traditional portrait made of the newlywed couple. It’s fairly traditional in composition, with the two of them seated in their wedding attire both holding a royal scepter, but clearly special attention was paid to their expressions and the love in their eyes. Also, Ignatz was the artist behind the painting! He offered his services as a gift, but they didn’t feel right not paying him, so rest assured that they made it rain on the Ignatz.

What sort of food they have at the reception:

You may be seeing a trend here of traditional but with a twist! It could be described as maybe traditional feast fare, but Mira in particular had strong feelings on the menu and ensured that there would be enough for the many guests and that it would be delicious.

Who cries first during the ceremony:

Mira, if not Caspar.

How wild their reception gets ( who dances the best, who gets drunk first, etc.:

Considering that the whole town is involved, it gets wild! Caspar was probably the biggest party animal, but really almost everyone got to drink and be merry. Also, Hubert agrees to dance just this one time, and he gets cheered on by all of the Eagles.

What their rings are like:

The one Mira received was an imperial heirloom, with the imperial crest on it. Edelgard’s was designed and made to match, with a gold band and red stones.

What sort of favours they have ( heart shaped sparklers, mini champagne bottles, personalised candy etc. ):

No real designated favors, as it were! That wasn’t really commonly done in the Empire’s past, and it would be difficult with the sheer number of guests - it was already hard enough making sure enough food was prepared for everyone!

Where they go for their honeymoon:

If anywhere, to the southern territories of the Empire for some warm weather and sun.

Something memorable that happens during the party / ceremony ( do they run out of ice and someone goes to get it in full formal wear on foot, does anyone fall asleep in the middle of the party, etc. ):

The aforementioned Hubert dance was definitely one! He then insisted that no one ever speak of it again. Caspar will definitely speak of it again.

Who officiates the ceremony:

Ferdinand, as the new Prime Minister. He was pretty proud of his role.

What song their first dance is to:

Can I say someone plays them the Sleeping Beauty Waltz by Tchaikovsky? Because I want to say it’s the Sleeping Beauty Waltz.

Who gives who away as they walk down the aisle:

Edelgard comes out by herself as emperor, then Ingrid and Hubert escort out Mira.

#antiihistamines #this made me very soft thank you #rose and carnation (with edelgard)

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bechloetoxicgirls · 4 years

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Canyon Moon Chapter 1

Fat Amy POV: I walked out of my car with Beca behind me. I had on my sunglasses and I put my hand over my face to block the hot sun from my eyes. “This is it girls,” I said as three more girls rose from the car behind me. Jessica and Ashley rolled out of the trunk groaning. “This is pretty cool, I guess” said Beca half-heartedly. Beca had been really upset upon receiving the invitation to Chloe and Chicago’s wedding and all of us had been named bridesmaids. To everyone’s surprise, Aubrey was the maid of honor and not Beca which only made things more awkward between Chloe and Beca. When they were in college and afterwards too they were roommates. I noticed how close they were so I gave them plenty of room to hang out but once Chloe started dating Chicago, things got tense and Beca started distancing herself from Chloe. Chloe’s invitation came out of the blue in sparkly pink handwriting. I pretended not to notice that night when I heard Beca’s sobs.

“This is a really nice spot 👌 for a wedding,” said Jessica. “Though it is hot as hell!”

“Yeah”, replied Ashley, “but not as hot as Chicago! I can see why Chloe picked him!”

Unfortunately, this was when Beca chose to walk into the conversation. She winced at the mention of Chicago’s name and stared despondently into the distance.

Beca POV

I’ve been dreading this day. Chloe is going to marry a dimwitted airhead because like all straight girls, her taste is absolute garbage. She probably thinks young Joe Biden is hot. I just hope that I can hold it together during the ceremony. Thank God Chloe asked Aubrey to be the maid of honor. I don’t think I could take it, having to give a toast to their happy future when all I really want to toast to is my marriage with her. I’m not even sure if I can stand being a bridesmaid. (I’ll just have to channel my inner Taylor Swift and pretend to be straight.)

I am 5'10 suck it lindsey <becqa is like 5’ 2”>fake news probably from salty lindsey

“Ready to go?” Asked Amy, “we’re grabbing lunch with Chloe and the rest of the gurlz at Chipotle”

I snapped out of my reverie to reply, “sure, yeah, sounds good,” but my mind was still filled with thoughts of chloe.

Chloe POV

I take a deep breath before walking into the restaurant. This is the first time all the girlz are together in 3 years and I don’t know what to expect. Mostly, I was worried about Beca. She’s grown more and more distant over the past few years, despite my constant texts and invitations to meet up. After I announced my engagement, she stopped replying at all, so I had to choose Aubrey as my maid of honor, which has gone exactly the way I expected. COMPLETE bridezilla.

Someone clears their throat behind my and I jump, realizing I’m blocking the door. I skitter like a rat out of the way, apologizing, but the person doesn’t move. I finally look up and see Beca staring at me.

“Hey” Beca mutters and pushes past me.

“Hewwo?” I call after her, confused. Is she mad at me?

Before I can run after her, Aubrey appears next to me so suddenly I feel sure that she has teleported and it makes me jump.

“Why aren’t you getting ready for the rehearsal dinner?” She asks me forcefully. “I specifically told you half an hour ago to go to your room and change because the dinner will be starting at any moment but you’ve just been standing here lingering by the door.” I wasn’t processing what she was saying because my thoughts were elsewhere but I made out that I was supposed to go to my room.

I went to my hotel room across the street with my head filled with the way Beca had just brushed past me like I didn’t even matter. When I got back to my room, I laid down on my bed and cried until my head hurt and I was exhausted. I let my eyes close and allowed myself to forget about Beca in my dreams. Or so I thought.

It’s the day of the wedding. I look in the mirror and sigh. Yes, I look stunning and my hot bod fits perfectly in my dress, but it’s for the wrong person. Chicago is great, but I just don’t feel passionate about him. All our conversations feel like small talk.

“Ready?! You have to hurry, the wedding is starting!” Aubrey screeched. I rubbed my ears(which are quickly losing their use to her obnoxious voice) and got up. I resisted a last look in the mirror-I didn’t need to see my miserable expression again-and headed out of the room.

As I walked to the hall(what’s the main part of a church called? I know i’m a fake christian), I tried to amp myself up. This wouldn’t be so bad. I need to get over Beca anyways, she’s happy with tort boi, sad as that makes me. Chicago is loving and kind and he loves me, and as for me, well, I’ll just fake it till I make it. I walked down the aisle oblivious to my surroundings, but when I looked up at my groom, Beca was there, looking gorgeous in a tailored dress. She always did have good taste.

“Why are you here? Where’s Chicago?” I asked, stunned into oblivion.

“Why would you need him? You know I’m all you need. We are aca-perfect,” she replied, her voice soothing. Too soothing. And since when was Beca so forthright and mystical? I opened my mouth to jumble together a response, but all that came out was

“Chloe! You are drooling all over my bed! Nap on your side, puh-leAse!”

Ugh. So it was a dream. Aubrey was still deafening though. I guess that’s the very essence of her soul.

“Anyways, you can’t be napping, you’re the woman of the hour! Tonight is the rehearsal wedding, and everything has to be perfect!” she snapped again, her pinched mouth reminiscent of a snapping turtle. Huh. Maybe she and Theoi should get together.

That line of thinking wasn’t going to get me anywhere, so, with a Herculean effort, I got out of bed, grimaced at the drooled-on pillow, and went to get ready.

Chicago POV

I can’t believe I’ve let it get this far. I mean who knew that when I saw a pretty girl touring with her failing a capella group, it would last this long? And now I don’t know how to get out. But I have to.

I threw off the sheets and rolled out of bed, shivering because Chloe had turned up the AC so high, but she didn’t even stay the night. Our hotel had lots of pictures (over 12) of the Grand Canyon, despite being an almost hour drive away. I tried to picture us saying our vows with the beautiful red rocks in the pictures behind us, but it just didn’t sit right. I knew I had to do something.

I took a quick piss outside (I don’t believe in modern plumbing), and decided to call Chloe.

She picked up the second time I called her, sounding half asleep even though it was already eleven.

“What?” She asked urgently, as though something was wrong.

“Uh, nothing, i was just wondering where you were since you didn’t come back last night.”

“Oh! I just, uh, decided to spend some time with the old gal pals. You know, catch up on life and stuff. You wouldn’t understand.”

“Um… okay,” I said, even though I did understand, because she was just talking to her friends, “are you coming back soon? I kind of want to talk.”

“Yeah sure,” she responded, but seemed distracted by something (or someone) else, because she abruptly said, “catch you later,” and hung up.

I knew we had to talk about our future, because even though she was excited about the friends, and the food, and the planning, I felt, I knew, she was just a little bit less excited about me. This marriage was not going to end in divorce 6 months later if I could help it, so my options are call it off right now, or fake it till we make it. And I think the second option was going to be a little bit harder, so I decided the stronger one of us would have to do something (and I am stronger because I am in the army).

Beca POV

I can’t stop thinking about that moment with Chloe. Seeing her after so long, it all came back to me, no matter how much I’d tried to repress it. Her constant peppy texting had caused me a mental breakdown every time I got a notification. It got to be too much and I had to give her a random number from a burner phone to text instead, like I did with Theo. When I saw her at the restaurant I just froze and couldn’t speak. Also she yelled hewwo and I didnt like that.

Now I’m trying to get ready for the rehearsal dinner, but this dress is uuuuugly. I’m pretty sure Aubrey picked it out because she hates me more than usual recently. The dress is also really tight, too tight to breathe. I give up on making it look nice and cut it crudely down the front with scissors. Hopefully no one will notice. I see that I’m late for the dinner and run out of my room, straight into Theo, the turtle man.

“W.T.F.?!?! What are you doing here?” I demand, angry that he’s slowing me down.

“Woah, heh heh, why are you so worked up?”

I practice my Miss Congeniality self defense - Solar Plexus, Instep, Nose, Groin - and step over him curled up on the floor like a grub.

As I run away from his body on the ground, I turn a corner and run straight into a hotel attendant in the hallway. She staggers a little and almosts trips but I catch her by grabbing her arm to steady her. “Oh I’m so sorry!” I say and she smiles at me.

“That’s okay,” she says and I smile back. She frowns and says “are you okay?” I turn serious and say “ummm… yeah.. Why?”

“It’s just that your smile looks more like a grimace and your dress is all cut up,” and I flinch at because she was right and I wasn’t doing okay. “Do you have a minute? I ask and when she nods, I unload everything I had been feeling lately and about how I really felt about Chloe and how I really felt about this wedding.

“I am so sorry for you,” she said, placing her hand on my arm and rubbing it. “Do you need anything?”

“Actually, yeah,” I say hesitantly to her because I was worried my new friend would be scared off at my request. “Do you think you could walk me to my dinner?”

She smiles and says, “Of course,” Taking my hand, she says “I’m Sophia, by the way.”

“Beca” I say and we walk hand in hand down the hallway of the hotel.

Chloe POV

yeetmsaaaaaAAAaaa chaotic writer, i am, the universe’s power, i Have aaayyyyeeee

I’m at the rehearsal dinner, some snooty restaurant that Aubrey picked. You’d think she’s the one getting married, with the amount of planning she’s put into this. Annoying as she is, I cannot deny that she is dedicated to making my ‘best’ day perfect. Sadly, she can’t change the fact that the person I’m marrying is in no way perfect for me.

Don’t think like that, I reminded myself. You need to fake it till you make it.

“Chloe?” called Chicago, “Can we talk?”

“Yeah, sure-,” I replied halfheartedly, since Beca had just walked in with another girl. They were holding hands and looked friendly. Too friendly. Wasn’t she with Theo? Too many emotions flooded into my mind-sphere and I recoiled from the shock. Had they broken up? I repressed the joy I felt from that thought. It probably wasn’t true, and besides, she was with someone else anyways. But I always thought she was straight… No she was probably just friends with this girl, you know how normal american girlz act… But if she was with this girl, was she cheating on Theo? Should I let him know or let the relationship fall apart on its own? Was this a short fling? Would-

“Chloe! You all right?” asked Chicago, concerned. I shook my head, muttered a “yeah, fine” and followed him off to one of the changing rooms.

“Sorry about this, I wanted to talk somewhere… private,” he explained in a low tone.

Private? What was that supposed to mean? He wasn’t trying to…

“There’s no easy way to put this. But I… this isn’t working. And I’m sorry I’ve let our relationship get this far, but… It was so easy to get carried away. I just don’t feel passion for you,” Chicago said, his face a perfect picture of apology and shame.

Oh thank god, he wanted to break up. I let out a short laugh, which might have not been the best thing to do.

“Sorry,” I quickly replied, “It’s just… I’m relieved. I’ve been feeling the same way. It’s been a while since I’ve felt more than friendliness towards you. At least we didn’t get married yet!”

“Well what’re we gonna do? Call off the wedding obviously, but we’ve prepped so much!”

I opened my mouth to speak, but before I could get more than an “I aca-completely agree wi-” when Aubrey burst through the door. Jesus Mary and Joseph, she really couldn’t have had worse timing!

“Aca-excuse me?! What is going on here?! Do you seriously want to call off my perfectly planned wedding!!!” she shrieked, surely letting the whole wedding party hear our issues.

“Ahhhh!” I screamed at her. “Aubrey! I don’t have time for you to make this all about you! Just because you will never find someone who loves you doesn’t mean that you get to make this all about you!” Her face looked shocked and I stormed out of the restaurant.

I looked out in the horizon and saw the stunning view of the Grand Canyon beneath me. I had always wanted to see the Grand Canyon and had wanted all of my wedding pictures to have the stunning view in the background because I love nature and it was extraordinary that the Earth made this over thousands of years. Amazing. I wanted to get a closer look so I began to walk towards the canyon.

Soon, I heard footsteps following me and I turned to see Beca chasing after me. My stomach fluttered. She ran until she was about 6 feet away from me and we looked in each others’ eyes for what felt like five minutes. I was waiting for her to tell me she loves me but I knew she never would because she loved Theo or that girl she was holding hands with or something. Instead I said “Do you want to walk with me?” She nodded silently and we walked towards the canyon together.

When we finally reached it we stood at the edge overlooking it, staring at it in silence and then she turned to me and leaned in to kiss me. I was so scared that I staggered back and before I knew it I was falling, hitting tree after tree and rock after rock. The last thing I saw before I blacked out was Beca screaming “CHLOE!” and jumping in after me.

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#bechloe #sendrick #anna kendrick #beca mitchell #chloe beale #brittany snow #pitch perfect #pitch perfect 2 #pitch perfect 3 #fan fic #fanfiction #fanfic #fan fiction #toxic #canyon moon #harry styles

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Taurus at the Speed of Sound ~ May Monthly Horoscope

by Eric Francis

Dear Friend and Reader:

Earlier this week, we experienced the first of seven Sun-Uranus conjunctions in Taurus (that was Monday, April 22). News events are moving at a dizzying pace, and defy comprehension. At the time I’m writing this article on April 25, it’s been just over a week since the Notre Dame Cathedral fire, and a week since the release of the redacted version of the Special Counsel’s report. It seems more like a month.

As of this writing, there are now 20 Democratic presidential candidates, with Joe Biden’s entry into the race. Also today, Russia’s president Vladimir Putin met Kim Jong-un, the Korean leader, for a summit meeting in China. Putin is moving in on a power vacuum abandoned by Trump’s failed attempts at courting diplomacy with Kim.

Texas executed John William King for the 1998 killing of James Byrd, the first time in modern Texas history that a Caucasian man was executed for the death of an African American man. This was the infamous dragging death by a white supremacist.

Pres. Trump denied that he ordered then-White House Counsel Dan McGahn to fire Special Counsel Robert Mueller III. He said that McGahn had lied to the Special Counsel about this during the investigation.

McGahn, one of the star witnesses in the Special counsel’s investigation, has been subpoenaed to testify before Congress, but Trump brought a personal lawsuit to block his testimony. The president also vowed to fight any subpoena of documents or testimony by congressional oversight committees, in effect daring the House of Representatives to impeach him.

On that note, if he is impeached, Trump said he would fight it at the U.S. Supreme Court. He is clearly referencing his impression that he would get a 5-4 win on any case he brings, but there is no such course of action provided for under the Constitution. (What actually happens during an impeachment is that the chief justice presides over the trial, with the Senate serving as the jury.)

Contents of the report of the Special Counsel, 448 pages long, are gradually percolating through the news. The report details the astonishing extent of Russian meddling in the election, which came in the form of a social media propaganda campaign dating to 2014, and hack and dump operations of email and confidential documents stolen from formal Democratic Party offices and Hillary Clinton’s personal office.

Jared Kushner, the president’s son-in-law, this week falsely summed up the operation Wednesday as consisting of “a couple of Facebook ads.”

On the Personal Side of the Equation

We live in a restless time. I keep reading articles about the impact of lack of sleep and sleep hygiene. Part of this impact is coming from being inundated by radio waves, which are invisible light waves; these burn melatonin. So too does exposure to blue light, which is a fact of looking into screens all day.

But there is something more, a sense of agitation, nervousness and fear, as if we’re heading toward an edge that we cannot see.

Despite all the discussion about global warming and climate change, collectively our societies are doing very little about it. Economic success is still measured in growth — corporate profits and the value of the stock market. Many people are struggling — really struggling — to make ends meet as everything gets more and more expensive.

Economic woes are always an issue; we hear about them in good times and bad. But we are living in the New Gilded Age, when there are more billionaires than ever before. Money is energy, and much of it is stagnant at the moment, as companies and individuals hang onto huge cash reserves. There is fear of loss and little imagination about what to do with vast sums of wealth that exist.

As I’ve written many times, my studied impression is that the internet is what is driving consciousness: the sensation of what it feels like to be alive right now. Inundation by internet is the primary factor behind the social crisis, the anxiety epidemic, the sexless relationships, and a general state of psychic chaos.

Reader Responses: Uranus in Taurus

I recently asked my readers how they were responding to Uranus in Taurus. Here is a sample of the responses:

“It’s quite an upheaval. My trust in God has increased and at times is still quite tested. Due to a lingering concussion that hasn’t healed I haven’t worked for several weeks. I am far out on a limb in completely new territory. I have a sense that I am learning many things that I’ve needed to learn for a while. I am also in brand new territory that’s missing some of the old markers.”

lived at ages 4-6, (big stir), all the moving from home to home before I was in 5th grade… my inner sense of personal sovereignty and authority has had its challenges as I feel that speaking in honesty and truth can fucking stir lots of pots. It seems to put people I care for in uncomfortable wonder about my authenticity in relationship to them, cause I’m challenging them.”

“Quite a lot has shifted for me but the one that really stands out is as a 57 year old man who is pretty conservative in physical expression and exercise, I started going to a weekly free form dance and have progressed from slow soulful movement to full on dance machine!”

“Everything about personal awakening resonates, though that started about 3 years ago. Building on that theme now, Uranus seems to be about burning through convention to see what remains, like the alchemical calcination phase, and using what’s left to (re)build something new. This is showing up in my career, which is being guided towards creating a new, spiritually-based business model from what survives the fire.”

“On the 15th my shelf of greenware fell over and every piece broke. My shelf of essential oils came out of the wall; luckily only one bottle broke. I found myself reading about broken vessels, specifically oil bottles and the shards with drops of oil representing light and the connection to everything. But the break through this week, and I think that is what Uranus in Taurus is offering, is that these material things do not matter except for what they represent. Throwing pots is a meditation for me. It is the process that is important, not the creation of the material, but the creation of the spiritual body. Part of my path, it seems, is renunciation or detachment to the material plane. Creation of the spiritual body is most important. I also learned that you cannot have a loving connection to others without a loving connection with God/creator.”

Beltane New Moon Coming May 4

The Beltane New Moon on May 4 is an intriguing chart. I’ll have more to say about it in Monday morning’s edition, and in the upcoming Planet Waves FM (where I will continue my coverage of the Special Counsel’s report, and ignoring the presidential race). The horoscope below is based on the Beltane chart — shown in the graphic below.

With love, Eriv

~~~~~~~~~

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