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oftenderweapons · 3 years

Note

hello 👀 first of all i love your writing. second of all idk if you saw joon’s make up artist reaching up to him to fix his makeup on set but i could think about vixen bc we all know how volatile and jealous she may get.... so may i suggest a joon x vixen jealous sex drabble??? thank u!!!

Hello, dear reader. Thank you soooo much for the compliments. I couldn’t help but deliver, it literally wrote itself. There you go 💜✨

title: yours, truly

pairing: namjoon x reader (nicknamed Vixen)

wordcount: 2.7k

genre: smut, fluff, established relationship

rating: 18+, minors do not interact

synopsis: Vixen doesn't appreciate the imbalance between her belonging to Namjoon and his belonging to her, and although she understands the limits due to his job, at the same time she's uncomfortable about the way she feels. However, Namjoon is eager to reassure her.

trigger warnings: argument on jealousy and double standards. There is one very specific passage where Namjoon imposes himself physically on Vixen, grabbing her and pinning her while she's trying to get away from him. If this triggers you, please do not read further. On to sexual topics: mention of cunnilingus, masturbation (male and female receiving), unprotected sex (BE SMART!!!!!!), marking, power struggle, several occurrences of pinning and top-bottom shifts.

a/n: Hello people, here's the first of several drabbles I've been working on. Please, stay tuned cause HOPEFULLY Jimin and Princess should be next 💖

Here's my masterlist enjoy 💜✨

⁂ ⁕ ⁂ ⁕ ⁂ ⁕ ⁂ ⁕ ⁂ ⁕ ⁂ ⁕ ⁂

You stormed into the apartment, Namjoon hot on your heels.

“Vixen,” he called, watching you take off your shoes with a frown on your face. “Babylove.”

You lifted a finger, inviting him to keep quiet before you stood and headed to your room.

“Vixen?” he called, once more. He knew what had happened, and he knew you didn't mean to act like that. He knew you didn't like feeling jealous or possessive, but the footage of him wrapping an arm around his makeup artist — even if it was just to keep her from falling — had unsettled you more than you wanted to admit.

There were women who dried his sweat and helped him change his clothes and saw him half naked regularly, and they were out there doing so publicly, while you didn't even own a picture of him kissing you. After being together for six months. After him asking you to be his wife.

To anyone except his friends and family, you were nothing but a stranger to him.

“Vixen?”

You were his. Always. All the time. You wore his clothes and had his marks on you from Monday to Sunday, twenty-four seven, uninterruptedly ever since he'd first told you he loves you — with an unintended pause because of the tour.

But what about him? Did he even belong to you?

He called your name shyly, fearsomely. “Look at me, please.”

“I'm going to take a bath,” you announced dryly.

“I'm coming with you,” he replied, already taking off his clothes.

“I want to be alone.”

He inhaled and did the crudest, most animalistic thing he could think of. He grabbed your waist and made you face him. “Vixen. Look at me.”

You shook your head and tutted.

“Say 'no' and I'll let you go,” he said, his voice booming like thunder.

You stayed silent.

“Look at me,” he repeated, an arm around your waist, his free one coming up so he could grip your chin and force your eyes to meet his. “Like this.”

“I hate this!” you spat, looking away right before he forced you to meet his eyes again. “It's not fair!” You snarled before angrily pushing the heel of your foot against his toes.

He hissed and let you go, only to catch you once more half a second later, pinning you against the wall. “Talk to me.”

Your brow furrowed, your eyes like a dark storm, you looked at the floor as you admitted, “I have no right to feel jealous. And I hate it. It’s not fair.”

Namjoon hugged you to him, kissing your head as you pressed your forehead to his chest.

“I’m so sorry, I just… hate that you make me feel like this. It’s not you, it’s how I feel about what you do. That is, the position you’re in.” You bit your lip nervously, gripping his shirt in your fists.

Namjoon didn’t quite understand what you meant by that, but reversing the situation gave him a quite poignant point of view. The idea of you being chaperoned by other men at all time, of you being in his shoes, with people drooling over you at all times, being backstage and having no privacy with or without your clothes on, people imagining you as their partner, as their hot one night stand, as their one true love.

The thought of having to share you the same way you had to share him all the time made a shiver run down his spine. He knew he would never be able to tolerate all the things you went through for him without batting an eye. “I’m so sorry, love.” He ran his hands to the back of your thighs lowering himself to pick you up, your arms latching behind his neck as he did so. “I’m so, so sorry, little fox,” he repeated, his voice so deep and soothing.

“I’m okay, it’s just that…”

He kissed your cheek as he sat on the bed, placing you on top of him, straddling his hips. “You’re not okay, and that’s alright.” He waited for you to oppose as he let his lips linger one millimeter from yours.

Shyly, almost as if reluctantly, you pressed your mouth to his, feeling his hand on your nape, tangling in your hair, the other one pressed to the small of your back. “Take off your clothes, please,” you whispered in between kisses. Unquestioningly, he took off his undershirt, your body still on top of his while you undid the buttons of your blouse — actually, only a couple of them before you slipped it off from over your head. Namjoon’s hands went around your waist, lifting the lace and satin top you were wearing underneath, pressing his nose to your sternum once your torso was so enticingly naked, your body rising to your knees so he could reach your breastbone more comfortably, your arms hugging his head.

“You’re so precious, my babylove. So strong,” he murmured, “You’re so understanding and I’m so glad when you open up to me.” He inhaled you as he confessed some more of his worries, “I always fear that someday it will feel too much and you’ll leave.”

You shook your head, squishing his face in your palms before standing before him, taking off your jeans lightning-fast, watching him quickly remove his slacks and underwear in one go.

“Come claim it, babe,” he growled, extending his hands to you, making a come-hither motion.

You wiggled out of your panties and smiled sweetly, joining him, sitting on his lap and batting your eyelashes with a cute pout, Namjoon shaking his head at you with a knowing grin. And at that, you placed your hands on his shoulders and pushed him down. “You really thought?”

He licked his lips and rolled his eyes. “I, at least, hoped.” His hands landed on your ass before you could grab his wrists and pin them above his head while you made your way up, your naked fold glistening with wetness already in the unforgivingly bright light of your bedroom.

You knew he had a thing for keeping the lights on anyways.

“Come on, sit,” he said, his arms fighting you only playfully as he ached to grab your ass and make you ride his face.

“No.” Your reply was lapidary as your free hand began to tease the skin around your sex — not yet your folds, nor your clit,

“Vixen.” Your name sounded like a warning.

“Maybe you’ll learn I can do without you.”

“Enough,” he growled before his arms escaped your weak excuse of a grip, his jaw locked and his eyes stern in what would be nothing but his hard dom look. “You think you’re funny?”

The way he pushed you with your back to the mattress, your arms trying to save you from losing your balance, made your heartbeat flutter.

“You think I don’t know that already? You think that doesn’t scare me to the bone?” He hissed as he laid on top of you, holding back his weight only slightly. “We know who can do without who here,” he said, his eyes so tormented you wanted to comfort him. “I’m half a soul without you.”

You wrapped your legs around him, rubbing your pelvis against his hardening cock. “Stay with me, then. Remind me.” You placed your lips against his neck, licking up the curve of his throat before bringing your lips to his ear. “Are you mine, Joonie?”

His eyes rolled shut, his head moving in a nodding motion. “I only want to be yours. All the time. I wish we could be naked and alone every single second.”

You giggled and moved your hand between your bodies. “Can I stretch a little? I need you inside.”

“Do you want me to do that?” He asked, right before you shook your head. “Fuck, ____, you're fucking perfect,” he murmured, kissing down your body, licking your nipple, sucking it briefly. “I'm so in love.”

“Do you remember what I told you that night?” you asked him, purring as you pushed two fingers inside you.

“That you're gonna be my wife, someday?”

You chuckled and nodded. Sometimes it felt unreal that he had proposed to you. Already.

And that the ring around your right fourth finger was not your family ring.

“I told you I'm dedicating my life to you. That I want to live by your side for as long as we can. That I believe in you.”

He found solace in the crook of your neck, his lips searching for your collarbone before his teeth nibbled at it gently. “Don't stop. Ever.”

A third finger entered your hole, stretching your inner walls until you were comfortable. Still, you were too impatient to wait any longer, grabbing his cock and placing its tip against your folds. “I won't,” you promised, a loud gasp leaving your mouth as he sank in. “Fuck, too big.”

Namjoon backtracked as quickly as possible, but your hands stopped him just in time. “No, no, stay inside, please. I can get used to it.” Your nails sunk into his ass. “Don't go. Please.”

Namjoon inhaled, trying to keep his cool as much as possible. “I should have prepped you.” He groaned and pressed your face into his neck. “Hold tight, love. I need to shift just a little.”

You loved when he pampered you like that, when he treated you like his delicate porcelain doll. With a loud exhale, he fixed his position until he could rest more easily and resist your tight squeezes as you adjusted to him filling you to the brim. In maybe a minute, you shifted your hips, whispering, “Okay, move, please.”

“That's my good girl,” he replied, smiling at you before giving one slow, smooth stroke that made you purr and throw your head back, his tongue drawing the arch of your throat. “My jealous little thing, mh? You're so adorable.” He gave another deep, slow thrust, watching you writhe below him, legs shaking as they tensed up in pleasure. And then again, pulling out and pushing in making your toes curl, your entire mind malfunctioning into bliss.

“I love it when you're jealous,” he taunted you. “Makes me feel so wanted.” He drew the shell of your ear with his lips, your body drowning in sensations, too small to handle all he had to offer. “Almost as sexy and as desirable as you are. My little fox.”

“Joonie…” you almost sobbed, clawing at his shoulders before remembering you must absolutely not, throwing your hands off him and tugging at the sheets.

Namjoon nuzzled his nose against the side of your face. “Scratch, mark, bite. I don't care. I'm yours, Vixen.”

You whimpered and forced yourself not to. Maybe you just wanted to see who would cave first, maybe you were still feeling too petty about all the times you had been denied.

“Do it. I know you want it,” he tempted you. “Take what you want, little fox.”

You shook your head and brought yourself not only to pin your hands in place, but also turn your face away.

Namjoon rammed into you aggressively at your act of defiance, causing you to gasp and flinch. “Claim me. Do it, ____. I belong to you. Won't you acknowledge that?”

Lips sealed, eyes closed, you fought him, knowing you were absolutely hopeless the moment he pulled you on top of him. “See. This is what you do to me. Look at me. Look at the mess I become for you. For you, alone. No one else in the whole world, Vixen. Only you.” He led his hand on your belly, rubbing at your clit with his thumb, letting you grind on him with your own pace. He only wanted to make you feel good. “Vixen, please, baby. Look at me.

Slowly, you opened your eyes, your hands on his pectorals, your hips moving on him so naturally, so comfortably. He looked beautiful. Grandiose. Magnificent.

He looked like the only man you would ever look at. You knew there was no way you would look at anyone else if he was in the room.

“What are you thinking about?” He asked fondly, placing his hand atop of yours, lacing your fingers together.

“That you're the only one for me. That I need something of you that belongs to me alone.”

He shifted your hands slightly, his engulfing your own on top of his beating heart. “Here. Yours. All yours. Take it.”

You started going faster, needing for the messy ordeal to come to an end so you could sleep the afternoon away wrapped up in his arms.

With quick swivels of your hips, you changed your angle, making sure that he rubbed against your sweet spot, deep inside you.

“Guess what else is yours?” he teased, looking down, keeping his finger steady against your sensitive nub.

“Your exceedingly large dick?” you suggested with a gleam in your voice, sending the both of you into a tumble of laughs.

“Exactly,” he replied playfully. “I love you.”

“Love you too,” you replied quickly, feeling your high spiral out of control. “Cumming.”

“Let go,” he reassured you, catching you with his arm once your body collapsed, his thumb still teasing you while he started thrusting from below, making sure that your orgasm peaked and extinguished in pleasure before he finally climaxed, knowing all too well that your final squeezes would trigger his own ecstasy.

“Doesn't it feel good to cum on your favourite dick, mh?”

“My one and only,” you stated openly, watching him get increasingly worked up. “Show me who you belong to, Joon. You say you're mine? Then cum inside me.”

He shut his eyes tight. “Come on. Gimme all you've got,” you taunted him.

He grit his teeth and shook his head. He needed better leverage to go harder.

You understood that immediately. “Wanna get on top?”

He was conflicted, but in the end you found yourself with your back once more to the mattress, his cock pushing inside you so hard and fast that you were ready to start all over again if it weren't for the numbing sleepiness pulling at your mind.

“I'm yours,” he gritted out, in between strokes, like a mantra. “Get it into your pretty head that I'm yours. That I only want you. For the rest of my life,” he breathed out the final part. “I'm gonna—” and with a wildly erotic growl you felt him swell inside you before his release flowed into you, his body too sensitive to handle the high for too long.

Once he was done, there was nothing but spent, panting bodies, your hand in his hair as you helped him calm down.

“Are you feeling better, little fox?” he asked, taking your joined hands and bringing your knuckles to his lips. “If we swapped roles for a day, you the idol and I the normal person, I don't think I would be able to face it like you do.”

With your eyes closed, you waited for him to pull the two of you on your sides, your head on his chest, legs tangled together as he rubbed his feet against yours lazily and lasciviously.

“I know you don't like feeling jealous and I'm sorry that I made you feel that. You always say it's part of my job and you're understanding, but we both know it's hard to stop these emotions from happening.”

You nodded, inhaling his scent, so deeply mixed with yours. “It's worth it though. Because of the man you are, and what you mean to me.”

He kissed your head.

“I need to clean up. I want to sleep with you.”

He nodded. You were both more than happy to cancel the date and just sleep in, wrapped up in light sheets on the late September day.

Once washed and ready for sleep, Namjoon found your perfect position, your right hand in his left one as he toyed with your ring, pushing it around. Even though he had proposed, he knew the wait would be long. Still, he tried. “How much time left?” he asked, the question a cliché between the two of you by now. You always knew what it meant to him.

“A while,” you replied — your usual answer.

He nodded and pulled you closer. “Sleep tight, baby fox.”

“Sleep tight, big bear.”

#namjoon smut #namjoon fluff #namjoon x reader #namjoon drabble #kim namjoon fanfiction #namjoon x yn #namjoon x vixen #thebtswritersclub #houseofddaeng #thetruthuntoldnet #52hertz #bangtansorciere

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noritoshiikamo · 3 years

Text

game over

pairing: noritoshi kamo + fem!oc genre: angst tags//warning: established relationship, wild gojo appeared // blood, character death, emotion distress, mention of shibuya note: the obligatory trio of mine: not well edited, lowercase intended, english isnt my first language im sorry if i murder it. note that i put descriptions of the characters i write so it would be easier for me, you’re free to imagine the character the way you seem fits! okay listen imma be honest i dont like this part that much dhhdbdjksncjddiem and im sorry if it sucks bcs istg i cant compete to part 1 and 2 of it so IM SORRY tagging @unabashednightmarepizza @sassyeahhhh @dok-ja @sukirichi [bold means i cant tag u idky :( lemme know if wanna be tagged in the next part] read the first part | second part | third part | bonus

few years ago;

“you’re fucking ridiculous!”

“you’re injured, how the fuck is it me that’s being unreasonable?”

she contemplated stabbing him straight to his chest. “i’m fine, leave me alone,” she hissed, holding on to her arm as she tried to limp away. second year jujutsu student noritoshi kamo wondered how the hell one could be this stubborn. with blood caked up on the side of her face, lips busted and bruising in the corner, not to mention the broken arm and probably twisted ankle, he could not understand how one could be this reckless and stupid, it’s almost ridiculous.

but here she is standing in front of him.

“you could’ve let me handle it,” he said, coldly.

she never turned that fast in her life; her limping leg suddenly worked fine as she hauled her ass, throwing both fists to his chest. the force put was enough to threw him back a few steps, he caught her wrists holding her from falling down. “stop acting like i’m so fragile. i can exorcist the curse just fine. you make me hate you so much,” she spitted, pure rage etched on her face, “just because i’m a girl, because i’m your girl, i’m weak. please, i am as good as you are, kamo.”

their faces were so close, he could count the freckles spread on her nose and cheeks. he loves her eyes the very first time he caught glimpse of it; one is a dull brown while the other looks like it carries the secret of the bright blue sea. this time, the eyes he loves looked hopeless, lack of the burning spirit she carried with tears threatening to spill. letting go of a wrist, his trembling hand brushed the hair coated with the blood back, carefully not to hurt her. “i never said you are bad,” he clarified, fingers busy brushing the hair back. his sudden reaction surprised her, and her body betrayed her thoughts as she eased in his arms.

he tilted her chin, his head was panicking as he realised that his brain was no longer controlling his movement as he leaned down and kissed her.

she tasted like blood.

she winced, pain aching on the swollen part and he apologized so quietly as he deepened the kiss. “nori-” her voice croaked as she swallowed his moans. he hummed, satisfied by the kiss. their foreheads rest against each other, the tip of their noses touched as they struggled to catch breath.

“stop being stupid. let me help you okay?”

“okay.”

slipping his arm under hers, he helped her walk, leading them out of the abandoned building they managed to exorcist. nothing major, a couple of pestering level three and four curses that them both handled well but their supervisor missed to tell them about the hiding level two curse that took them by surprise. she had become the curse’s main target.

if she would’ve just listened to him and stay close. he sighed.

“ouch, ouch,” she cried, clutching on her left leg, forcing him to stop. impatient, he slipped his hand under her knees, lifting her up in his arms. she apologized profusely, embarrassed to be such a burden to him. he brushed it off immediately.

“did you call them? told them that we are done?”

she gasped, “wait, i thought they’ll wait for us.”

he huffed, “you’re not that important, y/n. give them a call, please. i want to go home.”

kicking the door open, the moonlight shone on them as he carried her down to the bottom stairs. settling her down on the steps, he sat beside her, letting a long sigh. he watched as she took the call, letting them know that she was slightly injured, and they need to go back asap. she was visibly tired, and he was the same too.

he couldn’t help but to sigh at the way the moonlight enveloped her. he had loved her from the very first moment he caught his eyes on her; she caught him staring, called him out publicly and ignored all his advances. it took him a lot to court her. she’s a gojo, she can have anything and everything with the sky is the limit.

but one thing money could never buy is affection.

it started with little stuffs; noritoshi waiting for her with her lunch readied every day. it annoyed her but momo (who was secretly rooting for him) forced her to just do it. “it’s just a lunch,” momo said sheepishly. noritoshi would have them paired all the time for the missions. she’d accepted it with open heart. noritoshi would also teach her how to weld a bow and shoot arrows. she promised that she would go out on date with him if he taught her.

by the end of their first year, they became inseparable.

the idea of being apart from her hurts him physically and mentally. she took a sharp breath when he laced his fingers between her own, quickly telling the other person on the phone that she was okay. “it was just noritoshi,” she replied with a small laugh. their hands fit each other; his skin contrasted her slightly tanned skin. while his hands were rough from welding the bow and he kept his nail short and clean, hers were slightly softer with her nails painted prettily. this month she had her nails painted in pastel. all the girls’ day out with momo and mai had proven its importance. he was happy to provide her with his black card despite her discontent.

“analysing my hands now?”

he smiled slightly, “it looks very pretty. i guess i got my money worth. are they coming?”

she leaned on his shoulder, his own wrapped around her as she closed her eyes, “they are around the corner. i would definitely need another round this week,” she teased. kissing her forehead gently, he didn’t mind that his uniform was stained with her blood; he was glad that she’s safe.

“i’ll happily take you there.”

few years later;

noritoshi kamo almost lost his mind. the stadium was half destroyed, huge craters on the pitch with the sight of his wife nowhere to be found. he looked up to the black pitch curtain encasing the stadium area from the sky, a curse escaped his lips.

“where the fuck are you?” he grunted, scanning the area.

she is gone, his stubborn little wife. she could’ve just wait but annoyed that their dinner date was interrupted and eager because this was their first mission together as a married couple; she escaped his supervision. as they were dealing with minor curses outside, she decided to head on forward, leaving him to deal with whatever is left. he beat himself inside for letting her come, he could easily do this himself and send her home safely, but she blinked her eyes and he was weak. she always has her way with him.

his step stopped when he realised there was a shadow ahead.

“she’s pretty,” the thing said.

his blood ran cold, “what did you do to my wife?”

the curse let out a laugh. it was sinister enough to send chills down his spine. especially when he realised the head it was stepping on was his wife. her eyes were fluttering back and forth, struggling to stay awake. a howl shocked him, shivers down his spine at the painful whimpers her shikigami making. cursed spirits were devouring it alive, overwhelming it and chewing every part of its body. his wife was too weak to dispel the shikigami; it’s dangerous as the devoured wolf shikigami will drain her cursed energy by a second.

all shikigami linked directly to the owner; everything inflected to the wolf, she could feel it too.

he needed a plan.

hidden in his wedding ring was a retractable knife. he rarely carries blood bags anymore as his power solidified itself. the older he got, the better he was at using and controlling a small steady flow of his own blood straight from the tap. with a clap of his hands, the knife cut his hand enough to send blood shooting like bullets. the blood hit the curses straight to its cores, died out instantly on impact, but the shikigami was beyond salvageable. it let out one last howl, one last goodbye before dropping to the ground, half of his snout gone. she will be devastated, it’s her only shikigami she managed to tame at such a young age, but at least it has stopped the shikigami from stripping his wife’s cursed energy to its core.

the fire burning in his eyes only made the curse laughed. he kicked her body away, spurting blood out of her mouth. she was halfway close to death’s doorstep.

“i will fucking murder you,” he hissed.

“my blood is my power. it’s supposed to rot human, stripping its meat from the bone like acid. however,” the curse nudged her body, “your wife didn’t. humour me, did your blood tainted hers? tell me, i’m curious how.”

“are you going to chit chat because i don’t have whole day.” his blood dripped on the pitch.

the curse grinned, shrugging his shoulder. he kneeled, running his bloody fingers on her cheeks leaving trails of flowers pattern that dissipated immediately, “i’m not here to fight. i’m here to serve a warning,” he looked up to the tensed sorcerer, “for gojo satoru. tell him, we’ll be waiting for him in shibuya.” noritoshi’s face scrunched in confusion.

“we have no business with the gojos.”

“but she is. she could change her name, married you, but it doesn’t erase the fact that she carried gojo’s blood in her vein. she’s the bridge to your two clans. i’m just killing two birds with one stone. ruin the kamo clan’s relationship with gojos and hurt gojo satoru. all thanks to her,” the curse turned his back on him, his laugh echoed as he walked away. the dark curtain disappeared slowly as the ground rumbled. a perfect chance for noritoshi to strike if it wasn’t because of the cursed spirit’s words gluing him to his spot, “oh, kamo, i believe a congratulation is overdue. let me know when’s the baby is due, i would love to drop by personally.”

the pillar holding on to the roof collapsed sending wave of dust all over the place. noritoshi covered his face, coughing as he sucked some in, removing his coat as a shield. the cursed spirit was no where to be found.

“the place is going to collapse! i’ll get the curse, you go get her!”

a voice echoed and he caught a glimpse of blond hair running past him and noritoshi didn’t think twice as he sprinted around the cracks and holes. who was that voice or who was the curse, he couldn’t give a single fuck, he just wants his wife back. he was shaking when he got to her, arms immediately scooped her up in his arms. her chest was raising slowly, blood dripping on the side of her lips as she struggled to exhale.

“you’re going to be okay,”

he told her, but he wasn’t sure if he will ever be.

“can you turn down the stupid light, it’s hurting my eyes.”

the voice laughed melodiously, the light moved to the other eye repeating the same thing.

“as you can see, she’s awake, slightly weak, but she should be okay.”

another voice interrupted, “are you sure?” she gasped, excited to hear a familiar voice. “nori?” she called out, unable to open her eyes, relying strictly to her hearing as she reached her shaky hands out for him. “her senses might be slightly off, just let her do it herself,” the woman’s voice noted, and she felt annoyed. how dare you underestimate me, her mind scoffed.

“my senses are fine. see?” she claimed as she held noritoshi’s hand up. he smiled, gently rubbing her hand with encouragement. “thanks, shoko, we are fine.”

“i’ll leave you be then. call me if you need anything.”

she listened to the clacking of shoko’s heels, followed by the door opening and slamming shut. she jumped, but he held her hand tighter, reassuring her that it’s alright. “so why can’t i see?” she asked, confident that they are alone now. she felt the bed sunk a little on the left side, “you were high on anesthesia, i’m surprise you could even move your jaw to speak.” she felt a finger brushed her hair aside, breath loomed on her face and she could feel her own face reddening up.

“are you going to kiss me or are you just going to tease me?” his heart swell up, despite her shaky voice almost made him laugh.

“do you trust me?” his hand cupped her cheek gently.

she nodded eagerly, “always.”

“good.”

his kiss hit her like a waft of fresh air. every kiss felt like a first kiss to her that she couldn’t help to react so eagerly to it. his tongue slipped through her defense, overwhelming her taste buds with such strong taste of iron. it didn’t stop her. she knew what he was doing from start. he peeked a little, didn’t stop a second from kissing her as he watched his blood marking appeared on her face. her hands went up around her neck pulling him closer and he obeyed, deepening the kiss.

heal; his mind commanded.

after a while, she pulled back, being the one to break apart from the kiss first, her chest raising up and down as she struggled to catch her breath. her eyes were wide open now, fluttering lazily as she leaned back on the propped-up pillow. he wiped the corner of his lips, eyes on her as he watched the open wound on her face and arms slowly closed leaving the fresh healed red marks behind. he relaxed when he heard a thank you coming from her, as she checked her healed arms.

“i’m disappointed with you,” he finally broke the silence.

“really?” she frowned. he always does this thing where he will immediately go into lecture mood every time she does something that pisses him off. it’s almost like a game to her as she waited for him to explode, “right now? not even going to wait until i’m discharged. this is a new record, toshi. like shoko said, i’m fine.” he shook his head, “it doesn’t make it right. you always disobeyed me. ignored my orders, going about with your goddamn big head, you could’ve been killed.”

she rolled her eyes, noritoshi is being noritoshi, what a drama queen, she mentally rolled her eyes, “but i’m not,” she pushed her hair back, twisting it easily into a simple loose knot, “i told you, i am not weak.”

“your shikigami was destroyed, your blood was poisoned, 70 percent was already circulating to every part of your vein, i had to beg for the higher up to help purify your blood,” her smile died down. this game no longer feels fun for her. noritoshi was really mad this time. “you think it’s fun and all game but game over, y/n. you need to stop doing this. if you can’t do it for me, do it for yourself.”

“leave me alone, nori, if you just going to nag, please i don’t want to hear it. i’m tired.”

it made him angry that she was taking his word lightly. running his hand in his messy hair, he felt like hauling his head to the wall.

“you don’t understand-”

she slammed her hand on the bed, interrupting his words, “no YOU don’t understand me, i’m tired of you babying me. i’m an adult, i am your wife, stop treating me like a fucking child! we have been married for months, but god you’re suffocating me.”

“i will when you stop endangering yourself. i will stop treating your like a child when you stop acting like one. you’re pregnant, for the love of god!” he threw his hand on the wall. the wall cracked from the force. “i’m what?” she felt the world stopped spinning. she was hundred percent sure that her ears and head were deceiving her. he removed his hand from the hole he made on the wall, his body shaking from the amount of anger building up.

“noritoshi, answer me! what do you mean- i’m not pregnant, i had my period this month.”

“you are,” he shrugged. he felt something hit him in the back; looking down he saw the fluffy white pillow sitting by his feet.

he pointed to the bedside table where a sonogram perched up against a tissue box. she was about to lose her mind. “this is not funny, if this is your mean way of fucking me up because i won’t listen to you then this is just fucking cruel.”

he marched towards him, his hand went down on his chin, forcing her eyes on him, “until you stop playing your stupid games, until you stop treating your life like it’s nothing, until you consider my feelings and my worries, as your husband is valid, i do not exist in your life,” tears fell down her cheeks, “like you, i’m tired too.

“nori i-“

he left her before she could say a word. she broke into sob; her chest was pounding so hard that the blood pressure monitor was beeping. the door burst opened but it was not the face she wanted to see. she was immediately hysterical. satoru managed to hold her wrist down before she ripped the tubes and needles off her arms. “no, no, i want nori. where is he!” she screamed as satoru held her down. “you need to calm down, it’s not good for the baby,” satoru cooed, but she was not having it. he turned to shoko, “her cursed energy is skyrocketing, she’s going hysterical, do something!”

“let me go!”

shoko held out a syringe, “hold her down.”

she screamed, thrashing so rough that she almost slipped out of the strongest sorcerer’s hands. she managed to get a needle out before she felt another sharp pain on her back. shoko pulled the empty needle out and they retreated away as she fell on her butt backward. she was reduced to a babbling mess, her eyes drooped as she struggled to fight the waves of sleepiness hitting her one after another.

“tell him i’m sorry,” she croaked out, before everything turned completely dark.

the blood pressure monitor returned back to normal.

three days later;

“are you still going to ignore her? it’s been 3 days.”

“she needs to learn her place.”

gojo satoru disagreed. he eyed the head of the clan, shaking his head before standing up. he thought he could convince noritoshi kamo to visit his wife, but the man was as stubborn as- huh, her.

“i think she have learned enough, she’s miserable. you’re miserable.”

the man glared at the blonde man child, raising the cup of tea up for a sip. the tea doesn’t taste as good as the way she made it. he left her for 3 days and he found himself struggling to do everything alone.

he, noritoshi kamo, 23 years old and the head of the kamo family, could not make a cup of fucking tea.

she always said that the best way to make tea depends on how long you let it steep. “too early and you won’t get the right amount of flavour,” she explained, her back facing him as he watched from the counter as she loomed over the stove, “but if you steep it way too long you going to burn the tea leaves and it will make everything taste bitter.” she turned around, a huge smile on her face that made his heart skipped a beat.

he frowned; the tea tasted bitter.

“she’s pregnant, she’s supposed to be crazy. you are supposed to be the wise one. she is going to carry your child for 9 long months, i can’t explain to you how long that’s going to be but she is allowed to be crazy.”

he dropped the cup on the floor when gojo’s hand grabbed him by his collar, pulling him up from his chair.

“now please, see your goddamn wife before i deck you in the mouth.”

“i will.”

satisfied with his answer, gojo’s demeanor changed and he was again the man child they all know of him. noritoshi could no longer focus on the report in front of him; not when his mind is full of her and only her.

would she forgive him? he wasn’t sure.

but he would spend his lifetime making up to her and the baby if that’s necessary.

#I FEEL LIKE THIS ONE IS JUST AINT IT AND I MIGHT REMOVE IT #jjk #jjk angst #jujutsu kaisen #kamo noritoshi #noritoshi kamo #noritoshi x y/n #jjk y/n #jujutsu kaisen x y/n #jujutsu kaisen x you #gojo satoru #wild gojo appeared #tw blood #noritoshi x reader #i already have part 3.5 have written tho loool #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #writing: fics

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dillydedalus · 4 years

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september reading

there is literally no way it is september. impossible. anyway this month we have horror, Fake Dating, the rashomon effect, a time war, and most importantly, no neutrals to be found anywhere

the old man & his sons, heðin brú (tr. from faroese by john f. west) published on the faroe islands in 1940 and the first faroese novel to be translated into english, this is a story about the dramatic shift in life style during the 30s on the faroe islands, from hardscrabble subsistence farming/fishing to market economy. interesting look at changing life on isolated isles, and a much lighter (and shorter) take on the stubborn autonomous subsistence farmer than laxness’s independent people. 3/5

the white shroud, antanas škėma (tr from lithuanian by karla gruodis - english/claudia sinnig - german) a modernist, fragmented, nonlinear novel about a lithuanian poet gone into exile, now working as an elevator operator in a new york hotel, who is involved with a married woman but might also be terminally ill. in between the present timeline, the book flashes back (both in the character’s own writing and in third person) to his youth in lithuania, his torture at the hands of the soviet regime, his time at a DP camp in germany and so on. quite interesting, with some great writing. 3/5

things we lost in the fire, mariana enríquez (tr. from spanish by megan mcdowell) really good collection of horror-ish short stories that also touch on gendered violence, child abuse, poverty and argentinian history (esp. dictatorship and disappearances) - some stories are more overtly horror, with clear supernatural elements, others are more ambiguous. i don’t read (or watch) horror stuff so i’m a bad judge of how scary this is - i found it more gruesome and upsetting than terrifying, but the dread is strong in this one. favourites: adela’s house (hungry haunted house), end of term and the title story (women & self-inflictred violence), under the black water (the poisoned oil-choked river is very bad but maybe.... there’s something worse in there). good, vividly gruesome, sharp sharp sharp. 3.5/5

axiom’s end, lindsay ellis i really like lindsay ellis, of all the ~youtube video essayists~ she’s probably my favourite and this book a) has a cool premise - aliens + conspiracies + alien communication and b) a really cool cover, and it’s lindsay, so i was super excited for this one. and it would be unfair to say i was disappointed with it; it’s a fun first contact romp with really good pacing, cool aliens, on-brand lindsay ellis humour and some interesting ideas on communicating with someone who is truly alien and incomprehensible. it’s fine! i enjoyed it and will definitely read the sequel, it’s just... i was hoping it would be AMAZING, and it just wasn’t. no huge problems (except for a few lines i would have liked to take a red pen to), just.... it was fine. 3.5/5

zeno’s conscience, italo svevo (tr. from italian by william weaver) imagine you’re a businessman in trieste who does a little unsuccessful writing on the side and one day you decide to take english lessons to improve your business opportunities with the uk and your english teacher is JAMES FUCKING JOYCE who tells you that you need to keep writing. incredible. anyway these are the autobiographical notes of one zeno cosini, a hapless hypochondriac smug self-delusional fool, who just cannot quite quit smoking, marries the one sister out of three he least desires, & works as an accountant (for the man who married his most-desired of said sisters) despite his rather tenuous grasp on bookkeeping. my favourite scene is when his future sister in law (2nd most desired) complains lightly about her difficulties with latin, he tells her that he believes latin is a man’s language and even roman ladies probably didn’t actually speak it, only for her to correct him on a latin quotation. i will say tho that this book is way to long to maintain the endearingness and often drags. 3/5 tfw u write for an audience of one but that one is james joyce so fair enough

der hund/der tunnel/die panne, friedrich dürrenmatt dürrenmatt (in addition to having a cool-ass name) really fucking slaps! his stuff is really good, and often really really wild. these three stories are all weird & slightly existentially scary, two degrees left of reality, and just. so interesting! we have a man stalking a street preacher and his monstrous dog, a train going through a tunnel for way too long (and it is very scary), and a man becoming involved in a pretend-trial (or is it) and becoming convinced that he actually is a murderer (or is he, really?). anyway, dürrenmatt.... slaps. 4/5

wow, no thank you., samantha irby a mix of memoir and comedy blogpost and social critique blogpost about growing up poor & black, dating while fat, chronic illness, and settling down in rural america. it’s fine. i haven’t read irby’s previous collections so maybe i’m missing that emotional connection, but i thought it was mostly...okay?? not especially funny imo & i prefered the more serious chapters of which there weren’t enough. 2/5

they say in harlan county: an oral history, alessandro portelli really impressive oral history about life in harlan county, appalachia, focusing on the labor strikes and conflicts in the 30s and 40s, but really exploring life and politics in the region from the first non-native settlement there to today. really interesting, sometimes inspiring and often infuriating and probably worth reading if you’ve ever listened to which side are you on. 4/5

rashomon & other stories, ryunosuke akutagawa (tr. from japanese by jay rubin) fun fact: if you read the short story “rashomon” expecting to get the, y’know, rashomon effect, you won’t get it bc the film actually takes its plot from the story “in a grove”. anyway this is an interesting collection of classic japanese short stories, many of which are actually about unreliable witnesses/narrators. i particularly enjoyed “in a grove” and the truly disturbing “hell screen”, but found this particular collection just a bit too long. 3/5

women without men, shahrnush parsipur (tr. from farsi by kamran talatoff & joceyln sharlet) a magical realist feminist novella about 5 women in iran who all try to liberate themselves from men in one way or another, more or less successfully (one of them turns into a tree, another becomes undead), until they end up in a semi-utopian garden together for a time. disturbing in its depiction oppression and sexual/gendered violence. i don’t really know how i feel about it, but it’s a really unique and interesting reading experience; very fraught and ambivalent in the end. 3.5/5

take a hint, dani brown, talia hibbert i think this is the first actual pure genre-romance book i’ve read... in years??possibly ever? idk. anyway this is mostly a pretty fun & sweet story about ambitious & emotionally constipated phd student dani brown and security guy with tragic past zaf ansari, who begin a fake relationship for Various Reasons (as you do) and both develop Real Feelings (as you do, predictably). it’s mostly really enjoyable but man i’m really not used to Romance writing & it’s a lot. in the end everyone is very genuine & earnest & emotionally honest which.... not to be even more emotionally repressed than dani but i cannot deal with that. anyway given that 2020 truly is the gift that keeps on giving this was a fun fluffy delight & i might read more from the series. 3.5/5

this is how you lose the time war, amal el-mohtar & max gladstone two agents (red and blue) on opposing sides of a time war (the futuristic techy Agency vs the eco/organic Garden - neither of them is Good or Bad exactly) start writing letters as they hunt each other through the strands of time’s braid and eventually (inevitably) fall in love. really interesting concept of time travel and different timelines (if, like me, you conceptualise past as down and future as up, this will trip you up so much), very lyrical writing that sometimes toes the line to overwritten but mostly really works. 3.5/5

DNF: the madman of freedom square & the iraqi christ, hassan blasim (tr. from arabic by jonathan wright, german tr. by hartmut fähndrich) bindup of these two short story collections about iraq. these are incredibly brutal, depressing & horrifying stories about a country in a constant state of war & struggle. couldn’t bear it, probably not ever & certainly not right now.

allegro pastell, leif randt (audio) this is brilliant, bitingly funny novel about a millenial couple, tanja & jerome, and their on-and-off long distance relationship. they are privileged (and half-aware of it), attractive, successful, very in touch with their own feelings (couldn’t be me), self-reflective, faintly ironic in everything bc sincerity might be cringe, and you will hate them. these are people who perform their feelings rather than feel them, dissect all their opinions and impulses to the point of both paralysis and narcissism, engage in constant navelgazing and cannot form any relationship that isn’t based in constant evaluation and judgment. they pride themselves on their nonconformity but are really the greatest conformists of all, and the most square, boring, spießig people under the veneer of their urban liberal drug-and-club lifestyle. had so much fun with it even as i was constantly cringing at these people. 4/5

#the books i read #long post

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starfxckersinc · 4 years

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Omg your tags... Can you talk more about your songwriting pls? I'm at that point now where I'm just trying to finish as many songs as I can, not caring so much abt the quality bc otherwise I will never finish one. I still only have a few, I'm trying to learn the process and what works for me. But it's so encouraging to hear someone else talk abt this like I keep comparing myself to famous ppl I listen to and it feels like they just have a gift and I don't

dude, I have been comparing myself to artists I look up to constantly, ever since I got into music at fourteen, wondering why I’m not good enough. I think it’s normal. The truth is, when you stop listening so much to beginner’s self doubt, perfectionism, and in my case, chronic anxiety, everybody is the same. The people who are really good are really good because they sat down and fucked around with instruments long enough to understand them, the people who are really good are really good because they love what they do, and all of them wrote shitty songs in their late teens/early 20s/whenever they started out. I have(and still do) beat myself up for everything from writing too fast to writing too slow, for taking months long breaks because of mental health issues, for lyrics that my band laughed at, for only knowing how to play one instrument, the list goes on...But I comfort myself with facts like these:

PJ Harvey was asked about her first ever song in an interview from 1995 and that’s the closest I’ve seen her come to blushing; She said it was about a girl going on an adventure and that it was awful. She reiterated in a magazine that most of her earliest work was ‘terrible’ and heavily influenced by Irish folk music, meaning, apparently, that it was full of tin whistles. It took her years before she was comfortable playing her orginal music in front of other people(and if you watch her early Dry performances, she’s not even all that comfortable in the first place.) The important thing is, PJ Harvey hated her early songs.

Nick Cave said that he was ashamed of the Birthday Party’s discography up until Junkyard and that he didn’t like to think about those albums. Nick Cave hated his early songs- And Nick Cave is partially famous DUE to these early songs, go figure.

Courtney Love bashes Hole’s first album Pretty On The Inside nearly constantly, calling it ‘unlistenable’ and saying it was more about her persona being established than making good music. Courtney Love hated her early songs- and, once again, her band was given its name and image because of them.

I BEG you to listen to five seconds of David Bowie’s first album, which he doesn’t discuss.

If these people, who mean the world to me and have saved hoards of others from personal destruction, had given up bc they were Bad at a young and inexperienced age we wouldn’t have their music and it’s not an exaggeration to say that that would have ended in suicide for a big number of people. If you can get your ego in place, you can believe the same about your music, and the thing that’s going to keep you motivated more than anything else is Ego.

We live in a world right now where popular music lacks human hands and clumsiness and rawness and so the fact that both of us are, against the odds, composing music that still reflects those things is a rebellion. It’s important that we keep writing, not just because we deserve to be good songwriters because we care about it, but because for music to evolve there needs to be a constant underground of young people with limited skills trying their best. Plus, if we’re both lucky, we’ll end up saving people the same way we were saved and if it takes a few notebooks of three note trauma songs to get there then fine(besides, who doesn’t love a good three-note trauma song?).

But beyond the ‘glory’ of it(and I think to do anything artistic you have to romanticize it to a certain degree), I started songwriting seriously at the end of a bad relationship when I was sixteen, nearly seventeen. When that relationship ended, I wrote constantly. I wrote about everything. My main influences were Bikini Kill and The Runaways and I hadn’t developed my seriousness towards lyrics yet so anything went. I’d write three songs in a week, realize that two were bad and play the third one for my band only to get laughed at for writing something like “I swallow Clorox” which was a confessional thing about suicidal thoughts that hurt my feelings, but wasn’t articulated well.

I wrote Nirvana knock-off songs and I wrote Hole knock-off songs and I half finished at least one hundred different things and I have three notebooks filled with them, the latter half being the worst fake-Nick Cave writing I have ever read. From all of 2018, during which I probably wrote 30-35 songs, I have two that I would actually put on an album and three that I can remember/still like. Once I got my mental health under control, I did the same thing for the bulk of 2019. This stage you’re at is NOTHING TO FEEL BAD ABOUT. It’s like making stuff out of Play-Doh or fingerpainting. It’s FUN and you’re learning, Extremely Quickly, a million different skills that you’re going to need over the course of your life. Lyric writing, the classic verse/chorus/verse, how to invert that, experimental tactics, particular playing styles that you like, playing styles that you HATE, etc.

And the best part about it is that some of your songs are good! Some of them have good parts that you’ll take out later to put into better songs! You’re probably sitting on two or three good songs at the moment, maybe even more, maybe you’ve got a whole album of brilliant material and you just don’t know it. In thirty years your demos could work like Vashti Bunyan’s and be the proto-whatever of a new genre. I really don’t want to make you think that all your material right now is bad, because that idea has actually been super detrimental to me and is a shitty narrative pushed to push beginners. I’m saying that it’s OKAY for you to be bad, that even experienced people write bad shit, but that if you think you’ve written some bangers they deserve to be recognized as such.

To close, new phase that I was talking about, the quality over quantity phase, is definitely something I had to work up to. 90% of it is taking in enough new music to understand what you really want from yourself, and the rest of it is gaining enough confidence to willingly let other people hear what you do. I only started taking my shit this seriously in late December of last year because I knew people would be hearing it, and that has its set backs too: My perfectionism is crazy right now and I have to kick back against it all the time. The perks of getting to the point where you can hone yourself are that you build real relationships with your songs, and that you have some idea of what you want. But I also think that it’s healthy to go through the quantity over quality phase over and over again throughout the course of your career, because there’s no way to really write in a new style unless you keep going back to frenzied experimentation. If we both end up pursuing this long term, we’ll probably have to work on Finishing over Perfecting a million times over, and its best to make peace with it now.

I am so sorry that this is like. A million paragraphs but another important aspect of songwriting is procrastinating by being on tumblr so!!! You’re doing just fine. Keep up the good work, and feel free to talk to me or share music with me anytime. I hope this helps, or at least isn’t a boring read.

#aberdeen spoken word #livs music #i took actually maybe an hour and 45 minutes to write this so look at me and my accomplishmentssss

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minraki-blog · 5 years

Text

love sick

synopsis: being left at home with your brothers best friend shouldn’t mean anything, but you were sick and he just didn’t know he was already in love

warnings: swearing, i skimmed through this so some words might be spelled wrong

genre: fluff, angst??

wc: 2.7k

so you had been sick the entire week

and honestly you being sick would’ve worked any other week, but not this week

your parents had gone back to Australia which meant that your older brother, Chan, would be looking after you

and that wasn’t a problem

he was responsible and was very caring towards you

it’s just that

he has a lot of stuff to do

busy boy

but you were an understanding little sister so you took care of yourself for the most part

you didn’t hate chan for not being able to be your servant 25/8

but today, was not that same type of day chief

“CHAN! CHRIS! HELPPPP!” you coughed out in your raspy voice

you tried yelling to the best of your abilities but instead, they came out in strained whispers

it didn’t even make sense for you to call his name out considering he wasn’t home

“CHAN!” you yelled out a bit louder and thank lord Chan had finally gotten home

and thank lord his hearing was great because he could barely hear your cries

running up the stairs he opened the door to your room, rushing to your side in a second

“Everything okay?”

your eyes fluttered open and you saw Chan beside you

but you felt another presence

you saw minho leaning on your doorframe

looking at you with curiosity and empathy

“yea, I’m fine.” you coughed out, looking back at your brother

“I need more medicine Chan.”

and he kinda just looked at you and then at minho with a ‘how tf did you run out already’ type of look

“Two weeks ago. Felix. Dare. Drank half the bottle.” you summed up causing Chan to facepalm

“idiot”

he sighed and got up, walking out into the hallway to talk to minho

“Can you please look after her while I go get her medicine?”

“But doesn’t she usually look after herself?”

“Yeah but today’s not the same. She looks weaker.”

Minho leaned into your room and saw you fiddling with one of the hundreds of blankets covering you

cute.

“look, Minho please? I’ll pay you?”

“how much?”

“20?”

“fine.”

and so that’s how minho and you ended up on your bed watching stupid videos on your phone

you were comfortable around each other so your head rested on his shoulder as you both sat against the wall

he held your phone as you both giggled at the tiny screen

a compilation full of vines was currently playing and you both couldn’t help but fill the room with laughter

and minho would be a fool if he said he didn’t love the way your laugh sounded

and you’d be a fool for the same reason

then you got a notification from your group chat

‘y/n when are you gonna stop being sick so you can hang out with us?’

‘you know she hates hanging out with us bc she’s third-wheeling hard!’

‘lmaooo I keep forgetting she’s like hella single’

‘no one has ever liked her skshsk’

minho did not like the current texts popping up on the screen

meanwhile, you were scared that he read them

“are these your friends?” he asked, pausing the video and clicking on the next text that popped up

he flipped the phone vertically and read the messages more

he even read the gc name ‘it’s 2019 and y/n is still single’

“Does Chan know about this?”

“no.” you whispered, readjusting your head on his shoulder

you pouted at the screen

“so you didn’t answer my question, are these your friends?”

“i guess.” you sighed, not wanting to address the students as your friends

Minho’s overprotective side kicked in when he saw that they started to make fun of you even more

“what the hell?”

“don’t worry minho, they’re just playing around.”

“one of them just called you a whole ass loser? I don’t think that’s playing around anymore y/n.” he said sternly, starting to type harshly into the chat

“minho, please don’t do anything. They scare me.” you say defeated, causing the boy to stop typing and look at you with so much care and concern

he put the phone beside him and picked your head up, making you look at him as he turned his position

“what do you mean, they scare you?”

“they just,, they make fun of me and always joke about me being single. Like they were cool when I first met them and they’re still pretty cool but the jokes just hurt me a lot. Like am I really that ugly? Do I really have such a bad personality that no one wants to date me?”

and minho being the albert einstein of the century goes and says

“why don’t you just be my girlfriend?”

you choked on nothing

okay maybe you choked because there was a cough coming and it just happened to be perfect timing bUT STILL

“minho, what?”

“be my girlfriend. well. fake girlfriend that is.”

the thought of it was extraordinary. The fact that you’d be dating one of the most popular boys in school would be crazy. Your ‘friends’ would stop bugging you and making fun of you. And you had to admit you would be dating one of the few hot guys at your school.

“you know Chan would instantly kill you.”

“but if we told him why—“

“minho you know we can’t tell him why.”

“so then he can just think you’re my real girlfriend like everyone else.”

“but—“

“you’re my girlfriend now, okay? At least until they like, stop being such asses to you. Got it?”

you huffed out and looked at him pouting

“wow my girlfriend is the cutest!”

minho honestly really did find you attractive and wouldn’t mind dating you, but the feelings weren’t there along with it

but he was close enough with you to have the feeling of wanting to protect you instead of needing to protect you. There was a difference between the two.

so that’s how you two ended up walking into school, hand in hand, Monday moring on your first day back from being sick

everyone was shocked

and trust me, everyone’s eyes were on the two of you

even teachers

Chan’s mouth hung wide open while his eyes were wide too

the rest of the group of boys were also pretty stunned at the sudden

??relationship??

“hi guys!” you waved, with your free hand

“what? you? and you? and what? why?! hUH!” Chan really didn’t know what to say

“is this why you didn’t wanna walk to school with me today?! bECAUSE YOU WANTED TO WALK WITH HIM?” Chan asked and you blushed at the thought

“yea...” you said softly and Chan scoffed

he was more jealous than mad

he was used to being your walking partner and being the one you showed up to school with, bUT NO

NOW IT’S MINHO WHO’S TAKEN OVER

“what all happened when I left to get your medicine?!” Chan asked and right at that moment, the bell rung

“gOTTA BLAST!” minho yelled, and you two quickly walked away

Without even knowing, Minho had walked you to your class

“You know my classes?”

“I may have looked at your schedule once or twice when you were in the kitchen making sandwiches for Chan and I that one time.” he replied with a laugh

you shook your head, giggling at the boy

“I’ll see you at the door after 4th and we’ll go to lunch together, alright?”

you nodded your head with a smile causing minho to smile too

“I’ll see you soon princess.” he said and kissed your forehead and waved you goodbye

and you couldn’t lie, you got pretty used to all this

every day he walked you to school, then to class, kissed your forehead and would walk you to lunch and then out of his own will, he’d even text you as if you two were dating even if no one was there to trick

he pampered you with kisses, except on the lips because you made a rule about that

he loved giving you hugs no matter where you were

every time he was over, he always addressed you as babe or princess which made your heart flutter but Chan would throw up in his mouth a little each time at the cheesiness

“gET A ROOM!” he’d continuously say as he’d look over at minho feeding you a piece of popcorn during a movie

to which you would both respond with, “SHUSH THE MOVIE IS PLAYING!”

oh and sometimes, even when chan or your parents weren’t home, he’d still come over to see you and you two would just cuddle in your bed, watching a movie or show or even just more vines

you two had become a very powerful and well-known duo

a lot of people had grown to love the two of you together and so many and i mean, SO MANY people shipped you guys

it was kinda scary

like lowkey Chan even shipped it

you two had grown closer and closer throughout this whole fake dating thing and it honestly felt like you two were in a real relationship

and you’d be a fool if you were to say that you hadn’t caught just a few little feelings for him during this process

which made everything even worse

“hey, is anyone over?” you currently sat on your bed doing your homework as you heard minho’s voice echo through the phone

“no, Chan just left for work and my parents are on another business trip.”

“okay, I’m coming over.”

you had to admit, Minho did sound pretty out of it but nonetheless, you got ready to see him

“So I think it’s been long enough and I’m pretty sure we can stop this whole dating thing now.” he said, his voice monotone

he seemed like he had no feelings whatsoever

“oh, yeah?” you questioned, pushing away the feeling of your heart clenching

“yeah. I think it’s best. We’ve been going for four months now and people have died down about us and your friends stopped bugging you. I think now’s a perfect chance.” he reasoned and he was right

but you didn’t want any of this to stop

and neither did he

“Yeah, you’re right. Thanks for helping me out of that whole situation by the way.” you tried laughing away the thoughts of getting teased again but instead your laugh only came out bitter.

he could hear the hurt in your voice

“No problem, but I got to go now. Dance practice is in 30.”

“yea, of course. I’ll see you around.”

and with that he was out the door

no one ever said changing someone’s name in your phone could hurt that bad, especially when the name wasn’t even supposed to mean anything

and no one ever said dancing to a song that wasn’t even close to reminding someone of a certain somebody could cause so much anger with themselves to the point where they’d release it all through dancing

it was hell for the both of you

because in the end, you both caught feelings

so now for the past week it’s been you and chan back together again, walking to school, him walking you to your classes, and him walking you home

but nothing felt the same

you had grown so attached to minho that it didn’t feel right now having him by your side

you missed him

a lot

and like everyone could tell

even minho

he kept his distance from you like any normal person would after a break-up but truth is, all he wanted to do was cuddle you and shower you with kisses the way he did before

he hated to admit it but he had fallen for his best friends little sister

things weren’t easier for you after the break-up

minho didn’t mean to make things worse

he didn’t

it was just the mindset of your ‘friends’

instead of getting made fun of for being single, you were now made fun of for being broken up with by the hottest dude in school

and this didn’t go unnoticed by minho

he promised himself he wouldn’t intervene but one day it had gone too far

“where’s your boyfriend y/n? Off with someone new?”

“minho wouldn’t do that.”

“You know he never liked you. It was probably a dare or something!”

they all laughed at this remark

“again, minho isn’t like that. I’ve known him for like five years. He’s never done that.”

“that doesn’t mean he’s not willing to try it with you.”

your friends smirked at you, surrounding you as they cornered you against the locker

minho had been watching the whole scene from behind a wall

and when one of them had finally chosen to lay a hand on you, he had to step in

running towards the group, he pushed away one of the boys standing around you and stood protectively in front of you

“what the fuck is your problem?” minho asked harshly, all his anger boiling up

“aww look who’s here to protect his ex-girlfriend!!” one of the girls mocked, causing minho to grow angrier

“who says we ever broke up?” minho asked, reaching for your hand to hold

he squeezed it tightly in reassurance

“then why has she been so depressed lately? Everyone knows you broke up min, give it a rest.”

“her cat died, do you expect her to be happy if a pet that she’s grown up with since birth has just died?” it was the best lie minho could think of at the moment and since god was in his favor, these idiots actually believed him

“so you never broke up?”

“no, of course not. I’d never do that to her.”

“then why were you never with her?”

“she needed her space.”

“how do we know you’re not lying?”

“because...I’m?? not??”

“kiss her then.”

he turned to face you, looking down at your nervous figure

he brought his hand up, softly rubbing at your cheek, reassuring you everything would be okay

he nodded at you

and you nodded at him

and in a matter of seconds, his lips were on yours

it felt like fireworks for the both of you

his lips tasted like strawberries while yours tasted like cinnamon

the feeling of your lips against his made his stomach do backflips

he had always wondered what it would feel like to kiss you and it was so much better than he had ever dreamed

he pulled you closer, your bodies colliding with each other

you wrapped your arms around his neck, playing with the hairs on his nape

you were both so lost in the moment and you both loved every second of it

finally pulling away, he rested his head against yours as you both caught your breaths

“I love you.” he breathed out

“I love you too minho.” you said, burying your head into his chest

he held you close, turning to talk to your friends

“See I to- where’d they go?”

you moved your head to look and saw they were gone too

“I think you proved your point to them.” you said with a giggle, causing him to smile

“do you mean it?” he asked as you started to walk hand in hand down the hall

“that I love you?” he nodded

“I mean everything I’ve ever said to you in our ‘relationship’.”

“even the part where you said you wouldn’t mind really being mine?”

you shyly looked down and nodded, a smile forming on your face

“well lucky for you, I like you a lot and I really wanna be with you.” minho said casually, causing you to blush harder

he stopped in his tracks, making you stop too

grabbing your face gently, he made you look up at him

“will you be my girlfriend?” he asked, with the most genuine smile

“of course.” you replied, shyly planting a kiss to his lips

and so that’s how you and minho ended up becoming a real couple this time

and people still loved the idea of you two together

the lie of your cat dying stuck and it even spread around school

so when Chan finally found out he apparently had a cat that died, he almost freaked out because he really thought you had been hiding a cat from him this entire time

“hyung, how stupid are you?”

“wAIT SO IS SOONIE ACTUALLY OUR CAT?!”

“Chan, sweetie. no.”

and you all lived happily ever after

and this time the prince and princess weren’t faking it

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wannawrite · 5 years

Text

not my type

who?: Wanna One’s Ong Seongwoo genre: 🌸 type: bullet point

blog navigator.

University! AU

you don’t date younger guys

but you just might ;)

thanks for requesting! this was quite difficult to write since I am a child still lol. Do note that Seongwoo is 20 in this work of fiction. ⁃ admin l

disclaimer: pictures used do not belong to me and credit goes to their original owners everything that is written here is purely fictional DO NOT READ IF TRIGGERING

so,,,your love life

not that exciting

in fact, it is facing a drought at the moment

reality is harsh huh?

or maybe it is because of your high standards

1. No younger guys

2. Must be a nice person

3. Someone I could foresee marrying

but none of your blind dates left you impressed

and then there’s this kid from the music block called Ong Seongwoo

he’s just one of the guys trying to worm his way into your ‘possible boyfriend’ list

scarily enough, his tactics were working

we gon throw this waayyy back when y’all met

frat parties were never your thing

in fact, f*ck linda and this stupid party, I just want to go home and sleep

you love your roommate and all but you couldn’t help but curse her out

after all, she had dragged you to this party thrown by one of the music department frat guys

and left you stranded

in a hallway with at least 3 couples passionately making out

tonight was not your night at all

you hated the loud, shitty music and the smell of sweat and liquor

appalling

but linda was your ride here and there was a slim chance of hailing a cab right now

you had no choice but to suck it up and rough it out

Another issue

you needed to finish that essay on sustainable fashion before the 6am deadline

shit

gr8 job prof

all-nighter?

borrow a laptop from someone and do it now?

what the hell

which person would bring a laptop to a frat party?

unless you can break into one of their rooms and take one??1?1?11

you almost slap yourself at the idea

dumb worried bitch energy

sis is out of ideas and just wants to graduate be a little empathetic, folks

you want to sit down on the floor and sink into a puddle of goo

oh no

there’s no way you are going to maintain this 3.9 GPA lmaoo

you move to wrestle Linda away from one of the frat guys

but hollers and cheers stop you

a group of guys block your path as they welcome yet another friend

but get this! the newcomer has a laptop case in his hands!!

he appears to have just come from a lecture or meeting

bUT HE HAS A LAPTOP YAYAYAYAYA

now, all you had to do was to stalk him, suck up to him and steal borrow the device

sucking up to one of these frat boys was easy

their brains had been bruised with bud lights so they weren’t the brightest of the bunch

before you know it, he’s whisked away by his friends and dissolved into the crowd

crap

you really, genuinely, wholly, need this laptop

They would help a fellow college student in need, right?

left with no choice, you elbow your way through

I suppose your efforts pay off

bc you catch him as he’s headed upstairs

barely

“hey!” you yell over the noise. “I-I...”

the mystery guy only stares, quizzically

suddenly, you’ve lost all ability to form coherent sentences

this is embarrassing!

hE JUST LOOKING

sis gotta calm down

remember the real reason: laptop

“c-can i borrow your laptop real quick? I have a d-deadline tonight”

mystery boy says nothing

...

“What’s it in for me? If i lend you my laptop?”

he tries to remain serious but the corners of his mouth are tugging up

sneaky

desperation is pretty much flooding your body

you wld say f*ck it but you can’t

“I’ll owe you a favour!” you blurt out thoughtlessly.

*crickets chirping*

hope is slowly beginning to fade and your brain is coming up with extension excuses

just crumbs,,,anything

Orbits gg thru with the drought

when he goes

“okay”

JESUS THANK YOU

he beckons for you to follow him

oh?😏😉

“I know a better work environment than here.”

oh.

“What’s your name? I’m y/n, it’s my third year.”

“Woah, third year? my name’s ong seongwoo. I just got here.”

huh, freshman

seongwoo doesn’t say much after

he leads you to a common study area in the enormous fraternity house

you turn away as he sets up the laptop and everything bc privacy!!!

but the number of brain cells you have left won’t allow you to remember his login details anyway

“thanks,” you murmur bashfully

well, this is an expected and rather awkward situation

seongwoo plants himself in the chair a few seats away from yours

he pulls out study materials from his backpack

??? hello? sis, u shld be enjoying the party downstairs ???

you try to shift your fullest attention on your project

but!! his presence alone is so loud prominent, it’s giving you a hard time keeping your eyes off😔🤧

anyway u manage to suck it up and finish paper and submit it just in time!

a miracle

maybe he is your angel ;)

you turn to face him and,,,seongwoo has fallen asleep!! on his books!!

his hair is slightly tousled and his glasses rest askew on his face

papers flap in his face but he’s too gone to care

the poor child is tired

💓💖💕soft hours💕💖💓: open

gently, you tap his shoulder

“seongwoo? hey, um, your laptop,”

he only stirs the 2nd time you call him

Cute

groggily, he covers his face and speaks into his hands

he mumbles something about ‘dealing with it later’

you figure it would be best if you left him alone to nap

suddenly, seongwoo grabs your arm

at least, he reaches for it

“I need your number to claim that favour.”

my number ????

for half a second, your heart does pitter patters

he’s only being objective though...

and it was you who suggested it in the first place

sighing, you punch your number into his phone

“okay, but use it wisely and...try not to...call or text so much...”

that sounds rlly mean >:(

“yeah i’ll keep that in mind.”

there’s an underlying layer of...cheekiness? in seongwoo’s tone

your brain jumps to the first conclusion it can think of

“I don’t date younger guys, Seongwoo,”

rEGRET FILLS YOUR ENTIRE BEING IMMEDIATELY AFTER

now, Seongwoo looks up and beams broadly

“Bold of you to assume I’m interested,” he taunts playfully

red sinks into your face and you defend yourself in splutters

“I’m not interested in general! I’m prioritising my studies and everything else! It was just to make sure you know where we stand-“

futile, really

“relax,” he replies. “Just saying, I could change your mind.”

Cocky

but true lol

an amused scoff leave your lips and your arms go akimbo

“I’d like to see you try, freshman.”

*back to the present*

You: really, Seongwoo. I don’t see why you can’t drop by the printing station yourself

Seongwoo: you are seated RIGHT NEXT to it. Just fold the papers into aeroplanes and fly them over

You: a 15-page research paper ?? That clearly says ‘do not bend’

Seongwoo: ignore it. Throw it over

you never predicted this was where life would take you

here you were, sat in the library, the table by the printing room

and Seongwoo was seated a few tables away, texting you to collect his freshly printed document

just because

You: Oh my god shut up you’ll get points deducted if your paper is the least bit crumpled

You: i’ll just bring it over

so,,,you did

you brought seongwoo’s papers over to his table

he had been watching from afar, lips pulled into a dumb smile

“thank you, senior.”

boy had the audacity to say that in front of your salad

just to tease him, you reply:

“yeah, senior, just how I like my future boyfriend.”

with that remark, the smile slips off seongwoo’s face and his jaw clenches

but he tries to play it off all cool😎🤧

you shoot the sweetest smile you can muster before skipping back to your table

*beep beep*

I nearly put vibrate -

Seongwoo: that doesn’t count as using my favour card!

your head shakes, but your mouth smiles

it was no secret that seongwoo had a small! crush on you

even if it was, everyone knew

his whole frat and most of his seniors

your friends and roommates

the whole bloody campus

this relationship started out with seongwoo following you on ig

then occasionally dropping a text and wishing you well

he also hyped up all your pics

and said hi whenever you bumped into each other

it escalated to meeting up for brunch or a movie

just...as friends, casually

but you enjoyed his company and goofing around much more than some blind dates

now, texting him was a regular

going out was common

and you haven’t even counted the number of times you guys met at social events

sometimes, he made you feel so✨ special, precious, wanted by doing the smallest things

like a tea on your table

or going the extra mile to cheer you up

most of the time at the expense of his handsome face

he was always,,,there

you did find out about his feelings, though he never addressed them fully

it was fun!! to press his buttons as a friend

“yeah idk abt dating someone younger. Wbu?”

“Hmm. Senior year makes everyone 10x hotter.”

thOSE WERE JOKES

BANTER, PEOPLE, BANTER

but...you weren’t certain if that would turn into something more

you know, you hadn’t given dating someone younger a thought

it never crossed your mind

maybe it was a subconscious deal breaker

you were always quick to bring age into making deals

old broken deals could be made new

the concept was incredibly foreign

my boyfriend? younger?

Personally, you could never see that happen

b-but seongwoo made you sO DAMN HAPPY ALL THE TIME

there was sunshine in his smiles

and starlight in his eyes

ᵕ꒳ᵕ

uGh fEELINGS

but is this attraction?

Eventually, after many sleepless nights, up thinking about this, you made up your mind

If he made a move first,

bc ur scared

you would be hella open to dating him

f*ck that ‘older people only’ rule

(⁄˘⁄ ⁄ ω⁄ ⁄ ˘⁄)♡

[3.06am] seongwoo leaves a voicemail. He says, “hey, will you go on a date with me? I like you.”

[3.14am] seongwoo leaves another voicemail. “I’ll use my favour card if I have to. Just give me a chance.”

anD HOLY F*CK YOU DON’T knOW HOW TO ACT AFTER HEARING THOSE

RIGHT WHEN YOU WAKE UP

yOur heaRT IS FLUTTERING AND YOU CAN FEEL THE BLUSH COMING

UGH SWEETHEART YOU GOT IT BAD

so u jump on this bandwagon and call him asap

it goes straight to voicemail but you don’t leave one

hehe

you know,,,to build suspense

all day long, that’s all you can think about

SeoNGWOO LIKES ME?

[8.17am] seongwoo wakes up to a silent voicemail from you

he doesn’t know what to think of it

he dials your number with shaking hands and before you can utter a word, he rushes, “meet me at xxx cafe at 11am”

then hangs up

Tumblr: 101 cafe date outfit ideas

Seongwoo arrives early and orders a drink while waiting

he also picks out a window booth to sit at

his nerves could eat him alive if they teamed up

what would you say to him?

how badly did you react to his 3am confession

getting mildly intoxicated on Daniel’s stash was a horrible idea

he spilt all his secret uwus

the bell chimes

and all his attention is focused on you

your eyes land on him

a smile graces your face as you walk over

“I like you too.”

“Damn, you better not be messing with me right now,” seongwoo nervously chuckles. “I know I sent you th-“

“Oh my god! I like you!”

For a moment, his smart mouth runs dry, surprised

“Oh wow, what happened to your older guys only rule?”

You smack his chest in mock annoyance

“Rules are made to be broken! Let’s not talk about that.” You turn various shades of red

Grinning like the Chesire cat, Seongwoo teases, “And that’s the beauty of it.”

#admin l #wanna one #wanna one scenarios #ong seongwoo

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