born to die
morpheus x reader
warnings: slight yandere themes if you really really really look, death, reincarnation, diy abortion, pregancy (for a little while)
one day, you died. and then, you came back. one minute you were a grown woman and the next, in the body of a little boy. it never hurt to die, but you always remember. you remember everything. it left you disoriented the first time, coming back. you felt scared, always crying, screaming for your lost family, but soon it became too tiring. too exhausting to mourn for people you had loved, too exhausting to love and know you’ll never spend eternity with them. it was your own damn fault, of course, not realizing what you had agreed to.
“what are you doing here?” silence filled your apartment as you stare at the man in front of you.
“i felt your yearn for me.” Morpheus says, gently. he moves towards you. instinctively, you take a step back. your back presses against the wall.
“i- i don’t know what you’re talking about. you’re not real. i’m just dreaming.” he steps closer to you, only inches away now.
“my dove,” Morpheus carcasses your check with a cold hand. you lean into it. “i am no dream. i’m back… for you.”
“no, Morpheus. we can’t.” you press your eyes closed as tears well. you love him, but the gods have said that a mortal and an endless don’t belong, their story always ends in heartbreak. he had told you himself when you had met for the first time.
it was your first life. the beginning. you were once royalty, you bathed in wealth and riches. your father, the duke, spoiled you rotten and your mother, although strict, always gave you what you wanted. no matter what you asked. so, you’ve never wanted to love or romance. what was the need for temporary feelings when you can fill your heart with gold.
“magician, why have you requested the audience of the duke?” your father’s chamberlain questioned. a man stood before him, dressed in black from head to toe. he adorned a cloak that shimmered as it moved, and with the right angle, you could see glittering stars and galaxies on the inside. a strange aura surrounded him, you couldn’t feel any magic like from magicians you have met before, but there was something about him you couldn’t place. he says something in response, but you couldn’t hear. his voice was quiet, but it felt like the ground rumbled as he spoke. you shake your head, believing you must have lost your mind.
“boo.” someone whispers into your ear. you jump and turn in surprise. your handmaiden laughs loudly at your display. you quickly cover her mouth.
“shh! i’m watching the new magician!” you whisper, you turn back and your handmaiden peeks over your shoulder to watch the magician walk through the doors. he pauses, you both still, he turns and you see him. he was… beautiful. you had never seen a man so alluring. his eyes meet yours; your heart feels like it has stopped. his eyes swirl with different colors, it reminds you of the night sky. his face betrays no emotion as he tilts his head and examines you, but you can feel his gaze soften. he turns back and walks into the great hall.
you don’t see him after that, not for a couple days. in those days, you felt a strange emptiness. you had never felt such longing before. you’re not sure what to make of it. you fill this emptiness by going out, buying beautiful dresses and jewelry, but nothing worked. you stand at your balcony, leaning your head against your arm, your ache weighing you down. you watch the sky darken and watch the trees sway in the light wind. suddenly, you see something in the garden, someone. your ache disappears, replaced with giddiness. you pulled on a coat over your nightdress and snuck outside, carefully avoiding the servants and guards. you make your way to the garden and see your mysterious magician sitting at a bench, facing the roses. you quietly come and sit next to him. neither one of you say anything, content to sit in each other’s company.
“i had requested for these roses to be planted.” you say, keeping your eyes on the red roses. you remember when you had asked for the garden to be made. it was your 15th birthday, you had made a passing comment about how a garden would look nice outside your room and by the next week, your parents had started planting and building. you smile, reminiscing your childhood. he hums, you could feel the vibrations of his voice in your chest.
“it’s beautiful.” his voice was deep, elegant. it was soothing. every ache, every pain, every awful feeling you had when you hadn’t seen him, it washed away. you let out a small breath.
“your voice is very beautiful.” you say, looking at him. he looks at you, a small smile dances across his lips. you smile back, “has my father appointed you as our mage?” you turn back towards the roses.
“perhaps.” his voice was traced with mirth and you grin.
“you’re very mysterious, magician, i’m sure i’ll see you again.”
“i’m sure you will, my lady.”
soon months passed and you fell in love, your magician had told you his name was draumey, seemed to fall in love with you as well. he came to you every night, in wake and in sleep. the two of you talked for hours. he would soon confess his true identity, Morpheus, lord of the dreaming.
“i don’t understand, why can’t we be together?” he shakes his head, his annoyance obvious on his face.
“mortals and endless cannot be together, (y/n).” he states with finality. tears stream down your face, and Morpheus turns away from you, unable to watch as his lover crumbles. “it ends in a tragedy, it was foretold in the beginning of everything.” Morpheus tries to explain to you, but you break down into sobs. his face was wracked with guilt, he only turns to leave, but you call out to him.
“please, my love, stay with me, for one final night.” Morpheus doesn’t answer, “please give me one last moment with you.” you beg. Morpheus turns back to you, silent. his eyes, filled with stars, search your face. in one quick moment, your face is in his hands and his lips on your lips. desperation was in every kiss, searing and steaming. you could feel every ounce of guilt and sadness in him. you kissed him back, needing to make him remember you. his hands move to your back, quickly undoing your lace. with in seconds, your clothes were on the floor and your body was in his hands.
by morning, Morpheus had left, leaving only a rose where he had laid next to you. as soon as he was gone, the ache was back. but soon, you learned that you were with child. the ache you had felt was gone, but dread replaced it. fear for your child and fear of the tragedy that Morpheus had warned you about. your handmaiden was sworn to secrecy, fearing your parents’ reaction. but as soon as you found out, your life ends.
you stood at your balcony, one hand on your stomach. your thoughts full of your love.
“hello.” a sultry voice sounds from behind you. you turn and the most beautiful person stands in front of you. their hair black and lips a deep red. they hum, you feel the vibrations in your chest.
you gasp, “you’re like Morpheus!” your eyes widen.
they chuckle, “he told you, hasn’t he.” they start laughing, loud and menacing. “oh, he truly loved you.” you feel fear trickle down your spine. “oh sweetheart… don’t be scared.” they smile, wide and evil. “i’m here to help you with that ‘thing’ in your belly.”
your eyes grow wide and your hand goes back down to your stomach, protective, “what? there- there is no need for that.” they pout.
“oh, but there is.” they flick their wrist and you’re falling. the balcony was built with your safety in mind, this shouldn’t be happening. you scream, but soon, you’re looking down at your mangled corpse. blood flowing from your head and- “my baby…” you feel the wind get knocked out of you. you watch as your parents run to your body, screaming. a hand rests on your shoulder.
“hello, love.” calmness washes over you. you turn to look at the stranger. she felt similar to him, to your Morpheus. “ah, you must be my brother’s lover.” she smiles, warmly.
“i didn’t- i don’t know what to do… i miss him.” tears run down your face. she wipes your face.
“i can help you, but there are great costs.” she looked at you with worry. “once i do this for you, there is no turning back, (y/n). you will never be rid of this curse.”
“i don’t care… please… help me.” you feel the loss of your love, and then your child weighing on your heart. she sighed and nodded, and with a snap of her fingers, you were born again.
you push away his hand from your face. “i need you to leave, Morpheus.” you stand firm, wiping away your useless tears. you’ve survived decades of love and heartbreak, life and death. you will not lose yourself in love again. you will not lose yourself in him.
“you love me, i know it, (y/n).” Morpheus smiles. you grit your teeth.
“i don’t love you.” even you couldn’t believe your half-hearted lie, but you couldn’t risk it. Morpheus’s smile drops. you see the man that left you once more. Morpheus backs away.
“i do not believe you, and when you’re ready to listen to me, i shall find you, my dove.” he turns away, cold.
your stomach drops and fear twists your face, “no, Morpheus. don’t do this, please. please i can’t-” he snaps his finger, and once more, you are born again.
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do you ever just think about the relationship between daniel dream and the corinthian mark ii
like, it's explored a little in nightmare country, which is probably the main draw of that series for me, but i hope we get to see it a lot more by the time the series is done
because like. everything that happened at the cereal convention is a huge defining moment in how these two interact, both of them remember it clearly and how they felt at the time and it was definitely traumatising for at least one of them if not both
and also it happened before either of them were born
the most impactful thing you ever experienced and you weren't even present for it
like. im just fascinated by the idea of how this relationship, for morpheus and mark i, was originally so full of pride and admiration, which got soured by hate and rivalry and disappointment and anger and all the negative emotions that ended in
and both of the new versions remember feeling all of those things, they know exactly why and how their predecessors got to that place
but they weren't there. it wasn't them.
and also - both of the new versions were made, by morpheus, to be better
corinthian to correct all the mistakes he made the first time round, and daniel to be all of the things dream knew he should be, but couldn't, as morpheus
it's another thing they share, that they both have this other person hanging over them, that they each met only briefly, but at the same time, one of them is that person, and the other has known him for over 3000 years
and that person, however they feel about him, wanted the two of them to fix everything that was wrong.
should they? can they? are they better versions of the originals, or different people entirely?
these new versions don't have the same pseudo parent-child relationship the originals had, because daniel didn't create the new corinthian. the new corinthian did in fact look after him as a baby, so they're almost on equal ground. there's no pride, but therefore no hate. does the rivalry even make sense, then? and if that rivalry ended long ago, if the new dream and the new corinthian succeed in working together, is that because of any choice they themselves made, or just choices morpheus made?
and just. the amount of legacy both of them have to fight through when it comes to each other, they're some of the few people in the universe who could understand exactly what the other's been through, if they can ever get past everything bequeathed to them in order to see that
but that legacy is a complicated beast to tackle. and i wonder what that does to both of their senses of identity
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hello!! i loved your maiko Palm Springs au for mai week btw, it was sooo good and very much reminded me of my love for that pair.
I was wondering if you read/have read the sandman comics? alsooo, do you have any personal headcanons about morpheus/calliope, or just thoughts about them? (or any morpheus ships LOL). i love hearing your thoughts about the show because your blogging about it made me want to watch it lol - and I enjoyed them & morpheus/lucienne the most! hope you’re well, take care!! <3
oooooohhhhhhhh my god thank you!!! I'm thrilled you liked the maiko/Palm Springs fic, it was definitely a labor of love lol. It reminded me of how deep and honest mai and zuko's connection is with each other in the show, and how well that translates to Sarah/Nyles's relationship!!
I have not read the sandman comics! I don't really see myself doing so, just because I'm not really a comics person. I've heard good things about them and the snippets of them I've seen are super interesting though!
omg omg omg BLEASE not you saying I got you into the sandman show!!! I'm glad my nonsense inspired you to watch it lmao, it really is so well thought out and so rich!
I have many thoughts on Morpheus/Calliope! I feel like they would have originally bonded over being creative and artistic. I love the idea of them working together to create Dreams and Nightmares. And that they have been able to reconnect after both of their imprisonments as the new people that they are. Dream, especially, has clearly changed so much. Before he was caught, he was very cold, arrogant, and vengeful. He wants to be better now, and Calliope would love to see that side to him. Even if they just end up being friends, I like the idea of them having a strong relationship where they really feel supported by each other.
(Also that Dream is kind of awkward now and Calliope thinks it's VERY CUTE)
and omg I LOVE MORPHEUS/LUCIENNE!!! The endless devotion!!! The unconditional love!!! Lucienne waited for him for a century and was the first person to greet him when he came back!!!! Dream's greatest fear in Hell was that he would disappear and Lucienne would have no idea what happened to him again!!! They really are eternal husband/wife material and I would die on that hill.
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Alright. But Hob accidentally making the New Inn as a temple to Morpheus. All of Moprheus' more loyal but still epically curious Dreams/Nightmares (except for Gilbert) being like 'hey, hey, wait. This is a temple to Lord Morpheus, right? So, technically, this land is part of Lord Morpheus' realm, so technically, if we go to the New Inn... we aren't leaving the Dreaming, so Lord Morpheus can't get mad at us!!'
So, Dreams and Nightmares keep showing up at the Inn, but Hob doesn't know that they're Dreams and Nightmares, he just thinks they're kind of odd regulars. They all become oddly fond and protective of Hob, like 'he's our Lord Morpheus' high priest, no one messes with our hi- we mean, with our Lord's high priest!!'
By the time Dream gets free, the New Inn is the regular haunt of more Dreams/Nightmares than humans, unless one includes Hob's own students, who get discounts there. Dream shows back up at the New Inn, does NOT notice any of his Dreams/Nightmares because he's too busy making heart eyes at Hob and being all 'omg, pls take me back, I fucked up, I am sorry! D: ' without saying even 1% of that.
Dream only notices his Dreams/Nightmares are literally there watching him flirt with Hob when they make out on like the third date, and Hob's students all start whistling/cheering/clapping/etc and Hob is like 'oh no'. Dream turns to look at the other guests and finds himself meeting eyes with one of his own subjects and it's just that scene where Corinthian and Gilbert see each other, only this time it's Dream and a bunch of his own subjects, like suddenly everywhere he looks he finds a familiar pair of eyes and he's like '!!!??!?!?' and they're all like 'hey, boss, technically you own the land, so we're not breaking any rules :) ' and Dream suddenly suffers the mortifying ordeal of being known by his subjects... and Hob, but Hob doesn't count anymore because he worked through his mortification over that one...
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