Stop blaming sex negativity on sex-repulsed aces challenge [impossible]

Hi, I'm Elias, I'm a 26yo trans guy from Denmark. I write shit, I draw shit, and I get into unneccesarily tedious arguments with anons about torture apologia in fiction. I think that sums up my vibe

I've made a few posts about this already, but tl;dr: the Danish NHS has been refusing to treat me for gender dysphoria for the better part of a year now because they've deemed me "unstable." Unstable how, you ask?

I have depression.

No, that is quite literally it. Full context under the readmore.

Fighting to be heard and having the door repeatedly slammed in your face sucks peak ass, and I'm done now. The NHS is so lackluster when it comes to trans people, all of a sudden, it makes perfect sense to me why 31% of transgender Danes get HRT outside of the NHS.

And I'd rather not have to turn to the black market, so rn I'm hoping to get a prescription with GenderGP. The issue is, I'm poor as fuck and can't afford the start-up fees for the forseeable future - unless I do something like this. I hate asking others for money, and I hate it even more if I'm not in a place where I can give anything in return. But I also recognize I'm in over my head with this, so. If you've got a cent or two to spare, I'd be grateful as hell.

I've mathed it out, and my best estimate is that I need around 3500,- DKK / $500 USD. Again, this is just to cover the initial subscription as well as mandatory consultations/blood tests. I should be able to cover the prescriptions on my own, as well as further tests/consultations down the line, so I'm hoping this is a one-and-done sort of thing.

paypal: [email protected]

Also, important note. We're in a global cost of living/housing crisis and this isn't a strict life-or-death situation. If you're in a tough spot right now, don't send me anything, that'd just make me feel worse about asking. I appreciate the thought but you gotta take care of your own needs first. Peace and take care ✌️

So I've been dealing with major depressive disorder since I was 11. It runs in my family, and as you might imagine, after 15 years of living with this thing, I've learned how to manage it pretty well by now. I know what it's like to genuinely be unstable - and if I were in a place like that, no problem, I'd be open about that. I wouldn't be making decisions like this. I know myself. You kind of have to when you're dealing with a chronic mental illness.

Here's where I am right now: I've got no suicidal ideation, been clean from self harm for four years, no psychosis, no inpatient admissions for the last five years. I live on my own, take my meds, and I'm keeping my life in order. Depressed, yes, but about as stable as someone with my history can get, and ask anyone who knows me, me wanting to get on HRT isn't some spur of the moment decision. I've done a fucking decade of soul searching, and a few years ago, I finally (duh) reached the conclusion that living as a woman isn't something I can even fake being content with - believe me, I've tried. I'm well aware of the scope of medical transition, but I'm settled in who I am. And I just want to live like me now. That's the only thing I want.

If it counts for anything, my partner and family have supported me through this, which has been priceless obviously, but it also goes to show that me saying "I'm capable of making medical decisions" isn't purely a personal assessment. I'm pretty sure they'd speak up if they thought I was being unstable about it or whatever

But the CPH clinic for sexology, who have consistently refused to listen to me telling them all this, have somehow magically aquired divine knowledge on my capacity to make adult decisions about my own body, and on the basis that I have MDD, they're refusing to even set me up for a preliminary interview - one that would preceed a 6 month full-team psych evaluation before the prospect of HRT would even come up. They said in their latest refusal that they wont accept another referral from me until a year after my last in-clinic conversation with them, which happened on October 24th, 2023 - meaning that with the NHS, if they accepted my referral come October (which I don't have much faith they will), the earliest I could possibly get on HRT is April 2025. Arguing for my own sanity would've sucked enough as is, but it's made harder by the fact that they won't even talk to me. You're a trans guy who would like healthcare, but you have a mental illness? Good luck, you're on your own. Long live the Danish bureaucracy.

Dysphoria makes me fucking miserable. I'd rather not have to write a sob story here, and tumblr is like 80% trans people so I guess a good portion of you can imagine why waiting another year for the possibility of maybe-perhaps-if-all-goes-well getting on HRT would not actually make me less miserable about it.

So. I'm sitting down next week along with my mom to file a formal complaint with the patient's rights committee. I don't know what to call this other than some form of discrimination on the basis of mental illness, because nothing in my current situation would prohibit me from making medical decisions for myself. And I honestly don't think that a complaint is going to do much, but I intend to make it obnoxiously long, because by law, a specialized doctor and an attorney have to read through the whole thing. If you can't beat 'em, make 'em read 50 pages of you going into detail about why you think they suck, right

And yeah, like I said, in the meantime, I'm trying to go via GenderGP. It'd be nice if my poor ass could get HRT via the NHS instead of having to pay out of pocket, but apparently the bar for entry requires that you 1) have gender dysphoria to the point where it impedes normal function and 2) somehow aren't mentally ill. Who wrote these rules? Some 60yo cis guy in a suit in Christiansborg, I imagine.

Feel free ask about anything relating to this whole situation, I'll be as open as I can about it, cause I understand that if you're going to give money to someone, you want to know what it's going to. Though I hope you understand I'm not going to doxx myself more than I already have now, or give you my entire medical history - only what's relevant to my current situation.

I know Denmark is a welfare state and on a global scale we're doing alright, but I hope you don't mind if I say this: This shouldn't be happening as often as it does. Fuck the Danish NHS.

Clothing has No Gender (BTS Imagine)

BTS with their boyfriend when he has a particularly dysphoric day about his clothes (ot7)

Tags: BTS x transmasc reader, wholesome

Warnings: Talk of dysphoria, mentions of transphobia

Suggested by anonymous <3

Sorry for the short break, I'm working on a longer more detailed story right now rather than churning these imagines out, but I really wanted to do this one. Let me know if you'd be interested in more trans reader stories in the future, maybe solo members and more in depth? If i got some things wrong I apologize, I myself am not familiar with the trans experience so I am willing to learn from those who do experience dysphoria, all I ask for is your patience as I am still learning! <3

Namjoon

Namjoon would take you out shopping to find some clothes that would make you feel better. He would point out outfits and accessories that he thinks would look good on you, making sure to point out features on you that he loves and using masculine descriptive words such as "handsome," "dashing" and "fly." He makes sure to subtly use more gendered language when talking with you to make you feel affirmed and he makes sure you feel comfortable. He picks out clothes for both of you, and loves the idea of matching suits and clothes.

"I feel like this would accentuate your jawline and really bring out your eyes. What do you think? I think you'd look really handsome."

Jin

Jin would ask you if you'd rather have a stay in day or go out, depending on if you are comfortable enough. Either way, he loves to dress in clothing that is generalized as more feminine and bright, so he would dress in clothes that are cute. pink and colorful to help you with your confidence. He would remind you that while clothing has no gender, the person wearing them defines them. He would cook food for you and remind you how grateful he is to have such a handsome boyfriend.

"If you're wearing them, then they're boy's clothes. Now get over here and enjoy this food I made just for my handsome man."

Yoongi

Yoongi would sit down and listen to you, asking questions here and there about your feelings and specifically help you figure out why you think some ways and help you realize how your brain makes you feel like that. He would try to understand from your point of view, and based on your information he would do his best to accommodate to make you feel better. You two would have a lazy day of healing and watch movies and order takeout, wear comfier clothes and cuddle. He would reassure you that he sees you as a man and that he loves you, no matter how your brain tries to tell you otherwise. He may not understand why you feel so dysphoric because he honestly sees you as his perfect boyfriend and has a difficult time imagining you any differently, but he is there for you as a form of comfort and a listening ear.

"I don't see you that way. I see you as the man you are, stronger than most because of what you've gone through, no questions asked. Here, come sit with me and help warm me up, we can watch movies. Are you comfortable?"

Hoseok

Hobi would definitely want to make you feel loved. He would compliment your outfit and tell you how handsome you look in your clothes, how it doesn't matter what haters say or think and how he loves you as the man you are. He would emphasize parts of your personality and mannerisms that he loves and he would get you off your feet and try to cheer you up by dancing and being silly. He gives the absolute best comfort hugs and you can't help but feel a little better after seeing his bright smile.

"Awww, my cutie boy, come dance with me! I want to see your handsome smile!"

Jimin

Jimin would have trouble understanding where you are coming from, since his view on gender is very grey and he himself likes to play with gender and representation in clothing, however he would do his best in making you feel more comfortable. Jimin's confidence in himself and his gender while presenting more feminine and wearing gender neutral clothes in general makes you more confident in yourself, as well as the way he looks up to you and admires you. He is clingy and subby, making you feel warm inside knowing that he relies on you and sees you as protection, which in a way, helps you with your dysphoria. Overall, he adores you and you find him adorable, enough to distract your thoughts.

"Y/N, what do you think, does this color suit me? I want to look pretty for my man."

Taehyung

Tae tries his best to distract you, keeping you busy by taking you out on a drive with him. He lets you choose your favorite music that he knows all the words to also so you can sing together as you drive, and the two of you talk about how you feel a bit. He doesn't say things to help 'convince' you of your masculinity but rather showers you in compliments that directly battle your insecurities, making you feel a little bit better. He would stop by a cafe and go inside to order your drink for you, then drive you both home where he would offer you to go through his closet and try on anything you like. He has no issues at all sharing clothes, in fact, he thinks its cute when you wear his things, calling you "handsome" and telling you it suits you more than him.

"I'll have a hot chocolate, and he will have a chai latte please. Ah, careful Y/N, don't get it on your suit, it looks so good on you without any stains!"

Jungkook

Jungkook cocks his head in slight confusion whenever you talk about your insecurities and dysphoria to him, simply because he forgets all the time that you are trans. He simply sees you as you, his amazing boyfriend, and treats you the same as any other man he is close to, except for the fact that he loves you. He compliments your build all the time, loving going to workout together and build up your body confidence. Anytime you ask him with teary eyes if you look like a girl, he looks at you with his famous confused face, telling you he simply cannot even imagine you as anything other than what you truly are. He gives amazing comforting hugs.

"Huh? Y/N, I'm at a loss here. I'm looking, and no matter what, all I see is my fantastic, handsome boyfriend. I wish you could see yourself through my eyes. *sigh* My baby boy is too hard on himself."

Send me suggestions on what to write next! ~ <3

--Masterlist--

On a related note to that proship Wikipedia page, there's actually a hilarious instance of a radqueer *giving a college speech about the radqueer community and recording it online* lol. Moons above, some people are just so terminally online lol. Bonus points for the fact that the speech doesn't even make sense unless you're intensely following discourse around radqueers, much less even know what they are.

www.archive.org/details/VriskerFic8onRadqueerSpeech

Listening to it and just. jesus christ what am I even hearing. "Transableism isn't ableist because being disabled isn't a bad thing and wanting to be disabled isn't bad" imagine being a college prof and hearing that.

(More inane ramblings below the cut + live reactions)

Not to also mention it just baffles me the idea of, say for example, neurotypicals identifying as "transautistic" because they feel like they are autistic. You can't be serious with me right now. You cannot look me in the eyes and tell me that you are oppressed because you identify as disabled despite being able-bodied. I get it somewhat if it's a OSDD/DID thing and you've got alters and whatnot, but it's just asinine. It's beyond terminally online. The second hand embarrassment from seeing that this was handed in as a project is so intense. You'd have to be toiling in the darkest, deepest parts of the internet to even understand this.

"It can't be offensive because most of us are minorities" ??? WHAT EVEN IS THAT LOGIC??? Like can you apply that logic to fandom racism? Like imagine people calling somebody out for racism and they went "erm I polled my followers and most of them were queer minorities so it's not offensive" are you kidding me.

Oh my fucking god of course they're a Vriska kinnie. The way they're describing being "transcharacter" makes me nauseous like... Okay, fine, I understand kinning characters. This stuff here sounds like a cult or signs of some sort of dissociative disorder. My sibling in science you need help if you genuinely feel like harming yourself over not being a fictional character.

"I'm trans-half-blind" be serious with me rn. Be fr. Be honest with me here

I do very much agree that harassment and doxing is utterly vile and I feel for these people and how they've been affected, but I don't think suffering immediately makes their identity any more valid. You can't just be. transdisabled. You are either able-bodied and wearing an eyepatch for fun or you're actually disabled.

The thing with these transdisabled people is that they never identify with "gross" disabilities either. Where's the transdisabled people who want feeding tubes. Where's the transdisabled people who claim that they've got dysphoria because they don't have a oxygen tank. What about the disabilities that aren't easy to make you look cool and edgy? Don't got dysphoria for that now, huh?

God I hate fakeclaiming people with mental disorders but I also think that you gotta have at least something with you in order to feel dysphoria about not being a system or not having autism.

Again imagine being a normal well-adjusted person who (at most) has a Snapchat and Instagram account and hearing this. They just talk about this stuff like you're already aware of it. Goodness gracious. The thing here too is that I'd be terrified of giving them a bad mark for being, well, incomprehensible in case they decided to take that as me being a violent bigot and further harm themselves.

What are they even talking about right now

Why are they talking about the Oxford dictionary

"This calls us attention seekers. Well, don't you know that attention seeking is a sign of emotional neglect?" you didn't debunk the argument. You just said: "Well, yeah, maybe we are attention seekers, but don't you know we're also traumatized? Boom, gotcha there. Now you can't criticize us because we're traumatized"

OH MY GOD THEY ACTUALLY WEAR AN EYEPATCH WDHUAIWHAIUA--

Oh how brilliant of a conclusion: people are people and not everyone's emotions and experiences are the same. How ground-breaking. Curious, I wonder what it would be like to ask a person who has a missing or damaged eye their thoughts and opinions on a transcharacter Viriska wearing an eyepatch and telling people they're disabled. I wonder how they'd feel.

God this whole thing is so immature. They call anybody who disagrees with them a child when they themselves have been doing little more than make cheap arguments, curse, and barely formulate even a single coherent thesis statement. It doesn't even sound like they have a script, more like ramblings straight from the heart.

Kid, I don't really care if a person is transID or whatever it's called. I care if they're a decent person more than anything. I'm not going to maul them and drag them into the streets for people to stone to death. Why do you act like you're oppressed in this way? I get that you and your friends have been mistreated, but to be honest it's still like. ridiculous to me.

Please don't...gouge your eye out...

I know I've said it before but GOD imagine being a prof and receiving this. I would be utterly terrified and don't know what to do because it's clear the person is not exactly in. stable condition mentally.

sexuality/gender headcanons about the sherlock gang

18+ (not really nsfw) content under the cut ♡

post author is bi & nonbinary! these are just my own personal hcs that i keep in mind when i write fic, it's 100% fine if you don't agree c:

sherlock holmes

homosexual, grey-aromantic transmasculine.

sherlock, despite public perceptions, has an absolutely average sex drive, but had never really felt romantic attraction in his life until he met john, and he can't imagine falling in love with anyone else. he spent a fair bit of time on hookup apps prior to meeting john. sherlock is KINKY.

he's known he felt more aligned with masculinity since he was very small, but never felt the need to go on hormones or have surgery, because he finds society's expectations of trans people restrictive and doesn't want surgical recovery to slow him down. he binds (sometimes unsafely, much to john's annoyance), and it does wonders for his dysphoria.

john watson

allo, bi cis man.

dating sherlock from the great game until the fall, and after mary's death. john's romantic attraction STRONGLY leans towards women and femmes, but sherlock is The One for him. he had a purely physical relationship with sholto when he was still in the army.

john's sex drive is actually super high.

mycroft holmes

allo, gay cis man

a lot of people assume mycroft is aro/ace, because he never seems to get himself involved with anyone. mycroft is married to his work, in the truest sense of the word, and simply doesn't have time for sex or relationships.

mycroft is in a bonded pair with his right hand.

greg lestrade

allo, straight cis man. (token cishet white man!)

dating molly, unofficially just after aSiB, officially asked her out in tSoT, when they were tipsy at john & mary's wedding. greg is super comfortable with his sexuality/masculinity and he's experimented plenty. before john & sherlock got together, he kissed john in the pub once, just to see if he'd like it. he had a fling with a bloke in police academy when he was young, but decided in the end that dudes weren't for him. he appreciates beauty in all genders, and isn't afraid to point out an aesthetically pleasing man. he's also VERY much an ally, most of his friends (and his girlfriend,, uwu) are queer. he fiercly protects his queer friends and coworkers.

greg is an absolute HORNDOG. filthy filthy filthy. he'd be doin' it every day if it was up to him. he's a pleasure/service dom and

molly hooper

demisexual, bi, cis woman.

dating greg. is pretty much split 50/50 in her attraction, maybe with a slight lean towards men. even though she's shy, her sexuality is one of the few things she's open and proud about.

mary morstan

haven't really thought about it much, but if there was a gun to my head, i'd say shes a bi cis woman?

mary doesn't like to label anything about herself, much less her sexuality. she goes with the flow.

(i don't think about her much bc i don't like her, also amanda abbington is an unspeakable terf)

irene adler

allo, lesbian cis woman.

irene didn't come out until her late 20s, struggled with A LOT of comphet, explaining what she thought was an "attraction" to sherlock. they're seriously just bros now, though.

irene actually couldnt really care less one way or another about how often she has sex, but she knows she's good at it and can use it to make money.

sally donovan

allo, bi trans woman

sally is t4t, and dating anderson. she lives stealth, almost nobody knows other than

philip anderson

allo, straight trans man

dating sally. anderson is quite insecure in his trans identity and used to be truscum, explaining the animosity between him and sherlock. he blamed himself a lot after the fall, and took a long hard look at himself and his politics, helped along by a kick up the arse from sally.

More ramblings re: the Dexter Friends Extended Universe

word vomit below the cut, cw: depression and dysphoria mentions, also weed mention but very briefly Mainly to do with Mandark, Surfer Boy, Dee Dee and her friends

So in this universe, which I would say is pretty much my own bubble universe and nothing I would expect as canon, especially since the Powerpuff girls are just There, I've been thinking about how the timeline goes. One of the themes I'm interested in is the idea that people can change and evolve, especially from childhood, and Dexter learning slowly to make his thinking less black-and-white. (He has a real problem in the show thinking in binaries/opposites like "girl things" vs "boy things" and good vs evil even in situations where it doesn't really apply. Very typical kid thing to do and, doubly so with the heavy autism-coding let's be real. Anyways, my bubble universe subscribes to the Trans Mandark theory because we love Applicability in Storytelling, even if accidental. I'm now currently debating when Mandark and Taylor met back up, because Mandark pretty understandably avoided the beach through puberty bc it's a dysphoria nightmare, but I don't think he'd be very comfortable explaining that to people.

So I'd imagine Mandark avoided him, not knowing how to handle stuff and feeling deeply embarrassed and awkward, and the fact they go to different schools would make this easier. I'm debating whether they stay in contact via text/skype as was the style at the time, I'm thinking yes, but Mandark does not want to meet up in person because he has horrendous self-esteem at this point, you know - being 15 and all that - and doesn't want to be perceived by this very cool person that gives him confusing feelings. Taylor remains kind of hung up on this boy that gave *him* funny feelings and Marie teases him about his 'imaginary boyfriend' they've never met.

I am thinking Goo's parents and Mandark's parents probably are aquaintences because they seem to be part of the same very hippy-dippy crowd (Goo's parents being less intense and giving her more actual free expression, but not realizing she's lonely), so she probably knows Mandark through that and likely getting put in a Gifted Class or two together in High School. (It's the 2000's so I can't imagine Goo gets diagnosed as ND even though she clearly is, lmao) Dee Dee would also probably be friends with Nazz as Popular girls who Do Sports, but like - casual friends. They don't necessarily hang out in the same group all the time but will be the connector piece for several smaller groups to hang out together and go to parties. Dee Dee's besties in highschool are Goo and Bubbles who are extremely like... colourful and energetic and Nazz has Alt Girl stoner vibes (since childhood, irrespective of actual weed being involved) so they're quite different but have this mutual respect, you know? So Nazz's main group is Taylor and Marie (maybe I will think of others), and both her and Dee Dee also can command a crowd of others for parties etc with their popularity. So, if Dee Dee is having a RAWR XD scene girl party, Goo asks if she can bring her friend from her AP classes, Dee says sure and it ends up being mandark in the middle of his Emo phase - he gets extremely embarrassed over his past behavior and spends the night hiding from Dee Dee who is oblivious to all this. Nazz turns up with her skater crew and, in his efforts to hide from Dee Dee, Mandark walks straight into Taylor who is HYPED to see him. Eventually, Mandark and Dee Dee mend fences and strike up a tentative friendship through Goo, but Dee Dee is at first still pretty sus about him, and in fairness she has every right to be. Dexter also still sees Mandark as his arch-nemesis despite this kid getting hit with depression like a ton of bricks. But he has an 'evil aesthetic' according to Dexter so he must be plotting something dark. This actually spurs Dee Dee to befriend him more because she hates Dexter telling her what to do, and they bond over their terrible, terrible poetry. Bubbles probably becomes closest to him because she's a sucker for taking in wounded animals and he has wet cat energy, that and their music tastes overlap a wild amount. (Bubbles is a huge System of a Down fan) - Bubbles also feels like she can let out her Dark Side around this emo friend of hers, in a way her sisters would usually laugh at, and Dee Dee and Goo don't always know how to relate to. Like yeah Dee and Goo feel sad and angry sometimes, but Bubbles has this real issue since she was little of no one taking her seriously, and treating her like a little insipid baby, and it ties into how Mandark's parents treat him.

Heterosexual women seem to have a lot of fear and insecurity surrounding our attraction. Nowhere else is this clearer than in modern fandom spaces where adult men are headcanoned as trans. And weirdly I'm now seeing a lot of calling these men 'babygirl' as some sort of term of endearment (using language to obfuscate their sex whilst not explicitly labelling them as trans)?

It's plain that there is an attempt, using language specifically, to detach from the reality of their actual maleness (the canon misogyny and sexual assaults, for example) - let alone the actual maleness of the real human actors who play, write and direct them.

This is aggravating on a personal level but also political. These characters are often created a specific way for a reason. I'm reminded of this video: 'The Simpsons and The Death Of Parody', where it's discussed that Homer originated as a subversion of the classic sitcom father and parody of the real American father. But now, anytime Homer is lazy, greedy etc. he's that way because he's Homer. The character subsumes the parody. And when you take characters that are male, that are deliberately male, that are shitty and violent in ways that men are in our society, and try to obfuscate their maleness, you're blatantly disregarding the point of the show and the genius of the writing.

But hell, that's always going to be an issue with fandom spaces. As someone who enjoys writing ridiculous fic about awful male characters for my own personal enjoyment, I don't mind in theory taking a terrible character and playing with them as if they're a marionette. Being a female person and consuming fiction openly hostile to you is bad enough as it is, and fanfiction is a way for women and girls to take the power back, to make fiction ours again.

I guess the problem is that as someone is transing their male blorbo, it makes that little game uncomfortably transparent. Like you're seeing how the sausage is made. You can't kid yourself anymore that this is fun self-indulgence; no, this is explicitly about the author's existential terror around her attraction to men. And that's not fun (or helpful to anyone, no matter how 'therapeutic' it might feel to read)!! I don't want to read about a canonically male character exhibiting gender dysphoria, especially when that male character is canonically a misogynist, a stalker, a rapist. I don't want to read ao3 tags that are like 'this character says misogynistic things but he's closeted so it's internalised misogyny really'.

I don't know how long this kind of thing has been going on, but I remember yaoi had a similar problem without the gender language to descibe it. The whole seme/uke dynamic is transparently traditional male/female relations explored in a context where both of the people are men, where you can eroticise your own suffering but also imagine that there's a possibility of real recovery on account of the fact that the 'submissive' person is male and therefore ultimately deserves love.

And that's just the problem, isn't it? These fandom spaces walk a real tightrope on the subject of female oppression. On the one hand there's the desire to be fully and authentically attracted to men, but then there's the discomfort with who men really are. The modern solution has largely become to completely ignore the man in the context of real male-female relations in order to imagine a levelling of the playing field - but with the concept of gender, you can take it a step further by imagining that there is some sort of human in there despite the fact that he's a man. Or in some cases you can just straight up make him female and say he's a transman, at which point he becomes a blatant self-insert and can also have all the depth that women actually have, the depth you want him to have.

Would you be willing to write general hcs for the Arcana main 6 with a trans (ftm) mc? (If you’re comfortable doing it of course)

omg yass i already made one on instagram so i'll repost it here

The Main 6 with a Transgender(FTM) MC

Asra

When they tell him he tears up and tells you that they'll always be by your side no matter what

They have been with MC through so many changes that always make their relationship stronger

He does everything in his power to support them

They're very eager to do whatever makes them more comfortable

They do a spell to make them grow a beard but it ends up being super long like a wizard beard and they both have a huge giggle fit

MC often finds them admiring their body on their gender euphoric days, he can't get his mind off how much they're glowing when they're being their truest self

On bad dysphoria days, they bring them tea and a space to vent about their dysphoria and they're a very good listener and an even better comforter(? a person who is good at comforting others, not the blanket XD)

They call them handsome so he can see them get flustered

Nadia

When they tell her, she lets out a sigh of relief and gives them a soft smile

"Oh dear, that's all you had to tell me? I thought it was something bad!"

She scoops them up into a big hug and mumbles something in their ear about how she's gonna have to update their status to 'Count'

She is extremely supportive their whole transition

Navigating a new gender is very hard and she'll be behind them every step of the way whether it's trying new hair/clothing styles

She'll often whisper in their ear about how handsome they are when they're out in public and she can tell they're uncomfortable

And if they want to, she gets custom tuxedos for them that match her gowns

Julian

When they tell him he gets very excited for them

"MC that's incredible!"

He gives them an all access pass to his wardrobe (as if they didn't have all access before)

MC is wearing something masculine and they're just radiating gender euphoria and you can see Julian blushing because omfg his partner is hot

"Wow Mc! Have your muscles been getting bigger?" *wiggles his brows*

On bad dysphoria days he's there by their side the whole time

He says that he can't even begin to imagine the pain they're going through but no matter what their brain is telling them, they're always going to be a man/their identity

He's so supportive, he won't try to bud in too much during their transition but if they were ask for assistance he's going above and beyond

He tells them how much they love them and how beautiful it's been watching them grow into themselves before they go to sleep

Muriel

When they sit him down to tell him he was really nervous that something bad and happened

And when they come out to him he's like "Oh, that's it? Cool." and goes on with his day

"Wait, you're not mad?"

"Mad about what?"

He's very easy going and supportive about it

He's a really good listener so they can rant to him about dysphoria and he's there listening intently

He crafts them wooden packers

When they're having a good gender euphoric day you can see him watching them with a small smile on his face

Self insert here but doing manual labor and woking with my hands makes me very gender euphoric so he would let him help with that

He remembers the date of every big mile stones for them and will celebrate them with MC

He even has a calendar written with all the dates

Portia

When they tell her she gets so happy she's like "Awe MC!" and gives them the biggest hug and kiss

Portia after not being able to find MC all day: Anyone seen my man?

When they wear wear more masculine clothes for the first time she will literally tear up (in joy) "MC YOU LOOK SO GOOD :.)"

If they're ever having dysphoria she's very comforting to be around but she'd also be like "You're literally the hottest guy around"

She's so good at communicating what might trigger their dysphoria and she will make them as comfortable as possible around her

She loves them so much and loves watching them grow into their skin more and more her heart flutters when she sees them

Ok but Portia being a short queen can help make MC's with height dysphoria euphoric when they're taller than her

Lucio

When MC told him that they were trans he was first surprised but then pulls MC into his arms

He tells MC that he loves them no matter what and there is two handsome men in town now

He'll try and show off to them by giving them lavish gifts like stinky colognes and reflective suit jackets

Will brag to other people about his hot boyfriend

When they're feeling gender euphoric the two step out as this radiant power couple, oozing with confidence

Lucio would also get like weirdly competitive on who can be the better boyfriend

They are often racing to see how can hold the door open for the other, who gives their jacket when it's cold out, etc

If you'll allow me to reply: "No one as far as I know says it’s okay to use puberty blockers on children". I'm sorry, but this is not true, at least if we agree that people between the age of 10 and 16 are still children: here are several links to gender clinics websites which describe how puberty blockers are used and why they are a viable option. You are thinking of cross-sex hormones, which (in the UK afaik) are available at 16 years old. The information given in those three links is standard, in that it describes puberty blockers's effects as "fully reversible". However, we know now that this is not true, or at least, the research on this field is not sufficient to claim it. The NHS in the UK had to take the "fully reversible" mention out from their own website. Have you read about the case of Keira Bell, who successfully sued the NHS, and described how she was essentially rushed through the process of transitioning, encouraged by the homophobia within her own family that was barely questioned by her therapists? Do you not think it is cause for caution? This woman, who overviewed the treatment of children at GIDS, did, and she won her case in court. This BBC report details a little more what exactly went down that caused alarms to be raised in the first place.

I'll stop there, but i'll just add that the porn twitter at Rowling was well and truly a thing. I'm not a fan of "receipt" compilations in either direction, because i think it's easy for anyone to write anything online, but i personally saw at least one person posting a picture of themself with their dick out (sorry) on one of the threads in question. Obviously i'm aware i'm just one person online and you don't have any reason to trust me. We do have the receipts for all the rape threats / death threats though, and i'm not sure what JKR has *done* that convinces you that she'd be lying on this (as opposed to a neutral "i haven't seen it so might be true, might not be").

I'll allow the reply of course, but I still don't think any of this makes a convincing argument, in the sense that:

I checked two out of three links because one sends me to a website that my antivirus says has phishing going on so I don't think I'll take it as a trusted source. the last one says nothing against the side-effects - it says they're safe overall but we can't know if there are any side effects until the people taking them now get older which is like.. same as any med in existence and other than that it says nothing that would make me think a blocker or whatever it is isn't a safer option for trans teenagers than risking self-harm or suicide, the other link listed some possible side effects which might not be a thing for everyone and like... I mean, again, if I was a trans teenager and felt suicidal because of dysphoria and they told me 'okay you can take them and feel better but this this and that might happen or you can stay as it is' I'd probably chance the blockers anyway, and maybe they're not fully reversible but I'd wager that if you know you're not a cisgender person you'd chance that anyway;

10-16 is teenagers, not children. I mean, I'll say a 15yo is a child if I'm talking about 'don't put teenagers in charge of an army' or 'don't make teenagers take life or death decisions' or 'don't put heavy responsibility on teenagers' because a 15yo shouldn't be in charge of, say, taking their single parent off life support if they have no other family and the parent ends up in an accident, but if we're discussing this stuff children are not teenagers and when saying 'think of the children' people immediately think of actual *children* not teens, and again no one gives puberty blockers nor performs surgeries on people younger than that UNLESS as someone else pointed out in my replies it's cis kids starting puberty at like NINE and they're given blockers because it's too early and honestly as someone who got her period at twelve I could have used waiting two more years myself, I can't imagine someone who gets it at nine, so if even cis kids use them for a couple years when their doctor thinks it's the case... I mean the point is still moot, they're meds like any other and they can have side effects like any other, it depends on whether your doctor sucks or not;

like, momentarily OT but at some point in my life I had a crap doctor who at some point had decided to prescribe me some pills that diabetics usually take because according to him I didn't process sugar in my blood well enough or something and I took them and I lost 5kgs in three weeks because that shit made me nauseous, I kept on feeling sick, I lost my appetite, the problem I had didn't get better and then when I stopped them along with other pills that dude gave me the result was that I didn't get my period for three months and it was miserable, I gained some 10 extra kgs I wasn't able to lose for years and it was 90% because I took that stuff, am I going around saying that people should watch their diabetes medication because it fucked with me? no, because I shouldn't have been taking them and my doctor was shit but it wasn't the fault of the meds, I'm 100% sure they were helpful to others that actually needed them and weren't wrongly prescribed them and maybe for them the side-effects weren't as bad as they were for me, same concept;

which brings us to: how she was essentially rushed through the process of transitioning, encouraged by the homophobia within her own family that was barely questioned by her therapists? it's extremely unfortunate that it was the case, but... that's because she had shit therapists and a homophobic family, because if that wasn't the case then it wouldn't have happened and the problem isn't that puberty blockers exist or that trans teens take them, it's that you need better doctors and people should be educated to not be homophobic, and that's valid also for trans kids who know they are and can't get help/resources until they're 18 because their families are homophobic, so I don't see how one case like this is a reason to be concerned about the practice at large;

the case you discussed... what I'm reading is that one doctor was too liberal with giving out those blockers which by the way as the other person pointed out were thought of also to be given to kids as young as ten and not just because of gender dysphoria, the one that sued raised concerns that weren't taken seriously and she sued and won because they should have handled the matter differently but how is that, again, supposed to be a reason why I should be concerned about it at large if we're still talking about single doctors and single cases? it's always like that, it's not each single kid or a large majority of the kids who ever took a puberty blocker had issues, which would be what would make it concerning, and again... you solve that problem by not having shit doctors - which sadly happens - and making sure it's triple checked before prescribing medications and that the families don't suck, which isn't something that's going to happen if people keep on saying the trans agenda is ruining our children or that there's a trans cult etc because it's not an agenda nor a cult, it's real people who have rights to exist and honestly, like.... I'm a cis woman so whatever, but I had a D cup at thirteen. if I had been a trans guy and I had known from before would I have rather gone through those side effects of the meds and not having developed a D cup or let it happen and then sweat cold at the idea of having top surgery taking out that much breast? because I think I'd have rather chanced the meds;

then: but i'll just add that the porn twitter at Rowling was well and truly a thing okay, but was it when children were present to see it? because that's the concerning thing in case AND again, twitter shouldn't be used by people under the age of 13, so like if rowling was talking to children under 13 on twitter knowing it it was breaking the website's rules. and if someone sent her porn... that's inappropriate but I'm 100% sure that any celebrity in existence with a social media gets sent that at some point, which is why they hire people to look at their replies, so the point is, did children see that porn and was she anyway agreeing with having children on a platform that by its own TOS should not be used by anyone under the age of 13 anyway? because like... let's say that I am babysitting a bunch of kids under the age of 13 and I bring them to idk some open cinema thing where I don't know what they're gonna air but we'll just sit and find out and I'm stupid and I make them see Watchmen: if the kids get traumatized, whose fault is that? mine for bringing them somewhere they could engage with content not aimed at them. so if rowling is like 'MAKE YOUR KIDS SHOW UP ON TWITTER TO SEND ME DRAWINGS' she's automatically putting them in danger to be shown stuff they shouldn't see bc twitter is not aimed at her readership, dot. so honestly I don't have much sympathy for her even if it was true that children saw it, which I still didn't see any receipt of - wrt porn being sent at her, as stated I don't think a single celebrity on earth hasn't been sent either porn or thirst stuff, so like... honestly if I made the money she did I'd pay someone to report that shit and be done with it;

finally, We do have the receipts for all the rape threats / death threats though, and i'm not sure what JKR has *done* that convinces you that she'd be lying on this (as opposed to a neutral "i haven't seen it so might be true, might not be"). I never said she lied about getting death threats - I'm saying she lied about children being subjected to trans activism related porn (and the guy with the dick out could have been any idiot not necessarily a trans-related person). I'm sure she got them - I mean, I'm no one in comparison to rowling, I only ever wrote fanfic and I have once received 600 message in one hour telling me to kill myself and I have a museum of receipts of people saying I should die or I should have been raped or aborted and it was just from being on tumblr posting fanfic and shooting the shit for ten years, I don't doubt that she got death or rape threats online and I agree that she shouldn't have gotten them nor that it's any way to engage with people you disagree with - I want people to stop sharing her content and giving her money, not to wish her to get raped or killed. however, the point is that jkr will get those threats and can hire a social media manager to get rid of them, or live in the knowledge that even if some rando on twitter does it it will never physically harm her because she lives in a damned castle and can pay lawyers for an eternity to sue those people if she likes, and it's extremely unlikely that any of those randos can actually harm her. meanwhile, the fact that she finances terfs/hate movements/gives them a voice and so on actually harms trans people because those ppl fight for more restrictive legislation when in the UK it's already bad off - again FOUR YEARS for a psychology referral after you turn 18 means four years of untreated gender dysphoria and I don't think gender criticals realize what the fuck that means and that's just the first thing that comes to mind. the trans ppl jkr's views harm actually risk dying because they aren't given those resources in a timely fashion and aren't given treatment on the spot but are actually on long-ass waiting lines if they can't afford to pay in cash, and sorry to say but most times trans people don't make the money jkr does. with all the money jkr has, she could pay off reassignment surgery for most likely all of the uk's trans people on a waiting list and she'd have extra for another twenty reincarnations. like, idk how to say it anymore but jkr isn't a rando. jkr is the most famous writer alive and googling online how much money she owns it says £820 million. I don't even know what the fuck I'd do with £820 million, because I could live easily with 1 million pounds probably, but the point is that in comparison to any rando and any trans activist, jkr is in a winning position because she's rich, she's virtually untouchable and literally no one is going to harm her and her harmful views will only get her online scorn but no one is gonna stop buying her books, and even if they did she'd still have enough money to survive comfortably until she dies and then I'm pretty sure her family could live comfortably for the next five centuries. the trans people terfism hurts meanwhile could literally be dying because the NHS doesn't process their waiting lists fast enough and she's contributing to that because she supports people who don't care about trans ppl nor want them to have those rights at all;

like anything we could point out wrt what jkr has on her side in this debate doesn't hold up when the point is that she's sitting on 820 million pounds and other ppl might die because - I googled - gender reassignment surgery in the UK costs out of pocket from what the internet says £19,236 per patient, including support as well as surgery. 20k pounds is not cents. and since I'm not that shit at math yet, let's just do a small calculation. let's round out and say with 20k pounds I pay off surgery for one single trans adult in the uk. if I divide jkr's money total by 20k, I get 41k, which means that she could pay off surgery for 41k trans people. I now went on the NHS website after googling 'how many trans people there are in the uk' knowing I'd get most likely a wrong number, and: In 2018/19 around 8,000 people were referred to adult gender dysphoria services in England. 8k people in the whole of england in two years if all of them pays 20k surgery is 160 million pounds, which means that jkr could have paid off all of their surgeries and still have 660 million pounds left which is way more than anyone needs to live comfortably, and instead part of that money goes to terf organizations.... which by the way promote ideologies that also go against the interests of cis women too and, again, any other woman that's not a terf.

I think it's a no brainer. sorry but I'm sure that donald trump also gets a lot of hate mail, or that marine lepen does to stick with women, or that marjorie green whoeverthefuckishername does, and guess what, I wouldn't give a fuck if someone sends hate mail to a woman who says that school shooting massacres are a plot of the left and that 15yo kids gunned down while in class basically asked for it because that's vile and she's in the US senate and gets paid by tax payers and says this shit, so while I'm sympathetic on a human level to getting death threats/rape threats as I got them myself, I have more sympathy for people who actually risk dying and don't most times have the money to pay their way out of it rather than someone who sits on 820 billion pounds and finances people who don't believe trans people have human rights/deserve to get free treatment/to be recognized for what they are and not for what their birth certificate says.

also, everything I said but just said better is in this video here

which I would recommend to anyone who has an hour or so of time who wants a nuanced and good discussion on this take that actually takes jkr's points into more consideration than I'd have given her.