#legit thought of this around 8:30 and started writing it around 10
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an introvert's guide to falling in love on thanksgiving
derek x stiles, g, fluff, thanksgiving, 1.6k
for @nerdy-stilinski ... just barely getting this up in time haha
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It’s not that Derek doesn’t like being charitable; it’s that Derek doesn’t like people. What he does like is cooking, which is why, every Thanksgiving morning since high school, he’s found a reason to make himself useful in the kitchen and just …. not leave.
All day.
Slowly, throughout college and grad school, he was put in charge of more and more of the meal, until the only thing he wasn’t responsible for was the appetizers his mother set out early and kept refreshing throughout the day. He has his timeline down to a science at this point, though the menu has evolved over the years to keep up with the guests his mother invites and the new additions always necessitate some last-minute juggling. He starts with the soups a full week in advance; butternut squash and split pea, made in huge proportions and kept frozen until the night before. Same with the gravy, though he’ll add in drippings for extra flavor just before it’s served. He preps the casseroles the day before and lets them sit until the morning, bakes at least half a dozen pies, and usually goes to bed the night before already exhausted for what’s to come.
But as tiring as it all is, he’ll gladly do it when the alternative is mixing with a bunch of college students he doesn’t know, all of whom don’t have another place to go for the holidays. The kitchen, at least, is his refuge.
A refuge that’s invaded far too quickly the next morning.
He hears the humming first; he’s been able to tune out most of the conversations since he was a teenager, though the more repetitive and annoying noises tend to break through occasionally. And while the humming is definitely repetitive, it doesn’t alarm him until it gets closer, closer, and abruptly turns into a low whistle at the threshold of the kitchen.
Derek grits his teeth and reminds himself that while charity is important to his mother, genuine kindness is more so, and she won’t hesitate to voice any disappointment.
“Does the cooking or the clean-up take longer?” a voice asks, followed shortly by footsteps.
“Not sure,” Derek says, wincing when the potato peeler slips and cuts into his finger. He flips the water on with his wrist, hopefully hiding the blood from sight until his skin knits itself back together seconds later. “My sisters are in charge of cleaning.”
There’s laughter from behind him, and the sound of the wooden spoon he’d been using to brown the butter as it clinks against the pot. “So it doesn’t matter much to you is what I’m getting out of that.”
Derek feels his lips quirk up, despite his reluctance to have his space invaded. “If there’s a single clean dish in this kitchen at the end of the day I’ve failed.” This time, when he hears laughter, he turns around to look at the source of it and almost immediately wishes he hadn’t. If there’s anything that makes Derek a little weak in the knees, it’s pale skin and big, dark eyes, and he looks away before he can take the man in fully and find even more appealing details.
“Need any help getting dirtying them up?” the guy asks. Derek’s about to decline—politely, of course, or God help him if his mother overhears—but then he adds, “Because to be honest it’s kind of awkward being out there, I’m pretty sure everyone knows each other? There are groups, at least, and I was supposed to come with my buddy because we decided it was a Christmas-only trip home this year, only his girlfriend invited him to Tahoe literally this morning and he didn’t tell me until I got here and it also felt awkward to leave, so …”
Derek starts peeling the potatoes again and tells himself to stay strong, but he can feel his resolve crumbling. “I don’t really need much help,” he says; a weak protest, but still true. He does so much of the prep ahead of time that it’s really just managing the timing of it all. The disappointment that radiates from the man is so palpable that Derek caves almost immediately. “But you can cube the potatoes, if you’d like.”
“Yeah, anything,” he hears, and then, “I’m Stiles, by the way.”
Stiles … doesn’t shut up. He talks as he cuts the potatoes in a way that makes Derek think he’s going to lose a finger by the end of the night, an abbreviated life story that gives just enough details to get Derek interested in hearing more. But for every small fact about himself he gives out he asks at least three questions of Derek, everything from his middle name to the first flavor of ice cream he’d ever considered his favorite, and Derek finds himself talking much more than he does to anyone he’s ever met. He doesn’t even realize he’s answering the questions until suddenly they’re knee-deep in an argument over the relative merits of the Wildcat formation and he realizes he’s ignored the timer on the oven going off for a solid two minutes while he details his very short college football career.
“So how’d you get stuck with all the cooking?” Stiles asks hours later, just as Derek’s pulling the turkey out of the oven to rest. He’s holding a casserole dish in his hands and although his body is still, he also seems to be vibrating with energy. “I’m just assuming this isn’t the first time because you seem to have everything under control, whereas I would have probably burned the turkey to get it to cook faster and forgotten like, the rolls or something.”
Derek pauses, still holding on to the roasting pan with both hands. The words send a jolt of adrenaline through him—not the good type, not the type that comes with elation or something equally serotonin-boosting—but dread, and a mild sense of panic.
He couldn’t have forgotten the rolls. He gets the frozen type, bags and bags of them, because once they defrost and rise they only take a few minutes to bake. It’s the last thing he does every year; he takes the casseroles out of the oven and puts four cookie sheets worth of rolls in, and by the time they’re done everything else is on the table.
“I forgot the rolls,” he says, letting go of the roasting pan and twisting to look at the island, where the shelf he typically keeps the cookie sheets on is depressingly empty. His heart feels like it’s sinking, even though he knows at the same time that there’s plenty of food and it’s not such a big deal. “I forgot to take them out.”
The oven door closes, pulling him out of his head, and Stiles taps at the buttons to set the timer. “I can grab them. Where are they?”
“In the freezer,” Derek says, probably too short, because Stiles raises an eyebrow in response. “Fuck, I never took them out. They take hours to rise, it’s too late. Shit.”
“So we go without,” Stiles says, shrugging. “If anyone complains, kick them out.”
He can’t keep himself from frowning. It’s such a simple, little thing, and he tends to get stuck on those at times and the unsettled feeling in his chest can stick around for hours. But then Stiles moves into his line of sight and reaches out, hand closing around his shoulder. “You’re cute when you’re upset,” he says, and grins even though a faint blush appears on his cheeks. “It’s not rolls, but I can make biscuits pretty quick if you’ve got flour and extra butter.”
Some of the pressure lifts off his chest. “Flour’s in the pantry,” he says, and Stiles nods once and turns around, further discussion not needed. Derek still needs to assemble the salads, but he takes a moment to find a clean mixing bowl and the pastry cutter so Stiles can get to work. It takes longer than the rolls would have, but everything is still hot when they come out of the oven, and he can’t even bring himself to care that his sisters will definitely make fun of him for messing up when Stiles breaks off a piece of a biscuit and holds it out for Derek to try.
They’re simple, but good—but even better is the way that Stiles kisses him back when Derek pulls him in, a little overwhelmed by the way the day turned out so differently than he had expected, but grateful.
“Thanks for that,” he says, quietly, when they part, gesturing to the basket Stiles had just piled all the biscuits into. “And everything else.”
“Thanks for letting me hide in here all day,” Stiles says with a grin. “Do you have to stick around for a while after dinner, or can I convince you to get late-night ice cream with me?”
“I could be convinced,” Derek says, picking up the last of the casserole dishes to bring to the table, “but I could also just forget to bring out that cherry pie you’ve been looking at all day and we could keep hiding.”
“Hiding’s good,” Stiles says quickly. “Hiding is great, let’s do that. Just not in here where I assume your sisters will be cursing our names as they clean, so—my place isn’t that far, if you wanna just … hide there. Instead. With the pie. You know, we could always get ice cream to go with the pie, that’s probably the best decision. Do people do a la mode with cherry pie?”
Derek shakes his head and grins, and uses his elbow to urge Stiles in front of him; they’ve only known each other a few hours, but he knows well how easily he can get distracted. “Come on,” he says. “Let’s go get this over with and we can find out.”
#sterek#fic#thanksgiving#fluff#eli writes#legit thought of this around 8:30 and started writing it around 10#just needed to write thanksgiving fluff i guess!
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Weekend WIP Game
My goodness I've been tagged so many times LET'S DO THIS Y'ALL
Thank you very much to @inexplicablymine @rockyroadkylers @gay-flyboys @happiness-of-the-pursuit @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @daisymae-12 and @kiwiana-writes for the tags I loved reading all of y'alls answers this is so much fun to see - thank you to @welcometololaland also for creating the game! :)
Rules: List your WIPs below (if you only write one fic at a time, feel free to include future WIPs/ideas!) then answer the following questions. Then, tag as many people as you have WIPs (or more).
WIP List (Bolded ones have an outline/words/some ideas, others are mostly just floating around in the dome for now) (none of these actually have legit titles kind of sort of whatever)
Walk and Talk (irl epistolary)
Soulmates (Music System)
3+1 companion fic to All of This Silence and Patience (prequel from Alex's POV)
Henry is a Painting
Phone-Sex Worker/Coffee Shop
5+1 love confession through non-verbal cues
S.M.U.T
Threesgiving
Secret Santa
Beach at Night
There is probably more but this is already getting long LOL
2. Which of your WIP’s is currently the longest?
I haven't "officially" started writing any because I tend to write one at a time and I just finished my halloween huh fic, but as of now it's either Walk and Talk or Soulmates - Walk and Talk has a ton of random scenes/snippets written and Soulmates has a 9 page (and still in progress) outline
3. Which WIP do you expect will end up the longest?
Soulmates or Henry is a Painting. They are both legitimate multichaps (my debut into them scary). I'm predicting that they will both be around 30-40K but I have a...tendancy...to go way over my predictions because I've like never been succinct in my life
4. Which WIP is your favorite to write/the most enjoyable to write? Why?
I've been having SO much fun with Walk and Talk - the idea is so special to me and it's just like pure fun and silliness and I think the formatting of it is very interesting too (this fic is my pride and joy if you can't tell yet)
5. Which WIP do you find the most intimidating to write? Why?
I think, as of now, Soulmates and Henry is a Painting. Soulmates is going to be my first real multichap so that in itself has me shaking in my boots nerves and excitement) - it also has a good amount of world building in it. I have the system figured out but now it's about how I'm going to incorporate it throughout the story. Henry is a Painting is also magical realism but it takes place in one setting and is essentialy a lot of conversations, so I'm a bit trapped in what I can do, but I think I can pull it off? I just have to put a lot of thought into it ha ha
6. Which WIP do you experience the most self-doubt about. Why?
Maybe Henry is a Painting? The idea is very special to me but because of what I said in #5 I have to ensure it doesn't get tiring. A lot of introspection and mental health discussion and important conversations are mixed in to this one, but it's also mysterious and fun
7. Which of your WIP’s will you seek out a beta/sensitivity reader for? Why?
All of them. Maybe even two. I will never not have any of my fics beta'd because I want to ensure that they're the best that they can be I have too much anxiety and need for praise to not have them
8. Have any of your WIP’s been struck by the curse of writers block?
Not really? If anything, I'm just very indecisive and it takes me a long time to figure out where I want to go with certain aspects of a fic. I try to make sure that I start on fics that I feel a lot of excitement for when I choose what I want to do next
9. Which WIP has your favorite OC? Tell us about them?
Threesgiving with @happiness-of-the-pursuit is the only one as of now. His name is Collin. That's basically all we've got ish for now
10. Which WIP is the sexiest?
Threesgiving and Phone-Sex Worker/Coffee shop for sure. The latter is essentially... a lot of sexting... if that wasn't obvious - but also it's a double plotline (think love triangle but there's only two people quote unquote double identity but no one knows it vibes LOL). S.M.U.T withe @inexplicablymine will be too because it'll explore a lot of fic tropes but it's also very silly funny
11. Which WIP is the angstiest?
Henry is a Painting for the reasons I mentioned. Soulmates too because it deals a lot with unrequited love in a way that parallels canon but with much higher stakes
12. Which WIP has the best characterization (in your humble opinion)?
I would hope all of them but maybe Walk and Talk. It's from Henry's POV but I really love how I'm writing Alex - he's very open and effervescent and full of light vibes
13. Which WIP has the best scene setting (in your humble opinion)?
I'll answer this in a slightly different way and say Soulmates because it's my foray into world building and I have an entire soulmate system (and the magical realism elements) planned out that I'm very proud of because I don't think the exact thing that I'm doing has been done before
14. Which WIP have you worked the hardest on?
Walk and Talk has extensive scenes planned and a full outline - there's still some wiggly room in the middle/figuring out the order of things though but I'll figure it out. Soulmates too because, y'know, the outline is nine pages long and isn't even done yet
15. Which WIP do you have the highest expectations for? Why?
I'm such a broken record wow. Walk and Talk is my BABY - it has a very fun formatting because it is essentially and irl epistolary and i've been sitting on it for over a month now waiting to get started. Soulmates is an idea I'm insanely proud of and I can't wait to see it come to the page. Henry is a Painting has the potential to be... dare I say it... kind of beautiful and introspective? Idk when I'll start it because it scares me I need to handle it carefully and when I'm truly ready
16. Do you dream about any of your WIP’s?
Not that I can remember. Though, it will be like 2 a.m. and I'll roll over to tell siri to write stuff down and hope it's legible in the morning
17. Do any of your WIP’s have any particular complexities that your other fics don’t?
Walk and Talk has an interesting formatting to separate scenes. Soulmates has a... soulmate system (duh) and magical realism elements. Also any of these that are a multichap or a 3/5+1 because I've only ever written one shots
18. Which WIP is the funniest or has the most humor?
Walk and Talk, Phone-Sex Worker/Coffee Shop, and Secret Santa I would say
19. Do any of your WIPs contain outside POVs or a deep dive on a character other than the main ship? How are you finding that process?
Sadly no but I'd like to do so one day
20. Tell us one thing we don’t know about one or more of your WIPs.
I could ramble forever (maybe I should do an ask game... hmmmm)
The idea for Walk and Talk came from my real life. Essentially, it's when you make a pal in class, they wait for you when it's over, and walk down the hall with you to carry on conversing until y'all have to part ways. And then it happens the next day. And the day after that. And the one after that too. You get the vibe. Now make it FirstPrince
I told myself that All of This Silence and Patience would never get a sequel until I got one (one.) comment asking for Alex's POV and then my mind starting buzzing and now y'all get a prequel instead
Uhhhh I've been tagged a lot so idk if I can tag as many people as WIPs but I would love to see anything from @anincompletelist @whimsymanaged @read-and-write- @tintagel-or-cockleshells @littlemisskittentoes @cricketnationrise @myheartalivewrites (no pressure) and anyone else who is seeing this! :)
#tag game#weekend wip game#wip tag game#affectionatelyrs#rwrb#red white and royal blue#rwrb fic#rwrb fanfic#alex claremont diaz#henry fox mountchristen windsor#firstprince#rwrb fandom#fanfiction
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Things I believe Matsukawa Issei and you’re kid would say if you lived together (From the moment you wake up to the moment you fall asleep)
i’m ONLY doing this because @sloppykyuu is just begging me to write about Issei 🙄 (and @kac-chowsballs requested it as well)
Merry christmas Pea! I’m Latina so i celebrate today (the 24th) 💚
established relationship || fem mommy reader || you and Matus have a kid together and you call him Bub/kiddo/bean their name is Sora (unisex name so u can decide if it’s a girl or boy)
“Hey bean, let’s go wake up your momma.” (7:00 am)
“No... mommy’s scary when she makes up.”
“I know bub, i wake up to her every morning, how do you think i feel?”
you: “I can hear you Issei!!!”
“He meant to say scary beautiful momma.”
you: “Don’t defend your dad bub.”
“Shut up and give me a kiss woman.”
“How’d you sleep? Good? Good.”
“Not feeling sore?”
“Ow, he’s not even listening, huh bean.”
“What?”
“See exactly my point.”
“I don’t work today, so how about we go out today and have some family time.”
*will tangle his fingers in your hair while you’re still in bed*
“Or do you wanna stay in bed and get a sitter~”
“Ow, dont hit me. I’m just making suggestions.”
“Hey, bean- why don’t you give daddy and mommy some alone time, yeah?”
*your kid whines a little because he low key was falling asleep on your chest*
you: “Come on kiddo, i’ll make you whatever you want for breakfast.” (7:30 am)
“anything?”
*Sora’s legit rushing out the door*
“Come here.”
*Isseis already dressed but you’re nude on the sheets, makes you sit on his lap anyways*
“You sure you don’t wanna get a sitter.”
*he’s holding your hips and he’s kissing you all over, he’s doing it in a sweet romantic manner*
“You can have a date night and everything.”
“You know bean doesn’t mind, he’s old enough to get that mommy and daddy need alone time.”
“Family time? You sure?”
*hes caressing the small of your back and just giving you the most softest smile.”
“Come on , get up and let’s make Sora some breakfast.” (8:00 am)
*he really do be handing you one of his old uniform shirt and a pair of his clean boxers, he knows they makes you feel comfy*
“Bean, hey- leave your mom alone while she’s cooking.”
“But i wanna watch.”
*big eye roll from Issei but he’s not surprised he’s fascinated with his mother because, like father like son*
“Need some help?”
“Are you sure?
“Fine... Give me a kiss.”
“Their not even watching...”
“You look sexy in my clothes, have I told you that?”
*smacks you’re ass before kissing your cheek and walking back to Sora*
“Done? Look good babe.”
“No,no,no put the dishes down.”
“You cook, I clean, remember?”
*you roll your eyes and set the plates down in the sink*
“Good girl. Go clean up with Sora while i do this.” (9:00 am)
*you and Sora are in the bath together missing around, making a mohawk with their hair and everything*
*Matsu is all finished up with the dishes when he’s leaning on the door frame and listening to the two of you giggle in the bath*
*god he’s so in love with you it’s so sweet*
“You guys finished yet?” (9:40 am)
you: “Take a picture pops, it’ll last longer.”
“Take a picture- yeah you know what maybe i will.”
*takes a few pictures, definitely takes some on you and crops out Sora*
“Come on bean, let’s give mommy some alone time.”
“Want me to dress them?”
“Oh come on, i don’t dress then up so bad.”
“Fine, fine- I’ll keep it simple.”
“Stay here bean, i’ll be right back. I’m gonna check up on mom, yeah?”
you: “Why are you back here Issei.”
“Mmm just wanted to see if my sweet girl needs some company.” (10:00 am)
*a very quiet quicky, will fuck you over the sink with his hand wrapped around your neck so your back is so close to his chest, makes you watch yourself drool over his cock*
“You don’t want Sora to know that her mommy is a slut for her daddy’s cock.”
*hes legit got such a foul mouth*
“MOMMY I NEED TO PEE!!!”
*Issei burst out laughing bc you’re mid orgasm*
“Mommy’s coming Sora...”
*you’re punching his thigh a couple a thighs because he’s being an asshole*
“hurry im gonna pee of the floor.”
“Bean, you’re not even dressed yet.”
*bean is really running naked into the bathroom*
“I wanted mommy to dress me.”
you: “see i told you, you suck at dressing them.”
“hey- i’m trying my best here.” (10:20 am)
you: “Bubs, you’re getting to old to carry.”
“No im not.”
“No he’s not.”
“Come here, mom’s too weak to carry you bean.”
“No she’s not.”
you: “Thanks bean but mommy is a little weak so i need Issei to carry you.”
“But i don’t want papa.”
“Ouch, that hurt.”
“Only if papa buys me some tokoyaki.”
“Deal, come here bug.”
*Sora is a crawler so he likes crawling up from your feet until you cary him and he’s don’t it to the point where he scratches*
*that’s why issei doesn’t let him climb in him anymore- he picks him up and throws him on his shoulders*
“Woah, i’m so tall! Look momma!”
“Hey, give me your hand.”
“Because i wanna hold it woman, now give it to me.”
“Do you wanna share tokoyaki? No, thought so.”
“Open up *issei 100% likes feeding you in public to embarass you* Good girl. Taste good?” (1:00 pm)
*you probably take Sora to a park because she’s very energetic and needs to let it out somewhere*
“They’re getting so big...”
“Let me put another baby in you, yeah?”
“Come on, you’d look so good all full and plum for me.”
“Stop blushing woman, you should know you’re sexy by now.”
*he knudges your hip while you hide your face into his back*
*he kisses your hair and then the tip of your nose*
*Sora is running towards their dad and shes pulling on his jeans*
“Is mommy crying or did you embarrass her again.”
“I embarrassed her again.”
*cue pouty Sora*
“Bad daddy, come on momma, let’s get you away from meanie.”
you: “yes please.” (2:00 pm)
*sora makes you push them of the swings*
*issei once again is taking pictures of you if his kid*
*sora ends up playing with dogs that are like twice her size and one of them topples over her and she’s flying to the grown*
you: “Sora! You alright baby?!”
“let’s do that again mommy!!!”
“Do that one more time and i think you’ll kill your mommy.”
*you go back with issei for a bit and someone starts a fight with Sora bc she took someone’s swing*
“MOMMY THEY STARTED IT!!!”
you: “I know sora, hold on a second.”
*you get in a small altercation with another mother and you snap at them, leaving them quiet as hell*
“That was really sexy.”
you: “She called bean mean things, you thought i was gonna sit there and just listen?”
“Mmm, feisty... That’s very sexy of you momma bear.”
you: “Issei i’m gonna punch you.”
“Understood princess.”
“You two hungry yet?” (4:00 pm)
“YES! More tokoyaki!!!”
you: “bean you’ve had enough tokoyaki.”
“There’s no such thing.”
you: “yes there is, and i’m in the mood for ramen.”
“Got it, ramen it is. Let’s do Sora.”
“but.... tokoyaki.”
“Bean, they 100% have tokoyaki.”
“YES!!!”
you: “Carefull bean the foods probably hot.” (5:30 pm)
*they proceed to throw a tokoyaki ball in their mouth and they immediately spit it out*
“HOT TOKOYAKI!! OUCH!”
“Bean, this is why you listen to mommy.”
“I’m sleepy!” (6:30 pm)
you: “you want me to pick you up?”
“please!”
you: “They out yet?” (7:00 pm)
“Out cold...”
“Hold on, don’t move... Let me take picture.”
“Look this way, good girl- now smile for me.”
*looking down at his phone a little to long while he’s admiring you with his kid*
“We made that.”
“God please let me put another baby in you.”
“Give me a kiss pretty girl.”
“I love you.” (8:30 pm)
“Want me to tuck them in?”
“Alrighty hand them over. You go get ready for bed.”
“They really are out cold.”
“Mmm you look so beautiful.”
“Give me a kiss.”
“I can’t say it enough but you- You are so damn fine.”
*he 100% is fucking you with purpose tonight. he’s such a good baby daddy and just fills you up to the brim with his cum while fucking your pretty pussy*
“Let me lay on your chest baby.”
*proceeds to kiss your chest*
“I love you so much sweet girl.”
#haikyuu!!#haikyuu#haikyuu manga#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu spoilers#timeskip haikyuu#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu x y/n#haikyuu x you#haikyuu x me#haikyuu x manager#matsukawa smut#matsukawa x y/n#issei matsukawa#matsukawa issei#hq matsukawa#matsukawa haikyuu#haikyuu matsukawa#matsukawa fluff#matsukawa oneshot#issei matsukawa x reader#matsukawa issei x reader#matsukawa issei x you#anime x you#anime / manga#anime x reader#aoba jōsai#seijoh#seijoh x reader
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Episode 30, the alleged halfway mark, at last!
I’m fresh out of jokes so let’s hop right into the review!
Pictured above: Characters who supposedly exist in this series
More under the cut as usual
So last week I listed the things episode 30 needed to do to make me not hate it. They were: 1) Sora had to stay with Taichi and be part of the action, 2) the other characters had to feature here and there to progress their storylines even if the main focus remained on Taichi, and 3) WarGreymon’s appearance needed to be dramatic.
Well... guess who didn’t get Bingo this episode -_____-’
I am... seriously... mind-boggled. This is bizarre. Yes, we all understand that evolutions just aren’t the big deal they were in 99 Adventure, BUT this episode DOES try to convince us that WarGreymon IS a big deal. It just fails at it spectacularly, in my opinion at least. As for the rest: Sora stays with Taichi, but he tells her to take the helpless Digimon to safety and then we don’t see her do anything but stand around waiting for Taichi. Most of the other characters don’t even get a cameo, let alone story progression. Taichi reflects on them briefly at one point but it’s unbelievably stupid. Only Koushirou has anything to do and he is STILL JUST STARING AT HIS COMPUTER.
My expectations for episode 30 weren’t super high, given the current storyline, but I’m honestly slackjawed by how BORING this episode was. They really seem to have decided to rest the entirety of the show on Taichi, and much though I love him, I just don’t think he CAN carry it by himself. Not only has he long been unbelievable as a grade school kid even for shonen anime standards, he doesn’t crack jokes, he doesn’t show personality... all he does is fight. Like, the show isn’t ALWAYS like this - I’ve legit enjoyed it a various times, and I know why - it was always when the team was together and we learned things about them and the fighting was balanced out. So I never know from one week to the next how I’m gonna feel about the new episode. But I do think this is the episode I hate the most to date. :/
We had a promising start with Garudamon still actively fighting several Megadramon at once, simultaneously barbecuing Sora.
Fortunately it’s magic so she’s not dead, nor has she fallen to death.
Taichi and MetalGreymon continue fighting the Allomon on the ground.
The mysterious Lopmon looks on with a judgmental glare, wondering why he isn’t currently being carried like a baby. Walking is hard, he wants to be carried. Taichi do your job
Taichi: cmon lopmon you have to learn to do things on your own
Lopmon: no I want to play video games
Taichi: well then I refuse to buy you any more games. if you want them you’ll have to get a job and earn the money
Lopmon: daaaad! youre ruining my life! uggh!
Koushirou keeps an eye on the misbehaving satellites.
Taichi and Sora debate what to do. It’s difficult to protect the forest Digimon while fighting at the same time, so Taichi tells Sora to bring them to safety while he fends off their enemies on his own. WHAT THE HELL IS THIS PLAN. Since it’s a shonen anime, I normally wouldn’t whine about this but... it was just last episode that we were shown Taich cannot cope with the combined attack of that many enemies at once on his own. He needed Sora’s help. Why he now thinks he can do it is a mystery.
Taichi can maybe handle the Allomon and Megadramon on his own, but last episode Tankmon also appeared, and this time, lo and behold, in comes Parrotmon. Sorry Taichi but you brought this on yourself.
Meanwhile Koushirou communicates with “someone from the Internet” and learns that the satellites are all rerouting to converge on the same location:
The freaking International Space Station!
Which will then surely explode! And cause lots of trouble both in space and on earth!
^Pictured: Koushirou’s “oh shit” face
^Pictured:MetalGreymon’s “oh shit” face
MetalGreymon proved to be weak to the lightning Parrotmon emits. If there’s a reason, they don’t explain, but I like the idea that he’s particularly weak to it because he’s a cyborg and the electricity disrupts his... circuits :P Then Parrotmon gets hit with a beam of dark energy and evolves!
Into Klosmon? Krosmon? IDK, IDC.
^Pictured: Taichi’s “oh shit” face
They get their butts handed to them. Taichi and Agumon fall unconscious. Rather than take the chance to deliver the finishing blow, Klosmon or whatever politely waits for them to wake up.
Taichi’s consciousness is swept into a white empty world...
where he finds the Crest of Courage looking weirdly sentient... or maybe that’s just me...
MetalGreymon just looks possessed
Taichi: Are you alive?
Agumon: Yeah... you okay?
Taichi: Yeah... uhh... well... sort of...
Not being dead = I’m still ok
So here’s where the episode really loses me... After visiting the blank world, Taichi is suddenly able to recall what happened after Devimon ate him.
This makes little sense since he seemed pretty KO’d at the time, but okay, find, he woke up long enough to see WarGreymon and now he’s remembering it, sure why not. But I hate that they did this whole “ohh he doesn’t remember!” thing and then solved it like this. Presto! Now he remembers! It’s maaaagic!
And as ADORABLE as the two of them holding hands like this and resolving to keep fighting is... I just can’t be impressed by a battle with Parrotmon. Or Klosmon or whatever it is now. There’s a reason most shows save dramatic moments and big epiphanies for battles that actually progress the storyline. It makes a much bigger impact. This just feels like someone saying “Woohoo it’s Tuesday!” and then you ask “what’s special about it, is it your birthday or something?” and they say “Nope I just felt like being excited that it’s Tuesday!”
I mean points for optimism and all but it doesn’t make a very good story.
Taichi helps Agumon walk x’D They are planning to keep fighting even like this.
And I get that the “never give up!” attitude is essential to the shonen anime protagonist, but when you literally can’t walk by yourself anymore, it’s important to take care of your health is ALSO an important message this show might consider teaching kids once in a while -.-”
In spite of his unsteady legs, Agumon’s still able to evolve again and powers up to fight Klosmon.
It uh... doesn’t go well.
The one cool thing here is the way Taichi sets about attempting to make MetalGreymon evolve. Although we already knew the children play an important role in evolving their partners, Taichi seems to really understand it now, and focuses deeply. It’s a much more active role than we’ve seen before - it seems like more than the usual “encouraging thoughts and emotional ties” spurring the evolution.
At least he’s still super cute.
So we have already seen the Crests many times, I knew that... but my theory was that, in order to reach the final evolutionary stage, they would need the help of the physical Crests. So that’s what I thought Mimi was doing with those crystals.
But Taichi is indeed about to call WarGreymon. So... I have no idea what use Mimi’s gonna find for those crystals x’D I suppose she’ll make herself and Palmon matching necklaces. Or sell them on the black market.
From her super safe hiding spot, Sora watches in awe, wishing she too were a real character on this show and not just an inconvenience as far as most of the writing staff are concerned
I love WarGreymon’s shield.
BAM. He appears. It’s dramatic. But only just.
WarGreymon defeats Klosmon and explodes the forest... Uhhh, weren’t we supposed to be protecting it?
Taichi and WarGreymon then join Sora and the forest Digimon and uh... that’s the episode.
Oh yeah, we get one more hint that Lopmon is more than just some random idiot. Lol. This episode hinted at Lopmon, reminded us that Hikari’s been abducted, and told us that the International Space Station might explode, and then addressed none of those.
The message on the bottom says that the next episode will be on January 10, meaning there will be no episode next week as per usual due to New Year’s holidays.
Next week’s episode:
Turns out Lopmon is one of the holy Digimon or something. Honestly not a surprise, I mean, it’s Lopmon. Should have occurred to me earlier.
Also we got what I think is our first named mention of Millenniumon and it looks like Hikari might find out somethig about him. So that’s cool. The rest of the episode seems to stick with Taichi and Sora’s group... The only thing I can say hopefully is that, since WarGreymon’s appeared, MetalGarurumon ought to be not too far off. So that should mean we at least get a Yamato-centric episode in the not too distant future.
Okay, a couple weeks ago I said I had some stuff to say but would wait till episode 30 to do it... so stop here if you don’t want to read me ranting :P It mostly amounts to what I complained about in the beginning: This season is just so hyper-focused on the fights and seems to treat the team aspect as an afterthought. Which makes no sense to me. Honestly, I don’t mind the excessive fighting - that’s common in shonen anime and grown up me can’t expect to be interested in the same stuff that interests 8 year old boys.
I don’t even mind the idea of Taichi’s role as main character getting an upgrade - like, in 99, he was the main character, but it was felt a lot less. Better balanced with the others’ roles, I mean. I think it’s totally okay to make Taichi a more central character and the plot focus in the new season - it wouldn’t be my choice, of course, but that doesn’t mean it’s inherently bad. But the way they’re going about it just doesn’t make sense to me. Even Taichi isn’t interesting half the time. He just fights.
Like I said before, this isn’t the way the show always is. There have been some highlights. I truly loved a few episodes, and the show does seem to have fallen into a pattern of being good for a while and then degrading into something like today’s episode. I don’t know why: budget? pandemic? or is this really, legitimately, what the show producers want to show kids? I guess, in the end, this show really may be about selling toys and selling toys only. (But, if that’s the case, I’m even more surprised that they don’t make a bigger deal about all the evolutions...)
A lot of things I liked the most happened in the very beginning - the first three episodes in particular. The characters interacted with each other. Their feelings and actions influenced each other. Fighting happened, a lot, but it wasn’t the only thing happening. I was pretty excited then. I didn’t expect to love this show like I love 99 - that’s just not possible, I’m too old and 99 is too special to me for me to trust my judgment - I was just happy to see the Adventure kids back and entertaining a new generation.
But since then it’s been a roller coaster with few highs and a lot of lows. Although it’s hard to imagine how the pandemic would have changed the storyline, episode 4 was where they paused the show for Japan’s lockdown-but-not-really, and once they picked back up the tone just seemed kind of different from the first three episodes. Not right away - I think the intro episodes for the rest of the team were pretty reminiscent of “Digimon Adventure” - but that makes sense, they had 4 ready to go and probably had made headway on the next few episodes before they closed down the studio. Anyway, that’s just a guess, since it seems like everything’s been affected by the pandemic, but with a few exceptions we have all been back to work more or less normally since June...
The thing is, there are lots of fighting shonen anime - tons of protagonists who never give up and never fall in spite of how hurt they get, and who get unlimited “evolutions” in return for their tenacity. That’s all fine. It’s the genre. But the thing is...! The thing is, those other shows, they all tend to have humor, to care at least marginally about character relationships, and understand that that’s how you build up a main character: just winning fights alone doesn’t cut it. So I just don’t know what to make of this new Adventure show. It’s FINE when the team is together. We get cool character moments and insights and even some joking around. But they KEEP SEPARATING THEM. This time they didn’t even have more than a single episode together before they were all split up again! I wonder if it’s because they’re having trouble getting all the voice actors in due to pandemic-related issues and budget issues etc. If so, HUGE bummer. Of all the years for Digimon Adventure to get a reboot... why did it have to be this miserable excuse for a year...
Le sigh.
But there’s nothing we can do about it. I’m just going to like what I like and hope for the best in the future. I really would love for the new Adventure to be popular with kids and keep that cast going. I don’t expect it to compete with the lids of Kinmetsu no Yaiba or anything. I just hope that, when we hit the final episode, we look back and say that the season was overall worth the reboot. I hate the thought of looking back and saying “well, that sure was dull.” It’s just an insult. 99 Adventure wasn’t the most unique storyline in the world, but it had a lot of uniqueness IN it, and what made it special was its treatment of the team and the child-partner relationships. The reboot doesn’t need to be exactly the same, but it shouldn’t be forgettable.
That’s why us being at the 30 episode mark concerns me. At this point we know how the show is paced and what’s it like. We can’t really argue that we just don’t know enough to make a judgmenet yet. It’s hard to believe things will suddenly change. If they do, assuming the change is for the better, I’ll be thrilled, but I’ll also feel sad that we missed out on so many chances for cool things to happen in the first half.
#digimon adventure 2020#digimon adventure:#digimon adventure reboot#digi spoilers#digimon#fizz watches digimon 2020
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immj2 16.11.20 lb
chanchal interrogating ishani, ki did riddhima spill about what happened that day. ishani like no dice, but imma beat it outta her so help me goddddd.
aryan coming throwing shit around. coz vansh has left everything in his will to dadi. thank fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk. none of you snakes are worth 5000 cr. i mean, ishani is, but idk, maybe not that whole amount at once.
ishani is like THANK THE LORD, VANSH HAD AT LEAST ONE WORKING BRAIN CELL. “kahin uss riddhima ko nominee banaa dete, toh humaare sar par chadhke tandav karti woh.” snort.
chanchal telling aryan ki “vansh ke baad saara business toh tuney hi sambhaalna haina”, and lmaoooooooooooooooooooooooo ishani’s face:
i honestly love her the most. MAKE HER THE NEW KING OF THIS EMPIREEEEEEEEEEE. SHE DESERVESSSSSSS IT.
ishani saunters off and chanchal is telling aryan ki anyway dadi ke haath laga hai sab, she’ll write it all to you; coz siya is in a coma, who knows when the fuck she’ll wake up, and ishani is walking talking TNT ka khaaaaan, that’ll blow up any second now. tujhe hi sab milna hai. lol bohut hi zyaada khushfehmi. can’t waitttttt for vihaan (whether he turns out to be vansh or not.......) to come show them thenga.
some parcel came outta nowhere for mummyji and it’s filled with all the stuff of her “long lost son who got kidnapped”. veryyyyyyyy conveniently opened by riddhima.
mummy has started filmfare nom-worthy performance on discovering the relics.
there’s a letter too! basically says i kidnapped your kid for money, but when you didn’t pay up, i threw him in a river. i’m confessing all this coz i’m now dying of cancer and want redemption. sounds to me like someone watched both ‘the prince of egypt’ and ‘badlapur’ in one day and did a mashup of those stories to write this letter.
watch out meryl, viola, jodie.......... mummy has gone beyond filmfare and is now doing OSCAR worthy performance about how she keeps losing kids.
lmao i am aryan, watching this nautanki:
mummy like it’s all coz i neverrrrrrrrrrrr accepted riddhima as a motherrrrrrrrrrr, mujhe maaaf kar dooooo.
of course riddhima’s dumb ass forgave her. god, this chick just tooo easy to scam.
someone’s come to say “final goodbye”. coz he’s taken a transfer. sure.
lmao riddhima is the biggest mood when dealing with an ex who just won’t leave you the fuck alone.
is it just me or has his hair become more........... vansh-y??? like, height-wise.
blah blah he wants to apologize to everyone........... for what exactly? he said he was just doing his job, why to say sorry for that??
lmao ishani has appeared and is ready to kick kabir’s ass. omfg i think this might be my new fav dynamic of this show, ishani v/s kabirrrrrrrrrrr.
RIDDHIMA DOING NOTHING TO STOP HER ALSO, LMAOOOOOO
whole family has appeared and he’s like sorry kehne aaya tha and all and THENNNNNNNNNNN....... NAZAR PADI ON THE TABLE FULL OF ARTIFACTS.
anupriya like don’t touch my son’s shit and........
“yeh sab mere hain!!!!!!!!!”
hahahahahahahhahahahaha ishani is truly my absolute favourite character of this show from now on.
“maaaaaaaaaaaa?????? iska matlab aap meri maa hain??????” lol bohut hi bhadddda actingggg.
riddhima agrees with ishani.
kabir narrates exact story mummy did like 5 min back.
he’s giving proof ki i know the collar of this uniform has a K behind it and everyone’s shockedddddddddd ki oh god yet another middle class orphan is gonna make their way here
wow the terrible acting from mummy and beta is just.......... peak today. i can’t take it.
my question is, kabir has come to this house and seen anupriya a million times before, it never clicked for him then????? anupriya looks to be baaaarely in her 40s, she wouldn’t have looked much different when she was younger. why didn’t he recognize her then. SOMEONE USE YOUR BRAIN AND ASK HIM THAT. ISHANI, ARYAN, SOMEONE?!!!?!?!
ok ishani didn’t ask that but she’s like that kid was thrown into a river, i’m pretty sure he’s dead. and kabir doing extra naatak ki yes, i was thrown into the river but a policewaala saved me and raised me and that’s why i’m police now.
ugh itnaaa sasta acting lol.
high time this pinky and the brain team up and take the rest of these fuckers downnnnnnnn.
lmao riddhima is soooooooooooooo angry rn. she didn’t even get this mad when her fucking husband paralysed her. that’s just how much petty hatred male exes deserve. the fact that that their bitch ass is even alive and wasting oxygen on the damn planet is fucking unacceptable.
OMFG MUMMY BETA ARE LEGIT WHISPERING INTO EACH OTHER’S EARS WHILE HUGGING, GIVING SHABAASHI ABOUT THIS BRILLIANT PLAN. IN FRONT OF EVERYONE. SERIOUSLY, YOU COULDN’T WAIT TILL YOU WERE ALONE???????????????????/
“kamaaaaal ki acting, KAMAAAAL KI ACTING!” lmaoooooooooooo honestly, this show would be fucking unwatchable if not for vishal cheesing it up in every other scene and making it so damn hilarious. kabir played by anyone else would never be this likable. his dialogue delivery of these lines is just A+
lmao he’s hamming some more about how he’s been searching for his mom allllll his life and today he’s leaving the city and finally found her.
LITERALLY EVERYONE ELSE AROUND THEM HAS A FACE LIKE SOMETHING WITH 8+ LEGS CRAWLED ACROSS THEIR DINNER PLATE. IT’S SO HILARIOUSSSSSSSS.
he’s like mom, come with me, and she’s like “tum yehi ruk jao!” and omfggggggg the reactionsssssssssssss:
“ab yeh bhi yaheen rahega?????” alkjdsalkjdlaskjdlaskj chanchal’s no filter ways really come in handy sometimes.
kabir’s like no no mom will come with me. starts leading her out and dadi is like no anupriya is a part of this family and will not leave. and if you can live here in this house................... riddhima will decide that. lmao this should work out well.
kabir trying to jedi mind trick her.
even ishani is pleading in her mind, please riddhima no kehnaaaaa. aaaaaand....
“haan.” great.
big mood.
lmao booooooo, the amount of shit you get away with just coz you’re so stinkin’ cute. you’re exactly like my asshole cat son. just worming your way into my heart by the power of your adorable faces, you absolute bastardssssssss.
oh of course. she had this conversation with vansh, about if mummy ever found her son, he’d like to welcome him into this family as his brother. sentiment mein aakar haan keh diya. BITCH HE DIDN’T KNOW THAT IT WAS GONNA TURN OUT TO BE YOUR EX WHO WAS HAATH DHOKE BEHIND HIS GODDAMN LIFE. IF HE DID, HE WOULDN’T HAVE THOUGHT TWICE BEFORE PULLING THAT UGLYASS GOLDEN GUN ON HIM AND SHOOTING HIM BETWEEN THE EYES.
this is a sweet scene and all but dude how the fuck am i supposed to overlook the fucking ugly beetlejuice suit. if i never have to see this godforsaken garment ever again, it’d still be too soon.
also jesus, were you a goddamn kid just 10 years ago, COZ HOW ELSE THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE A MINION WATERBOTTLE FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD?!!?!?!?!! OH GOD YOU GUYS, IS VANSH JUST 19 YEARS OLD OR SOME SHIT, AND THE BEARD AND THE VOICE THREW US OFF INTO THINKING HE’S 30?!?!?!?!?!!?! OH MY GOD, I FEEL LIKE A PEDO NOW. 28 IS MY LIMIT ON HOW YOUNG I’LL GO FOR WHEN I LUST AFTER SOMEONE.
anyway i’m fwding this scene so that my mind won’t dwell on these horrible possibilities. and that horrible fucking outfit.
lmao riddhima is like kaash tum yahaan hote, tum bhi yehi karte. snort, okaaaay sis.
“tumhari riddhima hoon main. aur hamesha wohi karoongi, jo agar tum hote toh karte.” ok everybody start monitoring your drinks from now on. pata nahi kab kya mila de yeh madam vansh 2.0.
ishani is, how you say................ LOSING IT.
ahahahahahahahahahaha aryan, who's going to town on the punching bag, is like i already picture him here, hence the vigorous mid-day cardio.
“mera toh mann kar raha hai ki main 2-4 jamaa ke aaoon. kabir ko nahi, uss riddhima ko!!!!!!!!” The Biggest Mood, Ever.
“pehle woh bhai ki tarah sochna toh seekh le?!?!?!?” bhai ki tarah chodo, pehle BAS SOCHNA HI SEEKH LE, WOHI BOHUT HAI.
ishani like i’m sureeeeeeeee kabir found out the story about mom’s missing son and now that vansh isn’t here, wormed his way into the house. PRESENTING TO YOU, THE ONLY ONE WITH A BRAIN IN THIS HOUSEEEEEEEEEEE. THE FACT THAT VANSH SLEPT ON HER AS A FUCKING PILLAR TO THIS HOUSE IS FUCKING RUDE.
“yeh sab kuch hua hai uss stuuuuupid riddhima ki wajah se!” that’s what they should call the show.
ew kabir is in riddhima’s room and getting all touchy and LIKE BACK THE FUCK OFF MAN. SERIOUSLY, YOU GOT WHAT YOU WANTED, NOW GO HANG OUT WITH YOUR MOM ALL DAY LONG, INSTEAD OF ACTING SKEEZY.
yeah riddhima pretty much told him that. threw in some more shit about how she’ll hate him till she dies, coz he’s the reason vansh died.
he doesn’t look happy about that. this fucker still wants herrrrrrr. ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. kabir yaaaaaaaaaaaaar, you can do so much bettterrrrrrrrrrr. get yourself an hot evil shawty with 4+ brain cells dude!
she’s dragging him out. nice.
kabir still talking and she’s like do i literally have to kick your ass out?????? damn girl, there’s the spine i like to see.
askljdaslkjslkdjlaskdjlaskdj he’s like main bhi vansh jaisa hoon, iss ghar ka beta hoon. lmao good you said this in front of riddhima and not ishani, warna ***** phaad ke tumhare haath mein de deti.
riddhima also handing it to him, but verbally. but it’s lameass shit like no you’ll never be like vansh, not in 7 janam. like, ok i get she’s really mad at him for what happened, but i don’t get what’s this sudden hatred of his personality?????? she doesn’t know the whole truth and abhi se itni nafrat??? based on what?????
lmao he muttered “woh toh waqt hi batayega” as he was leaving and she’s like BITCH WHAT YOU SAY?!?!?!?!?!?!
hee hee hee hee. i loveeeeeee when he makes his exasperated faces.
some more sweet talk about how she’ll see his intentions aren’t bad at all, and she’s like justttttttttt gtfo my room man.
"kahin kabir ko yahaan rehne ki permission dekar kuch galat toh nahi kar diya???” LMAO YA THINK?????????????????????/
haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaye. finally. aankhein taras gayi thi.
bro refusing more shady work coz “abhi mere paas chote-mote kaamon ke liye time nahi hai. kuch bada plan kar raha hoon.”
mmmmmmmmmmmm baby what that mouth do??????
“vansh ki body ka toh main antim-sanskaar main kar chuka hoon.” ohohohohohohohoho symbolism samajhhh rahe ho aap loggggg???? new identity, who disssssssss waala scene hai.
“riddhima vansh rai singhania, main aa rahaa hoon.”
oh aaja, aha aaja, aha aaajaa, ah ah aaaaja, ah aa aaaja, aha ha aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
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Digging Deeper
Thanks @alienfuckeronmain for the tag, this I’ve loved reading everyone’s, and I tag @taintedlav @rahashirley @raisemybody @twopoppies @cuethetommo @metal-eye and @seasurfacefullofclouds1 if anyone wants to play!!
1. Do you prefer writing with a black pen or blue pen? ink color matters less than ball-point-ness...
2. Would you prefer to live in the country or city? I want a witch’s cottage with a giant messy garden on the edge of the moors and a forest a million miles away from everyone. So country.
3. If you could learn a new skill what would it be? I’ve actually stretched myself this summer! Am learning French and guitar, and idk if it counts but learning my new job which I NEVER thought I could handle lol since I’ve never worked retail
4. Do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar? Honey ;)
5. What was your favourite book as a child? Well I have to say Narnia and Redwall, but when I was very tiny I loved this book about a girls who could whistle and speak to animals (named Mable) and the Velveteen Rabbit, and a book called “The Lost Princess” which is fucking amazing, by the precursor to CS Lewis, George MacDonald
6. Do you prefer baths or showers? I usually take showers because baths take too much time. Also baths are romantic and that makes me sad, and also I have to look at my body which, ug, not prepared to do that all the time rip
7. If you could be a mythical creature, which one would it be? Mer. Fucking. Maid. Though I’ve always wanted to fly too, I used to spend HOURS in the water just underwater swimming with my legs stuck together just pretending to be on ocean adventures
8. Paper or electronic books? I usually much prefer paper, but since I got these blue light blocking glasses I am finding i’m fine either way physically. Soul-wise though, yeah, paper
9. What is your favourite item of clothing? Probably my mango colored crop hoodie that I once smashed melting frozen blueberries on and then spent hours and days getting the stains out...
10. Do you like your name or would you like to change it? My real name is super boring and typical, though I do like it. I enjoy my tumblr name a lot, Toni, and it feels more genderless and constrictive than my actual name lol
11. Who is a mentor to you? I’ve had so many great teachers, but the biggest lesson I’ve learned in life is that so many you admire can be deeply flawed. I have lots of trust issues. I only take advice from a select few people, and they don’t include anyone ‘old and wise’ lol
12. Would you like to be famous and if so, what for? Oh for sure, I used to want to be an actress or a rock star or whatever. Famous author. I would fucking LOVE to have a platform and help people and cheer people up and see people grocery shopping and have instant friends. I know that sounds terribly naive but I’ve said before I share a lot of Harry’s personality, and I just love flirting with people and smiling with them and giving hugs. Now, I would want to be famous as TONI me and not real me, because then I could never be myself because my fam would find out rip
13. Are you a restless sleeper? Depends on my mattress. Currently, yes, ugg. I wake up in an omega nesting scene from a fic every morning
14. Do you consider yourself a romantic person? Unfortunately yes.
15. Which element best represents you? idk I usually say fire but I’m feeling more water lately
16. Who do you want to be closer to? I’m working on getting to know my amazing sister better, and that’s been lovely.
17. Do you miss someone at the moment? All my friends have been long distance for actual years, so i don’t miss anymore more than normal. I am missing just... the POTENTIAL for someone. This indefinite distancing is wearing on me.
18. Tell us about an early childhood memory. I was like two or three, and we were out on a full moon walk and I was in my stroller in the red sheepskin bundled up, and I remember coming up our sidewalk and looking at the world and moon and thinking, “remember this moment, or you’re going to grow up and forget how wonderful it was.” Also when I was five I had a breakdown on my mom’s lap because “I’m going to grow up and be too big to be sung lullabies to!” and I didn’t want anything to change EVER
19. What is the strangest thing you have eaten? I used to make a concoction of rye crackers, mustard, and pickles. Don’t ask
20. What are you most thankful for? all the opportunities I’ve had in life. I’m so massively privileged
21. Do you like spicy food? depends on how hot
22. Have you ever met someone famous? I saw a few celebs in NYC, Shosh from Girls, the guy from Monk, Tim Gun, John Oliver (and his golden retriever) and I passed a drunk as a skin Alec Baldwin outside Lincoln Center one day. Probably other people I didn’t recognize. Oh and S**** M***** rented my instrument right before covid hit here, and drunk him (or high him) couldn’t believe he had a h*** to play around on, and then I saw him staring at mountains being the most stereotypical rich white boy ever, also he did not send out gay vibes but don’t let that stop your Shiall, please don’t let it
23. Do you do you keep a diary or journal? I almost always start with the new year and do like. A day. And then forget.
24. Do you prefer to use a pen or a pencil? PEN
25. What is your star sign? Aries sun, Aquarius moon, Pisces rising
26. Do you like your cereal soggy or crunchy? Depends on the cereal, those golden grams were BEST thoroughly soaked in milk fight me
27. What would you want your legacy to be? make the world a little better
28. Do you like reading, what was the last book you read? Yes but you know, i’m the worst at making time for it. Still getting through that Brief Interviews with Hideous Men or whatever it is
29. How do you show someone you love them? Just thinking of them and doing little things to surprise them, I think
30. Do you like ice in your drinks? Yep the smaller and more crush friendly the better
31. What are you afraid of? I really do not. like. limb loss. no horror movies for me EVER
32. What is your favourite scent? wet Labrador because it means there’s a WET LABRADOR
33. Do you address older people by their name or surname? surname always unless I’ve always known them by firsts. Religion, man
34. If money was not a factor, how would you live your life? I have this dream of buying up all the land shitty developers snatch up in this country and ceding it back to its rightful owners. I’ve legit cried over little forests turned into parking lots, thanks Joni Mitchell
35. Do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? pools are so clean and have no sharks or jellyfish. that said, they also have no waves...
36. What would you do if you found £50 on the ground? turn it into the store it was closest to. I’m the lawful good box and yes I hate it
37. Have you ever seen a shooting star? YES in Breckenridge one year I saw a fucking meteor shower! I’ve wished on some, they’ve never come true I don’t think.
38. What is the one thing you would want to teach your children? I’m too scared to have children even if I could (I can’t) because of the pressure of what would fuck them up and what wouldn’t
39. If you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it? I love my baby tat @alienfuckeronmain gave me, idk if I’d want another one someday, maybe a sister tat with my sis
40. What can you hear now? The fan, my typing, my parents watching old TV shows
41. Where do you feel the safest? With a pet outside in nature somewhere
42. What is the one thing you want to overcome/conquer? putting limits on things /myself/people
43. Of you could travel back to any era, what would it be? You know I used to really DREAM about this shit, but since I realized I would have genetically DIED in any other era, and that my dreaming was a literal result of white privilege since it would fucking SUCK to be anyone else (I mean even now it’s awful wtf) I just. Stick with the present.
44. What is your most used emoji? the laughing face. oops.
45. Describe yourself using one word. Supercalifragelisticexpialidocious
46. What do you regret the most? I have so many. social. anxiety. nightmares from my 28 years of life that haunt me
47. Last movie you saw? l think it was the Downton Abbey movie?
48. Last tv show you watched? Monk
49. Invent a word and it’s meaning. Surplumn. a really divinely wonderful thing, like ‘oh her lips are surplumn’ like a juicy chocolate mousse and perky breasts idk
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Kells in Prague
So, I was debating whether or not make a personal post about seeing Machine Gun Kelly in Prague. But, after actually seeing the man live, I really felt the need to document it, if not just for you guys, also for myself.
I don’t even really know how to begin... probably with before the concert when I thought I’d be going solo. That was until @echelonwonderland messaged saying I could join her and her friends, which was awesome considering I had never really been to a concert with people who were as much of a fan as I was. We met in the line at around 2pm and began a damn war of attrition (tbh the whole experience was) since there weren’t many toilets close by ( I didn’t pee for almost 10 hours...)
Rook came out to do a little bit of Candy on a barrel before the show (video to follow). He’s as adorable in person as I imagined him; not sure if that’s the look he’s going for but he really fucking is! 😂 We waited outside for 5 hours, our feet were aching, it was freezing by the time 7pm rolled around and we were really fucking bored.
But it was all worth it; by the time the doors opened and we raced inside, we got to the stage and were just one person behind the barrier. We still had 2 hours and 30 mins before the man himself came and before then, we had to be subjected to not one, but TWO supporting acts. I can’t speak for everyone but they weren’t great: the first was a DJ and she started off pretty good but I think most people just wanted Kells by this point. The second supporting act (a Czech band I can’t remember the name of) nearly gave me bloody PTSD; they were pretty heavy and screaming/rapping in Czech. I was at a disadvantage since I didn’t understand the language but I just remember thinking “holy fuck they are so angry.” 🙈 Apparently my face was a picture; this emoticon O_o would be the most accurate I’d say.
Finally the nightmare ended and it was another 30 minutes of waiting. The chanting began, the crowd were getting restless waiting for Kells and I was pretty much shitting myself to see him right in front of me and so close. 9:30 hits and the lights go down and it begins. Kells came out of the elevator like he was God himself and I’ll be honest, he may as well have been. From the moment he began to sing, he captivated everyone. Okay, well, I can’t say everyone but he captivated me. His first 5 minutes on that stage was enough for me to know I had made the right decision to go to Prague to see him live.
I’m not going to lie to you, the first couple of songs were rough; the crowd were wild and pushing and shoving and despite loving the Kells was singing, I wasn’t enjoying getting thrown about like a ragdoll. Luckily, security were really on it and everything calmed down a little. Kells and Slim both stepped in at some point to make sure the mosh pit opened up. (Slim even gave the classic kindergarten count of 1-3: “I’m going to count to three and that mosh pit is going to open up!” I would know, I’m a kindergarten teacher 😂.) After that, it was so much easier to enjoy the concert without worrying about another possible near death experience.
He played nearly everything I was hoping he would ‘Let You Go’, ‘Glass House’, ‘Waste Love’ and ‘I think I’m OKAY’. Of course he played other classics like ‘Rap Devil’ and ‘Till I die’. Everything we would expect from, in my opinion, one of the most versatile artists out there. His stage charisma was perfection and he was totally ON IT with every performance. In true MGK fashion he would pause to light a joint up and then carry on with the next song.
Perhaps one of the highlights of the night was Kells bringing a guy up onto the stage who had a sign that said “I bet I can rap Alpha Omega better than you”. And of course he wouldn’t let anyone think THAT. So they played the song for the first time on tour and to give credit to the dude, he was pretty good and certainly didn’t make a fool of himself. Good on him; I would have dropped dead if he noticed me with a sign🙈. (I have a video of this moment).
Of course I can’t forget Rook’s moment to shine with Kells taking over on drums while Rook sang “Shout at the Devil”. As we all would assume, he did a great job and the crowd lovedddd it.
So I’m going fast forward to the end of the night... and the opening notes of one of my all time favourite songs; 27. I cried guys. And I’m not talking a cute couple of tears, I’m talking ugly, heaving ugly sobs crying. For the most part, it wasn’t picked up on the video but man, I was a mess. I couldn’t have imagined how good it would be live. I’m still struggling to comprehend it.
And that brings me to the conclusion of this post-turned-essay. There is so much more I could write about how amazing Kells was and how I don’t regret seeing him even for one moment. It was worth every second of the 8 hour wait, every blister on my bloody feet, ever muscle ache on my legs and back and of course, almost getting stomped to death on a couple of occasions. (And someone legit flattening me when they threw the guitar picks at the end of the show.)
If anyone is debating if they should go then I would say DO IT. You will not be disappointed. But I will say if you’re not a fan of being squashed for long periods of time, or being thrown about then maybe stay a little back out of the action because it’s tough. People were getting hauled over the barrier from nearly passing out or getting injured so be careful! Especially if you are a younger fan because lorddd your love will be tested with how crazy some people get. If you are close to the barrier then take the water the security guards offer you; it saved me. And my last piece of advice would be buy your merch BEFORE the show because it sold out and I got fuck all. I got a more permanent piece of merch so I wasn’t too upset but it was a bummer.
Yeah... this was only meant to be a couple of paragraphs but here I am writing a ridiculous amount once again. But I cannot condense this, I wanted to tell you all and try and help anyone who is on the fence about maybe trying to snatch up a ticket. It was worth every penny. Thanks to @echelonwonderland and her friend again for inviting me to join them; I know I’ve made friends for life!
E.S.T for life!! ❤️
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Fanfic End of the Year Asks
Well @conduitstreetcat asked for more of the answers, and since I’m procrastinating on the next chapter of In the end, only kindness matters . . . .
Reflectionfavourite fic you wrote this year
And the shadows they burn dark - it was fun to write and I really enjoyed doing it. It also helped how popular it was!
2. least favourite fic you wrote this year
From antiquity- I wouldn’t say it was the least favourite. I would say it’s the one I would go back and write again or fix as I went one way and then abruptly took a turn and I wish I hadn’t been in such a rush to post it.
3. favourite line/scene you wrote this year
The first chapter of And the shadows they burn dark
4. total number of words you wrote this year
Ummm good lord. If I add up all of the new works from this year (not including the ones I wrote with @lavenderandvanilla, I get 36,435. This doesn’t include WIP’s that haven’t been posted to AO3, chapters I’ve added to WIP’s started in 2018 or before, or works I’ve written for work. Not counting work, I am sure that makes about 50k if not more
5. most popular fic this year
And the shadows they burn dark. I still can’t believe it has over 800 kudos. I never thought I’d see such a number, if I’m honest!
6. least popular fic this year
That’s much easier! The little Good Omens baseball fics and the The Pomegranate Rooms
7. longest completed fic you wrote this year
Forever I've Known- which is a collection of short pieces/drabbles/vignettes
8. shortest completed fic you wrote this year
30 before 23, which is one of the little Good Omens baseball fics. It’s only 217 words!
9. longest wip of the year
See number 7
10. shortest wip of the year
The Pomegranate Rooms
11. fandom you enjoyed writing for the most this year
Good Omens, obviously
12. favourite character to write about this year
ummmmm????
13. favourite writing song/artist/album of this year
Uhhhh?????
14. a fic you didn’t expect to write
Hearts Attach- it was meant to be something entirely different!
15. something you learned this year
Well, I guess I learned a lot of things about myself, most of it from fan fiction- if I’m honest. I learned that I am not the person I thought I was, and that there’s quite possibly a real, actual reason I am the way that I am. That it’s not just Anthea being Anthea here, and going all in when she likes something. It looks like this is something a bit more, and I’m trying to make my peace with it. I don’t want to go into details quite yet, as I’ve not really got my head around it all, but it does make things so much more clear for me and well, maybe if I had known this years ago I’d be a different person. Or at least would have been able to say that there is an actual legit reason I act like this. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just desperate.
I’ve been very angry at myself for quite a long time, and I’ve gone from long periods of time of not writing to wanting to delete everything I’ve ever authored to trying out new things. And it’s not always been great. I’ve not always had the feedback (or comments or kudos) I thought I would. And perhaps I said some things, I maybe shouldn’t have said . . . . .
And I’ve had some things said to me as well that were not very nice. I’ve also had some very nice things said to me. It’s been tough, especially with work pressures it’s meant I’ve not been able to write as much as I would have liked, and when I have been able to, I’ve been very hesitant to post or to put my name on things that have been co-authored.
16. fic(s) you completed this year
Hearts Attach, And the shadows they burn dark, Birthday cake, Good times never seemed so good, From antiquity, Reflection, 101 RBIs, Re-evaluate in six weeks, For the love of crêpes, 30 before 23 and In the end, only kindness matters will be done by the end of the year.
17. fics you’ll continue next year
Forever I've Known, possibly One moment in time, but I might move it to Forever I’ve Known, The Pomegranate Rooms
18. current number of wips
3 that have been posted, maybe a few more that have never seen and may never see the light of day
19. any new fics to start next year
I’m sure there will be, but I’ve not thought that far ahead
20. number of comments you haven’t read
0. I read them all and do try my best to reply to them all
21. most memorable comment/review
I recently had a lovely set of comments from someone which really made my day and they encouraged me to continue on, and that was really very kind, especially as it is on a piece I’ve had to set to the side as it was taking a lot out of me emotionally.
22. events you participated in this year
31 days of ineffable advent, Fandom trumps hate with @lavenderandvanilla and the Rupert Graves birthday celebration. I still owe @lavenderandvanilla one for the Mark Gatiss birthday drive
23. fics you wanted to write but didn’t
Occasionally, I might get an idea, and well if I didn’t note it, it’s lost.
24. favourite fic you read this year
Oh, good lord. <insert Aziraphale in the Bastille gif here>
Just to name a few:
The Coffee, Wine, Texbooks verse by @toby-zachary-ziegler
Four Cups of Wine by borealowl
Slow Show by mia_ugly
Secondhand Smoke by PaintedVanilla
Ink Blots and forget me nots by gutsandglitter
And oh so many more. Check out my bookmarks, which I am slowly updating!
25. a fic you read this year you would recommend everyone read
Again, see my bookmarks
26. number of favourites/bookmarks you made this year
A lot!
27. favourite fanfic author of the year
Literally impossible to say, there are so many brilliant authors out there- to say that one is better than another is really unfair IMHO
28. longest fic you read this year
Shit, I’ve no idea.
29. shortest fic you read this year
Again, not a clue
30. favourite fandom to read fic from this year
Duh.
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DISCLAIMER AND RULES
These are the UPDATED directions/guidelines for all who want to participate/contribute to this blog. Our topics of conversation revolve mostly around 30 Seconds to Mars/the Leto Bros, but we have been known to also discuss various other current events around the world.
By reading, and especially by contributing, on what goes on around this blog, you are willingly agreeing with all guidelines and directions I have mentioned below - no exceptions.
I am willing to give a space to those who wish to discuss Mars (or other topics), and I am washing my hands from any and all fuckery that may ensue from other people´s opinions.
Also worth mentioning: I am fully aware that some people who publicly and very vocally denounce any interest in either this blog or Mars gossip lurk around this blog and then spread shit elsewhere on the internet.
By doing that, you are essentially outing yourself as a quiet kmp78 admirer, so to speak.
Or a fangirl, if that suits better. 🤗
Alright then... READ.
1. This blog is laced with sarcasm, jokes, stupid and often very dark humor and PERSONAL OPINIONS - both mine and the people who participate in our conversations. This is not CNN, BBC or even Fox News - this is a personal blog run by a (sort of) fan. Not someone with inside information, and not someone whose opinions and views should be taken too seriously, and definitely not as gospel. I have no direct access to anyone in the Mars organization, and I do not work for them.
2. Nor do I work for YOU. This may be a blog which is mainly used for discussions about all things Mars and all opinions and topics are welcome, but the only one in charge is ME. I decide if a message gets published, if a message gets edited, if a message gets deleted - and if the sender gets blocked.
And not that it really needs to be said, but here goes anyway: I do not work for any Leto troll either.
3. And speaking of blocking:
those who send threats or offensive messages will be blocked, as will anyone who I deem block-worthy. Rest assured, I never block anyone without a reason, so if you should discover that you have been blocked, that means I had a reason. I may or may not inform publicly when a person has been blocked, depends on my mood.
4. Everyone who sends messages is responsible for their own words - I do not accept any blame for other people´s opinions. Misunderstandings by accident or on purpose are not my headache. If I suspect a message will potentially cause unnecessary problems or annoyance for me, I will not post it (or will edit it), and I don´t owe anyone any explanations as to why I´m not posting it. I may explain, or not - that´s up for me to decide.
In any case, as I said: I will not take responsibility for anyone else´s words other than mine, and screaming at me over here or elsewhere online regarding comments someone else made and I posted...
Well, that´s just infantile. 🙄
5. All opinions are welcome, positive AND negative. A positive opinion does not automatically make you a sheep, and a negative opinion does not automatically make you a hater.
Readers to this blog should be adult enough to handle both sides.
6. Calling women sluts or whores is not ok here.
You also need to be able to tell the difference between calling a woman a whore and calling a Leto a whore. If you can´t understand the difference, then get out immediately.
SPECIAL CLAUSE:
the term “YACHT GIRL” when used in connection with an actually legit model who YOU ARE JEALOUS OF BECAUSE SHE GETS TO BONE A MAN YOUR FLABBY LOINS BURN FOR, actually is the equivalent of you calling her a whore, so kindly DO NOT.
Use whatever brain cells your parents genes bestowed upon you and make them at least somewhat proud. That should hopefully partially make up for the disappointment they most probably are already feeling knowing you actually read and participate in this shit.
7. What is also not ok is accusing people of crimes, calling them psychopaths, or threatening others with physical violence etc. - not even sarcastically or as jokes.
Think of it this way:
when typing your message, if at any point you think that what you are writing might come across differently or more seriously to the person reading it than to you while writing it - then do not write it. Any innuendo about people´s potential “social diseases” is not welcome either, and neither are accusations of “obsessions” and people “stalking” the men this blog is focused on. Be VERY careful when using these terms.
YOU are responsible for your own words. I cannot stress that enough.📣
8. We use a lot of initials and nicknames in our conversations - for a reason.
Do not use people´s real names in messages.
If you do not know who a particular person is, please come ask via chat (directions on how to use the chat feature can be found here). I may or may not blur out a name in a message if I think it´s necessary.
9. I post a lot of pics, gifs - and most of them are found from Google using various search terms, and sadly have no tags or indications as to who is the owner/maker. I don´t own any of the pics or gifs, or videos for that matter either (except the ones I have made and labeled as my own). If you find something of yours posted and prefer not to have it up or to have your name added as credits, please let me know and I will remove it.
As for links to either newspaper articles, IG accounts, other blogs or the like: you can find credits to the sources by either clicking on the links, or if I have decided to post screen caps, in the pics themselves. Again, I do not write articles or make videos and very, very rarely post anything other than other people´s comments - after all, this is prominently a discussion blog now. Opinions/messages from other people represent THEIR views and thoughts, my views/thoughts can be seen in my answers (in case of submits or multi-part messages, you will find my contributions to the message after this sign: ***).
To make this very clear: we don´t make news here, we discuss them.
10. When sending submits, if you are unsure of others potentially seeing your “ID”, please mention in your message that you want to remain anon and I will post it anon. Also please remember tho that there is no such thing as complete anonymity - so be careful when writing down your thoughts. Censor yourself if necessary - don´t make problems for me or others, or yourself.
11. I use Statcounter on this blog, which means I can see IP addresses from people visiting this site. However I choose to use that information is up to me, so if you are scared shitless of being outed due to your own actions/words, then DO NOT COME HERE.
If I out your IP, then there is a reason for it.
Don´t give me reasons if you want to remain in the shadows.
(And same goes for chat messages btw: don´t pretend to be my friend in private, but then turn your back and stab me in it in public. More often than not I WILL find out, and if I choose to then out your bullshit by posting private messages, THAT´S ALL YOUR OWN DOING, KIDDOS.
Play nice with me and you have nothing to worry about.
Start kicking dirt in my face and...🤷♀️
12. If you are addressing your message directly to someone (= other than me), please say so CLEARLY in your message, for example by starting your message with “For anon who said...”, or something along those line. I have had it with misunderstandings and unnecessary messes due to unclear messages! BE SPECIFIC!
13. ONLY write either in English or Finnish. I won´t waste my time on Google Translate, I have enough on my plate as it is and your weirdo mongrel lingos are boring as hell anyway.
14. DO NOT SEND MESSAGES WITH THE SOLE PURPOSE OF STIRRING UP SHIT - OR TO INSULT OTHER COUNTRIES OR NATIONALITIES. That would rank quite high the PATHETIC categories...
15. I won´t post content from so-called private/non-celeb accounts such as Leto trolls (= VK for example IS a celeb so whatever she posts is most deffo getting posted, but anything posted by Lesser´s harem probs won´t be).
16. READ PREVIOUS MESSAGES! READ PREVIOUS MESSAGES! READ PREVIOUS MESSAGES! READ PREVIOUS MESSAGES! READ PREVIOUS MESSAGES!
I´m beyoooooooond bored answering the same questions over and over again, sometimes in the space of just a few hours! The archives and search option are available on my blog for a reason! USE THEM. 😠
17. When sending messages containing info or “receipts” or whatever it may be that you think we should be made aware of, either clearly state WHERE that info can be found and WHO you are talking about. Do not simply send a message a´la “VK can be seen on Monica´s/Richard´s/Beatrice´s IG”. We don´t know who these people are! You may, but we don´t! I do not follow a single model or fashion industry creeper on social media so FIRST NAMES mean fuck all to me. GIVE FULL DETAILS OR SHUT THE FUCK UP.
18. IF I SAY A TOPIC IS OFF-LIMITS, THEN YOU WILL RESPECT THAT.
19. I usually try to post messages in the same order they have been sent - with a few exceptions:
If a situation arises which calls for “immediate attention” (new troll pics or other sudden Mars-related activity, for example), I may leave older messages for later and focus on newer ones first. Also when I am operating on my mobile, I am often unable to post certain messages (videos etc.), so those will be left for later when I am back to an actual computer.
20. More often than not, tumblr fails to deliver messages to my inbox. If you suspect that yours has not been delivered, please send it again. I don´t mind getting duplicates.
21. If I feel that a message offers no relevant or needed content, I won´t post it. For example, a message such as “JL & XX in Japan bang bang” is unnecessary and pointless and not worth posting. I only have 250 allowed posts per day, and on busy days I have to make judgments on what is worthy of posting and what is not. I apologize if I therefore have to skip some messages.
When I run out of allowed posts here, I will let everyone know that I am switching over to use the secondary blog which can be found at @kmp78secondaryblog
(PLEASE NOTE: That blog is ONLY used when we run out of room here, and I never go there unless I have to so please don´t send any messages to that blog unless I inform we have to move there!)
AND FINALLY PLEASE REMEMBER:
THIS IS A FANDOM FOR A BAND.
NOT A MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH.
ACT ACCORDINGLY.
Creating hater accounts dedicated to POSTING PICTURES OF MY BLOODY EYEBALL (that btw actually happened because of course it did! This is the echeLOOOOOON after all! 👍) won´t make me quit this blog, so...
Yeah.
Anyway, for further information, please contact me via private message here, on my IGs, or at [email protected].
Thank you. 🙏
PS: In case you run into accounts/comments made under my tumblr “identity”, or otherwise unauthorized “kmp78″ activity outside of tumblr which you recognize as being linked to this blog in any way (such as my posts being tagged with JL´s tags etc.), please report them immediately, both to the admins of the sites you found these accounts on, and to me directly so I can take appropriate action, thanks.
Any of my personal pics taken from this blog have been taken without permission and I have never and will never give permission to post them anywhere. And when I say I “appropriate action”, I mean just that. If need be, I will be contacting the authorities, like I did when I received public death threats.
Be very aware that my tolerance for that is less than zero - and also be aware that these guidelines and my rules may change whenever I feel the need to change them.
#DEAL ✌️
#updated rules#updated regulations#read and learn#think you can?#i don´t have high hopes#dumbfuckchelon
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More Things Than You Ever Cared To Know About My Writing
This was originally posted by ‘vorchagirl’, reblogged by someone I follow. And I thought it would be fun to just outright answer these in a questionnaire type way, rather than as asks. So here we go =)
Feel free to do this yourselves if you like it. Just please remember to add the original poster.
Fanfiction Questions
Fandom Questions
1. What was the first fandom you got involved in?
Properly? Probably Pokemon. I’ve been writing fanfiction for it for years.
2. What is your latest fandom?
Funnily enough, Sonic, despite being a fan since I was like seven years old. I’ve just never seriously got into it since then until now.
3. What is the best fandom you’ve ever been involved in?
The Pokemon fandom. I’ve made some awesome friends in it.
4. Do you regret getting involved in any fandoms?
You hear things, but I’ve not really come across any toxicity besides the reaction to the Sonic Movie.
5. Which fandoms have your written fanfiction for?
A good few, but the only ones you’ll find are Pokemon, Sonic and Zootopia.
6. List your OTP from each fandom you’ve been involved in.
Zootopia - Judy/Nick
Sonic - Shadow/Rouge, Silver/Blaze
Pokemon - I don’t usually ship in Pokemon, but Jessie/James because reasons
7. List your NoTPs from each fandom you’ve been in.
Sonic/Amy. Sorry. Some art is cute, but it’s not my jam.
Shadow/Maria. I don’t ship animals with humans.
I also don’t ship yaoi/yuri pairings.
I do not poop on any ship. If it’s one I’m not fond of, I just scroll on and leave it be. Shipping can be pretty toxic sometimes, and I just don’t get it at all.
8. How did you get involved in your latest fandom?
I was writing Mask Behind the Monster and my husband’s aunt suggested I join a specific Sonic forum to post it in. So I joined the Amino and posted it, all nervous. The reception blew me away, and I met some awesome people, so I stuck around.
9. What are the best things about your current fandom?
The friends I’ve made.
10. Is there a fandom you read fic from but don’t write in?
Probably. Can’t think of any off the top of my head.
Ship Questions for your Current Fandom
11. Who is your current OTP?
Shadow/Rouge. Also Infinite/Amy. This is because of my current writing projects.
12. Who is your current OT3?
None.
13. Any NoTPs?
We’ve been over this *looks up*
14. Go on, who are your BroTPs?
Sonic/Tails =3
15. Is there an obscure ship which you love?
Infinite/Amy. I didn’t initially. But if it’s done right, and there are reasons for them to be together in that setting, then it works.
16. Are their any popular ships in your fandom which you dislike?
Sonic/Shadow, Infinite/Gadget
I’m also not a fan of most Pokemon anime ships.
17. Who was your first OTP and are they still your favourite?
Knuckles/Amy. I still have a soft spot for it.
18. What ship have you written the most about?
Amy/Espio. I went through a phase... Read a couple of ‘fics and thought ‘Why not? Sounds like fun.’ XD
19. Is there a ship which you wished you could get behind, but you just don’t feel them?
Not really. As much as I like shipping, because I’m a fluff-junkie, I have to just like it.
20. Any ships which you surprised yourself by liking?
Again. Inf/Amy. This one took me by surprise.
Author Questions
21. What was the first fanfic you ever wrote?
Erm... if I remember right, Some cringy self-insert Pokemon ‘fic when I was like 14/15.
22. Is there anything you regret writing?
Everything I regret writing has been deleted.
23. Name a fic you’ve written that you’re especially fond of & explain why you like it.
The End and Mask Behind the Monster. I can’t choose one over the other. They were both written with a lot of meaning and emotion behind them, and I have a soft spot for both.
24. What fic do you desperately need to rewrite or edit?
I keep thinking about re-writing The End, but I worry it will lose its fire if I do...
25. What’s your most popular fanfic?
I think... THINK... it’s Mask Behind the Monster.
26. How do you come up with your fanfic titles?
To Title is hard. System:Reboot was a suggestion off a friend who I have lost touch with. Its working title is ‘Hacked’. A lot of my stories have preliminary working titles until I come up with something. The End was named after a song. Confectionary Conundrum was originally called ‘Sugar Snow’ which is the name of the sweet shop in that story. The Mainframe Saga’s Scrivener file is still called ‘Datastream’. Its separate books have been renamed as I’ve been ‘planning’ them out (as much as I plan).
27. What do you hate more: Coming up with titles or writing summaries?
Probably summaries, because FFNet leaves very little space to do so.
28. If someone were to draw a piece of fanart for your story, which story would it be and what would the picture be of?
I have actually had fanart, so this is hard to say. A lot of people like drawing my cyberpunk Infinite redesign which has surprised me.
29. Do you have a beta reader? Why/Why not?
My husband proof-reads my stuff, and then I question him on it. I don’t have a beta. I’ve thought about it, but I stick to a strict time-frame when it comes to uploads where I strictly give myself very little leniency. So if it wasn’t beta’d in time, I’d get a little frustrated and I do not like to pester people. I also worry I’ll be told to edit and cut a LOT, and I don’t like to butcher my ‘fics. I do that enough while I’m writing 8D
30. What inspires you to write?
My faith. That is a BIG one. You will find references and metaphors to my faith throughout my stories. Particularly in The End and The Mask Behind the Monster. Music is another huge inspiration drive. I’ve come up with entire scenes and even plots or sub-plots listening to music. I was just on a walk listening to some cyberpunk tracks when I got the spark for The Mainframe Saga.
31. What’s the nicest thing someone has ever said about your writing?
Oh boy. Where do I start? I think I was especially moved when someone told me they read The Mask Behind the Monster to their sisters.
32. Do you listen to music when you write or does music inspire you? If so, which band or genre of music does it for you?
Yes. A lot. I listen to a variety of stuff from Christian rock and EDM to cyberpunk instrumental tracks. Main bands are Thousand Foot Krutch, Family Force Five, Cruxshadows, Holon, Misanthropix, Scandroid and Celldweller.
33. Do you write oneshots, multi-chapter fics or huuuuuge epics?
It really varies. I lean towards epics. Even Glitched ended up being longer than planned, if memory serves, although it’s not epic length. The Mainframe Saga is made up of chaptered ‘fics, ficlets and one-shots.
34. What’s the word count on your longest fic?
I couldn’t tell you, because Scrivener crashes when I try to get the word count for System:Reboot XD
35. Do you write drabbles? If so, what do you normally write them about?
I don’t, but I have thought about it.
36. What’s your favourite genre to write?
Sci-Fi. Hands down.
37. First person or third person - what do you write in and why?
I prefer third person, particularly restricted third person, because it is easier to write about different characters. That way the reader knows what’s going on when the main cast do not. I was very surprised I enjoyed writing first person so much in Mask Behind the Monster, though. But I did leap into third person a couple of times to give a wider perspective.
38. Do you use established canon characters or do you create OCs?
I love creating OCs. But I will use canon characters in the Sonic fandom.
39. What is you greatest strength as a writer?
From what I’ve been told, character development.
40. What do you struggle the most with in your writing?
Violence. And tragic back stories. I have legit questioned my sanity when coming up with scenes that include this.
Also... when I write fluff... I kind of grind to a halt and struggle through it. Often interspersed with gazing from the window and thinking well further ahead than where I’m currently at. This often results in forgetting dialogue I think up during my garden gazing.
Fanfiction Questions
41. List and link to 5 fanfics you are currently reading:
I won’t post links because it is much too fiddly. But Guiding Light by Ambyssin, Heart Song by Suetonicsonic, Fall From Power by Lordius Dannius.
Hands of Creation by Namohysip, and The Curious and the Shiny by Nebula Dreams. Both of which I seriously need to pick up again.
I believe you can find all of them on FFNet.
42. List and link to 5 fanfiction authors who are amazing:
Same applies as above. Ambyssin, Suetonicsonic, Namohysip, Chibi Pika and Nebula Dreams.
43. Is there anyone in your fandom who really inspires you?
Ambyssin has provided some amazing constructive criticism on System:Reboot which has resulted in me making a terrifying antagonist out of Gadget the Wolf. I strongly hope no other antagonists will develop what I have nicknamed ‘Socket Syndrome’. His drive and commitment to his writing has been pretty inspirational, too.
But in all fairness, I think most, if not all, of my writing friends have been inspirational and very supportive. I offer digital high-fives to each and every one of you.
44. What ship do you feel needs more attention?
I can’t think of any. People should write what they like. And I believe if you want to read it, and it doesn’t exist, then you should write it yourself if you can.
45. What is your all time favourite fanfic?
Guiding Light by Ambyssin. It’s not often I fall in love with a fanfic.
Fall From Power by Lordius Dannius is another.
46. If someone was to read one of your fanfics, which fic would you recommend to them and why?
The End or The Mask Behind the Monster, because they’re pretty special to me.
47. Archive Of Our Own, Fanfiction.net or Tumblr - where do you prefer to post and why?
FFNet. I’ve been posting there for years. I’m iffy on AO3. I’ve considered posting to Tumblr, but my solution to that is to post links and artwork instead.
48. Do you leave reviews when you read fanfiction? Why/Why not?
If I feel I have something to say, I’ll post a review. I like to make sure I do so, though, and I have been known to make notes on my computer and post reviews in bulk to works posted on Serebii.
49. Do you care if people comment/reblog your writing? Why/why not?
I love comments, and I will try to respond to each one. Reblogs are totally welcome!
50. How did you get into reading and/or writing fanfiction?
I’ve been writing for many, many years. Since before I was ten years old. Pokemon likely got me into fanfiction. I can’t remember writing it for anything else prior to that cringy ‘fic I mentioned earlier (which we will never, ever talk about. Ever.)
51. Rant or Gush about one thing you love or hate in the world of fanfiction! Go!
I love the creativity behind it, especially OCs. Pokemon OCs are my favourites, particularly in PMD or Pokecentric settings. Both Sonic and Pokemon offer a lot of inspiration to create OCs as the worlds are both pretty vast. AUs and canon settings both offer massive scope for creativity. It’s seeing peoples’ headcanons and takes on the franchises that I really enjoy. Yes, I do like shipping, but a story does NOT need it to be a good story. It’s the way people tell it that matters more to me.
I know this says ‘one thing’. But I just want to make it clear, the one part of fanfiction I don’t like, is M-rated stuff. And I will not read it. It... bugs me when a ‘fic I’ve been enjoying suddenly changes its rating XD
(I do not own any of the fandoms or characters mentioned in this post) <- Nervous Nelly moment?
#fanfiction#sonic the hedgehog#pokemon#zootopia#writing#this took me a while but it was fun#I hope you enjoy#everyone should do this#we do not ever talk about the cringy pokemon 'fic
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1) Hi Fiona, I’m back for chapter 5!! And I’m so excited because this is such an important chapter. I feel like I should warn you, this may get long. I have so many thoughts about everything that happens here lol. So before I actually get into each scene of this chapter can I just say that I love how you did this breakup?? Because you’ve shown us that they truly do love each other so the fact that he’s cheating on her is a shock.
2) But at the same time you’ve shown us enough cracks in their relationship (Steph, the glasses thing) that it’s not unbelievable or completely out of character. In some ways, even though he’s an asshole and I’m not condoning it at all, it’s kind of understandable. I mean from Sam’s perspective, even though Taylor wasn’t cheating on him and never would, things looked pretty damning. She spends a lot of her spare time with him,
3) he himself has been witness to countless times of Harry flirting with Taylor and she generally flirts back, it’s pretty clear that Harry has deep feelings for her (it seems as if pretty much everyone has picked up on it), there have been numerous times when Harry has stayed over at Taylor’s apartment sleeping in her bed even though he lives right next door. So, whether he actually thought anything was going on with them or if he just figured that’s where things were headed,
4) he reacted by deciding to cheat on her first. Was that in anyway ok?? No, of course not. He’s an asshole. Did Taylor deserve this because there were maybe a few times where she and Harry were a bit too close? Definitely not. As was said earlier in the story, she’s as loyal as a wolf. But what I’m trying to say, and what makes you such a wonderful writer Fiona, is that even if his actions were horrible and wrong and in no way excusable, his motivations were understandable.
5) Alright, now that I’ve got all that out of the way I can actually talk about the chapter! Firstly, let me just say I love the way you’d throw in little references to dates and months so we can kind of get a feel for the timeline of the story. And here, we know that things go wrong with Sam and Taylor in September. I love that the first scene doesn’t immediately break them up but instead we, and Harry, get a little taster of what’s about to come.
6) I’m not actually sure what happens between Taylor and Sam in the first scene. I assume he ends up cancelling on date night which leads to a big fight?? That could possible be a callback to the moment in the first chapter where Sam cancels plans with Taylor which results in her having dinner with Harry. It doesn’t really matter either way because whatever happened, it results in Taylor in tears at Harry’s apartment. Harry of course comforts her.
7) And while things may be happening beneath the surface with them Taylor makes it clear that she is not ready for nor does she want a break up. And while things do go back to normal, it’s only for a short while because then the inevitable happens. I’ve already shared my thoughts on the actual breakup and I don’t want to repeat myself so I’ll just say that I loved that Harry didn’t wait too long to go check on her. She will need some space but she also just needs a hug.
8) Also I love how you made it clear that while Harry may have feelings for Taylor and he may’ve flirted with her, he didn’t want it to result in Taylor getting hurt. Also from the way you’ve described this apartment building, the walls are so thin everyone must just know everyone’s business lol. I love that Harry stays the night with her just to make sure she’s ok. In his perfect world, him waking up with her would be different but at least he can be there to comfort her.
9) The little details that we get about how Taylor is dealing with the break up are so well done too. She’s constantly listening to sad music and she dyed her hair. Classic. I mean I love and hate that you referenced #bleachella. Love because it’s realistic, hate because it reminds me of bleachella. The scene where they tried to get her to go out only ending in Taylor crying and throwing up is so relatable. We’ve all been there.
10) Both as the heartbroken one, and as the friend who has to look after the heartbroken one. But most importantly Harry sticks around through it all. I love, love, love the karaoke bar scene. It’s possibly even better than the first one. The start of the scene is amazing. So much of that sexual tension I love. And Harry’s even flirtier now that she’s properly single. And once they get to the bar things get tense and awkward because SAM SHOWS UP!! THIS IS THE KIND OF DRAMA I LIVE FOR!!
11) When Taylor went over to him I was getting ready for a smackdown but instead we got the best thing ever when she performs the perfect Alanis Morissette song. And Harry is so impressed (and a little bit turned on) and he isn’t even trying to hide it. Also, he’s a douche, but shoutout to Sam for not only staying through Taylor’s song but Harry’s as well where he basically sings about wanting to fuck Taylor lol.
12) I somewhat wish we could’ve had a Harry/Sam smackdown because I live for that kind of drama it probably would’ve been over the top. Also love the little hint at the end that although she may have had a good night, it didn’t mean she was suddenly completely over the breakup. The scene at Harry’s work was cute too. Jared is still (somewhat forcefully) rooting for him and Taylor. But Mallory actually talks some sense. It’s good that Harry hasn’t made a move on her.
13) It’s way too soon for her to be jumping into any other kind of relationship and harry understands that. He also gets to reinforce to his friends, and the readers, that he wants a hell of a lot more from Taylor than just sex. And immediately after that we’re brought to another scene of harry getting himself off while Taylor’s in the shower next door. Irony is a funny thing. Anyway, it leads to a lovely little scene between harry and taylor that is SO full of sexual tension and flirting.
14) Honestly, I think hanging out with the both of them would be awful considering how much sexual tension they have. In this scene, we also get to know their plans for halloween. I love the conversation they have about why they Taylor feels nervous about going to the halloween party. She might slowly be getting over Sam but she’s not ready to be with anyone else yet which is totally fair and it’s good for Harry to know.
15) Also the conversation about masturbation was ace (not to be a perv but a scene where harry overheard her masturbating would’ve been very funny after all the times he heard her with Sam). We get a little flicker of harry’s past as well which I’m looking forward to reading about properly when it happens. Harry and taylor deciding to go the party together is super cute especially because they go in matching costumes!! Which sound amazing btw! The party was so good too!
16) (Ignore my other message, I fixed it) So many nice moments between Harry and Taylor. Especially when he told her that she didn’t need to dress up super sexy to look good. The moment when Taylor sees Sam for the first time is awful. I feel so bad for her. But Harry follows her and says all the right things without ever lying to her. Also the fact that it didn’t take Harry that long to cheer her up shows that she’s definitely not as hurt as she was a month ago.
17) I’m not gonna lie though I would’ve totally loved if they just went full fake-dating au and started like grinding and making out on the dance floor to piss Sam off. It would’ve ruined your amazing slow burn though. Also this line: “Sam didn’t try to call them out, thank god. That was an interaction none of them were interested in having,” I would’ve very much loved this happening but I’m a dramatic ho lol.
18) Loved Taylor and Harry getting progressively more flirty and touchy as the night went along and I really loved the stuff at the very end of the chapter. Just like the very last dialogue. She’s talking about how hot he looks, and calling him charming and the flirting between them is in full force! But then she puts a damper on things by telling him he should find a nice girl for himself.
19) Because while Taylor may not be ready for anything yet it must really hurt for Harry to think that she hasn’t at all considered the possibility of the two of them together. And I mean, she probably has, but from Harry’s perspective it’s really gotta suck that they can spend so much time together, flirt for the majority of it, talk about such deep things, and she still might not get that there’s something more there.
20) Ok, so this is by far the biggest one I’ve done yet. This is probably gonna be like 30 asks rip but I had a lot to say about this chapter. Seriously, this story is so good Fiona. Can’t wait for chapter 6.
oh my gosh this is so long!!! I'm living okay let's go
I didn't immediately have a plan for the break up when I started writing but I knew I had to have a legit reason for their relationship to end since for the beginning half of the story, she's privately thinking she doesn't want to leave a good relationship and end up ruining one of her best friendships, just to end up alone in the end. she really does love sam but harry's confusing and maybe she's not in love with sam as much as she thought she was. while she never completely crossed the line with harry, I wanted to make it believable that sam would think that she either had or would eventually. it was kind of like a well how do you like it when I do it to you thing, which is super petty and gross and she always deserved better ajdkd I'm SO relieved that I actually made it all flow the way I wanted to because I was worried it wasn't going to make proper sense
whenever I write long things like this I always write a timeline so I don't get confused with what happens when and in which chapter (plus I colour code it so I know what I've finished so far which is satisfying!) and I throw specifics in so you reading have a sense of it as well. I feel like any specifics, rather than just being vague all the time, make it sound like I know more what I'm talking about which is always nice!
I had to go back and read the start of this chapter just to make sure but yeah I think that's basically what I was going for! I didn't go into details since she didn't want to talk about it so harry wouldn't know, and the story is centred on him. but I love the messy aftermath omg okay I had to throw bleachella in, it was a look™ and the aesthetic fit perfectly for this part! that second karaoke scene is one of my favourite parts of the entire fic, it was so much fun to write and whenever I listen to either of the songs they sing I still think about it. it was exactly the kind of drama I wanted, she publicly shamed sam in front of a bunch of their friends meanwhile harry is just #thirsty. I thought about doing more between harry/sam but nothing really seemed natural enough for it to work
I ended up reading the rest of this chapter and honestly I'm living!! I'd forgotten how much I enjoyed writing this fic and how flirty they are. it flows so naturally between them, especially during the halloween party when they're loosened up (and sparkly – I'd forgotten their costumes!). even so, I think she was just afraid of losing him as a friend, since he meant a lot to her and she didn't want him to end up as just another one of the guys who loved and left her. and lbr...... she probably did think about him when she was ~alone~ but was more careful about being heard sjdksk
#this is so long i love this#sorry @ everyone who isn't interested ahdjdj#formatting is ruined for asks i don't think i can even throw these under a read more#anyways i loved going back to read this chapter so thank you!!!#anonymous#answered
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okay well, today was wild in so many senses of the term, but I’m also so dead tired so we’ll see how this goes. basically I failed to go to sleep last night, like at all. no sleep. I took two benadryl around 2:30 am and it did nothing, which is very strange. but once it was like, properly morning I messaged Jess and we had to wait for the vegetarian place to open at 9 so we walked in the door at like 9:01 legit lol. our usual waitress thought all of this was nuts, and then we had to explain the coffee thing with Jess to her and that was even more nuts lol. but we got our usuals, while I was eating my scone I had one of those weird esophagus spasms I get when I’m trying to swallow something but it just stops moving and I’m just repeatedly making the swallowing motion and it’s not moving, so I basically just have to drink a lot of water and try to make it move while not choking in the process....I managed and was fine, but my stomach did feel kind of off for a while afterwards. It was also hot AF out, and Jess had to go back to her apartment to wait for her roommate’s package from Korea that needed to be signed for and was going to be delivered some time in the time frame between 10 am and 8 pm, lol. So I went home and unsurprisingly took a nap until like 2:45 when I woke up again. at that point I ate some cocoa krispies because I just bought some of those again, then tackled all the dishes in the sink that I got dirty during my cooking yesterday, it wasn’t a huge huge pile but I’d rather get to it before it gets there. then I got on my computer and was doing some shit when I got a notification that my ebay package had been delivered, which was the Courtney Ford heroes and villains fan fest banner they were auctioning off and our group chat at the time decided we needed it and I’m excellent at winning ebay auctions so I got it. I messaged Jess telling her it was here, which made her like, bolt over immediately which up to that point she was like “it’s too hot I don’t want to move” so that was some motivation at least. When she got here we took it out and it’s so fucking big lol we don’t even know what we’re gonna do with it. Of course this all had to go on twitter and tag Courtney in it, who thought it was fucking hilarious. after we’d calmed down a bit we walked to the mexican place on main street and I got the same exact thing as I did last time that was very good. I had another episode of esophagus spasming but survived this one too thankfully. Once we were finished with dinner we returned to our respective apartments, I spent a while laying on the floor with an ice pack under my back and trying not to fall asleep on the floor, but managed to get up and then was on my computer when there were some uh, other developments I’m not going to share in full detail right now but trust me it’ll be worth hearing about when the time comes. Eventually I figured I should get some work done, so I spent a little over two hours on the brief, finishing up the second issue. Very typical for me, I’m very concerned it’s not going to be long enough, since it’s currently 12 1/2 pages with one issue left to write and the limit is 15. I do understand 15 is the limit, not the must hit, but if it’s a fair amount less than that I’m gonna feel like I did a crappy job. It’s just a weird case because there are a lot of errors in the judge’s opinion but they’re all technical in nature, so it’s hard to build an argument other than “they did this, this rule says they can’t do that, so you should overturn the decision.” but we’ll see, hopefully I can work on it for a good chunk of time tomorrow and finish it up, then have Monday and part of Tuesday to really clean it up and make it pretty before I submit it either Tuesday night or Wednesday morning before I leave for SDCC. Once I finished up for the night I was on my computer for a bit before showering and starting to get ready for bed and now I’m here, it’s past 1 am and did I mention I’m really fucking tired? so yeah, going to bed now. Goodnight peeps. Hope you had an awesome Saturday.
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100 things I want to do in my lifetime
So, I had a really good conversation today with friends, and I opened up briefly about my stay in a psych ward a few years ago. It came up because I am acutely aware that I haven't been doing well, and am scared to return to a situation anything like my previous stay at said ward despite knowing that being hospitalized would probably be very beneficial at this time in my life. Talking about it did make me remember something though, something that gave me a lot of hope. While my experience with a psych ward was overwhelmingly negative, there was a part of treatment that really got through to me at the time. It especially helped with my suicidal ideation, which is something that's been really problematic for me again lately. Since I remembered it, I'm going to revisit the exercise, and I encourage anyone and everyone who also struggles with suicidal thoughts, thoughts of self harm, mental health issues, or even if you're just having a bad day, to give this a try. It's simple. Make a list of 100 things you want to do in your life. They can be as realistic or unrealistic as you want them to be. They can be big, long-term goals, or small, silly goals, and everything in between. The only rules are to write 100 things, and to avoid sarcastic or pessimistic things like saying one of your goals is to die or something like that. Save the list! Then someday you can go back and cross off things that you've accomplished or edit as you see necessary. Without further ado, here is my list:
1. I want to get my name legally changed to Larkspur Emmett so my dead name is no more
2. I want to get top surgery
3. I want to rekindle relationships within my family, especially with my cousins
4. I want to get scuba certified
5. I want to dive over the "sunken island" location on the lake my family had a cabin on that I visited frequently while growing up
6. I want to go diving in general, seeing a coral reef in person is an especially huge dream of mine
7. I want to rekindle my knowledge of the Spanish language and eventually become fluent
8. I want to continue learning American Sign Language
9. I want to learn more about my ancestry; I know I'm a vast mix of probably mostly European blood, but my family comes from so many different places and I'd like to know more about them
10. I want to finish the art commission I started for my close friend
11. I want to travel to places like Costa Rica, Japan, Chile, and Australia
12. I want to go on exotic travel adventures with a future romantic partner or close friend
13. I want to get my Bachelor's degree
14. I want to earn enough money to live comfortably, probably with pets
15. I want to adopt a pembroke welsh corgi
16. I want to beat my eating disorder(s) for good and be able to stop taking medication to help if at all possible
17. I want to go ziplining
18. I want to go skydiving
19. I want to hike through the Monteverde biological cloud forest reserve in Costa Rica
20. I want to develop a drag persona and perform as my persona on a regular basis
21. I want to make a fursuit (yes I said it, fite me)
22. I want to finish an entire animated music video
23. I want to learn more about plants and successfully keep one alive for longer than a year
24. I want to try my hand at raising an ant colony
25. I want to go swimming more often
26. I want to learn more martial arts
27. I want to learn to be a leader in my community
28. I want to work harder in my college classes
29. I want to learn to not fear loneliness and abandonment, and to appreciate my alone time
30. I want to get (many) more self-designed tattoos
31. I want to continue learning how to appreciate my body without caring about other people's opinions on what is considered "attractive"
32. I want to eat more whole foods both because they're healthy for me and taste far better than anything with chemicals in it
33. I want to meet a few famous people in person, can't think of many off the top of my head though, but I know there are a couple
34. I want to take dance classes again
35. I want to learn how to play a musical instrument (I mean, I took 7 years of piano and can kinda read music, but I wanna learn an instrument that's better suited for short fingers lolol, maybe french horn?)
36. I want to finish the paintings I've started
37. I want to learn how to digitally render things realistically
38. I want to finish the fanfiction piece I started a couple years ago
39. I want to become more patient and less envious
40. I want to heccing fly, okay?
41. I want to feel like relaxation is deserved and expected, and not a luxury only for those who can afford it
42. I want to reassemble an animal skeleton
43. I want to dig up a fossil (specifically of some sort of mesozoic creature, that'd be so cool)
44. I want to get back to using my planner
45. I want to play more (board, card, video, etc.) games with my friends
46. I want to disassociate less and be present in the real world more often
47. I want to be more informed about what is going on both in general, but especially in my more immediate environment
48. I want to take up better drawing habits (more life drawing, warm ups, breaks, etc.)
49. I want to try a real goddamn piña colada, bonus points if it's on the beach
50. I want to try existing in a portable living situation, like a renovated bus or van, for a while
51. I want to learn basic wilderness survival skills
52. I want to learn how to identify many different species of all types of organisms, especially plants and animals
53. I want to get my vehicle fixed up nice and maybe hand paint some things on it
54. I want to learn more about different cultures because they're fascinating and I want to be as respectful of all people as I possibly can be
55. I want to paint the waterfall jungle mural of my dreams in my future house
56. I want to gain better control of my emotions and my responses to them
57. I want to fabricate a working pair of wings for human beings
58. I want to learn/do more embroidery
59. I want to get a cerulean blue Corvette stingray
60. I want to get better about not procrastinating
61. I want to go to more events/be more involved wherever I am
62. I want to go for more walks to places I haven't been to before, bonus points if it's in the middle of the night and/or in the rain
63. I want to do things like play in inflatable obstacle courses and ride on roller coasters without caring about whether other people judge me for doing those things as an adult
64. I want to regain the physical strength I have lost from being sedentary while my mental health has been at its lowest
65. I want to spend more time laying in the sunshine, preferably with the bare minimum of clothes on because I enjoy the warmth on my skin
66. I want to cuddle more with others that feel comfortable enough to participate in that with me
67. I want to learn more about the fabrication of clothing and design/make some outfits for myself
68. I want to cosplay, maybe go to a convention sometime
69. I want to go skinny dipping >:3 (look, it's number 69 on the list, okay?)
70. I want to try all sorts of foods I've never had before
71. I want to see a butterfly leaving its cocoon in real life again
72. I want to read more of the books I own
73. I want to be kissed by someone again...it's been over 4 years...
74. I want to eliminate my habit of requiring a Youtube gaming playlist to be playing in order for me to fall asleep
75. I want to learn more about the history of the lgbtqia2s+ community
76. I want to learn how to cook for myself better, and like, actually use those skills on a regular basis
77. I want to learn how to take care of my vehicle better on my own, like how to change a tire and such
78. I want to learn to communicate better, and just, in general how to be the best friend I can be
79. I want to stop using all substances for the purpose of drowning out my surroundings and messing with my temporal senses, if I'm going to drink/smoke/get high/whatever, I want it to be because I want to for fun, not because I want the chemicals to take the edge off my mental illness(es)
80. I want to start taking better care of my dental hygiene
81. I want to learn more about my legal rights and finances and other "adult" stuff that doesn't really get taught to you unless you specifically go looking for it
82. You know the somewhat obnoxious game Bop It? Yeah, I want one of those again, keeps me entertained for a long time
83. I want to design more things in general, more characters and their outfits and personalities and the worlds they live in, I enjoy that
84. I want to spend more time outdoors with my friends, watch sunsets and collect miscellaneous objects from the universe and such
85. I want to teach someone something, sit down and maybe teach someone how I draw or about something that I am at least somewhat knowledgeable about
86. I want to go to more aquariums; if/when I travel more I want to go to every aquarium I come across
87. I want to start a legit collection of something and like, build it up over a long period of time so it gets pretty impressive
88. I want to get my eyes surgically corrected so I don't have to wear glasses or fiddle with contacts
89. I want to learn more about Greek and Latin roots and just words and symbolism in general
90. I want to lose the embarrassment I have about my hyperfixations because I deserve to not feel ashamed of the things that bring me satisfaction and joy, and it's okay if other people don't share my enthusiasm about such things, I just want to learn to not be embarrassed that I like stuff
91. I want to get over my fears/discomfort re: nudity, especially for life drawing classes; see, it's one thing to see someone nude and divert my eyes but for life drawing I'm kinda forced to look...
92. I want to understand myself better and learn to love me instead of the opposite; I want to be full of love for the beautiful people around me and I want to really solidify in my brain that I am one of those beautiful people
93. I want to do more things for others that are meaningful because that makes me happy, and I want to learn to do those things while also respecting everyone's, including my own, boundaries
94. I want to develop a sleep schedule that is healthy and appropriate, and that I'm able to maintain
95. I want to run in the rain more often and jump in puddles (edit: while typing this it started storming out and I had to run outside in my bunny pajama short-shorts, winter boots, and a sweatshirt, to grab my box of silly plant seed experiments before they blew away, so progress is already being made)
96. I want to get over my intense fear of making phone calls
97. I want to learn how to sing better with my new and improved deeper voice from being on Testosterone
98. I want to get my first tattoo fixed up and hopefully renew the meaning it had to me at the time that I got it -- I want to try to keep that promise
99. I want to spend more time actively working on improving my mental health
100. I want to see more, I want to learn more, I want to do more, I want to be the version of myself that is genuinely amazed and curious by all manner of things, and I know that part of me is still there
And now, once you've finished your list, you have 100 reasons to not give up, because there's no way of knowing what you're capable of doing if you don't exist to try.
#long post#for future reference#silver writes#mental health things#but positive#100 things i want to do#i'll add a keep reading thing later#can't figure out how to do that on mobile
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I turned 30 and got my tubes tied
Just shy of a week ago I had my very first surgery — I got my tubes tied. Although, “getting your tubes tied” is sort of an out-of-date term these days come to find. Nowadays, removing your entire fallopian tubes is the standard for a couple of reasons: removing them completely (as opposed to tying, clamping or cauterizing) can prevent the occurrence of an ectopic pregnancy and can reduce the risk for Ovarian Cancer. Dude, I have so much cancer in my family, if I can reduce my risk for one kind, I’m down.
I’m really glad I’ve never had surgery before because going into it blindly was probably the best thing for me. I had no idea what to expect and if I had I think I would have been even more of an anxious mess than I already was. I am the queaziest, most fainty human being on the planet, so the entire experience of having the 3 attempts to put my IV in was a little hellish. But being put under felt pretty cool and before I knew it, I was waking up and it was all over. It took a solid 3 days of doing nothing but laying on my back and hobbling to the toilet before I started to feel like a human again. And let me tell you — having a boyfriend with an amazing sense of humor kind of sucks when laughing causes you pain. But he took the best care of me and 6 days later I’ve got a way less bloated and swollen tummy (looked like I was pregnant for a couple days) and my insides feel like normal again. I’ve got these 3 sweet battle wound scars — two on either side of my lower abdomen and one in my belly button — and I can officially say that I’m sterile as a cotton ball.
I’m pretty excited that I now have a response when people inevitably ask “So when are you and Jonah going to have a baby?” I’m going to enjoy it a little too much to be able to say, “Never actually. I had my tubes tied.” Telling people you don’t want kids makes them incredibly uncomfortable for some reason. I’ve never really understood it, but one of two things usually happen. One: they get real awkward and change the subject, never to be visited again. Or two: the barrage of questions begins. Some people are genuinely interested. Some people feel the same way and I get high fives. Some people do the whole, “well, you’ve got plenty of time to change your mind” routine.
The thing that probably kills me the most though is when people ask why.
“Why don’t you want to have kids? If you don’t mind my asking,” they’ll say.
You got a few hours? People ask this question like its a simple answer. Dude, if its a simple answer, I highly recommend that you don’t get sterilized because one simple answer isn’t sufficient. I have scores of reasons! And the reasons why I don’t only stand to inform the actions I would take if I oddly changed my mind someday.
I thought I’d share some of my many reasons with you all. Some are emotional, some are physical, some are financial — they’re all over the place. If you don’t care — thats cool. If you think I’m stupid — you’re entitled to your opinion. But I do think it would broaden your vision a bit to read why someone might not want to reproduce. If you’re one of the people judging me, I encourage you to take a moment to learn about someone different than yourself.
1. Physically, I legit can’t handle it. I know every woman is probably terrified of actually giving birth, but I literally could not handle it. I have to lay down to get a flu shot, and stay laying down for a solid 10 minutes or I’ll pass out. Getting my blood drawn makes me faint every time. And just discussing the process of inserting a NuvaRing with my gyno made me lightheaded and have to lay down. Getting my lady exam every year makes me so nervous I often present with high blood pressure because my nerves get the better of me so badly. Don’t think I could handle 9 months of discomfort, thinking about whats happening to my insides, and then the inevitable pain of actual birth. And even if I somehow could handle it — I don’t want to put myself through that. No thanks, I’ll pass.
2. Financially, I don’t want the burden. People may think thats a cold reason to not want kids, but I’m just being honest. I’m a fucking millennial for god’s sake — I’ll be drowning in student loan debt until the day I die, paying off only the interest on my income based repayment plan each month. I’m just now at 30 years old feeling stable with my own income for the first time ever. And to be 100% honest with you, I want to spend my money on me and my partner, not a small person who doesn’t even understand what money is and how hard I have to work for it. If you can look past that — high five to you, but I can admit that I’m not that big of a person.
3. I don’t want the strain on my body. I’m not special in that I’ve struggled with my body image my whole life. And sure — you can argue all you want that having kids is more rewarding than having a hot bod. And I’m sure thats true for some people. But vainly, I just don’t want to ruin my body like that. I’ve got enough stretch marks on my inner thighs and love handles from when I was heavier. I shall opt for keeping my bladder and vagina and breasts in tact for as long as I can. #SorryNotSorry
4. It’s not what I want my day to day life to be about. I enjoy being around kids of a certain age for a very short amount of time, and somehow that window gets smaller and smaller as they get older. I don’t have enough time for myself, I can’t even imagine having every moment be about feeding and changing and crying and being sick and everything else. Worrying about myself and the people I love is all I have the energy and time for folks. Its wonderful that some people are happy having every day be about play dates and going to the park and doing whatever Mommy-and-Me crap you mothers out there do — but thats just not who I am. I enjoy traveling and seeing the world, experiencing art and theater and music, trying really hard and failing at making alone time for myself, falling in love with Jonah more and more every day, searching for a woman to fall in love with at the same time, and a million other things I could spend hours writing about. In everything I want for my life, there just isn’t a kid running around in that mix.
5. I’ve got some weird Mom-related reasons swirling around in my noggin, too. My relationship with my mother was very special to me. I was an only child raised by a single mom and that, my friends, creates bonds unlike any other. In the three years since she’s died, I’ve realized how sacred my time with her was. I even had a window of time where I thought I was going to cancel getting my tubes tied because I had this morbid realization that by having a baby, and possibly a little girl, I could have a piece of my mom back again. Thats not a healthy way to think. I talked my feelings out with my loved ones and ended up back at my decision to have the procedure. Somehow, the mother-daughter relationship that I had with her is the only one I want to have in my life.
6. Other areas in my life deserve my love and attention more than a child. First and foremost — my love life is too important to me. Jonah is my world. And aside from the fact that on our first date he told me he didn’t want to have any more kids (he has a daughter from a previous relationship), our life doesn’t have room for an infant. Our life together — my career, my company, other creative and business ventures I have brewing in my head, Jonah’s music, our love life being polyamorous — all of these things deserve my love and attention more than having a baby. And guess what? As mentioned above, I already get to have a daughter in a sense! I get to have this super cool friendship/stepmom/parent-type thing with a wonderful little girl that came from the man of my dreams. I can’t wait to see her blossom into a young woman and see what she’ll achieve in life. ALSO, I have an amazing nephew who is about the same age and even though I don’t get to see him every day the way his mom saw me every day, I love the bond I have with him and getting to see him grow into such a sweet and upstanding young man. All of this and more deserve my love and attention more than creating another human.
7. I don’t think its necessary to populate the world with more people. If I lose anyone big time with any of these reasons, I think this one might be it. We as human beings are literally ruining this planet. There are too many people in existence as it is. We’re polluting the ocean at an alarming rate, global warming is all our fucking fault, and every year more and more animals hit that endangered species list or worse, become extinct. Don’t get me started on animal rights! More people just create more garbage, more waste, more problems. I’m sure you love your big family and think you’re not part of the problem, but guess what — we all are. I don’t want to add to it. I can help not add to it by the following...
8. I would choose adoption over reproducing any fucking day. When I had my initial doctors appointment to schedule my tubal ligation, my doctor obviously asked me why I wanted the procedure done. I rambled off a few of these reasons I’ve just shared with you and closed with this: “If for some crazy reason I want nothing more than to have a child 10 years from now, I would want to adopt anyway.” And that was the end of that conversation. There are so many children that need foster homes or to be adopted. In Minnesota alone, an article from this past January from Kare 11 states that “this year alone some 17,000 children will need temporary, out-of-home placements.” I saw an adorable little boy at the grocery store the other day running in front of his parents. For one second I thought, there are I don’t even know how many little boys just like him that need homes across the globe. The thought broke my heart. If I wake up 5 years from now and want nothing more than to be a mom, I want to change someone’s life and give them the loving home they otherwise might not ever have.
9. I’ve never had a strong will to be a mother. Sure, when you’re in grade school you might trade future baby names with your girlfriends at recess. For me it was Hayden for a boy and Aslynn for a girl. But as a teenager and adult, that daydream disappeared. I’ve never longed to be a mother, or to have any sort of a conventional life for that matter. It’s always seemed really boring and expected and normal. One of the very very few positive things that came out of my relationship with my ex-husband was the day he helped me realize that I just assumed I’d have kids someday because thats what society had drilled into me. The moment I stood back and really honestly asked myself, “Do I want kids?” I had my answer. No. And I’ve never looked back.
10. Most importantly, my body was made for more than reproduction. I know we don’t live in medieval times — this isn’t Game of Thrones no matter how much I wish it was. We live in an age of being a career mom and female empowerment up the wazoo. But theres still this thing floating around out there in the world that its expected of me to reproduce. Ridiculous abortion laws like the one that just passed in Georgia that makes it illegal to get an abortion after 6 weeks makes me feel like we’re only glimpsing the tip of the iceberg of whats coming down the pipes. The only person who can control what I do with my body is me goddamn it. My female body can do just as much (AND MORE) than any male body can. Maybe its just me being stubborn or thinking I’m more important than I am, but I firmly believe my body can do a million more important things shit out children. I truly believe we are heading to a Handmaid’s Tale existence, and I won’t be a part of it. I refuse.
I didn’t write this blog to make you feel like shit if you are a mother, and enjoy being a mother. Everyone is different. I respect that. But we all have different perspectives. And I truly believe that there are a lot of moms out there that didn’t think long and hard enough about this life-changing decision, and now they’re stuck with it for life. At the end of the day — you’re going to do you, and I’m going to do me. But maybe you have a little insight into what goes on in a head like mine, and why motherhood doesn’t have to be your future if you don’t want it to be.
I’ll be honest with you — I sort of have this weird feeling that for once I have total control over my own body. Pregnancy has been this fear stamped on my love life since I took that dive at 14 and I finally feel free from it. I don’t know, maybe I’m blowing it out of proportion. I could be feeling that way because I just bought my first house and have this cool, new perspective on taking control of my life. But somehow, I’ve never felt more in control in 👏🏻 my 👏🏻 life 👏🏻
Watch out world. The only one in control of my life and my body is me.
#tubes tied#tubal ligation#30 years old#my body#my body my choice#millennial#handmaids tale#sterilization#pregnancy#having kids#having a baby#mothers#daughters#mothers and daughters
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Wynonna Earp 1x06 Constant Cravings
Spoilers disclaimer (please read before sending messages or writing comments.)
Stray thoughts
1) Dolls training with Wynonna is Buffy/Giles 2.0. But less father-daughtery and more UST. Also, I love that she’s a huge dork.
2) 😊
DOLLS: Good job.
WYNONNA: You think I don't listen, but I do.
DOLLS: Yeah, you've limbered up.
So, they’ve been going at it, it wasn’t a one-time thing! But it’s definitely a secret thing, and well, you know, in the words of the Admiral Moneybags Logan Echolls…
3) I’m sorry, dude, but you hear growling noises and you stop to take and look and say “hello” instead of running? You had it coming.
4) Don’t you dare mess with my Doc, Bobo!
Did the Stone Witch really skip town or is he covering for her?
Also, do ALL the characters in this show have UST or is it just me?
5) I knew he was going to get this dude for laughing at Doc’s joke.
Stone Witch is the reason Bobo has these powers, right?
6) Doc does not disappoint, apparently…
7) That is a loner…
Blacksmith is not fucking around. And she’s hot af.
8) Oooh, and she has some type of psychic abilities! I like that! I thought Dolls was just in pain because Wynonna had whupped his ass, but apparently, there’s something else going on?
9) I like her more and more with each episode.
10) Why is Waverly still dating Champ? The sex can’t be that good!
CHAMP: How can somebody so pretty be so smart, huh?
WAVERLY: Because they're not mutually exclusive.
The worst thing is he actually believes he’s giving her a compliment.
11) This has to mean something, right?
12) I legit laughed out loud at her reaction! She shoved Waverly to the ground!
13) Oh, Wynonna, I also fell for it…
So, I was mistaken, they clearly haven’t been forking like rabbits, they hadn’t even seen each other since they had crazy hot, toe-curling, out-of-body, back-into-body, angels-singing-Hallelujah sex. But Wyonna clearly wants a second round, and I can’t blame her.
Did I tell you that I ship them. SO. HARD?
14) Wait, is Dolls going through some type of withdrawals? Is that why his hands were shaking?
15) Doc knows something’s up with Dolls…
Or he wants to fork Dolls, it could go either way.
16) Yeah… this doesn’t look like the “totally organic operation” Waverly described…
17) Yeah, Wynonna is not really a long-term planning gal…
I get it, but I think this type of reckless decisions is going to come back and bite her in the ass.
18) Doc’s trying to go undercover, but let’s be real, everyone’s going to recognize that beautiful bearded face of his…
19) “You ain’t so hot, you know”
20) Cannibal revenants. Cool. Because they really needed to be even more disgusting.
21) Ay, Dolls keeps staring at Wynonna and they keep having these SEXUAL TENSION moments and on the one hand, I’m like, NOPE because DOC, but on the other hand, Dolls and Wynonna could be potentially very interesting together and they definitely have chemistry, but on the third hand, I don’t trust any show to do love triangles well? So yeah, I’m super torn about this whole thing!
22) That’s what happens when you question Doc’s hotness, okay?
23) I feel Waverly is always going to be the MVP because she’s so darn smart and resourceful, and I’m here for it.
24) WTF was going on here! Is this some sort of Normal Bates situation?
25) If you needed any further evidence that Champ is an idiot…
We could open a little bar down in, um, Buenos Aires.
(I live in Buenos Aires province, and everyone wants to leave…)
26) WTF UNCLE CURTIS!
What sort of parting gift is this?!
27) Keeper of the Bones? What does that mean?
Waverly, darling, you are now the Keeper of the Bones. Guard this and tell no one but the Blacksmith. You're the only one I can trust. Love, Uncle Curtis. All I know is that Waverly has probably become 100% more valuable. And a much bigger target for the revenants, considering what happened to Uncle Curtis, the last Keeper of the Bones…
28) Classy.
At least it helped Waverly break things off with him, so there’s that.
29) So, Hetty is a revenant…
And the matriarch of the family is the cannibal who probably had her children getting her meals.
There’s something else I got from this conversation, though. Hetty seemed to be sincerely sorry for tricking Wynonna and for helping Olive get her Happy Meal with legs. It’s a small moment, but it continues to build on the theme of the previous episode, in which Wynonna started to learn that she can’t see all revenants under the same light. Not all revenants are completely evil, it seems. Some of them show remorse, and some of them even try to lead normal lives. I really dig this.
30) So they need to do some kind of ritual to make her the Keeper?
31) Wait! That’s the skull of the Stone Witch’s son? That means it’s one of the missing parts of the two skeletons she and Bobo have been trying to put back together right? Waverly is in fucking danger, isn’t she? Yep, she just said it herself.
32) “I got a hollow place in my belly that needs to be fed.”
33) See? It’s not all black and white when it comes to revenants…
HETTY: I just got caught in the crossfire and became this. I didn't choose it and it's not fair.
WYNONNA: Believe me, I get that.
HETTY: I just want to live like a girl. Buy lip-gloss, wear flirty skirts
34) Oddly enough, I relate to this lady on a spiritual level. Well, minus the cannibalism.
35) She said Dolls is spoiled! What does that mean??? It’s the drugs that he’s been taking, right? But why? Why does he need them?
36) Oh, wtf, Hetty, you were one of the seven?
I had my suspicions once it was revealed her mom used to dress her as a boy, right down to the tattoo on the neck. But I was hoping she wasn’t one of them. She wanted a normal life, and I guess she was willing to do whatever it took to get it.
37) Yeah, this does not bode well for Wynonna...
38) !!!!!!!!
39) What the actual fuck is he on?
I wonder if this storyline will be something like Riley and the Initiative. Is he on drugs to be more efficient, stronger, more powerful? Has the government got him hooked on this thing?
More importantly, this addiction makes me wonder if he is someone who can be trusted. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Wynonna sincerely confessed she trusted him when she was talking to Doc right before we saw him do this. I don’t know what his motives are to be here, you know? Like, is he really trying to exterminate the revenants or is he after them for something else?
I can’t wait to find out!
40) Hope you enjoyed my recap, and, as usual, if you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi.Thanks!
#Wynonna Earp#Waverly Earp#Doc Holliday#Melanie Scrofano#Tim Rozon#WE recap#WE 1x06#mine#MTVSwatches
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What, in your opinion, was the worst tvd season and why?
Season 8 because nothing made sense and it was BORING. From previous posts and highlights from all of my reviews of the eighth season:
I would say that in the season finale a lot of things didn’t make sense. Why was Elena in a big white bed in the middle of the woods? Where is this place, why are they there? How did Enzo know to find Bonnie there and how did he bring her back to life? Is Enzo God? Stefan didn’t know Bonnie would be able to wake Elena up but he still gave Damon the cure in the off-chance that she would? Katherine pretended to be Elena, she wore Elena’s dress in the casket but had the time to dress Elena in her own clothes and put her in the school? And her hair was straight and suddenly it just became perfectly curly again? Stefan was shot and stabbed, he bled everywhere in those instances but he managed to not age rapidly but because he took a syringe of blood and gave it to Damon suddenly Damon has the cure and Stefan would start aging? Really? He could’ve called Caroline or saw Caroline, there is actually no reason why Stefan could see Elena, it’s not a logical part of the episode in terms of plot or lore, it doesn’t make sense, except that Elena had to be the last person he saw before he died.
8x01
22. Writers, it’s too fucking late for the whole “surrounded by death, Stefan That’s what we’ve been for a hundred and some years.” nonono, you didn’t stick to that vampire lore throughout the seasons, it makes no sense to reinstate it now. In True Blood, from season 1 to season 7, it’s iterated and reiterated that vampires are death and whoever wants to sleep with them or be around them wants to die because they’re surrounding themselves with death. That isn’t a theme in TVD.
23. Nope, you can’t do hell all over again and try to back it up by going “not stone hell but real hell!” nah, y’all were lazy and just did the same shit again.
26. Stefan and Bonnie coming face to face with Damon and Enzo should’ve probably been more impactful? Like I don’t know, I don’t get the sense of complete and utter hopelessness. DO some fight club shit:
Make them gaunt and pale and red-eyed, like if they’re drones or slaves then make them as such. Because Damon is just acting like Damon, the only reason why we know he’s doing these things against his will is because of the over-exposition in the dialogue, there is actually nothing to indicate that Damon is doing this against his will other than the repetition in the words.
33. How hard are they going to hammer this shit in our heads? Damon doesn’t believe in redemption AGAIN, Damon thinks he and Elena are on different paths AGAIN only so SURPRISE he’ll be proved wrong by Elena near the end! Been there, done that.
8x03:
6. I love how it’s become such a big deal that Sybil has mind control. “We’re dealing with something that has the power of mind control” SCARY MUSIC. Right because vampires compelling people was just ….
15. Damon describing Sybil’s hold over him is literally describing compulsion.
17. So Sybil is Rebekah and the Salvatore Mansion is the library and instead of Elena, Caroline and Stefan talking about SE and DE it’s Caroline and Bonnie talking about Damon and Enzo.
18. OK so Sybil is also Klaus who has to “Siren” obedience like how Klaus had to Sire hybrids.
19. OK so Sybil is Klaus again making Bonnie choose between Enzo and Damon like Klaus going, “So Elena, Jenna or Stefan?” Or she’s No Humanity Caroline who essentially did the same thing with Matt and Tyler. ‘Bout the most sadistic game imaginable, writers you’ve recycled this at least three times.
32. “Bonnie, I’m going to count down from 10 and then I’m going to let Damon finish what he started.” Like the clock Klaus put on Stefan biting Elena? LOL OK TVD.
8x03:
28. So basically when Sybil got Damon’s full devotion is exactly like when Damon and Elena thought Stefan betrayed them for Klaus and the scene between Caroline and Stefan when Stefan is all “Damon is gone” “Don’t give up hope” is Stefan and Damon “Stefan is gone!” “Then we’ll let him go.” We’re redoing season 3 just terribly.
8x04
35. So a black man is the devil. EXCELLENT, TVD. JFC.
36. Also their version of the devil makes absolutely no sense. Why is Cade in hell in the first place when he literally did nothing wrong? Did he create hell for the souls that he keeps and why is he collecting souls in the first place? And they keep mentioning God, as in the Christian God, so how are you going to have a Christian God but not a Christian Hell? WHAT?
44. So Georgie goes to hell because she killed a girl in a car accident. OK so like I don’t get it does that mean Julian is in hell too? What about Mary-Louise and Nora? Are they in hell? WHO goes to this hell? Does just everyone who does a bad thing go to this hell?
8x05:
9. You know why banging a tuning fork doesn’t come across as torture? Because it’s a weak fucking form of torture. At least have Sybil’s ears bleed, have her crying with pain, have her clutching her head, screaming STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT. Like OMG.
10. And of course Bonnie isn’t at Tyler’s funeral but so is no one else. It’s true that the Lockwoods are dead but they’re a founding family, you mean this town won’t mourn the loss of the last living member of such a family when the town is supposed to be big on tradition?
11. This episode is ridiculous. I won’t believe that Stefan wouldn’t be fast enough to stake Damon in the leg or to push him off Matt, Stefan vamp-sped and pushed Damon off Bonnie in season 1, he pushed Katherine off Jeremy in season 2. After being the only human in MF for how long, Matt should’ve picked up a few tricks on how to take down a vampire. Caroline is also a vampire with a history of beating the shit out of Damon, you mean two vampires can’t contain one? Whatever.
15. “It was awful, like Damon is desperate for us all to hate him.” But you just can’t right? For absolutely no fucking reason. I’m actually getting severely tired of Damon killing everyone, abusing everyone, making everyone’s lives worse and the show constantly protecting him with lines that distance him from taking any responsibility. It’s OK that Damon killed Tyler because he wants you all to hate him? Are you fucking serious?
20. REDEMPTIVE RIGHT NOW. Hammering it into our heads that he didn’t want to kill Tyler but he did it for Sybil, he doesn’t like that his friends hate him but he made them hate him anyway for Sybil (although legit no one looks like they hate him) and I’m fucking OVER it. Damon kills but his heart isn’t in it, so the fuck what, why the fuck do I care about that? Doesn’t MEAN anything.
21. Dude, I thought that Sybil inserted herself in Damon’s happy Elena place and then I thought she made Elena die so it was like Damon never met her. What was the point of Sybil inserting herself in Damon’s Elena Happy Place if he just does things to make her happy but doesn’t put his heart in it, he was doing that anyway before.
8x06
5. So we get to see mediocre SC sex in 8x01 but we don’t get to see mediocre BE sex in 8x06? Oh true. I see you, Julie and co.
9. WHO eats bacon that way? Seriously, who the fuck eats bacon that way? That’s not sexy, it’s weird.
13. This writing is ridiculous. You and Sybil aren’t Cade’s missionaries, Seline, you aren’t converting people to your ways or “spreading the word”, you’re eating their flesh and giving the souls to Cade, you’re his butchers.
27. “Two of history’s most prolific killers.” LOL WHAT? People have committed GENOCIDES, TVD.
30. “I raised them” they’re THREE. And on the real, it didn’t look like or feel like you were dying when the twins were gone, Caroline.
33. “I gave Damon what he promised me an eternity of misery” HOW THO? Damon’s BEEN spending his immortal life killing people, like how is it any different that he and Stefan are doing it for a purpose now? Jfc. Also legit, guys, y’all are immortal, vampires, you’re never going to hell, the paranoia surrounding this place is ridiculous especially since they have both died as vampires and haven’t gone to Cade’s hell dimension each time.
35. Lmao why is this ending with Alaric killing Damon as if Damon is actually dead? We know he isn’t! Stefan just told us they’ll live forever serving Cade and we already know he and Sybil crash Steroline’s Christmas. LIKE? THIS ISN’T SHOCKING.
8x07:
13. “If Elena was here Damon wouldn’t be doing any of this?” Are we forgetting that he systematically killed Whitmores while they were together, that he kidnapped her brother and had Enzo suffocate him, that he killed Aaron … that a lot of the destruction Damon caused to the group was in Elena’s name? Damon didn’t change for Elena, I need the show to let that one GO.
15. There is weird tension between Caroline and Damon and it makes me uncomfortable.
18. “I know there is a future you that’s going to ask for my forgiveness one day” like when he asked for forgiveness for raping and physically and emotionally abusing you, Caroline? Oh right, that never happened.
23. Cade is basically Klaus trying to get Stefan go Dark Side. THIS IS THE EXACT CONVERSATION HE HAD WITH KLAUS.
8x08:
5. I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY NO ONE IS TRYING TO FIND LOOPHOLES AGAINST CADE. Caroline is just “cool, Stefan, go and be evil with the devil” WHAT?
15. It’s really annoying and in bad taste that the show is discussing how the Founding Families didn’t found Mystic Falls because other people were there first (witches) and we’re just ignoring the fact that there would’ve been Indigenous nations. I also like how we’re talking about history but we wouldn’t talk about enslavement even though MF is in fucking Virginia.
22. Are we really fucking doing this? Matt’s dad is angry at the Founding families because they were rich and ran the town while his family were skilled traders and looked down upon as such when Bonnie’s fucking ancestor was enslaved to Katherine??? WHEN THERE WERE ENSLAVED PEOPLES IN THIS TOWN? Matt’s dad gets a rant but we’re not talking about the racist history? Why am I even surprised by this?
8x09:
17. Oh my GOD, we’re only 20 minutes in?
20. Why are we acting like Damon’s humanity will crush him? He was fine with killing Lexi, turning Vicki, killing Jeremy, killing Aaron, kidnapping Jeremy, trying to kill Caroline, raping and abusing Caroline, etc. Like why wouldn’t he be fine with this? Elena won’t care.
21. Why do they keep saying Matt is stupid? How is Alaric any smarter? A fucking siren was his nanny for months.
8x11:
1. So I don’t remember if this is from 8x09 or 8x10 when Sybil explains that opening the door from Cade’s world into this world will destroy everyone in this world but that is literally Buffy season 5. Glory is a hell goddess who wants the key back into her dimension but if the key (who is Buffy’s sister) opens her world then the dimensions will bleed together and reality will cease to exist. LIKE??? Does Julie even know what an original thought is?
11. “Look at Damon, humanity on and he’s a new person!” HE IS EXACTLY THE SAME. DAMON ALWAYS REMAINS EXACTLY THE SAME. MAGNUM IS THE SAME LOOK AS BLUE STEEL. OH MY FUCKING GOD.
13. So Matt can say that it’s still Stefan who tried to get him to destroy the entire town but he can say that Damon turning and effectively killing Vicki is a long time ago, him murdering Tyler wasn’t him. OK true. Not transparent at all TVD.
18. Why is Damon giving him pancakes and not blood? Is Stefan not a vampire? Is he drying Stefan out? What’s the point of this?
21. Oh my God, I am literally only 10 minutes in.
38. 21 minutes and 41 seconds.
42. Talking talking talking talking
43. This is the final season though?
52. I don’t care for Bonenzo but seriously Julie taking away Bonnie’s happiness at every turn is a blatant hatred of her character, I don’t give a shit if she says she gets an unexpected happy ending, the unexpected happy ending will probably be her and Enzo reunited in death or something.
8x13:
1. Seriously, Cade seems like a really petty devil though. “Kill 100 people or your brother’s girl” like … why? Don’t you have some world domination plans going on or…? Like why the interest in Stefan and Damon, what about either of them are particularly special to the devil? It doesn’t make sense to me. At least with Supernatural, everything from season 1 was leading up to Dean and Sam being vessels for Michael and Lucifer, like every season, every plot point fed into that so it made sense, this is just fucking random.
2. I’m legit taking this opportunity to tell people to watch Goblin because it is so much more intriguing than whatever the hell TVD has become. You can watch it on: Drama Fever, Box Asian, Drama 4 U Viki, like so many sites, guys. I mean, I’m just saying, if you want a show that’ll make you cry and keep you in suspense and make you fall in love with characters then that’s it.
5. “Stefan, thank God” sound even less enthused, Caroline.
9. “I don’t think this is just colonial bling” did they seriously make Dorian say that? UGH. Also who says bling anymore? Are we in the early 00s?
11. Why is Damon acting like he didn’t kill Tyler? I find this actually unbelievably fascinating. He can stand there and lecture Caroline about how Bonnie wouldn’t answer her calls when he killed Tyler who was supposed to be Caroline’s first love and her childhood friend? LIKE THIS WRITING.
12. I don’t understand this, Stefan is human so he can’t be immortal anymore and therefore is out of the contract so Cade will kill him? Can’t he just make Stefan an immortal human? Like why does he have to be a vampire? He can kill people without biting them, there’s always good old fashioned weaponry. Like what powers does Cade actually have?
20. Like there are no side effects to turning human? You’re just human and that’s it. You don’t feel slower, weaker, you can just operate normally?
25. Lol Caroline and Stefan are so bad at being together.
31. “Sirened to ring the bell” it’s just compulsion.
40. And seriously he’s not even going to STAY with her? The supposed love of her life died and no one is going to just BE with her? Remember when I said she would grieve alone?
8x14:
2. I think it’s funny that Cade is talking about how Damon is in limbo, “the space between spaces” because my guy, that is JUST the Other Side.
3. No, see, the entire plot line with Cade and the Salvatores irritates me because it’s so conveniently linked to Damon and Stefan. He is the devil or the devil’s right hand man (since Katherine is the Queen of Hell for some reason, right?) I don’t understand why he can’t just find the weapon himself or get someone else to do it for him, there’s no reason that it has to be Damon and it’s the problem when a villain keeps making threats “Or I’ll drag you back to hell”, so then do it. At least with Supernatural when Zachariah wanted Dean to do something and Dean was like nah, Zachariah was like OK so what if I give Sam stage 4 stomach cancer? Or hey, how about if I take away his lungs? And we see him inflict these tortures on Sam while Dean watches. Or Dean starts off the season coming out of hell and we get flashbacks to what hell was like for him and we find out how much it fucked him up so when Uriel and Castiel threaten to throw him back into hell, it’s an actual real threat because we’ve seen the effects and why he would be scared. This whole thing with Damon is like … every time Cade says he’ll send Damon to hell I’m like motherfucker, no you’re not or you would’ve DONE did it by now, stop.
5. Bonnie being able to see Enzo is like Jeremy being able to see Bonnie and Elena hallucinating Damon. I’m bored.
14. Also where are the twins if neither she nor Alaric are watching them in this scene? Like if they’re setting shit on fire because of temper tantrums and are literally prone to blowing each other up now, I would be around them all the time.
17. I like how Stefan has, like, an actual plan to kill Cade but if you’re going to kill him, will you not slash his arm and punch him and make witty remarks, can you just stab him?
18. Because you see what happens, Alaric’s cell phone rings and he stops ringing the all important bell.
24. *SPOILERS FOR OUTLANDER* So there’s this show/book called Outlander about many things but at the centre of it, there’s a love story between Jamie and Claire and throughout the series, Jamie makes these declarations of love to Claire and says he’ll do anything for her, that he’ll be her shield, he’ll die for her etc. and there’s this villain called Jack Randall who is a sexual sadist and he has a particular interest in Jamie who he nearly flogged to death years earlier, basically Randall gets a hold of Claire and is going to kill her in front of Jamie so Jamie offers up his body to Randall in exchange for Claire’s safety and in that scene Randall nails Jamie’s hand to a table and kisses him while Claire has to watch and then Claire is forced to leave Randall and Jamie alone and in the next part we basically see the rape and torture that Randall inflicts on Jamie over and over. A lot of people had issues with that and asked the author why she felt the need to show the brutal rape of Jamie and her response was this:
“So, OK. Throughout the book, we’ve seen that love has a real cost. Jamie and Claire have built a relationship through honest struggle, a relationship that’s _worth_ what it’s cost them. This is the final challenge, and Jamie’s willing to pay what will apparently be the ultimate cost.
Why would I throw that away? To have him escape rape and torture (he–and we–_know_ what’s coming) by the skin of his teeth would be to undercut his sacrifice, to make it of little moment. (It would be like someone turning up in Gethsemane and telling Christ, “Hey, buddy, you don’t _really_ have to do this. Come with me, I got a secret way outta here…”)”
And this is what TVD fails to do with DE. It’s one thing for Damon to be willing to go to hell for both Stefan and Elena but Bonnie shows up and actually saves him from having to undergo that threat and it undercuts his sacrifice because he didn’t actually have to sacrifice anything, he just had to be willing and it’s not impactful. So I’m not even a little moved by what Damon did because he didn’t do anything first of all, second of all after everything he’s done throughout 8 seasons why wouldn’t he choose himself, I mean, it’s the least he can do.
25. “Bonnie, wake up”, Stefan can you check her pulse?
26. “That little psychic blast must’ve blew me into my body” that literally makes no sense.
27. Damon and Stefan sitting on Damon’s car, drinking is basically just Sam and Dean. Stop it.
29. “Someone who can create a safe, supportive and loving space for kids … someone like you” is that Caroline, though? I’m sorry but she doesn’t seem like any of those things to Josie and Lizzie, she’s shrill and just tells them to stop doing things, like I don’t know why she didn’t actually ask Josie and Lizzie how they felt when their magic was going haywire, like we don’t actually see her BE with them, she just scolds.
33. Finally, what anons kept asking me about, Katherine Pierce being the Queen of hell. I am going to admit something, I think the show and the characters gas Katherine way too much, she isn’t the baddest bitch of all, I don’t think the characters are toast because she’s running hell, I don’t even think she deserves to run Hell, she’s petty, it’s not like she has master plans that completely destroy lives, she just makes things inconvenient for the core group like *ugh* I mean I guess I gotta go fix Elena because she has venom in her system, like what were the major consequences of what she did in 5x15 to Elena? Elena didn’t see Damon for an entire episode and couldn’t sleep with him immediately. Getting Jenna to stab herself was rude but the major consequence of that is Stefan and Elena breaking up. She outted the Klaroline sex and it just fractured an already fractured relationship with Tyler. The worst thing she did was cause Jeremy’s death and that wasn’t even intentional, it was just like oh well … yeah, my bad, bye. Like she’s a mean girl on steroids, that’s kind of it, she isn’t like this Badass Villain that no one can top and OMG SHE RUNS HELL. I mean Rebekah caused just as much damage as Katherine did because they’re both petty.
8x15:
2. I like how opening the door to Cade’s world will only destroy everything for “miles”, like that’s such a small scale, shouldn’t it be the end of the world if the devil is walking among us? Or is he not the devil, is Katherine the devil? I’m confused about the Hell hierarchy, you see.
5. Sorry, pausing because my cat is being extremely affectionate and I would rather play with her for a little than watch what trash this episode is going to be.
6. But now she’s on my keyboard. It’s like she’s trying to spare me.
14. “That was a lifetime ago, things have changed since then” that should just replace the title of TVD. “Didn’t Damon kill your sister?” “That was a long time ago.” “Didn’t Damon kill your brother” “That was a long time ago.” And now apparently abandoning your family because of man pain and cowardice and immaturity is “a lifetime ago” too but oh no, Stefan was a ripper a literal century ago and we need to harp on it forever.
16. Why would Dorian agreeing to help them on how to get rid of the “Queen of Hell” be misconstrued as him being “cool” with Stefan though? Isn’t getting rid of someone who is supposed to be the devil Plus be in everyone’s best interest? Like whatever, it was just another chance to take a shot at Stefan. Transparent as fuck.
21. I mean, I don’t blame Bonnie for hating Stefan but Damon was responsible for killing Jeremy and kidnapping Jeremy, Enzo was responsible for suffocating Jeremy and she’s cool with both of them, hell she fell in love with one of them so I’m just like girl, I guess. The writers are ridiculous because it just feels like they don’t know the web they’ve created with these characters and understand that they’ve turned pretty much everyone into a hyprocrite.
24. I don’t even know why Damon needs to tell Stefan that what happened to Enzo will haunt him like Stefan isn’t new to guilt. Why are they making it seem like this is Stefan’s first rodeo?
37. “I hope I get to see this one day with you and Elena” lol the FLATTEST delivery ever. Like do you even mean it? Do you REALLY? Think hard, Stefan.
54. LMFAO SO WHO ISN’T IN HELL? Vicki was in hell, Kelly was in hell, so like ERRBODY GOES TO HELL THEN? WHAT CRITERIA IS THERE? Like if I run a stop light do I go to hell because it’s against the law? What if I jaywalk or accidentally step on an ant or something? BECAUSE SERIOUSLY.
55. STEFAN WHY DON’T YOU EVER CHECK ANYONE’S PULSE?
and you already saw my thoughts on 8x16
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