#kirigan one shot | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kasagia · 1 year

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I'll be back for you

Pairing: Aleksander Morozova/General Kirigan/The Darkling x reader, Kaz Brekker x reader Summary: The Moon Summoner ran away with Alina from the Little Palace with the help of Kaz Brekker's crows. The group successfully escaped from Darkling's hands, but that doesn't mean he will forget about his Y/N. He's going to chase her until she is in his arms again. However, Mr. Brekker did not let his childhood friend disappear without a trace from his life again. He will protect her. For all costs. After all, she was his newest investment. Warning(s): Darkling, Kaz fights haphephobia (but not as severe for him ), reader argues with Baghra, reader has internal moral conflict, curses, fights, and their red aftermath, I used a quote from TVD and The Invisible Life of Addie Laurie because… they fit and I love them veeery much It's my first one-shot for both Darkling and Kaz, so please be gentle (I'm very nervous and excited at the same time to publish it) <3 Word count: 14k (too long, someone should take me away from the keyboard in the middle of this)

~•♤♤♤•~ Part 2 (end) ~•♤♤♤•~

Every night since you escaped with Alina and Genya with the help of your childhood friend Kaz and his crows from Ravka, you've been haunted by nightmares. No. Not the usual horrible flashbacks of your past in Ketterdam or the Little Palace.

HE visited you.

The Darkling. The Black Heretic. The man who promised to keep your heart safe and broke it in two along with your trust.

Genya has a right to warn you about powerful men. But you, the lost girl kidnapped by slave hunters from Ketterdam, the girl who has nothing to lose and was happy enough to somehow end up in the general's tent and find out about being one of the most powerful Grisha, didn't want to listen to her.

You foolishly believed that you, of all people, were able to charm the most dangerous man in all Ravka with your beauty, character and mind.

You believed that sweet words, longing glances and tender moments between you were real, that they meant something.

But it was all just a game. A game that brought him your affection and blind trust. And Kirigan, Darkling, or Alexander played in it like mastermind.

You should have listened to Genya. At least those damn dark eyes wouldn't haunt you every time you closed yours.

With the taste in men you have, you should have predicted that the first guy you hooked up with would be a psychopath. Fate could only be a little bit more favorable to you and not connect you to the hundreds-year-old black heretic who created the fold.

You've always had a weakness for villains and gray characters.

Your first teenage crush only proved it.

Because who else but you would fall in love with a bastard boy from the barrel who started his criminal career with the Dregs, who couldn't stand the touch of other people, and who wanted nothing more in his life than revenge on Pekka Rollins?

If I survive this shit, I really should find someone normal to be with.

You thought before you somehow managed to fall asleep for the first time in a month, hoping that your bond with the Darkling would weaken for those few hours when you tried to find peace.

~•♤♤♤•~

It was pure darkness around you. Not that one when all the lights went out and it's only you and your bed. No. They felt too familiar for you to confuse them with anything else. Those were his shadows.

He must have been near, playing with you as he always had.

You carefully took one step forward. The shadows parted in front of you, so you could see the ground. You bent down to your boot and pulled out a dagger, hiding it behind the sleeve of your blouse. You had to be ready for anything. Even if it meant fighting the shadow lord himself in your own subconscious. You sighed, stepping uncertainly into the darkness.

Your eyes quickly adjusted to the place around you, allowing you to move faster along the path. You recognized this bloody spot. The path in the woods you raced down when he took you for your first ride. Then he dragged you to HIS fountain, telling you nonsense about how it's only here among other Grishas that you discover your true self. He was already weaving his manipulative web around you, and you fell into it like an oblivious fly.

The snap of a twig stopped you. You looked around, not seeing anything at all except for the fountain in the distance. You flinched as his shadows gently pushed you forward.

"I'm not going to play another of your games, General!" you screamed as you spun around, walking forward. If he was already disturbing you, at least he might have had the honor to step out of the shadows.

"Call me Aleksander…"

You shivered as you felt his soft whisper against your neck. You spun, summoning your light and shooting into the space behind you. Unfortunately, it didn't encounter any Black Heretics on its way.

You huffed angrily, continuing your walk until you reached the fountain.

It was different than when he brought you here last time. The engravings have changed. They no longer told the story of the Black Heretic who created the fold. They were of you and Aleksander. Slowly falling in love.

"The union of darkness and his light." you felt your body tremble as the fabric of his kefta brushed your hand.

"I would never have taken you for such a sentimental fool." you turned to face him, taking a step back to increase the distance between you. With a very smug smirk, you noticed that he had dark circles under his eyes. Good. At least the son of a bitch suffers as much as you do. "Especially not after what Baghra had told me."

"My mother has the amazingly irritating gift of ruining my plans. She also doesn't like the people I care about much."

"Hmm… what a pity. Maybe if you weren't planning to use us as weapons in your plans, I'd care more. Also, don't try to tell me that there are people in this world who are more important to you than yourself. We both know I'm not going to fall for it again."

"I understand your resentment." you laughed, shaking your head in disbelief as you turned your gaze back to the fountain. "What's so funny?" you relished every irritated word directed at you. Maybe you couldn't seriously hurt him physically, but at least you could be a pain in his ass.

"I just forgot how easy it is for you to choose words that both tell the truth and work in your favor. Please, continue. I didn't truly laugh for a very long time."

"You're making a mistake." he stood next to you, grabbing your arm to turn you toward him.

You yanked your arm out of his grip as soon as your powers met in that familiar dance of dark and light. You both sighed, stunned by the sudden combination of your powers coursing through your veins. You opened your eyes, which you closed in the flow of the moment, meeting his tender, longing gaze. The man reached out to cup your cheek, but you pulled away from him before your skin had a chance to touch again.

"Funny. That's what I heard from your mother before she made me realize what shit I got into."

"One conversation with my mother, and you're ready to give it all up? Just because she was faster than me? Because she revealed a truth about me that she had no right to? What if I wanted to tell you right after I dealt with the group that wanted to attack you and Miss Starkov?" the grudge in his eyes only fueled your anger. He had no right to resent you for running away from him at the earliest opportunity when he had been hiding this important piece of his past for so long.

"What does it matter, general? None of it was real anyway." you growled, turning your back on him again so as not to reveal your hidden emotions to him. You didn't want him to know that you still cared. Indifference was a worse punishment for him than your wrath.

"So c'mon. Prove your point. Turn around, look me in the eyes, and tell me that you didn't feel anything towards me for even the slightest moment."

You wanted. You really did. To look directly into his soul-black eyes and say that he meant as much to you as the dust under your shoes. However, you both knew very well that it would be just a poor lie. And you both knew each other well enough to know when the other was lying.

"Just because my foolish heart longs for something, it doesn't mean I'll give in to its stupid desires. Wasn't you the one who told me that wanting makes us weak?"

"You should know I've changed my mind by now." the sound of leaves crunching under his boots was the only warning you got before you felt his presence behind you. "You. You are changing my mind."

"Don't tell me I have any influence over you. It's a poor play. You can do better, Kirigan."

"You and I may change the world, Y/N…" you flinched as you heard the exact same words he said here so many months ago. You turned to face him when you felt the coldness of one of his shadows wrapping around your leg. You pointed your dagger at the man standing only one, little step away from you. He didn't seem affected at all as you pointed the dagger at him. He didn't even look at it. His eyes were only on yours. "You may not see it now, too blinded by your righteous, but not entirely fair, anger at me, but deep down, you know that we are destined for greater things than others. You, me, and Alina together can be the strongest creatures in the world."

"You know very well that we never wanted to live like this. Neither of us."

"Do you? Alina maybe doesn't want to be the Saint, but you, Y/N?" you took a step back and another as the black heretic approached you with his every word. He stood in front of you, letting the dagger you were holding in your trembling hands touch his chest. He smiled almost mockingly, seeing that your weapon against him was exactly the same one he gave you on your birthday, provoking your anger again. To spite him, you summoned wispy beams of white light that began to radiate from your hand to chase away his shadows.

"You don't know what I want." you growled, pressing the dagger harder against his heart to remind him that you were in control here. He could sneak into your dreams, but at night you were the most powerful Grisha in this bloody world. And even he had to reckon with your power.

"Yet I still see a desire in your eyes." you shifted your gaze to him, watching him silently and with hostility as his face was illuminated only by your powers. You were disgusted to find that, despite his betrayal, he was still equally handsome to you. "Not only for me but also for my power. You, my little moonlight, you want to be just like me. Strong, powerful, and ageless." he raised his hand deftly, dodging your dagger, and, under your watchful gaze, brushed a strand of hair behind your ear, stroking your cheek as he did so. He took a step towards you, causing you to press the blade against his neck as he got close enough to whisper in your ear. "You can run as far as you want, but you don't run from the truth that's inside you. And when you finally understand what you really want, I'll be there for you, waiting with open arms for my saint moon."

"Have fun waiting for this day, Morozova." you whispered, not giving in to his piercing gaze.

"I am a very patient man, after a thousand years on this earth, you will be too, Y/L/N."

"I'm not you, Aleksander. I don't wanna live forever, and I'm not gonna. I won't see the only people I truly love and care about die before me. Even eternity and unimaginable power are not worth it."

"They're still people you love and who can share this fate with you. Who will live long enough to be with you forever." one of his shadows began to wrap around your hand, forcing you to remove the dagger from his neck.

He leaned closer to you and rested his forehead against yours. You sighed, shivering as the scent of his familiar perfume enveloped you after so many weeks apart. You were tempted to give in to him again. And that dark desire in your heart terrified you more than the capabilities of the Black Heretic caressing your cheek.

"This isn't love. It was just a game. We were just playing a game. The same one you created a long time ago to earn my trust. But I'm no longer that naive girl who is desperate for somebody's attention and love. You made me stronger, crueler, ruthless. And believe me, general, I'll repay you for all you have done."

"You don't believe that. You can't have believed my mother that I am your villain so easily." in other circumstances, where your heart wasn't beating for his, you'd probably laugh at the desperation in his voice. But now that every fiber of you longed for the man before you, there was only one thing you could do.

"Then tell me, Aleksander..." you leaned in to him, rubbing his nose with yours as he closed his eyes and waited for your lips to finally touch after weeks of craving your slightest touch. "Why was I so tempted to do this?" you dug into his tempting mouth, giving you both what you needed.

In your head, you explained this crime against your friends as wanting to do what was originally intended to be your primary goal. The gentle prolongation of your longing, amazing, desperate kiss before you plunged the dagger into his side without the slightest hesitation wasn't your fault at all. Aleksander moaned into your lips, pulling away from you as he felt blood trickle down his side.

"Leave me alone, or I will make myself your villain." you whispered into his mouth before you somehow managed to get yourself out of your "dream".

~•♤♤♤•~

"Y/N?" Alina's soft whisper wakes you up. You opened your eyes, feeling how your chest was burning for fresh air and your heart beating faster than it should. The woman was sitting next to you, holding your hand.

In the corner of your eye, you can see Nina standing in the doorway of the room Kaz graciously assigned to you after you arrived in Ketterdam. You can swear on saints that Inej was looking through your window before she went - probably going to tell Kaz about your fourth nightmare this week.

And it was only Tuesday.

You felt attacked from all sides. If not Inej through the window, then the madmen through the door or in your dreams.

"What are you doing here? It's well after midnight." you asked her, gratefully accepting a towel from Nina to wipe the sweat from your face. Alina and Genya lived far from the club, in motels on opposite sides of the city.

"Just in case someone betrays us. At least one of you will save yourself if the Darkling comes to these parts."

Brekker's brilliant and preventive mind had already terrified you before you stepped off the boat onto the familiar land of Ketterdam. The fact that he thought through and arranged your accommodation before anyone could ask him was either another display of his otherworldly mind or a blatant act of arrogance and overconfidence in his strength against the Darkling. But you knew Kaz too well to assume that he underestimated the power of the Black Heretic even for a moment.

"Nice to see you too. Kaz sent for me."

"Since when does the sun summoner do all the Dreg king's orders?" you asked, making Nina laugh.

"Since the moon summoner is constantly skipping her bedtime. You have to sleep. You can't always be on Jesper's special energetic drinks." she scolded you like a little child, to which you snorted indignantly.

"I will take a gorgeous, lovely, very long nap right after we kill Kirigan. Before then, nobody can make me do that. And tell Kaz I remembered him as braver the last time we saw each other on your way back to the motel."

"We are just worried about you, Y/N. You slept the whole night only once since we left."

"Don't tell me you're surprised. If you were me, you would do the same."

"Maybe. But we both know you're stronger than me. I know you can beat him, and even if you can't do this alone, which I doubt…" she wrapped her hand around yours, making you look into her eyes again. "You must know I will always be by your side, like you by mine. It's you and me against the darkness, Y/N."

"You know, you've spent way too much time on that boat with your toughts. You sound like an old uncle giving good advice or something."

"Speaking of advice, if I were you, I wouldn't insult the only person who can wake you up from… this." Nina waved her hand in a circle, pointing to the miserable state you were in.

"You should see Kirigan. I stabbed him." you replied with a self-satisfied smirk, watching the heartrender gasp in shock and Alina shake her head in disapproval.

"What have I told you about starting unnecessary arguments with him and maiming him?"

"That this is a good way to vent my anger and frustration?" you asked innocently with a huge smile.

Alina drew breath to argue with you, but a knock on the door distracted her. You glanced at Jesper, peering into your room, and wrinkled your nose at the light-burnt sheets you and Alina had left.

"The boss wants you, moon girl."

"Not only him." you murmured, pulling the remnants of the quilt from yourself. You took your clothes out of the closet and turned to the people in the room with your hands on your hips. "Are you leaving or staying for the show?" Alina mumbled a silent apology, blushing in embarrassment as she left, along with a laughing Jesper and an amused Nina.

You sighed as you stood in front of the mirror and brushed away the sweaty hair that was stuck to your face. Thanks to Inej and Kirigan, it looks like you'll have a long conversation with Kaz about your safety again. Your friend was sometimes a bigger pain in the ass than you—an achievement that wasn't granted by you to just anyone.

"I just fucking hope you're writhing in pain right now." you muttered to yourself, not believing for a moment in the sincerity of what you just said.

~•♤♤♤•~

"You wanted me." you entered the Dirtyhands' office without knocking, taking a place of honor on one of the two comfortable armchairs in the room. Kaz didn't look up from his papers, but the slight crease of irritation on his forehead told you he had noticed your presence. You were surprised that, after years of separation, you could still read him easily. "It's rude to ignore your guest."

"It's rude to come in without knocking." he replied to your provocation, tracing something he had just written. You snorted in amusement, seeing that you managed to distract him.

"Well, I didn't come here for no reason. You sent Jes for me."

"Jes?" a diminutive you used for his sharpshooter, has earned the man's attention. He gave you a questioning look, throwing the papers on his desk.

"What? Can't I make a friend other than you?"

"I'm your boss." he hummed, getting his cane up from his desk and walking to his dresser. You rolled your eyes as you watched the man's back. The son of a bitch knew perfectly well that you hated it when he didn't look at you during a conversation.

"Sure, if it helps you sleep, tell yourself what you want, Brekker."

"You live at my club, sleep here, eat with my crows, and waste my time taking some useless gossip from downstairs." he enumerated, turning over his things and searching persistently for something.

"And I'd been doing this for four years before you became Mr. Scary Dirtyhands from the Barrel. You just proved my point, Kazzle. We are friends."

You got up from your chair and stood next to him. You glanced at the contents of his drawer and frowned, noticing something familiar. You reached for a small silver box with his REAL initials on it, but the man slammed the drawer shut before you could get your hands on the find. You snorted indignantly as you noticed the smug smirk on his face as he nearly clipped your fingers for your meddling.

Kaz Brekker was sentimental enough to keep the ashtray you gave him.

You involuntarily remembered what you told him when you handed it to him.

"I know you don't smoke and don't celebrate your birthday, but I think that's a pretty nice metaphor and the closure you need."

"What? An old ashtray from the market? Which you probably swept from under the noses of some heavy smokers."

"No, genius, in case you haven't noticed, it has a special engraving. Read it."

"For K.R., let him rest in peace. What's that supposed to mean?"

"You can consider it what you want. A keepsake of your former self, a lost life you might have had, an urn for the ashes of your former self... we both know you're not the same man you used to be. And you have every right to be, Kaz. It's just... I think you deserve something commemorating your old self. The boy who stole half-rotten apples with me to survive. Now you are someone else—someone stronger, wiser, cunninger... but know that I will never forget Kaz, who was my only light when I was at my worst."

"That's pretty sentimental for you. Also, calling me light is not quite an appropriate metaphor." he replied coolly, returning to his book.

You nodded to him, saying goodbye. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw him stroke a silver object for a moment and put it in his pants pocket. You smiled. Apparently, you weren't the only sentimental fool in Ketterdam.

"Then, as my friend, you won't mind telling me about that strange connection between you and the Darkling that keeps you from sleeping without threatening to set my club on fire with your dazzling moonlight?" he asked, snapping you out of your flashback.

"No, because, as my friend, you won't be nosy, and out of politeness, you won't ask."

"I anticipated this reaction. That's why I got this." a velvet ring box magically appeared in his hands.

"Are you going to propose to me? Oh, Kazzie, you have no idea how long I've been waiting for this! You don't have to kneel, sweetheart. We can call Jes, and he'll do it for you. It's a perfect opportunity for him to practice before asking Wylan."

"Can you be serious for just one moment, please?" he asked, blushing slightly and trying to give you one of his famous menacing looks.

"Sorry, I couldn't resist. Besides, you could have foreseen in that plan of yours that I would never waste such an opportunity."

"Just open it." he sighed, tossing you the box. Too curious to find out what was inside, you decided to leave the poor boy alone and refrained from commenting further. You widened your eyes as you saw the real ring. "What? No enthusiastic and loud: "Yes, Kazzie, I'll marry you!", so my crows can tease me about it too? To be honest, I'm disappointed, Y/N."

"Well, I could have been joking about it when I didn't have a ridiculously beautiful ring in front of me. Sorry that I'm a little confused, Kaz."

"It's good you like it, but I'd rather know if it works as it should. Put it on your finger."

"As romantic as always." you murmured, trying on a silver ring with an opal and small diamonds around the stone. You raised your hand and, by using your power, increased the light reflected by the moon that was still in the sky so it could illuminate your new jewelry. "It's beautiful, but I have absolutely no idea what it is supposed to do."

"Protect you." you glanced back at Kaz, only to discover that he had been staring at you the entire time. The white sparkles in his eyes caused by your light captivated you more than the shining diamonds. You shook your head, remembering what happened the last time you gave in to your stupid crush.

"Protect me?"

"I've been doing some research with Alina and Nina about the bond between you and him, the amplifiers… we believe this will weaken the bond between you enough for you to sleep peacefully. He will not enter your mind uninvited." he said, spitting out the words about the Darkling like he was a plague. But you were more interested in something quite different from his open dislike of the Black Heretic.

"Why? Why are you getting through all of it for me? It's not your war to fight. You have no interest in it."

"I have. Since I got you out of the Little Palace, you've been my investment. And I protect everything I invest in and what's worth my time. No matter what."

"You do realize I won't bring you any profit? Alina would be a better choice than me." you questioned his choice. Kaz turned to the window, as if looking for Inej, whose arrival would interrupt this uncomfortable conversation.

Unfortunately for him, the saints had no watch over him. And one of them was waiting for him to gather his thoughts and answer her question. He had to do this without betraying the emotions that had been bubbling up inside him since he had first seen her at one of the Dreg's raids. He was lost the second he saw her and completely fated to love her after their first conversation.

But she couldn't know it.

She couldn't know that his heart was gone with her and that it took him ages to find himself after she disappeared. He promised himself to keep her away from him. To make sure he wouldn't fall for her beauty, mind, eyes, smile, and laugh like he had done as a child. But the second he saw her again, he knew that his heart was hers. Hers to keep, hold, break, play.

But she couldn't know it.... At least not now. Not when he had just snatched her from the Darkling's grasp.

Not when he wasn't ready to love her the way she should be loved.

"That's for me to evaluate and for you to make sure I won't regret this. Besides, I only invest in one-of-a-kind. I don't need more narcissistic saints to go into my office like it was their own." he said after a long silence, without taking his eyes off the window.

He was afraid that his eyes would betray the truth hidden in his stupid heart. He was grateful to all above that she wasn't a heartrender and couldn't feel his treacherous heart beating madly every time he looked at her. He just had to make sure Nina didn't reveal his little secret. He didn't know that the woman had been blackmailed into a similar case by the moon summoner.

"So I'm pretty lucky. I would die if I had to sleep on those inconvenient motel beds."

"Considering how much sleep you actually get, you're unlikely to notice a difference." you gasped, feigning indignation at the mischievous, amused tone of his voice.

"You're a cruel bastard, Kaz Brekker." he finally turned to you with a small smirk on his face. You giggled, only widening his smile.

"Go and check your ring. I hope you won't be threatened by any ugly faces."

"Yes, boss." you saluted, walking towards the door. You opened it and were about to leave when an idea popped into your head. You leaned against the door frame, looking at the man taking his place at the desk. "Kazzie?" you asked sweetly, biting your lip to keep from laughing too soon. The Bastard of the Barrel gave you a questioning look, fearing the familiar tone of your voice and the question coming. "As your fiancée, am I going to get half of your club?"

"Over my dead, cold body." he replied without a second of hesitation, perfectly prepared for such a provocation from your side.

"You know, you need to work on sharing if you plan to be husband material in the future. I feel sorry for your future spouse, unless it'll be your job."

"Go to sleep before I put you in bed myself."

"You should know better than to scare me with a good time, sweetheart!" you shouted back, leaving and pushing your way through the crowd of a few shocked Dregs who had probably heard the part about the fiancée and whom Kaz called to his office as soon as he saw them.

And as soon as he is done with them, Kaz will rip your legs out of your pretty ass. Even Alina and Nina will not be able to help you.

~•♤♤♤•~

The ring worked great. From that night on, you slept like a baby every day. The Darkling's face appeared only occasionally in your nightmares (both bloody ones and… more pleasant ones). But it wasn't REALLY him. Just a messed-up version of your sick imagination.

In the meantime, you trained with Alina and Nina (the woman needed the presence of other Grishas in Brekker's gang; besides, she was an amazing friend, and she also made wonderful waffles); you developed your powers; and you two gossiped with Genya, as she changed your looks every week so that no one would accidentally recognize you (by the way, you learned that David was heading this way to reunite with the love of his life).

You became close to Jes (you had the honor of being trained with HIS PISTOLS) and Inej, whose comforting company was invaluable (as well as the rooftop stealth lessons. Kaz cursed her after the first time you scared him by climbing through his office window and giving you a barrier. Of course you had your mind, and you didn't listen to him. Your unexpected visits to his office only became more frequent.)

So you could say that everything was on its way back to normality.

But it wasn't. Because one fine day, when the crows, Kaz, you, Alina, and Genya were eating breakfast at his club, someone showed up at your door.

Someone you didn't want to see more than the Darkling himself.

"What the fuck is she doing here, if I may culturally ask?" Alina gave you an apologetic look as Baghra walked casually into the crows' kitchen like she belonged here. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Kaz taking any sharp metal objects from the table that you might have used to attack the woman.

You and Baghra had a rough relationship. Due to the fact that you and Aleksander were something, the woman did not look at you very favorably. You had no intention of fawning over a woman who wanted to kill her own son, either. Maybe your feelings for the Darkling were... unclear, but you wouldn't wish anyone, not even your worst enemy, a mother who was willing to stand against her own child, to spurn him instead of doing... anything to help him out of his darkness. It was not in line with your moral views. But no one here seemed to care since they invited the mother of Satan to your table.

"It's nice to see you too, Y/N."

"I don't even have enough respect for you to lie to you and admit that seeing you didn't ruin my day. I will ask one last time..." you got up from the table, shielding Kaz and the crows as you summoned your power. "What are you doing here?"

"My son is looking for you all over the world, do you think I won't try to get to you first before he does?"

"Oh, you've already shown how much you care about outdoing Kirigan in reaching us. I'm asking you, what do you want from us?"

"I came here for you. Because of you, child." you stiffened slightly, wondering what else the old woman had to say. But you would die before admitting that Baghra's help would be invaluable to your little band of rebels. Your pride was both your greatest strength and weakness.

"Well, excuse me, but I have more important things to do than listen to some old lady's ravings. I haven't finished my breakfast yet, and I'm far too sober for another conversation about how everyone wants to use me as a weapon."

"Every day I'm less surprised by how you ended up with my son. You two are a perfect match for each other." she snapped, annoyed at your indifferent attitude.

"I'd suggest you get to the point. You were the one who wanted to meet with us. As our moon summoner mentioned, we don't have to listen to you. And trust me, I have absolutely no intention of stopping her when she wants to kick you out of my club." Kaz stood next to you, measuring the woman with a watchful gaze.

You were proud that he believed in your and Alina's powers and wasn't afraid to provoke the shadow summoner in your presence. You cast a fleeting glance at him, watching as Baghra gave him an appraising look.

"Mr. Breaker. It would be better for you and your club if work with the summoners of the sun and moon ended in Ravka. You have no idea what you're getting yourself into."

"I never make ill-considered decisions, and certainly not out of fear." he replied with his poker, business face.

"This is only a trait of the greatest winners or greatest losers."

"You don't have to worry about him. Mr. Brekker is always on the winning team." you answered for him, having had enough of this woman. Unfortunately, it looked like she wouldn't be leaving you so soon.

"Turn that light out, girl, before the Grishas swarm here. I won't hurt your boyfriend and his friends." you frowned as you heard Jes coughing in the background, trying not to laugh. With a wave of your hand, the white light around you vanished. You watched in displeasure as a smirk began to form on Baghra's lips.

"He is/I am not my/her boyfriend." together with Kaz, you both uttered these words as Baghra pushed past you. This caused you to turn to one another and exchange equally awkward, perplexed looks.

"Whatever, just get your lovebird butts over here." she murmured as she unfolded the map on the table and took a few items out of her bag. You snorted at seeing a small wooden statue of Aleksander.

It was going to be a long and tiring morning.

~•♤♤♤•~

"We have to hurry before your boy gets here. Good thing he is walking with the cane, at least it keeps him from sneaking up on us." Baghra growled at you. She'd only been here a week, and she'd already ruled everyone. You were no longer surprised at where Aleksander inherited his incredible self-confidence and arrogance.

"For the love of God, I'm telling you for the last time, KAZ IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND. Besides, if I were you, I wouldn't underestimate him. You could actually learn from him. You'll need a cane soon, too."

"Can you two just stop arguing for once and focus on the task at hand?" the sun summoner lingered, following you to the basement of the Crow Club.

"I'm sorry, Alina, that I'd rather banter with that witch than figure out how to seduce her son, lull his guard down, pluck the antlers of a wonderful steg out of his hand, and break the link between us once and for all."

"Start by undoing a few buttons on your blouse and letting your hair down; that should be enough for him to lose his mind." she advised you, making you and Alina shudder, both equally abashed.

"Seriously?" you asked mockingly, giving her a disgusted look. Nevertheless, you followed the woman's suggestion. "What is the next step? Shall I wear some nice underwear?"

"Not necessarily, but it would be nice to take off that ring. I doubt Aleksander would appreciate that someone other than himself gave you such gaudy jewelry." you snorted, taking off the only thing keeping the Darkling from crossing the walls of your mind.

You bypassed Baghra's outstretched hand and handed the ring to Alina. The older woman snorted indignantly at what you stuck your tongue out at. She didn't expect you to trust her with anything, even something as small as Kaz's ring, right?

"Done. What's next?"

"You need to make a connection. Every time he thinks of you or you think of him, you seek each other out and make a link. Imagine his face, voice, and silhouette; recall some memory associated with him; do anything to have him in front of your eyes. It should work and take you to where he is now. Just like when you two were getting into each other's dreams before Mr. Brekker gave you this ring."

"I did not seek him of my own free will. It just happened." you defended yourself, not wanting anyone to think you were looking for the Darkling like a lost puppy.

"You know him. He will continue to invade your thoughts and your life to convince you of the error of your ways and choices. This ring can work now, but what happens when you two get stronger in the future? It will stop working. You will be condemned to endure his pervasive presence. In the morning, afternoon, nights, and midnights. He won't let you go. Never. You cannot extract the stag from your own body. So you must find a way to block him permanently. Not by some magic ring."

You sighed, realizing she was right. You will be free of him only when any bond between you is gone. The only thing you were afraid of was that it existed between you and the Darkling long before you killed the stag...

Darkness and its light. Moon and shadow. Destined to be together. United at the end of the day.

"And what if I fail and he chokes me, stabs me, or just uses the cut on me?"

"We will observe the energy around you. If we see too many shadows or your light, we'll pull you out."

"All right. Let's get this over with." you sat down, leaning against the wall of the Crow Club basement, praying to all of Inej's mighty saints that your plan would work.

You closed your eyes, remembering the moment before your big performance at the winter fete.

You had to pretend that you didn't know Kaz, and then you had no idea what he was doing here wearing one of the soldiers uniforms. He promised to explain everything to you, but then Aleksander came.

"I'll take her from here." he said to Kaz, letting him know that he was no longer needed.

But he has not left you. Aleksander ignored him, examining your kefta carefully. It was beautiful. Genya decorated it with silver threads and embroidered stars and moons in different phases. However, the fact that probably delighted him the most was its black (but actually dark navy blue) color. But he didn't care about the true color of your kefta as long as it looked black to any other observer.

A clear signal that you were his moon.

"I have something for you." he whispered as he leaned closer to you so that your noses were practically touching. He pulled something shiny out of his sleeve. He held the silver chain up to your eye level so you could see the pendant. Moon with a star. You shifted your gaze from the shiny object to those mesmerizing black eyes staring at you in pure adoration. "I know you're practically festooned with these symbols, but I wanted you to know..." he interrupted, brushing your hair over one shoulder so he could place the necklace over your neck. He planted a quick, tender kiss on your nape as he clicked the silver jewelry. "That you're not just a Saint Y/N, summoner of the moon. You're mine moonlight in the worst darkness of mine. My hope and peace. The only light I let through my shadows."

You grabbed the pendant, noticing your initials carved into the back of the moon.

"It's beautiful." you turned in his arms to whisper in his ear, making him shiver as you kissed his earlobe. "Aleksander..."

~•♤♤♤•~

You opened your eyes.

A dim light illuminated Kirigan's war room.

You did it. Now all you had to do was seduce him. Piece of cake.

You let yourself watch him flick through some papers, wrinkling his nose and occasionally running a hand through his hair. The exact same one with the stag antler still stuck in it. You shook your head, remembering your task. You had to outsmart him. And in such a wise way that it didn't cross his mind that you might have bad intentions towards him.

"Aleksander." you whispered as you stepped out of the shadows. The man either really didn't notice you or he was a brilliant actor, judging by the pure shock that painted his face the moment he turned to meet your gaze. "You seem surprised to see me."

"I am." his mask of indifference and self-confidence quickly fell back into place. "But perhaps I shouldn't be. I should have known you'd prove to be an apt pupil. Not many can learn that trick." he placed the papers on the desk and leaned against it. "But after our last meeting, I had the impression that you didn't want to see me again. What changed your mind to seek me out?"

"I hate to say this, but I realized you were right."

"How so?" he began to watch you with interest, too curious to know what you were going to say to repay you for stabbing him last time. The fact that he didn't pounce on you with his shadows the moment he saw you gave you an odd sense of confidence. Maybe you could have made it.

"I was meant for more. And you were the first person to see me as I truly am. First to help me realize what I'm meant for. First to tech me how to use my power and how to see it as something more incredible than terrifying. First to see, I was more than a scared little girl. That I was powerful Grisha and I can do anything I want." with every word you said and every step you took towards him, you could see his mask crack open, revealing his true emotions. However, there was still a shadow of uncertainty and suspicion in his eyes. You had to remove it if you wanted to win this battle.

"Was I? And what about Alina? Or your helpful friends that take you away from Little Palace?" you hoped you didn't show that his words affected you. You were afraid that somehow he might have discovered a little help from Kaz and his crows.

"They… they don't understand the power growing within me. I thought that Alina might share my feelings, but … it seems to me that we understand our possibilities completely differently when it comes to our powers. And my friends… I think they're more afraid of what I can do than admire it as… as you did."

"That's not their fault. I did try to warn you. Tried to explain that with so much power that flows in our veins, usually comes fear from the side of our loved ones."

"I know. I think I'm starting to finally understand that now." you took one slow step towards him, feeling his watchful gaze on you. "There are no others like us, and they never will be. We are connected by our powers. Alina can live without us, but you and me… you and me are destined to work together and to stand by our sides. There is no darkness without light, but it's the moon that brings it into the night and that lives among the shadows, working with them… Like calls to like, right, Aleksander?"

In his eyes, you could see how much he wanted to believe you, how much he wanted the words you said to be true... but you knew that Aleksander lived too long to believe only empty words. He needed conclusive proof that you were on his side and that you were only his moon. And you had to convince him somehow.

"As I delighted as I am that you found your way to me, what do you want?"

"That thing that binds us. I think you fear it more than you actually care to admit."

"I fear everything there is to fear; it makes me strong. I understand things about power that you've had years yet to learn, moonlight."

"Well, as you said, with a good teacher, I'm a very apt pupil. But I think we both know… that it's not all about power, though, is it?" you walked the distance between you two and stood chest-to-chest with him. "What about the other bond we share? That one I was avoiding for too long." you slowly cup his cheek, making him close his eyes at the touch of your soft skin. You tenderly stroked one of his black scars on his cheek, which made the Black Heretic sighe in relief. "I want you, Aleksander." he opened his eyes, looking at you in disbelief when he tried to seek any sight of lies on your face. "And being in your presence terrifies me as much as making me feel… like I finally belonged somewhere. Like I was made by saints to be next to you. It felt... right in some crazy way."

"Love is for madmen, Y/N. And I've already told you…" you shivered as his cold fingertips touched the hot skin of your neck. His fingers went to the silver necklace—your only sin against your friends. He took the pendant in his hands and kissed it, not taking his eyes off yours. "You're my moonlight. Nothing has changed, and I doubt it ever will... for both of us."

You pulled him by the hair to connect your lips in a long-awaited kiss, too annoyed with how long you had to work him out. (Or too scared that his words are true.) You moaned as he bit your lips, and in one sweeping motion, he scooped you up off the floor and sat you on his desk.

He pulled away from you, dropping his kefta on the floor, and went back to kissing you as if you were the only one that mattered in this world. But the next amplifier's whereabouts map you laid on as he kissed your soul out of you was a glaring reminder that you could never have truly had him.

You would never be his first choice.

"Forgive me for stabbing you, then." you whispered into his mouth as you broke apart for a moment to catch your breath. He pressed into you more fervently than before, caressing your waist tenderly.

"I will have kissed these tempting, sweet lips, even if it means I'll get stabbed by you, every time I do it."

That was good to know, you thought, throwing your arms around his shoulders and slowly pulling out the dagger from your sleeve as he continued to kiss you greedily, like he wanted to sate himself with you while he still had you in his arms.

"Your words, not mine." you murmured, catching his mouth with yours while driving the dagger into his hand. He snarled, breaking away from you and trying in vain to yank the metal out of your hand. You tried to pry the last stag's bone out of him.

But suddenly, just as you were about to do it, you find yourself back in the basement of the Crows Club.

You were breathing fast, frantically looking around the room. Kaz was kneeling a step away from you and watching you worriedly as you tried to calm down.

From the cane that was on your leg and his firm grip on your arm, you figured out pretty quickly why you suddenly came back. You yanked your arm from his hand in your anger, forgetting his phobia of touch and how much of an achievement it was for him to hold your arm.

"What the hell, Brekker?! I had him! I could end this right there! UGH! Why did you let him break our connection?!" you screamed in frustration, looking resentfully at Alina and Baghra.

"You nearly blew yourself out with your power, and they couldn't bring you back."

"I had it under control, Kaz!"

"Oh, really?" he asked mockingly, struggling to his feet with the help of his cane and walking over to you with equal anger painted in his eyes. "Because it didn't look good from my point of view. You could have blown up the whole club..."

"Of course you would only care about your stupid, fucking club! Forgive me, Dirtyhands. Next time I'm going to save the damn world from the Darkling, I'll pick up a place other than one of your fucking bases!" you yelled at him, pushing past a shocked Alina and Baghra.

"Y/N, come back here!" he shouted after you. The distinctive sound of his cane told you he was following you.

"I'm not your fucking property, Brekker! I can go anywhere I want!" you screamed, running as fast and far for him as you could, thanking everyone above that Brekker wasn't able to catch up with you. You needed a moment to yourself. And you only knew one place in all of Ketterdam where you could be truly alone.

~•♤♤♤•~

For a long time, you hated harbour. It was a reminder of your weakness—a reminder of a girl who got kidnapped by slave hunters. Then you met Aleksander and became one of the strongest Grisha. From then harbour was for you to remind you of the birth of Saint Y/N. Moon summoner. It was funny for you to see how easy it is to get on the ship and go anywhere you want. Be anyone you want. But you don't have this choice anymore. Not until your past stops chasing you whenever you close your eyes.

"I knew you'd be here." Kaz's voice below you made you shiver, but you didn't grace him with your gaze. "You'd be too merciful to me by choosing an easily accessible spot, wouldn't you?" he grumbled as he clambered next to you on the crates of goods. He sighed as he managed to climb up. He tossed his cane, catching it spectacularly and resting it against the crate beneath you. He leaned forward, staring out at the harbour with you, when the wind blew his hair, messing up his always perfectly styled hairdo.

"Nobody made you follow me around, Kazzle." you murmured, casting a fleeting glance at him, grinning mischievously at how tired he was of climbing crates. Someone here was in bad shape. Brekker must sit with these plans and papers for too long.

"I did." you turned your head to meet his piercing gaze. "I already told you. I take care of my investments."

"Maybe you're making a mistake."

"I'm never mistaken. I know when and how much to invest in something valuable."

"But what if I'm a lost cause? What if you're wrong this time? Why do you think I'm done with the Darkling? Me and him have so much in common... what if I become like him? Are you not afraid? That one day, in my naiveté, I'd decide Kirigan was worth a second chance and betray you? That one day I'll stop controlling my power and that I'll hurt you? How can you sit here so calmly and..."

"Because I know you better than myself. I may not believe in saints, but I believe in you, Y/N. I will always believe in you."

You swallowed, looking down in embarrassment. You didn't deserve this.

"I get caught up in it sometimes. That I return with memories to the Little Palace. I wonder what I could have done differently to prevent all this. How could I reason with him, what could I do to dissuade him from his plans. How to behave, what to say out loud, and what to keep to yourself. And I'm furious with Baghra that, being his mother, she didn't fight for him to the end; she gave up before we could do ANYTHING for him together. And I curse myself every time I feel guilty, knowing that I left him utterly alone. So tell me, Kaz, knowing now all these doubts growing within me, do you still believe in me?"

The killing silence told you everything you wanted to know.

"Come on. Go right ahead, Kazzie. Call me a fool, an idiot who wants to believe that everyone deserves someone close, someone they can trust. Who stupidly believes in giving people a second chance." you said, afraid to look up to see the revulsion in the eyes of the only person you could always count on.

Kaz said your name, but you ignored him completely, feeling tears slowly welling up in your eyes. Suddenly you felt the cold steel crow's head of his cane under your chin. Brekker forced you to look into his eyes. And you thanked all the saints for the tenderness that was still present in them.

"You know, I don't think that about you. You are a Grisha. The moon summoner. The only beacon of hope in the darkness. I think that in your job description lies faith even in the most deprived, lost, and broken souls."

"I didn't know that poetic side of you, Brekker."

"I've changed since the last time you saw me."

"Really?" you asked, nodding at his gloves and cane. He caught your eye, gripping the crow's head tighter. "Hey. You have every right to do that, Kaz, okay? I was kidding, and I didn't know it was still a sensitive subject. I'm sorry. Apart from that, I can name more. For example, you still have a stick in your ass when it comes to pranks. It was too easy to get on your nerves with Jes." you said, trying to make a joke to lighten the atmosphere.

"Looking now at you, it's better for humanity that you haven't become a saint. Saints, protect some wretch who would have asked you for help." you smiled at him, glad he understood your intentions.

"Now, I feel hurt, Kazzie. Wouldn't you pray to me if they hung my holy image up here somewhere?" you asked, offended, putting your hand over your heart.

He knew he would spend hours, days, and weeks praying to her, only to see her face again and hear the voice of the Saint of his heart...

"No. No saint has ever watched over me. It wouldn't make sense to pray to you either. Especially since I knew you personally before you became a mighty Grisha."

"Well, I'm no saint yet, but since I'm your newest investment, I guess that means I'm supposed to serve you in some way. And since I'm not going to be your errand dog or spy crow, I guess a good compromise would be if I became your bodyguard. Then you can't say that there's no saint watching over you."

"I don't need a guardian angel."

"It's good then that I'm far from being an angel." you stared at each other, the wind blowing your hair, as you enjoyed the understanding between you and the unspoken acknowledgment of your closeness.

Kaz Brekker could not have a weakness. This city would use it against him very quickly. But he felt that perhaps his weakness could be powerful enough to be his greatest asset instead of his darkest burden. Maybe he didn't have to worry about her that much.

"Ketterdam was boring without you. It was also harder to work without your… skills." he said uncertainly, averting his gaze from your piercing, mesmerizing eyes.

"Is that your way to tell me you missed me?" you were teasing him and pushing his cane. He almost fell over when you broke his only support. You almost couldn't prevent yourself from laughing.

"We could have gained much more kruge if you had been here."

"I didn't want to leave." you whispered, involuntarily remembering the day they kidnapped you.

"I know." he leaned towards you, forcing you to look into his eyes. "You don't have to worry about them. I made sure they were six feet deep underground before you even set foot in Ketterdam." your heart warmed at the thought that he was chasing them for you.

He made sure you were 100% safe and comfortable before he brought you back home. Home. You didn't think you'd find him among the crows, thieves, and the Dreg Club. You didn't think you'd feel this way about him—one of the men whose lifestyle was far from normal and safe.

"You're getting soft in your old age, Brekker." you replied with a half smile, holding back unwanted tears. You weren't that weak girl anymore. You were Grisha. And thanks to the man sitting next to you, you were (almost) free. You grabbed his cane, right next to the crow's head, where Kaz's hands were. His gaze flicked to where your hands were so close together. He turned his head to meet your watery eyes. "Thank you, Kaz. For everything. It means a lot to me. Even if it was foolish to break into the Darkling's palace and kidnap us like sacks of potatoes."

"It was the perfect plan! Nobody noticed us." he was indignant, immediately defending his action.

"Yeah, but what I and Alina get hit with every time Jesper and you steer that wooden cart over rocks is ours. You could really choose a path that wasn't made of stones."

"Next time, it's up to you to make a plan to escape the 500-year-old shadow summoner. We'll see how you do." he snorted, offended, but didn't move an inch. Contrary. His hand moved closer to yours, wrapping precariously around yours on his cane.

"Less than a week back in Ketterdam, and you're already letting me into your plans? Aww, I love you too, Kazzie."

He would give all the kruge of this world to hear those words from you for the rest of his life... and it surprised him that he wasn't afraid to admit it to himself at all.

"And I almost forgot how annoying you can be."

"Don't worry. I have all the time in the world to shrink your inflated ego and remind you of that, boss." Kaz held his breath. He stared at you searchingly, trying to find in your face the answer to whatever question he was asking in his head. You unknowingly scooted closer to each other so that your shoulders rested against each other.

You were much closer to each other before. Kaz (on his good days) even felt comfortable hugging you for a while. After years apart, you thought it would take ages for him to get used to your presence again and the brief touch without going underwater with Jordi.

But you were here. Holding hands, leaning against each other, and staring into each other's eyes.

You shivered as you felt his breath against your cheek when he leaned a little closer to you, testing his border.

"You're shining." he whispered softly, hypnotized, afraid to break the silence between you.

"What?"

"Your eyes are shining." his trembling hand took your cheek as you were watching him speechless. Even in your wildest dreams, you wouldn't suppose he would hold you like that. He truly changed. He beat Pekka, and now the King of Ketterdam was fighting with his demons. You were so proud of him and also sad that you weren't with him at the beginning of his road to healing. "And the light is coming out of your skin. You're shining like a star for lost souls."

"You're not lost... not anymore." you whispered, your voice trembling, fully understanding what he had left unsaid.

"I was. But now the moonlight is lighting up Ketterdam's darkness again."

"Kaz... I..." you held your breath, staring at him in anticipation. You didn't know what for. All you knew was that taking your eyes off him for even a second was an unforgivable crime.

Your noses were almost touching, your lips were the closest you've known each other. And Kaz was as calm as if he'd never had a haphephobia. As if the situation with Jordi never happened. You were afraid his waters would finally rise, interrupting your moment, but as soon as your foreheads touched, all the logical thoughts in your head went to hell. It was just you and him.

And you would still enjoy that closeness if the sound of breaking glass and Jesper's curses hadn't driven you apart.

"Here you are! How the hell did you get in there?! Get down! We're leaving in half an hour!" Jesper shouted to you from below and disappeared as quickly as he appeared. You cleared your throat, realized what Jes said after a long moment.

"We are leaving?" you asked, surprised. Bastard didn't say a word about going anywhere.

"Yes. I'll explain everything to you on the ship." he gave you a brush-off as he began his downward journey.

"On the ship? Kaz, what have you planned?!" you shouted angry as you followed him.

~•♤♤♤•~

"This is the dumbest plan ever made, and believe me, I've been to more than one of his idiotic ideas." you said, pointing at the offended Kaz.

Your great friends (and Baghra) have decided to sneak into the Darkling's palace, steal his maps and war plans, and set the Little Palace on fire.

You started to doubt their good sanity... or sobriety.

"Sooner or later, we have to sneak in there. Aleksander has stolen from me all the books and records of our ancestors; he is in possession of immense power, and we can not allow him to make use of it." you clenched your fists, almost ready to pounce on the woman for revealing the Darkling's true name.

"Who is Aleksander?" you ignored Kaz's question, nervously twirling the ring he gave you on your finger.

"Was he able to steal something from YOU? And you let him do it? How surprised I am."

"What are you implying?"

"I implying that we are in some huge coach driven by your men, leaving Ketterdam on your initiative and entering the lion's mouth because you said so. In my place, you'd be suspicious too."

"The odds of me betraying you are as high as the odds that you will."

"And why is that?" you hissed, furious at how easily she got on your nerves.

"Aleksander has a knack for manipulating people. A few sweet words, and even your boyfriend won't be able to count on your devotion anymore."

"Watch your mouth. I'm not her boyfriend." Kaz growled, tensing up next to you, thereby stopping your quarrel. Baghra shrugged, continuing her quiet conversation with Alina. In your mind, you were planning the old lady's slow death until someone's hand grabbed yours in a strong grip.

You turned your head towards Kaz. He stared blankly out the window, completely ignoring your gaze. Instead, he started drawing circles on your palm, trying to calm you down somehow. You turned your head in the opposite direction, smiling to yourself at the tender gesture. Unbeknownst to you, Kaz had the same smirk as yours on his face.

The rest of the trip to the city was uneventful. As planned, Alina and you stayed in Baghra's secret stash while the rest went off to play heroes. Your job was to distract the Darkling, and Alina was supposed to watch over you.

You'd agree to their plan if your role wasn't just to stand by while others risked their lives trying to get the information you all needed.

But you decided not to argue with the others about it this time. After all, they couldn't control you once you got into the palace. You might as well have snooped around, looked for what you needed, and done most of the work for them. Closing your eyes and getting ready to connect with the Darkling, you only hoped that your little disobedience would go unnoticed.

~•♤♤♤•~

You just finished searching Kirigan's study, war room, and bedroom. You were on your way to the last room - the library, when you bumped into the one person you wanted to avoid.

You were paralysed as soon as you saw him walking down the hall. You hoped he wouldn't look in your direction, but the general (alert as always) glanced at you briefly before disappearing from your view. You had the faintest hope that he would think you were a vision, but all of it vanished when you felt a hand gently wrap around your neck and pin you against the wall.

"You either have too much free time or you enjoy haunting me at random times, little moon." you didn't answer, too scared that the moment he touched you, all your power took on a life of its own, merging with his shadows, as it usually does when your skins meet for the first time after a long separation. You were defenceless. Kirigan frowned, watching you with growing interest. "Speechless? Not any irritating responses? Do you fear me, Y/N?" his taunts brought you to your senses, forcing you to calm down immediately. You couldn't wait for Alina to be rescued. You had to fight him yourself.

"That's what you want, isn't it? To have everyone and everything under control, too scared to say or do anything against you."

"Fear is a powerful ally and also loyal."

"Not as loyal and lasting as love, trust, respect." you tried to break free from his grip, but all attempts to remove his hand from your neck proved futile. You were lucky that instead of tightening the grip and cutting off your air, he just wrapped his other arm around your waist, pulling you closer so that your faces were mere millimetres apart. "We could have had it, Aleksander. All of it. All you had to do was set me free and make me your equal."

"You'll come to feel it towards me someday. For now… even though I truly want to, I have no time for you, moonlight. Your friends are waiting for me. But don't get the wrong impression…" he leaned towards you, stroking your cheek tenderly as he whispered in your ear. "I will be back for you, my Y/N. Wherever you are hiding from me."

You shivered as he kissed your temple, making this terrifying promise to you. At some point, his shadows enveloped you completely and sent you back to the room where you and Alina were hiding.

And after one look at the sun summoner, you both knew what you had to do.

~•♤♤♤•~

You couldn't remember the last time you ran so fast in your entire life. It must have been back in your Ketterdam days, doing some little errands for the Dregs.

But this time, you weren't running to save your life. You ran to save Kaz Brekker's ass, who was the only one (not counting Inej, who was already hidden somewhere with Alina, waiting for you in harbour) who didn't return from his mission. As you expected, everything went to hell without you, and if you and Alina hadn't arrived, half of the crows (including Baghra) would have been captured by Aleksander's grishas. You wouldn't feel sorry for the old woman, but Alina insisted on saving her.

Jes, Wylan, Nina and Baghra searched other parts of the Little Palace, trying to burn everything in their path. You could still make it. If only Brekker hadn't gotten lost in the meantime. You knew you should go with him. You've always been a team player, and pairing you with Alina for this mission and leaving you behind was their worst idea.

You promised yourself that the next time you'd strap that risky idiot to your hip.

That's why you breathed a sigh of relief when you saw him at the end of the corridor. But instead of running up to him and yelling at him for his thoughtlessness, you hid in the shadows as he backed away slowly. Someone had to catch him. You caught his eye for a moment, glad he noticed you and started to head your way. Thanks to this, you could assassinate his attacker and try to escape from the palace.

Piece of cake. If he wasn't talking to a fucking Darkling.

"I know you kidnapped my moon summoner. Now you're going to tell me where you stashed her." you cursed internally, feeling yourself start to panic. You guys were officially screwed.

"We didn't take her. She fled on her own." you marvelled at how Kaz could still keep his composure with an angry Darkling a few feet in front of him. Sometimes you forget how mentally strong he was.

"I don't doubt in it… where is she? I won't ask you again."

"I don't know. I don't own her… but it's pretty clear she wasn't interested in being a captive anymore."

Aleksander got even angrier at the little insinuation that Kaz took better care of you, that he didn't treat you like an asset, unlike the general. You cursed Dirtyhands for wanting to mock and taunt the Darkling, even though you could see that he wasn't so confident around him.

"I heard about you. And your crows. It would be a shame if something happened to such a talented group." the Darkling summoned some of his shadows, causing Kaz to back away and reach for the light grenade that you and Wylan had prepared. "It's good for you that you have the decency to show signs of fear."

"I'm afraid of what I must."

"And yet you are not so defenceless." Kaz raised an inquiring eyebrow. "Don't make a fool of yourself, Mr. Brekker. I can feel my moon's power everywhere. Especially when it's imbedded so much into one small object."

You tensed, remembering that you had given Kaz the necklace before he left for the Little Palace. A necklace whose pendant you poured so much moonlight into that no shadows could surround him while wearing it or only holding it.

Defence against the Darkling. Specially prepared for situations like this. However, handing it to him, you hoped the two would never meet, growling at each other like two rabid dogs.

"Y/N must have strong feelings for you to give you some of her power. And you for her. Putting your people and yourself at risk, your profit, your club. In the name of what, Mr. Brekker?"

"If you did thorough research on me, you'd know that all of Ketterdam knows I don't need a reason to do things."

"You'll never fully appreciate what she really is. But that's alright. Because I do." Aleksander let Dirtyhands' insult pass over his ears, trying to annoy him that much, so he let his guard down. You knew very well that method, just like you knew that Kaz wasn't foolish to fall for it.

"You've right. I'll never use her as a weapon or treat her like a saint. That's not what she wants. You may understand her powers, but you have no idea who she really is. What's in her mind. What are her dreams and desires. All you care about is her power, which I don't give a damn if she has or not. You see her only as a moon summoner. Not Y/N. You don't know the woman she was before Grisha's thing. You will never know how amazing and indescribable she was before Ravka. This is part of her that only I was allowed to see. You can't change the fact that I know her better than you."

"You're forgetting one important fact. You are a child, and she is Grisha. Y/N may take years to forgive me… but I can wait. Take away my shadows, and I still have something you don't. Time. Meanwhile, you will grow old. Your hair will grey, but she will remain ageless. Like me. Not mention your little inconvenience. Do you think you'll be able to touch her for more than a few minutes before your body grows old? That you'll be able to give her the life she deserves? We both know that one day, maybe a year from now, maybe fifty, she will realise that she has only one equal. There are no others like us, and there never will be. Even you can't change that, Mr. Brekker." he gave him a hostile look, laughing mockingly as he noticed that Kaz continued to back up with each step the Darkling took towards him until he did not stand in front of your hiding place. "Don't worry. I'm not going to kill you. Time will do it for me." he summoned more of his shadows, wanting to scare him with his power. You three knew very well that with your necklace around his neck, no cut would kill him."You should have stayed in Ketterdam, Mr. Brekker."

At this point, you both decided to step in. Kaz threw his grenade, and you summoned your power, blinding the two of them. You grabbed Kaz's arm, and you both ran (as fast as his leg would allow). You stopped only a few corridors and stairs further, at the crossroads where you were all supposed to meet. Along the way, you avoided several fires that the tidemakers were busy with.

"What are you doing here?!" he growled furiously at you as you finally stopped, only making you more angry at his recklessness and attitude. He attacked and insulted the most powerful grisha. An 18-year-old with a cane and no powers.

"What am I doing here?! You tell me, what are you doing! You made him mad for no reason! You think now that he knows your identities, he'll let you go so easily? He will hunt you as long as he lives, just like me and Alina! Congratulations, Brekker!"

"I knew the risk." he replied angrily, looking around all four corridors.

"No, you didn't. You'd know a flimsy toy like that one, fucking grenade wouldn't be enough for him with all the amplifiers he's got."

"Well, I guess your little gift was strong enough to protect me. Which brings me to the question… why am I the only one blessed with this power from you?" he asked as he walked over to you, standing a few inches in front of you. You were both panting with quick anger, rage, and adrenaline, which was slowly draining from your systems.

"It's not your business, Brekker." you growled into his face and took a step, trying to avoid him, but his firm grip on your elbow stopped you.

You turned to face him, ready to yank your arm out of his grip and scream at him to fuck off, but all thoughts flew out of your head as soon as you looked into his mesmerising eyes, which were looking at you with concern and… love.

"It is my business." he leaned closer to you, just enough for you to feel his warmth and his scent, and far enough away not to touch you any more than he already did. "You... you're my most important business. And if something happens to you, if he catches you again..." he sighed, shaking his head, trying to find the right words as he licked his annoyed lips, unconsciously drawing your gaze to them and making you hold your breath for a moment, wanting something as forbidden and holy as kissing them. "I don't know how to... express my feelings. I don't know if I even understand them well enough. All I know is that I would rather die than see you enslaved and sorrowful... and it pains me to know that I'm too weak to protect you. That I'll always be too weak FOR YOU."

"You are literally everything but weak. In my eyes, you're the strongest person I know, Kaz. One of the very few to whom I would entrust my life in the blink of an eye."

"And yet I'm not enough for Grisha's love."

"How could you not be enough for something you already have?" Kaz's head snapped up as he watched you, befuddled in complete silence. You hesitantly reached for his hand, giving him enough time to pull away. He did not do. "And because I love you, I cannot be selfish with you. I cannot risk your life just because I have loved you since we were stupid teenagers." he squeezed your hand, too overwhelmed by his emotions to say anything. Fortunately, you understood him without any words.

Slowly, as if time had slowed down just for you two, he leaned towards you, resting his forehead against yours. You stood like that for a moment, enjoying the other's presence, forgetting that the palace was burning around you and probably 100 Grishas were chasing you.

"I will have you, Kaz Brekker. But only when it's safe for both of us." you promised him, whispering with your eyes still closed. "And for that to happen, I have to stay here. I have to make sure he doesn't go after you, that he will be distracted by me instead of planning your death.." you were about to extricate yourself from his grip, but the man only pulled you closer to him, not wanting to let you go.

"Please, don't. Stay with me. You're not a saint or a hero. You said it yourself. More than I could count."

"Kaz…" you took the ring off and put it on his little finger. "Keep it for me until I'm back. As a promise that whatever is going to happen next… I will be back for you." testing your luck, you placed a quick, tender kiss on his finger, feeling him tremble under your lips.

Before you got a chance to change your mind, you ran in the opposite direction, following the voice of the fighting Grishas.

You didn't turn around. You didn't steal a second glance at him, even though you knew he was watching you until you were out of sight. You knew the moment you looked into his eyes again, you'd change your mind.

You had to be strong.

For both of you. For your common future.

~•♤♤♤•~

When you regained consciousness, you weren't surprised that your hands had been handcuffed, so you couldn't use your powers. You were surprised to be greeted by the familiar sheets of Aleksander's comfortable bed.

And the Darkling himself was lying right next to you with his face towards you.

His eyes were closed, giving you a good look at the darker shadows under his eyes than before. Without knowing why, they disturbed you more than those lazily hovering around the bed. For a moment, you listened to his measured, calm breathing, which would probably confuse anyone else and give the illusory belief that the man next to you is sleeping. But you knew him much better than to fall for such a simple trick.

"I know how you breathe when you're sleeping, Aleksander."

"Maybe I was trying to fall asleep."

"Wearing a kefta? Doubtful." he opened one eye, staring at you silently. You felt your heart start beating faster from the nerves. You had no idea why you were here. Or at least you didn't want to admit it to yourself, so you decided to play the fool. "Are the dungeons undergoing some kind of refurbishment, or are they so full that you haven't found another place for me?"

He stared at you silently, deep in thought. He took his time to answer, playing with the strands of your hair that had escaped your bun from an earlier fight.

"It didn't seem like the right place for you" he finally whispered, making you even more suspicious.

"And where is my right place? After I stabbed you in the back so many times? In your bed? In your arms? As a weapon for your use? Where do you see me, Aleksander?"

"By my side. I've always seen you by my side." he answered at once, without a trace of hesitation in his voice. His shadow circled the room, caressing you from time to time. You didn't know if he was planning to let your guard down or if he had completely lost his mind.

"I don't understand. You should be mad at me. Why don't you hate me? Why are you still looking at me like... like you really have feelings for me? This is another one of your games, right? You want me to go completely crazy this time, don't you?"

"No, my little saint moon." he whispered, undaunted by your anger, gently cupping your chin so you had to look him in the eye. "All I ever wanted was someone equal to me. Why should I get mad at you when all you're doing is trying to find your way to me?"

"I don't…"

"Then why did you let them catch you? Don't try to lie to me, Y/N. I was there. I saw with my own eyes how you backed away from running away at the last moment. Why?"

"You know why." you whispered in a shaky voice. You closed your eyes, trying to protect yourself from the Black Heretic's penetrating gaze and show him the tears beginning to form in your eyes. "I have a million reasons why I should give you up, why I should hate you more than anyone else, but the truth is… my heart wants what it wants. And I don't think I can resist this anymore." you couldn't control your tears, but from the tender touch of his hand as he wiped them from your cheek and the clank of the handcuffs opening, you figured they were necessary for him to believe you.

"You have no idea how long…"

"No." you cut him off before he could say anything more." I have one question for you. Answer it right, and I'll forget about the last few months. Answer it right, and I promise you that you will never have to be alone again, that I'll always be by your side, along with your shadows and everything else that you truly are. That I will accept my destiny as being your moon. I won't let anyone scare me away from you ever again. I just… I need you to be completely honest with me. This one time." you cursed yourself at how weak your voice sounded when he grabbed your hand, kissing tenderly the places where the handcuffs were marked. "You don't have to tell me your whole plan; I just want to know… are all of these lies, battles, wars, deaths… just to keep the Grishas safe? You have no other intention behind this than to give our people home, where they don't have to be afraid of people who hate us and our powers?"

"I swear to you, my little moonstone, there is no other reason. I'm not a maniac drunk on power, as everybody tells you. I just want our people to be safe; I want to give them a world where we can explore the abilities of our power without fear of getting killed for being extraordinary. I can only do this with you by my side. As my equal. As a person who thinks like me and can keep up with my plans. As my partner. As the only one I can trust."

"Good." you nodded, cupping his cheek as you pulled him closer to you, so your lips caught each other again.

And maybe it was naive to think he bought your story about being completely devoted to him; maybe it was just another one of his games; maybe this time he really believed your words. Or maybe he was tired of pretending you didn't feel that strange attraction every time you were together.

You did not know. And you didn't want to know.

You gave into that burning desire every time you were near him, explaining to yourself that you had to earn his trust.

But there was much more to this one kiss than just lust.

It was a promise to you.

You will break his heart and make him hate you. You will drive him mad, drive him away, and then he will cast you out. Aleksander will come to think of you not as his lover but as his greatest enemy. Alina, Baghra and you gonna end the circle of unnecessary deaths.

And then you will finally be free...

Or at least... you will kill you both while trying to hate him as you should from the beginning.

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shawty-writes-a-little · 1 year

Text

Amongst the two of us

General Kirigan x princess!reader (one shot)

Word count: 3.4k

Warnings: Period drama misogyny, arranged marriages, arguments, angst, I’ll proofread in the morning pls sorry

Summary: The general and his wife of differentiating moral grounds make their marriage work somehow

An: This one was sitting in my drafts unfinished for so long and it was an alternate ending for another Aleksander fic which I never ended up posting but I worked on this one bc s2 darkling arose a LOT in me so oh well

This one is spoiler free for S2 :)

—

There were two sets of council meetings ever since the General had married the lady y/l/n. For one her name weighed a lot of political power, being the noble lord’s daughter, the princess it was a prestige to have that power at little palace, someone of that huge a name by the general’s side. Well the General himself never cared for the affection of it all, he was too smart the man to see past any political benefit. Y/n, in the peak of her youth had dreams and hopes for her marriage which her soon crushed one after another with every bit of unfolding of her relationship with Aleksander, coming to realise she hadn’t married an affectionate man, not even caring but someone just so powerhungry and cold he doesn’t think twice to bend his morals. Is what y/n thought of him coming to know so more and more of him but remained not so phased after a while, a year into the marriage she would just look back thinking how foolish she it was to expect anything of the man she married.

Yet she thought it worked just fine, if she truly meant to marry for love she might’ve had a summer fling, elope with some stable boy and call it love to be living in some cottage far away…but no, she was destined for duties more than that. She had her own first army council at the little palace, the king’s army. But the king never bothered attend. The Lady Kirigan, the princess, was considered capable with the set of officers she had for most decisions.

Your husband doesn’t share a bed with you but at least you’re the head of first army council meetings. Your husband rarely shares any intimate moments with you but at least you get to see him from camp base to camp base. And of course the most infamous facade of being the pair that does share affection for each other in the glamour dinner parties amongst drunk lords and ladies who believe it just fine.

Honestly on the political front the first army felt more liberated and open with less of the general’s inputs given he wouldn’t join their meetings anymore ever since Lady y/n was placed there neither were the first army officials…mortals rather, allowed in any second army business. “Leave, the room.” Too much for uninterrupted business, the general barged into the meeting room where Lady y/n’s first army officials were having an ongoing discussion given the maps and the reports laid out on the table. “I have some important matters I need to discuss with my lady wife.” He announced as the matters seemed to be quite the work regarding, given he had a letter or document scroll in his hands and it was the general himself who visited.

With a short nod from y/n the officers left the room leaving the two alone, y/n did feel a tad affront on him just barging in through her ongoing meeting well aware he wouldn’t have entertained it if it was the other way around but she wished for whatever matter it was to get done with sooner so she chose not to speak on it “What is it?”

Aleksander placed the letter in his hand on the table for her to read, as she picked it up he spoke “Its a letter to Lord Eldon, a dear friend of your father’s who’s not so particularly fond of me, we need his aid for more men by the Ravaka front since the second army is occupied by the fold but he wouldn’t comply if the letter went from me” Aleksander let out a short scoff on the fact that some lord of a land that covers barely about 5 villages would be distasteful to him, the general, the shadow summoner. But in his opinion these noble lords were so petty about their allies and Aleksander knew he wasn’t that friendly “I need you to sign that letter.”

Y/n had her eyes fixated on the letter reading through till the end, the letter written in a first person way with wordings seeming as if she did write it herself “Did you write this?” She asked looking up from the letter.

“No.” Aleksander replied flatly, surely the general wouldn’t be as free as to go about writing framed letters himself.

“Well next time you feel like writing a letter on by behalf know that I wouldn’t be this straight forward to a dear friend of my father’s who has know me my entire life…” her voice trailed off with a suppressed chuckle that Aleksander didn’t even seem to check the phrasings of the letter once.

“Alright then you write it yourself” He spoke sliding a blank paper across the table to her “Make it as authentic as you’d like.”

“I could write it but I am not going to sign it.” Y/n spoke with sincerity but she was calm to lay it out. “I don’t condone it.”

“I beg your pardon?” Aleksander said raising a brow quite phased that she would choose a decision revolting his.

“If I sign the letter Lord Eldon will surely send his soldiers given he is to watch over a larger estate with his handful of army it would be unwise so no…”

“That is exactly why I want you to sign it. If the letter is from you he will send his men-did-did you not hear me correctly the first time?” He asked budding quite misinterpreting what she meant to say as whole.

“I heard you just right and I am saying no.” Y/n still had a calm yet firm tone of her voice despite his obvious annoyance “Lord Eldon isn’t a sovereign lord his army is the third half of the Royal army…for him to send his soldiers, the domesticity of the people of his land would be compromised. I am not going to sign the letter and bind him with a moral obligation.”

“The domesticity of the people?” He repeated her words with a taunting amusement “You are crossing unnecessary lengths to spite me…just sign it.” Aleksander sighed not considering her genuine people caring intentions behind it.

“Oh I surely do have other things than to be free enough to spite you, General.” Y/n said crossing her arms to a firm stance “Should Lord Eldon send his men for you the crime, the looting, the disruption will increase in his lands with less men on patrol, when he doesn’t even have enough as it is. I am sorry but I cannot sign it.”

“Don’t you understand? This is important. We need those men and it requires just a mere signature of yours!” He exclaimed, very agitated as he let out an exaggerated sigh rubbing his eyes to get over the unwanted annoyance.

“It’s as if I am talking to a wall…you aren’t even trying to understand.” Y/n spoke shaking her head, Aleksander truly believed that y/n’s barrier for the sign was not the honour and morals she abided by but…pettiness. “If you need the soldiers so bad then write the letter yourself. Sign it and send it as yourself the general because frankly ‘we’ don’t need his men…the second army does, you do.”

“Y/n you don’t get to—“

“Lady y/l/n.” She corrected him mid sentence shrugging her shoulders, he wasn’t on first name terms with his own wife even the marriage was quite formal and political, should he believe that he had the authority over her to by using her first name in disdain she’d rather prove him wrong.

“Y/l/n.” He corrected his words with gritted teeth “Sign it. Be done with it.” Aleksander was running out of patience to convince or put forward any debate whilst she remained calm as ever as if he stance his words had no effect on her.

Y/n exhaled and she took the paper in her hands walking across the table to him, she looked at the letter one time as though she were considering signing it right before she tore it apart in his face and let the pieces of paper fall to the floor “I won’t.”

Aleksander huffed, he stood as if that action did not phase him, something he expected at the start of their conversation “It is almost humorous and immature to see how low you are willing to steep just to get a rise out of me.”

All of this over a sign…y/n said in her head yet she knew this conversation would only go further and further to no end. Aleksander was so head strong out of all she tried to explain it why she wouldn’t sign the letter he stood the same ground, “Ah yes of course my favourite hobby!” She said sarcastically rolling her eyes as she attempted to walk past him.

Aleksander stopped y/n in her tracks holding her by her upper arm, taken aback by this sudden action she tried to maintain her distance yet he gave her a firm tug towards him to sound more sincere “You might think you are so much above me with your moral grounds and your honour, silver spoon fed princess y/n, but you stand here, at the little palace, taking your council meetings as the general’s wife…and that’s what bothers you so much doesn’t it?” He sneered “It hurts your petty conscience…however you put it y/n you are not much different than me—you married me.”

“You know Aleksander, I did not have a say in this. It was announced I was to be married to the general…you. Before our wedding I didn’t even know what you looked like, my beliefs had nothing to do with our marriage my father simply married me off to a stranger on the king’s orders. You are just too arrogant to be around.” so much for the spoiled princess. Y/n replied bluntly as she looked at him and he seemed lost at words letting go of his grip on her arm. He instantly regretted his phrasing aware that must’ve stung her, he was not one to apologise but before he could even show his slight remorse for the words he chose she was already walking out her office, leaving him alone…a frequent sight for him. Sight he didn’t want to admit to but hated being used to, her walking away.

—

A distasteful marriage had both Aleksander and Y/n bound to societal presence of being a rather joyous couple, hand in hand and smiling at the guests of the gala. One of the king’s many monthly amusements. Gather Royal gossiping and as Aleksander put it, arse kissing guests time to time for fine dining despite of what goes on within the country. Y/n was raised amongst these dinner parties of fake smiles and niceties, just assuming her smiles wouldn’t be as fake around her own husband was something she hadn’t planned. But there they were, the general and his wife, y/n graciously laughing at his comments as they talked to the Royal guests, arm in arm as if it wasn’t mere hours ago that two of them had an argument over council matters. “Ah Y/n!” One of the ladies from the Royal guests called her as she approached her and Aleksander. “General” the lady nodded respectfully. “You look lovely tonight princess-or should I say lady general now?” The lady commented as she let out a cheerful laugh.

“You wound me by addressing me with titles when you’re quite literally my favourite!” Y/n exclaimed with a courteous smile, “You are on first name basis hmm? Don’t insult our bond with titles!” Truthfully y/n didn’t even remember the name of the Lady who so cheerfully greeted her and Aleksander, she remembered her face from a few of royal dinners and galas from earlier and that was about enough for a small talk. However the ‘first name basis’ was a taunt to Aleksander which he must’ve registered the way his lips fell into a thin smile to seem as if he wasn’t phased.

“They say marriage changes people quite a lot but you two just as gallant as your wedding day!” The lady exclaimed.

“Why thank you that is very polite.” Aleksander spoke with a short nod, he was never the one to get so much involved in any of the small talks it seemed his wife was quite the master with remembering a lot of details about almost every royal guest she did most the talking for him while he’d stand there with small courtesies.

“Surely! And for a marriage to change you it requires quite a lot of the couple to be so present don’t you agree?” Y/n said to the lady in such a subtle manner though her words weighed heavy sly comments directed to Aleksander.

“Oh you are so right! As workaholic as the general is I imagine it is difficult to get his time.” The lady joked unaware of the original scenario of their marriage being worse than that. Y/n didn’t get his time, his thoughts or attention outside of these dinner parties anyways. She never took it up with Aleksander of course, it was bound to be met with disdain. Yet it didn’t stomach her well how getting Aleksander’s time out of his ‘workaholic’ schedule seemed something difficult to the lady and not y/n’s time. She was on the first army council herself and worked just as much…nothing new.

“Happens so often…” y/n’s voice trailed off as she chuckled at what seemed to be a light hearted mention of her husband’s businesses to the lady, “you’d be surprised” y/n added softly for Aleksander to hear. And he did, he’d been hearing these comments and taunts quite a few times in the course of that entire evening.

He thought maybe it had something to do with the correlation of their argument earlier, wether it was or wasn’t his patience wore so thin. After the dinner of snide remarks it almost seemed endless to Aleksander. Once it was over he walked back to y/n’s chambers with her, they left these events together so it would seem that they had the same bedchamber. However when y/n got inside hers thinking Aleksander would walk further down the hall to his, he walked inside the room with her. Y/n simply turned around when he entered alongside her before she could begin to ask the reason for it he shut the door behind him and stood afar exhaling “What was all that about?” He spoke and it seemed so demanding.

“What?” She asked truly clueless, she didn’t think those comments would actually get to him, most of those she most probably forgot even making.

“You kept on taunting me the entire evening!” He said crossing his arms trying his best to maintain his composure yet his body language was so angry and frustrated.

“Oh did I now?” Y/n asked tilting her head trying to go though some of the conversations in her head where he must’ve felt that she had done that, maybe.

“Y/n it-“

“Uh?” Y/n interrupted him mid sentence as he used her first name.

Aleksander spoke further regardless “It was disrespectful to me.”

“Are you going to have another one of your tantrums again? I did not have enough wine for this…” y/n sighed with her subtle composure and if only irritated Aleksander more and more. However much he tried to result her misconduct to her she seemed to be treating it so trivially.

“I am serious.” He said flatly and brisk of frustration lingered his tone.

“So am I. I truly did not drink enough to go through this again” Y/n said raising her brows at him, she gathered that if she reacted and engaged with him seriously, it wasn’t as if he was going to listen secondly he was awaiting for her to react the way he wanted her to so he could tell her how much of an inconvenience to she was to him. To his plans.

“You can’t just ignore me with sarcasm!” Aleksander exclaimed and he felt as though he would loose his temper so he exhaled taking in a breath for that situation to not arise, he wanted to prove his point across and it wouldn’t happen if he acted rather harshly or she wouldn’t be open to listen to him “I am your husband-why don’t I get to call you by your name?”

“Why? Lady y/l/n, lady general, lady wife doesn’t suffice?” She replied leaning on the table in the large bed chambers where he still stood by the doors.

“I address you with titles when you are surrounded and in meetings out of respect but amongst the two of us—“

“There is no amongst the two of us!” Y/n said this time as the subtlety of her tone leaving her. It was beyond her understanding how he his thought process counted her the harbinger of their unpleasant marriage. She threw her hands in the air pointing this to him “This might just be one of the few times where we’re ‘amongst the two of us’ behind closed doors and we are arguing! That’s the most you see for us.”

“Why are you so strongly opinionated towards me? I have never wronged you in any way!” He said exclaiming as he walked a few steps towards her both of their tones so above decency as their conversation got heated.

“Me? I am strongly opinionated? My husband doesn’t even share the same bed as me and you are saying that? Under different circumstances you wouldn’t have married me I’m not your like am I? I am not grisha—had it not been for your political status you wouldn’t even have this conversation. Me! It’s me-I am the one who has never wronged you yet I despise you that much.” Y/n spoke as her voice cracked by the end of it, she had went through this in her head a lot. Everything she could be doing right for him to stop being as cold to her until he drove her to stop believing in them.

Aleksander took a long pause before he spoke, he had never realised that this is what she’d been feeling due to him but it wasn’t is intention. “You…you don’t despise me.” He spoke looking away from him almost as if he couldn’t meet her gaze.

“Alright…sure! You can say anything you want to have the last word of this argument but it does not change the truth!” She spoke frustrated just then Aleksander leaped towards her grabbing the sides of her arms and pinned her to the wall, y/n just started at him blankly just registering how fast that had happened.

“You want to know the truth y/n? The truth is I am exhausted to see you disregard my love for you over and over because you do not fathom it. I have always hated those galas and dinner parties yet you make me await them so I could get to be close to you, if only for the mask of being a happy couple but I so miserably await being close to you. It is difficult to even work around you knowing out of everything I could want of the whole world I want you, your love and it is the one thing I can’t have—you don’t deserve my infuriating love, the darkness of it and had I not pushed you away you would’ve loved me like someone entitled to. I don’t want that entitled, dutiful love…I want it yours. Wholly yours. But it is getting difficult to push you away..” he finished as the two of them gazed into each other’s eyes for quite the long moment. This was the most close they had been and neither seemed to move.

“Aleksander…” finally y/n said softly as her gaze softened towards him. Comprehending everything he just said. His expressions were truly taken aback when she said his name, for someone wanting to be that long buried part of himself, “Kiss me.” She looked at him unfaltering, as he pulled her into him from the waist letting go of her arms and crashed his lips onto hers. Such strong desire of a pushed away love, heavy, unfathomable, messy love. Y/n wrapped her arms around him as the two of them kissed their wearies away.

—

I’m going to write more w s2 plots so let me know if you want to be tagged or request something <333

Hi pls if you’re supposed to be studying or doing anything future you would hate you for being here instead of finishing that please go do it I am in fail girl summer rn and I regret it I love u

#general kirigan x reader #darkling x reader #darkling x reader angst #darkling shadow and bone #the darkling x reader #aleksander morozova x reader #aleksander morovoza #general kirigan x you #general kirigan x reader angst #general kirigan x reader smut #general kirigan #the darkling x you #darkling x fem!reader #darkling smut #shadow and bone fanfiction

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thebadgerclan · 1 year

Text

Unaware

Pairing: Aleksander Morozova x reader

Summary: Some at the Sanctuary are unaware of who you are...

A/N: This is the “protective husband fluff” that I mentioned earlier, but I don’t have an exam next week, so I’m gonna write the other one to lol

I was thinking about how much I think Aleksander would hate people saying that his wife “belongs to him” and crap, so voila

Y/G/T is your Grisha type (Heartrender, Inferni, etc.) and Y/G/C is your Grisha color (red, blue, purple)

Life at the Sanctuary was…different than you were used to. At the Little Palace, there was order; the Grisha had their duties and were kept busy by them, they had their ranks and they stuck to them. But here, in this abandoned noble’s country estate, with no formal training, no Second Army duties to attend to, no children to teach, the Grisha were restless. Restless, and some angry about what had happened to your people, angry that General Kirigan had taken so long to rescue some of them.

And there were Grisha being brought in every day, some that had never resided at the Little Palace, and therefore, had no idea who you were. It didn’t help that when you’d fled the Little Palace, you’d been in your Y/G/C kefta rather than your black, making you appear as just another Y/G/T rather than the wife of the General. There was one such Grisha, Androv, who hadn’t lived at the Palace, and had no idea who you were, that you tried impossibly hard to avoid, but to no avail.

You were in what had become the mess hall of the Sanctuary, several sheets of parchment spread before you. Aleksander had asked you to compile a list of the Grisha who had been known residents of the Little Palace that had yet to arrive at the Sanctuary, in the hopes that a search party could be assembled. But you’d barely scratched the surface when the roster you were referencing was swept from the table on a gust of wind.

“Hello beautiful,” Androv greeted, and you suppressed the urge to roll your eyes. “Androv,” you replied curtly, rising from your seat to retrieve your paper. “Is there something I can do for you?” The Squaller smirked, flicking his wrist and blowing the paper further away from you. “You’ve been playing hard to get, haven’t you? Pretending you don’t see me, acting like you don’t know what I want.”

Everyone in the mess hall had turned to watch; those who knew who you were with fear in their eyes, those who didn’t with concern and interest. “I don’t know what you mean,” you said, stooping to reach for the roster. Androv stepped closer to you, his body pressed to yours. You shot upright, body going stiff, blood running cold. “Get away from me,” you whispered, panic seeping in.

You knew you should shove him away, use your power to get him away from you, but fear had frozen you, stealing your ability to call your power. Unseen, the nichevo’ya that followed you always slithered from the room, intent to alert its master to your distress. Aleksander, who was in the room he’d claimed as his study, felt a knot form in his chest and abandoned his work, rushing through the corridors towards the pull he felt to you.

“And where would be the fun in that, darling?” Androv cooed, wrapping his arms around your middle. You wanted to fight, to scream, to do anything, but you were petrified. Tears streaked down your cheeks, and the Squaller laughed. “So pretty when you cry,” he sneered. A dreadful, cold, sickening feeling had filled Aleksander’s chest, and he broke into a run, needing to find you, to protect you from whatever was causing you such feelings.

“What are you doing?” Fruzsi, your husband’s new second, asked as she entered. Androv turned to face her, but did not let you go. “Oh relax,” he said, rolling his eyes. “It’s just a bit of fun.” The Tidemaker stepped closer, and while you didn’t quite like the woman, at least she was coming to your defense. “She belongs to Kirigan!” It was at that moment that Aleksander entered, and at the sight before him and Fruzsi’s words, his nichevo’ya writhed angrily.

“I will give you exactly ten seconds to unhand my wife and explain what gives you the right to attempt to force yourself on any woman,” your husband said, voice dangerous. Androv shoved you to the ground, as if that would be any redemption, and you cried out. Aleksander came to your side, offering you his hands and gently helping you to your feet. “Aleksander, I… he…”

“Shhh, it’s alright, my love,” you husband soothed, wrapping you in his arms. His voice was calm and gentle, but his gaze was murderous. The nichevo’ya skittered around you, but you knew that they were protecting you, that they could never hurt you. “Do you care to explain yourself?” your husband asked. “I didn’t know,” Androv stuttered. “I didn’t know she belonged to you.”

You felt Aleksanders anger spike, as well as saw it; his shadow monsters shrieked. “Allow me to make one thing perfectly clear,” he said. “To all of you. Y/N does not belong to anyone. She belongs to herself. Yes, she is my wife, but she does not belong to me.” Aleksander flicked his wrist, and an inky gash opened on Fruzsi’s cheek. “Why?” she screamed, and your husband scoffed. “What have I done?”

“You implied that Y/N is property. That, Fruszi, was a warning. As for you.” Your husband pressed a kiss to your cheek and whispered for you to look away as he unwound his arms from your body. “Not only did I witness you forcing your attentions on one of my soldiers, I witnessed you forcing your attentions on my wife. And I do not take such an offense lightly.”

With another flick of his wrist a nichevo’ya surged forth and attacked, tearing Androv’s head from his body, his face permanently etched into a scream. Aleksander immediately took you back into his arms, holding you close. “Let this be a lesson,” he said, addressing his Grisha. “To those who would try to disrespect my wife, and to those who attempt to force themselves upon anyone else.”

Aleksander lifted you into his arms and carried you from the room, his nichevo’ya trailing obediently behind. When you were back in your rooms, he gently sat on the bed, keeping you in his lap. “My love, are you alright?” he asked, looking you over for any sign of injury. “I’m so sorry, I should have known, I should have taken care of him before.” “I’m alright,” you said, sniffling. “Shaken, but alright. He was really just irritating until…”

“That will never happen again,” your husband vowed. “I’m so sorry, Y/N, I’m so sorry that you had to endure that.” Aleksander pulled you close, and you let yourself drown in his embrace. “You were there,” you whispered, kissing his collarbones, where your head rested. “He didn’t hurt me, and you were there.” Your husband squeezed his eyes shut, resting his forehead against yours.

“I love you so much, my Y/N,” he whispered, and you pressed your lips to his. With your kiss, you felt some of the tension drain out of him, and you wrapped your arms around his neck. “I will do everything within my power to protect you.” “I know you will, Aleksander,” you replied, kissing him again. “I love you.” In a perfect world, Aleksander would be at your side constantly, defending you from any and every threat.

But this was not a perfect world: he was at war, his people were fractured, his resources were spread thin. It simply wasn’t possible to protect you from everything, especially from the people he thought he could trust, the people he thought were on his side. But what Aleksander could do, he would. He would ensure his soldiers knew who you were; that you were to be respected and to be protected. He would have his nichevo’ya follow you, to alert him to any imminent threat. And while it wouldn’t protect you, he would love you–he would love you so fiercely and completely that you might just forget about the war raging on your doorstep.

#aleksander morozova x reader #shadow and bone fanfiction #the darkling x reader #general kirigan x reader #shadow and bone reader insert

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hottpinkpenguin · 1 year

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kirigan one shot, where the reader(fem) treats his face wounds and he feels at ease becuz for some reason her gift releases him from his pain, he cries(sobbing)all leading up to a very sad yet soft, fluffy end. as much as I hate him, I feel like the man just desperately needs a hug from someone

A/n: he really does need a hug, and i totally volunteer. thanks for the request anon!!

Darkling X Grisha GN!Reader Word Count: 2769 Warnings: mild mentions of blood

You held your hands over the boy’s ghastly leg wound, the flesh underneath stitching itself together slowly. His broken, chesty sobs slowed as you poured your gift onto his wound. You felt the toll an entire day of healing was taking on you, but the boy on the stretcher beneath you was too young to turn away. His blue eyes softened as you heard the bone snap back into place, his ankle turning to its correct angle. You focused, your head beginning to ring and swim with exhaustion as you channeled the Small Science down to his leg. Nearby, you heard his parents begin to pray over you, his mother weeping noisily.

When the wound was completely closed up and the worst of the bruising faded, you dropped your hands and let go of the grip on your powers. You had to steady yourself on the edge of the bed to keep from falling. Your vision was dotted with white, your ears sounded like they’d been filled with cotton. You heard your cousin Donovan usher the family out of your Healer’s tent as the parents profusely thanked him, trying to offer him their money, a goat, and whatever precious items that could think of.

You sank onto the bed, dabbing at the sweat on your brow as you fought off a wave of dizziness. Your breath was ragged like you’d just run for miles. The destruction left by the group of mercenaries that had torn through the bordertown had felt never ending, but you were grateful to know the boy was the last person who’d need your services. You’d need to sleep for days to recover.

“Y/n, there’s one more.”

You could hear the apology in Donovan’s voice when he spoke. He’d poked his head in through the tent flap, dark bags under his eyes.

You shook your head, guilt-ridden. “Donovan, I can’t, I’m sorry. Please ask one of the other Healers.”

“He asked for you specifically.” Something about Donovan’s voice grabbed you. You looked at him, questions swirling in your eyes. He only tilted his head at you meaningfully before stepping aside.

A tall man clad in dark robes stepped into your tent. His eyes were so dark you couldn’t see his pupils, his hair the color of obsidian, with four ragged black scars traversing his handsome face. Something about him was so… familiar.

You tried to rise from the bed, but your legs wobbled and you felt yourself pitch forward.

The stranger reacted quickly and agilely, leaping forward to catch you before you hit the ground.

“You’re exhausted,” he observed. His voice sounded dark and heavy with a sorrow that hovered around him like a fog.

He helped you back onto the cot, its surface damp with sweat and blood from the day’s patients. The dark-eyed stranger looked around the tent, surveying the scene with intent eyes. Finally, his gaze found yours again.

“I’m sorry to have bothered you,” he announced gallantly. “I can see you’ve done enough for one day.”

He turned, his black robes whirling around him with a dramatic flourish. You caught a fleeting glance of his side profile: a straight nose, strong jaw, dark brows framing darker eyes. Proud mouth with a slight downturn at the corners.

General Kirigan.

Recognition slammed into you like a freight train. You’d only seen him once before and from afar, but you’d never forget. But he was dead, wasn’t he? Your mind went blank for a moment as you watched him move towards the open flap on your tent.

“Wait!”

He hesitated at the edge of your tent, half turning back to you.

“General?” Your voice was small and questioning.

He turned fully back to you, the lamplight illuminating those ghastly scars across his face. The flesh at the seam of the wounds was discolored, as if the marks were poisoned. You’d never seen scars like that before.

He gave you a small, bashful smile, dropping his gaze.

“Aleksander will do nicely,” he answered you. It was him.

“But… the Fold? We… I thought you were dead…” Your voice trailed off as you realized how silly you sounded. Why should General Kirigan care what an untrained Healer at the edge of Ravka thought of his fate?

But, much to your surprise, he walked back towards you with a polite smile, his courtly manners on full display.

“For a moment, so did I.” The smile turned sour on his lips, leaving behind a mangled looking grimace. You felt his heartbeat stutter in his chest, your powers attuned to him like a magnet. You tried to find something to say, your mind still reeling from the shock of finding Ravka’s most famous Grisha in your lowly tent.

Whatever momentary reverie he’d been swept up in, he surfaced quickly and regained his footing. The flash of pain you’d seen in his expression smoothed back into a mask of graciousness.

“But, as you can see, I survived. Although… these scars.” His hand came to his face, barely touching the largest, deepest gash that stretched from his right temple across his nose and down the smooth plane of his left cheek. He winced at the contact, however light. “They… pain me. I was told your powers are… up to the task.”

You blinked dumbly for a moment as his words sank in.

“You… came here for me?” The notion seemed impossible, but the Black General nodded.

“I did.” No explanation, no answer to the million questions running through your head. You wondered where to start. What to ask.

You hesitated a few moments before you realized you were talking to a patient. The famed Shadow Summoner, yes. But a patient still.

You stood quickly from the cot, adrenaline surging through your exhausted body just enough to keep you upright. You had the wherewithal to be embarrassed by the conditions of the tent. You yanked the stained sheets off the cot, balling them in your hands.

“I’m so sorry,” you spluttered, shoving the sheets into a corner of the tent. You had no new ones to add to the cot, and very little in the way of creature comforts to offer to notable guests. For his part, the General didn’t seem to mind, his eyes following you as you bustled about, straightening the pillows on the bare mattress and trying to brush down the stray hairs that had broken loose from your braids, curling at the temples from the humid summer night and your own exertion.

“There’s nothing to apologize for,” he assured you kindly. You beckoned to the mattress once it was as presentable as you could make it. Aleksander sat on it without hesitation, that same genteel smile on his handsome face. “There’s often no time for the niceties when our powers are needed.”

Your curiosity was piqued by his comment, but you were too flustered to ask anything of it. He adjusted on the squeaky mattress, remaining upright with his hands clasped in his lap. You pulled a stool over from the corner of the tent and placed it next to his right leg, balancing your weight on it.

“What needs healing?” you asked, retreating to your role of Healer in order to escape your own embarrassment.

He gestured to the scars again. You swallowed thickly, examining them carefully and trying to avoid his gaze. He studied you intently, his expression calm and unreadable.

“I’ve never seen scars like this,” you admitted. “I don’t know how to heal these.”

He nodded, a flicker of disappointment in his eyes. “They are from a Volcra,” he offered by way of explanation, noting the shock on your face. “I do indeed doubt that you’ve seen scars like these before. Whether your gifts work or not, I would be much obliged if you were to try.”

You nodded earnestly, wiping your hands on the front of the nurses apron you wore. Although you didn’t use the conventional tools of a doctor, you found that people trusted you when you looked more like what they expected. You’d never been trained as a Grisha for the Second Army anyways, so you had no red Kefta to wear like the Healers of Kirigan’s ranks.

You let your mind loosen its grip on the nerves as you felt yourself sink into the role of Healer. Kirigan nodded at you, sensing the change in tone as you lifted your hands to the side of his face.

You tapped into the well of your powers that sat at the center of your chest. You had to reach deep, your reserves sapped from the day. But you felt it, the warm energy of the Small Science, and grasped it. With effortful concentration, you pushed the energy up into your shoulders and down the length of your arms into your palms and fingers. Then, you launched it into the space between your fingertips and the General’s face, allowing the Small Science to do the rest. For several moments, nothing happened. The black scars stared back at you unchanged. You dug deeper, pulling all the healing energy you could find buried in you and forcing it into your hands. You were trembling by the end of it, the attempt completely draining you.

“Here. Let me help you.” You watched with confusion as Aleksander lifted his hands from his lap, until his fingertips barely touched your exposed wrists. As his skin made contact with yours, you felt a new dimension of energy open up to you. Like you’d been standing on the other side of a veil, the force of your powers tripled in a surge of warmth.

You struggled with the extra effort of channeling the new powers, your concentration narrowing to nothing but your hands and the scars. You felt the power pulse with the inhale and exhale of your own breath, and after a few surges you began to see the skin around Aleksander’s scars start to mend itself. Like wind wiping away ridges in sand, the scars slowly shrunk, one excruciating millimeter at a time.

Even with whatever added power Aleksander had gifted you by his touch, you felt your body begin to tire. Your head started to pound, your eyelids becoming heavy.

Aleksander must have noticed too, because he very gently pulled your hands away from his face after a few more moments of effort. When the distance between your hands and his face was too great for your powers to traverse, you felt your body crumple in an exhausted heap on the stool. You let your head hang heavy, your chest heaving. You closed your eyes, breathing through the dull roar in your ears.

You weren’t sure how long passed - probably only a few breaths. Your awareness came back slowly. You slowly lifted your head, your eyes coming to focus on Aleksander’s face. He hadn’t moved from his seat on the bare mattress at the center of the tent, and you noted with a swell of pride that his scars were noticeably smaller and less disfiguring.

It took you a second to realize that there were tears pooling in his dark eyes. One loosed itself and traced a slow trail down his unmarred cheek. He was looking at you with a mixture of awe and gratitude, a new smile on his lips.

“What was that?” you asked bluntly, looking at his hands. “What did you do?”

“Nothing you couldn’t do yourself,” he replied cryptically. His voice sounded lighter. “I just gave you a boost to reach the full strength of your powers.”

You couldn’t hazard a guess as to what that meant, or how to interpret what you’d just experienced. Your attention was turning elsewhere as another tear sprang free from his eyes.

“Normally people stop crying after I’ve healed them,” you observed quietly. “Have I hurt you?”

His expression turned somber and serious, the gentle smile melting from his lips.

“No, y/n. You didn’t hurt me. Quite the opposite, actually. I can’t remember the last time I felt this way. I feel almost… free.”

You weren’t sure if it was the fatigue or the weight in Aleksander’s voice, but your heart ached at his words. Acting on an instinct, you leaned forward and brushed away a teardrop with your thumb against his jawline. You pulled back hesitantly, afraid you’d crossed a line. Aleksander’s hand caught yours. You felt your powers rumbling in response to whatever magic lived in his skin, your heart skipping a beat as he held your hand to his cheek.

“I’d ask if we could stay a while. Please.”

You swallowed, uncertain for a moment. You could only imagine what Donovan and the other Healers you traveled with along the Ravkan border would think. Donovan certainly would have told everyone within earshot about who was in your tent by now, if they hadn’t seen the Black General themselves. What would they think if he lingered too long?

You watched as Aleksander’s expression turned from pleading to naked desperation and immediately made your decision. You nodded, unable to deny him a small comfort he so desperately needed.

His eyes fluttered closed as he nodded gratefully. “Thank you,” he breathed out, nuzzling his cheek against the palm of your hand. “No need to go further,” he added, following your train of thought to the questions you were too afraid to ask. “I’m not asking for your body. Just your presence.”

You felt yourself relax as the sincerity of Aleksander’s words wrapped around you. You let your thumb stroke gently back and forth along the plane of his cheek. His eyes were still closed, and you saw him continue to breathe deeply.

“What brought you here?” you asked cautiously after a few moments of quiet.

His eyes opened gently, and you were once again struck by how very dark his irises were.

“I found myself in need of a Healer with skills beyond just mending flesh. Rumor of your talents reached me. And I was…” His voice trailed off, his eyes glazing over as he became lost in thought for a moment. “I was out of options. These scars aren’t the only wounds I suffered in the Fold.”

You nodded as if you understood, although in truth you didn’t. You’d heard from some of your past patients that you were more than just a Healer, but you never knew what to make of those statements, so you’d always dismissed them as expressions of gratitude. Most of your patients were otkazat'sya - non-Grisha - so it was particularly easy to explain away their superstitions about your powers. To hear it from the Black General made your mind reel. You tried to tamp down the selfish part of you that was itching to ask more.

“I’m glad I could help,” you stammered out blandly. Aleksander sighed, leaning against your hand for one more moment before he smiled and began to rise from the cot.

“I won’t keep you, I can see how exhausted you are.” You rose along with him, trailing after him like a nervous puppy as he made to move towards the tent flap.

“Those scars aren’t completely healed,” you observed. “I could accompany you, General. If you’d like.” You were astounded by your own boldness, and you weren’t sure if you offered because of how devastatingly handsome he was or because you sensed how deeply he needed your powers.

He hesitated at the edge of your tent, turning back to face you with a pained look of regret on his face.

“A kind offer,” he replied softly. “But one I can’t accept, I’m afraid.”

You interrupted his exit again, a restless energy inside you imploring him not to leave. “Why not?”

He didn’t stop this time, although you heard his quiet answer perfectly clear. “I have a knack for ruining beautiful things, and I would not wish such a fate on you.”

General Kirigan vanished into the warm summer night like a shadow. His visit had been so fleeting and unusual that you questioned whether you’d dreamt the whole thing in some sort of exhausted fever dream. It wasn’t until the following week, when you received a fresh set of bedsheets and new nurse’s apron from a mysterious donor, that you began to believe your own memory. There was a note tucked into the sheets, written on crisp parchment paper in the darkest ink you’d ever seen:

For the healer who mends more than what can be seen

You saved the note, if only to prove to yourself that it hadn’t been a dream after all…

#darkling imagine #darkling #darkling fanfiction #darkling shadow and bone #darkling x reader #darkling x you #the darkling #general kirigan imagine #general kirigan #aleksander morozova angst #aleksander morozova x reader #aleksander morozova imagine #aleksander morovoza #shadow and bone imagine #shadow and bone fanfiction #shadow and bone #darkling requests #shadow and bone requests

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readerinsertsaremyguiltypleasure · 1 year

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Congratulations on 500 followers!!!

Could you do something with K and 13 for Darkling? I have this thought in mind he is married to the reader and they got in a fight or something or probably have been separated for a while now but are longing for each other. And somehow have been put in a situation where they are forced to share a bed. Could you make it a hea please?

Thank you very much!!!

One angsty Darkling fic with a happy ending coming right up.

K. Only one bed 13. ‘What happened to us?’

-----------------------------------------

It was only one night, you reminded yourself as you pulled your small trunk through the halls of the inn. You were in Ryevost on a job investigating a local people smuggling ring. Not usually a job for the Second Army, but the smugglers in question were rumoured to have been helping the drüskelle kidnap Grisha, and so there you were.

And so was he.

General Kirigan had taken this particular crime personally, and had decided to oversee the investigation himself, joining you, Ivan, and Fedyor.

The problem wasn’t that he had come on the trip, though it had made for an awkward coach ride. No, the problem was that the inn only had two rooms available. Obviously, Ivan and Fedyor had taken one, which left you and Kirigan to share the other. That was the problem

Not too long ago, things would have been different. In fact, you and Aleksander sharing a room would have been pre-decided. But that was when you were still married. Now the idea of sharing a personal space just felt hollow.

You had been separated for a few months now, and you had given up hope of reconciliation. You had left quietly after another night alone, leaving nothing but a note telling Aleksander that you had secured other rooms in the palace and would be taking more missions away. He had not come after you.

‘This is us,’ said Aleksander, unlocking the door at the very end of the hall. He held it open and let you enter first.

You mumbled your thanks as you passed him, but then immediately stopped short. There was only one bed. Which, of course there was only one bed… but for some reason you had expected there to be two.

‘I doubt I’ll sleep,’ said Aleksander, shutting the door behind him. ‘You have the bed.’

‘Are you sure?’ You may not have been what you once were to each other, but you still had your manners. There was no need to be rude.

Aleksander nodded, a soft smile on his lips.

That smile had no right to be there. He didn’t get to smile at you like that – like he still loved you – not after all these months alone.

So, you ignored it and decided to get unpacked. You had just placed your trunk on the bed when a cold draft hit you, making you shiver.

Great. Just what you needed.

Thankfully, this was one problem that could be fixed, and with a flick of your wrists, you sent a fireball into the fireplace, lighting the kindling.

‘Much better,’ you said to yourself.

A soft chuckle came from behind you, and you turned to see Aleksander watching you from the doorway. You hated how attractive you still found him. That smirk had always been you undoing.

‘You always did hate the cold,’ he said, nodding to the fireplace. You had lit the one in his rooms the same way many times before.

You shrugged and went back to your unpacking. ‘Some things never change, I guess.’

‘And yet some things change so suddenly,’ he said. He was no longer smiling.

He slowly walked towards you, as if he was scared you would run. ‘Milaya…’ You closed your eyes, tears threatening to spill at the sound of him calling you that. ‘What happened to us? Why did you leave?’

‘Why did you wait so long to ask?’ you shot back, anger overriding the pain. ‘And it wasn’t sudden, Aleksander. You left me long before I left you.’

Aleksander stopped his advance but did not refute your claim. He knew what you meant.

‘The war…’ he started but you cut across him.

‘I know how important the war is. I know it’s more important than I am.’ You sniffed and wiped away the solitary tear that had fallen down your cheek. ‘Just because I know it, doesn’t mean I want to be reminded of it every night when I go to bed alone. Or every morning when I wake up without the person who should be there.’

A few more tears fell, and you quickly wiped them away. This was exactly why sharing a room was a problem. It reminded you of what you had lost.

Suddenly, Aleksander’s hands were on your cheeks. You tried to move away, but he held firm. ‘I thought you didn’t love me anymore,’ he said, wiping a tear away with his thumb.

‘I don’t,’ you said, though you both knew it was a lie.

‘I thought you didn’t love me,’ he repeated. ‘That’s why I didn’t come knocking down your door the moment I found your note, begging you to give me another chance. The war is important, yes… but nothing is more important to me than you are. Certainly not my own heartbreak. So, I let you go because I thought that’s what you wanted.’

‘All I wanted was you,’ you said, openly crying now. ‘It hurt too much to keep losing you to the war.’

Aleksander leaned his head down to rest against yours and closed his eyes. ‘Give me another chance,’ he whispered. ‘I know I’m far too late, but please, milaya. Let me show you how important you are.’

You reached up stroke his bearded cheek. It was a lot more unkept than you remembered it, though still within the standards for a General. ‘Promise me you’ll make time for us,’ you said. ‘I don’t need you by my side every moment of every day, but I need something, Aleksander. I’m your wife.’

Aleksander’s eyes snapped open, alight with hope. ‘I’ll give you as much time as you want,’ he said without hesitation. ‘I’ll give anything.’

You could tell that he meant every word, which was what made you lean forward to bring your lips to his.

It started as a soft kiss, one that tested the waters after so long apart, but Aleksander soon deepened it. He kissed you like a man possessed, desperate to make the most of something he may never get again. You felt all his hope, guilt, and longing, and so you gave him all your emotions in return. All your pain, all your heartbreak.

And all your love.

You had no idea how long you stood there, lost in each other, but eventually you had to come up for air. ‘Move back in with me,’ he said, still breathless. ‘I’ve missed you so much.’

You realised you could be setting yourself up for more heartache, but you just couldn’t ignore what your heart was telling you.

You smiled softly and nodded.

‘I’ve missed you, too.’

#darkling x reader #darkling x you #the darkling x reader #darkling prompts #general kirigan x reader #aleksander morozova x reader

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swanimagines · 2 months

Text

NOT A FAILURE | CROWS, MAL, ALINA

Summary: Imagine helping Mal and the Crows free Alina.

“This is a bad idea,” you mumbled, mainly to yourself as you held your gun close to your chest, sitting down on the floor in the corner Mal sat on the crate above you, letting out a breath.

“Well… we promised to rescue Alina, and that we’ll do,” Mal replied, closing his eyes for a minute, listening to the Darkling ramble something on the deck. His words were muffled and unintelligible, you couldn’t make sense of them. Mal took in a deep breath. “I wish I could punch his teeth into his throat, one by one.”

You and Mal had narrowly snuck into the skiff where Alina was held - vowing to release her even if it took your own life. Immediately after getting on, you had made your way to the ship’s hold, hoping to hide there until time came.

But of course luck wasn’t on your side, and soon you heard how someone was entering the hold. You and Mal exchanged a panicked look, before you dove to hide between the crates - Mal went to the other side while you stayed on your own side.

“Kirigan has the Sun Summoner chained on the deck,” someone said, and you and Mal glanced at each other across the hold.

“Saints, I have a bad feeling about this…” another male voice groaned, and suddenly you caught movement from where Mal had just been hiding. You didn’t even have time to react before Mal was already gone, making you panic.

“We’ll might have to threaten her life,” the first guy said and then you heard a collective “what?!”

“Who’s this?” the same voice from earlier said.

“Stowaway,” a woman murmured, making you peek from around one of the crates, your eyes widening at the sight of Mal, held by a Suli girl. “He was hiding over there. Why this particular skiff?”

They were all glaring at Mal, and that’s when you jumped up, pointing a gun at the Suli girl. Your hands shook, you felt how you were sweating, but you still managed to give an order.

“L-let him go, or… or I’ll shoot e-everyone,” you stuttered, flinching when a Zemeni man pulled out two revolvers, pointing them at you.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you, sweetheart,” he replied, and you pointed your gun at him, now your hands were shaking even more. It was painfully obvious how you had never shot to kill anyone.

“Don’t,” Mal mumbled, shaking his head at you. You looked between him and the three others, before slowly lowering your gun.

You swallowed, putting your gun back into its holster, the Zemeni man doing the same. Your eyes flickered between the two men. “If you’re here to hurt Alina-”

“We aren’t,” the Suli woman replied, glaring at the man with a cane, and he looked back at her, sighing.

“Of course we wouldn’t hurt her, she’s too valuable,” he replied, tightening the grip on his cane. “But threatening to hurt her could make Kirigan do as we say.”

You and Mal snorted, and you rolled your eyes. “You haven’t seen him in action, have you? He’d cut you in half with his shadow blade powers the moment you say anything about hurting her, and you won’t have much space to run on this skiff if you haven’t noticed.”

The two men stared at you and Mal for a moment, before the guy with a cane nodded at the Suli girl. “Give him his gun.”

“Why?”

“Because if he’s not with Kirigan, he’s with us.”

The Suli girl gave Mal his gun back, and you moved to stand beside him. “We should attack as soon as possible.”

“No, we wait,” the man with a cane countered.

Mal scoffed. “For what? The bold move is to attack now.”

“And the smart one is to wait.”

Mal shrugged. “Well, I don’t feel like being smart right now.”

Then he turned, going for the stairs and you took a look at your three allies before going after him. You were soon followed by the Suli girl, who climbed to the top deck so fast and so silently that you barely caught a sight of her. Mal began to shoot at Kirigan the moment you got through the people obscuring the view, but was on the ground a moment after, leaving you alone and you hid behind the wall. The Zemeni man and the other guy emerged from the hatchet then, and Darkling tried to cut them in half as soon as the Zemeni started to shoot him, and then the Zemeni was knocked out and everything became dark.

You held your gun close to your chest again, trying to coax yourself, sneak out and try to fight. You knew Alina was in trouble and without anyone to help her, all would be lost. You sat there, hearing occasional shuffles and volcras screaming above you, trying to win your fear. You shuddered.

You are a failure, Yakov’s voice laughed in your head. Good for nothing else than cowering in fear when others fight.

That man was built like a bull, with a long beard and shaved head, and he had belittled you from the start, used his power as a spare commander, made others laugh at you - everyone wondering why you were in an army when you didn’t even have guts to shoot anyone. And it was true, it wasn’t your place. You were good in deflecting hits and dodging, but fighting, with you being the aggressor - it had never been your thing. But if you hadn’t signed up, you would have been separated from Alina and Mal, your best and only friends. For them, you would have done anything. At least you thought so.

You are not a failure, something inside you said, and you stood up. Show them.

Then, you walked out from the darkness and shot one of the heartrenders, the bullet going in from between his eyes, splattering blood on the Darkling. You smirked, and sprinted up the stairs, your heart pounding, your adrenaline running. You joined the Suli girl fighting a volcra, and you felt like something within you had awakened.

Then, suddenly, a burst of light emerged, all the volcras near you turning to dust, and you immediately looked down to see Alina standing there. Then suddenly Mal had tackled The Darkling off the ship and you hurried down, but were stopped halfway down by the Suli girl as one of the Heartrenders started to slow down Alina’s heart. You aimed your gun at the heartrender again, and pressed the trigger.

Click. Click.

The bullets were out.

“Damn it!” you cursed, watching helplessly as Alina struggled, trying to look for a way to stop it. And then the saving grace blessed the ship, the Zemeni man had woken up and fought with the Heartrender, ultimately pushing him off the ship.

You ran to an unconscious Alina, trying to shake her awake as volcras flew closer and closer to you, and Mal soon joined you. Alina mumbled your names after a moment and you let out a breath, tipping backwards on your butt. “Saints.”

Then, it was light again, and on next moment you were out of the Fold.

“The Darkling?” you asked Mal, and he looked back to the Fold.

“Gone. Volcras got him,” he replied, stroking Alina’s hair while you gripped her hand.

“The world’s better without him,” Alina mumbled weakly, sitting up with your and Mal’s help.

You turned your eyes at the two men and the Suli girl, nodding in gratitude. “We couldn’t have done it without you,” you told them. “We don’t even know each other, and you were willing to help. I just can’t figure out why.”

Alina blinked, looking at them and chuckled a little. “They tried to kidnap me some days ago.”

Mal frowned, looking between Alina and the three strangers. “What?”

“No, we are not kidnapping you, not anymore,” the Suli girl reassured, looking at her friends.

“Well, it would be rude to save you and then kidnap you, and… you being a Saint and all…” the Zemeni man agreed, and the other man with a cane clenched his jaw. “Oh, we haven’t introduced ourselves, this grumpy man here is Kaz, yours truly is Jesper, and this lovely lady is Inej.”

You just stared at them, not really knowing what to make of that bunch. But you agreed to walk with them so you would be able to put on a campfire, just to warm up. And there, Alina made a deal with Kaz, he got a jewel necklace and in return, he wouldn’t tell where do you three go from there.

But you had a feeling that someway, somehow, you’d meet them again soon…

---

Requests are always open! FANDOM LIST | PROMPT LIST(S) | RULES (READ!!!)

#shadow and bone x reader #mal oretsev x reader #alina starkov x reader #kaz brekker x reader #jesper fahey x reader #inej ghafa x reader #mal oretsev #alina starkov #jesper fahey #inej ghafa #kaz brekker #sab #shadow and bone #reader insert #gn reader #my works

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savethegrishaverse · 26 days

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Here is the Transcript to the Questions Answered by Eric Heisserer!

Recently, we were very fortunate that Shadow and Bone showrunner Eric Heisserer agreed to answer some fan questions! Below is the transcript of the screenshots that have been previously shared—not an entirely new interview. The transcript in this format should be much more accessible and convenient, particularly for anyone using a screen reader.

To make it easier to read through Eric’s responses, we’ve nested his answers below coordinating questions.

Okay, taking these one at a time -- because some of these will have very long answers, and I may have to return at later intervals to answer them: (note: questions will be in bold)

"I'd like to know if there's a way to liberate the pre-written scripts if Netflix doesn't plan on using them" - Asked by Christian Thalmann, the creator of the Fjerdan language.

"There is a way to liberate the Crows scripts from Netflix, yes, and in fact that would be part of the buyout for another streamer when acquiring the rights to Leigh's novels. It would be a package deal."

"In my view, "The Crows" have the potential to revitalize the Grishaverse. Unlike "Shadow And Bone," this new show could rely less on elaborate visual effects and offer a fresh narrative angle. Heist-themed shows are currently in high demand, adding to its appeal. Am I mistaken in thinking that our focus should primarily be on "The Crows"? The likelihood of "Shadow And Bone" returning seems slim, but l've always believed that "The Crows" had a greater chance of success." - asked by fellow fan Joleen

The focus on the Crows is helpful in two ways -- first, those scripts are written, which lets us get a running start at production, and second, just from casual analysis of book sales, it's far more popular worldwide than other Grishaverse titles. So it will be a bigger draw for viewers.

The trap though is the cost. It's more grounded than S&B, sure, but the Ice Court is a unique location that either requires a really costly set build, or set extensions and VFX work to make it look authentic, which means nearly every shot of the heist once our crew gets there could be a VFX shot.

My guess is the budget would be on par with S2 of S&B.

"If/when the spinoff is back (finger crossed) was there anything he had planned that would completely surprised, for good reasons obviously, the audience. And we should hold our breath for that twist/turn?" - asked by fellow fan Rti

Yes, there is a surprise or two in the Crows spinoff season, but overall it's as close to the novel as we could make it. And Leigh's novel is such an amazing story with natural cliffhangers that work as episode "out" moments, etc. I think the biggest move we made was to feature every single Crow's backstory to go with their episode. So that was fun/sad/exciting.

"What was the difficulties you mentioned about filming Season 2 in that Reddit comment? Don't want to sound negative but what went wrong?!" - asked by fellow fan Mitra

S2 kept throwing challenges at us, and it started long before we got to production. Like months earlier, when we learned the location we used for the Little Palace in S1 was closed to us due to the pandemic. So right there we lost out on a ton of S&S scenes, because it wouldn't be a match. But we also had written a compelling side arc for Ivan and Fedyor in S2, these two Grisha trapped on either side of the civil war. Each of them played a big role in the story, but Simon (Ivan) had a feature film that overlapped with our schedule and couldn't move, which meant we lost him. So Daegan worked to revise the season keeping Fedyor and leaving Ivan as most likely dead from the end of S1. He was Kirigan's right-hand man for the season. But poor Julian caught COVID just when we were to shoot out most of his scenes, and after trying to make the schedule work, we had to come to the brutal truth that there wasn't a way to keep Fedyor in the story. Our only option was to bring him in at like episode 8, which would've been too little, too late.

COVID continued to be a monster all through production, requiring us to juggle schedules and miss out on days, and it was madness for the cast, who had to pivot with almost no notice whenever someone was ill and quarantined. This isn't unique to our show of course -- it happened with everyone. It's just a challenge.

Beyond that, we had been given the go to write a special standalone story, The Demon in the Wood. This would have been released on its own around Christmas, like a BBC special but for Netflix, and would help bridge seasons 1 and 2 by showing a little of what Kirigan was doing before we see him in 52, and also provide more character context, etc. Christina Strain wrote that and did great work adapting Leigh's short story. But it never went the distance.

There was a lot more to 52 as well, scenes and side stories and little interactions that were lost due to budget or time restrictions. Again, not unique to our show, but agonizing all the same, since what you get is not what we had written, or in some cases even shot.

I'm incredibly proud of the cast and the team, and Daegan did the heaviest lifting while I was off finishing the Crows writing room. But we had a lot more thrown at us.

"How long was the sizzle reel ready to go but he had to keep it secret?" - Asked by members of the Discord Team

That sizzle reel was put together about four months before the second season dropped.

"I would love to know his perspective on the impact of streaming on storytelling. Would we have had to launch a campaign like this 10-15 years ago for a show like this? What are the main pain points when it comes to streaming models & telling unique, diverse stories?" - asked by fellow fan Acorn_Bri

Streaming is a challenge to serialized storytelling in that it looks at 'content often with a different agenda and uses metrics that can take a creative issue and exacerbate it. Like in broadcast, if viewership and thus ad revenue has slightly declined, the show will need to find a way to make their 22 or 13 episodes on a proportionally smaller budget. What is not done is reduce episode order. But if a streaming series underperforms or doesn't meet expectations, and the streamer doesn't cancel it outright, the go-to budget reduction idea is to reduce episode order for the next season.

When you just have 8 episodes and continue to deal with notes to compress, pace up, or omit for what you'd scripted for a longer season, reducing further to six or four episodes is exhausting.

This happens due to a slide in autonomy from what the showrunner position had been. What the chatter on the picket lines revealed to us is that most showrunners today don't get to see their own show's budget, and thus don't get the freedom to make budgetary decisions that could better protect the story they're telling. More and more, showrunners not at a legacy network aren't the final say or at times even involved in hiring key roles. I don't have any ideas that aren't already in a contract language, I just see how the job on this side has gotten harder and there isn't much of a way for us to make it easier for each other like we could with having writers on set or in post production, because the streaming model has made that impossible.

—

Once again, we would like to give a big thank you to everyone who asked their questions, and an even BIGGER thank you to Eric Heisserer for answering them!

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cheekygreenty · 1 year

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Revival

Dear readers,

In the wake of season 2 of shadow and bone premiering in two weeks, this author has made the decision to revive this blog and let their creative juices flow. Let requests, smut and angst begin.

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rose-sophia-isabella-rogers · 2 months

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Worth the Risk: Chapter I - Before

Chapter Summary: You've known Anakin ever since you were a youngling. It was hard to see one of you without the other. It's different when the Clone Wars start. But then, you're finally paired together for a mission and you're almost always together again. However, an argument after you almost die, may ruin your relationship. Or maybe it will do something completely else?

Pairing: Anakin Skywalker/Reader

Characters: Anakin Skywalker, Reader, Shaak Ti (only mentioned), Obi-Wan Kenobi, Yoda, Mace Windu, Ahsoka Tano, Rex, Jesse, Sketcher, Bunker, R2-D2

Word Count: 4338

A/N: This was supposed to be a one-shot. Once again, I'm proving myself I can't write those. Oh well. Anyway, I've got into "Star Wars" a few months ago and this is the result. I haven't watched everything yet, but I couldn't stop myself. I hope you will enjoy this. Happy reading! P.S.: The gif is not mine! Same as the Star Wars franchise. Nor you, for that matter. Oh, and I didn't know if the people on the tag list wanted to be only in my fanfictions about Aleksander Kirigan or in all my works. So, I address you guys now: if you're not into the Star Wars or this pairing, let me know in the comments and I will remove you from the tag list and won't tag you in the next chapter.

Tag list (let me know if you want to be added or removed):

@intothesoul

@mizelophsun11

@pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy

@zeeader

@marrymonrich

@wonderland2425

@chelseyyouraverageluigi

@thehufflepuffavenger1

@drinix

@astro-kitty-launch

Anakin Skywalker has been your best friend since you were little. When he arrived to the Jedi Temple, the rumors about him being the Chosen One quickly spread. Other younglings were a bit afraid of him or treated him as someone amazing already. You were having none of that. During your first training together, you beat him up. He may be the one to save you all, but you were here longer. He was not going to get any special treatment from you.

However, after the training was finished, you hurried to him and took him on a tour of the Jedi Temple. You didn't want to treat him like he was better than you, but you didn't want him to be your enemy either. He was a kid, like you. And you could tell he appreciated that.

Ever since that, you spent every free moment together. Everyone knew that wherever you two showed up, chaos followed. He was advancing quicker in the Order, but you were an apt student and were close behind. After the Initiate Trails you were honored to be chosen by Master Shaak Ti. She's a good mentor and you really valued everything she had to teach you.

Then, the Clone Wars started. Your Master was asked to oversee the Clone production and training. You accompanied her and also took part in some battles, sent as a Commander. Soon after, you took your Jedi Trials and the Council granted you the title of the Jedi Knight. It was time to leave your Master and become a General of the Grand Army of the Republic. Of course, Anakin has been one already for some time, having passed his trials before you.

Because of the war, you and Skywalker have been spending less time together. But wherever you two manage to meet, you always try to take the most of it. But for some reason, the Council have never asked you to go to the battle together. Until now.

Anakin is walking through the Jedi Temple with Obi-Wan Kenobi and Master Yoda. They're discussing the new mission Skywalker has been given. He needs to free another planet from the Separatists.

'Don't worry, Master Yoda,' he says, as they exit the Temple. 'Obi-Wan and I will not fail you.'

'Go with you, Obi Wan cannot,' Yoda says, surprising them both. 'A different task, he has. Send someone else with you, we will.'

'Who?' Anakin asks, frowning. At the same moment they notice Master Mace Windu approaching with you. He's saying something to you and you nod, absolutely concentrated. Until your eyes fall on your best friend. Then, you grin. He does the same. But Obi-Wan's face falls.

'Master Yoda, are you sure about this?' he asks. 'The two of them together…'

'What is needed to save this planet, exactly is,' Yoda finishes.

'We'll be fine, Obi-Wan,' Anakin says, already heading your way. Kenobi sighs.

'This is gonna end badly,' he murmurs. 'Or at least in an explosion.'

You and Anakin meet halfway. At once you start talking strategy amatively. Windu passes you and joins other Masters, eyeing you skeptically.

'Are we sure about this?' he asks. 'There is a reason why we haven't paired them up together for a mission. They tend to be… destructive together.'

'To put it lightly,' Obi-Wan adds. But Yoda smiles.

'Trust them, we must,' he says. 'Powerful together, they are. Win the battle, they will.'

And so, an hour later you're at the docks, getting ready to board the Resolute, Anakin's Venator-class Star Destroyer. Anakin's Clone Legion, 501st, is to join you, same as yours, 98th. They greet each other and chat, waiting for you and Anakin to declare you're ready to fly. Ahsoka Tano, Skywalker's padawan, stands a bit to the side, talking with Captain Rex, one of the clones.

'Ahsoka, do me a favor and keep an eye on these two,' Obi-Wan says, glancing at you and Anakin.

'Why?' Tano asks, puzzled.

'Wherever they go together, chaos follows,' Kenobi explains and pats Rex on the shoulder. 'Good luck to you all.'

'Thank you, sir,' the Clone says, already fearing his future.

'All set?' Anakin asks, joining the group.

'We were waiting just for you,' Ahsoka answers and smiles at you, as you approach them. 'And [Y/N]. Hi!'

'Hey,' you say, grinning at the young padawan. 'Shall we?'

'Let's destroy some droids,' Skywalker says, smirking at you. You smirk back and board the ship with him.

'May the force be with you,' Obi-Wan calls after you. You and Anakin turn and salute him.

'And with you!' you say at the same time and head inside. Kenobi sighs.

'Please, be careful,' he asks.

'I'll keep an eye on them, sir,' Rex promises.

'Thank you,' Obi-Wan says. Ahsoka smiles at him and boards the ship with others. She can't wait to see you and Anakin in action together.

When Obi-Wan returns from his mission, you and Anakin are still away. The task is going well, but he hears there are some complications. Still, you return not long after him. The Clones from your legions are the first to get out of the Resolute. They all look weary.

'How did it go?' Kenobi, who is there to greet you, asks. The Clones look at him. Rex walks forward and brings his hands together.

'Please, sir, please, never put the two of them on a mission together again,' he begs. Obi-Wan raises his eyebrows.

'That bad?' he asks.

'They were crazy,' Jesse, a Clone from 501 says with wide eyes.

'That bad?' Obi-Wan sighs.

'It was quite fun, actually,' Ahsoka says, joining them with a small smile, also looking tired. 'But… they are something else together.'

'They're chaos, that's what they are,' Jesse mumbles. Just then you and Anakin show up. You're having a bacta patch on your forehead.

'And what happened to you?' Kenobi asks.

'Skywalker,' you answer, but don't sound angry.

'Yeah, well, it worked, so I'm not sorry,' Anakin says. You roll your eyes.

'But we're not doing it again,' you say.

'How about next time you can throw me into a swarm of droids?' Skywalker suggests. Your eyes light up. Obi-Wan's go wide.

'You did what?!' he demands from his former padawan.

'She had two lightsabers!' Anakin defends himself. You grin and decide to quickly evacuate yourself, not wanting to be berated by Kenobi as well. Ahsoka and Clones take that as their cue as well.

While you retreat, Skywalker glares at you, feeling betrayed. You wink at him and walk away gracefully. Until you hit a droid and trip over him. You can hear Anakin's laughter very clearly.

'Damn you, Skywalker,' you murmur and stand up. You stick out your tongue to Anakin and walk away.

'How can one change their personality so quickly?' Jesse asks Rex. 'On the battlefield they both have been professional, focused and very scary. And now they are…'

'Young people having fun,' Rex finishes with a small, sad smile. They observe you walking away in silence, pondering about the cruelty of the war.

A few days later the Clones from 501st and 98th legions get bad news. The Senate and Jedi Council were so impressed and satisfied with how the mission went, they want to pair you, Anakin and your legions for more missions. All Clones groan in unison at the news. Some actually cry.

However, with time it changes. Yes, you and Anakin can still be crazy, not only on the battlefield. But 501st notices that you tend to have a calming influence on Skywalker. And 98th notice that you seem to thaw around Anakin. They're used to see you calm, collected and serious. Sometimes even a bit too much.

501st Legion takes a quick liking to you, not only because you calm down their general's temper. You are fun, compassionate, kind and you are a very warm person. Sometimes, Anakin even thinks they like you more than him. He is probably very right.

98th Legion is fast to warm up to Skywalker, too. They admire his skills, intelligence and strategies. They also love his fun side and to joke around with him. And annoy you with it.

Both Legions have a chance to see more than anyone, maybe with an exception of Ahsoka, the chemistry between you and Anakin. While others see it as some sort of connection, good sync in the Force, they see it's something… more. And they're determined to see what exactly it is. The opportunity for that comes with one of the missions.

The Clones stand awkwardly outside the medic bay. They look at each other. No one dares to speak. They wince, hearing something clattering inside.

'So… they expect a report,' Sketcher, one of the Clones from 98th, says.

'Do you want to go in and tell them that?' Bunker, his companion, asks. Sketcher gives him a horrified look.

'None of us does,' Jesse murmurs. Just then Ahsoka, who had to take a shower because she was completely covered in slime, shows up. Everyone looks at her with hope.

'Commander, the Jedi Council expects a report,' Rex quickly says. Tano raises her eyebrows.

'Shouldn't Master Skywalker and Master [L/N] do it?' she asks. All Clones look at the door to the med bay. As on cue, Anakin's and then your voices can be heard:

You could have died!

But I didn't!

'I see your point,' Ahsoka sighs. 'I'll get right to it.'

She turns to go and contact the Council. The Clones hurry after her, no longer feeling guilty for not stepping in. Only Rex and Sketcher stay behind, ready to assist you and help if necessary.

Inside the med bay, you and Anakin are glaring at each other. You're covered in bacta patches. But you don't see why your friend is making such a fuss. You're fine. Nothing serious has happened to you.

'But you could have,' Skywalker says. You roll your eyes.

'What's your deal?' you ask, putting a hand on your hip. 'Usually, you don't hesitate to do things like that. You do even more dangerous stunts.'

'You're supposed to be more responsible one,' Anakin argues. 'Besides… you're not me.'

'I know, but what's that supposed to mean?' you ask, narrowing your eyes. Skywalker clenches and unclenches his fist.

'It's less risky when I don things like that,' he says after a tense moment. 'Dangerous things.'

'And why is that?' you ask, crossing your arms over your chest.

'Because I'm a better Jedi,' he blurts out. 'I've always progressed faster than you.'

He regrets his words the moment they leave his mouth. You look as if he's slapped you. For a long moment you stare at each other. Finally, you huff.

'You can be a really unsensitive jerk, Skywalker,' you snap and march out of the med bay.

'[Y/N], wait, I didn't-!' Anakin starts, panicked. But you push past Rex and Sketcher, and hurry away. The Clones stare after you, then look at Skywalker judgingly.

'What?' he asks. Rex sighs and Sketcher shakes his head.

'What?' Skywalker repeats, annoyed, crossing his arms. 'Come on, spit it out.'

The Clones exchange a look. Sketcher waves his hand and walks away. Anakin and Rex stare at each other. Skywalker raises his eyebrow, waiting. The Clone sighs again.

'You should have just told her you were worried, sir,' he says and the Jedi quickly opens his mouth to protest. 'You and me know she's just as good as you. You're angry with her, because you were scared. You know that, I know that, but she doesn't. So, give her time to cool down and talk about it. But calmly now. And explain your reasoning. And apologize.'

'Are you giving me orders, Rex?' Anakin asks, a bit amused.

'Just a suggestion, sir,' the Clone answers, salutes and walks away. Skywalker sighs and runs a hand through his face. He knows Rex is right. But how to talk to you?

Nevertheless, he gathers his courage, and once you're getting close to Coruscant, he searches for you. He finds you in one of the storages, checking for supplies. The furrow of your eyebrows tells him you're still angry. But he has to clear the air now, before it's too late.

'[Y/N],' he says, walking inside. 'Can we talk?'

'Talk or yell at each other?' you ask after a beat.

'Talk,' Anakin answers, walking slowly to you, and scratches the back of his neck. 'I… I owe you an apology.'

You finally look at him, raising your eyebrows at him. You clearly haven't expected that.

'I am not a better Jedi than you,' he says. 'And I have no right to tell you what you should or shouldn't do. I'm… I'm sorry.'

'I'm sorry, too,' you say after a pause, looking at him with sorrow. 'I… I shouldn't have stormed off like that. You… I… Truth is, I've always been a bit jealous of you being promoted quicker than me. Because I was in the Temple longer than you. Ever since I was a baby. I've tried to get over it, but I guess a part of me is still angry about it. But the truth is, the time spend on the training doesn't matter, but talent does. And you're a natural, Anakin. I just… I just wish you'd trust my skills as well. I may be not as good as you are, but I'm capable of doing risky things, as well.'

'I do trust your skills!' he hastily says, taking a step toward you. 'And you are as talented as I am. I just… I… You…'

'Yes?' you ask when he trails off. He gulps and looks into your eyes. His pulse speeds up. He can do it. He can.

'I was worried about you,' he confesses softly, surprising you. 'When I saw you jumping into that fire… for a moment my heart stopped. I thought… that you're not gonna come out of it. I feared I had lost you. When you emerged, I… I was so relieved. But then I became angry. For you to putting yourself in such risk and for making me so scared. I… lashed out at you and I'm sorry for it. But the thought of losing you is…'

You eye him warily, your heart beating fast. He looks at you like a kicked puppy. There's deep sadness in his eyes and… and something else you don't dare to name. Probably, if you reached out, you could read him. But you don't. And you beg him in your mind not to speak.

'It was unbearable,' he finishes softly anyway. You gulp. His eyes are begging you to say something. Your heart screams at you to answer him. But you can't.

'Well… I'm still here,' you say and smile nervously. 'Still in one piece. But I promise to be more careful. And as responsible as usual at least.'

You stare at him, expecting him to smile back. To finally get rid of this tension between you two. So everything could be back to normal. But he doesn't. He stares back at you, his eyes serious and… Oh, no. Determined.

'What if I do lose you one day?' he asks. You quickly put your guard up.

'You'll move on,' you answer, softly but sternly. He scoffs and looks at you with disbelief.

'Do you really think I can do that?' he asks. 'Could you move on if something happened to me?'

'Yes,' you answer with difficulty, forcing the tears back from your eyes.

'Seriously?' Anakin huffs, narrowing his eyes at you. You gulp, feeling a burning sensation in your throat.

'I'm not saying it would be easy,' you say. 'But I'd have to. That is the Jedi way. No attachments. Letting go of those we lost. Moving on.'

You give him a pointed look and walk past him. You press the button to open the door, but suddenly Skywalker grabs your wrist and presses the button again, closing the door. You stare at it, stunned. Your breath hitches when you feel his chest pressing into your back.

'What if we weren't Jedi?' he asks quietly, straight into your ear, causing you to shiver.

'Then… I'd mourn you,' you answer, also quietly. 'Openly. Letting everyone know how… hurt I am.'

'No, that's not the word you wanted to use,' he says, gently squeezing your wrist.

'Heartbroken,' you whisper. 'I'd be heartbroken.'

Anakin lets go of your wrist. But his hand moves to your waist, his other landing on its other side. He starts to turn you around. You panic and press the button to open the door. But it doesn't budge. You frown, confused. You can't wonder about it, however, because your eyes meet Skywalker's.

'Let me go,' you plead, for both your sakes. But he leans toward you, allowing his eyelids to drop a bit. You want to give in. Oh, you want it so much. But…

'What about Padmé?' you ask. He freezes. He looks at you with a frown.

'You've been going on about her ever since I met you,' you huff. 'And then you were reunited and… you always wanted to be on the missions that were connected to her and I always felt… how much she means to you.'

'She's just a friend,' he says, but you give him a skeptical look. 'Truly. Yes, I thought Padmé is… someone more for me. But then I met you and I realized… She was the first beautiful and kind girl I've ever met. What I felt for her was a childhood crush. Nothing more. I'm certain of it. Because what I feel for you is stronger than what I've felt for her.'

'Don't,' you say harshly, attempting to move away. 'Stop it here, Anakin.'

'No,' Skywalker says sternly, looking at you with passion. 'I've been hiding my feelings for too long. I almost lost you today and I can't… I can't continue without you knowing about them. Without knowing about yours…'

He reaches out and cups your cheek. He wipes out a stray tear you weren't even aware of. You open your mouth to protest more, but he quickly leans to you and your lips touch… and it's everything you've ever dreamt of and so much more.

You've been in love with your best friend for years. You've tried to deny and hide it. Because you are both Jedi and you also believed he has some feelings for Senator Padmé Amidala. But now he's kissing you. He's almost devouring your mouth and you just want more. You don't even realize when you put your hand behind his neck and pull him closer to you.

'[Y/N]…' he groans, deepening the kiss.

'Anakin…' you whisper and finally get enough clarity to push him away. 'We… we can't. The Jedi code…'

'Is wrong,' Skywalker says strongly and cups your face, looking at you pleadingly. 'It must be. Because how can this be wrong? Kissing you is the rightest thing I've ever done. I was made to love you, I'm sure of it. How can this be wrong?'

'Attachments lead to fear,' you say, forcing yourself to ignore what he said. 'Fear leads to hatred. Hatred leads to the Dark Side.'

'I'm certain that if I ever was tempted by the Dark Side, you'd beat that idea out of me.'

'Ha. Maybe. What if I turned to the Dark Side with you?'

'You couldn't. You're too strong for it. Too good.'

'I don't know. I've already broken so many rules for you.'

You look at him softly. His breath hitches. For the first time he can see past your walls. He can see the depth of your feelings for him. He opens his mouth to say something, but then voices destroy the moment:

What are you all doing here?

Uh… nothing! Everything is fine!

Yes, perfectly fine, General! No need to worry!

Alright… Where are Anakin and [Y/N]?

Uh…

Um…

… They're in there, aren't they?

No, General, don't!

They need to clear some things out!

The door start opening and Anakin quickly lets you go, stepping away from you. Once it's open, you're met with Obi-Wan, arms crossed and eyebrows raised. Next to him is Ahsoka, looking at you with curiosity. Behind him are the Clones, looking at you sheepishly. You huff.

'Seriously, guys?' you ask, putting hands on your hips.

'We were just trying to make you up,' Sketcher says, grinning. You roll your eyes.

'Did we at least manage that?' Jesse asks hopefully.

'We're good,' you answer and look at Anakin. 'Right?'

Skywalker nods without a word, staring you in the eyes. You turn your gaze to Obi-Wan.

'You didn't have to come and get us,' you say.

'You've been docked here for minutes and no one was getting out,' he explains. 'I was beginning to get worried.'

'Seriously?' you ask, annoyed, glaring at the Clones. They grin at you. You huff and head toward your room. Kenobi shakes his head and follows you. Ahsoka looks at her master. He snaps out of his reverie and walks away, his padawan close behind him.

Not much later he's getting his things, when Rex shows up in his room. He closes the door behind himself. Anakin raises his eyebrows at him.

'What is it?' he asks. Captain straightens up.

'I just wanted you to know, sir, that none of us is going to tell anything about it to anyone,' he says seriously. Skywalker looks at him, confused.

'About what?' he asks.

'Exactly, sir,' Rex says and gives his supervisor a pointed look. 'We also erased all the recordings from the camera in the storage room.'

Anakin's eyes go white and his face goes pale. He opens his mouth to say something, but the Clone interrupts him by saluting.

'Sir,' he says and turns to leave.

'Uh, thank you, Rex,' Skywalker quickly says. Captain turns his head and smiles.

'To be honest, sir, we all have been waiting for that for a long time,' he says and has an audacity to wink, then chuckle at the dumbfounded look on Anakin's face, and walks out.

'Those Clones,' Skywalker huffs after a moment, running a hand through his hair. He quickly gathers his things and leaves.

He finds you in the docks, talking to R2-D2. He hurries to you. You frown at his flushed cheeks.

'What's wrong?' you ask and look at him alarmed. 'Does Obi-Wan know about…?'

'No, and unless one of us says something, he won't,' Anakin denies. 'Rex and others deleted the recordings from the camera in the storage room.'

'The… camera, oh sweet Maker,' you groan, hiding your red face in your hands.

'And they won't tell anyone either,' Skywalker adds and huffs. 'Apparently they ship us.'

You let out a nervous laugh. But you uncover your face. Anakin looks at you softly.

'I meant what I said,' he says. 'I-'

'Don't,' you interrupt him, looking around. 'Not here. Besides, I got the message.'

'What about your feelings?' Skywalker says and grabs your wrist. 'I won't let you go until I hear about them. Please. I need to know.'

You could tell him you don't feel the same. You'd break his heart but maybe it would allow you two to move on. But you know he'd recognize you're lying. Especially since you kissed him back…

'It has always been you, Anakin,' you decide to say softly and look him in the eyes. 'My heart has always belonged to you.'

'Can we… give us a chance, then?' he asks hopefully, moving his hand so he could hold yours.

'I'd like nothing more,' you admit, your heart literally hurting. 'But you know we can't.'

'If I ever try to turn to the Dark Side, you have my permission to beat me out of it,' he quickly says. You snort.

'What if you already turn to it?' you question.

'I know you'll never let that happen,' he answers, grinning. You scoff and roll your eyes. Anakin takes your other hand in his and looks at you pleadingly. In the corner of your eye, you see your Legions discreetly observing you with bated breaths.

'If the Council finds out, I'm the one taking the blame,' you say after a long moment. 'You're already a controversial figure in their eyes. While I am their favorite.'

'Works for me,' Skywalker says, starting to smile.

'And you also have to let me take risks sometimes,' you insist. 'Trust in my abilities.'

'I will,' Anakin promises hastily nodding. You sigh.

'I can't believe I'm agreeing to this,' you murmur. Skywalker smirks and squeezes your hands.

'I'm that good of a kisser, huh?' he teases.

'Oh, you are,' you confirm, loosing yourself in the memory of his lips on yours… You quickly shake yourself out of it and pull your hands away.

'We will have to be careful,' you say. 'I'd like to remain a Jedi at least until the war is over. And you're needed, oh the Chosen One.'

'We will,' Anakin assures you softly, leaning toward you. 'But can I kiss you again?'

'Someone can see,' you protest.

'There are only Clones and R2, they're not going to tell,' Skywalker says. 'I saw Ahsoka walking away somewhere with Obi-Wan. Please. So I would know you're serious and this is not a dream.'

'Fine, but only one,' you give in after a moment. Anakin quickly cups your face, before you change your mind, and joins your lips for a short, but passionate kiss. He leaves you breathless when he pulls away.

'Damn you, Skywalker, you'll be the death of me,' you say weakly. Anakin chuckles and lets you go.

'I'll come to your room later and take you out on a date,' he says, winks and walks away. You blink and turn after him.

'You'll what?!' you call, but he doesn't stop. 'What have I done?'

You sigh, troubled. You know this is wrong. You should resist the temptation. But you can no longer deny yourself what you've wanted for years. Anakin Skywalker.

A/N: Thank you for reading! Let me know your thoughts! Reblog, like and comment if you could. Every comment makes my day!

This can also be found on Archive of Our Own: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53898226/chapters/136425739

#anakin skywalker #reader #anakin x reader #anakin x you #anakin & reader #anakin & you #anakin/reader #anakin/you #star wars #the clone wars

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kasagia · 8 months

Text

Second Waltz

Pairing: Aleksander Morozova/General Kirigan/The Darkling x fem! inferni! reader Summary: For the Winter Fete, you were supposed to waltz with your friend the tidemaker and at the same time use your Grishas' power to entertain the king, queen and all the other self-righteous nobles. In your wildest dreams, you wouldn't have thought you'd end up dancing with General Kirigan... Nonsense from me: So I saw the post of @angellovelyasfck and got inspired... Warning(s): Darkling is a simp for reader; nobody knows why; he is so in love; matching kefta; author have no idea about dancing, but try to write about it; the reader is afraid of him but drawn to him, like a moth to the fire; Aleksander is a mastermind; Words count: 3,2k Taglist: @aoi-targaryen @morrigan-crowmwell ~•♤♤♤•~ Aleksander Morozova's Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~

You looked like a real lady.

If Grishas could be ladies-in-waiting, be respected in Ravka, and have a position of nobility, then women would probably wear such dresses.

You didn't like parties organised by the royal family… well… except for the possibility of eating sweets prepared by royal chefs. It was the only thing that made up for the fact that you and the other Grishas were entertaining the king and his people.

Your powers were displayed as an attraction, a means of entertainment, and while some of you enjoyed the attention they were receiving at the time, others equally abhorred the idea of entertaining Otkazat'sya.

The winter fete was supposed to be like any other for you. You'll put on your festive kefta, sip a sneak peek of champagne, and munch on sweets with your friends.

But it wasn't supposed to be. Because someone figured out that the inferni and the tidemaker will waltz this year using their powers at the same time. Something about a poetic combination of opposites that unite in dance.

Because of this, you stood in the Grand Palace ballroom, looking anxiously around the room as you straightened your dress.

"Nervous?" a soft voice came from behind you. You turned around, sighing in relief, when you saw Genya.

"A little." you admit, calming down as she runs her hand through your hair and smooths the strands of your hair that have managed to come out of the updo she made for you. "I'm a soldier, not a dancer or lady."

Genya giggles. "In this dress, many would disagree with you. You look beautiful even without my touch-ups."

You are blushing. She made sure that you looked… just not like you tonight.

Genya has outdone herself. The dress was blue, sleeveless and strapless, and it went all the way down to the floor. In combination with a blue coat imitating an inferni kefta and a golden belt engraved with the symbol of the Second Army, you looked phenomenal.

Like a Grishas' princess...

"You're only saying this, because you are the one who made that dress."

"Well, it's very obvious." she teases you and taps you lightly on the shoulder. You both giggle, amused.

Suddenly, a ball of fire flashes between you. It misses your head by only a few inches. You wrinkle your nose and send the inferni who shot you a fireball an angry glare. Nobody does anything about it, the fire show continues as if nothing happened.

"What was that?" Genya asks, seeing your exchange of glances with the woman.

"Inferni affairs. Warkov is sent to go through the fold again. She resents that I haven't been there yet, and she's already gone four times. It's not my fault that the general has an aversion to me for some reason, and instead of using my powers in a good way, I have to do… this." you say in disgust, pointing at the dress. You clench your fists at your sides. "I can do more, Genya. I could help our people in fighting or in a battle… but instead, I'm stuck in this damn palace making playthings for the nobility." you add more quietly, making sure only she can hear you.

Genya sighs, looking at you. She strokes your cheek with her thumb, where you have a bit of icing from the cookie you ate earlier.

"I know what you mean. Trust me." you give her a sad look and squeeze her hand. She gives you a small smile. " But believe me… the general has his reasons for keeping you here." before you can say anything to respond or even ask what she means, you see her waving her hand, calling someone. David joins you, smiling at you two. You watch with interest as he steals glances at Genya. "Speaking of the general… there's been a slight change of plans."

"What? What do you mean?" you ask, confused, as you look from one to the other. You tense up at the mere mention of the general.

Suddenly the blue of your dress gives way to a deep, terrifying black. Only General Kirigan could wear this colour, as the only Shadow summoner, Darkling, descended from the Black Heretic. Panicked, you shift your gaze between Genya and David, hoping that this sudden change of colour won't bring you anyone's attention.

"Nya, Dav… it's black. Why did you turn it into black?" you become more and more uneasy when people around you notice the colour you wear.

It's official. General Kirigan will throw you to the volcras for such a disrespectful act.

"Your tidemaker friend was sent on... an important mission." David explains the sudden change of plans.

"What? But we were supposed to dance..." you say, surprised, but Genya cuts you off before you start panicking more about the absence of your friend, with whom you've been practicing this damn waltz and fire and water choreography for months.

"You will dance with the general."

After the red-haired girl utters this sentence, there is a long silence on your part, interrupted by the sounds of other inferni summoning fire. You freeze, completely shocked, refusing to believe that Genya meant what she said. It will be a pure disaster.

"No." you say, shaking your head.

Waltzing with a black general who, for some reason, doesn't recognise your presence in his army wasn't on your to-do list. Not today or ever. You feared this man more than anyone. And whatever you did to him to make him disapprove of your existence and the amount of power that lies dormant within you, you didn't want to be near him to test him even more and risk making him angry.

"Y/N." a woman snaps you out of your thoughts.

"Genya, please no. He hates me. I don't know why, but because of him, I can't do anything useful with my power. I'll step on his toes, and he'll hate me even more. He would kick me out of the Little Palace, and our evenings in the palace kitchen and secret chocolate snacking would be over."

"You eat chocolate without me?" asks a surprised and hurt David, oblivious to the growing panic and desperation inside of you. You can't dance with the general. This will end terribly.

"I'm going with you to stargaze outside the palace grounds. There's one one, David. Which doesn't change the fact that my death is imminent and none of you want to help me."

"For the love of the saints, Y/N, general won't kill you. It is just a dance. Put a smile on your face and try your best, I know you can do it and control yourself."

"What if I set him on fire? Saints, they will hang me for killing the only living Darkling."

"You were right; she is worse than me." David whispers, not quite subtly, to Genya while you're still panicking. You stop and look at him indignantly before answering in complete seriousness.

"I've heard that."

"Good. Now don't panic, the general is coming here." Genya takes David's arm and they run away from you, both discussing something lively.

However, before your brain processes the information and reacts defensively, by running away from where you are standing (preferably to the palace kitchen), you feel his presence behind you.

"Miss Y/L/N." you shiver when you hear his deep voice behind you.

"General." you reply in an unemotional military tone and turn to him after you swallow and calm down a bit.

"I see you already know about... a little change of plans." he says, nodding at your outfit. Only now are you painfully aware that you are facing the Black General, wearing his colors. May the saints receive your poor soul. "Genya and David did wonderful work." he adds. You have a bit of trouble swallowing and keeping your voice steady, but you finally manage to reassure yourself for a moment that you can at least pretend to be cool to the general.

"I... thank you, general... that's all their work." you say, trying to justify your appearance—wearing his colours when he's the only one who can wear them. However... he doesn't seem angry or crazy... and if you were dumber, you'd think he appreciates how good you look in black.

His dark eyes watch you carefully from top to bottom. You feel strange under his watchful gaze, unable to read any emotion from his face. He lingers a little longer on your body before meeting your eyes again.

"Shall we?" he asks, offering you his arm like a true gentleman. You dare not refuse him, so you nod your head and try to control the trembling of your hands as you slip your hand into the crook of his elbow. He leads you both further into the centre of the ballroom. You may notice that the infernis' show is about to end. "You will do everything as in rehearsals. I'll adjust my shadows to your fire to make it look as coherent as possible."

"Yes, general." you nod to him, having no idea how he wants to combine your fire and his shadows. But you have other problems on your mind now.

Like the hateful glare from Warkov. She's brave enough to 'accidentally' send another small fireball your way. Only your quick reflexes keep you from getting burned. The general looks at you, intrigued. But you pay no attention to him, too busy fighting to look at the inferni who hates you. The Darkling notices this and looks at the woman carefully. And if you looked at him, you'd see him nod to Ivan in Warkov's direction with a clear sign of investigating the matter between the two of you.

Inferni show ends. Your heart is beating like crazy with stress, knowing that now you will have to dance with the general. The darkling gives you a half-smile at your nervousness and grabs your hand as you both head to the center. He stands in front of you and, without letting go of your hand, says:

"We can find a light in the darkness… but not only from the sun or moon. But from something that we have around us that is as dangerous and unpredictable as it is beautiful and mesmerizing. Light isn't the only thing that dispels darkness. It is also the fire."

And with this, he joined hands, plunging the ballroom into complete darkness. The orchestra begins to play the melody you know, to which you have spent bloody hours learning the steps and memorising the moments when you are supposed to summon fire.

Only this time, it's not just going through the steps. No. This time, you feel something. Strange electricity as the general puts his hand on your waist and grabs your hand, pulling you closer than necessary. You begin to move around the room.

You light up the two of you with your fire, making you the only people visible in the dark room. And for some strange reason, you can't take your eyes off the general's dark irises, which stare at you as if they want to pierce your soul. His eyes glow from the flames of fire you let out, making it even harder to look away from him.

At one point, he takes away his shadows. The two of you are in full view, as is the crowd around you, but all you can look at is each other. His shadows travel with your fire, enhancing its brilliance.

You don't even notice when you start making your own modifications to the fire choreography, letting the balls and flames dance around the tiny shadows the general casts. You feel like all you can think about is a man holding you in his arms and watching you intently as if you were the only person in the whole world.

At one point, you are so overwhelmed by his gaze that you look away from him to the fire that is circling around you. You pull away from him slightly, so you don't rub against each other with every stop. You wonder why the general trusts you with enough power to dance with you so close to the fire but won't let you leave the walls of the Little Palace.

His hand on your waist pushes you gently back towards him, snapping you out of your thoughts. You turn your surprised look towards him.

"I don't bite, little flame… not unasked." he takes the opportunity to whisper in your ear. It takes your breath away for a moment. You wonder what the hell happened to him.

For the first time, you enjoy the hot fire around you… at least it's a way to explain to people why you blush lightly in his arms.

He spins you around, and as you land in his arms again, you notice that the colour of his kefta has changed with the heat of your fire. The black threads that decorate his kefta turn red. Your jaw would drop if you were alone.

You feel his hands on you more and more, despite how much material you have on you. The intensity of his gaze warms you more than the flames that dance with you around the two of you.

You don't know why his presence affects you so much. You don't know where the fear you felt before has gone. All you can do is let him guide you as he holds you securely in his arms and draws you close to him. Looking into his dark eyes makes all thoughts in your head disappear. It's just you and him.

And only the saints know how you manage to keep summoning fire without burning the two of you.

To your relief, the waltz comes to an end. However, instead of letting go of your waist and grabbing your hand to turn you around, Kirgan lets go of your hand. He lifts you with one arm around your waist and spins you around, keeping you close to him.

You melt in his arms. If you didn't know what it was about the attention he gave you before, you were completely lost now, feeling his strong muscles all around you. Your heart was beating like wildfire, and your cheeks were even hotter.

And a careful observer would have noticed how your fire got fed off by the general's sudden movement. And Kirigan was a very careful observer. So he gave you a quick, cheeky, smug smirk.

Your behaviour did not escape Genya and Fedyor. They looked at each other knowingly and whispered something conspiratorially to each other before Ivan hushed them.

Kirigan has put you safely on the ground. Flames and shadows disappeared around you. People started clapping. You were about to run from the middle of the room when a strong grip on your hand stopped you. The general leaned over and kissed your hand, not taking his eyes from you for even a moment.

You hold your breath and blush even more. His beard gently tickles your hand. The general's lips gently caress your skin, and you can't help but imagine how they would feel somewhere else...

The general reluctantly releases your hand and strokes it with his thumb. "I'm looking forward to the next dance, little flame." he whispers, so only you can hear him.

He releases your hand and walks away from you. You suddenly miss his closeness and the intoxicating scent of his perfume… but you're not distracted enough to sneak out of the ballroom at the first chance you get.

Your hand burns pleasantly where his mouth was a moment ago. And for the first time since you arrived at the Little Palace, you're looking forward to the next winter fete.

You went to the balcony to get some rest. The cool night air hits your skin. You lean against the railing and stare at the ground in front of you. You have a perfect view of the Little Palace from here.

You close your eyes and enjoy the night air. Suddenly, you feel a presence behind you. And loud footsteps make you realize that the general is specifically alerting you to his presence. You know if he wanted to, he'd sneak up on you silently.

You turn around and lean against the railing. "General." your soft whisper echoes across the balcony so clearly that the loud music doesn't prevent him from hearing you.

"Captain Y/L/N." he replies, taking a step towards you. He is standing next to you, looking at the terrain in front of you. "You are a good dancer." he praises you without looking at you.

"Thank you, General, but you were the one who mainly led our dance."

"Then let me appreciate that you never stepped on my toes. Believe me, it's a great feat; I've danced too many times not to know it." you can't help but giggle at his words. Out of the corner of your eye, you see him staring at you. He turns to you and tucks a strand of your hair behind your ear. "The way you manipulate fire... how you guide it, create shapes, and intensify the flame at will... few can do what you do. Rarely do I see such self-awareness and composure in an Inferni."

"However, I am not fit enough to use my powers anywhere other than within the walls of the Palace." you say before you can think it over. You're biting your tongue too late. Now all you can do is watch him, hoping he won't punish you for making such a bold accusation against him.

"You must forgive me, little flame… it's all my selfishness." he says tenderly, completely confusing you.

"What?"

"Let me show you." he says, and before you can ask anything else, he leans in and kisses you.

His hand on your cheek and lips, which caresses yours so tenderly, warms you better than any fire you could summon. You lean into his touch and feel yourself melting with every tactical, combined movement of his mouth and hand. You could control the flames… but he could do much more than just control the shadows. He played you perfectly.

At the moment, you were enjoying it more than you were worried.

Much to your displeasure, he moved away from you. He stroked your cheek with his thumb and whispered. "I can't wait to dance with you again." he licked his lips, looking at your own. His gaze came back to your eyes. "You look lovely in black, by the way." he adds, before wishing you good night and walking away like nothing happened.

Of course, before he left the balcony door, he gave you one last mischievous look. And standing there, warm from his kiss alone, with red cheeks and tingling lips, you knew he did it on purpose... that he made you want more.

The next day, you are forced to wear your blue kefta again. You would never think that wearing his colours would be so pleasant. Neither that the inferni who hated you and rebelled other people against you will be permanently moved to Kribirsk... or that you'll wake up in a room filled with your favourite flowers and an invitation to dinner with the general.

Maybe the waltzes weren't so bad after all.

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