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thekinkyleopard · 8 months

Text

The Gathering

A group Non-Canon Fic (LONG!)

Ft: Alistar, Remi, Biziil, Rexar, Kriia and Meeko

⚠️Content Warning⚠️

Contagion, Uh…germ rolling?, Teasing, Fluff

Description: The Anti-Christ has been up to his usual antics, but now he’s craving something new. He wants excitement. He goes looking for it, and it coincidentally enough, seems to work out…or does it?

Snz Color Key:

Alistar

Remi

Rexar

Kriia

Biz

Meeko

Author’s Notes: Hey Guys! A little bird has told me they want some Al sneeze and I’ve decided to make it happen! Also bare with me on the cover art, Geez is busy and I’m impatient so I just snipped the teaser for now 😅 I don’t wanna talk about it 🥲 😂 anyway! Enjoy!

Alistar has gotten bored of soul collecting, and life ruining. He needs something new. He’s been on earth for a few years now, and he’s expanded his horizons a few ways, by making friends. Kind of. If you could call half of them that. Who’s he kidding, they all secretly love him. However, he was feeling, melancholy, bored, missing something. He had watched so many of his mates come down with colds and messy sneezing afflictions. He wanted that. What did it feel like? To be out of control of your bodily functions? He only felt like he had met that feeling in sex, when he reaches orgasm and that electric shock tingles through every cell in your body. He had to imagine it was something like that, but for some reason it brought those afflicted, suffering. It seemed less than suffering to him.

Step one; Find someone sick. Which wasn’t hard to do in a friend group where many are cursed with poor health and immunities. Al sent everyone a text.

“Hey Hru” and though some went unanswered, he did get one back from the little mutt.

“Bringing some cold medicine by Lee’s, Remi is sick again, why?” the demon snickered. No wonder he didn’t hear from either the cat or wolf. Typical, the man was a walking virus. He knew that would be his best bet. However, getting into their space while Remi is unwell…might be a tad more difficult to achieve than he originally planned. It’s fine. The wolf wouldn’t be able to strangle him into a one way ticket to hell, being less than 100% condition. He’ll risk it. Without texting Draeko back, the mutt feeling a bit annoyed that the demon bothered him for no reason. Al got his keys and made his way to the Conderson House.

Parking in the driveway, he had stopped at the store with all kinds of different goodies he could use to charm the two, less than friendly, acquaintances of his. He got out of his car with the bag of care items in one clutched fist, he approached the front door, knocking for once. Maybe it would make them feel a bit less apprehensive sending him away. Shortly, the door opened and there standing was the freckled face cat.

“Alistar?” He asked confused, raising an eyebrow as he looked the demon up and down, taking note of the bag in his hands. “What are you doing here?” It was never usually good when the red head showed up, so Levi was more or less on guard.

“Heard the wolf is sick, thought I’d bring some stuff and help out,” shrugging his shoulders. Levi narrowed his eyes. This was unlike the other. He didn’t care. He didn’t help. He didn’t nurse. What was his angle?

“What do you want?” The cat asked now with great apprehension.

“What??? Why do I have to want something to help out my dear sick friend, Remi? You offend me so,” smiling to sell the image he was clearly trying to provide. Levi wasn’t buying it even more than he had been previously.

“Al, please, he is not in the mood to deal with any of your clown behavior, you can leave the stuff and go back home,” the leopard went to reach for the bag of items the demon brought, however, it only left access for the redhead to slip inside.

“I won’t be long, don’t worry,” snickering in an almost unnoticeably menacing way. Truthfully, Levi was just too busy closing the door and trying to brace himself for the irritation that was soon to be fogging up the entire house. Al stepped into the bedroom where Remi was splayed across the bed in only a pair of boxers. Sniffling and loosely wiping his arm across his reddened and chapped nostrils. “Nnnn…” the wolf groaned as he rubbed his nose in hard circles soft clicks echoing off his face.

“Hey buddy, you look like shit!” The demon chuckled as he dumped the contents of the bag onto the floor at the wolf’s bedside. Speaking of, his pale green eyes shot open and immediately looked to the intruder.

“What the actual fuck are you doing here?” He growled low in his sore throat trying to avoid coughing through the angry response. Alistar stood back, giving a performance of offense as he touched his chest with his open palm.

“Is that ANY WAY to treat your friend?? I brought you supplies! Snacks! Drugs! Well…the boring one… I brought you edibles!” He now gestured to all the things he had just previously dumped onto the floor.

“Great, now leave,” followed with a rough, hoarse cough that ripped through the man’s already pained throat. It felt like daggers going in and out his esophagus every time. He groaned lowly, his face twisting, nose clenching and scrunching as he was trying to stifle in the prickling tickles that threatened to over power the conversation with each flex of his jaw.

Al stood a bit closer immediately trying to waft the sprayed contagion that entered the air as the larger black haired man had expelled his coughs into open air.

“Stop that, freak,” Remi glared harder at the strange demon as he wiped his mouth. Alistar more or less ignored the statement as he collected the balled up tissues sprawled about the space within the bedroom. “What the fuck are you -hd’ISCHhh, hh'IETSH’UE!…!?” The wolf tried defensively sitting up, but exploded into a loud powerful series of sneezes that caused his whole body to tremble, his hands trembling, bringing them to his face in a panic. Trying to cover himself, hating that the demon was here to see him like this.

“I’m just cleaning! Uncle fuckin’ Christ, man, worry about that illness of yours,” the red head shook his head slowly, almost with joking solemness followed by a humored chuckle. Remi sighed deeply throwing his head back against the headboard to fight between his deteriorating health and the obnoxiously strange demon collecting his trash.

“Leeeeeave!” He groaned snatching up Levi’s pillow and hucking it over violently at the quick moving demon. Who eventually threw his hands up in defense.

“Can you do that again though? One more time?” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively before another pillow was thrown directly into his face with a PFFD! It then fell to the floor with an almost silent thud. “Okay! Okay! I’m leaving! Shit!” Mumbling as he snatched up his now refilled bag of used goods and shuffled with haste out through the bedroom door. Levi stood in the living room, looking at Alistar with an apprehensive gaze. “Someone is a sore anal cavity today,” the red head chuckled as he shot a wink toward the cat. Whom in turn rolled his bright ceruleans.

“You want me to take that bag of yuck?” Already starting to reach forward in Al’s direction, but was quickly met with retaliation, the demon recoiled from Levi’s grasp.

“No! Uh…I got it…s’fine!” Chuckling nervously, he scratched the back of his neck before awkwardly shuffling his way now to the front door. “Thanks for letting me stop by!” Waving frantically before he disappeared altogether and began racing his way to his car.

Levi, inside, walked toward the bedroom and looked out the large window that overlooked their property. Remi sat up now as well. “Why did he take all that trash…?” The wolf asked with confusion as he sniffled loudly, rubbing his nose with a new piece of the throw away cloth.

“No idea…” the leopard muttered back but continued to watch through the window, while Al scrambled into his car, and proceeded to dump the bag’s contents over his head. Grabbing handfuls of the used trash and rubbing it across his face. Levi looked over at Remi, who too was watching and they equally shared a silent, but confused gaze.

Alistar on the other hand was now stuffing tissues in his nose, huffing them through his open mouth, and just overall being a gross menace. Once he felt that he was satisfyingly submerged in germs and ick, he started up his car and headed home, leaving the two stunned silent and with millions of unanswered questions.

The Next Day

Alistar woke up with a pounding headache, his body hot, sticky, like he’d been sitting in a sauna. He sat up and pressed his palm to his forehead. “Dear Grandpa God….what the actual fuck…” groaning lowly in his newly sore throat. This was an experience he had never felt in his entire existence. His entire body was stiff, almost entirely impossible to move. Managing to muster any strength within his aching bones, Al came to a stand and slowly stumbled his way into the bathroom, flicking the light on and met face to face with a gruesome reflection. “Oh, Unholy shit… I look worse than I feel,” he mustered up a sore chuckle before it followed with a hacking cough. “Ack!” He cleared his throat, trying to fight over the uncontrollable urges building within his now awakened body.

Though most would find this current state of being completely de habilitating and check out for the next few days, Al was fueled by the aching that throbbed behind the cells of his vessel. Suddenly, an entirely new, foreign feeling started to prickle at the inside of his nostrils, trailing down his throat. He swallowed once, and twitched his pierced nose back and forth. Nothing would soothe and he found himself squinting under the harshness of the bathroom lighting. “H’h…” he stuttered, his breath catching in his throat as he begged to swallow it. “W-Wha-HEhH’eEZSCHhh’iiEW!!”

It came exploding out of the anti-Christ at lightening speed, he hadn’t time to cover as a mess of saliva came splashing across the bathroom mirror. He sniffled loudly and hung over the sink weakly, each hand on both sides of the counter to hold him up. “Fuck…” he gasped with a raspy voice, his eyes leaking and nose starting to drip. “Oh shit…” he stumbled around and grabbed a towelette hanging from the little golden ring on the wall. He slid his nose over it and tried to relieve himself of some of the wetness that polluted him as he grinned with bright satisfaction. “So that’s what that’s like…” he bit his lower lip…interesting. There has to be someone he could play with in this condition.

It took most of whatever strength he had left in him to move himself out the bathroom and through the halls. He searched Drae’s room, nothing. Kanai’s room? Also nothing. Living room, kitchen… “Seriously? None of my toys are home?” He clicked his tongue with irritation as he scanned the small home. “Fine, I’ll just find some,” he grabbed his keys and he was on his way to find some trouble with his new found virus. Who knows what could happen.

On the other side of town, Alistar found himself quite at a loss. It seemed no one wanted to come near him as he sniveled and sniffed. It seemed that majority of citizens look at him as if he said something offensive, and walk very quickly away. He didn’t understand why no one else wanted to join him with such glorious displeasure of bodily suffering. He snorted a glob of snot from the base of his sinuses down his throat to avoid hacking it out. When a flash of familiar white and red hair caught his attention at a near by cafe he happened upon. He looked over, there they were. His friends. Rexar, Biziil, Meeko, Kriia and Remi all at one table. Where were the others? He wondered silently to himself.

“I’m tellin’ you bro, dude, male hummingbirds are like MAD horny cause they got hella testosterone, I read it online,” Rex went on and on about the most random of facts that he had recently absorbed, while on another 14 hour acid trip, doom scrolling online.

“Nature is so beautiful,” Biz shook his head with a softened smile still finding the appreciation for the world and how it moves to grow and evolve. Meeko, however, looked over at her boyfriend and giggled almost unable to hold the childish expression written on her face.

“It’s something that’s for sure…” the ginger haired girl swung her feet, more or less keeping the inappropriate jokes to herself as she was seated on top of the table itself. Remi rolled his eyes and crossed his arms.

“Nature is weird as fuck, and now I will never unknow that dude hummingbirds are just Perma horny,” the wolf also shook his head, but almost solemnly, as if this news really, genuinely, sat uncomfortably with him.

“Honestly, good for them,” Kriia laughed openly, which then gave Meeko the courage to giggle loudly right along side her. The boys shaking their heads with softened smirks at the two immature women.

Slowly, Alistar approached the congregation of friends, blackened hands in his pockets as he came to a halt at the perimeter. “Well Hello there, crew, what ar…huh…HI’H…HEhH’eEZSCHhh’iiEW!!” The demon sneezed outwardly onto the middle of the group, causing them all to recoil quickly and cover their own faces. A fine mist floating amongst them. Al breaking into a fit of coughs now.

“Fucking, ew, dude,” Remi glared hard at the red head scooting his whole chair back at least a foot from the table itself now. “I literally just got better, don’t even look at me with whatever weird, super demon virus you have,” the wolf looked disgusted, his emerald eyes narrowed and glaring daggers down at the sick cretin.

"Whoa, Al are you sick? I didn't think that was possible!" Meeko looked genuinely shocked, almost curious enough to inspect him closely but deciding it would be best to stay away. Al sniffled and slid his hand lazily over his dripping nose.

"It's fibe, I'm fibe...oh...no, my voide id weird now...." the redhead furrowed his brows.

"Yeah, I think you may need to go home and lay down..." Biz said cautiously, also taking a slow up and down look at the male. "You look terrible,"

"Yeah like a pile of dog shit run over, twice," Rex chuckled sparking up a joint with the snap of his index and thumb. "But if you manage to feel better later dude, you should come to my show! I'm spinnin out at the theatre, my family owns the venue so we can get hella rowdy," a cocky, charismatic smirk spread clear across his face, while everyone else's fell. Did he just invite the visibly ill demon to the show? In a small venue? Packed like sardines?

"Dawg...seriously?" Remi looked over at Rex, being the only one brave enough to actually speak up before Al could accept the invitation. Kriia shrugs her shoulders and puts a hand on the wolf's back.

"In his defense, he did say if Al felt better," the redheaded female spoke matter of factly, but still with an air of gentleness to defend her mate’s careless action.

"Yeah exactly, thanks babe," he winked at his girlfriend giving her a soft purse of his lips as if to kiss her from afar before taking another long dramatic drag of his jay. Alistar cleared his throat and stood his ground, shaking his head back and forth regardless how lightheaded that action made him feel, he cleared his throat to gain some composure.

"I'm fine! What time tonight? I'll definitely slide through," shrugging off the loving embrace of his illness to convince the rest of them he was actually completely fine. More than half of them, audibly groaned, Biz slapped his palm over his face.

“8pm sharp, that’s when I go on and rock everyone’s world,” he chuckled releasing a cloud of smoke in the wake of his excitement. He really just wanted to try and get a huge gathering going, he wanted as many people to see him as possible. He believed music could heal. Even if his music was of special taste.

“I wouldn’t miss it,” Al smirked as he pulled up a chair only for Biz to stop him, coming full stand and pressing an open palm to the demon’s chest.

“Go. Take. Meds. Rest. You’re not gonna hang around us and give us your disease, you’ll give it to my little bug here, and she’ll pass it to our love at home, and then I’m stuck nursing their weak immune systems back to health,” the two men furrowed their brows at each other, but Biz easily towered the redhead. Al grumbled and stepped back from the chair only for Kriia to speak up.

“Ah, come on Bizzy, what if he just stays within 6 feet of little Crickers here,” Meeko snapped her gaze to look at Kriia. She hated the nickname her brother gave her, she hated it worse when his friends used it. She folded her arms and huffed but remained relatively silent on the matter. Biz now narrowed his grey brows again at the female who put her hands up defensively. “Just tryna’ be accommodating my bad,” snickering at how serious the bear got.

“Come oooon Biz…” Al pleaded with his watery eyes, dripping nose and chapped lips not selling his argument any further.

“No, go home,” the silver haired man sat back down in his seat, knowing full well the demon wouldn’t challenge him any further.

“You’re a dick….I’ll remember this,” the anti-Christ squinted at the large man, who made eye contact over with Remi.

“Am I a dick, brother?” The polar bear asked his in law from across the table, who could only return the gaze with a hefty chuckle and shrug of his own large shoulders.

“You? A dick? Laughable,” his glowing emeralds moving slowly to gaze at the pouting dragon that could only cross his arms with annoyance and defeat.

“You’re all gonna be sorry,” quickly lifting two fingers up to his own Ruby red orbs, and pointing it back out to the group in front of him. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you,” he tried to smirk, he tried to be his usual catty, elusive and sneaky self but his threats were followed in a violent series of coughs and yet another loud sneeze. “Hh’HeSHH’IEW!!”

“Alright man, well, we’ll see you at the show then,” Rex finally having checked back into the conversation after getting lost in his phone scrolling for a moment. He wasn’t too interested in the mindless squabbles. The rest of them looked at the pyro like he’d just farted amongst them. Yet, Alistar turned on his heels and went to lick is contagiously ill wounds.

Later that Night…

Rex was already behind the theatre, getting ready for his performance while the crowd piled in. Stage management making sure the jockey table was set up right. It was definitely a full house, and he probably could have anticipated it, but he was always shocked regardless. Biz, Meeko, and Kriia were all up front, securing their spot while Remi went to grab them drinks. “Bear, these shoes…are already starting to kill me…” the ginger haired girl complained, the heels she chose to wear out to the event were starting to make her feet throb.

“Do you want to go up on my shoulders, mouse?” He asked already turning to grab her by her waist.

“Hmm,” she looked down at the floor, trying to gauge the level of sanitation, and figured it couldn’t be that bad. “It’s okay, baby, can you just put my shoes in your backpack?” Already starting to unstrap them to hand over. Biz smiled softly and nodded, reaching out to let her hand them to him before he stuck them in his black Jansport.

“Better?” He asked her while she stood there for a bit but as she lifted and stepped her feet a few times, he was met with a look of disgust.

“Mmh..” she sort of muttered uncomfortably trying to hide the fact she was regretting this mistake upon realizing the floor felt….sticky.

“Here, mouse,” Biz bent down and took off his own captain laced boots, now standing in his socks and handing her his shoes. She grinned at him with a brightness that always brought him straight to his knees. A soft dust of pink fell over his cheeks and nose as he looked at her lovingly.

“Thank you, Bear,” hurriedly she slipped them on and tied them tightly so they wouldn’t slide off. Despite their naturally tight fit, the shoes were significantly bigger, however they worked out way better than the previous solutions.

“Absolutely, darling,” he leaned down to kiss her lips with a tenderness, a display that caused the red headed girl next to them to audibly respond.

“You guys are disgustingly adorable,” Meeko blushed brightly and grinned clinging tightly to her large partner’s arm. Biziil could only look down at his girl, enthralled by everything she did.

“Thanks Krii!” The orangette giggled before the lights started to go down, and the crowd began to push in. Remi slowly squeezed in from behind the group, shoving people with his knees as his hands were full of drinks.

“Here,” he grumbled, though it went unheard, the intro music starting to blare through the crowd. The group each took their respective drinks, began to sip on them as they awaited Rex to start his set. Remi slid next to Kriia in the front row, his hands grasping the barricade as the sea of people started to sway around them. The stage lights started to shine and change different colors against the performance area, the stage screen starting to display animated characters flashing to the beat of the music. The jockey table displayed as a matching puzzle piece to the main screen showing. Everyone began to cheer when the screens matched up to Rex’s artist logo. Meeko and Kriia both screaming and jumping with excitement. Biz and Remi remained in a stoic stance as they drank their beverages, stealing a glance at each other in response to the reactions of the women. Smirking at one another.

Unbeknownst to them, figuring he hadn’t healed up, Alistar was late to sliding through the entrance and security. He had a few too many items in his pockets against theatre rules. Grumbling angrily between sniffles and rubbing his nose with aggressive fervor, that his weed, pills, vodka flask and switchblade were all confiscated in order to enter. He almost went home. However, it was fine, he still had some stuff, hidden. Heavily bagged eyes scanned through the crowd, finding Biz, the tallest in the building up front with the rest of the crew. “Targets acquired,” the demon snickered loosely that followed with a loud and obscenely large spray of mess. “HEHH’DZSCHh’iEEW!!” Offending a few close by fans that became casualty to his sick. He could only audibly “SNNDDFF,” with a sly, charismatic grin at those he had wronged within the crowded space. Those of them having seen the shit eating expression, rolled their eyes.

Alistar started to move his way through the crowd which wasn’t hard, anyone who gave him an issue, took one good look at him and immediately wanted nothing to do with him. He looked worse than he had earlier in the day, his skin visibly glistening with sweat, darker grey than it had ever been, one eye completely blackened, the other his sclera black and iris still red. A terrifying face to be confronted with in a dark venue for many reasons.

The demon moved fast through the people and up to the back of the crew going relatively unnoticed as Rex came into set and began to raise his hands up, flames shooting from his fingers. “Let’s, FUCKING, GO!!!!” He shouted before launching into his first song as the music blared wildly, and bodies began to collide and crash together, Al took his opportunity. He hovered behind Biz and Meeko at first, the two were glued together and managing to get pickled right behind the both of them was honestly better than Al could ask for. He focused his darkened eyes and concentrated on the bright lights flickering about that eventually brought back that tickling, and thrilling sensation from moments ago. Oh it was coming, it was going to be a big one, his nose dripping already with anticipation as it hitched up through his sinuses to front and center. “Hih’AESSSHH’UE! SHH’UH! TCH-SHIEWW!” A short series of loud bursts came flying out of his open maw, but between the two sweating and the loud music, it went passed the couple’s ability to hear anything but filthy trap music. His bacterium floating within their spacing, Meeko consuming it within her unknowingly as she gasped to sing what lyrics she knew and the music itself, had. She was bouncing in her place, as Biz tried to cling to her side, his eyes fixated on the moving images on each screen unaware of the illness being spread quickly through both of them.

Despite the sound, and going undetected, both parties did feel the fine mist of saliva that hit their exposed parts of flesh, but thought nothing of it but maybe a spilled drink. Neither turned to notice the demon, nor that he was mouth breathing so openly behind them as the sudden force from the sneezes, lack of oxygen and lights were having an effect on his flesh vessel.

“Shit…” he gasped out loud to himself as he held his head in his palm. He could only grin. “You’re a tough little virus, aren’t you?” He thought to himself internally. Never mind that his vessel felt weakened, he allowed the dizziness only to fuel his desires. While the first half of the set he hovered over the unsuspecting couple, to make sure they were well marinated. Who knows if his plan would even come to be fruitful, as most times they were hit or miss. Yet, he wouldn’t squander the opportunity to at least make an attempt at his dreams. After all, that’s what being on earth was all about, no?

A few times the demon found himself having to duck behind others, trying to avoid being spotted by Remi when he’d leave and return with drink refreshments, which wasn’t terribly hard to do. The wolf wasn’t as entirely clever as Levi in spaces like these and wouldn’t go looking for someone ducked within the space of people in the crowd. His anxiety usually caused him to avoid most things. Something the demon has noted long ago. Once the coast was clear he just had to maintain a low profile, behind the large raven haired man. Shouldn’t be too hard. Kriia was definitely distracted enough, occasionally flashing Rex during his set. Rex couldn’t really see anyone past Kriia who knew just where to stand to be visible under the lights of his set blinding him. He smirked as he continued to perform. Al’s jaw fell open and his eyes watered over, spilling tears down his cheeks. His body prickled in goosebumps while a sharp gasp was the last thing he could control before he sneezed again, “Hih’AESSSHH’ue!!” just to the side of the woman, unnoticeably, another cloud of speckled spit ghosted through the atmosphere. Alistar sniffled, wiping his nose across his arm.

Remi was however, side eyeing the crowd, and had been, three drinks in he started to notice the swift flashes of red but…that’s Kriia? Right? On occasion he heard the slight snuffle of a stuffed nose coming from his right …no? His left? It caused the hairs on the back of his neck to stand up, desperate to lose himself in the music like everyone else. Yet, he couldn’t shake this feeling there was something hovering them.

Alistar, ducking back and forth, completely obtuse to the music just trying to keep himself from falling over and also being seen by the ever so observant man. ‘God, can’t he ever just chill the fuck out? I just want to get him sick, what’s the big deal? Just enjoy your music, stop worrying about what’s behind you, asshole,’ the demon thought internally in between snuffles and throat ripping coughs. He didn’t need to keep his volume down, the speakers were set close to front row. His actions all drowned out as he continued to skip back and forth between them all. He traced a finger down the center of Meeko’s back, and she shuddered, suddenly feeling very cold, almost woozy. She tried shaking it off, the feeling of a light touch caused her to stir, however she could only assume it was Bizzy just being affectionate. She pushed closer into the large man who wound up enveloping her, as the ginger haired woman now stood in front of the large bear man.

“Buzzkill,” Alistar thought as his access to the small woman was blocked. It’s fine, it would all be fine this was only the beginning. The set was coming to a close, Rex announcing he had two songs left. That mean’t the anti-Christ only had a few moments before they’d all meet up back stage in the dressing room. Biz sniffled, not really noticing the sudden feeling inside his nose, and Meeko the same. Kriia was feeling hotter than she normally would at a show, but Remi, he was the only one seemingly fine as he downed a 4th drink.

The demon just couldn’t get a proper in on the wolf, anytime he would get close, the large man just knew something was beside him. How was he going to….oooh he knew how. Pulling out of his sock was a single muscle relaxer, it would be enough to keep the larger from getting too violent. Don’t ask why the demon consistently carried different types of drugs on him. He just did. He crouched silently trying to stifle his sneezes and coughs, his focus completely on taking the large male off guard. He just needed him to look away from the drink for a second.

As Rex announced his last song, Remi finally decided maybe he would cut loose, they got this far into the set with no issues, why would there be any now? His drink hand lowered at his side while he rocked his head back and forth, eyes closed shut as he absorbed the music. This was his entrance, Al quickly lurched forward and dropped the pill into Remi’s awaiting beverage, it dissolved quickly mixing within the substance undetected, Al slid back and disappeared to the other side now. The lights continued to flash crazy, and the crowd pushed up against each other, Remi quickly lifting his drink to save it from spilling. Scoffing before deciding to just chug the rest and call it a night, tossing the cup onto the already dirty floor.

Alistar snickered with a lose and flemmy cough to follow. He decided to slide his way through the crowd and to the side of the audience, closest to where they’d be going to meet Rex in the back. He wanted to see all their faces when they realize he’d been in the sea of people with them. His irritated nose was still sopping and full, it throbbed on his face and he tried to desperately rub at it to soothe the irritating sting. “Not now, nosey! We have to save it! We have important plans for these germs….” As he spoke, he was just out of range of speakers to be heard by a stranger. Who he looked over to make eye contact with. He stared at the human, that blinked with confusion toward him. Alistar blinked his own crimson eyes as they stood in awkward silence.

“Forget I said anything,” his Ruby orbs now glowing brightly as the stranger now looked to have seen a ghost, but after a few moments, he blinked and looked around himself.

“Hey bro, you seen the merch table?” Suddenly asking the demon, who’s eyes had stopped shining at this point.

“Over there,” pointing a slender finger in the opposite direction to earn a nod and a lift of the other man’s index and middle to fashion a peace sign.

“Thanks bro,” seemingly forgetting about the sickly plotting Alistar had been doing just moments before. As the stranger made his journey away from Al, the red head waited patiently while the set came to an end and people started to clear out.

“It’s time,” Al snickered, moving his spindly legs through the venue and into the back area where he would meet a very sweaty and exhausted Rex, already sparking a joint as he walked down the stage stairs.

“Duuuuude! You made it!” Rex slapped the demon on his shoulder and grinned, taking a long hit off his joint and blowing it within the space between them, shoveling them both into the dressing room.

“I did indeed, friend, it was a very good show, energetic,” smirking to himself as he looked around the room to partake in any free refreshments. Only finding a buffet of different energy drinks, alcohols, mixers and candy. The redhead blinked but turned around to meet Rex face to face, almost startling him. “Oh…”

“Hey thanks!! You feelin any better dawg? You still look pretty shit,” noticing that Al’s scleras eyes were now entirely black, large purple bags floating under his eyes.

“Nah, but I wasn’t going to miss the first home show, come on now,” winking towards the pyro before a tight breath caught in his throat. “I-Uh..Hh’HhEhh…” at this same moment Alistar struggled to keep his secret sauce contained, Biz, Meeko, Kriia and Remi all came walking in. And the second Meeko toddled herself inside, and the door closed behind her? “HEH’EZSCHh’IEW!” And almost like a bomb was set off in the room, everyone else started to realize just how poorly they were starting to feel, Remi catching a face full of Al’s release. Immediately the wolf closes his eyes and brings his arm up to defend himself as a reflex, but it’s already too late.

“Fucking SICK, dude, why are you even HERE?? I should beat…” but as the raven haired male raised his fist to sock the shit eating grin right off Al’s smug face, his arm collapsed and he found himself much weaker, like all his muscles were asleep. He furrowed his brows. “What the fuck?”

There was a click on the other side of the door, Kanai locking the only way in and out of that room , from the outside, sitting on the floor. “Okay Donnie, door’s locked,” Biz turned around quickly to shoot a look at the door and then back at Al.

“Alistar, what are you doing?” His voice suddenly very stern, Meeko gripped the large man’s arm and buried her fevering face into it.

“Hnnn…” Biz’s eye twitched as he heard his girlfriend groan in discomfort, he knew that sound, he narrowed his eyes tighter.

“Hey, you all made ME feel like YOU GUYS…Snndfff…DONT WANT ME AROUND!” Swiping the underside of his nose with the back of his hand. “I don’t…Hh’…”

“Please cover your mouth, Al,” Biz sighed shaking his head, palm on his forehead as he tried to massage the incoming headache.

“H’HEHh’DZSCHh’UE!!!! PssffF-TSCH!!” His nose twitched and stretched as his mouth opened and fumbled against his sneeze. Bottom lip dripping as he drooled slightly, almost kind of regretting the fact he left home, cause a blowjob from his bestie sounds almost as good as this whole, revenge plan.

“hAGH’SHHHEUhh!” Now Biz was sneezing, like a sudden oncoming train it just smacked right into him. He looked almost completely bewildered. “So because we wanted you to…” he crunched his nose, wiggling it in tight circles to shove away, and scratch that building, insufferable, terrible itch. His whole body feeling hot. “We wanted you to stay home cause you’re SICK Alistar, not because we don’t LIKE you,”

“I don’t like you,” Remi admitted proudly with our hesitation. Biz sighed, trying to keep his train of thought.

“….Point BEING, Most of us here don’t have any issues with you, Al, genuinely, we just didn’t also want to get sick… and now…” he paused, the room starting to feel much faster now as everything spun around him, making it difficult to keep speaking.

“Eh’KSSHOO!!” Meeko sneezed into the side of her large, clammy boyfriend, he shuddered, blushing as he heard the loud squeak of his sweet Princess.

“Oh, Darling…” he looked down at her and wiped his index under her leaking nose to clear it from her softened face. Wiping his hands on his pants only to return the palm to her burning cheek.

“N-no it’s okay I-I’m Fibe…” sniffling weakly trying to push the attention away from her.

“Look it, Al! You’ve gotten us sick!” Kriia shouted feeling empathetic toward the suffering couple to her left.

“This doesn’t explain why I can’t lift my fucking arms to make him go lights out!” Now Remi chuffed in, angry and ready to head butt the demon if he so had to. Bite his flesh off bit by bit. He didn’t care.

“I may have slipped you something in the crowd….” The red head shrunk a few sizes as he could feel the incoming heat was about to face.

“WHAT?!” The wolf exploded with rage almost completely ready to do whatever means necessary.

“Look, maybe I was being a liiiiittttleee irrational…but can’t we just enjoy this? I don’t know if you all noticed….but I think we can all agree, this is going to be a good time….” Al lifted his hands up in defense, slowly, inching his way behind Biziil to keep the irate man from riping him to shreds with his teeth. Though, he raised a single red eye brow to further insinuate the cheeky pleasure of sin.

“Yeah assuming…Rex doesn’t set the place on fire and I don’t throw up because MY SISTER AND BROTHER IN LAW ARE TWO OF THE PEOPLE IN THIS ROOM,” the black haired male still yelled though each time he spoke with such force, it was taking more and more out of him, and the virus only worked through his blood faster.

“Okay well, it’s fun for me, I just thought If I could paint the illusion that it’s a benefit for you, we could move on from this conversation,” Al shrugged his shoulders still perched behind the large polar bear man.

“I’m going to kill him,” Remi narrowed his eyes and looked up at Biziil this time.

“You can’t keep killing him,” the larger shook his head.

“But it feels good…regardless,” now looking away like a kicked puppy, he mumbled loosely.

“Okay, look, I’ll just have Kanai open the door, it’ll be fine….NAI, LET EM OUT,” he grumbled almost, while still speaking loudly enough for the hell hound to hear. Yet, there was no sound to be heard…silence.

Unknown to all of them, Kanai had barricaded the door, making sure it was secure just as Alistar instructed of him. However, Al did not say he could not explore the theatre…and there was so much to learn about human entertainment! He couldn’t resist taking a peak around.

“Is he …okay?” Kriia asked quietly , her own features flushed, her eyes lowered not just cause she’d been sharing a joint with Rex as they watched all this unfold, but she was not feeling very well, whatsoever.

“…Nai?!” Al called out again now sweating from illness AND nerves because the longer the silence went the closer Remi inched toward the demon. In turn, Al would step two inches away every time he did. “Okay…so…we might be trapped here for a bit…”

“Biz, are you SURE I can’t kill him???” Out stretching his arms to try and strangle the panicking red head.

“I’m sure, too many consequences…you’ll have to hear from Drae,” Remi shuddered at this realization. He would. Drae chastised him every time he sent the demon back to which he came. All because that one time he didn’t come back. Whatever. The wolf sighed and rolled his eyes, lowered his arms and the began sitting on one of the couches provided.

“Guess we just have to wait for idiot #2 to come back,” he finally spoke, allowing the fire to calm into a fizzling steam within him.

“Hey, that’s my idi-….Hhh’…” Alistar went to interject but found himself struggling to get it out.

“Oh for fucks sake can you just close your mouth!” Remi shouted tossing a nearby coaster at the anti-christ. It missed him just by an instance as the demon lurched forward and dodged it by blowing out.

“HIH’AESSSH’UE!” He sneezed loudly, directly across him, toward the pyro, without much conscious thought to it, truthfully.

“Oh, god…” Rex wiped off his face as the spray hit him directly in the mouth. Kriia smirked, reaching over to wipe it off with her loving thumb.

“Just got sneezed on by a Demon, babe, that’s lowkey kind of hot…” the white and red haired male looked over at his girlfriend, matching her grin and shrugging it off.

“Gotta try everything at least once,” now acting as if his intuits response wasn’t genuinely how he felt. However, if Kriia was into it, he was into it.

“I heard that,” she smirked back at him reaching up to kiss him tenderly. Their arms entangling around one another regardless of the others around them.

“Guys…can we be ss…H-..Hh’RSHH’hiiu!!” The bear snuffed loudly, taking the tissue Meeko took out of her purse to give him. “Thank you, Mouse,” he mustered that same gentle smile he always gave her.

“Nini id godda be do updet…” she sighed shaking her head solemnly, knowing all too well their poor girlfriend was going to be shocked at their current state of health.

“She is…but it’s…ah’KESHhh’yiew…just is what it is…” he sighed and the small ginger haired woman giggled reaching up with another tissue to dab, and wipe his leaking eyes and then poor reddening and pierced nose. Trying to be careful, and clean the metal as well to keep it from crusting over.

“S’k we take good care ob you baby,” reaching up to kiss him but she was caught by the sudden storm brewing from within her own sinuses. “HA’AETTCCHH’uh!” Her spit hitting Biziil directly in the middle of his once cleaned face, now undoubtedly wet again. He blushed brightly, trying to hide the fact he found it undoubtedly adorable of her to do such a thing. He cleared his throat.

“Oh! ..Bless you…darling,” Biz quickly started to dab at his face with the tissue he had clasped in his own hand, and then her face as well.

“S-Sorry B-Bear…I..” she started to apologize but was quite swiftly cut off.

“Shh..it’s quite alright, mouse, it’s not your fault…it’s his,” he looked over at Al who was ogling perversely at the two, an obvious line of drool falling from the corner of his mouth before he loudly slurked it back up and looked away, clearing his scratchy throat. “Stop enjoying this,” Biz narrowed his gaze.

“I can’t help it! It’s not my fault you’re all relatively sexy and now …afflicted with my demon germs…it’s wonderful,” he wiped a single tear from his eye as he felt warm and fuzzy all over.

“Hh—hEhTXSSHhh’ih…iit’shHIEW…FUCK!” Remi cursed loudly as he sneezed despite his best attempts to keep the rest from becoming aware. Too late, stewing in this small room only a few feet from everyone around him sneezing, his own terrible immune system failing him yet again. “How the fuck did it happen so fast?!”

“I predict the fact that I am not from here…probably mutated the virus…theoretically…of course,” the red head shrugged his tired, heavy shoulders.

“heT’CHXOO!!” Rextar now but instead of a fine mist of saliva, no it was a cloud of flames, everyone quickly jumped back, Kriia only moved slightly to the side, rubbing his back gently. “Shiiiit…sorry guys..sndfff,” rubbing his nose on the back of his performance hoodie sleeve.

“You only mildly scorched the carpet, no biggie, we can pay the damages,” Kriia shrugged trying to assure her boyfriend that everything was fine, minus the trapped in a room full of sick individuals that can’t stop sneezing, thing. Everyone looked at each other with pitiful sunken eyes, every other sound a sniffle or cough. It was roughly a 300 square ft space, it more or less, didn’t have a whole lot of elbow room. Everyone could be at most, 3 feet away from the other person.

“Dude, I’m so going to kick your ass once I have full mobility,” the wolf groaned, slumping in his chair with his head thrown back, thumb and index pinching the bridge of his nose. The thudding echoed from the center of his head to the rest of his body, he felt miserable, all he wanted was his little leopard, rubbing his head and making him soup. He lifted his head up enough to try and pull out his phone but it was pointless, there wasn’t any service in here. “Fuuuuuuck!!!” He groaned loudly throwing his head back again but the quick motion only forced the itch back up his bridge, and tickling his throat, he bit his lower lip tightly.

Alistar grinned sliding closer to the wolf trying to be quiet but was pulled backed with a tight hand on his wrist. Turning his head he was met with another ice cold stare from Biz.

“No,” the demon sighed and stood back again, crossing his arms.

“Sit,” and though everything inside of his aching vessel screamed at him to defy the large Inuit man, he decided against it and simply sat, crossing his arms.

“Fine but you can’t stop me from…” twitching and and stretching his nose with purpose before sticking his blackened index tip against the edges of his nostrils tickling it carelessly. “Hhah’AETTTSHH’uh!!! H’ETSCHU! HN’CH!” Loudly, proudly, like he had something to prove, which he did. Despite the fact they all realized he came to the show sick and had spread his germs on to them, and wanted out, they couldn’t. They’re stuck here with him. As well as the constant puffs of sickly sprays that shot from his wet lips.

“Stooooop!” Remi groaned with an exaggerated sigh to finish it, he would kill to turn these lights off right now.

“Uuuggghh….” Kriia wiggled a bit back and forth grabbing at her boyfriend’s arm. “This is too much…” feeling a mixture of embarrassment as she was turned on and terribly terribly ill.

“What’s…” but before he could get the words out..

“Ht’tchkt!!! Hhh’nGNxxt!” It was Kriia’s turn to lose control, trying to send the second into Rex’s other sleeve, but finding it hard to find privacy in such a position. She snuffled loudly, wiping her face loosely back and forth on the fabric. Rex blushed, brighter than his already sun kissed cheeks currently were. He tried to clear his throat, while he allowed his girlfriend to intimately release onto him and use his clothing as a rag.

“B-Bless you, baby,” considering maybe even just giving the demon what he wanted, a show, but he shook his head, no, not the right place or time.

“Oooo look at you two, see, I knew someone would enjoy this! We are making VALUABLE memories right now,” he tried to pull out his phone but before he could even open the app, Remi grabbed the device in one quick swoop and hucked it across the room. It shattered against the wall.

“Don’t be a fucking creep!” The wolf practically towered over him now. Fuck he was fast. Alistar rolled his eyes and lifted his palms up in defense.

“I was simply going to see…if I could contact K, that is all, I wasn’t up to anything and frankly I’m insulted you’d accuse me,” the two men stared each other down. Remi refused to believe his innocence.

“There’s no service, you know that,” slanting his dulling emerald eyes even further in accusation toward the demon.

“I forgot?” Al raised a thin red brow before suddenly he was taken by the throat, as if his head hadn’t been pounding as it was, it surely increased with the lack of oxygen to his brain now as Remi squeezed his fingers around him.

“Forgot?? Is that a question? See? Why should we ever trus-….” His eyes widened, his grasp slightly weakened just before Biz could finish standing back up to stop the man…./it/ happened.

“-hd’ISCHhh!! HI’DTSCHIEW!!” Almost like granddad finally heard him, like he was calling Alistar on speed dial. ‘Hello my son…I grant you…this blessing….’

“Thank you, Granddad….” He thought internally as a large gesture of spiddle and debris hit his entire face, Remi feeling mortified in between snuffling, he quickly let go and leaped back. Alistar realizing now, he didn’t think what he said, he had spoken it. Now the wolf was half across the room rubbing his nose from under his hoodie, almost feeling dirty, like he needed a hot shower.

“You’re fucking vile,” the raven haired male glared, turning his back.

Alistar shrugged his shoulders, not even a hint of shame written on his face, but satisfaction. “I’ve gotten what I wanted out of this, I don’t know about any of you…” he smirked before he wiped a straying trail from under his nose with the back of his hand but not the wet from Remi’s previous sneeze.

“I mean I got to play my show and once we are out of this me and Kri are def gon-..et’TCHOOO! etCHXIEW!!” Throwing his head in an upward direction to keep his heated blow outs from singeing anyone’s eyebrows clean off their faces. Regardless, a mistral of flames spewed out of him, smoke following out his nose as he slurped loudly to contain any of his salivic mess. Kriia bit her lower lip and just continued her motions of assuring and comforting back rubs. Her nails digging every so often.

“Oh, you already know me…” licking her lips before reaching to brush a few strands of his red locks away from his tear stained white and ruby eyes. They shared a moment together, while Alistar could barely contain himself. This was more than enough mental storage for later tonight. Endless imagery. If Alistar had a choice a of favorite sneeze in the room, it was Rex’s, because it came with a dark edge of danger. Nothing better than a sneeze followed by, FIRE?! Are you KIDDING ME?! This was enough to last him a life time.

Just when it was starting to get good, they all collectively heard a series of thuds at the door.

“Al, you done yet?” Kanai’s voice echoed from behind it, everyone feeling a sense of ease and relief but Al hummed lightly an index and thumb at his chin. Considerably, he could tell the hound no, and stretch this out for a painfully long time. However, he wasn’t sure how long it would take for the wolf’s blood to burn out that muscle relaxer and beat the dog shit out of him, it seemed to already be weakening. Having gotten this far alone, was a win. Best to not push his luck.

“A while ago.. why the fuck did you leave post???” He yelled back toward his best friend, when a moment of silence rolled by before the hound had any nerve to respond.

“It’s a historical theatre, Al, and you didn’t tell me I had to man the post, just barricade the door until you said, so…mind you, I did,” almost a slight edge of sass to his usually monotoned communications. He was spending too much time with that bratty pet of theirs, Drae.

“Okay, smartass, open the fucking door then,” Al hucked his foot toward the wood, making a loud banging sound. Remi snorted, trouble in paradise. He couldn’t relate since he and Levi made such a good team. They heard a serious of bangs and shifts of metal against the wood when suddenly, it came swinging open.

“If I am a smart ass does that mean it’s a compliment? Typically one’s ass does not have a brain, so therefore it has no intelligence…with that being said would tha-….” Alistar took his full blackened hand and palmed the center of Kanai’s face before pushing him clear out the door frame entryway.

“Just take me home,” shaking his head back and forth with a roll of his tired ruby orbs. As they all relatively sighed with relief and began to walk out, Biz quickly grabbed Al by the shoulder and turned him around

“Hey Al?” He spoke softly, almost suspiciously kind.

“Yeah?” Al looked at the taller male, cautiously but curiously still.

“I don’t hate you….Connie adores you, in some strange way, and I respect that…so I want you to know that despite how Remington may openly feel, me and my girls do not hate you…okay? You’re always welcome over…” the grey haired man opened his heart, and metaphorically his arms to the demon. His girl saw something in him that was more than difficult for anyone else to, but he would do anything to make amends for those thoughts that may play inside the redhead’s brain. If only for her.

“Oh…uh…thanks, Biziil…I appreciate that…but you know, I don’t, really feel that way right? I was just trying to stop Remi from serving me rare to the gates of Hell,” he chuckled, slightly shocked that the large man, cared about how he might feel if the group really did hate him. Regardless, they were friends of his pet, and in turn just more toys to play with. It was not important to him whether or not they liked him.

“Well, whether or not it was true, I just want you to know that there are people on this plain of existence that care about you….if you ever do, start to feel, anything,” the large bear followed with a chuckle, and it almost made the demon think deeply on it for a second before Meeko came stumbling out behind him.

“Bear…hot bath…home…pleeeeeaaaasssseee….” She whimpered slamming her forehead onto the middle of his back, arms slumped at her sides.

“Oh sweet girl…as you wish,” Biz quickly wrapped his strong tatted arm around her shoulders and brought her close to him before he turned to look at Al with a wink. Disappearing to the parking lot. As everyone else made their way home, Kanai walked with Alistar out to their own car.

“Where’s Drae?” The red head asked loosely, almost as if it didn’t really matter in the first place.

“He’s at home in bed watching some human drama show you like, because he misses you,” Kanai responded, unlocking the doors to the vehicle as they approached it.

“Jeez, he’s so needy,” shaking his head back and forth but feeling a slight…tingle in the base of his chest at the thought.

“He is quite persistent of our company, that must be a human thing…I have to research it when we get home…” mumbling now to himself as his brain started ticking away at the theories and possibilities.

“Okay nerd brain, just take me home so I can get my dick sucked at the LEAST with this fucking head cold I have….” He groaned rubbing at his temples. “I just know the orgasm is going to be fucking mind blowing,” unable to stop himself from snickering pridefully as they slid inside the car.

“I can imagine it would be a nice change of pace to have that feeling whilst also afflicted with that terrible one at the same time…might even possibly cure you…let me know,” the grey one looked over from the driver seat before the red head shot the hound a finger gun and a cheeky wink.

To Be Continued?!

Author’s Notes: I’m so sorry this took so long and IS so long?! Uncle Fucking Christ! (Sorry I love saying that) anyway I decided to do a part two for when Alistar comes home and Drae helps him feel relief (; it’ll be a lemon one shot Part 2 which should be easier for me to crack out than a full fic with 6 characters to keep track of Lmfao. Thanks for supporting mine and Geez’s characters! We appreciate the love it really is just the best 🥰 It’s nice to create for fun and have others just simply enjoy it for what it is. All my love 🫶🏻 @aller-geez owns Meeko, Remi, Rex, Kriia and Kanai! (also Draeko who was mentioned!)

39 notes · View notes

howl-fantasies · 2 years

Note

Hello Author-san! If you have time... I'd like to request Gotham characters realizing they've been a total douche towards [name].

I re-read all your stories recently (still amazing, like I'm reading them for the first time amazing) and I noticed that a lot of Gotham people(😆) are (most of the time) always very mean towards [name] even when [name] always clean up after them 🤔

I just wanna see them realize [name] needs some love too- 😤

Take care Author-sannnn 💛

Awwww it's so cute, thank you for your request and compliments ♥️ They weren't the best frenemies I have to say and often are ungrateful little brats with her indeed.

Don't worry, Y/N doesn't mind at all. If anything, she finds their hostility amusing. Especially coming from Oswald and Edward who she sees as moody teens: claiming they hate you but desperately asking for your help when they aren't able to do the most simple thing. The irony is just *chef kiss* 😂

It was quite hard to write about Jim since he's so attached to the law, what's right and wrong. Being a little bit nice with Y/N is as hard for him as beeing genuinely nice with Oswald. But he realizes she can be good, sort of.

Warning: English mistakes, it's not my first language, I'm working on it. Violence, bad words.

Oswald Cobblepot

"That freaking harlot!"

He was fuming, as his phone was crashed against the hard wood of his desk, Oswald cursed again thinking about the end of his call with Y/N.

Behind him, Victor watched their boss screeches like an angry bird, slapping the poor device again and again. Penguin was easy to anger, he thought. So easy, his dear wife made it a sport to irks him as many times as she could per day.

He felt his own phone buzz in his heart pocket. She broke another record doing it, he knew, winning their bet in doing so in less then 30 seconds. He owed her a calzone.

"YOU'RE NOT LISTENING AREN'T YOU VICTOR?!"

The killer first blinked. Admiring a new shade of red growing on Cobblepot's furious face. Then, shrugged in carefree way.

"I KNEW IT! Stop thinking about this stupid excuse of a woman!" yelled the little man while finishing the massacre of his now dead phone.

"Boss." He called.

"Whut now, Zsasz?!"

"Why don't you just stop working with Y/N? You can't stand her and know I'm perfectly able to annihilate about anyone in town... " Victor stated flatly.

Oswald scoffed like the bald man had insulted his dear mother. "That's utterly stupid!" He said, now throwing him a hard glare, soon joined by another scoff. "Your idiotic wife is irking, acting like she owns any freaking place she's standing in, is demanding ridiculously high compensation for anything she's asked to do"

The killer nodded at each point made, making a few "Uh-uh" here and there.

"But she's useful. And I don't have to explain every steps of my plans to her, because she already knows, Victor. That damn woman is already en route to do the job before I even have to open my mouth!" Penguin yelled angrily. At him, her or about the fact that he recognized some qualities to the woman? Zsasz didn't know.

And didn't even have the time to ask, since Oswald was now pointing him with an accusating finger. "THAT makes her, and trust me it's killing me to say it: valuable. Very valuable. But also dangerous. And you're suggesting that I stop working with her?! For what? My rivals to contact her immediately and ask her to annihilate me? When she's rivaling freaking mediums when it comes to predict my next actions?! You're very capable with your guns, but against her?! This snake-woman would destroy YOU and ME. Or more likely will use YOU to destroy ME. No. Way. Not a chance! "

Zsasz raised a bored brow. "So much faith in me, boss. It stings you know."

Still in front of him, Cobblepot slammed his elegant cane on the hard floor. "It's faith in her that I have, faith to make you do whatever she wants, without even have to break a sweat", Oswald deadpaned.

"Order me to kill her then." Shrugged the henchman without any emotion on his face or in his tone.

Cobblepot jolted like the thunder hit him. "What?!" He whisper-yelled. "Are you MAD?!" Now he was definitely yelling. "Aren't you her husband?! How dare you even suggest it?!" Pacing around like a lion inside of its cage, Penguin now used his cane to point at him. "First you want to put her on the side, taking her job, and now you want to shoot her to death?! Yes, of course, the woman deserves a strike from Karma, but this! You're supposed to be ready to die for your lover VICTOR, not be ready to be the one killing them!" Zsasz was pretty sure the walls were shaking with how loud the new King of Gotham was.

All of sudden, Oswald froze, his cane still pointing at him and his eyes wide. "You don't deserve her." He whispered before his voice was back to normal. "I forbid you to do it, Victor. I absolutely forbid you to even point the barrel of your gun at any part of her body, do you hear me?"

Zsasz's face was still blank as he shrugged and nodded. "Fair mistake, thought you hated her you know. Just wanted to help here."

Oswald gritted his teeth angrily. "If anything, be grateful for all the work she does and the affection she's showing you, when all you deserve would be her incredible silver tongue to work against you and make you stab yourself in the knee."

----------- 1 New Message --------

Oswald Cringebblepot

Go find Ed. I need to talk to him.

Y/N

Already called him, he's on his way.

Oswald Cringebblepot

Thank you. And good work.

Y/N

Did you let Strange play with your brain again Oswald?

Oswald Crazbblepot

I'm just being polite, harlot. Doesn't hurt to be from time to time.

Y/N

Ok, Creepbblepot.

-------- End of Message -------

-------- 1 New Message --------

Victor Zsasz

I'm formally forbidden to shoot you.

Y/N

My, oh my. Look at how tables have turned. Thought he would want me dead after my last pun on the phone.

Victor Zsasz

Reverse psychology.

Y/N

You never cease to amazed me.

Victor Zsasz

What can I say?

I do good work.

Y/N

👌👏

---

EDWARD NYGMA / THE RIDDLER

Calling Y/N, the second most prolific assassin in town, names was at this point a constant for him.

She never held any grudge against him for that, still answering his messages whenever they came and teasing him to no end. So what's changed?

Seated on one of the sofa's of his hideout, Riddler was intensely watching his phone. More exactly the last message sent to the woman, that she saw, he could tell, but which she didn't answer. 3 hours without a single irritating "Riddlie, RiddLame or Riddl-ED". What happened?

"Cat got your tongue? Would be the first time. Not so surprising to finally see your microscopic wit running dry." He sent.

Again. A simple "seen" under his text, but no answer. Not a single word. He tsked, clearly irritated.

"Not so surprising to get no answer when all you do is insulting her intelligence." Muttered a well-known voice from the mirror standing in the corner of the room.

"Shut it. Her so-called intelligence is nothing compare to our genius. Pointing it out isn't even an insult, it's just a fact" Snapped the man in green.

"Genius. Yes, that's what we are. But she's no simpleton. Far from it actually. And even you know that. You should be nicer with her... " Answered his reflexion in a shy voice.

"I. Said. Shut it. ED. Don't start to try to put some sickly sweet sentiments into the link I share with Y/N." Said Riddler angrily while facing the damn mirror, his eyes glaring at those much more softer he saw in front of him.

"Our link." Ed slowly answered.

Stunned by his words, Riddler felt more than he saw his head moving slightly back from the shock. "What?" He now whispered.

"Our link. Y/N is my friend too. She was even before she knew you", Ed said, straightening his shirt awkwardly.

This time, his whole body jolted. His mouth opened wide incredulously. The surprise was short though, soon replaced by hot anger.

"Friends? She didn't even talk to you, stupid! Just answered the riddles you wrote on a ridiculous card for Kringle and forgot in the interrogation room, like the idiot you are. Y/N happened to be here waiting for Jimbo to question her. You call that being friend?!" Riddler mocked.

Ed lowered his eyes but still shrugged. "She knew someone was behind the tainted mirror and ask them to tell the author of the riddles it was quite good. It was nice. And friendly." He argued.

"You're being delusional." Deadpaned Riddler. The man glanced at his phone again, in case this crazy conversation made him miss a notification from her.

"Who is delusional thinking about calling a friend someone he always mocks and insults?" Ed's voice taunted. Who would have thought the poor and nice little Ed had that in him?

"Don't. Just don't try to make me feel guilty Ed. Y/N isn't your fragile Kringle or your damn librarian! Calling each other names but still answering when being contacted IS how our friendship works. Always have been and will always be." Riddler spat, gritting his teeth angrily.

"So we can so brilliantly see." Ed chastised, his eyes opening comically as he lifted the hand holding his phone tightly.

"Y/N is a practical and logical woman, Ed. She 100% KNOWS it and don't need any praise to feel secure or any kind of exterior validation to acknowledge the brilliant mind she already knows she has! Her confidence as well as her sharp mind are why I like her so much! And it's also why she's MY friend. "

He saw the hurt he caused on Ed's face. The ex-forensic was left with no answer, his mouth wide open in shock.

"You know, I'm Ed's friend too, RiddLack-of-gentleness. But thanks for your lovely words, got me all flustered, RidDEar" Came Y/N's flat voice from his right hand. When did he call her? One look at his reflexion answered him. Ed was smiling like a kid seeing his prank working even better than he first imagined.

Now it was Riddler's turn to turn pale, opening stupidly his mouth but with no sound coming from it.

"Cat got your tongue?" The woman mocked.

Was it a screech which finally came from him? A high pitched scream? He wasn't too sure. But a very shameful sound, it was certain.

"Oh." She sounded confused for a second. "Bad time maybe? Never thought about Narcisse doing anything else than drowning himself..." Her innuendo made him livid, but still too shocked to answer intelligibility.

"Didn't want to interrupt your little self-care time dear. My texts weren't working so I called. I'll call back later" She was now purring, ending the call before he collected himself enough to yell at her.

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!" Finally boomed his voice in direction of the mirror.

"Let her know how precious she is to us" Sang Ed's voice just before he disappeared, letting Riddler see his disheveled and sweating state. Joke was on him. Definitely.

JIM GORDON

"... I don't understand. I fucking don't understand."

Rambling like a mad man was becoming his habit. A bad one if you ask any sane person. But here in Gotham? He was simply getting acclimated to the city.

"How the hell can you take it so fucking well?!" He asked Harvey, watching the old cop who was calmly sipping his coffee and enjoying a maybe too greasy donut.

Said cop stopped his chewing for a second, his eyes looking something on his right like he was contemplating what to say.

Earlier this day, Jim woke up with one of Y/N's creepy texts. A simple "RAT-A-TAT-A-TAT-A-TATAT". Last time she sent something similar, the GCPD's HQ was attacked by some crazy wannabe gangster with machine guns. So it wasn't that surprising that he carried the goosebumps with him all day, right?

Why would she inform him about an imminent attack? He didn't know. Didn't understand last time and still doesn't now. Not like he formed any kind of friendship with her. On the contrary. A simple look at his texts to her was enough to tell.

He swore he would be the one finally putting her behind Black Gates' bars. Not Arkham. She wasn't insane, or so he thought. He wasn't so sure anymore...

"Why?" He muttered again, taking his head between his hands and deciding to sit in front of Bullock. "Why am I the only one shocked by the fact that this psychopath not only sent me her creepy text but also sent it to the boss, Alvarez and you?!" He snapped.

Harvey shrugged while gulping the last drops of his beverage. "You'll get used to it." The older man finally said.

Gordon made a face. "She's a fucking criminal! Not a fellow cop, not a snitch, a freaking killing machine walking around without a care in the world. What's wrong with you guys?!"

Bullock let out a heavy sigh, rubbing his scruffy jaw in a tired way. "Neutral Evil." He finally said.

"Uh?" Asked Jim, his brow rising slowly as he leaned in his co-worker's direction.

"Neutral Evil." Harvey repeated slowly. "When the kid started to save our arses sporadically, we asked our psychiatrists to work on her case again. They decided she was Neutral Evil." He developed.

"... Sounds like a D&D thing." Gordon muttered incredulously, making Harvey laugh loudly. "Well it is, two of them are freaking nerds, always babbling about this thing. What amaze me is that you know about it. Should go play with them next Sunday if we're still breathing." He mocked, earning the middle finger from the younger cop.

"Heard kids talking about it in town. Debating which side they were going to play", Gordon detailed, making Bullock hummed and nod absently.

"Our own grown up childchiatrists took ages to decide if we had to call her Neutral or lawful Evil, since the woman has some sort of honor code." He rambled. "But, and I'm quoting them here: "Since she's a selfish little piece of shit and doesn't give a fuck about using / killing anyone for her own purpose which doesn't seem to be some sort of anti-hero or noble villain goal", they decided she was Neutral.""

Gordon nodded, waiting for more and making Harvey sigh even more. "They also stated that she was helping us because we were useful to her, in a way or another. As soon as we'll stand between her goal and her, she'll most likely put a bullet between our eyes." The older explain with a detached face.

"And you all go with it like it's something perfectly normal? How is that supposed to help me feel better?!" shouted Jim incredulously.

"Well it's not. If anything, it's supposed to make you understand that you're safe. For now. Which, in this good ol' city, is a fucking luxury let me tell you", answered the other cop in a harsh tone, his wrinkles even more accentuated by the displeased frown he was wearing.

Now that he was looking at it more intensely, Gordon noticed a little frown on the corner of Harvey's mouth. "There's more." The young cop said.

"Uh?" Asked Harvey, who leaned back in his seat. His porture seemed tensed. "What now, what are you talking about?". He growled.

"There is something more with Y/N. Something you're not telling me." Said the young cop suspiciously. And the reaction he got from Bullock just confirmed it.

"You all but quoted psychiatrists, only carefully talking about what their opinion is. But never put yours. It's not like you, we both know you're far more judgemental than this and usually don't hesitate to tell everyone what you think about someone or something. So, what are you hiding, Harvey?" He asked lowly, paying attention to not be heard by their co-workers.

Bullock's eyes grew wide for only a second. A little second which definitely convinced Gordon to dig further. "What. Harvey?" He pressed.

The other cop tsked angrily then cursed a few times. "Ok. Ok. Just fucking stop frowning like I was confessing a murder or you'll get the whole damn room's attention." Harvey spat in a hushed tone. He took a long minute to inspire deeply. "Remeber when you were abducted by those crazy salary men, who decided to organize hunger games for a fucking job?" Jim nodded slowly.

"Who do you think helped us finding you? Uh? A little angel in charge of your freaking safety? Sorry to tell you this, but your angel likes black leather and rocket launchers a little too much." Jim opened his mouth to protest, or, at least try to argue that she may have needed him in one of her twisted evil plans.

But Harvey made a 'no' with his head. "You were tracking her like a hunting dog for the blowing of an entire building. If anything your death would have been better, for her." Said the older.

"Maybe not on long term", countered Gordon. "We now know she's quite good at scheming and being two or three steps ahead anyone. One skill she has in common with Cobblepot". He added.

Harvey nodded but still seemed pretty sceptical. "The betrayal too, then. Since she was the one who send a text to Montoya and Allen when her dearest husband came here to fetch you, mate."

Now that news totally stunned him. Jim was looking like a fish out of water. "Why would she-..." Harvey shrugged. "Maybe she knew Zsasz was quite in the mood to cut any members you wouldn't need to talk to Falcone that day. Maybe out of fucking generosity. Who knows. But the fact is she still saved your life, yes she did. And not only once." The older man grunted.

"She's a manipulative and a selfish bitch most of the time, yes she is. But I assure you, she's more Lawful-bullshit than our clowns of psychiatrists give her credit for. She's not good. Absolutely not. But I'm sure she has plans for Gotham, so much more than making it her little killing playground. What exactly? I do not know. But you seem to have earned a place in her grand scheme. As well as the Wayne kid, who she helped too by the way. Sometimes even for free." He said.

Jim closed his mouth but was getting paler. "She worked with the kid?!" He breathed, feeling panic starting to take his body.

"I also owe her my life, Jim. God knows I'm no good cop, but she still decided to keep me alive, sending me infuriating bullshit since she was 15. How do you think I was able to survive so long in this hell hole, aside from my natural charm, charisma and shady connexions? She's not good. But sometimes she isn't all bad."

The buzz of Gordon's phone brought back their attention to the room. He got it out of his back pocket, only to see a text from her: "10"

10 what? Guys, feets away from their HQ?

Another buzz. "9".

It was freaking seconds. She was sadistic enough to instigate this kind of nerves breaking game.

"8". He raised his head in total panic, quickly showing the texts to Harvey.

"7". "FUCKING HELL ! EVERYBODY TAKE COVER! NOW!"

"6"

Chaos. At Bullock's scream, all cops in the GCPD ducked under or behind something, pulling out their guns.

"5".

"Someone is going to shoot us!" Jim heard himself yell.

"4". "Get ready to open fire!"

"3"

"2"

"1"

A deafening explosion boomed outside, just in front of the GCPD's main gates. Nobody dared to move, or even breath. Ready to shoot at any moment.

But after a long minute and nothing happening, glances started to land on him and Bullock. So much, they felt the urge to bolt out of their hidding spot to rush near the doors, guns held firmly in their hands.

They exchanged a quick glance before slowly opening a door with one hand, the other ready to pull the trigger.

There, in front of the police station, was standing a white van. Well, more the white burning carcass of a van to be honest. The vehicle seemed to have been stopped brutally by a rocket. Disfigured corpses were laying all around it, staining the hard cold ground and the dirty snow in red.

"Fucking hell" Breathed Harvey on his left, getting is full attention on something planted directly on the snow.

"Is that... -" Jim started incredulously.

"A rocket launcher with a bow attached to it and a decapitated head where the rocket should be? Your answer is a fucking yes, Gordon", grunted Bullock also stunned.

Jim didn't even have the time to say something else. A little music suddenly resonated near where the rocket launcher was oddly standing. Exactly like the irritating music you would hear coming from a happy birthday card.

Gordon's phone buzzed again in his pocket and he quickly grabbed it.

------ 1 New Message -----

Y/N

Happy upcoming birthday Jimbo. Hope you liked my present.

-------- End of message ------

"What the hell" He muttered, looking at Harvey in hope of some kind of explanation.

The older cop blinked stupidly while looking at the text then put his attention back on the creepy present. Though his observations were cut short by Jim's shocked voice.

"There is something inside of the mouth" He said.

Both of them slowly approached the beheaded head. As soon as they reached it, the Happy birthday music stopped, replaced by a heavy silence. Jim raised his right hand and, with caution, put the mouth apart, grabbing something solid and sticky from all the blood.

"What is it?" Pressed Harvey while nervously glancing around.

Jim opened his hand with a grimacing face, only to see a rectangular shaped plastic thing. "USB key", he whispered.

Again, the happy birthday music came to life. Only a few meters from them, making them jump in surprise. Here, standing on the other side of the road was Y/N, her arms nonchalantly crossed under her breasts. Her face flashed a quick sadistic grin, just before she raised her right hand in the air, her index finger pointing at something behind them.

Harvey and him followed her cue to look and turned around, only to see a huge advertising panel, which had on it Galavan's face and a "Vote Galavan" just under it. The two turned in her direction again, just in time to see her making a ridiculous "hello" motion with her hand then turning on her heels to disappear in a shady alley.

"Do you think the gang she shot and Galavan have something to do with each other?" Tried Harvey. The old man looked at his still very pale face, seeing his eyes glance at the USB key.

"Probably." He whispered.

"Well, seems like we'll live to see another day", said Bullock casually, trying to make him come out of his muteness.

What was it all about? Thought Gordon. Suddenly, he remembered the brief exchange he had with the woman about Galavan and his suspicions concerning his true motives for the city. Was she trying to help?

------- 1 New Message ------

Jim Gordon

Why did you helped us?

Y/N

Pretty sure the happy birthday musical card was enough of a cue for you to figure it out, Gordeaf.

Jim Gordon

Just because my birthday is in two days, you decided to save the whole GCPD with taking those thugs lives? Excuse me to be suspicious.

Y/N

It wasn't my gift, Jim. This was a mere bonus.

Jim Gordon

Why the USB key then?

Y/N

Since you were lacking elementary common sense during our last little chit chat session, I decided to offer you one. Make a good use of it.

Jim Gordon

What Alvarez, my boss and Harvey had to do with it?

Y/N

Nothing. They're too handsome, talented or stupidly fun to be wasted on a petty little shooting. Have a nice day on the Good side James.

--------- End of messages ------

"My ego wants to identify as the handsome or talented one, but I'm pretty sure I'm the stupidly fun one" grunted Harvey who was reading the whole conversation from above his shoulder. "Meh, still alive and grateful for it", he added just before padding his shoulder friendly.

"Yeah. Still alive and grateful for it. I supposed", Jim hesitantly replied.

A/N I hope you liked it! 🥰

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