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xxspringmelodyxx · 2 months

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Why Her and Not me?

Here part III is! I hope you all enjoy it! I also wanted to thank you all so much for the love and support on this story! I honestly wasn’t expecting this much feedback, so once again, thank you my lovelies! Enjoy~

Gojo Satoru x F!Reader x Geto Suguru (Angst)

Part I | Part II | Part IV

Several weeks had passed and things were starting to look better for you. Your heart felt lighter, your smile was more genuine, and the weight of your past relationship with Toru seemed to be gradually lifting. You found solace in the supportive presence of your friends, especially Suguru, whose unwavering support and understanding had become a source of comfort during these tumultuous times.

Word of Osaka and Toru making their relationship official spread around fast, and it didn’t take long for it to get to you. At first, hearing about Osaka and Toru's official relationship stung a little. It was a reminder of what could have been, a bittersweet realization that the person you once loved loved someone else. But with each passing day, you found yourself accepting their relationship, understanding that it was time to let go of the past and focus on your own healing journey.

And instead of dwelling on what could have been, you threw yourself into spending quality time with your friends, relishing in the laughter and camaraderie that filled the air whenever you were together. Suguru, in particular, had become a constant presence by your side, serving as a beacon of hope during moments of doubt and uncertainty.

Those weeks turned into months, and as the time flew by, you couldn't help but notice the subtle shifts in your relationship with Suguru. What started as a platonic friendship had evolved into something deeper, a connection that resonated on a soul-deep level. His presence brought you comfort in ways you never thought possible, and you found yourself drawn to him in ways you couldn't fully understand. It was in the little things—the way he would brush a stray hair from your face, the warmth of his hand on your shoulder when you needed reassurance, the genuine concern in his eyes whenever you spoke of your struggles—that made you realize there was something more between you.

You found comfort in his company, cherishing the moments you spent together, whether it was sharing quiet conversations late into the night or simply enjoying each other's presence in comfortable silence. There was an unspoken understanding between you, a sense of mutual respect and admiration that only deepened with each passing day.

But amidst the growing bond between you and Suguru, there lingered a lingering sense of uncertainty. You couldn't shake the feeling that there was something holding you back, a shadow of doubt that whispered reminders of your past heartache with Toru. Despite your growing feelings for Suguru, you couldn't help but wonder if you were ready to open your heart to love again, to risk being hurt once more.

Yet, despite your reservations, you couldn't deny the undeniable pull towards Suguru, the magnetic attraction that seemed to draw you closer with each passing moment. And as you navigated the complexities of your emotions, one thing became clear: no matter what the future held, Suguru had become an integral part of your life, a beacon of light in the darkness, guiding you towards a path of healing and self-discovery.

However, there were still moments every now and then where you caught your mind going back to Toru. It had been a good 6 months since his confession about Osaka, and you did your best to keep your distance and tread carefully around him, mindful of the emotional turbulence that lurked beneath the surface.

Occasionally, you would find yourself in Toru's company, the echoes of your shared history a reminder of both joy and pain. You always made sure, however, that whenever you were with Toru, either Shoko, Hime, or Suguru were with you. You weren’t quite ready to be alone with Toru, not yet anyways.

You figured he wouldn’t notice, and you were right…for a while. Toru seemed completely consumed by his newfound relationship with Osaka. He appeared to be thoroughly enjoying his time with her, often seen buying her gifts and showering her with hugs and subtle kisses. Their affectionate displays only served to reinforce the growing distance between you and Toru, highlighting the undeniable shift in his focus and priorities.

However, it wasn’t long before he started to notice your absence during his relationship. At first, he brushed it off, attributing it to your busy schedule or other commitments. But as days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months, your presence grew increasingly scarce. A sense of unease began to settle in the pit of his stomach as he found himself missing the easy banter and shared laughter that characterized your guys’ time together, the void left by your absence becoming more pronounced with each passing day. It was as if a piece of the puzzle was missing, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't shake the feeling of incompleteness that lingered in your absence.

Whenever Toru and Osaka ventured out together, certain places would trigger memories of him and you, especially your bakery. Passing by it every day with Osaka, Toru couldn't help but be engulfed by the tantalizing scents wafting from its doors. And despite knowing your schedule, he would linger around, hoping to catch a glimpse of you. Maybe even get a chance to finally speak to you. Sometimes, he would wait nearly an hour, yearning to talk to you, to see you again. But you never emerged, leaving him with a hollow ache in his chest.

What’s worse is that he now finds his thoughts often drifting to you, wondering where you were and what you were doing. Were you safe? Were you with someone he knows? Were you out and about having the best time of your life without him? He himself couldn’t believe how much you were on his mind. Even when he had Osaka, the girl he had been wanting to date for a while now, he found himself yearning for your company instead. There was something about you that she couldn’t replace, and it was becoming more and more obvious each day.

Beyond the longing for your presence and the fun that came along with you, Toru found himself missing your baking. Despite Osaka's efforts to replicate your treats, they never quite measured up. Your creations were perfection, each bite a symphony of flavors that left him craving more. It was as if every pastry, every loaf of bread, was crafted just for him, tailored to satisfy his every craving.

As time passed, Toru also couldn't ignore the growing realization that he and Osaka had little in common. Their conversations felt forced, their interests diverging more with each passing day. She would suggest activities that held no appeal to him, and he struggled to find common ground with her. It was as if they were two puzzle pieces forced together, their edges rough and incompatible, unable to fit into each other's lives seamlessly.

Despite his best efforts to focus on his budding romance with Osaka, Toru couldn't shake the feeling that something was amiss. It was as if his heart was pulling him in a different direction, toward someone he never expected to fall for. And as he grappled with his conflicting emotions, he couldn't help but wonder if perhaps he had been looking for love in all the wrong places.

As he reflected on the dynamics of his relationship with Osaka, Toru couldn’t help but feel a twinge of guilt for the growing distance between you. The more he tried to immerse himself in his newfound romance, the more he found himself longing for the familiarity and comfort of your companionship. Yet, he couldn’t bring himself to confront these conflicting emotions, choosing instead to bury them beneath a facade of contentment, hoping they would eventually fade away with time.

Despite his outward appearance of happiness, Toru couldn’t get rid of the nagging feeling that he was living a lie, pretending to be someone he wasn’t just to fit into the mold of the perfect boyfriend. Deep down, he knew that his heart belonged elsewhere, tethered to you by an invisible thread that refused to be severed. And as he grappled with the weight of his emotions, he couldn’t help but wonder if he was destined to remain caught between two worlds, torn between duty and desire, until he found the courage to follow his heart. Maybe he just needed to give everything a little more time and everything would soon fall into place…Yeah! That’s it. All he needs is time…

———

One evening, you decided to invite the group over for a movie night, including Toru and Osaka. It was true that you still had mixed feelings with them, but overall, you were still their friend. And you weren’t cruel to invite everyone else but them. Besides, it’s been a while since you all have hung out together as a group, so it would be good to have everyone back together again.

———

I heard a knock on my door, recognizing the voices of Shoko and Hime from the other side.

“Y/n! Hurry up and open the door already! It’s freezing out here! Honestly, you should just leave it unlocked at this point for the amount of times we come over,” Shoko complained from the opposite side. I chuckled as I quickly made my way to the door and swung it open, greeted by the sight of Shoko and Hime bundled up against the cold.

“Hey bestie! Look what I brought!” Shoko exclaimed, proudly displaying a couple of bottles of alcohol.

I rolled my eyes playfully at her while Hime shook her head in disapproval, her fingers pinching the bridge of her nose.

”I tried to tell her not to get so much, but she didn’t listen,” Hime sighed.

”Shoko, you do realize this isn’t going to be a frat party, right? It’s just a casual hangout,” I reminded her, making her pout.

”Yeah, but we can still have some fun! Besides, it was on sale!” Shoko defended her choice of beverages.

”Fine, fine. Just don't overdo it, alright? We don’t want a repeat of last time…” I cautioned, remembering a particularly rowdy night. Shoko had drank way too much for her own good and it resulted in us having to run after her down the street. She was buttnaked, running freely around. Eventually, we caught up to her, but not before the cops got involved. She was dressed properly and taken in.

”Oh come on, you guys are no fun! Besides, it was a great memory, don’t you guys think?” Shoko asked with a playful grin.

”Not when we had to pay a hefty fine to bail you out!” Hime chimed in, earning a sheepish grin from Shoko. She put her hands up in defeat, not wanting to get a rise out of Hime.

”Okay, okay! I won’t drink too much… probably,” Shoko relented, eliciting a groan from Hime.

Suddenly, a familiar voice interrupted our banter, causing us to turn around.

“…Osaka?” Shoko began, momentarily confused. Hime quickly nudged her, prompting a correction.

”I-I mean…O-Osaka! You’re here!” Shoko amended, rubbing her side from Hime's nudge.

”Yeah! Me and Toru brought some snacks to share. I made them myself!” Osaka announced, holding up a box of homemade treats. I smiled, pushing past Shoko and Hime to grab onto Osaka’s arm.

”They look amazing, Osaka. Please come in. You must be freezing out there,” I welcomed her, noticing the curious glances exchanged between Shoko and Hime.

”I can’t imagine they’re anything like your sweets, Y/n, but I hope they at least satisfy you. Toru is constantly talking about how great your food tastes,” Osaka said sweetly, making me, Hime, and Shoko tense up.

”H-He does?” I asked, feeling a familiar ache in my chest.

”Mhmm! I don’t think a single day passes where he doesn’t stop by your bakery. He always talks about how you make the best Kikufuku! Sometimes he stops by to say hi,” Osaka continued, unaware of the tension she had stirred.

Guilt began to build up in my stomach. I knew about him coming to my shop, and I deliberately made sure to stay in the back when he visited, avoiding him. It was just too much for me to talk to him…alone especially.

“Y-Yeah…” I responded weakly.

”Though, I can see why. Your baking is the best! Anytime I talk to my friends back in my hometown, I always tell them about your desserts and how amazing your food is! You’ve sure got a talent for that, Y/n!” Osaka praised, making me smile softly at her kindness.

Guilt nagged at me as I accepted the sweets from Osaka. I couldn't shake the feeling that her presence was a constant reminder of what I had lost.

”I’m sure these sweets taste amazing, Osaka. Now, you go sit over there… and try to ignore the alcohol that Shoko brought. I’m pretty sure it's all just for her,” I teased, hoping to lighten the mood. She nodded, sitting politely on the couch, waiting for Toru to come in.

As I turned to retrieve some movies from my room, I felt a firm grip on my arm, pulling me into the bathroom. I let out a small shriek as I found myself face to face with Shoko and Hime. Osaka looked behind her to see no one. Confused, she looked both ways to see where you went, but saw no sight of you. She shrugged, thinking you just went back to your room. Little did she know, you were being investigated as to why you brought her here in the first place.

”Why is she here?!” Shoko demanded, her frustration evident.

”What do you mean?”

“Y/n, don’t play dumb. You shouldn’t have invited her! It’s only going to make things worse,” Hime interjected, her tone serious.

I listened to their concerns, but a part of me couldn't bear to exclude Osaka and Toru, no matter how much it hurt to see them together.

"I know, but I can’t just invite everyone over and not them. Besides, it’s not their fault that they fell in love with each other. I can’t hate them forever just because Toru chose her over me,” I reasoned, my voice tinged with sadness.

”Yes you can!” Shoko argued, but I shook my head. I placed my hand on theirs, looking them deep in the eyes.

“No, girls. Just because things are complicated doesn't mean we should shut them out," I interjected, recognizing their concerns but unwilling to let bitterness dictate our actions. "We've always valued our friendships and treated each other with kindness, no matter what. Let's not forget that now."

Shoko and Hime exchanged a silent glance, their expressions softening as they considered my words. After a moment, Shoko sighed and nodded in reluctant agreement. "Fine, but I'm keeping an eye on them," she declared, her protective instincts still in full force.

Hime offered a small smile of reassurance. "We'll stick together, no matter what," she affirmed, her loyalty unwavering.

With a collective understanding, we stepped out of the bathroom, ready to face the evening with resolve and unity.

As I opened the door to rejoin the others, a tall figure stood before me, catching me off guard. Another small shriek escaped my lips as I began to fall backwards. Thankfully, the tall figures hand wrapped around my waist, pulling me close to him.

”Woah, sorry n/n. I didn’t mean to startle you. I was just wondering where you were when all I saw in your living room were Osaka and Toru,” Suguru explained, his eyes warm and apologetic.

Shoko, Hime, Osaka, and Toru observed the scene unfold, each reacting differently to the unexpected encounter.

Despite the mixed emotions swirling inside me, I managed a smile as Suguru pulled me into a comforting embrace.

“I’m just glad you're here, Sugu!” I said, grateful for his presence amidst the turmoil of conflicting emotions. Toru saw the warm embrace you gave to Suguru and couldn’t help but feel…off about it. Whatever that feeling was, he didn’t like how it felt.

“Let’s get this started already! I’m starving!” Shoko declared, eager to break the tension.

Suguru's arrival seemed to lighten the mood, and soon we were all gathered in the living room, ready to enjoy our movie night together.

———

As the night unfolded, laughter and conversation filled the air, creating a sense of warmth and connection that enveloped the group. Despite the initial awkwardness between you, Toru, and Osaka, the shared moments of joy and lighthearted teasing between everyone helped to bridge the divide, easing the tension that had been simmering beneath the surface.

As the movie played, you found yourself stealing glances at Suguru, noticing the way his eyes sparkled with amusement at a particularly funny scene. A smile tugged at the corners of your lips as you reveled in the easy comfort of his presence, grateful for the genuine connection you shared.

Meanwhile, Toru's gaze seemed to linger on you more often than not, a subtle shift that didn't go unnoticed by Suguru or your friends. Despite his efforts to engage with Osaka, there was an unmistakable tension in the air, a silent acknowledgment of the unspoken feelings that lingered between you and Toru.

———

As the evening wore on, Toru found himself increasingly preoccupied with the sight of you and Suguru. Despite the movie playing in the background, his attention was drawn to the quiet whispers and shared laughter between you two on the couch. He couldn't help but feel a twinge of envy as he observed the natural chemistry that seemed to flow effortlessly between you and Suguru.

He watched as Suguru poked your opposite shoulder to trick you into thinking Shoko tapped you. He watched as you playfully punched him, smiling at his tomfoolery. He watched you two ignore everything around you, acting as if you two were the only ones left in the world.

Each shared smile, every shared glance—it felt like a silent declaration of a bond that Toru couldn't quite comprehend. As much as he tried to focus on enjoying the movie night, his mind kept wandering back to you, to the way you leaned in closer to Suguru, your laughter ringing through the room like music to his ears.

And It wasn't just the laughter that stirred a sense of longing within Toru; it was the way you looked at Suguru with such genuine affection and admiration. It was as if you were sharing an inside joke, a secret language that excluded him from the intimacy you shared with Suguru.

Toru couldn't help but recall the times when it was him by your side, sharing those stolen moments of connection. He missed the easy bond you once shared, the way you would listen to him with unwavering attention, making him feel like the most important person in the room. He missed the way your eyes sparkled as he talked to you about the randomest things in the world, the way your giggle filled his chest with pride, the way your voice helped calm him down when he needed it most. He desperately missed you and the way you made him feel…and yet there you were, acting the same way around someone else that wasn’t him. As he watched you and Suguru, he couldn't shake the feeling of being an outsider looking in.

As Osaka snuggled up to him, Toru was busy in his own mind as an uneasy feeling settled in the pit of his stomach. Despite her presence beside him, he found himself drifting into a reverie, reminiscing about moments shared with you.

"This movie is boring..." Osaka's voice broke through his thoughts, pulling him back to the present. He glanced up, noticing the familiar scenes unfolding before him. It was one of your favorite movies, a film you'd watched countless times together. The movie held little interest for him compared to the memories it evoked. The thought of you made him smile faintly, recalling how you'd eagerly convinced him to watch it, even if he had already seen it with you numerous times already.

The memory brought a sense of warmth and nostalgia, a stark contrast to the chill that seemed to permeate his current relationship. He remembered your playful insistence, your determination to lift his spirits and distract him from the burdens of his work. It was a small gesture, yet it spoke volumes about your caring nature and the depth of your bond.

As he watched the movie, snippets of moments spent with you replayed in his mind like scenes from a cherished film. He remembered the way you'd prepare his favorite snacks, your gentle touch as you comforted him through his worries, and the soothing sound of your voice as you reassured him that everything would be okay.

Despite his best efforts to focus on his current relationship, his heart couldn't help but yearn for the warmth and familiarity he found in your presence. And It was in that moment that Toru realized the depth of his feelings for you. You weren’t just a friend; You were someone he couldn't bear to lose. And yet, he couldn't deny the growing distance between them, a gap that seemed to widen with every stolen glance between you and Suguru.

As the night went on, Toru continued to find himself lost in his own thoughts, grappling with the realization that he might have let something precious slip through his fingers.

Little did he know, your feelings were also beginning to shift, your heart drawn towards Suguru in ways you never expected. And as the lines between friendship and something more blurred, the stage was set for a love triangle that would test the bonds of friendship and loyalty in ways none of you could have anticipated.

________________

Part IV coming soon? Depending on my school schedule (I hate you college!!)

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unowers · 10 months

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ive never drawn something so fast in my entire life

#milgram #kazui mukuhara

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lunajay33 · 11 months

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Brother Trouble❤️‍🩹

Summary: You went out looking for formula with Glenn and Maggie and came across Merle, your boyfriends lost brother and things don’t go well

•Masterlist•

Ive been with the group since the start at the quarry, I first was drawn to Daryl but was always nervous to approach him when Merle was around but once he was gone me and Daryl grew to love each other and have been together ever since the incident at the CDC

“Let’s get Judith a toy, it’ll be good for her to play with something!” I said to Glenn as he went into the store

After we picked up what we needed we loaded it into the truck and we’re about to leave but I still had a basket in my hand

“Well hello, what are you all doing out here” I heard, turning to see Merle with a gun held up to us, making Maggie and Glenn to take out theirs and raise them

“Merle, you’re alive” Glenn stated

“Woah Woah Woah, Glenn and y/n good to see y’all, is Daryl still with ya, is he alive?” He asked as he lowered his gun

“He’s still alive”

“Can you take me to him”

“You stay here and we will tell him” Glenn said with his gun still held up

“Come on just take me to where you are”

“No like I said we will bring him here”

I could see the anger rise on Merle’s face and I knew there was trouble, it happens so fast, he pulled out a gun from his pants and shot, I ducked and when I looked up he hand his makeshift arm knife to Maggie’s throat

“Get in the car now or she dies” Merle said pushing his knife harder against Maggie

I dropped the basket and we all got in the truck and we drove off to god knows where

~~~~~~

We were all in esperante rooms, tied to a chair but I could hear everything, I could hear Glenn get beat to a pulp and Maggie crying then it was my turn when merle came in with the governor

“Now who do we have here?” The governor asked but I didn’t say a word, I wasn’t really one to talk much, maybe that’s why Daryl liked being around me but I knew from the pasted that merle hated it

“She not talk or something?” He asked merle

“Oh she talks, she just a freak that never speaks when spoken to” Merle said as he walked behind me and held his knife to my throat like he did Maggie

“Where is my brother huh?” He asked as he lightly slide the knife across my neck enough to draw blood

I still didn’t break, the prison was our home I couldn’t sell that out

“Untie her” the governor said and Merle was quick to cut the ropes and make me stand

“Now take off your clothes” he said and I was stunned

“No”

“Oh she does speak, you will take off all your clothes or your buddies in the next rooms will be dead by night fall” he said glaring into my soul

I felt sick but I couldn’t risk the lives of my family

I took off all my clothes with shaky hands and covered myself with my hands

“Do what you have to go get her to talk, I’ll be back later and you better have an answer” he said the Merle as he left the room

I looked at merle scared for my life

He was smirking and started to cut me all over my body, leaving blood drip all over my body, the pain was unbearable and he started hitting on me like he did to Glenn, after a while of this torture I was left on the floor feeling like a shell of a person

I still didn’t rat out or home and he left, I sat in the corner naked, bloody and bruised

I heard trouble in the room over and Maggie and Glenn crying then I heard Maggie tell them about the prison

I sighed but understood how hard it was for them

“Y/n! Are you okay?” I heard Maggie yell out

“Im fine” i answered back not wanting to stress them any further

I waited in that room for a while just praying Daryl would come and rescue me and make me feel alright again and that’s when I heard guns, and fighting

The door to my room was being kicked in and that when I saw him, my savior and my love

“Daryl” I sighed feeling relieved

He ran up to me with the others at the door

He looked so mad but his eyes showed hurt, sadness and concern

He took off his flannel and wrapped it around me

“Come on peach, we’re gonna get you home” he said as he lifted me up and supported me by holding my waist and helping me walk out

We followed the others and I tried to keep up even though I felt so weak

Bullets were flying and gun shots were all I heard, axel got hit but the rest of us got out

We got to the truck and I instantly passed out on Daryl’s lap knowing I was safe now

~The next day~

I woke up in mine and Daryl’s cell and tried sitting up but groaned at the pain, I looked down and I was all patched up and dressed in Daryl comfy clothes

“Daryl?” I called out and in a second he was next to the bed

“Hey peach, how’re ya feelin?” He asked as he brushed my hair back, just the feeling of him near me makes me feel better, but I still have that ache inside

“I’m fine”

“Don’t lie to me, how I found ya that’s not fine, what happened?”

“I’m not ready yet” I said looking away feeling guilty, I know I’m evil and sick with Merle but he was the only family Daryl had left and I felt so conflicted

“I’m here when yer ready my peach, now come on let’s get some food in ya” he said picking me up and bring me out to the eating area

~Few days Later~

I got up late still trying to deal with what happened and when I walked out to help Beth with Judith I saw Merle talking with the others

I felt my heart drop and I felt sick again but this time I physically got sick just from the thought of being near him

I ran to a near by bin and threw up, I felt a hand rub my back and I knew it was Daryl

“Ya alright?” He asked

“What is he doing here Daryl?” I asked as my voice quivered

“He left that place I couldn’t leave him out there”

“Y’all seem pretty chummy brother” Merle said from across the room

“Well ya they’ve been together for a long time” Beth stated

“This is yer bitch” he asked shocked

“Watch yer mouth” Daryl groaned glaring at him

“If I knew I wouldn’t ‘ave…..” he trailed off

“What? Wouldn’t ‘ave done what?” Daryl asked standing up

“The governor he….he made me do it”

“You’re lying, he left the room you could’ve just left me” I stated

Daryl looked between me and Merle and it clicked

“YOU DID THIS TO HER?” Daryl yelled

“Dumb bitch put up a fight I had to get answers” that’s when Daryl got up close to him completely vivid

I couldn’t stand being in here anymore, I snuck out the cell block and sat out side

I tried to get the memories out of my head but it just kept playing over in my head

“You know the governor did something similar to me when we were there” I heard next to me and it was Maggie

“I don’t want to talk about it, I just want to forget, I feel so dirty”

“I think you’ll feel better when you get this off your chest and tell Daryl” she says as she gets up and leaves being replaced by Daryl himself

“I wouldn’t have brought him here if I knew, I’m sorry peach, I hate that I wasn’t there earlier to save ya”

“I feel wrong, I feel so dirty and I don’t know if I’ll ever feel better again, what they made me do, what they did to me”

“What did he do peach?”

I sighed realizing I need to tell him

“They made me take off all my clothes, they said if I didn’t they’d kill Glenn and Maggie, then….Merle tortured me, cut me up until I was just blood, beat me until he got too tired, humiliated me and all the others saw me like that when you saved me, I just don’t wanna feel like this anymore” I said crying feeling Daryl pull me close

“I’ll never let anything happen to ya again, I’m s’ sorry, I’ll get rid of him immediately”

“You can’t kick out your brother Daryl, I don’t wanna hurt you by doing that” I said

“He ain’t my brother anymore after doing that to you, to my peach, all I care about is how yer feeling and can’t have that when he’s around, plus I’ll try and kill ‘im if I have to be near him knowing he hurt ya”

“I love you so much Daryl, more than anything” I said looking up at him

“Love ya too, yer my world and nothin’ll ever hurt ya again”

~~~~~~

Thanks for reading everyone lmk what you thought and leave suggestions for more walking dead imagines

#daryl dixion imagine #twd daryl #daryl dixon #twd fanfiction #twd x reader #twd fluff #twd rick #twd michonne #twd negan #daryl dixon twd

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kaseyskat · 9 months

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had some thoughts about dood (yes ive settled on that spelling i like it) and missing scenes and stuff anthony would never do because he doesn't like roleplaying with himself and i very hastily wrote them our for your pleasure. enjoy!

It happens so fast.

Sparrow doesn’t even comprehend… everything that is going on. The Doodler talks in a voice that he recognizes from childhood dreams, and the children are talking, and Willy is talking, and then Lark pulls out his gun and is aiming it directly at Normal, and Sparrow is frozen, frozen in place, helpless but to watch and to stare at his twin and shake his head and plead with his eyes and think: this is not how I imagined this fight.

Once, he had dreamed of this fight. It was glorious, the rendition in his head. The Doodler was a mighty adversary, one who wanted to bring a reign of terror and chaos upon the land, and from a young age, Sparrow knew that he and Lark were the ones destined to rise up, bear their arms in kind, fight the Doodler and win.

But the Doodler isn’t a mighty adversary here, it’s just… scared, and alone. Is this really what Lark saw when he glimpsed into its mind?

And Lark still has a gun pointed at Normal. Realistically, Sparrow knows that he’s aiming for the Doodler, because that’s what they’re supposed to do, right? Fight the Doodler and win? It makes sense, and yet it doesn’t, because no version of their fight would result in their family getting hurt.

But that’s already happened. Our family is already torn to shreds! Sparrow wants to scream, wants to call out, but he is frozen and helpless and can only breathe a sigh of relief when Normal says… something to Lark and Lark puts his gun down.

He’ll find out what Normal said later. Now, they have a fight to win, and this is one that Sparrow doesn’t feel wordlessly, strangely guilty about.

And he crumples. And he drags himself back to his feet just in time to watch Willy flash away, leaving only the form of the Doodler that Sparrow has pointedly avoided looking at until now.

It could be a regular teenager, if teenagers morphed in and out of time and space, crackling with static energy. For a second, Sparrow comprehends it – the way the Doodler resembles, vaguely, the form that he had drawn when he was ten and wanted to give shape and dimension to the being that creeped into his dreams and spoke to him in whispered tones – before it shifts, and Sparrow only sees himself.

Doodler-Sparrow is small, quiet, big eyes staring Sparrow down as their form flickers from cardigans to dresses, hair going blonde and then dark again, eyes flashing green to amber and back to green. It’s dizzying: Sparrow quickly looks away, taking a deep breath even as it continues to look at him, and look at him, and Scary is reading something but it is still staring at him.

Then, quietly. “Hen?”

Sparrow inhales.

It is no secret that he misses his father terribly. Cutting himself off hadn’t been a personal choice: in fact, he still regularly calls his parents, tries making awful smalltalk, incorporates elements of his life that he liked into his own parenting, does his best for Hero and for Normal. And, and it isn’t like Henry is dead! Just… lost.

That was Sparrow’s fault too, wasn’t it?

“Hen is my father,” he says quietly, watches as Doodler-Sparrow shifts to look more like a younger version of his father staring at him in horror– in the fear of losing him forever, of having already lost him, or somewhere bitterly in between. “Hello… what did the kids call you? Dood?”

They nod, taking a step back as Sparrow steps forwards, wary. Arms curl around them, and its form flickers again, right back to the younger version of himself.

“Dood,” Sparrow repeats, and he snorts, shaking his head. “Alright, Dood. May I ask: do you remember anything of being… with my father? Hen?”

“I…” the Doodler – Dood, rather – takes another nervous step back, and Sparrow is forced to look down at the shadows they cast against the floors of the church to avoid the headache building behind his eyes. “It’s… hard. But I think you were beautiful.”

Despite himself, Sparrow smiles.

“Then I suppose you don’t remember my name,” he says, softly. “But I’m Sparrow. I gave you your name once, a long time ago.”

“The mascot,” Dood breathes, and they nod slowly. “I… is that my name?”

“Dood is just fine, I think,” Sparrow smiles, and he offers his hand slowly, the way he would with Hero when she was younger and unwilling to budge on one topic or another. “I know Normal is going to take great care of you, but I want you to know you can rely on me too, okay?”

He doesn’t know where this came from, except he does, because he just watched his son be held at gunpoint and reflected in Dood’s personage is the person that Sparrow turned away from in favor of what Lark wanted, of what the world needed, and where had it gotten them? His daughter hates him, and his son isn’t far behind. His father withers away and his mother is tired, so tired, and Sparrow has spent a lifetime loving and choosing his brother and it still hadn’t saved him, had it? He can’t force Lark to love himself, no matter how hard he tries, so shouldn’t he choose himself for once?

Dood didn’t deserve this, and they clearly don’t remember much of what Sparrow had once resented them for. Forgiveness is one of the principles of being a lovewolf, isn’t it?

“That… sounds nice?” Dood shifts in place, and Sparrow glances back up just in time to catch Himself looking back, tired and haggard and still so small. “I like Normal.”

Sparrow shifts his gaze. Normal is standing with Scary, gawking at her over… whatever it was she was reading that he’s since tuned out. He’s ditched the mascot suit but still wears the bright blue jersey he’s so fond of, his hair is messy and clearly unwashed, and there’s the smallest wisps of what might be facial hair above his lips, only noticeable when he frowns.

My son. Sparrow smiles. “Me too.”

He doesn’t know what might come next, but he thinks his father might be proud of him for once, and maybe that’s enough. Dood takes his hand, and though the static stings and writhes and whispers, Sparrow can only smile to himself and turn to face a world saved by his son and his friends, and maybe finally find the grace to heal his own inner child in the progress.

#dndads spoilers #kasey writes stuff #dndads #sparrow oak garcia #the doodler #the doodler dndads #dood beloved #i just think. theyre neat #<33333

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ohtobeaspettyasleah · 8 months

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So little life update that’s a-bit unexpected but also super scary.

I’ve always known I’ve had a high resting heart rate. Ever since I started my course to get my certificate III & IV in fitness I’ve always know it’s been higher than average for someone who’s considered to be fit & healthy.

But it never really phased me because I’ve never had any issues. Until yesterday.

I’ve recently started training with a heart rate monitor on. The gym I know work at does a lot of training around heart rate percentages and fitness zones and stuff so I got myself fitted for one and it was insane.

With my height, weight and age my maximum heart rate was calculated to be around 196. (The equation to figure out your max heart rate is 220 minus your age) With that being said, during my cardio workout I was peaking above that. My heart rate was reading well over that and I wasn’t even breaking a sweat.

My resting heart rate when I put the damn think on was already reading that was was at 75% max. So my boss, got me to give it my all on the assault bike for 20 seconds flat to see just how high I could push my max heart rate.

Guys…. My heart rate, going at fast as I could with nothing left in the tank got up to 218. For someone who teaches spin classes, exercises very regularly (minus the last two months but that shouldn’t make a huge difference) is a fucking personal trainer!! It shouldn’t be that high.

So seeing that actually scared me. Something isn’t right because I know I’m an active person. My heart shouldn’t be working that hard. I booked in with my GP yesterday afternoon, he referred me to get bloods drawn yesterday which I did.

He’s testing for thyroid issues & I’m going to be doing a 24hr heart rate monitor test hopefully next Friday. And I gotta say—I’m shit scared, because I’ve always known my hearts always beat a little faster but physically seeing it on the screen get to 218 out of 220 is insane.

To put it into perspective, that’s the equivalent of someone who is sedentary & hasn’t worked out a day in their life doing their first jog. Not someone who teaches high intensity spin classes for a living.

I’m going in to the pathology place today where I got my bloods done yesterday to hopefully book in my 24hr heart rate test. I needed the day of work & for the day’s workout to be a cardio based day so I can mimic the experiences from yesterdays session. So hopefully I can get that sorted.

Blood work should come back by the latest on Monday.

Edit: yesterday when my doctor took my heart rate—my resting rate was 89 beats per minute.

#Leah’s heart rate story #personal updates #personal

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itissadbutitsmy-artblog · 6 months

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This might sound a bit dumb, but I have an AU idea where Pepper Mint somehow manages to retain control of his Pepperminteppi form & escape with Cadebra. Cadebra: "So my friend is now an immortal Primordial being that can use massive amounts of black magic. Nice." The Cult has to deal with their God not wanting anything to them (& also being in Wizard Jail for, y'know, murdering children).

OK HIIIIIIIIIIIIII

absolute delight and excitement and beige comics under the cut let's go insane

first off this is such a fun idea but i kept getting stuck because how did they get out if he didnt get at least a little violent? they were in a Situation. thats why he started blasting in the first place in the movie! he kills everyone holding cadebra and then kills everyone else who is looking at the two of them funny, and he tells her to get out before he starts hurting her too. but anyways i digress. au! my polite little boy uou (transcipts in image descs to save on space. i realize i should be doing this in the first place to be more accessible but i dont do it. ay. someday ill get over that brain hurdle)

the profs are so. blank eyed about being Stopped. that’s their GOD. they want him to do the prophesied deeds! but he’s not. “aren’t you our god now” no I’m just that kid but I have this primordial god deity chilling giving me horrible advice now in my head. awful. thanks. i just learned real fast real hard how to love and trust myself

and then also i was like. well like. w. what is everyone gonna say. not nice things. thats a scary insect boy (WHY HE INSECT? IVE NEVER DRAWN PEPPERMINTEPPI PROPERLY BEFORE AND ITS KILLING ME WHY IS HE A BEETLLEEEEE).

and also also. also. ???? drinking the ichor SUCCESSFULLY, is quite literally what og peps just,, keeps saying will Recreate Him, OG Peps, so i guess he did that (?? HELLO) or something similar when he was little but as you can tell he did not uh. keep the scary beetle body. maybe he didnt have a bestie to protect

anyways. so. pep likes being big. :)

also have this

poor pep trying to mediate between the gay idiot he used to be in his head (not the gay idiot he still is) and the giant scary monster from the before-nothingtimes he just willingly added to the vr chat

and his poor fuckin teachers

(ron james is too old and anxious for this shit and life giving magus has a thing about not letting people feel sad :( hes an Emotions Wizard being sad makes him do Evil Magic did you watch the episode Little Dude? gotta keep his students feeling loved and safe or else. especially when they’re um. imbued with massive amounts of dark magic. sorry I like the them)

i also have this from discord

I don’t know how to end this post this au is fun. none of the kids and few of the adults know the significance of this guy. pep is like hnnnnn just wanna be a normal kid but also scarypowerfulbig. enough. to protect. blaines over here like we are not letting him in the school like that are we and weaponhead is like well. the important thing is we aren’t letting the murderers back in. Blaine.

Maybe larry (cousin got fucking murdered by the teachers) and pep (reached level 100,000 just by drinking juice and now kinda scares everyone) drop out together. just chill quiet together. what do wizards even DOOOOOO, get COFFEE??? make up entirely new schools of magic kinda like those jerky secret societies but less jerky (ron James s6e13 “thanks for the crabapples giussepe”)????? just sit around and wait for Blaine (RULES GUY) and Deb (needs structure in her life and thinks school is fun) to get out of class so they can go do things?

also also I was gonna be Sad tm that you said pep was immortal now, but I insist on believing that wizards have long lifespans. so it’s not like Deb and blaine and larry just fucking DIE ten seconds into pep’s infinite life. they’re there. for a while. (:

#i turned into a swirling vortex of delight and wizards over this #adventure time #distant lands #au #asks #traditional #zoomerinaboomercostume #I don’t wanna tag everyone wehhhh #i do need to draw the evil teachers 🔘_🔘 I just love rj and life giving magus so much #brb making Ron James Drinking into my avatar #what do we call him. pepi 🥺

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rotaryprism · 1 year

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magic misfits incorrect quotes

Izzy: I thought you were going to give me a book recommendation or something. Olly: *laughs* Book recommendation? I can’t read!

Leila: Who wants to make fifty bucks? Olly: How? Leila: I need someone to take the fall. Olly: What did you do? Leila: I can't tell you. Yes or no, no questions asked. Ridley, from the other room: Oh my god. Leila: ... Ridley: OH MY GOD! Olly: Make it a hundred. Leila: Deal.

Mr. Vernon: What did you two do? Leila: Carter: Mr. Vernon: You’re not in trouble, I just need to know if I have to lie to the police again or not.

Ridley: You guys worried about Theo? Olly: Totally! Izzy: Yeah, he called me in the middle of the night and just yelled, "what do I do, what do I do, what do I do, what do I do?" Ridley: And what'd you say? Izzy: "I dunno, I dunno, I dunno, I dunno." Olly: Ridley: He’s lucky to have you as a friend.

Olly: DID YOU REALLY THINK THAT JOKE WAS FUNNY? IT WASNT. NOBODY IS LAUGHING. Olly: *pulls up a graph* THIS IS WHEN YOU TOLD YOUR JOKE, YOU HAVE SONGLE HANDEDLY RUINED COMEDY! IVE ALSO ASKED MANY COMEDY SCHOLARS ON THEIR OPINION OF YOUR JOKE AND THIS IS WHAT THEY HAD TO SAY! Izzy: I've been researching comedy for the past 20 years, and I have genuinely never seen a joke this bad. We have used quantum physics to look into alternate universes to see every joke made, and yours was still by far the worst. Olly: CONGRATULATIONS! YOUVE SINGLE HANDEDLY CREATED THE WORST JOKE IN HUMAN HISTORY! HERES A MEDAL! *pulls up a horrible ms paint drawn star that says "you need help*

*The gang is learning CPR on a test dummy* Mr. Vernon: So, assessing the situation. Are they breathing? Izzy: No, Mr. Vernon. They are not breathing. And they have no arms or legs. Mr. Vernon : No, that’s not part of it— Izzy: Where are they? You know what? If we come across somebody with no arms or legs do we bother resuscitating them? I mean, what kind of quality of life do we have there? Olly: I would want to live with no legs. Izzy: How about no arms? No arms or legs is basically how you exist right now, Olly. You don’t do anything. Mr. Vernon : All right, well, lets get back to it. ‘Cause you’re losing him. *Izzy pumps frantically* Okay, too fast. Everyone, we need to pump at a pace of a 100 beats per minute. Izzy: Okay, that’s uh, hard to keep track. How many is that per hour? Theo: How’s that gonna help you? Izzy: I will divide and then count to it. Theo: Right. Mr. Vernon : Okay. Well, a good trick is to pump to the tune of ‘Staying Alive’ by the Bee Gees. Do you know that song? Izzy: Yes, yes I do. I love that song. *clears throat, begins to sing* First I was afraid, I was petrified.

Theo: Oh, fiddlesticks. Izzy: Look, I understand this is a tense situation, but let's watch the fucking language.

*The gang responding to being stabbed by a sword* Theo: Rude. Carter: That's fair. Ridley: Not again. Leila: Are you gonna want this back or can I keep it?

Ridley: But seriously, what is the real plan here that has to do with not fucking around? Olly: There is no plan that does not involve fucking around. But we will make sure all of our fucking around will be applied in a constructive direction.

Leila: Why don't humans have a specific noise that means "there are bees here, let's leave immediately." Why are elephants more advanced than us. Ridley: We do have a specific noise for it. It sounds like this: Ridley: "There are bees here, let's leave immediately."

Carter: I'm against crime, and I'm not ashamed to admit it.

Leila: Dad said its my turn with the brain cell. Carter: Square up.

Leila: WHY DID YOU KILL HIM?! HE COULD HAVE HAD HOPES AND DREAMS, HE COULD HAVE HAD A FAMILY!!! Carter: Leila- Carter: It- it was just an ant-

Olly: I wasn't hurt that badly. The doctor said all my bleeding was internal, that's where the blood's supposed to be!

Ridley: What’s your favorite color? Olly: Stop asking stupid questions. Ask me something logical and mature. Ridley: How many moles of sodium bicarbonate are needed to neutralize 0.8ml of sulfuric acid at STP? Olly: My favorite color is pink.

#the magic misfits #incorrect quotes

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chococookiez · 1 year

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I FUCKING MISSED 4/13 I COMPLETELY FORGOR BUT IM POSTING ANYWAY

i was holding off on posting it until i had more content but i did a fantroll :]

some other art/shitposts i did with it (+ my other ocs)

and here's bonus ooc shitty doodles i did for my dying tiktok account

i haven't properly drawn anyone other than aradia and sollux (and eridan partially but i've only done march eridans for some reason) and the one with all of them was . the first time i drew any of them other than eridan please forgive me

words under the cut. i must ramble

so . homestuck huh

how did i spend my first 4/13 you ask? got up at 5am to fuck around with my (slightly drunk) friend on vrc until we got tired, had various revelations, a whole crisis that i do not wish to unpack... im forgetting something

oh yea

dumb of ass moment: i played that one fucking solkat vn literally just for the hell of it

I haven't read the comic yet BECAUSE im planning to binge read the entire fucking thing over the summer with my friends and i am fucking HYPED i have the unofficial collection downloaded on my pc already in preparation and we're planning on doing a massive party once we're done we are going to have a fucking ball with this . technically i've only been properly interested in homestuck since february which i find really funny cause my brain made the switch so fast it gave me fucking whiplash. i've literally never had an interest hit me THIS HARD in my life especially with how little canon content i have to work with currently since im saving it all for the summer (the restraint is so hard y'all have no idea)

highlights of shit i've done to do with homestuck other than art so far:

made 2 extended zodiac pins out of pre-existing pins i had, one for myself and one for my irl friend

said irl friend had to suffer through a 2+ hour long infodump where i just showed them all the main characters i had knowledge about (beta/alpha kids/trolls, ancestors and cherubs), did a hussie and had The Quadrant Ramble™, shittily explained classes and aspects and tried my best to explain The Weird Time Bullshit™ (it was very fun for me . he also said it was fun but i have my doubts)

speaking of quadrants i've made 4 quadrant keychains (erisol spade, cronkri heart, meowrails + kurtuna diamonds) (currently only displaying 3 of them since the meowrails one fucking SELF DESTRUCTED as in the paint fucking peeled itself off and ive been too lazy to remake it rn) and i've been slightly tempted to add a solkat one but i have no clue what quad i'd put them in tbh and that's the only thing stopping me (oh and a meuloz heart . just because)

very very vaguely hinted at this once before but i made a shitty character playlist. not linking it or saying who it is. y'all can just guess

i made... an eridan osu skin. out of one i had already that i liked. and i've been tempted to make a sollux one. did you know im mentally ill (something did spark this: i had a map of eridan's theme that had a skin on it, so decided to make a full one out of it to fuck with my friend who likes him)

im planning on cosplaying A Troll but have no sodding clue which one. my internal options rn are kanaya, vantases (have their outfits/something like them on hand already, plus vantases have easy horns), leijons (associate myself with them a lot (one of my favourite vrc avatars to use rn is a meulin edit even), especially considering im a leo myself), eridan, aradia and feferi (they'd be hilariously fitting for reasons i wish to not explain, especially eridan)

am probably gonna land myself with a pile of homestuck merch, either from birthday gifts or my own stupidity

so yea, just a few words. i couldn't fight the homestuck

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bd2187-blog · 1 year

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Saga Chapter 1

2/11/23

I began reading Saga a few months after the first issue was released back in 2012. I was a sophomore at CSUN who just started reading comics. Thankfully, I stumbled upon the story of Saga, a sci-fi series written by Brian K Vaughan and illustrated by Fiona Staples. Fast forward 13 years later, I find myself returning to Saga for a fourth time. This time I’d like to document my thoughts, hence this review.

Chapter 1 introduces star-crossed lovers, Alana and Marko. The story is narrated by their daughter, Hazel, who tells the story from some point in the future. Vaughan creates a galaxy with humane themes that revolve around family and war. The first few pages introduces our main characters through the birth of Hazel. In this chapter, amongst the realistic and humorous depiction of childbirth and marriage, Vaughan takes the time to establish the galaxy they live in through brilliant world building.

It’s a time of war between the planet Landfall and its moon Wreath. Alana, a descendant of Landfall, was once a prison guard to Marko, who’s from Wreath. We learn that Alana saves Marko’s life and marries him. This news doesn’t bode well with many factions from both sides of the war. This results in the hiring of a Freelancer (aka bounty hunter), The Will, and the order of a humanoid prince with a television as his head, Prince Robot IV, to eliminate both Alana and Marko because their love is a sign of peace. The Will is hired by a Wreath native named Vez while Prince Robot IV is ordered by his father, His Highness of the Robot Kingdom.

As the names and depictions of these characters may seem silly, Vaughan manages to write one of the most engaging books I’ve ever read. The dialogue between characters are raw and many times humorous. The first words we read are from Alana while she gives birth to Hazel. As she’s in labor, she yells at Marko, “Am I shitting? It feels like I’m shitting!” Marko, maintaining a calm demeanor, later says, “ You have never been as beautiful as you are right now.” Alana replies in pain, “Right, because nothing’s more lovely than a fat woman spread-eagle in the back of an old body shop. It’s like something out of a fairy tale or... AHHN HOLY FUCK!” There’s never a dull moment with Vaughan’s writing.

In addition, Fiona Staples depicts these weird, often bizarre creatures, in a painterly style which would be hard to depict in a television show. (Fun fact, Vaughan intentionally created weird-looking characters and settings to avoid any television adaptations). Staples does a great job expressing raw facial emotions which makes the characters even more relatable (see page 1 book 1). She has a great use of color which sets the mood for different scenes. One scene which stood out was a page spread which shows Alana and Marko watching over a battle take place on the broken Uncanny Bridge while on the way to the Rocketship Forest. The scene has Alana and Marko faced away from the audience in the foreground with the battle taking place in the mid-ground. The blue of the night sky and the orange of the flames fill up the pages-- creating a beautiful yet chaotic scene (see page 44 book 1).

Staples also distinguishes character’s through their dialogue’s lettering. Hazel’s first person narration is hand-written while Prince Robot IV’s words are typed in roboto font.

Although I’ve revisited this story a handful of times, it never ceases to amaze me how Saga is so well-written and well-drawn. People often compare this story to Game of Thrones, Star Wars, and Rome and Juliet. Saga sets itself apart by creating characters that are charming, weird and relatable. Vaughan tells a story about a family trying to survive while they live in a never-ending war which originates from racism and class division. I’m excited to re-read the series while reading new issues as Vaughan and Staples continue to release new chapters each month.

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mariorsomething · 2 years

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pov you are an eye avatar and you have adhd (based on this post: https://mariorsomething.tumblr.com/post/679194077960503296/juice-ham-cheese-ham-cracker-cheese-cracker )

#tma #the magnus archives #tma fanart #jonathan sims #the archivist #fanart #2022 #myart #ive never dropped everything and drawn something so fast in my life #can an archivist not just eat his lunchable in peace!!!

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meruz · 3 years

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once again i am answering asks in a big compilation post. included is... gotham, patrick stump, tips about drawing backgrounds, tips about drawing in general, links to my faq, and infinity train

like.... the tv series? No... I’ve drawn dc comics fanart before, though. But it’s been years since I’ve been really into it. I like jumped ship like 10 years ago when the New 52 happened LOL.

AFJHDSLKGH I’m sorry I (probably) won’t do it again??

Actually full disclosure I have a truly cringe amount of p stump drawings/photo studies in my sketchbook right now LOL. He’s just fun to draw... hats, glasses, guitar, a good shape... but I don’t think I’ll rly post those until I can hide them in another big sketchbook pdf.. probably Jan 2022. Stay tuned........ (ominous)

(ominous preview)

These are all sort of related to backgrounds/painting so I grouped them together even though they’re pretty much entirely separate questions.... ANYWAYS

a) How is it working as a BG artist? Is it hard? What show are you drawing for?

I think you’re the first person to ever ask me about my job! Being a background artist is great. It’s definitely labor intensive but I think that could describe pretty much any art job (If something were rote or easy to automate, you wouldn’t hire an artist to do it) and I hesitate to say whether its harder or easier than any other role in the animation pipeline. Plus, so much of what truly makes a job difficult varies from one production to the next, schedule, working environment, co-workers etc. But I will say that I think while BGs are generally a lot of work on the upfront, I think they’re subject to less scrutiny/revisions than something like character/props/effects design and you don’t have to pitch them to a room like boards. So I guess it’s good if you don’t like to talk to people? LOL

A lot of my previous projects + the show I’ve worked on the longest aren’t public yet so I can’t talk about em (but I assure you if/when the news does break I won’t shut up about it). But I’m currently working on Archer Season 12 LOL. I’m like 90% sure I’m allowed to say that.

b) ~~~THANK YOU!! ~~~

c) What exactly do you like to draw most [in a background]?

@kaitomiury Lots of stuff! I really like to draw clutter! Because it’s a great opportunity for environmental storytelling and also you can be kind of messy with it because the sheer mass will supersede any details LOL.

I like to draw clouds... I like to draw grass but not trees lol,,, I like to draw anything that sells perspective really easily like tiled floors and ceilings, shelves, lamp posts on a street etc.

d) Do you have any tips on how to paint (observational)?

god there’s so much to say. painting is really a whole ass discipline like someone can paint their whole life and still discover new things about it. I guess if you’re really just starting out my best advice is that habit is more important than product. especially with traditional plein air painting, I find that the procedure of going outside and setting up your paints is almost harder than the actual painting. There’s a lot of artists who say “I want to do plein air sometime!!” and then never actually get around to doing it. A lot of people just end up working from google streetview or photos on their computer.

But going outside to paint is a really good challenge because it forces you to make and commit to lighting and composition decisions really quickly. And to work through your mistakes instead of against them via undo button.

My last tip is to check out James Gurney’s youtube channel because hes probably the best and most consistent resource on observational painting out there rn. There’s lots other artists doing the same thing (off the top of my head I know a lot of the Warrior Painters group has people regularly posting plein air stuff and lightbox expo had a Jesse Schmidt lecture abt it last year) but Gurney’s probably the most prolific poster and one of the best at explaining the more technical stuff - his books are great too.

e) Do you have tips for drawing cleanly on heavypaint?

@marigoldfool UMM LOL I LIKE ONLY USE THE FILL TOOL so maybe use the fill tool? Fill and rectangle are good for edge control as opposed to the rest of the heavy paint tools which can get sort of muddles. And also I use a stylus so maybe if you’re using your finger, find a stylus that works with your device instead. That’s all I’ve got, frankly I don’t think my drawings are particularly clean lol.

f) Tips on improving backgrounds/scenes making them more dynamic practicing etc?

Ive given some tips about backgrounds/scenes before so I’m not gonna re-tread those but here’s another thing that might be helpful...

I think a good way to approach backgrounds is to think of the specific story or even mood you want to convey with the background first. Thinking “I just need to put something behind this character” is going to lead you to drawing like... a green screen tourist photo backdrop. But if you think “I need this bg to make the characters feel small” or “I need this bg to make the world feel colorful” then it gives you requirements and cues to work off of.

If I know a character needs to feel overwhelmed and small, then I know I need to create environment elements that will cage them in and corner them. If a character needs to feel triumphant/on top of the world then I know I need to let the environment open up around them. etc. If I know my focal point/ where I want to draw attention, I can build the background around that.

Also, backgrounds like figure compositions will have focal points of their own and you can draw attention to it/ the relationship the characters have with the bg element via scale or directionality or color, any number of cues. I think of it almost as a second/third character in a scene.

Not every composition is gonna have something so obvious like this but it helps me to think about these because then the characters feel connected and integrated with the environment.

Some more general art questions

a) Do you have any process/tips to start drawing character/bodies/heads?

I tried to kind of draw something to answer this but honestly this is difficult for me to answer because I don’t think I’m that great at drawing characters LOL. Ok, I think I have two tips.

1) flip your canvas often. A lot about what makes human bodies look correct and believable is symmetry and balance. Even if someone has asymmetrical features, the body will often pull and push in a way to counterbalance it. we often have inherent biases to one side or another like dominant hands dominant eyes etc. you know how right-handed artists will often favor drawing characters facing 45 degrees facing (the artist’s) left? that’s part of it. so viewing your drawing flipped even just to evaluate it helps compensate for that bias and makes you more aware of balance.

2) draw the whole figure often. I feel like a lot of beginner artists (myself included for a long time) defer to just drawing headshots or busts because it’s easier, you dont have to think about posing limbs etc. But drawing a full body allows you to better gauge proportion, perspective, body language, everything that makes a character look believable and grounded.

Like if you (me) have that issue where you draw the head too big and then have to resize it to fit the proportions of the rest of the body, it’s probably because you (I) drew the head first and are treating the body as an afterthought/attachment. Sketching out the whole figure first or even just quick drawing guides for it will help you think of it more holistically. I learned this figure drawing in charcoal at art school LOL.

oh. third mini tip - try to draw people from life often! its the best study. if you can get into a figure drawing/nude drawing class EVEN BETTER and if you have a local college/art space/museum that hosts those for free TREASURE IT AND TAKE ADVANTAGE OF IT, that’s a huge boon that a lot of artists (me again) wish they had. though if youre not so lucky and youre sitting in a park trying to creeper draw people and they keep moving.. don’t let that stop you! that’s good practice because it’s forcing you to work fast to get the important stuff down LOL. its a challenge!

b) I’ve been pretty out of energy and have had no inspiration to draw but I have the desire to. Any advice?

Dude, take a walk or something.... Or a nap? Low energy is going to effect everything else so you gotta hit that problem at its source.

If you’re looking for inspiration though, I’d recommend stuff like watching a movie, reading a book, playing video games etc. Fill up your idea bank with content and then give yourself time/space to gestate it into new concepts. Sometimes looking at other art works but sometimes it can work against you because it’s too close.

Also something that helps me is remembering that art doesn’t always have to be groundbreaking... like it’s okay to make something shitty and stupid that you don’t post online and only show to your friend. That’s all part of the process imo. If you want to hit a home run you gotta warm up first, right? Sports.

I should probably compile everytime i give tips on stuff like this but that’s getting dangerously close to being a social media artist who makes stupid boiled down art tutorials for clout which is the last thing i want to be... the thing I want to stress is that art is a whole visual language and there are widely agreed upon rules and customs but they exist in large part to be broken. Like there's an infinite number of ways to reach an infinite number of solutions and that’s actually what makes it really cool and personal for both the artist and the viewer. So when you make work you like or you find someone else’s work you like, take a step back and ask yourself what about it speaks for you, what about it works for you, what makes it effective, how to recreate that effect and how to break that effect completely, etc. And have a good time with it or else what’s the point.

for the first 2, I direct you to my FAQ

For the last one, I don’t actually believe I’ve ever addressed artwork as insp for stories/rp but I’ll say here and now yeah go ahead! As long as you’re not making profit or taking credit for my work then I’m normally ok with it. Especially anything thats private and purely recreational, that’s generally 100% green light go. I only ask that if you post it anywhere public that you please credit me.

(and I reserve the right to ask you to take it down if I see it and don’t approve of it’s use but I think that case is pretty rare.)

a) @lemuelzero101 Thank you!!! I haven’t played Life is Strange but actually that series’ vis dev artist Edouard Caplain is one of my bigger art inspirations lately so that’s a really high compliment lol. And yeah I hope we get 5-8 too...!

b) Thank you for sticking around! I’ve been thinking about Digimon and Infinity Train in tandem lately, actually. They’re a little similar? Enter a dangerous alternate world and have wacky adventures with monsters/inanimate objects that have weird powers... there’s like weird engineers and mechanisms behind the scenes... also frontier literally starts with them getting on a train. Anyways if anyone else followed me for digimon... maybe you’d like Infinity Train? LOL

c) @king-wens-king I’M GLAD MY ART JUST HAS PINOY VIBES LOL I hope you are having a good day too :^)

a, b, c, d) yessss my Watch Infinity Train agenda is working....

e) aw thank you!! i think you should watch infinity train :)

#ask #trying this new thing where i tag people in the body of the post instead

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jadelynlace · 3 years

Text

Ink Drinker / Modern Vikings AU [Ivar x F!Reader], Chapter 6

catch up here!

synopsis: Ivar was only meant to be a friend with benefits, but he caught feelings for his older brother’s best friend, and co-worker: you.

pairing: Ivar x F!Reader

***content warning [PLEASE READ]: this chapter has the after effect of the trauma call, and too many emotions. surgical mentions and medical terminology are in this chapter as well. anything in italics indicates a flash back.

author’s note: I’m so sorry.

“Floki, why can I be left alone?” Ivar asked.

“Because the last time you were left alone you ended up with fifty thousand milligrams of pain killers in your stomach. Now, come here—do you know this?” Floki replied with his fingers taping the photo copied image.

“I drew that.” Ivar said back.

“Yes, you did. Where do you want it?”

“What do you mean?”

“You hate your body so much why don’t you cover it in something you like?”

It is sixteen hours that Ivar is in surgery. His world is dark, nothing but, with pierces of noises that he can recall. But trying to decipher them only makes the surroundings dull, caked in black and muffled with a buzz of an unruly bee hive. There are pokes of pain, he remembers the green light, and he remembers the pot hole he swerved to miss. He doesn’t remember how fast he was driving and the second he was over the yellow line made no difference for the sudden beast of a truck to find him.

Everything below Ivar’s powdered knee caps are reattached. Grueling hours on the table while he’s sewed back together like a monster. Enough time for Hvitserk to get clothes, to get you clothes, to pack a bag for his brother per your request. Even in the presence of clean laundry you can’t take your blues off yet—they’re holding you proper because you just saw Ivar that morning. You two made love in the low morning light, filled with ecstasy, his seed and then he made you eggs with extra hot sauce and hugged you tightly you were sure you stopped breathing. He told you to be safe, baby, like he did at the dawn of each shift and that he would call you when his last appointment was finished, and on his way back from shopping for supplies for the parlor and that you two would make lunch plans. In his speed, his haste to make sure he didn’t miss you before the two tone song of death would sing in the radios, he instead, became the reason it did.

Your chief shows up when you tell him the nature of the emergency. Pulling additional personnel on for overtime and they take the rig out of service and from your hands. Words don’t spare any differences and although he offers you a hug, when you take it he slips you a piece of paper.

“Remember the job you’re doing. And the change you’re making.” He whispers in your ear and you look at the folded sheet. It’s a photocopy of a poorly drawn fire truck with an even worse sketched stick figure, and you had scribbled it when you were five. Back when you met chief for the first time because now you hold the same badge number your father once did.

“If I give you your Dad’s old badge number, are you going to act like a jack ass like him?”

“I can’t make any promises chief.”

“I have a partner in mind for you, you’ll like him. He’s a good kid. A good medic.”

“This good kid got a name?”

“Yeah, Hvitserk. I’ll introduce the two of you.”

This is the call that shapes you as a medic, as a provider, and changes how you see things. This is the call that sends a new person out into the street, whether Ivar lives or not. This is the call that forever holds terror in your heart because he was laying in the back of your ambulance, and that was the one spot you never wanted him to occupy.

Aslaug walks through the doors and she’s already two tissues deep into a soggy mess. Hugging Hvitserk and hugging you and you wish you were meeting this woman for the first time under any other circumstance. Floki thanks you and you don’t quite know why, even though the words fall heavily and un-calming, he still thanks you. And when the surgeon returns before the four of you, you’re the only one that doesn’t stand. But he calls your name because you know him, he was lab staff that tested you for your certifications and he told you that you’ll make a damn good medic one day.

“Remember what I said on the day of your exam?” He asks and you nod, puzzled and impatient looks on the other faces. “You are a damn good medic—you both are.” He adds, eyes jumping from yours to your partners. “And it shows on this call, of all of them.” Hvitserk’s shoulder nudges you and you only nudge him back, perhaps little too hard in your delirious state. “Essentially what we did, was replant the lower portion of each leg. Now, given the extent of his injuries and how his body handles such, I don’t have a clear cut answer for you on his overall mobility. He may need to have screws implanted, he may need prosthetics. He’s going to be in the ICU for the next 48 hours for constant monitoring. We’ll have him sedated so his body can focus on what’s at stake. He’ll need physical therapy for a long time, and he’ll likely be disabled for the rest of his life, given again, how his body handles this. It’ll be a long road. But, like I said—you two are damn good medics and that is the one reason his legs were able to be saved. I will let you know when he’s moved to the ICU.”

You look back at your partner and his face is as blank as yours; influx of emotions just ready to dive from the void but your minds are still churning, still processing all of what boomed from the doctor’s mouth. Ivar’s chance at returning to a normal life was resting in your hands and you two gave the best damn efforts and they worked. The countless hours of dissection, wondering if you’re cut out for this career, these responsibilities, hours of trauma and blood and vomit all fizzle away because you now know that you are. And it just took Ivar to prove it.

When your eyes open again there’s a sharp pierce in your temple, scrunching eyes together and slowly moving, your head rises from Floki’s shoulder and the lights in the ICU have dimmed in the late hour. Impressions stood between his nostrils, falling like petals over his cheekbones, bleeding through split brows and pink flowers through the depths of his neck. His chest sinking and fainting with time, there was a moment of deafening silence when you are looking at his body; seemingly so small under the contraptions. The depths of earth, and the worst hell was seeing him lay on this cot. He’s only sedated now, even though Ivar looked of death, he was still alive under the harvest of wires. The words of how “we’re doing all that we can” do not bring any more comfort, they just take Ivar like a wave rapidly back out to sea. And now you understand how your patients, and their families feel when you speak the same phrases to them. The clinical assessments do not stop a rigorous schedule, motoring for the possible failure. The room is kept warm, and every so often when you will yourself to peek in, you can see the sheen of sweat that’s over Ivar’s forehead, dancing across his chest under the stickers, the monitors. The capillary refill on his toes show promise, and when the nurse says that to her doctor, you find yourself attempting the same motions on your thumb nail. Pressing the pink away and making room for the white, and then in a quick release, the pink swarms back. The ultra sound machines reminds you of the new equipment in your rig as it assess arterial blood flow every hour.

IV bags drip, slow and agonize and the change of wrappings, dressings and cleaning of both the limbs and Ivar himself collect. You spend hours watching the fluid levels sink, his eyes flutter, his fingers in his hand dance and you grow cold because you just want to hold him. To lock him in a steel tower and to constantly remind him how strong he is, because you know the longest road will not come from learning to walk. It will come from Ivar trying to find that he is worthy to live on.

Blackness had retired across your cheeks, wrapping a veil of makeup that melted into battle scars and you could not move if your body depended on it. Aslaug sits next to you; she takes her time wiping the makeup off from under your eyes, the soiled mascara and she’s humming to you. She had been telling you how when Ivar was young, she would sing to him and it would calm him down. How she sang to him in the hospital after he tried to overdose, tubes pumping his stomach as she blamed herself for such wrong doing. How Hvitserk blamed himself because he gave no one a warning cry. And how she’s singing to Ivar now, even though he can’t hear it, because it comforts the three of you as a whole.

When your eyes follow the nurse into the room, you can hear her say something to Ivar and you watch his head turn in confusion. Grogginess and a fog on his brain as she talks to him like it’s a normal conversation; wishing him a good morning, how the weather looks promising for a beautiful day and you wish you had that level of bed side manner. You never get the promising parts of the journey; you get the patients that are coding and in a rush to the life saving team in the hospital. You love the ones who tell you their entire live’s story in the back of the rig on the way to the emergency room, sharing details and calming your mind with how simple, and yet how different every walk of life is. The nurse says something about you, about Hvitserk and Aslaug and Floki, out and waiting and ready to see him when he’s fit. You wave through the glass and there’s the tease of a smirk on Ivar’s face, even in his slightly sedated state. A dastardly, bastard smirk and his hand lifts off the bed slightly, wiggling his fingers back to you. The tears start up again, pounding a sledge hammer through your skull after all of the unruly pressure and messes of crying as your body tries to go numb.

“Where’s my mom?” You hear Ivar say in a voice that muted slightly as the nurse stands in the door way to exit. “Can I see my mom?” And the nurse nods. Aslaug stands and kisses your hair line as she walks into the vicinity, Ivar watching her and you need to back up, you need to walk away from the room, this hall way and this battle. A faint wheeze goes through your chest and Floki catches it first before Hvitserk has a chance to lift his head and open his eyes.

“Let’s walk, dear,” Floki says and his voice is not authoritative but it still demands you to comply as he loops an arm around your shoulder. “Walking can help to clear the mind.” It’s your first time outside in almost three days, and the sunlight burns you like you had been its victim on a sand covered shoreline for one too many hours. The hospital grounds are manicured, they’re neat and arranged with an abundance of flowers and colors in the open air but everything to you still feels so dull and lifeless, pointless and hopeless and walking only churns your thoughts to double, triple in size like a snow ball rolling down a hill.

You’re finally allowed in to see Ivar and you approach slowly, like touching him will seer you suddenly, stain you with a unremovable pattern and you’ll forever be reminded. His blue eyes are dull and groggy when they open, the nasal cannula wrapping his face and your eyes dance over the scurf collecting on his jaw, and the faint bruising, cuts and scrapes on his skin.

“Hey baby,” His voice rasps and you kneel by the bed, tears already on their journeys to streak your tried skin and Ivar’s needle poked, IV covered arm comes to wipe what he can reach. “You were there, weren’t you?” And you can only nod, eyes still damp and you relish in the touch he gives you only if it’s for a second. “You saved my life, baby,” Ivar finally adds and that makes the whimper start again, the choke of a sob in your throat and he tries to quiet you, slithering a quick noise from his lips and you rest your head against the bed, his hand still on your hair.

“I drove the ambulance over a hundred miles an hour,” You finally say and they’re the first words you can use to process the trauma you two had lived through together.

“That’s my girl,” Ivar smiles, speaking with a voice that sounds like sandpaper.

“I love you Ivar—no matter what happens, I love you so much,”

“I love you too, Y/N,” Ivar says and his voice is weaker now and he needs rest. “Kiss me before you go?” He says with eyes scanning your face, and you can’t deny that now. Pressing your lips softly against his, your hands cupping his cheek and you hope it’s not the last kiss you’ll ever get from him. “I’m not going anywhere, baby,” Ivar tells you. “I’m afraid. But I’m not going anywhere,” You nod as he speaks, a forehead against his for a second and his hand is still trying to reach on you where he can. This is the man that would pull the tubes and the wires from his chest if he could, if that would make him get closer to you. “You’re stuck with me,” And there’s a faint snicker after his words, weak and drowned out from the normal tone but you’ll take it after not hearing his voice for three days.

“I’m stuck with you,” You say back with a small smile. But it still doesn’t bring enough hope.

Ink Drinker Tags:

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