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#its about the trauma 🤌

hostica-a · 8 months

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𝕾𝖆𝖘𝖔𝖗𝖎 ; Symbolism.

ANON : “ Why does Sasori use Hiruko all the time when hes so ugly ”

That's actually a pretty good question anon ! So my thoughts are like yeah, Sasori is outwardly beautiful and eternally so which I do think there is some kind of element of vanity in but I guess maybe the best way to explain it is overall, Sasori is really the trope of distorted innocence which is a heavy theme surrounding objects like dolls in horror genres bc we relate dolls so heavily to children. Children love dolls and they're often human or animal shaped objects that a child can control / relate to since they're usually made to be representative of or desirable or just comforting to the child in some way: think baby dolls, barbie dolls, rag dolls etc.

Sasori is quite literally the Naruto worlds ultimate answer to the Doll Episode trope which is very common and effective in the horror and fantasy genre.

The dolls are being made to replicate/replace a lost loved one, such as a child, a spouse or a sibling. The dolls are made from human components, dead or otherwise. The dollmaker is obsessed with dolls for some reason, and has taken to preferring them over humans. Maybe even wishing humans were more like dolls. The dolls are possessed by an evil spirit, are Ridiculously Human Robots, or have otherwise become animated/alive and actively malevolent.

The dollmaker or collector will usually be a madman or woman who has taken a shine to the protagonists either as "something" to add to their collection, potential parts for their latest creation, or threats to themselves and their beloved collection, making them try to capture or kill them.

Sasori is literally every one of these elements combined and further he comes from the perspective of not just a disturbed adult but most strongly from the psyche of an extremely damaged child which is emphasized by the fact we do not see Sasori’s “ true self ” as a grown man. Hes forever in the body of a young boy. Trauma in children manifests itself in various different ways just like trauma in adults but sometimes traumatized children become very reliant on objects or tv shows, characters, etc for comfort and emotional support.

Things that aren't people, usually bc they've found people to be unreliable or a source of abuse/pain and thus they escape into or hide behind these ‘comfort objects’. Though the behavior is normal for very young children, children who never stop this kind of behavior and keep it going well beyond the age deemed appropriate to like certain things / carry around stuffed toys ETC are doing it usually because of trauma. Sometimes this is fine and not a problem for the person at all but sometimes is deeply unhealthy and does pose a problem for the effected person.

PS don’t take anything I say as gospel either ! Im not a professional or anything.

However, in my eyes Sasori is a deeply traumatised child. Puppets were an escape and a happy place for him. Somewhere he felt comfort. He tried to replace his parents with puppets to fill the void they left him with, he tried to make them love him like the real ones did. He took them to bed with him, gave them his pillows to sleep on. He spent a lot of time learning to make their movements lifelike so they could hug and comfort him the way his real parents did, it wasn't exactly the same but it was something he held on to to cope with their sudden departure.

This is all canon. In at least in my headcanon Sasori believed his mother and father puppets did ‘care for him’. He had this idea that there was a part of them in the puppets he made and whether that was true or not this idea was heavily reinforced when Sasori was pushed to become a shinobi, which he didn’t exactly have any objections to given he was only 6 and his mother, father and grandmother were all shinobi so it felt normal and good to be one himself. However, this is a massive fault of the Naruto world, child soldiers are not healthy or normal or good. Sasoris puppet parents, again in my HC, became his weapons. It gave them the illusion of protecting him because they literally were even if Sasori was the one controlling them.

Sasori may of “outgrown” these puppets but he never outgrew the attachment he had to puppets, rather this attachment gradually evolved when puppets became extremely idealised n intertwined with human life. The foundation for it was always there with how Sasori treated his parent puppets as “alive” in ways but the real problem came when Sasori started to relate living people / shinobi to puppets. He began trying to essentially make them one because he believed this was ideal not just because of his own personal trauma but because being a shinobi essentially meant being a weapon / object which human beings were ill suited while puppets were perfect.

Sasori was replacing the weak / unreliable / temporary / breakable with something strong / reliable / permanent / indestructible. Sasori was deeply effected by how much death and dismemberment he witnessed in the people around him, he sought to eliminate this issue. Puppets were his answer to everything. As this progressed he started disliking humanity entirely and clinging to his puppets as a source of shelter / refuge from humanity who swiftly began to judge him despite being the ones who set him on his path. In fact, in ways Sasori was basically ASKED to do what he did and when he did it suddenly everyone was against it. Its something Sasori couldn’t understand or handle. so Sasori went from wanting to breath life into puppets to simply wanting to make humans into puppets out a the deep dislike/distrust/betrayal he felt.

Komushi was Sasori’s first ‘ human puppet ’ but Sasori didn’t view Komushi as his own. He technically made Kumoshi for his mother. Needless to say despite the request its not what Kumoshi’s mother wanted.

There was a lot of pressure on Sasori to “preform” to help his village. To protect its people. Sasori outlived pretty much all shinobi tasked with the same job to the point where he started to believe in some way in the back of his mind that he alone was capable. He began to think if he just turned people into human puppets they couldn’t be beaten or destroyed because he wouldn’t allow such a thing.

Hiruko was Sasori’s first�� real creation for himself. No one asked him to build Hiruko, he didn’t build him to comfort anyone else. Hes kind of the first human puppet Sasori made when he began to do things for himself and not to help his village. In a way, Hiruko is linked to Sasori’s freedom, to Sasori choosing his art and “happiness” over his village’s desire for him to be a slave that follows orders and destroys himself for their betterment. He was done with that.

Essentially, despite Hiruko’s “ugliness” hes Sasori’s favourite toy and Sasori very much treats him the way a child treats a favourite toy. He goes everywhere with Sasori, Sasori relies on him out of comfort. Theres also the secondary element of convenience since he does mask Sasori’s true appearance giving him a disguise and hes literally a suit of armour as well. Sasori’s aware Hiruko is ugly but hes fond of him the way a child might love a teddy bear even if it the bear appears to others as gross and ratty and old and they could probably have a newer, prettier bear its not the looks that are important. Its The sentimental value and thus the comfort it provides.

I also personally view Hiruko as another symbol of that distorted innocence Sasori represents as I mentioned earlier. Sasori’s appearance is that of a young, beautiful, innocent serene looking youth which we know as his true form but rather, I see Hiruko as just as just as representative of the true Sasori, something more symbolic of Sasori’s soul. Something frightening, old, ugly and twisted and violent. They're both sides of the same coin. I think In some way, perhaps subconsciously Sasori relates to Hiruko this way as well.

LASTLY, before I ramble more bc omg I've never shut up a day in my life, Sasori and Hiruko are both representative literally of the scorpion. Sasori more spiritually and Hiruko more psychically. Scorpions are an armored, intimating animal with a venomous sting from their defensive and offensive tails. Scorpions are symbolic with healing, death, rebirth, passion, revenge, mystery.

Scorpions were thought to have the ability to heal just as easily as kill. Scorpions are both seen as evil and demonic as well as pure and angelic. They’re typically feared and also highly sacred. Theyre a symbol of deep emotion yet being an arachnid they’re also thought of as insectiod which simultaneously gives them the impression of being simply unfeeling and machine-like.

The scorpion represents a shy, gentle creature that prefers to keep to itself yet when needed its perfectly bold, magnetic and vicious. I think its really interesting to note how closely fitting Sasori is to the symbolism of scorpions if you look at them in various cultures and mythology and I've tied him very heavily to these concepts because I'm insane like that.

#⊰ ° ‧: ｡* ⚘ 🥀 ━◞ Out Of Character ⊱#⊰ ° ‧: ｡* ⚘ 🥀 ━◞ 𝓗𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖈𝖆𝖓𝖔𝖓𝖘 ↝ Sasori ⊱#⊰ ° ‧: ｡* ⚘ 🥀 ━◞ 𝕱𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖔𝖒 ↝ Naruto ⊱#Sasori headcanons #ppl : ask a normal question #Me totally fucking insane : its about the horror tropes and trauma and the symbolism 🤌

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o-wild-west-wind · 6 months

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okay, here’s my actual thoughtful post: I get why people are upset about the finale…I really do. but I want to mention that there’s a bigger picture to this story that’s missing if you’re zooming too close onto Izzy as a character, and I’m honestly so grateful that the show stuck to the thematic arc it introduced in season 1 because, as per usual, it’s about the themes 🤌 and this show never skimps on the symbolism!!

so here’s the thing: the primary themes are toxic masculinity (& it’s opposite, queer joy); trauma; love as a healing force for the above; and, title alert—DEATH. because it’s so much more than a cool title!

now, Izzy has always represented something metaphorical about all of these points; most directly, he’s always represented masculinity, and s2 has been an arc of toxicity deconstruction. but crucially, he’s also represented all that for Ed, who is the deuteragonist of this show. because—don’t forget—Stede and Ed are the show.

I’ve always doubted myself for feeling this after seeing how fandom saw Izzy as a third romantic figure (which like by all means have a blast in your fanfics I don’t care it’s about joy at the end of the day and pursue that as you want to), but after hearing something about djenks referring to Izzy as a father figure, it confirms a major point for me—Izzy is also in a lot of ways a parallel to Ed’s dad, and a representation of the trauma and guilt Ed felt from that formative killing. for so long, Izzy was an aggressive shadow in Ed’s life, and a tangible reminder of those daddy issues—someone telling him what to do, keeping him Blackbeard—and the beautiful thing is how that changed this season, how Izzy became a version of masculinity that could love and be beautiful and make good from the hurt, the literal poison into positivity. someone antithetical to his own paternalistic force, healing our daddy issues one drag show at a time. BUT, Izzy is still thematically representative within Ed’s arc—and by also representing the trauma that made Ed “Blackbeard,” it does make smart writing sense as to why Izzy died (NOT saying you can’t be sad about it—stick with me for a moment).

because here’s the thing—as aforementioned, this show is also about DEATH. killing is the root of everyone’s trauma, and reconciling a relationship with death is the ultimate arc Ed and Stede are both on, with the ultimate path of learning to live despite its inevitability. there’s a reason it was such a huge thing that Ed couldn’t personally kill, and then in this episode killed so many people with his bare hands in the name of love—and there’s a reason that was framed as a good thing. and there’s also Ed’s (and arguably Stede’s) active suicidality, which has been a huge force driving this season. these are characters who see death as this all-consuming thing, and they see their own deaths as the only solution. death is the traumatic force driving almost everything about their being for so long—and its reconciliation is everything for them, the greatest sign of growth. so Izzy’s death, and everyone beginning again with love—healing each other with love—is a cap to it all. it’s death as a positive force, for once. it’s death as love, not trauma. it’s death as something that will always happen, but this time not forced by your own hand. it’s a death to everything toxic, to what “Blackbeard” represented, and all the while a sort of rebirth. it’s kind of a death to…death? it’s functionally like the real physical moon replacing the giant romantic imaginary orb: it’s taking the thing that’s been artificially morphed in Stede and Ed’s heads and making it real this time, with all the bittersweet emotions that come with tangible reality.

and honestly, I’m glad that it was tragic and emotional. I didn’t think I’d be so devastated to see Izzy die, but it really did get to me, especially because of everything he said to Ricky and then to Ed. but think of it this way: Izzy and Ed might be romantically compelling because they were toxic and charged (and I hope people still enjoy everything they get from that dynamic in fan work), but imagine if the show had actually gone in that direction—where would it take us thematically? it would kill the thesis; it would be love as chaos and entertainment, but not healing. instead, this show gave us something so much more powerful: a legitimate, fully-fleshed trauma arc.

trauma hurts. Izzy’s death hurts. but that’s okay. that’s great, actually! it means the storytelling was effective—that Izzy’s arc made you feel something. and i know this won’t be every viewer’s experience, but honestly? I’m glad I can have this grieving process in such a beautifully framed light in the safe space ship of this show, because let’s be real—death, real life death, fucks you up. and let me tell you, I could’ve used this show during so many episodes of grief in my life. but here it is now, reminding us that our grief and trauma doesn’t define us—and WHAT a powerful thing for queer love, especially, to be presented as the thing that heals us all. ESPECIALLY when so much grief and death in this community is woven so deeply with the trauma of our identity.

so grieve as you need to, but don’t forget to turn the poison into positivity 💛 because that’s what the show is telling us—choose live, despite!

#djenks out here paying my therapy bill yet again #I feel like I need a million disclaimers for this post so just assume I’ve said all of them #and remember that art that hurts isn’t always a bad thing!#I didn’t think I’d have coherent thoughts yet I swear I blacked out and wrote this here we are #ofmd #ofmd season 2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd spoilers #our flag means death #ofmd meta #tw: death #death #tw: suicide #suicide

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worldofkaeos · 6 months

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one random deep thought lead to another, and im just thinking of what each character in lockwood and co taught us:

Lockwood: grief is an ongoing process; it never ends, but it can get better if you dare to face it, to open up, and to ask for help. even if on the surface, a person looks sprightly and confident, that person may be broken inside. and it kinda makes me think about the people around me, that they may be hurting inside even if they seem like they don't, and we should be kind to everyone around us, because we dont know what theyre going through.

Lucy: feisty is normal for a teenage girl. if you want to do something, just get down to it. dont wait for others to reach out to you; you should take charge of your own life. if you feel something about a situation, never let anyone get you down.

George: never judge a book by its cover. listen to the logical side, even when the world seems like a raging storm (and your emotions are threatening to overwhelm you)

Flo: trauma is hard. but never give up. (shes so badass 🤌)

Holly: sometimes you have to put up with bitches (lucy), just know that they probably have a lot of things going through their heads, and they just arent matured yet. they will know later, and they'll regret their actions. also misunderstandings happen all the time and ughhh it sucks

Skull: no one is truly evil. good can come from the most unexpected places. (also, be funny. it makes life more livable)

Quill Kipps: I cant believe I didnt add him in: LOOK AT HIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. He's certainly gone through a lot — losing ppl in his life, losing himself. At some point in time I hc that he abused alcohol. He's a depressed boy who's lost so much and has no one around him left. Then he's faith is renewed again when he joined lw and co, you can see this through his excitement over the pair of goggles and also people who care about him again — it's almost like he's been granted a new chance at life. So, lesson? No matter your situation, it is okay to experience ups and downs. Sometimes your downs are so low, but don't ever lose faith. It's okay to lose yourself, it's okay to grief, but know that there's always some hope left if you look out for opportunities instead of lying in the shadows.

#lockwood and co #anthony lockwood #lucy carlyle #george cubbins #george karim #quill kipps #holly munro #flo bones #skull in a jar #l&co #lockwood & co #deep thoughts #i overthink everything

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vinelark · 4 months

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do you have any whumpy fic recs (ideally romance, but gen would do in a pinch)? Open to any fandoms. I feel like I used to see them a lot more, but they are harder to find these days. Bbts really hits the spot tho btw haha.

ANY fandoms? oh boy do i.

Hotel Heart by Laughsalot3412 (and its sequel Safe as Houses): not quite romance but not NOT romance ot3 leverage psychics au where eliot is a hitman who used to be under the control of a horrible empath who left him with major mental scars and huge trust issues. he reluctantly ends up protecting another empath (hardison) and thief (parker) and sloooowly starts to work through the aforementioned trauma while they take down the aforementioned evil empath together. excellent series with excellent pangy plot. also i knew nothing about leverage when i first read it and it’s what got me to watch the show.

Hold my Eyes to the Sky by myrmidryad: an enjoltaire/les mis longfic set in a 1970s(?) wizarding au in which grantaire is a very sad and lonely werewolf and the idealistic activist he’s hopelessly in love with just got himself turned as well, and grantaire has to help him navigate the changes while dealing with his own self-worth issues and tragic backstory. you want whump? look no further.

Occultation by Geese_in_flight & pineapplesquid: a novel-length au of the book Winter’s Orbit, in which the main difference is that kiem, not jainan, is the one dealing with a previous, horrible arranged marriage. somehow this simple switch brings so much fresh potential to the characters (i loved seeing how this played into kiem’s self-worth issues, and also loved this exploration of what jainan’s character would be like if he had been able to flourish the last few years), with a whole new set of pangs. i recommend both the book and the fic!

爱不释手; never let me go by yiqie: a post-cql wangxian getting together fic with the classic amounts of yiqie pain & pining & h/c & devastatingly beautiful writing about the devastatingly beautiful experience of being in love. also blood. honestly most fics by yiqie probably fulfill this request (are you into vashwood, perhaps?)

Morning, keep the streets empty for me by feyburner: a wangxian modern au oneshot with self-sacrificing wei ying getting into trouble and landing himself in the hospital while pining very very hard for his cultivation partner. i’m reccing this one out of all feyburner fics because it has the obvious physical hurt but fey is so good at weaving pangs into fic that tbh there’s emotional whump to be found in most of them. also, god-tier writing in general.

the kite string and the anchor rope by fleurdeliser: a wangxian canon-divergence au that falls into the sickfic whump subgenre. the pangs! wangxian’s love for each other and for a-yuan and the way wwx’s desperation and powerlessness in the face of a sick child (and his own illness) clash with how the world perceives him at the time is so 🤌🤌. this is saved in my h/c favs folder for a reason.

The Long Way Home by itsnatalie: extremely whumpy batfam tim & jason fic, which i’ve definitely rec’d here before but if i’m reccing whumpy longfics it HAS to be on the list. good god this fic is a masterpiece, both for the angst and for the absolute beautiful worldbuilding/navigation of its horror tropes.

and since you like bbts, i’ll also self-rec a few of my older fics! i think you’d probably enjoy this river runs to you, a wangxian/mdzs modern cultivation longfic feat. (sort of) identity shenanigans, angsty backstories, self-worth issues, and the main character getting all manner of hurt. also: you’re the trouble that i always find, a wenzhou/shl dreamsharing/amnesia/sort-of-timeloop fic in which the main character is supposed to dream about killing his love interest but said love interest keeps dreamcrashing to change the plot.

this reclist could’ve been dozens of fics long tbh. i live for The Pangs which usually go hand in hand with good whump, and seek those fics out whenever possible, so as always this is a super incomplete reclist! also i welcome any and all recs in return.

#fic rec #asks #a buffet table of fandoms #i KNOW i’m forgetting like 75% of my favs here #my organization system exists in my heart #anyway these span years and years of reading and i will probably come back to add to this post #the whump in wangxian fandom alone could power a small city for a week #also i wish i could manifest the 500 incredible pangy fics my friends and i have brainstormed in the DMs because whew. the angst #i forget they don’t exist outside of our brains because they’re part of my own mental canon

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findingnemosworld · 7 months

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Hey Nemo,

It was about a young 17 year old Rockstar who was abused and hurt to a very extreme point. She was adopted by a foster family when she was 4 years old. Her foster father who was her main abuser, was also her manager.

The story starts when she gets out of a restaurant with her father and paparazzi storms them. She gets separated from her team and ends up sneakily leaving through the crowds. She becomes missing overnight. There were very excruciating rumors about her that say that she had a Casanova character and slept round. Her manager gave her the image of a sl*t.

3 years passed and now she is dead to the spotlight. Loyal fans only remember her. But, she was hard to recognize. She is a University of Madrid student in Public Health now. Nobody knows where she came from. They know she is from Sevilla. She is a madrista.

Comes in contact with the Real Madrid team where she is a part of Medical team. She becomes friends with them. She is jolly and kind. never had a bf. Joined the team during 2010.

Sergio and her have been really close for a year. He sees her as the kindest soul and pure at heart. He couldn't help but fall in love with her. She did give him a chance.

However, one day through his brother, he comes to know about her past. He asks her about everything but she didn't have it in her to tell the truth. Her trauma got the best of her and she had to see him walk away.

I see Sergio as the type who is unsure but still protects her dignity. He walked out but never stopped caring. She tells him eventually. He takes his time to understand her again, way before she could open up. In 2013, she finally tells him and he swears to protect her no matter what.

It's long but its out.

#the anon who has weird dreams 😅

anon .... 😳 I mean damn, this is .... damn.

in all honesty the plot is so intricate that I might need to reread it over and over again to fully grasp it, I love the complexity though and tbh, I think this can be a fun challenge to tackle when time is on my side, the push and pull, feelings that are just ... 🤌🏻

thank you for sending me this, I will be sure to circle back to it when I am free 😅

#anon asks #sergio ramos

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thelikesoffinn · 4 months

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Hey friend❤️

I got to start off by saying that, I've been loving your writing and your perspectives on different aspects of the game and mixing your personal experience and expertise into your statement. It's just 🤌 amazing and a great night time read

There has been a quote that been dancing in my mind for a while, when ascended Astarion stated to the Tav later after their break-up "You will regret leaving me, more than anything you live to regret". And how Neil delivered that line... its all i can think about. There was so much bitterness, contempt, and melancholy in his voice 😭

I feel that after he sought out his revenge on Cazador and reached ascension, he realized that still feels/remembers his past, still remains deeply insecure and that internally, not much about he as changed, but during that conversation with Tav, he doubled down on how his has more powers, and can call on wolves 🐺 just like a scornful Ex stating that they are doing fine (or even, much better 👀 ) after the break-up to just make their ex-partner feel just as miserable as them (he may also be projecting 👀, and maybe he regrets ascendening since it mayhave been the cause of the break up of the 1st person he had ever cared about and didnt bring him everything... well, atleast not the stuff that truly mattered to him)

I was wondering what did you think of this line and the conversation surrounding that line🤔

P.S ( I would love to hear you talk about why you hated Astarion's reaction to Tav sleeping with Mizora 😃 )

"A great night-time read". Duck. Lovely. That's basically the highest of compliments, I'm melting! I'm so happy you enjoy it 😭❤️

I know exactly which line you mean! I think that was actually one of the first ascended lines I ever stumbled across.

I love how ambiguous it is, because the timing is the way it is.

It could mean "you will regret leaving me because look at me now! I'M AWESOME!"✨️ *throws glitter*

But the moment he says it is just fantastic, because half a second before he was like "I should've made you a spawn to teach you that I can have everything I want" and then he follows it with "you will regret leaving me" and I love the correlation between those two phrases. They can both stand separate, but they can also stand together and hint at a possible future.

You know, it leaves us wondering a bit. Will we regret this? Or will he make us regret it?

(Personally, I 100% can't see Astarion let Tav go. I just can't, I don't. He already shows obsessive behaviour right now, just after ascension, and that likely won't stop just because Tav's like "Nah, love, thanks tho.". Vampires just aren't that lenient when it comes to things they desire. And, despite being ascended, he still is a true vampire.)

I don't think he regrets ascending, really, mostly based on the fact that I don't think he actually CAN regret anything anymore. I think I mentioned it in another ask, but regret seems to be a difficult emotion for true vampires - and thus our true vampire+ babe - as they can't really process it the way a normal person would and anger overshadows everything. So, at best, I think he'd be angry at Tav for not seeing how grand he is now and how it's "their loss" when they refuse him.

I do agree, however, that his insecurity likely stays. It's just overshadowed by ascension, blanketed and kept hidden in the deepest, darkest place where it won't be reached.

Ascension doesn't completely eradicate the very core of his being, it just twists it into the worst it can be.

Love becomes obsession.

Fear, pain and despair become anger.

Shame and Guilt become blame.

So the very core of who he was is likely still there, suppressed and dulled by what ascension has done to him, and his trauma and the resulting insecurity are a huge part of who Astarion is.

In a way, I can even see it seep into his life later on in a repeated cycle of abuse.

As I said at another time, most of the time those who have been abused don't want to abuse others. They don't want to inflict the same things they've gone through on anyone else - albeit they may become abusive in other ways - and will likely shy away from repeating the same things they've experienced.

But ascended Astarion is probably not part of said "most". It could potentially become a way to...well, to cope with the lasting scars Cazador has left him with. Although "cope" is already putting it very very kindly.

Hurting others the way he was hurt can underline the exact difference on who he was and who he now is. It elevates that feeling of power (and safety) he always craved because look at him now! He's the strong one now and no one will ever hurt him again.

He was just like them. Screeching and flailing, flinching and suffering - a weak, pathetic, disgusting wreck. But look at him now. Who could hurt him now?

No one. Not a single living being holds a candle to what he's become.

He's above everything.

Regarding his boasting I do agree - he probably wants to show them how awesome he is (✨️) so that they regret it, but all he does is prove why leaving him was a good idea.

What I find interesting is that he actually does show a lot of joy and excitement for the powers he will attain and the things he will be able to do. He uses it to boast, but it does seem like real excitement and I can not tell you how interested I am in what happens once he notices that it's not enough.

Once he can turn into mist and command werewolves, what's next? Where will he find his next dose of serotonin? Because I think we can all agree that this won't be enough.

It won't ever be enough.

Astarion will forever be in a state of want, and he'll always be greedy for more and more and more, and one day, this greed will be the reason for his demise.

All in all, that entire conversation is a very well chosen way to show us who he's become after ascension. It's just a few sentences, but god, they can imply so much and carry a surprising amount of weight if one is willing to listen.

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #baldurs gate 3 #baldur's gate #baldurs gate #astarion #bg3 asks #disclaimer: op is forever scarred by strahd so take with a grain of salt #also the mizora thing is next on my list it's basically done I'm just trying to space things out instead of spam posting haha

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nanamis-baker · 8 days

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Tasha Tasha Heyy!

I LOVE the fics you have written so far, especially the smut because they are so mouth-watering. I like how the men you write about are gentle and take consent before doing anything to us. And it's so hot how they treat us like a fuck toy but at the same time, they treat us like their princess too.

Can you tell me what you think about while writing your men? like do you base them off someone or its just how you picture Nanami and Gojo to be?

Also, you mentioned something about Geto fic a while ago and not to rush you, but there hasn't been any update from your side. I hope you are going to release the fic though?

Lots of love to you. I really like your work, I hope you write more! ❣️

Hello to you too!! 💖🌷

Firstly, thank you so muchhhh for this ask this is so sweet?? Like you're gonna make me cry happy tears lmaooo 🥹🥹🤌

I am so glad you liked the fics, especially the smut because it's just difficult to write them - at least for me - and I don't know... it just warms my heart to see people enjoying it, so thank you so much!! 🥰🩷

I think you got the main idea behind my smut right - i try to write something consensual, something that's rough, but at the same time I want to show how much the reader means to these men too, hence the focus on consent and aftercare along with all the loving caress lol.

Coming to your question about how I write them - I think it's a mix of how their personality is shown in the anime and manga and how I see them? Like with Gojo, I think he would be chatty and teasing, as shown in the anime, but at the same time, he is someone thoughtful who genuinely cares about people.

Like him eating with Yuji while he was training him, though there was no need for him to do so, or when he sat on the floor because Megumi was injured, or him just crouching down to Megumi's eye level when he told him "when you die, you die alone" - it's just my perception of it, but his way of showing care is very subtle and is often missed by most people, and that's what I try to implement in my fics too.

Although I have only written one fic about him.

I am writing more fics about Gojo of course, and there I want to explore his character more, so I think I would be able to answer this question better when that fic is released and I know more about his character!

Moving further now- do i base them off someone? No. It's actually quite opposite lmaoo.

I was in this relationship/ situationship last year which left me TRAUMATISED lol because the guy was all about "cOnsEnt is sO ImPorTanT" (it is of course), but then whenever we were intimate and I said "no" he would just force the consent out of me till I agreed, and sometimes the consent was completely absent lol.

So I think that is what I keep in mind while writing smut, like showing consent and willingness from BOTH SIDES.

Plus the above guy (@whereflowerswenttodie and i call him Naoya btw 😂) was terrible in bed, so I just want these men to be godly to heal the damage he left lol.

Now, about the Geto fic. It's in work, it's more than 16k words now and I realised it will be too long to be a one shot, so it will be a series (my first series Woohoo!)

I was supposed to release the first part yesterday but there's a lot going on as my finals are nearing and i have to shift to a different place, but i am positive the first part will be out next week for sure! I am so excited and nervous about it, plus i have some scenes planned out in my head but I am scared to write it because I feel like i won't do them justice 😭😭

But yes- first part will be out next week!

Again, thank you sooo much love. You don't know how much this ask means to me! It's so sweet of you to take time out of your day to write this!

Sending lots of love and positive vibe your way too! 💕💕

I apologise for such a long response and trauma dump lmaoooo, I tend to get carried away🫣

I hope your week goes amazing! 🫶✨

#tasha's ask 💌#tasha got praised 💝#tasha's anon 👥

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ramonag-if · 1 year

Note

this is seriously my favourite game rn BECAUSE of how you delivered the angst with mc's entire family. i was playing it and i was like omg... for me 🫶🏾

personally i HATE salyra as i have mommy issues™️ and her betrayal hits hard, and ahlf breaks my heart whenever i think about how he thought of mc as salyras child and not quite his. mc has a wonderful extended family and my mc is so glad to have met them, but ever since they found out about them has been suspicious of salyra. they always thought the chances of her surviving were low, but for some reason started feeling like perhaps their mother dearest was alive and well and doing what she does best: fighting crime even if it meant abandoning her own family (or in the mcs case it seems, use her family to further her goals). still, they never would have thought she wouldve gone off and had another family. in the middle of a war. after she abandoned mc and her other family members.

and my mc is a irus-mancer so the only person they feel like they can trust (at the current point in the game, where they arent with their family) is him, which is ironic to them because the only reason theyre alive is because their father wanted them to help irus. it seems like everyone in mcs life wants to exploit them somehow. anyway if it isnt obvious my mc is VERY angsty. its the childhood trauma and not being in a loving home 🤌🏾 perfect

anyway this got EXTREMELY LONG IM SO SORRY I JUST REALLY love your game, im sure i didnt get the characters motivations right but i am only a reader and this is just my interpretation... i love your game i appreciate your work youre doing so well 💖

Thank you so much! I'm so honoured that you enjoyed the game and the angst 💖🌼

Ah yes, Salyra has brought out a lot of feelings from players and I'm happy to see that you've felt so strongly about Salyra's reappearance 👀

One of themes of the game, while not outwardly stated is fate and whether everything that has happened to the MC is because of their choices or fate. Who knows, maybe the MC and Irus had to meet 😆

You're free to interpret the characters how you want 💖 This is an IF and while I do have a specific plot in mind, I do know that characters can be viewed quite differently by players so feel free to think what you want about their actions.

#crown of exile #answered asks #princeirus #salyra

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fortpeat · 1 year

Note

Blu here!!! 💙

no no no, there's something here, 'cause I think we're really soul-spirits. First off, blue is also one of my favourite colours, which is one of the reasons why it made me so ridiculously emotional. what got me with your explanation tho, is that Rio is literally an animation showing Brazil as the place where it all happens and I'm Brazilian...................................... like, how? I know you would have no fucking idea but now it's EVEN MORE FITTING, because??????? HI THAT'S ME. jfccccc jfc jfc. oh wow.

ABOUT THEM, yesssssssssssss YES YES, literally the exact same here!! Like, I didn't watch LITA, I just scrolled through gifs of the scenes and I searched up their NCs (because I've been an avid BL watcher for years now, and I've heard so many comments on how they were going above and beyond whatever had been done already) when it was still payurain. They didn't interest me at all to make me want to actually watch the show, y'know? but since the very beginning, I was already so drawn to prapaisky I was counting the days for them!!! and when their arc started, that's when I started watching LITA per se, and not just bits and pieces like with payurain. I love what both Boss and Noeul did, I think their portrayal is very cool as well, but it never caught my attention. PrapaiSky stole my entire heart, but probs because they also hit really close to home somehow (with being a SA survivor, etc etc).

It's so lovely to me because I mirror myself so much in Sky?? his whole personality, the way they show him and how he copes (both badly and healthily, because both are constants while healing!!!) with it. And I'll forever defend Prapai (and Fort, for that matter) on how he pursued Sky, because although he might've triggered him at the beginning, he always tried to watch and understand and most of all CHANGE, to make Sky feel comfortable with him.

I love how FortPeat brought that to life. I love their story. I love everything about it, and I believe they've done it wonderfully. I got genuinely invested in them and I can't wait to see so much more!!!!

ALAS, AT LEAST WE CAN ALWAYS REWATCH THEM AND THEIR SCENES, OVER AND OVER AGAIN, LIKE A BROKEN DISC LKSJANDLJASDJLK MWAH MWAH MWAH.

Hi blu 💙😚😚

WOAHH WOAHHH LOOK AT THAT... THE NAME BLU JUST CAME INTO MY HEAD LIKE A SPARK AND IT JUST FITS YOUR VIBE SO WELL 😚😚 LOOK AT THE COINCIDENCE ITS FATE 🤌🤌

And the reason why I connect with Prapaisky so much is that my personality is a mix of Sky and Prapai. I can be very Sarcastic and Sassy at times but seriously a huge softie here 🙈 and Like Prapai I would burn down the world for the people I love and care about. And I have my fair share of trauma (psychological) and I tend to be closed off with people at first unless and until I start trusting them. ❤️ P. S thank you for sharing your story with me 💙

Peat and Fort are my precious babies I would defend them and Sky and Prapai with my whole life. Prapai is such sla sweetheart. Yes his actions in the beginning were a little questionable but to someone who has no idea about Sky's past he was still the best for Sky. He kept his distance when needed, he waited until Sky was ready, he became everything Sky wanted/needed and more.

REWATCHING THEIR SCENES HAS BECOME A NEW HOBBY OF MINE KFIEIJDEIIB 😂😂 ITS ALL MY BRAIN CAN CONJURE UP NOW.

#love in the air #prapaisky #asks are always appreciated #blu asks

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bundyshoes · 2 years

Note

Passing it on 👀 What are your top ten favorite songs for Bileven and why? 🥰

OOOF GURLLLLL this is really hard lolol

Umm okay i have a lot but if i HAD to narrow it down to 10 it’d be:

STUCKINMYBRAIN by Chase Atlantic

I made my first bileven vid to this song, the lyrics just fully encapsulated what billy went through plus it showcases how similar el and billy are:

“Not long 'til she figures out and moves

Sad song, sad story with a history of abuse, oh, yeah

She gets sentimental like her mum does

I get sentimental when I'm on drugs

We get sentimental 'bout the same stuff”

“Find out if you love me

While I find out how to move

'Cause I'm stuck in my brain again”

“Yeah, not long 'til the blues hit

Not long 'til she figures out I'm useless

Say I'm sorry that I sound like my dad, how sad

But I'm trying to make myself a better person”

Graveyard by Halsey

I just think of El coming to him in the Void and following him into his memories and seeing who he really is, all the way into the core of himself where the worst trauma happened/where he ‘died’ essentially — following him into the graveyard

Running up that Hill by Meg Myers

I had this one and the Placebo version on my playlist for them wayyy before s4 came out bc i KNEW 😂😂 but meg’s version is just so 🤌🤌 SO GOOD

Hungry Eyes by Eric Carmen

Dirty Dancing is pretty much one big ass bileven au — u cannot TELL ME baby doesnt remind u of el (even the dad of hopper lolol) and johnny is literally billy lol, the old ladies taking advantage and mullet and everything 😩😩 but also this line takes me back to the first moment they meet in real life, at heathers, and their eyes meet and CLASH and then they be lookin at each other a loooot after that

Lost Boy by The Midnight

This song is s3 from billys pov. Nuff said

Youth by Daughter

This has me thinking of el’s thoughts post s3/starcourt and thinking/remembering billy

“But I’m forever missing him.”

Moonrider by Wrabel and Jai Wolf

I made a video to it and YOU KNOWWWWW and its just. The lyrics thooo and that 80s vibess

Is it a Sin? by Al Hazan

THE HEATHERS HOUSE SCENE HAD THIS PLAYING WHEN EL MEETS BILLY IN REAL LIFE AND THE IMPLICATIONS OF IT AND EVERYTHING ELSE MAKE ME WANNA SCREAMMMM

Cruel Summer by Taylor Swift

Literally s3 😭😭😭 honestly anything about summer romance reminds me of them but this one in particular :”)))

The Day I Lost You by Stilz

This played over speakers at HHN 29, when they had s2/3 ST for one of the houses and it just SOUNDS like something straight out of the show and it just takes me to starcourt basically 🙃🙃😭😭😭

I literally have so many tho, i have a playlist well over 1k lmaoooo and i WAS gonna post a link here but tumblr wont let me lol

Thank you for the ask!! 💖💖💖

#assortedfruitsnacks212 #asks #bileven #billy x el #billy x eleven #otp: and you were happy

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riewritten · 2 years

Text

20 REKINDLING

DUSK IN THE BRIGHTEST | chapter directory

erwin smith/fem!reader, erwin smith/you, no y/n | slow burn, angst, hurt/comfort, fluff & smut, mutual pining, canon AU, college/univ AU, professor erwin smith, commander erwin smith, non-linear narrative, manga spoilers

Trigger warning: canon-typical violence, graphic description, explicit sexual content, suicidal thoughts, mental health issues, trauma, implied/referenced sexual harassment, implied/referenced abuse, attempted murder, overdosing

Plot: It was always the nightmares, really. Entrapped with walls, human-eating giants, fighting through metal strings and swords – utterly violent, dreary, recurrent. But behind the blurry faces was a man with menacing blue eyes and vivid features; eventually appearing before you as your new reputable professor, Erwin Smith. Since then, the disaster had slipped beyond your subconscious. AO3

art credits to sukiblog! the other versions of this art ft. more aot characters are just 🤌chef’s kiss🤌

"You're being dumb right now, seriously." She called your name, "You're not the one to deny such an opportunity."

"I'm just comfortable in my line of work now." You smiled back in apology despite the utter indifference on the matter at hand and the annoyance boiling up on you for her continuous taunts on it.

"It's because of your brother, right?" When you didn't respond, she clicked her tongue. "Gosh, he's not a baby. Let him live on his own. Do you have a brother complex or something?"

You don't think it's about your brother, though. You had a lot of aspirations as a child, mostly revolving around questions – what's with the silly underground your parents have grown into? How did it, along with such giant walls, exist? Why are so many children, roughly not even in the age of ten, are thrown down the ground? Why is it normal? What can you do to make it better? You knew you'd become passionate in embarking on such a mission to answer these questions but the need to make both ends meet for the both of you stopped you from doing so. In exchange of the joy from those curiosities, you could protect someone in your grasp instead. That's why you grew up blandly.

"I think if I want to have something I'd be willing to bid my brother our separate ways. It's just that I don't have anything in mind, and that promotion apparently didn't pique me as well."

"But tell me, what if he dies? What would be left of you?" Your eyes were shot wide, "You're basically an empty shell as you are. What if he's gone?"

Her voice became an echo, slowly lowering in pitch but then another voice overlapped on it; it was a scream this time around. Cries in low volume turning up, up, and up to its crescendo until it rang your ears painfully. It was when you realized the groans of your dying comrades and her voice saying you're an empty shell piled around each other, making your head throb. As you propelled to scream so you could wash the overwhelming sensations away, you shot your eyes wide instead. You were having a nightmare, again. This was the fourth night in the hideout room both of you settled into. This time, you won by making him sleep on the bed while you guard the door. The agreement was actually exchanging rounds, two hours to sleep, then two hours to guard. But you didn't wake him up and actually slept beside the door along the way.

However, what's alarming was that even after waking up the voice you've encountered in your dream was still speaking. Just outside the door. The realization made your blood run cold.

"So this whole floor was rented by the Survey Corps? For how many days?" She asked.

The other one she's speaking to sounded like the landlady's son, "I'm not sure in particular because my mom's the one who processed it but, do you have any urgent concern, perhaps? I don't think they'll be awake to accommodate a fellow soldier at this hour though."

"Of course not," She laughed, "But we have a matter to talk about later on and I just dropped by to confirm if this was indeed the right place to go." You heard her footsteps clank away along with her voice, "Thanks! I'll be back later."

Fuck. You immediately fixed on your things so it'd be easy to grab in case things got to worse, then tapped lightly on Erwin who was easy to wake up. "Very well, you can lie down here now." He groggily remarked, sat up to fix his composure until you interjected, "I heard someone speaking just outside the door. It's someone from the Interior."

He quickly got into it and nodded, "What time is it?"

"Three in the morning," He shot you a confused look for a while because he lied down precisely at nine o'clock and expected to be woken up by eleven. However, that's not the issue at hand. "They immediately went full on tonight. Despite their deliberate presence around the Survey Corps Headquarters, they never inquired straight on where we were."

You looked down the window to check, tapping on the sill restlessly, "And apparently they're doubled in number. They also didn't rely on the youngsters to do the job for tonight. The one I heard from the door was an old acquaintance." You grabbed your cloak in a rush, "I'll be checking the situation down. The Scouts from the Reiss' farms might be on their way back as well."

Before you twist the knob open, Erwin called your name. "As soon as you meet them, get the report and usher them on a safe route out. Tell them to catch up to the Scouts resting on the HQ and eventually disperse towards Squad Levi to assist." The realization daunted you and he immediately confirmed it as well, "Something bad might've happened in the plan and they might be here to face us straight on as soon as the sun rises."

Panic coiled down your stomach. You knew this would happen and they'd sought Erwin out as soon as their cards lay bare even if he won't be in the headquarters. Still, you never thought it'd be this quick. Along with his command, you also tried to think of a way out somehow.

It's almost five in the morning when you came back. Much stressed and jittery unlike earlier, you banged the door open, "I'm ba–" You froze on the spot then the sight made you realize your mistake. He was quite taken aback as well. "Sorry, too frantic to remember proper conduct of knocking." You gently moved the door close again so Erwin could put his top garment in peace but Erwin quickly chipped in. "No, it's fine. Enter. The situation's dire." So you did, albeit flushed in shame. "And if it's you, the manner's not a new sight to see." He flatly added but this time it was laced with mock.

"Yeah, I suppose." And you gave your updates in lament. He just hummed through it and right after you spoke, he gave you a cup of tea.

"So," You languidly rolled on the cup to mix the fluid in, "This is another one of our tea parties that precedes unfortunate events, huh."

"With the usual pretty ambience of death." He added, sat on the chair and sipped his own cup. "At least no ugly titans humoring around. Guess you could take it as a good morning."

"Yeah, just ugly humans." You rested your elbow on the table and slouched on your palm, "Humans. My job." You heaved a sigh, "My career's sabotaged."

"Told you. The job I gave you lapsed a long time ago."

"That's a talk outside work, Erwin." You hummed nonchalantly, sipping on the cup.

"It's breakfast. Not work time."

"Then please spare me of your tirades on my emotionality, Commander. I'd rather be doing morning crisis reflections with you instead." You looked at him flatly, the same he's looking at you. You figured both of you are too exhausted to keep the day up, and your back is aching from sitting the night as well. "Sleeping on the chair made me forget the intricate affirmations needed so I could go by subjecting a traumatized teenager to a whole-ass throne. Or something. Please."

He let out a low chuckle, "Quite unusual way to ask for comfort but I suppose I'd get it," He stood up to refill both of your cups, "How about I humor you with a sappy story instead?"

"As long as it's related to my inquiry," You hummed, fully slouching your head this time.

"It is," He gave you your cup again and settled on his seat. "So when I was a child–"

You shot him a glare in disbelief, "Oh my god. We don't have three bottles of wine and a whole night to talk about that."

"I will try to make it short." He smiled. You nodded in doubt but let him regardless, "My father was a history teacher who died after his stupid child spread out his silly theories about walls."

You shot your eyes open, immediately sitting properly, with a small sneer on your reaction he continued. "And apparently, those silly theories came piling up as a reality one after the other. Titans being humans, walls being titans and whatnot."

Your chest clenched. Although these were mere stories you've just heard way back, you're not all unfamiliar with the job of trying to alienate people with the talks outside the walls. You were once alienated by it yourself after all, and you really encountered people who partake in that job to maintain that customary alive.

"That's what I get by so I could subject a traumatized teenage girl towards a throne. Desperation."

"Right, brinkiest brink of the crisis. That's where we are." The situation ran cold your body again, finally getting the much needed urge to partake the heaviness this day would bring. "So, that's the reason why you embarked on such a noble cause." You pondered on it, "You might have your own tendencies but you're not wrong when you say it's for humanity's freedom."

"No. Humanity's freedom is a bluff. You were actually right when you said it was for myself." He quickly clarified, "I'm just pathetically curious and silly hopeful that if I proved my father right, I would be able to atone for my sin of having such a filthy mouth."

You looked down in lament. This might be the only time Erwin laid the particularities of his motivations, but it's not like you didn't figure out the gist of it throughout the years you were tending to him. You knew, and you could still remember your previous anger for his shamelessness, but you've come to terms with his eccentricities now. You actually became shamelessly drawn to him instead as you tried to empathize his struggles further. Recalling your earlier dream of being an empty shell, you were quite relieved now that it wasn't true. You didn't become a goner after your brother died. Erwin rekindled the lost passionate spirit you've long buried in a pile of lies and indifference. You ended up having much more resolve, and another person to protect all your life with.

"You just keep on being painfully honest to me all the time, don't you think? You could've just spurred lies to me as well and I'll become straight up acquiescent. No flailing manners, not even anguish emotional confrontations."

"But that's why I kept you beside me, because you knew it and I have to have someone to remind me how vile I really am from time to time." He looked at you, "See, sometimes my desperation makes me lose myself. My eloquence ends up fooling me as well – that I really am standing to offer my heart in pursuit of humanity's freedom even when it's not."

"Hah," You huffed at the revelation, "So you threatened me out of my job just for this role? Even made me cry out of guilt?"

"Yeah and it's too late to mutter apologies now." He sighed then pondered for a while, "But looking back, I think I was honest with you at some point, though. I really needed you to protect me back then."

"From the titans, Erwin. You did not include yourself. The instruction wasn't clear. Now look at the mess I've become."

"Oh," He thought about it for a while and laughed.

"So many anguish would've been spared had you became honest to me earlier, don't you think? Should've done this the time Wall Maria fell. Then I would've become a much more capable aide."

"You are," He interjected without hesitation, "Even more than anyone could."

"So, all this talk but I can't help but be curious about one thing. If I apparently had the role to keep you in check of who you are and what you really live for, that is so you wouldn't be blinded by your own words," You glanced at him with a hard stare, "Then why are you adamant on dying during that day when I gave you the chance to live?"

Erwin wasn't able to answer and the silence was almost downright annoying. After a while he looked down at the ground, "Maybe the guilt."

"Guilt never fazed you during crises, Erwin. Not when you still have a way out."

"Hm," He smiled sadly. "Right." Then stayed silent again.

Having enough for the lack of response, you continued. "If you're not going to answer that then just give me your word on this." You completely turned to him, "I'll get you out of the Interior's grasp and the mess they're going to make of you anytime today. You could still push through the plan of getting Rod Reiss without the threat of being tortured or killed."

Erwin furrowed his brows on you, "How would you do that?"

"I managed to set a route that you can use to escape anytime soon, at least before late morning. Some soldiers are left standing by. I'll stall the Interior as you escape, then declare you as missing so the Scout soldiers in the vicinity, including me, will be picked up instead."

He was immediately displeased, "You do understand that out of all the Scouts assigned to this very place as we speak, you're the second highest in command. Not to mention you're the commander's escort yourself. You being picked up by them will guarantee immediate torture to squeeze you of my whereabouts. They won't even let you rest in jail for a minute."

"You're right, that's why I need your word that you'll let me out as a pawn."

"You're the one who told us the particularities in the Interior. Unlike me that would be persecuted in public, they'll immediately have you killed behind the curtains."

"Again, I am aware." You looked at him with utter resolve.

"No. That won't work."

"Tell me better options."

"Facing them straight on will lessen the citizen's hostility towards the Scouts. We should not impose risks to our reputation further."

"The Interior's presence as of the moment says otherwise. They're setting up down below as we drink tea and the time they confront us we won't be able to escape their confines. After a day or two state-propaganda will be spread out all over the walls through official news agencies, painting the Survey Corps bad in whatever narrative they see fit."

"That's why we'll lessen the worsening public opinion by–"

"You know that's not what would happen, Erwin. No matter who or how many Scouts they'll capture today, they'll throw all their cards the same."

"Don't attempt to change the chain of commands here. We're standing by my orders. That's final."

You let out a wry sneer at the sight of him failing his rationale, "If you're not giving me your word then answer my question. Why are you adamant on pushing through such threats in your life when I am giving you the chance out of it?"

"Seriously, we're done on this talk." He stood up, took the cups to wash it himself. "I told you that if you'll get that pathetic by my side then just go."

"If there's someone being pathetic here, it's certainly the one failing to have rational reason on this matter."

"I don't believe you have a rational reason yourself."

"If you're speaking of my personal reasons then you might correct. All my motivations are evoked by my own personal feelings hence influencing every proposition and sin I will be making in my life," You spat out. "Still, I stand on my duty and that is to protect the Scouting Regiment, especially the highest chain of command. Now, tell me, Commander, what duty are you holding onto to refuse such a plan?" You pressed further, now gripping harder on the table.

He didn't answer, when he finished washing the cups he settled a spare glass and a pitcher of water on the table. When you realized he isn't going to take whatever you're asking of him now, you added with finality. "If you refuse to convince me otherwise, I'll see to it that this plan will be done. I have nothing to lose here. Muster up your resolve on the role you've put me in and make me do my job."

Erwin had his back on you, one side of his body leaned on the wall. He wasn't saying anything, not even grunts of disapproval, seething anger, or stance akin to disdain. But even before you stood up, the door banged open again; it was Hange this time. "Is Erwin here! Whew, there you are!" They started shouting again, "Eren remembered some vital information about the titans and its bad news! We have to rethink this plan! He said it might've been just a dream so we shouldn't take it seriously, but fuck! If this is true then it would be really bad. We have to deal with this immediatel–"

"Be straight to the point. What's the problem?" He cut them off and gave them a glass of water.

"The Reiss," Hange reached for the glass, coming down from their high, "Wants to eat Eren."

You stood up with a sharp breath, your fists immediately clenching. The only hope for Erwin to come out of this unscathed is to seize the Reiss and squeeze them of all the needed information and convincing. If making them acquiescent will never be in the consideration, then he might really be bound to death this time.

Sensing your upcoming outburst, he gave you a hard stare. "Stop. Guard outside."

You stopped, but you were still seething and you don't know if it's out of anger or fear. You looked at him unfaltering, taunting that you're not hesitating on this. After a while, his look at you softened, "I really don't have enough time to convince you otherwise, and I'm honestly at a loss because it was never rational to begin with." He turned sideways to ponder about it, hesitated, then just ended up heaving a sigh. "The day I asked you to quit and the night after you killed him." He walked towards you, ushering you out of the room as he did, "Skim through that memory, repeatedly if you can. You're smart enough to figure out how irrational those moments were. Whatever comes up in your mind is correct. If you grasp it, then respect my irrationality instead of taunting me for a valid reason." You're now out of the room, "And as you hold on to that, gather as many Scouts as you could out of this place and do the role I've put in you; protect your comrades." He banged the door shut.

You released a ragged breath in sheer panic and a tear messily ran down you as soon as it was closed hardly. You clenched on your fist until nails crept your skin to bruise and bleed. As if you didn't feel powerless already the past few days, now you feel downright inferior. Entering the regiment with heavy reluctance, you still did as you're told – getting sincere to the cause, protecting whoever and whatever, and staying in line with it at the cost of your life. Even when you slipped into an honest mistake you still kept yourself up, so you just don't understand why. You only need one thing from him and that is his resolve. You're not asking him to reciprocate whatever dumb feelings you've garnered towards him. You're just asking him to be himself and let you die.

Still, despite the throbbing urge to go against this one, you decided to follow it. Even though it was quite too late, you were able to spare a lot of Scouts from the arrest including yourself. When Dimo Reeves' body was shown to everyone and publicly cornered Erwin through it, you almost lost your cool in desperation to have him out. The cards they laid was murder. They will not get him out of this alive. No coaxes to the public eye, not even a space for sentiments.

Luckily, you spotted the other Reeves which you remembered as Flegel. Seeing a potential escape from this, you grabbed him instead and fled up, meeting Hange in a surprise along the way. They focused their attention on coaxing Flegel first and as you finally set onto another place to regather and strategize, they turned into you. "You won't let those words be the last thing Erwin will say to you, do you?"

"Huh?"

"Retrieve him from that mess and slap him in the face. That's what he needs to get instead. Got it?" You angrily fought back on your tears for a while then as brought up a new resolve, you successfully gulped it down and nodded.

Just as you expected, state-propagated news scattered immediately. The headline isn't even meant for trial, it's already concluded.

"Our plan is to visit them later on but, well." Hange shrugged, "Guess you're up for a happy sweet reunion right now?"

"I bet it would be sweet. Printing Nifa and the others as coldblooded murderers and painting even my wanted poster." You flatly looked at the publication material and fastened the knife on your waist, "I understand his reasons though. We had a talk about it once. Just hits different now." But then Hange motioned their finger no. "Ah-ah-ah, can't do that. We'll do the knife and you'll do the talk. Fix your face." You sighed and shot them with your constricted smile, the one they're humored to see of you in every diplomatic talk with Erwin. "Perfect! Let's go!"

You were mostly in charge of actually convincing them to publish whatever unfolds the Reeves' corporation so when Hange and Moblit finally arrived with them on the roof, you're the one who stayed with them.

Roy, the director of the Berg's Newspaper that you've been acquainted with, greeted your presence with a shock, "You really are–" The old man stuttered, "Alive?"

"Very much so. You drew my poster just fine, didn't you?" You flatly remarked as you secured the safety of the hideout. "I think my face's the one most accurate, maybe you helped them point it out?"

He looked at you apologetically, "I'm sorry. They knew we had met before. They asked me to… add details." But then he examined you again, "But it seems like it's not that accurate anymore if I'd be honest myself. What happened to you?"

You blandly greeted his friend first, name's Pierre, then turned to Roy, "New apprentice?"

"Yeah. Not as composed as your brother but as eager as he is. Too innocent for this world just yet." He answered, "Anyway, how's your brother–"

"Really?" You turned to Pierre and playfully squinted his eyes on him, "How eager are you for this world?" Your tone interrogating.

"I–" Pierre stuttered with a blush on his face, but Roy coaxed her, "Tell her. She's like me but younger. Show her how silly your aspirations in life are." You nodded as well, encouraging him.

"I actually had a dream to unravel the wonders inside the walls, even beyond where the Scouts travel, if possible. That's why I ventured this job." He then sheepishly laughed, "And I think coming to here was of my own accord, because I still hoped to do it." And gave you a cheeky smile.

You smiled wistfully at Roy, "You're right, Roy. He's really like him. But I'm not who I was before, so I'm really rooting for Pierre this time around. Passionate souls aren't bound to death all the time."

"So, really, where's your brother?"

"Dead. Way before the wall fell." It made his eyes shot wide. He really took a liking to that runt. "Even me who's already like you at such a young age would end up risking it all once everything's lost, see?" With his eyes turning into worry, you continued. "So watch. All these people below think the same as you, even right now."

And they did, they witnessed eyes and ears the worlds of the Military Police themselves, and you're sure this hits close to home for Roy. As the Reeves people mob on the soldiers down, only horror went up Roy's face.

As Hange stepped up on the stairs, they said. "So what do you think? That MPs right, the truth won't spread on its own. You're the only ones who can reach the people."

Pierre urged him to go for it, eager to expose the Military Police and clean up the Survey Corps' name. Eventually, Roy shouted back. "Then try it! Try it and see where it goes! All our colleagues and friends are as good as dead! There was once a miner who disappeared after digging under the wall. When one of my friends looked into it, they disappeared too! That's how things work inside these walls! We live because the king allows us to live. You can see that, right?" Then he turned to every Scout soldier near him, including you.

"And you almost disappeared along with your friend until my brother saved you through it." You replied to him, "And my brother, being the dumb one, begged me to save your family somehow because the MP was very close at including them. Just because your little kid slipped a tiny phrase about it. I was kind of defeatist towards you too, right? That's why you told Pierre we're the same. But see, Roy, my brother, a very dumbly passionate meek man that he is, was the one who saved you from that predicament. And you have that chance too, not only for a single family alone."

Pierre held on to Roy's collar, "These royal government pigs have no intention of saving the people! Do you still not understand? The next time the titans attack, there won't be anything left. Not out company! Not our families!"

Roy looked very confused and he's on the verge of crying. Then his eyes slid towards you as you looked down at him very flatly, "Not even me or my brother, would be left to sneak out and ensure the safety of your family when they get targeted again. And most especially, if the titans are to be the ones doing the targeting."

Your remark made him avert his stare again. Eventually, as the tears welled up his eyes, he heaved a smile. "Never thought a time would come where I would be able to return such a huge favor from you, young girl. I'm sure your brother's proud at you up there." You just nodded, not believeing the notion that there's a scrape of him left even in another world.

With the people finally appeased of Roy's concurrence, you looked at Pierre again and noticed his full smiles at you, the vigor and joy of hope flashing through him. Just like how your brother looked at Erwin. You smiled back endearingly and ruffled his hair, "Good job, Pierre. Humanity needs people who are eager to give them the truth they very much deserved. You have a long path ahead but you're doing very great already." Pierre sheepishly smiled with a flush, "If a humanity's hero like you would say that then I'll surely believe in myself more."

All of you rushed to finish the article as soon as possible in the publishing house. And as soon as Roy had finished the first original copy, he tossed it towards you and Hange beamed in concurrence, “You look like shitting anytime soon, so go where you need to. You wanted to save Erwin, right? The military divisions are being gathered now to discuss the disbanding of the Survey Corps. You can still keep up if you run on it now.”

Indeed, you can save him for a while.

So you did. You quickly chased down through it with your horse with ragged pants and beats of your chest ringing loudly in anxiousness. When you came across the execution platform being built just across the public view, a further feeling of rush ravaged your body. Upon reaching the royal castle, you quickly head towards Anka, Pixis' aide, who was waiting for you outside with a spare Garrison uniform along the way.

"You came just on time! Commander Erwin was summoned just now."

"How does he look?" You pressed, fixing on the uniform neatly and gulping your ragged breaths down.

Anka hesitated for a while, "He looked really bad."

"Eyes gone?" She shook her head no. "Still with one limb?" She nodded. "Two feet?" She nodded.

"Then he can do it." You bit down your inner lip, trying to convince yourself, "That bastard."

"You know, not even a shift on uniform can hide you," Zackley called out your name. Both of you immediately saluted. "You think no one would notice? When you're a silly transferee? And when you're practically glued on the man currently being held in trial?"

"Just for precautionary measures, Sir. It might be weird if I entered in casual clothes or black cloak." You gave him the news article published by Berg's. "It's currently being mass produced as we speak, but it's only a matter of time until everyone receives the news."

Zackley smirked upon reading and let out tsks along the way, "As expected of you, Scouts. Always ten steps ahead like your Commander." He turned his back on you. "You can join my men as they work on suppressing the central military police. Anka will set to announce the fake wall breach in a moment. You can shortly tend to Erwin after she gives an update and marks my entrance."

Shortly after she entered and you maintained to guard around with jittery feet, noises from the room erupted. Zackley was insanely excited, however. That's why as soon as Anka ran back with positive signals, Zackley released a snarl and walked proudly. You followed Anka to finalize the command in Military Police suppression, then you joined her inside upon reporting. As the commotion unfolded, you quickly made your way to release Erwin of his confines.

"What–" He flinched upon seeing you appear abruptly. Upon holding on his restraints, you looked at his face with distaste. "Fucking terrible," You spat out to stop the lump forming up on your throat at the sight. "You look repulsive. I told you–" You harshly removed the chains, dropping it down with a yelp. "We could've done this the other way." You grit on your teeth, examine his whole body, then when it's clear his only visible difficulty was with walking, you clung his arm around you and ushered him outside.

Upon entering the room intended to clean him and change his clothes, you scooted him on a chair. "Where are the others?" He asked as you gently removed his top. He hissed along the way as the piece of cloth exposed vast toture marks flattened all over his skin, sorting from lashes, burns, punches, and other detailed marks immediately needed to be checked in the hospital right after cleaning this up. You weren't even able to note he's actually asked something as the sight formed overwhelming rings of pain in your head. As you cleaned on him silently, he asked again. "Where are the others?"

"Doing their wonders in ensuring Squad Levi's safety since they're the ones confronting the Interior. I just ran here with the news. I'm the only Scout in the vicinity right now." You knelt down on him, your head on the same level as his chest.

"Why are you wearing the Garrison uniform?"

"I'll change in a while."

"You teamed up with Pyxis? Were you aware of their decision before coming here?"

"They just gave me their spare garment."

"Answer my questions properly." He sternly directed but you cut him off by glazing quite hardly on a blemish of his chest and a hard glare. He let out a sharp grunt.

"Sorry, I don't intend to press such emotional matters on you when you're clearly unwell but," You went gently again, "I don't sit well sharing my plans to someone who eagerly denied it without even talking it out, spurring pathetic notions of just respecting the irrationality," You cut yourself off with a ragged sigh, "–during a crucial moment where genuine reason is needed."

He was shot silent for a while and you went on with your job, making sure to be swift yet keen on every wound especially since some of it sat for days without getting tended. As you worked on his chest, he spoke, "I'm sorry."

You tried to ignore the remark but the way your hand trembled upon it told him otherwise. "Sorry," He called your name this time around. You realized the tremble in your hands were just heightening so you gently rested your equipment on the medicine toolbox just beside you. With his beaten up figure seated before you, you're curled on your knees on the floor and let out a heavy sigh.

"Are we talking about this now," You lowly asked, your eyes glued to the ground.

"I've been thinking about it for days." He replied.

You bit on your lower lip, "You know, we can talk this out after your wounds are tended properly–"

"No. Sorry."

You sighed, "Okay, give me a moment." He hummed through it. After forming your words, you looked up at him. "To make this quick, regarding the rationality you've tried to–"

"I told you whatever comes up in your mind is correct."

"What's coming up in my mind right now as I see how battered you've got is regret." You shot back, paused for a while, and realized you won't be able to have coherent thoughts over this conversation. "Just tell me what you've thought about the past few days that you can't sit until you're tended properly."

"That I regret the choice of keeping you beside me. I should've just let you quit the time you asked. It was quite more unbearable than the hitting itself."

"Well, you are free to feel all the regret regarding your downright behavior but I'm the only person allowed to ponder if my stay in the Survey Corps was for the better or not." With that, you finally softened up. Regaining your hold on the cleaning kit, you went back to your work again. "I had messy reunions with some people I met before joining the Scouts, either clashing with them in a fight or just dreaming about them on a weary night. Meeting them again was more of relieving rather than regretful. All of them apparently thought I was an empty shell that'll break for good once my brother disappears on me. But I didn't break, nor I think I'm an empty shell," You pondered for a while, curling your eyebrows along the way, "Or am I?"

Erwin slightly chuckled, "You're not."

"Right. I'm not." You sneered, "I actually don't care on the role you've put me in anymore. You're being pathetic over it."

"I suppose I am."

You hummed in concurrence and stayed silent, the atmosphere finally calmed down and comfortable. Finishing up on the clean up, you added. "And I'm glad we were able to get you back alive. I was very desperate on it."

"Because?"

You held on to his uniform and guided him on it, "Because I don't want to hear such a vile remark from you when we part ways."

previous chapter | next chapter

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sleeppfordays · 2 years

Text

The Wilds S2 bad commentary Ep3

Why does it feel like the boys island seem much more dangerous than the girls (obvi not including that fucking shark) it seems like Gretchens experiment is biase af something that we already know

Also ngl I would have thrown that fucking water at Gretchen’s face

“Does she know that is was out there?” 100% she wanted those kids to be shish kebabs

IM STILL CONFUSED ON THE WHOLE SHONI SITUATION, THEY CUDDLING IN FRONT OF EVERYONE?? DID WE NOT GET A FUCKING REVEALED? DID SHE JUST MOVED ON FROM THE YEARS OF TRAUMA SHE EXPERIENCE FROM HER OWN FATHER?? WTF IS GOING ON IM MISSING CHAPTERS NAH SCRATCH THAT A WHOLE FUCKING BOOK

DOMESTIC TONI

The tree we saw in those leaks?

ALSO THE FUCKING TRIVIA: FYI Nora always made her bed (they trying to make me fucking sob)

Gretchen writing like Amber Fucking Heard

The Progressive Lady? Bo wtf AHAHAHAHHA

SHELBY’S LITTLE WHERE YOU GOING? AKSJAKDJSJ MY HEART

A signed out sheet, totes mom energy

RACHEL AND LEAH a pairing I never knew a needed, fucking love them

And she’s writing in Nora’s books BEACH IM SOBBING

“Gorgeous eye catching hair” the fucking sass I love him

When I saw someone drawing I almost screamed cause I thought it was Nora

Okay ngl Henry is kinda getting on my nerves but good dam he did not need to almost drown him

Seth making something on the spot to validate why he almost killed Henry, fucking psychotic, but also kinda funny??

”You’ll be such a hot carpenter” BEACH IM SCREAMING I LOVE THEM SO MUCH the hype man energy they keep to support each other 🤌

Fatin and Martha? Another unexpected pairing and I love it, love that they’re giving us all these pairings that are not the usual ones

I love the transition from masturbation to the boys standing on a fucking ledge

He just called him “Karen”

Henry’s personality doing a full 180 is a bit of a whiplash

Shelby worrying so much about Toni makes me feel so lonely but holy shit it is so wholesome

THE LIP BITE AND PULL AKDJAKDJSKXJ

Seth literally change the morals of the group is such a Shelby thing

Not him actually peeing on the ledge

I love Bo and Scotty’s relationship, family doesnt define blood just like Martha and Toni

RACHELS FACE WHEN LEAHS VOICE CHANGED FOR THE PERFORMANCE

They practiced for 2 hours AHAHAHHA

Ngl I thought they were going to bust Raise a Glass

THE SINGING IS BACK

OMFG I THOUGHT LEAH WAS GOING TO KISS FATIN

MARTHA IS DANCING THIS ISNT A FUCKING DRILL EVERYONE CALM DOWN, CALM THE FUCK DOWN

THE SHONI SLOWMO

The boat, I see the angst coming

“Its just you and me” making me cry out here

And that concludes Ep3 of S2! Let me know which format y’all like best! I hope you guys are enjoying it as much as I am!

Episode 4 here we come!

#the wilds #the wilds season 2 #the unsinkable eight #bad the wilds s2 commentary

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one-dumb-fucker · 1 year

Text

You can also find me @ one_dumb_fucker on wattpad.

You can find me on tumbler at

cod-obsessor

marvel-obsessor

pjo-obsessor

starwars-obsessor

Etc, pretty much any obsession I've ever had and -obsessor

I make shit about all my obsessions. If it's not on the list feel free to ask.

Won't write:

Children; pregnancy; miscarriage; etc. (90 percent of the time. You can discuss it with me, but no children getting hurt; it's a trigger for me -or what I like to call, a "trauma trigger".

Age regression (same reason, it's something related to children/childish things)

Age play.

Heavy digression kink.

Slut shaming if it's not past tense or for the plot.

Specifically f!reader or m!reader. (They're are too many stories out there where they seem so promising, then everytime its f!reader. I'm here to make stuff everyone can read, even if they don't enjoy it, because guess what? I've got variety!)

Might write:

A/B/O (I don't really like it)

Boy/girl or more special cis/het couple (I'm just not good at it, so they won't be the main couple. Background is fine though. You can ask for it, main or not, just talk to me)

Daddy kink (just not good at it, sorry😅)

Mommy kink (I will make an exception for this cus sometimes it's hot; weither or not the one being called it is female or even slightly feminine)

Will write:

Fluff

Hurt/comfort (although I'm not sure if I'm that good at it)

Crack/trash fic (my specialty 🌚)

Smut

BDSM (🤌✨)

AU's (I love these!)

Meet cute

I'll edit this when more stuff comes to my mind

#arp.1.2023 #the date is just for me cuz its something i do

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warmthintouches · 1 year

Text

Wtf. Wtf. Wtf.

He was so nice. And he was so hot.

He was shorter than I expected. And his voice really shocked me. And I...didn't mind just talking to him while we watched anime. And when we got his house he was walking up the steps in front of me and I got nervous so I grabbed the back of his hoodie not really thinking about it. And I felt him look at me and blush. I could feel~ him blushing. Then he unlocked the door and he was going in front of me again but without even looking at me just reached his hand back for me to hold to navigate his house.

And he was so hot. Fucking hot 🔥🔥🔥🔥

He showed me his gaming set up and apologized for his bed sheets being old. But I thought it was cute that he made his bed before I came over. He asked if I was sure I wanted to be there, and told me it'd been a year since he'd been with someone and he was sorry if he was too quick at first. And I promised that I wanted to be there and I was comfortable and it was fine however fast he wanted to go. And then he did something different....

He asked to hug me first. Before we got into bed or kissed. And I said okay. And we just hugged. And it was a little weird hugging an almost complete stranger. It seemed... intimate. We finally kissed then and it was 🤌 it wasn't super slow or super fast, just nice. It felt warm. And I liked when he slipped his hands under my hoodie to feel my skin. so many things...

So fucking hot. At one point I even said "youre so fucking hot" after he did something I really liked...and I swear he blushed a little, then kissed me so fucking hard.

He just automatically assumed i was staying the night too, it was nice to not be kicked out or tried to rush. He and got me the heavier blanket bc I was cold. He asked if it was okay to cuddle while we slept and I said of course. And I woke up once and he was very close to me and idk if it was bc I moved that he half woke up but he started to give me the cutest, softest kisses. They were so ...soft~ and gentle. And I appreciated that he asked if he could touch me before he started, to make sure I was awake..

(At some point I would like to inform him that I have some weird fucking trauma about being woken up to being touched weirdly and kindly ask him to make sure im awake before he tries anything)

But his kisses remained so soft, and i got excited so then they were not soft 😏😏😏

The next morning he was very quiet while moving around to not wake me. And he even got back into bed and cuddled me which I wasn't sure if he would. And he was very nice. I liked that he kept putting his hands under my shirt to feel my skin... He asked if I was still okay with it and I said yes, everything was super nice. And then I know he was going to be late for work. He didn't even make me leave until 8:40 and he worked at 9. But he walked me to do the door and outside when I left bc I wanted to walk. I wasn't sure what kind of goodbye he would give and was pleasantly surprised when he hugged me very tight and then kissed me, right there, in the daylight, on his porch. And kissed my cheek right before he let go...

And then...

Me: thank you for having me over.

Him: thanks for coming over, I had fun 😊

Me: you sure?

Him: yes im positive. Ty for not running away when you seen me.

Me: I would never...

Him: 🥰

Me: hehe you cute

Him: no way! You are definitely the cute one in this.

Me: shush, you cute fr

Him: I disagree

Me: well, we could both be cutie pies y'know. 😄

Him: I suppose. But why can't you just be cute?

Me: bc I think you're cute

Him: hm.. maybe.

Me: just accept that I think you're cute.

Him: its hard to accept that anyone thinks I'm cute, especially you.

Me: 😳 especially me? You shush, you can't disagree when im stating facts.

Him: who fact checked it?

Me: I did, I am queen of the cute and I declare you are.

Him: ....I guess since you're the queen of cute ill allow it.

#lenny

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iwantlarry · 2 years

Text

Ugh anons on Tumblr scare me now lmao 😂 like we get it lmao 😂😂😂😂 but now that everyone's miserable all of sudden lmao 😂😂😂 let's not pretend to be stupid lmao 😂😂😂😵😂 it's funny getting exposed lmao 😂😂😂😵 into being oh so happy lmao 😂😂😵😂 what makes me laugh the most is that it's funny to laugh lmao 😂😂 in a very funny way lmao 😂😂😂 funny to me then hysterical now lmao 😂😂 I'm like huh lmao 😂😂😵 i wondered if internalized traumas lead to horrible decisions lmao 😂🤌😂 it's like the Bible lmao 😂🤌 or something lmao 😂🤌😂 but not in o gods not real lmao 😂🤌😂 it's like in a oh lmao 😂🤌 life's real and it don't stop lmao 😂😂 for no one lmao 😂🤌😂 ugh and now we're gon a get the brunt end of bad decisions lmao 😂🤌 its like everyones the age they always stayed in lmao 😂🤌 but man to be overexposed os the worst lmao 😂🤌😂 oh big whoop lmao 😂🤌😂 only the truth will prevail lmao 😂🤌😂 i have to laugh lmao 😂🤌🤘 nope not even an over exaggerated way lmao 😂 just to funny to make up lmao 😂😆😂 ugh what a time to be alive lmao 😂😹😂 funny nah mad annoying lmao 😂😂 now everyone better sat happy birthday Liam lmao 😂 he's gone be 30 nah 29 lmao 😂🤌😂 bro why paint y'all self's to be older lmao 😂🤌😂 like it's funny lmao 😂😂 now im tired lmao 😂🤌😂 it's 2 am lmao 😂🤌😂 and ots the best birthday ive had in years lmao 😂🤌😂 and I didn't get drunk lmao 😂🤌😂 just heard the drunk stories from my sister and man it aint good over there lmao 😂🤌 I'm just hoping when that fat bitch Karina goes to prison they get her good 👍😤👍 now theure trying to blame my tias friend conchita in saying that she could of stopped hok fr getting murdered by his mom yeah 👍 special place in hell for her and I can't wait to hear the Storys about her suffering in prison for life 🧬🥺🥺 definitely been to sad 😭 and hopefully praying she'll never set a foot out ever again 😤🥰🥰 like he was only 7 you guys and she's looking at 90 to life and all my dumbass cousins still on that dumb shit lmao 😂😂 it's like bro can y'all stfu lmao 😂😂 an quit doing drugs lmao 😂🤌😂 at least take care of ur body's before you end up worse lmao 😂🤌😂 like damn it lmao 😂 family to dramatic call me Dr dream lmao 😂😂 and it's not just the family now theyre having kids lmao 😂 an im like huh lmao 😂🤌😂 more shitty people in the family for what lmao 😂😂 oh but bo that their grown with kids its everyone else's fault lmao 😂 like bro whoa fault was it being shitty kids lmao 😂🤌😂 yalls fault lmao 😂🤌😂 oh but too cool lmao 😂😂 nah it wanst funny then to our parents an now its worse off for yall lmao 😂😂😂 its like wow honoring ur parents os the way to be blessed by god himself idk who said lmao 😂😂😂 oh but you can't taje it back lmao 😂😂 oh ok lmao 😂😂 but keeping up pretenses also makes u a dumbass lmao 😂🤌😂 oh well lmao 😂😂 ugh 😩😫 it's to funny I can't even make it up lmao 😂🤌😂 I have to laugh lmao 😂🤌 like huh lmao 😂🤌😂 oh but so changed ya cuando weyes lmao 😂🤌😂 5 kids in an ur still miserable lmao 😂🤌😂 to late now lmao 😂🤌 ugh it's to funny I can't even like log off lmao 😂🤌 it really is who's the drama me nah lmao 😂🤌😂 I'm to not fake I'll never be able to fake anything lmao 😂🤌😂 but I'll pray lmao 😂🤌 but gah damn I won't forget lmao 😂🤌😂 an that's on the real god lmao 😂🤌 oh so cute nah lmao 😂🤌😂 silent judgements lmao 😂 in not bitter way lmao 😂 in I'll laugh lmao 😂🤌😂 later lmao 😂🤌 ugh and this is why i never posted on Tumblr since I made one lmao 😂🤌 ugh 😩😫 man god is real and im glad people came to their senses quick lmao 😂🤌😂 embarrassing yeah lmao 😂🤌 but idgaf lmao 😂🤌😂 I'll laugh to their faces lmao 😂🤌😂 like huh lmao 😂🤌 i knew it lmao 😂😂 misread your text lmao 😂 no 😂😂 i gotta laugh with how fake everyone is lmao 😂🤌 now they can't even be mad lmao 😂🤌 promise I won't judge but fuck it's funny to me now lmao 😂🤌😂😂 now twitter is on to me and that's never good lmao 😂🤌😂 how I get trolls before most people got fame lmao 😂🤌 i have to laugh lmao 😂🤌😂 like huh lmao 😂🤌😂

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