Mhungry but ithurtssomuch to eat causeof owwieon gums//roof offmouth …

That makes sense

Maybe some apple sauce?

Have you ever felt your heart just breaking? Like your inside is completely torn apart? Like you feel one with the ground and Like the floor begs for you to stay laying there? Have you ever felt like if you screamed with everything you had you would still not be heard from anyone? Well..that's what like a heartbreak feels like..kinda actually, no one can ever describe this pain.

What happened to the nights I cried loudly beside my window? Did they heal? Did everything turn to be better? No.

I paid lots of money to psychologists to show any signs of love to me. Any kind of affection, appreciation, care... I only wanted hear that I am not the problematic one, not the one that has all the faults. I only wanted feel safe without being afraid of the consequences. I only wanted to show my feelings without being afraid of them being judged. I wanted to feel that I am cared for by using MY own money, for nothing. For just a fraud. For a caregiver game that I’ve created. What a shame. What a foolishness. To even think that I may be a normal person like any other. How ridiculous.

I wanted to die so badly because I worth nothing. I prayed for every god/goddess/demon I could reach to, to take away my pain. What happened? What happened to my misery? It only got worse.

Tonight, I just can’t stand it anymore. I don’t want to hear anybody say that I am special, I deserve to live, pain is not permanent. PAIN IS FUCKING PERMANENT AND IS FUCKING KILLING ME SINCE I WAS FUCKING SEVEN. WHOLE 13 YEARS!

What a shame to be nothing. What a shame to be no one. What a shame to be useless.

What a shame to be never enough.

Crimson Steel

Each knife slicing through the air hitting it’s target Hot blades, weaponized words, baldrics loaded Special care went into sharpening each piece Thought for where to grab from quickest To hit the fastest hunt first  Neither quick enough Both hit, sharp, crimson red swirls from chest to hip Expressionless eyes looking at one another one last time Mouths with silent words asking ‘why’ We fall

I THINK I LOST MY ONLY CHANCE

I have the unhealthy habit of yelling at my screen at a story whenever sth too cute/too embarrassing/too whatever happens and I'm pretty sure people around me consider me weird for that BUT I CAN'T HELP IT. I mean I'm still in the middle of reading the 2nd part of melody, but when you dropped the "You should know by now that I think everything you do is cute, Y/N..." - I just had to tell melody!JK to "shut the fck up because it'S/HE's being too cute". (1/2)

Anyway,,, just wanted to share that lmao sorry I loved the first part and have been looking forward to coming home from work to read the second part, so I'm sure I'll love it just as much. Thank you for spoiling us with your amazing writing skills!!! (2/2)

also just as an update to my earlier messages, i low??? nah highkey loved that story and consider it one of my favourites and will re-read it 39083 times. and it also made me wanna book a vacation to italy to experience everything firsthand, so imma go and pack my bags !! (although not to italy just yet lmao to berlin first to see the adorable dorks that got featured in your amazing story. I ramble a lot when I love sth, I'm so sorry. Anyway,,, thank you again for this masterpiece!!)

ahhh this means the world to meeee!!! when you guys quote my stuff back to me my heart size increases tenfold, so thank you for that writer’s ego boost oml!!!!! i’m so glad you enjoyed moonlight melody and i hope you have an absolutely wonderful time at your concert!!!!! bts put on some of the best spectaculars out there. they’re amazing performers and even more amazing individuals ;-; i hope you have the time of your life !!!! thank you so much for reading mm it means so much !!

Today I had to say goodbye to my Everything my dearest boy Magnus aka King Kitty. Sickness took him and it was now time to give him peace before he was in any pain. I love him so dearly. Sleep tight my darling baby boy. We have had a wonderful life together. Now was your time I will meet you at the rainbow bridge my darling Furbaby. #GoodbyesAreHard #ItHurtsSoMuch #ItWasForHisBest #MyFurbaby #MyFamilar #MyBaby #MyEverything #Denmark #GonnaMissHimSoMuch #BlackCat #KingKitty #RainbowBridge #WeWillMeetAgain. #LoveYou 😭💔❤🐱 #RestInPeace (at Aalborg, Denmark)

You and me were broken at the same time. You gave up her for me. I was so happy that I didn’t even realize you were stuck on her. This is so hard.

The good days are gone since you left me.

Hello again, so I am rewatching the 100 (yeah I talked to myself to start but I couldn't help myself..) . I am in the second episode of season 1 and I just keep thinking of Wells, you know. He was so smart and kind and loved Clarke so much. It wasn't fair to kill him off so fast, i would like to see his interaction with the bellamy we know now..

How he tried to safe the girl who Murphy was baking on fire and so on and so on ...

Thats all guys :(

Today has been one month since you left us. Sometimes it feels like "only" a month and other times it feels like "already" a month. I miss you daily. I know daddy does too. I know daddy doesn't like when I write, but sometimes it's my therapy. I don't do it to make us sad, I do it to keep your memory fresh. I just still can't believe you aren't here. I can't physically touch you. Your voice is already fading in my head and that scares me. I just want to hug you one more time, hold your hand one more time, hear your laugh one more time. My friend posted a song yesterday that was perfect. I am jealous of the angels. I love you so much it physically hurts. It's a pain you can't describe to anyone who hasn't felt it before. I have joy through all this because I KNOW where you are. I think, I KNOW thats the only thing that gets me through. I hope you are walking through a beautiful green field with tons of flowers barefoot just like you wanted. I hope you get to see beautiful sunrises and sunsets daily. I hope you think of us too. I love you mama. #seeyoulater #imissyou #ithurtssomuch #apainlikenoother https://www.instagram.com/p/B7qpxyTB3F9/?igshid=13t63fcor6l3d

The shadow on the first pic looks like Scooby-Doo !! Ahah ^^ Scoobydoobydoooooooooo 🐕 Anyway, the new Red Cross Hospital has been quite disappointing. The first ER team didn’t do anything and the situation with my finger got worse so thank you for nothing. I hope I can recover very (very!) soon, because being left-handed I can’t do anything right now. P.S. the hospital’s bed and pillow are also very uncomfortable, I got a backache. it’s unbelievable for a brand new place... Avoid this place ! . . . #finger #wound #fingerwound #painful #ithurtssomuch #help #scared #sendprayers #antibiotics #redcross #redcrosshospital #fml #vdm (à 前橋赤十字病院　高度救命救急センター) https://www.instagram.com/p/B6WnzJMHjho/?igshid=qhaxod83xmk0

#depression #howifeel #sad #tired #emptiness #nightmare #currently #ithurtssomuch

Waitin on the world to change... #hair #dyeing #hairdye #mua #makingachange #prayformyscalp #ithurtssomuch

Jasmine Tea, Iced Cafe Mocha and Herbal Tea! ♡

Answered the first two, buuut

Herbal Tea: You’re at a candle shop, what scented candle do you buy?

Nothing really floral, probably something sweet smelling but not sickly or mulled-winey? I don’t go to candle shops very often but I like those fragrances this time of year - warm and comforting. I bought a candle recently that was caramelised almonds or something and that was really nice

{+}// I stumbled across this and; @lastdissent || @usurperr