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justwritedreams · 1 year

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Now you know | Chanyeol

Idol!Chanyeol x Idol!Reader Word count: 2035 Genre: fluff, kinda crack Author: maari Warnings: none Note: I loved writing this so much oh my god 😫 thank you ateez for giving me the perfect scenario lol Request: may i request a fluffy chanyeol fic where his s/o is also an idol (94L) and theyre “secretly” dating but theyre bad at acting subtle so the fans know whats up + ships them lol ⫷ Exo Masterlist

"So, what do you think?" Y/N asked her boyfriend curiously, she was lying on his chest, the two of them in bed spending the weekend doing what they so deserved, resting.

After all, both would have long weeks ahead of them and they would hardly have the chance to see each other or be together.

She was holding her cell phone, after showing him one of the intro tracks from her upcoming album.

"I loved it, it has a very cinematic fantasy vibe." he replied, with a proud smile as he stroked her hair.

"I told you the concept of this comeback is going to be like this, right?" the boyfriend nodded in agreement. "And we're going to have a collaboration with that American producer."

"You seem quite excited." he concluded, he didn't look at her face because his position wouldn't allow it, as she huddled in his embrace like a koala, but he could imagine the glint in her eyes. “I’m!” she said, raising her head to look at him better, as he predicted there was the sparkle in her eyes of pure pride and happiness. "It will be the first time I get to show my more mature side to fans."

Chanyeol laughed and the hand that was stroking her hair went to his girlfriend's arm. "Should I be jealous?" he raised an eyebrow and she laughed softly.

Y/N held the phone with one hand and the other brought it to Chanyeol's cheek, stroking his skin slowly.

"No, you're the only one who knows all of my sides."

He lifted his chin, a rather proud look knowing he was the only one and Y/N smiled before she leaned closer to kiss him, she had been doing this all day but it wasn't enough, when the lips were a centimeter away from touching, Chaneyol even had his eyes closed Y/N's phone vibrated not just once or twice but five times. She complained and threw her head on her boyfriend's chest who still had his pout to kiss her. Y/N took her head off Chanyeol's chest and brought her phone closer, seeing what was going on through the notification bar.

"Is my leader." she said "Why does it seem like she always does it on purpose?"

Chanyeol laughed heartily and his girlfriend wanted to bite his cheek but she held back and unlocked the phone. "You shouldn't talk about your leader like that." Chanyeol joked.

"I'm older than she is, have you forgotten?" Y/N glanced at her boyfriend, Chanyeol now resting his arm behind his head, his biceps got bigger in the black t-shirt he was wearing.

She opened the twitter link that was sent in the message, along with the phrase 'you have to see this. ASAP'.

Y/N felt her jaw drop when she saw the tweet and tensed up all of a sudden, this didn't go unnoticed by her boyfriend who now wiped the smile off his face and frowned.

"What?" he asked, analyzing his girlfriend's expression.

"Look at this." she turned the phone screen towards Chanyeol who focused his attention on the tweet, he gulped when he saw the picture of him and his girlfriend.

There was nothing much but from what they wrote, the suspicions were there.

Chanyeol and Y/N had gone to NCT 127's concert the night before, to support the boys from the same company and because she was a huge fan of the boys, they hadn't gone alone of course. Two members of Y/N's group were on her right side while Chanyeol, Sehun and Baekhyun were on her right side, exactly in that order.

In one photo they were just looking at the stage while in the other Chanyeol had his arm around Y/N's neck and the other was up. They were just enjoying the show, nothing else.

But fan comments came to the same conclusion: they were dating.

"Oh come on, it's not even that compromising!" he said and Y/N turned the phone's screen towards her, while bringing her other hand to her mouth to bite the nail. "We were just singing Dreams Come True."

"But it's not what the fans think, there's even a video of you hugging me." Y/N said, watching on her phone.

It really wasn't compromising, mainly because afterwards, Chanyeol hugged Sehun in the same way.

"Oh give me that." he took his arm behind his head to grab his girlfriend's phone.

"Hey!" she complained but he started swiping the screen. "Look, there are a lot of people thinking I was just being me." he glanced at Y/N who eyed him suspiciously. "I'll read it to you: 'lol he literally leans on Sehun afterwards, so they're dating', ew no!" Chanyeol stuck his tongue out in disgust and Y/N chuckled lightly.

"Good thing they were at an NCT show because if it was a comedy Y/N would probably be without an arm"

"Yeah, you do that with people when you laugh."

"But hey, there are a lot of people who shipp us."

"Really?" Y/N asked curiously and tried to snoop through the phone.

"They even made a thread about the two of us." he replied calmly and Y/N widened her eyes.

"What? You're kidding!" she said and slipped between her boyfriend's arm to see the phone too, he hugged her while opening the tweet.

The compilation had photos, videos, gifs of interactions between the two in events of all kinds.

Y/N was never subtle in hiding what she felt for Chanyeol, it was no wonder he discovered the not-so-secret crush she had for him.

So the pictures of them looking at each other meant more than it should, she always smiled broadly when she saw him, it wasn't common to do that with anyone.

And a photo in particular that she never actually explained, taken by a fan with low resolution, Y/N holding her phone and her backpack at the airport, accidentally her phone had been unlocked by fingerprint and it was possible to see that her boyfriend was the wallpaper, although couldn't quite see his face the fans had found similarities.

Chanyeol was always looking for her at SM concerts, whether to bow when greeting her - even though he had seen her backstage before - or to hold her hand at the end.

At award shows, they always seemed to talk with their eyes when they were at nearby tables. And they always danced and sang louder when one was performing.

She repeatedly praised the group's songs on her social media just as he did, and although it was vague, fans took it as a sign.

The interviews where she described her ideal type, someone like him.

The similar clothing and accessories. Which in their case wasn't similar, the hoodies Y/N took were actually Chanyeol's but no one could prove it. Anyone on the internet could buy the same model and size.

"Nothing that hasn't happened to other idols." Y/N spoke after a while.

If they didn't deny it and didn't confirm it, it would just be internet theory. Right?

"Ah, but this is interesting." Chanyeol stopped at one of the tweets with a wide smile.

"Oh no."

"Oh yes!" he chuckled before reading it aloud. "Y/N bubble update: 'I'm watching Descendants of the Sun again. Oh what? How many times have I watched it? Probably like 5 lol I really like this genre. And Dr. Kang is right, girls really fantasizes about the army uniform.' You said that the day I sent you my uniform picture." Chanyeol accused and she felt her cheeks burn.

That comment had been days before official photos of Chanyeol serving it were released on the internet, another clue for fans.

"I told you that on that video call." she tapped him lightly on the chest and he laughed.

Chanyeol dropped her phone on the bed and rolled over her, resting his elbows on either side of her body and glaring at her mischievously as she brought her hands to his shoulder.

"Actually you said something a lot worse, do you want me to repeat it?" he asked, raising an eyebrow and she laughed shyly.

"It's not necessary!" he nodded and leaned down to kiss her forehead, making her sigh at the contact.

Chanyeol then kissed Y/N's nose, cheek and chin, she just laughed lightly as she caressed his shoulder.

With her eyes already closed from the previous caresses, Y/N felt her boyfriend gently place his lips on hers, it was enough to melt her completely, no matter how many times they kissed even after so much time together, she felt the same things from the beginning, as if she were that dreamy little girl.

One of Chanyeol's hands went to her face, the big warm palm caressing her skin as they kept the same slow rhythm. Y/N took the opportunity to bring a hand to the back of his neck and caress the short strands of hair.

She felt him smile between the kiss and pulled away, causing her to complain.

"Hey, baby." he spoke softly and she opened her eyes, staring at him. "Don't worry, we'll be able to hide our relationship long enough."

[...]

Chanyeol was live in his study on Instagram just over 15 minutes ago. He talked to the fans, answered questions, sang, showed some demos of songs he was working on.

All because he was bored that afternoon, his girlfriend was too busy with her own schedule and would probably be late, it was enough time to interact with the fans for a while.

A week had passed since the leaked photos of the concert they went to together and some fans were still asking about Y/N in the chat, he smiled sideways but pretended not to see.

They had agreed to hold back the relationship news for a longer time, for the sake of Y/N's group promotions, anyway the company had already released both of them to announce it whenever they wanted but Chanyeol wanted it to be special, they had been together for a long time it was true, but he wanted to take a new step with her.

He was so busy with his guitar, playing as he always did in his spare time, that he didn't hear the studio door open.

Y/N walked on tiptoe so as not to make any noise, smiling mischievously without noticing that the camera was on.

"Hi, love. I'm home." she hummed and the boyfriend turned around completely shocked, his eyes looked like they were going to pop out.

She didn't understand why he stood there with the guitar in his lap, usually he always dropped everything and ran to hug her and kiss her all over her face.

However all he did was point his head back to where the camera was and Y/N followed with her eyes, feeling her heart race when she saw her boyfriend's screen.

"Is it live?" she asked quietly and shyly as she saw the chat going crazy.

"Yes." he replied, laughing nervously.

"Huh… I'll leave then, I'll let you do what you're doing." She stuttered and a nervous laugh came out. Chanyeol chuckled, scratching his head and looked at the screen. He could even keep track of the comments because they came in so quickly. "I'm so sorry! Oh my God."

"It's okay, babe." he chuckled again and looked back to see Y/N shake her head in disbelief and she clumsily closed the door.

He took a deep breath before looking back at the camera, his eyes lowered to the comments and he chuckled at the comments. Most were freaking out over Y/N's surprise appearance, but the other half were all the same 'Are they dating??'.

"Yeah guys, I guess now you know." he shrugged, and propped his elbow on the table and put his face in his hand, moving closer to the screen to read better, and to hide his huge smile.

Chanyeol laughed when he read a comment and had to agree.

They suck at hiding lol that's what makes them perfect for each other.

Note: I just wanted to say this is the face I pictured him making when Y/N walked in the room 👇🏻 BYE

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sadistpet · 3 months

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Questions for the mun. A series of questions for the mun / the person behind the muse(s)

@gcldfanged / @valour-bound :

What caused you to start writing? What was your key point?

OH MY GOD UM im really not sure???? as far as i can remember ive always been writing

i was a freakishly verbose child ( I CALLED MY SISTER AN IMBECILE WHEN I WAS 3??? ) and very ahead in terms of reading and writing because kno. The Autism. i was reading like actually Reading adult-level encyclopedias for fun from when i was like, 3 or something so ive always been into literature and i think it just kinda spawned from there?? i was writing stories and keeping them in punched pockets, writing plays and fanfiction and stories on microsoft word, so it was something i always did afaik

if there was a key point i don't remember it, but there are some things that stick out to me; once when i was around 11?i got a pokemon fan magazine that had honest to god fanfiction in it and that was like. immense to me. like you're telling me other people write about their favourite franchises like this?? and after that i really started taking stuff more seriously in regards to how i was writing another was when i was. ??? unsure but my teacher at the time wrote on my work "remember me when you are a famous author :)" and that sticks with me to this day. she was kind of a huge bitch but that was such a genuinely moving comment and i think abt it a lot sometimes

and a lot of little things too. like being told by online friends that i was an amazing writer for my age, or my english teacher being legitimately visibly excited to talk about my writing. so yea :3

Are you happy with how your favorite canon muse was portrayed in canon?

HMMM. in terms of raikov i Think so ? but i do wish we had got more of him. and specifically more of his relationship with volgin because they're very cute together. idk if i've mentioned it here before but i theorise that their relationship was initially meant to play a larger part in mgs3, because mgs is known for having very multi-layered and complex villains, and volgin isn't really shown as one. and yeah that's likely what they were going for with a more bond-esque narrative, but the fact he's constantly portrayed as evil personified WHILE ALSO having parts that shows he genuinely loves and cares abt someone... idk. it feels like they wanted to make that more prominent to add more depth to his character but they just didn't

SO REALLY thats my only critique, i wish we had seen more of him interacting with the other characters rather than nameless npcs. i'm kind of content with him being a mostly blank slate, though -- it means i can do a lot more work on him :3

What are your biggest (personal) Tumblr crushes?

gonna do this in rp sphere only bc otherwise i think ill die of embarrassment BUT i literally have so many like oh my god if i fucking. follow you then you can assume i look up to you because WROW i follow such cool writers. my main ones if i had to choose are han (@cwarscars), hope (@viruslearnt), jason (@tacticalvalor), soda (@gcldfanged) and ryder (@zendatsu); theyre the ones i look up to the most i think :D theyre all genuinely such sweet people and terrifyingly amazing writers like hoyl fuckign shit

#I CANNTO SHUT UP GOD. BUT TYSMMM #g: ¦ ❝ answered. ❞#g: ¦ ❝ ooc. ❞

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deripmaver · 2 years

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Omg hiiii!!!

I read your fic ‘all the king’s men’. First of all, it’s amazing. I don’t think I’ve had my gut wrenched quite like that in a long time!! But importantly, you can’t leave that story there.

Please please please write a sequel!! You cannot cut Egeria’s response to the scenes, you just cannot!! It’s cruel, (on theme with the fic but still) and I need to see how it affects her in the longer run. I already she becomes Laurent, what with all the same circumstances, but I have to know how it goes for the three of them!! Does Damen become the only tolerable person for her? Does she go away to a distant palace? Does she send them away? I have to know!! And then there’s also the matter of how Laurent pays for his acts, I fully expected Damen to die in the fic, and for Laurent to pick up the pieces after, but that’s not what happened, so I have to know how Laurent pays. Please write a sequel/another chapter/epilogue (if you will)

I don’t even want to talk about Nikandros. So I won’t. But you probably already know how I’m dying to see it.

So please think about writing, I won’t forget the favour ever.

HAHAHAH AWWWW ANON THIS IS SO SWEET THANK YOU!!!! its really validating as an author to see that a fic made you feel so many emotions!!! at the moment i dont have plans for a sequel, though youre not the only person who wants one LOL. i can jot down some things ive dicussed with folks that would happen in the future imo

egeria does EVENTUALLY make up with laurent. i dont want to say she forgives him, because my ethos sort of rejects "forgiveness" as the main goal, just continual improvement, if that makes sense? i think she probably would see that laurent really makes damen happy, and defends him against ppl who think he's unfit to rule, and that he loves him geniunely. plus, laurent being laurent like in canon, he probably does stuff like impulsively rescue a bunch of slaves, and just generally shows he has morals, so egeria forms a grudging respect for him and eventually does start to like him. it's not just what laurent did to damen, but this feeling of continual violation that egeria trusted laurent with confiding about her own assault. i can also see egeria needing to go away for a while, or otherwise laurent and damen stay in delfeur/delpha while egeria stays in ios, and the separation gives them all time to think. egeria in her statemanship studies might also learn about how awful the regent was, and so she'd feel some sympathy.

i think of egeria kind of like damen as a natural born ruler. she'll have to learn how to rule in ios, since she never did growing up, and so in that sense she's pretty far behind where damen and even laurent were at her age. i picture her taking lessons with the children of the kyroi in statesmanship, languages, economics, etc, and at first the kids her age are kind of snooty about her, because she knows so little about what they know, but she's a quick learner and she's got these scrappy street smarts and is, as you said, very like laurent. i have this image of her teaching some of the pampered noble's kids to pick locks or something, and then eventually they all look to her as a leader.

she winds up as a pretty angry teenager, much like laurent. she never takes it out on damen though, and all damen has to do is pull the "im not mad just disappointed" and she turns into a blubbering apologizing mess

maybe a cop out, but since laurent genuinely acknowledges what he did was wrong and never tries to make excuses for it, most of his continued suffering is watching the toll it takes on damen and their relationship. he has to hear the way some of the kyroi doubt damen and think he's weak because of his ptsd, he hears damen wake up with nightmares and sometimes damen is too upset to let him comfort him, for a LONG time egeria makes no secret of how much she hates him... leaning more into the a/b/o dynamics, i have been chatting with ccainao3 @ ao3 (read her fic theyre amazing, love u ruth) and how damen sharing his first heat with laurent would probably be a disaster for both of them. laurent wouldnt really want to bc hes worried he'd hurt damen somehow, but he'd also be terrified that if he asked damen to stop, that would make damen think his alpha was rejecting him....... anyway he'd leave that first shared heat feeling absolutely miserable lol.

no nikandros will never ever in a million years forgive laurent LMAO. i think in canon he might, but in this au no. he also would keep like. reflexively standing in front of damen any time laurent got close, which would piss damen off.

so yes at the moment i don't have plans for a sequel, but i hope this is satisfying enough to you!! thanks again so much for your ask, have a wonderful day!!!

#my fic #capri meta #captive prince meta #captive prince #captive prince fanfic

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wymthatsillegal · 2 years

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question anon back again :)

ah okay, understandable!! i don't know i feel strange asking but this idea has been in my head for weeks and you're the only person that would do it justice.

can you do keoghan's joker with a male reader? like theyre in their arkham cells nearby and get a little chatty. joker is obviously really flirty and the reader returns it, but don't make the reader... weak if that makes sense. a firm male reader? idk

"Something about your eyes, pretty boy, let's me know you'll be lots of fun." "That right?" like that type energy

thank you so much!!! again, drink water and have a great day :)

Just Jokes

Keoghan's Joker x Male Reader

Contains: lots of laughing and variants (obviously), discussions of violence, mental illness, tall reader, reader with a sense of humor, ACAB

Content Warnings: detailed violence, potentially disturbing descriptions of said crimes, i don't shy away from them being mentally ill

Summary: You're introduced to a new wing of Arkham and find that the man in the cell next to you will certainly keep things interesting, and can't help but put a smile on your face.

No usage of Y / N

Word count: 1470

Author's Response: Fuck yeah! This was so much fun to write, and so different than my usual asks that it was really refreshing! I normally read up on other people's fics before I do mine so I get a vibe going, but there aren't very many for him, and correct me if I'm wrong but this is the first K-Joker fic where there's a male reader! I went a little ham on the reader deserving his spot in the same wing as The Joker, so bro's a little bonkers. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this, I know I certainly did writing it. Thanks! Cheers!!!

asks will be closed at 12:00pm tonight, get em in while you can >:)

You shuffled down the concrete hallway of Arkham best you could with the ankle cuffs tight around your legs, thin gaze angled towards the floor. Sighing, you realized it didn't matter where you looked since every surface was the same damn color, the metal only adding to the coldness of the stone. The most annoying part was each time you had to lean to get through each door, whoever designed this place made really short doorways. "Inmate!" The guard behind you yelled unnecessarily loud, voice echoing harshly, "Turn with your back against the wall!" To your surprise, you watched as only one or two shapes stirred from behind their windows, you'd been expecting all the cells to be full. Despite the number of rooms, you were looking at four guys, tops. You hadn't really wanted to draw attention to yourself but oh well, seems the guy next to you had you covered. "No problem, piggie." You said with a dramatic bow of your head, eyes wide with a large grin as you came up, fucking with this guy. He glared at you, moving to unlock your new door.

When he stepped forward, a fifth shape in the cell next to you that was previously behind the cop caught your eye. Peering at it, you took notice of patchy green hair and nearly melted skin, what looked to be a big bloody smile straining against his face. You felt his eyes snake all over your body, the gaze intense even from behind the door. You were oddly excited, meeting his pupils best you could in the dark, gauging where they were from the glint in them. He giggled, or at least you could've sworn, a joyous, genuinely happy sound that brought a smile to your lips out of reflex. A rough hand grabbed you by the shoulder, yanking you into your cell, unlocking your cuffs. "Have fun in Arkham, criminal." He sneered one last time, slamming the door in your face.

"Oink oink, asshole." You muttered under your breath, scanning your new room. It wasn't as bad as you were expecting, an elevated bed, a sink, a mirror. Snickering, you realized these were the long-term cells, unlike the temporary one you were in before this. Oddly enough, you had a mirror and a window near the ceiling, luxuries not given to you before. Eyeing yourself in the reflective surface you hopped up on your bed, testing its durability before taking in the outside world in all its glory. Gotham and its big, dark skies with huge weathered buildings to match stared back at you over more damn concrete walls. "You'd think they'd have a designer for a place so exclusive..." You chuckled to yourself, giving out your knees and flopping on your bed.

Once the sound of your amusement cut out, it continued in the cell next to you, light laughter echoing into your cell from small holes punctured here and there through the concrete wall. Don't know how inspection managed to miss that, but this is Gotham, after all. You eyed a hole big enough to see through, although just barely, pressed close to the corner farthest from your bed at eye-level sitting down. "Funny... am I?" You muttered amusedly, knowing the guy next to you could hear you. His laughter increased for a moment, once again bringing a wide smile to your face out of instinct, "Very," He paused for a moment as if thinking. "What's your name, handsome?" You got out of your threadbare bed, sitting on the floor, your back pressed against the wall where the big crack was. "I thought you weren't supposed to let out that kind of thing in here, never know what people'll do with that kind of information." He let out a long, low breath at that, "You're also smart... I might have to keep an eye on you." He said gleefully.

You furrowed your brows, turning slightly towards the hole with an amused smile, "Something tells me you were going to do that anyway." You noted the heavy rasp in his voice despite the high pitch of it, an odd duo that you couldn't help but want to hear more of. He also spoke breathily, as if his vocal cords were weak, you supposed the reasoning for that was the same as his appearance. You uttered your name, hearing the gasp come from the other side. "I trust you know who I am, Jokes?" He let out another long breath, " 's not every day you hear the voice of a murderer like you. Someone with such beautiful crime scenes..." He said with almost sickening affection, you imagined that if he had more of his hair the clown would be twirling it right now. "What got you in here, sweets?" He added, genuine curiosity in his voice evident.

You sighed in annoyance at recalling the story, letting your head loll back again and hit the concrete. "Too much fun 'n too many coppers. Crew got sloppy, didn't monitor an entrance..." You trailed off, assuming he knew where you were going with this, listening to his little sounds here and there to let you know he was paying close attention. "In a shoot-out, I got clipped in the back and rushed to the hospital, only for some asshole to try and kill me in my sleep." You smiled widely at the thought of the lackeys' eyes looking up at you, begging with mute lips and on deaf ears, peepers almost ready to pop out of his head as you hovered over his body, choking the life out of him with your bare hands. Coming back to the present moment and down from the slight rush you continued, "Course I didn't like that, then a doctor walked in and tried to call in more cops, so I had to knock him out..." You groaned, "Then they put me in here because I ripped a guy's tongue out in the cafeteria 'n made him eat it, saying I couldn't be around people." You smiled to yourself, "Oh, but it was fun to watch him gargle."

The green-hair man mumbled something incoherent before muffled, sick laughter rang out again in his cell, bouncing ecstatically off each surface. You could hear that he had both hands over his mouth to cover the audio of his enjoyment, sounding like he was going to pop a lung with the intensity of his fit. You joined him quietly, the infectious noise wrapping around you, making a strange home. He continued his giggling, the sounds of him shifting against the wall behind you made you curious so you turned to sit in front of the hole, looking through it with relative ease. You saw his eyes again, this time in far better detail, and you couldn't help the noise that escaped your lips in seeing him. Something about him just captured your attention and held it firmly, quite honestly you didn't know if you wanted it any different.

His unnaturally bright green irises encased bottomless black pupils, surrounded by his burned yet fair skin. Aggressive red gashes trailed from his temple to the edge of what you could see, looking like scars from a deadly battle, a circumstance you knew all too well. You realized suddenly from the deepness of his smile lines and the fact that they had been unwavering in the time you both had spent studying each other that it might have been a condition, his skin twisted into a permanent sick grin. With a shiver, you uttered, "Fascinating.", not even bothering to hide your intentions. "Something about your eyes, pretty boy," He turned his head slightly, giving you a glimpse of his puffed lips and marred teeth before he straightened again, eyes narrow, "lets me know you'll be lots of fun."

You raised an eyebrow and smiled at him, "That right? Something tells me the same about you, Joker." He raised his eyebrows at that, eyes widening briefly in recognition, "Of course, someone smart as you knows me..." You cocked an eyebrow again, "Your crime scenes aren't so bad yourself." He winked at you at that, "Aww, how sweet. You know..." He leaned forward just slightly, "I think that the two of us are going to get very, very close... I like you." He added at a whisper, like something someone shy would admit to their crush during a free period. You dramatically mulled the idea over in your head, humming and tapping your pointer finger on your lips before dropping it. "I suppose I could come to tolerate you, J." Waiting a second for comedic timing, you winked back at him.

The two guards shared eye contact outside of the entrance to the ward, wondering if they should do something about the shared boisterous and uncontained laughter coming from the closed door behind them.

#joker x male reader #the joker #jokerrrrr......#keoghan joker #the batman 2022 #batman2022 #thebatman #mlm #batman x male reader #makeup #hes just so #please im going insane #battinson #thebatmanjoker

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missdawnandherdusk · 4 years

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Ravenclaw Extensive Dating a Malfoy Headcanons:

Okay, so other than Ravenclaw and Slytherin I have two series with Draco and the other houses but they don’t always get the little moments so here I am adding them in as well as beginning the remaining houses. (Of course you all know how I feel about sorting but for the sake of Draco Malfoy being happy I’ll set that aside). Yes this has been done before but come on, you’re gonna read it anyway. I’ll do one for each house promise.

So being ravenclaw comes with the name calling “nerd” “four eyes” “freak” “weirdo” ya know real high brow stuff

Mostly it comes from Draco and his Slytherin classmates they feel threatened, you’re smart, go figure

It’s not that you’re “smart” it’s that you want to learn especially if you’re Muggle born because WHAT DO YOU MEAN MAGIC EXISTS

So you get good. Very good. At everything. Which infuriates Draco because you surpass him in Potions

He fails a Transfiguration quiz and McGonagall asks you to help him because you’re probably the only one who won’t punch him a-la-muggle

You protest but it’s no use, and McGonagall said she’ll give you extra credit and house points so, ya know what bring it

He hates it of course, sulking the entire time, muttering about “if my father knew about this” which just makes you smile because good lord he’s ridiculous

Your tutoring sessions give you time with Draco alone and though the first few times you’re terrified and stumble over your words, you get more comfortable with him and he’s less snappy at you

He has an ambition for knowledge, you have the means to give it to him

Soon he’ll start sitting next to you in class because you’re notes make more sense to him than the professor’s do

You come to realize that “oh my stars Draco might be dyslexic like you” you don’t mention it to him because you know he’d just shut down and get aggressive but it explains why he likes your notes so much: he can actually read them

People still make fun of your for your brains and knowledge, but it starts to fade over time and unbeknownst to you, Draco began to threaten anyone who bullied you; which accidentally put you on edge because you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop

You’re reading up on the American Revolution and Wizards involvement in the war when Draco comes to you, grinning

You look up at him, nervous and expecting

He hands you his latest Charms exam

He got full marks

You’re so excited you forget yourself and hug him which leads to blushing and awkward “good job” and “thanks”

One day Harry is being Harry with Draco and “she’s only helping you because she’s getting extra credit and house points” Draco knew that but hearing it from Harry is different

You go straight to McGonagall and tell her you don’t want the credit or points anymore you don’t tell draco this, because well... you don’t know

Your study session become less laughter filled and fun... Draco seems almost too distracted to focus on anything he’s moping

You reach over one time in class and draw a smiley face on his notes while he’s sulking. When he glares at you, you offer a smile and maybe he smiles back

“Are you okay?” You write under the smiley face. “Fine.” He scrawls. “I don’t believe you”

He stares at you like you have two heads. No ones ever pressed past his “I’m fine” charade before

That night you’re studying and he comes to you and starts to talk. It starts with school but it goes on to how his family is doing and the looming war and then he finally admits that he’s not as put together as he looks and that the only friend he has is being “paid” to be with him

“Draco, I stopped getting extra credit months ago,” You finally explain what you did after what Harry said that one day and he’s just dumbfounded so maybe his only friend wasn’t being paid to be with him

You introduce him to Muggle Coffee Monsters for late night studying and occasional all nighters theyre “really really really really good” he’s practically bouncing in his seat. You wonder if he’s ever had caffeine before...

You fail a potions test. Badly. Not that you meant to but you don’t know what happened. You try everything to hold back tears because you’ve never failed before. Draco gets perfect marks and you’re just dying inside and so ashamed because you’re supposed to be smart

Draco finds out even though you try to keep it from him and he chases after you in the hall not before pleading with Snape to have you redo the exam. Snape allows it

“Just leave me alone Draco,” you snap. “Just wait!” He calls. “Leave me alone!” You pull out your wand against him and he just freezes. You realize what you’ve done and run, tears streaming down your face

You don’t talk to him in class because you’re just so confused and ashamed and sorry. He slides a note over. “You’re more than a grade,” is written in his careful script. There’s a smiley face too.

You finally peek over at him and he offers you a smile now you’re really confused

You keep that note and whenever you’re stressed or get a grade less than you wanted you read it until the paper is faded and worn from its wear.

You retake the exam you take after Draco spends the week beforehand making sure you know exactly what you’re doing

“You can do this,” He insists. “No I can’t,” you groan, hopeless. “You’re being ridiculous, come on wise girl, if I can do it so can you.” The nickname started as a taunt but now it was something that only Draco was allowed to call you

You get full marks on your retake and run to find Draco and hug him in the middle of the Great Hall with everyone watching and maybe you kiss him because he believed in you when he leads to awkward blushing and stammering apologies before he pulls you back and really kisses you

There’s a chorus of “finally”s from the surrounding students and a few cheers the whole school shipped you two and it was just frustrated to watch you two pine for another

Draco leads you to a quiet corner of the castle, your exam still in your hand as he really asks you if you want this—to be with him. He knows he’s not the best person and goes on listing why he’s a bad person and yadda yadda yadda

You tell him if you’re more than a grade he’s more than a Slytherin

You start dating

Cue blushing and nervous Draco because “I’ve never had a girlfriend what am I supposed to do? Flowers? Chocolate? Dates? Handholding?” The poor boy is a mess

“Draco, sweetheart. Calm down you’re doing fine,” you laugh one afternoon as he fumbles over asking you to hogsmeade with him. “It’s just me,” he just feels so pressured to be perfect you constantly remind him that he doesn’t have to be, not for you

You still study together but sometimes you just end up cuddling. Except on the nights you have an exam the next day or an essay due “Draco I will hex you to next week if you don’t focus”

You both aren’t sure how to be affectionate towards another. Sure you’ve read books and he’s seen other do it but you two are so bad at just talking without stammering or blushing

So you start writing down how you feel and what you want to do and what you’re comfortable with, and he’ll respond and you two actually get somewhere because you’re communicating it’s not “the norm” but at least you’re communicating

Reading books under trees; late nights in the library; sitting together in class; holding hands in the halls; “wise girl” and “pretty boy”

Your friends are happy to see that your happy and can appreciate Dracos ambition for knowledge and that you both are a bit competitive when it comes to grades

His friends are a bit cold and distant and snappy sometimes, but you don’t mind much, you know it’s not a commonality for Slytherin to date outside of House

Draco spoils you at every turn. “You looked at this book in the shop so I got it signed by the author for you” / “you said you wanted this quill once... so here” / “I will never understand Muggle stores but I picked up more Oreos and Monsters” / “I saw this necklace and it reminded me of you so I bought it” / “you lost your other scarf so I got you this new one. It’s unicorn silk” / “here, this bag is enchanted so you can carry all of the books you want and not have to carry the weight”

You love him a little more with each thing he gets you because they’re the most bizarre things that you didn’t know you wanted but somehow he did. He’s like a bird “I saw this shiny rock and wanted you to have it”

Your parents adore him. They were a bit wary about you dating a Malfoy/Slytherin but he spends one afternoon and dinner with your family and they’re completely smitten and tell him to come back any time especially when they hear about getting you that retake exam

His parents are a bit more reserved towards you. Until Narcissa sees Draco smiling at you as you talk about the history of something he really couldn’t care less about but you’re so excited he can’t help but stare and she sees your wisdom and ambition and wonders if the Sorting Hat made the right call about you

Lucius doesn’t talk down to you not that he talked much at all to you but when you ask him more about his job at the ministry/his peacock/family history/possible Veela descent he’s absolutely taken with you because you remind him of a young Narcissa especially when you snip right back at Draco. Lucius chokes on his drink when he hears you call Draco “pretty boy” and Narcissa grins at him because that’s her nickname for him

When Draco takes the Dark Mark you can bet your Galleons your spending every night looking into Dark Magic and how it works to truly understand what’s happening. You feel less panicked when you know what’s going on good or bad and you help Draco understand too

Which means you’re talking to Snape a bit more. Not to use the magic, but you want to know. You don’t want Draco to feel like he’s alone in all of it. You find spells that make the Mark burn less and affect his thoughts/mood less

When Draco starts to slip behind on grades again during Sixth Year, you go back to tutoring him, with gentle encouraging words and soft promises that he can do it

After the war you encourage him to come back to school and finish and though he’s terrified to face anyone his ambition for knowledge is still there and you’ve become a lot more terrifying since learning dark magic that people back off when they see you

Tags: @coffee-addicti @msmcsmutt @ravn-87 @artemismohr18 @whygz @crazywritingbug @fuzzy-panda@bitemebro522 @zombiesnips-blog @jillanaholland @shookyungsoo @savingdraco @welcometomyworldwithoutrules @akari180 @slytherin-emerald @chaotic-good-gemini @memalfoy-spidey@theres-a-dog-outside-omg @queenfeatherwings @fanficflaneuse @go-whovian-universe @spicyshenanigans @darling-im-not-okay-i-promise@dietkiwi@katsukink @takemetothekingdom @strangerr-things@tmnt-queen @mccloudchloe @hxneybgb @justsomerandomgur @belcvayelena @moviesbooksandfandoms @howdycharlie@xtrashmouthxtozierx @cocochanelthepupper@ninacotte@mccloudchloe @braelynn-j @jiggllyy @honeymarvel@go-whovian-universe @darcypottah @atomicpunkrock@thiccheerioss @lottie289 @boredashaeck @beautiful-pegasus @tceedlmao @deadlynyghtshayde @iconjuresnapeingrandmaclothes @anonymous034 @bi-andready-tocry @lunna-does-real-doodle @dragonsandbread @atomicwonderlandmentality @okaydraco @the–queen-of-hell @langdonzvoid @cmxreader @alienmotel @oh-itsnothing @tulippings @thestressedprincess @sunflowerxsadnessw @caps-wilsonn @fattycooter @angelotakunerd08 @thisisahugemistake @fanficsigottaread @gweaslvy @okaydraco @strawberriesonsummer @ughjjloveme @honeymarvel @gaysludge @cleopatera

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fellhellion · 3 years

Note

can you make a rec list of your favorite fe3h fics? if that's alright?

OF COURSE I WOULD LOVE TO <3 always happy to give my fave works a shoutout <33333

Though mind u this is going to be a LOT so ill pop them under a cut

from the heart in exile

TLDR: platonic hubert edelgard fic that haunts me. It’s extremely good with really well written character voices and focuses on these two characters trying to find out who they are beyond the war with their friends refusing to leave them behind

Summary:

You can’t speak just yet to whether time—and age? experience? not that war or rulership have given you much of the latter, at least in the area of gardening—has made your thumbs any less brown, but the house in the Oghma Mountains is surrounded by so many growing things it hardly seems to matter. It sits at the edge of a forest, on the gentle lower slopes, and the people in the nearest town had all smiled to speak of it when they pointed the way for Hubert, the day you arrived. A number of them were old enough to remember what it had been like, years ago, in the warm and golden before, and to insist that it had not changed in the ways that mattered. It was still full of light. The air still smelled green.

In which Edelgard keeps a garden, Hubert learns to fly, and those they leave behind refuse to be left behind.

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Watchtower

TLDR: platonic fic and amazing sylvain character study. Like genuinely one of the best i’ve ever read. If you’re someone who really wanted a deeper exploration of Sylvain’s feelings about Dimitri this fic is for u.

Summary:

When Sylvain is six and a half and climbs to the top of a tower with no one’s hand in his, he realizes that each and every one of the people he loves has been born as a gift to something else. Dimitri was born for Faerghus, and Felix was born for Dimitri. Glenn was born for the royal family, and Ingrid was born for Galatea and for Glenn. He realizes, too, that what they’re for decides their future. Dimitri will lead them into a better world. Felix will guide his path, and Glenn will protect his life, and Ingrid will bind her future to theirs.

And Sylvain, who was born for the border, will stand in a watchtower. He will see the enemy before it comes, and he will keep Dimitri and Felix and Ingrid and Glenn safe.

Dimitri reappears after five years. Sylvain knows it's his role to fix the mess they're in, but he doesn't know how.

-------------------------------------------

little light

TLDR: really good exploration of flayn and seteth’s relationship (+ with his wife and flayn’s mother) pre canon (also post canon if i remember right) just a really good if heartbreaking family fic

Summary:

"She is beautiful, and she is perfect. It is foolish to say so, because the goddess herself says perfect beings cannot exist - but Cichol knows now she must have been wrong, because his daughter is perfect. They name her Cethleann. In the old tongue, it means 'light.'"

Cichol, Cethleann, what they lost, and who they became.

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conjure the wind, ease my mind

TLDR: this author in general writes FANTASTIC work so pls check out their whole repertoire. a platonic fic between holst and claude w an exploration of claude’s past that’s just so good....found brotherhood i am WEEPING

Summary:

“I’d like to know what’s wrong. I’d like to help if I can.”

Calculating green eyes lock onto Holst’s own, but this time they’re laced with something a little bit like resignation

Many people call Duke Riegan a liar, but Holst feels like he knows the young man a bit better than that. To call him a liar is wrong, you see, because all Claude has ever really done is master the art of giving up as little of the truth as possible. He keeps truth close, treats it like a valuable commodity.

“I have three brothers,” he says. “Half-brothers.”

***

Claude won’t spar with Holst and Holst wants to know why.

----------------------------------------------

my fellow passerine

TLDR: same author as before and just...god this fic is so good. a platonic exploration of the relationship between Claude and Cyril. This fic has it all: found brotherhood, worldbuilding about Almyra, Claude character study, CYRIL character study. it’s just fantastic

Summary:

Then the Alliance delegation shows up, and their offering strolls through the gates of the monastery like he already owns the place.

A reminder, for those who need it: Cyril is not an idiot. He has good eyes and he uses them.

An observation, for those who want it: The Golden Deer house leader is Almyran.

Cyril knows a lot more than he lets on, Claude is far less covert than he thinks he is, and messing with the guy your parents told you was a possibly-unkillable demon-prince isn’t usually supposed to earn you a lasting friendship but hey… life is already pretty damn weird.

-----------------------------------------

Autotomy

TLDR: god this ferdibert fic just fucking...destroys me. i cannot get through it without crying at least twice and usually more. it’s basically a CF canon divergence with a heavy HEAVY exploration of ferdinand and hubert’s perspectives towards usefulness and how abelist thinking affects that in their efforts to find Shambala after Ferdinand loses his sight from one of Hubert’s experimental spells. All while falling in love. this fic is VERY fucking heavy, please mind the tags, it’s amazing but it’s subject matter is something you need to be very aware of. Also i would highly reccomend reading the prequel to this fic as it provides some critical context to Hubert’s actions that you don’t get through Ferdinand’s flawed pov. Basically this author is a master of character perspective.

Summary:

Ferdinand von Aegir's war record ends in 1182. The war does not.

Or, blind man's bluff.

---------------------------------------------

Coming of Age

TLDR: same author as before and god...just my FAVOURITE ferdinand character study. Takes place within the period Byleth is away. I don’t want to spoil anything but it’s incredible. Mines the fantastic character drama hook between Edelgard and Ferdinand that canon DIDNT rip

Summary:

Ferdinand was a general. In theory. Edelgard had promised him continued command of his battalion, and a general needed a certain measure of wealth to supply his horses, his servants, his armor and rations and lodgings and, she’d promised.

But his father sat rotting in a cell, or worse, and it could be nothing more than a fable they thought him simple enough to believe. What did promises matter?

When the house of Aegir collapses around him, Ferdinand struggles to forge a path forward. He quickly discovers he can't manage it alone -- and neither, perhaps, can Edelgard.

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Another Life

TLDR: same author AGAIN (can u tell theyre my favourite fjsdhfk). Ferdibert fic, a man loving his partner and trying to figure out the best way to support them as they silently wrestle with questions about their gender identity is something that can be so PERSONAL and make u CRY god. also dark flier hubert my beloved.

Summary:

Ferdinand notices things. He cannot say what he notices, precisely, because he has no one to ask, and if he were to ask Hubert it would damn well result in every questioned moment up and vanishing forever behind a new wall of prickly austerity. Ferdinand cannot risk that. The things that he notices stick in his chest, and he thinks only, but.

Hubert wrestles with unasked questions; Ferdinand wrestles with a pegasus.

---------------------------------------------

Beneath the Sheets of Paper Lies My Truth

TLDR: Dimilix fic in my FAVOURITE fucking format of secondary in game historical sources exploring their relationship in retrospective.

Summary:

It was said that Duke Fraldarius’s grief at King Dimitri’s death was more potent than even the queen’s—but said by whom, and how, and why?

-----------------------------------------

A Fair Day’s Work

TLDR: Post CF Canon ferdibert where Hubert and Ferdinand’s overworked aides desperately try to get them together so they’ll be too busy being uhhhh AMOUROUS to give them so much work. Very much a romantic comedy with very fun OCs as our protags.

Summary:

“I may have some coffee in the place for you,” said Prime Minister Aegir. “Let me show you how much better I have become at brewing it to your taste.”

“If you insist,” said Minister Vestra but he sounded pleased. To Delarivier, who had literally made it her profession to attune herself to his tone (usually ranging from sort-of-murder-y to extremely-murder-y), Minister Vestra sounded very pleased indeed.

Ferdinand and Hubert's long-suffering aides figure out a way to work fewer hours.

----------------------------------------

Roost

TLDR: Dimilix post AM Canon with some pre canon moments. Basically an exploration of the complexity of their relationship with bird symbolism and extra Holy Kingdom lore. Gifting ur lover a vulture is something that can be so personal fksdhfsjkd

Summary:

Dimitri makes an affirmative noise. Then he takes a breath, voice leveling out into what Felix had long ago dubbed his 'future king voice', all steady explanation: “Long ago, the saying fledged right along with the nobles' and royal family's love of hawking, and it has remained a common phrase from one generation to the next. As adviser to the king, the duke is meant to be regal and strong, even deadly when required, from his place at the king's side. To always act as the most piercing, watchful eyes over the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus and her sovereign."

He looks over to Felix as soon as his mouth snaps shut on the final word, as always seeking approval on his recitations.

Felix tilts his head, trying to look unimpressed. “I like eagles.”

A hand automatically comes up to cover the lower half of Dimitri's face, muffling the inarticulate sound of a snort of amusement. “That is good, since you are to be mine.”

***

They say an eagle watches over Fhirdiad.

------------------------------------------------------------

A faint and faraway sound

TLDR: Ferdibert with an excellent Hubert centric character study....just so good...makes me warm and fuzzy...the mutual pining and ROMANCE of it all

Summary:

Hubert learns to be a person, with a lot of help and complication along the way.

------------------------------------------------------

In golden light

TLDR: A really REALLY good ferdibert fic with ferdinand centric pov that focuses on him reflecting on his life as he prepares the Aegir house to become a boarding school. Ferdinand sibling exploration is ABOUND here and it’s great

Summary:

When his family's summer home at Lake Aegir is set to be converted to a boarding academy, Ferdinand pays it one last visit and contemplates his complicated relationship with family, love, and legacy.

-------------------------------------------

one three four three four zero

TLDR: the fic that actually got me into dimilix. VERY heavy character study and you NEED to mind both the general fic tags and the content warnings the author lists for each chapter but it’s incredible. Takes a very familiar trope and just. slams you in the face with over 60k words of amazing character study.

Summary:

“How are you going to get the One-Eyed Demon of Garreg Mach, the Boar Prince of Faerghus, smuggled past Dukedom soldiers? What plan could you possibly have to get a creature that incapable of even pretending it isn’t a bloodthirsty beast into Dominic without getting caught?”

The Professor gives him one of their steady, unreadable stares. They definitely do not and could not possibly have answered him, “You’re going to pretend to be married to him.”

or, How to Pretend to be Married When One of You Can't Stop Hallucinating and the Other One Uses Hostility to Cope

#Anonymous #ask games #anon #this is so long SORRY LMAO

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drangues · 3 years

Note

ansbwjjcnw I still gotta read it but my motivation to Do New Shit is. So very low right now. All I want are naps. BUT I’m sure an art of Tangled!Dazatsu from you would look really nice, if you decide to draw it! ALSO GOOD LUCK ON YOUR TEST IM ROOTING FOR YOU, make sure you get enough sleep and eat something filling!!! Anyways, let’s be honest- Dazai and Chuuya only get worse when their attention flustered their boyfriends. (Nyanon, 1/7)

This is because (A) they think Flustered BFs are fucking adorable, and also (B) they know this means that their boyfriends haven’t been appreciated much and that means War (on their low self image). Also I love the implication that rich kid!Dazai and Chuuya’s natural reaction to being Pissed at each other is to spoil Atsushi or Akutagawa. It’s great. And! That is: EXACTLY. What I’m saying. (Nyanon, 2/7)

I can imagine them as that one post of the writer and the artist throwing chapters and pictures at each other, ahaha. Dazai practically being the embodiment of a chaotic author is Very Fitting, he writes when he writes and in whatever genre strikes him. No, there’s no need to worry about him, he’s definitely not living on coffee and spite alone. And Atsushi is definitely the type to mostly stick to fluffy drawing, I think! (Nyanon, 3/7)

He can definitely do other things, but he probably finds drawing cute stuff comforting. Also Kyouka likes the super cute ones and he’s pretty much willing to draw whatever to keep the baby sis happy. I also imagine that he’d do commissions? Because it never hurts to have an additional source of income. Except he’s a pushover when people tell him his prices are “too high” or something, so Kyouka has to put her foot down and tell him to Not give in, haha. (Nyanon, 4/7)

(It’s okay Dazai, I’m an attention whore to. I want to be complimented too much.) And! Poor Atsushi, haha, he probably wasn’t expecting his favorite author to say he liked his art? He probably keysmashes and then draws a cute little doodle for another one of Dazai’s fics and then Dazai is just. Gone. Also ten bucks says that their first DM interaction is Dazai saying something memey. It just feels like something he’d do. (Nyanon, 5/7)

And a bonus: Kyouka does really deep analyses of different shows and books and games, and occasionally on fanfiction as well. Kunikida makes a comprehensive, huuuge post on the lore Igor different series because I feel like he’d enjoy doing something like that? Just like, organizing the background and making it more understandable, if that makes sense? I’m not sure what Chuuya would but I get the distinct sense of someone who makes edits and aesthetics from Akutagawa. (Nyanon, 6/7)

Yosano and Ranpo both probably have that weird “list of questionable shit the authors need answers to” blog or something... I’m in too deep. Help. But! Have another Concept: Faking dating jealousy cliche, with Dazatsu and Chuuaku. Basically, Chuuya decides that he and Atsushi should pretend to be a couple to see if it’ll get their crushes attention. Cue confusion and jealousy from Dazai and Akutagawa, who may or may not have realized their own feelings. (Nyanon, 7/7)

dude dont worry i was joking there no pressure!! and felt. right now im so sleep deprived and studying for a test and i have oTHER ASSIGNMENTS TO DO- its all draining, and i mainly feel bad because i havent posted any art, but i do know that fandom is not a job but a hobby and its okay that i take my time

also kyouka being his number one supporter is just!! so!! cute!!! in my opinion kyouka would be that very young but hella good with technology in the fandom like, she would make gifs and edits in an INSTANT and when everyone learns shes fourteen theyre like W H A T?? either way, shes the one who probably shows atsushi the ropes of digital art and has the vibes of that young tech person in a show that definitely can hack into any government files. (as a joke she would most definitelly do an edit of “dazai” except its just screenshots of his fics and some lines here and there with some dramatic effects and sexy music. atsushi wont admit that he has it downloaded)

dazais way to start a conversation is definitely sending a random meme to get it going, since atsushi would be too shy to initiate conversations

also kyouka doing deep analysises is so her!! she would probably even start a youtube channel where she explains everything in that robot voice and funny editing but no one can lie that all her videos are very in depth.

OH GOD KUNIKIDA IS THE TYPE TO GATHER ALL THE FACTS OF A SHOW, POST ABOUT IT. EXPLAIN THE MAGIC SYSTEM FOR ANYONE THATS CONFUSED. IF THERES AN ANIME WITH A CONFUSING PLOT THAT YOU DONT KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN?? KUNIKIDA IS YOUR MAN. HE CAN EXPLAIN ALL OF JOJO SEAMLESSLY AND DOES MANY REVIEWS ON ANIMES AND GATHERS ALL SORTS OF LORES MEANWHILE YOSANO AND RANPO ARE THE MORE CRACKHEADED ANALYSTS (when the three collab its just kunikida trying to be serious while yosano and ranpo do the fuckboy lip bite behind him and then throw in jokes and “author if you do not explain why these two characters are a little too fruity ill personally use my chainsaw on you” “why are these two siblings even together, wHY ARE THEY IN THE SAME BED-”)

dude. i feel like chuuya and atsushi would fake date and it would be for akutagawa. atsushi definitely wants to tell dazai about this but chuuya is afraid dazai will run his dumb mouth, plus when they “announce” it chuuya just Sees how dazais demeanor changes and is like “you know what,,lets keep this up” (either way akutagawa would end up crying like a loser in front of chuuya and chuuya would feel so bad for even fake dating to make him jealous meanwhile dazai is just mad that he couldnt have internalised his feelings and bottle them up “you just H A D to date the slug, my biggest pet peeve!!! if it was anyone else i wouldve MAYBE let it sLIDE-”)

#anon #ask #ask anon #anon ask #nyanon #nyatsushi anon #bsd

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kingjasnah · 4 years

Text

actually. actually let’s talk about diversity in fantasy let’s give that a go. im mad and im gonna be that way for a while

don’t want to read all this? fair. tldr: fantasy writers who rely not only on the medieval europe model but also hide behind historical accuracy in 2020 (fuck it, from ‘95 onwards) are lazy and unimaginative and should be held accountable no matter how many white 20 year old dudes jerk off to whatever power fantasy is embedded in the plot. so lets chat about that lads. (slightly) drunk rant under the cut

now prelim shit: we know fantasy is used both as escapism and as a way to deal with various traumas via magical metaphor. staples of the genre. even if jk rowling busted out the laziest and at times offensive metaphor for ww2 and racism ive ever seen, she still adhered to time and true tropes. whatever.

so why have we, in this post game of thrones era, become insanely obsessed with realism? i can hear sixty 20-something year old men crying at me rn like oh ohh oh its based off the war of roses oh wahh all medieval fantasy fiction is based off england and the crusades anyway so women should get raped and people of color should be demonized its not racism its xenophobia and also gay people dont exist and disabled people are systematically killed off and if we stretch the magic fixes mental illness thing a LITTLE further we have straight up eugenics.

we all know where the england but myth thing came from. now the thing about tolkien is that while i will always absolutely love lotr, looking at the LAZY state of fantasy? damn i kinda wish he hadn’t revolutionized the genre. the bitch was still racist. he still didnt give a shit abt women (eowyn was just a vehicle to show how much he fucking hated macbeth anyone holding jrrt up as a feminist icon for that needs to sit the fuck down and explain to me why i can count the woman speaking roles in lotr, a story with a name and fleshed out backstory for every minor character, on one hand but thats! another post). he had something to say abt class with sam i’ll give him that but he is still 100% NOT what we need to hold our standards to in 2020.

i dont want to talk about old school fantasy, like 80s early 90s cause theres literally no point. its sexist, racist, ableist for sure, this we know. david eddings (not even that old school tbh) can rise from the grave and explain himself to me personally and i still wont forgive him for ehlana.

so let’s talk historical accuracy. quick question. who the FUCK gives a shit? WHO is this elusive got fan who’s out here like blehh actually??? this method of iron production is TOTALLY anachronistic of the time. ummm these vegetables in this fictional world were NOT native to english soil so how are they here? cause i know this is the classic argument but ive never actually met someone who cared about the lack of dysentery as much as they care abt the women getting raped on screen/page.

god forbid you have to worldbuild for a second god forbid you can’t rely on the idea of fantasy readers already have in their head god forbid you have an original idea god forbid you spend more than two seconds thinking about ur setting (oh i should mention i dont....really blame GoT for its setting cause of how long ago it was og written but trust me i sure as hell blame grrm for writing a 13 yr old giving ‘consent’ to sex with a grown man within the first couple of chapters)

If we accept the basic premise of fantasy as escapism, and i AM drunk so i will NOT be finding fuckin. quotes and shit for this but come on tolkien said it himself and as much as i’ll drag him he crafted the simplest and most powerful fantasy metaphors on the board rn. But if we know its escapism. If we know. then who is it escapism for? certainly not for me, the gay brown woman who busted through all of GoT in 10th grade.

modern fantasy lit used as an excuse for that white male power fantasy is literally disgusting. calling historical accuracy is so fucking dumb ESPECIALLY cause we, as ppl in the 21st century, KNOW women have been consistently written out of the story. poc ppl, gay and trans ppl, anyone with a god forbid disability has been WRITTEN out of history as we know it, INCLUDING the fucking war of the roses so HOW can we hold up testimony we know is flawed to support our FICTIONAL. STORY. just to??? support the white power fantasy?? literally noah fence but if you are a white guy who felt really empowered by every time jim butcher described a woman tell me: how do you think that’ll hold up in classic HisToRiCaL fantasy. you think thats a fucking noble pursuit? or are you grima wormtongue out here.

(side note: jim butcher stop writing challenge i dont need to know abt every woman on page’s nipples. anyone who hides behind subgenre like that? ‘ohhh its a noir story thats why hes sexualizing everyone’ shut the fuck up an author isnt possessed by a fuckin muse and compelled to bust out 500k they have agency and they have choice and they MADE the choice to reserve said will for none of their female characters)

which brings me to point 2: target audience and BOY is the alcohol hitting me rn but WHO is this for? this isnt the fucking 80s we know poc and other marginalized folk read fantasy FOR the escapism. on god ive had a cosmere focused blog for nearly three years and. im just gonna say it im interacted with A LOT of yall and ive managed to talk to VERY few white straight ppl as compared to everyone else.

like....who deserves to see the metaphor on homophobia or racism. joanne rowling? the bitch who literally tried to sell us happy slaves and the disgusting aids metaphor and the worst case of antisemitic stereotypes i ever saw in an nyt bestseller? yall think that was for US? or was it for the white guilt crowd.

literally white people can find any book about them that they can relate to. but hmmm maybe theres a reason gay women care so much about stormlight archive’s jasnah kholin, a brown woman who’s heavily coded as wlw. or kaladin, the FIRST fantasy protag ive ever seen with clinical depression. hmm i wonder why a bunch of millennials are vibing all of a sudden. im not saying sanderson is perfect--but its the best ive seen from a white author tbh

maybe theres a reason a lot of poc vibe with a literary way to express trauma, and maybe thats why i specifically get so pissed when its not done well. theres a REASON books about outcasts pushing through and claiming their own lives are popular with people who arent white and straight and able bodied. Junot Diaz had a point. maybe lets STOP catering to those assholes who think theyre joseph campbell’s wet dream personified. ive lost respect SO many authors who are objectively talented. pat rothfuss can write so beautifully that ive cried to bits of name of the wind but literally i will never pick that series up again (not just because of the felurian. women in general tbh. mostly the felurian ngl) cause 1) i personally KNEW men whod jerk off to that shit and 2) there was no need for it there was no plot reason for ANY of that shit

so like obviously thers an issue with authors of color specifically not getting recognized for fantasy and genre work but on god??????? im still mostly mad at the legions of white authors churning out the same medieval england chosen one books year after fucking year. have an original thought maybe. also im sorry that you as an author lack the basic empathy needed to examine the way that women? or any group of people that youre explicitly writing about see the world and would specifically see YOUR made up world.

yes your fantasy should be diverse, but more than that it should be kind. if you as a writer cant respect groups of people who deserve it....what the hell are you doing in a genre that traditionally is about finding ways to express injustice through metaphor? tolkien’s hero was sam. fantasy was NEVER about the privileged. yall know who you are so stop acting so fucking entitled. peace out.

#disclaimer ive had a bit to drink. and instead of getting ridiculously emotional like normal and plud in a trek movie #im mad! surprise shes mad now. not at BS specifically dont worry this is still a cosmere stan zone but im mad and im gonna talk about it #if no one reads this ur valid but if you do im gonna be mad or another two hours before i force myself to #man idk feel free to talk tho #this is so stupid im sorry i got so heated i plugged in the BoP soundtrack #and like just #well youll see

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midasgutz · 3 years

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elfen lied manga was such a fuckin trip. did i dream that shit up ? who allowed the dude who made that to just write all that shit??

i need to talk about elfen lied because this shit has been living rent free in my head for over an actual decade. significantly longer than a decade.

im glad that i can now accept that media i consume doesnt necessarily say anything about me, because. jesus, every inch of elfen lied is a war crime. every panel.

the coolest character who was generic tough military dude, who right when you meet him makes a point of punching a secretary just for standing behind him. and then goes out to find and kill a 17 year old with abandonment issues. and gets his shit kicked in and his arm ripped off and his eyes plucked out. and so, naturally, he trades his testicles for some dope robot eyes. for the sake of all humanity. oh and a really mediocre robot arm that he can actually break if he puts too much force into like anything. and so naturally he then finds a 14 year old homeless girl, who helped him while he was bleeding out on the beach. and of course he beats her up and, possibly kicks her dog. and then he gives her his number. uh, so he can come help her if anyone tries to... beat her up? because he cant owe her anything. and then she says something he doesnt like so he beats her up again and she shows him the paper he wrote his number on and says "someone scary is screwing with me". he storms off after that but doesnt take the paper, he still owes her. he makes good on it too, she gets in some bad trouble with a bad bad dude later. a bad bad dude with a trenchcoat whos basically just a vampire hunter, crossbow included but actually he's here to hunt teenage girls with horns, not fangs. the crossbow shoots hard metal balls with velcro spikes that have a toxin on them that causes excrutiating pain. this guys a bad bad dude, and he miiiiiight be suggesting he's gonna rape this 14 year old girl but it could be the unfairthful translation causing confusion. probably not tho the author of this series is majorly fucked in the head. anyway robocop shows up and he puts his boot right down this dudes throat so thats like whatever. that panel was my desktop wallpaper for like 6 years. we find out that 17 year old girl is evil because some kids killed her dog with a vase. so she blew them up, and after that she goes around blowing people up just to eat the food in their fridge and hang around the crib for a minute. so shes framed as the good guy and robocop is evil this time and they fight again and she does kill robocop this time which sucks because theres a good portion of manga left and no one else is as interesting as he is. he dies on the beach where he lost his eyes and his arm and lets be honest he basically lost his balls at the same time.

oh. and theres a girl who does peepee in her diaper a lot. and she can sing. i dont know why she was there but i mean every other fetish the author had already made a fucking appearance so why not lmao

theres also like. some main characters. theyre complete shit. these include a normal boy. his cousin who is the most annoying character in the fucking world. she is literally just "im only here to pad the amount of love interests our generic main character can have all at once" the character. yeah man, his cousin? cause shit why not. why not, its japan, do as the romans do. also theres the alternate personality of the 17 year old. shes only here so that evil 17 year old girl can be a love interest not once but twice, and i mean, conveniently shes often naked. makes sense, when the only word you can say is "milk".

and then there's Nana. Nana is a quad amputee after evil 17 year old girl ripped all her limbs off and almost finished her off. but dont worry! her dad, whos not her dad at all, finds her and he gives her some prosthetics that she can control with her super powers. what do you mean you werent aware of the super powers? of course they have super powers. its manga. after he does this he just lets her loose with a bunch of money and his tie because she asked very politely for the dangly thing he wears on his neck. she wears it like a headband, even though she established she knew it went around his neck. so yeah he gave her money but she was raised in a lab like a rat so she has no clue what its for. she meets the 14 year old homeless girl and they have a fun time being homeless together. Nana burns the money in a fire to keep warm but only some of it because the 14 year old girl tells her that you can trade money for food, which makes nana very happy because boy did she want some of the 99 cent street vendor food earlier. no one acknowledges that nana has enough money to buy her own house and be well off for easily 5 years. 14 year old girl takes her to the main character house that shes been staying at for a while and they have a bath. nana hated this idea until she realized that bath doesnt mean bucket of cold water at her new sort of house. but uh oh, nana senses evil 17 year old and shes kinda pissed about her arms and legs. they almost do a fight but wait whats this? 17 year old isnt fighting back, she just keeps saying "milk" and smiling. nana takes some issue with this and promptly leaves after pushing her through a rice paper door. shortly after everyone goes looking for nana.

um some stuff happens and then whaaaattt??? nanas not dads real daughter is introduced. shes locked in a circular room lined with lead and chloride of lime. with a diameter of 15 meters, the length of her invisible hands. shes only ever had the voice of a single woman to comfort her, shes permanently lockdd in bondage gear unable to move. she has to use a wheelchair to move because her legs have completely atrophied. she moves it with her invisible hands, her real ones are useless. she calls the only voice she knows her mother. her mothers job has been to talk to and comfort this dangerous girl for years. said mother mentions her excitement to finally see the girl in person, and also casually drops how theyve sewn bombs into several parts of her body. conveniently, if shes in intense pain her powers dont work. so she meets her mom, takes one look at her and says "youre not my mom >:(" and sends her entire upper torso flying. conveniently said torso lands near the bomb controls. she slams that shit like shes a rat with an orgasm button and babygirls arm go bye bye. they inform her while she writhes in pain that she has to comply with their demands or they can blow her whole deal up next time. shes pretty ok with being blown up, but then they tell her they want her to kill something so her ears perk up like a cat hearing a can opener. yep shes going to go kill evil 17 year old. nanas not dad is not taking any of this well but he essentially gets mindbroken after he has to blow up his daughter later after shit flies off the handle. he spends his time as a homeless man, denoted by the sudden appeaeance of a large beard, living in a shack on the beach where robocop died. he does note the beach is incredibly clean and that is because robocop picked up allllllll the trash so that evil 17 year old couldnt throw it at him. he did totally eat shit anyway though no worries. im not bitter about it why should you be? im not.

anyway shit happens and 17 year old melts into a really graphic puddle of fleshy goo, and in doing so totally does the jesus thing. because at some point she realized she really just wanted to be with main character, but all of the things shes done makes that impossible.

i was like maybe 12 when i read this shit. i didnt reread it for this. im pretty sure most of this is accurate but i CAN and WILL promise you one thing. diaper girl is real, and he REALLY really really really 100% did trade his balls for robot eyes, and a playdough robot arm.

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dirtydobrik · 5 years

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getaway - d.d.

plot: you’ve been secretly dating david for a couple months, keeping your relationship a secret from everyone including your friends, and one day you go on a “business trip”/beach vacation to spend time together and a fan sees you out together and shares pictures, essentially outing your relationship

requested: yes, by anon! Reader going on a business trip and being in a secret relationship with david and its like that episode of friends were monica and chandler are hiding their relationship and they go on a “business” trip but its only to spend time together and thats how their friends find out theyre dating.. if that makes sense :) lol

author’s note: hi! i’ve been writing a lot of sad/angst fics lately so here’s another fluff piece. this was requested anonymously so hopefully it was something similar to what you wanted. if you want to send in a request for an imagine, send me a message! (i have been so behind on requests lately but i am trying to get caught up, so i’m trying to post 1-2 times a day so people don’t have to wait ages for me to write their requests)

this picture just radiates boyfriend vibes i’m in love

word count: 1695

masterlist

"Babe, can we please go on a vacation," you begged. You were tired of being cooped up in LA, hidden from the world. You had to sneak over to David's late at night just to spend time with him since none of your friends knew you were together yet.

"How are we supposed to get away from our friends from an entire week?" he questioned, and you sighed. The idea seemed impossible.

"What about just a couple days?"

"I'll see what I can do," David answered and you grinned. You two were in desperate need of some serious alone time. The hardest part of planning this trip would be figuring out how to hide it from your friends.

A few days later David dropped two planes into your lap while you were sitting on the couch in his living room and your eyes widened. They were for a trip to North Carolina from Tuesday to Friday.

"A beach vacation?" you asked, a huge smile on your face. David nodded, and you gave him a hug.

"I'm going to tell everyone that I need to go to New York to go over some things with my publicist and you can say you have to go on a business trip for work. I think that should work."

"It's a perfect plan," you agreed, mentally reminding yourself to take the days off from work.

Tuesday afternoon, you were on your way to the airport. Natalie was dropping you both off, and although she knew you two had something going on, she didn’t think anything of it. You went checked in and went through security, settling into a seat and waiting for your flight. David had a baseball cap on and his hood up so people wouldn’t recognize him.

Seven hours after boarding, you touched down in North Carolina. You got to your AirBnB, a small house right on the water and you couldn’t stop smiling.

"I can’t believe we're here!" you exclaimed gleefully. You were bouncing off the walls with excitement to just have time to enjoy being David.

Wednesday morning you woke up next to David, and he begged you to not get up yet. You rolled over, draping your arm over his chest and leaning up to kiss him.

"Good morning," you grinned, still not over the fact that you were on vacation and alone for the first time since you started dating two months ago.

"Hi, baby," he smiled, kissing your forehead. "What do you want to do today?"

"Anything, everything," you sighed, running your fingers through his hair. You were just excited to spend uninterrupted time with your boyfriend.

"How does breakfast sound?"

After finally getting out of bed and getting ready for the day, you were walking hand in hand to a small café down the street from where you were staying. You sat at a table outside and you thanked god that Carly and Erin had gotten David hooked on coffee since you both needed some type of caffeine. You snapped a photo of him with his coffee, having to stop yourself from posting it.

You were almost in the clear during your outing, until David was recognized while paying the bill.

"Oh my God! You're David Dobrik!" a voice shrieked form inside the café. "Can I get a picture? I'm a huge fan," she asked, and when David agreed, you feared your cover would be blown. You pushed your hat down to cover most of your face and looked down in case she knew who you were too.

"Thank you so much!" she exclaimed, giving David a hug before leaving.

Once the girl was far enough away, David came back outside and sat down with you.

"That was close," he sighed.

"Maybe it's a sign that we shouldn't leave the house," you giggled. "No one will find us if we hide out."

You two decided to lay out on the beach, leaving your phones inside, which turned out to be a bad idea. When you went back inside a couple hours later, your phones were blowing up.

"Shit," David muttered, scrolling through his texts. He had gotten sent pictures of you and him walking together and some of you at the café.

"Babe, this is not good," you groaned. You felt like this was your fault. You had just wanted a few days alone with him and now everyone knew you were on vacation together. You both didn’t want to face your friends, having no clue how they would react, and judging by the texts in the group chat, they weren't too pleased.

David was pacing around the kitchen as he talked on the phone with his publicist asking what, if anything, he should do. Your phone continued to ring but you didn't want to answer.

"I'm sorry," you whispered, when David rejoined you in the living room.

"Hey, no. This is not your fault, babe."

"I wanted to go on a getaway, so yes, it is."

"Don't be so hard on yourself. This easily could've happened in LA," he tried to reassure you.

"But people would expect to see us in LA, since that's where we live. The two of us being alone in North Carolina is unexpected and people are going to make a big deal about it and it's my fault," you rambled, David interrupting you by kissing you.

"Look, I love you, and yeah, it's partly your fault, but that doesn't matter. People know we're dating, how it happened doesn’t matter. We need to figure out what to do next."

"Okay, so what do you want to do?" you asked, looking him in the eye. This was a decision for David to make, since he was the one in the public eye.

"I think the only right thing to do is tell people that we're dating. Our friends are already pissed that we hid it from them for two months, we might as well just announce it to everyone," he shrugged, and you nodded in agreement.

David shared an post introducing you as his girlfriend across all of his social media platforms, and you didn’t feel anxious like you thought you would've.

"Sorry we had to announce it so soon," he frowned, feeling bad that you were now going to be the focus of most of his interviews and that you were going to be publicly thrown into the public eye.

"It's okay, Dave. I'm more worried for how our friends will react when we go home, though," you admitted, breaking eye contact and looking down.

"They already know and love you, so there's nothing to worry about, I promise."

You felt David's arms pull you into a tight hug and you let out a long exhale, relieved that he had handled the situation with such grace and ease.

For the rest of the trip, you were able to go out and about, not having to worry about hiding from fans that you might run into. But you were still dreading going back to LA and talking to your friends.

You had texted a few of the girls, giving them all of the details they were begging for, and none of them seemed upset that you didn't tell them ahead of time. They understood the difficulties of dating within the friend group and wanting privacy, although most people tried to keep their relationships a secret from David so he wouldn't exploit them on the vlog.

You and David landed in LA on Friday night with Natalie there to pick you up.

"I should've known something was up when you didn't bring Jason or me with you on your fake trip to New York," Natalie laughed when David opened the door to the passenger seat and slid in.

"Yeah, I'm surprised you and Jason didn't question it. Like I knew no one else would've, but I expected questions from you and Jase," David chuckled.

"Jason said he's known about you two for a month, or at least that's what he's telling everyone."

You racked your brain trying to think of how or when Jason could've found out, but couldn’t think of anything.

Back at David's, your friends were awaiting your arrival, with a list of questions they wanted answers to, starting with why you would pick David when you could've gone for literally any other guy in the entire world.

"I knew something was up when you two had to go to New York together on the same day for the exact same length of time," Carly insisted.

"I knew something was going on when no one else got an invite to New York, not even Jeff, and he's from there," Zane added.

"I knew something was up when David wanted to record the podcast on Monday night when usually he'd have me come out if he had to travel to record the podcast," Jason said.

“Yeah, I knew something was wrong when neither of you posted about going to or being in New York,” Erin piped in.

"Okay, okay, we get it. You all knew about us before we told you," David muttered, rolling his eyes. They had all come up with theories after they saw the pictures since no one said anything or suspected anything until the pictures were leaked.

“We’re happy for you guys,” Erin smiled, everyone else agreeing.

“Thank you,” you replied, giving her a hug.

The rest of the night was spent sitting on the couch with you finally being able to cuddle and be close to David without people asking any questions about it. It was such a relief to have your relationship accepted by your friends. It wasn’t that ever doubted them, you were just nervous telling anyone that you were dating him since you weren’t a YouTuber and didn’t want to take anything away from David and his future.

And while this wasn’t the way you had planned to tell everyone you were together, it didn’t matter anymore. The only thing that mattered was the fact that you two were confident enough in your relationship to tell the world, even if it had come a lot sooner than you anticipated.

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ihateitheredude · 4 years

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taking the backstreets chapter 2

pairing: Steve Harrington and Billy Hargrove

Summary: leaving this shithole town will be harder than expected. maybe.

Authors notes: I’m so sorry this took so long but im kinda proud of it so uhh yeah.

As I pull up to the motel I see Steve sitting on the sidewalk puffing a cigarette and leaning against the wall, backpack in his lap. He looks so pretty just sitting there hair disheveled and shirt messily tucked into his tight jeans. It isn't until I'm right in front of the sidewalk that he opens his eyes to look at me . the bambi brown eyes looking into my ocean blues with a look that i could only describe as exhausted determination. The eyes close for only a moment, allowing me to regain my senses from his transfixing stare. He pulls himself off the ground, slings his bag onto his shoulder and stumbles to the passenger side.

Steves halfway in the car when I break the tensed silence with a chuckle “careful pretty boy” his tired eyes snap to me with a simple “lets get this shitshow on the road” behind the fatigue in his eyes lives something else, an excitement of sorts. I have half the mind to ask about before he leans over and lands a sloppy,playful kiss to the side of my mouth. I look at him with a smile. Different from the ones I shoot to Karen wheeler and her gaggle of dissatisfied wives, but one that's genuine and heartfelt. It feels almost strange on my face, I’ve gone years without smiling like that but this boy with bambi eyes and sleepy smiles makes all those memories seem like they’re from another lifetime. If he were to find out I would truly be fucked.

We start our journey to california with a rev of the engine and a middle finger to this shithole town that's fostered fear and prejudice in one too many people. My thoughts are interrupted by Steve's hand finding my own. His long fingers lace with mine and he starts to rub little hearts into the back of my hand with his thumb while humming along to the Fleetwood Mac playing softly from the speakers. “Y'know when I was growing up I always saw myself growing old with a nice girl having two kids and living the exact same boring life as my parents. Little did I know I'd be running off to California to start a new life at the ripe old age of 19 ``I looked at him expecting to see some sort of regret, even a tiny sliver but all i saw was a look of giddiness when i looked deep into his gorgeous brown eyes. “What am I not nice enough for you stevie?” I tease. He smacks my shoulder and leans his head back with a smirk “maybe i didn’t want that nice girl. Maybe I wanted an asshole of a boy to y'know make life interesting.” this puts a smile on my face. “I think I found him” he follows up.

We’re almost in the clear when I see the familiar police cruiser on my tail. Not wanting to start this trip off with a police chase I pull over trying not to freak out. Hopper pulls up behind me, gets out of the truck, and walks over to my window with a questioning look on his face. “Hargrove what are you...Harrington?” he looks at me then at steve then back to me “hopp-” “what the hell is happening here?” That's when he spots the backpacks at our feet, a look of realization crosses his face. “California?” he asks and it takes me a solid minute to figure out what he means “oh yeah california. We’re headed to california.” he looks at us again. “You two are headed to...California...together?” we both nod beforw he takes a step back and laughs saying “damn ok i knew something weird was going on with the both of you but i guess i should have known.” steve pipes up with a soft “please don't tell anyone” hopper shakes his head and tells him he wont before turning to me and telling me that “I will be telling your sister..” before i can protest he finishes with “she deserves to know” and i can't disagree. He finally starts to walk away before stopping one last time, writing a number on a pad, and handing it to me telling us that if we needed anything to not be stupid but to call him. With that he turns and gets back into the cruiser and we’re off into the night.

We’re out of hawkins by about 100 miles when my heartbeat starts to pick up and my breathing gets a little heavier. My telltale signs of a panic attack start to make themselves known not only to me but my boy sitting in the seat next to me. He turns his head to look at me eyes going wide “baby whats wrong” he looks calm but his eyes are frantic. My words stumb le out of my mouth with no grace “what if she tells him. Steve what if he finds out” he looks at me confused “what if who finds out. Billy calm down.” i take a deep breath and tell him “what if max tells niel. What if he comes after us? What if….what if he hurts you?” at this point tears are rolling down my face. Steve looks at me and smiles “baby she won’t tell him. She won’t because believe it or not she loves you and wants you to be happy.” a small smile starts to creep onto my face. “And you know this how bambi?” he sighs and says “because she told me. We’re gonna be ok. We just gotta get out of herte man” he laughs a soft but breathtaking laugh. My worries are put on the backburner when listening to him but theyre still there. They’ll always be there but i can deal with them later right?

#Billy Hargrove #steve harrington #billy hargrove fluff #harringrove #harringrove fic #jim hopper #stranger things

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glasyasbutch · 4 years

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4 and 25 for whoever!

thank u lex!! 4. Who did they look up to as a child? Who do they look up to as an adult?

I already answered this one for craving and gent, so, i rolled randomly and got nissy!! Nissy: As a child, definitely Leth. She was absolutely the coolest person Nissy had ever met in his life. She was smart, and fancy, and everyone liked her, and she was nice to him, and always encouraged him, and he wanted to grow up just like her!!! Like, in general, big sisters tend to be either menaces who know no bounds, or absolute goddesses who you could follow around like a puppy, and Leth was 100% the latter to nissy.

Now, I really don’t know. Our baby wildemount module caught him at a point in his life where he’s genuinely lost pretty much all sense of direction he has in life. He feels failed by the system and the authorities he was raised to revere, and he hasn’t yet found another cause that he can get behind. He still looks up to Leth a little bit, in the sense that he realizes he could still become her if he stuck to the paved roads a little bit more. But he’s also old enough to take off the rose-colored glasses and realize that she’s neither particularly happy nor perfect, and while he Loves her, she’s not his idol anymore.

Now, one fucking hilarious thought that I had is that he sort of looks up to Nakoria, because she’s usually on top she’s very confident and seems to make herself welcome anywhere, and he does vibe with that “no you Will take me, actually” thing that she has going on, even if she is like. an evil shithead. Nissy doesnt KNOW that.

25. What do their hands look and feel like? ok dyke,,,,,

I rolled and got ezra, which I will do, but i’m also going to do some of my women characters because lesbians deserve to hear about womens hands.

Ezra: i hesitate to even say this because someone’s gonna make this about his penis, but I think he has pretty big hands, short thick sausage fingers like me. They used to be very calloused on the palms, and in the 5 years he was working as a caretaker rather than a temple guard, they started to fade, and now they’re in that state where they’re fairly red and tender as he gets used to wielding again. I don’t think he has any interesting scars or markings on them.

Craving: its pretty hard to see what her fingers look like, because theyre like. Constantly covered in rings. She probably has a few marks from rings that she never takes off. She’s got short nails, because archery, but they’re Very well kept, and fairly slender fingers, though I think she’s got a bit of a gnarled pinky that broke and re-healed out of line. Apparently now she has a tattoo of her own signature down her left pointer finger, thanks Glasya. Other than that, she doesn’t have any tattoos (not that she doesn’t want them, but she doesn’t particularly trust people to draw on her with a needle for a very long time. piercings are one and done but this is too much time and contact), but she probably has some very faded, but still present, darker patches along the side of one of her hands from burn scars.

Gent: Being a sailor means he’s got rope-worked hands, fairly rough, also pretty tan / sun-spotted. He’s got a few small scars like, on his knuckles from fights that didn’t quite go his way and a mostly-faded slash on one of his palms from a very stupid incident involving smashing bottles while Super drunk on wine with some of the other sailors on the Wench. (Pro tip: Wine Swords is not as fun a game as it sounds to play!) They’re also very likely to be ink stained - he does a lot of writing both as a wizard doing spellwork and as the navigator doing charting and mapping things, and he’s rather prone to smudges and spills.

#nissy #ezra #craving #gent

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moodycastiel-writes · 5 years

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sacrifice

summary: reader undertakes the trials to close the gates of hell in sam’s place. this is a little au that takes place during the season eight finale!

pairing: sister!reader and winchesters

warnings: angst. lots and lots of angst. foul language. y’know, the usual. there’s not a happy ending with this one. please don’t hate me (:

author’s note: i wasn’t originally going to write the confession, but i had a lot of ideas on how to establish a relationship between reader and the brothers, and i felt having her confess to her sins would make her more of an empathetic character. so yes, this is a small au that i had in mind where reader is sam & dean’s older sister who does the trials instead of sam. (((oh, also, cas does end up believing metatron and him and naomi kill metatron so the angels never fall.))) ((double also, crowley calls reader ‘fatale’, which is a rocky and bullwinkle reference, since he calls sam and dean moose and squirrel. just wanted to throw that out there in case anyone was confused to that reference!)) anywho, yeah, i hope y’all enjoy!!

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You could hear your blood pounding in your ears as you stood at vestibule of the run-down church, your shaking hand loosely holding on to the can of red spray paint, eyes trained on the devil’s trap you painted. This was it. Everything that has happened this past year is finally coming to an end.

You let out an uneven breath as the doors opened gently, the heavy footsteps of your brothers approaching you with caution.

“Do you have him?” you asked, not bothering to lift your tired eyes to meet them.

“Yeah,” Sam spoke, a level of uncertainty to his voice. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“I have to,” you answered, turning around curtly and brushing past Sam and Dean, leaving the church as you neared the Impala. It was only a few moments before they were both at your side again, the hot sun doing little to warm the permanent chill that settled into your soul when you first started the trials.

“We should get started,” you said, turning to Dean, “the sooner the better.”

Dean nodded his head and smiled at you, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. He opened the trunk and pulled out a handcuffed Crowley, completely at your disposal. Dean walked the demon into the church to get him ready, leaving you alone with Sam.

“How are you holding up?” he asked you as you grabbed the jar of holy oil from the back seat.

“Fine,” you responded, an unintentional iciness to your voice. “I’ll be better when this is all over.”

Dean walked back outside to meet you and Sam, wiping his hands on his pants. “Crowley’s all prepped and primed,” he turned to look at you, “How we feeling about this?”

“Honestly?” you asked, looking between your younger brothers, “Good. Better than what I have in a while. I think we’re finally going to win. This is all going to be over,” you sighed, a ghost of a smile appearing on your face for the first time in a long while.

Sam clapped a hand on your shoulder, but Dean cleared his throat behind you two. “All right, well, no dancing in the end zone until we're finished. What's the good father's playbook say now?”

You looked around the outside of the church eyes falling over the stained-glass windows. “Well... Now that we got the consecrated ground, I just, uh,” you cleared your throat, “I slip Crowley one dose of blood every hour for eight hours and seal the deal with a bloody-fist sandwich. That oughta do it.”

“Your blood's supposed to be purified, isn't it?” Dean remembered, “You ever, uh -- you ever done the ‘forgive me, father’ before?”

You shook your head, gaze dropping to the ground. “No, never. I have no idea what I should even say,” you admitted.

A thousand things were running through your head. All the countless times you’ve fucked up over the years. From the second your mother burned on the ceiling of Sam’s nursery to now, there was so many things you could confess. All the lies and betrayals, the murders and all the innocent people you’ve let die. Tears pricked your eyes, but you cleared your throat and blinked them away.

“Well, I could give you some suggestions,” Dean tried.

“O-okay, yeah. Sure,” anything could help.

“Alright,” he glanced at Sam, who had a disapproving look on his face. “Well, there was the whole siding with the demons thing. Or, um, ditching me when we were in Purgatory. Saying yes to Michael. Oh, also—”

“I get it!” you cut him off, not believing all the things he was currently throwing in your face. A wave of guilt washed over you, and an unsettling silence washed over you three.

“Well, we’re not getting any younger,” you finally said, passing Sam the jar of holy oil before making your way to the church.

“Hey!” Dean called after you, “Maybe open what you did to Penny Markle? In the sixth grade?”

You shot him a confused look, “That was you.”

Dean paused, the memory of what he did to poor Penny coming back to him. Clearing his throat, he waved you off. “Nevermind! Carry on.”

You rolled your eyes at him and made your way back into the church, closing the door behind you. You did you best to ignore Crowley’s eyes following your every move as you walked into the confession room, taking a seat on the bench.

“Okay,” you let out a shaky breath, “if anyone is listening, here we go.” You paused, your eyes screwing shut tightly. “Forgive me Father, for I have sinned.” A cool blast of wind rushed by you, ruffling through your hair. You took it as a sign that someone, somewhere was listening, and continued on. “I have made a lot of mistakes. I have so many regrets, so many sins, that I don’t even know where to begin. I watched my brothers die, so many times, for what? To fulfill some stupid prophecy? I should have protected them. I—” you stumbled on your words, tears threatening to fall from your eyes.

You wiped at your face and continued on. “I never should have let Dean sell his soul for Sam. It should have been me. I was supposed to do everything I could to protect those boys. If I just strapped on a pair, Dean never would have went to hell, and the seals never would have been broken. This is all my fault. I have to fix it.” The tears were falling freely down your face now, but you didn’t care enough to wipe them away. “I shouldn’t have let Sam ever say yes to Lucifer. I could have said yes. He never would have gone to Hell and lost his soul. It’s all on me.”

You took in another shaky breath, trying to calm down. “Leaving Dean alone in Purgatory… I don’t even know what I was thinking. I was so stupid,” you let out a humorless laugh. “I thought I was doing my best to protect him, but deep down I was trying to get away from him. From Sam. I caused so much pain in their lives, that it would be better if I just disappeared from their lives all together.

“But those things I’ve confessed, those sins I’ve committed, they’re not even the icing on the cake. I have so many things just piling up that I could sit here forever, but I don’t have enough time. My greatest sin, the tip of the iceberg… What I want forgiveness from the most is how,” your voice broke as you choked back a sob. “My greatest sin is how many times I’ve let my brothers down.”

An ache settled in your chest as you confessed what you never thought you’d say out loud in a million years. Another breeze of wind brushed past you, and you took it as a sign that your confession was over. You wiped your face, leaving behind all the traces of your confession in that booth and stepped out, your guilt weighing on your soul heavier than before.

Crowley stared at you with a smug look on his face, no doubt he heard everything you had just said. Eyeing a roll of duct tape on the table with your gun, the needle, and holy water, you grabbed it and ripped a piece off, tightly taping the demon’s mouth shut.

“Not a word,” you sneered, walking out of the church. You saw Sam and Dean talking with Castiel at the Impala in hushed tones. You couldn’t make out what they were saying from the distance you were at, and crept closer to them to make something out.

“—You’re asking us to leave her, Cas. Now, if anybody needs a chaperone while doing all the heavy lifting, it’s [y/n]” you were able to make out from Dean’s whispering. His confession about you was like a slap in the face. Did he really not trust you that much? Thinking you needed a chaperone for everything you did?

“You should you,” you announced, startling your brothers. You knew Cas was aware of your presence, and did nothing to acknowledge him.

They turn to look at you, a guilty look on their faces. “Seriously,” you added, not wanting to continue this conversation.

“Yeah, and leave you alone with the King of Hell? Really?”

You frowned at Dean, not understanding why he can’t trust you to do this one thing. Did he really expect so little of you where he is always prepared for you to fuck up and need someone to clean up your mess?

“Yes, really,” you snapped. You ignored the look of hurt that crossed over his face. “You two can’t do anything to help me. This is on me. I think I can get through one little thing without fucking it up.”

“[Y/n], you know that’s not what this is about,” Sam said gently. “It’s not that we don’t trust you. We don’t trust Crowley.”

“Crowley is bound to where he sits,” you argued, “nothing, not even the king of Hell, can get through both a devil’s trap and the chains we have him in.”

“Fine,” Dean said, “Start the injections now. If we’re not back in eight hours, finish it, no questions, no hesitation.”

“Yeah,” was all you responded. Castiel placed a hand on each of your brother’s shoulders and with the flap of his wings he was gone, leaving you alone at the church. With a heavy sigh, you made your way back into the building, facing Crowley. His words to you were muffled under the duct tape, but that didn’t stop him from blabbing. With a roll of your eyes, you ripped the tape off of his mouth, ignoring his wince of pain.

“You really think injecting me with human blood is gonna make me human? Did you read that on the back of a cereal box?”

You ignored the demon as you picked up the needle, pushing it into the vein in your arm. You drew enough blood and slowly ejected it, and walked over to Crowley.

“Are you listening to me, brat?”

“Shut up,” you sneered, thrusting the needle into his neck. He howled in pain as you yanked the needle away.

“You're miles out of your league, kid,” Crowley barked at you as you turned your back on him.

“See you in an hour,” you called over your shoulder, walking to the table at the altar. Your arms began to glow that golden color that always appeared after you completed the trials. Why was it showing up now? You bit back your pain, your hands forming into tight fists, waiting for the pain to go away. When the light finally faded from your veins, you let out a breath of relief and sunk to the ground, your back resting against the altar. You looked up at the cracked statue of Jesus on the cross and closed your eyes, waiting for your watch to beep, signalling the next round of injections.

—————————————————————————————————————

When your watched finally beeped after an agonizingly long hour, your were up on your feet as fast as you could get, the needle already in your hand. You ejected more blood from your veins into the syringe and made your way back over to Crowley, who looked at you with a mischievous glint in his eyes. You ignored the look in his eyes and issued the second dose of injections into his neck. In the blink of an eye, Crowley’s head turned and his teeth sank into your forearm, hard enough to draw blood.

“What the fuck!” you exclaimed in pain, drawing your arm back and clutching the new wound in pain. You gave him an exasperated look before punching the demon across the face. “Seriously? Biting? What are we, five?”

You shook your head as you walked away from him, placing the needle back onto the table. You spared Crowley another bitch-face as you walked out of the church, slamming the door behind you. You walked to the trunk of the Impala and grabbed bandages to wrap up your arm. As you secured the bandages, your arms began to glow again, and you fell to the rubble on your knees.

“Stop it,” you groaned as the light grew brighter. “Please.”

Finally, the light faded again, leaving you struggling to get a grip on your breathing. With struggle, you turned your body to sit upright against the Impala, your head falling back, staring at the sky. The sun had begun to set in the distance, the sky painted with beautiful sparks of color.

“I can do this,” you whispered determined to yourself, “I can do this.”

—————————————————————————————————————

Another hour had passed by and you made your way back into the church, stuffing more bandages in your pocket before doing so. At the sound of the door opening and closing, you heard Crowley chuckle.

“How we doin’, Fatale? Ready for another round of injections?” he asked, a joyous tune to his voice. You ignored him and filled the syringe with another dose of your blood.

“Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes,” he began singing, you instantly recognizing the David Bowie song, “turn and face the strange. Ch-ch-changes, just gonna have to be a different man. Time may change me, but I can't trace—”

His singing was cut off by a loud sound, the church beginning to rumble. You quickly turned to face Crowley who seemed unfazed by the sudden shock to the church.

“What did you do?” you shouted at him over the sound of the quake. He remained stoic, but the hint of a devilish smirk rose to his face. The floorboards began to creak under your feet, a large crack running down until it severed the devil’s trap that you painted right down the center.

“Did you really think you could kidnap the King of Hell and no one was gonna notice, dumb nuts?”

An expression of fury and fear took over your features as the door to the church were ripped open, Abbadon revealing herself on the other side of the door.

“Now that’s what I call an entrance,” she gloated, patting herself on the back.

“Abbadon?” Crowley questioned. “They told me you were dead.”

“So not.”

“Where’s the rest of the cavalry?”

“It’s just little ol’ unkillable me,” she smirked. You turned quickly, reaching for your discarded gun, but with a wave of her hand, Abbadon sent you flying across the church and into the wall, your head slamming against the wood. You groaned as you landed on your stomach, your vision going blurry.

“Brilliant. Why send in a few grunts when you can send in a knight? Say your prayers, Fatale,” Crowley smirked. You tried to get up, but the Knight waved her hand again and sent you through the stained glass window to your right, immediately falling unconscious.

—————————————————————————————————————

When you came back to, it took you a minute to remember what had happened. You scrambled to your feet, hoping not a lot of time had passed in your impromptu siesta. Looking around for a weapon that you could use against Abbadon, your eyes settled on the jar of holy oil you had given to Sam. He must of left it for you, in cast of an emergency. You let out a silent thank you and patted your jacket pockets, striking gold when you felt your father’s lighter in your pocket.

You crept to the entrance of the church where the doors were still open and peered inside, eyes landing on Abbadon hovering over Crowley. You snuck inside, careful to step around any loose pieces of wood to prevent any unnecessary noises to alert your presence.

“Right now, you and I are going to talk about a regime change,” Abbadon said, crouching down to send another punch to Crowley’s face.

“You little whore,” he barked, “I am your king!”

She punched him again, this time hard enough to shut him up. When she went to stand back up, you ran forward and threw the holy oil over her body.

“Burn, bitch,” you spat, throwing the lighter on her. You watched with a smirk as her body lit up in flames and she screamed in pain as her vessel burned. Her mouth opened wide and she exited the body before any further harm was done to her, and she escaped the church in a flash of black smoke.

Without wasting any time, you made work of picking Crowley back up and fixing the chair so it was back in the devil’s trap. He groaned as he came back to consciousness, watching you with a glint of something… admiration, maybe? to his eyes.

“You did good back there, Fatale,” he congratulated you. “I'll deny it if you ever quote me, but I'm a proud man. I'm proud of you.”

You ignored his comment, instead focused on gabbing the can of spray paint you left on the table to fix the trap where it broke.

“Wait, what are you doing?” he asked.

“What does it look like?” you snapped, overly agitated at the events that had just transpired. You finished up the devil’s trap and threw the can to the side, it clattering to the ground noisily.

“Are you joking?” he asked, incredulously. “I just saved your life!”

“Seriously?” you dead-panned.

“Seriously? Me, seriously? We just shared a foxhole, you and I. We beat back the Tet Offensive, outrun the --the Rape of Nanking together! And still you're gonna do me like this?!”

You ignored his tangent and grabbed the needle, filling it up with your blood and jamming it into his neck before he could get another word in.

“Aah! Aah!” he exclaimed in pain, before a whole new emotion washed over him. “Band of Brothers? The Pacific?” he asked. “None of this means anything to you? All those motels, you never once watched HBO, not once?” You shook your head at him, confused at where he was going. “Girls? You're my Marnie, Fatale. A-and Hannah, she just—she needs to be loved. She deserves it. Don't we all—you, me; we deserve to be loved. I deserve to be loved!” he shouted, before lowering his voice back down to a whisper, “I just want to be loved.”

You cocked your head the the demon. “What?” you asked.

A confused look washed over him, and his expression mirrored yours. “What?”

As the moment of Crowley’s tangent passed, a wave of fatigue passed over you. The pain of where the needle was injecting into you suddenly took a toll on you. You walked back over to the table and placed it down, grabbing the spare bandages from your pocket. You wrapped where the puncture wounds were tightly, wishing right about now you had some extra strength tylenol. You took more blood from your opposite arm, wanted to be prepared for the next dose of injections just in case something else was going to happen.

“Would it be possible, Fatale, I’d like to ask you a favor,” Crowley spoke, his voice sounded drained and exhausted. “[Y/n], earlier you were confessing back there, and… well, I didn’t hear much, not really, so I’d like to know what you said.” You gave him a look that read ‘that’ll never happen.’ At the sight of your expression, he instantly clarified his statement. “ I only ask because, given my history...it raises the question... Where do I start...to even look for forgiveness? I mean…” he trailed off.

You paused, shocked at the revelation. The cure, it was working.

“You start with this.”

You held the needle out in your hand, showing him what you meant. Crowley tilts his head to the side, exposing his neck where the marks of the past injections were. You gently pushed the needle through at his submission, and unlike the past ones, he showed no signs of pain, but rather contentment.

“This is going to work, Crowley,” you reassured. “You’re going to be cured, and you’ll be redeemed. I promise.”

A gust of wind blasted through the church, and your arms began to glow again, but this time there was no pain. “We’re almost done,” you whispered, not sure Crowley even heard you. “It’s time.”

You took a deep breath and began the exorcism, the final piece to purify him. “Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus, hanc animam redintegra, lustra.”

As you pulled your knife from its holder, the light grew brighter, and you sliced across your palm. You walked closer to Crowley, and as you were about to feed him your blood, footsteps barreled through the church.

“[Y/n]! Stop!,” you turned at the noise, coming face to face with the worried looks of your brothers. You backed up from them, your hip bumping into the arm of Crowley’s chair, a confused expression on your face.

“Easy there,” Sam coaxed gently, putting his hands up. “Take a deep breath.”

“There’s been a slight change of plans,” Dean said, slightly more aggressive than Sam.

“What? What’s going on?” you asked. “Where’s Cas?”

“Metatron lied,” Sam explained. “Him and Naomi are going to confront him.”

You shook your head at him, still not understanding what was going on.

“You finish these trials, you’re dead,” Dean said bluntly, trying to get you to understand what was happening. You looked between your two brothers, then back at Crowley. You scoffed and shook your head, looking back to face them.

“So?” you said, your voice slightly breaking.

Sam and Dean’s faces melted from worry to an emotion you couldn’t place, but it was somewhere along the lines of hurt and betrayal. Betrayal. Even now, after you’ve confessed and sought forgiveness, you were still letting your brothers down in ways you couldn’t stop. It had to stop. Finishing these trials with your death, it’ll all stop.

“Look at him!” you exclaimed, pointing down to Crowley. “Look at him! Look at how close we are! Other people will die if I don't finish this! Who cares about me?”

You could feel the tears pricking at your eyes, but you ignored the sensation. Dean took a small step forward, his brow creasing. “Think about it. Think about what we know, huh? Pulling souls from hell, curing demons, hell, ganking a Hellhound! We have enough knowledge on our side to turn the tide here. But we can't do it without you.”

“You can barely do it with me,” you fired back immediately. The confused look on his face egged you to continue. “I mean, you think I screw up everything I try. You think I need a chaperone, remember?” you couldn’t help the single tear that fell from your eyes as your voice cracked on the last word.

Sam frowned. “That’s not what he meant—”

“No, that’s exactly what he meant!” you exclaimed, cutting him off. You let out a humorless chuckle. “You want to know what I confessed in there?” you asked, pointing to the confession booth with the hand that you didn’t cut. “Do you want to know what my ultimate sin was? The thing that held me down the most?”

When neither of them answered, you continued. “My greatest sin was—is— how many times I’ve let the two of you down. I can’t keep doing it. Not again. Finishing this, it’ll end it all.”

“[Y/N]—” Sam tried, but you continued talking.

You held back a sob as the tears finally began falling. “You two don’t trust me anymore, I can see it in the way you look at me. Like I need one of you with me at all times. You haven’t trusted me in a long time, and it took me awhile to realize it, but now that I have I feel so fucking stupid for not seeing it before.” Another humorless laugh escaped your lips.

“I know I’ll never earn your trust back, there’s nothing else I can do to prove that I love you both more than anything. You don’t see it, and I’m tired. I’m so fucking tired of watching you guys turn to other people when you get sick of me.” At their confused expressions, you elaborated. “Who will it be next? Another demon? Another angel? Another vampire?” You shook your head.

“You have no idea what it feels like to see the two people you thought—”

“Hold on, hold on!” Dean cut you off, finally breaking you from your tangent.

“You seriously think that?” Sam questioned, taking a step forward to be back in-line with his brother. “Because none of it, none of it is true.”

“Listen, [Y/n],” Dean began, “I know we’ve had our disagreements, all of us, okay? Hell, I know I have said some really fucked up things to get you thinking the way you are but you need to understand… I killed Benny to save you. I'm willing to let this bastard and all the sons of bitches that killed mom walk because of you. Don't you dare think that there is anything, past or present, that I would put in front of you! It has never been like that, ever! I need you to see that. I'm begging you.”

Your shoulders slumped at his confession, and the tears fell faster from your eyes. You looked between Sam and Dean, then down at your bleeding hand, and in a split second you made your decision. You turned and brought your hand up to Crowley’s mouth, and instantaneously you felt him drinking your blood. The pounding in your ears resumed, and you barely heard Sam shouting words of protest behind you.

You pulled your hand away, and the light erupted throughout your entire body. “Kah-nuh-ahm-dahr,” you whispered. Crowley let out a gasp, his eyes flicking to his demonic red, then faded completely back to his human eye color.

“It worked,” you laughed, turning to face your brothers. They looked at you with wide eyes, not daring to move. You had no time to celebrate your victory of the trials, instead a large rumbling echoed throughout the church, and the ground began to crack again.

This time, underneath the cracks in the ground, a hellish light peeked through, eating away at the floorboards. A hole opened up underneath your feet and you jumped back far enough to the edge, opposite of your brothers as your watched with wide eyes as black smoke broke through all the windows of the church, glass shattering everywhere. The sound of hundreds, if not thousands, of demons screamed as they were forced back into hell against their will. The wind picked up harshly and you were thrown back from the portal to hell, losing the sight of Sam and Dean through the smoke.

When every last demon was through the portal, it closed up tightly, no signs of what had just happened anywhere. When the smoke cleared and the dust settled, you looked across to your brothers, a smile creeping up on your face.

“I did it,” you whispered, pinching yourself to make sure you weren’t dreaming.

Your heart hammered in your chest and you groaned at the pressure, stammering back an inch. Immediately, Sam and Dean were at your side as your legs began to give out, helping you to the ground. “I did it,” you repeated, your voice getting weaker, your eyelids becoming heavier.

“Yeah, [Y/N],” Sam sniffled, “you did it.” He gripped your hand tightly, squeezing it in his large one.

You smiled weakly up at him, using what little strength you had to squeeze his hand back. You looked to your other side to Dean, whose eyes were red-rimmed.

“I’m s-sorry,” you whispered at him, at the both of them.

“You have nothing to apologize for,” Dean said, finally looking over your pale form.

“You have to… you have to promise me,” you croaked out, struggling to get out your final words. You coughed, doubling over as it overpowered you. Raising your free hand to your mouth, you coughed up blood into it. “No bringing me back,” you finally said. “I’m at peace.”

“You can’t ask us to do that,” Sam said. You turned to look back at him, smiling sadly at him. You grabbed Dean’s hand with your free hand, feeling your last breaths creep up on you. You could have sworn you’d seen a person standing over Sam’s shoulder, but they had disappeared before your vision could focus.

“I love you both, so much,” you whispered, you eyes falling shut. Your grip on your brothers’ hands loosened, and your chest stopped rising and falling. Your head lulled to the side, your body completely still.

You stood over your two brothers, holding your body in their arms as they wept for you. A cold hand rested on your shoulder, and you turned around with a gasp.

“Tessa,” you said, staring at the reaper.

“[Y/N],” she greeted, a welcoming smile on her face. “It’s time.”

You nodded your head and she stuck out her hand. You spared one last look at your baby brothers, and grabbed her hand in yours, your soul leaving Earth to face judgement. You did not know where you were going to end up, if your final quest was good enough to outweigh all the shit you’ve done in your life.

You knew that Sam and Dean would be okay. They always were without you.

#supernatural #supernatural one shot #supernatural imagine #supernaturalimagine #supernatural x reader #dean winchester #dean x reader #Sam Winchester #sam x reader #sister!reader

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