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gayhoediaz · 2 months

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Another sexuality headcanon: How would you describe the gap between what Buck thinks about his sexuality and what it is. Less the gender of the people he's attracted to and more: what he enjoys and doesn't, what he's good at and not, his beliefs about the range of sexual pleasure that are possible for him.

Where Eddie has very little sexual experience, he's fully aware of his inexperience and (thinks he) is fine with it. Buck thinks of himself as sexually experienced, but is severely limited in his imagination about what's possible. Eddie knows what he doesn't know, whereas Buck doesn't know what he doesn't know, if that makes sense.

ooooh this is such an incredibly interesting question i’m immediately setting it to a draft because i know i’m going to have a lot of sporadic thoughts throughout the day before i’m ready to post it.

personally, i don’t doubt that buck is good at pleasing his partners, as fun as that storyline was. even when he was buck 1.0, he had a massive need to be useful, and really i think that’s what made him turn into a “fuckboy” in the first place. i think he is similar to eddie in the sense that he is used to being the one to give. unless it was a really really quick hookup, i think he always ate those women out, because it’s famously one of those things that is seen as selfless, and something that a lot of men won’t do or won’t do often.

i would argue that buck isn’t all that adventurous in bed because he knows what he is good at and he knows what works. (we’re specifically talking about pussy right now because from what we know it seems as if his bisexuality is going to hit him like a truck. but if your belief is that he’s been with men before i would argue a lot of these things would still apply.) he knows how to eat, he knows how to curl his fingers, he knows how to fuck - knows how to not go too fast or too slow, knows how to read his partner’s body language when they want him to go harder or softer, etc.

i think buck is confident in a handful of sexual acts he has carefully perfected over the years, however i do not believe that he is confident when it comes to sex period. because i would argue that people who are kinky and/or confident in the bedroom are happily willing to try absolutely anything (within reason - as in the only thing that would stop them would be them not wanting to do it, but not them wanting to do it, but being nervous to do it, that they won’t be good at it? if that makes any sense?) i think if someone asks him to do something different from what he’s used to, i think he would hesitate because he just simply wants to be good.

i think buck thinks of himself as experienced because he is good at these certain things (and i think perhaps he considers himself kinky because of vanilla-kink like cockrings, fuzzy handcuffs, etc.)

the other day i got an anon that asked me if i thought that buck liked being pegged and without thinking twice i said yes, but now i’m thinking… i don’t know that he has ever tried it? i’m not abt to die on the hill that he hasn’t, because i think it’s one of those things where it’s technically not his responsibility to make it “good”? if that makes sense? at least that would be my thinking if i was pegging a guy who had never been pegged before, i would just want him to relax and make sure he’s okay and having a good time - but that brings me right around to “buck likes sex to make other people feel good and to get their approval” the only way i can see “straight” buck getting into pegging is because he meets a girl who really really wants to peg him and i think that goes for a lot of sexual acts tbh.

i also think most women he has been with just like the women eddie has been with (and i’ve heard this from similar guys irl - buff, masc, etc) just kind of don’t pay a lot of attention to them in general outside of their dicks.

quite frankly, i think buck is going to go through a little bit of a shock the first time he is with a man (whether it’s eddie or not) and i think it’s just from the simplest things like suddenly he’s being… kissed? like a lot? they’re telling him he’s beautiful - not just hot but… beautiful. and they’re palming his dick through his boxers, and it’s not new, sure - but the way they’re doing it is new. they’re doing it softly, teasing him - not to reach a goal of a hard dick so he can get inside them and please them but just… palming him to slowly tease him, make him feel good.

then they’re asking him what he wants, which i also don’t think is common.

and i think buck comes to the conclusion that while he does like to give, being on the other side of things is also pretty good. allowing himself to have enough belief in himself that they’ll still want him even if he takes a moment to just lie back and enjoy himself.

however i also think that once he and eddie get together and he starts to notice eddie getting kinkier and more of a cockslut, buck simultaneously realizes that being controlling in bed is pretty good too - which is also something i think he has never allowed himself to be because most of the people he’s been with have been so much physically smaller than him. but when eddie starts do want it harder, starts to want more - i think buck finds himself enjoying it a lot, and yes a huge part of that is that he just loves giving eddie what eddie needs, but i think it’s also an outlet at the same time, not needing to be so careful all the time (although they’re careful enough of course.)

and i have talked to @queerbuck about this at length, but as far as both of them go, i think they just grow to be absolutely disgusting together, and exploring a million things neither of them have ever considered before and i think it’s going to be beautiful.

#nie answers 💕#mutuals 🏷️#yrames 💎#buddie meta #evan buckley #911 meta

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defilerwyrm · 8 months

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I'm a trans man who wants phallo SO bad but the Fear Mongering people do makes me so scared. I have such a fear of surgery anyway and people say phallo is nearly 23hrs long, and it has more risks than heart surgery does, and idk if these are true bc I'm too scared to google it..But I want it so bad, but the stuff I hear scares me. Also people saying it doesn't have any sensation worries me. You said trans men can ask about it so I hope this is ok to do on anon!!! I'd appreciate a non fear filled reply so much thanks!!

23 hours!! Those poor surgeons, can you imagine!

Virtual hugs if you’re the hugging type, Anon, and a cool rock if you’re not.

Those things are definitely not true, not remotely. It’s a long surgery, but when I say it’s long that means it’s about 8 hours all told. It sounds like maybe someone heard it referred to as an “all-day” thing meaning a full WORK day, but instead assumed that that meant a full CALENDAR day. Or, you know, a transphobe made shit up to scare people.

It is most definitely not nearly as risky to your wellbeing as a surgery in which they saw open your sternum and cut open your actual beating heart. There is a fairly high chance of a minor complication that can result in the terrible ordeal of getting pee on your pants sometimes—a urethral fistula—and in most cases, they close up on their own anyway without needing another surgery to correct them. And in this case, “fairly high” means 40%, so it’s still less than half a chance that it’ll happen in the first place. At worst it’s annoying. Serious complications, the type that put you in danger, are extremely rare.

The sensation thing is also false, because they literally harvest a length of nerve from your donor site and hook it up to your existing bits specifically so you WILL have sensation! Sure, it takes a little while for the nerve to heal, but that’s just the reality of ANY surgery.

The nerve grows back in your donor site, too, by the way. While I was typing this up I discovered that one particular spot on my graft is ticklish.

Everyone has their own individual healing factor, but speaking for myself, I had full erotic sensation before the 3-month mark, and the orgasms have been incredible. The head and base are highly sensitive, and everything in between responds pretty damn nicely too, just less of a hit-the-ceiling level of sensitivity. And, you know, if you’ve handled an AMAB person’s penis much at all you’ll know that’s pretty much in keeping with how their dicks work too.

It is an in-patient surgery so if you have it, you’ll be staying in a hospital for a few days so they can keep an eye out for rare disasters. My stay was four or five days of snoring most of the day and periodically getting woken up to eat or answer some simple check-in questions, lift my arm for nurses to move stuff, etc, and then conking back out.

Being cathed sucks, but two weeks of frequent trips to the toilet to drain your bag is honestly nothing compared to a lifetime without (or with vastly reduced) bottom dysphoria. That’s the part that I hated. Everything else was your typical recovery: 10-15 days of sleeping 20 hours a day, then however many weeks of being tired, taking meds, and careful washing, gradually feeling more and more normal until you’re back up to full and ready to get back to business as usual.

Except with this one, you get to learn to pee standing up in the process. :D

(Protip: don’t try a public urinal until you’ve got it down pat at home. Not because of cis men, but because the learning process is messy, lol! The overwhelming majority of cis men in public restrooms want nothing to do with anyone else while they’re in there. The only place anyone’s gonna give your dick more than half a second’s accidental glance is in a gay bar. In 8+ years of using public men’s rooms I have yet to see one (1) penis that wasn’t mine!)

#phalloplasty #ftm #trans men #bottom surgery #trans matters #transphobia.#queerdom #medical transition #replies to things

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hoothalcyon · 1 month

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Ruthari + Nonsexual Kink

After reading this post by vaspider about nonsexual kink in a romantic dynamic, the wheels of my brain began to turn before finally landing on Ruthari, and not only Ruthari, but the fact that they already demonstrate some signs of nonsexual kink in their relationship.

note: I don't think they were intentionally written this way, I'm just having fun :)

The most easily noticeable instances take place in the graphic novel Bloodmoon Huntress, but it also represents their entire dynamic as a couple, so I will go through both.

Firstly, it's easy to see how well this dynamic would fit the both of them. Runaan has an incredibly stressful life or death job where he has to take the lead and do very difficult, fatal things. He can maintain this pressure for the amount of time needed for the mission to be completed, but he can't carry that weight forever, everyday. It's been said that he is the most emotionally open he possibly could be when he's with Ethari.

Which brings me to why it fits Ethari. He is a misfit in Moonshadow society, or at least in the Silvergrove. He's "not as strong as the others", he's a creator and inventor in a friend group full of assassins. I bet he would want to feel some control and power, even if only behind closed doors, but not so specific as to only in the bedroom. And what better way to feel control than consensually dominating the leader of the assassins, am I right?

In borrowing from the original post, I will highlight these key parts: "surrender[ing] control to someone whom they can trust...because in their everyday life, they have a lot of responsibilities and stress, and going into that space where nobody can ask anything from them, where they have no responsibility to make any decisions at all, is a relief to them."

And, vice versa, "for some of us, that kind of service allows us access to a feeling of power that can be hard to access in our daily life, and that feels really good."

So, now onto canon examples...

The way Runaan goes from lightly ribbing Ethari for his over the top welcoming party for Rayla before quickly changing his attitude when Ethari gets serious and says darling...

I'm 100% imagining that the use of "darling" with a serious demeanour is one way Ethari signals to Runaan that he needs him to behave/follow his lead without question 😈

2. The market scene where Runaan is all petty and acts up, causing dysfunction between him and Rayla. Ethari swiftly puts him in his place and Runaan doesn't challenge him. He knows he's overstepped, and his dom is putting him in his place. He literally shuts up and goes all doe eyed at him.

Ok, but consider that for a second. Runaan is singlehandedly the most stubborn character in the entire show, and yet, Ethari can boss him around with no questions asked. Kinky.

3. Ethari bringing Runaan his weapons. To me, this indicates, again, that they both enjoy when Ethari wields control over Runaan's actions. He is the stepping stone his sub needs to complete tasks, he needs Ethari's care and attention. Runaan could just grab his weapons himself and head out, but he waits until Ethari has prepared them, put them in a sack, and handed them to him with a kiss.

4. Ethari instantly getting authoritative and grumpy when Runaan is badly injured, and investigating with his hands before Runaan gently lets him down.

When Runaan is injured, all of Ethari's emotions come rushing to the surface: grumpiness, protectiveness, worry, affection, etc. All the ingredients that make him a good dom. He wants to protect Runaan from danger and angst. He feels helpless watching Runaan fling himself into battle, so the moment it stops, he rushes over to inspect him for injuries and tow him away somewhere safe. He is the caretaker. It's his responsibility to keep his sub safe and healthy, and he doesn't take that lightly.

But the fact that Runaan is insisting it's 'nothing' is frustrating. He needs Runaan's yellow light signals--the soft smile, holding his hand--and also Rayla distracting them, to help him cool off.

And so I'm picturing that when Runaan is injured, Ethari has him kneel (if he can), bow his horns, and take off any clothes that are covering the injury and reveal it to him before he can begin to tend to him. It's his act of submission, of showing Ethari he is ready to relinquish control to him.

And that type of dynamic, of Runaan admitting his vulnerabilities to Ethari, who will only use this information to help him heal, is immensely beneficial to them both. Runaan gets to vocalize where and how he feels wounded, and Ethari gets to have control over healing him and being the only one who knows about these wounds.

Other, smaller canon findings:

Runaan being covered in different things Ethari has made, which have his signature swirlies on them (i.e: his bow, hair cuffs, horn cuffs). Yes, the other members of the moon fam have smatterings of these on their bodies and weapons as well, but Runaan's design features them most frequently. He's literally COVERED in them. This is a visual representation of how he belongs to Ethari.

One major exception to this dynamic is when it comes to assassin stuff (unrelated to injuries).

The way Runaan doesn't mention it when Ethari stealthily steals a sip from his tea (nor when he mentions that said tea is bad, lmao).

Headcanons:

When Runaan comes back from a mission and doesn't know what to do with himself, Ethari tells him different things he can do for him, and that helps put him in the mindset of things different than constantly training, and reminds him that he wants quality time

slightly silly hc where Ethari in his workshop and he whistles for Runaan to come down and Runaan is there in a flash to model something for him or give input on a weapon lmao

#runaan #ethari #ruthari #this is MY self indulgent headcanon UwU

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fabrickind · 3 months

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How do you become a professional cosplayer? Thnx :)

Hello there!

Short answer is: you don't lmao

Long answer is: it's complicated and incredibly difficult, and depends on what you mean by "professional."

If you mean "someone who judges contests and/or gets invited to cons," the VAST majority of those aren't professionals. They may or may not get an appearance fee, even, depending on the con. (Note to cosplayers: don't let cons take advantage of you by not paying you for your work for them! Always get per diem, travel, and hotel at BARE minimum, and preferably also an appearance fee.) This isn't that hard to do, but you need to have a portfolio that backs up why you would be a good guest, and a good reason why you'd be a good guest. It's just a matter of emailing and/or applying to cons. I've only guested once, but if you want tips, I can give them.

However, based on the phrasing, I'm assuming you are a newer cosplayer who isn't ready for that yet. I assume this because if you've been around a while, you know that this isn't a question. Not "this isn't a question you ask" (as in, we don't talk about it in polite society), but that this isn't really a *thing* in the way that people outside of the cosplay community seem to think it is.

(Side note: I remember this question being asked for at least 15, 20 years online lmao it's easier to make money cosplaying now than it was then, but it's still incredibly difficult to make a living wage and fully support yourself on cosplay.)

There are professional cosplayers out there, as in, people who make the majority or all of their income from cosplay. They tend to be few and far between, and one of the open secrets of the community is that some people who try to make a go at it are supported by a partner or family with money.

But! There are ways to make money as a cosplayer. It's difficult and unlikely, especially with how saturated the market is, but there are ways.

This is all from a USA perspective, which I assume you're from or at least a similar culture, since you're asking me and not, say, someone living in Japan.

Do commissions. This works once you have a high enough skill level to have a client base that wants to pay you for those skills. It's difficult to both get enough commissions and finish enough commissions to have a living wage, though, so it's really only recommended if you are fast at it and/or are okay with it being a side gig.

Start a business selling resources. Patterns, 3D models, resin kits, etc. You'll be operating on thin margins, there's competition out there, and you'll need to be good and fast at these things, but some business prowess, skill, and a bit of luck, and people have done it. Some people also sell tutorials and such, but I don't know how much they make.

Sell prints. This is going to be the hardest of these to make a living wage on. You can couple this with other things on this list to add supplemental income. Basically, sell pictures of yourself online and at cons, start a Patreon, become a booth babe (there isn't enough in the way of "official cosplayer" jobs to make a living on, and usually you aren't paid much and still have to make the costume), etc. This bullet point usually goes with the next two.

Become an influencer. Confession: I don't know quite how this works, but your money would be coming from sponsorships, paid posts, youtube ad revenue, etc. This is also a lot of work, and you would basically be hustling 24/7. Think of the direction you would want to take this and what specific thing you would offer that sets you apart, and.....figure out how to become an influencer lmao. idk if there are cosplay influencers that make a full living off of it since it's a somewhat newer field and far from what I do, but the margin of success is also pretty small, I'd imagine.

Sex work. This is even further from what I know about, so I have NO idea how much money you would make or how to get into it. I'm sure there are guides online. You can do anything from the extremely soft (think gravure modeling: sexy clothes, lingerie, sexy poses, light nudity) to harder stuff (depicting sex acts, whether solo or with toys or partners, catering to fetishes in addition to cosplay, camming, etc.). This is going to be difficult as well and while all of these are not for everyone, this one especially. (Honestly not my thing at all but so much respect for people who can handle it.) You'll want to keep yourself safe online for SURE if you go into this, and it will require stricter safety measures than the rest of these (which also require strict safety measures). Also think long and hard about whether you want the stigma following you: unfortunately, our society still stigmatizes sex work, and you can lose jobs, friends, etc. if people find out, and it'll be hard to physically get and keep your money because of banks and credit card processors not accepting sex work money. This isn't to say "don't do it" but it's something to really think about and look into. IDK where to get advice on the cosplay specific side of this, but Slate's How to Do It column has had a few letters about sex work generally over the years -- here's a few -- and usually Stoya points the letter writer to further resources. (Also tends to be only cosplay adjacent from what I've seen? You'll be dressing up but won't be wearing much in the way of costumes lmao)

There might be more ways that I can't think of, but these are the main ones you will encounter. Again, being a professional cosplayer isn't really like....a thing. Most people who have done it have had a long and difficult career of carving out space for themselves and finding income streams. There really isn't something, at least here, that is having someone pay you to exist in cosplay, unfortunately.

I'm also assuming you aren't talking about costuming generally as a career, which is a whole different ballpark. Actually, that might be something to look into as a career to fund your cosplay hobby (and possible cosplay side gig) if you are interested. Otherwise, enjoy it as a hobby, slowly build a business if you think you are up to it, and see where it takes you. :]

I hope that helps! Good luck

#professional cosplay #cosplay help #cosplay advice #cosplay tips #anon #fabrickind gives solicited advice #i don't meant to be discouraging!#but also like......it's not easy #and you aren't going to find openings for “cosplayer” on indeed #you need to create an income stream #and realistically? won't get anywhere #but you might and that's the fun of it!

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son1c · 1 year

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Hi! Hope you're doing okay. I love your Sol Sonic AU! Question:

1. How similar and different is Sol Sonic compared to Canon Sonic and Canon Blaze? Like, in habits, attitude, etc. Obviously he has his need for freedom, but how does he present himself to others? Does his royal upbringing have an impact on his conduct?

2. His fighting style. You made his outfit pants similar to the firefighters in the anime Fire Force. How does he fight, in a a way that differs from his Canon counterpart and Canon Blaze? Does he breakables a lot? Does he ever learned swordsmanship, because imagine Sonic wielding a sword made of fire.

3. Character conclusion. Sonic's need for freedom vs his duty to his kingdom. Does he pass the ruling to someone else at the end, or does he forsake his desire for freedom completely after his mission? Or does he find a compromise between the two?

4. You said that Sonic's sens of duty towards his kingdom is stronger than his desire to be free. What got him to finally act on that desire? What villain, or threat, motivated him enough to strike out without contacting anyone else for help to deal with the threat in his stead?

These are all I have for now. Take your time in answering them. Love your artstyle and your Sonic Prime AU of Shadows. Drink and eat regularly!

strap in. this response got REALLY long

sol sonic isn't a fusion between sonic and blaze's personalities! his personality is the same as it's always been, it's just now, he's been forced into a situation that's not suited for him. his royal status challenges his free spirit and makes it difficult for him to truly live the way he wants to. it's hard on him-- he represses a lot, and finds himself oftentimes feeling dissatisfied with his life.

as for how he presents himself to others… sonic, canonically, creates a mask for himself, a very specific image that he wants other people to see. it's the same with sol sonic. except now, there's an extra layer of "everyone is counting on me AND it's my job". so the pressure is up even more. he can't show his sadness or dissatisfaction, he can't let people know when he's frustrated, because he has to keep a level head and make the best decisions he can for everyone.

most people view him as incredibly intimidating, but that's just because he's got an iron grip on his emotions. he can't cry. not because of sega… but because he needs to be the person people can rely on to keep everything together, even when anyone else would be falling apart.

he doesn't have much fondness for other royals. he's friendly enough, and plenty cordial, but the only one he has any real connection with is the neighboring kingdom's princess, elise. they bond over being put in a position they didn't ask for. and he finds some comfort in knowing he's not alone in feeling the weight of a kingdom on his shoulders (although, he doesn't tell her that obviously).

as for his "royal upbringing"… i think he thinks it's silly. he's not one to "follow expectations" if he finds them boring and pedantic. he's very casual when it comes to the way he interacts with all that high society shit. but he knows-- it's just another part of the mask. and he should at least try to keep up appearances. so he'll entertain it. but he never takes it very seriously.

his fighting style isn't much like blaze's… that type of flashy wizard type shit. it's not really his style. i'd imagine he uses his fire powers in a much more melee type style. fire kicks/punches etc. i also think it'd be fun if he kind of like, incorporated break dancing into his fighting style? like his moves are very reminiscent of a street dancer-- cuz that's his REAL personality. the freedom he feels when he can let loose with his flames reflected perfectly in the style…

also, i'm gonna say hard yes on him using a fire sword. that's literally the coolest concept ever and i was already thinking about drawing something like that at some point so yeah. it goes hand in hand with his more hands on combat style too, since the "sword" is really just an extension of himself (as opposed to something that can be sent flying like a fireball).

"does he pass the ruling to someone else at the end"… sonic would never shirk responsibility to someone else just because he didn't want to do it. he doesn't want to-- but he will. "it's not about chivalry for me, i just gotta do what i've gotta do." he takes care of people, he protects them-- how could he simply stop doing that? just because it's difficult for him? absolutely not.

but he doesn't forsake his desire for freedom either. after his quest to save the world, he realizes he can kinda have a hannah montana moment. the best of both worlds. he can go out and interact with the world WITHOUT abandoning anyone. in fact, he can find new ways to help people through venturing out. he's still tethered to his duty, but he can stretch his legs. if only just a little bit.

so... the question has to do with the overall plot of this au. so i'll explain that now: basically, what if iblis is sealed in the sol dimension but like, not perfectly? there's cracks. fire comes through... and iblis minions rise up, tormenting civilians and endangering property and etc. so sonic takes it upon himself to manage that, even though he's not supposed to leave the castle. then one day, the sol emeralds mysteriously go missing, and silver appears. not a good sign. sonic takes the opportunity to get the hell out, reasoning that it won't take /too/ long to save the world.

canonically, blaze sealed iblis away and saved the future. but what if the god was able to escape death? what if it fled to an alternate timeline... where things are just a little bit different?

so, the person who stole the sol emeralds was actually mephiles. not au mephiles. THE mephiles. from canon. and he's got a horrible grudge against sonic... mephiles' plan is to lure sonic away from the castle so he can trick the prince into unsealing iblis. by a twist of fate, this time it's sonic, who, with the power of the sol emeralds, is the only person capable of such a feat.

#angstandhappiness #sol sonic #thanks for the questions wow <3 #text heavy

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pikapeppa · 10 months

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Hi! I absolutely love all your fanfiction that I've read so far. I don't know if this has ever been asked so feel free to ignore or point me toward the answer if it already exists. The thing that I admire the most about your fanfiction is how clearly you capture the character's voices. I can literally hear them in my head whenever I read the dialogue you write. I can't think of a single piece of dialogue that you've written where I've thought "Hmmm no... I'm not sure that character would say that". And though you are writing in third person, your narration is so clearly conveying the thoughts of the character whose perspective you are writing from. I feel like I'm in their heads! I'm wondering HOW you are able to do that so clearly! Do you have some kind of method to observing canon dialogue and then conjuring what the characters would say? How do you match their natural speaking styles, inflections, mannerisms, etc? Or maybe you just have a natural gift for it? I'm in the process of writing a fanfiction and it's so important to me that I capture their voices well, particularly because the two characters are extremely different and I want to capture those differences as I switch perspectives. If you have any insight, tips or suggestions, I'd welcome them!

First of all: THANK YOU SO MUCH OMG 😭❤❤🙏 this is such incredibly high praise!! Trying to make sure the characters sound like themselves (both in speech and thought) is so important to me, so this whole ask is like, the nicest thing you could ever have said HAHA!! Thank you so so much!!!

I’m sorry my reply was delayed — I was actually think about how to answer! I don’t think of myself as being a very systematic writer in that I don’t use any formal tools or have any formal training, so what I’ve done here is verbalized my own process in the hopes that it’ll give some insights. You asking this question has helped me think about my own process in a way I never really have before, so thanks for this fun mental exercise lmao!

My usual caveat when answering these wonderful writing-process asks: I have no formal training, as mentioned above, and this is entirely based on my own experience, and thus should be taken with a grain of salt! 😂🙏

I’m not sure what fandom you’re writing for, so I’ll be as general as possible, but if you want to know more about a specific fandom or character(s), let me know! 😂

We’re thinking about two things here:

How the person says stuff (speech patterns, inflections)

What the person is saying (thoughts/what’s going on in their head)

(see below the cut for the rest!)

How the person says stuff: capturing the “voice”

The main thing I do when trying to capture someone’s voice is, quite literally, just listen to it a lot LOL. Whenever I get obsessed with interested in writing a new character, I typically save video clips of all of their dialogues so I can pull them up on my computer at will to listen to. When it comes to what exactly I’m listening for, there are several things to consider:

Formality: do they speak casually or formally? Are there contexts when they might speak more or less formally/casually (e.g. with certain people, in certain social settings)? Do they use a lot of contractions when they’re talking (e.g. don’t/can’t vs. do not/cannot)? Do they drop the ‘g’ at the ends of words ending in ‘ing’ e.g. “I’m gettin’ out of here”?

Vocabulary: do they use basic everyday vocabulary, or do they tend to use more rare/unusual words? Do they have training of some kind that would make them more prone to using special words in a specific context (e.g. mages in Dragon Age using magical jargon)?

Cursing (a special and VERY IMPORTANT case of vocabulary): Do they curse? If they do curse, how often/in what circumstances? What is the “worst” word they use in canon, and that you can imagine them using based on what you know about them? Sometimes you have to use your imagination a little here depending on the rating of the game/show etc., and that’s okay; e.g. they never use the word “fuck” in Horizon Zero Dawn/Horizon Forbidden West but I can’t imagine that world existing without it LOL.

Cadence/lyricality: I don’t even know if these are the right words to explain this. But some characters have a distinctive rhythm or “musicality” to their speech that can make all the difference to whether they sound like themselves or not when you’re writing them. Some good examples of this are Solas from Dragon Age (whenever he’s talking about the ancient past), Nil from Horizon, even Geralt in the Witcher 3 (the game specifically, not the books or the show). Also important, for these characters with a special “rhythm” to their speech, do they always talk like that, or is it only in certain contexts (see re: Solas)?

Accent: a character’s accent doesn’t “look” any different when written on the page, but it’s a obviously a huge part of whether they sound like themselves when you're reading their words in your head. Different accents use the above features in different ways, too, so the idea of an “accent” ties back to the elements mentioned above. This is especially relevant when writing someone where the “standard language/lingua franca” may not be their first language, so they may have more hesitations in their speech, their sentence structure may be simpler, their curse words may be in their first language, etc.

This probably all sounds like a lot to juggle. But in practice, basically what I do is just imagine the character’s voice in my head, then just write the dialogue to sound as much like them as possible, while holding the memory of their voice in my mind. If I start to feel like the memory of their voice is getting a little blurred in my mind, I pull up video clips of them talking and listen to them again until their voice is clear in my mind so I can continue writing. If the character is a tricky biscuit, I might listen to clips of them talking before every writing session just to refresh their voice in my mind.

You mentioned mannerisms in your ask, and I’ll talk about this separately! Some characters have mannerisms/body language that is very characteristic to them (e.g. Alva and Drakka in Horizon Forbidden West), but for other fandoms, you might not have much in terms of canon body language to go on — for example, the Dragon Age games (everyone does the “Bioware Lean” LOL. You know what I’m talking about. It is not very character-specific). I usually invent little physical quirks/fidgets that seem in keeping with each character, and the context in which they might do those things. E.g. does the character run their hands through their hair when they’re anxious? Do they do a little hop when they’re excited? Do they have their arms folded most of the time?

What the person is saying: getting into their head

This is the topic where I might be less helpful (even less helpful HAHA) because I don’t do anything particularly systematic or formal to keep important information straight about a character. But there are a few important things that have their own sections within my outlines, which I’ll expand on below.

Stuff I made up

One important thing to keep in mind with fanfic is that no matter how much canon info we know about a character, canon does not give us everything. Canon might not even give you a character’s age! Every version of a character I write is partly headcanon/stuff that I made up, which means it may not match other people’s headcanons. What matters is that you keep it consistent within your own understanding and fleshing-out of the character. For instance, a lot of the time I’m inventing a sexual history for a character since that stuff isn’t explicitly mentioned in most fandoms LOL. The key here is that whenever I’m writing that character moving forward, even if their sexual history is made up by me, I’m sticking to it and staying consistent with what I’ve invented for them.

Core motivations, core conflicts, and formative relationships

This gets at the big, underlying foundations of the character — what made them who they are, and why they react to the world in the way they do. Who do they love, and why? Who hurt them badly? What personal traits do they have (e.g. are they a “lawful good” sort of person) that play a big role in how they see the world? For instance, in the Horizon games, Aloy’s relationship with Rost and her sense of connection with Elisabet Sobeck are huge influences on everything she does. In the Witcher (games and books), Geralt has a core conflict between “witchers don’t get involved in politics/world affairs” and his own sense of morality, which combines in fascinating ways with his overriding need to make sure the people he loves are safe. Knowing these very broad, core traits/relationships will be central for helping you decide how your character reacts to various events and people in your story. You might have some canon information about these important core traits/relationships, but you also might be making a lot of this stuff up, and that's okay; as mentioned above, it's just important to keep consistent with what you came up with for that person.

For romances: why them?

Since I’m always writing a romantic and/or sexual relationship, I always have a section about why those characters are together. Why them? Why those people specifically? What’s so compelling about the two (or more!) of them together that makes them worth writing about? What is it about those people that makes them good for each other or bad for each other, and that makes us want to follow their relationship? For me, this can be a pretty meaty part of the outline, since it’s so central to what I love to write. Having a clear picture of why you are writing these people together, and why they’re interesting together, will help you shape their interactions and how they react to each other as your fic goes on, and how they react together to external events.

Knowing the information outlined above then forms a foundation for everything you write about that character moving forward. If you know those things about the character, then getting into their headspace is just a matter of using those foundations to predict how they would react whenever new situations arise.

I hope this is helpful!! I'll also pop in a link here to my other tutorial posts I've written, in case any of them are helpful. And if you want more examples tailored to a specific fandom, feel free to ask or send me a DM! 🥰

-- love from your friendly neighbourhood Pika! xoxo

#pikapeppa tutors #fanfic writer's life #thank you for the wonderful comment and the very interesting ask! 🥰

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gabessquishytum · 1 year

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Okay LISTEN on my bullshit again but your last comment about Dream being a voyeur set off my kink bells to alarm mode. I get that Dream is a lovely voyeur. I do! And I love that! But I want to offer this up -

Hob as the voyeur

Maybe different scenarios like:

Dream fucking someone else (dealers choice here who) and Hob (accidentally?) walking in - this one could go MANY ways. Angsty because it’s someone whose not Hob, on purpose kink negotiated scene, cucking, sudden realization of the “oh” moment that Dream does have sex and Hob didn’t think he would ever be interested and now he’s VERY interested, etc etc.

Hob as a legitimate honest to god peeping tom and all the morally grey that brings in. (This is my let Hob be Problematic™ agenda)

Hob watching other humans in the waking world - maybe an orgy?

Dream masturbating and Hob walks in on him (I’ll be honest I have a WIP I haven’t finished of this because this does it so much for me. But you know the saying- MORE CAKE)

Dream specifically sending Hob sex dreams [&/or daydreams] of himself fucking or masturbating and forcing Hob to watch them - Let Dream be Problematic™ too as a little treat

Incredible content once again, you have truly outdone yourself with this one my friend.

Idk what it is about this ship, I have never in my entire life found cucking remotely sexy but now I’m like. What if. WHAT IF. Either in a dream (problematique dream my beloved <3), or even in the waking world (depending how attached to canon you are). Hob walks in on Dream fucking Eleanor?

Hob loves Eleanor, he worships the ground she walks on, she’s his soulmate and he has never been so happy. Hob also loves his mysterious Stranger, who he has met only twice and even so, who holds an entire portion of his heart.

And right there, in their marriage bed where their son was conceived, Eleanor lies with her arms clasped around the neck of the Stranger. They look so good together, both fair skinned and soft. Hob’s Stranger is driving his wife to the very heights of passion, drawing sounds from her lips that Hob has never even imagined. He stands in the doorway and god, of course he isn’t going to interrupt! There’s no feeling of betrayal, just an overwhelming sense of how fucking lucky he is. He looks into Eleanor’s eyes and she smiles at him like she wants him to join them but Hob just. Can’t. He’s watching the way his Stranger moves like liquid, like molten silver. He’s watching the way that pretty cock drives into his wife’s body as though claiming a place within her. It’s. Too much. He doesn’t even get to touch himself, he’s already reached a trembling orgasm. And if it’s a dream, he wakes up beside Eleanor wondering what the fuck and also wow. And if it’s real… he has a lot of questions. When he can actually speak again.

I want to talk about EVERYTHING in your ask at length and please be aware that I am VERY INSPIRED and there may be a barrage of voyeur Hob fics on their way. But I have to mention peeping tom Hob here because I am also very much a fan of the problematic Hob agenda.

Like. Maybe it’s an accident at first. Hob has been dreaming for over 600 years so he has a pretty good level of control over the dreaming itself. He can walk around and see things that other sleeping people don’t. He doesn’t mean to end up in the Dreamlord’s bedroom, obviously. Especially since aforementioned Dreamlord is his best friend! It’s an accident, 100%.

The part where he hides against the door with his face pressed in a convenient crack while he watches Dream indulge in a little self-pleasure? Not an accident. The part where he comes back again, night after night, sticking his hand down his pants so he can rub one out while he watches. Also not an accident.

Dream knows. He knows everything. It amuses him that Hob thinks he’s being so sneaky and devious. He’s only there because Dream enjoys being watched. But Hob doesn’t know that. And the mixture of pleasure and guilt has never felt so delicious.

#pintobordeaux #dreamling #the sandman #nsft #cw voyeurism

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swordheld · 2 years

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hello! i wanted to ask how you developed your vocabulary :') i have been using a lot of incredibly simple words in my writing and in how i respond to people in general and i'd really like to learn how to elevate that! any help is super appreciated. thanks so much :')

hi love, thank you for sending in such a fun question! it was such a joy to give attention to how i go about my own process, as well as research common formulas for you to make your own. i hope this helps guide you even a little. 💌

before we begin, i want to offer you a little bit of my own take: that there’s really nothing bad at all with using a lot of simple words. they’re fun, common for a good reason, and are the fundamental building blocks for any language.

on your journey through etymology, i recommend keeping in mind ideas of accessibility, especially in the contexts where you use more varied and complex language. sometimes you read (academic essays/journals in particular are a big proponent of this, unfortunately) and find that the words used are so complex that reading through is like slogging through literary quick-sand, when the core ideas are actually simpler than the whole of the work may portray.

how and when i use certain types of language is something i try to keep myself actively aware of, especially within specialized fields: if someone doesn’t know what you know (or vice versa) it isn’t a question of comparison, or intelligence, but about the opportunity to teach, learn, and share the knowledge that was once given to you, as well.

to participate in hand-held chain of language and knowledge that has been passed down through millennia. there is something so amazingly special, i believe, in being able to become a part of that.

but i digress! for the process of developing: what’s helped me is probably the most common answer you will find nearly always w/ answering this query: reading. but as a whole, it’s a little vague of an answer and at times feels like a very large goal to begin tackling, so let’s break it down in some fun steps:

find authors whose language you find yourself drawn to, and build yourself a catalog of curiosity and interest. read, read, and then read some more – become your own little library of words, from every source you can find even a smidge of interest in (books, articles, videos, poetry, post-it notes found tucked into all different kinds of spaces, half-torn receipts, music lyrics, overheard snippets of conversations, etc.) and cultivate a further understanding of the kind of language that clicks with you, what you’re interested in. create a museum of your tastes, curate it to hold everything that brings you that joy of discovering new kinds of language.

after you’ve found some inspiring writers, it’s then time to look a little bit further, and find the smaller pieces within the writings that reach out to you. what is it about the style that you like: is it the imagery, the description, the poetic prose, or otherwise entirely? see if you can find patterns, little symmetries that follow with your sense of interest.

then it’s what seems always comes next in things to do with goals: practice. you can do this anyway you want: you can write, talk to someone (even yourself), maybe even start up a little journal to track your progress. try testing out different styles as if they were coats: see how they fit, how they feel in your own voice, how they exist on you, specifically. you can do this by picking out a vibe/sentence/idea/etc. from any of the smaller pieces you’ve cataloged, and imagining what it would be like to continue it, what it would look like if you made it your own.

the best part is that you can repeat this for as long as you’d like! the wonderful thing about language is that it’s always evolving and becoming something new everyday. your own kind of language at any point is yours, all your own, your voice, and you can tailor it as you wish.

let me know if i can be of any further help to you, and i wish you so so much luck on your fun learning and curating adventure ! 💛

#q&a.#birdsong.#you got this my love !! it may take a minute but anything important does.#i have lots of feelings ab language ! ! always ! !#if i learned anything from my time in the stem fields it is that you do not have to explain things complexly.#there is always a way to bring it down / to hold it close to knowing for everyone.#why are we learning if not to find a way to give it back into the world?

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wetcatspellcaster · 7 months

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hiii. really love the intrigue and plot of Pieces! i know you wrote the note about personalization of power word kill forevers ago but i think about it every now and then. its such a cool bit of flavor.

i was wondering; do you have any mind palace lore about how pwk is different for every wizard? or even anything about how rosalie learning it was like? im so curious as to what it entailed to make her sick afterwards

love all the d&d thought going into this fic x

Hi anon!

Thank you for the question!! When playing D&D, I like when people get asked what their 'word' is when they use spells with word in the title (healing word, word of radiance, etc) so Power Word Kill was an extension of that trope - this often means that the Word is not my choice but someone else's! (Although I have now chosen words for high ranking mages in my game as a result of this ask!)

As for specifically in this fic, I often imagine incredibly high level spells are high/inaccessible because they are highly abstract and theoretical and require studying, not just copying or transcription. So I imagine it looking like someone basically doing the magical equivalent a long math problem, and then the word offering itself as the answer once you understand that spell on an intrinsic level, like a mathematical proof.

In the case of a lot of spells, you'd know you've gotten the right answer because you know... it would work. But unless you're just going around murdering people in trial and error, Power Word Kill would only feel right once you knew you'd gotten it right. In the case of Rose, I think doing a really long math problem to kill something and knowing that's what you're doing, and then getting the word Inferiu and knowing exactly where that comes from.... you'd know you'd gotten it right immediately. But you also weren't expecting that answer or that specificity, it would probably make you feel really shitty.

(Also I'm just such a fan of that fanfic trope where people throw up for emotional reasons lmao, it's what YA literature raised me to vibe with).

#asks #anons #wip: pieces still stuck in your teeth #when we talk about [redacted] i will go into spellcraft worldbuilding more but tl;dr some spells are public domain some arent #and the murder spell very much isnt lmao

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lyriumsings · 1 year

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for octavia: hero, fans, and development!

Hi!! Thank you for the ask! I’m gonna try to be less wordy because tumblr keeps eating my paragraphs lol

Hero: What is their favourite thing about G? Why is your MC such a big fan?

Probably their lyricism. Octavia is a very wordy person lol. They would most admire someone who has a lot of poetic, witty songs that can be interpreted multiple ways. Also G’s versatility. I personally like songs that feel like multiple songs in one and I think they would too. Or artists who are just capable of a wide range of sounds and styles which G canonically is.

Overall, it’s just that G is original and unpredictable. After meeting G in person, ngl I think they’re about what Octavia expected. Nobody’s perfect and G is a rock star so it seems pretty accurate that they would be Like That.

Fans: How is their relationship with their fans? Do they go out of their way to interact?

Octavia loves their fans and interacting with them. Anyone who likes their music Octavia feels on some level understands them and may or may not feel the same as them. Their songs are usually deeply personal so Octavia really is putting a lot of themself out there when they perform.

Their music is not very “family friendly” but as a former hardcore music fan in my teens that hardly matters. Teens make up a lot of demographics anyway especially like sad ones lmao. So the fan aspect and the “influencing the young” part of fame are aspects she takes very seriously.

And as cliche as it sounds it’s still true that without fans Octavia wouldn’t have any sort of career. I imagine at the height of their career in the future they’ll go out of their way to do things for them. Buy food for people waiting in queue for their concerts, pay off college debt, etc.

Development: How did you come up with your character? Is their design still evolving? How do you think they might develop through the story?

I LOVE this question!! OK SO!! I kind of try to build my MCs into the narrative? Basically, I try to make a character that would be the most interesting (have the most issues lmaooo) to me. It’s hard to some up all the factors i take into consideration when making them because in my head it’s so complicated.

Step one is always pick a name lol. It’s honestly probably the hardest part for me. Finding a name that feels right and fits the setting is really important to me and after that comes everything else. Their actually personality is dependent on the personality of the characters they’re surrounded by based on that I decide how outgoing or introverted or well adjusted lol they are. Because that controls the dynamic between the characters.

And then based on their personality I start building the background so they have reasons to be that way. Whether they had supportive parents or any at all. If they were poor or rich etc etc. It helps me shape core character values.

Visually though, I always start with the face! Drawing the face is always my favorite part!! And I try to give them features that either compliment or contradict their personality. For Octavia specifically I wanted them to look kind of soft?? Which is something they actually don’t like—rounded cheeks puppy dog eyes etc.—and this is something she actively tries to offset with make up on stage. Octavia actually thinks they’re kind of plain so that’s why they wear make up at all on stage they don’t think they’re ugly they just don’t think they’re what a rock star is “supposed to look like”.

Next I go for palette which is also one of my favorite parts!! I always knew they were gonna be bipoc because *I am* and I would’ve killed for a lead of a alt/rock/punk whatever band that looked like them when I was a kid. Bipoc are incredibly underrepresented in that particular music scene so lol yeah. And I actually went back and forth on their hair color a lot but red just idk popped the best.

Are they still evolving visually? yes but mostly in the fashion department lol. I still have a lot of experimentation to cover; and narratively I think her development will go into a more hopeful place lol. But not until after a lot of angst. I’m a sucker for a happy ending so i’m gonna do my best to give them one bUT character building comes with suffering first so fksjdj but I mostly develop the character into what I think is the most interesting path? So, ngl it really just depends on what is thrown at them. If it makes sense for them to spiral out/things to go wrong and there’s a sequel with a change to fix it I might let them spiral out lol but overall I like happy ends after a good amount of trial so most likely Octavia will develop into a better version of themself lol

Thank you for the ask! “I’m gonna talk less” I said lol so that was a lie apparently.

#asks #answered #please don’t eat my fucking words tumblr #i screenshoted everything i said jic and i’ll just retype in the replies whatever it cuts off #grapecaseschoices #sorry in advance tho #if it comes off seeming like i didn’t end properly it’s bc i didn’t 😭😭😭#oc: octavia blackwater

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traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors · 1 year

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hi! I'm looking for resources/an answer to a question I have regarding trauma. warning for mentions of c-ptsd and abuse(?) but nothing in depth.

I experienced ongoing trauma throughout 2021 and have c-ptsd now. the experience included a lot of being manipulated and made to believe what was happening wasn't really happening. I don't remember just about anything that happened that year. I can put together some memories from 2020 but nothing very specific. I do not remember 2015-2019 clearly at all. I'm not sure why, because I don't remember experiencing anything traumatic those years, and my ptsd is specifically from the trauma I endured in 2021.

what little I do remember from those years feel like something I watched in a 3rd person movie rather than something I experienced myself. I feel like I've been randomly dropped in 2022, or like i woke up in someone else's life.

heres the thing though!

I can remember 2010-2014 pretty clearly. like, a lot of it. about myself (more than I did other years), and how the world was. like news, pop culture, music, movies, fashion, trends, all of it is very clear and familiar to me.

with my memory loss there's this huge gap of lost time between then and now. I've described it to people like waking up from a long coma and seeing yourself and the world completely changed. it sounds very dumb and fake but honest to God I can't remember anything that's happened in the world in the past seven or so years. my few patchy memories are all of myself doing mundane silent things like waiting at a bus stop. and again all of those are fuzzy and third person. anything important? nada. not specific details about myself, nothing related to politics or pop culture, nothing that even suggests I actually existed except for family pictures.

I feel so disorientated with everything all the time and I am struggling really hard with understanding modern things like technology and social media. I have a hard time with remembering basic stuff like bringing a face mask with me when I go out. it's practically impossible to find dvds anywhere (at least where I live). phones are so big and hard to navigate. malls are wayyyy emptier.

I don't really talk about this to people because it's embarrassing and obviously sounds incredibly fake but I feel so out of touch with everything.

I've got an ok grasp on world events that have happened (thanks to lots of googling) and I haven't had much trouble understanding the current political climate cause the "radical" beliefs I held back then are now way more normal and expected today, and my family and friends have been good at reminding me of things that happened in our personal lives when I ask. it's been about 10 months since I started remembering things clearly again and I think I've done pretty well at grounding myself.

I'm not really enjoying it. I still dress the way I did in the early 2010s because it just feels more normal to me. I dont understand what a lot of words or terms mean. people are a lot more hostile online and everyone speaks in a really condescending tone. people have been mean to me when I don't know who certain celebrities are or when so-and-so died or when this-or-that was released. again all of this just sounds stupid but honestly it's really stressful for me and I spend a lot of time feeling extremely anxious and overwhelmed by everything. I feel really dumb for not getting it and not remembering anything. I also feel like I'm faking it, even though I can't imagine why I'd do that and I can't explain where that lost time went.

I guess my question is if anyone knows what this is, what this means, etc? like, what's happening? is this a thing? am I just crazy? is my brain tricking itself somehow? I feel so lost and confused. I've been in therapy and I know trauma can do weird things to the mind but I've never heard of anything like this and I wouldn't even know where to start looking. any help is appreciated

Hi anon,

You're absolutely not alone. My trauma was from 2014-2015, and I can't really remember most of 2015-2019. I think part of it is simply that trauma often sets a bar that everything else now falls under, which can make life seem so boring that it becomes a blur.

Another thing is, in terms of structural dissociation, CPTSD can be a precursor to a dissociative disorder such as OSDD or DID, as well as identity disturbance such as BPD. In my experience with (what I think is coming from) BPD, I literally do not identify with the person I was when I experienced the trauma, and use a different name and pronouns to reflect that. I also do not have a stable sense of self, and sometimes my sense of past is clearer sometimes and foggier other times.

With a dissociative disorder, the explanation of this large passage of time is amnesia. If you're plural, sometimes an alter who experiences trauma may go dormant and/or another alter will front for an indefinite amount of time (this can last years). Then when the previous alter awakens from dormancy and fronts again, it can feel like someone has been living your life without you, because it has. This may also explain why the memories from that time were in the third person. Either way, many alters who emerge from dormancy need to be updated with the current situation.

You may find it helpful to look into Internal Family Systems, IFS. It's a therapy that treats an individual client as made up of multiple parts of themselves, and it helps to identify what those other parts are, how they work, and what they want to communicate. Often times, when speaking to a traumatized part, they believe they're still as old as the age of the trauma, and/or will believe that the Self never aged. This can be why it's disorienting for you to deal with the pandemic and technological advancements.

You've been through a lot. Please remember to practice self-care, whether that's making sure your hygiene is taken care of (even a nice bath or something), or rest. You deserve to do what relaxes you or makes you happy.

You're doing a great job.

I hope I could help. Please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

#mod bun #trauma talks #abuse

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devsgames · 9 months

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what's your "dream game" to make and what's your "dream game" to play? how different are they?

Thanks for the ask! :)

Dream Game To Make

If we're talking as full-time work, I've actually had questions like this in interviews before and I'm so pragmatic that my reponse is always "I don't think of dream projects or dream studios, think of dream cultures". I want to work on projects in ways that are equitable and fair, with people who are actually like-minded. If the foundational culture and context of your work is good then the game you're making shouldn't really matter.

In terms of personal work, it sounds like a cop-out but if I had unlimited time and energy and money I'd want to try and make everything honestly! What I like about gamedev is that while every production often has the same (or similar) constraints, every game has a unique set of challenges and problems to solve. Like, I've never worked on two prouects that had the exact same design problems and I love the variety to it and how the different challenges still give you transferrable solutions you can use in the future. This sounds like a response you'd read on a cover letter but I swear I do mean it, it's why the genres of the games I've publish tend to be really inconsistent across the board. I like new problems!

As a more concrete answer, I do have a couple of concepts I've spun in my head that I never had the skillset to bring to life. One specifically was called "Egg Game", which I thought up back in college.

The basic jist was it was more of a marketing campaign or social experiment than a full game. I imagined it as an exclusive game you could only get access to by getting a copy from someone who had access to Egg Game OR by buying it for a ridiculous price (like $2000 or something). The game itself would be an idle Tomagotchi-like where you leave it running and hatch creatures from eggs. The creatures don't do anything and there would be no gameplay to speak of, BUT you have to sign a EULA saying you can only say great things about Egg Game. The game itself sucked, but the 'experience' around it was designed to feel exclusive and tantalizing to people who didn't know anything about it. Essentially I thought it would be fun to see how something like that might take off, how it would 'spread' to others, who might 'leak' it and how dramatically, etc. It was fun on paper but I always knew it would be WAY too much work for me to do, probabky wouldn't be profitable in any way, and relies on skills and connections I really don't have. Fun to think about though!

The other one is a personality-based sport management game where you have to manage egos and personalities as opposed to skills and hard data. This one I've talked about before, but I still see it as reachable down the road so probably won't speak to it too much for fear of jinxing anything.

Dream Game To Play

I typically like playing games that are incredibly complex and procgen because once I start to see patterns in gameplay I lose interest really fast. Stuff like Grand Strategy like Crusader Kings 3 or milsims like ARMA3 - very different than the games I usually make.

Per above, I also really like the concept of managing people as a a core gameplay focus - like State of Decay style - because I think it's interesting and helps build narrative. So maybe something where people management and deep gameplay ties together?

On that note Dwarf Fortress Adventure Mode is pretty close to my dream game. Just give me a huge chatoically generated procedural world with tons of stuff in it and people to talk to and places to get lost in and I'm happy :')

#asks #sorry for the typos #im sick tho so its fine

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playtwewy · 1 year

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Time to put your money where your mouth is by answering the remaining questions about Joshua in the ask game

im on it, boss <3 are you prepared?

3. A song that reminds me of them

Are You Satisfied? by Marina and the Diamonds. in my infinite hubris i tried to actually make a comic for him with this song once before i remembered i was bad at art :)

4. How many people I ship them with

hmmm probably only like 3? Neku, Beat, and Haz .

5. My favorite ship of them

Joshneku probably lol

6. My least favorite ship of them

honestly like any others than the ones i mentioned above but also i just don't really seek out a lot of ship content anyways.

7. A quote of them that you remember

Shopping is fun! The Game is better this way :) (<- he was too much for this)

8. Your favorite outfit of them

look this man only has like two canonical outfits so instead, im gonna pick my fave and least fave of the clothes items that give him specific bonuses in game. That being said, fave is of course the bunny parka. we all love the bunny parka <3

9. Your least favorite outfit of them

Probably Vernal Equinox. idk if aqua is a good color for joshua to wear realistically.

11. What’s the first thing you think about when thinking about the character?

this tumblr post:

13. Your favorite friendship they have

12. Sexuality hc!

His and Neku's friendship will always be my favorite, but i have to say that his and Mr. H's is also very very good and fascinating to me <3 and also, even tho it is not canon, i am a firm shiki and joshua eventual besties truther

14. Best storyline they had

i mean what else can I say, but that his whole arc in twewy is incredible

15. Worst storyline they had

they really just wanted to pretend that joshua didn't exist in neo until they couldn't ignore it anymore

16. A childhood headcanon

I do really like the fanon stuff about Joshua being musically inclined before he took on the role of Composer, but to me i always imagined it as him feeling drawn to musical instruments but not really being good at them. So to me, Joshua was definitely a piano kid, but did not necessarily take to it easily nor was necessarily good at it. But he loved just sitting there and plucking keys and could do it for hours :)

17. What do you think their first word was?

probably something simple like 'want' or 'mom/dad'

18. How do you think they were as a kid? (Like, were they shy, noisy, wild, etc)

Polite for all intents and purposes. Definitely a quiet kid imo. I'll be honest and say that i don't really dwell on how Joshua was pre-Composer.

19. The most random ship you've seen people have with them

i remember a weird period of time where i saw a lot of joshua and rhyme pairing stuff. idk if that was just me but it was bewildering.

21. When do you think they were at their happiest?

I really do think Joshua was having the time of his life in Another Day and playing Tin Pin, that is my truth.

23. Future headcanon

24. What do you think is a secret they have that they never told anyone?

hmmmm well since I've been thinking about it a lot, Joshua and Eri would also be really good friends after Joshua becomes more integrated into the main cast friend group and he is also the one to get her into Tin Pin

Post-Neo Joshua definitely just inserts himself into Rindo's life.

well it was his identity as Composer but well we know he told someone eventually. I guess I'd say he would never tell Rindo or anyone else wilingly that he was chosen as a proxy. I don't think Joshua would do that twice. I think in that regard he learned his lesson

29. How do you think they would be as a parent? (and if they are a parent, how do you think they would be if they weren't?)

I think its more I don't think he would ever want to be one. if anything the closest I think he's come close to is being a mentor figure, similar to what Mr. H is implied to be towards him. And while I don't think he'd excel at it I think he would do a good enough job depending on the circumstances. but uh given his proxies I dont think it should be willingly tested.

30. funniest scene they had

FORGOT TO ANSWER THIS ONE IN A PREVIOUS ASK IM SO SORRY

that whole scene where Joshua tricks Neku into going to cat street on day 3 was the funniest thing to me on my first playthrough and it still is one of the funniest joshua moments to me to this day lmao

his response kills me too

#walks out of this ask covered in blood: 👍#still thank you <3 #asks

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writingonesdreams · 2 years

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Dreamy! Happy STS!

It's a Suits AU! [I haven't seen suits so please explain a lil more explicitly for me 🤣]

How do their dynamics change (or don't change) to reflect this new AU? Is there a new plot? A new sourse of conflict? Go off and ramble about how you imagine this AU!

@bloodlessheirbyjacques :D

Happy STS, love <3 You know I love this question? This is an ask after my heart? You are letting me talk about what I'm thinking about? You are a sweetie, thank you!

Okay so Suits is a legal drama about the top super powerful wealthy law firm in New York where the ace lawyer Harvey hires a young genius new lawyer trainee...who got kicked out of law school and just wasted his life away getting into trouble with drug deals of his very toxic best friend.

Suits is basically about this incredibly powerful people who are ruthless and sneaky and elitist and unapologetically after money and fame...showing incredible loyalty to each other. It's about the lifestyle of such powerful circle lawyers, cause they have no personal lives, sleep in their offices, barely have time to eat or go home, cause their work is everything for them. It's slavery on end with great money, nice suits and the environment is full of pressure, competition and crazy ambitious colleagues who want to defeat you out of fun.

But still, this ruthless charming top deal closer, Harvey is insanely loyal to his boss, Jessica who paid his school and supports him, just like he comes to support and care for Mike. They are each other's family in a way, with working so intensely together. Donna is Harvey's secretary and she is basically his ears and eyes and heart, cause she knows better what he thinks than he himself does. And there is Louis who is vicious, petty faultfinder but would still stick his hands into the fire to help the firm and the others, when needed who just years for little recognition despite his terrible personality.

This would be a modern world AU. Skye would be an cultural anthropologist doing research on law firm work environment, getting a unique chance to do it in Pearson & Specter. She is doing routine work for a project sponsored by the university, not really interested, but her professor is a former classmate of Jessica's (the firm's boss and Harvey's protector). So she gets the place, first disgusted by their slavery work attitude, their mean demands even towards her, like she should be happy to kiss their feet being there...and then gets impressed by how much Harvey reads into people, doing basically what she does but better and more confidently and with more experience. She would befriend Mike, being his confidant while he is still unsure if he will get together with Rachel or not and even after. Skye would barely figure out he is a fraud just from the way he can't act like he is from the same social milieu as the Hardward stuck ups around him, so he is both scared and impressed and relived to have someone to talk with.

Skye would be helping Mike with cases, reading into people and their circumstances the way only a cultural anthropologist could (the backgrounds, situations, speciation cultures of specific companies etc), would get Harvey's and Jessica's respect and even a long-term contract as consultant as the firm. And then she would bring over two of her other friends, also both lawyers. Zephyr an expert on criminal law who worked with the police and detectives on cases and Leander who was leading a very successful young law firm until a recebtky kissing everything over a risky case he bet it all on.

The plot would basically follow the Suits storylines - cases, courts, contracts pushing the characters in and out of their flaws, getting better, finding out who they are and what kind of pekoe they want to be. Where are the lines they wouldn't cross, dancing in the space between what is the truth and what is the law. Zephyr and Leander and Skye would be a united trio from the get go, bringing in more open loyalty and dedication on display. Appreciation of each other (the way Harvey denies Louis for no reason), more self-awareness, less competition (Harvey and Mike stand out in the firm for being so loyal to each other - maybe this wouldn't have to be an exception for everyone else).

I love putting Zephyr, suspicious with hard working habits and pompous noble ideals with Harvey, who is sassy, mischievous, with playful sneaky methods...but actually cares about not crossing the lines and winning fairly. Zephyr on the other hand is willing to do anything, even cheat if he believes the case is important enough and this is a big clash between them. It's so fun to watch I might create a character to add this dynamic...I have an idea for a certain guy to embody the contrast to Zephyr for him and for Skye as well. A counterpart that isn't on his side, like Leander.

Yes yes, I think this would be worth a shot.👀😂

Thanks for the question, excellent excellent. 💕

#sts #Suits AU #ask #wip: tears of iron

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ltleflrt · 2 years

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13, 18, 32, 34

Hellooooo, thanks for playing 💕

13. What is a subject matter that is incredibly difficult for you write about? What is easy?

I'm not great at sustained angst. I mean, I can write angst, but in a 100k fic, it's usually like 3 chapters. That being said, writing fluff is easy for me, because that's what I'm known for lol

18. Choose a passage from your writing. Tell me about the backstory of this moment. How you came up with it, how it changed from start to end. Spicy addition: Questioner provides the passage.

"The world does something crazy after someone dies. It continues to turn." Chapter 18, No Words

So this is pretty simple on the surface, but it's incredibly personal to me and it resonates with a lot of my readers because I get a lot of comments on it specifically.

It comes from my own experience with the death of a family member, and for days afterwards looking around and seeing people going about their lives as if mine hadn't just fallen apart. I remember thinking how insane it made me feel, but how eventually life returned to normal for me too.

So when a beloved character died in that story, that was the only way I could start the next chapter. There was no evolution of the line, no planning. It was just continuing the story the way the characters were continuing their life. And isn't that crazy?

32. What is a line from a poem/novel/fanfic etc that you return to from time and time again? How did you find it? What does it mean to you?

In a previous ask I mentioned a line from Down to Agincourt by Seperis--"I'd bring all of Creation to its knees for your pleasure," [Cas] breathes and means every terrifying word.

I've never read a Cas line so Cas, before or since. I don't know if I'll ever re-read that story, but I'll occasionally go back and reread that scene, just to feel that line hit me again.

And there's a line from a song that I'm going to tattoo on my body someday. The song is called Feels Like by Jared & The Mill, and in the chorus it says "Even stars fight their own gravity", and for me it means fighting against my baser nature, my weaknesses, the dark parts of my personality, and things that were trained into me by a bigoted society. It means hope and light :)

(Also, imagine Destiel or JonMartin while listening to it lol)

34. Thoughts on the Oxford comma, Go:

#slytherkins #ask box meme

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