#im mad and sad and all of that stuff at once | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

gorgeouslypink · 10 months

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HIIII PINK!!! When I heard you were leaving I was so sad I even started crying and started to doubt myself on entering the void. I was like “how tf am I going to get into the void without pink???” I started procrastinating reading some of your post basically stalking ur page staying up til 4 in the morning (I was desperate 😭). I realized that I already read all of ur post, nd I just was surprised on how much time I wasted trying to get into the void. And I always dreamt abt putting a success story in your inbox. I already had all the knowledge i needed so what’s the point of more? I deleted tumblr and thought of anything that could help me get in the void. I did SATS while listening to my subliminal playlist, i daydreamed abt the void and my desires for fun, i affirmed for my void concept randomly throughout the day, feeling of the wish fulfilled, listened to delta waves when I was abt to sleep, and I meditated once a day for 10 mins. Meditation was optional but whateva 🤷‍♀️. I ONLY DID THAT FOR THREE FREAKING DAYS. And Im still mad at myself for wasting time procrastinating for 9 months. I was going to take a nap and I was in a drowsy state, so might as well affirm for the void right? I started saying affs like “I’m in the void”, etc etc. Once I started affirming, everything was just calm Yk? My body wanted to move but it was like it couldn’t cause the state I was in was calm asf. So I closed my eyes and just repeated the affs in my head over and over and over until I got this feeling like as if my body was floating, then I payed attention to it for a split second then ignored It after. I kept on affirming then I felt like I was being pulled then let go and it was as if I was falling. Everything got darker and quieter. So then I got scared and jumped because that scared me soo bad (I’m a easy person to scare 😔). After that, I felt like I was actually a master at the void, I took a nap again and I had the same feeling but when I felt like I fell I kept my calm. Then I couldn’t hear my fan which was louddd, I opened my eyes to total darkness, I was scared for two seconds and realized I was in the void!! Ngl I had a whole list set up with my desires and I was ready to affirm and goooo!!! But I realized how calm the void is and stayed there for what felt like 5 minutes. I did affirm I had all my desires and that I was able to wake up in the void under 5 seconds. When I woke up from the void it was 9 pm and I took a nap at 2!!! I woke up with all of my desires nd shi. (I would explain in more detail in how I got in and stuff like that but I was in a rush and didn’t want to make this too long 😀)

BUT THANK YOU SMM PINK, IM GOING TO MISS U SM. YOU HAVE BEEN A REALLY BIG HELP WITH MY VOID JOURNEY, I TRULY APPRECIATE EVERYTHING U HAVE DONE FOR THIS COMMUNITY, MAKE SURE TO ENJOY UR SELF 💗💗💖💖💖💗💕

✌️😼

Hi love!!! Omgosh I'm so proud of you! This is so cute and you deserve this so much and I'm genuinely happy for you. 💗

#void state #void success

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anadiasmount · 2 months

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imagine having an argument with jude and giving him attitude all day but he’s just so patient and so during your night routine while doing skin care or smth he’s all “darling im so sorry…” blah blah blah but then lectures you in a loving way to not ignore him and instead talk your feelings out 💋

okay but why would this be me?? i will hold onto that grudge until i feel time is right 😔🤞🏻this is slightly longer, and not proofread!! but like always hope you enjoy😘

your hands are interlocked together. well… kinda. his is fully locked with yours, fingers wrapped on your knuckles as your hand is just in place and fingers spread out. he’d been begging for your attention. a small smile, tiny meep, or even a small nudge from you. but you refused to even look at him. saving whatever you had to say in you to further cause tension in the car.

“y/n?”

“don’t talk to me. you might even forget what i’ll say the second i’m done speaking…”

“i want to talk it out! i wanna communicate that with you!”

“yet you didn’t care when i did… i don’t care jude!”

you forgot what you were even arguing about. it was just now you being petty and paying back like all those times he had done to you. clearly it was affecting him as he started to send you text messages to get a reaction. once again he was met with nothing. jude frowning and looking away like you were.

he knew if he removed his hand from yours he maybe would’ve gotten something at of you, but he knew how close and attached you were so jude retreated the idea, not wanting to face an even more upset and angry y/n. if there was jude one thing hated was seeing you mad, sad, upset, anything, because of him. knowing he was the reason he hated it.

of course jude hadn’t forgot what you were arguing about. you had insisted and told him repeatedly about the brunch date you had in morning with some other friends, to take out the trash out before the next day so it wouldn’t pile up, and to simply put away the clothes he had laying around.

jude knew it was to forget about the planned brunch date, but the other stuff he found slightly immature, even though he wouldn’t ever admit that to you. it obviously wasn’t okay to you, and the tone of voice he also spoke didn’t sit right with him. he was under a lot of pressure but if he had done what he was asked at first he wouldn’t be in the position.

jude got out quickly, opening the door for you as you stepped out and walked into the house. jude was about to pay the driver when he told him you had done so already. jude thanked him, rolling his eyes once he saw the front door open and you taking your boots off and heading upstairs.

“y/n? can we talk now?” he asked sighing and covering his face with his hand. “i don’t know? are you going to remember what i’ll have to say? or is it gonna be forgotten like our plans from today? the chores i laid for you? hmm, i vote yes! so no. i don’t want to talk to you,” you say sarcastic, crossing your arms and walked off, ignoring the plead from jude.

jude huffed in his place, becoming frustrated with your attitude and side remarks. it was clear you weren’t going to let it go. so now he was faced with also ignoring you cause he was mad or let you have you’d raided space and talk it out later.

jude being the inpatient and clingy boyfriend he was, gave it an hour before going into the living room where you scrolled on your phone. he couldn’t but you did, so you got up and went to the kitchen, grabbing a snack and sitting in the island. jude of course threw his hands in the air frustrated. you had to hold back the laugh paying attention to the get ready with me video on your phone.

later on when you went upstairs he followed up a few minutes after, seeing you snuggled up in your soft blanket reading a book with your glasses on. he approached you, but you then got up and walked off again on him, going downstairs and laid on the couch. jude clenched his jaw and laughed loudly. he had enough, all he wanted was to apologize and make it up to you.

he watched from afar, as your eyes kept shutting and opened again, many time before yawning and walking up the stairs again. jude had taken you silent treatment and showered, got ready for bed. not because he want to pay you back, but to finally talk with you. one thing you both agreed on was never going to sleep when either one was upset.

you had heard jude come up after setting the alarm system and ensuring everything was cleaned, locked, and lights turned off. you placed your book back on the shelf, your hair going into a messy updo as jude came to the door, bring to waters and your cup of tea. your heart warmed up, feeling bad for ignoring him the entire night when it was the only night together.

in all honesty you felt like he deserved it. it got to the point where he was clearly forgetting about you and what you said around him, feeling like a presence rather than his actual girlfriend. you didn’t want to seem like a bother but he was making you feel like one, and you hated it more than anything.

jude sat on the bathroom countertop, biting his nails as he watched you change out from your day clothes into your pjs. part of him felt like he won when you grabbed his shirt and put it on, the quickly remembered you were still mad at him. you looked down the entire time, a sad flint in your eyes as you started to take your makeup off.

he watched you rub and rub the cotton pad along your face, the water running as you used your nightly cleanser, the jiggle of the towel rack to pat your face dry. “i refuse to go to sleep knowing you’re still mad at me…” jude said making you stop brush your teeth and look up in the mirror. “okay then. all forgiven…” you shrugged, spitting out the excess hearing jude groan.

“please y/n! i’m trying to talk here. i’m being serious when i say i refuse to get on our bed, and you not even spanking a glance at me,” he said upset, getting up from the counter and over towering you. you said nothing and finished brushing your teeth.

you grabbed your last step of your skin care routine, looking up and breathing a bit deeper than before, controlling your emotions because you hated crying in front of people. “you really upset me today jude… for the first time ever i was starting to question if you ever paid attention to me or if i was being clingy…” you softly chucked.

jude immediately winced and got soft, going behind you and hugging your waist. the tight hold almost making you break down in tears before you could even speak. “i hate when you do that to me. it’s not the first time but it makes me feel like i’m not even there! i’m just a ghost or unwanted person in my own home!”

“i never ever, want to make you feel like that. especially in our home y/n! i can’t describe how incredibly sorry i am for making you feel that way. i had no idea and it’s absolutely horrible i know i know. i never wanted to make you feel uninvited or like you couldn’t say anything around me,” jude said behind your, his thumbs stroking the material of the shirt.

“i get you have a lot going on, believe me i do, but you have no right to embarrass me like that jude,” you say with eyes closed, jude nodding his head and then turning you around. “i know darling, i know. i can promise you right this second it won’t ever happen again! it was incredibly selfish and overall i hurt the person that means the world to me,” you felt his trembling hands and lips to your forehead.

“please don’t ever make me feel like that. like i have to overthink what i say, wear, think! nothing hurts more in the world then getting ignored by the person you love most,” you spoke softly, voice still laced with a tint of pain. “i understand baby. i promise i do pay attention and i do hear you,” jude spoke.

“did you really or is-”

“y/n please…”

“okay i’m sorry, i swear i’m done!” you giggle, jude bringing you impossibly closer to him. “i want you to talk to me rather than ignore me. i would rather you scream and yell angrily at how mad you are than have you say nothing to me for the whole evening,” jude said making you look up and nod, agreeing with him.

“i kid you not, i was ready to buy you the full bookstore and bring you a serenade to apologize,” he exaggerated making you laugh and look up at him once again. “not knowing how you’re feeling is the worst stress, especially cause of me… so please don’t make me go through that again…”

“don’t give me the reason too and i won’t,” you remind him, pointing your finger in his face to make things clear. jude saluted letting you know he understands and will play from the rules from now on. “okay now kiss me, because i really really really missed you today…”

“it would be my pleasure. i’m going to take you to bed first, show my beautiful girlfriend why she deserves every ounce of my attention…”

#judey thoughts 5️⃣#jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham blurb

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snowyquokka · 3 months

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DRAINED

bf felix x gn reader

cw: hurt/comfort, angst, mentions of anxiety, stress, crying, fluff (maybe?), swearing, overworked felix, shitty grammar

wc: 0.6k

a.n - my first attempt at hurt/comfort. did i do well? <3

dont hate me but i think i prefer writing angst rather than anything else

✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧

Felix sighs and all but throws himself on top of you as you sit on the couch. “Hi, baby.” you giggle as he nuzzles his face into your neck.

“What’s the matter, Sunshine?” you say as you run your fingers through his soft blonde hair.

“Exhausted, overwhelmed, sad,” he lists against your neck. You always feel bad when he comes home from the studio or after he’s toured. Your boyfriend is constantly tiring himself, working as hard as he possibly can. You wish he would take care of himself once in a while. Felix says that’s what you’re for anyways.

You press a kiss to his temple and hum.

“Why are you sad, love?” He sighs and snuggles closer to you.

“I kept fucking up my part. Redid it five times.” you can feel him pout. Another example of him pushing himself to his limits is when he frustrates himself to the point where nothing satisfies him. He could go hours with many fantastic takes but will insist on retrying it until it’s absolutely perfect.

“I’m sure you did amazing,” Felix squeezes you tighter and inhales deeply.

“‘m sorry,” he says, breaking the comfortable silence. You pull back enough to be able to see his face. He has no makeup on, his freckles on full display. Sometimes when you’re bored you’ll pretend like they’re constellations and connect them in your head.

“Sorry for what, Lix?”

“For bothering you with this kinda stuff. It's not important and I don't want to worry you.” Your heart plummets down to the floor.

“Why wouldn’t it be important to me, love? If you’re upset, I’m upset. Your problems are mine.” you kiss his forehead softly. Felix shifts in your arms so he’s at eye level.

You hold his hands while you watch a single tear stream down his cheek. He immediately wipes it away and displays a small, but not reassuring, smile.

“Thank you,” he sniffles and leans his forehead against yours.

“Of course, Sunshine. I’m always going to be here.”

TWO DAYS LATER

You’re sitting in bed watching a random movie when your phone dings.

my only sunshine <3: im gonna be a little late tonight

my only sunshine <3: im sorry. i love you ❤️

you: its okay baby. let me know when ur on ur way !! i love you too

You sigh and lock your phone. It’s not like you’re mad at him or anything of that sort. It’s just difficult watching him drain himself again and again. No matter what you say, he always goes back to overworking himself.

Tears that you hadn’t noticed were brimming fall down your cheeks. You turn everything off and close your eyes, inhaling Felix’s scent from the pillows.

You wake to the sound of the front door closing and glance at the alarm clock,

5:08am

Fuck. Is he just getting home?

You climb out of bed and wander into the living room where you find your boyfriend sitting with his face in his hands, he immediately notices you. He had turned the small lamp in the corner on, allowing you to take in his disheveled state.

His long blonde hair tousled from his fingers being ran through it. His eyes bloodshot from what seemed like hours of crying and lack of sleep. His hands shake and his leg bounces up and down in an anxious manner.

“Baby?” you whisper with worry laced in your voice prompting Felix’s body to almost automatically rack with sobs. You quickly pull him into you and wrap your arms around his figure, the only sound present in the room being both of your cries blended together.

tags: @godslino

divider: @chaeneuu

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dabuggh3 · 2 months

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Im sad and touch deprived so I wrote this ⭐️enjoyy!! <3

You and Hamzah weren’t having a good day. You guys got into an argument early in the morning about petty stuff, due to stress. You went to work and he went over to Martins to film. Through out the day you guys didn’t speak at all, no text, no phone call, nothing.

While having your lunch break you thought about the argument and it just got you more mad. Through out the day you were silent and just straight faced. Some of your close coworkers even asked you if you were okay. But you just brushed them off and said you didn’t get a lot of sleep.

It was around 8 and you were clocking out of work, you head out to your car and just sat there for a little, “ He didn’t even text me if he was going home yet” you thought to yourself but usually he came home later at night anyways. You play your music and start to drive, half way through the drive you and Hamzah’s favorite song starts to play. Your face softens and you think how stupid the argument was, you love him too much to stay mad over something petty.

Before you head home you decide to stop by Nanis gelato to get some for him and you. You get to your apartment and put the gelato in the fridge, you wanted to wait for him. You get out of your work clothes and get into something comfortable. You clean up the apartment as you watch, 10 Things I Hate About You. You hear your phone ring. It was a text from Hamzah, “ I’m going home” you smile,“ Okay drive safe”. You finish cleaning and decide to start cooking something.

You were still deciding dinner, when you hear the door open. You turn and see Hamzah smiling softly, “ Hi babe”. You look at him,“ Hi baby”, he turns and reaches for something. He turns back around with flowers, “ I’m sorry about this morning I was being stupid and petty, I’m sorry”, he says locking eyes with you, while fidgeting with his hat. You smile, “I’m sorry too, it was dumb”, you walk up to him, giving him a hug.

Hamzah puts the flowers down on the counter and hugs you harder. He turns his head and kisses your check repeatedly, wanting to hear you laugh. You guys let go of each other and you give him a kiss. “ Thank you for the flowers, I got you something too”. You walk over to the fridge and showing him the gelato. “ What, nooo no way” he says excited with a smile, “ thank you” he kisses your forehead giving you another hug.

He leans on the counter facing you,“ So how did it go with Martin”. “ It was good, we finished the video” “ That’s good, oh I was just thinking of what to make for dinner, what do you think? you want anything specific ?” you turn to look at him. He looks at you making that dumb face he makes when he has something planned, “ Do you want to go out to eat?, a date.” “What, yess duh” you say. “ Perfect then go get dressed”

You and Hamzah go out to eat at a new place you’ve been dying to eat at. You guys talk about your days and laugh about dumb things. “ No he said that and I just had to sit there with a straight face”. You laugh, “ You know dam welllll”. You guys head back home blasting music. Once your home, you guys lay on the couch eating your gelato. “ Can I try some” “ Of course”

It’s the little things fr 😭. Also what song would you guys have be you and Hamzah’s ( hope that makes sense lol)

#hamzahthefantasticxfanfic #hamzahthefantastic #fanfic #hamzah x reader #slushy noobz #hamzah #thinkingabouthamzah24/7 #hamzah x y/n #hamzahfanfiction #hamzah hc #Spotify

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ickadori · 1 month

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Im back, but listen hdhskkssk ITS NOT FAIRRRRRRRR especially bc when i first re found ur blog, i was suuuuper into ur yuuji stuff, i personally cant do poly bc im possessive AS FUCK so even tho i know ur suku x ura poly was extremely popular i never read it, and i think i rmb one thing u wrote with him and bloody knuckles getting head but LISTEN, kuna was never on my radar like that but this!!!!! What did u do to meeeeeee. I really loved the yuuji x mean reader where she was a sadist kinda and then yuuji would like tlk down to her and i loved ur 'kuna taking over yuuji' fics but this new one......you made it too unfair like yuuji is just a boy but kuna is all MAN omgggg and i try to steer clear of romance routes in this bc sukuna is a SLUT but (head in hands) he would help yuuji choose a promise ring for reader and the night she comes over and yuuji gives it to her, sukuna is there in the kitchen or smth when she goes for water and reader is like 🙄 outta the way, but sukuna slides over a box with a ring in it- so tasteful and elegant, clearly fuckin expensive, and it makes the tacky little thing yuuji gave you look pathetic in comparison STOP MEEEEE SOMEONE TAKE MY PHONE AWAYYYY PLS AND HE WOULD LOOK SO SERIOUS WHEN HE GIVES IT TO YOU AHHH HE ACTS LIKE ITS JUST SEX BUT HE CANT STOP THINKING ABT U 24.7

OK OK IM DONE I NEED TO STOP THIS MADNESS NOW

choso bbg anon (gaslighting myself)

YEAHHHHHHHHHH SUKUNA FKRS RISE not you switching sides bc he talked a little mean 🤭 hehe poor choso 😭

[cws] infidelity. fem reader.

“Are you sure you like it?”

“I love it, Yuji!” You grin, stretching up to plant a sticky kiss on his cheek as you say it. “I do, really. It’s so cute.” And it is! You hold your hand out, admiring the ring encircling your finger, and an excited shriek leaves you as you give him another kiss, this one landing on his lips instead.

He kisses you back instantly, arms locking around your waist as he gently sways the two of you back and forth. You break the kiss to smile at him, and he mirrors it easily, a faint pink hue settling in his cheeks.

“I’m glad you like it - I’ve been looking at rings for the past month! I wanted to make sure it was perfect for you.” Your stomach fills with butterflies at the soft look in his eyes. “Perfect ring for my perfect girl.”

“You’re such a cornball.” You tease, hands moving to rest against his biceps. They flex underneath your touch before relaxing. “Did your last girlfriend like that corny act?”

“Dunno, I don’t bother remembering any other girls but you.”

“Great answer.”

“Yeah? Great enough for another kiss?”

“Hmm,” you pretend to ponder it, lips quirking up into an amused smile when his eyes zero in on your mouth. “I guess so…it wouldn’t be nice after you’ve gotten me this ring and took me to such a nice restaurant, after all.” His hands slip from your waist down to your ass, and a soft gasp leaves your mouth when he grips it and hauls you up against him.

“Mm,” he hums and then his mouth is on yours. You playfully nip at his bottom lip, getting a grin and a breathy chuckle in return, and he nips you back in retaliation. You let out a dramatic ‘ow’, making a show of frowning your eyebrows up, and he bumps his nose against yours. “Sorry, baby, lemme kiss it better.” He pecks at your bottom lip once, twice, and then he’s pulling it into his mouth.

Your lower back meets the kitchen counter, and just as Yuji is moving to heft you up onto it, the sound of the front door being pushed open breaks the two of you out of your spell.

Yuji sighs, lips parting from yours with a sad pop, and you laugh under your breath at his dejected look. Sukuna rounds the corner to the kitchen a second later, and his gaze moves to Yuji first before sliding over to you. You immediately avert your gaze and turn your head, cheek nestling against Yuji’s chest as you give him a gentle nudge, signaling that you’re ready to retreat back to his room.

But, of course, Sukuna has to open his mouth and halt that process.

“You two going somewhere?”

“To bed.” You quip.

“Oh, your favorite pastime.”

Your head whips around to face him, eyes narrowed and lips turned down, and he smirks as he heads to the fridge. “You’re a real asshole, Sukuna. You know that?”

“Hey.” Yuji intervenes, and you huff before pulling out of his embrace, arms moving to cross over your chest. Sukuna eyes flicker down, beer now in hand, and snag on the ring on your finger.

“You gave it to her.”

“Just today.” Yuji grins, moving behind you to loop his arms around your shoulders, his chin resting atop your head. “Gave it to her at dinner - and she does like it, you dick. I knew she would.” He loudly kisses your cheek, and Sukuna keeps his gaze on you as he raises the can of beer to his mouth and takes a slow sip. He starts at your feet, at the strappy sandals that you decided to wear today, and then he moves up your legs, the skin bare due to the skirt you wear. He looks over your shirt, the way it cuts down low into your cleavage, and you shift on your feet as goosebumps blossom on your skin.

He finally settles on your eyes, and you swallow hard, body pushing back into Yuji as he pushes into you, a telltale sign of his arousal hot and hard against your lower back.

“Looks good.” Sukuna rumbles, eyes still on yours, and you flush under his attention, skin turning hot. Yuji kisses behind your ear and your skin burns hotter. “Real good.” He breaks the gaze to look at his brother, who’s currently too engrossed in trailing kisses across your skin to pay attention to what’s being said, and then he’s gone down the hall and into his room.

You finish rubbing in the last bit of your facial moisturizer and blow out a breath, your hands reaching above your head as you stretch. There’s an ache in your lower back, courtesy of your boyfriend, and you go to rub the spot as you pull open the bathroom door, intending to go back to his bedroom.

“Oh!” You jump at the sight of Sukuna on the other side, and he crowds you back in, hands on your waist as he pushes the door closed with his foot. “Ryomen, what’re you doing?” You hiss.

“Saying hey.” He murmurs, and then he’s swooping down to smack his lips against yours. The kiss is rough and fast, and you fight to keep up as he licks into your mouth, one of his hands sliding underneath his brother’s shirt and cupping you between your thighs.

“You come?” He pulls back from the kiss, teeth biting into the fat of your cheek, and your hands move to grab his wrist.

“Yeah.”

“You wanna come again?”

“Ye—no. Ryo, stop, he’s still awake.” He kisses at his teeth, palm mashing up into your panty covered cunt, and you moan into his ear. “Ryomen.” He lets out a grunt, and with another hard kiss he’s moving his hand from between your legs and into his pocket.

“I got you something.”

“Well, aren’t you sweet.” You take a step back, not trusting either of you to keep your hands to yourself, and you tug on the hem of the shirt you’re wearing, eyes taking in the way the muscles in Sukuna’s arms flex in his muscle tee.

His hand comes out of his pocket with a little black box, and your eyebrows shoot up when you recognize the brand as the same one that Yuji had just purchased your promise ring from. “I don’t want that.”

“Don’t give a fuck, you’re taking it.”

“No.”

He stalks towards you, and you smack at his hands as he moves to grab you. “No, I don’t want it. Do you know how disrespectful that is?”

“More disrespectful than me cumming in your ass?”

You gape.

He snags ahold of your hand, and you blink as he slides a ring on your finger, placing it right above Yuji’s. You don’t want to look at it, but you do, and you gape again, a soft call of his name leaving your mouth as you raise your hand to get a better look at it.

“…it’s…” Beautiful. And it is, and it makes you feel incredibly guilty, because Yuji’s ring is cute and pretty and you do like it, but this… “I really hate you.”

“Yeah?” He grins. “You must like it then.”

“I don’t.”

“You do.”

“I don’t, asshole.” You go to storm past him only for him to grab your bicep and tug you back. “Ryo—”

This kiss is softer, gentler, one he’s never given you, and it leaves you breathless and warm in the face when he pushes you toward the door. “Night.” He says, and you barely react when his palm makes contact with your ass. “Don’t stay up late - you’ve got an exam in the morning.”

“Huh? Oh. Okay. Goodnight.” You stand there dumbly, still stuck on the kiss along with the ring.

“Get out.” He pushes you again. “Dumbass.”

You snap out of it, giving him a nasty look as you do. “You’re the dumbass, dumbass.”

#sukuna x reader

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conundrumsofphilosophy · 1 month

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hi!! how do you think each merc would react if they got stuck on an elevator? maybe reader could be there too and started panicking, how would they deal with it? ^^

ANON I LOVE THIS. this is such a fun prompt im obsessed. sorry this took literally months . college is hard

scout

- he's immediately mad. kicking the wall and repeatedly pushing buttons

- ends up pacing and freaking anyone else in the elevator out

- when he starts yelling for help it's over

- if you start panicking it'll just make him panic because he doesn't know what to do to help you, he just gets louder

soldier

- slamming on the doors with his entire body weight. does NOT realize the doors will open to an elevator shaft and not a safe floor

- SCREAMING for help. he's not panicked really just very impatient. it's very un-american to get trapped in an elevator.

- if he's in there too long he'll wear himself out and sit on the floor and pout for a while. sad sad puppy dog man

- if you're freaking out he'll just yell in your face which will not help but he is yelling reassuring things. he just has zero volume control.

pyro

- definitely just saying what the hell over and over again. not yelling just muttering to themself and being mostly unintelligible

- kicks the door a little bit but doesn't get overly violent

- mostly just dismayed at the situation. will sit down and fiddle with whatever they have on them, tinker with whatever weapons anyone has. patient

- will sit there in silence with you and help you breathe deep if you're panicking. mutters kind things which you can't understand but he's trying

engineer

- pops open the panel immediately and starts fiddling with wires and trying to fix it himself. not at all worried that he might break it worse

- throws stuff if he can't get it working again. very much with the dangits and dammits and dagnabbits

- starts yelling for help but gets bored of it pretty quick and just huffs and puffs

- if you're freaked out he'll calm himself down though. he'd hate to be part of the reason you're freaking out

demo

- he doesn't even notice at first. he's just drinking and smiling.

- once he realizes it's been a loooong time in the elevator. he'll sort of just poke at some buttons, kick at the door a little bit. surprisingly nonchalant about it

- if he's drunk enough he'll start to prepare to blow the door open you gotta make him not do that. because it would most certainly not help

- if you're freaking out he'll stare at you for a while before he even says anything because he doesn't know what would help. he isn't helpful at all

heavy

- so normal about. he is chilling. if someone else has an idea that requires brute force he will contribute but won't initiate it himself he's perfectly content to just wait it out

- i like to think he brings a little paperback with him all the time and he will just sit down and read

- might even fall asleep. his snoring would make anyone else in the elevator want to die though

- probably the best person to have with you if you're freaking out he can provide anything you need. need to be grounded? bone crushing hug. need reassuring words? might be a little broken in english but he's got em.

medic

- gone into hysterics i think. especially if there are more than three people in the elevator he needs out right now

- snaps at anyone that tries to get him to help with anything he's like. sitting in the corner rocking back and forth

- he's literally completely 100% normal the second you get out it's like nothing happened

- he's not helping you if you're freaking out unless staring at you menacingly is helping

sniper

- doesn't care literally whatsoever he's used to being in enclosed spaces for hours at a time

- you better believe he's pissing in jars if he has them.

- will help with the Escape Plan if he deems it smart enough

- if you're freaking out he'll just sit there but he thinks it's helping

spy

- soooooo frustrated there are much better things he'd rather be doing than being trapped with You People

- filling the elevator with cigarette smoke much to the chagrin of everyone in it. he does not care whatsoever

- gets bored quickly and will sit and flip his knife endlessly while still chainsmoking

- if you're freaking out he'll probably just say something he thinks is kind but just makes you feel worse

#doe's drabbles (request)#doe's drabbles (headcanons)#tf2 #tf2 engineer #tf2 medic #tf2 scout #tf2 demoman #tf2 heavy #tf2 pyro #tf2 spy #tf2 sniper #tf2 soldier #tf2 headcanons #tf2 mercs #anon

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my-castles-crumbling · 1 month

Note

I have a problem Cas… I think im in love.

Okay so, there’s this girl. We’ve been best friends like 5 years. I mean i’ve always- okay I don’t know how to explain this.

I’m basically a fan-fiction come to fucking life.

So i’m Demisexual, and last year I decided to come out to my family. I don’t know if other Demi ppl have preferences of gender, but I don’t. Honestly labels confuse me. I’m not sure if technically i’m Biromantic and Demisexual but hey, the point is- and what I explained to my family- that i’d be open to dating anyone.

Basically i was telling them I wasn’t straight. (Obviously Demisexual is also about sexual activities and people and stuff but I wasn’t gonna try and explain to my parents that I don’t really get attracted to random ppl- cause they don’t get it- and I didn’t want to accidentally start talking abt sex).

So anyway, they were not happy. Have you watched Brooklyn Nine-Nine? There’s this clip where the character Rosa comes out as Bi and her parents are like “That’s okay, since you can still date a man and marry a man and be normal” and they were like that for me (i’m a girl in case that wasn’t obvious- so they wanted me to date a man).

And I didn’t really care to be honest. I had an equal level of straight friends to queer friends, I felt suitably in both worlds. I truly love my family. They’ve always been good to me. But they did imply if I did end up with a girl, they wouldn’t want to meet/know her.

Not to mention the religious trauma. I spent a shit ton of time listening to ppl tell me that same-sex marriage and relationships are a “sin”. Hell- there was this one rlly lovely women at church when I was like 9, but she got kicked out when they congregation found out she was a lesbian. (Okay- not kicked out but like bullied into leaving).

So it was fine for me to accept that I could potentially date a women since i’ve never felt immediate attraction to anyone, it never felt totally real.

BUT NOW I HAVE A PROBLEM. So my best friend (who is also a girl) of 5 years. She’s amazing. She’s literally the funniest person i’ve ever met, she’s so generous and has helped me so much, and she’s just adorable. She’s like fucking sunshine. And ngl, I don’t often like people who are so cheery all the time because it feels fake and I like people around me to be honest.

But she just, she has this way of finding the beauty in the stupidest things and it’s so cute. We got splashed by a car the other day, drenched both our outfits, and instead of being mad, she got all excited and had us do a photoshoot in our crazy soaked clothes, and then got all excited that we could cuddle under a duvet and watch a movie with snacks once we got home cause apparently that’s the only acceptable thing people can do after being covered in water (which is exactly what we did).

And she’s not unreasonably happy, you know? Like when people try to cheer people up at bad times and make everyone more sad, she’s not like that. Whenever i’m upset, or mad, she’ll doodle these cute little flowers on coloured paper and write things she loves about the world on the back of them, and once i’m done ranting abt how annoying the world is, she’ll give it to me and smile. She has the best smile.

I have this jar, I write the date on them and put the paper in the jar.

We’ve been best friends five years, she started doing that like four years ago and i’ve had the jar pretty much from the start.

It’s always been easy to be around her. We sort of knew each other for like a year, and then I blinked, and we were best friends. I read all the books she gives me even though the plot is super cheesy cause she loves talking about them, I learnt how to bake all her favourite snacks her mum made, cause she’s pretty far from home and honestly a tragic baker. And she cooks dinner (don’t ask how she can’t bake to save her life but is the most incredible cook, it’s unbelievably ridiculous) for us a lot, she learnt to make my fav food.

We technically live together, we’re at the final year of uni (maybe not tho depending on our next courses, I dunno) so we’ve been living together this year, but before that, I basically spent most of my time around her place anyway.

So yeah, we’re friends. But I realised a few months ago that i’m pretty, definitely, in love with her. I think i’ve felt like this for about a year and it just hadn’t quite clicked yet.

(I had this awful day and came back to our place to see her genuinely painting our wall a different colour of white. She paints as a hobby and accidentally splatter a ton of blue paint on the wall and freaked out and tried buying white paint to cover it when it wouldn’t wash of and she was sat on the floor with white paint all over her and the wall still blue.

She told me the story and I burst out laughing. I explained you often need white primer first, to cover the blue, and then to buy the correct shade of white, since ours was sort of chill white and she’d bought bright white.

It’s the type of thing that would’ve annoyed me so much at the end of such a tough day, but because it was her, I just found it adorable. That’s when it clicked, I love her. She noticed I was tired immediately and felt bad cause she realised i’d had a bad day. I said this cheered me up, cause it did. Then we made dinner together and spent the night reading on the sofa with music on.

We went to the shop the next day to get the correct stuff and luckily our wall is back to looking almost exactly the same).

So yeah, I love her. Plus like, being demi, I don’t usually find ppl attractive… I mean i’ve always known she’s aesthetically pleasing, she has good fashion sense and stuff, but like, I tend to view all people as the same sort of level of attractive. BUT NOW ITS LIKE- SHES FUCKING BEAUTIFUL. It’s kind of annoyingly actually. How is everyone not spending all day gazing at her eyes. They’re fucking caramel, like a book character. She says they’re brown but she’s wrong. In dull lighting they seem brown but they’re like dark orange (amber i guess) with little hues of green, but in the sun they’re really bright and caramel and warm.

She’s a lesbian btw. So theoretically I’ve got a shot. Also, i’ve always been good at reading people and I know she’s had like a small crush on me at least twice in our friendship. You can tell sometimes.

But recently, it’s been a wreck. I’m so distracted cause i’m in love with her I can’t think, and my friends keep telling me she loves me back but I can’t keep my head on straight long enough to try and tell.

But. If I do get my head out of my ass and tell her and she does end up wanting to date me, what the fuck am I supposed to do then. Cause if it does work out, i’m pretty sure it’ll last.

My parents never totally liked her (they probably saw this coming- but I think in the homophobic, all queer ppl date each other, way and not the, they’re meant to be together, way) and if ended up having to tell them i’m actually dating a women, they’d be pissed.

I always thought i’d end up with man, since it’s easier. No religious guilt about that. But I can put aside my own brains stupidity for her. But I can’t change my parents. But aside from this, they’re literally amazing. But I also know them and I truly don’t think they’ll change.

All my friends having been saying me and her should’ve been dating this entire time. I don’t know, I like to think now would be kinda perfect. I always knew she was gonna be in my life forever, I guess I just got so used to imagining myself with a man I forgot she was an option? That I could be with her romantically forever. You know, assuming she wants to date me.

(We’ll see about that. I’m really not sure. But i’m totally shit at keeping my own secrets so i’m planning to tell her soon if not just for the sake of my own sanity. All my friends say she’ll reciprocate, if she doesn’t, then I guess i’ll go from there, she’s not the type to be weird or bothered that we live together despite it. And if she does… then I have to decide what to do next. My other best friend is literally always right when it comes to our friends dating lives, and she has faith we’ll end up together, so we’ll see I guess)

But if she does. If she does I’ll have to get into it with my family. I don’t want to lie to them. And I know I shouldn’t judge, but I honestly don’t think they’ll change their minds. I think they’ll say I can come visit whenever, but not bringing my partner. And I won’t want that. And we’ll all argue.

I never liked knowing my parents didn’t accept this side of me, but I guess I never considered it would be an actual problem i’d have to deal with someday.

I spend a lot of my time trying to figure myself out. I haven’t had the easiest path in life. But with her, it’s so easy. It’s easier to understand what I like, it’s easier to talk about things, and I fully trust her not to be weird. Or leave. Or get mad for nothing. I don’t have to walk on eggshells around her. I trust her. We don’t argue much. We have, what she calls, three different type of arguments.

One, “bad mood argues”. She finds it so hilarious that it rhymes. You have to say it with the syllables. Bad-Mood Ar-Gues. We have these cookies in the freezer that we make every month. If one of us is having a bad day, we cook a few cookies to eat and I bought this dumb fridge magnet of a cookie to put on the fridge to signify it’s a cookie worthy bad day.

Another one is “justifiable anger”. That doesn’t happen much. When we first met, she had this tendency to not tell me when I did something that upset her, and it’d spiral, and i’d be mad she wasn’t talking about why she was mad. So we have a rule to always talk about problems, even the little things. For example, her yelling into the phone to her family for hours while i’m trying to study- she has planned days now, so I can go to the library or she can go out if necessary, or keep the convo below 45 min, her mums like half deaf so she does have to shout, but it’s also VERY loud. Basically we comprise. And make sure no anger builds up.

The third type of argument is, what our friends call, “married idiots”. As in, she shouldn’t use the siri talk thingy while driving cause it never understands what she’s trying to say and so I get jumbled texts that mean nothing and then she thinks she’s told me something she hasn’t told me. She’s nearly understanding that one 🤦‍♀️ And you know, the classic colour of something argument (it’s purple- she’s wrong).

Anyway. I forgot my point. Oh yeah, everything’s easier with her. I feel comfortable. If i’m being totally honest… i’m pretty sure if I ask her out, she’ll say yes. Like 80% sure. Im just scared to fuck this up, and cause family problems. Cause yeah, she’s worth the drama, but also, it’s her that’ll be being insulted right? She very likely won’t be allowed in my house. I don’t want this to ruin what we already have.

So yeah. That. I could really do with some advice ❤️

Hi <3

If you do not ask this girl out, I will physically pass away.

Like...I'm not usually so pushy with asks, but you're describing a relationship, hon. This is a relationship. I'm not sure if you follow me because of the Marauders, but you two are literally Wolfstar, And I'm shipping the two of you so hard right now.

If, for some insane reason, she turns you down, it's because she doesn't realize she's in love with you, too.

As far as your family...again, I'm going to be more blunt that usual. You're going to have to face their lack of acceptance for you at some point. It's absolutely shit that they don't accept you, but like...don't let that stop you from being with this girl. Because even if you put off their feelings now, you'll have to deal with it someday, and then you might miss out on an amazing girl.

Please update me. I need updates. I am so invested. I am DYING for updates.

God, I'm rereading all the things you wrote and I'm kicking and giggling. You two are ridiculously adorable. Please kiss her already (with consent).

I'm naming you purple anon. Please write back.

#ask #asks #ask cas #purple anon

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byizoyas · 1 year

Text

SFW | soft hcs how they tell you they like you for the first time with: childe, scaramouche, kazuha

cw: mentions of alcohol in the scaramouche’s part / ‘drunk’ reader, mentions of sex in kazuha’s and there’s a little plus in his part!

✰ CHILDE

› childe never intended to tell you. so of course the way it happened was beyond his own control

› you guys have been friends for a while and he just.. didn’t wanna ruin it yk

› but seeing you all cheerful and rambling about that stupid guy was hitting his nerves

⸻

if it weren’t for that clock behind you ticking every second, the silence growing would’ve been deadly.

childe was standing in front of you, his brows furrowed and his arms crossed against his chest. ‘w-hat did you just say ?’ you asked for him to confirm the words he just spoke; but in reality you heard it well.

‘i said, stop talking about that guy. fuck. there’s not even a single conversation we have without him getting involved now it’s fucking annoying.’

you gulped. you didn’t actually understand why he would be so mad when he could’ve just told you from the start you were annoying him.

it wasn’t like your friendship was new. he always told you when something wasn’t okay with him; so why was he almost yelling at you now.

you looked away, and you felt your cheeks burn in embarrassment. surely no one would’ve felt comfortable after that.

‘what is it ? you don’t have a conversation subject beside him ?’ he added. now he was getting irritating.

most of the time you managed to deal with childe’s mood changing, but right now, you felt like something would break between you two if you stayed here one more minute; so you took your stuff and simply went away.

no word nor gaze were addressed to him as you passed by his apartment’s door.

your stoic face despite hearing his reproaches only broke when feeling a hand seizing your wrist. you turned around, brows furrowed, only to find a pretty sad looking childe.

‘don’t leave me y/n.’ he said, his eyes looking down.

‘i’m not. you’ve been mean that’s all. i won’t deal with this any longer but im not leaving you, cut the dramatic shit already.’ you coldly replied, freeing your hand from his grip but as you were about to turn your back on him to keep walking away, he hugged you from behind.

your heart started beating faster. never once have the two of you been this close before and now he was resting on your shoulders, breathing against your skin.

‘i- i need you y/n. i can’t let you go with him.’

you took a long breath, and only now did you realize you had been holding it the whole time since he touched you. ‘what do you mean ?’

you knew what he meant. you just couldn’t realize it yet as if you needed him to use other words.

‘i love you.’ he said ‘i can’t bear it, to see you with someone else, i can’t’

there. he said it. you kinda had a strange feeling about the way he rolled up his eyes when you talked about your date. or the way he sighed while looking at his phone. you thought he was uninterested in your life.

but now that he finally confessed. all you could do was look away and think back of the times you could’ve understood it, and mentally scold yourself for not seeing it earlier.

✰ SCARAMOUCHE

› scaramouche is impulsive as fuck, so ofc his love confession wasn’t going to be something other than messy.

› he had been liking you for a while now, but as confident as he liked to think he was, he was actually terrified of his feeling being unrequited which is why he kept it to himself

› you were out with some other friends and had drank a little bit when his visit surprised you

⸻

your vision was all blurry when you and your other friends just got out of the nightclub.

‘it smells weird doesn’t it ?’ you asked them, but the only answers you got was them shrugging at you before kissing again. you looked away, sighing when realizing it would be another night of you third wheeling your friends.

you walked away from them, sitting on the first bench you found and just when you went to check your phone did you notice that the battery was dead.

you rubbed your face with your two hands before hearing a familiar voice calling out for you.

‘y/n !’ he shouted, and just when you took your hands off your face, did you see your best friend you left a few hours ago, just before going to the club.

the smile growing on your face got quickly erased when you’ve seen his expression. obviously, the man wasn’t quite happy about something and knowing him, he wouldn’t spare you.

‘are you fucking deaf ? i’ve been calling you multiple times.’ he aggressively asked.

you took out your phone from your pocket, handing it out to him expecting him to calm himself down after seeing that you had no battery. but it got worse actually.

he clenched his fists, giving you back your phone and almost throwing it at you. ‘i was fucking worried about you, there was a fire incident not so far away. i’ve walked all the way here to check if you were okay only because you’re too dumb to charge your phone before going out. fuck.’

he sat next to you, and heaved a long sigh before looking at you. your hair were messy. you didn’t smell good at all, and you had drank so much it could be seen only by looking into your eyes. but somehow he appreciated the sight.

he pulled some of your bangs behind your ears, allowing him to see your entire face.

‘why are you so fucking dumb ?’

‘and why are you so fucking annoying ? jeez, are you forced to act like that.’

‘act like what ?’

‘like my fucking boyfriend.’ you yelled back at him before bursting out in laughter. ‘look at you walking all the way down here for me, that’s pathetic, even for you.’ you said. your words were cruel, but it did not pain scaramouche.

and after he repeated many times what a dumbass you were, you thought it was okay to make fun of him too. little did you know, you actually hit a sensitive point.

only when he looked back at you without arguing back did you started to ask yourself why.

‘kuni.’ you only said, and to that he only replied with your name too. ‘don’t tell me you-’ you started, but didn’t manage to finish your sentence.

he got up from the bench, and started agitating himself, moving his hands as he talked, as if finally letting go something he had in his mind for a long time.

‘what if i like you y/n ? me ? pathetic ? look at you. you got alcohol on your hair, you smell like vodka and wine at the same time it’s suffocating. you can’t walk straight, and your voice is broken. you’ve got some nerves to talk to me like that. yes i walked all the way down here, and for what ? only to find my friend acting like a vulgar drunkard ? hell, i would’ve preferred to be in my bed right now. but i came for you, even though i wasn’t even sure to find you there, i came here because i like you and god knows why because i fucking don’t get it.’

to that monologue you only laughed. he blushed but you couldn’t see it as it was dark in the area you were in. ‘you’re a romantic one kuni.’ you kept on laughing

‘shut up.’

‘carry me home ?’ you tried requesting

‘hell no. you do you.’

only after a while did he finally accept to carry you on his back until your house. perhaps his confession was surprising and perhaps it wasn’t the best, but it was exactly like scaramouche and you never needed more than the sincerity he showed you tonight.

✰ KAZUHA

› kazuha is not shy about his own feelings, so you often talked about each other’s emotions together

› he didn’t think it’d be so hard to tell you about his love for you. perhaps he feared to ruin the bond you had created

› but he couldn’t take the risk to lose you to someone else only because he feared to face his own feelings, so he thought about how to tell you for a while and it suddenly came to him like a flash

⸻

kazuha and you had been planning that night for a while now. you specifically chose the movies you wanted to see, together so that the two of you appreciate the night.

but somehow, kazuha didn’t seem really focused on the movie. not that he was one to comment a movie, but usually when you did comment some things from time to time during it, he would chuckle or reply something.

but nothing. it was as if you were watching the movies alone.

‘kazu ?’ you asked ,looking at him instead of the screen, trying to see if he was with you.

he only hummed, his eyes glued to the screen as if he didn’t realize you, were looking at him now.

‘do you like the movie ? cause you don’t seem to be into it.’ you asked.

‘i’m hungry that’s all. coming back right away.’ your head was on his lap, and he gently moved it to the pillow he was resting his own head on, standing up from the couch the two of you had been spending the beginning of the night on.

he went towards the kitchen, turning on the lights while choosing something.

he wasn’t really hungry, but he couldn’t find a moment to tell you about his feels. an internal monologue about what to do and what to say was taking place in his mind, and in the end, he joined you without bringing any food at all.

‘weren’t you hungry ?’ you asked as he sat back next to you.

he smiled at you before tapping gently on his thighs inviting you to put your head back on it. ‘i ate something in the kitchen it’s all good now.’

‘and you brought nothing to me ? hmph.’ you fainted a pouting face before looking back at the television.

he was overthinking your words. could he be bold enough to suggest he could kiss you to give you a taste of what he had in his mouth ? he wouldn’t dare.

he didn’t even find words to say, how could he ever say such flirty things.

meanwhile, you had clicked the resume button and the movie was now playing in front of your eyes. multiple colors reflecting on the white walls of kazuha’s living room.

just when a sex scene occurred in the movie did the two of you chuckled. you weren’t teenagers anymore but there was still something special about watching these scenes with someone.

the scene seemed like it would never end, starting to make you a bit uncomfortable.

‘it seemed like it would never end huh?’

‘indeed’ kazuha giggled nervously.

the rest of the movie played and when the ending came, the two of you agreed to go to sleep.

only when you were about to sleep right next to each other on kazuha’s couch, did he decide to speak up.

you were about to fall asleep when he spoke, almost making you jump.

‘can you sleep into my arms ?’ he asked.

of course you weren’t going to deny his request. kazuha smelt good. great even. his semi long hair were soft and when you agreed and slipped yourself into his arms you wrapped your arms around his chest, playing with his red strand of hairs

‘i like you y/n’ he suddenly said. you stopped all movement, as if you didn’t hear correctly. but he spoke up again. ‘i’m gonna kiss you now.’

you couldn’t say you didn’t see it coming but it was still really surprising. in a good way of course. spending the rest of the night glued to his warm body while he was kissing you, felt like the most comforting place ever and you wished there was no end to that night.

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vamp4kaulitz · 10 months

Note

Can u please do a grumpy Tom in the mornings like how u did for bill please no smut it can be seen as any reader if u want♥️

MORNINGS WITH TOM

thank you for the request! <3

Y/N’s POV

I woke up, the sunlight barely out. I stretched and then checked the time. It was 6:30. I looked over at Tom and he was snoring slightly. I giggled slightly and took a picture on my camera and put it away. I went to brush my teeth and then wash my face too.

“Tom? Tom?” I started to wake up Tom slowly. “Mmmm..” He groaned while moving around. “Come on, you have a busy day today. We have to be there by 7:30.” I said softly and he groaned. “Give me 10 more minutes…or possibly let me sleep for eternity..” He complained while turning around. “Tommmm!” I said while shaking him. “Stopppp!” He whined and I sighed. “Fine. Want me to get georg?” I said and he groaned. “Finee!” He sighed and then woke up fully.

It was 7:25 by now and we all got on the tour bus. “Tom, can I have some of your water?” I asked while grabbing his water bottle but he snatched it away. “Nooo! You don’t deserve none.” Tom said and I sighed. “Come on, just a sip??” I pouted but he ignored me. I rolled my eyes and then got up to find another water bottle. “Bill can I have some of yours? They ran out of water.” I sighed and Bill nodded. I thanked him and drunk some and then went back to sit with Tom.

Tom glared at me and then moved away from me. “What?” I said and he ignored me. I sighed and then put my head on his shoulder but he moved away. “Tom!” I complained and he rolled his eyes. “What? Go sit with someone else your bothering me.” He complained. “Okay then!” I said and then went and sat with Bill. Bill looked at me confused. “Why you not sitting with Tom?” He asked and I sighed. “He’s grumpy right now. Don’t tell me you are too? I know you don’t like waking up early either..” I said and he shook his head. “Nuh uh, I’m not that mad. I just wanna sleep more.” Bill said and we both started to talk and laugh about some other things.

Third persons pov

Y/N excused themselves and went to the bathroom. When Y/N walked out, they saw Tom standing there, waiting to go to the bathroom. “Hi Tomie.” Y/N smiled and Tom ignored them and went to the bathroom. “Rude.” Y/N shouted while he was in the bathroom and rolled their eyes and went back to Bill.

It was the afternoon by then, and you’d remind Tom how he acted while laughing and showing the picture you took of him in the morning. “And you didn’t even want me to sit next to you. Your own partner.” You pretended be sad and Tom laughed. “Well that’s what you get for waking me up!” He shrugged his shoulders and you hit his head playfully. “Oh shut up! No apologies for how you acted? Wow..” You pretended be mad and walk away but he grabbed your arm and kissed you.

“Take that as a apology, liebe?” He smirked and you rolled your eyes and smiled. “I guess I’ll accept it.” You smiled and kissed him. “Get a room you two!” Bill yelled and ran away. You and Tom chuckled and held hands and walked to the car that was waiting for you guys.

sorry that was short pookie😞💔 im actually getting so lazy it’s crazy..but yeah ill find some time to do everything and stuff:) once I’m done with all requests ill open them back up!

taglist (i forgot oopies): @bored0writer @saumspam @ilovebill-and-gustav

#tokio hotel #tom kaulitz #tom kaulitz x reader #gender neutral reader

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vrisrezis · 1 year

Note

Rocket raccoon hcs . Just kinda . Interactions and stuff I guess I’m not sure? I just would like to see how rocket interacts with his partner LOL

OK I TRIED IM NOT GOOD WITH DIALOGUE BUT I LOVE SEEING LIKE .. IN CHARACTER DIALOGUE IN FICS SO !! Also . These r just little interactions between the two in random scenarios lol

- You groan as you look inside your bag, “rocket what the hell?!” “What?! What’d I do?” “You know what you did why the hell is there a prosthetic eye in my bag?!” And then all of a sudden, rocket no longer seems pissed your once again accusing him of something he didn’t do, he starts howling with laughter. “Oh my fucking god is that why those crazy assholes were shooting at us?!” “Yes- ah-HAHAHA” he laughs even louder, doubling over and holding his stomach. “It was funny, right?!” “God I’m going to actually kill you.”

- “you cannot seriously be on Gamora side! Cmon!” “Don’t Cmon me rocket. You and quill could’ve gotten us killed because your egos are so fucking huge.” You sigh, “and!! You stole some fucking battery’s we don’t even need!” your ears flop down in a manner that seems more sad, rather than angry. “Why don’t you ever think of anyone but yourself?”

- “what is that?” “A bomb.” “Oh. Okay.” you shrug, walking off as quill raises a brow at you. “What?” “You’re just gonna say ‘oh okay’ to a freakin bomb!” “Not a big deal quill” rocket says, tinkering with something else entirely. “It is!!!”

- “merryyyy christmasss my beloveddd!” You sang in a singsong voice, that maybe was a little too cheerful for your boyfriends liking. He rolls his eyes, “thanks hun,” he says with a smile, and although it sounds sarcastic you know it’s genuine. “But never do that shit again.” he says with now with a frown on his features.

- “so your dating this little rabbit?” the Norse god questions you, and you shrug. “I guess so” “you guess so?! The hell!” “Well, you still haven’t kissed me yet!” Rocket looks at you completely exasperated.

- “why don’t we ask the captain… oh wait! It’s me!” “Psh! Hahahaha!” “Babe Cmon don’t laugh! Do not laugh!”

- “wow. I’ve known you for like.. 10 years and you still can’t dance.” You said with a cocky grin, something the male was not used to seeing on your face. “Oh Cmon, give me a break.” “No way dude, I gave you 10 whole years to get your shit together.”

- “it’s not like I like you!” “Uh huh, sure rocket!” “I do not! I did not save you because I like you, I saved you because your useful and quill would be mad at me. I don’t feel like dealing with his shit today!” “Keep telling yourself that.”

- rocket was just starting up the ship. Ready to take off. He told you, if you ever needed him, he’s one call away. But for emergencies only. He won’t be gone long. Two days, tops. Super important mission he needed to go on. You call him, and he looks down wondering what the hell you could possibly need before he’s even taken off yet. “Hey.. something wrong?” “Yes.” You say as a matter a factly. “I miss you.” “Oh for the love of-”

- rocket laughs right in your face. “Holy shit! You’re jealous” your eyes widen and you puff your cheeks in embarrassment. “That’s so funny! Hahaha!” “Ugh!! I’m not jealous why the hell would I be jealous of some broad anyway!” “Doesn’t explain why you started growling! Hahaha!” “I’ll kill you!”

- “I love you” you say with a happy sigh as you give him a quick peck on the lips. He smirks, “I know.”

- “I love you!!!!” rocket screams in your face, and you’ve honestly never had him scream in your face before. “Rocket- I know but wh- mmf!” He cute you off with a kiss to the face. He was very emotional that day. For whatever reason…

- “what is this?!” “A hug, moron. Don’t tell anyone or I’ll seriously kill you.” Rocket threatens, “Got it… but uh… can you do it again?”

- “you’re so goddamn lucky I don’t bite your hand off.” Rocket says as you pet behind his ears, you smile at him dreamily, “yeah, I know.”

- “don’t you dare go in there! You’ll die idiot!” Rocket yells at you, and in all the time you’ve known him you’ve never seen him so emotional. Even when you both thought you lost groot in the battle with Ronan. “I have to! Quill is out there!” you say, “and you better not shoot at me too!” you say, referring to the fact he just shot gamora to keep her from chasing after Peter. He grabs your wrist, and you see tears in his eyes. “Please.. you can’t… I can’t… you’re the one person… I can’t lose..”

- You are everything to rocket. He’d never tell you that, but you’ll certainly tell him. It leads to you wondering if you care more about him than he cares about you. As you confess these feelings to Rocket, he sighs deeply, grabbing your hand. “I… you’re… you’re the whole galaxy to me.. I’m sorry I never knew how to tell you that.”

- you dragged Rocket around, which to him felt like forever. It wasn’t a bad way to spend the day, but he made it seem like an eternity was passing by. “Why are you dragging me around with you anyway.” “Because I like dragging you around. Cause I like you.” He groans. “You’re such a freakin sap.” “You love it.” You smile at him giddily. And for once, he smiles back. “Yeah. I do.”

- you felt a rope wrap around your ankles and pull you to the ground. You land straight on your face. Instead of being nice to you for once and being a good boyfriend, Rocket simply laughs in your face. “Rocket if you keep laughing at me I will cut your nails!” making rocket shut up pretty quickly. Works like magic.

- “wake up!” You say, slapping your boy right in the face. “Ow! What the hell was that for!” “Saw it in a show Peter watches! Thought it would help!”

- you push Rocket into quills ship, as he tries to converse with a man from the nova corps as to why he should be allowed to literally steal. “Get in you big moron.” “Who you calling the big moron?! Drax is right there for you to insult!”

- “don’t worry babe, I’ll get us out of here” Rocket says with a smirk and a wink, before literally getting tossed away by drax straight into the enemy. By the time he comes back, surprisingly in one piece, you look down at your boyfriend who’s crawling on the ground back towards you. “I’m sure.”

- “I’m working on my anger, really I am. But can you please for the love of Christ stop letting drax in our room.” Rocket says, clearly exhausted. “I didn’t.” “Well I know I didn’t! Why are you lying?!”

- “I could never be mad at you groot.” You smile, giving the baby a light hug so as to not hurt him. “I am groot?” “Rocket is a different story baby.” “Oh Cmon!”

- “y/n I love you but there’s literal plants growing from your shelves because you haven’t cleaned them.” “No there isn’t.” “Oh am I supposed to believe groot is growing mushrooms now?”

- “aww! Rocket you softie!” you grin, scratching his head affectionately as he tries to get you off of him. “No I’m not!! Get off!”

- Rocket gives you a noogie, as you beg him to knock it off with a smile and a giggle on your face. “Not until you admit you like me!”

- you hold your hand out to rocket, giving him the widest grin he’s ever seen on your face. No matter how much he doesn’t want to, he allows it, because he’d give anything to see you smile like that forever. He grabs onto your hand, “just so you know, I can’t dance for shit.” you giggle, “I know.”

- you hear Rocket purr, and man he purrs loud. Your almost positive if anyone walked into this room, they’d hear it even from the door. You purred yourself, but it’s rather quiet especially when in comparison to your boyfriend. “What’s with that dumb grin on your face?” Rocket mumbles, sleepily, taking in your features. “Your purring.” “Tch no I’m not, that’s you.” “You cannot lie straight to my face about this one, it’s not working.”

- “why did you come back? We both know I don’t matter. Not really..” you say, looking down. And it’s the first time ever, rockets ever hurt you physically. He slaps you right in the face, and you widen your eyes, holding onto your cheek. “Ow! What was that for?!” “That was for being a fucking idiot. I was knocking some sense into you!” “Well you didn’t have to slap me!” “Listen to me!” he grabs onto your shoulders, an emotion in his eyes is one you don’t recognize, but it feels raw and powerful. “You matter to me. You are the most important person in my life. I would come back for you, again and again, every single time, if it meant keeping you safe.”

- “I hate you.” “That means I love you, in our own secret language.” “No it doesn’t.” Rocket denies, “Yes it does!!”

- he chases you around on all fours, as do you, around knowhere. He finally catches up to your speed. “Where the hell are you taking me?” “You’ll seee!” You say in a singsong voice, running off, with him trailing behind. “God I hate when you do that.”

- “we should have a cool secret handshake!” “What? No!” “Why not? We’re dating right?” “What the hell does us dating have to do with a secret handshake!”

- it’s been years since he last saw you. Finally, thanos was gone and his family was back, you were back. You finally saw him, and with a soft smile you waved to the person you fell in love with all those years ago. Watching you, he felt himself falling in love all over again. He ran towards you with insane speed, tackling you to the ground in a big hug. “Miss me?” You laughed, hugging back. “Shut up.”

- “are you… perhaps… jeaaaaloussss?” you say in that singsong tone you use so often around him that he seems to hate so much. At this point you can’t even tell if he’s genuinely annoyed or if he’s playing it up. His ear twitches in annoyance. “I am not jealous I was protecting you from him! That guy was totally gonna eat you for dinner!” “Yeah! Okay!” You laugh.

- you vividly remember something about drax saying he literally ate you and rockets species for .. dinner. “Not helping!” Rocket yells back, but you look up at the muscular male with concern. “You ate my kind too?” “Do not listen to him y/n!” Rocket yells back.

- “Cmon sweetie, did you ever have any doubt I had a plan?” “Psh. Yeah I did.” “Oh Cmon let me have this! I totally impressed you with my awesome plan!” “Yeah yeah…” you smile, crossing your arms. “I guess you did” giving him a kiss on the cheek. “Hell yeah I did.” He smirks.

- “hate to cut you short on your little ramble about how much you love me hun but can we kill these guys first?” “Ugh! You always shut me out!” “I swear I’m not doing that this time babe there is a literal space monster after us!”

- “Psh! I’m not dumb..! Am I dumb?” You turned to your boyfriend, who would normally agree that you’re a fucking moron but for once, for your sake, he’s nice. He pats you on the shoulder, “Cmon they’re just jealous baby.” “Awwwwww” you smile giving him a hug. “Nevermind I take it back! You’re a fucking bigger moron than drax!” “Cant take back what you said!” “Yes I can!”

#marvel x y/n #marvel x you #marvel x reader #mcu x you #mcu x reader #mcu x y/n #rocket raccoon x reader #rocket racoon x reader #rocket x reader

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oceanwithouthermoon · 7 months

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i dont know how to articulate this correctly but... sometimes i think about how saiki is so mentally disconnected and isolated from other people, and his powers make it feel impossible to understand them, esp because he hasnt had any faith in humanity since he was a kid (hes also so autistic but shh he probably doesnt know yet)

and so he truly doesnt understand the nuances and complexity of love+friendship+relationships etc... so imagine how confused he could get during times where his relationships get deeper/more complicated

examples ?? (warning for very brief sa+abuse+suicidal thoughts mention in the second one) -

accidentally making one of his friends mad and hearing their thoughts, which are purely from frustration and anger in the moment, about hating and not wanting to be around him.. makes him think they genuinely dont want to be as friend at all anymore, so ONE argument makes him think hes ruined his friendship with them forever and he doesnt think to just apologize, immediately shutting down and just "going away" instead because he thinks thats actually what they want

not understanding why people feel sympathy for him when he talks about tragic things in/about his life, especially when he even dulls it down as to not reveal his powers, (ie: his brother literally trying to murder, humiliate, and borderline sa him OR having one or multiple bullying incidents in elementary school that caused him to lose all his friends and change schools OR saying that the only reason he decidedly hasnt offed himself yet is cuz itd make his mom sad) and mentioning those things a little too casually, then thinking people are trying to pity him and telling the people who are just trying to help to shut the fuck up ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ

^a specific but not quite as angsty one, offhandedly mentioning once that he had a big crush on a guy from another class but he helped set them up with someone else even though it upset him, because he just wanted to see him happy and he never had a chance anyway (bro was def straight too) and his friends being like ...hey thats really sad im sorry you felt like that :(( and him being like ?? whats sad about that. hes happy, and its not like im completely devastated or anything. shut the fuck up.

teruhashi getting over her crush on him and no longer seeking him out as often, and he's immediately upset and confused because now he thinks that she ONLY cared about him when she thought she was going to get something more than friendship from it so he doesnt believe she ever saw him as a true friend..

(similar to the first one, slightly different situation) getting into an argument with one of the friends he sees every single day and still expecting them to at least BE there the next day, and when they arent because theyre avoiding him, his first thought isnt "i should seek them out and apologize" its "wow it was so easy for them to just let go of me, i clearly have formed a dependency and feel like i need them more than they need me. especially now that i know they dont feel the same, i should sever that attachment."

SO YEAH anyway, he genuinely does not believe that he has anyone he can trust enough to actually talk through this stuff with+doesn't even think its that bad so he just sits and tries to feel numb at the bottom of the ocean or on the moon haha what a guy...

#these r all pretty good fic ideas i think.. hm..#saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k.#saiki kusuo #meows post

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binkszamsstuff · 1 year

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Red

Very dark Steve! Mob Steve! Non con! Reader and Steve have a child. Angst!! Lots of grammar and spelling mistakes I’ll edit in the morning or never who knows🤷🏻‍♀️❤️

Red. the pain, the hurt, the passion, the love, everything was red. He was toxic, he was the obsessive. And you were his feen, his drug, his obsession , his love. But the days blurred, the lines no longer were standing, they had fallen. The fights, the late nights, the guessing and questions that went unanswered by him. It was a house on fire, it was red.

There was no time in the day to plan, with his anger, and yours. It was spontaneous, the fight had started because of steves affairs. The lying, the cheating, he ruined you, tore down all walls, made you just as obsessed with him as he was with you. Just to leave you in the dust, to cheat. To add gasoline to the fire that was you, or what was left of you anyhow.

Peggy was a glossy, classy woman with the perfect bubble of power and wittiness. She was everything you weren’t. You were messy, hazed with trouble, a woman gone mad by a man who drove her there. You were his frankenstein, you were old pieces of yourself glued back together again. The young, innocent, naive, funny, charming, and free girl was now chained to the scars he left.

You ran out of the house in the early morning, he came home late yet again. You had stayed up waiting for him, going to confront him in his act. Thats exactly what you did, but the end was not what you pictured. You hopped that he would hold you, say you were wrong, make love to you like in the beginning.

“Are you cheating on me?’ you asked quietly, you sat on the bed. You couldnt took at him.

“I dont want to have this conversation with you, it’ll only hurt you” steve spoke. That was all the answers you needed. You started to yell, scream, through insult after insult.

“I knew it! You’re scerwing peggy! Huh you’re fucking your secretary!” you yelled in his face crying. He rolled his eyes at you and shoved you to the side going to the bathroom to get ready for bed.

“Im tried of this steve” you sobbed walking to the closet grabbing any bag in sight packing up everything.

Once steve heard you say that so defeated he knew that you were serious about leaving him. You and him had lots a fights because of his actions but everytime he kissed it better. He drew back in promising his love and that it will never happen again. But it always does. Steve now had his suite jacket off, his selves rolled up, strands of his hair in hs face,

“You’re not leaving me” he stated

“Watch me” you said back in anger, masking the sadness.

“y/n i own you, you’re mine! You cant leave me baby” he said getting angry.

“You cheated steve! Again. I-i cant do this i cant sit here and wait for you to love me again. We are not the people we were when we first started dating. I cant and wont be the drunk housewife waiting for her husband whose never gonna come back because his mistress.” you were out of breath from crying and talking so fast while packing.

Steve stepped closer “baby come on its me! Its us! We always get through stuff like this!” he tried to manipulate you with his soft words but this time it wouldn’t work. the naive girl you used died, not even a ghost left of her

“We wouldnt have to “get through this stuff” if you didnt cheat and fuck other women.” you held up air qoutes while talking.

“I love you” steve pulled you in near, kissing the top of your head. You sobbed in his chest, hurt, angry, betrayed. The three year relationship was now smoke, the fire was all burnt out. The engagement ring heavy on your finger, it was a line of whispered lies and i love yous.

Steve drew you to the bed, kissing his way up your neck. His hands sliding down your frame gripping your hips. His false hope whispered in your ear and apologies that didnt have any meaning stuck to you, like a cigarette burn. He took off your clothes and gently laid you on the bed. ‘When was the last time he was gentle with me?’ you thought to yourself as he kissed and licked at you lower lips.

“Say something baby, tell me you wont leave me, that you love me” he begged like he was the victim. You stayed silent, numb.

“prettybaby i love you. Say it back! I need you! I cant live with out you!” both of you now naked on the bed. he pushed himself into your entrance, all you could do was cry.

Steve begged and whined for you back but little did he know the car was running outside waiting to escape him and this burning house.

Steve fell asleep hugging you, his head resting on your tummy his arm wrapped around you. You ran your fingers through his hair, soaking up what was left of the man you used to know, he was burned alive, gone. You slowly pushed him off of you and got dressed, grabbing the bags on clothes and bathroom care you walked out. You looked around the house as you left, the nicknacs and photos of you and steve. The nursery that sat empty. Steve promised children but then came peggy. You kissed your engagement ring and then placed it on the entry table by steves keys.

Getting in the car and speeding off in to what was left of the mess steve made of you.

One year later-

A wail of a new born was calling out to you in the dead of the night. You never got frustrated being a single mother, reminding yourself when you caught yourself being negative that you could still be with steve. Penny was three months old and her blonde curly hair was sticking in every which way. It made you giggle.

“Hi! Mommys here its okay penny girl” you picked her up rocked her in your arms.

She might be steve daughter but you never let her know what pain she was created from, you would never let her end up like steve nor you.

“Mama loves you” you said as she closed her big eyes again just needing comfort from her mom to make her feel better. Steve didnt know that the night that the two of you had sex before you left was the cause of a beautiful little girl. He had tried to call, and text you put after smaing you phone and leaving to state of New York for Washington you knew he wouldnt find you.

You lived in a little white house with a garden in a small town tucked away from the crazy and hurt.

You sat in the rocking chair in pennys room rocking her, your tiredness was catching up to you. Just as your eyes started to close he spoke from the depths of the darkness that was the closet.

“Oh prettybaby you are such a good little mommy, just like i knew you would be” he walked closer.

You screamed. Getting up with penny in your arms backing away from him trying stumble to the door backwards,

“Get out. Steve get out! I-i cant-” you sobbed your hold on penny grew tighter.

“Baby its okay, i wont hurt you. y/n im so proud of you, look at the life you built for our little girl, now i am mad you didnt tell me you were pregnant. But baby she is gorgeous. Now i need you to decide either you come home or we can live out here. Ya know i kinda love it here. Good thinking babe this is great place to rise kids”

You sobbed harder.

“How did you find us” you asked crying, so scared.

“Oh baby dont be naive, i will always find you”

“You cant be in our life, your toxic and i wont rase my daughter in the life we used to have. She wont end up like us! You cant be here! You ruined me!’ you sobbed and hyperventilated. He slowly walked closer like approaching an injured animal

“Baby i know i know, i was wrong and mean and cruel to you. I was blind i thought you would always be there for me. I took you for granted. Shes gone y/n, i got rid of peggy, shes taking a long nap and i aint ever gonna hurt you like that again. I need you baby…..and i need to be in my daughters life. I cant live without you nor am i gonna be able to leave her all alone now too” he explained

“I wanna have a good life, nothing like the one we used to have. You scare me steve and you’ve hurt me” you said looking at little penny who had a frown on hef face, she could read the distress from her mother.

“y/n look at me!” steve grabbed your face in his hands and made you look at him. “I will make it up to you i promise. I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you baby. I cant live without you” you shock your head no

“Its okay i get it y/n we need time, but im not going anywhere” steve spoke again.

“Come on lets put penny girl back in ger crib and go to bed” steve guided you to the crib and put penny down. She was right back to being cozy and sleepy. Steve pulled you in a hug while you sobbed into his chest, he was sliding his hand over your hair while shushing you.

“Come one lets go to sleep.” steve took your hand in his and leaded you back to your room. You laid down still crying, steve undressed himself down to his boxers and then joined you. He spooned you.

“I’ve missed you so much baby” was the last thing you heard before falling into slumber because you had cried yourself to sleep in his arms.

The house was burnt but in its ashes something new rose.

Authors note; i know some people will not understand why she didnt fight more, and the reason why was because she was in shock. It been and year and he shows up and shes like oh crap he found me and our now daughter. She is really scared of him and numb. Also steve is a mob boss by the way.

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girlfriendsofthegalaxy · 5 months

Text

tuesdaypost year in review

this year brought to you by viewers like you. thank you! i still do not know how to thank everyone for their incredible generosity during the Late July/Early August Moving Catastrophe Badtimes and im still feelin some kinda way about it. thank you.

took eight weeks completely off, more than any other year so far

overnight traveled for work for the first time

moved cross country with Mack to face dangers untold and hardships unnumbered

bought an actual for-real couch and not a futon

got Phil

(unrelated to Phil) i got spayed after almost ten years of begging and pleading various medical professionals, (also unrelated) got covid and RSV back to back

listening

fallow weeks: 8. i almost always have a tuesdaysong bc i am almost always listening to something. all of the tuesdaysongs are here:

particular favorites were Peel Me A Grape (Anita O’Day), top spotify song of the year Yeah Yeah Yeah (Blood Orchid), Yeah Yeah Yeah’s Wolf remixed by Sextile, Father Finlee (Spence Hood), A Minha Menina (Os Mutantes).

the very last tuesdaysong of the year is Sugar Rum Cherry by Duke Ellington, one of the few christmas songs i tolerate.

special shoutout to the austin underscore walker universe of podcasts, bc i mainlined A More Civilized Age (clone wars/star wars rewatch) while packing, and devoured P/alisade (the newest scifi season of F/riends at the Table) this month.

reading

fallow weeks: 11. pleased that i am killing the invisible rules in my head and including more articles instead of feeling guilty about Not Reading A Real Book!!! every week when i sit down to write the tuesdaypost. read a fuckton earlier this year bc i was procrastinating moving prep, have not read much since i moved.

article sources:

inoreader (the best free RSS feed/app imo)

The Markup (gold standard usage of data to show how various technologies are being used to harm the public good: you may have heard of the recent American bills to equalize internet service and fix organ donation grift. that was them)

Web 3 Is Going Just Great (crypto disasters)

404 Media (technology reporting, internet culture, also break a lot of data/legal/privacy scandals)

Remap (formerly Vice's video games division Waypoint, more active on podcasts and twitch but do have great personal essays about gaming longreads)

Retraction Watch (an important academic service but platformed a particularly virulent transphobe and let the comments devolve into a free for all. yes im still mad about this)

Krebs on Security (~once a month extremely long and thoughtful infosec writeups)

Data Colada (cover academic data whoopsies, currently being sued for their journalism)

the two authors i spent the most time with this year were Alexis Hall (romance novels and novellas) and Raymond Chandler's noir detective novels. i read 90% of Raymond Chandler's work in march and went insane about yet another sad bisexual man. Philip Marlowe the cat is named after his pet detective, the human Philip Marlowe.

march was kind of a banger for this category bc in one of what i consider the best tuesdayposts this year, i tried to break down why i fucking hated Frank Miller's Sin City comics so much.

other comics, but ones i loved: Spy X Family, Berserk, weird noir DC miniseries The Human Target.

watching

fallow weeks: 10

notable stuff i watched for the first time (according to letterboxd) that will stick in my head for a bit. some (The Night of the Hunter) i am so glad i watched once but do not feel the need to revist. some (Slipstream) fascinate me with how good they could have been. some (Twilight. all of them) were fun bc of the people i watched them with. the two i went particularly deranged over are The Big Sleep and Day of Anger. still feel very normal about them.

very heavy on crime and courtroom films this year!

television: very excited for s2 of Blue Eye Samurai, Interview With The Vampire, Spy X Family.

youtube

i should loop back and finish Black Lagoon, Adventure Time (completely forgot i rewatched most of that this spring), and The Big O. that last one is throwing me a little bc (since i last checked) there is no freely available version with subtitles (i cannot find subtitles Period) and i'll be damned if i have to import a dvd. i can find the dub with subtitles but! i want to hear spike spiegel as mecha-batman :(

sort of lukewarm eh-i'll-get-around-to-it about s/tar wars shows. i have not watched a/hsoka At All or wrapped up the animated Resistance show. i'll pay attention when ando/r is airing again.

playing

fallow weeks: 10. way fewer than i would have guessed!

the trouble with this category is that it is exceptionally hard to find new good games (either ones i already own or ones that are free). it is almost completely prohibitively exhausting to trawl through the free category on steam. there's simply a lot of cruft out there. a very good thing (but also incredibly timeconsuming thing) i started this year was throwing games into various folders so the eight bajillion libraries i have are less overwhelming. i can safely ignore 80% of my epic games library, for example. the itch.io library is a whole separate weekend project i think.

got back into genshin for good or for ill, which took up most of the back half of the year.

youtube

go play ABZU. i am no longer asking.

i would like to go back and finish the RPG Gamedec, un-softblock myself in the RPG Weird West, and finish the visual novel Dead Man's Rest. i think i stalled out in Call of Juarez: Gunslinger bc there was a mexican standoff that my reflexes are simply not fast enough for/too much to pay attention to. i am excited to pick up that spooky fishing simulator DREDGE when i have fun money again.

completely forgot i spent most of jan/feb/march being annoyed at fallou/t 4 but having some fun in Far Harbor, also forgot i spent an entire month playing through Wolfenstein: The New Order but i am not compelled to play through it again. it was fun! but like many games after one playthrough my time with it is done!

making

fallow weeks: 17 (unsurprising, pretty low energy year as a whole as i recovered from covid rounds 1 and 2 and the frankly insane stress of moving).

wrote exactly one fic: some matters at the heart of cowboy western snap shirts: why they are so and some of the implications of their being so, i would like to write more next year but i don't really have the brainpower. i hope this changes soon.

the baby blanket i started last year is still not done but the baby is still under a year so i have a very narrow window of time.

dyed some couch covers im still very pleased with

wrote an extremely long but very well received gallery wall guide

recipes: 12. sort of shocked by this? i am becoming an incrementally better cook and slowly finding recipes i both like and can successfully execute. found the fortitude to caramelize onions, for example. quick pickled red onions, for another thing. big year for protein or greens on top of beans and rice. faves included: cuban-style pork shoulder, hellofresh peruvian chicken, red lentil soup, white bean/kale/rice bowls

i would like to be less terrified about cooking fish. i would like to eat more fish.

and of course, the biggest project of all, acquired Phil. here is my very favorite photo ive ever taken of a cat

#tuesday again #tuesday again no problem

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powderseas · 3 months

Note

side order is here!!! its real!!! yippee

what do you think of it so far?

ok so im just gonna spit out all my side order thoughts so far

SPOILERS FOR SIDE ORDER AHEAD!!!!!!

EDIT: I ACTUALLY FINISHED THE GAME WOOO (just one run tho lol) im gonna write my thoughts under the previous stuff

OK SO. i think im a little..? dissapointed..? abt sider order?? like im kinda conflicted abt the lore, also i suck BALLS at the game

the thing is i have done 5 runs so far AND COULDNT GET A SINGLE WIN. the most i can do is up to floor 20.... im literally so bad at this game I ONCE DIED 2 TIMES IN AN EASY LEVEL. im newgen guys.

maybe im not fit for rougelike games but like... idk. i feel like me and the fandom as a whole expected so much more from side order. i feel like if the game is gonna make you replay the same stuff over and over again it should atleast have a SOUL CRUSHING LITERARY MASTERPIECE TYPE OF LORE like OE and Alterna

AND CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW DIRTY THEY DID FOUR???? literally called them an irrelavent loser and then sweeped them aside... THEY DONT EVEN HAVE A PALETTE ICON???? theyre not even a secret boss smh.... agent 4 had so much potential I WILL NEVER FORGIVE NINTENDO FOR THIS. and like sure the parallel canon level kind of includes four but that thing is literally an npc??? like imagine what they couldve done with the story if they had included four in it:

when four is left out from the squidbeak splatoon they try to prove themselves by siding with marina with her project. it makes perfect sense. marina and four are both scared of being seperated by their loved ones. but four gets consumed by their anger and jealousy and goes full order mode LIKE DO YOU GUYS SEE MY VISION!!!! i will be forever mad that we didnt get this.

also why is murch out of all the chracters have a pallete??? why didnt they put in captain 3 or something????? sheldon i kinda understand since hes also kinda a part of the squidbeak splatoon BUT MURCH??? get the fuck out!!!

negative stuff aside tho. i love pearl and marina so much. THIS IS THE PEARLINA GAME GUYS!!!!! pearl literally mentions that marina and her sleep in the SAME BED???? marina is so autistic. my little autism creature. SHE MAKES DINO ARMS IN THE ENDING SCENE AUGHHHHHGHHH MY HEARTTT i love marina so much AND PEARL. SUCH A SILLY GOOBER. acht is so precious too... BUT I CNAT BELIEVE THAT THEY MADE THEM WHITE*??? ACHT IS NOT WHITE NINTENDO. anyways i love eight and her little found family full of lesbians. they are all lesbians your honor. we are raising lesbians in this house.

so yeah. i hope i can finish the run atleast ONCE. but like. idk i havent finished the game but side order jsut makes me feel. sad... and lonely...?? unlike octo expension where you could see more and more people using the metros and the chatrooms between marina and pearl are just AUUGGHHH OE IS A GAME. ABOUT CONNECTIONS OK. it makes me feel warm and happy and even though eight became traumatized i like to think that she healed and in the process met so many important people in her life.

in side order i dont see anything in eight*??? is she traumatized??? is she vibing??? is she happy to help??? I LITERALLY CANT TELL. side order makes me feel so cold and empty like do you guys understand what i mean. and its probably becasue it doesnt even take place in the real world. and the thing is. i understand that side order is supposed to be everything that OE couldnt be. i understand that. both games have their own quirks BUT. i just cant seem to make myself love it unlike any other story mode in splatoon...... im really trying to be not biased here but yeah. these are my opinions for side order

AFTER GAME THOUGHTS

HELLO. so yes i somehow managed to win the game. and honestly. the final boss was pretty fun and everyone was so cute at the end omg... but i still think that side order is a bit underdevloped.... i dont even know if ill try to %100 is cuz playing it makes me SO STRESSFUL im glad i get to finish a run BUT i will definetly not be touching side order atleast for a while.... but despite i had plenty of stuff i didnt like in side order the ending managed to make me forget all that haha

#ask #splatoon #splatoon 3 #splatoon side order #side order #splatoon 3 side order #side order dlc #side order spoilers

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