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hpfannons · 3 years

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Oh la la! Thats a fine choice of specimen. Thank you. :) lol. I only ask about the jealousy thing because I remember that Dick said one time that they only get to see him 2 months a year or something... I probably meant the batfam side i guess... lol but its good most Harry’s friend are okay or just roll with it... maybe I should asked some batfam moments during their stay in order hq... I really love that scene where Harry was on Dick’s lap and and the rest are just with them... I kinda want a scene with the same feeling...if you dont mind. xD thank you very much! glad to hear ur answer about fudge and umbridge. thank you so much... im really immersed in this au... looking forward to part 7. >_< thanks and stay safe y’all.

Glad you like my batfam! My best friend and I spent way too long going back and forth on people we could agree on for different characters (I think Tim and Alfred were the hardest… but it was years ago, so don’t quote me on that lol)

Sorry about the jealousy thing though, miscommunication on my part. I blame that for answering at 3 am on my phone XD

Yes, there is a lot of buried jealousy with the Batfam. Though surprisingly, most of it comes from Harry. That’s mostly because all these new family members come in while he’s at school, so it kind of feels like they’re all much more close knit with each other than with him because he’s not there for the large portion of the year.

They’re all happy to include him and catch him up with things he missed while he was at school… But there are some things you just have to be there in the moment for, because retelling the story just isn��t quite the same.

That’s not to say that the rest of the Batfam don’t have the same feelings as well, I think I’ve mentioned before that Tim and Harry especially are very close (actually best friends, on the same level as Harry and Ron) so Tim is definitely one of those people who feels Harry’s lost during the year the most.

Add on the fact it’s not really that easy to keep in touch with him while he’s at school, and it really is just hard on everyone.

As a side note, I fully believe the family would find some kind of way to make alterations to a communicator that will work at Hogwarts. Considering how many people who both use magic and have been involved with the Justice League in some way or the other, I find it hard to believe they haven’t found a work around for the whole magic screws with tech problem. At the very least, Harry would have a way to check his email from family, b/c making Headwig carry letters from Scotland to New Jersey and back is just cruel.

As far as the Batfam hanging out around 12 Grimmauld Place… They’re trying to be as non-confrontational as possible, even if there’s still some ruffled feathers from the first night. So the boys mostly go along with helping clean out the place under Molly’s orders - Jason was originally kind of prickly about it because he’s not a child (certainly not her child), so he found getting ordered around kind of insulting… Until his inner clean freak won out and yeah, this place does need a lot of work. Alfred has taught them all well, and it shows.

Tim mostly hauls himself up in the library when he can get away from clearing out pixies and de-gnoming the garden. He’s got like four notebooks full of information and Ron is a little shocked to find out Harry wasn’t kidding when he said Tim was worse than Percy and Hermione together when it came to information gathering.

Damian has less than stellar people skills at the best of times, and here he’s decided he doesn’t care very much for anybody over the age of seventeen (that’s not family anyway), so most of Dick’s time has been dedicated to keeping the youngest away from most of the Order. Not that he really blames him, Dick isn’t nearly as vocal about it as Damian, but he is also just completely done with all of them. He’s only playing nice because they’re here for Harry.

Bruce has also posted himself up in the library, reading everything he can get ahold of in regards to the history of the wizarding world trying to understand exactly what he’s son has gotten wrapped up in. Because lord knows nobody in this house is going to explain it to him… At this point he’s about one wrong comment away from telling them exactly where they can shove their ‘muggle’ excuses.

There was one notable evening though, when the boys as well as the Weasleys and Hermione were just hanging out in a parlor or sitting room or whatever it was supposed to be. Jason had been messing around with an old radio he found the other day and between him and Tim, they managed to get it working. The minute they recognized Britney Spears’s voice, there were four sets of eyes immediately on Dick who gave all of twenty seconds of resistance before he was up and dragging people along to dance with him. The impromptu party had ended up going on for hours, Tonks getting roped into the fun with them while Sirius and Remus smiled fondly from the doorway. Molly made a passing comment about bedtime, but didn’t argue back when that was quickly shot down by the other adults. Let the kids be kids while they could.

As far as soft moment’s for the Batfam… there are two that really come to mind, though they’re kind of sad though.

The first is really kind of short, but it’s after the battle of Hogwarts, and Harry’s come back from his final fight with Voldemort, and there’s just people everywhere in the great hall, but Harry knows exactly where he’s going. Bruce is standing to the side, watching while Jason’s getting patched up, and trying to keep an eye on his other kids as well. Everyone's a little banged up and bruised, but they’re all alive, and that’s the important part right now.

And then he sees Harry and there’s this almost tangible sense of relief because now all of his kids are present and accounted for, and Bruce feels like he can finally breathe again. And Harry just like collapses into Bruce who has to scramble a little bit to catch him, but then just stands there and holds him, because Harry is just completely exhausted mentally, physically, and emotionally. And all Bruce hears is “I want to go home Dad.”, and honest to god Batman almost starts crying in the middle of the great hall in front of everyone.

The other is after the Triwizard Tournament, and everything with Mad-Eye Crouch, when Harry’s in the hospital wing. Everyone’s standing around trying to figure out what the hell just happened, and Harry wakes up still kind of groggy from whatever Madam Pomfrey gave him to knock him out, and he ends up breaking down crying in front of everyone.

Dick doesn’t even hesitate, he’s on Harry before the first tear even really starts rolling and just tucks him into the crook of his neck and let’s him cry it out. Except Harry’s been traumatized and he’s like full-on sobbing, almost wailing, and that just stabs everyone straight through the heart. Tim’s next, doesn’t say anything, just sits down behind Harry and tucks himself up against his brother’s back. Damian and Jason join in as well, Damian sitting on Harry’s other side and just quietly putting his head on Harry’s shoulder; while Jason sit’s down a little farther away, reaching out to put a hand on the back of Harry’s neck. Bruce is standing on the other side of the bed, and just runs a hand through Harry’s hair while they let him get it out and calm down.

And once he’s down to hiccups and kind of stuttery breaths, Dumbledore says something about leaving him be, and if looks could kill… Jason’s still armed, and he almost, almost goes for the gun. Bruce head’s it off at the pass though, saying he’ll go with them to discuss things further and also inform the league about what’s happened, but the rest of the boys will be staying.

Madam Pomfry insists on dosing Harry again, and after some reassurances that his brother’s aren't going anywhere, they get him to drink the potion. That’s as far as they indulge the mediwitch though. Tim and Damian both try to settle down in the bed on either side of their brother, though after some jostling around and being unable to really fit two teenagers and a ten year old comfortably in a hospital cot; Dick and Jason move another bed over flush against Harry’s and Dick manages to coax Damian into it with him, as long as the younger is able to keep hold of Harry’s arm. Jason retakes the seat he’d pulled up to the bedside, kick’s his feet up on the cot and settles in to keep watch over the lot of them for the night. And that is exactly where and how Bruce finds them the next morning.

#harry potter and the batfam #batfam anon #harry potter #batman #batfam #Anonymous

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dr-who-said-lgbtq-rights · 3 years

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i, a fan of superwholock, dissect and give my opinion on the individual shows

idk i thought this would be fun and i currently have 4-5 hours to kill soooo

let’s start with

doctor who

(only new who. i have not seen the older stuff :( )

k. so. i have been a fan of this since i was pretty young. honestly i think i was a little too young to be watching it when my mom first showed me it but that’s beside the point. basically: i really like dr who

this is probably the best show out of superwholock, both in my opinion and in general. however... i am going to be nitpicky bc why not

1. the canon.

(yes the example is abt a dr who episode)

in short, the canon is comprised of a) retcons and b) contradictions. im not an avid follower of canon with any media but good god nobody can keep up with dr who canon

(i am blaming moffat bc i hate him and i think a lot of it is his fault anyway)

2. representation

honestly, the representation isn’t bad. however, i would describe it less as “good” and more as “a good starting point.”

for example, there is quite a bit of queer rep, POC rep, and a lot of characters are women. however, while this is nice, the show could still use a lot more rep, and the rep it has currently should probably be improved upon (for example: jack harkness is NOT straight, but he falls under the “multi-spec person wants to screw everyone” stereotype (i have not seen torchwood so this may be amended in that i just needed an example off the top of my head)).

3. story

some people yearn for romance. i yearn for the days when the doc would take their companion to some party, flirt with a tree, the companion almost dies while britney spears is playing in the background, etc. etc.

basically, the story starts out nice. just a bunch of goofing off, maybe a “big deal” thing here and there. life was fun.

then, the story changes. (this happened specifically from eleven onward, so yeah you can bet your ass im blaming moffat ‘cuz it’s his fault) things gradually became less fun. conspiracies ran amok; just when you thought it was over, turns out there’s an even bigger part of this plan that what you just defeated. the doc actually started caring about the timeline (what happened to time being wibbly wobbly?) sure, there are still fun episodes where the doc and the companion(s) go out for funsies but it’s just not the same as it was.

4. morals

morals are good. basically:

you can have a dark past but still have a bright future, and

be kind

bonus 5. cowardice

at least one of the doctors played by one of the male actors should have worn a dress. there were plenty of opportunities but noooooo there’s a gender binary or something (like,,, they’re an alien????? if gender on gallifrey is the same as gender on earth i am going to fly to britain and drop kick some writers)

OVERALL

needs work, but p good and enjoyable.

~~~

now it’s time for

sherlock

just. um. ohhh boy. basically

but i am going to do my best

1. representation

eugh. representation was baaaad in this. like, i think the only POC in the entire show that had any significance were the Chinese gang members and that is like,,, incredibly poor rep. i think the innkeepers in thob were gay but that’s as far as queer rep goes. there were a few women, i would die for all of them, we need more women. also the “im a high functioning sociopath” line makes me cringe everytime

basically this show had shit representation

2. john

okee he’s a great character right??? the common sense of the operation right??? wrong

he cheated on mary??? and we don’t address it like,,, at all??? it made me so fucking mad.

(again fuck you moffat and gatiss probably had something to do with it too so im mad at him as well)

3. sherlock

classic “let’s make him a bitch” mistake. needs the stick surgically removed from his ass

4. story

story’s actually not that bad. it’s not like, great or anything but i enjoy it

bonus 5. ending

i just want to address it. i think the ending was p good and yall tjlc-ers are just upset that they didn’t bang or anything. they’re literally living in the same [two-room] flat??? and they’re raising rosie???? TOGETHER???? like what more do you want

anyway sherlock’s ace soooo

OVERALL

eh. needs LOTS of work. i love mrs hudson tho, she’s beautiful

~~~

and finally

supernatural

ohohoh. boooyyyy.

(plz forgive me this is so shitty but i threw it together in like,,, a minute)

1. story

aight so the first five seasons? p good. not much to say there

the other ten? the skill level of the writing went wayyyyyy down but i still enjoyed it

2. representation

this show is notorious for bad rep and for good reason. kevin, our beloved prophet and the only recurring asian-american character? dead. charlie, so nerdy and fun and also a lesbian? dead. castiel, the angel who was totally gay? dead. basically: if you find yourself in spn and you are not a straight white man, etc etc, you are going to a) die or b) die but in a worse way

3. mythology/treatment of religions

okay so. a while back i had a wicca/witchcraft hyperfixation which was closely followed by a general pagan religions hyperfixation, so i know some stuff here and there abt religions.

and good golly does this show make me MAD

why is christianity the central and most powerful religion? (i know why, it’s a rhetorical question) why do you demonize the other religions?? (again it’s rhetorical)

one thing that really annoys me is when they say something is a “pagan god.” like,,, do you know how many gods that contains??? if you didn’t know, a religion is considered pagan if it isn’t under the abrahamic religions umbrella. what are the abrahamic religions, you ask? well, they are christianity, judaism, and islam. literally every other religion ever is a pagan religion. so, when they say “it’s a pagan god,” i cry.

back to demonizing... they literally made a greek muse eat someone. my greek mythology phase ended a long time ago and i didn’t really get into the muses but i am p sure they didn’t eat people. also the fact that it makes hoodoo look dark and stuff when it’s actually more abt peace and healing... i bet ten dollars it’s because hoodoo was created by enslaved african americans

there are so many examples of this show disrespecting religions... i just can’t

4. general notes

(for you himym fans: *saluting* general notes) (sorry i couldn’t resist)

-the filler episodes/episodes where random shit happened were the best

-the finale memes are *chef’s kiss*

-god there’s so much abt this show that i can’t even choose bc my brain is overloading

-am i glad amara wasn’t ganked at the end of s11? yes. am i happy about the dean/amara kiss? gods no

-john winchester 🤝 steven moffat: getting a spot on my “fuck you” list

OVERALL

there is just. so much improvement needed. however if there is an absolute shit show with likeable characters i tend to gravitate to it

~~~

and for funsies let’s talk abt superwholock as a whole

-honestly im a sucker for crossover fandoms. if you scroll far enough on my blog you may find my rotbtd fanart.

-it’s honestly just a fun idea

-there’s a lot of ways you could make it happen and all of them are fun

-great opportunities for rarepairs so rare no crackshipper has thought of it

~~~

aight that’s it. thank you for reading! if you have any questions abt my opinions abt other aspects of the shows just ask, i like talking abt this

#dr-who-said... something #as a side note: if you wanna hear abt pagan religions just ask #i may not be fixated on it anymore but i still find them interesting #superwholock

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ellana-ravenwood · 5 years

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Salt, Tequila, Lemon - Jason Todd x Reader

Please read this intro, thank you very much :

So. I posted this yesterday, but after a bug on the Tumblr app on my phone it got deleted. I’m super bummed out because it had over 200 notes and quite a few feedbacks that I never got to read because it was accidentally deleted...If the people that took the time to comment things on the story could take a bit more time to write a little comment again and give me their feedbacks, and also if the people that liked and reblog could do it once more...i’d appreciate the hell out of you <3. So reposting it (thanks god I always have back ups of all my stories now). Written in twenty minutes during my break at work. Bam. Hope you’ll like it :

Also, since Tumblr’s new guidelines and enforcement of it, I DON’T really appear in searches anymore, so the only way for this story to be seen by others than those who follow me is to reblog it. So if you wanna, you can show your support for my writing by doing just that. Thanks very much. You can find my masterlist here : @ella-ravenwood-archives

_________________________________________________

Ok. So. Grandma’s remedy against heartbreak ? Oh, right.

Salt. Tequila. Lemon.

Got it. Licking the back of your hand to make the salt stick to it, you pour yourself a massive shot of “To-Kill-Ya” in your coffee mug, not even caring about the fact that there is still some remnant of your cappuccino from last night in it.

You focus on the sound the liquid makes as it fills your cup. Makes you think about something else. Good. Yup. This was totally gonna help right now.

“Cheers”, you exclaim to yourself, your empty apartment echoing your voice.

Salt.

Wincing. Stingy. Salt on its own is gross.

Tequila.

More wincing. Oh my god, it burns. The coffee that was still at the bottom of the cup is an oddly nice touch.

Lemon.

The last of the Wincing.

You spit the piece of lemon you just bit into in the trash and…miss. The yellow fruit falls with a little flat sound on the floor, and you honestly can’t bother to pick it up. Your apartment is a mess anyway, so you just stare at it angrily and pour yourself another drink.

Salt. Tequila. Lemon.

You gulp the last of the citrus and shiver. Miss the trash again.

Damn. This was good.

Well, actually, it was disgusting.

You didn’t like strong alcohol and what the Hell ?! Why did you leave a bit of coffee in your cup ? Now that the aftertaste was kicking in, it was actually really gross. If the tequila itself didn’t make you wanna throw up, the stale coffee taste nearly did. Oh, and the salt and lemon combination was as awful as ever.

You really didn’t like salt, tequila, or lemon.

But it was still good.

Because thanks to all this immediate awfulness, you could slowly feel yourself drift into “haze land”, and forget about your worries.

Forget that your boyfriend of two years just cheated on you with some random woman you worked with. Woman that, by the way, he met at the Christmas “end of the year” party from you work you invited him to…You gave him free champagne and mise-en-bouche and all your love, and he broke your heart.

It wasn’t your thing, to drink your sorrow away. And it wasn’t your thing either to wallow because of a man…But you genuinely thought he was “the one” (oh what a mistake you would soon realize that was).

He was always so nice, treating you like a princess. He complimented you daily, and never forgot an important date. He was affectionate, not to an annoying point. He was the perfectamount of affectionate. He was a gentleman and seemed to love you and yet, he betrayed you.

If a man like him, that was nothing short but sweet and passionate with you, cheated on you, then did that mean you couldn’t trust anyone ?

Because in your eyes right now, he was perfect. Albeit said eyes were slightly clouded by a a few tequila shots.

You were downing a fourth drink starting to slowly sob when…

There’s very few things that can get you out of a drunk state in seconds.

An extremely cold shower could do the trick, for instance. Brings you back to your senses a bit you know ? You wouldn’t magically be sober, but you’d get a clearer mind. Or someone giving you shocking news ! Or like, an event so incredible that your body just forgets how drunk it is for a minute.

And this event, for you, came at the perfect time.

Right when you were entering your “sad drunk” phase, which was between the “lol alcohol does NOTHING to me” phase where you downed most of your drinks, and the “dancing on the bar’s counter” phase (a few more drinks and you would have a one woman dance party in your living room, acting as if you were on a bar’s counter and that your name was suddenly “Britney”).

Right when you were about to wallow times a thousand, and cry, and yell “whyyyyyyy ?!” to the sky, arms in the air (drama queen).

Years later, looking back on that particular event, you’ll start to realize that Destiny HAS to exist. Because come on, it was just too perfect a timing to be a simple coincidence.

You were about to swallow up your fifth drink, launching yourself head first into the “sad phase” when an ear shattering noise rang all around your apartment.

Broken glass.

It was the sound of broken glass. Heightened to the max by your drunkness. You turned on your stool, and…there he was.

It was a guy. That you were sure of because he had no boobs and too much pecs. And that guy…well that guy just flew right through your window, destroying it. How rude.

There was glass everywhere.

How much did a window cost ? Probably a fortune.

You wondered briefly if you could just use aluminium foil and tape the shit up. There was nothing of value to steal in your apartment anyway, and if aluminium foil could keep meals warm, it definitely worked with a house too right ?

You sobered up quite a bit, but you were also very drunk when this event happened, so your mind was still in that cloudy weird phase where your priorities were…interesting.

You worried more about the broken window at first, than about that guy who just launched through it.

A guy.

Not just any guy.

You saw that guy before.

He was one of those night vigilante your crazy hometown was filled with…RED HOOD !!

“Thick thighs”, is the first thing you thought right after you recognized him (priorities).

The second thing you thought was that you needed another drink, and so you downed what was your fifth one, but with that crazy thing happening ended up being on the same level as if it was a second one. You were tipsy, but not “drunk” anymore.

The third thing that came to your mind was…Is he still alive ?

No cause, he was like, just laying there, on your living room’s floor, not moving.

“…Outch.”

Oh. He spoke.

So he ain’t dead. Good, means you can have another drink then, you don’t need a clear mind to call an ambulance or something.

Oddly enough, in your half-drunk half-sober state, this sounded completely reasonable. Nevermind if Red Hood had some internal bleeding or something. He talked. He was probably fine.

A minute passed, and you just sat there, sipping up your tequila in between taking a pinch of salt and biting into a piece of lemon.

Salt, tequila, lemon. Great remedy against heartbreaks.

Wait, were you heartbroken ? Really ? You couldn’t really recall that fact now. But, yeah…it was the reason why you were drinking right ? Because right now, all you could think about was the fact that this Red hood guy had abs for days…

This unforeseen event sobered you up quite a bit, but the two shots you just took kinda brought you back to the same state than you were before.

Well. Not quite. You were drunk as hell again, but seemed to have avoided the “sad phase”. Instead, Red Hood bursting quite literally through your window took you to another road.

The : “Cool, I got a drinking buddy phase”. Well, taking for granted he didn’t have any internal bleeding and wouldn’t die while biting into a lemon wedge.

“Tough day ?”

You ask him, as he slowly sits up and shakes his head, trying to regain his senses. He looks towards you and seem surprised (or at least you think he is, because he wears a mask so…kinda hard to tell).

************

Jason definitely thought he was alone in this place, because no sane person would just sit there, not saying anything, as someone simply jumped through their window. Nope, most people would just freak out. Scream.

He knows, because it’s not the first time he falls through a window during a night on duty. And every single time it happened, people freaked out. Screamed. Threw stuffs at him, or hid away begging for their life to be spared.

And yet here you were, half a bottle of tequila in front of you, surrounded by lemon wedges you bit into, and table salt all over your hand, just staring at him curiously. And did you just say : “tough day” ?

Well, Jason guessed the empty half of the bottle was why you were so chilled about it all. He sat up, and slowly got back to his feet.

Usually, going through a window meant the end of the night for him. He’d go back to one of his secret stash, patch himself up and get some rest. Most of the time, he fell through windows because someone pushed him or threw him there…Though today, he just embarrassingly missed a step and fell by himself.

Of course, no one would ever now he tripped while jumping from one building to another (you lived on the last floor) and went careening into your home (and life). Nope, the official story would be that he fought a fierce enemy and was thrown into that window. Finding fake villains name was easy, given how truly ridiculous some could be.

Tim and Damian were still after the “Illusive Blue Man” that he totally made up that one time he walked into a poll and had a huge black eye that he couldn’t quite explain…Oh man, he had to stop telling such elaborate lies and just say “I fought with a few guys last night” without more explanation.

But he couldn’t help it. And those kids believed everything he said, it was too tempting…But for now, this wasn’t the issue. Nope.

He did a quick check of his body and knew he wasn’t really hurt (thanks “dad” for the amazing body armor ugh ?), so he was planning on leaving that poor girl’s house and send a mystery check in the mail to pay for the damage (money stolen from a certain Bruce Wayne of course, as if he would pay himself).

Yup. He was just gonna stand up, and go on his way and…somehow, he found himself sitting on the stool opposite side of this mysterious girl, and now she was peppering salt on his hand ?

“Salt”, she says, and she has a cute drunk voice. Jason almost forgets he just went through a window a few minutes ago.

“Tequila”, she continues, downing her drink and pointing at the one she poured him. He doesn’t even care the she poured it in a cereal bowl that she didn’t even seem to have clean…He drunk worst things in worst recipient. He turns away to take off his mask and so that she can’t see his face, and “bottom’s up”.

“Lemon !” she finishes, biting into the sour fruit and spitting it in the direction of the trashcan but missing completely. The lemon wedge goes to lost itself amongst his fallen brothers…

Jason bites into his own lemons, and spits it. Right into the garbage.

There’s a slight pause, where she just stares at the trashcan, and then at Jason, back to the trashcan, and then turns to him again and simply says :

“Wow.”

************

So. This was surreal.

Here you were. In your home. Taking tequila shots. With…Red Hood.

One of Gotham’s night vigilante. The most violent one. But the dude seemed chilled. He was holding his liquor really well.

And now you were talking about your broken heart, telling him the story as if he’d been your friend for years. And he was listening. Intently. And reacting to what you were saying. It had been a LONG time, since you had this kind of talk with anyone, and despite the fact you were drunk, you still noticed how nice it felt to have someone to talk to. Someone that genuinely listened.

“And then he slept with her !” you say angrily.

“Nooooooo !?!”

“Yes, he did ! He slept with…with…what was her name…”

“Nicole. From accounting.”

“Right, Nicole from accounting ! That bitch ! She always just…counts and shit ! And he slept with her ! Nicole from accounting ! Whom he met thanks to me, by the way ! At a partyyyy !! At my wooooork !!”

“What an ass.”

“Right ?! Oh but he had such a good ass though…Quite firm. But whenever he wore jeans, it was super flat.”

“So, not such a good ass in the end then ?”

“I guess not. You have a good ass. Popping right out in this outfit of yours.”

Red Hood chuckles, and the sound of his laughter makes you forget that you just said something incredibly embarrassing. His voice is…nice. Deep. Manly. You like it. You wanna make him chuckle some more, so you say, hoping :

“And it looks very firm. Not just quite firm.”

It works. He snorts and it’s very cute. Oh wow. He can be sexy and cute. Full package. You smile a bit dreamily.

For a second, he’s lost in that smile of yours, and there’s a silence installing itself in the room. A comfortable one. That you break :

“Ok. So now, he’s not that perfect anymore ! He got no ass ! Penalty points ! I never notice how un-assed he was before…”

Jason smiles and damn. He’s hot.

Somewhere along the way, he stopped turning his face away from you whenever he took a shot, and just ended up taking his helmet off. He was probably hoping that you’d black out or something, so you wouldn’t remember his face (or he just didn’t care).

In any case, you were pretty sure you never saw him before. His face kinda reminded you of an old memory. Of someone you saw somewhere long ago, when you were a kid…Which wasn’t really a big help right ?

Right. You had no idea who he was. And in your drunken state, probably couldn’t piece anything together anyway. So even if you did know who he could be, you wouldn’t know in the end anyway…Makes perfect sense right ?

What you knew was : he’s hot.

This white streak in his hair did something to you that you couldn’t explain. And that jawline ? You would love to get cut on that bitch. It could actually cut a bitch, you were sure of it. Those blue eyes ? You’ve never seen someone with such blue eyes. And did you mention to yourself how muscular he was ? Because man you only saw guys like this in magazines !

But beyond his handsome features, he seemed like a nice guy. Like he was listening to you, a total stranger. And this realization suddenly raised your guard up.

You also thought that your ex-cheating-boyfriend was a nice guy. And come to think of it, who the hell just barge in someone’s home like that, and actually stay to drink tequila shots ?! Wait but…in your guts…it’s not like with your ex.

You don’t think he’s a nice guy. You know he is.

************

There’s a visible shift in your mood, after this realization. So far, you talked to him about your broken heart freely, and he listened.

Oddly enough, no words that came out of your (perfect) mouth bored him. Jason wasn’t sure wether it was the alcohol or not, but you captivated him.

But in a split second, and without him knowing why, your features changed. You were now frowning. Like an unhappy little kid. It was kinda cute, but he didn’t like it because…why were you frowning ?

He tries to lighten up the mood and says :

“Well here you go. See, you didn’t loose the perfect guy, his ass was flat in jeans. Can’t work with that, can you ? I bet we can find other flaws. Make you realize he actually was a looser.”

Your guard is up, but you can’t help but smile a bit, plus you were frowning just now because you realized you just knew you could trust that total stranger, and it was so weird….

Besides, no harm in indulging this, because you’re pretty sure it’ll make you feel better to try and see the bad side of your ex-boyfriend, not just his good ones. No one was perfect. And so, still a bit careful, you say :

“Well…He never got any of my Tv shows or movie references.”

“Well, here’s a point to take off of his “perfectness”. Doesn’t get pop culture references. Deal breaker.”

“Yeah…Yeah you’re right. It is. He also used to hate when I made jokes. I like puns ya know ? Terrible ones. Well, he was always embarrassed whenever I made them in public.”

“Ashamed of his girlfriend, doesn’t sound very gentlemanly, right ?”

“Yeah. It doesn’t. Maybe he wasn’t such a perfect gentleman…He also used to not want to go out with me if I didn’t wear any make-up and was dressed just casually.”

“What you mean, he never just went out with you ?”

“We only went out on dates. I had to dress up. I could be casual home though…”

“Well goodie, the man let you be yourself when you were home. Big deal. To be honest, sounds like a douchey move.”

“That was kinda douchey…I never cared what he looked like.”

And it’s true. For you, physical appearance wasn’t everything. And sure you thought your ex was hot and all, but only because you liked his personality too. You liked his jokes, you were never ashamed of anything he said.

And right now, sure that stranger that bursted through your window was hot, but the reason you felt like you could tell him things was because he just made you comfortable by his mere aura. Because he gave you such a good vibe.

You never were fully about appearances. It was always just a bonus for you…So it never occurred to you why your ex would only hang out in public with you if you were pampered. Like he used to hate when you just wore hoodies and no make-up, even if you didn’t need make-up to be beautiful.

Comes to think of it, he was very much about appearances…Uh. Interesting. You never realized that before.

You turn to Red Hood, and the look on your face says it all. You’re slowly realizing maybe you didn’t just lost “the one”. The vigilante says :

“Ok, so : no ass, no humor apparently, doesn’t get pop culture references, and was kind of a jerk when it came to going out with you…”

“He did tell me often that I was beautiful though. Including when I just woke up from a night out, and was awful looking.”

“Yeah, but he never went out with you looking like that. He shouldn’t feel ashamed of hanging out with you looking like that. Just like he shouldn’t feel embarrassed when you joke. He can be exasperated, like if you really make bad puns, sure. And he can think it’s unfunny…But embarrassed ? No.”

“I guess…I never thought about it.”

“Well let me tell you, as someone who does not know neither you nor him personally, he sounds like a bit of a jerk. Let’s not forget he cheated as well. Like, that’s not something good people do. Especially not with…Nicole from accounting.”

“Nicole from accounting…Yeah. They’re together now though.”

“So ? He should’ve broken up with you if he realized he liked her. That’s the right thing to do. Trust me on that, I put villains behind bars for a living, I know what’s right or wrong.”

“I heard you kill criminals.”

“Used to. I used to kill criminals, I had issues. I’ll tell you one day if you wanna. It’s a real tear jerker story. With clowns and crowbars. And I’m telling you that because I’m drunk, right now. Also, if we want to be specific, I don’t actually make a living out of putting villains behind bars. Like, I don’t get paid or anything…”

Jason finds himself ranting about anything that comes to his mind, and though he hears himself claim it’s because of the alcohol he’s saying all this, he realizes maybe there’s something else making him want to talk.

You. A total stranger he walked upon. Or rather, went-through-the-window upon. Who didn’t freak out when he went through said window. And instead, invited him over to have tequila shots.

Because, according to your grandmother, the best remedy to…basically any problems in life, was “salt, tequila, lemon”.

“She was a wise woman.”

He says, and you turn to him, clearly not understanding what he was talking about.

“Who ?”

“Your grandma. For saying that salt, tequila and lemon was a great remedy against heartbreaks and all.”

“Oh. Yeah. I wouldn’t know, I never met her. She died before I was born.”

“Well what she passed on to your parents is great.”

“What ?”

“Well, that “salt, tequila and lemon” thing, I assume she said that to your mom or dad, and then they said that to you, and then it became your grandma’s advice. Right ?”

“…Nah. It’s an excuse I made up. Whenever I need to justify something, I just say “like my grandma said, ain’t no shame in eating an entire tub of ice cream if you want to”, and then people are just like “oh yeah, cool”, because when you say the word “grandma”, then it gives a perspective to your words ya know ?”

Jason had no idea what you were on about, but he loved it. You seemed to be very smart. And witty. And funny. The hell did that guy cheated on you for ? And why was he ashamed of going out in public with you when you weren’t dressed up ?!

You currently wore “Hello Kitty” pyjamas, had absolutely no make up on, and your hair was a mess, and he thought you looked gorgeous.

“Why are you so nice ?”

Your question takes him by surprise, and for a few seconds he doesn’t register it and just says : “ugh ?”

“To me. Why are you so nice to me ? Is it the alcohol ? Does it make you nice ? Or are you just nice to every stranger ? Every girl you destroy the windows of ? Or are you like my ex ? You seem nice, but then you go off and cheat on your girl simply because you like another girl and you’re too cowardly to break up with your current girl ?”

Jason hiccups slightly, and says :

“No, I’m not nice to any girl I met. I’m actually usually kind of a jerk, too “brutally honest”. But you…I don’t know. You give me good feelings. Oh and here’s to add on his flaws list. “Coward”. Can’t even break up with a girl, has to wait to get caught red-handed and break her heart. Cooooward. Bad flaw. Kind of guy who runs in the face of danger, instead of standing by you.”

It’s probably the fact that he said “you give me good feelings” that spurs this in you. That gives you a new clearer perspective on things.

“My heart wasn’t broken.”

It’s a shock, to you. This realization. This sudden feeling jumping in your face. You…are not heartbroken. You’re mad. You’re frustrated. You feel betrayed. You feel a crazy burning anger towards your ex for toying around with you like that. For not having the balls to just break up, after spending two years together.

He was suppose to know you. To be your friend. Things could have turned out better. He could have just come up to you, say the truth, and…You were pretty sure you’d still be friend. Because he really was a great guy.

He really was all the good thing you though about him. He made a mistake, an unforgivable one in your book. But he was a great guy.

He was just…not your great guy. Not anymore at least.

And you realized, there, quite drunk, that…It was ok.

Your heart wasn’t broken.

Your pride was. Your trust was. But your heart ? …Maybe you weren’t completely in love with him. You were best friends, yes, but love ? Maybe it wasn’t love…

Your heart wasn’t broken.

“My heart isn’t broken.”

You tell Red hood, looking at him right in his wonderful ocean blue eyes. And he looks right back at you, and just nods. Just like that. And then he pours you one last tequila shot.

Because like your grandma would say : “When you make great discovery about yourself…Salt, tequila, lemon”.

************

It took you only a few hours with him to realize that you weren’t in love with your ex, and that was kinda scary. Because this realization didn’t come from nowhere.

Nope.

But when he said that your ex broke your heart, you felt obligated to tell him that no. No your heart wasn’t broken. You were sad and angry, yes, but not heartbroken. For you, in that moment, it was important for this total stranger to know you weren’t actually in love.

Hell, you didn’t even know yourself you weren’t that in love before you talked to him. It just came as a sudden, yet utterly true revelation.

Because, and this wasn’t the alcohol speaking…You felt incredibly attracted to that guy. To Red Hood. Not just because of the white streak in his hair, and the eyes, and smile, and voice, and abs, and thick thighs. That too, sure, but not only…Nope.

Nope. Not because of this.

But because he had a tough day (he said so himself, explaining to you how he went through the window…he was fighting a super-villain when he got flung through your window, tough tough time ahem), and yet he sat with a crazy lady that peppered salt on his hand and practically forced him to take a tequila shot…

Because you could see in his eyes, and felt in your guts that he didn’t have an easy life…and yet he took a break from whatever he was doing to just sit with you and listen to you. He didn’t even make sense, that you trusted those feelings so fiercely. And yet, you did. Because he listened to you.

He saw you were struggling and he stayed. And though you felt you couldn’t trust anyone at that time…You oddly felt like he was ok.

Like he wouldn’t be the kind of guy to cheat, or run in the face of danger, leaving you all alone to fight off demons.

In a few short hours, you fell for this guy more than you ever fell for your ex.

What did that say about you uh ? …That was pretty pathetic…

************

Jason didn’t think that you were pathetic at all.

On the contrary. If he went to seat with you, and drink with you, is because he was instantly mesmerized by you.

And though he didn’t know at first why, now he was sure of it.

It’s because you didn’t freak out. And something told him it wasn’t only because you were a bit drunk (he fell in drunk people’s home before…none reacted like you).

Nope. It was because you were special. He just knew it. Special in every way. Funny. Beautiful. Genuinely listening to him when he was speaking.

He peppered his own problems within your story, as you told him. And you listened. Hell, even referenced a few things he said early on, way later, while you were crazy drunk. You listened.

You gave a total stranger that seemed to have a tough day some salt. And tequila. And lemons.

And then you cared. You asked him a thousand times if he was ok, and he basically had to take off his armor to prove it so (to your eyes’ greatest pleasure…mm mm mm those muscles).

Captivated. He was captivated by you. It was strange, and though he knew it was because you were special, he still was unclear as to why his feelings were that strong.

For someone he just met. And barely knew. And only knew while drunk.

You were just…Special.

************

It was surreal. The all thing.

What started as a night where you planned on wallowing your pain and drinking…ended up changing your life.

And no one could convince you that it wasn’t Fate. Because what were the odds that Red Hood would fall through YOUR window after tripping (yeah you didn’t buy that “fighting super-villains thing” at all) ?

What were the odds of his timing being so perfect, arriving just before you started to cry ? Because there was no doubt in your mind that if he had come a few seconds later, he wouldn’t have stayed.

He would have found a crying mess, and maybe he would have tried to confort you but…You wouldn’t have answered. In your “sad phase”, you only cry and whine. He would have eventually left. And the wonderful talk you’d just have, would never have happened.

But instead. He came right before your lips touch that fatal shot of tequila that would have brought you into the “sad phase”. And took your drunkness down a notch. Rerouted your evening.

You weren’t wallowing anymore, you were ranting.

Sharing your anger and frustration.

And he helped you realize that your ex wasn’t that perfect…That maybe it was just not meant to be…After all, he cheated on you.

Uh. What a shame. You didn’t even know his name…”Red Hood”…

You wished you knew his name.

************

The morning lights were rising, and the bottle of tequila was long gone.

There were still salt and lemons though. For some reason, you decided to buy the entire grocery store’s stock of lemons.

Red Hood stood up, and said he had to go.

He was nice about it. Said it was a pleasure to have spend the night with you. You both laughed about the innuendos that ensued.

You were exactly on the same page. And he understood all your joke referencing to pop culture…

But it was time for him to go. And he apparently had no intention of telling you his real name. He didn’t hint either at ever coming back to see you again.

And there was that. Just a nice night, spend talking to a genuine friend that you’ll never see again.

A genuine friend that you didn’t even know a few hours before.

Maybe it was the alcohol speaking. Maybe not.

And even if you ended up never seeing him again, this evening truly changed your life…At least, it saved you from a heartbreak. Made you realize it wasn’t that.

Though, now, as he climbs out of the window again (he couldn’t possibly use the front door), you feel like the actual heartbreak is starting.

Grandma’s remedy against heartbreak ? Right.

Salt, tequila, lemon…

But the tequila is all gone.

“I’ll send someone to fix that window…Sorry again about that. …Bye.” are his last words, and then he’s out.

And the tequila is all gone.

************

…

Days pass by in a blur.

Salt. Tequila. Lemon.

Ugh. But you don’t want to this time. You don’t want to get drunk to forget.

You don’t want to forget him. And you know it’s ridiculous to get that worked up over a guy you met one night and that will never come back. That you didn’t even know the name of.

This entire night was weird anyway.

Getting drunk with a dangerous night vigilante. Pouring your heart out to him, and him doing the same. The hell were you even thinking ?

Salt. Tequila. Lemon.

That would be a good idea to do this right now, because man…your heart hurt. More than when you discovered your ex sleeping with Nicole. From accounting. But you can’t resolve yourself to drink. To forget. Nope. Instead you…

*Knock knock knock*.

Uh ? You take a quick look at your clock in the kitchen.10 pm. Who the hell is coming at 10 pm ?! It can only be bad news. Especially in Gotham…You peep into the eyehole and…

WHAT ?!

You open your door quickly, and…

“Told you I’d send someone to fix your window.”

It’s him. It’s Red hood. But in…civilian clothes.

His ass doesn’t look flat in jeans.

He’s holding a window wrapped in cardboard, and there’s a toolbox at his feet.

“Yeah, you did…come in.”

************

Jason Todd.

That’s his name. And connections are fast to be made in your brain. Jason Todd. Bruce Wayne’s adopted son. That supposedly died…ten years ago.

And is Red Hood now. Oh. It makes sense. Even his little “killing criminals” thing while Batman never killed. You easily put two and two together.

Red Hood. Jason Todd. Bruce Wayne.

Wow. Can’t believe you never guessed that before. Of course Bruce Wayne is Batman. He’s got the motive, the means, the excuses…It’s so obvious. And yet, you never realized. And no one else in Gotham ever realized.

Jason Todd.

Now you know his name.

And he’s fixing your window. Nobody ever fixed windows for you before (even those who broke it).

Um. To add to the “perfect man” list : “Handy”.

Jason Todd.

He quickly works the window up, and then he turns to you. While he was working you talked, as if you knew each other for years. Joking around. Like old friends. Like old extremely good and close friends.

It fits. It clicks. It’s natural. You and him, him and you.

Barely knowing each others, and yet knowing each others the best.

Jason. Todd.

He turns to you now, and with a smirk, he says :

“Ya know, my grandma always say that when something good happens to you, you need to celebrate. And I feel like this, right now, you and I, though I have no idea what we’re doing and where it’s going…Well it’s still something to celebrate. And she always says, my grandma, that to celebrate perfectly you need…”

You smile.

Yeah. You don’t know where this thing between you two is going, but you do know that you never met someone who so fully understood you.

And in such a short span of time. And you know you’re not mistaking. It’s a feeling too strong to be a mistake.

He came back to fix your window for god’s sake. And trusted you enough to tell you his actual name. Without a second thought. Which meant everything. Especially since from all the hint he let slip through last time you saw each others, about his father, well…let’s just say telling people his real name wasn’t really something he was used to.

But it just works. It fits. It clicks. It’s not like with your ex, because you don’t think you know it does. It just does. The fact that you say those next few words in perfect sync finishes to convince you :

(“…And she always says, my grandma, that to celebrate perfectly you need…”)

“Salt, tequila, and lemons.”

______________________________________________

I’m so mad the Tumblr app crashed and I deleted the original post...Y’all were great and reblogged the hell out of it ! Which is why it got so many notes in such a short span of times. And feedbacks. I haven’t had that many feedbacks on a story in a long time. So just one last time and I won’t bother you with that again : Please, if you enjoyed this story, don’t hesitate to reblog it and share it with others. People who don’t follow me can’t really find my stories anymore so...you’re a big help by spreading them. It’s always very encouraging.

And if you got the time, feedbacks are always hella appreciated and always make my day a little brighter <3.

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lambvein · 4 years

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Cheerful Host-part 3 (Reupload)

“Wh…what aw wou gawna do to me naw?” I tried to speak through my plush lips with little success.

“Anything we fucking want to!” Juggs taunted.

“You have been a thorn in our side for too long samantha. Always getting good grades, obeying the rules, achiveing scholarships…but that all ends right here now that WE own you!” Nicki spoke in a menacing tone.

“Allow us to demonstrate” Juggs said before the girls took full control back of my body and started working my tits vigorously and fingering our pussy.

“Aw gawd pwease stawp!” I pleaded…they ignored me and continued until I nearly reached climax before abruptly stopping.

“No NO!” I shouted as i was cucked by my own body.

The girls laughed at me as the stuck my arms and legs out to their sides as if I was in invisible bondage.

“You know what would make this even funner?” Juggs asked her fellow body pilots.

“What?” the bimbos asked in unison.

“We need some hot chicks in charge of samantha’s ass and pussy. What do you say samantha?” I tried to object but britney sealed my lips shut. “Ill take that as a yes. Lets recruit some bimbos, girls!” Juggs cheered

The girls strutted me down to a local prep school by the name of regent high. A school for low class parents to send their dumb kids. Little did I know what was waiting for me as I was forced to enter the school…four bimbos lined up infront of me. All in cheerleading outfits. Two of them had asses that would put nicki minaj to shame. One of them had thick, huge blonde hair down to her ass and the last one was thin and short but had a gorgeous face.

Britney spoke through my mouth “ready to join the party ladies?”.

The cumsluts squealed as Juggs took over my mouth once more and began chanting her familiar scripture that got me into this mess. I tried to intervene by speaking up but my mind was pushed to the back of all these sluts! I passed out again.

When i awoke I felt even heavier…without my control my legs stood up and walked to the nearest girls room.

“I LOOK LIKE A PORNSTAR!” I shouted in terror.

I wanted to cry but the girls wouldnt let me. I now had gorgeous thick, huge blonde hair that extended past my ass, pussy lips twice the size and sensitivity as they were which is probably what the short bimbo was there for, and a huge ass virtually rivalling the size of my jugs.

“Look at us!” Juggs said as she spun us around to admire her work. “Care to introduce yourselves ladies?” Juggs asked her new guests.

“Im candy, your pussy”

“Im kim and im a part of your ass”

“Im beverly but you can call me boulders, im the other half of your ass”

“and im cass, your hair!”

I wanted to shiver…I wanted to cry…I wanted to be free from these SLUTS but I just stood in the mirror and continued to be modeled against my will.

“Cmon ladies…lets see what kind of torture this body can handle” candy suggested.

I immediately left the ladies room to presumably be tortured in the most kinky way they could think of. I let out a weak gulp as I realization of what was going to happen set in.

#merge #bodypossession #bodycontrol #bodyinvasion #thick and curvy #bombshell #overflowing #big hooters #volumptuous #thicc #blowup doll #doll transformation #huge lips #thick white girl #thick white teen #body expansion #ass expansion #hourglass expansion #transformation

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mickey-milkovich · 4 years

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ok - my love, @lucasseliott, tagged me in like 90 tag game things the past few months and I PROMISE that I always plan to do them but then I don't have the time or don’t have anyone to tag or i’m like leaving the house but!!!! hurrah!!!!!! she’s just tagged me and i’m actually at home and i’m not in the middle of a conversation and i’m not eating so LET’S DO IT!!!!

charlotte-gets-tagged-in-stuff-by-lucy-and-it-honestly-means-the-world-and-makes-me-so-happy-that-she-thinks-of-me-and-im-sorry-this-took-so-long master post

1) put your music on shuffle and write down the next 20 songs that come on, no skipping

Grew up at midnight by The Maccabees // The waves by Bastille // Someday soon by KT Tunstall // Pretty shining people by George Ezra // Postpone by Catfish and the Bottlemen // When the sun goes down by Arctic Monkeys // Baby by Rudimental // Glamour puss KT Tunstall // Taste it by Jake Bugg // Stand by your gun by George Ezra // Demons by Imagine Dragons // Flowers by Bastille (from other people’s heartache IIII) // William Powers by The Maccabees // Silence by The Maccabees // Emoticons by The Wombats // What you know by Two Door Cinema Club // No good in goodbye by The Script // Trampolining by The Wombats // Not nineteen forever by The Courteeners // Saving my face by KT Tunstall

(idk why KT Tunstall kept popping her head up it’s been a long while)

2) the 10 ten songs you are listening to most right now

ok idk if there’s some official way to check this but these songs have been on repeat lately (some you may be able to tell why lmao)

Take it out on me by White Lies // If I stay by Mumford and Sons // Pills by Love Fame Tragedy // Wildfire by SYML (and crying while I listen) // O.D by Britney Stoney (this song is from that Churchill advert where the dog is skateboarding along lmao) // Taro by Alt-J // Dance hall days by Wang Chung (this was in some film I watched and I was like omg???? what’s this bop???) // Head over heels by Tears for Fears (I’ve had some kind of tears for fears megamix playing round and round in my head for like a week???) // Cherry wine by Hozier (I don’t know if you know him?) // Remember by Seinabo Sey

3) Describe yourself in 9 pictures you have on your phone, you can’t download or search new pictures

(Ok this was SO hard because I only have like 50 picture on my phone because the memory is always running out lmao)

4) post your lock screen, your home screen and the last song you listened to

5) Post 6 random facts about yourself and tag your 10 favourite followers

1. Little Comets are my absolute fave band (idk why none of their songs came up in the shuffle before THEY HAVE SO MANY) and I’ve seen them live like 8 (????) times and they are always amazing

2. I speak a very small amount of Italian (not very well)

3. I love to sew and there is fabric all over my room and it’s a MESS

4. I’ve never watched any james bond films and when I told my coworker he looked like he'd just been shot?????

5. We haven’t put our christmas decorations up yet so that will probably be my job for tomorrow

6. I made myself a pulled pork wrap/burrito thing for my lunch at work today and it was SO good

Ok I’m going to leave it there for now because no other bugger will even bother to read this??? If you do, please do let me know???????? - pahahaha I’m so irrelevant on tumblr these days - I’m just a mum who pops her head round the door and tries to join in with the kids. I’m just shouting into a void and Lucy is there looking at me like “who else are you talking to it’s just me here??” 🙃🙃🙃 hahahahahahahhahah

Lucy, once again thank you so much for always tagging me in these it genuinely means the world and I always love reading or looking at what you are sharing!!! 💕💕💕💕

#ask tag #tumblr tag #about me #me #imagine if after i spent like an hour writing this tumblr crashed #ha #haa h a #music tag

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isthatcanada · 5 years

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im lowkey fucki g scared because my best friend and me stayed over at my boyfriends house today and igot drunk and my boyfriend drank too, but i somehow emded up giving my friend best friend a lap dance(which i promised her jokingly but was okay with since we have this joking tension between us), but somewhere in the middle of it the two glasses of whiskey mix i had kicked in and i cant remember the rest of the night. apparently i asked my boyfriend to turn on britney spears and then i gave my friend the lapdance whilr dressing down to my underwear. my boyfriend and i havent been together for long at all so that apparently was the forst time he saw me in undewear so thats funny. apparently my boyfriend tried to get me to wear a hoodie cause cold and all but i refused and danced around him, dodging him to the point where it got really upsetting so he grabbed me and tried to get me to hecking calm down (props to me btw, couldnt walk straight but somehow dodge a 1,90m lowkey buff guy). he got me to wear a hoodie but then had a lowkey mental breakdown cause he struggled with being so rough as to grabbing me like that. he apparently started crying and went outside, i somehow got my shorts on and eanted to go after him, my friend stopped me and said he probably wants to be alone and i shiuld give him time, i went to puke at the sink, my boyfriend came back inside and i was like !!!! whats up!!! but he didnt really tell me and went away again so i was freaking out, then my friend told me to lay down which i did and then i fell asleep, my boyfriend came back i to the room still visibly distressed and crying, my friend tried to confort him but he didnt really say what was up so they just sat there for 10m, my boyfriend left again, then came back to lay down next to me and then fell asleep too. nice. apparently more happend but yhats just all i know and got told, Fl

#juju #remember #my drunk endevours

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smoshimagine · 6 years

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I’ve been bouncing this idea around in my head for a while but could you do a head cannon or one shot about Damien x reader, where the reader admits to being poly and that she has a crush on his best friend, Shayne? Maybe how he’d react to it and stuff??

Fuckign,,,, yeah?????

You and Damien had probably been together for a couple of months at this point, and Damien liked to believe you were both open with each other. Well, that was for the most part. You never really talked about being polyamorous since you were nerveous about Damien’s reaction. Even though he had always been supporting, previous partners you had were a bit upset by the fact.

But you just kind of acted like it wasn’t there, which, yeah was unhealthy, but what else could you do? But, unfortunately, it didn’t really feel like you could keep acting like it wasn’t there. Since Damien was such close friends with everyone in Smosh, it wasn’t uncommon for Boze, Shayne, or anyone else to hangout with you two. And while Boze was an adorable woman, you were much happier with her as a friend than a potential lover. But you didn’t feel that way about Shayne. You loved being around him just as much as you did Damien. He was a handsome guy with a wonderful sense of humor and personality similar to Damien’s that you always liked.

Before you realized it, you eventually had a crush on your boyfriend’s best friend. And you didn’t know if it was noticeable or not. You attempted to just act normal, if not a bit more touchy or trying to make him laugh more. It made you feel like a highschooler. But the way he said your name made a comforting warmth spread across you in joy, something that happened when you first were with Damien.

You snapped out of your thoughts as Shayne shook your shoulder, trying to show you something on his phone. You laughed with him, it was a musical.ly fail he found of a furry girl dancing really off-sync to some song. But you looked up at the sound of Damien who looked as stressed and upset as he sounded. But he momentarily stopped, surprised to see you two hanging out without him. But he shrugged it off pretty quickly before sitting with you two. Shayne putting his phone away as he turned to him. “What’s going on?” You spoke, reaching for his hand to hold. “Some stuff is going on at the office and I’m kinda pissed, and you guys know I don’t get upset easily.” You and Shayne nodded in sync, letting the pale boy rant and rave about what was happening. And while you wanted to listen, you were subconsciously focusing on Shayne leaning his head on your shoulder to move closer and hear Damien better. You tried your best to ignore it as you looked at the boy in front of you instead, nodding at some parts and waiting til he was done. “That fucking sucks, dude!” Shayne exclaimed, sitting up properly again. “I know! And they aren’t telling us what they’re gonna do about it.” Damien let out a small huff before you squeezed his hand.

“Let’s go out and get some ice cream to make you feel better.” You suggested, smiling softly, causing the hard expression on his face to soften slightly. “Sure, Shayne, do you mind driving?” He asked, earning a small nod before the three of you stood up. Slipping on a pair of sneakers before following the two out to the car. The car ride being enthusiastic and filled with energy, Shayne trying his best to make Damien happy and take him out of the sour mood he was in. It was seemingly working, the two were ugly singing along to Britney Spears, over exaggeratingly dancing and laughing together. Soon enough you three has arrived to an ice cream parlor, seemingly empty except for the workers. Before walking in triumphantly and ordering milkshakes and a big sundae for the three of you to share.

“Do you wanna try some of my shake?” Shayne offered you, he had had cookies and creme shake, with cookie chunks, chocolate at the bottom and top, with a layer of vanilla in the middle. You grinned at him and nodded. “Holy shit, that tastes really good!” You were a bit surprised at how sweet it was, but it was pretty good. “Can I try yours?” He asked, you nodded slightly before sliding over your shake. “That tastes pretty good. I should order it next time.” After his sentence you two made slightly prolonged eye contact, causing you both to burst out into a laughing fit, adorably leaning on each other and laughing any time you made eye contact. Damien hurrying to get a photo of the sight, watching you two calm down. “Pose for a photo.” He said suddenly once you two stopped giggling. You lazily stuck up a surfer dude hand symbol and grinned at the camera, noticing Shayne also doing something stupid as the photo was taken. Watching him type out some caption as you drank some of your milkshake. Checking your phone to find he put the photo on his Instagram story, the caption being “on a date, kinda nerveous.” Even though it was a joke, you blushed at the idea of it being a date. Before brushing it off as Damien tried to get you to have some of the sundae.

After the ice cream date, you and Damien dropped Shayne off at his apartment. You were just thinking, and realizing you did have to talk to Damien. “Hey, angel?” You spoke softly as you stared down at your lap, feeling your nerves come over you.But Damien was more worried you called him angel, it was a pet name reserved for important moments or something that warranted it. So when you just suddenly said it, while also looking nerveous, this sounded a handful of worried alarms off in his head. Taking one hand off the wheel to hold your hand. “What’s wrong?” Instead of tiptoeing around it, you just decided to come forth with it. “I have a crush on Shayne, and I still really love you! But I just, a part of me wants to be in a relationship with both of you at the same time! But I’ve always been polyamarous and I’ve never brought it up cause I’m worried on your reaction! And I dunno how you would feel about the idea and just–” “Calm down.” Damien spoke suddenly, you had slowly started talking faster and faster, anxiety rushing through you. “Right, it’s just, I really love you and don’t wanna lose you. I’ve been scared to bring it up.” You finished as you finally arrived back at your shared apartment. “Let’s keep talking inside.” He spoke quietly as he got out of the car.

You two sat on the bed, feeling more comfortable in the cozy environment. “So, I love you too, and I’m really glad you talked to me about this, cause I don’t wanna have secrets.” He started off, trying his best to make eye contact even though normally he wouldn’t. “I can understand why you would like Shayne, he’s a great, handsome guy. I want you to be completely happy in this relationship! Even if it’s not just with me. I think we should talk about it when he’s here and see what he thinks, though. I think if he accepts and is comfortable with it, it’ll just take me time to get used to.” Damien spoke, trying his best to not stutter or say the wrong thing. You felt overwhelmed with emotions. “Well, if he does accept, which I doubt, we can all mutually discuss what we are and aren’t comfortable with. I want your full consent and what you are uncomfortable with if we’re doing this.” You said, squeezing his hand gently. Damien nodded slightly before pulling you in for a hug, which relieved so much anxiety you felt. Allowing yourself to cry into the hug as he rubbed your back. “I’m so lucky to have you.” You murmured, attempting to wipe your eyes as you pulled away. “Shush, you’re my world, im the lucky one here.” Damien let out a quiet chuckle.

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ninepercentnet · 6 years

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littlelovelymemes · 7 years

Text

✰ * º ❛ more popular text posts starters. ❜

‘ plot twist: you let someone in and they don’t fuck you over ’ ‘ you would not believe bill nye... if ten million Science Guys ’ ‘ the lack of cuddling i am experiencing right now is upsetting ’ ‘ why was shrek’s soundtrack so incredible like who sat down and decided that a movie about an ogre would have a beautiful rufus wainwright ballad followed by a smash mouth/eddie murphy cover of i’m a believer and how can i thank them ’ ‘ i justify my impulses by the fact i’m going to be dead one day and none of it truly matters in the grant scheme of things it’s that “treat yo self” nihilism ’ ‘ all i do is listen to music really loudly while i walk in circles and daydream :/ ’ ‘ but you are an entire universe and i am a bigger cooler universe where everyone skateboards ’ ‘ my insecurities have destroyed so many opportunities ’ ‘ maybe you and i exist together on a different wavelength than the rest of the world. perhaps, we are on a separate frequency. ’ ‘ will u still love me when im no longer young and ok looking ’ ‘ ʸᵉᵃʰᶜᵃⁿ ᴵ ᵍᵉᵗ ᵘʰʰʰʰʰʰ some fuckin physical affection ’ ‘ stop thinking about everything so much, you’re breaking your own heart. ’ ‘ concept: me traveling the world alone, figuring myself out, taking tons of cute aesthetic pictures, befriending kind strangers, drinking a cup of tea on a cute cafeteria, and trying out things for the first time. ’ ‘ holy shit thank god vine is gone like can you imagine all the vines about fidget spinners ’ ‘ me: reads the bad reviews of a book i didn’t like to seek validation ’ ‘ if you think you’ve hit rock bottom, just remember that my bank once froze my accounts because I bought a healthy ready meal at my local supermarket and they classed it an “uncharacteristic purchase” ’ ‘ i’m a dumbass and that’s just how it is ’ ‘ y'all actually seek validation from people that don’t give a fuck about ur feelings??? LMAO bitch me too why are we like this ’ ‘ special thanks to all the 10 year olds out there for making all those music lyric videos on youtube ’ ‘ i am so gentle and kind hearted... and stupid ’ ‘ there she goes again being over dramatic and by she i mean me ’ ‘ just letting everyone who’s ever told me a secret know that its safe with me (and my mom) ’ ‘ me n my eyebrows…………we been thru a lot ’ ‘ i wanna jump off a building and not die just relieve stress by slamming onto the sidewalk and then get up and go get a slurpee or something ’ ‘ all I want is vintage lingerie and good skin ’ ‘ nsfw: nobody’s safe from wonderwall ’ ‘ do you ever wish you could unmeet someone…. like,, we had fun times,, but it’s time for me to wipe my memory Sorry Bud ’ ‘ date a boy who reads. or better yet date a 37 year old recent divorcee with a highly diversified stock portfolio who’s looking to feel young again and can treat you to what you deserve ’ ‘ if you knew me in 7th grade i’m sorry ’ ‘ *cha cha’s real smooth away from academic responsibilities* ’ ‘ anyone else feel like they’re inherently worth less than everyone else ’ ‘ be open with your love and loud with your laughter. life is so much brighter when lived genuinely. ’ ‘ i really wish i could get a refund for all the love i’ve wasted on people like! repay my emotional labour your bill is in the mail ’ ‘ i’m such a tease. i’ll tell you how bad I want to fuck you and then probably fall asleep. ’ ‘ i’m crying my best ’ ‘ i want to be known as someone who’s full of love and radiates light ’ ‘ i’m in philosophy and were talking about how you can doubt everything’s existence except for your own consciousness and the guy that sits in front of me just turns around tears streaming down his face and goes “i am on so many drugs” ’ ‘ how fucked up would it be if an astronaut was coming back to earth and everybody hid for a bit ’ ‘ some kid just skateboarded down my street crying ’ ‘ do you ever get in an “i don’t know” phase in your life. where you literally don’t have a solid answer to anything. you. just. don’t. know. ’ ‘ which of the three pillars of modern music is your favourite, burnin’ up by the jonas brothers, beautiful soul by jesse mccartney or lucky by britney spears ’ ‘ i guess at this point i should just consider dating myself ’ ‘ there is no doubt in my mind i’m really that bitch ’ ‘ after you hit 21, you start forgetting your age cause ain’t nothing else to look forward to, besides sweet death. ’ ‘ why am i not currently in the italian countryside with a fruit plate wearing a light linen dress? unacceptable ’ ‘ hands are weird because one of them can do absolutely everything without a problem and the other one can’t even hold a spoon ’ ‘ remember to drink a fucking shit ton of water every miserable day of ur life ’ ‘ is he………you know…….*makes football throwing motion*….straight? ’ ‘ mATH, deATH -- wake up america ’ ‘ does anyone else have a resting bitch face™, but kinda enjoys looking intimidating ’ ‘ time flies when u take a 2hr depression nap in the middle of the day ’ ‘ roses are red, i’m going to bed ’ ‘ u know when ur hairs greasy and it makes u feel so so so bad about urself. and ur entire life. everything is awful bc my hair is greasy ’ ‘ i’m just so glad the word “ugh” was invented ’ ‘ just another day of loving with all my heart and believing in the universe ’ ‘ you know when dogs sit outside with their face turned towards the sun and their eyes closed and they look so relaxed and when you pet them they’re warm? that’s how I want to feel always ’ ‘ come into bed and listen to the rain with me ’ ‘ people are so petty and then here i am, me, an angel, ’ ‘ can someone please be proud of me like fuck i’m trying ’ ‘ concept: a really nice Italian restaurant but it’s spelled “spagooter” on the menu and the waiters won’t take your order unless you pronounce it like that ’ ‘ just found out neanderthal passed on the dna for depression and now we know why they stayed in caves and painted horses all fuckin day ’ ‘ i want kids but i’m scared they’ll blame me if they’re ugly ’ ‘ does anyone have any tips for not thinking about it ’ ‘ “what’s a queen without her king?” well, historically, better ’ ‘ i want something that doesn’t taste like alcohol but has a lot of alcohol in it ’ ‘ my kink is getting some fuckin sleep ’ ‘ i’m alive out of spite ’ ‘ not to vent but: fuck ’ ‘ i think i accidentally break my own heart a lot ’ ‘ can’t wait to be balls deep in love ’ ‘ why are there so many days?? i feel like we just had a whole day yesterday… they don’t stop ’ ‘ i walked in on my 4 year old nephew sitting alone on his bed eating grapes in the dark and i didn’t even get a chance to say anything before he said “i don’t have answers” ’ ‘ *adjusts my tinfoil hat* y’all are crazy ’ ‘ do raccoons have people hands or do we have raccoon hands? ’ ‘ mark your territory by crying on things ’ ‘ any size titty is lit ’ ‘ love lemon trees! i too am bitter but growing ’ ‘ my only constant is the black hair tie around my wrist. no mans gonna be there for me like this hair tie has. no ones presence is gonna be as reassuring ’ ‘ me???? tired???? sleepy??? yes constantly ’ ‘ the box says “four servings” but my heart says one ’ ‘ the lengths i would go to to both get attention and avoid it….astounding ’ ‘ i hope everybody is doing their best even tho we’re all doomed ’ ‘ young adult things: washing your colors with your whites because you don’t care you JUST don’t fucking care ’ ‘ I just want to help out all the people with no money but i am people with no money ’ ‘ bricks are just domesticated rocks ’ ‘ being nice is so easy just do it ’ ‘ lets start wearing cloaks and swords again. its time ’ ‘ classes are like a high level dora the explorer episode. person up front asks a question, stares at you blankly for a few seconds, and then answers their own question. ’ ‘ the average orgasm is 7 seconds. keeping a feral hog in your basement lasts for 5-16 years depending on your ability to care for it. the decision should be clear ’ ‘ will i ever have my shit together ’ ‘ i live in a time where a major selling point for food is that it uses “real” ingredients. ’ ‘ “what the fuck” is an emotion now and its the only one i have ’ ‘ it’s not a real party until you sneak away to the bathroom to question your existence as you stare at yourself in the mirror haha ’ ‘ every hard day you make it through makes you one day closer to stranger things season 2 ’ ‘ assert your dominance by calling your friends by their student i.d. number ’ ‘ i feel like each year has progressively gotten worse since the year of luigi ended ’ ‘ um that’s u’re* not ur ’ ‘ i wanna be a villain so I can just saunter everywhere. the heroes are always sprinting, always running. you ever seen darth vader run? hell no. and I ain’t about to either. ’ ‘ i have nothing to say but will i shut up? No ’ ‘ i cannot believe another week is like beginning we just finished one ’

#ask meme #askbox meme #rp meme #indie rp #inbox meme #sentence starters #rp sentence meme #sentence starter meme #rp sentence starters #rp ask meme #rp ask box meme #inbox memes #rp inbox meme #starters

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convndrums · 7 years

Text

here the FAWK she ( the semi-finished masterlist of all my characters ) is ! took way too long but hopefully as you proceed to click on the linque below you’ll know why smh but yep ! i’ll be adding their pages on my account when i’m done with them soon i hope and maybe come back with a bunch of connections for each character but for now this is all i got & smash this like or im me for plots i’d love to get on those finally xx

reintroducing amanda wheeler; intro & info page.

queen of irony. rich post- faux country gal who’s a loud homosexual and writes hetero fics/has an indie het smut for the absolute shits and giggles. dates a married woman she’s utterly in love with and will pull the life support cord for. said to be possessed by a possessed flapper. cute and knows it even though she looks like a republican. socially open & everywhere. morally grey.

reintroducing imogen yates; intro & info page. ( tw violence )

the grey area between your mom friend and your drunk aunt. happily vegan & owns a vegan restaurant called the fork, alt. the vegan cult’s lair. won’t kill you, but will convince you she really wants to. local brat tamer. minds her business via minding others. clashed head-first into nature’s very own reset button: amnesia. used to be satan and traumatized everyone. disgustingly active and accomplishing.

reintroducing ethan holland; intro & info page. ( tw suicide )

he is a sk8r boi, she said see ya later boy ( and meant it. they’re dating now. hey lourdes ! ) a nice person, so nice he doesn’t realize how fake he sounds/is. a certified headass. previously a bully/bully enabler, current guilty fuck. #torn. does the most for his loved ones. doesn’t remember his own birthday. googled foot fetishes once. trolls stan twitter with his fake selena gomez stan account when tumblr crashes. burned a sue of cide note with his name scribbled on it.

reintroducing sebastian miller; intro & info page ( tw violence )

kazimer sokolov whom. russian ex-cult member well-adjusted into a mundane life via lies, a fake canadian accent he’s ‘trying to get rid of’, being a twilight saga aficionado and a dickwad, a lame record store and a tumblr blog to keep himself sane by maintaining a general aesthetic and shitting on people and every discourse out there. knives/books sniffer. allegedly fucked a moose. probably kinkshames as a way to deal with his own “kinks” aka please keep the dead bodies away. ( im kidding i swear but [redacted] )

reintroducing prudence zima; intro & info page ( tw death )

parents died in a fire when she was two months old and it shows. idolizes avril lavigne & her favorite movie is lords of dogtown for aesthetics references. dude. social leech or effortless networker ? both. remains in her lane regardless. cry-types probably. here for a good time, not a long time. steals your stash and smokes you out with it. avid dick connoisseur. minimum effort lifestyle. either on her way to become a manager of some one hit wonder band that finds it’s demise in a freak accident, a drug dealer or god forbid, a guidance counselor; depends. mild cool girl syndrome.

reintroducing jennifer meade; intro & info page ( tw death, violence and abuse )

bi/pussy muncher and proud misandrist, first and foremost. remembers killing her brother very fondly. the one girl in a room to call when you want to kill a bug and you’re relieved until she kills it with her bare hand. tops. unstable & chaotic evil, respectively. the ginger devil. biased and has her minion whom she invests a great deal of her time in brain washing and obsessing over. supposedly here to make amends but that’s not happening any time soon.

reintroducing margot williams; intro & info page ( tw mental illness )

deserves better. very gay. all her friends are heathens xtra, take it slow. corrects typos in the gc. a nerdy editorial assistant daydreaming about publishing houses instead of the magazine she works for. lowkey shy and she’s angry about it. goes off if she must. jacks off to #knowledge and yuri anime. helps with homework and essays and takes the kids out. deadpan because we’re original but she swears it’s just the face & unresolved trauma. stans her therapist. unofficial older sister.

reintroducing chandler accardi; intro ( re-written ) & info page

needs to do better. dropped out of college for culinary school then dropped out of that too. was engaged to an absolute goddess he ultimately wronged ( with her damn best friend, bitch disgostin* ) and got kicked out to the curb. currently residing in the couch of his sister until things are resolved. thot-by-default & annoying. has like three ( 3 ) redeeming qualities. has never been told to shut up and it shows. works at buzzfeed.

reintroducing abel gautier; intro & info page

french and “confused”. lives a minimalist n’ expensive life. if american psycho & french kiss were the same movie. wine sniffer. the devil bakes croissants. will watch you die. takes grudges to the afterlife. gets attached but either ruins it or ruins it to spare everyone, himself included. falls in love a lot but knows how to calm the fuck down. very giving, fortunately. manipulative but isn’t too wild about bending everything to his will.

reintroducing simini gale; intro & info page ( tw abuse, violence & mental illness )

token white actress & character in rosie’s show. [ britney vc ] its me.... against dissociation. a loud mess with an intense mental state and anger issues dulled out by her prescribed meds and whatever pill she got in the bottom of her manager’s purse. dependent and distraught about it. grocery shopping for garbage food and attending comedy stand up shows half drunk as a hobby. stable ? where. very nice and super flighty. heels are hot. wishes she could fight someone without feeling the urge to actually fight someone.

reintroducing calvin o’shea; intro & info page ( tw mental illness )

it’s not just the depression more than the incredible self hatred. walks into rooms with his bad energy, grumpy mood and cunty attitude. graduated college just to shut his dad up. wants to die harder than edward cullen. just doesn’t give a shit. has a baby named freddie mercury ( also known as the antichrist, with alanis, his mortal literal enemy whom he absolutely despises and will not hesitate to put his dick back in again lbr ) who will probably grow up to talk shit about his parents whom he also mentioned in his tell-all book on ellen. works at his family’s bookstore that sucks the life energy out of college students nearing a mental breakdown.

reintroducing isabel pavia; intro & info page ( tw drug use )

contemporary dances her feelings away. too ambitious for her own good but knows what she’s doing. in a goth ass secret society ( here ) a.k.a her new found purpose. knows everything eventually. oddly trustworthy. doesn’t know what speaking loudly is, let alone yelling. loves the moon & has that moon app. had to take painkillers when she twisted her ankle very badly and would take them for a while for stress and performance reasons, but has stopped. a quiet angel.

reintroducing anastasia zeller; intro & info page

ambitious/multi-talented asshole. horror trash & an emotional/mental maze which translates well into her weird works on no sleep reddit and current horror comedy podcast. ( click here for info ). needs a therapist according to a friend, whom she dropped for saying that. will bite your head off. obsessed with her works to an unhealthy point. would love to establish a company and stuff out of it and is working on that. healthy relationships are a semi-foreign concept.

reintroducing morgan booker; intro & info page ( tw death )

vape-curious and takes photos of ghost towns and abandoned-everythings because #vision. had a roadtrip phase like the fake deep idiot he is. morally grey. genuinely here for a good laugh and spreading joy in the form of hover-friendships and taking lit candids of his friends. knows shit and comes off as a creep sometimes but does he really care. knows your mom’s name. lives in a disused hospital bc he’s marinating on that aesthetic.

reintroducing bowie harmon; intro & info page ( tw drug use & abuse )

part of a duo in a web series as the anxious n’ cackling mess. showcases her depressión & anxieté by her colorful wigs n’ new hair dyes. painful receptionist at a tattoo parlor. recovering addict who advocates for drug use. thinks tattooing a ruler on someone’s dick one day would be the peak of her accomplishments as a tattoo artist. daily bad decisions. “ it’s complicated. ” when asked about literally any relationship she has with anyone in her life. traumas include her failed singing career. an ex viner-by-association.

reintroducing shaheen bin baz; intro & info page ( tw violence & mental illness )

the physical deception of going through hell in a short amount of time with zero mental durability to begin with during midterms. trigger-anxious. will shoot your toes off your foot if caught off guard. aided in criminal operations with the brilliance of his mind in codes. would not mind dying. seasons your food. waters his crops in his balcony garden. the grey area between a super laidback dude and a crackhead with violent tendencies. nearing a mental breakdown probably.

reintroducing minka abbott-santos; intro & info page ( tw abuse )

defeats the evil stepmom stereotype one breath at a time. the human embodiment of a deer. gothic angel. alarmingly gets black swan. type to wake up to her staring at you from an armchair across the room, but lovingly, with a book she was reading in hand and two hot cups of tea; she was waiting to start the day with you. spooky until you get to know her and even more spookier when she’s ( note: calmly ) pissed but that’s extremely rare. gentle voice, soul and everything.

reintroducing reuben faulkner; intro & info page ( tw abuse & violence )

rekt hell prince. lived in an amish community with his family until he got kidnapped away from home when he was seven into an awful living situation. doesn’t remember if the gas leak that happened five years later and killed everyone was his doing or not. knows where his real family is after months of tracking them down but. blood kink under investigation. shady bouncer at a shady club. has issues he has no care or time to diminish. fights for the shits and giggles. leaves texts at read. leaves you alone for your own good and his own sanity.

reintroducing alexandra turunen; info page

wants to do everything and be everything and doesn’t know what to do with herself ( read: post-graduation identity crisis ) currently investing in a motorcycle for no reason. essentially jobless. a “retired” kathryn merteuil who “outgrew” her cunning ways since highschool but really only found new socially destructive interests. appears to be self-possessed but she’s #shaken. doesn’t care about how well she presents herself anymore after getting rejected by four universities and refusing to accept her father’s offer to pull some strings to get her in one. sleeps a lot.

reintroducing giuseppe del vecchio; info page ( tw death & drug use )

goes by pepe because well. son of italian oil peeps & is extra. said to be in a cult when all he’s in is this extra ass dining club that does the most for initiation ceremonies. ready to fall in love with you. goes to the king’s college in london and studies business & changes his minor way too often for everyone’s liking. into everything and will be down to do whatever. faux deep. mischievous shit. incredibly unbiased. had his rawrk n’ roll phase that died along with someone in a club literally. still has it but he knows god now & less drugs.

reintroducing kelian scott; info page ( tw death & drug use )

a father/father figure who tries™. runs a mechanic shop/chop shop because bad decisions and dire needs ( had his son to send to school and his daughter who passed away due to a disease he couldn’t afford to treat even after turning his shop into a chop shop. his wife then left him ). stares into the distance. wants the best for the kids but one of them is a junkie ( he doesn’t know yet ) and the other -- his niece -- is an orphan he’s worried about. thinks ahead 24/7. needs to pull out of this dull n’ depressing daily routine he has fallen into like the basic ass divorced dad he is.

reintroducing sal presley; info page

smexy trace & fingerprint detective. talks. the perfect illusion to bring home to your parents and friends. gets shit done which is both a good thing and a bad thing. looks calm, collected n’ well-rested but isn’t. his actual name is salvatore but no. knows how to mix drinks and more; used to showcase his multi-talented ass to make his ( currently ex ) fiancée look good now just himself. was engaged three times; two of those times with the same person. obsessive; gets into his job a little too intensely for no reason but #justice and maybe something else whom knows. loses sleep at least two nights a week as a habit at this point. has an extended family back home he misses occasionally. wishes he could calm down truly.

#smoke:intros #FINALLY RISING HOLY SH-#ill do some plotting n hopefully get on replies soonish hell yea lets GO!

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d-d-didnt-i · 5 years

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Joey Mcintyre Interview

September 10 2002

A former American pop idol offers Kelly Clarkson advice. Eight-times platinum artist Joey McIntyre explains how the ''American Idol'' winner can move beyond Simon's brand of pop schlock

Kelly Clarkson may have won ”American Idol,” but outsinging the likes of tune-challenged Nikki is nothing compared to the singer’s next challenge: surviving pop stardom. Just ask former New Kid on the Block Joey McIntyre. Thrust into the spotlight at age 12, the Boston native became a platinum selling artist (1988’s ”Hangin’ Tough” sold 8 million copies) who couldn’t get no respect from critics.

Since NKOTB split up in 1994, McIntyre has had a modestly successful solo career (1999’s ”Stay the Same” went gold) and he recently joined the cast of ”Boston Public.” Even better, he’s not in rehab or knocking over liquor stores. EW.com asked the former pop idol what Clarkson can do to bypass the pitfalls of sudden success.

What did you think of the final three contestants?

When Justin and Nikki sang, it was like watching a train wreck. I told a friend of mine, ”Man, I could judge, host, and win this f—ing contest!” But then Kelly came out, and I thought, ”Hey, maybe I couldn’t win after all.” The show was lucky to have her.

Kelly’s obviously talented, but is that enough to make her a star?

She has an amazing voice, but the really cool thing about her is she’s not only adorable, she’s a normal looking girl. That’s so great in this society of Christina Aguilera’s and Britney Spears. There are all these billboards of Kelly around L.A. right now, and she’s just got the best, most natural smile.

(Rest of interview behind the cut)

What do you think of that drippy single, ”A Moment Like This”? Is Kelly doomed to be a second rate Celine?

You know, that song’s going to be a hit. They may have taken the 5 best parts from songs of the last 20 years to make it, but I’ll admit it, I keep singing it. And yes, even though the album’s probably going to be kind of schlocky, it’s going to do really well. And hopefully on the next album she’ll be able to do more of what she wants to do.

What does Kelly need to do to survive the pressure cooker of fame?

For anyone it really comes down to family. I loved that her mother was crying during the final episode while her father was chewing gum, chomping away like he was watching a baseball game. That was perfect! On the other hand, Justin’s father, the prodigal father, was singing and grooving in $2,000 suits that you know Justin is going to be paying for a week from now.

Will Kelly always be stuck with the ”American Idol” label?

When I had a top 10 record as a solo act, I thought, No one will ever call me a New Kid on the Block again. But that’s just not true. So the important thing is that, when you’re doing what’s right for you, you don’t worry about that as much. It’s hard not to get caught up in the whirlwind of fame, and the New Kids definitely went through it, but that’s where family and your friends become so important.

Kelly is surely being swarmed with fans everywhere she goes. What’s the pop star secret to surviving the onslaught?

I’m honest with my fans. If I’m playing a concert and they won’t stop calling out for old songs, I’ll say, ”C’mon, no more New Kids s—.” But as my father would say, ”It’s showbiz. You can’t take yourself too seriously.”

Any pointers for the other finalists?

Sorry, but Nikki couldn’t sing her way out of a paper bag. But she should do eight shows a week in Vegas. That would be cool.

https://web.archive.org/web/20150927063929/https://ew.com/article/2002/09/10/former-american-pop-idol-offers-kelly-clarkson-advice/

#joey mcintyre #2002

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androgynousranchathleteoper-blog · 6 years

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You’re So Vain You Probably Think This Blog Is About You

I can’t tell you what a nuisance it is being a person who is in constant need of assurance. This blog and its mere existence is proof of my utter self absorption and indeed self deprecation (because balance is important). Pre historically there has been some poor decision making on my part when it comes to choosing someone to bump nasties with. Without going into too much detail, because I am zen af, my last boyfriend was the devil incarnate. Despite being forwarned about his less than desirable behaviours and some very bold warning signs, I ignored the advice of EVERYBODY IN HUMAN EXISTENCE and went out with him for three years. You can imagine my surprise when it inevitably didn’t work out. It was a terrible relationship, however, I have taken a lot away from it. Most importantly that my judgment cannot be trusted. Unfortunately my people reading skills have not improved over the years. When there is a willy involved all I see is sunshine and happiness while my friends and family watch on in horror as I climb into to bed with Jack the Ripper. So how does one tackle such a problem. Well I’ll tell ya… You run absolutely fucking everything by your friends and you listen to them. Remember your friends are the ones who know you and love you all the same. Your friends are your friends for a reason. Don’t ever forget why your friends love you and want you in their life. With that In mind this entry has been lovingly co-written, unknowingly, by one of my best friends. The text in bold are his text messages to me throughout a very brief encounter with a very unpleasant man. His responses are to the screenshots of the conversations between me and the gentleman in question. It really highlights how utterly useless I am but also how wonderful it is to have people in your life who care so much about your happiness and really make you laugh. The story, as always, begins with I met this guy… (Never a good start) through Tinder (also not good: side note this was months ago and I’ve actually now liberated myself from the hoe app - I have got enough material from those three months to last me a lifetime). Anywho, as with having a type and sticking to it (because that’s done me so many favours), it came as no surprise to me that we have friends in common. Natural instinct in these situations sends you digging. I ask one of the mutual friends for a brief Curriculum Vitae of the dude, the first thing she says is “he’s really into choking girls” I am screaming laughing actual speechless. This all sounds very alarming but in context it’s fine however I must say that I really find it rather amusing that this should be the first words to describe someone. I would hate to be so known for a sexual act that it defined me. “Oh aye I know Rab she likes masturbating then crying herself to sleep.” No thanks. Anyway I immediately tell my friend this because it’s a hilarious piece of info and we henceforth go on to then affectionately nickname the guy Bible John and that his what he is referred to as, even to this day and probable eternity. “Rab you and this guy fascinates me. 50 shades of Bae. A want screenshots of this weirdo you’ve been texting” Admittedly in the initial days of this fleeting romance i’m pretty uninterested. I am at a strange point in life during the summer where I am on a voyage of self discovery and don’t really think I’m ready to be in a relationship again (another side note it’s winter now so form an orderly queue boys). “Creeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep, Rab, why did you give him you number?” My early findings are that this guy is a bit much. It’s all too fast too soon. I’m a bit of a slow burner these days. There’s no skipping off into the sunset after a few dates with me. It’s a well thought out process that involves a council of men and women. “You’re playing with fire… Mrs Hudson” Anyway we go on a date. I am hungover and about half an hour late. In fact lets just say Im actually still a bit drunk. I am definitely still drunk. “He will want you to dress up as Zelda or something and clap him like a dug” So I turn up late and drunk. This was my life in summer. It’s what’s affectionately referred to as a ‘kitchen floor reset’ I thoroughly recommend it. “Rab man I don’t think you should be telling me that… Who was it? Please tell me it was Bible John?” There’s some choice language I pick up. I gather this person doesn’t approve of what I call “Hooring and Touring”. That’s a process that works in tandem with the kitchen floor reset. Again I thoroughly recommend it. It’s character building. “Whit wiz mad Ian Huntley saying when you met him?“ Anyway that’s fine it’s not for everyone. It is for me & im completely unapologetic about it. It makes me no less faithful and much more seasoned. “I think he is a dick, you are just in heat atm. You’re having a Britney moment.” Don’t get me wrong I don’t go around introducing myself as a hoe. I’m not that. What I mean is that I don’t pretend that I’m just some poor gal who can’t find the right guy and is miserably searching the universe for someone who can accept my weirdness. Poor me, no. All I’m saying is sometimes you just want rattled and that is totally fine. Just go get rattled get it out your system. I am open and honest about it because that is who I am. “You gonny let him strangle you ya mad psycho. Don’t say you’re in his dungeon.” It is so so so so so so important to me that I do not allow myself to be quashed by another relationship. The worst thing you can do is succumb to someone who doesn’t believe in you and all that you are. It’s such a waste of the person that you’ve worked so hard to become. “Shut the actual fuck up. Why do you attract all the weirdos?” Unfortunately I find that a lot easier said than done. I’m all about reflection so I do always take responsibility for myself and my actions I very rarely point the finger at people. I’m more likely to look at my own failings and maybe what I could have done differently. That all said I am still just a lass and quite a sensitive lass so when someone is mean to me I do feel hurt. “Rab he is actually gonny kill you.” After a few more meetings It becomes pretty clear that we are not compatible for several reasons. He begins to say unkind things to me. They are not just mean but they are unfounded. Now an ordinary person would just walk away from a situation like that. Not me. It’s perplexing especially because, I believe, I am regarded amongst my friends as quite a strong woman but in situations like this I cave in on myself. “Rab why are you even texting that cunt back.” I am strong… I can have an argument. I can even win an argument. I am opinionated and I feel like sometimes people don’t speak up enough. So I make a point of speaking up when something isn’t right. I’m not scared to ruffle feathers in fact I have been known to enjoy it. “Who does he think he is, your husband/da?!” Inexplicably this character completely diminishes in a romantic scenario. I don’t know if that’s some sort of PTSD shit or if I am just a spineless cunt when it comes to walking away from something that isn’t right. “No fucking way man, no bother mate. Get him slung Rab.” So yeah he is mean. Really mean. I find myself apologising for being me. This is actually a little bit sad. It reminds me that I’ve not perhaps come as far as I thought I had from that previous relationship where I swore I wouldn’t find myself lost in a sea of fuckery again. But here I am - surfing! “AW MY FUCKING GOD. YOU NEED TO GET HIM TO FUCK.” I still try to fix the situation. I am a fixer. I can fix this. “That’s heavy reverse psychology Rab. Whoever you are with next needs to let you be you and I seriously don’t think he will.” My fixing fails. The whole thing fails. Because fixing it would mean not being me. I find some of the things said so hurtful that I even cry. Tragic. This is probably the first time I’ve ever felt a bit damaged. “Tell me you didn’t take that serious Rab, fuck sake man the guy is off his nut” I then find myself questioning all sorts of ridiculously stupid trivial things about my life and wondering if maybe he is right. “Tell Bible John to get to fuck. Canny handle the Rab. ” I have got an Achilles heel or so it seems. I felt so affected by some of the things he said even though 99.9% of it was utter pish. What’s even more remarkable is that I took it. “Right can we just get Bible John patched I am worried you’re taking his opinion on board an no being Rab and that’s no right” After the dust settles and it’s all said and done. I am in process of picking up the pieces and I meet two of my good friends. I begin to tell them the story of Bible John and I have a full scale mental breakdown in the pub. Sobbing into my prosseco. Also tragic but slightly funny. “Right naw - that’s it done. Done done done.” But it’s good. I am not crying over him. He is obviously an arsehole. I am crying because I am sad that I allowed myself to get involved with someone like that. I am crying because I thought that after everything I had been through previously I would be stronger. I am crying because that person embodies everything I want to avoid. I am crying in Wetherspoons. This must be rock bottom I think. “OOOOOOft what an absolute cunt! Don’t let him get to you mate. Look at you now, happy as fuck and shagging away” I am kind of glad this all happened. The psychoanalysis side of this story leads me to believe that I hadn’t fully dealt with the end of my last relationship and the circumstances surrounding it. There was no crying though there ought to have been. I was just so completely exhausted by it all that I didn’t really process all the shit that had happened while we were together. I just went on my merry way happy to be free. Bible John helped me remember that I am only human and that sometimes to move on in life you need to allow yourself to be vulnerable and let it all out. “He doesn’t deserve you.” Since the mental breakdown I am actual happy as fuck. So I thoroughly recommend doing that also. I almost immediately erase all trace of Bible John because I do not give a single fuck about him and life is great… Until… “AW GOD NAW RAB WHITS HAPPENED” I go out with my two friends that I cried in Wetherspoons with. I’m as gay as a daffodil and absolutely loving life back on the sesh. The following morning we are in our hotel and I am hungover af but otherwise perky. “Mate… Whit happened” I’m having a pee and pondering life. Something I believe a lot of people do on the toilet. It’s gid. “Omg…” I have this absolutely horrid feeling in my tummy. I have just had a coil fitted some few weeks earlier so I wonder if it ’s just having a wee dance up there in my womb. How annoying I was thinking. Stupid fucking woman parts. “Mate……. Whit the fuck” The pain intensifies to a odd unfamiliar feeling I have never felt before. Now I’m thinking whit the fuck am I about to give birth… GIVE BIRTH ON THE FUCKING TOILET “NAW RAB ….. NAW?!” A few moments pass. Something is definitely travelling through my baby tunnel at an alarming rate. Then something comes out and lands with a thud in the toilet. “………………….” In this moment… This real character defining moment. I am 100% convinced that I’m about to turn round and see a foetus. “Please tell me it wasn’t…. Was it?” I am pleading with myself “Please don’t have just squeezed a foetus out in a hotel bathroom hungover” I take my time considering my options here. Is this actually my life.

Why the cunt never bothered to tell me that that had happened I will never know or understand but that really was the icing on the fucking cake of a shitty experience. (Side note went to see the sexual health nurse and I’m sound. Think an STD would of pushed me over the cliff edge.)

“The film ‘Shame’ is about you.”

For comic relief I took a photo. If I ever write a book it shall be on the cover.

Fuck my life. Fuck Bible John. He still follows me on Instagram. Smh.

Goodbye forever.

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cam-berry · 6 years

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i basically live to stress you out so all 99 of those questions (:

This is not only stressful for me, but annoying to everyone else because it’ll be super long -_-

But here i go:

1: Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?

open, i have a sliding mirror closet that’s super shallow

2: Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel?

of course i do, do people not?

3: Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out?

i don’t sleep with sheet….

4: Have you ever stolen a street sign before?

no and i have no idea how one goes about stealing one either

5: Do you like to use post-it notes?

i use them to make origami but not for notes of any kind

6: Do you cut out coupons but then never use them?

yes

7: Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees?

bees probably

8: Do you have freckles?

sadly nope

9: Do you always smile for pictures?

yeah

10: What is your biggest pet peeve?

people commenting on the volume of someone/ my voicewhen talking

11: Do you ever count your steps when you walk?

yeah, but i lose count really fast most of the time

12: Have you ever peed in the woods?

nope

13: pooped in the woods?

nope again

14: Do you ever dance even if there’s no music playing?

yes

15: Do you chew your pens and pencils?

nope

16: How many people have you slept with this week?

i’m a big asexual virgin so none

17: What size is your bed?

full?

18: What is your Song of the week?

toxic by Britney Spears

19: Is it okay for guys to wear pink?

i don’t see why not

20: Do you still watch cartoons?

yes

21: Whats your least favorite movie?

Mother!, 10/10 would not recommend

22: Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some?

underneath the ever growing piles of laundry on my floor

23: If you’re a girl, bra size? If you’re a guy, pants size?

34 D/DD

24: What do you dip a chicken nugget in?

honey mustard or BBQ sauce

25: What is your favorite food?

Soup

26: What movies could you watch over and over and still love?

pretty much anything by Ghibli

27: Last person you kissed/kissed you?

a friend doing the pocky game

28: Were you ever a boy/girl scout?

girl scout and boy was it a waste of time

29: Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?

no i hate my body, and don’t enjoy being nude

30: When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?

last year but it was a speech for someone and she kept it

31: Can you change the oil on a car?

no but i wanna learn

32: Ever gotten a speeding ticket?

nope not yet!

33: Ever ran out of gas?

nope im diligent as fuck

34: Favorite kind of sandwich?

a club sandwich from Jersey Mikes

35: Best thing to eat for breakfast?

Waffles and fruit

36: What is your usual bedtime?

pick a time any time

37: Are you lazy?

sorta?

38: When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween?

i was the ghost of little red riding hood one year, and a pumpkin, and wonder woman

39: What is your Chinese astrological sign?

dragon

40: Are you horny?

sometimes…

41: Do you have any magazine subscriptions?

nope

42: Which are better legos or lincoln logs?

i love lincoln logs personally, but i never had access to legos

43: Are you stubborn?

depends on who you ask

44: Who is better…Leno or Letterman?

idk what this is…

45: Ever watch soap operas?

nope

46: Are you afraid of heights?

deathly

47: Do you sing in the car?

when its late and im trying not to fall asleep at the wheel

48: Do you sing in the shower?

nope

49: Do you dance in the car?

nope

50: Ever used a gun?

yep

51: Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?

senior pictures

52: Do you think musicals are cheesy?

a little, and depending on the musical

53: Is Christmas stressful?

terribly

54: Ever eat a pierogi?

i dont think so

55: Favorite type of fruit pie?

key lime pie

56: Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?

professional volleyball player, then doctor, then mortician

57: Do you believe in ghosts?

58: Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?

yep

59: Take a vitamin daily?

nope

60: Wear slippers?

sometimes

61: Wear a bath robe?

yep

62: What do you wear to bed?

shorts and a hoodie or an old middle school class shirt

63: First concert?

Pvris (i dont like the band, i went for a friend)

64: Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?

walmart for most things but target for clothes

65: Nike or Adidas?

nike

66: Cheetos Or Fritos?

cheetos

67: Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?

peanuts would kill me so sunflower seeds it is!

68: Ever hear of the group Tres Bien?

nope

69: Ever take dance lessons?

nope, and im a horrible dancer

70: Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?

nope

71: Can you curl your tongue?

yep

72: Ever won a spelling bee?

always lost really quickly

73: Have you ever cried because you were so happy?

yep

74: Own any record albums?

nope

75: Own a record player?

nope

76: Regularly burn incense?

nope

77: Ever been in love?

nope

78: Who would you like to see in concert?

beartooth

79: What was the last concert you saw?

Pvris (the only concert i’ve been too)

80: Hot tea or cold tea?

hot tea when sick, cold tea any other time

81: Tea or coffee?

either or

82: Sugar or snickerdoodles?

sugar

83: Can you swim well?

well enough

84: Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?

yep

85: Are you patient?

for the most part

86: DJ or band, at a wedding?

i have no idea, i’ve never been to a wedding

87: Ever won a contest?

yes but i cant remember what it was. i was about 5

88: Ever have plastic surgery?

nope, but i want top surgery

89: Which are better black or green olives?

black

90: Can you knit or crochet?

heck yeah, i love making blankets

91: Best room for a fireplace?

not anywhere in california

92: Do you want to get married?

no, but i want a partner just not binding because things change

93: Who was your HS crush?

a gorgeous friend of mine on my volleyball team, and this super cute girl that was in all of my classes sophomore year

94: Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way?

95: Do you have kids?

nope

96: Do you want kids?

i would want to adopt an older kid

97: Whats your favorite color?

im really into pastel yellow at the moment

98: Do you miss anyone right now?

nope not really

sorry for the long post!

#long post #long #asks

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survivingjapan · 7 years

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EPISODE 6 "If Britney Spears Can Get Through 2007 The Villains Can Get Through Tribal Again" -Brian

Hey Alex.... Sad thing is was that I was fighting for you probably the hardest for the longest (hence the Raven crying pic), but then not only does your pal Richie decide to be a lunatic at tribal, but you also were making it quite hard.... I defended you to multiple people, but I can't do anything substantial if A) I don't hear from Linus myself about his potential swing vote and B) You tried to make a deal with Kage to force rocks and not tell me I liked you more than most of these people, but I can't work with someone who makes an alliance and then tries to force it in danger by accepting a selfish proposal to try and save only yourself and not your allies. I think it was just the way the cookie crumbled that it ended up this way....:L gl on the outside, I might be joining u soon.

Where is Nic asking for confessionals when we need him? :P I'm really sad that Alex is gone, I wanted to work closely with he and Richie, so it sucks that he's not around but I'm hoping that Richie and I can work together before too long. Right now I just want to make jury and once I accomplish that I'll feel better!

What happens when you bring together the 13 most messy, paranoid, villains? Kyoaku? Kyaoku? Kayoaku? Koyaku? I have no clue how to spell out name. But anyway, you get us Also, one more thing FUCK RICHIE FUCK LINUS FUCK JONATHAN

We win again... woohoo. Not anything different, but the more important part of this round is that I couldn't figure out how finding the idol went, since I'm pretty inexperienced, and honestly would've never figured that out, so I asked Steffen for help, and he goes ahead and just punches in a magic word into a url, and he found the idol and is now choosing to not give it to me, after it being all me who found it for us. I am clearly trusting Steffen for now, but I know he is a VERY smart player, and I wouldn't be surprised if he fucked me over at the end of the day, but I get a strong feeling that he won't do it to me. I just don't think he would, and if he did, it'd probably be one of the shadiest moves that could be pulled, but I'm also not trying to use this thing y'know. It'd be killer if I found it, figured everything out, and Steffen just punched in the URL, and he needed it to save himself and I didn't need it at all. My only concern is if one of us is holding onto it, and then the other needs it played on them, then that's going to leave the person playing the idol VERY vulnerable, but that's something we're just going to have to roll with, and going back to my previous point, if we even need to use this thing, it's a sign of weakness, but also a great tool for us to have in our back pockets.

People are constantly criticizing my game but messy or not, when it comes down to it, my social game has saved me 3 times in a row now

crow and sarah can eat the entirety of my ass tbh GOD i hate being on a tribe with these people.... after the mess that was the rocks scenario crow came to me and was like "have you talked to alex he has a plan for an alliance" and i went to alex and said ".....crow and sarah didnt they just vote you out?" and he was like "they came to me my dude" so whatever i never trusted them because sarah was sketchy about the hinky vote against me at the rocks tribal... BUT i thought okay theres no reason for them to go thru all this trouble if they were just going to vote out me or alex like we're at the bottom no reason to string us along i guess we could come together vote out kage this one round and from there maybe a unified tribe would allow for more moves for me in the upcoming rounds.... but shortly before tribal brian comes to me and is like im voting out alex i dont want there to be a tie bc crow and sarah are voting alex so im like okay theyre votes are already in for alex and you cant change votes this wont cause IMMEDIATE consequences and im going to need alex still here to back me up for this so 15 minutes before tribal i start WW3 asdfjhasfk i call out sarah and crow for the alliance and for sarah blaming junior for the hinky vote against me blah blah more goes down i say more things alex says things they say things everythings a mess and im just trying to paint the image that those 2 are liars and expose them just in the off chance that someone believes me and has an ounce of doubt against them bc with alex leaving and those 2 lying about it i was alone on this tribe anyway with no real social connections so id be gone next tribal.....but of course we lost the duel immediately after alex was voted out and i went crazy so i dont really have the time to do damage control at this point now its just campaigning which is going to be.................difficult i already went to junior kage and tommy with some campaigning last night but idk im going to need a miracle or someone to realize that i'm an asset that can be used like anyone who saves me right now gains an ally that has no other connections besides them so im prime numbers material in arabia i played such an under the radar social game where even when i backstabbed people and voted everyone out (except ting ting RIP) and i still got them to vote for me in the end bc i formed relationships and remained a likable positive quiet game player.... in this game.... BITCH i'm JT the winner that should have just played once because they just blow up their game from being extra in the next go around

okay remember the last time i wrote a confessional i was in the mindset of i know i'm going down but i'm going to do everything in my power to stay? well fuck that i swear to god i'd rather be voted out than ever have to have another conversation with tommy again i have never met anyone who is more infuriating to speak to and i CANT DO IT I"D RATHER BE VOTED OUT ITS ENOUGH!!!!!!!!

On 9/6/17, at 6:28 PM, cat (japan host) wrote: > okay FIRST it all started when i woke up and had to live another day Honestly I'm Cat

Hey I haven't been here in a while because we literally haven't lost since Mist. Not that there haven't been any developments, because their have been! It's just that the villains suck booty. And they're losing their 5th person in a row tonight. I wasn't really pressed about any of the eliminations other then Jaiden. I wasn't sure if I would have been able to work with him, but I was able to get quite a bit of info out of him. And now my outlet for villain tea is kinda gone. And the fact that I was in Canada all last weekend didn't help me in finding a villain tea substitute. BUT with all of them dropping like flies, it's hard to tell who would be a good candidate :') Other than Jaiden, we saw Ashley go which is fine because she's from India and I want them dead. Alex S went too so that's a thing. I feel like I need to really start messaging some of these villains to gain a connection - whether we swap any time soon or not there's an inevitable merge that there's a chance I could be at. The problem is though, I don't wanna really talk to any of them asdfghjk. Tommy and Sarah sketch me out, Brian and I are not on good terms, and while Linus and Kage could be chaotic and spill shit, I don't wanna get caught up in their messes. That leaves Richie, Junior, and Jonathan. Which obviously one of these 8 is going tonight, so I won't start messaging until after the tribal. I'm still skeptical of a swap and I'm hoping one doesn't happen so I can utilize getting close to the villains that I want to before we ACTUALLY meet up with them. But as for tea on the hero side, there's an obvious conflict on who we would hypothetically take out if we go to tribal. With 12 of us, we need 7 so someone isn't Jaiden'd. The main argument is whether to go for a Malaysian or to just take out Steffen. The thing is, I've been getting really close to Johnny and I think he trusts me. And he wants to bring in Steffen for a strong Solomon 5. Now, I don't want that to last forever seeing as I want Steffen gone soon anyway. But I think we need him for one round. Because the Malaysia/India hybrid duo of Kendall and Alex is a major problem. And Drew is someone who is just a massive threat to begin with. But Isaac still just wants Steffen gone. And he doesn't think that we could take out someone like Kendall or effectively take out Alex with Pippa being close to him. HERE'S THE GAG THOUGH! I talked to Pippa for a little bit one on one today, and she is totally down with taking out Kendall or Alex. The thing is, they both seem a little bit checked out. Kendall has 2 strikes, and Alex has kinda died out since his audition. Which... I absolutely feel for them if they're dealing with real life struggle. But at the same time if they're not gonna be super invested and if one of them already has 2 strikes then I won't question voting them out. So if Isaac knows Pippa is down to come for one of them, then we have the Solomon 5 already. Then it comes down to the outliers of Dom, Trace, Ruthie, and Ashton. I know Pippa and Johnny both really like Dom separately. Isaac likes Trace. I personally like Ashton but dunno how long we could trust him because he seems like he could have a chaotic side to him. And then there's Ruthie who I just would prefer not to really work with long term because she's such a social threat, and if we swap or get to merge way down the line or whatever and Ruthie is there, I feel like she's someone villains would definitely flock to for a potential number because she's so social and kind. And I know girl can be a flipper. So this just comes down to who do we wanna take out, and getting enough people on the same page for my own agenda. Because at the end of the day this is to benefit MY agenda the most. Isaac wants out Steffen still, and I was already able to talk Pippa out of going for Drew first. If we could get a Malaysia/India person out, then Drew, then Steffen, that would be the most optimal. Will it happen? Probably not just because that's so specific. However, it is still at least an outline that I would like to ATTEMPT trying to follow.

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