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minjiarchive · 3 months

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distance apart | jiu x fem!reader

not requested but i'll work on requests after! also just to let everyone know there's gonna be a cliffhanger at the end but listen, i'm planning to make a pt2

warnings / smut, phone sex, kinda a long ass fic btw 😭

These last few weeks have been hard. They've been frustrating and honestly, you've been pent up this whole week. You haven't been able to give yourself a damn break and it frustrates you. But your mood suddenly softens when Minji calls you, her endearing contact filling your heart with relief. She always knows what to say when you have a bad day, her soft voice bringing you at peace.

This call though... just seemed like she wanted to bring you to a different mood.

“Aww, you've missed me haven't you?” She asks although she doesn't need an answer for that because she knows you do.

“I have... I want to see you already,” Minji can imagine you pouting through the screen and she can't help but smile at the thought.

“Such an impatient girl,” she teases, your face getting flustered at the way she describes you, “you've been more needy since the last time I saw you.”

You'd joke that she's been spying on you since your business trip started because she's right. It's not easy not having her by your side or there to give you the proper comfort. You could survive a few more days without her, you needed to be alive to see her anyway.

“That's because I don't have your hands on me 24/7.”

There's a hum from her and then a long pause. The silence fills both ends with tension and you weren't sure if it was good or bad tension. Maybe that was too bold to say? Fuck, I shouldn't have said that in the first place. You felt awkward now, your thoughts making you feel even more embarrassed.

The prolonged silence was too much to bare so you broke the tension by groaning out, “I'm sorry, I just-”

“Have you been a good girl for me?”

She cuts you off before you can even apologize, her voice low and husky through the phone. You're suddenly met with heat that travels throughout your body, making your lower center warm and throbbing.

It's a question that catches you so off guard that you don't even know how to process it.

“What?”

'What' is all you can say because you're still trying to wrap your head around what just happened. From an embarrassingly long silence to asking you such a bold question had you questioning everything.

“Cat got your tongue, baby?” Minji chuckles but in a way that she's mocking you.

Your hands grip the sheets and you don't know why but you assume that her condescending tone is so fucking hot that you're left speechless.

In which you are.

“Answer me.”

You're so dumbfounded that you forgot that this all isn't happening through text, where you could easily just leave her on read and hope for the best. It's all happening in real-time.

“I-I've been good, Minji,” you whisper.

“You haven't been touching yourself without my permission, have you?” Minji wonders if you've made it this far without cumming. It's all decided by you though, whether she treats you like a slut or her good girl.

“N-No, I haven't.”

She's shocked but happy, the plan she set up for you is all going well.

“That's my girl,” she praises, making you melt so easily.

“It sounds like you deserve a reward for it then.”

Your eyes lit up at the sound of that, you might finally receive the release you've been wanting all this time. That is if you stay truthful and good to her but that isn't something you have to worry about.

“Did you see the toy I brought along in your suitcase?”

Another one of Minji's questions that has your head spinning with another 'What?' You had two suitcases, one with your essentials and another with all your clothes. You focused more on the suitcase with your clothes so you must've not realized that she put something in your luggage.

You have another one of your moments and decide to check your suitcase, and you were right. It was covered under everything else you packed, a dildo. It had to be one of your favorites that she used on you and you almost drooled on the spot when you saw it.

“Oh my god...” you say, clearly struck at the fact that she packed a toy for you.

“You're so cute. I put it with your luggage because I've been thinking about doing this with you.” You swore that if you stood up, your panties would be soaked. Instead, you just freeze and let her continue herself.

“I want you to put it inside while you're on the phone with me, I'll even let you ride it if you earn it.”

You're fucked.

You rush to the bed again and press your thighs tighter. You've been at a lost for words ever since she asked if you've been good for her, which happened 10 minutes ago.

“Hm? Would you like that, sweetheart?” Minji asks and you almost immediately reply with, “Yes please.”

You're obedient, almost too obedient that you'd allow Minji to do anything to you, but that's what she loves about you and she could never take it for granted.

Since you happily obliged, she smiles and says, “Good, put it inside of you then.”

“Start slow, don't put it in all the way yet,” making sure that the boundary is clear that you don't take it in all the way yet.

“Shit...”

“Does it feel good, love?”

She hears the single curse word and confirms that you're enjoying yourself but you add on,

“You feel so good, I've been needing this since I left.”

Minji herself felt her clit grinding against the friction of her pants, hungrily searching for some type of relief. You hear her breathing pick up from the other side of the phone and you take that to your advantage to think about how she'd sound like if she saw you like this.

Her arms holding one of your thighs to the side, digging her nails that would leave marks until the next day.

“My poor baby,” Minji cooed and your legs started spreading wider for her, “helplessly thinking about my strap buried inside of her, isn't that right?”

“Go deeper,” she growls.

“Oh god, please.” Your entire body shudders as you try to take it deeper. You've been so stressed out from work that your muscles have been more tense lately, Minji's been expecting it.

A stretch from your favorite toy would loosen you up, wouldn't it, princess?

You mumble to her how tight you are and how you can't take it – but she doesn't care really. She knows that she can treat you however she wants and not care how much you can take until you say the safe word so she's safe to continue.

The toy fills you up so much that you feel full but you're too greedy to stop. Your slick dripping down the length from how wet you are and it creates a mess underneath you. You speed up your pace and take it faster, hearing all the filthy sounds it makes as you pound yourself with the thought of Minji in your head.

“Tell me what I'd do if I was there with you.”

Minji could practically imagine and tell you what you're thinking of, she is the leader of her group at the end of the day. But her instincts leave her guessing, you must be thinking about a lot of things if she hears you this wet through the call. She takes in the pleasure of making you shy and hot in the face, knowing the result will always be you begging her to cum.

“You would force it all the way inside of me,” you manage out, “t-telling me that I'm your good girl while fuck-”

The mental images that mixed in with arousal made it nearly impossible to finish your sentence. You found yourself stuttering word after word and you weren't even sure if Minji understood what you said before that. It proved the easy access she had over you, so good to please and fuck.

You were both too deep to stop now so she encourages, “C'mon... Y/N, I know you can tell me.”

“While you shove your fingers in my mouth to keep me quiet,“ your own words having you rolling your hips harder into the toy.

“I'm so proud of you.”

Her praise never failed to boost your confidence and she can feel it through the screen, miles apart and her senses are still with you. Minji remembers it all so well. Bending you over while her fingers enter your mouth with ease, pulling them out all coated with your spit that she'll use to fill inside of you.

The memory sticks with her so well, she must remind you, “I'd have you choking around me so much, yet you're all alone in your hotel room...”

#i edged again #i'm so sorry #dreamcatcher scenarios #dreamcatcher imagines #dreamcatcher x reader #dreamcatcher smut #dreamcatcher #jiu scenarios #jiu imagines #jiu smut #jiu x reader #wlw #wlw smut #kpop smut

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raz-writes-the-thing · 6 months

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loved the period request you did for Alec!

My period has been really debilitating recently and I'm 99.9% sure that a period fic with Crowley is the only thing that will make me feel better

Hiya gorgeous,

Here's some HCs because I've not got fic inspo for this one yet

Crowley x GN!Reader

GOMENS: @coffee-and-red-lipstick @quickslvxrr @clarina04 @motionlessindoubt @stevekempscocktails @go-bonkers-go-foolish @peytonpenguin37 (send an ask to be added to a tag list!)

Crowley has a keen sense of smell, and even if you're not keeping a cycle calendar going, he can smell when your hormones are starting to go all crazy with an oncoming menstrual cycle.

Even though he'd love to, he doesn't want to use too many miracles to ease your cramps, so he prepares little nests for you to cuddle up in.

He preps snacks and blankets and because using miracles for heat and cooling an item are so small they're basically undetectable, he heats up heat packs for you whenever you ask.

When they're really back he rubs your lower spine and does his best to ease your muscles.

He's also always more than willing to fuck or finger the cramps out of you. He's aware that orgasms can ease cramps and is never one to shy away from something that might help you feel better. He's not a squeamish person, anyway.

"Mm- right- I heard you humans are fans of chocolate during these trying times. This true?"

Him getting you so many chocolates. All the chocolates and all the brands.

He also likes to run baths for you and give you massages if you can stand to be touched that much.

He will also give you all the cuddles. He's not a super cuddly person generally speaking, but he will do his best for you when he can. Particularly if you're in pain.

He even tried reading to you once when it was really, really bad. And he hates books. He can't read very well but he did his best for you. It did distract you, which was consolation enough. But he hasn't done it again since.

He has miracled the cramps before, but only when it's super bad and he doesn't have any other choice. He can't stand to see you in so much pain.

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ghouljams · 2 months

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As another fellow ace person, your take kn a/b/o feels so nice. Of course, i indulge in the dark traditional a/b/o fics, but it feels so nice to be recognized. I've noticed that in a few fics, the alpha leaves their beta partner for the rare omega, which is just sad. If anything, I feel like being an ace omega leaning type would be just me when I have a bad endometriosis episode. Crying, eating lots of food, and reading a metric ton of fanfiction.

I always hated that in fics. The fetishization of omegas always rubbed me the wrong way. (you all know my thoughts on the rare thing I'm not gonna reiterate them) Also the fact that alpha/omega always seemed to be the "right" pairing, the "natural" pairing when in reality with 3 extra genders to keep track of there's probably been every sort of combination of lovers. It should be no less common to see alphas or omegas with betas than with each other, people fall in love with who they fall in love with.

Unrelated but being an omega is hard! Everyone expects you to be the emotional support of the pack and make decisions, but sometimes you get tired of all that and just want to lay down in a dark room with a comfort flick. Sure you're initiating feelings talks and conversations with people, but you don't always know how to follow through with the "resolving" conflict part, and then you just end up with a bigger mess. Of course worst case you're like me and you can't help sticking your nose into other people's conversations to offer opinions because they said one of your special interest trigger words and now you have to correct some wrong opinions.

Then there's the whole territorial thing and not liking people in your space, not liking people touching your stuff or the members of your pack. You really got it rough with having a hard heat right after all that. I hope that doctors are better about endometriosis and terrible heat/rut cycles in the ghoul-omegaverse au just because everyone has to deal with them. But I'm not a doctor so i don't know, find a friend to make sure you're eating and taking pain killers in between the fanfic and crying.

#ghoul speaks #a/b/o #omegaverse

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rocknroll7575 · 19 days

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Team ARCZ is... Crazy (Pt.3)

Part 1/Part 2/Part 4

XXX

"It was here that Cardin knew he was in trouble..."

Cardin's eyes widened as he saw Yang's Semblance activate before him, and he could still feel the heat that burst from her and he was in awe by her glowing fiery hair and her now red eyes.

However, Cardin knew that he was in deep trouble by now, since Yang had said that her Semblance was similar to his own.

Yang glared at him, and in an instant, appeared right in front of him, delivering a powerful blow to his gut that the force instantly caused all the air to leave his body as well as caused some internal bleeding and cracked ribs.

It sent him flying back and skipping across the arena like a stone on water. Once he stopped and landed, Cardin spat up some blood and slowly got up on all fours.

'Shit! She r-really packs a fucking punch!' Cardin thought.

"It was here that Cardin's luck seemed to run out..."

He quickly tried to heal whatever was wrong with his internal wounds but knew that wasn't going to help as he could feel he didn't have much of his aura left, but that was also good news as he knew that after using her Semblance, Yang herself didn't have much either.

Cardin got up as blood dripped down his mouth and yet he had a smile on his face. he looked up at the monitor only to see that while his Aura was at 35%, Yang's was 40%, which meant, he had a chance, even if it was slim.

'I've got a chance!' Cardin thought joyfully. 'I just got to keep pushing it! No stopping! Jaune didn't! Reese didn't! I sure as hell ain't!' Cardin thought.

"...But he can't end on a loss,"

Cardin activated his semblance and set his strength, stamina, into overdrive, and rushed forward, pulling is mace back. Yang saw this incoming and pulled her left fist back, and the two blows clashed, causing a shockwave from the sheer force of the blows.

Yang was confused, 'How is he still so strong?' Yang asked herself.

However, as she was in her own head, she failed to notice Cardin's other hand coming in for a punch, which he landed right right in her face, causing her to stumbled to her left, and Cardin didn't let up as he grabbed his mace with both hands, pulled it back, and swung it right at Yang's end, uppercutting the blonde boxer, and causing her to fly up a little.

'This is crazy! He's still got this much strength!?' Yang cried.

Yang managed to land on her feet, but quickly jumped away, gaining some distance between her and Cardin. When she was far enough, she slammed her foot into the ground, kicking up part of the floor, that flew up in the air, and she pulled her fist back before punching it toward Cardin, which sent it flying dangerously at Cardin.

However, the young man pulled his mace back and struck the piece of flooring like a batter with a ball, sending it back towards Yang, but she moved her head to the side, evading the attack.

Cardin looked at her with a grin before he felt his arms feel severely sore and blood drip from his nose. He staggered forward and felt pain shoot all around his body.

'Damn it! I'm overdoing it! Shit!' He thought with anger. 'At this rate, I won't be able to win!'

Yang saw this and took this moment to blast forward, to end the fight with a single it, knowing she could if she powered enough of her aura and semblance into this next attack.

Not a mere foot away from the mace-wielding teen, she pulled her fist back, but Cardin managed to come out of his thoughts in the nick of time, to see Yang's attack and quickly bent backward just as she threw the punch, narrowly avoiding the blow.

Taking a page out of Jaune's book, he shot his head forward and slammed it right in Yang's face, stunning her and causing her to stagger back.

Cardin then once again, put his entire body into overdrive, and he quickly hit Yang in the face with a quick swipe of his Mace, before he spat more blood out and some more spilled from his eyes.

Yang was shocked by the blood, but that didn't stop Cardin as he went in for another hit, Yang ducked under it, and punched him in the gut again.

The pain in Cardin's stomach doubled, and his mouth filled with blood, but he didn't let it out until he looked at Yanb and spat it out in her face, blinding her.

"AH!" Yang cried as the blood struck her eyes.

Cardin gripped his mace with both hands again, raised his mace up, and struck the brawler over her head, sending her to the ground.

However, that was the straw that broke the camel's back as his entire body finally couldn't handle all the strain Cardin put on it, due to his semblance.

Cardin's eyes rolled into his head and he fell forward unconscious, and as he fell unconscious, Yang slowly got up to her knees and looked up to the ceiling with a smile before she looked back down at him with a wide grin.

"Damn Winchester! You've got some balls on you!" Yang cried with a joyful tone. Yang then looked at the monitor to see that both of their Auras were in the red and seemed to be only one digit apart, with her being at 20% and Cardin being at 19%. "Heh! Ya almost won, but a win's a win!" She said.

However, Yang didn't get up, she just fell onto her back with a smile.

"Cardin may have lost the fight, but he has gained the respect of many others around him, including the Summer Rose herself,"

As Cardin was being carried out by the nurses, Jaune, Reese, and May followed him, praising him as they headed toward the infirmary.

#rwby #rwby meme #rwby guardian ghost au #cardin winchester #yang xiao long #rwby yang xiao long #team arcz #team pays

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soaps-mohawk · 3 months

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Howdy!

I've a silly question, but I thought it'd be fun to ask anyway. How likely is jealousy in packs? Say, for example, you've got an alpha that insists on being the only alpha in the pack. They may have a few betas too, but no other alphas. What if that alpha had four omegas that they're responsible for and bonded to. Would that create issues? The bond between alphas and omegas is fulfilling in a different way than alphas and betas, or betas and omegas, right? So could there be tension between the omegas if they aren't getting adequate time with their alpha?

I'm kinda imagining the Sister Wives dynamic where the alpha clearly has a favorite, and there's a bunch of tension until the others get fed up and leave. But omegas don't have that option, so would they just have to put up with it?

Also, what would happen if they all went into heat at the same time? Sounds like a disaster to be honest. Are there regulations in place to prevent alphas from taking on too many omegas in their pack?

Ooh yeah, this is a good question.

So I think I mentioned briefly in another answer to a different question that there could be more omegas in a pack than alphas. It's very rare that that happens, for a lot of reasons.

Most (decent) institutes won't allow an alpha to have that kind of imbalance. Even omegas that don't go to institutes, who search for alphas the organic way, usually wouldn't choose to put themselves in that position.

Because...yes, it can cause a whole host of issues. The alpha would have a hard time splitting time and attention between just two omegas, much less four or even more, and as we've seen hints of, omegas can get needy if they're not getting their needs fulfilled and they can get nasty because of that. Jealousy absolutely would be an issue because the alpha would be drawn to one over the others (hence the need for a balance in numbers). An unbalanced dynamic would cause all sorts of issues for the omegas physically and mentally. Especially, like you brought up, if their heats by chance synced. You'd have (in this example) three omegas in heat with no help. So the alpha would have to prepare for that and we'll see later in the fic why that can be hard on the omegas.

It would be a disaster all around, which is why it's so uncommon. Alphas probably still try to do it, just out of some disgusting fantasy or perhaps greed, but it never ends well. Rather morbid, but it likely ends in the death of at least one omega, and probably a lot of pack rejection (which can also lead to death). So yeah, super rare but it does happen.

#there's always going to be that one sick fuck #who doesn't care about anything but themself #rest assured it's very rare at the point in time this fic takes place #just morally most alphas know better #even the bad ones #answered #crcb lore

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brightgnosis · 5 months

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I spoke to my Husband about how badly I'm struggling trying to figure out what on Earth to do with next year's garden. He's pushing me to do all flowers- which is kind of what I've been wiggling back and forth on, personally; he said that's immediately where his brain went, too, when I expressed having issues deciding.

When I brought up the fact that I can't bring them indoors because Araris'd try to eat them, and I can't handle the heat outdoors, so it felt like there was no real point- not since I'd never be able to enjoy them ... He started looking at ways to help cool the garden down for me; ever the eternal "Fixer", that man, I swear. But he did actually manage to find a couple options!

The two main options include (1) A small, battery operated misting fan I can just fill up and plop on one of the tables; and (2) Installing an 8ft Sun Shade on the garage. Something I can just pull over to the fence in order to provide extra shade when the Umbrella actually stops being useful after midday near entirely (which is always around roughly midsummer).

I don't know why I didn't think to find options to cool the garden down for myself. The thought just ... Never even remotely crossed my mind in any capacity. But between those two things, it should hopefully actually allow me to continue using and enjoying the garden through Summer. And so now it's not really all that unreasonable to try and do a flower garden next year after all!

I've kind of already picked out a rough idea of seeds and split the garden into three groups, now, then: The Garage bed, the Fence bed, and the pots.

➽ For the Garage bed, because it's so sunny, I'm going to plant largely natives that can handle the heat well (Coreopsis, Indian Blanket, Echinacea, Cardinal Flower, Yarrow, Queen Anne's Lace, Milkweed, Goldenrod, Sunflower, Passionflower, etc).

I already have half of the seeds for this since I ordered some of them last year and the starts just failed. So I won't have to order many more. Maybe only half of them, likely.

➽ For the Fence bed, since it's largely shaded, I'm going to plant more traditional ornamental garden flowers that probably can't handle our heat and our direct sun so well (Poppy, Lupine, Zinnia, Carnation, Cosmos, Calendula, Foxglove, etc).

I don't have any of these seeds in stock except for Lupine, because I haven't done an Ornamental plot since I started seed collecting. So I'll have to order all of these ones.

➽ And for the Pots, I'm just going to do some various mixed stuff; fill the larger ones in with what I've already planned to hold-over or re-plant from last year- and then save the smaller pots for the random things I find throughout the year at the Herb Festival and Lowe's ... Let everything just kind of fall as it may with the Pots.

I'm definitely still going to keep my normal staple Herbs like Rosemary, Basil, and Sage. Then I'm also going to do the new Plant Allies and other things I've already chosen for next year- like Rue, Absinthe Wormwood, Hyssop, and Mugwort, and then the new Rose I've already pre-ordered (which should be arriving in May, I think? I can't actually remember now). Plus I've got the potted Perennials that're still going strong- like the Comfrey, two Peonies, Blueberry, Lilac, and Perennial Salvia / Woodland Sage. And my Husband and I always grow Tomatoes every year, too, and won't be changing that (we've already picked those out.

I'm not going to re-order my Lily Bulbs this year. There's just too many of them to re-order, and doing so would wind up with far more bulbs than I could ever actually have the space for (I wish I could just order packs of like 5 bulbs or less, but everywhere sells like 10+ 😩); I think I'll just wait to re-order all of my Birthday Lilies I lost until we're actually out at the Farm and I can put them straight in the ground instead of risking loosing them in the pots again.

But not re-ordering them does mean I now have an extra 2 pots I can fiddle with if I can find space for them over by my garden instead of in the Breeze Way.

«Oklahoma - Region 2» ⬩ «Grow Zone 7a» ⬩ «Heat Zone 8»

#Personal #2023 #My Garden #Garden 2024 #Gardening #Oklahoma #Green Witch #Green Witchcraft #Witchy Gardening #Verderer #Witches Garden #Witch's Garden #Gardenblr #Plantblr #Gardeners On Tumblr #GardenBlog #Disabled Gardener

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starseneyes · 8 months

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New York, New York - A Union Town

This weekend, I went on a whirlwind adventure up to New York from Virginia on Sunday and back down on Monday. Why? I went to walk the picket line with my Union.

Why go through 8 excruciating hours of driving up, one brief night of sleep, 4 hours walking 10 miles, and another 8 painful hours driving back in less than 40 hours? I'm glad you asked.

I joined SAG-AFTRA in 2001. I started acting as a kid, but it was then that I had the opportunity to join, at age 17.

It was just AFTRA back then, which is why I still have never had a SAG card. Maybe after I catch up on my dues, I can solicit one, but I'm two years behind due to Pandemic and *waves hands* all this. Those who read this blog often know life's hit us with problem after problem, but we soldier on.

So, why the hell waste money going to New York? Well, first of all, I didn't. I told my husband that I felt like I needed to be there during the first day of negotiations. See, yesterday AMPTP finally met with the NegCom to negotiate a new contract.

The old contract is antiquated, leaves us vulnerable to AI, and has made it almost impossible to make a living as an actor in the current landscape. There was a time voice-acting was a third of my income. Those days are long gone.

It's important to have as many people on the line as possible during negotiations to send a clear message—we're here, and we aren't going anywhere until you give us fair contracts.

I originally was going to bum a night in a sleeping bag on a friend's cat-filled house while freezing because they don't believe in turning on the heat at night. I'm allergic to cats. Still, the idea was the only one I had.

Then, a client of mine (I'm a Digital Marketer by trade because writing and acting don't exactly pay the bills) said she wanted to cover my room.

We should note that I know writers don't need actors to write. I meant that they needed actors for the Fall Season, and I was having trouble thinking and typing through my tears. Anyway...

That settled, a Twitter friend I've never met in real life reached out offering gas money. I was so thankful, cried again, then quickly packed on a Saturday night for a Sunday morning departure.

I drove up with one stop to relieve my bladder, grab a kids meal (keeping down costs) and gas up.

I tried to sleep Sunday night, but I'm rubbish at going to bed early. I am good at getting up, early, and was ready for the lines. I put on my WGA East hat a WGA member handed me when I walked the lines back in July. I think they thought I was going to die of heat exhaustion, I was so red.

Instead of politely explaining that I don't temperature regulate and only sweat after I'm already in danger of heat stroke, I said, "Thank you".

I brought it with me this time in case Netflix was a sunny location. Spoiler alert: It wasn't. I didn't need the hat, and I didn't mind one bit.

Also to note: It's not that I was rich in July. No, a dear friend who passed (see blog on Cheryl Anne Marek) gifted us with a little money and said she knew we'd find something good to do with it. We rented a lake house in New Jersey for a vacation with the kids (though I brought my work and worked every day) and I took the train in one day to walk the WGA line.

I lamented that a heat wave shut down the rest of the week's picketing back in July, and always wanted to get back. So, I was ready for walking yesterday!

I was nearly a half hour early, and remarked that my mother's an IATSE 798 Journeyman makeup artist and I'm very used to being there before actors. I received a polite nod and asked if I could help at all. No, they said, they had a system.

So, I took this picture which strangely got the most attention on Twitter. But, it was a call to action—"I'm here and signed in! Where are you?"

"On our way", came the response. And people came. Our initial group of 20 or so became well over a hundred in under an hour. They kept expanding our walk way, and we marched, sang, and chanted along to the beat of our five percussionists. Yes, people with drums. Actors do not hold back when we're asked to go all-out. We go all-out!

Shortly after we got started walking in our tight, little circle, a friend of mine found me. Well, Peter and I have been Zoom and Twitter friends for ages, but we finally met. And when we hugged it was like old friends who hadn't seen one another in a few years. Fairly accurate, really.

We're both Pre-WGA—an often polarizing term that simply means we'd like to be WGA someday and are puttering along with spec scripts and screenwriting competitions until our dreams turn real. Being the realist I am, I know my odds are next to null, but the optimistic corner of my brain says not to surrender hope. So, I don't.

We stepped out of line for a quick photo, then back in to dance, chant, chat, and make noise. And while Picket Lines might look like a lot of fun from the outside, I was in a mad amount of pain.

See, I have a lot going on medically. Chronic pain is an old friend. And smiling through it, second nature.

So, if you saw me singing and swinging my hips, that wasn't just the beat. That was me trying to keep everything from locking up and telling myself I could make it just a little longer without a sip of water. And, yes, they handed us waters. I never say no to a proffered (sealed) bottle of water.

Because Picket Lines aren't just about the dancing, singing, chanting, and chatting. So many people out there are exhausted. But Actors are really good at finding our way through lean times, and Writers are, too, dagnabbit. Several WGA folks were out on the line with us, and they're standing alongside us as we stood alongside them.

Solidarity matters. We stand together, and it's not just Writers and Actors. I've seen IATSE on the lines. I've seen Teamsters on the lines. I've seen vacationers who decided to skip seeing the Empire State Building and come march with us instead. I've met film students (and history students) out on the lines who said they knew this mattered and they had to be a part of it.

I drove 8 hours there. I know people who've driven far more.

We are Actors. Writers. PAs. Teamsters. Makeup Artists. Hair Artists. Grips. Electricians. Craft Services. Camera Operators. Directors of Photography. Costumers. Best Boys. Boom Mic Operators. Editors. And more.

We—not those few billionaire, decision-making CEOs—create the bounty of beautiful films and television shows that illuminate people's lives. We are the dreamers of dreams.

Throughout the walk, I was struck by the care of the Captains. They made sure we knew where to walk and not. They brought out coffee (regular or black), bagels with cream cheese, cold waters, chips (or crisps, if you're across the pond), and more. These folks are volunteers who believe. We are all out there because we know this matters. But the sacrifice they make cannot be under-represented.

I got a new Strike shirt at the line, and decided to wear it on the drive home. It was far less smelly than the one I'd worn all day, and I was going to be trapped in a small tin can with me for hours, after all.

When I stopped at a service station, a random woman pointed at the shirt and told me she liked it. I smiled and thanked her. It always warms my heart when people see our fight and stand with us.

I drove home listening to the Good Omens audiobook (have about 41 minutes left, now) I borrowed via my local library (Please support yours. Libraries are amazing!). I was so bloody tired, but the voices of the actors filled my car and the story kept my mind awake. It's bloody brilliant if you've never read/listened.

It was after 9PM when I pulled up to my house. My three children (ages 9, 9, and 6) were still awake.

6yo: Mama, what did you do?! Me: Walked in circles for three hours. 6yo: Walked in circles?

While the twins have a fairly firm grasp on all this, she's six. I pulled her in my arms and hugged her close as I tried to explain a little better.

Because I believe in what we did. I am no influencer or celebrity. I'm simply a girl who believes in her Union. While I've been a Twitter warrior (one WGA guy I met said, "I think I've seen your tweets!"), I wanted to do more. I have been to a rally in Wilmington. I've walked the lines with WGA. But I wanted to walk the lines with my Union, too. It felt like the right thing to do.

My hips were killing me last night. And I admit I worried about my chronic pilonidal disease flaring up. But, I know what to do after a decade of living with it, and today I'm just fine.

Folks, WGA and SAG-AFTRA have been out here fighting for the rights of workers. We're all workers. That's what we are. Most actors and writers aren't famous or rich. We're simply people working our asses off doing what we love, and hoping to make enough to live. It's as simple as that.

I never wanted fame or fortune, even in my youth! I simply wanted to write and act and earn a living. Doesn't seem so strange, right?

Anyway, please do post your support for SAG-AFTRA, if you feel so inclined. If you can make it to a picket line, good on ya! If you can't, no worries. We all have different parameters to what we can and cannot do. And we're all in this together.

Here's to new contracts, a better future, and worker's rights. Onward.

#sag aftra #sag strike #sag aftra strike #screen actors guild #Picket line #sag aftra strong #strike solidarity #actors strike

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aching-tummies · 9 months

Note

As I walk in from another day of work I see you once again working when your supposed to be resting. Your doing dishes again making sure every single pot and pan is in place. I'm surprised there's any dirty dishes to do with how little you've been eating this last week. As I quietly walk into the kitchen I can tell your definitely still sick. Your tummy still looks visibly bloated even from where I stand. It's like a balloon that's slowly been getting bigger this last week despite how hard it's been to get you to eat anything. I also see your chicken soup sitting on the dinning table. It looks like you've barely had any! "Hey honey I'm home. What did I tell you about letting me do the housework while your sick?" You slowly turn to me and I can tell by the blush on your face your running a fever. You don't say much just "I'm fine" as your tummy let's out an audible groan. "Your belly thinks otherwise you must be hungry" I say as we both sit down at the table. You try and shake your head no but by then I've already got a spoon of soup in your mouth encouraging you to swallow. Slowly but surely I feed you the rest of the soup despite your protest. Just as we finish you let out a wet sounding belch and another moan. I help you stand and see how firm and bloated you belly is. Filled to bursting with soup and everything else it's refused to digest. "I think someone deserves some rubs for finishing all that soup" I wrap my arms around your tummy feeling the rock hard lump of your stomach. "Baby your hands are putting to much pressure on my tummy it doesn't feel good" but I keep rubbing anyway enjoying the groans you and your tummy are making a little to much.

The following is almost exactly how I imagine such a scenario would go in real-life. I'm not exaggerating how I felt when I was sick--my belly really did feel so insanely bloated that I was literally swallowing back sour liquid all day when I was sick. It didn't help that I was so congested and had such a sore throat that the thought of vomiting terrified me because it was a surefire way to suffocate. My bloated belly was taking up too much room and I couldn't get enough air so I was constantly short of breath...had a partner actually tried anything with my belly, I absolutely would have spewed and likely suffocated/drowned due to all that liquid flooding the one path I had left with which to breathe.

You walk in to our shared apartment an note that I'm at the dish-washer, carefully trying to place a stubborn pan with an awkward handle.

“Hey, honey. I'm home. What did I tell you about letting me do the housework while you're sick?”

Even with the obvious fever, it's clear that I'm glaring at you. I quickly grab the pen and notebook on the counter that's been my primary means of communicating since the sickness robbed me of my voice.

'The less you handle my used cups, the better.'

I quickly open the fridge and point out the packed lunch I've set aside in the usual spot for you. I then gesture at the slow-cooker with a singular portion within it on the keep-warm function on the kitchen counter.

“I'll eat now.” You inform me.

I nod and begin plating up your meal, ladling the curry over a portion of rice and setting the plate on the kitchen table. I move to remove the cooled bowl of chicken broth that I gave up trying to eat some time ago. My stomach grumbles angrily, sickly and bloated despite the fact that I have yet to eat anything today.

“Was that your stomach? Sit.” You call out.

I shake my head, but you're already tugging on my arm, dragging me to sit in one of the dining chairs. I set the cold soup back on the table to avoid spilling it. You quickly whisk it away, setting it in the microwave to reheat.

“ N-Not hungry.” I protest, my voice barely sounding beyond the congestion and sore-throat I'm speaking through. I palm at my belly, feeling no give beneath my palm.

“That's just the sickness talking. Appetite or not, you need to eat.” You mutter, coming back with the re-heated soup.

Before I can grab the spoon to feed myself, you've already taken it into your hand and are bringing a spoonful to my lips. I squirm away from it and pat at my tummy, hoping you'll get the message. I wince at the slight jostling to my bloated belly. My stomach is visibly distended and it feels completely full despite the fact that the soup is still in the bowl. I feel very water-logged, as though the soup is already in my belly despite it very clearly being in the bowl. My stomach grumbles angrily at the patting and I quickly stop, swallowing back against the sudden nausea.

I gesture to your dinner, ignored on the other end of the table.

“You first.” You say, leaning closer to continue spoon-feeding me the unwanted soup. “You must be hungry. It's dinner-time, babe. You made this for yourself at 1PM—you sent a picture. Same bowl and everything.” You had left a note, instructing me to text you when I got up and when I got around to eating. Had I not sent proof of being awake and eating, you would have gone out of your way to pick up something on the way home with which to feed to me.

I gag more than a couple of times before the bowl finally empties. Every breath comes with a wet little 'slap' lapping at the back of my throat as I swallow back against the hot liquid trying to escape my bloated tummy.

A short, sharp, and very wet sounding belch erupts from my belly, unbidden. I slap a hand over my mouth, willing myself not to be sick.

“Oh? Is your belly full?” You tease. I nod, one hand still clapped over my mouth and the other resting on the side of my distended belly as I feel the soup tickling at my throat. I feel like a thermometer in a children's science-class—with the liquid-y contents rising and falling rapidly, being manipulated by people that don't care to understand what's actually going on inside. I feel very much like an abused thermometer, like any second now something's going to crack and spew dangerous liquid absolutely everywhere.

“I think someone deserves some tummy rubs. You did so good, finishing all that soup.” You coo at me as you help me stand.

We slowly make our way to the couch. It's a short distance, but it takes us maybe four times as long as normal to reach it as I stumble, cradling my belly and doubling over every time I feel like I'm about to let everything out. 'Bloated' is an understatement for how ridiculously, painfully full my stomach feels. Imagine filling a glass of water to the absolute brim, liquid forming a meniscus just above the rim of the glass. That is basically how my belly feels in this moment—filled to the point of overflowing, with the liquid constantly threatening to spill over as we move across our apartment.

Your hand brushes across my belly and I hiss, moaning as my mouth floods with something hot and salty. You slide your hand over my belly, not really applying any pressure, but even that light touch is enough to disturb the delicate balance inside of me.

“B-Babe...nnngh...t-that really doesn't feel good on my—o-on my—ulp--on my tummy.” I murmur, stopping to swallow back some hot, sour liquid in the middle of my statement. “Ooooh...n-no rubs...p-please? Too much—urp---p-pressure.” I can't believe I'm refusing belly rubs...but I'm too full. My stomach is rock-solid beneath our palms even though it feels like it's full of liquid.

Even the idea of sitting down on the couch in front of us fills me with dread. Bending at the waist at all sounds like a very, very bad idea right now. My belly feels bloated enough to spontaneously rupture all on it's own and I really don't want to test the durability of my stomach. My own hand is barely skimming my clothed belly, careful to be there just to sort of guard my achingly full belly rather than actually touch it.

“Nonsense! There's nothing a little belly rub can't fix!” You exclaim, slapping me playfully on the back as you do so. The shockwave of the slap reverberates through my bloated belly and my mouth floods with hot soup even as you push your other hand incessantly on the achiest part of my belly as you apply what you believe is a sure-fire way to fix my digestive issues. Either way, my stomach has decided that it's done feeling so full-up. Something's going to give, and it's going to give very, very quickly.

#sick tummy #bloated belly #tummy kink #belly rubs #RP-scenario

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autisticrosewilson · 8 days

Note

Hi!! Thoughts on O4O JayGrant?? I've seen you going on about it and now I'm curious!!! Also, (politely shooks your shoulders) please write that jaygrant Selkie!Jason au!!

I am SO GLAD you asked!!!

I think they're both kind of repressed about their dynamic, Jason because it made him vulnerable and Grant because it meant he could never live up to Slade in his mind. Neither of them really trust alphas so they end up sharing heats with each other, which turns into casually nesting with each other, which turns into them living together, and suddenly Grant is a regular fixture in the East End because it's no longer just Jason's territory it's their territory.

And then, Tyler comes in. And Sasha. And Respawn. And Poppy. And-

There's a lot of street kids that need places to stay. I've talked before about Jason giving his safe houses to people who need them because I can't fathom the thought that he has a bazillion empty houses when there are so many people who need it. I think this is DOUBLY true in the Omegaverse because Jason sees everyone in the Alley, to some extent, as his pack.

Grant doesn't mean to start helping with this stuff, but before he knows it he sees Jason as his mate and now the Alley people are his pack too. He's got pups to feed, and crooks to discipline. He doesn't have time to run around fucking up his dad's jobs anymore.

Adeline is happy about this, if nothing else. She's been asking after grandpups practically since she found out Grant was alive, and she doesn't much care that none of them are related to her by blood.

If they ever DID want bio pups, well, there's perks to having Talia Head as a mother in law. Not that they need her tech, because apparently the pit and the serum has made it so apparently they can both give pups as well as get them. Which they find out,,,,,very shortly after they tie the proverbial knot.

It's going to be a rough nine months but Steph and Rose are willing to take over patrols and things for them!! And soon there will be at least two more little monsters born and bred to MENACES running around<333

#What's the omegaverse equivalent of a butch #idk but Jason and Grant are butch4butch and this is very important to me #The world of queer omegaverse is one oft left unexplored which is a CRIME #you're telling me people can trans their dynamics (bitching) but most people just use that for noncon force fem stuff #Someone ask me about my Flipped (trans dynamic) Joey thoughts #he's so Alpha to Beta coded #dc #omegaverse #jason todd #grant wilson dc #JayGrant #Also for the selkie thing it is currently being written 🫡#Ask #Mutual Mayhem

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photogirl894 · 2 years

Text

This is for @lizartgurl / @jedipoodoo , who mentioned wanting from someone a soft Hunter sick fic with him, Omega and a reader to help her feel better during a hard time right now!

I hope this helps, dear! 💜

"Worried Sick"

Pairing: Hunter x fem reader

"(Y/N), I think something's wrong with Omega!" cried Hunter, coming out of the Marauder to you outside.

You flipped around at hearing his concerned voice. "What is it, Hunter?"

"She's burning up and she's saying she's in pain. I think she's dying," he told you, his eyes wide with fear.

Now anxious yourself, the two of you ran back into the ship and to the rear gunner's mount where Omega's makeshift room was. Sure enough, she was sitting in the chair, groaning in pain and clutching her stomach. You went up to her and laid the back of your hand on her forehead and she was indeed hot and sweaty to the touch.

"Omega, honey, what's wrong?" you asked her.

"I...I feel really hot, my stomach and throat hurts and my whole body aches," she whined.

Hearing that, you knew exactly what was wrong with her and you chuckled to yourself.

"I don't see how any of this is amusing. Her life is in danger," Hunter chided you.

You responded with a grin, "She's not dying silly. She's just gotten sick."

"What?" he asked, confused.

You tilted your head. "Haven't you ever been sick before?" you inquired.

In reply, he said, "No, because of our enhanced abilities, we were engineered to never get sick or anything like that."

You snickered again. "Well, no wonder you were so freaked out," you commented aloud. "You don’t know about the signs of getting sick. Her heat is due to a fever; that and her aches and stomach pains points to some kind of flu virus. We can easily treat it." Then you turned back to Omega and knelt down beside her. "Don't worry, Omega, you're going to be fine. You've just gotten sick. We'll get you some medicine and we'll take care of you, okay?"

Omega replied weakly, "Okay."

A little while later, you and Hunter returned from the nearby city with the supplies you needed: medicine, ice packs and a carton of bone broth, which you put on a heater to warm up for her to eat. However, when you went back to Omega, you found she was shivering.

"Oh stars, she's got chills now," you stated upon seeing her. "Hunter, fetch her some blankets!"

The Sergeant quickly obeyed and went to another part of the ship while you prepared the medicine for the young girl.

When Hunter returned, he passed up the blankets to you and he watched down below the gunner's mount as you wrapped Omega tightly in a couple blankets and then said to her, "Now, love, I'm going to give you some medicine to help fight the virus. It's not going to taste the best, but I have some bone broth for you to eat to help get rid of the bad taste and to also help you feel better."

"(Y/N)...I'm scared," Hunter heard Omega admit meekly.

"Why are you scared?" you asked.

"I've never been sick before and I made Hunter worry. Am I going to be like this for a long time? Am I going to die?"

"Oh, sweetheart, no!" you replied. "This virus isn't going to kill you, especially once you take the medicine. It might take a bit, but you'll recover in no time. Hunter was worried, yes, but that's because he cares a lot about you and wants you to be okay. He doesn't know what it's like to be sick, so he wasn't sure how to react. That's why he came to me."

There was a small silence before Omega said back, "I'm glad he did. Thank you for taking care of me."

You brushed her hair from her forehead and responded softly, "Of course, Omega."

Hunter hadn't been able to keep his eyes off of you through this whole encounter and he watched as you lifted a small cup of green liquid up for Omega to take. The young girl drank the cup and immediately started gagging.

"You're okay, I know it tastes awful," you told her, rubbing her back and grabbing a bowl of the broth you'd brought up with the other. "Here, eat this. It'll get rid of the taste as well as warm you up, settle your stomach and soothe the pain in your throat."

Omega, while still huddled in the blankets, took the bowl and scooped up a spoonful of the bone broth into her mouth. Immediately, she released a satisfied moan and started slurping up more of the broth.

You ran your hand up and down her back. "You keep eating that and hopefully that'll help. The medicine is also going to make you drowsy soon, so by the time you're finished eating, you should get some rest. Sleep is the best thing to help fight off sickness."

Omega nodded and continued eating. Before long, she'd had her fill of the broth, gave the bowl back to you and her eyes started looking a bit heavy.

"Will you...will you stay with me until I fall asleep, (Y/N)?" she asked of you as she started curling up into the chair.

You pulled the blankets more tightly around her and answered, "I'm not going anywhere. Close your eyes, sweetheart, and let your worries just fade away. I'm here and I'll watch over you."

Hunter watched as you ran your hand through Omega's hair slowly and repeated the motion over and over as Omega drifted off to sleep. Even after a few minutes passed and he figured surely she'd gone to sleep by then, you stayed there, just stroking her head and smiling down at her like she was the most precious thing in the galaxy. Hunter felt his heart beat rapidly at watching you being so soft and motherly with Omega, the young Clone he'd grown so fond of and swore to protect. You were so good with her and he was grateful that she had a female figure in her life to help guide her and take care of her. He could tell she was special to you...just as you were special to him.

Soon, you stood up from the floor of the gunner's mount and climbed down the ladder that led back into the ship. You looked to Hunter a couple feet away as your feet touched the ground.

"Well, she should be starting her recovery," you told him. "She's taken the medicine, she has food in her system and now, she's resting, which is the best thing she needs right now. Everything's going to be all right."

"I'm sorry I overreacted before," he apologized. "I didn't know what to do."

You said back to him, "No, don't apologize. It's okay. I was happy to help. You didn't know and I can imagine it was scary for you to see her like that. I know you care about her."

"I do...and I can see you do, as well," he said, his face softening as he gazed at you.

Your heart began to race at seeing how he was looking at you and heat rose up in your cheeks.

He stepped forward and gently placed his hand underneath your chin, lightly tilting your head up to look at him. "I care about you, too, you know," he said quietly.

Just as you smiled up at him, he leaned down and ever so gently pressed his lips to yours in the sweetest, most loving kiss. The warmth that had been in your face from his previous words was now shooting through your entire being at the feeling of him kissing you in that moment and your hands came up to his armored chest.

Much too soon to your liking, Hunter pulled back, but kept his forehead pressed against yours as he then told you, "Thank you for taking care of Omega...and for easing my fears. I'm glad you're with us."

With a smile, you replied, "Of course. There's nowhere I'd rather be."

More Hunter fics

Bad Batch Writing Requests

#star wars the bad batch #the bad batch #bad batch hunter #hunter x reader

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ina11rarepair · 2 months

Note

Can I request some Froy x Asuto headcanons?

✨🌞 GiriMori / Froy Girikanan x Inamori Asuto

Froy would often tell Asuto stories about Shinjou Takuma when he was working for them or when he's outside of work and accompanying Froy's dad. He'd even ask his brother about Shinjou so that he could tell his boyfriend.

Asuto prefers to work hard to earn his own money but there are times where incomes were short which his boyfriend would help him with. Asuto always feels a little embarrassed accepting Froy's help and feels like he owes Froy big time for his aid (Froy would reassure him to not feel so).

They both love sharing each other countries' cuisines.

Asuto loves fairs a ton, so he always dragon froy along with him when there's one around.

Froy is the one who always wins gifts for Asuto (Asuto sucks at the games, especially the claw machine ^_^).

Froy cooks traditional russian food for Asuto every chance he gets, and Asuto loves it.

They visit each other's towns often and Froy surprisingly loves the heat of inakuni island.

He was scared to visit at first since he's not used to hot weather, so he packed at least 5 different fans.

Froy loves to borrow Asuto's clothes.

They both love cats and would like to adopt one in the future, but they have troubles deciding on the breed they want (Asuto wants a short haired cat meanwhile Froy prefers long haired breeds).

After Irina got arrested, Asuto helped Froy deal with everything since he knew how it felt to lose both parents. That included long walks, lots of gifts, meetups with friends and of course playing football.

They realized they had feelings for each other on one of their walks when they held hands and just spaced out thinking “omg".

It was Froy's first relationship, since he was not allowed to date before but Asuto reassured him and honestly he couldn't have hoped for a better first partner.

They both love lemonade, but Asuto loves to put different kinds of syrups in his glass (Froy tried it with strawberry syrup once but he hated it with a passion).

-🌲, 👛

A little note from admin (👛) here :P so recently I've been looking back at my work for this account, I noticed how rushed most of it was and how little love and care I put into those works. I think they were so half-made because of how busy I am with school since I have so many homework every single day and so little time to do your guys request. Most of the admins have very little time to finish the asks since they also have to focus on a bunch of tests and exams in order to graduate; not to mention some of us get sidetracked a lot on other stuff. Back to the topic, I just wanted to say that I'll put more life into the things I do. sorry for taking so long btw :[

#inazuma eleven #inazuma eleven ares #inazuma eleven ares no tenbin #inazuma eleven balance of ares #inazuma eleven scale of ares #inazuma eleven orion #inazuma eleven orion no kokuin #inazuma eleven the seal of orion #girimori #froy x asuto #asuto x froy #inamori asuto #froy girikanan #inazuma eleven headcanon #IE headcanon #inazuma eleven rarepair #admin 🌲#admin 👛

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amor1st03 · 2 years

Text

Doe Eyes and Dimples | Eddie Munson

Eddie Munson x fem!reader

best friend to (kinda)enemies to lovers

in which: after an argument 2 years prior you and your best friend, Eddie, had a massive argument and it takes the bizarre happenings of Hawkins for you two to reunite

A/N: Decided to change the narrative to second person and I'll probs continue doing it this way. But yeah anyway, hope you enjoy!

Freshman year was always going to be scary for you. You always knew it was going to be. Being new to Hawkins didn't help either. Most people had come to high school with their middle school friends but you had had to pack up and leave them all behind. You leaned your back against the lockers and let out a deep sigh as you watched students rush past her making their way to classes. You had been here for a week now and still hadn't worked up the courage to talk to anyone. The most interaction you had had with anyone was when a gross Sophomore had hit on you.

Eddie saw you leaning against his locker. He stood still for a moment, in a trance. He didn't believe in love at first but if it was real then this must have been what it felt like. Nervously, he approached you.

"Um, d-do you mind, I need to get to my locker."

"Oh, sorry." You quickly turned your head to look at the boy and pushed yourself away from the locker. He smiled softly at you. God, those eyes, you thought, and those dimples. He opened his locker and you noticed a Dungeons and Dragons poster.

"Hey, you play D&D?"

"Yeah, I love it," He answered, enthusiastically. "I was thinking about trying to set up a group for it."

"That's so cool."

"Would you like to join? Of course, you don't have to if-" He started to ramble a little.

"I'd love to." You cut him off.

"Great, do you wanna sit with me at lunch."

"I'd love to. I'm Y/N, by the way, Y/N Y/L/N."

"Well, it's nice to meet you Y/N, I'm Eddie Munson." You shook hands, smiling again at each other. Your gazes lingered a little too long at each other so you cleared your throat to break the awkwardness.

"I've got to get to class but I'll meet you at lunch. See you later."

"See you!" He called after you as you left.

When Eddie sat down at his lunch table alone he felt nervous that you wouldn't show. I mean you seemed so nice and pretty, you probably already had a ton of friends and wouldn't wanna be seen with a freak like him who had no friends. He had friends in middle school. Together they shared a band called Corroded Coffin but slowly they began to drop out saying that they didn't want to be seen as freaks when they got to high school. Two weeks before they started freshman year the last member dropped out leaving Corroded Coffin a one-man band. Not only did he need to find friends, but he also needed new band members.

When you entered the cafeteria you headed for the lunch line. Eddie watched, anxiously, as you paid for your food and turned. When your eyes met his and you smiled he felt relief wash over him. You headed in his direction, taking a seat across from him.

"Hi," You said.

"Hi," He replied.

"I'm really excited for this, the thought of it got me through math class, to be honest." Eddie felt heat rise up his neck and cheeks. He hoped you didn't notice the red tinge on his cheeks. She was excited to come and sit with me? He thought to himself. He knew you didn't mean it in that way but he liked to think that something about him made you want to be here and not just the game. "Is anyone else joining us?" Your voice broke him out of his thoughts. He suddenly felt very embarrassed. He hadn't been able to find anyone else.

"Sorry, I haven't found anyone yet. Truth is I don't really have any friends." He looked down at his food, not wanting to make eye contact. Other than the band, kids had thought he was a freak. He had always been a freak just because of his music and interest in fantasy games and now he was a loner too.

"Yeah, me neither. But that can change today if you like. I'll be your friend." His head shot up to look at the girl sitting in front of him.

"Yeah, I'd really like that."

"Alright then, from now on, Eddie Munson, you and I shall be friends."

And you were. You managed to find a few outcasts who didn't sit with anyone and brought them into the group. The two of you taught the game as best you could to the ones who had never played before. Eddie had been named the Dungeon Master for the first campaign the group ever played. It was small but you and Eddie felt good to have found a group. You felt even better to have found each other.

*** "Whatcha' listening to?" Eddie asked as he sat down at the table. You had been the first to arrive for lunch so you had pulled out your walkman. You handed him the headphones before continuing to eat your food.

You were now in senior year. The older members of your original group had left and gone to college but you had found new students to take under your wing. Over the years the two of you had become practically inseparable. So inseparable most people thought it was just a matter of time before you finally started dating. There had always been hope in Eddie's mind that one day he'd work up the courage to ask you out but he was certain that once he tried to make a move he wouldn't be about to stop himself from confessing his undying love for you that he's had since freshman year and scare you off. Nevertheless, Eddie held on tightly to this hope.

Y/oufelt the opposite. You had spent endless years pining over your best friend. It was obvious. Everyone knew how you felt, surely Eddie could see it. But you couldn't admit it to him. You knew it would ruin everything you had. He was your first friend in Hawkins and you were not about to lose that just because you had learned to love him as more than a friend. Hope was just too fragile for you to risk holding on. You wanted to at least try and let go.

That's why when Anthony asked you out on a date you accepted. You had to move on and Anthony was sweet and cute, you couldn't deny that. I could fall in love with him, you thought. But really you just wanted to fall out of love with your best friend.

"Is this Fleetwood Mac? Are you kidding me, Y/N?"

"It's good!" You shook your head at him as some of the other group members began to arrive at the table. They ignored the two of you harmlessly arguing.

"The other day you were listening to The Beatles in the car when I was with you, what are you some kind of hippie? (honestly lowkey me my dad tells me if I was alive in the 60s-80s I would have been a hippie lmaooo)" You rolled your eyes.

"Shut up. Besides I like Iron Maiden and Kiss and you listen to them."

"That's because they're good. Fleetwood Mac and The Beatles, seriously? So generic."

"I like The Beatles." One of the boys piped up but Eddie just turned and glared. The boy slumped down in his seat.

"What else do you listen to, Y/N?"

"Everything, Duran Duran, Prince, Cyndi Lauper." Eddie groaned. "Well, what about Queen? (I had to, they're my favourite lol) You've got to like Queen, everybody does."

"Fine, I'll admit I like some Queen songs and Brian May is one hell of a guitarist I have to agree. But other than that I'm disappointed, sweetheart." There it was. That nickname he had started using for you in Sophomore year. At first, Eddie had been a bundle of nerves. Hesitant about everything because everyone thought he was a freak right? But you didn't. And that helped him feel less insecure about himself. It didn't matter what other people thought. He was happy with who he was. Plus, you had always assured him you didn't think he was a freak. And he thought you were the sweetest person alive because of it. That's why he thought that was the best thing to call you.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." You laughed a little which earned you a smile from Eddie, dimples appearing. I'll never get over those doe eyes and dimples, you thought. You turned your attention away quickly. You were going on a date with a really nice guy and you weren't going to be in love with Eddie forever, you wouldn't allow it, not when it would result in nothing but heartbreak.

***

"Anthony?! Really, you know when you told me you had a boyfriend I did not expect it to be some jock." You had kept your relationship a secret for a while but the two of you had finally decided you wanted to make it public. You had grown to care for him. A part of you still belonged to Eddie, you had realised that your wish to fall totally out of love with him would never happen, he would always have a piece of your heart, but you were happy with Anthony. You had pulled Eddie into the room where you usually played DnD. You were going to tell the whole group but you had to do this one-to-one with Eddie.

"Look I know what you think about his type or whatever it is but he's not like that. He's so nice, you'd like him."

"I can't believe this. He's, like, everything our group is against. All parties and basketball games and popularity bullshit."

"No, he's everything you're against, Eddie." You raised your voice.

"We're outcasts, Y/N, we don't fit in with his crowd and we should keep it that way!"

"I can't believe you right now, I really like him, Eddie, why can't you just be happy for me?" Tears threatened to fall from your eyes as you felt a lump rise in your throat. Eddie wanted to be happy for you but it hurt so much to see you with someone that wasn't him. "He knows me and he knows I'm friends with you and he's never once said a nasty word against you."

"Yeah, maybe when you're around but you've seen the crowd he hangs around with."

"I can't believe you're being like this. You're the last person I expected to judge someone considering you're the one everyone thinks is a freak!" The second you said it you regretted it. Eddie could handle anyone else calling him a freak but not you. Not the girl he had spent years loving.

"Everyone..." His voice cracked slightly as he felt his eyes tear up.

"Eddie I-"

"No, I can't do this. We're done, go sit with your boyfriend at lunch, and don't bother showing up to the next game either." He stormed out of the room. Once the door had slammed shut behind him you couldn't hold back the tears any longer. You dropped to your knees as the tears continued to rush down your face. You didn't know how long you were in there, it could have been an eternity for all you knew. You had never admitted your feelings to him because you feared he would break your heart. You didn't have to admit them now. He had already shattered it to pieces.

You missed your next class. The tears had stopped but your heart still ached. Anthony had noticed your absence and had searched all over the school to find you.

"There you ar- Hey, what's wrong?" He knelt down beside you. When you explained to him what had happened you couldn't help but cry again. The two of you sat on the floor, his arms around you.

"This is all my fault. I've caused a rift between you and Eddie."

"No, he did that himself. I thought I knew him, I never thought he could be so awful to someone he's never even spoken to. I just wish I hadn't said what I said. Maybe I could have convinced him to give you a chance." The two of you fell silent for a little while as your crying gradually came to a stop. You pulled away to look at your boyfriend. He smiled, softly, down at you. He was handsome, you couldn't deny that but this time you took special notice of his features. No doe eyes. No dimples.

During the last couple of months of your senior year, you sat with Anthony. You tried to reach out but Eddie would avoid you like the plague. He just couldn't face you. His school work began to deteriorate. Sure, he had never been an A* student but he believed he could get by and graduate. All year he had been excited to graduate alongside you. The two of you had planned to get a job together and start saving up to go traveling together. The plan seemed like nothing more than a childish dream to him now.

Eddie's avoidance of her soon turned your emotions from sadness to anger. If only he had listened he would have understood. If only he had been more accepting of Anthony. You missed him but clearly, he no longer wanted you in his life and that hurt soon turned to bitterness. It was strange disliking him so much while still loving him at the same time.

Anthony had been a big support for you though. You believed some part of you would always love Eddie but you hadn't lied when you said you really liked him. It was all so confusing and you felt relief when you had finally graduated. You had heard that Eddie would have to retake his senior year and you did feel your heart ached for him. But the image of the anger in his eyes when he found out about your relationship popped into your mind and it pushed that feeling down.

After your graduation, you got a job working at Scoops Ahoy where you met Robin and Steve. You clicked instantly with them and were glad to have them to try and fill in the hole Eddie left in your heart. You were even closer with them after you discovered Russians were at the Starcourt Mall and you were brought into the Hawkin's own interdimensional monster fighting crew. It had all been confusing and scary but Will's disappearance a couple of years prior finally made sense to you. You had followed Steve and Robin along to a job interview at Family Video and got a job working with your two closest friends once again.

As for your relationship, Anthony had moved across the country for college you tried to stay in contact but you knew the two of you had drifted. You had realised you couldn't love him even though you tried to. You wondered if you would ever love anyone other than Eddie. You felt guilty but nothing could change it and you knew that.

Anthony was visiting home for the weekend and he too had noticed you had drifted. He found his once strong feelings beginning to fade.

"We should break up," He said in a soft, sad voice.

"What? Why?"

"Come on, Y/N, we've drifted and maybe it's just because I'm at college most of the time but I think there may be another reason for it."

"But-"

"Do you love me?" You opened your mouth to speak but you couldn't find the words, you couldn't lie to him. He smiled sadly. "It's him, isn't it? It's Eddie."

"I'm sorry, Anthony." You couldn't meet his eyes.

"I'm just sorry I couldn't make you love me because I did love you."

"And now?"

"When love is unrequited and distance is added to the mix it can fade after time, for some."

"I really am sorry. I tried and I did like you but Eddie. He was my first friend here. I had been in love with him for years."

"We can't help our feelings and you tried to put it aside but sometimes you can't." He was always so understanding. You didn't know how he did it.

"I just don't understand why I can't let him go."

"Maybe it's not unrequited and deep down you know how he feels about you."

"He hates me." You shook your head slightly, meeting the boy's eyes. "And as far as I know I hate him too which has just made things extremely complicated and confusing."

"Well, love conquers all, so it might work out in the end. I hope it does, you deserve it."

"I feel like such I've been such an asshole to you."

"Hey, I'll be alright. You're not an asshole."

"You'll find someone and whoever it is they are gonna be one lucky person." His smile brightened a bit before you pulled him into a hug.

"Thank you for being such a good boyfriend."

"You're welcome, it was a pleasure."

***

"Dustin's right, he didn't do it. I know what Eddie's like sure he's may seem a little eccentric but he could never kill somebody."

"Thank you Y/N- Wait, you know Eddie?"

"Well, I did. We were best friends all through high school."

"Were? What happened?"

"We fell out. Safe to say we definitely not friends anymore. But that's beside the point. We might not get along anymore but he doesn't deserve to be accused of murder when he's innocent."

Dustin and Max had come to Family Video where you were working with Steve and Robin. It was Saturday so you couldn't leave right away to go find Eddie but luckily your shift was nearly over. You were keeping an eye out for customers while you all crowded around the computer, trying to find the address of Reefer Rick. Once you had found it your shift was done. You quickly collected your things before heading out and piling into Steve's car. As Steve drove over to the house, you felt an anxious feeling rise in your stomach. You hadn't spoken to Eddie in what felt like forever. What would he say to you? Would you be able to remain calm and focus on the situation at hand or would everything from the past come rushing forward? Would you scream or cry? Would you tell him you hated him now, or worse, that you loved him?

You looked out of the window, focusing on the blur of trees, trying to calm yourself. What happened between the two of you right now didn't matter. You had to help him.

You found the house and clearly no one was inside so you headed to the boathouse. You stood by the door in case you needed to make a run for it. Steve poked at the tarp laid over the boat with an oar when Eddie jumped out and ambushed him. Dustin eventually managed to calm him down. Eddie turned around and looked at the group, his eyes finally landing on you. You couldn't read his expression but he turned away. He ignored you for the rest of the time the group was there. You just sat quietly as they all explained everything to Eddie.

When they left you and Steve were at the back of the group. He nudged you with his shoulder.

"You okay?" Steve and Robin were the only people you had told about what had happened between you and Eddie and they were well aware of your feelings for him. You nodded your head but could not bring yourself to smile. Steve wrapped an arm around your shoulders, giving you a light squeeze. From the window of the boathouse, Eddie watched as the group walked away but his eyes were only focused on you. He clenched his jaw as he saw the small interaction between you and Steve.

He had been an idiot. He wished he had just agreed to meet Anthony because losing you was the biggest regret of his life. But some part of him still remembered your words from that day. You're the one everyone thinks is a freak.

He wanted to hate you but he couldn't. He never could.

***

"Why can't you someone else take it?"

"Because everyone else with a car a busy."

"But I-"

"Look, I know things are awkward but the guy's gotta eat. Please, just drop it off and then you can leave straight away," Dustin shoved the bag of groceries into your hands. You sighed in defeat before agreeing. Dustin gave you a small smile before turning away.

"Can't I just drive you up there and you take it to him?"

"Nope, I gotta get home, I'm already late I don't want my mom to go into cardiac arrest." You groaned in response. Once again, Dustin had come to your workplace and disturbed the peace with something Eddie-related. Steve and Robin didn't have a shift today and you had been stuck with Keith all day. Luckily, he chose to be anywhere but behind the counter for most of the day, doing god knows what. You checked the clock. An hour before closing time. You took the bag of groceries to the staff room and put it with your own belongings. Even when you went back out to the counter the thought of it and the task given to you loomed over you for the rest of your shift. Finally closing up the store was a relief, you could head over to give Eddie the food and get it out of the way as quickly as possible. On the drive there you couldn't stop tapping your hand on the steering wheel. Even the music blasting from the radio wasn't enough to drown out your thoughts. You parked a little away from the house and walked over there. When you knocked on the door nobody answered. You pushed it open and cautiously walked inside.

"Eddie?" You closed the door behind you and looked around the room. You found Eddie sitting on the floor pressed up against the wall under the window, so that if someone looked in they wouldn't see him.

"What are you doing here?" He got up to his feet.

"Try not to sound too displeased, I didn't volunteer to bring you food," You snapped.

"Yeah, wouldn't wanna be seen near the person everyone thinks is a freak right?"

"I didn't mean everyone. I never once thought you were a freak. I was angry and I said it to hurt you. I regretted it ever since and I'm sorry." You sighed and slumped against the wall, sliding down it and sitting on the floor. Eddie watched you before sitting next to you. "You were my best friend, Eddie, you were the most important person in my life who I wanted to introduce to my boyfriend and you wouldn't do it because you thought you knew him. One chance to introduce the two of you. And you knew back then full well that if he ever said anything about you or our group back then I would have broken up with him." Eddie remained silent for a moment.

"I regretted it. I've spent hours lying in bed thinking about it and you were right. I should've given him a chance, for you. Truth is I was scared. I thought I would lose you because you would be too busy with your boyfriend. And I did lose you and it wasn't his fault, it was mine. But when you said that I really thought you saw me the way everyone else sees me. I thought you didn't really care anymore."

"I never stopped caring. Why do you think I'm here? I could have just not brought the food, stay out of this entire thing altogether but I couldn't. I wanted to help you."

"I thought you hated me."

"I thought I did for a little while too. It was confusing. I still cared for you as my best friend but after that day I felt so much anger about everything. But I don't think I could've ever fully hated you. I don't think that I ever truly did."

"I never hated you. I know I avoided you but I felt the same. I was angry and hurt but I still cared."

"How could we have let this happen to us, Eds?" He couldn't help but smile softly at the nickname.

"We were dumb teenagers." The two of you sat in silence for a couple of minutes. "Can we try again? I'm done with this stupid thing between us and I miss you. You can introduce me to Anthony and I won't judge him before I get to know him."

"I missed you too and I do wanna try again but you don't need to meet Anthony. We broke up."

"Broke up? Why?"

"I couldn't love him and he knew that so we broke up."

"So are you with Steve now?"

"What? Steve?" You laughed a little, turning your head to face him. "He's a great guy but he's definitely not my type."

"What is your type then?"

"We were friends for years, haven't you figured that out yet?" The two of you gazed at each other and you thought back to the first time you had met. The way you had held eye contact just a little too long. Eddie's eyes flickered down to your lips as he leaned slightly forward.

"Everything I know about you and that one still remains a mystery." You smiled at him as you leaned in too before you realised what you were doing. You cleared your throat.

"Um, I should probably go." You stood up and Eddie followed your action. You handed him the bag which you still held in your hand.

"Thanks," He said, gratefully taking it from you. "And thanks for giving me a second chance."

"Thank you, as well." You opened the door and peeked out slightly to make sure the coast was clear. Once you were sure you opened it fully and stepped out. You turned to look at Eddie one more time before leaving, slowly walking backward but you hesitated for a second. A sudden impulse overtook you and you hurried back over to the boy and flung your arms around him. He dropped the bag that was in his hand and wrapped his own arms around you.

"I'll do everything I can to make it go back to the way it was." He smiled at your words but a slight ache in his heart told him he didn't want it the way it was before. He wanted more. But he had lost you once and he wasn't about to ruin it again so he just remained silent. "I really need to go," you said but you made no attempt to move.

"Just one more minute," Eddie replied.

***

You weren't really sure how Dustin and yourself had managed to get back through the gate when Eddie had cut the rope but you did. You weren't about to lose him. For the next couple of days after the two of you had reconciled, you had driven up to see Eddie where the two of you sat and talked for hours. You had missed his laughter.

When you went to the Upside Down for the first time he was there to hold your hand and calm you down. And now here you were again but this time Eddie wasn't next to you. He had run back to take on the bats all alone, hoping to buy the others more time and keep you and Dustin safe. When you had made it back into the Upside Down Dustin cried out because of the pain in his leg. You turned to help him but he shook his head.

"No. Go to Eddie. I'll catch up."

"Dustin, I'll try to get as many bats as I can away from him. Help him, not me, alright?"

"Y/N."

"We don't have time for this, say you'll help him, not me. Say it!"

"Okay, I'll help him."

You ran out of the caravan to see Eddie standing in the middle of a swarm of bats, fighting them off as best he could. You ran towards them as you saw a couple of the bats attack Eddie.

"Hey, over here, come on, come and get me!" You screamed and some of the swarm broke off and headed in your direction instead.

"Y/N, no!" Eddie screamed. Tears were pouring down your cheeks now as you tried to fight the bats off. Some of them managed to bite or scratch you but you weren't worried about yourself. You were worried about Eddie. Dustin had finally caught up, giving a sad look to you, he headed to Eddie as you had instructed. The two of you continued to fight as Dustin started to attack some of the bats to get them away from Eddie. You all were getting tired when all of a sudden it all stopped. As if the bats had been called they moved away from the three of you.

You raced over to Eddie as he dropped to the ground.

"No, no, Eddie." You placed his head in your lap and gently stroked his hair.

"You're gonna be okay, Eddie, we just need to get you to a hospital," Dustin said.

"I-I didn't run away this time, right?"

"No. You didn't." You began to cry.

"You're gonna have to look after the little sheep for me, Dustin. Cause I'm gonna graduate. It's my year. I think it's finally my year." Tears were streaming down your and Dustin's faces as you both looked down at the boy in your lap.

"That's right, Eddie. You're gonna graduate and get a job and we can both save up together. We're gonna go travel, see as much of the world as we can, together."

"Yeah, just like we planned."

"Just like we planned." You nodded in agreement. Eddie reached up and wiped away a tear from your face. "But I gotta tell you something first. Something I should have told you a long time. I love you, Y/N. I always have." You sobbed at his words.

"Eddie, I- Eddie, Eddie!" He began to close his eyes and his breathing slowed. "No, no, please!" Your voice faded along with the light.

***

The bright lights of the hospital room almost blinded him. He was alive. He had no idea how you and Dustin managed to get him back to Hawkins. You would later explain you did it with great difficulty but with the help of Steve, Robin, and Nancy who had made it to them just in time.

He felt a weight in his hand as his eyes slowly adjusted to the light. He looked down to see his hand being held by you. You were curled up in a chair next to him, fast asleep. He smiled at the sight. Gently, he reached over and nudged you awake. You were confused at first but your eyes widened as you saw the boy in front of you.

"Oh my god! Y-you're awake!" A bright smile spread across your face. "How are you feeling?"

"A lot better than I did the last time I was conscious." You laughed slightly.

"I was so worried you weren't gonna wake up."

"It's me, sweetheart, I couldn't leave you, not yet."

"I've got to call your uncle and Dustin. They'll be so glad you're awake! And I'll go get the doctors too." Eddie laughed at your excitement. "I'll be right back." You hurried off to tell the doctors Eddie was awake and call his uncle and Dustin.

***

The doctors checked up on Eddie. He'd been in a coma for close to a month. Once the doctors had left you excitedly explained to him how the plan had been a success (Eddie's alive and Max is okay but I refuse to let that trauma take place in my writing) and how he had been given an alibi and was no longer a suspect. He was a free man.

"This year you really are gonna do it, Eds, you're gonna graduate. Dustin has been taking work from your teachers for you and it may seem like a lot but I'll help you catch up with everything. And some of the guys from Hellfire have also agreed to help in case I'm a bit rusty." There was a knock at the door before Dustin entered the room.

"Dustin!" Eddie exclaims.

"Hey, Eddie, how are you feeling?"

"A bit sore but much better."

You stood up to greet the boy, wrapping your arms around him and giving him a quick hug. He reciprocated it.

"Hey, Y/N, you alright?" He asked as he pulled away.

"Yeah, I'm good. What about you?" You smiled at the boy as he sat down in a chair.

"I'm great." He smiled back.

"I'm gonna get myself some water, give you guys a few minutes to catch if, do either of you want anything?"

"Can I have a glass of water too, please, sweetheart?"

"Sure thing, coming right up. Dustin?"

"Nah, I'm good, thanks"

"Okay, I'll be back in a few."

Once you had left Dustin turned to Eddie with a big grin on his face.

"So?" Eddie gave him a confused look.

"So?"

"You and Y/N, what's going on? Are you together? Did you finally get to talk about what you said?" Right, that's what he was talking about.

"Wait, I actually told her," He sat up straight, a panicked look in his eyes. "Oh my god, I thought I had dreamt it."

"Eddie, you need to talk to her about it."

"No, I can't. I could've ruined everything but she's not mentioned it so either she's ignoring it or can't remember it."

"What are you so worried about?"

"I might lose her again." Dustin gave Eddie a soft smile.

"I don't think you could lose her if you wanted to. You know since you got to put in hospital she visited you every day. She has sat hear and held your hand for countless hours. On days she was working, she'd come straight here from work and wouldn't leave until one of the nurses asked her to. I don't think you're gonna ruin anything, Eddie." Eddie listened carefully to the young boy's words. His heart warmed at the thought of you coming here every day just to see him. Could it be possible you felt the same way? "My point is, just talk to her. You were so brave in the Upside Down against the bats. Admitting your feelings is nothing compared to that." But Eddie disagreed. Somehow, he thought facing his own feelings was far scarier than some bats from another dimension.

"Here you go, Eds," You said as you entered the room carrying two cups of water. She handed one to Eddie, who thanked her, before sitting down in her seat.

"Actually now that I think about it, I want something from the vending machine."

"Dustin, I asked you if you wanted anything."

"It's fine, I need the toilet anyway so I'll get something on the way back." The boy stood up to leave. Making sure you weren't looking, he mouthed 'talk to her' to Eddie. Once Dustin had left the room Eddie turned nervously to you.

"Come here, you." He moved over on the bed, patting the spot beside him. Carefully, you laid down next to him as he wrapped an arm around you. Your fingers found the chain that hung around his neck with a guitar pick. "We need to talk." You moved so you were resting on one of your arms, leaning close to him.

"What about?" You asked, gently.

"That day, I said something to you. I told you I loved you..."

"Eds, you were barely even conscious, you didn't know what you were saying, it's alright, you don't have to explain it to me."

"You think I didn't mean it? I did mean it. I love you. As more than a friend. As in, I am in love with you."

"Eddie."

"But I was so scared that I might ruin everything if you brought it up."

"Eddie."

"But then you never did bring it up so I thought you had forgotten and I was relieved. We could go back to the way we were. But I realised I don't want to keep it from you anymore. I don't want things to go back to the way they were. It's been killing me to keep it in all these ye-"

"Eddie!" You brought your hands up to his face and gently caressed his cheeks. He stopped rambling, his breathing hitched in his throat as his eyes met yours.

"On that day, I wanted to say it back. But then you passed out and for weeks while you were in a coma I cried thinking I would never get to tell you. When you woke up earlier I wanted to bring it up but I was scared, I thought maybe you had forgotten. But the point is, Eds, I love you more than anything." He smiled brightly.

"Really?"

"Yes, really." You laughed softly.

"You wanna know why I couldn't love Anthony?" He nodded.

"Because I already loved you. He was a great guy but he wasn't you. I always noticed the differences in your personality and appearance. When I looked at him I found myself missing your doe eyes and dimples. Have I told you before how much I love your eyes and dimples?"

"No, you haven't."

"Well, I might just have to remind you every day."

"Sounds good to me," He replied before leaning up and softly placing his lips on yours. You kissed back. It was soft and passionate, one full of love and years of longing. You both pulled away, breathing heavily as you rested your foreheads together.

"Yeah, sounds pretty good to me too."

#eddie munson #stranger things #stranger things 4 #eddie munson x reader

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dre6ming · 1 year

Text

The delicate beginning rush

Chapter XI - it’s now or never

Masterlist <all chapters here>

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Pairing: Austin Butler x singer/actress fem reader

Warning: age gap (10 years), mentions of sex, explicit language, fluff, angst

Plot: working with Baz on the soundtrack of Elvis, then flying out to Canada to film, you miss Austin and the both of you put in the effort to make it work

Word count: 6700

Disclaimer: everything fake

Nervous doesn't cover even a tenth of what I'm feeling right now. My flight was awful, it got delayed and then there were turbulence the entire time, so I couldn't sleep, something, I desperately wanted to do, since I couldn't close an eye the whole night. I'm also a bit nauseous. From what? I can't say, maybe it's all the emotional turmoil I've been in or maybe it's just my period coming to bless me. Either way, I feel every single little bump in the road as Matt drives us to the RCA studio. Singing an Elvis song is a huge responsibility in itself, but singing it for the soundtrack of the new biopic, that hasn't even come out yet, it's bigger than huge, it's ginormous.

All morning since we landed 3 hours ago I've been doing vocal exercises, trying to open my throat and get sounds as smooth as possible. I'm pretty sure poor Matt, who's been the main recipient of my singing exercises, is ready to have me shut up and I don't blame him.

The whether in Memphis is a lot colder than LA, but almost everywhere is colder than LA. The sky is clear and the blue shade of it, reminds me of Austin's eyes, which immediately makes my heart sting, because I miss him. He said he would text and call, and it's been only a couple of hours, he texted me "sweet dreams" last night and a "good morning, my darling" this morning. I replied to both, but our conversations were cut short. Last night after I told Joshua that I ultimately think we're better off as friends and maybe work partners with our upcoming duet, I had to pack and go to sleep so there wasn't much time left for me to talk to Austin. And this morning we are both swamped with work.

Thinking back on my conversation with Joshua, I can't help but feel like I was horrible to him and I'd understand if he never wanted to see me again, my team really wants him to feature of my next song "Past life". I haven't even finished it, but I'm close to it and I know I'll have to make it a single, because the whole debacle with Joshua will bring attention to it. Just like the double release of both of out songs boosted the both of us. My team tells me I'm bound to a spot on the top 10 hot 100 and so is Joshua. It also lingers in my mind that I don't want to upset Austin by being close to Joshua, but he's generally a nice boy and talented and in the end it would all be a PR thing, right? Just like him and Kaia, why should it be any different for me? I won't fake a relationship, I'll just sing a duet song about letting yourself love and be loved.

Pressing my finger into my temple I try not to let the headache creep up on me, but my brain has been on high alert for months now. First the divorce of my parents, then the award season, work and now boys. Ugh...

As the car comes to a stop, I zip up my jacket and put my hood on, there doesn't seem to be any paparazzi, but it's better to be safe than sorry. Inside the studio the heat engulfs me and I find myself struggling to take off my warm puffer jacket. "You nervous, miss? You look like you're about to faint." I look at Matt wide eyed. "Really?" I ask in disbelief, touching my face, pinching it to get the blood flowing through my cheeks. He smiles at me, taking the jacket from my hands and resting a calming hand on my shoulder. "You have no reason to be, I know you'll be amazing."

"Agreed. Good day, miss (Y/n)!" Baz comes in extending a hand out to me. "Hello, it's an honor, I'm happy to be here." Baz shrugs me off. "The honor is mine, thank you for coming so soon." He then turns to Matt to shake hands with him as well, something not many do, only because he usually blends in the back and doesn't really get noticed. "You must be (y/n)'s dad, a pleasure to meet you sir, you have an amazing young lady of a daughter here." My smile drops, he thinks Matt is my dad.

I see how Matt doesn't really know how to react, moving his weight for one leg to the other. "Mathew is my driver and head of security, but I appreciate your kind words." I quickly say.

"A pleasure to meet you mr Luhrmann and yes, she is an amazing young lady, there you're quite right." Matt smiles and then he excuses himself, going back to the car. I hate that there's now awkwardness between me and Baz. "I'm sorry for assuming..." Baz starts to apologize, but there's nothing to be sorry for, so I cut him short. "No please, it's fine, if anything he is sort of like a father to me." I assure and Baz smiles at me, showing me the way around the studio.

"So any more exciting plans?" He makes conversation as we sit down. "Yes, I just booked a movie for Netflix and well I'm making music, I'm really just doing what I love and I'm lucky enough to have people around me who support that." I smile as he listens closely to me. "Well you're incredible and on the right path if you ask me, congratulations again for your achievement, an Oscar is a big thing." I wave him off, blushing.

"It is, but it's still just a piece of metal on a shelf, I have to expect that not everything I will do will be so well received, but I'm trying my hardest to make good art moving forward." I explain to him, my thinking. Getting swept away it's extremely easy, especially when you achieve something like I just did, but in my mind, luck has a big part in everything and when luck gives out, I'll need the work and talent to compensate for it. "You amaze me, I think I've met 40 year olds with Oscars who believe they walk on the sun, just because of that title. That kind of mentality will keep you grounded and will only bring you more proud achievements." He says in his thick Australian accent, the chain bracelets around his wrists clinging as he articulated his words with hand movements. "I have a little something for you, I was talking to Pricilla about the sound track and the specific scene where we want to put your singing is one with Elvis and her." He fumbles around his leather jacket, pulling out a small box. "And I told her I was thinking of you to sing "can't help falling in love", she loved the idea, said she was extremely smitten to meet you at the Gala and she asked that I give you this."

He pushes the black velvet box towards me and I take it with shaking hands. Baz leans forward, placing a hand on his chin and tapping his forefinger against his lips, waiting for me to open the box. I lift the top slowly, to reveal a thin gold cuff bracelet with black diamonds imbedded in it. It looks like one of those very popular Cartier bracelets, but the design is a bit different, the bracelet is not a straight band of gold, but rather a squiggly one. "Oh no this is too much!" I gasp trying to give the box back, but Baz pushes against it. "Priscilla said Elvis had this custom made for her when she turned 20, she said you remind her of her younger self a lot, witty, beautiful, smart, hardworking and kind. Pick it up, read the inside." I feel tears of joy prick my eyes and with a bit of struggle I lift the bracelet up from the box to look on the inside of it. There engraved in the gold, in cursive letters it reads: Tender Loving Care ~ for my Cilla from your E.

The overwhelming feeling of happiness takes over me and tears start flowing down my face. Baz takes the bracelet from my grasp and taking my right wrist in his hand he slides the bracelet on. It fits like a glove, sitting beautifully against my skin, providing a comforting weight around my wrist. "She had work to attend and she couldn't be here today, but she hopes that you might want to join her for dinner tomorrow night." Baz adds, offering me a tissue.

I mumble a quick thank you and dry my face, hoping I don't look too bad. "This means a lot," I suck in a breath. "I'd love nothing more than to have dinner with her. Are you sure she wants me to keep this? It looks very expensive and it's hers-" Baz takes my hands in his, smoothing the skin over my knuckles. "I'm sure, now what do you say I introduce you to our producer and we get to work?" I giggle and nod, following him inside the recording room, where he starts introducing me to everyone.

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Hours later I'm on my way back to my hotel, where I plan to just sit in bed and sleep the rest of the day. The recording process went smoothly, I have to go back tomorrow morning to do a couple more takes and finish the background vocals, then we should be set. Baz let me watch the scene for which I'm recording the cover of the song. It's Austin and his costar Olivia, he's dressed in a military uniform, which has no business being that sexy. The two of them talk for a bit and they end up kissing. The scene looked amazing and it told me that the rest of the movie will probably be a success as well, but I couldn't help the little sting in my heart when Austin's lips locked with Olivia's. I tried to play it cool and I hope I did, I'm not sure how much Baz knows about me and Austin, but he never brought him up so neither did I.

"Thank you so much Matt, I'll just be in my room for the rest of the day." I tell him, walking out of the elevator and heading for my room. "Have a good night miss!" I wave at him, unlocking my door and walking into the warm hotel room.

After a quick shower I put on my comfy pajamas, plopping down on the fluffy bed. I stare at my wrist, where the bracelet from Priscilla sits nicely. The black diamonds on it shine in the light. It's unbelievable she wanted me to have such an expensive and important piece of her life. And to think that she sees me as a younger version of herself flatters me beyond description.

As I turn around in bed, I pick up my phone, opening the text messages with Austin.

Me:

Just got to my hotel, I'm done for the day. How about you? 💜🧶

Austin B🕺:

I've got another hour or so, before I can head home. Did you have a good day?

Me:

Yeah I really did! You?

Austin B🕺:

Ugh almost, you know it's getting pretty boring answering all these questions.

Me:

Sorry, ik how that is.

Austin B🕺:

Can I call you when I get home?

Me:

Ofc, I'm free until tomorrow.

Austin B🕺:

Are you gonna tell me what this 'work thing' is? I'm just curious

Me:

Told ya it's a surprise, you're gonna have to wait.

Austin B🕺:

Ok... talk soon 💜🧶

Me:

💜🧶.

I relax into my pillows and stare at the ceiling, unable to stop the huge smile on my face. Slowly I feel sleep creeping up on me and my heavy eyelids give up, falling closed. I'll only doze off for a second, I don't want to miss Austin's call. But it seems that I'm so tired, that I can't actually hold onto my plan and I fall asleep.

After what seems like only minutes, I'm woken up by my phone. I try to rub the sleep away from my eyes, letting out a big yawn. "Baby, I'm so sorry, did I wake you?" Austin asks worried that he interrupted my rest.

" 's fine" I mumble still sleepy. "I was just, resting my eyes." He chuckles, shaking his head. "The ceiling of your room looks nice" Austin quirks, letting me know my still awaking muscles don't seem to have the strength to hold up my phone. I straighten the phone so now the camera captures me, with my hair going in a thousand different directions and my eyes barely open. "There's my beautiful baby, did you have a busy day?" I shake my head and hide my face in the pillows, acting like a small child not wanting to wake up.

"I want to see your eyes (y/n), let me!" Slowly I turn my face to reveal to him, my hazy eyes. A smile takes over his face immediately and I can't help but mirror it. "Are you gonna tell me where you are? It can't be far, since we seem to be on close time zones still." Biting my lip, I place my finger against my lips, not budging into giving any indication about where I am or what I'm doing. He sighs, scratching his head. "Am I gonna have to wait long for this surprise?" Austin tries, but I answer with a simple shrug of my shoulders, which makes him laugh.

"I want to kiss you so bad right now." The breath gets caught in my chest and I can see myself blushing, on the phone screen. "I want that too, maybe come to New York before I have to leave for Canada?" I suggest, but his face says it all. He can't come. I try to push aside the pain in my heart, holding onto hope that maybe I'm reading him wrong.

"I can't baby, I've got a lot of promotion to do and -" he licks his lips, pausing mid sentence, like he's trying to come up with the best way to say what's coming next. "Me and Kaia have to, um" the sound of her name, stabs me in the chest, it shouldn't, but it does, because he's not mine, he's not hers either, but she at least gets to have him more than I do. "We have to do a lot more press, outings and PDA stuff, I promise it doesn't mean anything, I have no control over it and neither does she." His excuse sounds hollow and it doesn't rest my soul in the slightest. There's this voice in the back of my head saying, I've only heard his side of the story, but never hers. He could be lying.

The lump that lodges itself in my throat, makes it difficult for me to breathe, but I try not to show that. "(Y/n)?" Concern drips off of Austin's tongue, he must know that what he just said hurt me. I clear my voice and try to make it sound as steady as I can. "That's fine" lie "it's all just pretend anyway." Lie, lie, lie... I feel like he's lying, like I'm lying, I feel like I'm being gaslit and taken advantage of.

"It's not, I can see on your face it's not, it's ok to be upset, I wouldn't want to be in your position and I swear I wish it could've been you in Kaia's place." That's when it hits me, two can play this game. Me and Joshua still have a duet to release and even though we are friends now, the song is a love song. "Well it's fine, I mean, me and Joshua will probably have to do some promotion for our song anyway, too, so I get it." Lie, why do I keep lying to him?

Austin's lips stretch into a think line. For the first time since we've met, there's awkward silence between us and I hate it. My ears start ringing and if I wasn't sat in bed, I'd probably be fainting. "I'm sorry!" Austin says. Why is he apologizing? I'm confused. "(Y/n) you don't need to feel like you're competing with Kaia, would you feel better if you talked to her?" Blinking a few times, to refocus my vision, I seriously start to wonder if Austin can read my mind. "Would that be embarrassing for me? I- I believe you Austin, but..."

"But you need to be wary of your heart, my daring, I know. It wouldn't be embarrassing, I talked to Alex, the dude she's seeing, I don't see why she won't do the same for me." Austin explains, fidgeting with the rings around his long fingers. I chew the inside of my cheek, debating over if I should take him on his offer or not. The part of my brain that's infatuated with him tells me not to, but the smarter part of my brain pushes me to do it. "I guess I'd feel a bit better, if it's ok with you."

The smile returns to Austin's face, as he bites his bottom lip. "Ok baby, I'll tell her about it." Then he breaks into laughter and even though I can't help but smile, my stomach twists thinking he's laughing at me. "I'm laughing because, remember when we went out for coffee?" I nod waiting for him to go on, no idea where this is going. "Well Kaia wasn't the one who wanted to meet up, I lied." He scrunches up his nose, rubbing it with the back of his hand. "I, um I asked her if I could say that she was the one who wanted to meet you for coffee, but it was actually me, all along." I'm stunned. Him wanting me is such a strange thing, but it's real, very real. "Really?" I ask

Austin nods, rubbing his lips together, before wetting them with his tongue. "I guess after that night at the Met, I just want to know you better, but I didn't want to google it or anything, I wanted to meet you from you." My heart is doing laps in my chest and it's getting hard to breathe. I see myself blushing on the screen and I can't help but feel a bit embarrassed by how easily Austin gets my heart pounding. "And then dinner at your place, well Kaia was supposed to come, but she really did have to fly out. I almost ditched, but I guess I told myself: it's now or never."

"Be mine forever..." I sing, giggling, which makes him smile brighter than ever before. "Well that one is a great song, I do have to say." Austin points out. "Aren't they all?" I quirk a brow at him, biting back my smile. "They are, they are!" He admits. I feel another yawn coming through and I try to stop it, but failing.

"Rest the phone on the pillow and close your eyes, I'll sing you to sleep." He says in a low raspy voice. I open my mouth ready to tell him I'm not that tired, but another yawn comes out and Austin giggles. I place the phone on the pillow next to my head, so he can se me laying on my side in bed. "You're beautiful, so beautiful!" He says and I take in a deep breath, blinking fast. "Now close your eyes!" Austin tells me and I comply, but knowing he's there watching me, makes keeping my eyes closed, feel like torture.

"Try to think that love's not around, Still, it's uncomfortably near" he sings softly, tickling my senses. I recognize the song immediately. "You remembered?" I gasp opening my eyes to look at him, finding him with his lips stretched in a big smile over his pearly white teeth. "Of course I did, my brain is a sponge for everything you say, now eyes closed baby, you need to sleep." I giggle and snuggle my face back in the pillow enjoying the soft fabric of it. Austin clears his throat and continues singing 'Angels eyes', the song I told him was my favorite out of Frank Sinatra's discography. My heart twists in my chest with this warm feeling I've been having only around him, a feeling I can't yet describe. "My old heart ain't gainin' any ground. Because my angel eyes ain't here" funny enough the lyrics kinda work for our situation as we are apart right now.

As he keeps on singing, I feel sleep take over me slowly and I try to fight it, wanting to enjoy his voice some more, but I'm so tired I don't even make it through the whole song before I fall into a deep slumber.

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"Falling in love with you..." I finish my last take for the song, taking off my headphones and going over to the producer to listen back to my vocals. "This sounds beautiful, so beautiful!" Baz says, clapping for me. "Thank you, oh my, I really hope I did good." I say placing a hand on my chest, smiling brightly.

"Oh you did, definitely, it sounds so magical the way you sing it...in fact I was thinking, why don't you join us at the Cannes Film Festival in June? You could perform at the premiere after the screening, I think it would be magical." Baz articulated his words with big hand gestures, as I try to wrap my head around everything he's saying. He wants me to perform at the premiere of Elvis? At Cannes?

He must of read the fear written all over my face, since his smile glitches for a second. "Sir, it's an honor. Really. But are you sure you want me to perform? I mean by that time I would've barely dipped my toe in the music industry..."

"Let me just stop you there, you realize who you're talking about right?" My brows draw together in confusion. "You are talking about a very talented young woman, who has an incredible voice, whose songs are charting and whose movies are adored and awarded. So yes honey, I'm sure." Trying to hide my blush, I look away, but I can't actually contain my smile. By now I'm used to people saying things like that to me, but it's still very hard to swallow. I can't deny most of that, but my forever present lack of confidence and overthinking issues put a dent in my joy. "Well if you think it's what you want, then I'll do it." I agree and Baz is quick to hug me tightly. I pat his back, struggling to breathe in his tight hold. "Easy there, I need these lungs to sing." I laugh and he lets go of me, looking at me with a huge smile. I can't really describe it, but everything about Baz just screams father figure and for some reason in the short time I've spend with him, I've grown quite fond of his words and affection. "Well get ready to fly miss (y/n)!" Baz adds snapping her fingers with excitement.

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After I had dinner with Priscilla, I was back on a plane to New York, where I only got to stay for 5 days before packing my cats and bags to move to Canada for 3 to 4 months. It's actually quite nice here, a bit colder then I'd expected, but still lovely. The sights are wonderful, even with summer approaching there's plenty of snow so it feels like a prolonged winter, which in my opinion is always welcomed.

Filming has been going smoothly, Kyle and I have been having lots of fun with it and the more we work the more I get confident that this movie will be great. The love story between the two characters is epic and the development of it is so well built. It's truly unfortunate that they got their story cut short, but at least my character Tessa seems like she might be headed for a good ending.

In my free time I've been busy FaceTiming Jack and Finneas, recording takes in the makeshift studio we had built in the small apartment. Also I've been texting back and forth with Taylor, working with her on her new album, I don't plan to be a featured artist on it, just a co-writer on some of the tracks as well as the usual background vocals.

Now in all this work load one might wonder where do I fit 'a more than friends' situation. Well it barely fits, me and Austin try to make it work. We text everyday and call regularly, we tell each other about our day and future plans and work, so far I've played him most of my upcoming album, but I'm still keeping secret me being part of the Elvis Soundtrack or the fact that I'll be at Cannes with him. While he'll be there with his girlfriend, a girlfriend that's not me. Sure I've spoken to Kaia, I even met Alex, her real boyfriend, over FaceTime, but it still hurts to see the guy you like be packaged and sold with someone else.

Still even with all this talking and texting the distance is hard, I miss him, the scent of him, his warm touch. It's been a very long month. I miss it all and now as I push my way through the door of my small rental apartment a sigh leaves my lips. The place looks nice and it's cozy, but besides me and my two cats it's empty. Not as empty as the huge penthouse in New York, but close and I guess that answers my question about selling the penthouse and moving to a smaller apartment. Turns out just making the cage smaller, doesn't really make the inside feel fuller.

Today the apartment looks a bit different though, almost like something is missing? My cats! "William? Simba? Here kitty kitty!" I call them, but they don't come out of their hiding which makes anxiety bubble inside me. I take my jacket and shoes off in a hurry and make my way through the small hallway into the living room. I decide the kitchen might be a good place to search for my little trouble makers. The place is dead quiet and my cats are missing.

Suddenly the creaking floor behind me, scares the life out of me. Turning around I cover my mouth to stifle a scream. And there in front of my eyes with a grin on his face is...

"Austin!" I squeal and run over to him, jumping in his arms, latching myself onto him like a little monkey, locking my ankles behind his back. I nuzzle my face in the crook of his neck, inhaling his intoxicating scent. "Missed me, my darling?" I kiss his neck along his pulse line, all the way up to the corner of his mouth, letting my teeth graze his skin ever so slightly. "Yes I did." I say, brushing my lips over his, tasting his breath on my tongue. The corners of his mouth turn upward and one of his big hands leaves my back, to rest on my cheek, pulling me all the way into his mouth. We both sigh into the kiss, after weeks of being apart, touching him feels surreal and it's like life is coming back to me. Being far from him was horrible, I felt his absence in every pore. But now he's here. Austin is here.

He moves his lips against mine, slow and gentle, the tip of his tongue tickling my bottom lip, teasing. With a short gasp I let him in and he takes dominance into the kiss, sucking the breath out of me. "How did you?" I say out of breath resting my forehead against his, brushing my fingers through his hair, to make sure he's real and not just a product of my imagination. "Matt helped me a bit, he gave me the key." He shrugs his shoulders like it's nothing. My smile is so big and I can't help the way my heart beast against my chest. Austin's hand that's cupping my cheek, slides along my neck and finds a resting spot on my chest above my heart. "It's like a humming bird, for fucks sake, I've missed you!" He admits bumping our noses together, kissing the tip of my nose. "My pretty baby." Austin whispers with his lips against my cheek.

My eyes flutter close and I feel lightheaded, the way he calls me his, has my brain turning to jello. "I missed you too" I admit, squeezing him tighter. He slowly starts to move around the place, setting me on the kitchen counter. "I have a few free days and I wanted to surprise you." Grabbing a handful of his sweater I pull him closer, there's heat coming off of him and I enjoy it, having missed it for weeks now. "Baby? Are you upset?" Austin asks pulling back to look at me. Confused I shake my head and he comes down to kiss my cheek right under my eye. His flaming lips touch my still cold skin and his tongue teases my flesh. "Why are you crying then?" He whispers.

"Oh, oh, I'm, no -" I turn around and reach for the tissue roll, grabbing one and quickly dabbling my face. "It's because I just came out of the cold. My eyes water." I set the crumbled up tissue aside and thread my hands through his long blond hair, pulling at the roots. "Hm" he hums, tilting his head back. I smile and kiss his pulse line. "Have you eaten?" Austin asks, holding my waist, squeezing my sides. "No, I was going to...where are William and Simba?" I question remembering what had me stressed in the beginning.

Chuckling lightly Austin moves away from between my legs, leaving my arms to fall limp. He walks over to the door of my bedroom and opens it, the two cats coming running out of the room. "I asked them nicely to let me have my moment." He smirks.

I jump down form the counter, picking up Simba, as he goes to pick up William, who seems to have taken a special liking towards Austin. "I bought treats for them on the way here, but you'll need to approve them, cause I've never had cats before." Austin speaks, scratching William's stomach. Something about the way he acts around my cats makes me feel some type of way. "I never asked, why William? I mean Simba I get, the lion king, right? But this little guy?" William purrs in Austin's arms, snuggling close to his chest. "My favorite book series when I was 16 had a character named William."

"So no link to the royals?" He laughs and I simply shake my head, placing a kiss on top of Simba's head. "Ok then." He puts William down on the nearby couch, clapping his hands. "Sit right here and I'll make you dinner, how does some chicken cooked in the oven with white wine and rosemary potatoes sound?" I sit on the couch and twist around to face him. "Sounds like something very, very tasty." I unbutton my knitted cardigan as I'm starting to feel the warmth inside the apartment. Austin watches me take off my cardigan, then like snapping himself out of a haze, he blinks fast, turning on his heels to go start working on dinner.

Closing my eyes for just a moment, I hold Simba close to my chest and William comes to curl next to my head, purring. "So I've been thinking maybe tomorrow you could get a free day and we could spend it together? Go on a walk on the beach, watch a movie." Austin proposes and I take my phone out, already texting the director about getting a free day.

"We could, I'll see if I can get the day off, we're on time with filming so there's a big chance I will get it." Getting up, I stretch my arms and legs, going to the bedroom to change into something more comfortable. A fluffy cream loungewear set is my choice and I braid my hair out of my face. After the few minutes it takes me to get unready, when I come back in the kitchen, Austin is putting the food in the oven for it to cook.

I come behind him and hug his waist, pushing my face into his back, inhaling his woodsy scent. His hands come to hold my, rubbing up my arms. "The interview with Variety is coming out tomorrow, are you excited?" Austin asks me, spinning around in my arms to face me. He leans against the kitchen counter, looking down at me with his bright blue eyes. "I guess I am, yeah, it's a beautiful peace and what about you, a new Elvis trailer is coming soon, are you excited?" I wiggle my brows at him, making him laugh with his head thrown back. "I am, now about those treats I brought." He goes out of my arms, over to his bag which was hidden behind the couch. He digs through it and pulls out a bag of cat treats, coming over to hand it to me. "Salmon, their favorite" smiling I shake the bag and both of my cats, quickly jump off the couch. Austin opens the bag and crouches down holding a few treats in each of his palms, so the little fluff balls can enjoy them. My heart feels so light in my chest, watching him be here, for me, doing these small acts of affection.

I sit down on the floor next to him and hug his neck, peppering kisses all over his face. Austin giggles like a child and turning quickly around he tackles me to the ground, with him on top of me, tickling me sides. While his skilled fingers, tickle my stomach, his wet full lips kiss my neck tenderly. "Austin.." I laugh trying to push him off of me, but not really putting any effort into it, since I don't want him to actually get up. "I'm making Dandelions a single." I say between fits of laughter, which stops Austin in his tracks and he comes up to catch my lips in a sweet kiss. "I love that song so much." He mumbles against my lips.

We move in sink, our lips soft and wet, brushing against one another. My heart keeps doing laps in my chest and heat rises within me. I wrap my legs around his waist and pull Austin closer. His tongue touches my bottom lip and I give him full permission to explore. My brain is blank, all I know and care about is him on me. I don't even care about the hard wood floor hurting my back. I walk my hands over to his back, dragging my nails down it. "Mmh baby." Austin groans and a little whimper escapes me.

His hands grab my hips, holding me flush to the floor. "We need to stop baby." He kisses down my neck, sucking the skin above my collarbone, dragging his tongue over the flesh. "I don't want to." I whine, bringing his face back up, kissing him forcefully, squeezing my legs around his waist, bringing his crotch close to mine. Austin moans, thrusting his hips against mine. "Aus..." I sigh with my head thrown back and my eyes screwed shut.

I'm in a bliss, my senses completely diluted by the powerful feeling of him on top of me. But he pulls back swiftly, bracing himself on his arms above me. My head lifts off the floor, trying to reach his lips, but he holds his ground, pulling even further back. "Baby, no, I don't want you doing something just because you feel pressured or anything." He speaks in a low voice, brushing some of the strands of hair that came out of my braid. His calloused fingers magic against my soft skin.

Embarrassed I turn my head away from him, suddenly feeling so out of place. "No, (y/n), honey it's normal to want to do stuff, but..." I don't want him to finish talking so I push against his chest wanting to get up from the floor, away from him. Every cell in me feels so stupid for acting so so, I don't even know. Austin let's me get up, but he's quick to join me onto the couch and pull me into his chest, kissing the top of my head. "I'd do anything for you, (y/n), I swear, but I'm not sure you want to have sex now." I hide my face in my hands, but he takes my wrist and move my hands away, so he can look me in the eyes.

"How does it feel? I mean I'm sure you've done it, I'm just curious." I feel my cheeks on fire, but I have to ask, I've been curious for a while now and I didn't really have anyone to ask. Austin smiles at me, but not in a way that makes me feel dumb, but rather in a way that makes me feel safe. "I don't know how to describe it and I don't know how it feels for girls, but for me, it just feels good, you feel warm all over and your heart pounds in your chest and then it feels like there's this elastic band that keeps on stretching and stretching until it finally snaps and it's the most euphoric feeling." He twirls around a strand of my hair, kissing my forehead. "I'll show you, when you feel ready." He promises.

"What if I'm ready now?" I ask looking at him with puppy eyes. "It's your choice (y/n)" looking down at my lap, I try to think, really think if I'm ready for sex, sex with Austin. I don't know really, I want to see what it feels like and I trust him to be loving and caring about it, but I have yet to fully label us as a couple, so it would just feel like jumping over a few steps. "I was just curious, I think" I shrug my shoulders.

"And I'm happy you felt comfortable with telling me that..." he stops mid sentence, pursing his lips, "have you ever, done anything? Alone or with anyone?" He asks and I look around a bit confused, but I understand what he means. "N-no, I um, I've read some about it, I've seen movies and I think I've felt, aroused?" I'm unsure of what I'm saying is right and there's a part of me that fears I'm laughable, but Austin is serious, listening closely. "Okay, have you touched yourself?" He ask, caressing my back. I simply shake my head.

Austin licks his lips, his eyes, never leaving mine. "Well I think you should try that first, maybe, find what you like on your own."

"How do I do it?" I ask, I'm not stupid I know a bit about self pleasure, but I've never done it. His lips come close to the shell of my ear, as he speaks in a raspy tone, causing shivers to crawl down my spine. "I can show you, if you want me to." I open my mouth ready to speak, but instead of words, a ding sound comes out, the timer for the food finished, so Austin sighs getting up to take the food out. I'm left on the couch, flushed watching him move around the kitchen. He turns around holding the tray of food smiling brightly at me, so I giggle getting up and joining him at the table, ready to enjoy his cooking.

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