Rewatching Fit and Pac roleplaying on the Pollo Feliz and everything felt like a slap to the face.

The "No fucking the waitress" sign and Pac immediately saying he is a waitress. Fit asking for a table for two, and then asking for drugs and beer, their whole conversations in Spanish when neither of them speak it, Fit saying "I appreciate you" every time Pac got him something.

And finally the translation mod came in with the steel chair and made Pac say "you are gorgeous"

Yeah, normal day.

I think that my brain needs to be studied because it’s baffling to me how whenever I start a project, after writing one or two wips I immediately get a writer’s block and then I jump on the next fixation, and as a consequence the next fanfiction, ending up with millions of wips and not even ONE full fanfiction that I could possibly publish.

Oh my God!! Wes from Don't Starve!!

I’m sorry for the moments I wasn’t good to you. I’m sorry I’m so complicated with my feelings and thoughts. I feel like I’m difficult to deal with as a friend and even as a lover. Im sorry for who I am as a person. I’m still learning and growing and healing from things.

Bread is so good. Thank you for everything

when someone says something about my appearance and all of a sudden i’m rethinking all of my life choices.

i wish i just stayed cis

I always sing MJF's theme like, "beep boop beep boop beep boop" and I have made it impossible to appropriately react to any of his entrances. I just sit here sounding like a broken robot.

next time my parents bring up my exam scores as a "gotcha" to say that i'm only being pessimistic and that i don't actually struggle with anything i'm just sending them the wikipedia article for pyrrhic victory

im hungry

but i think i'd rather starve myself after what happened.

hey besties time for a cptsd vent post

it feels weird feeling like a burden when you ask people to be sensitive to a trigger but they don’t even know about the related side things that are triggering that you’d never mention because you know they’re ridiculous

my example being weed being triggering but i’ve never told people about how coughing, bubbling liquid noises, and the smell of skunks are also really triggering but i deal with those panic attacks alone lol

I know this one thing won't change. Your obligation to work is more important. Where are you for the "for wrost" part of "for better and for worst"...

Why do you leave... why does my only safe place abandon me.

She knows she can run away and I'll be too tired to talk anymore when she gets home. So she says "I'm sorry"

I say "it's fine" and we move on. She knows I will just... cave. I have no backbone. I have no self worth, I have no self esteem, no sense of safety or security.

Life sucks.

Everything I've ever had could be taken, that hasn't changed.

I'm told to make boundaries. Why? No one cares about them. No one respects them. I have to give all this respect, but I get none back...

I'm so tired...

Some things about myself

Aesthetic attraction

Asexual (specifically Aegosexual apparently)

Aromantic

Autistic

Anxious

Depressed

Introverted

Almost all A's. Crazy.

me: to me "take ur days off u deserve it"

also me: to me "STOP USING UR DAYS OFF WHAT IF THEY THINK UR LAZY/NOT A GOOD FIT AND FIRE U"

I get it’s really hard to be everything a bpd person needs…

Thinking about Caleb “I-use-people’s-full-names-to-show-intimacy” Widogast and the way he calls Veth “Veth the Brave.” It’s not all the time—it’s rarely used, actually, saved for specific moments, only when he’s using the fondest of tones, with the most admiration, and how calling her that is more intimate than just “Veth Brenatto.” Because Veth the Brave is both of her identities. It’s Nott and it’s Veth, it’s their co-mingling, it’s her in her entirety. Veth the Brave. That’s why it’s so intimate, because he is speaking to all of who she is