#i was expecting 3k…. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ruumirmir · 1 year

Text

Reprise of a rolling mist

Part 1 Part 2 (soon)

☽◯☾ Summary - You, the revered God of Healing and Mist, one of the oldest friends of Zhongli, are not one to be easily taken down, but alas, in the Archon war of brutal massacres, you can’t escape death for long. ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ☽◯☾ Characters - Zhongli, (minor) Cloud Retainer, (minor) Madame Ping ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ☽◯☾ Tags - Zhongli x Reader || Gender Neutral || Angst || Eventual happy ending || Description of blood, violence, and fatal injuries || Mention of death ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ☽◯☾ Word count - 1.2k ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ☽◯☾ Rumour◇ says - my first ever fanfic to be published on tumblr. In case you haven’t seen my previous post, please do! It has some context in it. I hope i did peepaw some justice,, as much as I love him, it was slightly hard to pin his personality down especially in this wild scenario. I’ll probably belt out the part 2 really soon cause I’m done with it, just gotta decorate the post lmao.

‎• ——————————————————————— The nearby corpse of a beast twitches once before falling still. The loud ringing in your head gets louder by the passing minute. Mouth set into a grimace, you roll onto your back and hack out a wet cough.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ It's hard to breathe with a gaping hole in your torso, still fresh and bloody. Your half-lidded eyes focus onto a speck of ash, floating up to melt into the night air. ‎ ‎

‎ ‎ ‎

The God of War doesn’t fear. No. He is the one who’s feared. And yet...

“No...”, Morax kneels there, watching his old friend, laid upon the charred grass.‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

Your once lustrous hair, now melds into the soot-stained ground, tainted by blood and grime. Your breaths come shallow and short. For all the dust and debris left in the battle's wake, Mt. Tianheng had a pleasant breeze to offer.

His palm find its way to yours; cold to the touch. Fingers tighten around you, and the clarity slowly returns to your hazy eyes.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

The stench of burnt flesh permeates the air. His gaze lingers over the yawning cavity in your body; charred at the edges. From such a pair of gods, its not Morax who wields the power to heal and mend. It’s not you who possesses the energy to do so.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ And so. his hands tremble uselessly over your gut, or the lack thereof.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

His most trusted. His closest companion. His oldest friend... The one who shares countless memories with him. The one who had promised to do so for many more years to come.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

"M-morax," his name spoken like a sigh. The corners of his mouth twitch into a small smile. Your stomach flares in pain when you fight back a strangled whine. "I am... not your burden to bear amidst a battle."

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

He sits by you, pained. “Hush... do not strain yourself by talking.” You lie before him, bleeding.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

“O great Rex Lapis, won't you be kind? Won't you be wise? Renounce your lands and people? Spare us all a calamity from befalling those subjects of yours? It’s the least of your payment... for eons of slaughter caused by your hands”

A great many creatures had cackled, with many more swarming in. The seething mass of... beastly wasps, misshapen and overgrown, were all too eager for a massacre. A hivemind; disgustingly coordinated in brains and brawn. ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

By the first rumbling of his meteorite that bombed over Mt. Tianheng, a familiar billowing mist had rolled forward to assist. Whether in your solid body, or a lashing mist, it was hard to quell the pyro gnats. ‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

The grass is stained red by now. He takes your hand and grips it tight, to his chest. You brush your fingers over his bruised knuckles.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ By the second rumbling of raining spears, Morax’s harsh orders had sent the adepti and yakshas scrambling towards the unprotected city of Liyue. . . . By the third rumbling of his shield molding around you... a flaming projectile had already shot clean through your torso.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

You need to fight to keep your eyes open. From a simple flesh wound... what a joke. Your not the admired deity of recovery, just in name, are you?

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ Your fingers twitch, tightening around his robes. "Help me sit upright..."

His sharp exhale falls upon your brows, and with the utmost softest touch, You’re pulled up against his torso. Your head sags against his shoulder, where you can feel the thick pool of sorrow under his skin.

"Please... I do not want to cause you more hurt," The words fall hollow from his lips. He holds you up gently, and you can finally focus on his face. … where you’re met with a wet shine to his eyes.

"What... are you trying to do?" His mouth trembles downwards ever so slightly.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

But you... you break out in a rebellious smile, don’t you?

The pain is unbearable. And you laugh all the harder for it. Sweat beads your forehead, and your fingers dig into his arm when he presses into your stomach to slow the bleeding. You bite out a groan. It burns.

"Don't look at me like that Morax", you pant. "This... this is but child’s play for a healer of my caliber...."

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

Yet, your life trickles out like the grains of sand in an hourglass, and your vision flickers.

He wipes the blood off your lip, clearly vexed, "You are still yourself, I see. Even as you lay here, near death, you are still joking."

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

"Just... won’t you humor me one last time?" You rasp out, feeling faint. All sensations except the gritting pain have left already. "Lend me some energy- so my body can return to what it once was..."

"Because... I, the Healer God of Mist, am alone the revered one... who holds mortality at my fingertips..." your voice breaks towards the end, but you still flash a smile of dogged arrogance, don’t you? (There is nothing but a theory borne from your feverish thoughts.)

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

He gazes at you; minutes away from the end. The god who holds no regrets, who has not one ounce of fear in their voice. (You have never been more terrified of death, for you only know how to run from it.) With a melancholy rustle of feathers, comes another soft voice, "Ever so conceited, until the very end...”, Cloud retainer murmurs into the night.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

His skin glows alight, veins illuminated on his chest and arms. His gnosis ignites for your fanatical whims. It always did. "How could I ever refuse you...?", his trembling voice, so quiet. You’re met with a familiar embrace.

‎ … ‎ ‎ ‎ “If mortals pray to gods in their time of need, who does a god pray to?”

Two drops fall to your neck, rolling away until they wet your clothes.

“No one.” His smile is soft, and voice raspy. “A god can only pray to himself... but, he may have hope in others.” ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎

Your body slowly starts to dissipate into millions of droplets of condensation that scatter into the air, where the wind blows parts of you away, and away. ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ The soft tunes of a zither ring out into the air, permeating the atmosphere with a slow melody. An adeptus sits atop a nearby rock, her eyes downcast.

ah. ‘Ping's zither’, you sigh. ‘How kind of her.’

And he smiles through his tears.

Isn't it beautiful?

A great rolling mist dissolves into the air. With dust and ash in the air, it swirls and rises up and above. The wasted grassland is littered with thousands of droplets that shimmer like stars as the moonlight reflects off them. It is as beautiful. as it is empty.

On a night like this, Streetward rambler’s tune graces the wind, until her fingers bleed. Cloud Retainer sheds no tears, but know that she holds your memory well.

And you, Rex Lapis,

Morax,

you weep for me.

Taglist - @ainescribe || @theorchardcollective || @flos-historia || @nightrayseishina || @thesparklingwriter

185 notes · View notes

biblionerd07 · 3 months

Text

Honestly ready to cry or something. I’ve tried two different brands and three prescriptions and I cannot find contacts that work anymore. Whoever at Johnson & Johnson made the decision to limit prescriptions in Acuvue astigmatism lenses, I hope you have a MISERABLE life and know you are going to hell.

#I just want to be able to see!!!!#wearing my glasses all day gives me a headache and I hate driving in them #I NEED contacts how do you expect me to play sports #god I fucking hate capitalism #I can’t have my glasses on my face for longer than a few hours at a time before the feeling of them makes me want to scream #so my options now are apparently that or just not be able to see clearly while my contacts slide around and are off #or pay $3k for ONE custom contact lenses that I’m positive my insurance won’t cover

16 notes · View notes

a-local-idiots-shitpost · 6 months

Text

I started writing the Neige story and it's already over 1K words, I really hope this won't be a Thirteen situation

*edit* actually I just want to add it's been 1K words and all that happened was Yuu may or may not trying to kill their oponents with Marbels and ending up being crushed amd barwly talking with Neige, I have a feeling this will be a Thirteen situation like not that long but definetly more than I expected

#local shouldn't be allowed to think #my expectancy is 3K so if I beat that I would be surprised #but I'll also add like at least two more times Yuu will try to kill Neige and then just want to add Vil encouraging it #like Yuu telling him Neige has a crush on them and he just might want to use this against him #I mean he wanted to use Epel as his “poisoned apple” so I wouldn't put it past him

26 notes · View notes

mightyjemma · 2 months

Text

we could start a war (or we could live in peace)

Some nights Chris cannot sleep.

(he wakes up coughing then, the pressure of a boot on his ribcage, ash in the air and in his lungs and hair. the feeling of fire too close to his skin, on his skin, burning flesh until the pain stops and all nerve endings are dead.

it isn't real. but it feels real. it was real, in another life.)

(charmed 1998, chris halliwell centric)

#charmed #charmed 1998 #chris halliwell #chris x bianca #i started this fic in march 2022 #it's only 3k and i'm a dumbass who writes like a snail #currently working on another one that's so so cool and already 10k but at the speed i'm writing you can expect it 2027 sorry #my stuff

11 notes · View notes

shadowqnights · 1 day

Note

loverman question here, how did you come up with your rewrite of katelyn? lowkey katelyn doesn’t get enough love outside of “hot strong woman” so i think it would be cool to hear how you decided her backstory and changes you made like her family, her last name, guard academy relationships, and her role in future arcs

HI I LOVE MY REWRITE/LOVERMAN KATELYN! Let's chat about her cause I'm insane.

Honestly, I think loverman!Katelyn is one of my most authentic and up-to-date rewrite depictions that I wouldn't change much of when it came down to new-rewrite stuff. I have a LOT to say about her though so this is going to be long, my bad! I'll break down like each specific explanation for things you listed here into Sections, and then anything else I think of can just slot in.

Backstory and Family Life

I think the biggest changes lay here, and I think I actually got most of the like backstory inspiration here from Garroth. They are fables for each other, warnings about how the other could have turned out. Of course, they've got significant differences, and Garroth's position as the 'heir' is far more significant for O'Khasis than Katelyn's is, but essentially I'm passionate about Garroth and Katelyn growing up as peers and equals around the same age in O'Khasis. They both understand each other, even watching each other from a distance, being raised in rich O'Khasis neighbourhoods as eldest children expected to take up the mantle of their parents' expectations and legacies. They both attended Guard Academy together, but they weren't exactly friends there.

Katelyn's parents and their personalities are somewhat borrowed from their MyStreet counterparts - Elizabeth being a sharp and cunning socialite of sorts with strong ties to the Ro'meave family, hence where Katelyn and Garroth's relationship stems from. They would see each other regularly at dinners and large-scale events. Her father Eric is a very well-renowned guard from Tu'la; he taught her how to fight. She has a number of younger brothers, one of which is still Kacey but I haven't been able to write yet. Garroth's obviously the eldest of his brothers, and they both take up a lot of duties that involve caring for their younger siblings and trying to keep them safe from the more mature burdens that come with high O'Khasis society.

I think the big reason I wanted to incorporate O'Khasis into Katelyn's backstory was so that she and Garroth could have this interesting dynamic of both understanding and hatred specifically because of that understanding. They're not confused about each other, they knew exactly why they ended up where they did, they just don't like it because it reminds the other too much of themselves. They are each other's cautionary tales. Katelyn serves as this vision of hell for Garroth where he sees exactly what kind of terror he could have become if he had stayed as a guard in O'Khasis - he could have become a significant member of the Jury, and even if Zane had not been controlling it, he still would have become an obedient soldier. He despises her because he's afraid of that person, but at the same time wants to see her free of it because he knows, just like he once had to figure out, that she deserves better and she can be free. Seeing Garroth in Phoenix Drop disgusts Katelyn because she knows that's what she could have been. She could have run away and chosen to begin a new life, but that would mean abandoning her family and abandoning her dream. She hates that he shunned his responsibilities but she still burdened hers, and now they are exactly where the other might long to be. She wishes that she could have run, too - in a way, I think it also stings to think of Garroth living an honest country life in a small distant town, not just because that's what she could have made for herself, but also because she knows that Jeffory was raised in Bright Port and very much only became a guard to be able to go home and protect that small, cozy lifestyle. Only to also be taken in by the city and lose himself there by working for Zane. She envies Garroth because she knows that so many lives were stolen by the Jury's bounds, and now even those small-town boys have become killers.

By the time they see each other as adults again for the first time, Garroth is realising that maybe he would be more useful working to enact change from within O'Khasis - whereas Katelyn is realising that while she's helping her family from within O'Khasis, she isn't actually doing any moral good and that Zane has deceived her. They were both corrupted by their superiors back home, and now strive to find any sort of identity apart from what they were Made for. Garroth was raised for nobility but strains to hold the sword; Katelyn was made into a weapon by Zane but struggles to reclaim the young girl she was prior to that. She feels satisfied that she's taken such a far turn and separated herself from her mother, but has somehow also betrayed her father in the process of trying to protect him. She has lost herself in the sword, and since there is no amount of righteousness or goodness in being wielded by Zane, she has disappointed him.

Garroth and Katelyn disgust each other because they secretly want what the other has. They are both wanting for more, but hate each other for their cravings because while Garroth is at his best, Katelyn is at her worst, and then the other way around as well. That's why I inserted Katelyn where she is. Their bond in MyStreet is equally as interesting, but I think it's so fun to explore in MCD. They contrast and complement each other so beautifully. They even looked pretty identical as babies, since hair dye is real in my rewrites, and Katelyn didn't start altering her hair until she met Ivy. I'm fairly sure somewhere in my Ro'meave family tree that they're distant cousins or something.

NOTE: I wish I could tell you that her last name has like a deep and interesting meaning but when I tell you that I really don't remember when or how I came up with it, it just happened at random when I was mushing words in my brain for the PDH rewrite roster. Her surname is La Vatris, which I guess originally I was trying to go for something French considering la, but vatris literally has 0 meaning to my knowledge in. any language. But that's her name now and I don't want to change it, I just have to deal with the fact that it means nothing and I have no idea how I came up with it. I think largely because it complements Ro'meave nicely, considering their families are so interwoven.

Guard Academy

I love playing with my little dolls at the Guard Academy. In general I think I love fleshing out how the MCD guards were at the academy because I imagine this is how gleeful Jess was when writing PDH. For so many characters, this period is treated like their awkward, vague little blip in their lives with no real significance. They went to school x2. The End. Like no. This is the juiciest time of their lives. These are teenagers-young adults with swords. I'm putting them in fantasy high school. Fuck you. The children yearn to hit each other with weapons.

The answers to your question here are actually way simpler, since Katelyn doesn't have that many academy relationships and the ones she does have were just important enough to me to want to form earlier in her life.

Like mentioned before, she knew Garroth in the academy but they weren't really friends. In fact, it's really awkward for her to see him around, despite the fact that they probably need each other. It's plain embarrassing. Garroth's in this horrifically awkward period where he's struggling to socially relate to a lot of the other kids, who aren't exactly raised to be Lords, much less told by their fathers that they'll be a king one day. She's also actually around a year younger than him I thiiiink? They have different classes and entered at different times. Ignore him for now his only purpose is for like incredibly awkward meetings and for Zane and Garte to visit to pick him up sometimes.

There are only really two relationships that mattered enough to me to like, build a foundation upon the Guard Academy. Ivy and Jeffory.

Ivy.

Ivy is Katelyn's roommate, and they get along fucking horribly. They kind of hate each other all of the time, which provides great base foundation for the future where they have this toxic yuri going on, and it becomes that Ivy is the only person she can trust to communicate with about her family because they have so much hateful dirt on each other that they either have to work together or just betray each other. God I'm trying to think of how to explain Katelyn and Ivy without talking too much.

Well firstly I think it's important and definitely not projecting to write core single-sex boarding school experiences where you hate your roommate so much that you are a little bit in love with them. I will have to do a separate post talking about Ivy at some people if anyone's interested. On a surface level, they effortlessly grind each other's gears in a way that no one else can. Pure negative vibes. Ivy is relentless obsessive energy in a way that grates on Katelyn's ears specifically - Katelyn's passive aggressive silences and snarky comments are designed specifically to piss Ivy off. They fight constantly, to the point that it's so familiar that it's welcomed. Katelyn often remarks that she has never met someone so annoying; Ivy would say the same about her, despite the fact that they have such starkly different personalities. But at the same time they endure each other - Ivy dyes Katelyn's hair and she never stops after that day. Katelyn looks out for her and undergoes a well-needed arc, just as Garroth has to, about their privilege. Ivy's obsession with the boys (and specifically Garroth) serves to alienate Katelyn as she struggles to place a name to the feeling of liking women (a gut feeling provoked additionally by the paintings of Menphia hung in the academy, if you've read Loverman).

I also included her relationship with Ivy early cause it's a really strong introduction to their future arcs. Ivy mentions off-handedly a couple of times these 'conspiracy theories' - and some of them truly are conspiracies, but others have foundation - things like O'Khasis planning to reinstate monarchy + rebellion against the Ro'meaves spreading throughout the city, even things like dissent in Tu'la - all of these things fed to her by her parents, but still challenge how Katelyn sees her home. I'll have to find the screenshots where I talked about it before, that Ivy is from a struggling small town forcibly taken into O'Khasis Alliance and has a very strong hatred of O'Khasis only to later be drawn into its luxuries and sticks incredibly close to Zane. She has a reverse arc of Katelyn, who on the contrary grows up being proud of her home but then later becomes disconnected from it. Life in the Jury is so competitive that they literally are put at each other's throats to vy for Zane's attention. They are bound together, but never exactly enemies, but never friends either. Hateful toxic yuri who have to stick together for their own benefit. Ivy keeps watch over Katelyn's family (half of which being rebels + fake their own deaths in order to hide) when she is away in Phoenix Drop. In return, Katelyn fights hard to save her life in the future. She and Ivy, as well as both of their families, are strongly interwoven with the future of O'Khasis and the Jury. Post-timeskip, they have a lot to do with those rebel rumours and Tu'la.

Jeffory.

I've written so much already I am so sorry. Jeffory is a little simpler than Ivy thank god. The reason that their relationship is so strong in the academy is literally just because I want them as closely bonded as possible. I want them to have years of friendship and sexual tension under their belt. I want it to hurt so horrifically when he dies. I want her to have to bandage up a wound that keeps on overflowing despite her best efforts, one that never stops bleeding because he is quite literally an organ inside her that she needs to live. He is her first friend at the academy and quite literally the kindest person that she has ever met. She is so fucking filled with guilt over Jeffory - not just his death, but how his life changed for the worse because he met her. Despite being standoffish and cautious (think of a puffed up stray cat showing teeth to try and protect itself), he shows her complete innocent kindness. It never breaks throughout their time at the academy - even when he is bullied relentlessly, he remains golden of heart, and sticks up for her. They are incredibly close. Sexual tension isn't really the correct word. It feels like they were holding their breath for their entire lives but the release never quite came to fruition. Their friendship was so whole and pure that it just felt like it should have been a natural next step. They were best friends and they were in love with each other for years but neither of them were ever ready.

Jeffory was very much the One good thing in Katelyn's life. If she had anything, she had him. That's why it's so important for them to meet so early in Guard Academy, to be each other's first true real friends. Good enough friends for him to refuse to go back to Bright Port just to be able to stay with her in O'Khasis. He fell for her first, very early, but when she fell for him I think she was very scared. They've kissed but never slept together. By the time she had come to terms with her feelings, he was head over heels for a darling woman he met at a tavern, and that was that! She loved him enough to support him completely. She loved him! She helped to raise Abby, like, god. That's why its so important that Katelyn has Abby in Loverman. Because she was her father's everything but that little girl still looks like her mother, a constant reminder of not only Jeffory's death, but his marriage (that you kind of accidentally assisted in breaking, by the way!). How do you even live with that. Well you don't, actually, you become the weapon that your master wants to make of you and you start blindly swinging as if that will bring him back. Jeffory is literally the symbol of a golden heart, precious purity and righteousness, and she did everything wrong. He was everything right in her world, and when he died, his "ghost" becomes a constant presence haunting her, chastising her for every violence committed for Zane's sake. She is wholly consumed with this fool's assassination mission, because if its an act of revenge and its someone else's fault, then she can't blame herself for his death anymore.

(Reluctant to fully explain everything seeing as there's so much I haven't written in Loverman yet but I'm definitely willing to talk more about their relationship if prompted!)

So yeah. It's important to me that they meet as children and grow up together. It makes his death all the more tragic and upsetting for her, and his 'goodness' kind of forces her to confront the worst parts of herself. Of which there is so much of.

Future Arcs

I've already briefly mentioned Katelyn's involvement with rebels and that she and Ivy have plans to do with O'Khasis/Jury/Tu'la post-timeskip, so I won't say much more on those until I've actually brainstormed them out fully. Those are probably the most concrete future arcs I have for Katelyn, but there's one other big change I made with significance that I wanna yap about.

MAGICK. Honestly giving Katelyn fire magick I think was one of my best decisions and I don't really know fully where it came from, just that I wanted it. Partially, it was for her to be Aphiah's teacher and for them to study both of their magicks together. In another way, it's a very literal/visual way to address Katelyn's anger. It's a literal take on her title as the Fire Fist, in which people only think that her hits produce sparks, but in reality it is fire. It provides a good contrast with a number of characters, like Abby who is implied to inherit a similar power from her mother, aforementioned Aph, and also separates her a little from Garroth in terms of raw talent. It is unpredictable and took her years to be able to control it to the point of safely wielding in battle, and even so has to use gloves + weapons to contain it. It reacts actively to Aph's magicks. It serves as a rough patch during Guard Academy where she has a very self-isolating Frozen-type arc where she is afraid to hurt anyone, and even injures Jeffory just because she got too happy with him. It's a cruel thing, that forces her to be stiff and unfeeling because any energetic emotion, anger or excitement, will start a fire, especially during hormonal teenage years. It also opens up an interesting conversation about the origin of magicks in my MCD rewrite and the certain levels of magicks. The most distrusted of which being Godspeak, the first form of magick discovered prior to the Golden Age (birth of the Divine Warriors), but also closely followed by the properties held by Katelyn and Aph, fire and light respectively, which can be used to not only heal/accelerate the growth of the land, but also to burn. Abby's would also fall under that category, that being ice that's canonically scarred Katelyn in Loverman before. So her magick is definitely a great way to talk more about that and I'm so keen to develop that further in her future arcs.

[Fun fact being that forms of Godspeak are incredibly rare, and include things like hypnosis in the form of mind control or memory-play. If that rings a bell for any other magick user :) ]

Oh my god okay I need to stop here I think I'm about to pass out sorry if any of this is worded weird I'm about to fall asleep but I suddenly got plagued with the need to answer this ask. I finally found the words. And like as always if anyone wants more clarification on a specific point they find interesting feel free to ask or even dm! You can tell I like to talk about MCD + Rewrite clearly. Have fun and god please tell me your thoughts on anything.

#minecraft diaries #mcd #aphmau #loverman #loverman rambling #katelyn the firefist #im so sorry anon i dont think you bargained for 3k of katelyn analysis when you sent that ask. nor did you expect for there to be like.#5k+ more sitting in my brain that i was like. making an effort not to yap about here #i was trying to be brief i promise #i don't think it worked though #sorry you guys this is the brand now. just yapping.#i love mcd and i love my rewrite and im tired of pretending like i dont

12 notes · View notes

ghost-proofbaby · 1 year

Text

i want everyone to know i was so brave today and that the words worded. hour 16 is nearly finished (i know that’s what you all will probably be most happy to hear)

BUT i also got a huge chunk of a few requests done plus had enough motivation to write some more on two wips for myself mainly 🥺 really felt good on the soul truly anyways

sorry byyyeee retreating back into my cave now!!

#my lil fantasy story is getting built #and there’s on 3k request that has turned into something bigger than expected #but i’m having fun with it!!!#im not setting word limits this time around so you’re all aware #if you sent in a request it would end up 500 words or it could end up 5k words #i’m just doing whatever feels write and best :-)#hailey talks too much #just wanted to also let you all know i do indeed still do the writing thing #the 3k requests are not forgotten!!!

84 notes · View notes

mildmayfoxe · 1 month

Text

ok i finished my taxes. i did owe money. wahoo!!! a real business!!!! it was less than a thousand bucks even with the fucking.... $155 i had to pay just to file which is nice but not even by that much, which means it's only going to get worse in the future. lol. it's so fucking crazy how much money i spend on this shit as like?? a hobby?? what the fuck am i doing dog!!! but at least it's done. too bad i missed the deadline for the april market i usually do bc that would've made up a good chunk of what i just had to pay but like whatever man. probably oughtta scope out some summer stuff coming up other places. i'm tempted to buy a pizza as a reward but considering i just shelled out almost one thousand dollars to the irs it's probably not a good idea. but like whats $40 in the face of that tbh. anyway great time to hit up my anniversary sale so i can pay taxes on the money you give me now next year

#chatpost #i'm glad it's over at least. now i don't need to worry about it #and like i have the money and i expected about that much so it's not like a huge shock #but like a thousand bucks is a thousand bucks man. i dont wanna spend a thousand bucks on anything.#UGH WHATEVERRRRRR!!!!!! i only made like 3k in the green so what youre gonna take a third of that away? lol #the past couple years i got a return so it was nice to have that for a little while i guess. i always owed before so i'm just back to owing #oh well.

10 notes · View notes

mattodore · 11 months

Text

60 questions with Theo | playlist, pinterest | ->

1. What’s the one thing they would save in a fire?

Theo is a collector and a bit of a hoarder, so there’d be too much he’d try to save. I really couldn’t just say one thing… but I guess he’d grab his memory journal first.

2. What’s their biggest regret?

Not being good enough. Not being lovable enough.

3. How would they fare in a zombie apocalypse?

Theo would do very well up until a point. He’s a survivor through and through, but I do think he’d burn out eventually. He could go a few years before breaking down. When he’s no longer able to repress all of his emotions, the feeling of exhaustion would weigh on him. He’d get bitten soon after, almost on purpose.

4. Where do they see themselves in five years? Ten?

Working for his father for a few decades and later taking over his father’s company. He feels a lot of dread and nausea over this.

5. What’s their most useless, weirdest, or least marketable skill?

He can wiggle his ears.

6. What are they like in the bedroom — well-rounded lover or wooden plank?

Theo is… well. More wooden plank than anything. Sorry, Theo. But, well, he normally goes for more aggressive partners who tend to take control anyway. I don’t think Theo really wants to be all there during sex… it’s one of the reasons why he normally uses before finding hook-ups… it makes him a little foggy and loose. I do think, however, that it’s a little bit different when he’s with women. In Theo’s experience, women treat him kinder… which is one of the reasons why he mostly sleeps with men. He wants affection, sure, but he’s also uncomfortable with it… he’s used to pain. With Matthias, however, this does end up changing. Maybe it’s because Matthias is gentle with him unless he’s asked for it to be rough, or because Matthias won’t fuck him when he’s using, but Theo’s more active when having sex with Matthias. Not a lot of talking, but he pulls and pushes and moves how he wants. After a while, he starts taking control and speaking more.

7. Have they committed a crime before? Which one(s)?

Theo uses drugs frequently.

8. If they were an animal, which one would they be? Which one would they think they’d be?

Theo is a pygmy rabbit or a netherland dwarf rabbit (that temperament… yeah). I think Theo would see himself as… well, a goldfish trapped in a bowl, swimming in endless circles and going nowhere.

9. Do they cheat to win or play by the rules?

Theo plays by the rules, generally speaking. If we’re talking sports, though, he does play dirty. He’s very competitive.

10. What do they fantasize about?

Comfort. A room with a door that locks and will keep him safe all night. A bed on the floor. Blinds and curtains on every window. Matthias’s arms wrapped around him so tight he can hardly breathe.

11. Who’s the most important person in their life?

I want to say Matthias, but it’s his parents. It’s hard for Theo to cut them off, even despite the abuse. I don’t think this changes to Matthias for a very, very long time.

12. What’s their ideal vacation like?

Theo can’t even imagine what a vacation would be like. I think even fantasizing about it would stress him out… he’d just think about how far behind it’d put him academically.

13. What is/was/will be their college major?

Business. Statistics and data. He doesn’t like it.

14. What’s their favorite book genre, if they enjoy reading at all?

Theo doesn’t read for pleasure very often — he has too much reading to do for school — but I think he’s always enjoyed science fiction from a very young age.

15. How would they describe themselves?

Theo wouldn’t know how to describe himself at all. He’d freeze at the question and become despondent.

16. How would others describe them?

Matthias: Lovely beyond words. Intelligent and wry. Shy, pulls away when feelings are too much or too positive. Irresistible. Anxious about things that I could make go away if he'd let me. Lashes out when he gets scared. Strong when he shouldn’t have to be. Soft when he should be hard. Too forgiving to the wrong people. Easily frustrated. Standing on the edge. Endearingly insolent. A mirrored image. Every beautiful thing. Angel. Bambi. Mała myszko.

Everett: Sometimes he makes himself so small… like an injured animal. Jumpy and skittish. But strong, too… impassive when he’s hurt. He’s hiding a lot, but you can see through the cracks sometimes. He needs help, but he won’t let anyone in.

Jordan: Stubborn and headstrong. Naïve or just reckless. Lost. Like a child.

Dutchie: Hard to get to know. Honestly couldn’t tell you much about him despite the years of friendship. Still… you wanna protect him.

Jackson: Fun to be around, y’know… for a rich kid. Troubled, though. Hard to reach. Everyone wants to get to know him better, but… he doesn’t really allow that.

Kavi: Incredibly intelligent but totally aloof. Mysterious. Nose always buried in his books. Cold.

Imani: Too good for Matthias. Sweet.

17. What’s the most ridiculous thing they’ve ever spent money on?

A large collection of delicate Fenton glass bells and assorted pieces. He collects them and stores them in an antique curio cabinet in his apartment.

18. What’s their dream job?

He doesn’t have a dream job. He just does what he’s told and expected to do, which is to work for his father.

19. How’s their financial situation?

His parents have a lot of money. He doesn’t have a job (honestly… he isn’t permitted one). He’s financially reliant on his parents.

20. Who’s their go-to person for advice?

Theo doesn’t ask for advice from anyone.

21. What’s one secret of theirs that could potentially ruin a relationship they have?

If he told his parents that he’s bisexual and interested in men they would cut him off or worse…

22. Are they a dog person or a cat person — or something else?

Theo’s never had a pet before, so I don’t even think he himself knows the answer to this. He likes Matthias’s cat well enough, but he’s never been around many dogs to really choose between the two. I think he really likes looking at fish… I’m iffy on if he’d ever actually own one, though.

23. What’s one childhood memory they’ve never forgotten?

CW for child abuse. I’m talking directly about an instance of abuse. This isn’t vague like I usually am when I talk about Theo’s trauma.

Being beaten for tracking mud onto the rug in his father’s office. His father stood him in front of a full length mirror in the hall and made him watch. If he looked away he would be struck again. If his knees buckled he would be hauled back up and hit harder. It felt like it lasted for hours. Theo had been in the gardens beforehand, an umbrella held over him by his au pair. The dwarf sunflowers had bloomed and in his excitement he pulled off a petal and barreled into the home, heading straight to his father to show him how yellow the petals were. His au pair couldn’t keep up with him, and Theo was always forgetting to take off his shoes when he came in from outside. He was very young… maybe five or six.

24. Do they have any phobias?

Open doors. Windows without curtains or blinds. Locks that aren’t sturdy. Mirrors. Older men. Authoritative figures.

25. What’s one thing they’re utterly incapable of doing without the help of someone else?

Theo is actually very independent. It’s hard to think of anything he couldn’t do himself, because he’s always been on his own, really.

26. What’s one topic they could never get tired of researching or learning about?

Theo is very intelligent, but he’s not actually that interested in learning. He lost that drive and passion at a relatively young age. He’s no longer curious. Hm… I think he might get a little thrill from learning information that’s just… completely useless. Like, think dumb trivia. Still, though… knowledge is synonymous with pressure to him. It makes him feel sick.

27. What’s their favorite genre of music?

Theo will listen to anything. I don’t think he necessarily has a favorite genre. Hm… I think he likes lullabies, though. Quiet music. Calming.

28. Who, if anyone, do they dislike most?

Himself.

29. If they could change one thing about themselves, physical or otherwise, what would it be?

Whatever would make his parents happy with him. Whatever could make him better suited for the part they want him to play.

30. What’s their political stance?

Theo is whatever his parents want him to be on paper, but politically he’s… a liberal, I guess. His party friends, in general, lean left… and they’re definitely influencing him some. However, I don’t think he has the backbone to really go any which way.

This question is a little hard for me to answer with some of the echthroi cast because they’re rich at the end of the day, ya’ know? Materially, politics don’t touch them.

31. Are they religious?

No.

32. What were they like in high school?

He was all over the place. Quiet and then having these uncontrollable outbursts. Fearful. Frequently pulled aside by teachers, being asked pointed questions. Standoffish. Flinching when touched. Far away from the other students. At the same time he was scared to be alone, though, so he would blend in with the crowds when he could. At the summer school he was sent to yearly, the outbursts always got worse.

33. What’s the worst injury they’ve ever had?

I’m going to choose not to answer this one.

34. Do they work to live or live to work?

Live to work. He doesn’t know who he’d be without it. It’s what he was molded for.

35. Do/did they want children?

No. Theo is scared of even the idea of having children.

36. What’s their favorite thing about themselves?

Nothing? I don’t know. Theo… really doesn’t like himself. Maybe his hair, though… his pierced ears… the things he feels give him autonomy.

37. What’s their favorite thing about their significant other, if they have one?

Hm. I think Theo really likes how big Matthias is. He towers over people and is visibly strong. I think that offers Theo a lot of comfort. He feels safe when Matthias is around. Matthias is also very protective, so… it makes it easier for Theo to face his fears. There’s a reliability to Matthias that Theo needs. Matthias cares about him and tells him frequently how much he loves him… Theo’s never had that before. It makes him feel lighter.

38. If they hear something go bump in the night, do they get out of bed to check it out or do they stay put?

Theo is paralyzed but his mind shoots off at a mile a minute. He’s too terrified to do anything.

39. What’s one skill they wish they had?

A photographic memory. It would make his life a lot easier with regards to his education. He’s never thought about the downsides to this… especially as someone with drug and trauma related memory loss…

40. What do other people find annoying about them, if anything?

He can be very cutting and dismissive. He's judgmental, too. First impressions are everything if you want him to even be cordial with you.

41. What do other people love most about them?

He has this magnetism to him that you can’t really put your finger on. I think it’s a combination of how handsome he is alongside the way he keeps himself almost entirely separate from everyone else… you always want what you can’t have.

42. What’s the typical first impression after meeting this person?

That he’s very prickly or just cold… restless… doleful.

43. What do people notice first about them, as far as their appearance goes?

The repressed anger and sorrow in his eyes. Then, maybe, all those beauty marks. The elegant line of his body.

44. Does this person try their best to be honest or are they not above lying to get their way?

Theo isn’t a very good liar, but he’s very good at prevarication and skirts the truth with ease.

45. What kind of movies do they like?

Theo doesn’t have time for movies. Regardless… I think he’d like horror movies. I think… Theo would find a lot of comfort in watching horrible things happen to fictional people. He could fictionalize the abuse he’s faced that way.

46. Are they the life of the party or a wallflower?

I’d say he’s a bit of a mixed bag on this one. If he’s using, he’s the life of the party. If he’s sober, he’s a wallflower. Either way, though, people will approach him to strike up conversation and ask him to dance.

47. Are they an early bird or a night owl?

Early bird. Theo doesn’t actually like the night. Does he still party until three in the morning? Yeah. But… well. Theo tortures himself in many different ways, doesn’t he?

48. Are they a good kisser?

He’s not bad at it, but he never really kissed anyone until Matthias. So… he’s not amazing at it or anything. He’s learning as he goes.

49. Do they think about what they wear or do they throw on whatever they find first?

Theo definitely plans out outfits. I think he has three separate lives he’s living and three separate fashion senses to suit each of them. He dresses very typically masculine and rich when he’s with his parents. He dresses down for university but incorporates some elements of his nightlife wardrobe on occasion. He experiments more with sexuality and gender for his nightlife fashion… I think this is what he would prefer to wear all the time, only with a less dramatic flare.

50. Do they have any insecurities?

I could be contracted to write a trilogy about Theo’s insecurities and would meet every deadline with ease. The underlying root of all of his insecurities is his belief that he’s unlovable and dirty, though. Let’s keep it simple with that.

51. What is their favorite thing about themselves?

A repeat question. I’ll add onto my last answer, though, to say that I think he has some days where he feels really good about his appearance and some days he doesn’t. He’s temperamental.

52. What’s their diet like?

Theo eats whatever is made for him and will finish all of it even if he dislikes it or isn’t hungry. He doesn’t have any favorites, but he really dislikes candy or sweets.

53. If they could only eat one thing for the rest of their life, what would it be?

Again, he doesn’t have anything in particular he likes. I guess something easy to eat would be the answer… maybe mangos.

54. What’s their body count, if they have one?

I think he has sex very regularly… on average I'd say once a week unless he’s studying too intensely for a break or his last experience was a really rough one. He doesn’t always sleep with new people, either. The faces blur, though. Hm. I can’t say an exact number and Theo wouldn’t be counting anyway.

55. Who do they look up to most?

The blurry image he has of his childhood au pair.

56. What do they smell like?

Copying things I’ve mentioned previously here… Theo smells very clean. Think green and fresh… a little powdery. He doesn’t often wear cologne, so he mostly just smells like soap — not even his body lotion is scented. He doesn’t like strong or chemical smells on himself. As a signature he’d wear a spritz of Francis Kurkdjian’s Aqua Universalis. However, Theo will also wear Gucci’s Tears from the Moon, which was a gift from his mother, if he’s at family events — it’s outside of his preference but that’s neither here nor there.

57. How do they feel about drugs?

…Theo is an addict. He doesn’t get clean for a few years and relapses multiple times. He relies on them but he also wishes he’d never touched them sometimes, usually when the guilt floods in after he’s sobered up from one of the outbursts he’s had because of them.

58. If they could change one thing about their life, what would it be?

Hm. I’m going to bow out of answering this question as well.

59. What motivates them?

A desire for recognition, acceptance, and love.

60. What are some of their simple pleasures?

Collecting knickknacks. Cold showers. The wind whipping through his hair when he sticks his head out of the window of a car. The sound of the windchimes outside his bedroom window. Odious purring on his chest. Matthias’s voice in his ear.

#river dipping #ts4 #theodore doe #echthroi #oc extras #a burning house to live in #s: echthroi #cw child abuse mention #for this cw i wanna be clear that i talk specifics of an incident for one question (i also give another warning for it before the answer)#cw drugs mention #really out here blogging just for myself bc seriously who's reading this except me #it's nearly 3k words in google docs... what can i say 😌#theo... my little guy.....................#i looped his playlist the entire time i was answering these questions for him so i was bouncing off the walls #i honestly always want to do the ask games i see on here but my avpd kicks my ass so when i saw this one the other day i was like #why don't i just answer all of the questions and post 'em to the extras tag without the actual ask element #it was a lot of fun and also kind of agonizing....... honestly i might do this again if i see another ask game that interests me #also revealed the third nickname matthias regularly calls theo... i think it's obvious why someone like him would call theo that gkfhjfnh #pointing to hierophant by king woman in matthias's playlist like . what else did we expect #okay....... onto rereading matthias's answers and then i'll post that one and go back to catching up #updating the pic of theo from this WEEKS later bc i can't believe i let theo's hairline look like that............ anyway

48 notes · View notes

tommarvoloriddlesdiary · 1 year

Note

Darling can you please do

[ same age AU, Budding Dark Lord, Oblivious Harry,]

no:10 [ stop staring at him ]

With Tom Riddle looking at Harry with burning hate and loathing but to everyone else it seems he's in completely love with harry and adores him

(Basically a simp) when tom does get to know this he's affronted and in shock then the slow realization sets in that he truly does feel something for Harry , after all.

LOVE AND HATE DOES HAVE A THIN LINE .

i would love to! this was a blast, though i got a bit carried away. even more so than the last prompt 😅 and this cuts off a bit abruptly because if i had kept it going it would have been triple the length 😬 i really hope you enjoy this! and if anyone else wants to send a prompt, please feel free. you can make your own or pick from here.

“Oh no.”

Tom looked up from Draco’s copy of the Daily Prophet. Pansy had drawled the words with a derision she only saved for two things in this world; One: A new Witch Weekly fashion trend that simply wouldn’t do. And Two: Harry Potter.

Breakfast was well underway. The clattering and chattering of students digging in and delighting in the first Hogsmeade weekend of the school year had the hall alight with feverous energy. The excitement to spend the day ransacking the little wizarding village and breaking away from the now monotonous daily life that Hogwarts provided always seemed to spur on the mischievous and untoward.

Tom glanced at Pansy’s hands (holding nothing save for a fork she clutched tightly) and at the table before her (displaying simply her morning meal) and concluded that there were no Witch Weekly fashion trends to bemoan. Which meant somewhere (and more than likely too close), Harry Potter was within sight.

“Just one morning,” Pansy muttered. “Just one Merlin damned morning. That’s all I want. Some Morgana blessed peace and quiet.”

If what he thought was happening was happening, then Tom would have to agree. And if he were a lesser man, he would nod slowly in commiseration.

“Prefects Riddle and Parkinson,” Hermione Granger called from just behind Tom, her voice polite and inquiring. Her timing impeccable. “Good morning.”

Pansy’s grip on her fork somehow grew tighter, leaving her hands impressively pale. Tom carefully shifted around to look up and over his shoulder; his eyes barely met Granger’s before landing on Potter’s.

Tom did not like Harry Potter. He constantly felt like he was on eggshells around him, especially after that incident two years ago. Potter hadn’t said anything at the time, but Tom was just waiting for the other shoe to drop. He hadn’t taken Potter as someone who would hold his cards close until the right possible moment, but he always seemed to surprise Tom in unexpected ways. Potter was a living, breathing menace.

“Prefects Potter and Granger,” Tom’s voice was smooth and quiet under the noise of the hall. “To what do we owe the visit?”

Tom could make a few educated guesses. Although, it was rare for any Gryffindor Prefects to make their way over to Slytherin territory. They tended to avoid crossing the hall like the plague, feeling much safer and stronger when approached versus approaching. Very un-lion like, if one were to ask Tom. So, with such a rare occurrence, it was more than likely that a professor had requested something of them.

Granger cleared her throat, and Tom stopped glaring at Potter long enough to acknowledge her properly. “Professor McGonagall requested that we pair off for Hogsmeade duties. Given Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw’s poor handling of last year’s final weekend, she suggests we divide our pairs with one prefect from each house.”

Suggests, in McGonagall’s speech, typically meant insists. Pansy clearly caught on to this as well because she protested vehemently, swinging her fork like a weapon, “There is no way I’m going to waste my Hogsmeade weekend patrolling it with one of you two Gryffindorks! I’d rather take a bombarda to the face!”

And though Pansy was often times overdramatic to a fault, Tom could see the appeal of that. With her by-the-book attitude, Granger would ideally be a good fit for Tom’s Prefect Persona, but they often butted heads over the most minor things. Tom’s goals were always self-oriented, and when presented with a good enough bribe resulting in excellent blackmail or a chance to have someone ingratiated with him, he would almost always rather that than hand out proper punishment. He couldn’t do that with Granger hovering around. And Potter was Potter.

Potter’s brows rose at Pansy’s little teardown, “Parkinson, you would have had to patrol no matter what. If that means by yourself or with one of us, what’s the big difference?”

“The big difference?! Obviously, just being near you two breaks me out into hives—“

Granger interrupted with a put-out sigh, “It’s just for the morning! Until we are relieved by Macmillan, Abbott, Goldstein, and Patil during lunch, it’s not like we’re spending all day together.”

“Yeah, Parkinson,” Potter smiled teasingly, “It’s not like you’re going on a date with us.”

Tom glanced back at Pansy when she didn’t respond with scathing and cruel words as he had expected. Instead, she was bright red and nearly vibrating with anger. Tom nodded once, “If Professor McGonagall expects this of us, we’ll do it.”

And when Pansy opened her mouth, no doubt to protest further, Tom frowned slightly and watched as she immediately snapped her mouth shut, going pale again. “Right. Yes, of course. Tom is right, obviously.”

“There,” Tom dawned his most charming and careless grin, “it’s settled, then.” He paused, considering. Granger would be a hassle to patrol with, and Potter is someone Tom wants to choke to death, but maybe there was a way to turn this inconvenience into an opportunity.

If he could get something on Potter, something of equal value to what Potter had on Tom, then perhaps he could gain an edge, and they would, at the very least, be at a stalemate. So, Tom continued, “Granger, why don’t you and Pansy patrol the north end of Hogsmeade while Potter and I take the south? We’ll meet in the middle by lunch and wait for our replacements.”

Tom watched Granger and Potter share a glance that spoke of too many things and nothing all at once. He could make out a healthy dose of confusion and surprise, but there was a long history of shared glances and a secret language that Tom wasn’t privy to that kept him out of the loop.

“Sure,” Potter nodded and replied for her. He looked back at Tom and smiled softly, “Let us know when you’re done with breakfast.” And Tom couldn’t help but think that Potter should wear a bag over his head. To hide his ugly scheming face from the world, of course.

Tom’s answering smile was strained but enough for Granger and Potter to take their leave. He turned back in his seat to find Pansy’s head buried in her arms and her plate pushed away but not far enough for a few strands of her dark hair to be spared of egg yolk.

“How could you do this to us, Tom?” Pansy muffled into her sleeves, sounding stricken and betrayed.

“Pull yourself together, Parkinson. You can make nice with Granger for one morning.”

She peered over her arms and glared. Tom watched her hesitate, debating her next words before she threw caution to the wind and mumbled, “I’m sure you’ll just love making nice with Potter.”

Tom was ready to dismiss the comment, but there was something about the implications and her undertone that made him pause. Before he could ask, Draco fell into the seat beside him, “Was that Potter and Granger I saw walking away from the table? What did they want?”

Pansy shot up, overjoyed to have someone to rant further with. “They wanted to ruin the peace and sanctity of MY precious Hogsmeade weekend, of course! Tom and I have to patrol in pairs with them because McGonagall clearly has a death wish for her little Gryffindors.”

“What,” Draco scoffed. “Absolutely not. Tell me you said no.”

“I didn’t have a choice. Tom agreed for us.”

Tom sighed, “Say it with any more resentment, Pansy dear, and I’ll think you’re truly upset with me. You act like this is how I wished to spend the day.” And that was another worry; Tom pondered while Draco tried to steal his Prophet back from Tom’s grip. He did have errands to run in Hogsmeade today, and he doubted Potter would be willing to tag along. Even if Tom went about his business casually, Potter might still catch on to what he was planning with the items he needed, which was far too great a risk.

Pansy whined, “How can I believe you when you threw me to Granger faster than Potter can catch a snitch?”

Draco dropped his hand and whipped his head from Pansy to Tom twice over. “Oh, Merlin. Is it happening? Is it finally happening?”

“Don’t act so excited, Draco,” Pansy sniffed, “It’s happening at my expense. I am a casualty in this.”

Tom’s brows furrowed for a moment. Was he missing something? “Is what happening?”

“You’re finally confessing your love for Potter,” Draco and Pansy announced in jarring unison. They said it like it was a fact, like it was obvious.

Tom, blindsided, could only say, “What?”

“You’ve been obsessed with him for years,” Draco carried on, as-you-please. “You stare at him all the time, sit near him during classes, and partner with him during Defence practicals,” He listed off all of Tom’s alleged habits one by one on his fingers, “You mutter about him constantly—I sometimes catch you doing it when you sleep—and whenever he finds a good enough reason to ask you something, you bend over backwards to comply.”

Tom did no such thing. That is ridiculous. So, he said as much, “That is ridiculous. I do no such thing.”

Pansy rolled her eyes, “You’re ridiculous.”

Tom’s answering glare was enough to turn a man to stone and Pansy to a quick escape. “Anyway!” She shouted, “Let’s just get going! We’ll grab Potter and Granger and make our way to the village.” She muttered at the end, “I’m sure this won’t be awkward at all.”

She jumped out of her seat and walked to the end of the table to wait for Tom with a surprising amount of patience. Draco just shook his head and sighed, “And here I thought you were making some progress.”

Tom turned slowly to look at Draco head-on. He smiled a perfectly pleasant and sinister thing, “Draco. It would be wise not to let your mouth undo the years of work you’ve done to prove your usefulness.” He stood up and carefully folded the Prophet, finally passing it back.

Draco accepted it green-faced and wide-eyed, “I’ll be mindful of that.”

“Excellent.” Tom excused himself and followed Pansy to the Gryffindor table. He couldn’t believe she and Draco thought Potter was someone Tom was…infatuated with. How could they not see Tom’s apparent disdain and loathing for him? How could they mistake Tom’s clearly coerced actions in an attempt to keep Potter from revealing Tom’s secret for some misguided want to please him?

What was there to like about Potter anyway? Tom wondered as Pansy said, “Chop chop! Let’s go, losers. Breakfast is over, and I don’t want to get trampled by the morning rush down to the village.”

The Gryffindors around Granger and Potter all looked at their housemates with various forms of pity. Then, Weasley laughed, “Yeah, Parkinson. No one would want that.” And his sarcasm was met with poorly muffled giggles.

“Ron,” Granger chastised and stood along with Potter. “Yes, yes. Let’s go. We have to make sure the third-years don’t wander.”

Granger naturally kept a quick pace, leaving Tom, Potter, and Pansy trailing after her. Pansy dragged her feet so she lingered even further behind, and Tom carefully kept stride with Potter while they all walked out of the Great Hall.

Tom took in Potter’s face with a close inspection. He supposed his earlier remarks of Potter’s ugliness weren’t exactly founded. Objectively, Potter had a sort of boyish handsomeness. Not at all like Tom’s more classic handsome with features sharp and forever in vogue. No, Potter was a little softer. A strong jaw without it being cutting, pronounced but not overly so cheekbones, a long mouth and full lips that were in a perpetual state of dryness…

Tom felt an odd stirring in his chest and disregarded it.

So. Potter wasn’t ugly. His dark hair and green eyes indeed lent a hand as well. Tom supposed that was something to like about Potter. Objectively. Subjectively for some, but not for Tom.

When Tom tore his eyes away from Potter to glance at their other two companions, Pansy’s look of utter despair and Granger’s quiet amusement felt like an omen. And when they reached the main doors, the brisk autumn air greeted them with an overbearing familiarity.

Potter hunched his shoulders at the cold, smiling. “Chilly today,” he said.

Granger sighed like an overworked mother of two and started rifling through her beaded bag. She frowned when it became apparent that whatever she sought wasn’t there, “Oh. Sorry, Harry. I thought I brought a scarf, but I must have left it in the dormitory.”

“It’s alright, Hermio-“ Potter cut himself off and glanced down at his hands in surprise.

Tom tucked away his wand and carelessly continued walking. “We’re wizards; I do hope you remember.”

Pansy snorted inelegantly and jogged lightly to catch up to Tom. She gave him an impressed look and two thumbs up before damning herself to hell for all eternity, “Nice one, Tom. Potter’s bound to fancy you back with all the suave chivalry.”

Behind them, Tom could hear Potter and Granger exchanging soft words. “Pansy. Stop talking,” he hissed. This was getting absurd.

Pansy shrugged but walked silently down to Hogsmeade for the rest of their journey. And when it was time to split apart, Granger and Pansy waving—or, rather, flipping them off from Pansy—as they set off to the northern parts of the village, the leftover silence between Tom and Potter turned…awkward.

That was the only word Tom could describe it with. Awkward. He immediately cursed Pansy for jinxing it earlier. Tom was decidedly never awkward about anything, having drilled out any sort of gracelessness or inconvenient feelings long ago. But after briefly exploring Potter’s objective handsomeness, suddenly being alone with him felt awkward.

“So, Riddle,” Potter began, saving them from the disquiet, “how’s your start of term been going?”

Tom had no idea where Potter was going with this and felt on edge. But he responded, “Well. And yours?”

“Yeah, no, it’s been good,” Potter nodded a little too quickly. His lashes fluttered with his roaming eyes. Eyes that were looking anywhere and everywhere except at Tom.

Potter had a small beauty mark at the curl of his jaw just beside his—

Stop staring at him. Tom reprimanded his own eyes. Once again catching himself paying too close attention to Potter’s face. He focused on surveying the village.

Their patrolling took them through the sparse beginnings of the morning Hogsmeade rush; the laughter of students and carefree happiness of the townsfolk provided a charming scene to the golden autumn backdrop. Tom was struck with the realisation that his goal of finding Potter’s secrets wouldn’t be met if they continued on silent—but…there was something rather companionable about all of this.

And now that Tom was spiralling down that thought path, he was caught off guard by how simply…nice…this was. He had thought Potter would be annoying, rambunctious, and generally disagreeable, but the reality turned out to be quite the opposite. Potter’s quiet enjoyment of their surroundings was like a magnet, and Tom felt himself slowly gravitating towards it.

“Riddle, do you mind if we stop by Honeydukes?” Potter asked, perking up at the sight of the sweet shop just ahead.

Tom was ready to disagree, not because he didn’t want Potter to shop—actually, it would be a great benefit if Potter did shop, just so Tom could suggest they go to some of the places he wanted to visit as well—but because he didn’t want to deal with the large crowds of students intending to stockpile their sweets to last until the next Hogsmeade weekend. Tom supposed this is what he got for finding pleasure in another’s company.

But while Tom was still weighing the pros and cons of saying yes, they had already arrived, and Potter had taken his silence as consent, entering the shop with practised ease. Evading crowding bodies left and right. Tom sighed and followed carefully, having decided he’d rather have Potter nearby and within sight than the opposite.

Potter selected a few candies, prattling on about who preferred what from his little group of friends. It only occurred to Tom that Potter hadn’t seemed to be getting anything for himself when Potter had asked, “Would you like anything?”

Tom blinked twice in quick succession, “Pardon?”

“Do you have a favourite sweet? Anything you’d like?”

Did…did Tom have a favourite sweet? Was Potter being serious? “Why?”

“Just offering,” Potter shrugged but waited. He stared at Tom with a ready patience. It seemed as though Tom would be answering, or they would be trapped here forever.

This is another thing, Tom thought, that one could possibly like about Potter. He was alarmingly kind towards others. Offering, gifting, teaching, helping—Tom had seen Potter do all these things and more. Yet, Tom had dismissed it as a weakness, a foolish pandering that made Potter less than.

But held in the steady gaze Potter had laid upon him, Tom felt that, if it truly were a weakness, Potter wouldn’t look so strong and self-assured at this moment. An answer slipped out of Tom unbidden, “White Chocolate Skulls.”

Potter’s face turned fascinated, his eyes widened behind his wireframes, and his mouth fell open ever so slightly. “White Chocolate Skulls? Riddle, do you have a sweet tooth?”

Tom nearly bristled, “I do not have a sweet tooth.”

“I beg to differ,” Potter smiled like he was holding back a laugh. “White chocolate is the sweetest chocolate they make,” he shook his head and continued, walking further into the shop and towards the Skulls, “I really would’ve pegged you as a Licorice Snap kinda guy.”

Tom made a face, and Potter caught the look and couldn’t hold himself back any longer. His pearling laughter caused a few heads to turn, and Tom strung tight like a bow at the sudden urge to smuggle Potter away, to keep his laughter only for Tom’s ears—

Tom paused. That was a strong reaction. He breathed through it while he picked apart what exactly was going on.

Did he like Potter? Did Tom like him enough to want to keep Potter all to himself? And had he been so obvious that Pansy and Draco had known for years and he hadn’t?

Tom had an unsettling feeling that this could all be traced back to the incident from two years ago and refused to look any further into it.

#tomarry #tomarrymort #harrymort #pov: tom #my fic #3k words #prompt ask #this went everywhere and nowhere #i really might come back to it #finish it up and post it on ao3 maybe?#maybe i should make a series on ao3 for the prompt asks #i am once again unsure if this will meet expectations 😭#but there are a lot of silly lines that make me laugh in this one

120 notes · View notes