went to barnes and noble yesterday and had the silliest little experience of seeing a sign over a table filled with mandalorian memorabilia that read “everyone’s favorite daddy is back at it again” 10/10 experience would love to see it again

forever anticipating

“hi i don't know if your requests are open but if they are can you write an scenario in which hyunsuk sets jihoon and y/n on a blind date? fluffy? btw do you think he would kiss on the first date?”

aww anonie this is the cutest request! time for some SOFT JIHOON HOURS!  To answer your question, I think Jihoon is highly intuitive and can read body language well so he will use that to inform his decision whether or not to go for the kiss! If his date is down, he will not hesitate. I hope you enjoy the direction I took :) lmk what you think!! 💓

This is how Jihoon secretly looks at you when you aren’t looking during your date. gif credit goes to @khaly-no​

Treasure Jihoon x Y/N

warnings: none, this FLUFFY

word count: 1.8k

— the dorms —

Video game night was in full swing and it has never been louder in the dorms. Jeongwoo screeched over the sound of six other members’ simultaneous bickering. Meanwhile, Asahi decided now was the perfect time hit whoever blinked with a couch pillow. Normally, Hyunsuk wouldn’t have tolerated this level of rowdiness under his roof. But he was busy. He sat quietly on the far end of the sofa tapping furiously into his phone, a sly smile plastered across his features.

“Hey, Jihoon—oh my god,” Hyunsuk said, his smile melting as soon as he looked up. The chaos activated his leader (mother) mode. “Jihoon-Jeongwoo get down. Jeongwoo, please. Haruto, wait--Junkyu-Junkyu- ASAHI”

Asahi stopped. The rest followed suit.

The room turned to normal levels of volume, and Hyunsuk was able to try again. 

“Jihoon, come here.” Jihoon perked up from his Mashiho impersonation, and got up to join Hyunsuk.

“Bro, you should join us. Junghwan is killing it, you don’t want to miss his true maknae on top moment.” (He’s actually not, the beloved super king cow king baby is getting crushed by Haruto every round). Jihoon slid next to Hyunsuk, glancing at his phone screen. “What are you...”

Hyunsuk flashed him a cheeky smile and hid what he was working on for the past half hour.

“You’re going on a blind date tomorrow.”

“No way, this feels somewhat illegal. Tell me more.”

“Her name is y/n and I met her through a mutual friend. They go to uni together and we met at that hangout I went to last weekend. Park Jun, she is exactly your type. You gotta trust me on this one.”

Jihoon blinked at him, for once without a witty remark. Jihoon squinted at Hyunsuk, and chuckled in disbelief. Reality was hitting him and logic does not like that shit eating grin on Hyunsuk’s face.

“Hyunsuk, you’re setting me up? You, really? This is actually happening? Right before our flight to Japan?”

“Yeah. Tomorrow early morning at the Han River. You’ll have a few hours before we head over to Incheon.” 

Jihoon ruffled his hair and sat back into the couch. He sucked in a breath. Hyunsuk frowned, “you don’t want to? Sorry man, I really thought your vibes would’ve matched and-“

“Oh no no, hyung, I’m just...worried since we’re going to promote in Japan for the next two weeks and our schedules are so busy. It might end up hurting us both,” Jihoon confessed. “And it’s been forever since I last been on a date.”

“Nah I think you’re worrying way too much in advance. The policy is chill now and, hey, who can say no to waiting a few weeks for those abs,” Hyunsuk reassured. 

“Oh right, I’m going to flash my abs the fifth minute in,” Jihoon said sarcastically. He did make a mental note, though, because if you really are that cute? He’ll need that Plan G.

“Here, I’ll text you the address now. You better not flake and make me look bad.”

“HEY! What are you guys WHISPERING about!” Jeongwoo said, looking at them suspiciously. Simultaneously, the nonactive players of the game whipped their heads to stare at the pair.

“Nothing, the grownups are talking” Jihoon joked, dramatically nodding and shooting thumbs up at Hyunsuk. Jihoon left the resulting hysterics and sound of Hyunsuk cackling behind for the comforts of his room where he checked his buzzing phone. Turns out, Hyunsuk had attached the pictures of you, figuring he would give Jihoon that peace of mind (and a way to find you tomorrow) under the instructions.

Holy shit. 

Jihoon eyes widened. You are exactly his type. Jihoon couldn’t stop staring at your smiling features. The soft smile that colored his features never left his face for the rest of the night.

He couldn’t wait.

— Han River —

Wow ok, this is slightly worse than evaluation days, Jihoon decided, nervously kicking a small pebble around on the dusty road.

“Hey, Jihoon?”

Jihoon froze for a millisecond and turned around to face you.

You looked ethereal in the early morning sun. The light reflected off your lovely features, illuminating the kind glow of your smile. Jihoon made another mental note to treat Hyunsuk to dinner once they land in Japan.

“The one and only. Y/n?”

“Yes,” you nodded shyly. “It’s nice to meet you, Jihoon.”

Jihoon loved hearing his name coming from your lips. Which were so pretty and pink and—

Jihoon cleared his throat. “Likewise.” After a small pause, “Is there anything you would like to do in particular while we get to know each other?”

You laughed, the sound music to Jihoon’s ears. He wants to hear that all the time now, he decided.

“I actually really like taking pictures of random beautiful things that pique my interest! Maybe we can just go for a walk and explore what we find beautiful about the Han River?”

“Perfect,” Jihoon smiled widely, which somehow grew when he noticed the blush in your cheeks.

And that’s how you two somehow went from exchanging detailed introductions to sharing hobbies to discussing life goals and values, all while snapping amazing scenery pics. This developed into a made up game of taking the best picture, judged entire on a subjective and nondemocratic point system. The winner gets uncontested glory and a copy of all the photos of the loser’s captured moments. 

“HAHA, y/n I just got the spiciest photo of these golden bell flowers over this ledge!”

“What, how??” You whipped around from trying to make some daisies look aesthetic. The competitive side of you was taking over.

“I guess it’s one of the perks of being taller,” Jihoon said, hopping down the said six foot tall ledge he spent the last few minutes scaling. He dusted his pants off carefully and flashed you his eye smile. In a singsong voice, he said, “and one of those perks is winning this game~”

Yeah you were not about to risk a broken arm for that picture. “Okay, fine, but show it to me?”

“Nuh uh.” He flashed you the picture in one second bursts, having the best time teasing you.

Jihoon paused. He got so comfortable with you in the last hour that he just teased you like he does with the other Treasure members. His worries were interrupted at the adorable sight of you giggling. He internally sighed of relief.

“NuH uH,” you mimicked backed at him, reaching for his phone. 

Jihoon quickly yanked his phone above his head, dramatically leaned his body so it was out of your reach. Surprised, you tried to change course. But in the spur of the moment, the momentum carried you just a tad too far. You bump slightly into his chest. Jihoon instinctively grabbed at you to prevent you from losing your balance further, his hands falling on your waist. His large hands felt so warm through the fabric, his breath brushing as the top of your forehead. You were so close.

His eyes widened, heat rushing to his cheeks. For a second, your eyes meet. You wonder if he can hear the thundering in your chest.

Jihoon quickly let go and took a step back, slightly bowing at you. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to grab you like that!”

You could tell your face was absolutely flushed at this point, but you made a show of brushing off your outfit and stuck your nose in the air, “as long as you don’t have cooties.”

“Ooh,” Jihoon winced. “I definitely do. Exclusive, premium, limited edition cooties.”

You laughed, thankful he didn’t press you on the obvious blush. Although it’s not like his face was any better.

“Hey, y/n,” Jihoon said, pulling you out of your internal monologue. “This might be about it for the date. My phone has actually been blowing up with reminders to get back.”

Oh, You tried to hide the sadness in your face. The few hours you spent together seemed to fly by so fast, and you definitely longed for more. Within the span of the date, he showed just how incredible he is—unyielding dedication to his dreams, selfless outlooks on life, and a kind, hilarious and loving personality that felt like sunshine on a rainy day.

Jihoon noticed the quiet pause, and softly asked, “May I walk you home?”

You let out an airy laugh. “Not unless you want to walk 45 minutes in one direction and an hour in the other, Park Jihoon. It’s okay, I’ll take the subway!”

“Right, right,” Jihoon chuckled. You guys reached an intersection leading pedestrians away from the river sidewalk. The signs pointed to your destinations in opposite directions, which felt too meta for your taste.

Jihoon turned to face you.

“You know, golden bell flowers means anticipation in flower language.” He looked the most serious he has ever been all morning.

You mustered yourself to look into his eyes.

“That’s suitable, Jihoon, because I anticipate for you to call me as soon as you safely land and are available.”

“Deal.”

Numbers and addresses (for postcards, he claims) were exchanged.

“Jihoon, I had an amazing time today.” You said, suddenly feeling shy again. A part of you wished you could walk him back, but that would attract unwanted attention.

“Me too, y/n. Thanks for waking up so early to spend all this time with me.” Jihoon said, the tone of his voice so soft and genuine.

He shifted a little closer, eyes flickering to your lips. 

Your eyes widened. 

He leaned in and gently rested his hand against the back of your head. His eyes searched yours, asking.

Oh my god, yes please. You drew even closer in answer, eyes fluttering shut. 

Jihoon closed the distance. His lips gently pressed into yours, completing a perfect puzzle. The kiss was was warm, sweet and heartfelt. Your lips gently moved against each other, before you pulled slightly away for air. As your foreheads rested against each together, a warm wave unfurled in your chest.

Just a little more, you thought. Jihoon seemed to agree as you both lean in again, this time the kiss far less hesitant. Your hands rest against his chest while he cups your face with his. Jihoon pulled back, pushing a strand of hair behind your ears. His phone was aggressively ringing, you realize.

“I’ll see you, y/n.”

“I’ll anticipate you, Jihoon.”

He watched your retreating figure for a bit before he headed back to the dorm, giddy with joy.

— your home —

A few days later, a package arrived. It was from Jihoon. Your heart raced. 

He never mentioned anything about this in his calls, you excitedly thought. 

You slowly pulled out the contents, marveling at each one. A picture of the Han River reflecting the morning light. A dozen of printed photos he somehow took of you that day (you laughing at something you took, looking off into the river, and crouching over vegetation). A polaroid of him in the hotel room, “you better be missing me so damn hard” it captioned. You chuckled, touched by his gift. 

You were about to close the envelope until you realized there’s still one item left. You reached in. And you gasped.

A golden bell flower, pressed by hand. 

BTS Reaction #4- Love At First Sight

HOSEOK-  “I’ll be out in a second!”  You called out to the front of the shop as you heard the bell ring that told you a new costumer just entered.  

  You eyed the pot in front of you and nodded to yourself.  It looked like enough soil, so you smiled and took off your gardening gloves.  You headed to the front counter, where a smaller yet older lady stood by, eyeing the place with a secretive grin on her face.  

  “How may I help you ma’am?”  You asked politely.  She smiled at you and gestured to all the flowers by the huge bay window.

  “Do you offer flower delivery?”  She asked.  

  “Of course.  Most of our flowers are delivered with a note though.  Do you have one with you?”  You told her.

  “Well, my son’s birthday is next week and I have the card.  I just don’t know what kind of flowers I should send with it.”  She hummed thoughtfully as she gazed around the shop.

  “Roses seem to be a costumer favorite, however poppies are in season and we have a few out back.”  You answered blandly.  Your boss was always telling you to push the roses and poppies, since they were the most expensive.  Personally, you thought they were over-rated.

  “Hmm...what do you think?”  

  “If you don’t mind me suggesting, I would think our white and yellow daisy bouquet would be nice.  White is for purity and innocent love, while the yellow stands for luck and good health.”  You advised her carefully while eyeing the flowers.  

  She seemed to think about this for a bit, before nodding and handing you a birthday card.  

“So how much will that be?”

.....

  It has been four days since the lady came in for the bouquet of flowers for her son.  Today was the day that the flowers would be delivered and you quietly made sure the arrangement was in order, cutting off any last minute thorns.  

 “Hey, (y/n)!”  You boss yelled out from his office.  You stalked forward ended up at his doorway.  

  “Yes Sir?”

  “The delivery man just broke his ankle.  I’m going to need you to due all the deliveries today.”  You let out a deep sigh as you noticed the weather outside get gloomier and gloomier.  

  “Okay sir.”

....

  You ended up in front of a factory like place.  The address you got lead you here and you wondered if this son worked as a factory worker.  You hurriedly skipped to the entrance as you felt rain began to trickle down from the sky.

  The factory was empty and instead filled with many people running around with lights, cameras, makeup and outfits.    Suddenly, a lady holding seven cups of coffee bumped into you.  

  “Um, excuse me, where can I find a Hoseok?”  You asked.

  “He should be done with his photo shoot right about now.”  She gestured over to a corner of the factory that held a table with food. Photo shoot?  You followed her direction and saw a tall man standing by it, stuffing a rice cake into his mouth.  You guesses this was Hoseok, as there was no one else there.

“Umm...Happy Birthday?”

He turned around and looked at you with wide and glossy eyes.  In shock of you, his jaw dropped as a rice cake fell from his mouth.  

  Years later, Hoseok would swear to god he thought an angel was delivering him flowers that day.

JIMIN- You huffed loudly, annoyed.  You weren’t sure why you signed up for this.  Sure you loved makeup and trained hard to get where you have gotten.  However, you were more into special effects or maybe even some avant-garde makeup for model art.  Never before would you have thought that you would be doing some arragont kpop idol’s makeup.  Plus the job wasn’t challenging at all, pop on some eyeliner, smokey eye, TONS of BB cream, highlighter and sometimes blush.  Nothing too crazy.  However bills needed to be paid and you were told a makeup artist working for a certain popular kpop group all of a sudden got really sick, so they put you to work immediately. You showed up to the backstage of some music show, where a stylist informed you of the concept and implied certain aspects that should be brought out on your idol’s face.  You were taken to your vanity and was left with the promise of a man named ‘Jimin’ arriving shortly.

You quietly sorted out your own makeup along with some of the supplies that was previously laid out for your use.  Silently, you prayed that this Jimin guy wasn’t rude or a high class diva.  Yet, as usual your logical side took over and you began to ponder.

This group is supposedly VERY popular, you’re at a very famous music show and from the looks of it; this backstage dressing room that this group got was very nice and filled with attentive staff members all rushing to do something. 

You sighed.  

This guy was probably one of the most well-known idols in Korea. And fame is very hard not to get to your head.  You mentally prepared yourself for a Diva...or divo, rather.

Suddenly, you felt movement beside you and you realised someone had sat in the seat.  You slapped a brave face on and took out the primer and a foundation brush, you were still looked down and you wanted a quick peek of who this guy was sat down and ready for your appliance, while reaching over for a blender your eyes gazed up so you can see this mans face through the mirror.

He was already looking at you through the mirror’s reflection.  Staring rather...

His puffy eyelids and under-eyes practically smothered his own eyeballs, however you could tell that he was -without a doubt- staring at you.  You realised he may not be informed of why you (someone he’s never seen before) are now doing his makeup so you smiled, bowed and introduced yourself before continuing. 

“Hello, I’m (y/n) and I’ll be doing your makeup until your artist gets back.  Please take care of me.”

His seemingly stunned face was now curled up in a cute, childish grin.  You watched very amazed as his shoulers shrugged up to look smaller, his eyes completely dissapear behind the aeygo bags and and a gummy smile took over, revealing some pearly whites that a colgate commercial would be glad to have.  You kinda wanted to squeal but got ahold of yourself since you had to be proffesional.

“So your my new makeup artist?”  Suprisingly a thick and raspy voice came out of his pouty lips that held a strong busan accent.  You shook your head and reminded him that you said you were just here until the other one got back.  To which his smile dropped to a cute pout and his whole face scrunched up in what you can only describe as determination.  While you began your first steps of his face, you would’ve sworn you heard him mumble; “We’ll see about that.” 

At the end of the day, a representative from Bighit called and offered you a permanent position as Jimin’s makeup artist.  You attempted to decline, but they seemed oddly persistent that you take the offer...

(gif is when you tell him you aren’t his new makeup artist)

TAEHYUNG-You were a huge fan of BTS.  And like most Army, you found yourself growing a soft spot for one particular member.  Yours’ was Taehyung. You just saw alot of yourself in him.  Both of you are really weird and quirky but funny and caring people notheless.  Sometimes misunderstood but more intillegent than what people gave you credit for.  You loved the alien boy because you were an alien yourself.

You were so over-flowing with love that you decided to make a fan-account/blog for him.  You gained hundreds of followers because they loved how funny and unique you are, you also were really friendly and decided to chat with other fans openly on there.  You excitedly annouced that you were going to a bts fanmeet in your city, to which your followers all liked and commented how jealous they were and how lucky you were.  Some demanded you take pictures and video, which obviously you were gonna.  

You got an ask notification the night before the event.  It read, ‘OMG (y/n) I’m so happy you get to see them in person.  I hope that taehyung recongizes you.  Lol, wouldn’t it be funny if he jumped up after you tell him that your followers also call you alien and yell “THERE YOU ARE, MY LONG-LOST ALIEN SOULMATE!  Which planet are you from?!”  Anyway good luck tommorow~’  

You laughed while reading this and typed back a sassy but odd reply before going to bed.  

The next day you arrived at the fan meeting and although you were extremely nervous, a weird sense of calm hit you when you were about to go up to the table. You said hello to the first members, letting them know how wonderful they are and how much their music meant to you when suddenly you were face to face with your bias.

“Hey Tae oppa. You’re my favorite member and idea type and I just want you to know that I understand your antics very well given I’m labeled as weird too by some people.”

He looked up from signing your abulm but stopped in his tracts when he made eye contact.

“What’s your name?” He said, oddly still and not at all like the goof ball persona he had on when meeting other fans. You got scared for a second. Had you offended him or something?

“Y/n” you had said. He nodded in thought for a moment before continuing his signature and asking you some weird questions. Like how many kids you wanted or would you rather stay in or go out for a date. Before long you were shooed onto the next member, not before receiving a long and thoughtful stare from your bias.

At the end of day you were still thinking about the strange encounter you had with the man. You wondered if there was something about you that caused him to act more reserved or if he was just having a bad day? You thought about posting your experience to your followers to gain some insight but then thought against it. After all, idols are human too and the last thing you would want is to stir him up into a controversy.

You received a private message from your blog and when you went to open it, you were left confused.

‘I’m from Saturn. How about you? Love the blog btw, you weren’t kidding when you said you were odd too’

What followed after that was a selfie of Taehyung that you knew for sure was not recycled from the internet. Meaning he had to have taken that as he was speaking to you. He was even wearing the same outfit he had on during the fan signing.

He found your blog and was set on making your ‘alien couple’ fantasy into a reality.

JUNGKOOK- Being a college student was really hard. Constant stress and lack of funds caused you to suffer some mild anxiety. Like right now for example. You were currently looking at the list of books you’d need for the upcoming semester when your heart stopped beating from sheer shock. How in the devil’s butthole were you gonna find a way to pay for this?

“You know, I know a local bookstore that has a lot of university books for like a third of the price if your interested. You won’t have to pay like hundreds of dollars.” Your friend told you, trying to calm you down from the sheer panic attack that was about to hit you. She wrote down the address and told you to find it. With that, you bounced to find yourself some cheap books that won’t cost as much as a couple months’ worth of rent.

You found the shop and found the things you were needing. All except one. You just had one more book to buy but unluckily for you, it was super hard to find. You skimmed the shelves of this cute little shop, humming to the music they were playing in the background.

And then there it was.

The book you were in desperate need for in order to understand your class and pass.

But....it was in the hands of another.

A very good looking guy whom wore a white shirt, beanie and some timbs. You recognized him, given that many students at your school were fans of him and his group. But in this moment did you care at all that he was famous???

No.

If anything it made you more vengeful.

You were barely able to pay for food, and an idol who has everything at his finger tips was gonna steal a deal from you? Yeah, you were gonna let that happen.

“Yah! I need that book! You see unlike you, I am a broke student who REALLy needs that discounted book for a class! As an idol, I’m sure you could afford to buy it at full price!” You screeched in his face.

He looked up and was about to retort when he went silent and his big doe eyes got a glossy look. You continued to rant, somewhat blowing off steam on this innocent guy but little did you know, he wasn’t hearing a word. Lost in space (more like your face), all he could hear was the distant sound of wedding bells and angels singing. It was hard to see who was more insane in this scenario, the person who freaked out at a stranger for grabbing the book you wanted due to panicked stress and possibly the beginnings of a mental breakdown. Or the guy who sat there, let himself get berated bc he was too focused on planning his future wedding with this seemingly crazy person.

(Later he did buy you the book, after you swore to go to dinner with him.)

(GIF of him just staring at how gorgeous you are)

Fanboy!Hyunjin AU

HELLO GUYS! It’s 2 something in the morning where I live and I’m itching to post an au for hyunjin aside from the au’s I have in progress ( the nephilim!au and youtuber!au are coming soon i promise.) SO WHAT BETTER TO DO THAN AN IDOL AU

•so you’re a very popular member from a girl group called, A+. (ik, it’s lame, bare with me its 2 am)

•your music can be heard blaring out from many shops, restaurants, cafe’s, etc.

• and the group has received nothing but praise for the hard work you all put in during your trainee days to the present.

•NOW LETS GET TO FANBOY!HYUNJIN.

•skz are all stans of your group but each boy has a different bias.

• hyunjin is a very proud stan. he has you as his lock & home screen. it’s a photo your company first released of you when they were announcing the members of the group.

•he picked you to stan bc of your cool personality and amazing talents! you weren’t just a pretty face uwu

•collects every album/photo card of yours no matter how many versions your company releases.

• a cashier asked him once why he had ten copies of the same album and his reply was simple. each album has the possibility of having a signed photocard.

•he held his breath every time he opened an album, however he found a different member’s signed photocard.

•not gonna lie, he was kind of bummed but nevertheless still happy that he got the rare chance to own such a precious product.

•texted in the skz group chat who he got.

• then his phone started ringing and it was jeongin.

•he had to move the phone away from his ear bc the kid was screaming his dolphin scream from the other line.

•”YOU GOT HEYOON’S PHOTOCARD?!” the younger boy asked, panting from his battle cry.

• hyunjin responded with a yes.

•”I’LL TRADE YOU, I GOT (Y/N)!” jeongin shouted.

• cue both of them screaming at the same time after they agreed to trade

• this guy jams to A+’s songs while doing anything.

•going grocery shopping? he’s listening to it w/earbuds.

•eating dinner at a restaurant by himself? still listening.

•driving to pick up his dog from the groomers? the people outside his car can hear the song and see him TURNING UPPPPP to every bop y’all had ever released.

•he knows every line you have by heart. can recite it backwards too, true talent.

• first to open a fansite for you and it became a vERY big thing for your fandom????

•this guy, he’s like the ideal fansite everyone wishes to exist.

•he doesn’t white wash photos because he firmly believes that you are beautiful just as yourself, no lightening of skin necessary.

•he lets people edit his photos too but as long as they don’t crop out his infamous cute pencil and paper logo that has a red, “A+” written on it.

•he also runs an instagram that is dedicated to updates for your group.

•everyone is always like… “how tf does he get this info so fast? like your company just posted about the news of your comeback two minutes ago and he’s already got a whole post about it with his own personal concerns and hopes.”

•unbeknownst to the company, your group always keeps up with social media posts. you and the rest of your own members have secret accounts that you use to follow fans who like to give detailed inputs on your recent performances and interviews. all their cute edits and encouragement fill your heart full of love!

•you actually took notice of hyunjin’s account first because he was one of the most popular fan accounts in the fandom. EVERYONE could count on his posts bc he didn’t publish any info till he verified it as true.

•you appreciated how he wrote about the little extra movements you made in your dance choreos that really make the overall concept of your song pop. the tiny habits you hadn’t noticed about yourself were things he wrote about as well. he also wasn’t creepy in his writing too. you could really sense how much this boy adored your music.

•btw he posted one selfie after hitting a milestone of 2 million followers and you might of… choked on your drink for a bit bc wow! this guy is behind all them posts?!

•ooooof don’t get me started on the first fanmeet your company held.

•hyunjin’s palms were sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy (bahahaha sorry i had to put in a little eminem in there.) because he was literally going to come face to face with the individual who brightened up his life with her jokes, performing abilities, and more!

• the plane touched down and your group was led out into the airport lounge area where he and the numerous fans already waiting there, IT WAS INTENSE.

• security were doing their best to keep everyone calm but most of the fans were shoving and pulling to get a closer look at y’all.

•not hyunjin though. he was just nervously waiting for your group to make a turn in the corner of the large hallway with a small present in his hand.

• the second he saw you round the area where he stood, he didn’t try and take advantage of the fact that the security were only covering one side of the hallway from the crowd, leaving you completely exposed to simply walk in front of him with no one to hold him back if he invaded your personal space. which he totally didn’t :D

• see? The fansite every group deserves lol

•you paused when he called your name because… you’ve seen that face before!!!

•tbh he didn’t expect you to stop bc his words got caught in his throat when your eyes met his and instead his hand held out a small neatly gift wrapped box.

•you accepted the gift with a smile, a thank you, and a bow. your fingers brushed against his wrist for a moment and you both felt static surge through your hands.

•AHHHH THE CUTE FACIAL EXPRESSION YOU HAD ON WHILE YOU APOLOGIZED FOR ELECTROCUTING HIM WAS MAKING HIS FACE TURN REDDER AND REDDER BY THE MOMENT.

•”no worries! we’re both okay and that’s what matters.” he said looking very flustered.

•you were called to by heyoon bc the other members were already in the van just waiting for you.

•while the stylist was adding some finishing touches to your outfit, she asked, “do you have a specific jewelry piece in mind today?” you held up the gift hyunjin had given you and it was a beautiful necklace with a pendant that had the words, “side by side, or miles apart, your fans are always connected with you through the heart,” engraved onto it.

•this guy had the biggest smile on his face when he saw you wearing the gift he thought about for a while.

•”cute necklace!” he heard a member beside you say.

• “thanks, it’s my favorite.” you replied, and now it was his turn to kneel in front of you, his heart beating faster/harder than earlier.

OOF! would you guys like a part 2, ya girl is totally open. it’s like four minutes to four am here now, ahaha took me a while to make this. hope you enjoyed it! if you’re going to kcon la on saturday and sunday, let me know bc i’ll be there!!!!! time to sleeeeeeep. i might edit little errors here and there when i wake up later on lol. sweet dreams, my precious cabbages.

Meeting Emilie de Ravin . . . . .

Honestly, this was truly one of the best experiences of my entire life.  Under the cut for length . . . . 

First of all -- yes, I did do Emilie’s Meet and Greet.  I didn’t think I’d get in because it was so last minute that I decided to go, so I was so excited that I got in!  

First I have to start by saying that before Emilie came into the room, Rose Reynolds popped in because her handler wasn’t paying attention and she just kind of wandered in (her M&G was at the same time as Emilie’s).  It was very cute and she just seems adorable but more on her later.  Just wanted to put that here.  

You know -- I honestly didn’t know what to expect from Emilie.  I mean -- I’ve read stories about her but I’m the type that doesn’t know what to think until I see for myself.  Also it was different than with Giles.  I mean -- I like Giles but I don’t have the same ‘fan attachment’ that I do with Emilie so it was just different, if that makes sense.  

So I will just say this -- Emilie de Ravin is, from my experience, one of the sweetest, friendliest, intelligent and most down to earth people I’ve ever met.  When she came into the room it was clear she OWNED the room but didn’t act like it at all.  She asked each of us where we were from and was genuinely interested in all of us as individuals.  I was wearing the ‘No one decides my fate but me’ t-shirt from Hot Topic and she really liked it.  (From her reaction I don’t think she’d seen it before, which surprised me!) She asked where I got it and I told her you can get it at Hot Topic.  She said she wanted one -- not to wear, she said, because that would be ‘weird’ but she wanted the shirt.  I was also wearing the BatB ‘rose’ earrings and necklace (also from Hot Topic) and she liked those as well.  

I’m really trying to remember what all we talked about because it was seriously just like sitting at a table with a friend chatting.  She was very at ease in the room and just wanted to chat about whatever.  

One thing that I found interesting -- she said that she WAS asked if she wanted to sing on the musical episode -- SHE said no.  She doesn’t feel that she’s a good singer and felt that if she couldn’t do a good job of it (she didn’t want it to ‘suck’ and be embarrassed) she didn’t want to do it.  So it was her choice to bow out of that episode.  

She said there’s going to be a Lost Convention either next year or the year after in Hawaii -- it’s an anniversary of the show or something.  She told us all to come, LOL!  I guess several of the actors are going.  I’m not a Lost fan but for those that are I thought you might be interested and start saving!  

She has seen the cartoon BatB but she hasn’t seen the live action version and asked US how it was!  She loves watching TV but said a lot of her viewing time is now kids stuff with Vera.  

Here’s an interesting thing:  Emilie was NOT AWARE that they had used her photo AND her voice on ‘The Guardian’.  She is now.  :)

We also told her that the photo of her was obviously at Dark Castle photo and she joked about Rumple having cameras hidden in there!  

I really don’t know what else to share from that experience.  There are a couple things I’m keeping to myself because they just don’t need to be out there in the greater fandom, but overall it was just Emilie sitting and casually chatting with everyone.  At the end of the M&G, she took a selfie with everyone on their phone.  So I have TWO photos with her -- one from the photo op, and the M&G selfie!  

Speaking of the photo op -- she remembered me from the M&G and said ‘hello again!’ when I went to take my picture with her.  BTW she’s VERY TEENY but honestly NOT as teeny as I THOUGHT she’d be.  I honestly expected her to be smaller.  But she is beautiful in person, even more than on the show.  

Then later when I went to get the photo op duo with her and Giles, I had to get back in line to do a retake and she joked ‘you blinked on purpose!’ and I am DEAD at that point!  :0  I love her.  

Finally, the autographs were the last thing that day.  I had her sign the Rumbelle page of that “Out of the Past” graphic novel.  It was clear she’d seen it before, and she commented that she loved the pictures in it.  This was the only chance I had to talk to her ‘one on one’ so I just told her first of all that as an animal lover, I really appreciated all that she did for animal advocacy.  Then I showed her a picture of my doggies because I know she loves animals and since I know I’ll never get a picture of HER with them (trust me if I could have done THAT for the photo op I would have!) at least I can say that my dogs have the Emilie de Ravin stamp of approval.  She loved the picture and said they were adorable and wanted to know how old they were.  I know, kind of a nerdy thing to do but I just decided why not!  

So then I just told her how much I love Belle and Rumbelle and thanked her for 7 years of Rumbelle and she said she was glad that I enjoyed it.  

And yes I’m still fangirling over this experience!  I have photos to share and those are coming -- stay tuned!  

Mystic Messenger Fanfiction | VanderwoodxOC Cerise - Tagged | Ch. 12 Seven's Bunker

***What a day to post! Saeran route is officially available for Android users and my best friend is over at my place playing it, so we can experience the glory together. I'm hoping for a good route that I can do a continuation for in my Good Ending Continued Series. I just made it through Seven's route again and am drafting the beginning of his version which I hope to start posting by March. Hope to see ya'll reading that too~ Vandy will obvs make an appearance. Oh, btw, next week you get your first Cherrywood NSFW. ;3  ~Let's Connect! FFC***

*Remember, this is a sequel to Vanderwood Backstory, and Cerise has a bio. Don’t forget to subscribe to the email list for access to R-Rated Scenes and my monthly newsletter. You can support my writing on patreon and get access to my VIP Discord Server or other goodies like early chapter releases and hidden scenes.  Tagged Chapter Directory*

After their most recent encounter with Marie, Vanderwood and Cerise had decided to take another day before heading away from the hotel, making a shopping trip to a store for Cerise to purchase some pillows that would make her more comfortable while staying at the bunker. (Hidden deleted chapter for patrons.) It was for the better that she’d be there until Vanderwood could leave the agency. She needed to be kept safe; that was his highest priority. Cerise was simply playing around with her phone during the ride, only putting it away once Vanderwood pulled into Seven’s garage. He locked the security system using the in-car controls before turning to her. “Alright, shortcake…Let’s get you inside.”

Honestly, he was feeling just a little anxious. Vanderwood had always been on Seven’s case that relationships weren’t safe for them, that they didn’t deserve it. Not that he thought Seven would complain, more like he had a feeling the redhead would somehow take revenge on him. Seven would definitely be weird and annoying, that was inevitable, and he rolled his shoulders back, already dreading the idiot’s behavior.

Cerise was just ready to stretch her legs again, eager to get out of the car. Once Marion helped her out of the car, she grabbed her cherry pillow from the back and held it with both arms as they approached who she assumed was Seven. He looked nice enough, and he was already smiling. Of course, Marion had warned her that Seven was a troll, but maybe he was exaggerating. Sometimes it seemed like Marion saw the worst in everything.

Seven was standing in the doorway to the house with a huge grin on his face as Vanderwood approached, standing close to Cerise. Something about the grin on the redhead's face made the brunet feel on edge. "Ooo, I read in her file that she was short, but she is absolutely adorable, Mary." And Seven was already pissing him off. Cerise shuffled, her nose scrunching up in displeasure. The first thing out of his mouth was commenting on her height?

Vanderwood was about to open his mouth to give the redheaded idiot a piece of his mind when Seven started to reach for Cerise's waist like he was going to pick her up. Cerise stepped back, tucking herself a little behind him as Vanderwood felt something ugly stirring in his chest. Not only was Seven about to put his hand over her still healing wound, but the redhead was also about to touch his girlfriend. Vanderwood snatched Seven's arm roughly. "Pick her up, and I will break your arm."

Seven’s eyes widened somewhat at the tight grip. Holy...Vanderwood was mad. The redhead had seen him mad plenty of times, maybe even gotten tased on one or two occasions, but this was different. He frowned and pulled his arm away from Vanderwood's grip, who let go, seemingly a little confused as well at why his reaction had been so violent so quickly. If it had been anyone else, Seven had a feeling his arm would already be broken. Well, no matter, just don’t touch the little lady, and he could still have fun. The redhead grinned just as wide as before at Cerise. “As you wish, Mary dearest. I'm Seven Oh Seven, good to meet you, Lady Vandy. I happen to enjoy your blog as of late. I might have a picture or two of my maid that you can add."

She was glad that Vanderwood had succeeded in keeping his partner from picking her up, still sensitive where her wound was and not really interested in being treated like a child. Cerise chuckled nervously as the man introduced himself. "...Lady Vandy?" Apparently, he knew about her blog...not like it was hard to find it. Cerise glanced over towards her boyfriend who seemed to be in a state of irritation. She slipped her hand into his, giving it a little squeeze. Obviously Vanderwood's anger didn't deter his partner, and somehow, that was unnerving to her. "Uhh...sure, but I don’t think I know your maid?"

Vanderwood was already bristling, clearly not wanting Seven to show off his pictures, but when the girl took his hand, he seemed to get somewhat distracted. It was actually kind of sweet seeing the big guy with his girlfriend. He'd always thought Vanderwood wouldn't be able to find anyone to grab his attention, for longer than a few hours anyway. Of course, it also stung. Seven found what he was looking for and with an exaggerated bow, held out his phone, showing Cerise the photo of Vanderwood and he dressed as maids. Seven was hanging off of Vanderwood's shoulder in the photo, who looked very unamused.

Cerise peeked at the phone with her eyes wide, although as soon as Marion saw that photo, he snatched the redhead's phone. "No. Absolutely not." She had still managed to get a good look though, and now her mind was racing. Was that...was he...? Crossdressing, really? Just what sort of relationship did those two even have? She was horribly, horribly confused. Was this another part of his past that she didn't know about? Cerise kept nervously glancing between Vanderwood and Seven even as Vanderwood handed the phone back to Seven, presumably after deleting the image. Was there more about him that she didn’t know?

Deleting the photo was probably pretty useless, since Seven likely had a million copies, but it at least felt somewhat therapeutic, even with his eyebrow twitching. Cerise’s hand slipped out of his, causing him to furrow his brows and watch her from the corner of his eyes. She seemed…shocked and lost in thought. Well, could he expect anything less when Seven had just shown her a picture like that? He’d have to deal with that later, once the redhead wasn’t around. Vanderwood slipped his hand behind Cerise's back after giving Seven a little shove, getting a laugh from the redhead even as Vanderwood guided Cerise past him, grumbling. "Lay off, will you?"

He led his girlfriend to the couch, but Seven still seemed to be hovering. That wasn’t completely unusual. Vanderwood sighed and rubbed his face. “I’ll be right back, shortcake.” Cerise made a noncommittal noise. She didn't even take out her phone when she sat on the couch as she tried to wrap her head around the situation and make sense of it.

Vanderwood broached the topic of leaving the agency, disbanding it even, but it seemed like Seven wasn’t entirely on board. It didn’t make sense to him. In all the time Vanderwood had known the redhead, Seven had always seemed like he hated what he had to do and the workload. Although, once the kid mentioned his twin brother, Vanderwood felt a tight pang in his chest. He hadn’t known. Well, he’d suspected there was someone that the redhead was protecting, but it made even more sense to him now. "Right, yeah, just give me a day to rest up then...I’ll help you find your brother and then we’ll get out of this." The redhead seemed far more on board with that. It would mean field work, potential danger, being away from Cerise, but that was what it was going to have to take.

Vanderwood rejoined Cerise on the couch as Seven shot him a peace sign and left the house, with a grin that once again had Vanderwood questioning if the redhead was up to something. Cerise was still out of it, only shifting slightly as Marion sat next to her. She hadn’t been able to hear what he and his partner had been talking about, but considering that she didn’t understand what was really going on between the two of them, she wasn’t sure if she even wanted to know.

"So, that's Seven. I took a bullet for that asshole." God, he felt awkward. Vanderwood rubbed at the back of his head. He hadn't addressed the photo yet, but with Cerise sitting here looking like she was going through the shock of her life, he was going to have to deal with it right now. "That photo...that was just us doing undercover work, and in no way do I do that normally, nor did I enjoy it in any capacity." He wasn’t sure if she just had an issue with crossdressing or if she was having weird visions of him walking around in women’s clothing, but he wanted to nip anything like that in the bud right away.

Cerise had been about to ask him about the photo, but he had beaten her to it. His explanation made her sigh in relief. Okay, so that was one less thing she had to worry about...It wouldn't have made her love him any less, she would have just had...a bit of concern. Knowing now that he wasn’t a crossdresser or secretly wanted to be a woman or something…It made the photo a lot more hilarious. He had looked really irritated in it too, like he wanted to kill somebody. "I think..." She started to laugh a little now, the hilarity of the moment really hitting her, "...That you might...pfft...look better in a skirt than I do."

He had been waiting for her reaction, watching her, but when she finally did react, he wasn’t sure how to process that either. Was she laughing at him? And then what she'd said actually started to make sense in his brain. "C'mon, Cerise. I’m too masculine for that bullshit…” His voice kind of trailed off a little before he coughed and the rest of what he was thinking made its appearance. "Besides...no one could ever be better looking than you." It was really true, no one had ever affected him in the way that she did. Her cuteness had been the first thing to strike him when he'd met her, but that had quickly transformed into the knowledge that he found her strikingly beautiful. Vanderwood rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. He needed a change of subject. Now that he wasn’t on a mission anymore and cigarettes were back on the table he also felt like he was getting a craving. "Do you uh...want to watch a movie or something?"

Cerise was still giggling, loving the way he was reacting. Maybe she would have to ask Seven if he had any backups of the photo later. She hoped he did, because she now found that she needed it. Grinning at the compliment, she gave Marion a kiss on the cheek before settling back down on the couch. "A movie sounds great. Let's watch something you like." Cerise was a little excited to see the type of thing he would watch on his own. So far, they'd only watched things together that she enjoyed.

"Um..." Something he liked to watch? Mostly all he'd ever watched was action movies and laughing at the crazy shit they did in the secret agent ones. Sometimes he'd complain about them totally flubbing something up...but if she wanted to watch something he wanted to watch..."I guess that'll be a secret agent movie then." The nerd in him had considered grabbing Niron Man, but he didn’t quite want to reveal just how much of a dweeb he was right now. He smiled sheepishly, getting up from the couch to grab a movie he'd watched several times and starting it up. Cerise just giggled at his selection as he worked on getting things ready. Did he like to watch secret agent movies ironically or something?  

Vanderwood stretched and looked at the couch as the opening previews started to play. After being cramped up in the car all day, he really needed to stretch out. Maybe Cerise wouldn't mind. His face filled with a little bit of color. "Shortcake, you think I could lay across the couch and you could uh...lay on my chest maybe?" Why was he being so awkward to ask such a simple little question? She tilted her head a bit at his request before smiling widely. "I'd love to do that." Cerise wasn't about to pass up an opportunity to snuggle up to him, no matter the reason, and laying on his chest while watching a movie sounded cozy and actually sorta romantic. She shifted out of the way to let him lay down, grabbing her cherry pillow from the cushion where she’d placed it and hugging it tight.

He stretched out onto the couch, making a soft groan of relief at getting to lay down and relax. Vanderwood was really getting into this lazy day stuff. He furrowed his brows, eyes scanning the room. It didn’t look like a pigsty…Had the redhead cleaned up on his account or for Cerise? Or was the redhead really planning something?

Once Cerise had settled down onto Vanderwood’s chest, he reached for the remote and started the movie. She could probably hear his heart skipping just a little as she'd first laid down, something he was starting to get used to when it came to her. Vanderwood stroked her hair and back gently, knowing she liked that from the time they'd spent watching TV in the hotel room. Cerise could hear the quickening of his heartbeat as she snuggled the cherry pillow trapped between them. She found the way his heart changed pace as she nuzzled him endearing as well as amusing. This man wasn't playing when he said he had feelings for her, and it made her own heart beat faster. Cerise couldn't help but to close her eyes despite the movie playing as he stroked her hair. She was a victim to the calming sound of his heartbeat. The way he was gently stroking her hair and then her back...who could blame her for having heavy eyelids?

He pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head as he hit play on the main menu. This was so incredibly pleasant. His brows furrowed as a soft hissing got his attention. Vanderwood looked up, seeing the emergency sprinkler directly above him opening up. Shit fuck, and the next moment the sprinkler started pouring on them. He was pretty stuck with her on top of him, not wanting to move too fast and knock her off him to get hurt.

Cerise was just able to drift off when she was beginning to get soaked with water, causing her to shriek and jump up. Her first instinct was to protect her phone, so she shoved it in between the cushion and arm of the couch. It was already too late for the pillow she was cuddling in her arms. She looked up to see that all of the water was coming from the sprinkler above the couch and moved away from it to try and get out of range of the thing. "How do you turn this thing off!?"

Vanderwood was about to get more soaked than he already was. "Fucking...Just a second." He pushed himself up and hopped onto the couch, reaching up to the sprinkler and manually placing it into the locked position, stopping the downpour. Everything was sopping wet, from his hair, to his clothes, to his girlfriend. His jacket and gloves would need some tending to after this bullshit. Grumbling, he hopped off the couch, pulling off the items and hanging them over a nearby chair to dry. This had to be Seven. One single sprinkler turns on and it happens to be the one right above them? Vanderwood turned to check on his girlfriend. "You alright, Cerise? Besides being wet, I mean." His eyebrow twitched just a little. The redhead was going to get it. He didn't know how yet, but he'd figure it out.

Cerise nodded and looked to the now soaked couch where her phone was hidden, approaching slowly just in case the sprinkler decided to come back on. She reached for her phone, scrunching her eyes closed tight before trying to press the home button and then opening her eyes to see if it had turned on. Thankfully it still worked and wasn't damaged…but her poor pillow. Cerise squished it a little and water dripped onto the floor. She stared at it blankly for a moment before tears formed in her eyes. Once a soft, fluffy pillow got wet, it would never be the same again. She hadn't even gotten to properly cuddle it yet! It probably seemed silly to cry over a pillow but dammit! It had so much cuddling potential! Cerise kind of crouched with the wet pillow and held it to her chest, not caring because she was rather soaked herself. One last cuddle for her fallen comrade.

He watched rather helplessly as tears formed in her eyes. Holy shit, his girlfriend was crying! What was he supposed to do? He felt completely unprepared. Oh, that redhead was so dead. Vanderwood just went with his gut instinct and crouched down next to her, pulling her into his arms with gentle care and kissing the top of her head. He didn't say anything, not really one hundred percent positive on why she was crying, but he supposed that didn't really matter at the moment. What was important was that he got her to feel better, and this seemed like a normal way to do that...right?

Cerise leaned into him and sniffled a little. "The pillow you got me is ruined...you're not supposed to get them wet..." Vanderwood held her a little tighter as she sniffled. "I'm sorry, shortcake..." It seemed a rather silly thing to be crying over to him, he’d been concerned that it was something horrible. Well, maybe this was horrible in her mind. The harder Cerise squeezed the pillow, the more water dripped from it. It was like her pillow was crying too.

After a few minutes of silence, she straightened herself up and did her best to wring out the rest of the water from the pillow. She sighed and looked at it with a sad expression before turning back to Vanderwood who was starting to stand up now too. "At least I still have it so...that's a plus." Cerise shivered a little, reminding her that she was indeed still wet, and the room was a little chilly. "We should probably go get some dry clothes. "They were pretty damn soaked, and Vanderwood wasn’t about to disagree with her, definitely not when she’d just been crying. "Let me just go grab your stuff out of the car.”

He was thinking about how he would get back at Seven as he headed out to the car, grabbing her bag from the back. His eyebrow twitched as he heard something else, faint thanks to his hearing damage but... Was that barking? Oh no. Oh no, no. Vanderwood broke out in a run back to the living room.

Cerise had taken out her phone to write a status update while she waited when she heard shuffling. She looked around confused until there was barking. What looked like a tiny robotic dog had wandered into the living room and was barking at her. It was actually kinda cute, and she kinda wanted to...pet it? She had made up her mind to do so when Vanderwood came barreling back into the living room, yelling not to touch it.

"Cerise! Whatever you do don't touch that dog!" What the Hell was the redhead thinking? That stupid fire-breathing guard dog could really hurt her. Of course, Seven was probably sending it out for him, but really. What the fuck? The dog was standing in the living room, facing the doorway as Vanderwood came in, and then it's mouth opened, an orange glow visible. Oh shit. He ducked out of the way and ran to pick up Cerise, carrying her bridal style.

She had turned to shoot him a puzzled look before the dog's mouth began to glow, and then he was picking her up and running off with her. It was hard for her mind to keep up. The dog started to spew flames from its mouth as it chased him. What was even happening...? "The dog breathes fire!?" She asked him incredulously. Was this normal for this place? It wasn't long before the lights went out too, the only light coming from the glow of the robot dog's flames. Now Cerise was panicking and terrified. It was like something out of a horror movie.

Holy Lord, this wasn't good. He couldn't remember the damn command for the mutt. Had Seven been banking on him remembering? Jesus. "It's okay, just...gotta remember what ‘heel’ is in Arabic." Vanderwood was going to strangle Seven. It was dark too, and he was having to think hard to figure out where his own room was. Cerise was in danger in his own damn house. He started randomly spewing the Arabic words he could remember as the dog continued to bark away. At least it was keeping its fireballs restricted to the floor. Vanderwood got to his doorway after what felt like running in circles for ages, placing Cerise and her bag inside. "Change here, I'll take care of the mutt." He closed the door as fast as he could to keep that dog out, running back into the living room to find his Arabic dictionary in his jacket.

Cerise stumbled around in the room a bit in the dark, her heart beating wildly and trying to calm down. She was worried but was sure that Vanderwood could handle it...being an actual secret agent and all. Still...that dog was scary. What dog breathes fire anyways!? She dug around in her bag to try and find some clothes to change into. She couldn't really see, so she grabbed whatever. Matching was the least of her problems at the moment, and she just wanted to be out of her wet clothes. Cerise peeled off her clothes and replaced them with the dry ones she had randomly chosen. Just as suddenly as the lights had turned off, they turned back on. Did that mean Vanderwood had successfully defeated the scary fire breathing robot dog? She wanted to take a peek outside of the dorm but decided against it, because who knew after that what she would find?

Vanderwood had been stumbling around trying to find his jacket when the redhead finally decided to show a little mercy by turning the lights back on. He was probably laughing his ass off as he watched from the CCTV's. After grabbing his jacket and rummaging around in the pockets, he was finally able to find the dictionary. It was soaked, but somehow, he found the right page. Vanderwood gave the command and the dog stopped completely, sitting back on its haunches and shutting down.

Such a quick fix for something so disastrous. He breathed a sigh of relief and focused on trying to catch his breath. There were scorch marks all over the floor. So that was why the house had been clean, why he’d used the sprinkler on the couch. Seven had been trying to keep from starting an actual fire or damaging anything important. The brunet’s eyebrow was twitching like mad, his skin starting to crawl as he looked at the mess. Vanderwood needed to clean…but then Cerise was probably worried. As much as he couldn’t stand the mess, his OCD making him itch like mad, Vanderwood started to make his way back to his room. She was far more important than the mess.

"Everything's fine now, shortcake!" Vanderwood called out to her before he returned to his room, pausing before entering, not wanting to walk in on her changing like he had that one time. He knocked and waited for her okay before opening the door and going to her, taking her face in his hands. "Are you alright?" His brown eyes searched her gold ones as he ran his hands over her, looking for any injuries just in case, too focused on the task at hand to be flustered by it.

"I'm fine...are you?" He just nodded as he continued what he was doing. Cerise didn't really care that he was dripping some water on her as he checked her over, she was just happy that he was able to handle the danger and get back seemingly without any injuries. Having him worry over her like this was sweet...even if having his hands run over her was a little flustering. She knew his mind wasn't anywhere near that, so she didn't make a fuss over it. "You should probably get changed yourself. I'll wait outside the door." It shouldn't be a problem if the threat of the dog was taken care of. Cerise gave him a quick squeeze before she headed out the door, closing it behind her and waiting for him to change.

Vanderwood had been about to tell her that he had an attached bathroom, but she was already headed out of the door, and he was getting hit with a Hell of a realization. Only then did he realize that he'd just touched her practically everywhere. His face turned all sorts of red as he grabbed some clothes to change into, getting out of his soaked pants as well as his shoes and everything else. He could walk around the house barefoot just fine, so Vanderwood threw on just a t-shirt and some pants, praying to whatever douchebag of a God existed that Seven was done with his trolling game before joining Cerise just outside his room in the hallway.

When he finally reappeared from his room, she turned around to face him and couldn't help but to blush a little. He was wearing normal clothes...just a t-shirt and pants, but somehow, he made it look extremely attractive. She was pulled from her thoughts when he started getting close to her and her heart felt like it was beating out of her chest. Normally she wasn't this hyper aware of him or this flustered at the mere sight of him...What was going on? He was giving her a sheepish smile, trying not to think about the fact he'd just had his hands all over her.

His thoughts slipped to Seven, anger and tenseness slipping into him, worse the more he thought about it. He decided to focus on Cerise, knowing she had that amazing ability to calm him down...when she wasn't irritating him too. A small snort escaped him at the thought. She was his everything, and he was really going to give that redhead some good payback, although he wasn't positive on how yet. Vanderwood bent his head to give Cerise a kiss. Cerise melted right into him, her hands going to his chest as he pulled her closer. Was her heartbeat even wilder than normal? She didn’t have time to dwell on it.

The floor was moving out from under them, and Vanderwood broke their kiss just before it sped up even more. Fuck. How had he forgotten about the damn hallway conveyor belt? They tumbled, causing Cerise to shriek in surprise. Thankfully, she had fallen on top of him. Vanderwood grunted as he hit the floor, quick to wrap his arms around her protectively. Then the conveyor belt just stopped moving, having deposited them at the end of the hallway.

Once the dumb conveyor belt stopped moving, she attempted to check on him, because he was the one who had the pleasure of falling right onto the floor with extra weight on him. "Marion! Ohmygosh Are you okay?" Luckily, her wound hadn't been disturbed much. It ached a little, but it wasn't as bad as it could have been.

Vanderwood’s mind was turning toward revenge. Seven was so dead. He probably wouldn't be home until late that night, but that meant he wasn't going to get much sleep…Perfect. It really wasn't time to think about that right now with her on top of him, though, and now she was fussing over him. He couldn't help but blush at how she was checking on him, using his real name. It just sounded so nice coming from her. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine, shortcake." His hand found her cheek, thumb stroking gently. "I'm fine." Actually, he was surprised that he wasn't so tense that he couldn't think, surprised at just how little effort it was taking to push irritation away in favor of caring for her and enjoying her presence. It seemed like the more he had gotten used to not using sex as a stress-reliever, the easier it was to relax normally. That felt so fucking good. No pun intended.

Cerise sighed in relief and smiled as he responded to her. The guy took bullets and being cut like a champ, of course a fall wouldn't hurt him...but she still couldn't help but to worry. Cerise nuzzled into his hand before realizing that maybe she should get off of him, so he could get up. She laughed nervously and stood up, blushing something fierce again. "I uh...thanks for breaking my fall by the way..."

That blush on her face was supremely adorable, and he immediately responded without even thinking. "I'll always be there to break your fall...Just like you were when I fell for you." Cheesy. He was going to have to get used to the fact that he sounded like an utter idiot when he was hitting on her. All other women, he was charming and sultry, but no, he was just a cheesy idiot with her. Vanderwood got up from the floor, briefly rubbing the back of his head where he'd whacked it, for once not rubbing it because he felt awkward. He was so sweet, and it was just making her blush worse. She turned around, so he couldn't see her, rubbing at her cheeks...which was probably doing absolutely nothing.

He looked up at the CCTV directly above them and flipped it off. It was best to get the two of them out of any main areas of the house where Seven could enjoy watching his trolling through CCTV feeds. "Let's head to my room...It's safer in there." Cerise nodded her head in agreement, hoping that maybe magically her blush would go down, as she turned to follow him back to his room. They were both stepping carefully, so as to avoid the conveyor belt. Yeah...his room was probably safer. She didn't quite know what was going on, but she definitely didn't want any more surprises from the weird house.

Vanderwood was busy hating himself for having moved into Seven’s house, but it had become impossible not to with the way the redhead had started slacking when that ‘MC’ joined the RFA or whatever stupid charity group it was that the idiot had joined despite the security risk. Could he really judge the redhead for the security risk anymore now that he had his own? It was better not to think about it. Honestly, it all felt a little like déjà vu, as though maybe he’d been through this route of things several times before. His scar from Drawl started to ache as well as his head, so he just shook his head and opened his door, holding it open to let Cerise inside. At least they’d be safer in here.

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Last night, I got to see The End of Longing, starring Matthew Perry (who also wrote it), Quincy Dunn-Baker, Sue Jean Kim, and of course, Jennifer Morrison. Now, seeing as the lady is my page's icon, this was a big thing for me! I've met celebrities before, but this is someone who I've see on my television countless times over the past two and a half years and has brought me countless amounts of joy through her stunning performances. Needless to say I was super excited about meeting her! I even sent my first selfies to two of my Tumblr friends to ask for advice about what to wear (Thanks again @dani-ellie03 and @novalian)! I had been waiting for this moment for months now, and yesterday, it came. How was it you may ask? Well, read ahead! The play itself was really good. It wasn't groundbreaking but the performances and earnestness of it was delightful and endearing. I truly felt for all the characters as the story progressed, especially Stevie and Jeffrey's adorable romance! Jennifer Morrison, playing an escort named Stephanie, was as usual, great in her performance, and around the second half, really tugged up my heartstrings. The end of the show brought a rush to the stage door right after the bows concluded, and my friend and I had made it to a respectable place in line. We exchanged excited glances and words as we waited for Jen to come out. And out she did, to a blizzard of cheers! I could see her eyes pop with excitement and surprise as she took it in. Slowly, Jennifer worked her way through the fans, and I mentally went over the plan my friend and I had made. Earlier in the week, my friend Kate (she's in the center of the picture with Jen) made me the coolest offer in the history of cool offers. She's an artist, and she wanted to draw a picture of Jen for her to sign for me. I was honored, needless to say. Over the week, she sent me pictures of her progress and it only got more and more beautiful by the day until finally, it was the drawn photo that you see above. In addition, we both wanted to give something to Jen. Kate, a short time ago, signed up for this bath bomb fandom box from Fizzy Fairy Apothecary for their Once Upon a Time themed box. In their was an Emma box, and as soon as we learned we were going, she decided to give it to her. As for me, I went with roses that looked the color of Middlemists from the show. Now, the plan was (and we ended up following) was for Kate to present her drawing to get Jen to sign for me while I gave her our gifts and got Jen to sign Kate's playbill. She approached and we went through with our plan. It went very well. I think nerves compelled me to speak a lot more than I probably should have, but we did it. Jen even took a photo with us! That was pretty cool too, both because we were taking a photo WITH HER and because when my first photo looked bad, she took my phone and helped us take a better picture, which is what you see! As you can see, I'm on the left! #firsttumblrselfie As Jen was leaving I said something that I had always wanted to. I apologized for the mean people who plague her Twitter. Her response? Cool and professional! "No worries. Everyone has their opinion." Readers of every kind, we have a goddess on our hands, one too good for this world. If you're in the area while the show is running, consider going to see it. I had fun, even regardless of the stage door! Btw, after the show, go to the Big Gay Ice Cream Shop just a couple of blocks away! It is well worth your time and money! Anyway, have a great night everyone!

JOURNAL 3 BLACKLIGHT EDITION REVEALED! (Part 1)

Today’s a special day! Today is not only Father’s Day, but Alex and Ariel Hirsch’s birthday! Let’s celebrate by cracking open your copy of Journal 3, prepping your blacklight and invisible ink pens, and jotting down everything here in the special edition so you can have a copy for yourself without resorting to eBay or shady second-hand Craigslist deals!

I was lucky number 02149 to get a copy of the special edition of Journal 3. Well, lucky as in “I could afford to buy it and pre-ordered it back in March the exact day I heard about it going on sale.” Still, I am PSYCHED to share this with everyone! Admittedly I didn’t take photos of every single page – only the ones with black-light effects that were more than ink spatters. Some I had to take [kinda big] pictures of individually, to be able to read the text properly, and others were multi-page spreads that I couldn’t resist capturing in their beautiful glowy glory.

Of course I’ll be captioning them all for you, in case you can’t download/read them. Also, there’s a few secret codes in here! But did you really expect anything less? Also also, this is a 9 page word document (not counting pics), so I’m splitting it up into 3 parts. Especially considering the size of these pictures. 

I know it’s not black-light images, but you just have to look at how this sucker came packaged. They literally took the time to wrap it in thick paper and label it like it was a forbidden document, and wrap it with a twine bow. It was a sight to behold. Inside, the book was actually in a cardboard box to keep both the hardcover safe and the magnifying glass & bookmark from sliding around everywhere. Seriously, the attention to detail in this presentation alone is amazing.

SERIOUSLY. AMAZING.

First pic – the introduction by Alex Hirsch himself! He really did sign his initials in marker! And underneath his picture says “BILL WAS HERE” and a little Bill holding a paintbrush.

BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE. Hirsch planted a secret message in blue letters within the letter:  “LUCKY YOU”.

Parks Department notice: “LET THE GAMES BEGIN.” That’s Bill’s handwriting, btw. 

Floating Eyeballs page: “NONSENSE! I was wrong to worry about these things! They are inconsequential! Pepper spray makes ‘em go away!!!” (Oh, and the photo of the eyeballs lifts up to show a secret message. Translated from Ceaser -3, it says: “I OFTEN SEE STRANGE THINGS IN THE CORNER OF MY EYE. NEW THEORY - DOES THE CORNER OF YOUR EYE ACTUALLY SEE AN ALTERNATE PLANE OF REALITY?”)

Giant Vampire Bats!! page: “Nothing to worry about! All they want is fruit! The missing livestock were actually eaten by a hot-sauce-loving beast called the chalupacabra.” 

[underneath the photo of the water tower (thanks @lephuongtrang!!)] “I’ve been BITTEN! Once of those beasts swooped in and sank his teeth into my forehead while I was counting mushroom spots in the forest! Fortunately, my body shows no signs of vampirism. My head hurts a little, though. Probably an usual response to being bitten by a bat...then again, I have been desiring blood more than usual.... Best not to think about it. Never slumber with them near.” 

The Gnome page [is HUGE]:  “Feral Gnomes: The deeper into the woods you go, the more wild and rude the gnomes turn! Be careful! A gnome bite from a feral gnome will make you get gradually hairier and shorter over the course of your lifetime. Which is fine if you want to work in tech support but a nightmare for the rest of us.

“QUEEN GNOME:  Without a queen, gnomes tend to go wild, which is less cute than it sounds. To locate a queen, gnomes select the most beautiful female gnome with the most luxurious beard. (All gnomes have beards. That includes babies.) Queen Gnomes do everything in the forest, from resolving disputes between caterpillars to controlling berry trafficking. Unfortunately, because of their diet of pie and candy, queens are delicious meals themselves, and are usually eaten by foxes or boy scouts before they turn 200. Then the search begins again.”

“Every gnome generation has a town idiot, or Shmebulock. I interviewed one, and he said the word “Shmebulock” over and over before writing this on a chalkboard:”

[Using vinegere cipher “Shmebulock”] “MINE IS BUT A SOLITARY EXISTENCE. I READ. I PONDER. I STARE AT THE HEAVENS.

BOUNTEOUS IS OUR WORLD BUT CRUEL IS THE MASTER OF IT WHO CONDEMNED ME TO SAY BUT ONLY MY NAME.

PERHAPS MY ISOLATION IS MY GIFT. FOR IT IS ONLY IN SEPARATION FROM OTHERS THAT A MIND CAN TRULY BE FATE”

I’ll admit something here, folks. I tried about fifteen or twenty different words/phrases to unravel this. I used Shmebulock first, and it didn’t work – I actually resorted to looking on the GF wiki when I was absolutely stuck and couldn’t find or think of any secret keys hidden in the book. It turned out I just misspelled Shmebulock. :/

Edit - can’t believe I forgot about the Doors, too. (9_9)

Doors Page:  [underneath Door 13] “Ever wanted to see a chorus of children with no faces screaming in a black void? No? Then don’t open this door!” [underneath bottom left door] “This door is supposed to reveal how you’re going to die! When I opened it, I saw myself getting eaten - by ANOTHER CURSED DOOR!” 

[Underneath Right Hand door] “What’s behind Door #3? I’ve never opened it! I learned my lesson from the last one! Stay away fromt he door with the teeth on Maubert Ave!”

My Muse page:  I love this page, just because it’s kinda pretty. Maybe I just like the ominous glowing Bill rising from behind the mountains and a pretty crescent moon up there. Says “LIED TO ME! How could I ever have been so foolish?”

There’s “Saw this on an old scroll” pointing to the cluster of stars on the next page. Underneath that, it says “Out of all the idiots in the entire universe, why was I the one to fall prey to Bill’s villainy? If beings of such evil can exist in the cosmos, could there possibly be other beings of equal and opposite good? Or is the vast universe filled only with darkness? Some force compels me against reason to maintain hope…”

Wow. Dark.

Mothman:  (Underneath the photo) “I used venom from the glowing mantis to make my invisible ink. This stuff is beautiful, but technically poison. DON’T SNIFF THIS BOOK!” But I love that new-book smell! But I guess, if you say so…

Edit: (Underneath the blacklight ink) “Other Insectoids:  Venus Guy Trap: Will lure you into jaws with beefy jerky. Flatterpillar:  Giant grub compliments you constantly - but expects favors in return! “Man-Spider”:  I’ve still never seen one of these. GET ME PICTURES OF MAN-SPIDER!” 

(I still can’t believe I left off that gem!)

Soothsquitos: (Underneath the photo) “Spay away from bortals.” “Gibe the oracle your frone number.” “avoid dattoos.” “Jibberish! –Ford” (are the Soothsquitos hitting on Ford FOR the Oracle?!)

The Invisible Wizard page: [it is a lump of flesh with a face that takes the silhouette of a stereotypical wizard, and it looks kind of sad. Poor guy.] Pointing at the wand, it says “Wand? Or grotesque malformed hand?”  Underneath the title it says “F’s omnispectrascopic glasses have given me a better look at this monster. Wish they hadn’t. He must’ve leaked into our world from Bill’s weirdness dimension. And he’s not the only one! Not sure why I thought he was handsome before. Clearly my night-vision lenses were very smudged!”

Rude! >:/

Barf Fairies:  “Barf fairies are the only ones who can see the hideous invisible wizard. That’s why they’re always barfing!!!”

Stomach faced duck: ( I love that duck!) [Pictured is the duck puking some kind of intestine-like organ from its mouth. It’s gross.] Ford labeled this as “DISGUSTING” and “This is what happens when it opens its mouth! I don’t even know what this organ is supposed to do!”

“A Bit of History” page:  “Bill’s Secret History! Bill taught me that he “inspired” great minds throughout history. Now I know the truth! He tricked and terrorized great minds and history is littered with records of his treachery! Since time began, Bill has tried to trick people into building his portal, and he exacted his revenge when they failed. Notable people tricked by Bill:

“The Ancient Egyptians. Their primitive portal only worked for ten minutes (letting out a jackal-headed man from the nightmare realm). Bill was furious. He tormented them with nightmares, and they built giant stone tributes to Bill, hoping to make them stop. (The arms and top hats of these structures broke off over time.)” [Pictured is a drawing of Bill’s top hat, eye and arms over the pyramid, with a plain pyramid next to it.]

Well….what about the eye?? It’s pretty big… Did it just get eroded away…?

[I’ll save you the images of these, since there’s no doodles on them and it would take up a lot more space than necessary.]

“George Washington. Bill gave him secrets that helped him defeat the British. But when George’s attempt at a steam-powered portal sank into a swamp, Bill gave Washington such bad nightmares that he ground his teeth into dust in his sleep and then had to get wooden ones. Washington put Bill on the one-dollar bill in order to appease him.

“Stanley Kubrick. Bill helped Kubrick fake the US moon landing, hoping that, in return, Kubrick would convince NASA to build a functioning portal. When NASA rejected the proposal, Bill cursed Kubrick with bizarre nightmares, which, in an ironic twist, ended up helping him in his film career.

“Modoc the Wise. A Gravity Falls shaman who met a gruesome end when he ran afoul of Bill. He is thought to be the one who inscribed the incantation on the cave that brought Bill into my life. I am the latest in a long line of these foolish men, and it is my burden to avenge them all or lose my life trying.”

Great stuff….but how did he find all that out?

It’s not black-light, but look!!!! They included the map from Irrational Treasure!! It’s a little smaller than I thought it would be IRL, but hey, it looks amazing!

The Zombie page: [The drawing of the zombie glows! The other page is pictured exactly like it is in canon, with the skull getting sound-waves hit at it and chipping chunks out of it.] “Zombies have a weakness! Previously thought to be invincible, their skulls can be shattered by a perfect three-part harmony. (Learned this when a barbershop quartet came on the radio. This may be the first time anyone has been glad to hear a barbershop quartet.)”

Well if the “Third Researcher” theory wasn’t already horribly debunked, there’s more proof of it.

See you in part 2! 

[Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3]

WWEm - Back Like a Recurrent UTI

In response to a comment from a reader, which is frankly one comment more than I ever thought I’d get, I’m dropping the interline punctuation. Be aware I may be switching to Comic Sans next week though.

Transmission date: Monday 5/Tuesday 6 June 2017.

Coming at you off the back of Medium-Strength Rules, this is THURSDAY AFTERNOON RAW!

so yeah, extreme rules was kind of crap like, i don't need it to be all barbed wire rope exploding table deathmatches, but that was honestly tamer than a lot of episodes of raw it's like waiting a fortnight for a jalfrezi and getting a shitty mushroom dopiaza or something (that's the subtitle of the dvd release, btw) (Extreme Rules 2017: The Shitty Mushroom Dopiaza of Wrestling) kkb took the belts, though, so that's good at least in any case, i should probably stop using this blog to bitch about ppvs that we're not watching and actually watch the show just kidding, it's my blog, i can do whatever the fuck i want NEXT UP: THE HIGHLY EFFECTIVE HABITS OF SUCCESSFUL LEAFCUTTER ANTS (2017, 7hrs 41mins) *daniel starts raw* dang ah well we'll get back to that particular gem we kick off with a dramatic slideshow of an entirely undramatic two-chilli rules main event if you haven't been keeping up with the results, joe won by stealing a pin opportunity and choking finn to death i have genuinely no clue how they're going to build a joe/brock feud without turning one of them, which would make no sense and be bullshit were the hardyz in the title sequence before? i am very unobservant, so it's possible jesus fuck, guys, you don't need to keep weaponising the pyro to see what i say we're back in the mohegan sun later, joe talks about life but now, here comes a bray to chop off your head or possibly declaim some eschatological craziness could be both who knows i'm wearing a SanItY shirt, i don't give a shit aww, apparently he's here to fight roman disappointing can he chop roman's head off? booker's still on announce, which is weird given that otunga was around to be on the pico de gallo rules preshow panel ok, bray's got a mic so at least we get some preaching before roman gets here apparently sunday was the beginning of the end, because bray will not be there to slay the beast because he was stabbed through the eye with his own sword of salvation but he's fine, because he's still a god (i'm not even paraphrasing) he's here to pass judgment on the guilty which includes basically everybody who isn't him he mentions roman, the arena roof levitates on the cloud of boos he's vowed to personally punish everyone, starting with roman now oh, and here he is personally, i would not enter a room with a man who had just levelled that particular bit of demagoguery at me but hey, i'm not roman reigns loving the guy on hardcam with the I CAME TO BOO ROMAN sign so did everyone else, it seems apocalyptic cult leader and self-proclaimed god vs big taciturn punch man which way is the heel/face divide even meant to go in this situation enormous boos, roman takes bray's mic, boos redouble apparently this kind of public hate is why roman is the guy sure, why not better than proclaiming yourself the BIG FIGHT man cannot tweet roman coldcocks bray, start the match bray nearly lands sister abigail within about six seconds that would have been fucking hilarious although it kind of feels like maybe bray should have a new finisher to fit this whole bringing judgment upon the guilty thing or maybe that's just my overly-narrative booking instincts who can say (that is definitely what it is) fuck off, daniel i'll rescind your fruit bowl privileges bray avoids a samoan drop through the incredibly advanced tactic of punching roman in the head repeatedly that's the kind of tactical nous you only get by anointing yourself with the burnt grave earth of your diabolic mistress as the saying goes did we really need to cut to that enormously wide shot where the camera's on the other side of a lighting rig several astronomical units away from the ring? like, we get that the mohegan sun's big no need to prove this at the expense of beign able to see shit if i wanted to watch insects wrestle while i shine a torch into one of my eyes, i could do that at home i'm going off on tangents a lot here because this match is slow as fuck roman is still creeped out to the point of a nearfall by bray's spiderwalk goes for a pin off an uranage, then takes roman to the top rope we could be here a while he does a few punches, roman headbutts him for longer than would seem necessary before turning it into a powerbomb roman cocks his hand, takes a couple tries to hit bray what happens if he cocks his hand and doesn't do anything with it? does he have to punch something to get rid of it before it goes off accidentally? or can he rack his forearm to eject a loaded fist? enquiring minds want to know anyway, while that muse was visiting me, bray heard roman going oooooooo and rolled out, took a driveby but punched roman's head off so it seems my earlier proposal was correct huh i can call murders better than matches bray goes for sister abigail, roman reverses into a superman punch and a really slow spear for the pin so yeah that happened meanwhile, someone in the crowd has leveraged all their crafting skills to make a sign informing us that BROCK LESNAR IS TICKLISH corey invents the adjective 'slaughterous' yeah, ok bray deserves new words end segment later on, we have joe doing a thing but next, we talk about the shitshow that was the 'extreme' women's title match "But can Bayley get EXTREEEEEME?" "No." but now, we have charly interviewing enzo and cass enzo's conscious, which is a change charly asks enzo about their match tonight with enzo and cass, he responds by creeping on charly and insulting corey's hair cass is insulted by the rumours that he was attacking his bro, promises to watch his back at all times and then they leave, and enzo returns to creep on charly alone good backwatching, colin what if charly was the mystery assailant it makes so much sense anyway, now we have a dull slideshow of the dull women's title match and photos of the one welt on bayley's back, which has made her take the night off somebody send jericho to talk to her in his curtain room/office, kurt is confused by his phone and here is alexa to present terms she wants a celebration of her entire life tonight because the this is your life segment went down so well outstanding kurt immediately comes back like fuck no that's an awful idea this is your life was dreadful and anyway you owe nia a title shot tonight alexa is none too pleased and slightly shellshocked but here's dean, aka 33% of the best bit of semi-notable rules and now, here's a very large man on a stool dressed entirely in scarves and fragments of scarves, with a song he wrote after seeing a leaf fall on the side of the highway

actual quote

it's a song about how dean sucks, basically

with a subtext about how elias deserves a title shot

dean's music interrupts it

it's an elias segment, so corey is SO ANGRY

dean does his hey dude hold on a second i just want to PUNCH thing

hits him until he goes away, and demands a title rematch but here's miz on the tron, like fuck no he's wearing a bow tie for the kickoff celebration of the ic title comeback tour and elias blindsides dean into his swinging neckbreaker and shouts at him, because sometimes you just gotta but up next, samoa joe the mohegan sun fans need something to cheer, or they're going to riot but first, dean storms backstage runs into kurt, asks for a ref in miz's dressing room kurt's like no, we've got a party planned and i'm scared of maryse, please go away no dean, don't go to miz's dressing room so kurt ejects him from the building it is just heel city so far oh hey, it's joe funny, that because the prevailing heel archetype at the moment is apparently 'large samoan man named joe' first shot of the match card graphics for great balls of fire, and it looks like shit if you're making a title graphic, maybe don't put a flashy effect around the word BALLS in the centre joe thinks brock ain't shit and wants to take everything he owns including his cushy non-wrestling schedule i think we all want brock's ability to draw a salary and have fans without doing shit joe also wants paul heyman, just for giggles oh hey, paul didn't see you there (largely because you were backstage and i don't have camera control) paul does his usual spiel, and still needs to check the definition of 'defending' does his usual thing of hi joe aren't you awesome can i come into your ring sir please don't hurt me but btw my client also thinks you yourself ain't shit does a soliloquy about worrying for a living, turns it into a jew joke sigh addresses the fact that brock/finn would have been a great story, while brock/joe is just going to be two large angry men trying to shoot kill each other paul does his usual great job of hyping both people in this match you're great, but my client's better paul shakes hands with joe, tries to leave, joe grabs him again and has an earnest face-to-face conversation he's so well-spoken he's like hey paul i understand you're just a legal representative but jsyk i'm about to choke the life out of you and this is exactly what it's going to feel like and then he does calm joe is the most intimidating joe refs get involved, but not until paul goes limp the crowd are unsure how to react to this assault joe shouts at the crowd some more, then leaves and we cut to ads on the sight of paul on the floor and we come back backstage, with kurt like THE FUCK DID YOU JUST DO at joe who's like i don't know would you like me to demonstrate loooooooom but here comes seth to shout at joe and intervene also he has a new merch vest to show off kurt's like hey this sounds like a good match this booking shit is easy joe sidles off with a dark look, end thing but now we have slater and rhyno facing the kkb with the former's entrance being helpfully played under the announce team talking earnestly about joe the announcers and graphics team need to decide whether they're sheamus and cesaro or cesaro and sheamus dramatic slideshow of the cage match, making it make even less sense lovely closeup of jeff's post-dive 'holy fuck why do i still do this to myself' face bell rings, instead of getting out of the ring, cesaro creates an novel distraction by running across the ring and sliding out in the opponents' corner while sheamus commences to beating the piss out of heath slater knocks them both down, goes for a hot tag, cesaro pulls rhyno off the apron, brogue for the pin so that was a thing i'll be honest, i just love seeing them with the belts and they get mic spots awesome sheamus is like hey guys look like we know how to do this wrestling thing who knew are you all happy the hardyz came back well then you're all twats you know who isn't happy they came back? the hardyz, who basically ain't shit they reiterate their claim to be the bar, cue music and celebration but here's tjp backstage runs into neville oh so coincidentally like congrats, but where the fuck is my title shot neville does his usual patience, young one thing, tjp will no longer take this shit neville is a man of his word, and he'll give tj his shot if he takes care of mustafa next cut for ads, and here's that match tj's straight in with the slightly excessive aggression, tries to crush ali's face across the corner with his foot and then a bunch of cool spots happen faster than i can type about them but that should go without saying, really thanks for slowing things down with that really long rest headlock, tj mustafa does his lovely top rope twist torndo ddt, tries for the inverted 450, tj reverses into a detonation kick for the pin again with the really short matches mustafa deserves better tj swaggers up the ring, neville's crazy pyro hits, he basically shits himself, it's hilarious he's like i'm sorry my apprentice, i talked to kurt but we can't have a match tonight i tried tj shouts at him, storms off, so he blindsides him and beats the shit out of him on the stage and then says he can have his shot tomorrow on 205 i say 'says', more 'northernly rants' cut for ads, and we come back with another shattered dreams production goldust's like excuse you did you steal my format and my chair it is ON motherfucker promises to bring the whole movie industry into his coming golden age how this will interact with bray's prophesied apocalypse is unclear but now, in the women's locker room, mickie and dana congratulate sasha on her dance moves alexa comes in, sasha nopes out of the room and alexa's like hey girls what do you think about nia cutting in line for the title what a bitch right dana and mickie are like lol no we'll be at ringside laughing at you announce spot, and kurt appears to call corey away for urgent business involving gesturing at his phone and looking annoyed i have no clue what all this is building to if there's been foreshadowing, i've missed it cole tries to ask him what that's all about, corey's like OH WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT kalisto's here he's lost the aggressively sculpted dragon mask, back to more of an nxt-era lucha dragons thing back in mexican colours and everything whatever happened to el local ...okay, i totally did not know he was ricardo rodriguez i wouldn't have known who that was back when i started watching nxt, to be fair thanks, internet huh anyway, back on the show, ...mike? ambushes kurt backstage to ask what the fuck's going on with those emails or w/e he uses slightly more professional language, because he's talking to his boss while i'm screaming semi-informed obscenities into the formless void of the internet kurt's like nope, anonymous dude, this is private and walks out of the arena and dean sneaks in the door just before it closes dean ambrose: back like a recurrent uti (his disappointing third album) and as we watch him come in, the revival just happen to be in the back of the shot caught it that time i pay attention sometimes but now it's kalisto/titus or actually titus knocking kaliso down and then shouting at apollo also tozawa is watching because titus wants him on the brand kalisto gets a rollup holding titus' trunks, apollo's like welp guess you asked for that one boss does some light motivational slapping, end segment but here are miz and maryse, even more dapper than usual and pan over to big cass, collapsed under a bunch of girders and shit enzo comes running in like whoa what happened way to stay together, guys cass presents enzo with a tacky chain that he presumably took off his attacker, enzo hugs his bro as we cut to ads and we come back on enzo being like okay well this is clearly a frame job and btw we have a match so can cass wrestle or what the answer is no but now we're back in the ring, with carpet and champagne and balloons and maryse and a guy in a teddy bear suit with a sign says CONGRATULATIONS who is totally not dean ambrose no sir but seriously, miz must fucking love balloons this ring is at imminent risk of lifting off and here is the man himself and a dramatic slideshow of the actually-great match complete with the nicest ref ever but yes, miz and maryse both look fucking great tonight just saying surprising number of you deserve it chants miz is immediately like fuck off you chant that for everyone just reminding us he's still a heel and all but yes, i do deserve it and here's a speech about how i'm redeeming the ic belt a toast to me "Ladies and gentlemen, please raise a glass...or, if you're in this arena, a styrofoam cup..." delivered perfectly miz thanks maryse for all this stuff, mentions the bear, she's like um i thought you ordered the bear then who's flying the plane so miz attacks the bear on principle and finales him welp, that bear's dead dramatically unmasks him, revealing...some dude he's like ...um, well at least you had a brush with celebrity, get out of here *whips him out of the ring* and now here comes a big present down the ramp miz is like well isn't this nice what could this be grabs a chair, beats the shit out of the present while maryse shouts at him to stop and it's a very dead grandfather clock and a very sad maryse tells mike he ruined the party, throws the mic at him, storms off and we are left with a very dejected miz, blaming dean for all his problems and having a paranoid breakdown at the crowd and the steadicam guy who's been following miz throughout takes his headset and hat off and hits miz with dirty deeds lovely slow realisation as the camera feed went up on the tron dean swigs some champagne, takes the bottle and leaves okay, that was really well done but now, we see enzo wandering dejectedly backstage looking for a partner and now we see the family who have good seats because of pizza including the wonderfully-named Enzo Shirtz but yes gallows and anderson are in the ring and here comes enzo all on his onesie does his intro, but it's not the same without a large man gesticulating behind him does his 4G well-connected joke again get new material, dude but he's found himself a new seven-foot man it's a biiiiiig shooooooooow although it would have been amazing if it was braun big show stands in the middle of the ring like what is this tiny rodent enzo tries to give him a pep talk with some semi-coherent jokes mixed in show has progressed from 'bemused' to 'angered' this is the most awkward thing, and i could not do it justice without rubbing a buttered weasel on the keyboard and...now show is doing a joisey-accented monologue with an extended ice age reference before spelling it out for them? what the fuck is in this drink well, the match has started, so i guess the talking can stop bell rings, anderson kicks enzo's soul out of his body standard swift hot tag to show, who...does all the normal show stuff chokeslam to anderson, into badaboomshakalaka except in the form of show military pressing enzo and then just rhowing him straight at anderson well, that was a thing that happened? lasted about 90 seconds anyway next up, women's title match but here are zo and show backstage run into cass, who's like hey funny how show disappears for weeks and then he's back when you need a partner casts suspicion about show being the culprit, enzo wants to give him a ride, but cass takes him away and now let's have a terrible blaxploitation segment full of film references yup but now mike? interviews alexa in the curtain room he asks if she regrets giving nia this shot, she's like i regret this show fuck off faceless dude and back to the arena, here's nia

cut to ads, and...now a weird bit where every version of this i can find appears to have overwritten the entire women's match with the elias segment from earlier the fuck, internet apparently it was pretty much what you might have thought - nia stomped all over alexa, dana and mickie pointed and laughed, and then alexa went and started a fight with those two for a dq win i would have liked to watch that, but guess that's not happening back to the actual show just in time for a graphic for the cruiserweight title match thank fuck i didn't miss that and apparently brock will be here next week i repeat, the champion will be on the show he supposedly leads novel idea so yes, here's everyone's favourite towel-sporting middle-aged-man-strangler and also seth, who didn't try to murder a doughy guy in a suit today bell rings, joe just gets down to punching seth's face in before even taking off his towel seth goes for a suicide dive, joe roundhouse kicks him as he comes out of the ropes, because he is way more flexible than he really should be this match is 10% seth doing cool cruiserweighty shit and 90% joe's hundred flavours of NOPE seth does a sling blade into a suicide dive, and it actually works this time and into a blockbuster because why stop at one signature and as i type that, there goes another suicide dive and then into a falcon arrow, as seth goes fuck you i can do strength spots seth goes up to the top rope, wyatt cut because fuck you lights go back up, seth looks around for a bray who is very much not here, joe blindsides him and coquina clutch until death and we fade on seth bleeding, joe strutting, WOMP WOMPing, and an entirely unnecessary reminder that brock'll be here next week do you have to ruin everything, wwe (don't answer that) smackdown will probably follow tomorrow, after i've gone and been an instrument of democracy but in the meantime, let me tell you about these ants -------------------- And if you enjoyed that, we hope you'll be back next week for our seminar on Following Pheromone Trails In An Increasingly Odoriferous World. right, now that that's done, it's probably time for some FRIDAY AFTERNOON SMACKDOWN! (i apologise in advance for any political jokes that slip through) (it's been a tough few days) and we open on a dramatic retelling of the women's five-way last week so yeah, women's mitb is probably going to be the big story this week i've had some of this show spoiled, but i honestly can't remember what, so that's sorted itself out and we're back in the present, and here come the shaney and also the five contenders are in the ring already and one of them's brought their creeper charlotte is looking ridiculously overdressed in her black sequin robe seven words in, shane gets a cheap pop in shane starts introducing them all, calls tamina "a two-time superstar" the fuck does that even mean the crowd love charlotte, but they love becky more apparently we're having a six-woman tag match later because why not have the entire division in the ring *again* drumroll as shane reveals the case it's basically the same, except silver and with some extra detailing on the logo no pink, thank fuck shane has a monologue about how dangerous the mitb match is, like he totally does with the men claims whoever has won this in the past has become champion somewhere, damien sandow is crying ellsworth calls shane out for mansplaining the mitb match, carmella gets a monologue until charlotte shouts her down leans on the genetic superiority thing, offers the other four a chance at brushing against greatness somehow a face? nattie calls her out for ripping off her father, proceeds to do the same to her uncle becky calls her on this, promises to rip off everybody's arms should be worth watching tamina gets to say words, which is novel but here comes naomi gets to do her whole entrance, because fuck this argument i'm the champ hypes the match like dang i wish i was allowed to be in this INTERRUPTING TRASH SAX lana is actually here in person (why do i like this music what is wrong with me) struts down the ramp, everyone in the ring just standing there like um fuck the what shane's like um hi? btw i was trying to do a thing, why are you in my ring shit, she's still russian and weirdly propositioning shane while also asking for a spot in the mitb match naomi just bursts out laughing like do you even go here why do you get to be in this match when you've had like none ever lana claims she can beat naomi, i smell a match for later shane's like seriously this is not how this show works lana has a tantrum in russian, flounces off up the ramp a+ flounce the crowd are loving her shane's like RIGHT back to the actual show that i run let's have this tag match Pun Murderer, FluoroTwerk and Queen Bitch vs Wrestling Mom, Thug Girl (and Douchey), and Obligatory Samoan lots of spots happened while i was working that out, but the gist is it's pretty even so far currently becky is alligator rolling carmella around the ring with her legs there's my thing i haven't seen before for the week apparently carmella taking the briefcase would be "like moving from HD televisions back to nanotubes" i'm going to go out on a limb and say jbl doesn't understand how science works interference by nattie and ellsworth lets tamina hot tag in and grind becky to pulp nattie tags in so she can walk over becky and taunt her teammates she'd be a much more effective wrestler with more wrestling naomi and carmella both hot tag in, the champ commences to cleaning house including three short-arm leg lariats to tamina because hey, if you can manage those, why not throw a bunch in nattie and tamina both come in to interfere, and here's lana to loom on the ramp and knock naomi off the apron, letting tamina superkick her for the pin stands at ringside looking smug like yes i did do that the fuck you gonna do and we go backstage, where shane runs into the andre the giant trophy mid-phone call like the fuck is this horrible public art and here's mojo to address the fact that he won that match and then nothing else fucking ever and be like should i maybe have been in the mitb match being the only person that's beaten jinder on smackdown and all shane offhandedly mentions luke harper, the crowd go wild shane's giving mojo a match against jinder to qualify for the ladder match because as ever, shane books this shit about twenty seconds in advance later we have owens/nakamura but next, styles/ziggler again and weirdly, by 'next', we don't mean 'after someone from the last segment has an encounter backstage' for once here is aj now they still don't want none although by the sound of the crowd, rochester, NY don't not want none dolph enters, recap video of dolph going over aj last week which i had totally forgotten looking more closely at the men's briefcase, the logo detailing's the same so yeah, it's just the colour that's different bell rings, we start going old-school mat wrestling turns out dolph has amateur technical skills that aren't just assaults to the crotch and also, he can dropkick you in the face dolph goes for the most blatant dirty pin, gets caught just before 3 and then a famouser actually connects for a nearfall i tend to rag on them repeating matches, but hey, this is a good match slow superplex setup actually resolves in an interesting way dolph counters a phenomenal forearm into another dirty pin attempt, aj reverses into a styles clash with like no setup, gets the pin because we're actually respecting finishers for the moment and from that to more fashion files noir tyler has a gritty monologue about the connections between prison and the catwalk and narrates himself looking at their clue board fandango returns from taking the cologne to the boys in the lab, only to find out that there's no boys and no lab, so he just tasted it himself as you do

and then this leads into the two of them repeatedly saying a mixture of 'cologne', 'colón' and 'clone' at each other with an increasing sense of incredulity this is like a fucking two ronnies sketch and i love it tyler finally gets it or not nor does fandango, which obviously means they must be close tyler offers a hopeful "Colóse?" and we cut to the new day and their ice cream cart what is life but still with the noir saxophone soundtrack they've come to the fashion police office and are bemused by how they turn black and white as they enter the new day have a case for them, the police say they'll take it, except the new day can't hear them because they're still speaking in their shared noir internal monologue and i am falling apart here big e is uncomfortable with how they're just staring at him but he's got them both rompers carried in his singlet, obviously fandango is not impressed "Listen, Big E, if that's even your real initial..." line of the night right there fandango is offended because they don't take bribes pan over to tyler, who is already wearing his like hey they're fashionable screw you the new day want intel on the usos for mitb breezango hand them five file boxes pull out a hoodie, ask the new day what they know about day one and why it is h xavier is trying so hard not to corpse the fashion police take the case, sax sting, they freeze frame until the new day are like ummmmmmm we'll just go while their noir monologue starts a 'new case rocks' chant that was amazing and you have no idea how many times i had to pause it to type but back in normality...oh wait, it's mojo i still can't hear his music without my brain adding zack's parts and here's a video to tell us that cena's coming back on july 4th, because of course he fucking is i thought jinder's music was different to usual but it's the singhs doing ring announce for jinder in english and punjabi and there's the music i was expecting i really like the ramp graphics they do for his entrance and he remains jacked as fuck somewhere in america, heath slater is watching smackdown and nxt and developing an inferiority complex it's just occurred to me that jinder's and aj's entrances have basically the same beat and structure somebody make me that mashup maybe this entrance is just they don't want none in punjabi that would be amazing i love how they've given jinder a properly long entrance with some gravitas and just generally how seriously they're taking him as a champion mojo is getting the upper hand with the power of HYPE (always upper case) every time jinder rolls out of the ring, the singhs are like omg boss are you ok can i get you a drink and they just have long arguments in punjabi and don't even try and let the average american in on it a singh distracts mojo and lets jinder just jump on his head a bunch doesn't take, because that's never where mojo keeps his brain flurry of offence later, jinder gets an eye rake in and khalass for the pin decent match by two underrated performers jinder's veins seem to have calmed down a bit too, which is reassuring jinder has a mic, the population of rochester is not pleased oh, fuck off your usa chants promises to kill randy and crush his dreams at mitb, leans on the hometown angle again proclaims himself the antidote to randy orton, and by extension america and then does a promo in punjabi, pissing off americans because america another hype bit for owens/nakamura and a video about how cool shinsuke is and somebody painting a protrait of him this video is basically all showmanship, but that's totally appropriate he's great in the ring, but that's not why people love him but next, the new day actually fight and they keep saying it's owens/nakamura 'for the first time ever' i have gifs that disagree but now, randy is backstage renee comes in to ask what he thinks about jinder's promo apparently he's been getting calls from ric flair, harley race and his dad, telling him to let jinder talk and then fuck him up so that's what he's going to do sure, that's compelling interview work but actually now, it's the new day v the colóns they're still throwing boxes of cereal into the crowd and pouring them on fans, because fuck your health and safety it's xavier/e, because this isn't a serious match so naturally, jbl goes off on a tangent about operation overlord this is 90% the colóns taking all the new day spots you know and love xavier and e do the ab stretch/spank thing at the same time, xavier somehow gets francesca ii turbo despite having a match to wrestle in a side note, primo's gone and shaved, so now i have no clue which colón is which xavier does a huge missile dropkick on epico, double hot tag and big e proceeds to annihilate primo xavier does a casual tope con giro, primo tries for a pin from the distraction, fails because fuck you we're the new day, blind tag into midnight hour for the pin their post-match celebration is interrupted by the usos' aggressive music they're here to talk trash at the new day and do their prison thing, astonishingly and they have shitty misogynistic jokes about the new day and jimmy's paranoia monologue i do like that they're doing all this mic work, but can we maybe not be offensive to marginalised groups shot of kevin taping his wrists backstage, but here's dasha in the curtain room with sami asking how he's preparing for mitb he's been watching lots of matches, basically and he has no idea how to get a handle on shinsuke slippery bastard sami tries to do some of shinsuke's moves, it doesn't go well so he's going to be on announce for owens/nakamura for research purposes baron looms into the room, coldcocks sami then hits him with a ladder like stop thinking about shinsuke don't you love me and then pushes him into a convenient pile of ladders and says he's taking the announce spot cut to shane on the phone like i am literally watching the show what the shit was that why do i keep that enormous douchebag around man spends a lot of time in expository phone calls (says the woman narrating the entire show on the internet) but here's naomi to ask for a match with lana at mitb shane's like seriously you have no clue how busy i am right now naomi lobbies harder, puts the title on the line after saying lana doesn't deserve a title shot because she hasn't earned it? does the bald-snatching line, end segment and now main event time here's kevin good sweeping shot of the ring apron and floor, wrong steadicam guy #smackdownediting ad for talking smack, with aj, mojo, and lana and tjp telling us to watch 205 becuse he's awesome [citation needed] claims you can't stab someone in the back if they're standing in front of you tjp has clearly never heard of the concept of elbows baron's on announce great the two facts they put on shinsuke's sidebar are literally 'from kyoto' and 'former nxt superstar' fascinating but what do i care, i'm busy watching him in his studded tabard that everybody will be wearing in the future bell rings, shinsuke does his oh did you want a tieup i'm just going to kick you in the knees baron talks about his storied history of fucking sami up nobody cares, you balding twat kevin has briefly tried to take shinsuke on at the kicking game, failed, and returned to mastering headlocks shinsuke's kicked off a comeback with a lovely single leg dropkick nearfall off his knees to the corner baron acknowledges that shinsuke is dangerous, my no shit alarm is destroying my eardrums (daniel, can you please take the batteries out of that) baron's still trying to talk smack about kevin, but his particular brand of smack is just shite meanwhile, reverse exploder to kinshasa for the win a lightly underwhelming main event, tbh, but shinsuke's clearly been holding back on the in-ring stuff since moving up which makes perfect sense shinsuke does his poses, corbin runs in to end of days him so hard his stupid hat comes off crowd are not best pleased i'm mostly just concerned as to why he's dressed like the second-rate pot dealer at every college (baron, that is) (i would love it if people at my college dressed like shinsuke) and we fade on baron awkwardly posing at the top of the ramp and having no idea what do with his arms halfhearted shimmy as the show ends and now i'm off to watch talking smack and make shitty political jokes you can't stop me you're not my real dad (one of you reading this is my real dad and can stop me) (also possibly daniel's uncle, if he actually reads this) (memo to self: stop antagonising authority figures for literally no reason)

My 2nd adventure at #ONCEVAN

So on March 24th to March 26th, 2017 I was a volunteer staff member for Creation Entertainment’s #OUATVAN convention in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. When you volunteer for a Creation Entertainment convention you get a couple perks, one is free admission to the show (well, that’s a no brainer.) The second is free autographs of all of the actors/ celebrities appearing that weekend (total score!!) and the third.. one free photo op per day you work. So, I was given three free ops from the start, I chose Gil McKInney (what a cutie!! And great at Karaoke!!); Beverly Elliot (how much I love Granny, it’s ridiculous) and Karen David (I love Princess Isabella (Galavant) and I originally chose Elliot Knight but his work prevented him from being there.. colour me sad.. but Karen’s an excellent substitution.) I also because I worked panels, got to watch the panels (but if you want spoilers, find a panel on youtube, I’m not sharing that much.. wink wink..) But mid day one after Mr Adam Croasdell (totally hottie, Hook’s dad…) finished his photo ops, I realized I could have another photo op for free. I found my supervisor after my fellow volunteers in my area had a conversation.. Michael or Lee, Sorry Michael (you are absolutely absolutely lovely… but..) I picked Lee. ‘ello Poppet! Wins the day. So that was my free ops: Beverly, Gil, Karen and Lee. I paid for two ops … Jennifer Morrison (my favourite actress of course) and Captain Swan themselves.. Colin O’Donoghue and Jennifer Morrison.). The price tag was hefty ($344 CAN for the two ops, but I didn’t cry that much when my credit card bill came in because.. it’s fricking Captain Swan.. you’d do it too..)

So anyways, my volunteer experience… On Thursday I came into town and met my friend Meagan at the airport. We were both volunteering. Thursday night we worked Merchandise table with a girl named Dawn who was selling her tee shirts, bags, and mugs. I bought my Hooked shirt from her. Great lady, nice stuff. I got to meet some wonderful fans during pre-registration. The fans are the best thing after the cast being there, I adore meeting other fans.. they are just so wonderful. Friday came around and we met our supervisor Jackie who was great. We got our volunteer shirts and free coffee and doughnuts (score!!) On Friday, I worked Registration. Volunteers Martin and Michelle showed me the ropes.. I volunteered last year but did Panel doors.. so Martin showed me tricks to get registration done super quick. Working registration was a lot of fun but had some icing on that cake.. Us at registration got a little behind the scenes that no one else gets.. For one, Michael Coleman, our Happy, visited us many times that day and I got to talk to him about his shirts.. He wore a shirt that said Heigh Ho on the back (kept it on for Karaoke that night), and he changed shirts like three times. He was very bubbly, funny and you know, happy. His daughters and wife came into the show as well. We put wristbands on his daughters. His oldest changed into a Snow White Costume and he walked around holding her hand. I swear it was the best thing that day.. until Karaoke… that is. I heard that he brought her onto stage with him as he was the MC. But I didn’t see it happen. His baby girl wore the cutest little hair bow, I go bonkers over cute baby accessories, they are too cute. His wife was super nice, and the whole family is ridiculously blonde, blue eyed and adorable. The second behind the scenes we got was when Chris Gauthier came up (super nice guy btw) and I smiled and said Hi, how are you and he goes Great, and how are you? I go great, thank you!  And he asked for his table as he popped in to the show for the day. Chris is actually a local actor (raised in BC) and was doing an autograph table. He was very warm and bubbly every time he walked by me and chatted with me. He also did photos with fans, but I didn’t think to ask.. Oops. On Friday I had my photo op with Gil McKinney, (he plays Prince Eric.) He was very warm. When I went up, I said Hi, I’m Sarah and he had his arms posed to take me into a hug, so all I had to do was step into them and hug him back. Hug, smile for camera, snap and done and of course the thank you. Easy smeasy. Friday after dinner, Meagan and I hit Karaoke. We got front row centre but since my cousin showed up as well, I moved into the second row with him and Meagan was in front of me. Sadly my camera took lousy photos but I did get a couple videos. The Karaoke started off with Chris, Raphael, Michael and Adam singing (OMG!) Backstreet Boys “I want it that way..” Way to ruin me guys, I love that song.. the only way it would have been better is if Gil sang too.. Wow! Then Beverly and Karen came out and sang Girls Just wanna have fun. It was an absolute treat. That’s when they opened it up to the fans who signed up. I swear Michael danced or sang along with almost every fan that came up. He has some moves and he was seriously cracking me up the entire time. Beverly sang some solos (she’s fantastic,) as did Gil. The best parts besides Michael’s dancing, and those two fantastic songs, was when they brought a little girl onto the stage with them and sang the time of your life. And Adam moves to the end and we are of course right where Karen came to run to jump into Adam’s arms for the life. But you see his face go oh no and she runs back and then he goes okay, and puts his hands out. They literally did the Time of Your Life lift totally improvised and it was perfect. I got a photo of it on my IG but its not the best (as I said, crappy camera!) Another great moment was when a fan starred singing Part of your world and I think its the part where she sings But who cares, no big deal, I want more.. You see Gil slip onto stage, And he starts mimicking the song in pantomime and strutting a bit. I was laughing the entire time while video taping it. (Video also on my IG). And my video camera breaks off and he starts singing along with her. But, the best best best (yes I needed three bests for this) part was when Sarah McCulloch *you must know her as Sarah the leaf lady*, came onto the stage, and of course the crowd goes wild. She’s head banging, air guitaring, God the woman is hilarious. She even ran down to front row and we smacked her hand and she did fist pumps “yeah!!”. Best thing ever. I got back to the hotel that night with cheeks that hurt. But at the end, they called us volunteers to the stage (traumatizing I know) and had us sing Be our Guest. I literally forgot the middle part and couldn’t see the screen as it was at an angle.. so I’m right across the angle from Karen and was using her for the words. OOPS, I know the first two verses and the last one but the rest just gravitated from my memory the second I get to stage.. But then Karen started doing a rockettes, sadly the girl next to me wouldn’t join in and kind of kicked me while we were doing it but hey, i sang on stage with Beverly and Karen.. boo yah! Anways.. Saturday I was a floater and I did gold panel doors (Jen and Colin’s panel), Merchandise table and panel crowd control. (The job I kept for the rest of the weekend..) I got to watch Jen and Colin’s second panel. He was very bashful. I could sense his social anxiety was getting the best of him (poor guy). He kept displaying his nervous ticks throughout the panel (Scratching his ear, shifting in his seat, etc) and Jen probably picked up on this as their panel was together and she answered most of the questions. They have a really good relationship, you could see their bond showing through on stage. I loved that. I did see parts of Karen and Keegan’s panel but I was moving around a lot. Saturday I got my photo ops with Lee,Jen and Colin, Jen alone and Karen, One of the perks of volunteering is that you get to be in the line right after the VIP people.. For Lee, it was easy, I went up and said Hello and introduced myself, gave him a hug and took the photo. Easy as pie. Then I had Jen and Colin duo. I would have preferred to meet Jen alone first but oh well. When I was in line for the duo op, there was a lot of tension in the room and for some reason the volunteers were not very nice (very rude…) As you may or may not know, Colin broke his foot very recently. For his solo photo ops, he was sitting on a stool for them. So Jen and Colin’s photo op, he’s on the stool. Jen came up and put her arm on his shoulder with her hand on her cheek.. super cute moment, I wish I could have taken a photo of that.. Jen then took her puppy Ava in her arms as the dog came into the room with her. Then the photographer said something to her and she gave Ava to the dog handler. The VIP girls (absolutely fabulous ladies) all went up and then they brought in a girl in a wheelchair. When she came to the front of the line, Colin removed the stool hobbling over to the photographer to give it to him and then limped back to the x. *OH MY GOD, the face he made and how he hobbled broke my heart..* And from that point on he did his photos standing up. When I got to the front 6 people later, they already configured a pose where Colin barely had to move. I was pushed into place ( I said they were rude, didn’t i?) And then I said Hi to Jen and Colin. Jen said a very bubbly hi back and pulled me into the pose for the camera. They both wrapped their arms around me and we did the photo. Then as the camera snapped, I looked at both of them, Colin, then Jen and said thank you so much. And Jen smiled and said You are so welcome. (Colin was very tired and didn’t say anything or I just didn’t hear him say anything).  And then I stepped out of the x and moved to the side. I saw Ava though. And moved to the corner of the room and said Ava? And her handler said yes. And I came a little closer and called “Ava” and she jumped up and almost ran towards me but a rude volunteer came over and told me in a more nice way than saying the words but GET OUT. I said to her, I’m just saying hello to the dog and she said I don’t care, you have to go. So I rolled my eyes at her and then grabbed my bag and left. But by the time I got out I was so peeved. First one volunteer keeps yelling at us standing in line. Then she pushes me at Jen. And then her co-volunteer tells me to get out. I paid so much money for that photo.. ugh. I steamed for about 15 minutes.. Thank god the photo itself was fantastic. Props to Christopher the photographer who was very professional and fantastic. I got my Jen and Karen ops after. First Jen, where it was a bit calmer in the photo op room. I walked up to her and said, Hi, I’m Sarah and she smiled, I give her a hug because I adore her. And then I said I’m a big fan, thank you, and she said thank you so much. And then I step aside and leave. I love my photo with Jen too. She was very warm, bubbly and kind. She gives good hugs. :) The last photo of the day was Karen. I love Karen. So me, and a fan waiting in line Mikayla, are both big Galavant fans. So we started singing It’s a Good Day to Die right in the Photo Op room. I have no idea if Karen noticed. Oh well. But as I get up to the front. I said Hi, I’m Sarah. She smiled at me. So I said “I know you are Jasmine on Once” (she goes okay, so serious) and I continue “But I love Isabella” (Cue big grin). She gives me a hug and of course I hug her back. Cue Photo. Then I tell her” It’s a good die to die, but I forgot my spatula.” She then has her fake serious face on and points her finger at me and goes “next time” in a deep voice. And I go “I will,” very seriously. And she does it again with her eye brows furrowed.. “Next time.” And then we both laugh and I said but of course.  And then I move out of the spot and she meets the next person. Absolutely lovely. I kind of squashed her in the photo, but she liked my tweet of our photo, so I think we’re good. Saturday night, I didn’t have to do autograph lines, so I waited while Meagan, lucky Meagan did Gil’s autograph line. He showed up 20 minutes late, only had ten people in line, but when he started to leave, a group of girls came up and hugged him. So I went up and said that I thought he was wonderful on stage. He takes my hand and squeezes it (after a hug and high five at karaoke, this is still a big deal people!!!), and says thank you with a smile. Aww, he’ll win me over so easy, that man. Sunday came in much too early. We got to the hotel at 8:15 am. I was put on Panel Crowd control all day Sunday. I got to watch Lana and Bex’s gold panel and regular panel. During Bex’s panels, she spent the time making seriously cheeky comments that made us laugh so hard. Her expressions are both adorable and comical and she is just so wonderful on stage. During Lana’s gold panel, she came out with her cell phone and took a photo of the crowd. I might be in the photo, but I haven’t found it online yet. She was very passionate and absolutely loves her fans. She came to the edge of the stage when a little girl wanted to ask a question, and crouched down low to talk to her. She just has such a big heart. And at the end of her gold panel, she snuck back stage and stole a bowl of chocolate kisses for the cast and threw them to the fans. She said I can’t give you all kisses, so I can give you chocolate kisses. So she kept throwing the kisses out until she ran out. But there was two children in the audience, that came up, and she had them come to the front, and she gave them each a kiss and some goldfish crackers. She did talk about how playing multiple personalities at once is very challenging. She was a delight. Beverly’s panel was lovely. She refused to sit down. She would walk up and down the stage talking to the fans. If the question was asked on the left side, she was standing on the left side, talking straight to the asker, and the same for the right side. And when Leslie (a lovely lady I met during autograph session later), said it was her birthday, she asked everyone to sing happy birthday to Leslie and then hugged her. Aww. Emilie’s panel was sweet. Lee introduced her as the sweetest girl in the world. She is so tiny that Lee had to help her onto the stool. (Aww!!). And she was just very sweet on stage. Adam Horowitz snuck in during her panel so I got a little distracted. He came by the back and I said hi, he returned the hi and continued to walk around the back. Then I had to pee, so I grabbed my bag, got a stand in for me, and went to go outside. I passed him on the way out and said Hi, I love Once and I loved Lost. He smiled and said thank you. I then went out to pee, but the line was like 15 people long. So then I went to chat with Meagan and then realized Adam came out so I went to see about a photo with him. I found him by the bathrooms and asked him very politely, which he said yes. He smiled for the camera and I got the photo of us. Then I used the bathroom. My cousin got a photo with him when I came out and I was showing him my photo when we realized there was a long line forming in front of Adam. Yikes. After that I had lunch where they treated us to fried chicken and slaw from Church’s.. hands down, better than KFC. Then was Lana and Bex’s panels in which I had to pay more attention to the fans as they were bending the rules.. OOPs. Or as Bex would say “Sorry..” Later I had Beverly’s photo op. When I got to the front after watching fellow volunteers sing songs in line (hilarious Gentry!!) I walked up and said Hi, I’m Sarah! She said Hello. I said nice to meet you. And she hugged me and of course, its granny so I had to give her a big hug back. But when we were standing there after the photo, I said I’m a big fan, I love Granny. And she took my hand in hers and squeezed it. And then she said “Sarah, Granny loves you too,” (I am still fan girling about this writing this on Friday. wow). I did autograph line for Beverly Sunday night. Sadly, we had fans standing in between us, so she never came to me afterwards. I did the names on posties for the photos and did line control. I did like chatting with the fans, and i was 6 feet away from Beverly most of that time. So, I can’t complain.

The best moments were Karaoke, meeting the cast, meeting the fans, getting to bump into Amber, Erin from #OnceSpoof and Barbara again and finally meeting Giennie and Killihan in person! (Sorry you guys had to do a search party for me…) and getting to spend the weekend with Meagan after being friends online since season 3. I made a lot of new friends. Got to finally meet Ace from #OnceSpoof (god, I love this guy!) and Aimee as well. The friends I made last year, getting to see them again this time was the sprinkles of the awesome cake. Would I do it again? Depends.. would Josh and Colin both be there? Would the rude people not? Hmm, we’ll see.. But I’m thankful for this weekend. I got fantastic autographs and lovely photos. And that karaoke night was one of the best nights I have had in a long time. This cast is fantastic, the fans are fantastic.. #blessed.

Catching Up – A New Lens

I know February is a short month, but it’s hard to believe I’ve let it slip away and that we’re now in the first full week of March without any kind of update. I could blame it on being too busy, or that I’ve had a cold, or a dozen other excuses, but mostly it’s just not getting around to it. Regardless, here’s an update, mostly focusing on the acquisition of a new camera lens and the outings to give it a test run.

Just a shade over a year ago, fellow photographer Bennie Brawley and I were invited to photograph the Mount Zion Institute in Winnsboro, SC. Bennie got some amazing shots, so I had to know what lens he was using. That was my first introduction to the Tokina 11-16mm f/2.8 lens. Bennie also uses this lens to capture some incredible Milky Way shots. Since that trip I’ve encountered other photographers with this same lens, and all gave it rave revues.

I’ve been wanting a super wide angle lens and this one seemed to hit that sweet spot of price vs performance. I added it to the list of items I wanted to get before we moved out west next year, and slowly started saving up for it. With paychecks from several singing gigs coming in, I figured the time was right to make the purchase. A couple of weeks ago the lens arrived, so I took it out to put it through its paces.

Downtown Greenville

My first outing was local. I know, I know…I’ve shot Falls Park and Downtown a thousand times before, but that’s why this locale worked for a lens test. It was a known quantity. Plus, I have another talk to give at the end of March and needed some specific downtown shots.

I found parking on a side street and first headed to the Court Street area. Right away I was blown away by how wide the image actually was. As with any super-wide, there’s a lot of distortion and skewing. You can do some correction, but it just looks…wrong. For example, here’s a shot of the old courthouse and Poinsett Hotel. The image bows in at the top. This is is the photo at the top of this post, BTW:

Here it is with some “auto” correction for skewing in Lightroom. To me, this makes the buildings look even more distorted.

I wandered down to the Peace Center where I was able to get a shot that captured the sign and both auditoriums in one image. Clouds were a bit of a problem.

I made my way on down to Falls Place and the Liberty Bridge, taking shots from familiar locations. I found myself starting at 16mm and widening the frame as desired, rather than starting at the widest point and moving toward telephoto, as I do with my other lenses.

The lens didn’t work for everything. In this shot of the Liberty Bridge from the park the bridge gets lost. The image is too wide. It would have been better if I’d been closer.

I continued up to Falls Place and got some good shots of the Peace Center and Wyche Pavilion reflecting in the Reedy River.

I walked back up Main Street taking random shots of buildings along the way. Over all, I was please with the way the images turned out.

I had to get some tickets over to Ken in Clemson, and that gave me another excuse to take out the lens.

Central and Pendleton

Ken and I started out by lingering over coffee in Clemson, as we usually do. From there we headed into the town of Central, stopping first at the old roller mill. The first thing that I noticed was that I could get an entire shot of the mill without the power lines in the way. Here’s a shot from my Panasonic Lumix, which had been my go-to for wide angle shots…

…and here’s the shot from the Tokina lens, where I was able to move forward beyond the wires.

On the other side of the main street we stopped at the old Central School, now converted to apartments, and Mount Zion Methodist next door.

After zig-zagging through the countryside and rejecting a few targets we wound up in Pendleton, stopping first at St. Paul’s Episcopal. Once again I was able to avoid some wires (seen in the first shot below, taken with the Lumix) by using the new lens. However, some of the distortion just couldn’t be avoided.

We wandered through the cemetery, visiting the grave of Thomas Clemson. I took shots of stone textures with both cameras to use as overlays for future photos. I also took a few shots of the blooming camellias to see how the new lens would work in close quarters.

From St. Paul we drove to the south side of Pendleton to the ruins of Tanglewood Mansion.

We had lunch, then stopped at the old Welcome Baptist Church on Highway 76 in Sandy Springs.

I left Ken and drove back home, but I wasn’t done for the day. After a brief respite I was off to catch a sunset.

Caesar’s Head

I drove straight on up to Caesar’s Head to try out the new lens with some sunset shots. In addition to my usual complement of cameras I had my old Nikon D50 with the Sigma 18-250 lens. I snapped a variety of shots.

Table Rock tended to get lost. It looked more like a generic mountain sunset with a wide view, which was OK. I had also been warned that these ultra wide lenses tended to have lots of sun flare. That was definitely the case. Opening the aperture a bit took care of some of the problem, but some of my best shots were ruined with flares.

So far I really like this lens. As with any lens you have to be aware of its strengths and weaknesses. This one is really sharp, but does cause some distortion. Even so, I’m glad I’ve got it, and I’m looking forward to using it with some astronomy shots.

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