#i thought about how two years ago this time i was seventeen | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

honeyhotteoks · 5 months

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always only you (c.sc)

summary: the date was terrible, awful even, but you just can't call your brother to pick you up. you have to call his best friend instead.

note: hi um....... i'm back and a seventeen stan now????? don't worry, i'm still working on ateez fic, but s.coups has taken hold of my brain and i needed to get this one out there so..... pls enjoy

warnings: non idol!seungcheol, fem!reader, older brother mingyu, seungcheol is mingyus bff, reader is called a sl*t in a mean way by her shitty date, v protective cheol, reckless driving, unprotected sex (wrap it up dont be like them), reader is curvy and descriptors like full, thick, etc. are used throughout, makeouts, grinding, cheol is obsessed with pussy, i mean fr he's a bonafide wap enjoyer, an oral aficionado of the wettest kind, anyways there's oral sex f receiving, hand stuff, rough fingering, rough but passionate sex, use of baby and princess, creampies b/c lbr he's gotta, anyways they're obsessed with each other

pairings: s.coups x reader

genre: smut and more smut, childhood friends to lovers

word count: 14.2K

It was a bad date.

Not the worst date you’ve ever had, granted, but still pretty up there in terms of terrible. He left an hour ago, the minute you interrupted his monologue to tell him that you were pretty sure things weren’t going to work out. You’ve never had someone leave in the middle of a date before, but then again, you’ve never actually told someone the date was bad in the middle either.

Not being able to find the right guy is starting to feel embarrassing. It’s been years since your last relationship and months since you even had a second date. Naively, you had had such a good feeling about tonight and having to be proven wrong at breakneck speed before you even got your entrees feels like some kind of poetic karma for something you must have done. You just wish for once you had kept your mouth shut, but your good feeling had been infectious and your excitement about the date bubbled up out of you to your friends and your coworkers.

You just wish you never told Mingyu.

I have a really good feeling about him. That’s what you told your brother on the phone a few hours ago. We’ve been talking for a few weeks, I think you’ll really like him.

Stupid.

You should have known he was on the rebound from the suspiciously large gap in photos on his Instagram. You should have known he was just trying to sleep with you from the minute he commented on your dress, from the way he touched your shoulder for too long for the first hug. You should have known on top of all of that that he would be boring from his joking non-answer when you asked about his most recent read. Sometimes it takes all of those things wrapped up tightly together and shoved directly in your face from across a dining room table to know for sure.

You just wish you never said a word to Mingyu. You don’t want to see that look in his eyes when you tell him he wasn’t the right guy. His eyes always go soft, mouth downturned, and it kills you every time because he means it when he says - You’ll find the right guy soon, anyone would be crazy to not love you.

Tonight you really don’t want pity, you don’t think you can handle it.

“Are you ready for the check?” The server’s voice snaps you right out of your thoughts and you look up at his sympathetic smile.

“Sorry,” You manage, “yes,”

“No rush,” He lies, immediately producing the leather billfold and sliding it across the tablecloth.

The floor doesn’t start to drop out from beneath you until you open it, despite having to sit here and eat your pasta alone. This place is expensive, more expensive than you thought.

Your eyes run through the bill. Four cocktails, two appetizers, two entrees, one slice of cherry cheesecake. The bills your date left on the table just barely covers three cocktails. You can’t afford this. The prices here were probably nothing for your date given how much he talked about his extremely smart investing strategies, but not for you.

You do fast math, panic math.

After paying the bill you’ll have 9,600 won in your debit account. You get paid tomorrow so it’s not the scariest number you’ve ever seen in your account, but it’s definitely not enough for a taxi home.

Your stomach churns.

You pay the bill quickly, quietly, the server’s hovering presence by your shoulder enough to tell you there is in fact a considerable rush. Your card is returned to you in moments, and he places a brown paper bag in front of you, “There’s an extra slice of cheesecake in there for you,” he says, “I’m sorry about your date.”

He’s gone before you can say thank you.

You suppose you can’t really sit inside anymore if you’ve paid the bill and you’re holding a to-go bag, so you step out into the chilly night air. It’s been raining lately, but barely. It’s been cloudy more than anything, and yet here you are walking outside into the cold night air and a late autumn storm of icy rain.

Your date was a special kind of bastard for leaving you stranded a half hour from your apartment in a storm like this.

The comments he made about you, about your dress and the way it fits flick through your mind and your jaw draws tightly shut. If you had had the wherewithal in that moment to slap him or toss a glass of water in his face you would have, but instead you sat frozen with your stomach in knots.

It takes you one flash of rage to scroll through your phone and delete the three dating apps installed, and then you open up your contacts and scroll for your brother’s name. He doesn’t live too far from here, and you know he’s probably out with some of his friends, but if you’re lucky maybe he’s close by. Your finger hovers over Mingyu’s contact, but you can't quite make the call.

You’re twenty-six, you should be grown up enough to get home by yourself after a bad date and not have to call him to rescue you. Embarrassment floods you, the idea of admitting you can’t afford the taxi tonight just sinks into your bones. You love your brother so much, but the idea of seeing him look at you the way he sometimes does and then slip money into your purse for you to find at home makes you want to cry. You’d call him and you’d tell him you’re returning it and he’d play dumb - What money, y/n? I didn’t put that there, maybe it’s like when you find 50,000 won in your old jeans?

No, you can’t call him. You can’t go over to his lovely little apartment with his absolutely lovely fiance and cry about the sorry state of your romantic life. Nothing about that will make you feel better in this moment, absolutely nothing.

You scroll away from his contact and you think about anyone else you could call, but there’s only one person who keeps coming to mind. There’s no way he’ll pick up, not when he sees your number on his phone, not after the way you’ve treated him for the past year, but his apartment really isn’t that far from here and if he doesn’t hate your guts you know he’ll at least give you a ride.

The rain picks up, pelting you hard enough that you have to duck back under the measly lip of the restaurants roof for what cover it provides, and you don’t realize you’re well and truly crying until your cheeks feel warm and wet and you can’t get a full breath, but here you are. Stranded alone, broke, and loveless in an apparently ill fitting dress, and there’s only one person’s voice you want to hear even if it’s just his stupid voicemail box.

Tears hiccup out of you as you dial, cold fingers shaking as you try to press the numbers you’ve had memorized by heart since you were thirteen and got your first cell phone.

The phone rings twice before he answers, “Hey, you,”

The easy sound of his voice makes your tears come faster. Your breath hitches in your chest, “Cheol?”

“y/n?” His voice shifts, “Are you crying?”

“I’m,” You hiccup again, “I’m sorry,”

“Hey,” He tries again, “y/n, is that you?”

“I messed up,” Your head is starting to throb and you press your eyes closed, leaning back against the cold wall of the restaurant and hiding as much of your body under the overhang of the roof as possible, “I’m sorry to call,”

“That’s okay,” Seungcheol says, his voice sounding strained, “what happened, princess?”

He hasn’t called you that in years, not since you were fifteen and carrying a torch for him. Not since you made Mingyu tell him to stop.

“C-can you come get me?” You wish you could just stop crying.

“Tell me where you are,” He answers immediately, and despite the rain you hear the sound of his car keys.

You give him the name of the restaurant, the closest cross streets, all blubbered out between fat tears and rain drops.

“That’s…” He sounds distant suddenly and then his voice reconnects, “twenty minutes, okay? I’ll be there in twenty minutes, princess, just take a deep breath,”

You drag in a shaky breath, “Cheol,” you scrub the tears from under your eyes, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know who else to call,”

“Me,” He says, his car starting up in the background, “you always call me if you need me,”

You haven’t seen him in almost a year, barely talked to him outside of sending reactions to each other's Instagram stories, but he’s coming.

The way you fell away from him was gradual at first, and then an intentional self preservationist wall. Mingyu had introduced his best friend to a girl, and despite your high school crush being supposedly dead and buried, you weren’t prepared for what Choi Seungcheol in love would look like. You started being busier and busier until his calls went unanswered and then eventually his calls just stopped altogether. Mingyu told you later that the relationship didn’t last, but the damage was done and in the end it was just easier not to reach out first.

You can’t believe he picked up the phone and you can’t believe the first thing he heard from you in a year was hysterical crying. Taking a set of deep, steadying breaths you wipe away the wetness from your cheeks. Your date had hurt your feelings, but you only let it last for a minute. You wouldn’t let a man with such a fragile ego get into your head, and besides, you’ve always liked this dress.

Seungcheol makes it to you in fifteen minutes flat. He’s broken at least six traffic laws to get to you, including running a solidly red, redlight, but he really doesn’t care.

He’s seen you cry before, plenty of times. When you skinned your knee at seven or that time he and Mingyu played a prank when you were eleven, tricking you into thinking you were home alone on Halloween night. He’s seen you cry at movies and at videos of puppies and the sound of moving music, and he remembers your eyes full of glassy tears watching Mingyu graduate college. He remembers the sound of it when your grandmother died when you were nineteen, the way your shoulders shook and your breath wheezed as you hid your face tightly in your brother's chest while he looked on feeling so, so helpless.

Seungcheol remembers all of it, but he’s never heard you sound like you did tonight.

Mingyu had said you had a date. Earlier in Seungcheol’s night at a bar not far from his apartment, his best friend mentioned it off hand. Mingyu said it like an afterthought as he answered one of your texts. Seungcheol tried not to notice the way his hand tightened on his beer can, enough to make the aluminum crack inwards on itself where his thumb dug into the cool metal. He tried not to think too much about what that meant, just like he’s been trying not to think too much about you at all lately.

Now his mind is racing, threading the pieces together as the wet road whips by. The threadiness of your voice turns synonymous with panic in his mind and now all he can think about is how he’ll find you when he gets there. He goes over the facts he knows while he stops behind a small block of traffic, his knuckles white as he grips the wheel.

A date, a bad date, a date you needed a ride away from. The kind of date you couldn’t tell your brother about, when he knows that Mingyu is always your first call. As the traffic disperses he presses the gas pedal and weaves around the slower cars, images flickering in his mind’s eye. A faceless man looking at you, making you uncomfortable, pressing into your space. His mind loops on the image of an unwanted kiss, of pushy hands finding their way under your blouse.

By the time he’s skidding into the parking lot of the restaurant his hands are shaking and he’s ready to kill.

When he sees you, wet and shivering on the sidewalk, he nearly falls out of the car trying to get to you. He leaves the key in the ignition, the door flung wide open with warmth pouring out into the chilly night air.

He looks flustered, rumpled like he was having a quiet night in. Heavy gray sweatpants that hang just right on his hips and an oversized white shirt. He’s wearing socks and slides and the second you see him it dawns on you that when you called him you must have sounded hysterical because he didn’t even try to dress for the icy weather.

“You look terrible,” You clap a hand over your lips to stop yourself from laughing, and you can’t believe that’s the first thing you manage to say to him after a year. You hate yourself for having no filter, no off switch, no ability to just be normal and say thank you for coming all this way.

His expression runs from panic to confusion in a split second, “What?”

“Fuck,” You laugh, shaking your head, “no, sorry, you look good, but it’s raining like hell, get in the car,”

He blinks, “y/n,”

“Come on,” You duck out from beneath the measly roof overhang and dart towards the passenger side door, “it’s freezing, I’ll explain in the car,”

Your dress is wet, but not soaked through, so you hope you won’t do any damage to his seats as you slide into the warmth of his car and shut the door. It takes him at least thirty seconds to follow you, but through his confusion at your reaction you bet he finally registers the cold wetness of his socks and it snaps him back to reality.

He leaves the car in park and turns his body to you.

You owe him an explanation, especially given the way you cried on the phone to him twenty minutes ago, but all you can think right now is that it’s really, really nice to see his face again. His hair has gotten longer, shaggier and curled a little at the neck and it might just be the fit of his shirt, but he looks broader. It’s only been a year, but he looks so much more like a man now. All you can manage is, “Hey, Cheol,”

“Hey,” He answers, shifting himself further in the seat so that he’s almost twisted up sideways, one leg tucked up to accommodate the position.

The front of his shirt is damp with rain and clinging a bit to his chest and you look down. You really do not need to be having these kinds of thoughts about him again, it’s only been a minute, ninety seconds at the most.

“y/n,” He says, his voice slow and soft, “what happened?”

Shame floods you, heating your cheeks red.

He stretches a hand across the center console, but he stops halfway, his fingers closing into a loose fist, “You know you can tell me anything, right?”

“I know,”

“I won’t tell Gyu,” He offers quietly, “just tell me what happened, and I promise, I’ll take care of it.”

Oh.

Your head snaps up at his serious tone, “Nothing happened, I’m fine,”

He looks more confused than before if that’s even possible, and you can practically see him working out his next words.

“Cheol,” You shake your head, “I’m serious, I’m completely fine, I just needed a ride,”

“You were crying,” He says, not a question but a fact.

“I know,” You sigh.

“You were crying like something happened,” He draws his arm back and runs a hand through his damp hair, “and you called me?”

“I know,” You repeat, “it was a bad date, but that’s all it was. He ditched me without a ride though and I just,”

Seungcheol’s lips close at your words as he waits for you to finish.

“The thought of calling Mingyu and telling him about this just,” You clear your throat to push back a little bubble of emotion, “yeah, I couldn’t do that,”

“Oh,” His voice drops, and Seungcheol shifts in his seat, throwing the car into drive, “got it.”

“No, Cheol,” You shake your head, “that’s not what I meant,”

“It’s fine,” He peels out of the parking lot, “I’ll drive you home.”

He’s angry, pissed at you in that way he gets pissed. Tightened jaw, heavy sighs, his knee bouncing in irritation. If you give it five minutes he’ll tell you what’s bothering him, he’ll say it in a fast rush like he’s more disappointed than mad. You have to let him come to you when he’s like this, no amount of trying to explain will fix it, so you wait.

The drive is silent, and you fight the urge to jump in with directions when he approaches each light and turn. He knows where your apartment is, he helped you move in four years ago when you graduated college. Mingyu and his friends lifting box after box and telling you to just relax and let the professionals handle it. You smile at the memory.

He stays quiet until he turns off the major road and down the side streets that will take you to your apartment, but finally he says, “You can’t just call me like that and expect me to drop everything when you have a bad date,”

“Were you busy?” You didn’t think so judging by the state of his clothes, but it’s not out of the realm of possibility. He could have had friends over, maybe a girl. You wonder idly if he’s seeing someone.

“That’s not the point,” He glances at you, “and you know it.”

“I’m sorry,” You tell him, and you mean it, “I really didn’t know who to call, and I just,”

“What, y/n?” He pushes a little.

“I just don’t want to tell Mingyu about the date,” You confess, “and I didn’t mean to call you and be such a mess, the date really was bad and I was feeling sorry for myself, and I didn’t have enough money to get home,”

“What?” He swivels his head to the side for a moment and then refocuses on the road.

“I would have called a taxi,” You explain, “but my fucking date left and didn’t pay after we ordered all this food and it was more than I was planning for,”

“He didn’t pay?” He sounds disgusted and you smile.

“No,” You tell him, “but in fairness, I did tell him in the middle of the date it wasn’t going to work out,”

He laughs sharply, and you know he’s still irritated but at least he’s listening, “That bad?”

“Yeah,” You sigh, “but it is what it is,”

He glances over to you again, “So he walked out?”

“Basically,” You nod, “he said what he needed to say, dropped twenty-thousand won on the table like that was going to cover anything and walked out. At least now I know he was an asshole, I’m not missing out on anything,”

“What did he say to you?” His voice pops up an octave.

You’d really rather not tell him, you’d be fine burying the comment he made deep down inside never to be unpacked again. You shake your head, “It’s fine,”

“It doesn’t seem fine,” He starts, but you smoothly cut back in.

“I just didn’t want Gyu to feel bad for me I guess, he knew I was looking forward to the date, and having to call for a ride like this, I don’t know. I was embarrassed,” You explain.

“I still don’t understand why you called me, though,” He admits, and you can still feel the tension in him even though the conversation has been ebbing and flowing, “I’m not your brother.”

Irritation sparks in you at the comment, “I know you’re not,” you turn to him, “but we’re friends, aren’t we?”

“Friends call each other,” He says simply, “don’t they?”

You let his comment sit in the air between you for a moment, and then you sigh, “Yeah, they do. I’m sorry I disappeared on you like that,”

“I tried calling,” He says softly, “but you were always busy,”

“I know,” You breathe.

He drives further, slower now and safer that you’re in the car, and you can see him thinking through your words. Finally he slides his hand across the center console with his palm turned up, offering you his hand, “y/n,” he says, “are you doing okay? With money, I mean, after what you said?”

“I’m good,” You tell him, “it was just shitty timing,”

“If you need anything,” He squeezes your hand as you slide your palm across his, “I’m here, we don’t have to say anything to,”

“I’m okay,” You assure him, “but thank you, seriously,”

He nods, accepting your words, but then he asks something harder, “What did that guy say to you, y/n? I know you, you weren’t crying like that over not being able to get a taxi,”

You sigh, leaning back in the passenger seat, “Can I ask you to let it go?”

“You can ask,” He shrugs, “but so can I.”

You sit quietly, looking at your entwined hands resting on your knee. His thumb strokes over your knuckles slowly.

“Fine,” You murmur, “he said he didn’t want to date me anyways, he just came to sleep with me,”

His hand tightens on yours.

“And if I wasn’t going to fuck him,” You do your best to clean up some of the language he used when he got up from the table, “I shouldn’t have dressed like a slut,”

You leave out the part that really cut deep, the part that made the more form fitting dress you chose go from sexy to something sour.

“Give me this asshole’s name,” Seungcheol skids to a stop a little too harshly at the next traffic light and turns to you.

“No,” You shake your head, “I’m fine now, it just stung,”

His lips close in a tight line and then he sighs, “I’m so sorry someone said that to you,”

“Don’t apologize, Cheol,” You squeeze his hand, “you didn’t say it.”

“I know, but still,” He holds your gaze, “it was mean, and you deserve much better from a guy you’re seeing, and you don’t look like, or I mean, you aren’t a,”

You smile as he stumbles over his words and someone behind him gently honks the horn enough to let him know the light has gone green.

He jolts and refocuses on the road, clearing his throat, “What I’m trying to say is that you look nice, pretty. The dress is good, and you, um, you don’t look,”

“Thank you,” You cut him off, trying to save him from swallowing his own tongue out of embarrassment, and you ignore the way your stomach flipped over on itself hearing Seungcheol call you pretty.

“Yeah,” He swallows, slowing down to make the final turn onto your little block, “you know what I mean,”

“Mhm,” You laugh, breaking down any lingering tension, “Cheol, are you a little disappointed you didn’t get to punch my date? Is that it?”

“Shut up,” He sighs.

“Aw,” You smile as he pulls into a space by your apartment, “You were worried about me?”

He rolls his eyes as he kills the ignition, “You were hysterical,” he says, “what was I supposed to think?”

“Don’t worry,” You smile as he throws open the driver’s side door, “I think it’s kind of sweet that you went all knight and shining armor on me,”

His lip twitches, “Don’t make fun,” he says, “I thought something bad happened to you,”

“Nothing bad happened to me,” You find yourself assuring him again even though he already knows this, and you twist the moment back to a joke as quickly as you can, “unless you count listening to a guy talk about his ex for twenty minutes,”

He grimaces, “Ugh,”

“Exactly,”

“Actually, you know what,” He grins, “you’re right, that is a terrible date and you were right to call me,”

He’s out of the car and crossing to your door and relief floods your chest. Just like that, you’re back to normal.

Seungcheol pulls open your door to let you out and says, “Do you have a towel or something?”

“You want to come up?”

“If you don’t mind,”

“You just swooped in and saved my night, Coups, of course I don’t mind.” He smiles at the nickname, the one mostly used by his friend group and coined by Seungcheol himself during their short lived Soundcloud music career freshman year of college. The nickname stuck, but you and Mingyu knew him before and you’ve both always, always called him Seungcheol.

He ducks his head, smiles, and follows you up the stairs and into your apartment just like old times.

It’s a little strange seeing him like this after so much time has passed, but no matter what has happened in your life, even when your childhood little crush on him was making your nights sleepless, he’s always been there. He’s been a constant in your life since you could form memories, and when you really think about it, you’ve never not known Seungcheol. Suddenly seeing him in your living room feels right, and it makes you wonder why you couldn’t pick up the phone and say something real to him this past year.

“It looks good in here,” He offers, toeing off his slides in the entryway and stepping into your little living room, “it looks like you,”

“Thanks,” You’re pretty sure the floor of your bedroom is still covered in clothes from earlier, but he’s not going to see that and you’re just glad you didn’t let that chaos spillover out here.

“So,” He clears his throat lightly.

“Towel,” You jump, “right, hold on,”

You disappear down the hall and Seungcheol’s chest goes fluttering fast. He doesn’t need a towel, he doesn’t need anything except a pair of dry socks and his own bed, and he can’t figure out for the life of him why he gave into the little voice that told him to come upstairs. You’ve made it pretty clear over the past year or so that you’ve grown up, you’ve made your own group of friends outside of him and your brother and the guys. He doesn’t need to be here, you don’t need him anymore, you just needed a ride.

But he’s missed you a little. A lot if he’s being honest with himself. Sometimes he finds himself asking Mingyu about you, hoping you might drop by while he’s at his best friend’s place. Your name on his phone screen earlier in the night had stopped his heart cold. He couldn’t imagine why you were calling and not just texting, and he picked up the phone so fast he thought he might have fucked it up and accidentally pressed end. He tried to sound casual, normal, but his heart was pounding.

Standing in your living room he feels out of place, like a forgotten childhood relic unboxed in the middle of a new home. He doesn’t know which seat to sit in, he doesn’t have his spot on your couch here like he did at your old place. He doesn’t know where you keep your glasses or which remote would switch on the television. He doesn’t know which book you’ve been reading from the little stack on the table or the name of the place you’ve been working, and there’s a man’s jacket hanging on the wall in the hallway that he doesn’t recognize. He hopes it’s Mingyu’s.

He doesn’t know why he’s here. He should leave. He should go.

“Okay,” Your voice comes back, and he tears his eyes away from the little details of your life he doesn’t recognize to look back at you, “I’ve got a towel, socks, and I bet I have a sweatshirt of Gyu’s around here if you’re cold,”

“I’m good,” He recovers, taking the dry items from your hands.

Your fingers brush along his as you pass everything off and your stomach jumps.

“Come in,” You wave him in, “I’ll make some coffee or something and then I need to change,”

“You should get a warm shower,” He says abruptly, “you’ll catch a cold,”

“I’m fine,” You shake your head, “I wasn’t out there for too long,”

“I’ll make the coffee then, you need to get out of that wet dress,” He shoos you away and points to your kitchen, “I assume you have a normal coffee machine and not some fancy Italian thing?”

“I think you’ll be fine,” You smile, “I’ll just be a second,”

He nods, and you dart back down the hallway to your bedroom.

It takes you three minutes to change into something comfortable and clean and then kick all of your scattered clothes into the closet and shut the door. You run a brush through your tangled hair from the rain, and you almost forget that your childhood crush is walking freely around your apartment, but then you hear his laugh and you melt into the wall behind you. You missed the sound of it so much, and if you don’t get a handle on this right now you’re going to go out there and make a fool of yourself.

But then he laughs again.

You smile as you come back out into the living room, leaving your good sense behind in the bathroom, “What’s so funny?”

“I haven’t seen these in years,” He grins, and as you come around the corner you realize he’s looking at the photos you have framed and sitting in various spots on your bookshelf.

“Oh,” You smile, seeing the one he’s holding and studying, “yeah,”

“This one,” He tips the frame so you can see the picture, but you already know which one, Mingyu and Seungcheol in their first year of college stand in the center of the frame, Wonwoo, Jeonghan, Dokyeom, and Hoshi with their arms thrown around each other on either side. You are crouching in the center with Jeonghan’s little sister, both of you holding out a peace sign.

“Isn’t this the night we went to that haunted theme park?” Seungcheol asks with a smile.

“Yeah,” You take the photo back from him and look it over for a moment, “in Daegu,”

He nods, “I remember,”

“Yeah,” You place the photo back in it’s assigned spot and turn towards the kitchen, “I just remember you and DK scaring the living shit out of me,”

“God,” He runs a hand through his hair, “we did, I felt so bad about that after,”

“Mm,” You laugh.

“Gyu reamed us out for it later,” He follows you into the kitchen and watches as you pour two cups of freshly brewed coffee.

“He never told me that,” Your eyes perk up in surprise.

“He said,” Seungcheol straightens himself up to his full height and lets his face go passive for his impression, “‘If you ever make my sister cry like that again, you’ll be sorry,’”

“Sorry?” You laugh, “Mingyu wouldn’t know how to make someone sorry if his life depended on it,”

“I don’t know,” He shrugs, relaxing his shoulders and reaching for his cup, “it seemed pretty clear he wasn’t fucking around, we took him seriously,”

“Wow,” You lean against the counter, “that’s actually kind of sweet,”

“He’s always been protective of you,” Seungcheol points out, “even now, he’ll talk about you and I can see it,”

“I’m not a kid anymore, though,” You bristle a little.

“He knows that,” Seungcheol shakes his head, “he just worries, you know, it’s his nature,”

“Yeah,” You nod, taking a long sip of your coffee, “I know,”

Seungcheol hovers, not finding a place to lean or to sit in the unfamiliar place, and finally he just asks the question that’s been on his mind for the past twenty minutes, “Is that why you didn’t call him? He worries too much?”

“I guess a little,” You move past him and back into the living room, “come sit down, you’re making me nervous,”

He blushes and every little emotion you’ve ever had for him comes thundering back in your chest. There are at least three places for him to sit that aren’t directly next to you on the couch, but he ignores every one of them and sits next to you, barely a foot away, and turns towards you so he can put all his focus on you.

“So,” He prompts you, “come on, it’s just me,”

Talking to him was always easy, always. Even in the throes of your infatuation you were able to hold a conversation with him, sometimes a long one out on the balcony of your parent’s house. It’s almost irritating how quickly that familiarity and comfort comes back.

“I just feel like I’ve been really fucking this whole dating thing up,” You confess, “and Mingyu’s been… well you know him, he’s like the number one hype man for me making all my dreams come true, and being ten out of ten happy,”

“Yeah,” He nods, but lets you continue.

“But I just haven’t been able to make it work with anyone in a while,” You bite down the reason why in the back of your brain, “and every time I tell him about a bad date he just looks sadder and sadder for me,”

“Mm,” He nods, sympathetic, “I know exactly what you mean.”

“I’m so glad you picked up, honestly,” You glance down at the edge of your cup, “you’ve never treated me like that, and I just… I guess I needed a friend and not my brother tonight,”

He hesitates, but then his hand comes to rest on your knee and he gives you a squeeze, “I get it,” he says, “but, honestly it seems like you’re putting a lot of pressure on yourself,”

“I know, but,” You sigh, your words dying out as you focus on his lingering hand on your knee.

“What’s so important about getting a guy right now?” He asks, and you almost laugh at the absurdity of this man asking you that question.

“Cheol,” You shift on the couch to reposition, pulling back your knee from his touch so you can face him and admit this without being dizzier than you are about his presence, “I don’t know, exactly, but… don’t you feel like living alone is kind of fucking lonely sometimes?”

His eyes flick over you and then he nods.

The words keep coming as much as you don’t want them to now that you’ve started telling someone, telling him the truth of it and you grimace as you admit it, “The sick part is that I think it’s me. Tonight was the exception, he was a dick, but most of these guys are nice. They’re nice, they’re respectful, they seem to be interested in me, but none of them are what I want, none of them are,”

You have to stop. You have to get off this topic and off this train before you say something really and truly stupid and burn this newly restored friendship down to ash.

“Having high standards isn’t a bad thing,” He offers, “and Gyu sets the bar high for how you should treat a woman, I mean,”

“You think I’m talking about Mingyu?” You laugh sharply.

“He’s the best guy I know,” He starts to say and then the wheels start turning.

It happens fast, your absolute lightning quick strike to the match, but your poor decision making usually goes something like this. It makes you mad at first, his constant reference to your perfect brother, but then it all makes sense. Seungcheol really has no idea how you feel about him, as a person or otherwise. It doesn’t enter his brain that the guy who set your standards for men so high might be him, even after he drove illegally fast on wet roads just to come get you because he heard you cry. Up until the last year of your life where you tried to install some distance, he was always there. He was always your first call, always your last call too, and you could never really see anyone else while he was towering right in front of you. He’s never let you down and he doesn’t even know it.

“I can’t believe you,” The words slip out, and then you’re kissing him.

He takes a sharp inhale of breath at the way you collapse onto him, holding yourself up with one hand on his chest and the other on his neck, and his mouth is so warm. You press the first kiss tentatively, and then the second a little more insistently, and then you realize he hasn’t moved an inch and isn’t kissing you back in the least.

You fly backwards, your hand over your mouth, “Oh, god, I’m so sorry,”

He clears his throat and shifts, shaking his head, “It’s fine, don’t worry about it,”

“I can’t believe I just did that,” You blush scarlet, “I’m a mess, I’m so, so sorry, Cheol,”

“Really,” He avoids your eyes, “it’s fine, it was an emotional night, and you just said it yourself, living alone is lonely. We’re good,”

“I didn’t kiss you because I was sad,” You run a hand through your hair and slump back on the couch, “I kissed you because you were being a dumb ass,”

“I feel like you’re insulting me a lot tonight considering I just drove across town for you,” He’s not angry, not really, but he doesn’t let you off so easily, he never has.

“I kissed you because you’re the best guy I know,” You counter his words back, “and I’m sick of you always putting yourself down when-”

He yanks you forwards by your wrist, and this kiss is what you’ll count forever as the first one. He drags your body forwards as he leans back against the couch and kisses you hard, his tongue dipping past your lips this time, his breath mingling with yours.

You shift for better purchase, your chest and his flush together, and you moan softly against his lips when his hand slips lower on your waist.

He breaks the kiss, his forehead leaning against yours, “What the fuck are we doing?”

“I think they call it making out,” You manage, your heart beating fast like a bird.

“Jesus,” He shakes his head, “what are we doing?”

“Cheol,” You start, but he kisses you again, hungrier and hotter as he pulls you in.

You pant against his mouth, your brain exploding into little fireworks as his hands start to wander, and then he groans, “You feel so good,”

This is going somewhere fast, and with your hands twisted in the fabric of his t-shirt you swing your leg over his hips and let him wrap his arms around you.

“We should slow down,” You find yourself mumbling against his mouth, “but I don’t want to, I want you,”

He nods against you, his hands squeezing your thighs where they rest on either side of him, “I want you too,”

“We should talk more,” You manage as his kisses travel over your jaw.

“Later?” He asks, his hands dragging you closer, “God, that dress,”

“Yeah?” You’re breathless already.

“If I knew you were going to kiss me I would have peeled it off you,” He pants.

A moan gets caught in your throat, your hips jerking, nipples hardening against his chest as you throw yourself into another kiss.

“God,” He shivers.

“Cheol stay,” You can talk later, he’s absolutely right, and you beg him not to go between kisses, “please stay,”

Logic starts to pump through him at the implications of that, so much more than kissing comes with staying for the night and he starts to shake his head, but at the way you’re touching him he can’t quite tear his hands away.

“I should go home,” He murmurs against your mouth, fingers slipping underneath the hem of your t-shirt, “you’ve been drinking,”

“I had two drinks,” You connect your lips with his again, tongue dipping into his mouth, “like three hours ago,”

“Still,” He kisses you again despite his words, his hand now flat against the small of your back.

“I’m not drunk,” You pull yourself closer using his shoulders, “if you don’t want to kiss me, don’t kiss me, but don’t use that as an excuse,”

“I should go home,” He repeats, like saying it out loud might make his body follow his brain, but it doesn’t. All he does is tug you closer, your legs now fully splayed around his hips as he leans back against the couch and groans against your mouth.

“I should,” He starts again, whispered thoughts against your lips, but you push back from his chest and break your mouths apart.

“If you want to go so bad, go,” You pull your arms away from him, crossing them under your chest to hold yourself steady. Your nails press pinpricks into your palms.

“This isn’t about what I want,” His eyes soften in that tender way you love, and his hand cups your waist, thumb brushing a line over the deep curve of your hip.

“Why wouldn’t this be about what you want?” You press him, “Or about what I want?”

“Mingyu is my best friend,” He says, his mouth drawn into a sullen line, “and I never want to do anything that betrays his trust or hurts him in any way,”

“I’m not asking you to,” Your voice is small.

“Just,” He sighs, his head tipping backwards against the cushions and his hands slipping to rest over your thighs, “tell me something, okay? Be honest,”

“Okay,”

“Do you want me because you’re lonely and I’m here,” He asks, his eyes locked to the ceiling, “or do you want me because you want me?”

Your arms fall slack and you open your mouth to respond but he presses forwards.

“Because if this is a one time thing to make us both feel better,” He shakes his head, “I can’t do that, I have to go home.”

“Cheol,” You murmur, but he doesn’t lift his head. You reach for him, brushing a hand along his cheek and drawing his gaze back down from the ceiling to your face, “Seungcheol, look at me,”

“Yeah,” He finally follows your gaze.

“I love my brother, but this isn’t about him,” You tell him clearly, and you watch his lips part so he can cut in but you shake your head, “it isn’t. This is about us, and I’ve had a crush on you since I was fucking thirteen,”

He blinks, a grin breaking across his face, “You have?”

“Yeah,” You shuffle closer on his lap, “why do you think I disappeared? You started dating that girl and I just… it wasn’t my place to say anything, it’s not like you were mine, but,”

He brushes the hair back from your cheek as he nods, “It hurts to see the person you want with someone else,”

“Yeah,”

“And you wanted me?”

You nod, stroking his neck where your hand rests, “I just needed some space after that, I thought I could move on,”

“I know the feeling,” He smiles, his thumb tender against your jaw, “believe me,”

“I do,” You nod, “so believe me when I tell you I’ve wanted you for a long time and I don’t just want the one night,”

He sits frozen, his eyes studying your expression, and then he’s moving. Seungcheol pulls you down to meet his mouth again, hands roughly threading into your hair and gripping your hip as he tugs your bodies flush together. He kisses like you hope he fucks, passionate and a little messy, like his need to be inside you and consumed by you is more important than any vanity.

“God,” He groans against your mouth, “he’s going to kill me,”

“Probably,” You huff a laugh against his lips, rolling your hips forwards to slot your bodies together tightly, and at the feeling of his hardening cock pressed against your sex you can’t help the breathy moan that slips out.

He drops his hands to your hips, coaxing you into rolling them again as he presses upwards and you follow his guidance with ease. He curses softly and you roll your hips again, “Oh, fuck my fucking life,” he groans, kissing his way down your throat, “he’ll kill me, but you’re worth it,”

“I better be,” You tease him, tugging gently on his hair as he licks a stripe along your throat.

“Oh, you are,” He shifts back up to kiss your lips again, his mouth pillowy soft and hot against yours, “and I love Gyu, but,”

“Seungcheol,” You push on his shoulders.

His rarely used full name gets his attention and he leans back just enough to see your face, “What’s wrong?”

“Can you please stop talking about my brother while you’re trying to fuck me?” You can hear the whine in your own voice, “I need you right now, we’ll deal with him later,”

“Sorry, sorry,” He smiles, “of course, come here,”

You melt into him as he gathers you closer, his warm, rough hands finding new expanses of skin to touch and it’s strange but delicious to know that there are still brand new things you can learn about a person even after knowing them all your life. He gets soft beneath you like butter when you touch his ears, audibly groans when you grind against him, and gets breathier every time you kiss his neck. He’s not afraid to make little noises in your ear, to curse when you do something right or softly beg you to do something again.

With his mouth on yours and his hands exploring you, you’re just a shaky wet mess in his arms and he doesn’t even fully realize it yet, still so focused on studying your body with his lips, his tongue.

“Ch-Cheol,” You whine as his teeth nip at your pulsepoint, “baby,”

His hands tighten, sliding to cup your backside through the thin fabric of your lounge pants, “Say that again,”

“Baby?”

He exhales hot air across your neck and chest, “God, I like that,”

“You hate pet names,” You sigh, remembering how his nose always crinkled in an uncomfortable scrunch when he heard people getting too coupley.

“No, I don’t,” His hand slides up, tucks under the waistband of your pants, and slides back down to feel your skin, “I hate cringey shit. You calling me ‘baby’ while you’re grinding on my dick isn’t cringey, it’s fucking hot,”

“Ah,” You tug his hair just a little, rolling your hips again, “yeah? Like this?”

His hips jolt up, pressing his cock against your clothed mound and he groans, “Say it,” he nips at your neck again and then pushes you backwards so that you’re sitting up straddling his lap, “and let me see you,”

For a brief flickering second you feel shy, another stark moment of awareness that the man between your thighs is Mingyu’s best friend, but it flashes away the minute you see his smile. He’s looking up at you like you invented the sun and you think it just might make you dizzy enough to say yes to anything he could ever ask of you.

“God,” His eyes rake over you, “you’re so fucking pretty,”

Blush creeps up your chest, “Yeah, baby?”

He swallows hard, his hands coasting up your arms and his eyes coming to rest on the heavy swell of your chest, “The prettiest.” His fingers tuck underneath the straps of your tank top and your bralette and he glances up to your face, “Can I see?”

“Please,” You whisper.

He moves slowly, peeling down the straps from each of your shoulders first, letting the thin fabric of your tank top droop down your arms until he’s left with just the stretchy elastic of your black bralette. His fingers trace your curves, the pad of his thumb ghosting over one of your hardening nipples until it pushes into a firm peak under the fabric.

“Cheol, please,” If he doesn’t touch you soon you’re going to be a squirming mess.

“Relax,” He toys with the strap, “we’ve got all night,”

You gasp as he dips forwards, peeling the front of your top down entirely until your breasts spill out of the elastic fabric. His lips connect with your skin, tongue exploring intimate parts of you in ways you’ve never experienced quite like this with anyone else.

“These,” He cups your full breasts in his hands, kissing along each swell, “are perfect, princess,”

You shiver at that, whining in his grip as he traces his tongue down and ghosts it close to your nipple, but you smile and manage, “I really took you for an ass man,”

“I’m an everything man where you’re concerned,” He flicks his tongue experimentally across the hardened bud and hums softly when you jolt in his arms, “so excuse me if I have to slow down and show my appreciation,”

This crush is going to kill you, that’s the thought that gets instantly banished from your brain the second Seungcheol wraps his lips around one nipple while his fingers pinch the other, setting a steady pace of sucking and teasing that is sure to leave pleasured little bruises.

“Oh,” You grip his shoulders, “oh, Jesus, Cheol,”

“Feel good, baby?” He switches sides smoothly and sucks again.

A jolt of pleasure rocks from your chest to your untouched clit and you rock down, trying desperately to press your aching center against anything for a little friction.

“Yeah?” He prompts you gently.

“So, so good,” You nod, rolling again, “but I need more, please,”

He nods against your chest, pressing one more kiss to your breastbone before he says, “y/n, I don’t want to move too fast or anything, we’ll do whatever you want, but,”

“But what?” You’re about a second from pushing his hand into your underwear yourself.

“Can I eat you out?”

Your stomach flips, “Oh, fuck yes,”

You’re on your back practically the second you give him permission. He holds you tight to his chest as he pushes himself up off the couch and flips you around, dropping you back onto the cushions and tugging at your clothes. Normally you’d be a little self conscious, especially in the brighter light of your living room and not the dim strategic lightning of your bedroom, but Seungcheol keeps looking at every inch of your body like he’s starving for it, groaning in pleasure at every inch of you that gets revealed, and you’re starting to think he really does like everything about you.

You help push off your pants with shaky hands, but let him loop his thumbs under the thin straps of your underwear and tug those free, a slick wet patch in the middle where you’ve been soaking through the cotton for the past half hour. You help him with your top, until finally you’re completely bare and he’s pushing you to lie back onto the extended length of the chaise while he falls to his knees before you.

“Wow,” He breathes, his hands running along your thighs, “just… wow,”

“Stop,” You can’t stop the blush now, and you fight the urge to reach for a blanket or cross your arms over yourself at his exacting gaze.

“Nope,” He dips his hands to your inner thighs and pushes your legs apart little by little, “I’m going to enjoy every bit of this,”

“Now you’re just trying to embarrass me,” You smile.

His tongue darts out to wet hips lips and he shakes his head, “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this,”

Your stomach churns, flipping nervously as he looks at you so earnestly.

“I’m serious,” He kisses your knee as he opens one of your legs wider, “I’ve thought about this a thousand times, but you’re so much better than my imagination,”

“Cheol,” You whisper tightly.

“Mm,” He sighs as he tips your hips back, maneuvering your legs wide and open now and shifting your hips to the very edge of the couch so he can tuck smoothly between your open legs, “I wonder if you taste as sweet as I imagined too,”

Your fingers grip down on the cushions, your heart hammering in your chest.

“Look at you,” He sighs pleasantly, his fingers ghosting along the edge of your lower lips, “is all this for me, baby?”

“Uh-huh,” Your breath hitches as his finger just barely touches your seam.

“You got this wet just from grinding on my lap?” He smiles, his teeth catching his thick bottom lip.

“Cheol,” It’s all you can manage, you really didn’t know he was like this.

His eyes soften up though at the sound of his name on your lips, and he kisses your thigh tenderly before looking back up to you, “Doing good? Okay?”

“Mhm,” You’re fine, you are, except you think you might come the second he touches you and you’re a little terrified at just how intense he is from minute one.

“y/n,” He squeezes you a little.

“I’m good,” You breathe, “I promise,”

“Okay,” He kisses your skin again and nods, “just relax, okay?”

“I’m relaxed,” You answer too quickly and one of his eyebrows goes high.

“Mhm,” He eases up on his knees a little to see your face better and smooths his hand from your leg to your hip to your stomach, “what’s going on?”

“This is just a little surreal,” You admit, “isn��t it?”

“Yeah,” He releases your legs and shifts up so he can lean over your body, catching your mouth again in a soft kiss, “it is, but do you trust me?”

“Of course,” You kiss him back.

“Then you should know,” He nuzzles your nose with his, “that all I want to do right now is make you come on my face until you can’t think, and after that if you still want to take this further we can, but baby, I really don’t care what we do tonight. I just want to be with you,”

Your mouth runs dry, and you can feel your core throbbing hard between your legs, your heart fluttering fast.

“So, please, can I make you come?” He smiles, pressing another quick kiss to your lips, “I think you want me to,”

“Yes,” The nervous knots in your stomach release, “please, Coups,”

His nose scrunches as he laughs, kissing his way down your chest, “It’s Coups now?”

“Cheol,” You whine, “you’re stalling,”

“It’s called foreplay,” He licks a firm line between your breasts and moves lower, “have you not been getting fucked right, princess?”

“F-fuck,” Your back arches as his lips travel down over your belly, eyes slipping closed, “Seungcheol,”

He shakes his head, his hair brushing against your skin, “No more baby?” He makes a sulky noise with his tongue against the back of his teeth, “Come on princess, call me baby,”

Your mind is spinning, and you gasp sharply as his fingers finally slide through your wet slit and land at the apex, pressing deliciously down over your throbbing clit, “Ch-Cheol, fuck, oh fuck, baby,”

“There she is,” He groans, and as his fingers fall away and his lips take their place. He licks a deep stripe through your folds and groans, spreading your legs open wide with his hands anchored on the backs of your thighs, “You’re perfect,”

You moan as he sucks the tender bud of your clit into his mouth.

“I’m going to do this everyday,” He pants, licking another stripe, exploring every inch of your cunt with his tongue, “you’ll be my dessert every night,”

“Ah,” Your head rocks back as pleasure lights up your spine, “baby,”

“Mm,” He groans into your core, burying his face against you and alternating perfectly between sharp sucks and flicks of his tongue.

You are moving fast, from nothing to desperate something in the span of a couple of hours, but honestly you’ve never felt safer and better and more held than this. His hands roam your body, seeking every soft place he can grab and squeeze and hold onto, and you just know the bruises on your hips will be worth it when he finally fucks you.

“Come on,” He tips your hips back to get better access, wrapping his arms around your thick thighs, “don’t be shy,”

“Oh, shit,” Your hand flies down to grip his hair and anchor your position as he manhandles you, your other hand gripping the cushions, “just like that,”

He sucks harder and flicks the tip of his tongue against your bud again, quickening his pace and listening carefully for your sounds to know what you need. Looking down between your legs you can barely believe the sight, but there he is, Choi Seungcheol with his face glistening. His lips are puffy and red, his eyes hooded, and he grins when he sees you watching before nodding just a little and redoubling his efforts.

Your legs are trembling now, the start of your orgasm building up through the base of your spine and flooding warmth into your belly, and if he wasn’t holding you so tightly you’re sure you’d snap.

“Baby,” You whine, your voice sounding not quite your own as heat floods in your chest, “oh, God, please don’t stop,”

He sucks hard, shifting to kiss your core and push the tender muscle of his tongue inside you, “I’ve got you,” he pants as he works his tongue faster, “I’ve got you,”

He’s a mess, wet with slick across cheeks and sweat on his brow, and you think for a split second you might actually be in love with this man already, no one has ever, ever treated your body quite like this. As he shifts to tease your clit again, building the pleasure up and up higher, you grip down on his hair harder.

“I’m,” You stammer out, your back arching and your mouth falling slack, “I’m gonna,”

He nods into you but doesn’t stop the pace of his tongue one bit.

“I’m,” You gasp again, “coming, fuck, I’m coming,”

It hits you all at once, punctuated with his sharp suck to your clit and your legs snap shut around his head, your body wrenching sideways as the wave takes you from conscious to that hazy middle space of pleasure. You can barely breathe, you can't even think, all you can do is feel pulse after pulse of pleasure.

“Fuck,” He curses, and your brain connects enough to realize your legs are still snapped tightly shut around his ears but you can’t get your body to respond, “yeah, fuck, there you go,”

Everything you are is trembling in his hands.

“I could fucking die happy,” He says, shifting to nip your plush thigh with his teeth, his hands gripping down on your curves, “right here between your legs,”

You make a sound, you think, and he chuckles against your skin.

“Mm-mm,” He sighs pleasantly, his hands running from your thighs to your hips and down to cup your backside, “you’re fucking gorgeous, y/n, I love every fucking inch of you,”

“Y-yeah?” Your eyes flutter open.

“Mhm,” He flicks his tongue over your clit once more, eliciting a deep shudder from your hips before he says, “I can’t wait to fuck you,”

Your legs start to relax, and you look down, “Then fuck me,”

“I want another first,” He shakes his head, “please, let me make you come again, sweetheart,”

“Oh,” You shiver as he kisses your slit again, letting his tongue linger, “fuck,”

He sighs, “This pussy,”

“Cheol,” You blush hard.

“I would do anything,” He smiles, flicking your clit again with his tongue, “for this perfect fucking pussy,”

“Anything?”

He goes still between your legs and then he nods, wetting his lips with his tongue, pressing a kiss to your quivering cunt, and looking up over your body to meet your eyes, “Anything.”

“Will you come up here?” You reach for him, “Will you hold me?”

He eases your legs down off his shoulders and shifts up, “Yeah, of course,”

“Will you,” You nearly come again just at the sight of a sizeable wet spot on his sweats, and you tug at his shirt to try and silently communicate your need, “I want to touch you too,”

“Mhm,” He stands up, shucking off his clothes as quickly as he can, and when he pushes down his boxer briefs your muscles clench.

When you were younger, a teenager inexperienced with sex and boys, you imagined his cock. You saw the faint outline of it once through a pair of athletic shorts and you wondered what he might look like naked. You wondered if you would like his body. You wondered if he would like yours too. You can’t really remember what you imagined Seungcheol’s cock to look like, but you know this is better. It’s long, but not too long, like the guys who can’t fit it in all the way without smashing painfully into your cervix, but it’s thick. His cock is heavy, deserving of the word, and perfectly straight until the very end where it curls up towards his abdomen.

You want him inside you so badly you could cry.

“You okay?” He says as he slides up the couch next to you, your naked hip against his.

“A little nervous,” You admit quietly, turning towards him on the cushions and drawing him closer with your hand on his shoulder.

“Me too,” He says softly, maneuvering until one arm is wrapped around your back and your head is pillowed on his other, your chests flush against each other, his cock trapped between your stomachs.

“God,” You shift closer to him, tangling your legs together, “you’re so hard,”

He nods, sighing at the way your skin drags against his, “You’re making me insane,”

“Good,” You smile, finding his lips with yours, tasting yourself on him and dipping your tongue into his mouth as you deepen the kiss.

He groans against you, and you snake a hand between your bodies to wrap around his aching cock. “Oh, fuck,” he curses as you pump your hand up and down his shaft, “easy, it’s been a while,”

“Yeah?” You soften your grip a little, rolling your hand at the tip and feeling precum bead up and smear on your belly, “Saving yourself for me, baby?”

He moans softly, his eyes rolling shut, “You’d like that wouldn’t you?”

“Maybe,” You kiss the corner of his mouth and pump his cock a little harder.

“L-let me touch you,” He pants, his hand pushing your hips back just enough so that he can fit a hand in between your thighs, “can I touch you?”

It’s dizzying how much he begs to pleasure you, and you’re starting to think maybe this is part of what he needs, but you’re still new to each other’s bodies and learning and you suppose you’ll have time to figure all of this out. It’s not just a one night thing.

“Touch me,” You open your legs for him and he immediately slides his fingers down your slit to your aching entrance.

“Don’t stop,” He urges you and you realize at the feeling of his fingers you stopped pumping your hand.

You smile, kissing him again and finding a new pace with a stroke of your hand and a roll of your wrist, “You feel so good, baby,”

“So do you,” He pants, and then he pushes two fingers inside your slick walls.

You choke out a wine, pushing your hips forwards into his hand so he can go deeper.

“God,” He holds you firm with his other hand, “you’re too tight,”

“Too tight?” You huff, still working your hand over his cock, “never gotten that complaint before,”

“Not a complaint, princess,” He teases, drawing his fingers out of your channel before thrusting back inside, “but I need to prep you a little, I don’t want to hurt you,”

Your muscles clench down around his fingers.

He laughs softly, “Oh, yeah, babygirl? You want me inside?”

You nod, a whine trapped on your lips, “Cheol, please,”

“Shh, shh,” He shifts, effectively sliding down the couch a little more while you slide up, and he rests his head on your shoulder and adjusts the angle of his arm so he can pump his fingers in and out of your channel at a steadier pace. He watches the way his fingers disappear inside you with rapt attention, cursing when he feels you grip down on him, “You want to come again?”

“P-please,” You’re doing your best to keep working your hand, but at the way his fingers are curled inside you and pressing rhythmically against your sweet spot you think you’re about to see stars again.

“Fuck, baby,” He sighs, “you’re so sexy,”

All you can do is moan, grip down on his shoulder and let him have you.

When he pushes in a third finger to stretch you, you gasp tightly at the sensation, the pleasure rocketing up your back and making your brain buzz.

“Are you close?” He pumps his hand harder, finding your nearby nipple with his tongue and your body arches again.

“Close,” You pant, your legs widening as you try to brace yourself, your hand falling away from his cock and gripping down on his thigh as the rolling wave of your orgasm starts to wash up over you.

“Come for me,” He’s gripping you hard, like you belong to him and he wants only to please you, and his words combined with the way his hands lay on you leaves you coming apart at the seams.

The sound of it is obscene, wet and filthy and pornagraphic and you’ve never in your life had sex with someone for the first time and had it be anything close to perfect. Your bodies want each other with such need. It's entirely outside your conscious brain, and you think if he can love your body like this then maybe he can love all the other parts of you, and you never want to let him go.

Your orgasm hits you harder than the first, locking your body up in spasmodic elation, and he curls around you when you twist to make sure he works you through the crest of it, his hand only slowing down when the pulses of pleasure start to ease.

When you come back to earth, you’re pressed face down onto the couch instead of up, your cheek against the cool fabric below you. Seungcheol is wrapped around your body like he’s glued to your back, and you feel his soft breath against your cheek and shoulder, his easy kisses on whatever part of you he can reach. His hand is still tucked underneath you and between your legs, cupping your cunt warmly and just holding you as you come down.

“Cheol?” You murmur, your brain almost a little foggy at the heady feeling of two full body orgasms.

“Hey, there you are,” He kisses you again, “feeling okay?”

“Mm,” You nod, “so, so good,”

He smiles, “Yeah? Did I get you?”

You laugh against the cushions, shaking your head, “Babe, I just came so hard I blacked out,” your body stretches, pressing your core into the cup of his hand, “you definitely got me,”

“Mm,” He rocks his hand and you sigh a little overstimulated sound, “should we stop here?”

He doesn’t know, you realize it suddenly, he has no idea how badly you want him. He’s been so focused on your body, your pleasure, your wants, but you can see it now in the hesitation in voice that he still doesn’t know for sure if you want to be here with him or if you just wanted someone.

He’s been touching you like it might be the only time, his only chance to have you and hold you in his arms. Didn’t he believe you when you said it wasn’t one night?

“Seungcheol,” You wriggle in his arms, “baby,”

“What’s wrong?” He gives you the space to roll and you twist against him.

You see his eyes when you turn, like he’s waiting for something and you curse yourself inside for not telling him like he was telling you. You smile, pushing his shoulder until he’s flat on his back, “What’s wrong is that you’re not inside me,”

“O-oh,” He gasps as you hook a leg over his hips and straddle him, your body hovering over his prone cock.

“Mhm,” You drop your body over him, your slick slit nestling directly over his cock, “but I’ve been so selfish,”

He shakes his head to protest but you lay your fingers over his lips to stop him.

“I want you, Cheol,” You drag your hips and find the head of his cock so you can dip and press it against your entrance, “so fucking much,”

He’s breathing heavy against your hand, your eyes locked on eachother.

“Do you understand what I’m saying?” You stay steady above him.

He nods, just a little.

“I’ve never wanted anybody like I want you,” You tell him, “never,”

His lip quirks a little, a small smile as he presses a kiss to your fingers, “I’m all yours,” he whispers.

You sink your hips back in one smooth flush motion, taking him inside you to the hilt without warning, and his head falls back as he moans. He’s stretching you out wide and full, his thick cock pushing into every spot inside you that you didn’t know could feel like this.

“Oh my fuck,” Your body moves on it’s own, rocking your hips in a circle to take him deeper and roll your clit across his pubic bone, “Cheol, Cheol,”

He blinks hard, finding your eyes at the sound of his voice, “Yeah?”

You feel strangely like you might cry at the rush of endorphins, and you roll your hips again, whining out a need, “Hold me, please? Please, touch me,”

Seungcheol softens, his hands unclench on the cushions below him and he coasts his warm hands over your thighs, your hips, up and down your sides, “I’m right here,” he murmurs.

You relish in the feeling of it, and you direct them from their wandering comfort to a landing place on your hips, the perfect soft place for him to grip in with his fingers and keep you steady while you work him. He follows your lead, watching you above him with no hesitation, and his mouth falls slack when he watches you get your position right on your knees and lift up to draw his cock out of your warm, wet channel.

“y/n,” He pants tightly.

You sink back down hard and he groans, cursing and no doubt leaving a pretty bouquet of bruises where his fingers press down.

“Your cock,” You moan as you bounce again, finding a steady rhythm, “you feel so perfect,”

“Yeah?” He bounces you, teeth clenched as he tries not to come too early.

“Made for me,” You grind down and jolt against the pleasure, “never felt something this good,”

He groans, a hot pant of breath and then he stutters his hips upwards, “D-don’t, I’ll come,”

“Good,” You sink down and back up, feeling him stretch you open again and again.

“Come here,” He reaches up for you, tugging you down by your neck to get you close and you can feel him suddenly reposition and change the angle, take back control as he pins you to his chest and pumps his hips.

The way his cock punches into you, curved and pressing directly into your g-spot, makes you choke out a moan and dig your nails into his chest.

“Say you love my cock,” He pants suddenly in your ear, “if it feels so good, say it, tell me,”

You moan sharply, “I fucking love your cock,”

“Fuck yes,” His hand claps down on your ass and grips you tight as his hips piston upwards.

“Ah, ah,” Your legs are trembling again, “I can’t,”

“Yes, you can,” He pants, “I want to feel you come on my cock, babygirl, squeeze me,”

Your eyes slam shut.

“So fucking tight,” He breathes, “so wet,”

“For you,” You choke out and hips stutter.

“Oh, f-fuck,” He pushes up hard, but instead of thrusting he locks his hips there with your bodies pressed flush together and at the sound of his sudden moan, the way his hands lock tight on your body, the way warmth floods your belly, you know he’s coming.

Your brain somersaults and you rock your hips, trying to keep catching the friction against your clit to help push you over the edge, “Ah,” you whine, “no, please,”

He doesn’t go anywhere though, he just presses his hips up to keep giving you the pressure you need and holds your hips down with his broad hands, and you hear him hiss at the overstimulation but he groans and manages, “Come baby, you’re so close, there you go, there you go,”

You’re saying something, but you can’t really hear it. All you can feel is the bubble about to burst inside you as you drag yourself fast and frantic against his body. You’re needy and seconds away, falling into trembles again.

“So beautiful,” He mumbles, dragging your mouth up to his and locking you in a heady kiss.

“Cheol!” You squeak against him, body cracking apart into shakes as you come, probably louder than you wanted to as you fall into the sweet space between his neck and shoulder.

“I’ve got you,” His softening cock slides out as you come, but he slides a hand between your thighs and rubs fast circles on your swollen clit, “fuck, look at you, god, you’re such a mess,”

Your brain is dizzy as he talks you through the edges of your orgasm.

“So wet,” He bites down softly on your shoulder, “soaked for me and full of my cum, fuck,”

As you collapse on his chest, your orgasm receding, his hand slows, but his fingers stay slipped between your folds in the messy mixture of your slick wetness and his release. You are a mess, but he seems to like it and if you’re benign honest so do you.

“I’m so,” You breathe out, shaky and exhausted, “god, I don’t know,”

“Mhm,” He sighs, and finally he slides his fingers out of you to rest on your hip, his other hand stroking a line up and down your back while you recover together.

You need to get up, run to the bathroom and get the shower started, but you’re boneless and floating and he’s just the perfect temperature, so for a little while you don’t move.

When he shifts his hips under yours to readjust your eyes pop open and you start to move, “Am I hurting you?”

“Shh,” He wraps his arms around you and gathers you tight to his chest, “don’t you dare go anywhere,”

“Yeah?”

“You’re perfect,” He repeats and you smile against his skin, “next time I want you sitting on my face,”

You laugh against him, “Next time?”

He’s quiet, his fingers still dragging up and down your spine, “If you want,”

You shift up in his arms, settling on his chest so that you can see his face, “So much,”

He cups your cheek, brushing his thumb along your face, as he smiles, “I missed you, you know,”

Tears prick at the back of your eyes and your throat goes thick, and you don’t trust your voice but you nod and press your lips to his, “I missed you too, all the time,”

He gives you a moment, just staying calm and kind with his hands, and then he leans up to capture your lips once more, this kiss so much softer and more familiar from the frantic emotion a few minutes ago. His kisses travel from your lips to your forehead and then he smooths back the tangled mess of your hair, “We should get cleaned up,” he murmurs, “how are you feeling?”

“Like I might not ever walk again,” You joke wryly.

“I didn't hurt you, did I?” He leans to look you over, “I got a little carried away,”

You shake your head, “No, I’m perfect, I promise,”

“We didn’t talk much beforehand,” He notes, brushing his palm over the swell of your hip, dipping at your hip crease, and tracing up over again at the curve of your thigh, “I just want to be sure you’re feeling okay with everything,”

“I’d tell you if I wasn’t,” You press, “you know I would,”

“Good,” He sighs.

You stretch on top of him, your knees aching from your curled position and you smile, “You want to get a shower? We can share the hot water,”

“You’re insatiable,” He quirks an eyebrow at you.

“Not for sex,” You slap his chest lightly as you climb off him, wincing at the sudden stretch of your knees, “I can barely move,”

“I like a challenge,” He sighs, rolling off the chaise and stretching long and you catch yourself watching the strong flex of his back, the cut of his shoulders, the curve of his ass and his muscular thighs.

Maybe you could rally.

Seungcheol turns and his eyes flick over your body too, “Yeah,” he nods, “I think I can get one more out of you,”

“My shower is shockingly small, so,” You reach for him, guiding him down the hall with you, “we’ll see,”

“I said I like a challenge,” He shrugs, and all of a sudden you can’t stop laughing.

Your shower is small, but in the end it doesn’t matter. Seungcheol ends up crouched on his knees anyways, with one of your legs hitched over his shoulder while he takes his sweet time with his tongue bringing you up to your softest, easiest orgasm of the night. You trade lazy kisses in the warmth after, the suds long gone and your fingers pruned by the time you fall into bed.

You don’t have to ask him to stay, he just does. You talk for as long as you can keep your eyes open, stories of years ago when you saw him almost every single day. You whisper late into the night, until finally he falls asleep first, his head lolled to the side, but his hand still wrapped tightly around yours.

You tumble into sleep right alongside him, his skin smelling of sweet peach and nectarine.

In the morning, you wake up to something cold suddenly pressed to your cheek and you start to stitch together the world around you in quick threads.

“Kkuma,” Seungcheol’s voice reaches you first, a hushed whisper as he tries to get his dog’s attention, “come here girl, let her sleep,”

You groan a little, and you realize the something cold was Kkuma’s very wet nose against your cheek. Instead of listening to Seungcheol, she presses her nose to you again and follows it up with a lick, her panting excitement pushing you from laying on your side to your back as she collapses over your chest.

“Kkuma!” He exclaims quietly, “down girl!”

Your eyes start to pop open, and this time you see his dog’s fluffy white face inches from your own, delighted that you’re awake.

“Kkuma,” He tries to drop his voice to a lower tone to get her attention.

“It’s okay,” You yawn, reaching up to scratch Kkuma behind the ears, “I’m awake now,”

“I’m sorry,” Seungcheol moves into your bedroom, and you can see he’s fully dressed and has been for some time, “I didn’t think she would just jump on you like that,”

Your brain is still a little sluggish and you rub your hand over your face, “Did you go home?”

He grins and nods at your sleepy question, the answer obvious from the dog on your chest, “Yeah, I needed to run home and take her for a walk, I hope you don’t mind I let myself back in,”

“Not at all,” You smile up at him, “I’m just sad you’re not in the cuddle pile,”

“We can fix that,” He tosses his beanie on your nightstand and then holds up a little carrier containing two coffees and a few little pastry bags, “and I bring gifts,”

“From that place by your apartment?” You brighten, recognizing the stamped logos on the cups.

“Mhm,” He passes over your cup, “sugar, no cream,”

“You remembered,” You push yourself up in bed, Kkuma adjusting herself to snuggle into your side, and accept the cup, “thank you,”

He lays his heavy denim jacket on the chair by your dresser and slips back into bed with you, dragging the covers back over both your legs, “Of course, I did, not that much could have changed in a year, right?”

“Mm-mm,” Your legs slide together as you tuck under his arm and settle back into his chest.

His fingers play with the ends of your hair while he sips his coffee, and then he sighs, “y/n,”

Your stomach freezes and you wonder if you’re about to get let down easy. If waking up in the morning cleared his head, if a text from Mingyu changed his mind, if on the trip back to his place he worked out the right way to break your heart, if he practiced it out loud in his car with the dog.

“What’s up?” You say, hoping you sound far more casual than you feel.

“About Gyu,” He exhales heavy, his coffee leaning against his thigh as he gathers his words, “listen,”

“Don’t,” You murmur, pressing your eyes closed, “please don’t go,”

“Go?” He asks.

“I’ll tell him, and I know he’ll be fine after the shock wears off,” You twist in the bed to look up at him, “please just stay, last night was… Cheol, please just think about this,”

His brows knit together tight in confusion and he sets his coffee on your bedside table to free up his hand and brush it along your cheek, “I was going to say, about Gyu, I’m meeting him for lunch at two. I’d like to tell him about us today,”

“You what,” You blink.

“I’d like to tell him that I picked you up after your date,” He says, “and that we got to talking, and that we kissed,”

You can almost see Mingyu’s wide puppy eyes as he realizes where the story is going to go.

“And that I asked you out on a date,” Seungcheol finishes, “and he’s going to ask me a lot of other questions which I definitely am not going to answer, except one thing,”

You swallow nervously, your coffee almost tipping to the side forgotten in your hands until he plucks it up and sets it to the side.

“He’s going to ask me if I’m serious about you,” He says calmly, like you’ve discussed this before, “and I’m going to say yes, but that’s the kind of thing you should know before your brother does.”

“You’re serious about me,” You say it back, your heart picking up as the words come off your tongue.

“Yes,” He nods, unequivocal, “and I hope you feel the same way because before I drive across town and tell my best friend I’m in love with his sister, I just need to know if you feel even a tenth of that,”

Your heart should be pounding, your stomach fluttering, your body flooding with emotion at the casual confession, but all you feel is calm. Mingyu told you once that life would fall into place, you just never thought you’d have that realization while it was happening around you.

You try to keep a straight face when you say, “There’s only one problem,”

“Okay,” He says, but you watch his hand fidget in his lap.

“You never actually asked me out on a date,” You point out with a smile, “and I don’t want to lie to Mingyu about anything,”

He grins, his tongue dragging against one side of his teeth as he shakes his head in disbelief, “You’re right,” he says, “that’s my mistake, will you go out with me?”

“I’d love to,” You lean into him so you can press a quick kiss to his lips and take his hand in yours, lacing his anxiously twitching fingers with yours to hold him steady, “and if Gyu gives you any lip about this,” you kiss him again, “tell him I’m in love with his best friend,”

“You are?” His fingers tighten on your hand.

“Mhm,” You suddenly can’t keep your lips away from his, “and you tell him that if he does anything to ruin this, that I’ll make him sorry,”

“Now that,” He laughs, “that I believe,”

You pull him down to you and your body without another word, and with a hushed apology he pushes Kkuma off the bed so he can splay you out in the middle of the mattress. He takes you fast, hurried and full of need now that you have so much time ahead of you for slow. For now, you have a lot of catching up to do.

When you finally make it out of bed the coffee is cold and Seungcheol is late for lunch.

#honeyhotteoks updates #honeyhotteoks fics #seventeen ff #seventeen fic #svt fanfic #svt ff #scoups x reader #seungcheol x reader #choi seungcheol #scoups #scoups fic #scoups smut #scoups ff #seungcheol smut #seungcheol fluff

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euaphoric · 10 days

Text

𝟎𝟏. 🥛 ✶𓏲ּ “ i want to sew all my love into you ” — [ 정국이 ]

he was comfort, security, and need, all in one. it had a name; home <3

pairing ◞⁺⊹ husband!jk x wife!reader genre ◞⁺⊹ married/domestic au, pwp, slight age difference (jk is older by 5 years)

warnings ◞⁺⊹ insane tooth-rotting fluff bc i’m in need of high dopamine levels, cute n soft smut, you’re a clingy wifey, minor mentions of anxious/sad thoughts, o/c is kinda whiny and hella attention/touch-starved, o/c just misses her bby fr, daddy kink, major impreg kink, foreplay, they get all sentimental n mushy gushy at the end agghhh, aftercare bc koo is the literal definition of the perfect husband ^_^ wc ◞⁺⊹ 4.6k

音楽 — eyes locked, hands locked by rv

i’m vv excited to be back and writing again, i missed it sm ;(( i did this poll i few days ago and this idea won but i’ve decided to write them all so this is the first of three !! (〃ﾉωﾉ)ﾟ+°

summer days grew humid, each was hotter than the last. though it isn’t your least favorite season, you prefer to spend most of your time indoors as the heat often makes you feel faint and the air can be suffocating. usually these lazy, torrid afternoons were shared with your lovely husband, either you two would be laid up on the sofa or in bed watching your favorite shows/movies but today went a little off schedule.

you were all alone in your bedroom, feeling a bit sulky as your husband wasn’t around to tend to your needs or give you any affection. it’s not jungkook’s fault though; he’s been toiled away since this morning, offering to help your parents move and rearrange some of the new furniture that arrived today. you decided to stay at your family beach house this summer for a change of scenery, you hadn’t been here since you were seventeen, let alone seen your parents in person since last year. spending some quality time together has been long overdue and you couldn’t be any happier about it.

both your parents absolutely adore jungkook, they thought he was the sweetest, kindest, most generous person they’ve ever met— which says a lot considering they’ve never been a fan of anyone you dated previously. when you introduced him to them a few years ago, they had slightly pre-judged him based off his outward appearance, assuming that he wouldn’t be the type to take relationships seriously or even want to settle down and get married someday. but not even hours later their perceptions of him changed drastically, your parents could tell that he was a genuine soul who loved you unconditionally and would do absolutely anything for you.

that very same day, your mom spoke with you privately to express her virtuous first impressions, saying how much she loves him already and this is who you should’ve been dating from the start. your parents had extremely high standards for your future partner, especially your mom— but jungkook exceeded every single one of their expectations, checking all the boxes off their list. “i can tell just by the glint in his eyes whenever he looks at you… he’s more than in love, he’s infatuated. the way he talks about you as if you’re the most wonderful thing to have ever came into his life— he’s definitely going to be the one you’ll marry.” your mom gets all teary eyed as she spoke those last few words, picturing her one and only daughter all grown up, in a beautiful wedding dress, finally getting to see you live your happily ever after.

not even a couple months after graduating from uni you got engaged to the love of your life, proudly getting your degree you worked your ass off for and becoming a soon to be wife. you had to move across the country for a job offer of a lifetime but it was worth it, jungkook was beyond supportive in any decision you made and was there with you every step of the way, holding your hand through it all.

shortly after moving, you two got married and the rest was history, it was stressful dealing with so many life changing events all within a span of such a short time but you somehow managed. had it not been for jungkook’s constant encouragement and willingness to work/talk things out, you would’ve been a complete trainwreck. he was the balance you needed to keep yourself afloat, you felt so lucky, more than blessed to have a caring, understanding man like him.

the more you daydream about him, the more you wished he was holding you right now. you’re feeling lonely, so empty, and a little sad, his absence fills your mind with restless thoughts, hoping that he’ll come to your rescue soon enough. before jungkook, you were highly independent, never needed anyone to take care of you because you did everything for yourself; he never gave up on gaining your trust and has shown time and time again how dependable he is. you’ll forever admire how much effort he’s put into getting to know you over the years, that no one’s ever came close to making you feel the way he does— so high as if you’re soaring through the sky, living in heaven on earth.

he was the main provider of the household, you didn’t have to worry about anything nor lift a finger, all you did was focus on your career. you had a worry free lifestyle, the perfect job, perfect husband, what was there to possibly complain about? most aren’t so fortunate to be in your position so you never took any of it for granted. you love him more than anything in this world, you couldn’t stand to be away from him for another minute, you miss your hubby so much :( you craved his presence near you, needing him around you physically, wanting his soothing touch to ease your mind.

you wanna feel his sunkissed skin against yours, his warmth, the way his scent clouds your senses as he trails kisses down the curve of your neck, tangling your fingers in his dark, wispy hair. you want to lay your head on his broadened chest while snuggling up into him, hearing the gentle sounds of his heartbeat, intertwining your small hands with his large ones. you desire for him to kiss you everywhere, leaving no surface of you going untouched, pinning your body down between him and the mattress, like a flower pressed into the pages of a book and all that’s written is his name over and over. so many different scenarios play in your head as a means to pass the time, but they can only keep you sane for so long.

you’ve grown desperate for him at this point, finally coming out of your room to see what he might be up to now, searching the entirety of the house. you ended up finding him downstairs in the living room with your mom right beside as verbal assistance, not only did he lift and move most of the furniture but now he’s helping to mount up the new TV without even breaking a sweat in the process. was there anything he couldn’t do? probably not, he was a man of endless talents. your dad was sent out to go grocery shopping so your husband was pretty much doing everything on his own while your mom simply watches in amusement.

she was yet again impressed by your husband’s handy work, “wow jungkook, you’re really strong!” he was indeed. now you’re getting flashbacks to when he’d manhandle you and lift your body with ease in one swift motion to switch positions. his hands needed to be all over you right this second or else you’ll simply die of attention starvation. “mom, are you gonna keep him busy all day? ‘m getting really boreddd.” you childishly whine as if you weren’t a fully grown, married adult. to be fair though, it’s been hours since you’ve seen him and as much as you wanted to give him some space to help out around the house, you still had your needs to. the need in question being him in your bed, immediately.

“why don’t you go sit by the pool or something? you’ve been cooped up in that room since this morning, get some fresh air!” your mom suggests an alternative to wait but you shook your head in an instant, “nuh uh, too hot, i’ll melt like an ice cream cone!” you’d rather stay locked inside your air conditioned room than having to deal with the searing hot sun baking you well done at 450 degrees. “i’m almost done sweetheart, promise.” jungkook quickly reassures before hammering one of the nails into the wall, the way his veins would protrude through his arms as he repeats the action made you mindlessly clench your thighs together. he could make anything look insanely hot, it was almost unfair.

✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦

after another twenty minutes or so he was finally done and now free to go, thrilled to have him all to yourself once again. you practically yanked his arm off as you led him up the staircase but your mom had one more thing to say, “will you be helping us tonight with dinner? i’m making your favorite!” he turns for a second to answer, “uh- yes of course !” that enthusiastic, bunny-like smile of his that you’ve grown to love for so long never fails to make you melt, just so effortlessly pretty without even trying.

but now you realize that you only have a limited amount of time with him, great… you’ll have to wait even longer to have him exactly as you’ve imagined. there’s only so much pent up sexual frustration you can take, you’ve been patient for almost eight hours. that’s probably the longest you two might’ve gone without having sex— okay maybe that’s an exaggeration but you do have a very active sex life with your husband, you try to do it at least twice a day and if you’re both feeling a little friskier it can sometimes go up to 4-5 times~.

your sex drive used to be quite low, never really seeing it as a huge necessity for you— until you met jungkook, of course. there was an immediate sexual attraction that you felt towards him, you’ve never felt so drawn to anyone before, he was irresistible. you’ve had some internal issues with your performance in the bedroom, it took a lot for you to reach your peak but could never get yourself to finish (unless you did it yourself) but with jungkook? that’s a whole different ballgame. you could simply cream in your panties just from kissing those luscious lips of his, he ignites a fire in you that’ll never wither into ashes.

once the door to your room was closed, both his hands found purchase around your waist, caging you into him and pulling you in for a deep kiss, melting right into his hold. your bodies flowing with pure lust and greed for him, not even thinking twice as your hand travels down lower to palm him through his sweats. he let out a breathy chuckle from your sudden actions once he pulled away, “someone’s feelin’ kinda slutty tonight.” he teased, which you took no offense since that’s just your collective humor.

“mhmm, ‘m only the biggest slut for you. now stop neglecting your wifey and gimme all your love.” since he hasn’t been giving you much attention all day you were acting a bit whiny about it, jungkook didn’t like that word though, neglect? that just wasn’t something in his vocabulary when it came to you. “huh? don’t ever say that again, you know i’d never purposefully neglect you, ever.” he made sure to emphasize that, he knows you weren’t being serious but it does hurt a little to know you may secretly feel this way. he loves you and you can feel it without him even needing to say it, that’s how intense it is.

“it was just a joke koo… didn’t mean it like that.” you jut your lip into a tiny pout, leaning in to kiss him again but he turns away, denying you the void of what you wanted most. “a joke is supposed to be funny last time i checked.” he retorts before sneaking off to make a beeline towards the bed, confused when you don’t follow suit after him. “what’re you standing there for? get your little butt over here.” he impatiently demands, patting his lap for you to sit on top. you listen and make your way over to him, straddling his lap with both legs on either side of him as he brings you in closer. he wraps his arms around your waist again, tightly holding you in his grasp, your frame sinks right into his chest.

he locks his lips with yours, kissing you slowly, taking his sweet, sweet time; what’s the rush? you had the rest of the night at your disposal. needy hips languidly rock back and forth against his semi hard-on, the fabric of the pajamas shorts you wore were so thin you could feel his cock throbbing underneath. you audibly gasped when he brushes up against your weak spot, it feels amazing, your panties turned into a sticky puddle from the pleasure; moaning into the kiss as he inhales your sighs. you were more than hungry for him, you were ravenous— only the taste of him could quench your avid thirst. you’re already as close as you can be but you wish to be even closer, if it was impossible you’d crawl into his skin and fuse your bones together to become one, you’re so in love it sickens you.

“need you to touch me,” you whimper for more when his lips drew from yours momentarily, “please.”

jungkook loves seeing you like this, his pretty wife acting all hot and bothered just for him, but he’d lying if he said it wasn’t the same way for you too. “where baby ?” his warm breath against you leaves a shiver to your spine, his voice low and raspy. “everywhere.” you beg in desperation, “just wanna to feel you, need you so bad…” you continued to grind your core onto his clothed erection, becoming even whinier as time passes.

he smirks at that answer, knowing that he’s the only one that can have you in this way. “need you too baby,” his tone is nothing short of a whisper, lazily rutting his hips up to match the pace of your movement, “been thinkin’ about you all day, can’t wait to fuck this little pussy.” his middle and index finds your clit to rub through your pajamas, making you bite your lip so hard it’ll leave a bruise. you’re both so horny and desperate for each other like some hormonal teens, you’re about to explode from how sensitive you are, your whole body feels tingly.

“jungkook!” a familiar voice shouts from a distance, it was muffled but you know that was definitely your mom who just called for him. “come back downstairs, i think something’s wrong with the remote, it’s not working— help !” she sounded a bit overdramatic which is how she usually is most of the time. you groan in annoyance, getting even more frustrated that you had to stop, all you want is some private alone time with your husband but no, the universe said not today! you really wanna curse your mom for being a total cock block right now .. -_-

๑ ๑ ๑

“i’m gonna put a baby in you someday.” your husband casually says while rubbing your stomach, his inked skin splayed across your bare form. “in this cute little tummy right here.” he points near your belly button, planting a small kiss to it. you two were finally alone once again and this time it was for good. after jungkook helped your mom figure out what was wrong with the remote (it wasn’t broken, she just forgot to put a new set of batteries in) and ate dinner with you and your parents, the night was bound to end like this.

this isn’t the first time he’s said something like this and it surely won’t be the last, but you burst into a giggle, “quit kidding around kook.” he’s always playing around but you can count on one hand how many times he’s actually finished inside you, since you’re not on birth control for health reasons you have to be extra careful to not end up getting pregnant. there’s been a handful of times where he’s had to run to the store and get you a morning after pill which you’d just hope for the best and leave it up to the universe. you have noticed that jungkook has been more vocal about wanting children lately, so maybe he’s hinting at finally taking the next step.

“and if i told you i wasn’t?” he shifts slightly, eyes flickering up to stare into your gaze. “would you let me paint your walls ? give you a baby so i can see my stunning wife bear our children?” the thought of you carrying his child pops into his head a lot, probably on an hourly basis— he’s more than ready to start a family, but he’s still not sure where you stand 100% on the idea. there was no pressure on his side, but it’s important to make sure you’re both on the same page.

your hands snake up to his chin, cupping it firmly, ready to make the final say once and for all. “yes koo, i’ll let you do anything to me. i trust you, i trust us.” that’s all you need to withstand through any obstacle(s), trust and trust alone. if that doesn’t exist, the foundation will be sure to crumble— disintegrating into nothing. you’ve never trusted someone as much as you do jungkook, he’s the reason you even get out of bed at times, makes you want to push yourself to become a better person. real love is the refusal to never give up on one another, even through the toughest, most ugliest moments.

what you’ve come to realize is that you have all of him and everything he’s promised to provide is all yours; his heart, his last name, his vow to stay by your side forever— through sickness and health. he’s given every single aspect of himself he has to offer, the only thing left that’s missing is a tiny addition that carries both you and jungkook’s DNA. you’re more than curious to see what the outcome will be, harboring no regrets inside. jungkook’s smile grew wider, feeling faint tears rim his eyes at the thought of you putting all your trust in him. you have no idea just how much that means to him.

his head lowers back to your torso, imprinting a trail of kisses, slowly making his way down further and further. your skin feels as if it’s on fire, boiling hot like the scorching summer heat. he took an ample amount of time to worship your body, leaving wet kisses to your inner thighs, “i’ve wanted this for so long…” he hums against your flesh, insides buzzing with raw passion and desire. “want to finally do this together.” he gently nibbles, a faint bite mark appears to which he repeats on the other side. “your tits are gonna get even bigger, more plump and so full of milk,” he continues, elated with so much enthusiasm, “that pregnancy glow will make you even more gorgeous.” he wasn’t saying all of this for nothing, he truly cannot wait to experience it all, how your belly will grow each month, all the random/weird food cravings you’ll get, and gracefully handle any sudden mood swings.

you were aching for him, you couldn’t even answer back, your heads reeling with too many thoughts— the thought of him stuffing you to the brim with his cock. you were topless but wanted him to take off the rest, wanted him to fuck you until your body physically shakes and you can’t think of anything but him being buried balls deep into your sousing cunt. you had to savour every last bit of this though, etch every little detail in your brain to replay as a supercut one day; remembering the time you two made love to conceive your first child.

jungkook’s slender digits move skillfully to hook around the waistband of your shorts, tugging them down along with your drenched panties. “it’s crazy to me how this is all mine,” he pauses to admire your glistening arousal, scooping it up with his one of his fingers to have a quick taste. saccharine. “i have the prettiest, sexiest, hottest wife in the whole fucking world.” he’ll never not compliment you, even when you’re old and gray he will always remain the same. “stopp~” you toy with your bottom lip, cheeks turning rosy at his constant sweet talk. then you become a pile of mush, simply too absorbed with pleasure as he sunk one of his digits into you, thrusting in and out slowly. “fuck.. feels s’good- please don’t stop.” you beg for this to never end, bidding all concept of time to vanish in hopes of it lasting infinitely.

“we’re going to create the most beautiful family,” he coos, licking a stripe to your clit, swiping up and down as he continued pumping his fingers in your wetness, “just you and me.” he only came up for air to say those last few lines, diving right back in to drink up your deliciousness. his tongue adds light pressure to your overly sensitive bud, making you twitch and subconsciously jolt up— his free hand forcibly brings your hips back down, locking you in place so you have nowhere to go— forced to take all that he gives you. paradise. that’s what this is. you’re already close to the edge, the broken moans that escaped your lips are like a soft ballad to his ears, cursing under your breath, panting, crying out his name repeatedly.

“ah! s’close… don’t stop, don’t stop..” you plea so pathetically, voice getting shakier as you reach your climax, his face was soaked, fucking drenched. he’ll willingly drown, submerge himself into the flood of you, no other place he’d rather be than between these perfect, plush thighs. he drives you into further insanity when his pace drew more rapid, finding the ultimate sweet spot. the lethal combination of his fingers and his tongue working to give you a mind blowing orgasm, all you could do was utter feeble, plaintive cries, latching onto his fluffy hair as you ride out your sudden high that’s stampeding into you full force. your body goes inert, limbs pliant beneath his embrace. “you did so good for me angel, m’so proud of you.” jungkook briefly pecks both your thighs, giving it a little smack once he comes back up to face you again.

he quickly discards the rest of his clothes, but everything’s moving in slow motion. his movements are frantic yet it still wasn’t quick enough, he needs to feel you so badly. his manhood throbs against your folds, sliding his shaft between the puffy, saturated lips, making such delightful sounds. “quit teasin’,” you whine, not in the mood for prolonging this anymore. he doesn’t say anything, just twisting a smile in response, but he’ll give you exactly what you want. who is he to deny his wife’s orders? so he finally enters you, filling you up little by little, inch by inch; and when he’s fully settled in, your walls clench around his length immediately. “never fails to amaze me how i fuck this little pussy on the daily but you’re still so fuckin’ tight… always squeezin’ me babe.” his breath hitched towards the end, already sounding so pussydrunk from the way you suck in the entirety of him.

your legs hook around each side of his waist, keening at the way his cock drives into you, slow but sensual, moving your hips to match his rhythm. “be good for daddy and wait for me. wanna cum together.” he husks, to which you obediently nod at his request. your jaw slacks open wide from his cock hitting your walls beautifully, each stroke he gave sent you to a further state of delirium. he picks up his speed a little more, his brain empty with no thoughts but this warm, dewy pussy swallowing him up, groaning as you leave scratches along his back. jungkook’s sweet compliments never stop, they only intensify. ‘you’re all mine, and i’m all yours baby’ ‘your face looks so pretty when it’s all fucked out’ ‘love fucking this perfect little cunt’ and ‘i love you so much, my angel baby.’ it brings you to the verge, strings of shattered moans evade your senses.

your hands greedily come up the sides of his face, pulling him in for a frenzied, yet passionate kiss caging him in just in case he has second thoughts, trapping him with no choice but to cum inside. “shit— keep going like that and you’re def getting pregnant tonight.” he groans against your lips, this only made you clench around him tighter, “please daddy- wan’ your cum, put your babies in me..” you want him to paint your walls white, milk him for all he’s worth and some. his strokes get sloppier as his high approaches, squeezing your thighs as he plunges deeper. it doesn’t take much longer for him to shoot a hefty in load inside, planting every bit of his seed as the waves of your second orgasm ripples through you. you’re both heavily panting and gasping for air, when he pulls out you’re left empty again, but at least you were stuffed with his hot cum. he looks down at the mess he’s made, sodden and creamy, picking up some that’s spilled out of your cunt to push back in. “we can’t let any go to waste, right ?” “mm… yea.” you bit your lip, still shaking, electricity flowing through your veins.

he topples over in exhaustion, way too tired to move. well, at least for now— he’ll be able to go again in another hour or so. “you’re going to be such an amazing mom,” he says while snuggling up in the crook of your neck, “remember the day i asked you out? i thought you were gonna say no.” that was random… but also jungkook is known for saying the most unexpected shit at the oddest times. “what ?” you were so confused, firstly this came out of nowhere but also why would he ever think that? it was basically love at first sight with each other. “wasn’t nearly as confident back then, i used to practice in the mirror how i’d do it.” he chuckles at those old memories, in hindsight none of it was necessary because he didn’t say any of the lines he rehearsed. defeated the whole purpose.

“since the day we first met i knew you were the girl i’d spend the rest of eternity with.” his fingers trace down your spine as he spoke, you’re so overfilled with joy that you could cry. you regret absolutely nothing, the only thing you do is all the other men who came before jungkook, all those losers who were wastes of time, but that journey has led you here and this is where you’ll stay for the rest of your life. it still feels like the honeymoon stage with him, a never ending blissful rollercoaster. “i want to sew all my love into you,” his hands danced around your skin, inhaling your natural scent, you feel so soft and smooth. “thread by thread, seam by seam, i’ll tether our intricate souls together.” you hummed to his words, he’s a romantic at heart just like you, he still writes occasional love letters to you and is always doing something to bring a smile to your face— whether it be coming home with your favorite candy, buying you flowers, or taking you out on cute, fun dates. every day is like a new surprise, never knowing what you’re gonna get when it comes to your husband’s spontaneity.

you’re both a little sticky, sweaty, and smell of nothing but pure sex. jungkook ends up carrying you all the way to the bathroom, deciding to run a nice, relaxing bath for the two of you. he adds your favorite lavender bubble bath, making the water extra bubbly and soapy for you which he knows you love. when you're both in the bathtub, your backs facing him as he uses a pink loofah to clean you up, embedding gentle kisses to the nape of your neck and shoulders as he does it. he held you for what seemed like forever, just admiring each other’s company while under the water, almost falling asleep right in his arms.

✦•┈๑⋅⋯ ⋯⋅๑┈•✦

let’s make the circle

that’s inside of us.

every day it rotates like that,

color me ☆ 彡

am trying to write longer stufff, i enjoyed writing this story a lot, lmk what you think . ! ! !

to see more chaos click here (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ ♡♡♡ (｡･ω･｡)ﾉ♡

#jungkook smut #jungkook fluff #jungkook x reader #jungkook imagines #jeon jungkook x reader #bts smut #jungkook fanfic #bts fanfic #jjk smut #jungkook scenarios #jungkook fic

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retroactivebakeries · 1 year

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It is almost five centuries ago, and the girl who will one day be a swordswoman is lying in the red-tinged mud. She can't get up—broken bone? severed tendon? She can't tell. She's yet to cultivate her palate for pain. Her enemy towers over her, a cataphract mailed in screaming steel and poisoned light. His warhammer falls, and it is death, forever death, death unconquered and unconquerable.

"No," says a part of her. She is not even seventeen years old. Her body is mangled and broken, wound piled upon wound piled upon wound. A dull kitchen knife is her only weapon, though she lost that in the mud the second her grip faltered. Her enemy is no thing of this earth. And yet—

"No. It is not death, forever death, death unconquered and unconquerable. It is only a hammer, falling. It is only 'an attack.'"

And the girl understood.

~~~

It is the better part of three centuries ago, as best the swordswoman can reckon, and she is beset on all sides by foes. They are not monsters—just mountain bandits, or highland rebels, as one cares to see it. But they outnumber her by dozens, and even an exceptional swordswoman might struggle against but two opponents of lesser skill.

From in front of her, beside her, behind her they advance, striking from every angle with spears and blades and axes. Others fill the air with arrows, sling stones, firepots. It would be effortless, to parry any single blow. It would be impossible, physically impossible, to defend against them all.

"No," says a part of her.

"You are not outnumbered. You do not face 'multiple' foes. It would be impossible to defend against every attack — but there is no 'every' attack. Only one."

"Oh," the swordswoman said. And it was, in fact, effortless.

~~~

It is eighty years ago, or thereabouts. A coiling spire of stony flesh and verdigrised copper throbs like a tumor on the horizon, coaxed from the earth by spell and sacrifice. It is the tower of a sorcerer-prince, and a birthing place of abominations.

Seven locks of rune-etched metal are opened with her single key. Wretched shapeling beasts, grown by sorcery in vitreous nodules, flee wailing from her, absconding before she even draws her blade. Demons sworn to thousand-year pacts of service find the binding provisions of their agreements unexpectedly severed.

These things dissatisfy the sorcerer-prince. He waxes wroth. He makes signs of power and chants incantations. With a flask of godling's blood, he draws the binding sigil inscribed upon the moon's dark face. With cold fire burning in his eyes, he speaks the secret name of Death. It is a king among curses, all-corrupting, all-consuming, and it falls from his lips upon the swordswoman.

"No," she says, and she turns it aside with her blade.

The sorcerer-prince's brow furrows. How did she even do that?

"Parried it."

But—

"With my sword."

No—

"See, like this."

Stop—

"Well," the swordswoman finally says, "I figured that if I just...looked at it right, and thought about it, and construed your curse as a kind of attack...then I could block it."

That's not how it works at all!

"If you insist," says the swordswoman, shrugging, and decapitates him.

~~~

It is now. It is the end. Death couldn't take the swordswoman, not when she'd spent all her life cutting it up. At times, Death might sidle up to one of her friends, or peer down into a grandchild's crib, and she'd just give it a look. That's all it took, by then.

Heartache couldn't take her, either. Bad things happened to her, and they hurt, and she lived in that hurt, but if it was ever more than she could take...she'd just, move her sword in a way that's difficult to describe. And she'd keep going.

Kingdoms fell, and she kept going. Continents crumbled and sank into the sea. Her planet's star faded and froze. She started carrying a lantern. Universes were torn apart and scattered, until all that had been matter was redistributed in thermodynamic equilibrium. With one exception.

But now it is the end. There is no time left; time is already dead. The swordswoman has outlived reality, but there is simply no further she can go. This is not a thing that can be blocked. This is the absence of anything further to block.

"No," says the girl who will one day be a swordswoman. "This isn't the ending. And even if it was, it's not the ending that matters."

The swordswoman looks back at who she was, at the countless selves she's been between them. She looks forward, at the rapidly contracting point that remains of the future. She grasps the all of linear time in her mind, and sees that it is shaped like a spear.

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gyu-effect · 4 months

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could i request a dk fic where the reader is a lresenter at an awards show and has to read out the winner for one of the daesangs ( like mama album of the year award where they won!) and how all of it goes down and stuff ( like the reader and dks relationships public knowledge so it makes jt even more fluffier!!)

PAIRING || Seokmin x Female Reader

GENRES || Fluff, Idol!Seokmin, Idol!Reader

WARNINGS || none

WORD COUNT || 0.6k

A/N || i'm so so sorry this took me so much time. but i really loved this idea tbh it was just so cute! i hope you like this fic. requests are open !!!

TAGLIST || @romeosbreastmilk @y00nzin0 @cecedrake2217 @candidupped @ashkuuuu @hanicore @alyssng @weebotakuboy @angelfeverdream @aaniag @sea-moon-star @thepoopdokyeomtouched @winterbeartaehyungbestboy @mnstxmnbb [if you want to be added to my taglist, fill in this form!]

[00:08]

“wait, what? don’t tell me-” seokmin gasped, staring at the stage with eyes wide open as you walked in with a bright smile, bowing and greeting the audience seated.

“didn’t you know?” seungkwan asked, to which seokmin shook his head in negative, mouth still hanging open in surprise. how come you had never told him this before? even yesterday when the two of you had talked before going to bed, you had not even mentioned it in passing when he had said that he hoped that they would win a daesang this time.

but now that seokmin thought more about yesterday’s conversation, he realised that you had said that you had a surprise for him. was this what you had meant?

“i didn’t. i didn’t know at all. ” he replied. “but y/n did say she had a surprise for me.”

you smiled at the crowd once more before greeting into the mic. “good evening, everyone. a beautiful night, isn’t it?”

seokmin smiled involuntarily, feeling his heart melt at the sweet way you were talking. then the he heard the scream, causing him to finally tear his eyes away from you and look at the screen. to his surprise, the camera had panned to him to capture his expression, and he felt his cheeks heat up.

“don’t make it so obvious.” minghao snickered beside him, causing him to elbow him lightly. but some of his members like soonyoung had begun pointing at him and then at you, before making hearts, causing the crowd to go more wild.

seokmin felt his heart burst out of embarrassment even more as he watched you too faltered at your speech a little, biting your lips so as to not smile too much.

“hey.” chan said, his eyes lighting up. “maybe the surprise was that the winners of album of the year-”

“and the award goes to…” you said, carefully opening the envelope. then your eyes crinkled as you smiled even more brightly, before leaning into the mic once again. “seventeen!”

the roar around him was almost deafening. he felt someone yank him up by an arm and pull him into a hug, as he tried processing what was happening around him.

they had won? they had won? but wasn’t he just staring at your face a few seconds ago-

the next thing he knew he was being pushed on to the stage with the entire group. he could feel people still applauding them and congratulating them from behind and he felt his heart swell with happiness.

they had won. after all these years of hard work, they had finally won a daesang.

as he approached you, he could feel himself getting giddier and giddier. you were beaming at him with such a proud smile, that seokmin felt like he was in heaven. he could not have been happier than ever. he had the best members, the best fans, he was doing what he loved and finally being rewarded for his hard work. and he had you.

you, who had tears in your eyes right now as you carefully handed the prize to jeonghan, before he indicated you to give it to seokmin instead. you, who loved him and cherished him so much.

and right now, the entire screaming of the crowd died down to nothing as all the lights dimmed around you, causing you to practically glow as you silently whispered a congratulations. seokmin felt his own eyes prick with tears a bit, being brought to reality only when his own members ‘ooh’-ed with the crowd when the two of your hands met.

as you bowed to the members one last time and made your way out, seokmin saw you secretly wave him a tiny goodbye.

turning back to the crowd, he let out a happy sigh. he had to thank you for your surprise later on.

#╼ 𝐅𝐈𝐂𝐒 #╼ [𝟎𝟎:𝟎𝟖]#╼ 𝐀𝐒𝐊𝐒 #caratlibrary #seokmin x reader #lee seokmin x reader #lee dokyeom x reader #dokyeom x reader #dk x reader #seventeen x reader #seventeen fluff #dk fluff #dokyeom fluff #lee dokyeom fluff #lee seokmin fluff #seokmin fluff

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nevernonline · 4 months

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✧.* must love dogs; csc one shot.

✧.* synopsis: after a breakup (three years ago) your friend finally attempts to get you back on the saddle by creating you a dating profile despite your protesting, hooking you up on dates with some of the eligible bachelors of their choice, none of which impressed you. until one day you met the boy with the dog.

part of my seventeen movie series.

paring: seungcheol x reader (y/n uses she/her pronouns.)

genre/s: fluff, strangers2lovers

warning/s: alcohol mentions, swearing, cigarette mentions, swearing, some pg-13 jokes.

word count: 3.7k

note: im notorious atp for not editing, pls. I hope you enjoy my lil must love dogs inspired fic, its one of my fav movies!! xo.

“So how was bachelor number five?”

With a roll of your eyes, you gazed at your friend Seungkwan resting his feet on top of your shared glass coffee table, ticking the tip of the city guide book and magazines rested on top.

“Boring. He was nice or whatever, good looking, but he wouldn’t shut up about league of legends and his job. Other than that he asked me no questions about myself or what I do. A failure as most would call it.”

“So I take it you wouldn’t want to go out with him again?”

“God, whatever gave you that impression? I thought you could tell we were headed for marriage?”

“Hey. I’m doing you a very nice thing, you don’t have to be so sarcastic about it.”

“Look, I know. But just because Jun is getting married and I still haven’t moved on doesn’t mean I need to be dating all of the sudden.”

The boy patted the seat next to him. Scooching over from his spot, making room for you on the couch.

“ It’s been nearly three years since you ended it with him. At least fuck someone before you dry up.”

“That’s fucking gross and what vibrators are for.”

A small scream left your friend's mouth as he covered his ears trying to remove what he had just heard coming out of your mouth.

“Y/n his wedding is in two months, we need to find someone to bring that’s not me. You don’t want to feel the embarrassment of his pity party and everyone feeling sorry for you.”

“Why can’t you just be my date?”

“Too obvious. Plus your whole family will be there, just do it or you know your parents will be in your case again. This ‘ secret man’ you’ve been seeing doesn’t exist and I think your Mom is starting to catch on.”

He was right. Your parents come from a high status, as do your ex boyfriends, they were the reason you both had met and became friends in the first place. But, when your relationship ended you lied to them, it was working well until you got a call from your very upset mother telling you Jun showed up to your house with his family and a girl on his arm that wasn’t you.

“Okay, then why can’t I choose my own date?”

“The men you chose to quote on quote date are literally disturbing, I’m sorry but it’s the truth. Like that one dude you brought here last time? Whatever the fuck his name was literally was wearing a necklace vial of his own blood and claimed drinking your own urine and reusing water is the only way we can save the planet.”

“Okay, but he was nice.”

“He literally didn’t flush the toilet because he only went number one. That’s fucked, no.”

“Can I at least, like at the very least have some approval over the men you match me with then?”

“Maybe.”

“ Kwanie, please. Come on, don’t make me use the what goes around card, it’s my turn”

“No, it's absolutely my turn.”

“Not true, you wasted it two months ago when I had to bail you out of that strange house party orgy thing by saying your dog died and coming in crying to a bunch of naked strangers. You owe me.”

“Valid.”

“How did you not realize what that party was anyway?”

“This is not currently about my life failures, but yours my beautiful friend.”

Laughing at Seungkwan's major mishap, you forgot to greet your dog, Lucky. She was waiting and crying at your feet, finally waking up from her sweet slumber to greet you.

“Hello my baby, do we have to go outside?”

“She went for a walk this afternoon, but after her dinner she crashed so she probably wants a walk. I can go if you want to change or shower.”

“No it’s alright, I can take her, you're already in your pj’s and after my date I need a distress, want anything from the mart?”

“Ice cream?”

With a small nod you jumped up, taking the small curly creature in your arms and grabbing her harness before heading back outside into the warm spring air.

Ten minutes into your evening stroll, you decided to sit on the green wooden bench overlooking the water, the same bench your grandmother always spoke about when you asked her the same story about how she and your grandfather got engaged. The gold plaque with their names rubbing off sitting behind your back.

Suddenly you heard a man yelling from behind you, running through the green grass lit up with fluorescent lights.

“Hey, Kkuma, no come back.”

A small white dog came up behind Lucky sniffing her and starting to play, you noticed her cute hairclip and ran your hands through her fur.

“God, I’m sorry. She normally doesn’t run off like that.”

“It’s okay my dog lov-“

As you turned around to look into the round eyes of the owner, you were stunned with how beautiful he was.

His dark hair pushed under a cap, a white t-shirt too big for his frame sitting beautifully in his toned shoulders, and his red sweatpants matching his shoes.

The unfamiliar man was bending down now petting your precious pet and his own at the same time talking to them in sweet baby voices.

“This is Kkuma by the way, and you are?”

“Y/N”

“Hi y/n, you’re so cute, you and kkuma can be best friends if your mom lets you.”

You let out a roaring laugh realizing he thought you had introduced your pet and not yourself.

“Oh sorry, did I say something wrong?”

“No, no. It’s just I’m y/n this is Lucky sorry my fault.”

“Oh god, cool. Sorry Lucky, I’m Seungcheol. You can call me Cheol and this is Kkuma.”

“Nice to meet you Cheol and Kkuma.”

“You too. Look I know I just met you and all, but I’m new to the area. I was wondering if you’d want to get coffee and let the girls hangout sometime?”

“Oh. Yeah, of course. Let me give you my number.”

Seungcheol handed you his cell phone with a new contact page pulled up giving you full reign to type your name and number into his list.

Handing the device back to him your fingers touched, creating an electric shock, to not like you to believe in signs, but for some reason it felt like the universe trying to tell you something.

“Thank you, I’ve actually got to get going, but if you're free tomorrow would you want to grab coffee and hangout at the dog park?”

“Yeah, totally. Just text me a time, we can just meet here. What kind of coffee do you drink? There’s a good spot by my apartment. I can just pick it up for us.”

“Wow, that’s so nice of you. Just a black americano is cool or a cold brew whichever.”

“No fun I see.”

“How would you know that? Just because I don’t like sugary drinks doesn’t mean I can’t have fun.”

“I don’t know, we will see.”

“We will. I’ll catch you tomorrow girls.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“You too!”

Seungcheol left the same way he came running through the grass with Kkuma on his heels, following him all the way back to their home.

Strolling back down the pathway back to your apartment, you could help but feel butterflies in your stomach, you knew nothing about the man you just met other than his name and his cute dog, but there was a lot of unknown.

Smiling like a Cheshire Cat, you unlocked the front door and watched Lucky sprint back into Seungkwan lounging on the couch, eating for the ice cream you had forgotten.

“Where’s the snacks? Also why are you smiling like an idiot you’re freaking me out.”

“We met a guy with his dog, a very cute guy might I add, who actually asked for my number and wants to get coffee tomorrow.”

“ What the fuck, it’s late tell me he doesn’t live in the park?”

“No he said he just moved to the area, he was clearly not a park dweller he had keys, and smelt amazing actually.”

“Smelling strangers? A new low even for you”

“Oh my god, fuck off.”

Seungkwan pulled his phone out and opened various social media apps preparing himself for best friend stalking duties.

“What’s his name?”

“Seungcheol, not sure about his last name, but he goes by Cheol and his dog was Kkuma.”

“Great.. okay, found him I assume?”

“What the fuck, how? Let me see.”

“Eager aren’t we?”

“Fuck off?”

Grabbing Seungkwan's phone from his grip, you scroll quickly through the new faces' social media.

“Yeah, it’s him.”

“Okay, let me see. Wait, he's actually hot AND seems to have his own business?”

“Oh my god.”

“Here, look”

After the next few hours, you and your friend stumble on into your separate rooms preparing yourself for slumber, which never seems to reach you and before you know it dawn is creeping its way through your curtains, and your backup preparing yourself for a day with you and Lucky's new friends.

Something about your energy was excitable and nearing frantic, you could wait to step outside into the fresh air with your pocket sized princess at your side, but it was still early.

You had decided on pampering yourself for this morning, finding the need to make yourself up, you spread on your skin care with glee, drew perfect lines of eyeliner and strained your hair, pulling it up into a nice tight ponytail the hair tie matching the taupe tone of your sweat suit perfectly. Before you knew it it was 9:45 a perfect time for you and Lucky to step outside the door.

Placing her in her tote bag, you stepped inside of your favorite coffee shop, the light pink walls covered in photos and paintings, the smell of the espresso seemed sweeter.

“Morning, y/n you look beautiful today. Would you like the usual?”

“Thank you, for me, yes. But can I also get a large americano, just black and he didn’t tell me iced or hot, so iced is good I think? Or maybe hot with a cup of ice on the side? If that’s okay?”

“He? Did you finally start dating someone?”

“Oh no, just a friend of mine. Seungkwan told you shit about me didn’t he?”

“Yes. Sorry.”

“No worries, can I actually get two of the plain croissants and two of the flower dog cookies too?”

“No problem, it’ll be right out.”

“Thank you.”

Taking a seat next to the pick up counter you scrolled through the instagram of the boy you’re meant to be meeting, telling yourself it’s just to remember his face, but really it was to get a peek into what else he’s into or if he was single.

“Y/N”

“Oh shit, sorry. Thank you guys, see you tomorrow.”

Picking up the paper coffee carrier and pastry bag, you waved goodbye to the baristas and briskly walked back to the bench you were at yesterday, your bench, spotting the back of Seungcheol’s head watching the water with his dog.

“Hey. Sorry I’m late.”

“Oh, no problem. I just got here.”

Placing your items down on the bench, you freed her bag and greeted Kkuma alongside her before taking your seat.

“Here’s your coffee, I wasn’t sure if you wanted hot or iced so I got you a cup of ice too just in case, a croissant, and a little treat for your girl too.”

“Wow thank you so much, hot is fine actually. How are you?”

“Good, nervous. I mean it’s not every day you meet a stranger for coffee.”

Seungcheol laughed, tipping his head back slightly before taking a bite of his pastry.

“Sorry. I know it’s weird, you just seemed like someone I wanted to get to know, and Kkuma liked you so I figured you’re good people.”

“Well, thank you. You too. Lucky generally does not like men other than my friend Seungkwan, my dad, and my ex-boyfriend so consider yourself special.”

“I do.”

“So what brought you to this neighborhood? Work, a relationship?”

“No relationship, but actually my business partner is from here. We decided to open our warehouse and stuff here because it’s much better than doing it in the city. We have a spirit company and we’re planning on opening a brewery and bar, so that’s why I’ve been working late nights. I guess it served me well, I made a friend on my first day.”

“You’ve only been here for a full day? What the hell? You already know the best spot in town. What kind of stuff do you guys make?”

“Beer and soju mainly, we’ve been working on it for five years now and are finally at a spot to open up and start selling it to people, which is cool. But what about you? What do you do?”

“I’m a medical student actually, my parents are both doctors, I used to really want to be one too, but I don’t know, I don’t really have the same passion for it as I used to.”

“Well what would you do if you had the choice?”

“I always wanted to design stuff for dogs, start a rescue, anything like that. I got so happy seeing Kkuma as an accessory girl.”

“Yeah, she’s very stylish. I think you should go for it, you know? Why waste time becoming something for someone else and risk being unhappy just for their sake?”

“Honestly I wouldn’t even know how to start a business on my own, let alone tell my parents.”

“Hey, I didn’t either and look where it’s gotten me.”

You turned back to the water, staring into the calm blue waters, trying not to go into your own head.

“You’re oddly inspiring, I’ll give you that much.”

“Thank you, y/n. You’re oddly sassy, I’ll give you that.”

“Shut up, I’m not.”

“You already tried to clock me by saying I’m no fun because I drink black coffee and you said oddly inspiring like a back handed compliment. You definitely are, but I like it.

“Good.”

You had continued your twice weekly hangouts with Kkuma and her dad for two weeks now, getting excited whenever the days roll around to see the two of them again, but you haven’t hung out once without them around, which made you wonder if your friendship or crush rather on this boy was only due to your dogs being friends themselves.

Seungkwan tried setting you up on more and more dates with more and more duds, he was starting to lose hope himself, knowing that the one person he could set you up with was Seungcheol but he didn’t want to overstep.

Strolling home from another failed connection, you decide to stop and have a beer before going home to give the dirty details to Seungkwan about who you had just met.

Pulling open the tab of one of your drinks from your six pack, you took a deep breath and sat down, feeling your eyes welling up with tears.

Another can opened as you went to take the first sip. A hand comes on your shoulders, whispering a boo in your ears.

“What the fuck!”

Jumping up from your seat the hand on your shoulder belonged to Seungcheol, the look in his eyes went from happy to concerned as he saw the small streaks of tears on your cheeks, you top now dribbled with spots of beer.

“I’m so sorry, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m good. Want a beer?”

“Sure, thanks. I’m sorry I scared you, I thought you heard me behind you.”

“It’s alright, I was in my own world anyway. You look nice, where are you headed?”

“Soft opening for my bar actually, I texted you, but I figured you didn’t respond because you were busy.”

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I would’ve loved to come. I was a bit preoccupied on an awful fucking date.”

“That bad, huh?”

“Worse.”

“Well the good news is you technically didn’t miss it, it doesn’t start for another twenty minutes and you’re dressed very nice. It worked out.

“Fuck I wish I paid more attention, I could’ve got you some flowers or something.”

“Next time. Will your roommate be alright taking care of Lucky?”

“Yeah of course, he knew I would be out tonight. I’ll text him just to be sure.”

“Cheers to hanging out without our kids?”

“Definitely.”

With that suddenly your awful night and doubts about your relationship with the raven haired boy went out the window.

“Shall we?”

“We shall.”

Seungcheol lent his arm out for you to wrap your own around, and you both stayed out that way for a few moments, before discarding your cans and walking the way to his new venture.

“Here it is, you ready?”

“When you told me you were opening this up I thought you hadn’t even started? But it looks like it’s fully ready.”

“Ah, well we had planned to wait a bit, but we’re getting too antsy, so here we are.”

“It’s beautiful, holy shit.”

“Thanks, sit here, I’ll be right back.”

You took a seat on the green leather booth, looking around and taking in the ambiance of the custom lighting and ribbon like wallpaper, when a blonde gentleman walked over sitting down across from you.

“Y/n? Right?”

“Yeah, nice to meet you…”

“Jeonghan, I’m Cheol’s business partner.”

“Jeonghan, right. Nice to finally meet you, I’ve heard a lot.”

“Likewise, you’re so much prettier than Cheol let on actually.”

“Oh?”

Without a chance to interrogate the new face further Seungcheol walked back over to your table, setting down a few bottles of various spirits for you to try, including a couple of cocktails.

“He didn’t scare you too much did he?”

“Not at all, he was just telling me actually how much prettier I am than you alluded to.”

“Jeonghan, don’t do that to her, come on. You know very well I told you she was pretty, I even showed you her instagram, you agreed.”

“I know, I just wanted to make you tell her yourself and my job is done, see you around y/n.”

“Nice to meet you.”

As Jeonghan left the table you felt your cheeks growing with heat, unsure if it was the alcohol or the fact that Seungcheols friend made him confess he thought you were good looking.

“Sorry about him, he’s a menace.”

“No need to be sorry, I have my own menace at home and I don’t mean my dog.”

Seungcheol laughed, pouring you a shot of his very own soju to taste, filling with anticipation hoping you enjoy the drink he’s serving you, looking for your approval became a big part of his mind lately.

Lifting your glass up to his and clinking them together, the liquor poured down the back of your throat filling your mouth with sweetness and warmth.

“Holy shit.”

“Good holy shit or bad holy shit?”

“No, very good. That’s actually delicious. It’s so clean and fresh.”

“That makes me so happy to hear.”

“I’m happy you’re happy.”

“Okay, beer next. This is just a standard sour, some lime and sea salt, sort of beach vibes.”

“Sounds amazing, okay.”

Tipping your head back you sipped at the foamy top of the glass, savoring the flavors in your mouth.

“I hate you so much.”

“What? Why?”

“Seungcheol, you're way too humble when you talk about your business, this shit is amazing. I said I hate you because I’m going to crave this shit and I’ll have to see you all the time.”

“I thought you liked seeing me all the time?”

“You’re okay.”

“I have to say it’s cool to be here with you without the dogs, not that they distract too much, but they definitely take away giving you my full attention.”

“I mean how could they not, they’re cute as fuck,”

“So are you.”

“Wow, two drinks in Cheol and you’re already calling me cute? I wonder what else you’ll say the more you drink?"

“Technically we’re four drinks in, but I guess I remember the time I spent with you more than you do. Did those drinks on the bench mean nothing to you?”

“Oh fuck, I did forget. I guess technically I’m five drinks in then, catch up, bitch.”

You and Seungcheol spent the rest of the night being greeted by his friends, most of them already assuming who you were, letting you know that Seungcheol talks about you more than you realized.

Feeling your blood alcohol content rising, you decided to take a step outside and refresh.

The bell of the door opened up behind you, putting you face to face with his cherry lips once again, watching them light up a hand rolled cigarette to his lips.

“Doing okay?”

“Yeah, just wanted to step out for a second. Are you good?”

“Very. Want a cig?”

“No, I’m good for now. Ask me again later.”

“So will there be a later? You’re not ditching me now?”

“I’d never do that.”

“So, y/n does this maybe get me a chance to take you on a date? I’m kind of drunk so I’m feeling oddly bold.”

“Is this not sort of a date?”

“I was hoping you thought so. Is that a yes?”

“Absolutely. I thought you’d never ask.”

“Before we go on our date though, y/n. I have one final question?”

“Yes?”

“Do you still think I’m boring?”

“A little.”

Seungcheol grabbed your waist and spun you around, causing his perfectly rolled tobacco to fall on the sidewalk.

Blissfully you were giggling and laughing under the red led lights of his bar.

“Take it back.”

“Nope.”

“Please.”

You looked into his puppy dog eyes and did something out of your comfort zone. Wrapped your hands loosely around his neck, placing a deepened kiss onto his lips.

His mouth tasted of cigarettes and salt with a hint of vanilla from the lip balm he always had on him.

“Is that a good ‘sorry I called you boring’ kiss?”

“It’ll do for now.”

“Good. They’ll be more where that came from.”

“Promise?”

“Pinky promise.”

You and Seungcheol unwrap from each other, finding Jeonghan standing and cheering in the window watching the two of you.

“Can’t believe I got a hot date and a sister for Kkuma all in one.”

“You lucky dog.”

607 notes · View notes

kooqitas · 14 days

Text

— beer & brother's friend ... ★

#pairing: seungcheol X reader. #synopsis: your brother goes out to buy fast food, leaving you and seungcheol alone at home. #tags: pwp, vaginal sex, fingering, kitchen sex, spit, creampie. #notes: my first story with seventeen i hope you like it guys!!! #wc: 1,3k

is almost 8pm when you listen your brother laughs so loud, so you go to the kitchen, noticing the all beers bottle that was in the table.

"oh, really guys, did you even call me?"

the first thing that you noticed was how handsome seungcheol looked.

you brother, vernon, and seungcheol was friends a few years, since you and your brother living together, sometimes seungcheol go to the apartament and drink some beers ou watches some movies with vernon.

and yes, sure, cheol always being handsome, and you know that a few months ago he started the gym, you always see his posts on instagram, but damn, his so fucking hot personally.

"so, the princess came to join the commoners" seungcheol played with you.

"i want, but no one invited me..." you pretend a sad face.

"bla bla bla" vernon said. "it even feels like i need to call you for drink"

maybe now, seeing that who is in your home, you probably would dress better, like, the small shorts and thin shirt made you so... basic.

whatever, you take a beer and sit on table with the two guys.

sitting next to cheol, you smell his perfume, damn, he's unbearably hot! it's not like you didn't already know this, but in the last few months he was pushing the limits, having the guy so close to you was making you easily horny.

you drank A LOT a little, the alcohol making you burn every time seungcheol's knee touched yours. the three of you would talk about anything, your brother being visibly the only sober one there.

"i think that i wont see you since you started dating, how's going?" seungcheol questioned, taking a beer in his lips.

"she broke up, his boyfriend cheated her... with her friend" vernon laughed, your brother really gave you all emotional support, but now his just laughs a lot.

"shut up!"

"oh, is real?" cheol questioned. "i'm so sorry for that!"

"she don't care" your brother said again. "she cheated him back... with his brother."

"WITH WHOM? oh god!"

"guys... i'm still on this table..." you said.

"and i'm not!" vernon joked. "i'm taking the fries, give me a second"

so your brother go to cooktop, leaving you and seungcheol alone.

seungcheol had a look that you couldn't identify, but it gave you goosebumps, the truth is that you always had a crush on your brother's friend, but for obvious reasons you had never tried anything, it didn't even seem like something reciprocated.

but seungcheol was so fucking hot, you definitely wanted to kiss him.

"oh... his brother?" he asked, a kinda unbeliever.

"is not a big deal, ok? his fucked with my friend, i just... go deeper... isn't my fault, his brother fucked me too, like, i'm not haved sex alone..."

"yeah, sure, i understand..." his said.

"oh, really?"

he approached, whispering in you ear.

"sure, like, if i was his brother, i wanted to fuck with you too... actually, wouldn't even wait for him to cheat you for that."

cheol laughs, squeezing your thigh in a less than affectionate way, his eyes are dark.

fuck, he was hitting on you?

"guys, the fries burned..." vernon laughed.

"oh, i'm really hungry now..." you said, looking to cheol.

yes, maybe the food that you want its other...

"i can go to the mc if you want!" cheol sayed to you and vernon.

"oh, definitely NO, you are drunk. i'll go, just let me change de clothes."

your brother went to the room, and seungcheol's dark gaze stayed on you, along with the unchaste caress on your thigh, which rose even further towards the hem of the tiny shorts you were wearing.

vernon came back, saying he would return in 20 minutes and asking you not to break anything in the house.

when your brother left, the amount of dirty thoughts that passed through your mind scared you, you knew you found seungcheol attractive, but wanting to take off your clothes and lie on the table asking him to fuck you wasn't the best thing to think about right now.

you got up, going to get another beer from the fridge, but you were scared by the large body that pressed you against it.

"c-cheol, wh-?"

"tell me that your pretty whore face was a request to me, please!"

"my-my?"

"i’ve been wanting to fuck you for so long... and when i found the courage to admit it, you started dating." he laughed with a laugh that bordered on despair.

what do you mean he wanted to fuck you?

“vernon could come home in any min-”

"i promise to be quick, i know you're wet, hm?" he said kissing your neck, pressing his hips into your waist, making you feel his cock. "i've been like this since i saw you enter that damn kitchen, i planned to wait for your brother to sleep so i could come to your room but..." he kissed your jaw, and you were already overcome by lust. "let me have you now!"

you didn't respond, not verbally, you just took his hand down your shorts, showing the damage your own thoughts had done to you.

he was agile in placing two fingers inside your wet hole, making you moan at the sensation.

"are you already open for me, kitty? if you're a good girl now, when your brother sleeps, i promise to come into your room and make you cum in my mouth... but now let me fuck you with my dick, hm? "

"f-"

you don’t even know how he was so fast, but in the next second you felt his cock inside you, spreading you open as he stuck his tongue in your mouth.

his tongue tasted like beer, and you moaned when it came into contact with yours at the same time as every inch of him entered you further.

"tight pussy, but accepting me so well..." he said before thrusting once, the shock of his balls hitting you.

“fuck” you moaned, closing your eyes, planting your nails on his arm. the mix of lust and burning.

"no, princess, look that... you're taking me so well..." he forces you to look down, increasing the speed of his thrust as he lifts your two legs, intertwining them with his thighs.

you are literally open to seungcheol, he pushes you against the fridge while he fucks you, seeming to take away all the time he wanted you, you feel his vision get blurred with so much information.

"i've wanted to fuck you for so long, you finally broke with your pathetic boyfriend."

he pushes you further against the fridge, lowering the strap of your shirt and exposing one of your nipples, seungcheol spits on one of them before starting to stimulate it with his fingers, using the spit to lub.

"you're always going to give me that cunt now, right? so delicious..."

he kisses you, and then begins to stimulate your clit, sloppy circles taking you to heaven and hell at the same time.

"i'll-"

"please smear my dick all over with your cream, love!"

the touch on your clit becoming firmer as he stuck his tongue back into your mouth, and you came..

the laugh he gave when he felt your cum was one of the most exciting things you had ever heard in your life.

"hold on a little, princess." he said kissing his neck and he didn't stop thrusting into you.

and then he came. filling you completely with his cum.

seungcheol continues thrusting for a few seconds, his cum making his dick slide even better.

"we n-need to stop, my brother..."

"oh right." he releases you. "can we talk about this later?" he questions when he sees you heading towards the bathroom, you nod.

and it takes less than two minutes for vernon to get into the house.

shit, you guys forgot to clean the floor.

364 notes · View notes

thefallennightmare · 4 months

Text

Just Pretend-seventeen

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*

Parings: Noah Sebastian x Musician! Reader

Warnings/Tropes: language, angst, fluff, smut, star-crossed lovers, right person/wrong time, cheating, talks of mental abuse.

Summary: “I can wait for years, heaven knows I’m not getting over you.” A story about two star-crossed lovers, that always find their way back because their souls are entwined. The universe desperately attempts to bring them together, no matter what the cost.

Authors Note: Don't forget your wigs, y'all.

Collaborating With: @thescarlettvvitch(better give her all the love as well)

Tags: @thescarlettvvitch @ozwriterchick @waake-meee-up @notingridslurkaccount @niicoleleigh @sammyjoeee @xxrainstorm @dominuslunae @notmaddihealy @malice-ov-mercy @crimson-calligraphyx @iknownothingpeople @writethrough @thebadchic @blackveilomens Claudia on Tumblr @tobe-written @blacksoul-27 @loeytuan98 @loverofagoodbeard @comfortcharactercraze @lma1986 @plutonikchaos1 @spicywhenspeaking @lyschko666 @somewhere-diamond @hi-fancy-seeing-you-here @koskeepsake @bngurngheart @shilohrosechicken @emzandthevoid

NOAH

“I mean in what world do I go to sleep after you and wake up before you? I don't even know how it happens. Well, I hope you're having sweet dreams and you call me when you wake up.”

The noise of my mouse clicking was overshadowed as I played the voicemail repeatedly, sometimes with different remix as I tried to find the best one. After the initial shock of hearing the song, the voicemail, and realizing my feelings for her, I knew I needed to do something with the voicemail.

Someone knocked on the door of the studio but I didn’t take my eyes off the screen, still working. “Come in!”

“You’ve been in here awhile, just wanted to make sure you’re alright,” Jolly said while pulling up a chair next to me.

I nodded. “Yeah. I’ve been busy working on something.”

He eyed the screen as I worked through the program we used, the voicemail still playing.

“Are you sure you want to use this?”

“I don’t know,” I shrugged with a sigh. “I figured we could remix it and bury it in a song.”

Jolly hesitated. “You’re not worried about her hearing it?”

Finally taking my attention away from the computer, I leaned back in my chair while adjusting my circle shaped, gold-rimmed glasses on my nose. “Clearly she wasn’t worried about me hearing it. Y/N knew what she was doing when she added that voicemail in the song.”

“I want to make sure you know what you’re doing, that’s all,” he said.

“I’ve been working on it all morning but still doesn’t feel right,” I admitted.

Jolly rose to his feet and gave my shoulder a squeeze. “You’ll figure it out; you always do. Make sure you come out and eat something before we leave.”

Waving him off as he left the room, I decided not to go back to the remix so instead I took a break by browsing through my phone. There were three unread texts messages, all from Bailey, but I didn’t feel like reading them. I already knew what she was asking.

Last night she asked if I wanted to hang out with her today but I’d already made plans; one that I wouldn’t skip out on.

So instead of responding to her texts, I browsed through social media for a few minutes before ending up looking through my pictures, stopping on a selfie. It was from when I watched Salem for Y/N while she was in Japan. In the haste of everything since she came back, I realized I never sent it to her. After watching her performance on the live stream a few days ago, something was different.

I love her.

The words felt weird on my tongue, almost foreign. I told the guys all the time that I loved them but this kind of love was different. It hit me really hard, I’ve never felt this way before. I’ve been through so many ups and downs, trials and tribulations with relationships. Sometimes, I couldn’t stand myself- I’d turn every mirror around. With Y/N, she moved and breathed in the same world with me. She was beautiful for the way she thought. She was beautiful for the sparkle in her eyes when she talked about something she loved. She was who she was, and I loved her.

Those feelings always had been buried deep within me but now when I say those three words out loud, it’s as if everything clicked into place. Almost as if that’s the way it's supposed to be with us, despite all the anger, hurt, and trials we’d gone through the last year.

Y/N’s eyes stole my heart. Her smile gave me life. Her presence made me high. And her touch left me breathless.

For now, I tried to hold these secrets inside of me because my mind was like a deadly disease.

My phone buzzed with yet another message, one I tried to ignore but my eyes immediately went towards it as it appeared on the top of my screen.

Bailey: Hi! Not sure if you saw my other message but I’m off work around three today if you wanted to hang out.

Swiping the message away, I went back to staring at the picture, wondering if I should send it to Y/N or not. It wasn’t a favorite selfie of mine but there was a chance she would appreciate it because Salem was in it.

After saying fuck it, I sent Y/N the picture, before deciding to text Bailey, hoping to avoid another one from her.

ME: I already have plans with some of the guys today. Maybe I can swing by later tonight.

As my text to Y/N went unread, I tried not to dwell on it for too long. Until the nagging voice in the back of my mind kept telling me that there was a reason she was ignoring my texts. Just as I clicked on the Hollow Omens group text thread, a private one from Malcolm popped up.

Malcolm: Hey, we’re sorry to do this but Y/N’s in a lot of pain today. She’s doesn’t think she’s going to make it tonight.

Feeling my heart drop, I sat up straighter in my chair, pausing the voicemail I just realized was still playing.

ME: Is she alright? Does it have to deal with her endometriosis?

As I waited for him to respond, I left the studio and headed to my bedroom, rummaging though my desk to look for my notes I took on endometriosis and ways to help elevate the pain. All of us had plans tonight to head to the pier for a night of gorging on street food and watch the fireworks. It was an annual thing our town did, and we figured it’d be something fun to check out. It’s all I could think about the last few days and the slight chance Y/N wouldn’t make it didn’t sit right with me.

When I slipped into my vans, my phone buzzed with a new text from Malcolm.

Malcolm: Yeah, it’s bad today. Her doctor switched up her meds but they don’t seem to help. She’s in the bath right now. But that’s the first time she got out of bed today.

Doing my best to ignore the thoughts of Y/N in the bath, I pocketed my wallet and phone before leaving my room. I passed Orie on the way down the stares and he gave me a look.

“Where are you headed? We’re not meeting everyone until later.”

I waved over my shoulder as I headed to the front door. “I’ve got some errands to run. I’ll meet you guys later.”

READER

I let out a long groan of pain while clutching my midsection, burying my face deeper into my pillow. The bath did nothing to ease the cramps even with the meds. I was apprehensive about changing the dosage but my doctor thought a lighter amount would be fine since the pain wasn’t that bad for the last few months.

The noise coming from my television was a white noise as I readjusted my position on the bed, hoping with me laying on my stomach, it would ease the pain somewhat; it did. I had the blanket pulled up to my chin as I reached for my phone, deciding to send a text to the Hollow Omens group chat to let everyone know I wasn’t able to make it tonight. But a new message from Noah halted that thought as I clicked it open, my breath catching in my throat at the picture.

Mochi 🍡: I forgot I took this picture while you were in Japan. I miss him, I might have to come steal him for the night.

I couldn't stop myself from staring at the picture for an ungodly normal amount of time. His hair was shorter than it was now, Noah must have got it cut when I was gone. But fuck, he looked breathtaking. There was a quick thought of setting this picture as the background on my phone. I didn’t want to have to explain it to the guys or hell, even Bailey if she noticed so instead I opted in setting it as Noah’s new contact picture; replacing the one of him in the braids back from that night.

Noah fit so well with me-with Salem. Like a small family would be.

Oh fuck, stop.

I shook my head at the thought. I blew that chance; over. Done.

Well, maybe there was still a small chance for us?

No, don’t even think of it.

Dusk is just an illusion because the sun is above the horizon or below it. And that means that day and night are linked in a way that few things are there. One cannot be without the other yet they cannot exist at the same time. How would it feel to be always together yet forever apart?

With a wavering sigh as the pain returned, I dropped my phone to the floor as I curled into a ball hugging the pillow to my chest.

NOAH

I knocked on the door with my free hand, the other grasping a bag close to my chest while my foot tapped to a melody I had stuck in my head all day. Ever since trying to remix the voicemail earlier, I had this same tune and lyrics in my head.

“Am I worthy?” I hummed as the front door opened.

Chase doubled back in surprise when he saw me. “Oh hey, man, what’s up? I wasn’t expecting to see you till later.”

I nodded. “Malcolm texted me saying Y/N’s not feeling that great.”

“Yeah,” he ran a hand over his buzzed head while moving to the side, allowing me to step inside. “It’s been one of those days. The pain is really bad, and she hasn’t left her room.”

“I brought her some things, hoping it helps. I know she was excited about our night at the pier so anything to help her feel better,” I held up the bag in my hand.

Chase gave me an amused expression before nodding down the hall. “Third door on the left.”

As I approached her door, the faint sound of her television and a muffled noise gave me slight pause before I knocked softly.

“Angel?”

Nothing.

So I knocked harder. “Angel, it’s me.”

It was a faint, but I heard her grant me entrance, where I slowly opened her door and noticed Y/N crouched in her bed with a pillow against her chest, blanket pulled up to her nose. Her eyes darted from the television over to me, doubling.

“Hey,” I said while shutting the door

“Noah?” She pulled the blanket away from her face as she sat up in bed. “What are you doing here?”

I smiled while setting the back down on the empty side of her bed. “I heard you weren’t feeling well, so I brought some things over.

Y/N stiffened for a long moment before he shoulders fell slightly. “They told you? Everything, I’d assume.”

“Are you upset?”

“No,” she sighed. “I just-I don’t know. It’s a lot to take in and understand.”

I waved her off. “I did my research on Endometriosis; from what Malcolm and Chase told me. So I brought some goodies for you.”

“Oh, you didn’t have to do that,” Y/N’s bottom lip wavered as she let out a deep breath. “Aren’t you busy with writing or-Bailey?”

I didn’t miss the way she stuttered out Bailey’s name but kept it to myself as I began unpacking things from the bag.

“She’s at work, it’s all good. Please, angel, let me be here for you. I’ve got some snacks and other shit.”

A tiny smile pulled at her lips before Y/N eventually nodded. “I mean, yeah. Please, I appreciate this so much, Noah. Thank you.”

I tossed on the bed a variety of snacks and drinks, her immediately reaching for the Reeses Peanut butter cups.

“How’d you know these were my favorite?”

I merely shrugged. “Lucky guess.”

Bullshit. I texted Malcolm to ask.

Our eyes locked, the invisible string that connected us vibrated in my chest.

“You wear glasses?” Y/N asked.

My hands quickly went to my face, feeling self conscious of her tone of voice. “Uh, yeah. I kind of forgot I was wearing them. I left the house in a hurry.”

“You look-,” her words trailed off for a long beat of silence as her eyes shined with light.

I look what, angel?

My fingers tapped against my thigh as I waited for her answer.

Y/N hesitated before answering. “Like a dork.”

Rolling my eyes with a chuckle, I tossed one of her pillows at her as she smacked it away with her own laughter echoing through her room.

“Oh,” I remembered while rummaging through the bag. “I also picked this up. You can always get a better one later but I’m sure you needed something to help a little. I read that heat helps with the cramping from Endometriosis.”

“Wait, a minute. You read?” She teased before taking the heating pad from me with a small smile of thanks.

“Don’t be a smartass, ma’am,” I chuckled. “I just wanted to learn more about this and want to help anyway I can, angel.”

She blinked slowly as she stared down at the heating pad and treats in her hand. “This is-uh. Thank you.

Noticing she was seconds away from crying, I set the empty bag on the ground before reaching for the remote next to her on the bed. “Ok now scoot over.”

“What?” Her gaze finally tore from the things in her hand up to me.

I motioned for her to scoot closer to the right side of her bed while I kicked off my shoes. “Make some room. We’re going to watch something on Netflix while we eat our snacks.”

“Mochi, for real?” Y/N smiled.

“Yeah for real, move,” I pushed her shoulder which made her finally move over towards the other side of the bed.

Making sure there was still space between us as I laid down next to her, I resumed the show Y/N was watching on Netflix as we silently watched while eating the snacks. After some time, I noticed she shifted deeper into the bed and pulled the blanket closer to her chest, a look of pain across her face.

“Are you alright?” I asked turning towards her.

Y/N shook her head. “The pain; it’s really bad. My doctor switched my meds, but it doesn’t seem to help.”

Quickly, I sat up from the bed to plug in her heating pad and handed it to her. “Try it.”

I watched as she adjusted herself in the bed with the heating pad against her abdomen with a sigh. “You really don’t have to do all of this, Noah. I know you must be busy.”

“I’m never busy for you, angel,” I promised while hopping over her into the bed.

The door pushed open with a small meow before Salem jumped up into the bed, immediately climbing and laying on my chest. With one hand propped up behind my head, I used the other hand to pet Salem’s head; his purring overpowering the noise of the television.

“He missed you,” Y/N said, not taking her eyes off the movie.

“I missed him too,” I mused while leaving pepper-like kisses all over the cat's face.

The comfortable silence fell between us again for a long while now with me peering over at her now and then to make sure she was alright. The heating pad seemed to have worked because gone from her face was the look of pain, instead the ethereal look I fell in love with graced her features. I marveled in the one dimple in her cheek as she laughed at something funny; the sound making my stomach flutter. I drank in the sight of how when her hair fell into her face, the lines in her forehead creased as she tried to blow it out of her eyes, failing miserably so ended up brushing it away.

“Why are you staring at me?” Y/N asked, breaking my trance.

“Just memories,” I smirked while grabbing my coconut water and taking a drink.

Her cheeks reddened before clearing her throat, just as the movie ended. “Should we watch another?”

“Actually,” I said while reaching for my phone that I placed on the end table, not disturbing the sleeping Salem. “I have something else to show you.”

“Oh, you do, huh? Is it another selfie?”

I scoffed while giving her a sideways glance. “You’re spicy today, aren't you?”

Noticing another text message from Bailey, I ignored it by clicking on my Spotify app; I chose the playlist I made while waiting in line at the store to check out.

“I made this for you. It’s a playlist of different earthy type songs or meditation sounds. Something to help you with the pain,” I explained while letting her peer over to get a glance at the different songs.

“An Incomplete List of Songs I Love That You Will Probably Love Too (Actually)?” She read back the name of the playlist.

I shrugged. “It’s not the weirdest one. So, which song?”

Y/N hummed while scrolling through my phone as I held it before finally settling on one. “Runaway by Aurora. I love that one.”

My heart stuttered in my chest at her choice; memories came flooding back. She didn’t know it but that song helped pull me out of a dark place in my life.

Running a hand over my jaw, I nodded while clicking on the song and connected it to Y/N’s smart speaker in her room.

As we lay there, listening to song after song, we let the soft tunes ease us into a state of calmness. While I pet Salem, quietly singing along to the words, I heard a soft snore beside me and noticed Y/N fell asleep. Her lips were parted slightly and her chest rose and fell with each deep breath.

Taking off my glasses and setting them on the table next to me, I sunk deeper into the pillow and eyes fluttering shut.

After some time, unsure how long, I woke first to notice that both of us had turn towards each other in our sleep, our faces mere inches from each other and hands grazing over one another in the middle of the bed. The earlier melody still in my head but now as I stared at Y/N, the words now clearing through the fog that clouded my mind.

“Weigh down on me, stay till morning,” I hummed low, slowly brushing a strand of hair out of her face, letting my fingers linger along the skin of her neck. “Way down. Would you say I’m worthy?”

Y/N shifted in her sleep as I pulled my hand away, eyes fluttering open. Our eyes locked, and she gave me a lazy smile. “Oh, we must have moved in our sleep.”

Fuck, my heart, stomach, and dick twitched at her tired voice.

“Did I wake you?” I muttered quietly.

She yawned while cuddling the pillow. “I don’t know. I thought I heard some humming or singing. Do you have a melody in your head?”

I swallowed. “Yeah, guess I do.”

MALCOLM

While walking down the hall, ready to head to the pier, I stopped in front of Y/N’s room to check and see how she was feeling. A shocked hum fell from my lips when I noticed there was more than one body in her bed.

Y/N and Noah were asleep facing each other, their fingers linked; subconsciously or not, it was as if their souls needed to be connected at all times. Salem laid between them.

“Oh man,” I sighed sweetly but there was that lingering fear that Y/N would get hurt again.

After closing the door, I made my way into the living room where Chase was lounging on the couch, playing a drum beat with his hands on his lap. I laid a kiss to the top of his head before going into the kitchen, grabbing a drink from the fridge.

“I didn’t know Noah was here,” I said while hopping onto the counter.

Chase nodded. “He came by a few hours ago. I guess he wanted to help Y/N with the pain.”

I made a low, amused noise. “Seemed to help. They’re both sleeping.”

“Really?”

“Yep, curled up facing each other with Salem between them. Like a little family.”

Chase rolled his eyes with a deep sigh. “They don’t even realize what’s happening; even in their sleep. This thing between them, you read about it. It what everyone looks for. Why don’t they fucking see it?”

I shrugged with my own deep sigh. “Fear? Anxiety? Who knows but I have a feeling shit’s about to hit the fan soon, babe. I really do.”

BRYAN

The large group of us walked down the pier, the loud music and smell of food from the fair filling the air. I walked between Malcolm and Orie, as Noah walked ahead with Folio, Nick, and Jolly. Every so often, I’d catch Noah peer over his shoulder to make sure we were all following.

Bringing the camera up to my neck, I took a few differnt pictures; the pink painted skyline, the crashing of the water underneath, then when Noah peered over his shoulder yet again, I took a picture of him. I began clicking a bunch of buttons to zoom in, noticing Noah wasn’t staring at the camera; more so off to the left of me.

Glancing over my shoulder, I immediately noticed who Noah was watching.

Y/N walked alongside with Michael, Matt, and Jesse, all four of them laughing about something unknown. We were told earlier that there was a chance Y/N wouldn’t be able to make it because she didn’t feel well. Clearly whatever Noah planned for her earlier today helped.

When I glanced from Y/N back to Noah, already seeing that he was looking directly at me. Without saying a word, he told me exactly what he was thinking with a small smile.

I motioned to my camera. “Definitely a keeper; Noah. I’ll be sure to save this one.”

As we reached the main area of the fair, we all agreed on getting some food before the firework show. It was busy, crowds of people pushing their way through to get to where they needed. The occasional shocked expression was thrown towards us as people recognized Bad Omens and Hollow Souls. Thankfully, they stayed away knowing that we all wanted to enjoy our personal time.

Y/N sat at a table with Chase as Noah walked up with two large cups of sodas and a funnel cake, one he clearly was planning on sharing. The three of them attacked the funnel cake as Chase talked about how excited he was for the new drum track he was working on.

Once again, I was stuck watching this fiasco that was Y/N and Noah. There is no confusion like the confusion of a simple mind- this was all easy to us, but for them? Not so much. As an observer to the left eye, forgetting the truth behind what is current; they sat together, chilling out, doing what friends do, but, he looked at her the way all women want to be looked at by a man. I don’t believe I ever looked at a woman that way; at least not yet.

Y/N was beautiful, but not like those girls in magazines, I could totally see why Noah had his tongue stuck in his throat. Around her, he would retreat into this shy, introverted person around her company. Stealing those glances so subtly. She was beautiful, for her ability to make other people smile, even if others were sad, even when she, out of all people, were sad.

Before when I snapped the picture, I didn’t even catch he wasn’t looking over at me at all. His almond eyes were shifted, never me or the camera. Just her; Y/N. I don’t know shit about love, not right now and maybe not even a year from now. But I can say this-there are all kinds of love in this world but never the same love twice. I had a feeling they would find something somehow. The photo I took, the peripheral vision of her staring right back at him was proof.

I raised my camera, recording now, as Y/N walked to throw away the garbage and Noah running up behind her to lift her into the air twirling her around.

“Noah! Stop!” She giggled while wrapping her arms around his neck.

“What?” Noah stopped spinning. “Let you go?”

Y/N shrieked as he nearly dropped her. “No, you idiot! Don’t let me go!”

This short clip of them along with the picture from before were definitely keepers.

NOAH

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Y/N laid a hand on Malcolm’s back as he was doubled over, hands on his knees.

He dry heaved before nodding. “I’ll be fine.”

Chase sighed as he held back Malcolm’s hair. “Babe, you know how sick you get when you eat fair food then try to ride the teacup ride.”

“Fuck you,” he grumbled.

I chuckled as watching the three of them.

“Maybe we should go,” Chase said when Malcolm threw up yet again into the trash can.

Y/N hesitated but nodded. “Uh, yeah. Let me just get my things.”

My heart sank to my stomach because I wasn’t ready for her to leave yet. We were only here for about an hour and the fireworks show hadn’t started yet.

“I can take you home later, angel,” I offered.

Her eyes sparkled with the setting sun as she smiled over to me. “Are you sure? I don’t want to bother you for a ride.”

“I’ll make sure she gets home safe,” I spoke towards Chase.

He nodded while helping Malcolm stand up straight. “Have her home by midnight.”

Y/N scoffed. “A curfew?!”

I squinted my eyes. “12:30?”

She looked between the two of us, disbelief on her face, until Chase reluctantly agreed with a nod. “Not a second later!”

“I hate you, fuckers,” Y/N seethed with a hint of a smile before waving goodbye to the two of them and muttering something about needing to use the bathroom before the show.

“I’ll wait right here for you,” I said; with more meaning behind it than she might have realized.

She patted my cheek. “You’re a good man, Noah.”

Playfully pushing her away, heart pounding loudly in my chest, I watched with careful eyes as she walked over to the restroom to make sure she was safe. In that time, Jolly, Folio, and Jesse came up to me.

“The others found a great spot on the beach for the show,” Jolly informed.

I nodded while pointing to the bathroom. “Y/N’s in the bathroom. I said I’d wait for her.”

Folio was texting away on his phone as Jesse spoke next. “Where’s Chase and Malcolm?”

“Malcolm got sick so Chase took him home,” I chuckled. “I offered to drop Y/N off later.”

Jolly raised a brow. “Are you sure that’s a good idea? Weren’t you planning to go hang out with Bailey?”

My eyes snapped over to him at the mention of Bailey. “I’m not going to fuck Y/N in the car.”

Folio’s eyes snapped up from his phone. “You fucked Y/N in the car?”

“Oh my god,” I pinched my eyes shut with a groan.

Jesse peered over Folio’s shoulder to his phone. “Oh shit. She wants to see that movie? I saw a trailer for it last night. It looks fucking sick.”

“Hey, fuck off!” Folio scolded while putting his phone to his chest.

Out of the corner of my vision, I saw Y/N walking back towards us but stopped when someone stepped in her path. She gave whoever it was a tight smile as they rambled something, talking fast with their hands.

“Who’s that?” Jesse asked.

“Must be a fan with how excited he looks talking to her,” Jolly said.

Y/N tried to speak, but the guy didn’t let her; kept rambling as he pulled out his phone. I didn’t miss the way she stiffened, clearly uncomfortable. My eyes narrowed as it watched intently to make sure this guy didn’t try anything.

Why does it matter? You’re with Bailey.

“Noah, are you going to go all Jack Nicholson on him or what?” Folio joked.

“What?” I shook my head. “No-I’m just watching from afar to make sure she’s alright.”

At first, I thought I wanted to be set free from the pain of Y/N leaving me that night. I thought by being with someone else it would help deliver me from her hands, but it hasn’t. I watched the dude talk and talk and talk. She wasn’t into it, but it wasn’t my place to intervene. I wanted too.

I’m going to stand right here, with my hands in my pocket. I’m going to stand right-oh, what the fuck!

I watched as the guy went in for a hug but it wasn’t a small hug. This was deep as his hands grazed up and down her back while her hands gently patted his. I could tell from here that the grip around her was tight and Y/N was clearly uncomfortable.

Fuck this.

Before I knew it, I was walking over, my gaze never leaving this fucking guy. I watched his hands, his entire figure embrace her.

No. Absolutely fucking not. You want a hug? Go for the hug that looks like a pat, you don’t need to be holding onto her for dear life.

I closed the distance between us face, my feet flew with force. My breathing was deep, huffing and puffing. I wanted to deck him. I shouldn’t, but I do. This mother fucker did even realize what a privilege it was to be even touched slightly by Y/N.

As I approached them from behind, neither of them noticing me yet, the guy said. “You’re fucking talented!”

She is, we know that -now leave.

“And you’re fucking beautiful, so beautiful, are you with somebody? Can I get your number, maybe go out?”

This guy kept rambling on and I tensed, my skin felt like cactus.

Y/N’s soft, polite voice spoke up. “I’m already spoke-” she stuttered. “No, not right now. But I’m not interested. I’m sorry.”

Why the fuck was she apologizing?

“Oh damn,” the guy’s shoulder dropped as his hands were buried in his pockets. “That’s too bad, I’d love to take you out, and show you a great time.”

This mother fucker wasn’t getting the hint.

I kicked the leg of the table that was next to them, making a noise as my face never leaving his. I bore into him.

They turned their heads over at me, a relieved expression crossing Y/N’s face. “Oh, hey. I was on my way back!”

A low noise rumbled in the back of my throat as I crossed my arms. “Hi, angel. Are you alright?”

Before she could speak, the guy cut her off when he pointed to me. “Holy shit, you’re Noah. From Bad Omens. What’s up, dude?!”

I wish I could say I was amused, even flattered, but I wasn't. I didn’t care if he was a fan of the band to be honest.

Get the fuck out of her face. Don’t touch or look at what’s rightfully mine.

Well, technically that not true now is it?

Ignoring the voice, I nodded towards the guy as I stepped closer to Y/N.

“Sup man, did you get your photo? Cause we have places to be.”

I was more hostile with my words than I realized but I didn’t care. He could tweet about it.

He noticed the tension. “Uh yeah, yeah I did. It was lovely to meet you Y/N. Thanks so much.”

“No problem! Have a good one,” Y/N gave her best smile.

He walked away, and I watched him, tilting my head as he looked over a few times before finally turning the corner, disappearing behind a crowd of people.

“Noah,” Y/N’s soft voice turned my attention to her. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” I nodded. “Are you? He seemed a little too fucking friendly, no?”

I was forceful with my words. I had no right to be, but I couldn’t stop seeing red.

“He was just a fan, Noah, it’s normal. You of all people should know that.”

“I get it, trust me. I only wanted to make sure you were safe. He looked at you like-”, I stopped myself before I even began.

Like how I fucking look at you and it pissed me off.

She shifted on her feet. “Like what? It was harmless flirting.”

“Hm, didn’t look like it. He looked at you like he wanted to devour you.”

“Noah, I can’t control that shit, no more than you can,” Y/N sighed, almost walking away from me.

My heart still was pounding hard in my chest as I reached for her elbow, gently pulling her back towards ms.

“You’re right, I’m sorry. I just wanted to make sure you’re alright.” I gave a small smile.

“I’m good, thanks mochi.”

She smiled at me; that same fucking smile that brightened any room she walked in. It paled in comparison to the setting sun behind her that painted the sky in pink and gold. I took a small step towards her, fingers itching with the need to grab her face so I could kiss her, until I felt my phone buzz in my pocket.

Without looking at it, I knew it was Bailey. She sent me a text awhile ago saying that she could order us some food tonight if I came over, which I responded with four words; I’ll let you know.

“Uh,” I swallowed while taking a step back. “Everyone found a great spot for us on the beach for the fireworks. Are you ready?”

“Hell yes, I love firework!” Y/N bounced on her feet.

As we began walking down the pier, both of our hands swinging so close to each other, I felt her skin on mine a few times.

“How’s the pain?” I asked after a moment.

“Good. I mean it’s still there but thanks to a certain someone,” she bumped her shoulder with mine, “the heating pad helped a lot.”

This time, I linked our hands together just as we reached the beach, and gave it a squeeze. “Of course, angel.”

I thought back to the last time we were on a beach together; us playing in the water after we both discussed parts of our past that made us who we were today. She was with Trey but that moment, I’d never seen her more alive and free.

Time traveling again, it was so easy to do it in her presence. Going back in time, things weren’t simple then either; but in those moments it became what I know of it now; everything to me.

My phone buzzed again which caused me to groan as I pulled it out of my pocket, expecting to it to be Bailey but it shocked me to see it was a text from Matt; a screenshot of a conversation on Twitter.

Met Y/N of Hollow Souls, so fucking beautiful and incredible in person. I’ve always been a fan of hers, but her music is great too. Holy fuck! I got the balls to ask her out. She said no lol all good. Still a fan. Always.

My grip around my phone as I felt the anger fester low in my gut before reading the next tweet.

Noah of Bad Omens was there with her and was a fucking prick. All good. Damn shame cause the music is good.

I snorted when I then read Matt’s own tweet in response.

Listen to the music for the right reasons then.

I responded to Matt with a few laughing emojis, still ignoring Bailey’s text, and pocketed my phone just as we reached everyone else on the beach. They were scattered either in chairs or on the blanket and the only open spots were on said blanket with Orie and Nick. We sat next to each other, fingers brushing against one another as we leaned back, staring up to the now dark sky while we waited for the fireworks. Y/N shivered, and I reached for my sweater that Jolly remembered to grab from my car.

“Cold?” I asked.

She nodded. “I should have brought something heavier.”

I handed her my sweater, and she took it with a thankful smile. “Thanks Mochi.”

Orie peered over to us, a sly smirk playing on his lips, but I ignored him as Nick patted my shoulder, showing me his phone.

“Death of Peace of Mind comes out at ten o'clock tonight,” he muttered quietly.

Shit.

I bit the inside of my cheek but nodded. “She was bound to hear it, anyway.”

As I turned back towards Y/N, the fireworks began, loud cracks of coloring lighting up the sky. She stared up with wonder and excitement as she pulled my sweater closer to her chest. While everyone watched the beauty in the sky, I watched the beauty in front of me that was Y/N.

An ordinary beginning, something that would have been forgotten had it been anyone but Y/N. But as I shook her hand and met those striking eyes for the first time, the fireworks blew in through the sky, like they were made for her.

Before I’d taken my next breath, I fucking knew she was the one I could spend the rest of my life looking for but never find again if I lost her; I couldn’t lose her again.

I knew the way I felt right now wasn’t meant for Bailey; I knew it from the second I asked her out. That’s what kept me awake at night, that’s what scared me and kept me from admitting this truth. Y/N seemed like that good, that perfect feelings while those fucking fireworks exploded.

READER

Shit, talk about an awkward car ride.

After the fireworks ended, we all parted ways with everyone and Noah walked me to his car. The atmosphere was fine at first, but being so close to him in this confined space made my palms sweat and core ache. Which didn’t make sense because earlier today while we laid in bed together, I didn’t feel this awkward tension. But now, it was as if we were drowning in it. I kept my gaze out the window as the familiar streets and houses came into view, telling me I was almost home. I frowned, not wanting the day to be over.

Noah noticed because he tapped my knee with a knuckle. “Everything alright?”

I gazed over to him and sucked in a breath at the sight of him. He pulled back the long locks of his hair in a low bun, a few strands falling into his face. The darkness of the car did nothing to hide his gorgeous features, his almond color eyes staring deep into my heart as he took his gaze off the road for a few beats. Before while we were at the pier, he had taken off his glasses but now Noah was wearing them and I loved the way he looked in them.

There was that word again; love. It held so much meaning now that I admitted it out loud to myself but yet, stung deep knowing he didn’t feel the same. Because if he did, he wouldn’t have been with someone else.

“Yeah,” I answered when I realized I hadn’t said anything yet. “I had a really fun day today, Noah. Thank you for everything.”

His fingers grazed over my knee to give it a squeeze. “Anytime, angel. I’m here to help you through whatever you need.”

Noah pulled the car into a stop in front of my house and I let out a sigh, not moving yet.

“Your new song was great by the way.”

My head snapped over towards him. “Oh, Eyelids? You, uh, you like it?”

“It was beautiful, angel. It seemed to have come from your heart,” Noah turned his body towards me in the driver's seat of the car.

“It did,” I licked my lips.

His hand glided over the steering wheel. “You added your voicemail.”

I titled my head towards him. “What?”

“The voicemail, I heard it, you added that.”

“I-,” the words faltered on my lips, not knowing how I would explain this one.

I called him one night in Japan but ended up leaving a voicemail, not knowing that my laptop was still recording from when I was messing with my vocals earlier. I was so apprehensive about putting it in a song but Chase thought it would be a great touch to Eyelids. So I did it, not even thinking Noah would catch on.

“I know, I already know,” Noah leaned closer towards me, closing the space inch by inch.

I swallowed thickly. “You do? I’m sorry if it-.”

“No need to apologize to me, angel,” Noah said.

“I really wanted you to-to-.”

“To what?” He raised a brow.

“Like it,” I admitted with a long breath.

“I do,” he nodded with a large smile. “I’m proud of you.”

Suddenly, his phone buzzed from its placement in the cup holder, my eyes reading the name with a pang in my heart.

Bailey.

Noah ignored it with a sigh and even though it was a flash image, I noticed what his background was; me, back from when we were on tour together. It was one where I was on stage singing, eyes closed with the stage lights casting me in a white light.

I couldn’t ask him about it because I was afraid of ruining the good energy we found ourselves in today.

Noah rubbed the back of his neck before turning up the volume of the radio, not even bothering to mention Bailey was calling him yet again today. “We actually have another song about to debut.”

I smacked his chest while sitting on my knees in the front seat, excitement filling the air. “Why didn’t you say anything?! I would have missed it.”

He chuckled. “It’s about to play any second.”

Just then the voice of the radio DJ came on through the speakers of Noah’s car. “Alright guys, we have a new single from Bad Omens. These guys are releasing hit after hit with Concrete Jungle, Nowhere to Go, and now, here is the Death of Peace of Mind.”

“I made another mistake, thought I could change. Thought I could make it out. Promises break, need to hear you say. You're gonna keep it now.”

“Oh fuck, Noah.” I gasped. “Your voice in this is fucking incredible.”

He gave me a small smile.

“I miss the way you say my name. The way you bend, the way you break. Your makeup running down your face. The way you touch, the way you taste. When the curtains call the time will we both go home alive? It wasn't hard to realize. Love's the death of peace of mind.”

My body stiffened as I blinked up at him, Noah’s eyes never leaving my face. Suddenly these lyrics were feeling almost too personal. The thickness of the tension becoming too much, the air around us shifting into something that we should have pushed away from, ignored it like we did everything else.

“You're in the walls that I made with crosses and frames hanging upside down. For granted, in vain, I took everything I ever cared about.”

Instead, I leaned closer towards Noah, who made no move to stop me.

“I miss the way you say my name. The way you bend, the way you break. Your makeup running down your face. The way you fuck, the way you taste.”

I sucked in a breath, eyes snapping up from his lips to his eyes. “Noah, is this-?”

All he did was nod, but that was enough for me as I crashed my lips to his, a shocked moan echoing over the music of the car. Immediately I climbed into his lap, his large hands enveloping around me.

“When the curtains call the time will we both go home alive?”

Even though it had been so long since we last kiss, our lips moved in sync as if we never missed a beat. He tasted exactly the same, his tongue felt exactly the same as it explored every inch of my mouth. I whined into him when I couldn’t completely straddle him, my hands resting against his chest.

“Back seat,” he muttered against my lips before grazing his teeth over them, patting my ass.

“It wasn't hard to realize. Love's the death of peace of mind. When the curtains call the time, will we both be satisfied?”

With an excited squeal, I jumped into the backseat of his car and watched as his long limbs tried to climb over the center console. Noah smacked his head on the roof of his car, cursing under his breath as he fell into the back seat next to me.

“Maybe you should get a bigger car,” I teased while straddling him once again.

Noah hummed while grasping my hips, digging his nails into the fabric of my jeans. “Only if you promise more of this.”

I pressed my lips to his once again, tongues immediately finding each other.

“It wasn't hard to realize. Love's the death of peace of mind. Love's the death of peace of mind.”

“Noah,” I moaned when his hips pressed into my core, the hardness of his cock brushing across it.

He pulled away breathless. “Fuck, angel. I missed the way you say my name.”

“You come and go in waves leaving me in your wake. You come and go in waves swallowing everything.”

I pulled away from him to look down at him, hearing those lyrics, and raised a brow. “Oh, I do?”

Noah let out a low growl, hand snaking in my hair as he yanked me back down to my lips and adjusted me so my aching core was pressed against his thigh. “Ride it.”

With. Fucking. Pleasure.

“Are you satisfied? Love's the death of peace of mind. Mind, mind.”

While I rubbed my pussy against his thigh, Noah moaned out a question between kissees.

“Are you-?”

Kiss.

“Mad I-?”

Kiss.

“Wrote a song-.”

“When the curtains call the time will we both go home alive?”

My fingers snapped away the tie that held his hair together and I watched with ecstasy as Noah’s hair fell to his shoulders in waves. I almost through about taking off his glasses but decided against it.

Our lips met again in a fiery kiss as he finished his question.

“About that night?”

I mumbled into his mouth. “No, now let me fucking cum, Noah.”

“It wasn't hard to realize. Love's the death of peace of mind.”

I moaned as my orgasm built higher and higher, almost to a crescendo.

“When the curtains call the time, will we both be satisfied?”

With one hand gripped snaked under my shirt, Noah’s fingers scratched and clawed at my skin, undoubtedly leaving marks, while his other smacked against the window to his left, fingers dragging down through the fog the heat of our kiss created.

Then his fingers left the skin of my back to graze up over my chest and I nearly came when I thought he was going to touch my breast but felt him twiddle my necklace between his fingers. Then gone was that hand from my chest to graze against the skin of my left wrist, now twiddling the bracelet between his fingers.

“You’re wearing them.” His lips attacked my neck is viscous bites.

I leaned my head back to give him more access when my hips moved in faster, uneven pace, as my orgasm was so fucking close to exploding through me; I could almost taste it.

“I found them,” I said breathless. “They’re my favorite gift I’ve ever gotten.”

“It wasn't hard to realize. Love's the death of peace of mind. Love's the death of peace of mind. Love's the death of peace of mind.”

When the song faded out, Noah reached for the button of my jeans. “Let me help you, angel.”

Suddenly, loud ringing echoed through the speakers of the car, which made me pull away from Noah.

“Incoming call from Bailey. Anwer?” Siri’s voice said.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

Suddenly the lust haze that has enveloped both of us faded, realization seeping deep into my bones. This was so wrong, so fucking wrong.

“Shit! Shit! Shit! Oh my god, I am so so sorry! I’m so-,” I apologized.

Noah realized what was happening, so he tried to reach for my face. “Hey, it’s okay. It’s okay.”

I hastily jumped off his lap, fingers going to my kiss-swollen lips, as I took in the sight of him. His long hair a mess thanks to my hands gripping and his own lips were bruised from the force of our kiss; his phone still ringing.

Tears burned in my eyes as I smoothed my hair down and reached for my bag in the front seat.

“You should answer that,” my hand gripped the door handle. “She’s been trying to call you for hours.”

“Angel-.”

“It’s fine, Noah.” I blew out a shaky breath.

“She knows where I’m at, with my friends,” he explained before answering the call with a sigh.

My face physically twitched at his words. They stung like a fucking scorpion tail but I had no one else to blame but myself.

Friends? Is that what you call what just happened?

“Hi babe!” Bailey’s cheery voice dragged the knife deeper into my chest. “I’ve been trying to call you all day. “

Noah adjusted himself in the backseat next to me and for the first time I took in the sight of his cock pressing against his jeans but did my best not to let a moan slip.

“Can I call you back?” Noah asked.

“It’s fine,” I mouthed. “I’m going to go.”

He shook his head, trying to stop me as I opened the door, the cool night air brushing against my heated skin.

“So are you still planning on coming over tonight?” Bailey questioned just before I slammed the door shut, ignoring the hurt look that crossed over Noah’s face.

As the tears fell from my eyes, I didn’t bother looking back to his car, knowing if I did, I might not make it inside.

#noah sebastian #noah sebastian and reader #noah sebastian x reader #noah sebastian reader insert #noah sebastian smut #enemies to lovers #right person wrong time #starcrossed lovers

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milo-manheim-luver · 10 months

Text

The Night We Met- Rafe Cameron x Fem!Reader

summary: rafe thinks you two met at a party years ago, but finds out you two had actually met a year before that. but why can’t he remember? and what happened that night?

warnings: major drug use, drug overdose, angst, mentions of alcohol, fluff, ooc rafe, suggestive content and defs cringy at the end lol. also might be a bit short? idek.

a/n: DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE NOT COMFORTABLE WITH THE WARNINGS ABOVE don’t know how i feel about the ending but i’m gonna yolo it. thought of this idea/concept when i was listening to the song below:

“you know, i’m so fucking happy you said ‘yes’. i honestly don’t know what i would’ve done if you hadn’t” rafe spoke as he held Y/N in his arms, curled up in the bed at his father’s house in the bahamas. one arm wrapped around the young woman’s back as the other gripped her bare thigh against his hip. the young woman’s hand drew imaginary shapes against his chest before looking up into his deep blue eyes.

“i could never say the word ‘no’ to you my love. never. i’m yours. forever and always. you’re the best thing that’s happened to me and i’m so happy i’m finally a cameron” Y/N face cracked into a wide smile, as she continued to gaze into rafe’s eyes, as he broke into a rare, genuine smile. the two had just gotten married the night before, and were now just relaxing in the privacy of rafe’s, father’s home in the bahamas.

“im so happy we met. truly, i am. i love you baby” rafe whispered down to his newly wedded wife, moving his hand from holding her bare thigh, to push back a piece of her hair from her face, as he planted a gentle, but passionate kiss to her plump lips.

“i love you too hunny” she whispered as their lips detached from one another’s. “d-do you remember the night we met?” Y/N continued, swallowing the lump in her throat. she knew she’d have to tell him her secret eventually, and now seemed like the perfect time as they were about to spend the rest of their lives together.

“uh yeah… i think so? pretty sure it was that banger of a party top was having my senior year of high school. you had come to the party with sarah. you guys had only been friends for about a year or two by then? i couldn’t stop looking at you” rafe chuckled at the memory as he continued. “i got you on my team as we played beer pong… and we killed it. everyone else we went up against sucked so bad” rafe continued to hold her in his arms, looking down to admire the woman he’d just gotten so lucky to marry.

“uh… r-rafe um m-my love. c-can i tell you something?” Y/N stuttered out to rafe. she was so scared to tell him how wrong he was, but she knew it had to be done.

“babe, you know you can tell me anything. what is it?” rafe questioned, as his hand on her bare thigh, began to rub soothing circles into her soft skin.

“that’s not the night we met… um… do you remember that story you told me about your overdose incident you had when you were only seventeen?” Y/N whispered out, not wanting to upset rafe by bringing up a hard time from his past that he was never proud of.

“uh, yeah. i do. that night is kinda a blur still to this day. all i remember is doing a few too many lines and waking up in the kildare island hospital two days later. doctors said if whoever had made the call, called five minutes later i’d be dead. why?” he spoke softly, as he replayed the memories in his brain. he’s hurt so many people during that period of time. he wished he’d never even started doing the drug, but at the time he felt as if that was the only thing that could save him from himself.

the young woman began to shake involuntary, getting her lovers attention, “babe why are you shaking? did i go too hard earlier?” he chuckled out lightheartedly, trying to lighten her mood.

“i’m shaking because i feel bad for keeping something from you. and yeah you did go hard, but i’m not complaining…. but that’s besides the point. please hear me out and don’t get mad. i only did it to protect you” she rambled on as rafe’s facial expression changed from a smile, to a stone-cold look, going completely serious.

she took his silence and stare as a sign to continue on what she had been keeping from him for the last 5 years. “that night you overdosed, i had come over to tannyhill to talk to sarah about something a-and when i got there…. there was nobody home… u-until i walked past your room a-and you were just pacing back and forth like some crazy guy” Y/N sniffled out as she moved her hand from drawing imaginary shapes from rafe’s chest, to cradle his left cheek as she spoke.

Y/N had just arrived to tannyhill, as her and sarah had to start working on a school project soon. but as soon as she arrived to the house, it was completely empty. she was always welcomed in, even when nobody was home. rose and ward had adored her as soon as they’d met her six months before tonight. it also helped that Y/N family were close business partners with ward as well.

as soon as Y/N walked up the spiral staircase, calling out sarah’s name, to see if she was home, she rounded the corner trying to find sarah. instead of sarah, however she found sarah’s brother, pacing his room back and forth, mumbling words to himself. he’d seemed to be twitching, and almost shaking as he was pacing, alarming Y/N a small amount. she’s decided to step into his doorway to see if he was okay.

rafe’s eyes softened as his girl spoke of what really happened that night he’d almost died, nodding his head in her hand, signaling her to continue. “i approached you babe, and you started getting all paranoid, you were yelling at me, which i guess wasn’t that abnormal for you at the time from what i’d heard from others. you started marching over to me as you continued to yell, i think you were going to push me, but i don’t know, but then you just fell to the ground and started dry heaving involuntarily, as your breathing became unsteady. it scared me…. i’d never seen anyone like that before. b-but then y-you turned all pale and completely passed out. i-i didn’t know what to do so i ran over to you to see what happened” Y/N started to whimper, as a single tear fell from her tear duct, and rolled down her soft cheek.

“hey, rafe, right? it’s Y/N, sarah’s friend. are you okay? you don’t look too good” Y/N asked politely to the young teenage boy, who stopped his pacing to look up at the girl.

“who the hell are you? what are you doing in my house? huh?” the young man yelled, as he began to walk up towards the girl, ready to shove her out of his room, but before he could get close enough, he hunched over, involuntarily dry heaving, as his breathing became more rapid, drawing even more red flags in the young teenage girls brain.

his face started to turn as white as a ghost, before he ultimately lost consciousness completely, falling limp onto his bedroom floor. Y/N immediately ran over the boys sides to see what she could do.

rafe’s eyes began to water, as he stared down at Y/N, seeing her slowly crack and break down into his arms. something he had dwelled forever; seeing his lover heartbroken and distraught. he’d never wanted to see her this way. it ached him to see her this way, and to know he was the cause made it 10x worse. “b-baby, continue…. finish the story. i can take it” rafe’s voice cracked as he urged his lover to tell the rest of the story. he was in shambles at the moment, tears welling up in his eyes as they started to pour out one by one.

“as soon as i’d ran over to your body, i picked your head up, trying to talk to you. i was just trying to figure out what you had taken. but then i’d remembered hearing from sarah before that you’d been doing a lot of cocaine, but in all seriousness i don’t think anyone noticed how bad your addiction really was.” Y/N whispered out, as she relived that night in her head one more time. she soon continued, “i was trying to find a pulse as i still held your head in my arms. i could barely hear it, and your skin was on fire. i’d just assumed it was a drug overdose, s-so i called 9-1-1”

the young teenage girl cradled the young drug addict’s head in her arms carefully, immediately feeling the extreme heat radiating from his skin, alarming the girl further. why was he on fire? and why did he completely pass out? Y/N soon came to realization what was possibly happening as soon as she remembered the conversation her and sarah were having the week before. sarah had been complaining to Y/N about her brother’s ‘slight’ drug problem. the drug of his choice however had been cocaine. sarah was always telling her how everytime he’d do a line or two, he’d get extremely paranoid and more aggressive than normal.

“rafe, wake up” the worried girl cried out to the passed out boy. “rafe, what did you take? how much did you take?!” she cried out again, but no answer to avail. she huffed and puffed as she started to cry, trying to find a pulse. she could barely hear his heartbeat through his carotid artery. she could not be responsible for his possible drug overdose. she would not. so, Y/N grabbed her phone from her back pocket of her jeans, and dialed 9-1-1.

“9-1-1, what’s your emergency?” the older lady spoke through the phone.

“hi, um i need an ambulance to the Cameron estate at tannyhill immediately! there’s a possible cocaine drug overdose! please come quick! i-i don’t know how much longer h-he will keep breathing” Y/N weeped into her phone, as she tried to keep her cool.

“ma’am, i need you to calm down. what’s your name?” the older lady asked through the phone to the young distraught girl.

“y-Y/N. what’s yours?” Y/N asked the lady.

“my name is susannah. Y/N i need you to tell me if they’re still breathing.” susannah spoke calmly to the young girl.

“u-uh yeah, it’s super faint though. is he gonna die?!” Y/N started sobbing as she continued to cradle rafe’s head.

“Y/N… do you know what possible drug they could’ve overdosed on? and do you know how much they took? their height or weight?”

“h-he does cocaine i believe. or at least that’s what i’ve been told. he’s uh maybe 6’2ish? i’m not sure. i-i don’t know how much he did though. i-i’m not sure how much he weighs but i do know that hes more of a muscular build if that helps” Y/N stuttered out to susannah, the 9-1-1 dispatcher.

“okay, Y/N stay with me. take deep breaths. help is on the way” susannah continued to speak to Y/N.

“y-you we-were the one who called the a-ambulance?” rafe croaked out to Y/N as he finally cracked. he was a mess. tears streaming down his cheeks as he tried to hold in his sobs, but no longer could. he was so tired of fighting to not show any emotion, so he didn’t fight it anymore. he continued through his sobs, “y-you were m-my savior t-that night?” the young man was wrapping his head around the realization that his newly wedded wife was the angel that saved his life all those years ago when he almost ended it after taking too much of the white drug.

Y/N just softly nodded her head, “i was baby… i was. i know i should’ve told you sooner. but i didn’t, i-i wanted to protect you from knowing the full truth because i know you’re gonna beat yourself up over it. that’s how you are; you will get so mad at yourself for something you’ve done that you slowly start to hurt yourself. i can’t let that happen to you baby” Y/N engulfed him into a hug, as her arms cradled his head into her chest as he wept.

“as soon as the ambulance got there, the cops also arrived. i gave my statement and since i was under eighteen, for legal reasons, they never put my name in that statement. that’s why you never knew and why they never told you. my love…. d-don’t be mad please.” the young woman stuttered out, scared her new husband was mad at her.

rafe lifted his head from her chest, sniffling, “i-i could never be mad at you baby…. never. i-i wanna tell you w-what the doctors told m-my dad and i… can i tell you?” Y/N wiped away rafe’s tears that continuously leaked from his eyes, as she nodded in response, wanting to know everything he knew.

it took rafe a moment to compose himself then began, “when i woke up two days later, obviously i told you that the doctor said that if whoever hadn’t called when they did or even 5 minutes later i’d be dead. i never told you why that was”

“what do you mean my love?” Y/N softly spoke as she looked into rafe’s deep blue eyes, with a look of worry in her own eyes to know the truth.

“i mean… the cocaine i took that night had been laced with small amounts of fentanyl which is why i lost complete consciousness and almost stopped breathing. they had to give me three doses of NARCAN and wait for the best. my dad made sure to keep that part secret, because having all of his business partners know about my cocaine problem was bad enough. he didn’t want anyone to know i’d accidentally done fentanyl as well.” rafe sighed as he remembered the look on his father’s face when he woke up: pure disappointment.

“really rafe? really? cocaine overdose? laced with fentanyl?! how do you think that’s going to make the family look? huh? i’m going to have to pay people off from telling others. this cannot get out” ward went on to his son about how he’d screwed up. it’d only been a day since rafe had woken up from his small coma and ward was already being insensitive to the teenage boys drug problem.

“d-dad i’m sorry. i didn’t know how else to cope with my feelings. it was the only escape i had from feeling like shit. w-when i take it, i feel-i feel almost happy” rafe tried to explain to his father, who in return just scoffed harshly.

“rafe… you need to get your shit together. i’m so sick of you coming up with all these excuses. you keep this shit up and you’re out of the house. got it?” ward sneered back to his only son, who only cowered his head down and nodded in return.

“rafe… you never told me that. why?” Y/N asked sweetly as she continued to gaze into rafe’s blue eyes.

“i’m not proud of that moment in my life. i was embarrassed for so many years. my father paid off people from telling others. he was so disappointed in me. you should’ve seen the look in his eyes the day after i woke up.” rafe sighed softly as he spoke.

“hunny, i’m sorry you went through that. never feel embarrassed about your struggles. i hope you know that no matter what, i will always love you. i will never be disappointed in you. i know that’s different coming from me and not him, but just remember i’ll always be by your side” Y/N thought thoroughly as she spoke every word with love.

“after the overdose incident… and seeing how scared my sisters were, and rose, i wanted so badly to get clean but i couldn’t go to rehab because then word would get out and it’d ruin my father’s deals and business. so i had to do it myself. it took awhile… and it was hard. but i eventually did it. after meeting you, well, from when i thought we met for the first time, you gave me strength to stay clean even when i had the urges” rafe smiled through more tears as he looked down at his wife.

“my love, i’m so proud of you. nothing you went through was easy. i hope you know that. and i hope you know i love you so much and if you ever feel like you have an urge you tell me. got it?” she spoke softly as she still caressed his cheeks looking into his eyes and to his lips.

rafe leaned down, planting his lips onto Y/N, kissing them repeatedly, as did she, and planting one last kiss that was full of love and passion, then pulled away.

“i love you baby. you’re my everything. i promise to come to you if i ever need anything or have an urge. i promise to not hurt you like i did to others i love in the past. i won’t put you through all the shit i put everyone else through all those years ago” rafe smiled again down at Y/N.

“i love you too with all my heart. now prove your love mr cameron” Y/N smirked up at rafe as he chuckled loudly.

“your wish is my command… but are you up for it?” he raised an eyebrow in question with a smirk planted on his face.

“i think i’ve rested enough… just give it to me” she smirked as rafe leaned down placing his lips onto hers harshly, pulling away once more.

“got it mrs cameron. got it. i’m gonna give it to you now” he smirked as he flipped the two over so he was hovering over her again.

“love you” she smiled as there noses briskly touched.

“love you too, my savior. now how about some kids?”

tag list:

@slut4drudy @runningfrom2am @maybankslover

#Spotify #drew starkey #drew starkey x reader #rafe cameron #drew starkey fluff #rafe cameron x reader #rafe outer banks #drew starkey x y/n #outer banks #drew starkey fic #rafe x reader #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe cameron x reader angst #rafe cameron angst #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron x female reader

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yelena-bellova · 1 year

Text

Twenty Years Later: Joel Miller x F!Reader - Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Seventeen: Twenty Years Later

Plot: In the middle of the night, Y/n and Joel contemplate their future in Jackson.

Word Count: 4.2k

Warnings: language, reference to violence, death, blood, guns, loss of a child (16+)

A/N: And here we are…the last chapter. I have a little farewell note posted at the bottom of this, and I hope y’all read it. Until then, enjoy this last bit of Joel and Rosebud’s story 💞

—————

Life in the apocalypse was noisy. Between public executions, FEDRA vehicles, work shifts, fights breaking out…Cordyceps was intended to silence the planet, but it had only made it louder.

Y/n was contemplating the silence of Jackson, holding a steaming mug of tea, sitting at the dining room table. Her dining room table. In her house. The house she now shared with Ellie and Joel. It would take a long time to get used to thinking of anything other than a backpack and whatever they were wearing as theirs…

They’d arrived at Jackson’s gates just before sunset, the guards escorted them in after having the dogs check them for infection. By the end of their hike, Joel was practically carrying Y/n, and the last bit of her strength drained as they got into town. Tommy, thankfully, had been working nearby and helped Joel and Ellie get her back to the house. Y/n had fallen asleep the moment her body was laid across the familiar bed, and she’d slept straight through the evening hours.

Until she couldn’t.

Y/n had woken up in the middle of the night with Joel snoring lightly, his arm draped over her hips. He smelled the best he had in months, the usual layer of dirt and grime missing from his skin. Any other time, Y/n could have stayed there happily and listened to him breathe, but her mind was restless and she felt suffocated by the sheets.

Naturally, when Joel stirred and found himself cuddling nothing but air, he was wide awake.

The staircase creaked and drew Y/n’s eyes up from her cup, Joel came through the kitchen seconds later. Dressed in sweatpants, a grey t-shirt, and with his hair mussy from rubbing against his pillow, Y/n drank in the sight much as she was her tea; slowly, letting the comforting warmth ease her into memories of simpler times.

“Couldn’t sleep?” Joel asked, his voice gravelly with exhaustion.

“Wonder why,” Y/n replied, looking back down at her mug.

Joel padded over to the dining table, pulling out the seat across from Y/n. There was a visible duality to her, tranquility in her posture, her movements, her voice…and yet, a two-ton burden on her back.

“Do you know what this is?” Y/n asked, warming both her palms on her mug.

Joel knew she wasn’t actually searching for any answer and stayed silent.

“Tea,” Y/n continued, “With herbs they grow here. And I boiled it with water,” she tilted her head back towards the kitchen counter, “Hot water.”

Joel chuckled, “Yeah, that’s gonna take some gettin’ used to.”

“I couldn’t tell you the last time I had tea,” Y/n shook her head, “Ten…fifteen years ago?”

“Maybe we work on coffee next,” Joel suggested with a smile.

“Oh, in the interest of preserving your temperament, I think it’s necessary,” Y/n smiled back, taking a sip of her beverage.

Joel knew they were dancing around whatever was weighing on her. They’d done enough intricate footwork around their own landmines the last three months.

“What’re you thinkin’ about?” Joel finally asked.

Y/n’s eyes were locked on Joel’s side, but she wasn’t actually registering what her gaze was focused on. A crack in the floor or a chip in the wall paint…something that was enough nothing to allow her thoughts the space they needed.

“That look,” she answered, her eyes finally flicking to Joel’s, “Joel, that look.”

Joel sighed, he didn’t need any more words to know what she was referring to.

“How are we going to do this?” Y/n asked, lowering her voice as if Ellie was in the room and not sleeping soundly upstairs. She’d poked her head through the girl’s bedroom door to confirm before slipping downstairs.

“We just do it,” Joel answered, shrugging a hand and letting it drop back to his lap.

“We just lie to her? For the rest of her life?” Y/n asked again, “Joel, there’s no way she doesn’t already know.”

They had their separate trepidations about the charade they would put on for Ellie. But Joel had constructed the lie, Y/n was simply trying to read from the story he’d written.

“I just…” Y/n shut her eyes and drew a breath that walked the line between trembling and steady, “I keep thinking about it, a-all…everything we did and I…”

Joel was unsettled by the hesitation in Y/n’s tone, “Are you sayin’ you regret it?”

Y/n’s eyes flew open, “No. Never,” she said firmly, “Ever, will I regret that. I just…it’s all so jumbled in my head.”

That was one aspect of what had happened at the hospital that Joel hadn’t thought to consider. He’d never been for the Fireflies, saving Ellie had just been one more act of rebellion against them. But Y/n had been betrayed by the people she trusted with her life, and in turn, trusted her with theirs. Rescuing Ellie had been her own act of betrayal.

Joel reached across the table and encircled her wrist, his fingers lightly massaging her pulse.

“I gave everything,” Y/n said softly, “I worked so hard for Marlene to trust me, and she only ever saw me as something to manipulate. I walked Ellie across the country, risked all of our lives when the whole time, I was just marching her to her death for a cure,” she pointed towards the front of the house as if the Fireflies were waiting in their living room, “That we had no guarantee would even work.”

Joel listened, absorbing the vague details of the years she’d spent apart from him.

“And now,” Y/n bit down on her lip, “Now we have to pretend like everything’s fine. Like we didn’t do what we did, like we’re telling the truth, until she figures it out.”

“C’mon, she’s n-“

“She’s smart, Joel,” Y/n argued, confronting his denial, “She can see right through us. And one day,” Y/n fought back the tears that wanted to speak for her, “We’ll lose her.”

Behind actually losing Ellie and Y/n to death, losing them to his own sins was his greatest fear. He was right beside her in the knowledge that if Ellie discovered the truth of what had happened in Salt Lake, she’d never forgive either of them. It made him want to lie all the more convincingly to keep it from happening.

Joel reached across the table, taking the mug from Y/n and setting it next to her. He held both her hands in his, gripping them tightly to drive his point home.

“We are going to tell her what we need to,” he said, his tone soft but the words were spoken with strength, “Otherwise we tell her exactly what you just said. That she would’ve been killed for something that wasn’t even guaranteed.”

Y/n swallowed, thinking over the two options. The second one worsened the ache in her stomach, the pain of Marlene’s deceit was still fresh.

“And we give her a life here,” Joel continued, “Where she can be with kids her age, go to school…be fuckin’ normal.”

The truth of it was, even if there had been a 100% guarantee that Ellie’s death would ensure a Cordyceps cure, Y/n and Joel still would have saved her. Because, whether they could admit it out loud or not, she was their kid. They hadn’t conceived her, they hadn’t known her for the first fourteen years of her life, but she was theirs in every sense of the word. And there was no length a parent wouldn’t go to for their child.

“Normal,” Y/n repeated, her lips quirking upwards.

“I know,” Joel chuckled under his breath, “Relative term.”

They shared a smile and Y/n took the opportunity to admire how the low glow of the nearby lamp softened Joel’s entire face. His wrinkles and frown lines didn’t seem so deep, the darkness of his eyes strayed from intimidating and became inviting.

“We give her what she deserves,” Joel finished, rubbing his thumbs over the backs of Y/n’s hands, “Happiness.”

Happiness. The feeling had eluded them both for so long. They’d found some form of it in the small moments, in the few people they’d met throughout the pandemic, but it had never felt true. Perhaps because they’d kept distance between themselves and any possible source of joy, or perhaps because they’d thought true happiness couldn’t survive in a world like theirs. But regardless of their attempts or assumptions, Joel, Ellie and Y/n had a real shot at it now. They could stay happy for as long as they wanted.

Y/n eyed her backpack that was sitting on the chair at the furthest end of the table. Happiness was tied up in the last secret she was keeping from Joel.

Joel was confused as Y/n let go of his hands and stood up, bracing herself on the table as she rose with a grunt. The fight against the Fireflies, plus her stunt with the epinephrine, would cost her weeks more of healing.

He watched as she scooted the chair away so her body blocked it from his view. She unzipped it, reached in and pulled something out Joel wasn’t allowed to see yet.

Y/n inhaled and turned around, holding the object up for display.

Joel’s breath caught in his chest.

It was the butterfly cling that had hung in his window back in Boston.

“I figured when I took it, I’d be in for a screaming match eventually,” Y/n said with the smallest of smiles, she couldn’t have been further from the truth.

Joel had meant it when he said that Ellie and Y/n had healed him. They had brought back the pieces of him that he’d tried to amputate long ago. But the watch would still never leave his wrist, his eyes would forever catch on people that bore any resemblance to his daughter. He would never be fully ready to live without Sarah’s memory.

Y/n had stolen the decoration from Joel’s apartment in a moment of pure emotion. She hadn’t taken her chance to retrieve any of Sarah’s posessions from the Miller’s house, and she’d regretted it for twenty years. She had nothing to remind her of her daughter, and she needed to physically hold some piece of her. The butterfly, such a prominent part of Sarah’s personality, represented all that had been lost, but the beauty that was retained in remembering the sweet girl.

Joel’s chair scraped against the floor as he rose to his feet, coming to stand in front of Y/n. He ran his hand over the decoration, his throat clogging a little both from sentiment and understanding why Y/n had hid it from him. The worst version of him had tried to steal her memories of Sarah so long ago, and he was so grateful that she hadn’t let him.

“Where were you, uh,” Joel trailed off, trying to compose himself, “Where were you thinkin’ for it?”

“Kitchen window, maybe,” Y/n considered, “All that sunlight that’ll come through?”

Unable to take his eyes off the butterfly, Joel just nodded along. Y/n ran a hand over his bicep, steering the two of them towards the kitchen. They stopped at the sink, Joel pushed back the faded curtains and they saw the full possibility of the view. Sunbeams would shine through the glass pane, illuminating the butterfly’s indigo blue all around the room.

Y/n untangled the chain and took hold of the cling, reaching up and sticking it to the center of the window. She stood back, Joel’s chest waiting for her to lean back into, and the two of them rested in the quiet. Healing and misery were intertwined in the moment. The hole left in their hearts by Sarah’s death would remain, but instead of living despite her death, this felt like the beginning of living for her memory. In their everyday moments, cooking breakfast, washing dishes…Sarah could be with them.

Y/n rotated in Joel’s arms, reaching down to take both his hands.

“There’s only one way I’m doing all of this with you, Miller,” she said, referencing everything from lying to Ellie to sleeping in the same bed.

“Hmm?” Joel hummed.

Y/n sighed and smiled easily, if they were reclaiming all that they’d lost, they were reclaiming all of it.

She led Joel back across the room, returning to the table and reaching into her backpack for her flashlight before pulling them towards the front door. She let go of Joel’s hand only long enough to put her jacket on and for him to do the same.

“Where are we-” Joel started to ask as Y/n unlocked the door.

“Just…“ Y/n tugged him toward the front porch, eager to let her actions speak for her.

Joel shut the door behind them and followed her down the porch steps. The snow had returned and there was a light fall beginning to accentuate the edges of the house. Y/n turned on her flashlight and shined it in front of them, leading them out of their neighborhood and towards the center of town.

“You should be takin’ it slower,” Joel reprimanded lightly, worried that Y/n’s ribs stood to get worse.

Every step caused an ache in her abdomen, but Y/n’s steps refused to falter. She was on a mission.

She led them through town, the strands of lights from building to building helping to light the path to their destination. Through her memories, she tried to pick out specific pieces of the tour Maria had given them weeks ago, searching out one building in particular.

“I think this is it…” Y/n muttered under her breath, dragging Joel up the steps to peer through the windows, “Yeah, this is it.”

“What’s it?” Joel asked, completely lost and freezing cold.

Y/n made an educated guess that security weren’t a major concern within Jackson’s walls and tried the door. It opened immediately for her.

“Y/n, what’re we-“

“Come on,” Y/n tugged Joel through the door, using the flashlight to light their way inside the building.

Joel couldn’t see more than two feet ahead of them, but despite his confusion, he trusted whatever Y/n was up to. She walked them deeper inside, eventually shining her flashlight upwards of their path on an alter.

They were inside Jackson’s church.

Joel’s heart stopped counting time for one beat, he knew exactly what she was doing.

“Okay,” Y/n exhaled, putting her hands on both of Joel’s arms and inching him closer to the alter, “I think you’re supposed to be here…”

Joel watched her in a daze, pliant as clay in her palms.

“And then I…” Y/n looked back down the way they’d come, “Hang on.”

Y/n hurried back down the alter steps, taking small hastened steps down the aisle to get back to the grand wooden doors. Her empty hand hung in the air as she looked around for something, anything to hold, till she realized if this was going to be imperfect…it needed to be totally imperfect.

She held the flashlight under her chest in both hands, the glow illuminating her face.

Joel watched her from the alter and laughed.

“Ba-dum, ba-dum,” Y/n began to sing the familiar march, taking as theatrical of steps as her ribs would allow her.

“Y’know, I never envisioned you walking down the aisle to that song,” Joel smiled, allowing himself to fall into the fantasy of the moment.

“Oh, really, what did you envision?” Y/n asked, slowing her steps.

Joel shook his head, breathless and beaming, “I don’t think I care any more.”

Y/n tried to contain her grin, failing miserably as she continued the stroll that was fighting to become a sprint.

Eventually, she made it to the alter, her eyes never leaving Joel’s as she climbed the three steps and came to stand across from him. Y/n set the flashlight in the space between them, letting the light shine upwards to the ceiling.

Joel reached out and took her hands into his, his cheeks practically splitting from how hard he was trying to hold his smile back. “Don’t we need witnesses?”

“Mm-hm,” Y/n hummed, “And we’ll do it all over again with Tommy and Ellie and Maria…this is just for us.”

Even if they’d had the whole nine yards, Y/n in a flowing white gown and Joel in a tuxedo, roses and candles and music…neither one of them could have imagined a more perfect moment than the one they had.

“Okay,” Y/n cleared her throat and adjusted her grip on Joel’s hands, “Dearly beloved…”

“Oh, shit,” Joel couldn’t help but laugh at the formality.

“If we’re doin’ this, we’re doin’ it right,” Y/n laughed with him, “Dearly beloved. We are gathered here today, at the end of the world, to bring together this man and this woman in holy matrimony…without an ordained minister, or a license.”

Joel dropped his head and snorted.

“In this day and age, marriage sounds pointless,” Y/n continued her speech as if she were the preacher, “But I think it’s more necessary than ever. Because at the end of the day, everyone needs something to cling to. Some hope to hold onto when everything feels hopeless…” Y/n shakily inhaled, “Something to fight for.”

Joel was already on the verge of tears and he hadn’t even spoken yet.

Y/n exhaled and tried to collect her thoughts, “I think we do the vows next…want me to go first?”

“No,” Joel whispered, “I’ll go.”

Y/n nodded and held onto Joel a little tighter, trying to steady them both.

There were a million things Joel could have said, and twenty years ago, he’d imagined saying to Y/n. How much he loved her, how excited he was for their future, his dreams for them and Sarah and the babies they’d have…he never thought he’d use his wedding vows to apologize.

“The day I lost you…was one of the darkest days of my life,” he began, speaking with a surprising strength, “And at some point, when I realized how wrong I was…I had to make peace with knowing I’d never see you again. With the idea that you might have…” Joel trailed off, unable to finish the gruesome thought, “And I thought I had, but…the second I saw you again, I realized I hadn’t put you away. Not for a minute. How could I?”

Y/n sniffled, wanting to wipe the building tears away but unable to let go of Joel for even half a second.

“I will spend the rest of my life,” Joel’s voice closed up, trying to swallow the lump of sorrow in his throat, “Knowing I can never make up for what I did…but I will do everything and anything I can to make you happy.”

Joel had sat on so many words for so long, but there was one thing he needed to make sure she knew.

“Then and now,” Joel confessed, caressing her with sentiment, “You’re my…everything.” he paused, a few uncontrollable tears escaping his eyes, “And you were the best mom to our daughter.”

Y/n closed her eyes, two tears falling down her cheeks. She hadn’t realized how badly she’d needed to hear Joel call her what they both knew she was.

“And I love you,” he promised, “And I’m never lettin’ you go again. Ever.”

Joel sniffled and wiped his eyes on his jacket sleeve, “Your turn.”

Y/n chuckled, blinking away the rest of her tears to attempt half of what Joel had.

“I know that everything’s different now,” Y/n began, “That we’re different people than we were when we met. But when I look at you,” she huffed a breath, allowing herself to be taken by the depth of Joel’s eyes, “I still see the same man I fell in love with twenty years ago. The one who only gets out of bed in the morning for his coffee and sleeps with the fan on and won’t let anybody take care of him.”

Joel chuckled, fiddling with Y/n’s hands.

“But I see this man too,” she continued, pulling one inch closer to Joel, “The one who I’ve spent the last three months trying not to fall back in love with only to find out…I never fell out of it.”

Y/n was confronting her fears from three months before and Joel’s ever-present one; that his sins were insurmountable and she’d forever be afraid of the darkest parts of him.

“I want you,” Y/n said with unmistakable sureness, “All of you. Every part. The good, the bad, and what you’ll never ever show anyone. Because even with all of this,” Y/n gestured around them, “All the blood and the sickness and what we’ve all done to survive…you’re still you. You’re still my Joel.”

Joel was certain that whatever was left of him died with Sarah, having Y/n there to look into his soul and see the true him was a gift he wasn’t sure he’d ever be worthy of.

“We missed twenty years together. We can’t change that,” Y/n shook her head, speaking quickly before Joel could begin to guilt himself, “But we can love each other with everything we have for however long we have left. And I promise you,” she squeezed their hands, “That there won’t be a single minute of a single day where I won’t love you with my whole heart.”

With everything Joel had in him, he wanted to pull Y/n into his body and kiss for everything she was worth. But in keeping with the show they were putting on, he restrained himself.

“We don’t have rings,” Joel whispered with a smile.

“No,” Y/n sniffled and laughed, “I figured we work on those tomorrow.”

“Okay,” Joel nodded, “Isn’t there somethin’ else? Somethin’ we’re supposed to recite?”

“Yeah, let’s see if I remember any of it,” Y/n chuckled, “Do you, Joel Miller, take this woman to be your not-quite-lawfully wedded wife-“

Joel couldn’t stop himself from laughing once more at the complete invalidity of what they were doing.

“In sickness and in health,” Y/n raised an eyebrow, “For richer or poorer, if either of those apply to communism, for better or worse ‘til death do us part?”

Joel refused to listen to the last five words, he wanted the very moment they were living to stretch on forever. And in a way, it could. They were safe, finally, and they could spend the rest of their lives growing old together. Joel’s long fight was over, his only job now was to love and cherish Ellie and Y/n.

“I do,” he grinned, matching Y/n’s, “And do you, Y/n Y/l/n, take this old man-“

Y/n snorted and shook her head at Joel.

“To be your not-at-all-lawfully wedded husband,” he continued, “In sickness and health and bad knees, for richer or poorer,” Joel drew strength from his next breath, “Even though we’re communists…for better or worse, ‘til death do us part?”

In Y/n’s mind, she saw a supercut of moments throughout her time with Joel that had stood the test of time. Meeting him in a downtown bar, dancing with him on their first date, their first kiss on the ferris wheel, countless nights at home with him and Sarah, holding her in his arms just a few hours before their lives had ended…except they hadn’t ended. They had always been on the road back to one another, even if they hadn’t known it. Despite the trials they’d faced, fate had always been waiting for them at an alter.

“I do,” Y/n whispered through her tears.

Even though the whole thing had been Y/n’s idea, Joel was still relieved by her answer. It was the final piece of forgiveness that he felt he still needed to earn from her.

“Do I get to kiss you now?” Joel asked, his hands nearly twitching with how badly he wanted to reach for Y/n.

“Not yet,” she laughed, “By the power vested in me and my impatience, I now pronounce us man and wife. You may kiss your-“

Joel was on her before she could finish her monologue, wrapping one arm around her waist and cupping her cheek in his palm as he pressed his lips to hers. Y/n both smiled and cried into the kiss, overwhelmed not only by the man she loved, but by the relief she felt. Marrying Joel was the healing of the wound she’d nursed for two decades, because it secured their future. It didn’t look just how they wanted it, but they had one. They never ever had to be apart from one another again. For the first time in a long time, Y/n’s mind, her body and her heart were completely at ease.

Joel had never been a believer in everything happening for a reason, but as he kissed his wife, his wife, he knew that he was sorely in the wrong. Every step he’d taken since walking away from her, from Austin to Boston, had been a step in the journey back to her. To her life-giving lips, her tender embrace, her fierce devotion and to the fullness of her love…to his Rosebud.

They stood as one at the alter, pouring everything they’d ever felt and ever would feel for one another into their kiss. Each brush of their lips and touch of skin took them back in time, transforming them to some hybrid of their current and younger selves. From meeting on an ordinary May evening and falling in love over a hot Austin summer, to losing one another and reuniting in a blood soaked hall with pistols aimed at one another. From saving one another’s lives throughout their trek and all the reluctantly tender moments they’d shared along the way, to finally losing the battle with their long buried feelings and sealing their fate to save their daughter, Y/n and Joel could have sworn it all happened yesterday.

Give or take twenty years.

————

A/N: Wow…I don’t know where to begin.

I wrote the first chapter as a one-shot and asked if anyone would be interested in me expanding to a series. The name Rosebud didn’t exist, there were no theories to be created, and all I had was a poorly constructed idea of Joel Miller and the love of his life having to trek through the country, hating and loving each other all at once. YOU GUYS turned it into what it ended up being. You asked for more and you cheered and encouraged me on to the finish line. This little world has blown up and it’s all thanks to you reading, liking, commenting and reposting each chapter. I will never be able to put into words how thankful I am for y’all.

All good things come to an end, and for now, this is the end of Rosebud, Joel and Ellie’s weekly adventures. I’m already planning some one-shots and future chapters about life in Jackson, but they’ll come much more infrequently. I will keep the taglist open for whoever (16+) wants to join along the way, but my gosh, I’m so going to miss writing this every week. This has been such a fun few months, getting to watch TLOU every Sunday evening and then hit the keyboard with ideas for new chapters. Writing Twenty Years Later will definitely be one of my favorite parts of this year.

I love and cherish all 2.3k of my new friends that I’ve gotten to meet since starting this. To all of you, from the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.

And, of course, when you’re lost in the darkness, look for the light 😉💖

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