#i might post more of my art in general but im still thinking about it
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Y'ALL I DREW APHRODITE
✨💝🌹🌷🦢🕊️🍎🏛️✨
#Aphrodite#art#my art#i might post more of my art in general but im still thinking about it#hellenistic polytheism#hellenistic pagan#hellenism#hellenic#hellenic deities#paganism#pagan#pagan witch#babywitch#withcraft#witchling#imma put it on her altar once i set it up
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a friend who'd wait :)
#im posting this very late because i was sort of weary of how it came out and ended up messing w it until it was like 4am oops.#and i have plans tmrw so... oh well! i did my best and ill put it out while i can!#and i tried to make the scene match barnard's colors lol#finn's ocs#finn's art#i know i said id do more sillay stuff with the simpler screentone only style but i had a couple more of these in me#and this is the first piece im making thats like an actual part of the story too rather than just setting stuff for fun#i wanna write something to go with it too but for now ill just sort of briefly explain the context in the tags here:#barnard has a pretty bad case of OCD and his compulsions have made it difficult to make friends in the past#he was never outright bullied or anything but people just didnt really have the patience to deal with it#he has compulsions that include stuff like walking through doors until it feels right and needing things to be perfectly aligned#which in group settings has lead to people having to wait for him to finish his rituals and join them#they might find it tolerable at first but eventually they grow impatient and hes just... not invited to stuff anymore#but juno is a newer member of the guild who ends up frequenting the same library. hes also kinda a little weird#and they dont become fast friends or anything but just sort of naturally spend time in the same place#though they never plan meetups they eventually fall into a routine. around the same time theyd just both be at the library#and read next to each other. and maybe talk a bit. and eventually they end up walking back to the guildhall together#since theyre going to the same place after all. and juno always waits for barnard outside the door#eventually barnard asks if this bothers him. juno kinda just tells him 'of course it does' without any malice or anything. just a statement#barnard is surprised and apologizes and juno says not to. but the next day juno doesnt show up at the usual time.#barnard assumes hes committed somekinda more by bringing it up. he ends up staying there late reading to get his mind off it & not ruminate#but when he leaves juno is in fact still waiting for him down the hall (see pic) having collected a bunch of books literally abt ocd#he fell asleep bc barnard stayed later than expected. and hes an eepy guy generally. and also one very bad at expressing himself#but now barnard gets that juno's 'of course it [bothers me]' had the implication of 'but its worth it' which no friend has previously done.#and from the interaction juno was also able to understand that this isn't something barnard just does for the hell of it so. he studies.#and checks a bunch of stuff out because he thinks it could help his friend too (theres ocd workbooks and such- i remember working w them)#and thats the point where they became more ''friends'' than ''pleasant library acquaintances''#from there on they also do get into juno's problems. whole other bag of worms. but this specific scene is more about bernard from his pov#sorry about when i said briefly explain. i lied </3#but compared to the whole sequence im picturing its brief so shhh
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its always morally correct to wish death on your ex
#personal#my posts#i am actually doing Generally okay with all of this#i fucking hate him and i hope he dies. but jm okay#im having these weird mixed emotions#i cried twice today in second period but like. im laugjing more#and i keot sayibg i wanted to drop them all anyways#i guess they did it for me?#still hurts more than anythinf#“i loved him” if yoy did then why did you break up with me lol#“oh maybe we can try agaib one day” we Both know thats only happening if i reach out first#youdidnt care enough to text after months until i did it first#but honestly im trying my best not tk think about it because being upset is what he wants from me#imnot govinf him that. im not feeling bad over something he caused#i hate him and i hope he dies. but its okay#maybe kne day i can be hashtag normak enough to talk tk him without bursting into tears#hes really sayinghow imade himfeel fuckcjing manajic wheni had panic attacks because the guy who sits across from me#in art class looks lile him#like ughhow fo you not see what you did to me! you caused the worst 3 months of my life. thanks i guess...#but i find it hard tj care seeing as im always second best#i knownyou like that fucking guy better than you ever liked me#but it wouldve been nice if you ag least tried to hide it#all of that said. i might be okat
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theres one image going around that i initially reckoned to be ai but the brushstrokes are pretty human. but the art still feels like its from ai. just thinking
#theyre pretty young too and i might be wrong.#but yes my first rxn upon seeing that image was woah. ai art on my tl? woah#and for better or worse im a big truster of my gut instincts#personally im on the fence about using ai in art but generating images and then using it without the appropriate label is not cool#esp fanart. thats just sloppy. if youre gonna work computers into art at least do it out of appreciation for the art form and not slop#even more so for characters u love and think abt often and dearly#ignore me if its not ai and im just being a prick tho. hmm#non related i also find redrawing/working over ai to be distasteful.#youre taking a shrivelled synthetic shit and waving your hands over it. congrats its still shrivelled synthetic shit#AGAIN. IGNORE ME IF ITS NOT AI. I MEAN NO OFFENCE & THIS POST IS MEANT FOR THIS BLOG ONLY. IM TOO STRESSED FOR DRAMA
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Sorry, I'm asking here because asks aren't on your doomreed account, but do you have any fic recs for them ? You and vinnies art have intrigued me 😭 they both seem like such wet cats in different ways, and I love that
help i didnt know asks were off fixed that now thank you... I have two fics i keep in my back pocket as like, exemplary distillations of their whole thing (one in college vs one of their usual superhero stuff,) these are;
Supersymmetry and Night Blooms
Rly good examples of their usual shenanigans, the second one is directly based on a canon comic issue that *feels* like fanfic by a prolific yaoi author, the first is set in a modern-time re-imagining of the fantastic four where they meet in a supergenius internship thinktank for gifted youngsters. There's other fics that are good but i think they might be super confusing without canon context! which leads me to my second point. After you read these fics...
A lot, and i mean A LOT of official doomreed stuff feels straight up like fanfic. Either because its so beautifully woven or insane in concept (doctor doom points a gun at the real life Jack Kirby and Stan Lee to get himself written back into reed's life in his 3rd ever classic appearance, in the 60's, THAT'S the bodyswap issue)
or because the literal authors themselves come out to say 'they're soulmates' or 'they're in love' and Im talking abt this:
(^joseph culp, the first ever doom actor from 1994)
(^fantastic four (2019))
I've got even more stuff under the cut!! AND recs!!! CLICK! v v v
(^jonathan hickman, author of arguably the best FF saga & Secret Wars (2015)!!!)
(^Cantwell, author of the Doctor Doom comic!!)
These are excerpts from the canon fantastic four book, DOOMGATE:
There's even an RPG INSTRUCTION MODULE based on the idea of an earth where Reed & Victor partner up in college, Reed dies a tragic death (via their lab experiments) and Victor assumes such a traumatized widow role in his honor that he grows up to be a golden hero and protector of earth LOL (still a bit nuts):
This is not even to touch on the breadth of all their comic issues and little moments together. Victor canonically delivers Reed's second child and he chooses her name! Shes treated like his child too and calls him uncle doom!!
...Victor even asks Reed out on candlelit dinner dates for a yearly Latverian holiday!
In fact, that's the great starter doom/reed issue i keep recommending: read [ My Dinner With Doom right here. ]
If you enjoy that, check out my [ broader post guide for doomreed reading. ]
Still on the fence? try out these single comic issues:
Doctor Doom:
*Fantastic Four (1961) annual 2 (Classic origin of Doom issue)
*Some call it MAGIC (the introduction of Doom's struggle w/ the devil for his mother's soul)
Doomreed:
*Marvel Two-in-One (2017) annual 1
*Marvel Two-in-One (2017) #11 (2nd fic i linked is based on this!!!!!!!!!)
*'Duel Intentions' short story
*Doom 2099 (2019)
*Fantastic Four #700 special
*Shame Itself (noncanon satire mini)
Anyway I've had a lot of fun reading these series generally and their big, year-spanning arcs are incredible. People hype up Secret Wars for a reason, Hickman's fantastic four builds up a really compelling doom/reed epic of cosmic divorce proportions. And its about love! And Forgiveness!
#hexposts#doomreed#meta tag#victor von doom#reed richards#fantastic four#mister fantastic#doctor doom#mr fantastic#dr doom#fantastic 4#marvel comics#FF#fic rec#long post
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well here's something I can do!
this is a little spin on an idea i've been seeing around that i think is wonderful... I personally, am not in the best financial place to be donating, but i can use my platform as a game developer to help out and do something cool at the same time :3
In exchange for donating esims to gaza, I'm gonna populate the world of Zephyr Star with your characters as NPCs! currently: OPEN!!
Here's the deal-- scurry on over to gazaesims.com to figure out how to buy and donate an esim to the people who need em-- any plan works for me, as long as you're gettin something out there!
then slip into my DMs (or anywhere else you can contact me directly) and show me a screenshot of the email, preferably with timestamps for proof that it's from after this post was posted... or really, any proof that you did do the thing-- also show me:
a reference image for what character you want me put in the game
what this character should say as an NPC (just a few lines at most) (optional; if you'd like i can just write some general dialogue instead)
how you would like to be credited in the in-game credits (ie what name i should put)
below the cut are some submission guidelines and extra notes, please also read that if you're interested :>
here are some general submission guidelines:
nothing too lewd, please!
or racist
or otherwise offensive
fandom ocs MIGHT be fine if they're Legally Distinct enough from the source material, but try not to get me sued here
In general, this game's world has No Humans, but that's not a strict requirement-- just a general suggestion
and keep in mind that characters with super intricate details might have to be simplified in order to work as pixel art
otherwise, anything works! furries, robots, sentient objects, your cat, whatever
and here's some notes, so you know what to expect:
i'll take anywhere between a few hours to a few days to finish, depends on how i'm feeling... either way, i'll tag you in a new post when i'm done!
the character will be done in small pixel art, with maybe some additional effects if i feel it works for the design
i will adjust the sprite size depending on the character-- an average sized character is drawn on a 32x32 canvas but if it's like a giant or really tall or something, i'd make it bigger so that the scale is accurate
everyone also gets a zoomed in headshot for the dialogue portrait
no secret bosses, shopkeepers, or other special story purpose for now, sorry! these are just some guys that stand around and say 1 or 2 lines as you go about your adventure
im putting the characters in various places at random, but if you want your guy to be in a certain type of location in-game let me know
this game is STILL in relatively early development-- but i do promise that each and every submission will be in there by the end! it might take yeaaaars for the full game to finally be out, but i'll be posting screenshots as I put em in the game so you know im not slacking around :>
and alongside the screenshot, i'll also post the sprites on their own if you'd like to save them for yourself
legal stuff uhhhhh im not good at legal stuff-- by participating, you are giving me permission to use your submitted character in the final game-- credit will be given in-game where you would expect to see it (the credits) and i will not claim ownership of any of your guys
(cartoon mafia boss voice) if at any point you want your character scrubbed out of the game, or you want anything changed, let me know in my DMs or anywhere else you can contact me and *click* *sinister laugh* we'll make it happen
no money goes to me ever, im not even gonna be the middlesnake between you and the esims-- i just think its less of a hassle to work this way -w-
did i get everything? i think that's everything... if i forgot something important sorry i'm a scatterbrain failgirl who has never done anything like this before im trying my best okay
may the rift be filled with your cool little guys!
but more importantly, let's keep gaza connected! free palestine! 🍉
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Hii!! Can u do tadc x reader who's mute?? (If ur too tired to do the whole cast u could just do jax and pomni) tyy!! :33
Pomni, Jax and Ragatha x mute!reader !
except ragatha has already been done before and im just linking her post in since its the same prompt eheheheh! think im going to answer just a few requests today; feeling a lil blugh since i didnt sleep well last night and i still got art stuff to do ... might continue my metalocalypse rewatch binge too
POMNI:
i think it would take her a moment to grow accustomed to your muteness. sometimes, at least in the beginning, she waits for you to speak before giving a soft "oh".. she doesnt mean to be malicious or mean, its all a matter of her getting used to things! add in that she has other things going on in regards to being thrusted into this new environment..! i think she would carry around a notepad and pen in her jesters hat for you to use when speaking to her, though i do think she is trying to learn sign language so you guys can more easily communicate... me thinks she might be a slower learner, though, mostly because as mentioned before theres just so much going on for her..! definitely very sweet about it though and tries to speak up if people are ignoring you in a conversation; though its a little meek and awkward she doesnt really give up on making sure you're heard
RAGATHA:
you can find her part here! funny enough this is my first TADC post (the random thing doesnt count)
JAX:
definitely a faster learner of sign language if thats your main means of communicating with other people. you guys have probably gotten into at least one argument before and yes hes the type to turn the lights off so he cant see your signing or your writing. is it petty? yes, but i can definitely see jax doing that. kind of reminds me of that one post/meme where op talks about how a deaf kid took their ice cream and when they signed to the kid. the kid just. closed their eyes. probably closes his eyes when youre trying to scold him for his trickster behavior LMAO. despite that, i think similar to pomni hes going to make sure no one talks over you, but unlike pomni hes not awkward about it. actually hes going to be obnoxious about it and may or may not unintentionally put you on the spot and embarrass you... or maybe he did that on purpose, knowing jax.. doesnt use your muteness against you though, in regards to pranks and his general assholery. like outside of him being kind of an ass when you guys are arguing, hes not going to do anything that could harm you. jax is an asshole but hes not a monster
#tadc x reader#the amazing digital circus x reader#digital circus x reader#jax x reader#jax x you#pomni x reader#pomni x you#ragatha x reader#ragatha x you
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watching a 1992 Donna Tartt interview where she describes writing her first draft of The Secret History as setting out on a cross-country trip with only a map, not knowing what kind of unexpected detours she might run into along the way and then figuring out her way through them. She also likens getting to know her characters over the course of the writing to getting to know a good friend -- at first you think you've got them figured out, but with more time and in new situations, you learn all kinds of new shades to them.
and it strikes me. that neither cross country trips nor getting to know friends quite works out that way anymore. Today we have Google directions that can update relatively in real time to reflect not only changes in the roads and byways, but short-term construction and traffic jams as well. and while there's certainly an element of surprise to befriending somebody still, things aren't quite so much of a mystery anymore as they were before social media. today it's quite easy to make an informed guess based on a person's posting habits which movies theyd want to see with you, whether they'd like to visit an art gallery or a park or a club. and you know what's going on in their life so much of the time, or at least what they broadcast about it, so you get to develop a sense of their patter and their insecurities and what makes them spiral.
and i wonder if human beings on the whole are less comfortable with uncertainty now, and see themselves as less capable of weathering unexpected challenges -- be that a pothole or a conversation with no script -- because we haven't gotten to exercise that self-trust of embarking on the road with only a map that Donna describes.
i know that when i encounter an unexpected problem and i can solve it, it helps me feel powerful. it helps me feel that my world has expanded in some triumphant little way. now i know how to install a curtain rod. i will never not know how to do it again. now i know how to fix a biplane closet track thats bent. now i know how to donate blood and what to do before. i know how to tell a boorish dude at a bar to leave my friend and i alone because now i've done it. and the more things that i become able to do, the greater faith i have in my own ability to do things generally -- to learn, to fix, to adapt. im no luddite but i am someone who always wants to google unknowable information, such as whether a bartender will yell at me for ordering the wrong kind of drink at the wrong sort of bar. but i have that all backwards now dont i. the only way i get over that anxiety is not by getting all the information, but by getting experience moving into places where i dont have the information. driving on the roads when the maps are out of date.
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Hey Q! Sorry for bothering you, but for some reason I can no longer find any of your tik tok accounts 😭 Did they get deleted or something?
Hi this is Q! I’m coming out of the woodwork to address this, since I did went radio silent out of the blue so it’s not a bother at all
The short answer is Yes, I deleted my tiktok
Yes delete not deactivate, I’m not coming back to That app or IG or Twt, I deleted my socials except here and YouTube, I honestly felt so overwhelmed with everything, I realized I’m not even posting for myself anymore there. A lots of people crossed my boundaries time and time again I felt so helpless, bitter with myself. I guess I was just overwhelmed with the attention I got; both positive and negatives ones.
Im done and I want to start over so that’s why I’m here and on YouTube, I already posted some of these on my community tab on YT but here’s what I have in mind for the future of the content I want to create: more detail under the cut, and also;
CW: very brief mention of spiraling, harm inflict oneself or others, paranoia, etc
•Long-form content: my attention span is a bit messed up from consuming and making short-form content to the point where I can’t focus in university. I want to create something meaningful. It’s not that my previous content was not meaningful, no. I had fun and no time is wasted when I have fun, it was warm… but as I mentioned earlier, I just felt this lingering bitterness the longer I stayed making those short-form content. It really felt like I was on the verge of losing it. Especially with how the bigger following I have the less people think of me as a person than just another content creator you see on the internet,
I want to create long-form content, I’m so tired of forcing myself to generate 15 second content. On tiktok it just feels like I’m just creating and not really connecting. I want to try something new, maybe create an open space for meaningful discussion in the comments. I don’t think I can stand another copy-paste tiktok comment anymore. You know what I meant if you’re frequent on that app.
•Art Content with Commentary: and don’t worry this won’t be those petty artist drama issue, but I will still cover anything serious
it could be love letters or video essays ranging from fan fictions, fandom culture, the art scene and so much more. I may even share a bit of my personal life, this will be self indulgent after all! I want to make it fun for myself and as well to those who comes across my channel. I really REALLY want to create a genuine following.
On tiktok it’s so easy to gain following but not so easy to retain them, it’s mostly because of the algorithm and the FYP feature there.
On Tiktok most content that would get featured as an artist there would be creative work has to be either; more than exceptional which is pressuring enough already to consistent posters, straight up suggestive content shown to minors (tiktok doesn’t really have a blocked keywords feature but it’s so disheartening to see these creators intentionally not using the sensitive warning since it could limit their reach significantly) oh yes we can’t forget the negativity surrounding beginner artists or “art lore”
All of this cesspool of negativity, it’s a whole can of worms but it will be one of my prominent topics that I wish to discuss in my future art commentaries. I hope you guys are looking forward to those! I might bring in a few people or so to talk about it with me
and finally;
•Streaming: I used to do a lot of streams during the weekends on the clock app and it was super fun! I want to bring that back but that would have to wait since I’m unfamiliar with some features on YouTube, and I’m aware that YT does not have a discoverable feature for stream but that’s alright, I want to start something small first.
In short; I’ll figure it out! just need some baby steps before I start streaming again.
.
I apologize for deleting everything out of the blue, if I’m gonna be honest it was partially planned because I’ve been thinking about deleting my tiktok, twitter and Instagram for a while now but how it happened? In my breakdown I realized that I don’t want anyone to see me spiral, especially now that I realized how young my audience are, I’m not sure how that happened but I guess posting fandom contents does attract the young ones somehow inevitably, even though my content is nowhere near as suggestive, but I do talk about serious topics from time to time… but I digress, its not fair for them to deal with me if they see me spiral publicly,
it is especially not fair to them to console me. When I was younger than 14, I’ve been in a position where I have to talk down someone who was older, maybe 4-5 years older than me, from harming themselves or anyone, it was traumatizing and unpleasant. I don’t wish for anyone to go through that, it’s very painful.
It’s been… hard for me to ground myself. Ive been seeing things through a kaleidoscope of emotions; I was trying to focus on everything but it’s just too overwhelming so eventually I cracked. But please don’t worry I’ve been doing better now, after some time away from my online persona, and of course spending time with my beloved girlfriend, I see things much more clearly now.
Thank you to anyone who read this and much so appreciate those who understand where I’m coming from
Also now that I think of it can my stuff be considered as lost media now? Amazing! But please don’t be sad the fun I had was genuine!
Thank you again to those who genuinely enjoyed my content on tiktok but it’s time for me to try my hand at something new, I will still be dwelling in my creative headspace just.. away from public for now,
if you’re looking forward for my future post, make sure to check out my YouTube! I still have a lot I need to cook hehe, this is one of the few!
More post soon, Bye bye! -Q
#vent#mental health#mentions of unhealthy habits#I’m not sure how to tag these but I’ll try my best!#social media#q myers#tiktok#burnt out#creative fatigue#sorry for the rant#rant#content creator#art community
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This took over 20 hours to make I'm deceased... I'm glad it's done I need a break lol
Close ups on the pins under the cut!! (And some extra little notes for fun)
The formatting and graphic design could be better but, again, I just want to be done 😭 so ummm oops sorry !!
Yay yum yayaya art woooo yes !!!
More notes for fun !!
- when I say "loves animals (... not many, but still)" it means he can, has, and WILL burn squirrels alive for free entertainment, as well as shooting animals for fun... but he would also cry and feel awful if he stepped on a dog's foot... he's got favorites, basically, and does NOT hide it
- sun freckles, because why not
- kinda a dirty kid... literally the definition of "boys will be boys 🤪" where he's just always getting into the weirdest shit. You take your eyes off him for 1 second and he returns with mud all over himself and probably has a cat or something and just has the dumbest smile on his face !!! Idiot kid love him tho
- I added a gir pin because I love gir and for fun, doesn't matter if it doesn't make sense.... just roll with it !!
- made him Trans bc psychonauts as a whole is a trans allegory in my mind so, it made sense !! And because he's... 10 he hasn't done anything medical yet, just socially transitioned !! (Adding this point because some people see that and think the wrong things, like those ppl who think 4 year Olds are getting surgery and forcefully getting hormones jabbed into them. NO that's not happening)
- if he was a 2000s kid he'd like a lot of different things, like Mario and sonic games, and certain TV shows and movies (like invader zim, pokemon shows/movies, Disney stuff etc. Just general kids stuff yk?)
- sasha gave him coffee once.... he then proceeded to ramble about random things for hours while he tried to help work on things. So, he was able to focus better but won't shut UP (I'm projecting)
- he enjoys media that reminds him of himself, which is the "odd man out" type stuff, it helps him feel better about feeling like he doesn't belong bc he knows he isn't alone. It's sad but it helps him idk!!
OKAY IM DONE (for now) but yippee wow isn't that cool !!! I'm curious what yall think so lmk if u wanna !! I love hearing what Y'all think of my stuff, and I might post more headcanon type stuff later on if that's something ur interested in, honestly just send me an ask if u wanna know my hc for specific characters!!
OKAY goodbye drink water 💖
#psychonauts#my art#fanart#psychonauts fanart#razputin aquato#psychonauts 2#psychonauts razputin#fan ref sheet#psychonauts fan ref
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canine girl in all her doggy glory!! already posted her design and profile the other day, but i updated her profile and i want all her images in one post.. speaking of her profile, warning warning for talk of violence there
more on canine (+ lyrics?!! Woah!!) under the cut:)
canine girl is inspired/an au of my oc alík, but i don't think it'd be wrong to say she's a different character alltogether? while the things she struggles with are things that alík does, too, she's more like.. idk ❤️only i can understand this ...
as you may have guessed by her warning, canine girl has violent intrusive thoughts, and feels extremely guilty for them, even if she never acts out on them. her profile doesnt get too into this .. since she feels that guilt and shame, i don't think she'd wanna share the details online .. or with anybody ever.. you know how it is 💥
her design is smth i struggled with greatly .. her mask is this
and as soon as i saw it on alíks pinterest board i was set on using it and im sooo happy i did!! i think it works greatly..!!! other notable things about her design, that im happy with, are mostly to do with her hoodie. her hoodie-ears are actual ears, shes just hiding them:) and its made to resemble a service dog vest!
you can't really see it in the 'fake screenshot' art, the first one, but she's got a kind of belt (harness ?) around her chest !! its around her shoulders too.. and her chain hanging from that could be interpreted as a leash ig ?? idk 💥💥you'll never understand sinister minds inner workings... another design-y thing is !! shes got her arms around herself in the fake screenshot, which is bc she's hiding her claws from you 💥her eyes are also made to resemblea wolfs:)
her pants are just like that bc its alíks fashion sense 💥and bc i think they fit! and i like them!! a little treat just for me:)
another thing that i wanna talk about is her profile!! its so !! chill !! the colours are warm and inviting, her info there is silly, she invites you to talk with her if you're struggling, shes got fun blinkies.. !! shes just having fun on a site hanging out and chilling .. its like that bc i wanted to show, even if in a little way, that intrusive thoughts arent indicative of a persons identity. canine's intrusive thoughts don't make her a bad person, they don't make her a rabid dog like she thinks, they just make her somebody with intrusive thoughts. shes more than her intrusive thoughts, you know ??
anyhow! the lyrics !! i wrote lyrics for a theoretical song that she would have, but Wont, because im not a songwriter. i might make a silly littly tune for her one day, like a minute long at most, most likey shorter, so these lyrics are what you get !! and also it was my second time writing actual lyrics (first time was 10 minutes before when i was writing lyrics for another tptm oc, unknown girl) so Dont be meanies... Ok... treat me niceys... her voice for this would be kohaku merry btw :3
warning, again, more specified this time: themes of violent intrusive thoughts, talk of violence, vague references to generational abuse
That I’m just like a dog, I know
Got the leash and collar to show
Tug it one way, then another
I’ll obey you like no other
But obedience doesn’t cut it
With teeth sharper than a razor blade
The only way to be is afraid
That’s what I say, anyway
Can’t say I’m sorry, not to you
That’d scare me, letting you know
About your mangled body on the floor
Still just a fantasy, nothing more
(Violent thoughts suppressed)
Ineffective muzzle helps little
(Violent needs repressed)
‘Cause my razors make it brittle
It’s not on purpose, just my spittle
Can’t help my second nature
(BEAT ME, FLAY ME, LEAVE ME DEAD
PLEASE DO YOUR WORST, I BEG
IT WON’T BE UNDESERVING
TO BEAT A WILD DOG SENSELESS
GIVE IT YOUR ALL, YOUR EVERYTHING
WE BOTH KNOW I’D DO WORSE
WERE I NOT A DOG BUT SOMETHING
LIKE I AM NOW, JUST SHAMELESS)
The carpet floor’s forever stained
A family heirloom of violence and hate
Trying so hard to reject that norm
Can’t help but feel it’s all I’m destined for
Gotta stop myself with only a collar
Can’t be like my father’s bully father
So as long as you hold my leash
I swear I’ll hide my deepest needs
Even if it’s not real, I fear
You’ll reach into me and see
All these sinful fantasies
Of your bloody arteries
I don’t mean them, believe me
It’s just that this is all I know how to be
A mutt that doesn’t know any better
Only to claw and dismember
(Violent thoughts excessed)
Maybe it’s just natural selection
(Violent needs processed)
Can no longer deny this connection
That I’m just like a dog, I know
Got all this shame to show
Your hands are only ever kind
A stark contrast to my mind
It’s not real, just thoughts, I know
Adrenaline still fills me though
My collar thins, soon it will snap
Go away, don’t want you here for that
Your kindness is naivety
My impending misery
Your outstretched hand is prey
Don’t say I didn’t warn you
Here comes the prophesised day
Where the hand feeds no more
(WITH MY LEASH AND MUZZLE GONE
YOU MISTAKE FOR A FAWN
YOU THROW MY COLLAR TO THE FLOOR
I BEG, PUT IT BACK ON
NOT YOUR FAULT, BUT C’MON
DON’T BE SO CRUEL AND SHOW ME
I’M THE ONLY VICTIM TO MY FANTASY)
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Hello! This may sound a bit weird, but do you have any advice or recommendations on getting into this niche? I've kind of been watching from afar on several blogs, and I really want to try and test the waters! But I'm not really sure how to go about it, and I'm super scared that I'll end up just talking to a brick wall, having my mutuals find out, or have people ridicule me :')
Thank you for any and all help - I love your art!! Been hanging around for a while now and the progress you've made is so cool
- Clueless Anon
Oh I totally getcha! That's not a weird question at all! /gen /pos
Starting out with this kinda thing is really difficult, I know from experience. It took me months to hype myself up enough to even create this blog, let alone start posting on it, and I had (and still kinda do) those same fears you expressed, they're all very valid but hopefully what I share can help a bit with making your experience more manageable :3
The information I'll share here consists of opinions based on my personal experience posting on this blog, and getting into the belly kink community in general
I'll break it up into steps from what I sorta did when I started out so it makes a bit more sense.
STRUCTURE YOUR BLOG - Make an introduction post with general information about what to expect from your blog, and some other information about yourself if you want to. I like to include a few other things like some of my hard boundaries and leave it as a PINNED POST so that anyone who comes across your account will see this information
BLOCK YOUR MUTUALS - I have the same exact fear of being "found out" by people im close to or just know outside of this space, so once you set up the bare essentials on your blog, look for your mutuals accounts and block them. If you think a mutual of yours might have a blog but you're not sure, ask them! (Something I did was I asked my mutuals to send me their blogs so I could check them out when in reality it was so I could do this exact thing) Don't see blocking as something inherently malicious or bad, it's just a protective measure and a way to curate your experience on the internet in a way that is comfortable for you!
INTERACT WITH YOUR FELLOW ARTISTS! - I know it may not seem like something super important, but interacting with other artists is a very good way to establish yourself in the community, reblogging, tagging and replying to posts you like with nice comments have the potential for others to check out your blog or interact with you as well! I got lucky enough that I found similar communities outside of Tumblr beforehand, but it's still an effective way to get yourself out there and seen!
START POSTING! - Besides my intro post, my first post was something that I wanted to curate in a way that would encourage conversation. I shared several of my ocs that I planned on posting here and some basic information about them, and opened up asks! It's always gonna be a pretty slow start, but as long as you put the time into your work and are passionate about what you want to share, people will find your stuff! It's hard sometimes, especially when comparing yourself to others is such a common thing for people to deal with (including myself sometimes) but everyone's gotta start somewhere!
Starting out anywhere is difficult in itself, but with things like this that are more sensitive subjects for people, I completely understand your uncertainty and nervousness about sharing this kind of content online. But as long as you're not hurting anyone or sharing harmful content, I don't see why people should be so stinky about others just trying to explore different parts of themselves and their interests.. Kinks shouldn't inherently be seen as something to be ashamed of just because someone doesn't understand it. I've been lucky enough to have close friends in this community who have helped me become more comfortable with myself and with sharing my chonky art, and I'm incredibly grateful for that.
I'm flattered you came to me for advice, I hope some of that can help you on your journey, and thank you for sticking around for so long, it means a lot to have your support ;;w;; 💖
I hope things go well for you! I'm cheering you on anon!!
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life update + graphic novel FAQ!
hello! i’ve been hard at work on my book, but i wanted to share one of my favorite panels ♥ and i thought i’d take a moment to answer some asks! hope everyone has been well~
book Q&A:
🌸 chippedmoon asked:
Hi! I just found your Momo and Priscilla art and I’m wondering: where are they from???? I really want to read about or watch them. Thanks!!!
hello!! momo and pg are my original characters! you’ll be able to read about them in my upcoming graphic novel (!!!)
🌸 desmond-the-queer-dragon asked:
Hey! I just saw your artwork and I am absolutely in LOVE!! When is your graphic novel coming out and what will the title be??? IM BEYOND HYPED
🌸 chronodisplaced asked:
Hi! When is your graphic novel out? Is it out yet? I'd love to read it :)
AHH thank you so much!!! it’s going to be called If You’ll Have Me, and it’s currently slated for fall 2023! we originally planned for a spring release but had to push things back because of industry-wide supply chain issues, printing delays, etc... for a more in-depth explanation i found this twitter thread very helpful!
🌸 sleeepyinseattle asked:
Hi! Love Momo and PG. Do you have an estimated release date and/or link to your graphic novel? I'd love to purchase it when it comes out!
thank you so much! i’ll definitely be sharing preorder links when they are available, and the second i can confirm a date, i promise i will not shut up about it! i’m very bad at being active online but i really am excited and anxious to share this little story with the world.
🌸 Anonymous asked:
Hi! I absolutely am in love with your artwork and original characters. I remember reading a while ago that there was production happening to animate them. Is that still happening?
thank you! oh gosh, i think you might be referring to the graphic novel that was announced? other than that, i can only think of this short animation i made of momo for fun. but if there was an official animation happening i would 100% be losing my mind
🌸 Anonymous asked:
You don't know how fast I'm gonna buy your graphic novel THE SECOND it comes out
OMG!! THANK YOU AW... just seeing people excited about it and looking forward to it really brings a tear to my eye. i’ve kept a lot of asks regarding the book announcement (and momo / pg in general!) because they are so sweet and kind... i appreciate all of them so much, thank you from the bottom of my heart!!
misc Q&A
⭐️ Anonymous asked:
Hello! I looked on your socials and didn't see anything, so I was curious if you offer prints/would be interested in starting to do so? That piece that you posted on November 7th made me tear up a little and I would love to add it to my wall of sapphic art.
thank you so much! i actually planned to reopen my shop this summer but had to push it back because i’m so busy. i’m still aiming for the end of this year though! i’ve been in touch with a company that does store management and bulk fulfillment, so i’m optimistic. the last time i had to pack and ship everything from home and oh my god... how do people do this regularly. my deepest apologies to everyone who previously ordered from me because i realized there were so many ways i could’ve done better after the fact. keeps me up at night sometimes lmaO
(this next ask is in reference to my rem / misa fanart and the first time i saw it in my inbox i screamed in delight. just wanted to give everyone the context so we can fully appreciate this)
⭐️ Anonymous asked:
they’re actually t4t goth gfs because i said so
anon how does it feel to have the biggest brain
(end of q&a! you can stop here if you'd like to skip my little diary entry. haha)
general life update
i wanted to make this post three months ago but in a tragic turn of events, the one day i set aside to accomplish some personal tasks made a terrible mess of my plans 😔 the deadline i mentioned back then was for inks, so i’ve since moved on to color! i’ve been working in the morning, then coloring in the evening and through the night. it’s pretty grueling, but i’m trying to be good about stretching and resting because if my body disintegrates i can’t draw more gay shit and what then?
i feel like i’m doing okay, all things considered! i’m just tired mostly. god, i’m so tired...
this book has been my life for all of 2022 which is why i don’t have much else to talk about 😂 i have a big deadline coming up so i’m really hustling right now. i actually have to deal with packing and moving as soon as i’m done, so i’m not sure when i’ll pop up again! maybe late september, maybe october... we’ll have to see!
thank you everyone for your endless patience ❤️
#if you'll have me#anon#replies#chippedmoon#desmond-the-queer-dragon#chronodisplaced#sleeepyinseattle#iyhm
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Do you have any fic recs similar to your take on iroh? Treating him as an actual character with some fucked up issues is SO much more fun!! I love him and I am chewing on your art
YES!!!!!!!! everytime i post about shithead iroh moments i get nervous someones gonna think i dont like him or im anti iroh or whatever but i genuinely honest to god think his less than savory past and personality traits ON TOP of the things about him that make him so beloved by the fandom makes him better. like yeah i love all parent characters that are just big softies but big softie parents that also are kinda (very much ) fucked up are even better. to ME. and i dont usually judge how good characters are on the basis of how good of a parent they are which is oddly something that a Lot of people do but. U wont find any of that on this blog which is also why i loveeeee ursa.
BUT I DIGRESS! here is my absolute favorite. its unfinished but what is there is still very loaded. digs in deep to iroh. gets pretty nitty gritty with it too. it changed how i see iroh and specifically season 1 iroh. it balances his b1 behavior with his later revealed status as a grand lotus MASTERFULLY, and puts his manipulative and cunning side on full display. might even make you mad at him a little bit
this one is less of a take on iroh as like. a general and a grand lotus and the war side of him and more of him as a father. its short and sad and i adore all of this authors fics involving iroh. it still shines a good light on the consequences of irohs own actions though because lu ten dying was literally his fault. the selfishness and the manic desperation that bleeds through this monologue is kind of scary but also is tragically beautiful.
ALSO these specific parts near the end of salvage were REALLY good. i feel like iroh is definitely the kind of guy that does a whole lot of backhanded comments as a way of patronizing without probably even realizing he does it?? i think a lot of people forget that what makes iroh being “changed” different from zuko is that zuko is still a child, and iroh is like. in his fifties or something. a whole LIFETIME of probably doing everything zuko did pre-redemption but far worse, and plenty times over. take how young azula is when ozai let her loose into the world into account. take the fact that iroh was already a general by the time he was sieging bss into account. im not gonna compare and contrast crimes here but i am trying to put weight onto how long iroh has been in the game. nasty shit like this is bound to still creep in the shadows of irohs mind and will definitely slip out sometimes.
and i know i keep bringing up that one unfinished super gnarly au fic that features azulon putting zuko into irohs care following irohs return to ba sing se (after ozai disgraced himself in requesting azulon give ozai the throne since iroh lost his only heir). hopefully one day ill find it because i hate to think the author deleted it or whatever . but out of all the fics that dig into irohs crimes id say this one does it the deepest while also SOMEHOW managing to make iroh sympathetic just by how sheerly pathetic and miserable he is the whole time. ONE DAY THOUGH. i pray that i will find it. because i have like over 200 pages of history on ao3 and i cant remember when exactly i read the fic so . searching for it has been kind of difficult but if i find it trust i will post it lol
#i know this isnt much but for some reason depicting iroh like this is kinda. Uncommon.#WHICH STINKS but whatever.#asks
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I just think it needs to be said that adults have to regulate themselves in online spaces in a way that is responsible for minors in fandom spaces. This will be long im sorry.
And im not specifically talking about adults with lists of DNI minors and block anyone at or under a certain age as well as make it clear their blog may not be safe for minors (ie spaces with a lot of nsfw content). Though curating an experience is a big part of being responsible of course. This post though is mostly delving into adults' behavior and how you need to be aware of your behavior.
For example, if you're an adult who purposefully curates a blog dedicated to fandom discourse, harming other people in the fandom, vagueing, and just having general toxicity about people ESPECIALLY when the targets of said harassment and toxicity are often the youngest in the fandom this is something you really need to reevaluate yourself about for a million reasons but including how this harms and serves as a poor example to younger people what a fandom space is meant to be. Like when I see minors involved in these types of toxicity, not to say they shouldn't be informed or held accountable or the ppl harmed should forgive them, but as an adult I mostly feel sad. I feel sad because I hope they're going to be okay when they're my age and look back on themselves. I hope they're safe esp when the adults around them act like this kind of behavior is normal and okay even though they've long graduated high school (even though ot wasn't okay then either for the record). Like does it not bother you that you're an adult who feels superior sending hate campaigns and ask box harassment and cyberbullying to minors on the internet because you're insecurities are that large and you've no ability to regulate them healthily? Does it not bother you that you teach young ppl in the fandom to do similarly by your actions, and affect their experience? Does the harm not bother you?
Because it should bother you. When you grow up especially in online fandom spaces you do need to be more aware of not only your words in general, but how many people may look up to you and use you as example and that you have a responsibility to be healthy online for the sake of yourself, others, and esp the youngest of the fandom.
Because it hurts to think ppl can grow up in fandom to think "oh sending kys and gore and dead animals over [insert discourse] plus potentially bigotry is normal because everyone around me does it and I want to fit in and I also fear speaking up against the adults who do this because you know the harassment".
And you might say "well cup im just gonna block all minors the end I get to harass people forever hahaha haha!" And well okay, but for another post (plus ones I've made before) there's still a million reasons this is fucked up you see but I'm just focusing on one aspect rn in this post.
And then there's the adults in fandom who all of a sudden hit my age and all they do is belittle kids and the way they act and there is all of a sudden a Certain Maturity that needs to be upheld for Everyone but Especially Adults.
So on the first point this includes adults who are like "I hate kids!!!! They are so [insert anything negative]" and it includes any comment to meta/writing/art/etc that is like not allowing a younger person in fandom to grow. Like the way I talked as 11 years on the internet was incomprehensible and frankly would've been subject to "omg kids are so cringe ew!" For sure these days, ig I was lucky my online friends were also 11 at the time. Looking at my old fandom Meta posts when I was 15, like I could imagine the way I see adults talking about takes like "oh shit I was worse!" Which is just a bag full of insecurity for me, but I also can't imagine being young in fandom and directly experiencing such critiques all the time. Like does it not bother you, once again? That you don't want to see kids in fandom grow into their creativity and co-exist safely in fandom as they do in public and experience overall and public joy? Why do you hate I mean hateee kids as an adult and why does their joy spark hate and misery in you (you might need therapy or to work that out srsly). And do the effects of your actions not bother you? What do you think you're doing other than silencing the creativity and joy in people and invoking ways to people please or for minors to Act Mature (in reality acting the way these adults want to avoid harassment ofc!) Instead of of course just experiencing joy and fun and community as they would normally.
And that brings me to my last pt of the effects of you hit [adult age] and must Act Mature and not Care About Cringe Fandoms or Watch Cartoons and do anything that would indicate you god forbid Don't Have a Real Job. This is the reality for growing up in fandom its finite once you're 19 no more Cringe of course /s! Because I've been subject to this take before as a criticism, and I've seen essays about how adults who watch Bluey are destroying the world forever, and I can take it because I go to therapy and I'm secure in my own maturity where it matters and joy where it matters. But imagine how younger people in the fandom feel. Like you're basically telling kids "btw once you're at Adult Age you must stop having fun forever and you must have a Real Job (or Education) and stop enjoying Immature things like fandom (even though I am in fandom btw im not a hypocrite saying this) or you're a freak immature adult who will never grow up". Like wow.
Like the conservative and near unnuanced take of to be Mature you need a real job (whatever that means) and to only watch adult shows in a normal manner (again whatever that means) aside, like you're really telling kids to grow up and be insecure. I'm serious! Like of course as you grow up it's important to mature no duh, but with real maturity means realizing there are times to be serious and there are times to enjoy things. Maturity doesn't mean I can never watch bluey god forbid else I have a not real job or become media illiterate as a consequence (esp when actually marketing wise a lot of kids shows are meant to also be entertaining for adults watching with their kids... and lo and behold your media literacy doesn't go away magically the moment the show starts). Like you really want younger ppl in fandom to be miserable and grow up miserable and create a cycle of miserable lest they become Cringe Adults that watch a harmless cartoon and enjoy it.
I'm never good at ending rants like this but conclusion. Get a grip on yourself and insecurities and be really careful how you foster fandom community for yourself but also to those that grow up in these spaces too.
As always add on/send asks/correct me/add nuance/etc. ❤️
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IMPORTANT UPDATE!!
the comic is cancelled. you probably already assumed that since i havent posted anything about it in a while but yeah the things dead now lol. mainly because i dont care much about omori anymore, the comic sucked, and it was too much effort. i feel kinda bad about leaving you guys in the dark for this long tho, so i thought id go ahead and include all the scrapped stuff for the comic that never got finished
while i was writing the comic i started a google doc that laid out ideas i had for future pages. heres that if you wanna know how the story ends
it was written over several months and (most) things are in order of where they go on the timeline not when i wrote them so it might be a little hard to follow
also some art i never posted
(at least i dont think ive posted the last one)
i quoted not liking this comic as one of the reasons i stopped so let me explain that with a list of things id change about this if i were to remake it (which i wont)
remove the swearing that was so stupid
make omori mute (and probably use sign language)
omori does not express fear or stress in-game, thats sunnys job. quit it
he also does not cry and generally shows emotions (even the big ones) in more subtle ways (which i think i was trying to shift towards later in the doc) idk why he was so emotional all the time
literally everything about how i portrayed omori actually that was all just awful
the panic attack scene is fucking embarrassing i have no clue what i was thinking. im so sorry for writing it like that i did 0 research beforehand
make it shorter why did i think that would work out
id probably just make it a fic, comics take way too much outta me compared to just writing things
it does not need a big epic ending and probably shouldve ended not long after they escaped black space
the romance is horrible but thats the foundation of the comic so idek what id do about that
stop making everyone talk like therapists 24/7
and yeah it has a lot of problems but i still do care about this due to the ammount of effort and love ive put into it, i just cant and dont want to continue it
so yeah thats where this story ends ig. i had a lot of fun along the way, and thank you so much for all the support. bigger thanks to that one sunflower discord server (if you came from there you know which one) for being my main motivation and support throughout this journey. sucks this comic never got to see its full potential but im relieved to finally lay it to rest. the blog will stay up for archival purposes but i will not continue the comic any further obviously. the ask box will remain open if you wanna say anything or if you have a question about the story or whatever. thanks for reading.
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