Everyone, we can fix Hamlet and Romeo & Juliet if we just switch the leads.

Romeo wakes up in Hamlet's body and meets the ghost of "his" father telling him to kill his uncle. So if course Romeo just fucking does it, because he never considers consequences, and then gets onto more important shit, like romancing Ophelia, political fallout be damned! But given that he's the son of the murdered king, he'd probably end up on top.

Hamlet wakes up as Romeo and is told that he can't marry the love of his life because his family hates her family. Instead of killing Tybalt and getting Merucio murdered, he's planning elaborate meet-cutes for the two warring families. He's putting on plays about blood feuds and how to overcome them. He either succeeds in bringing the families together or bores Juliet enough with his indecision that the glow wears off and she moves on; both positive options. Everybody lives.

GOOD OMENS in CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER (a fanfic helper)

I tried to find this online, but I only found bits and pieces here and there. This should be a very good tool when writing fanfics, or just for understanding the narrative - so, here's my best attempt at a timeline for the canonized events in the show. Let me know if I missed any, or if something is wrong! CHRONOLOGY of GOOD OMENS 4004 BC: Before the Beginning (Sunday, October 21st, Nowhere, no name for Crowley) Aziraphale meets Crowley as an angel in Heaven pre-Beginning and Crowley makes a star factory. 4004 BC: The Eden Wall (Rather more than 7 days later, Crawley) Crowley finds Aziriaphale on the Eden wall and they talk about right and wrong. Aziraphale gave his sword to Adam and lies to God about it. Eve looks about 6 months pregnant. 3004 BC: Noah’s Ark (Ancient Mesopotamia, Crawley) Crowley finds Aziraphale in front of the Ark and they talk about how God will drown kids. 2500 BC: A Companion to Owls (Land of Uz, Crawley) Crowley and Aziraphale work together to save Job's kids from God. 1353 - 1336 BC: Nefertiti's reign as queen, during which, at some point, Aziraphale did a magic trick for her. (Thebes/Luxor, ancient Egypt, Crawley) (unfilmed, just mentioned) We know he fooled her with a "lone caraway seed and three cowry shells" 33 AD: Crucifixion of Jesus (Golgotha, Palestine, name change to Crowley) Crowley (canonically confirmed female form) tells Aziraphale she showed Jesus the world. 41 AD: Oysters in Rome (41 AD) Aziraphale playfully tempts Crowley to go eat oysters with him at Petronus' restaurant. If this isn't innuendo, I don't know what is. 537 AD: Medieval England/King Arthur (Kingdom of West Essex) Aziraphale as a knight of the Round Table meets the Black Knight (Crowley) who suggests the Arrangement for the first time. Aziraphale says no. 1020: The Arrangement is agreed to (unfilmed, just mentioned in the book or by Neil) I can't find the exact date - tell me if this is wrong? 1040 - 1601: Crowley and Aziraphale act on their arrangement "dozens of times", as mentioned in the Globe Theatre. As far as I've understood this arrangement (correct me if I'm wrong) it means that whenever they receive orders from Heaven or Hell, they tell the other, compare notes, and if it takes place in the same area, they agree that just one of them has to go do both tasks. Either that, or both tell their respective bosses that the task has been done, because they would have cancelled each other out either way. Letters would probably be too risky communication other than "Let's meet up at....", so I assume they have seen a lot of each other during this time. 1500s: Something related to the Catholic Church and the Papacy (Rome?). (Unfilmed idea) My theory: Raphael/Crowley (Raffaello Sanzio da Urbino) works as painter in Rome from 1508 until his "death" in 1520. He was invited to Rome by Pope Julius II and was immediately commissioned to work on a series of frescoes for the Pope's private library in the Vatican Palace. Crowley can't enter consecrated spaces. Hilarity ensues. This would explain his conversation about helicopters (in the book) with Leonardo da Vinci. 1601: Hamlet (Globe Theatre, London) Aziraphale and Crowley meet inconspicuously as Shakespeare struggles with Hamlet (both actor and play), and Aziraphale agrees to do both his and Crowley's assignments in Edinburgh. 1650: Aziraphale does his first apology dance (unknown) Nothing more is known about this event. 1655: Agnes Nutter's book is published, and doesn't sell a single copy. 1656: Agnes Nutter is burned (Lancashire, England, 1656) After writing the Nice and Accurate Prophecies, she is burned by Pulsifer's ancestor. 1793: French Revolution (The Bastille, Paris) Aziraphale puts himself in harm's way by dressing like a nobleman while looking for crepes in revolutionary Paris, just so that Crowley will save him. 1800s: Aziraphale opens his bookshop. (Soho, London) I can't figure out when, it just says 19th century online. Crowley asks if Aziraphale wasn't supposed to open a bookshop when he saves him in the Bastille.

1827: The Resurrectionist (Edinburgh, October) Aziraphale and Crowley discuss morality, meet Elspeth and Wee Morag - and the body snatching doctor.

1827 - ????: Crowley sleeps or is in Hell We don't actually know long or exactly when, but in the book it's mentioned he only got up to go to the toilet once. Why?

1862: St. James’s Park, London Crowley is paranoid, Aziraphale won't give him holy water. 1862 - ????: Wild West meetup (Unfilmed idea) Neil Gaiman just had the idea, it wasn't filmed.

1928: Crowley buys the Bentley And he keeps it in tip-top shape until the Not-Apocalypse. 1933: Aziraphale gets his driving license (unknown location)

1941: WW2 Blitz (London) Church bombing, magic show, photo taken, shades of dark and light grey.

1967: Aziraphale gives Crowley holy water (Soho, London) ...And says Crowley goes too fast for him. He does it because Crowley is about to orchestrate the robbery of a church. One of the robbers is Witchfinder Sergeant Shadwell, who we meet later. He offers his 'army' to Crowley.

1980s: Crowley designs the M25 (Hell) No other demons understand the whole thing about constant, low-level, effortless evil.

2007: Three children are born in a hospital in Tadfield The old switch-a-roo.

2007 - later that night: Godfather meetup (Soho, ca 2009) They're drunk, talking about whale brains and agreeing to raise Warlock as nanny and gardener.

2012 - 2018: Raising Warlock (Winfield House, England) He's way too normal! 2018: Not-Apocalypse (Saturday, August 11th, Tadfield Airbase) Do I need to explain this? 2019 - 2023: Beelzebub and Gabriel start meeting each other. We see them meet in an American bar, a Russian café and in the Resurrectionist in Edinburgh. 2020: Lockdown (London) Aziraphale goes on about cake, Crowley wants to come by and watch him eat. Aziraphale chickens out.

2023: Jimbriel (Soho, London) A naked archangel with amnesia shows up on Aziraphale's doorstep. --- UPDATED AND IMPROVED

We all know that I am First Quarto Hamlet’s number one fan (and I’m probably the only one who thinks I don’t talk about it enough...) so I thought it was time I write out my thoughts on staging Q1′s version of act 3, scene 4, how it affects the plot, and how I understand the odd choices made by its players. Before we begin, here is a rundown on what Q1 is for the uninitiated: https://www.tumblr.com/withasideofshakespeare/704686395278622720/a-rundown-on-the-absolute-chaos-that-is-first?source=share

Another quick note: I will not be adjusting Q1 spelling for this so if it’s in quotes, the spelling errors are some dead guy’s fault. Now, here’s how I’d stage this scene! (Below the cut for your sake)

TW for murder and mention of sexual assault (mentioned by the quarto, not me!)

The first major change I’d make would be tonal. A lot of typical Hamlet productions tend to make this scene angry for Hamlet and terrifying for Gertrude, but I find that the overall tone of Q1 is more subdued. Sorry, Branagh, but no one’s screaming at each other in this production. There’s a quieter horror here. Hamlet enters Gertrude’s chamber calling to her: “Mother, mother, O are you here? How i'st with you mother?” This is significant because it almost seems like he’s let down his guard for a moment. Q1 Hamlet almost never refers to Gertrude as “mother,” only “madam,” and I like the interpretation that Claudius is behind this- Q1 Claudius has the vibes of a step-father who demands that his new wife’s kid refers to his parents as “sir” and “ma’am.” I’d want Hamlet’s tone to be familiar here. He trusts that he’s out of Claudius’s earshot and puts enough hope in Gertrude to assume she won’t rat him out. Upon arriving in her chamber, it should be clear to the audience that Hamlet has an uncanny sensation that he’s being watched. He already knows what he’s going to tell Gertrude (or at least the gist of it) and he knows that being overheard is extremely dangerous. He’s pretty frantic by this point in the play, so we get the line:  “I'le tell you, but first weele make all safe.”

He seems to weigh his options through the next few lines. He looks back at the arras and guides Gertrude away from it, towards her bed. He takes a breath and draws his dagger. He has no intention to hurt his mother, but he is hoping that this half-threat will provoke any onlooker to come forward. Polonius (Corambis, whatever.) cries out from behind the arras and Hamlet whirls around and stabs him through the fabric. There’s no confusion in Hamlet’s next lines as we get in the later versions of the play, so I believe Polonius (Corambis... ugh) either falls forward and Hamlet sees his face or he manages to deduce who it is given that he just saw Claudius in another room.

Gertrude panics and tries to get up. Hamlet knows he only just has time to get a few words in to subdue her so he says the infamous “Not so much harme, good mother, As to kill a king, and marry with his brother.” She sits down again. 

“How! kill a king!“

Hamlet seems to steel his nerves and carries on, his dagger sheathed. He takes down a portrait from the wall: the royal family before things went awry. He ignores his younger self smiling back up at him and turns the painting to his mother. “Why this I meane, see here, behold this picture, It is the portraiture, of your deceased husband, See here a face, to outface Mars himselfe, An eye, at which his foes did tremble at, A front wherin all vertues are set downe For to adorne a king, and guild his crowne, Whose heart went hand in hand euen with that vow, He made to you in marriage, and he is dead. Murdred, damnably murdred”

He watches her intently, gauging her reaction just as he’d instructed Horatio to do at the play. If she’d shrunk away from her now-murderer son before, now she listens intently. He carries on, taking a gamble:

“Looke you now, here is your husband, With a face like Vulcan. A looke fit for a murder and a rape”

He isn’t entirely sure what he intends to imply, but somewhere, subconsciously, he feels he’s right. Gertrude doesn’t want Claudius. (And I think in the context of the First Quarto, he’s right.)

She pleads with him to stop. Maybe she’d suspected Claudius, maybe not. Either way, now she has to keep quiet and pretend everything’s normal with confirmation that Claudius is a killer (and so too is her son...)

The ghost appears. Gertrude shivers. She can’t see or hear it, but she feels it. Hamlet drops the painting and leaps to his feet, torn between attentiveness and terror. Guilt crashes over him. He has failed to kill Claudius. He has killed an innocent man. Hamlet tries to conceal his sobs. The ghost steps towards him, its back to the audience. Hamlet is trembling, but we can’t see his face.

The ghost steps away as instructs him to comfort his mother and we see Hamlet pressed against the wall, tears in his eyes. He turns to Gertrude, mirroring the ghost’s motion, and chokes out  “How i'st with you Lady?”

She responds: “Nay, how i'st with you That thus you bend your eyes on vacancie, And holde discourse with nothing but with ayre?”

It hits him all at once. She can’t see it, she can’t hear it, it can’t vouch for him. His tears spill over. 

He prays he’s wrong. 

“Why doe you nothing heare?” 

“Not I.”

“Nor doe you nothing see?”

Gertrude isn’t sure what to think. If the mad prince tells her to believe that Claudius killed her first husband, does she dare listen?

She responds, shakily: “No neither.”

“No, why see the king my father, my father...” Hamlet reaches out as if to touch the ghost, but it only looks back, sorrowful, and strides away, vanishing into the air.

She says he is mad. She doesn’t know if she believes it. She doesn’t know what to believe. 

Hamlet returns to her side and frantically places her fingers over his wrist. His heart still beats, doesn’t it?

“Idle, no mother, my pulse doth beate like yours, It is not madnesse that possesseth Hamlet.”

He isn’t sure whether he’s convincing her or himself. Gertrude pulls him into her arms. She can’t help it. She feels the blood on his hands, sticky against her dress. She pulls him closer.

He eventually pulls away and implores her on his knees:

“O mother, if euer you did my deare father loue...” He echoes the ghost’s if thou didst ever thy dear father love... half-intentionally. If the ghost cannot speak to her, he will. He must.

“Forbeare the adulterous bed to night, And win your selfe by little as you may, In time it may be you wil lothe him quite: And mother, but assist mee in reuenge, And in his death your infamy shall die.”

The ghost asked him to leave her to heaven. He fears what her judgment might bring. He loves her. He needs her. He can’t do this alone. He’s so scared and he just wants his mother’s affirmation that everything will be alright, that she will support him, that somehow, their family can be saved. He knows he’s lying to himself, but he can’t stop.

They make eye contact. Gertrude takes a moment before nodding and longer before she speaks, but she agrees.

“Hamlet, I vow by that maiesty, That knowes our thoughts, and lookes into our hearts, I will conceale, consent, and doe my best, What stratagem soe're thou shalt deuise.”

She holds his hands for a while, but her eyes drift towards Polonius’s (Corambis’s ARGH) body and Hamlet, who was facing away from it, suddenly realizes what he’s done all over again. He scrambles to his feet and wraps it in the arras before frantically dragging it out of the room and off stage.

Gertrude doesn’t move. She sits on her bed, breathing heavily, her head still turned towards the door. The pause feels long and drawn out. Too long. She stands very suddenly and grabs a rug, placing it over the bloodstains on the floor. She hangs up the painting and as she’s centering it, Claudius enters.  (The Q1 cue is:  “Exit Hamlet with the dead body. Enter the King and Lordes.”  There is, notably, no exit cue for Gertrude. He comes to her, not the other way around.) She turns to face him. He greets her:

“Now Gertred, what sayes our sonne-”

He notices the blood on her dress. He looks down. The rug he’s standing on is soaking through with blood. 

“How... how doe you finde him?”

She stands with her back to the audience, facing him, hardly moving. The panic and shock and horror hit her all over again and she reveals all: 

“Alas my lord, as raging as the sea: Whenas he came, I first bespake him faire, But then he throwes and tosses me about, As one forgetting that I was his mother: At last I call'd for help: and as I cried, Corambis Call'd, which Hamlet no sooner heard, but whips me Out his rapier, and cries, a Rat, a Rat, and in his rage The good olde man he killes.”

What else is she supposed to do in her bloodstained dress, the carpet sticky with gore, and her portrait hung sideways on the wall? Something is rotten in the state of Denmark and Claudius can’t suspect it’s her. Not yet.

Shakespeare according to me

I'm not anglo, I learned about plays in Spanish in Spanish class. I've never seen a Shakespeare play. However due to the worldwide prevalence of anglo culture, I think I have a good grasp on what his plays are about. So I pulled a list and this is what I know of each for @aturinfortheworse

All's Well That Ends Well: Well, okay, I thought this was like a phrase said in a play, not the title of a play, I have no idea what happens in this one.

Antony and Cleopatra: Uh, this is about the romance of the title characters until Cleopatra's suicide. I don't think it's very historicaly accurate. As an aside, Cleopatra's death is a hot debated but afaik there's good reason to believe she was killed, rather than having commited suicide.

Comedy of Erros: I thought this was the name of a genre.

Hamlet: Hamlet is the Prince of Denmark who is back from college. His dad is dead and his uncle married his mom so now uncle is king. The ghost of his dad appears to Hamlet and tells him uncle killed him and Hamlet must avenge him. Hamlet struggles with what to do for too long, I think he kills a guy by accident, he could have killed his uncle at some point but didn't because he had just confessed and wouldn't go to hell. Ophelia is Hamlet's love interest and everyone treats her so poorly she goes mad (I think the guy Hamlet killed was her dad) and drowns herself either deliberately or passively. Alas, poor Yorick. To be or not to be. I now realize I have no idea how this ends, but it's a tragedy so maybe Hamlet dies???

Henry ???: This lists 7 plays named Henry, besides obviously being about kings all I know is that one of them references Pontious Pilate washing his hands because I talked with Ruin about that expression.

Julius Caesar: The Senate plots to kill Caesar, Brutus joins because he fears he may become a despot. Caesars ignores his wife's worries and other bad omens and goes out and gets stabbed. Et tu, Brute? Marcus Antonius gives a cool speech after and justice is served. I don't think this is very historically accurate and I'm sure this play is the only reason people on this site care about Caesar's death so much.

King Lear: A king distributes his kingdom between his dauthers and gives the best parts to the ungrateful, mean ones that suck up to him instead of the actually good daughter. Then the mean daughters treat him badly in his old age. Good daughter tries to help him. I think Lear dies???

Macbeth: I actually read a translation of this one, this one doesn't count.

Merchant of Venice: This one is where "Do we not bleed?" comes from, said by a Jewish merchant in reference to Jewish people being, well, people. You'd think this means the play is sympathetic to Jews, but the plot is actually about that merchant being The Worst, so uh, it's pretty anti-semitic.

Midsummer Night's Dream: Woman A and man B are in love, but A's dad wants her to marry man C, woman D is in love with C, but C loves A. Meanwhile the fairy King (Oberon) and Queen (Titania) are having marriage problems and the King decided to prank her by using a love potion to have her her fall in love with a dude whose head was turned into a donkey's (for some reason). While avoiding going to couple's councel he decides he might as well help A, B, C and D sort themselves, but there's a confusion and the love potions creates a perfect love square. Hilarity ensues until everything is sorted out and everyone is freed from the love spell, except C who is made to love D and uh... I think D should have the name of Twelfth's Night's protagonist. This all happens during midsummer.

Much Ado About Nothing: A man and a woman are forced to spend time together because their besties are in love. They claim to hate each other but are just really tsundere. There's a prince.

Othello: Othello is an affluent black man whom everyone loves, except this one guy who hates him because he's racist. He tricks Othello into killing his own wife (Desdemona).

Romeo and Juliet: Okay, I know the plot of this one. Everyone does. Yes, I know it in detail. Just trust me.

Taming of the Shrew: There's a woman no one likes because she has an attitude, a guys take one for the team and marries her so her younger sister that everyone loves will be available for marriage. The husband spends the entire play abusing his wife until she becomes perfectly obedient. I hope there's something I'm missing because what the actual fuck.

Tempest: A dude named Prospero (I think he used to be a king) was exiled with his daughter to an island for some reason. He learns to do magic. Prospero invokes a storm that makes the dude that exiled him (his brother? cousin?) who was passing by take refuge on his island. He has a plan to take revenge, but he also wants his daughter to marry the son of the guy who betrayed him?, so he pretends like he dissaproves of their romance because reverse psychology???? He has a fairy servant that he loves dearly named Ariel. There's also a guy named Caliban who was the original inhabitant of the island who is portrayed as a vicious svage and represents anti-colonialists natives, which is... yeah...

Titus Andronicus: They're romans. Idk what this is about but everyone dies horribly.

Twelfth Night: This is where the Anne Hathaway picture that all the bisexuals love comes from. A woman named Viola (me, a Spanish speaker: ಠಿ_ಠ) disguises herself as her twin brother for reasons (I think she thinks her brother is dead) and gets work under some rich dude and falls in love with him. Said dude is trying to court some rich lady and sends Viola to help him, rich lady falls in love with Viola instead, since she's pretending to be a man. Hilarity ensues. Then Viola's not-dead twin brother shows up and there's much confussion and more hilarity. Everything is sorted in the end and Viola gets to marry her boss and the rich lady settles for Viola's brother, because I guess she was into the pretty face and not the personality. This is where Optimus Prime gets the journey's end in lover's meeting quote I think. I guess it happens across 12 days???

As You Like It, Coriolanus, Cymbeline, King John, Love's Labour's Lost, Measure for Measure, Merry Wives of Windsor, Pericles, Richard II, Richard III, Timon of Athens, Troilus and Cressida, Two Gentlemen of Verona, Winter's Tale: I have never heard of this in my life.

Hello! So this may seem stupid but I want to ask if Beyond Evil's worth watching even if know who the killer is? The show's been on my watchlist but I accidentally learnt some major spoilers. So should I watch it even though the mystery is ruined for me? Thanks.

hi anon! sorry the mystery was ruined for you, especially since i think beyond evil is a show that's just best experienced blind.

but that said, i absolutely encourage you to watch it anyways. even if you've been spoiled, i do think you can still enjoy the show because the acting, writing, and insane chemistry between the cast members (particularly shin ha kyun and yeo jin goo) are just off-the-walls insane. it's so much better to experience exactly how the mystery unfolds before your eyes, even if you know who the ultimate killer is. (think of it this way: i mean, everyone knows how hamlet ends, right? or king lear or the percy jackson series or the planet of the apes or the lord of the rings or the hobbit or really any other well-loved story. but even if the ending has been around for a while, there's something very special about seeing it all come together before your eyes--and, depending on the genre, you'll either desperately hope for a happy ending or you'll find yourself wanting to comfort the currently sad characters because you know they'll be getting a happy ending eventually, so please hang in there, sad protagonist, it'll happen!)

also, just . . . you can't really get the core of the atmosphere of beyond evil from spoilers. while i wasn't spoiled about the main stuff in beyond evil, i actually was spoiled about one other thing, and even when it happened in the show, i found myself hit much harder by the event. i was also hit a lot harder by the scenes that i'd previously only seen in gifsets (some of which were the exact ones that made me interested in watching the show in the first place). you get music in the show, you hear the characters breathe, you hear the character's voices and you get a sense of their real desperation or anger or sadness, etc etc etc. things that, again, you wouldn't be able to experience through a written out spoiler.

so!!!! bottom line: yes, i highly recommend watching beyond evil, even if you were unfortunately spoiled. the show itself is very much so a work of art--and i guarantee that even if you've uncovered the mystery, you'll find that there are a million more reasons to enjoy the show.

happy watching!

Metryllis' Paladin Problems: Valentines by Volume

source : www . reddit . com/r/grandorder/comments/ey7s5b/metryllis_paladin_problems_valentines_by_volume/Commentary:

Just in time for the Month of Love. It’s something horrible!

I guess this is more of a Kiara’s Paladin Problems strip, but I’m on a roll with that “M” theme linking them all together.

Kiara's opening lines were inspired by lyrics from The Rocky Horror Picture Show track "Don't Dream It, Be It". Astolfo speaks for himself.

There’s a reason why only certain Servants (if any) are allowed to accompany you in Singularities/EoRs/Lostbelts. Some would resolve them too easily!

Yes, in addition to being a Prince and a Duke, Astolfo was a King of Lombardy as well!

Like the overview of Durandal’s ownership in a previous comic, Astolfo’s telling of his sordid saga is mostly without embellishments. It only omits that he only became friends with Giocondo (Jocundo, in some translations) when he heard that he was a man whose beauty rivaled his own. To see if the rumors were true, he invited him to his kingdom in Lombardy (Astolfo’s brother had recently died, leaving him to inherit it), but when Giocondo arrived, he was bedraggled and sallow. Astolfo’s would-be competition had recently chanced upon his wife in the arms of another man (a crucifix was involved). Later, through a crack in his guest room, Giocondo spied Astolfo’s queen having an affair with the aforementioned dwarf. And you know the rest. Oh, except the part where Astolfo and Giocondo gave Fiammetta and her third lover their blessing and a large dowry with which they could wed each other. Also, the little wrinkle that the entire tale might be completely fictitious. Even more so than usual, I mean.

Rodomonte, having had his fiancé choose Mandricardo over him, languishes in an inn and bemoans the supposed promiscuity of women, the innkeeper kindly tells him the story of Astolfo’s thousand THOT march to make him feel better. Ariosto, the writer, prefaces the story assuring the reader that it is nonsense and also very offensive and can be skipped. Not that this stopped me.

Of course, this allegedly improbably tale is told a few cantos before Astolfo goes to Hell, Heaven, Eden, and the Moon. Which actually happens. So the milli-mistress misadventure could have also been true.

It’s charming either way, I find. Astolfo is such a ridiculous character that people can just attribute all sorts of deranged deeds to his ledger and they’d suddenly become plausible by association.

After the story is told, some of the bar’s partrons agree with the sentiment that they must be wary of womanly wantonness. Others, surprisingly, side with the women and claim that men are just as likely to be unfaithful and they shouldn’t hold it against each other too brutally if infidelity should occur.

I must stress that whether you believe Astolfo’s story is about letting your freak flag fly or waving away loyalty lapses in non-open relationships, Ariosto has strong moral ideals on romance (even while putting Charlemagne’s own…wanderings…into consideration) to buoy all this crudeness. If not modern, then very far-reaching ones.

Bradamante and Ruggiero’s love, for how much trouble it gets them in and how Ariosto might have been playing to the vanity of his patrons (who believed themselves descended from the pair), is comprehensively portrayed as a very good and very beautiful thing in a tale rife with the mad and the macabre.

The hollowness of Ruggiero’s partially enchanted affair with Alcina regresses his reputable countenance into that of a placid imbecile who’s almost plantlike even before he’s turned into an actual tree.

Roland’s pursuit over a woman who does not love him, transforms him into a monster.

Doralice so swiftly switching affections for Mandricardo to his killer, Ruggiero is depicted negatively.

Paladin Rinaldo, a married man and Bradamante’s brother, temporarily redeems himself for his own pursuit of Angelica by leading the reinforcements he’d collected (a task he was penalized with by a disappointed Charlemagne) to save Paris, his king, and his fellow knights during a terrible siege. Then he greedily goes out to pursue Angelica again, this time under the pretense that he’s actually hunting down Gradasso and the stolen Durandal. He is repaid for his deception by a gorgon attack (yes, really) and his lack of effort in actually finding his purported targets leads to him missing the climactic 3-on-3 duel wherein Roland, Oliver, and Brandimart are grievously harmed by the blade he was supposed to retrieve.

But although Ariosto prizes Love and Loyalty, he’s as mentioned previously, very fond of Mercy. Princess Genevra of Scotland is accused of fornication and is to be sentenced to death. While she is eventually revealed to be innocent, that is a moot point for Rinaldo and her fiancé Ariodantes. Had she been guilty, the two of them would have still viewed her punishment as far too harsh and would have rushed to save her regardless. And they’d have succeeded in that scenario just the same.

Angelica, so frequently accosted and made captive, finds a man of sincere affection in the humble Medoro.

Proud Marfisa, finding the hamlet of the tyrant Marganor’s discarded and dishonored women, might have mocked them for allowing themselves to be victims, for not being as mighty, rich, and unstoppable as she. Instead, the glib cruelty of the Amazons and the vulnerable magnificence of Bradamante & Ruggiero’s bond have made her more worldly and considerate, and she stages a rebellion to not just punish Marganor but to reinstate his mistresses as full citizens of their home village worthy of sympathy, protection, and perhaps even true love rather than leave them ostracized for being made targets for wickedness they had little hope of defying on their own.

By the by, I hope you got a good laugh out of this comic. Cheers

Hi! i've read some of your writing tips on tragedy and redemption story and find them really helpful in my writing. May i ask for some regarding how to write a bittersweet story? like a tragedy but with a sprinkle of goodness that will be there to soften the blow but also make the tragedy sweeter and more painful? thanks in advance!

Aw thank you! Hmmmm.

Well, I’d say people tend to misinterpret bittersweet, because it was egregiously used to describe GoT’s ending--and while I don’t doubt ASOIAF (if we ever get them) will have a bittersweet ending, GoT’s ending was just straight up grimdark misery. Bittersweet is really about a mix of tragedy and hope. A personal journey may not end with the character alive, but their death is not pointless and their fight and journey mattered.

Think of Titanic: Jack dies, so he and Rose aren’t together in the end; however, his life (and yes, his death, but especially his way of life) gave Rose life. You’re left satisfied even if sad, because his wish for Rose to live for herself came true. Did Jack fall prey to his flaw of hopeless romanticism? Yes, arguably. Does that make it a negative thing? No. 

So I think there are three key elements: fairness to the characters, appreciation for the journey, and hope. I’ll ramble a lot so idk if I’m answering your question but I hope so.

First up, characters and fairness. This itself is twofold: it must be fair in framing and to the characters’ journeys thus far. By framing I mean the standards for all characters have to be the same, or the narrative has to at least be aware of double-standards and call those out. For example, in GoT, this fails because we were asked to hold Daenerys to a different standard than we were asked to hold Sansa or Arya (Daenerys was portrayed as always cold to her victims--when this is demonstrably not the case--while Arya and Sansa engaged in an equally if not more disturbing lack of empathy for their victims). Thus we can’t be happy that one person got a happy ending and another a tragic one, because there’s no sense to be made of it.

However, in AoT, Eren’s arc is pure Shakespearean tragedy, while the overall ending is bittersweet. The reason is that Reiner, Annie, and Eren were all held to account for genocide; Eren was offered redemption time and time and time again, and he refused to take it while Annie and Reiner did atone. Their motives weren’t always pure (whatever that means), but they fought to stop the killing while Eren took every effort to refuse to stop, even wiping his friends’ memories. But while Eren dies, he is still loved by his friends even if what he did does not get a pass. Eren’s choices though were ultimately pointless: his genocide solved nothing, and his friends are trying to untangle his mess.

Fairness, as I implied earlier, doesn’t mean every character gets the same ending. For example, in LOTR, Sam is able to marry Rosie and have many children after the war. But Frodo cannot. He is forever affected by his journey and chooses to go across the sea with the elves. This is true to both their characters’ strengths and flaws, and so the ending is bittersweet because they move on, but it fits for each of them. You have to frame characters as either tragic or not from the beginning. You cannot switch halfway; you can insert red herrings for sure, but the reader has to be able to look back and be like “ah.”

Romeo and Juliet is the most bittersweet of Shakespeare’s tragedies imo, because their love saves the city. It’s a tragedy for the characters personally because they had no need to die and their flaws led them to, but unlike in King Lear or Othello or Hamlet, it’s also a love story at its core, and loves renews and heals. In the other three, which are also awesome and in some ways arguably stronger thematically than R&J, the characters’ flaws swallow everything around them and everything they fought for. There is no justice at the end of Hamlet even if Fortinbras arrives to set the kingdom right; Othello only acts the way everyone cruelly suspected he would; Lear loses absolutely everything and the only happy thing that happens happens off-screen and might not have actually happened in the play and even Edgar taking the throne can’t erase the hell that just happened. He can’t even save Cordelia despite Edmund trying to redeem himself in his dying breath by warning Edgar. Anyways, R&J is in other ways like AoT: main heroes are tragic, but the overall ending is bittersweet.

Penny and Pyrrha’s arcs give RWBY’s a somewhat bittersweet feel, even if I think the overall end of RWBY will be more hopeful (I still suspect we have at least one major death left but not in the main eight/ten). But the point of their deaths isn’t that it was pointless and didn’t have to happen, nor is it that they were always doomed. IT is that they made their choices, and their choices should be honored and because of their choices, they live on even if they are no longer present. Their arcs are tragic but their flaws do not consume everything they stood for (in contrast to say Ironwood, who dies crushed by the city he wanted to save and whose downfall he instigated).

I’ve seen people saying that because their friends are traumatized, it’s negatively framed, but I don’t agree. Penny’s death is going to traumatize her friends because her life mattered. She mattered.  But just because she is dead and chose to die on her terms doesn’t make it a negatively-framed suicide as opposed to a heroic sacrifice. Same with Pyrrha, who was very uncomfortable when asked to be a maiden, followed orders of adults, and in the end chose to fight Cinder as if she was a maiden despite having no powers and knowing she would almost certainly die fighting Cinder. Their loved ones do mourn them, but their sacrifices aren’t pointless, as Penny saves Winter’s life and many of her people’s, and Pyrrha is deeply remembered and honored by her family and village. But beyond what they do for other people, their sacrificial choices matter for their own arcs. Is it unfair they died? Yes. Absolutely. It’s wrong. It’s tragic. But the sweet comfort from it is that they both died knowing their lives had purpose and died in ways that defined who they were as people. Yet it’s also true their deaths were connected to their flaws--Penny’s struggles with self-worth and Pyrrha’s need to be the hero--but it wasn’t like them losing everything to their flaws like Ironwood gave up everything for fear and control, or Eren same deal, or Sauron. Lol.

So uhhh after all those rambles I’d say just know the theme of your story and know your characters and what you want their legacy to be.

I don't think I've asked this of you before... Hamlet's very first line is "A little more than kin, and less than kind." In several editions, this line is marked "Aside," and indeed, I've often seen it performed that way (e.g. Branagh's film). But I've long believed that Hamlet seems so proud of his skills at wordplay, that it seems unlikely that he would "throw away" such a juicy line. What are your thoughts? Secret aside, or public snark?

Hello @corybanter! Good to hear from you again. 

I’m at risk of always answering similarly in saying that part of what I love about Shakespeare is the way multiple possibilities can exist at once while it’s on the page, even if an active choice needs to be made when putting anything on stage. I guess there’s a reason I’m a literary critic rather than a director. 

So the fastest answer is that the line works either way, and that both interpretations are convincing in their own way. 

In support of the idea that it’s an aside is the fact that Claudius’ line works very well as if he had never been interrupted. If Hamlet’s line weren’t there, the king’s speech would read:

But now, my cousin Hamlet, and my son. (punctuation is ! in F)... How is it that the clouds still hang on you? (1.2.64-66)

And that’s a perfectly plausible continuation if he hadn’t noticed that Hamlet had said anything. I suppose the Folio’s more emphatic ending of the previous line with the exclamation mark could suggest more of a proper end to the previous speech. But the exclamation mark in early modern writing doesn’t necessarily indicate the end of a sentence, and didn’t even need to be followed by a capital letter, so that’s not conclusive.

The other point in support of the aside is that Hamlet doesn’t actively address Claudius unlike in his next line, when he says, ‘Not so, my lord, I am too much i’the’ sun’ (1.2.67). In this less directly barbed double entendre, it’s evident that he addresses Claudius directly. Even with all his snark, Hamlet doesn’t drop court formalities and calls him ‘my lord’ (not surprising given that he regards rank quite seriously for most of the play).

Theatrically speaking, there might be a benefit in presenting this line as an aside, since it would introduce Hamlet in his very first line as a private introvert. It separates him from the rest of the group not just in the colour of his clothes but in his thoughts, and indicates immediately the double meaning of his words. 

Of course, there’s also the possibility that Hamlet is audibly talking to himself or that Claudius ignores Hamlet’s remark. Given the baffling nature of his line (hard to get the exact moment if someone said it to you in passing), a confused and somewhat thrown Claudius is perfectly imaginable, and would also explain why he goes on as if nothing had been said. In support of the idea that Claudius hears it is its very opacity: Hamlet can say what he says without any worry that he’ll be understood, and since the words themselves do the job at hiding his meaning, it doesn’t need to be an aside as well. 

Your point about Hamlet’s pride in wordplay is a good one too. It’s true that in later scenes he relishes talking to Polonius and leading him in circles. Though Hamlet’s wordplay isn’t underpinned by any specific moral feeling, part of it comes from the sources where Amleth doesn’t like to be untruthful, and therefore speaks the truth in veiled and misleading ways so as not to lie. But Hamlet often says more than he needs to say, and, as you point out, seems to revel in wordplay for its own sake. Still, Hamlet is perfectly capable of using some of his best lines in soliloquy, so perhaps the idea that he wouldn’t waste such a juicy line doesn’t preclude the possibility that he’s talking to himself. 

I’m happy to see this line performed either way. And I think it does depend on what kind of Hamlet one wishes to present. If the focus is on the social outcast, the aside makes a lot of sense. If the focus is on the witty wordsmith, then he should speak it aloud. I personally like my Hamlet sharp, sarcastic and amusing in the presence of others, but I wouldn’t go to see Hamlet if they were all performed the same way. 

MONTHLY MEDIA: April 2021

Still staying indoors so lots of time to read and watch stuff and play games. Here’s how I spent the month!

……….FILM……….

Mortal Kombat (2021) Should Cole’s arcana have been to summon his ancestor and become Scorpion 2.0? Yes. Should a fight over a pit of spikes end in a character dying on those spikes? Yes. Should they be pushing other films out of the way to make this sequel? 100% yes. I had low expectations, high hopes, and a great time. 10/10 would watch again right now.

Swiss Army Man (2016) So I knew Paul Dano would use Daniel Radcliffe’s dead body as a jetski and I thought that prepared me for the sort of film we’d be watching. I was wrong. It changed tones so smoothly and I appreciate how much it kept you on your toes. I never really knew what to expect (both from the actors and the story). Really really great.

Moxie (2021) I spent the first 30 minutes trying to place Claudia, the best friend, and then I realized she was from the Hawaiian season of Terrace House! Very cool. The movie felt like a decent intro to feminism and for that, I can only hope there are folks out there watching this and considering some of its messages.

……….TELEVISION……….

Superstore (Episode 1.01 to 3.09) I think we watched a few episodes before April but it wasn’t really hooking me and I completely forgot to talk about it. Now, three seasons in, I’m digging it a lot more. They’re giving Sandra more of a personality and I never really liked the early jokes that made her the butt of the joke, so that’s a big plus. It’s really growing on me.

Falcon & the Winter Soldier (Episode 1.01 to 1.06) So pretty good! I tend to prefer the more fantastical corners of the Marvel universe but this had a lot of great moments. Though I think that’s what didn’t work for me: it was a lot of great segments but the series as a whole never quite came together. Maybe too many plates to keep spinning?

The Great British Bake Off (Episode 9.01 to 9.10) After rather unexpectedly losing our cat, this was the sort of good-natured, well-meaning series we needed. Low-stakes (though high while watching) and I really love reality tv that doesn’t require a villain or conflict; it simply celebrates passion and trying!

……….READING……….

The Road to Oz by L Frank Baum (Complete) I’m continuing my trek through the series and this one dipped a little for me. I think a mostly human cast (even with two characters’ heads transformed into animals) doesn’t feel quite as whimsical as the other entries. Dorothy and the Wizard in Oz had the same issue. It’s fun that most of the book is spent GETTING to Oz and there are lots of weird antagonists, but the main cast is just meh.

The Emerald City of Oz by L Frank Baum (Complete) Another mostly human cast but Dorothy spends a lot of time on her own and it has a very Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland vibe to me. Lots of weird characters and the B plot following the antagonists is fun; the Nomes are always a good time. It’s wild to think this was planned to be the last book (and it definitely reads that way) especially knowing how many more there are in the series.

The Patchwork Girl of Oz by L Frank Baum (Complete) I’m glad we’re getting back into weird characters and a (albeit meandering) plot! I’m also noticing that a lot of the book is dedicated to introducing characters to each other. It’s an interesting way to either pad the text or really hammer in the canon through repetition.

Tik-Tok of Oz by L. Frank Baum (Complete) By now, the format is firmly established (human child meets a group of colorful characters and they go on an adventure) so now I’m really looking to see how each one stands apart. Great to have the Nome King return as a villain but Betsy Bobbin really does just feel like a Dorothy clone. Am I being too critical of a children’s book? Maybe this is a sign I should take a break from Oz.

……….AUDIO……….

Second Star to the Right (Podcast) Also a Twitch stream! It’s an actual play of Dungeons & Dragons using my Neverland Setting and it’s been a lot of fun hearing how others use the resource! The cast seems to gel really well and their characters are a fun mix that contrast the setting. I’m keen to see where it all goes!

……….GAMING……….

Neverland: A Fantasy Role-Playing Setting (Andrews McMeel Publishing) The group made (and then lost) a new Pirate friend and are currently dealing with a resurgence in Giant activity (the Gnome hamlet is under attack)! Further session breakdowns are over here on Reddit!

And that’s it! As always, let me know if you have anything you recommend and happy Friday!

Kul Tiran Backing

A puddle broke beneath the soles of the Director's boots as she journeyed through the rain across the city of Boralus. Eyes swept across open streets from beneath the hood of the long coat, drops of water cascading off to the sides. The amount of rainfall here stirred up memories of her Gilnean childhood for only a minute before she shifted focus to the upcoming meeting.

"I don't think I've ever seen you nervous," Alyssa chimed across the telepathic link. "Anxious, sure. But nervous—"

"Are you making a point here, or?" Kat interrupted.

"No. Just curious. Why does she make you nervous and not anyone else?"

"It's not her. It's the topic at hand. Doing this puts an unnecessary risk on other financial ventures and our relation, should she decline. Yet, I'm left with little other options to seek funding." Kat admitted as the office came into view across the plaza.

"There's also the matter of what I plan to do. Pad her funding line with my own coin to avoid potential investigations into my financials. She won't like it, I know. To keep that behind her back creates more risk while revealing the matter could turn her away."

"Well, if she doesn't need to know, then why risk it? What she doesn't know won't hurt her." The dagger-bound woman practically shrugged in her tone.

"It could hurt us both. I'll consider your point," Kat sneered.

Drowning out the warlocks reply, she swung the office door open, the bell above the frame emitting the soft chime throughout the space, announcing Kat's arrival to the noblewoman seated at the desk. Pulling back the soaked hood with a smile, the pair commenced with the standard pleasantries. An informal greeting, inquiring on one another's state of wellbeing, and a brief catch-up of the recent Scourge invasion.

"My family is all well and safe, and Stormhollow did not suffer the Scourge. I would consider things well and good." Lady Stalsworth answered as she eased back into the seat, following their courteous handshake.

"Glad t'hear," Kat nodded, swinging one knee over the other as she dropped into the adjacent chair. "Gransonee was spared from the dead risin' again as well. So, no effect on our current arrangements as it stands." She paused for a moment. "Unless, of course, ya' wish fer changes?"

"Unless there are reasons why I should wish for changes, I see no need. Do you?"

The Director shook her head slowly. "None wot-so-eva. Th' profit flows, th' people are happy, and the hamlet has been able t'repair and expand some infrastructure. Most importantly, it keeps Jasper out of m'ear."

Elaianna chuckled in a breath, a faint smile touching the corner of her lips. "You did not write to me about our current business affairs, but rather, a new one if I am to understand your letter correctly?"

The pleasantries were dismissed. Both women preferred to discuss business over the former at every meeting.

"That is correct, yes. While this proposal is of another nature, it bears no effect on the current trade agreemen'." Kat cleared her throat, ignoring a comment from Alyssa as she pulled a ledger from the coat. "I'm sure yer aware of th' current state of the Kingdom, yes?"

"Presuming you mean things such as the King's absence and an ill-chosen replacement on the throne in the meantime? Yes. I cannot say things are any better here, as the Lord Admiral has also gone missing."

"I was referin' more t'the current economic situations." The Director clarified, collecting her hands upon the leather cover of the ledger.

"Aye," the Lady dipped her head in a shallow nod. "Such things come with recent events."

"More-so when on th' tailwinds of a long and costly war," Kat added. "Stormwind is, well t'be blunt, fractured. Th' military cutbacks, coffers empty...surely ya' know wot follows there. Taxes and overexertion. Th' nobles houses are all in a tiff, vyin' fer favors and agreements in exchange fer gold. Sharks, th' lot of 'em."

"I am an affluent woman, but I cannot cease an entire kingdom from going into taxation," Elaianna remarked, weaving her fingers together and studying the Director. "So what favor and agreement are you looking for?"

Kat quickly wet her lips, knowing her discomfort in this proposal was visible to a small degree, and while the dagger-bound woman was silent, Kat knew she was listening. Without further delay, she promptly opened the ledger to her Unit's budget and slid it across to Elaianna.

"I do no' have th' time or patience t'lobby the houses while they are in congress fer fundin', nor would I likely care for th' things they ask in exchange. My Unit is internal affairs, we are no' combat facin', but many believe wot we do is of little value."

"What -do- you do? Especially in times post-war?" Lady Stalsworth inquired, glancing over the ledger.

"Th' same as we would durin' war. We handle issues that extend beyond th' capabilities of the guards; serial killin's, drug cartels, slave rings, th' occasional cults." Kat picked at her nails in her lap, out of the other's view.

"Our latest project has no' been well received by m'peers, and I narrowly dodged havin' the Unit axed with my proposal. With the right resources and time, we could document and categorize these dangerous people's thought processes and mental states. Study them, if you will, and create a possible method t'detect these behaviors before they manifest into somethin' larger. However, with no fundin' or resources, I canno' produce the results needed to keep my Unit from disbandment."

"And you're looking for..." Elaianna asked as she found no estimated total within the ledger.

"Wot eva yer willin' t'give." Kat answered plainly. "I hate t'even ask at all, given our current professional relationship. And I certainly do no' expect charity either."

The Lady nodded again, motioning toward the Director. "Would monthly increments be of use, or were you hoping for a singular lump sum?

"Monthly would be ideal, luv'. A lump sum may create too much of a surplus that others may try to pillage."

"I can commit to supporting your Unit on a monthly basis." Elaianna pushed the ledger back across the desk with her answer.

Inquisitively, Kat stared and collected the ledger, returning the book to her coat as she hesitantly asked, "And in return?"

With a simple shrug, the Lady answered, "I would ask what I would hope you would already do. If you happen upon any knowledge of a threat to Stormhollow or my family, you will let me know so that we might protect our people and ourselves."

A soft hum rattled with Kat's throat. This was something she would have done already, yes. But while Elaianna had never given her a reason to be mistrusted, Kat struggled to believe one would ask only this in return for funding. A thought that Alyssa did little to dismiss.

"That I would already do, yes. Though I will add that if ya' have an issue within Stormhollow that falls within wot m' Unit handles, I would be more than happy t'direct focus there until the matter is resolved."

"Thank you."

Kat lifted her hand, "it is I who owes ya' thanks, twice over."

"Then let us call it a deal." Elaianna smiled, extending her hand over the desk to cement the agreement.

Now at the crossroad of revealing or secreting her intend, Kat's conflicting thoughts churned again as she eyed the offered hand. Forcing her way through, she began to reach but recoiled at the last second.

"Don't do it," Alyssa argued to no avail.

"There is one more thing," Kat muttered, clearing her throat.

"I will pull funds from my personal accounts, those undocumented linked to Gransonee. Doin' so on m'own would draw attention and force m'hand into revealin' th' island and hamlet publicly, which would then force a pledge to the Alliance or vassalage t' a noble house. Against the wishes of its people. I will hide th' funds I sent in the same ledger line as yer own." The Director admitted, letting out a heavy breath as if a weight had been lifted.

"I wanted ya' t'know, rather than keep it hidden from ya' and risk an auditory blowback."

Immediately, Elaianna's lips pursed, and a low hum vibrated behind the displeased expression as the offered hand was withdrawn. The silence which followed lingered uncomfortably between them for a solid minute as Kat held her breath and avoided the Lady's gaze.

"I suspect such will not pose a problem," Elaianna finally spoke, "as it is assisting the Kingdom."

Kat's shoulders dropped as she relaxed and let out her breath.

"I wanted t'be honest and transparent in m'intentions than lead ya' blind and risk everythin'."

"I appreciate that," The Lady smiled faintly. "Thank you."

"Th' consequences will be mine, and only mine t'bear should anythin' happen." Kat offered her hand to complete the transaction with a nod, relieved when Elaianna nodded and took the hand in a firm shake.

"Let us hope such things do not come to be."

Standing to exit, Kat fixed the position of her coat, which had shifted slightly while seated. The hood remained down, as the sound of rainfall beyond the door had ceased during their exchange.

"Light and Shadow keep ya' and yer family, Lady Stalsworth."

"Tides guide you and yours, Lady Hawke."

Resisting the urge to correct and discourage using such a title, Kat resigned to dipping her head and turning towards the door. Quickly leaving the office and taking in the scent of the city after the rain. She knew Alyssa overheard every word and would likely inquire on details but cut the inquisitive warlock off before she had a chance.

"Another time," Kat implored, "I promise. Just give me time."

[ @elaianna, @alyssa-ward​ ]

[ Relevant: @tristanasneak, @jocelyn-wellson, @myzariel, @nikkithorpe, @lovelydeadlysocialite, @quinn-varden ]

When I was revisiting 3 Henry VI a few days ago to prepare the scene-by-scene for Social Shakespeare, this passage from scene II.vi jumped out at me:

I’m used to the soul being matter-of-factly “she” in some languages with grammatical gender, but this feels marked in my English. It’s the sort of thing I might sometimes deliberately do in poetry for a particular kind of effect. I got curious: how often does Shakespeare do it?

I did a quick keyword search on Open Source Shakespeare and skimmed the results for cases of a character’s soul being referred to with 3rd-person pronouns. I found 17 instances across his works: 8 where the soul is “she”, 9 where the soul is “it”. That’s not a huge dataset, but still kind of cool that it’s almost an even split. Usage varies within the same play, and even within the same scene! Also worth noting that all 17 instances were in versified dialogue. The two options seem to coexist fluidly in roughly the same register.

Full set of instances under the cut. Text copied as it appears in the Open Source Shakespeare corpus (but I cross-referenced Folger to get scene-specific line numbers for the plays).

Hamlet, II.ii.578-84: Is it not monstrous that this player here, But in a fiction, in a dream of passion, Could force his soul so to his own conceit That, from her working, all his visage wann'd, Tears in his eyes, distraction in's aspect, A broken voice, and his whole function suiting With forms to his conceit? And all for nothing!

Hamlet, III.ii.67-9: Since my dear soul was mistress of her choice And could of men distinguish, her election Hath seal'd thee for herself.

Hamlet, III.iii.98-100: Then trip him, that his heels may kick at heaven, And that his soul may be as damn'd and black As hell, whereto it goes.

2 Henry VI, III.ii.406-14: Here could I breathe my soul into the air, As mild and gentle as the cradle-babe Dying with mother's dug between its lips: Where, from thy sight, I should be raging mad, And cry out for thee to close up mine eyes, To have thee with thy lips to stop my mouth; So shouldst thou either turn my flying soul, Or I should breathe it so into thy body, And then it lived in sweet Elysium.

3 Henry VI, II.i.74-6: Now my soul's palace is become a prison: Ah, would she break from hence, that this my body Might in the ground be closed up in rest!

3 Henry VI, II.vi.41: [Clifford groans, and dies] Whose soul is that which takes her heavy leave?

King John, III.iii.20-6: Come hither, Hubert. O my gentle Hubert, We owe thee much! within this wall of flesh There is a soul counts thee her creditor And with advantage means to pay thy love: And my good friend, thy voluntary oath Lives in this bosom, dearly cherished.

King John, V.vii.30-1: Ay, marry, now my soul hath elbow-room; It would not out at windows nor at doors.

King John, V.vii.76-7: And then my soul shall wait on thee to heaven, As it on earth hath been thy servant still.

The Merchant of Venice, IV.i.135-40: …thy currish spirit Govern'd a wolf, who, hang'd for human slaughter, Even from the gallows did his fell soul fleet, And, whilst thou lay'st in thy unhallow'd dam, Infused itself in thee; for thy desires Are wolvish, bloody, starved and ravenous.

Othello, II.i.206-9: …I fear, My soul hath her content so absolute That not another comfort like to this Succeeds in unknown fate.

Othello, V.ii.325-6: This look of thine will hurl my soul from heaven, And fiends will snatch at it.

The Rape of Lucrece, 1218-20: Ay me! the bark peel'd from the lofty pine, His leaves will wither and his sap decay; So must my soul, her bark being peel'd away.

The Rape of Lucrece, 1774-80: Even here she sheathed in her harmless breast A harmful knife, that thence her soul unsheathed: That blow did that it from the deep unrest Of that polluted prison where it breathed: Her contrite sighs unto the clouds bequeath'd Her winged sprite, and through her wounds doth fly Life's lasting date from cancell'd destiny.

Richard II, II.ii.10-3: Some unborn sorrow, ripe in fortune's womb, Is coming towards me, and my inward soul With nothing trembles: at some thing it grieves, More than with parting from my lord the king.

Richard II, II.ii.67-9: Now hath my soul brought forth her prodigy, And I, a gasping new-deliver'd mother, Have woe to woe, sorrow to sorrow join'd.

Richard III, I.iv.37-40: Methought I had; and often did I strive To yield the ghost: but still the envious flood Kept in my soul, and would not let it forth To seek the empty, vast and wandering air…

The Lion King (Hitoshi x Reader Fluff)

A/N sorry this is short I just did not have any more ideas

"It's my favorite movie, if I'm being honest. I'm disappointed that I couldn't get a role in the play. I've watched it over a hundred and fifty times, and that's not an exaggeration. Well, a few of the parts were pretty different from the movie, and I would have had to sing, so..." He said, laughing, as if he was admitting something embarrassing, holding his neck. You loved it when he did that. It was such a cute pose for him. Your class was doing a play for the School Festival. Since another class, class 1-B, perhaps? You were not sure. They were doing Hamlet or Romeo and Juliet, a Shakespeare play, your class wanted to do a more lighthearted play. The Lion King, to be more precise. You did not get a role either, like Hitoshi, so the two of you had to dress up as Simba and Nala, the main characters, and pose with little kids. "It's just a distraction, though, on my goal to try and get into the hero corse and become a hero." His expression hardened. Hitoshi did not really have any friends in the school, but two teachers, Mic and Aizawa seemed to be nearly friends with him. If you could show him you were friend material (or perhaps a bit more), you would have not only him, but also two teachers on your side.

His expression softened whenever the kids came to take pictures with him dressed up in a costume as Simba, the cute lion cub. One of the kids remarked, "I like ya kicks, Simba!" You had never seen him like that before, his grin from ear to ear. "You like them? They're new." Your heart melted. He was so cute with them. Hitoshi was so good with the children, being kind and only growling slightly when they pulled on his ears. It was not a very exciting job to have, but at least it gave you an excuse to be with your crush for a little bit. Your other classmates were rehearsing or selling tickets with Present Mic, who was doing a very good job of yelling at the customers to come see the presentation.

"You look good in that," Hitoshi said, matter of factly. You look around. There was no one else, not even a child. "You mean me?" You asked unironically, pointing to yourself with a confused expression. He laughed. "Of course. You look so cute, kitty." You hoped he could not see you blush under the makeup you had to put on. Had he called you kitty on accident, or was it because you were wearing a large cat costume? That was a pet name, right? Your crush had just came up with a nickname for you! You were so busy thinking about that, a tiny boy came over to you with his mom and sister. The mom snapped a picture of the four of you, the flash taking you out of your daze. "Hey, why don't you two kiss? Aren't you supposed to be in love?" The kid says. You pause, unsure what to do, laugh at the mom slightly, but when she does not do anything, you bend down to level with the kid. "You're right, Simba and Nala are in love, but they're lions, and lions don't kiss." The kid looked like he was going to start bawling. "Mommy! It's a lie, the lions aren't in love. I'm going to tell my friends that class 1-C's play is terrible." You were not even supposed to have to be an actor. You sighed. "Ok, ok. Come on, I can get you a toy from the souvenir stand, will that help?" You said. He shook his head no. His sister seemed sad too. "Come on, we have to do something," Hitoshi whispered. "We can't have a kid crying before the play has even started," You sighed, out of ideas. "I'll do it," Hitoshi said gruffly. "Do what?" Before you knew what was happening, he nuzzles your face gently, not enough to mess with the makeup, and leaves you blushing. The close contact with you ended too quickly. You touched the spot where his breath went over you. "Oh, guess they're cool. Come on, Shiro! Let's go," the little boy sped off with his sister. Was Hitoshi hitting on you? He had complimented your looks and had just been up in your face. He did not even ask. Did he know you had a crush on him as well? Hitoshi waved at the siblings as they went into the distance, then turned to look at you.

"I'm sorry if I didn't respect your personal space. I did not mean to violate your space. I should have asked first. It's whatever, though, right? It's in the past, and you have to leave the past behind you." He shoved his hands into his pockets, looking nervous. You waved your hands at him, trying to express how you felt. "Oh, no, it was great. I mean, oh it's okay. It's fine." Oops. You looked down at your feet. It was great? Why did you say that? What did that even mean? He nodded, and went back to what he was doing, satisfied with your answer. When the play was over, Hitoshi started to take off the costume. You watched, assuming that he had a shirt or hoodie underneath. Seeing his bare chest made you realize this was not the case, and you panicked and turned away to respect his privacy. "Hitoshi, a bit of a warning next time before you strip, please!" You said. He just chuckled. "I still have my pants on, so why's it matter?" Your face got red with the possibility of seeing him without a shirt. No. No. No. You told yourself. You did not want to be seen as a pervert in Hitoshi's book. You were not peeking. As he left, he had put on a black hoodie and pulled the hoodie over his head.

You went around, helping other classes take down their decorations from the festival. Your one chance to do something with Hitoshi, and you had acted uninterested, even when he made physical contact with your face. Like a kiss. Well, there's always later, right? You could try talking to him or class, if you somehow got the courage of a lion. Or next year. Unless he joins the hero course... maybe you should make your move sooner rather than later.

((I think the most frustrating part of watching people analyze the actions of characters in vol8 is that the biggest complaint is that logic is thrown out the window and I would argue that’s the point. Especially because of the perspective of the show. I really hate to keep picking on Ironwood, Qrow, and RWBY, but those characters are the ones driving the plot, so I guess we gotta.

Lets start with RWBY. They’re kids first off. WBY are all about 19-20 years old and Ruby is 17. Lets start off by saying those are ages not exactly known for smart, long term decision making. Most people that age are trying to figure out what they want to do for the rest of their lives, struggling with college, dates, drinking, sex for the first time. They’re stumbling around in adult bodies while still having more or less the mind of a teenager because society has suddenly stopped treating them like a kid and expects them to be an adult. Except instead of having to struggle with decisions about their near future, RWBY is being asked to save the world. If you think you could handle that pressure well at 17-19, you’re lying. 

Does it make their decisions right though? No. The way they treated Ozpin for hiding the worst of his abuse and the fact that his ex-wife was an insane bitch who is functionally immortal is wrong. But again, I ask you, could you handle having all that dumped into your lap in an already stressful situation? The person who should be (and rightly is) condemned for his reaction is Qrow for throwing a punch. No matter how upset you are no hitting. Once you throw a punch in that situation, you’re the bad guy. And until he makes an effort of an apology he’s the bad guy in that situation. 

The biggest problem that team RWBY has is that all of their terrible decisions throughout the show have either been rewarded, or the got bailed out from having to see the real consequences. 

Ozpin allowed Blake to hide her White Fang past and therefore missed the least subtle component of the Fall of Beacon. Things could have been significantly less bad if he’d known about their involvement and was able to send Qrow in to spy on their operations. Maybe he could have figured out what Roman or Adam was up to, realized they were working for Cinder and by extension Salem.

Ozpin allowed team RWBY to do a mission that was a couple grades too advanced for them because he knew they’d break the rules otherwise. That was a tacit acknowledgement that he thought whatever they were up to was alright, and that they had his blessings on whatever it was that they wanted to do.

The best example of terrible decision after terrible decision that RWBYJNR makes is Argus. They have no idea how they’re getting the Relic to Atlas, and they seem road blocked. Jaune suggests stealing an airship, and Qrow, the adult in the room tells them that this is a bad idea, and if it goes bad it has the potential to screw up their entire life. He’s right. The problem is that he’d run off on his bender, and therefore the kids, and we in the audience, are supposed to see this as an unreasonable suggestion. 

However, it plays out as him being right. The incredibly complicated plan did go wrong. Now, they had no reason to suspect at the time that Adam was stalking Blake at the time (and I could go into why thats perfectly ic for him at another date), but there were a lot of moving parts in this plan and literally any of them could have broken. Everything that happened after they put this plan into motion was reactionary. Cordovan, obsessed with showing the Might of Atlas (TM), jumped into the mech suit. At that point, Ruby didnt really have a choice of not breaking it. But the ensuing fight created enough general unease that it summoned a Grimm hoard.

By rights, Argus should have fallen because of their bad decisions and in spire of their best efforts. Instead, Cordovan had a change of heart at the last moment and bailed them out.

This just reinforced the flawed idea that RWBY is always in the right and directly lead to s7′s climax. They are the unstoppable force.

Now you have Ironwood, quite literally the unmovable object, which I now realize is sort of his name. Ha.

Ironwood’s behavior does not come out of nowhere. Since his appearance, he’s had problem stamped all over him. He showed up with an entire goddamn army to a supposedly peaceful event that is to promote unity and the excellence of each kingdom. His rationale is that the people are going to be impressed with his big guns and feel safe. Ozpin gently points out that those big guns also signal to people that there is something out there that those big guns are designed to shoot. 

If its not a Grimm, could it mean that Atlas intends to shoot people?

Remember we’re not even 100 years out from the last World War, one that was basically started by Atlas. People are nervous. There are still grandparents and great grandparents alive today that were kids when the Great War was happening. Not only that but we’re also made aware that Atlas has rolled in the apolitical protectors of the people, the Huntsmen, into its military. This elite fighting force that is basically above the law and can go to any country in the world whenever they want, is now part of the military. The ONLY standing military that Remnant seems to have.

All of this has obviously caused friction in the Inner Circle. Qrow is not quite and never has been quiet about his disdain for James’ heavy handed techniques. Glynda calls James’ actions a dick measuring competition, and Ozpin was trying to be gentle about it, but he was clearly telling Ironwood to get his army off his fucking front lawn. And what did Ironwood do? He’d gone around Ozpin and talked to the Vale council.  They were threatening to remove Oz fro his position because they agreed with Ironwood: he was being too passive. Ironwood even tells Glynda that he cant believe that a man he trusted for so long would just sit by and stand to the side instead of meeting the problem head on. He didnt seem to understand why Qrow would want to go gather intelligence on an operation before sending in the big guns. 

Ironwood has never been a man to put a well thought out plan with all his ducks in a row into motion. This is a man who plows through opposition at every opportunity.

And when we see him again, we can see him steamrolling through opposition again. Somehow he got himself two seats on the council. That gives him an enormous amount of power. And his position as general means that at any point he can declare an emergency and become the de facto dictator of Atlas if he deems it fit. The problem is that he’s having these arguments against Jacques Schnee a man that the audience rightly hates, so he seems reasonable. Who gives a fuck about Jacques loosing business, he’s a dickhead. We’re not noticing the fact that James is consolidating power, or that he’s using that power to make unilateral decisions with no one telling him no.

There’s no one left in the room who is able or willing to tell him that these are bad ideas, that there will be consequences that he cant foresee. His  bullish behavior lead to both Robyn Hill and Jacques Schnee running for an empty council seat, and that created the environment that we walked into in s7.

Now, not all James’ ideas are bad. The Amity Project is actually a really good one, and James is right in wanting to keep it from the general public until its near completion. But you know who should have known? The other fucking council members. Probably the candidates. Playing your cards too close to the chest when you clearly need help and allies is a bad thing. But again, James didnt even trust Ozpin to be able to run his own kingdom, so durr hurr of course he’s the only one who can take care of Amity. And run a kingdom. And run an academy. And protect an ageing, ailing Maiden. And of course he doesnt have time to treat his horrific PTSD from the Fall of Beacon.

So when things go tits up because again, of course they will with a plan that complex James Ironwood doubles the fuck down on his terrible solo decision making. Clearly, non of this is his fault. No one is listening to him. He cannot trust others to make decisions so he’s going to make all of them. There’s no one around him to tell him no, especially because the first person that tried was publicly executed. 

James is scared. He’s had a mental break because of that fear. His paranoia, his PTSD, and the fact that there’s nothing there to help him back to stability means that he’s just going to be bouncing from one terrible choice to the next. He’s Hamlet in the throes of paranoia, heading down a road that is going to get everyone, including himself killed. He is King Lear as the world crumbles around him, acting cruel and making unreasonable, horrible demands of those around him. 

Working with Watts seems like an absolutely terrible idea, but to someone who thinks that he is in control of the situation because he has to be in order to keep functioning, there’s no way that this can bite him in the ass. For James, if no one is willing to follow his orders, he’s going to make them. This attitude is probably exactly why Watts did what he did and joined Salem in the first place. 

So when you combine the unstoppable force of Team RWBY, who’s been told they’re the child saviors of the world, and who’ve been either rewarded or bailed out of their bad decisions against the immovable object of Ironwood and his absolute conviction in himself, you have the mess Atlas is in now.

Honestly I find it kind of brilliant. 

Hii i have like the start of an idea for a fantasy Hamlet retelling and thinking about it automatically made me think of you and darkling (which I absolutely love), so i was wondering if you had any tips?

first of all. 😳thank you 🥺

second of all!! i am not an expert by any means, but i do read a lot of retellings (particularly shakespeare) and i also write them like you’ve said! so! i do have some thoughts!

[obligatory disclaimer: your mileage may vary. i am not a professional; i am just a bitch with adhd who thinks about writing and shakespeare an awful lot. the opinions expressed in this post are mine and i don’t intend to shove them down anyone’s throat and please don’t call me out for cyberbullying any authors because i’m vaguely about to do just that.]

i think, boiled down to its core, my advice would be: the heart of the story is what matters. and you can do whatever you want with everything else.

just yesterday, i finished watching “twelfth grade (or whatever),” which is a youtube webseries retelling of twelfth night, set in the modern day. there are multiple plot/character elements that were changed (everything from “x character is now nonbinary” to changing some endgame romantic relationships). yet, in my opinion, it was still a wonderful adaptation, because it struck at the character dynamics that make twelfth night work! plus it was just... so much fun. as a comedy should be. (of course i have my gripes, but i have my gripes about everything.)

what i’m saying is it’s all right to shift things around. it’s all right to change characters and settings and plotlines and endings. in fact, i personally find retellings more fun when they don’t stick to the original story on a one-to-one level. my favorite king lear retelling is set on a midwestern farm in the 1970s; my favorite macbeth retelling is set at a modern private school. my favorite hamlet retelling is... well, i guess it’s rosencrantz and guildenstern are dead, but if we’re talking out-of-the-box adaptations that more than fits the bill.

the thing is that you can change whatever you want. that’s the point of a retelling. in my experience, what makes the retelling work will have far less to do with the plot (and even the end!) and far more to do with the core of the story. let me get on my shouting-about-books soapbox for a moment and take a (relevant i promise) detour to tell you why dunbar by edward st. aubyn, aka half the reason i think cishet men shouldn’t write about the lear sisters*, fucking sucks.

[*the other half is fool by christopher moore, but you didn’t hear it from me.]

the thing is that dunbar should work. it’s a king lear retelling that adapts lear’s kingdom into a multi-billion-dollar media company, and that MAKES SENSE. beyond a political position of some kind, lear-as-CEO is the obvious route to take. the plot also follows the original story: the old man starts losing his grip; he disowns the daughter who truly loves him and is mistreated by the daughters who kowtowed to him; he fucks off out into a storm and has a character arc and gets reunited with his daughter and then she dies before they can take the company back. and i literally could not possibly have cared less.

because this book, despite hitting all the clear notes of a lear retelling (old powerful man? check! three daughters? check! madness? check! tragedy? check, check, check!) has no core. it is a book about which millionaire is going to inherit a megacorporation. and maybe i’m just a gay communist, but i don’t care. and yet i do care about king lear, the play. i care very, very deeply about king lear.

and that’s because king lear isn’t just about who will inherit lear’s kingdom. king lear, at its heart, is a story about people who are power-hungry because they are desperate for love - because they just want to be loved, and in a world where love is quantifiable and limited and there’s never enough to go around, grabbing for power seems like either the best way to get love or the best alternative. in dunbar everyone’s squabbling over money (except dunbar’s Angelic Good Pure Virgin Daughter, i guess; don’t get me started about the women in this book); in lear, what everyone wants is love. and that’s why i care about one and not the other.

of course, anyone reading this post can go off and read king lear and come back and go “max, what the fuck, that’s not what king lear is about. king lear is about X and Y and Z.” and they’d be just as right as i am. arguably this is all up to interpretation. That’s Literature. but for me, king lear is about love. and so, despite being set in the modern day and centering on a bunch of mentally ill gay and trans people and also having magic and whatever, my king lear retelling is about people who are power-hungry because they are desperate for love. even with characters’ names changed, even with the setting shifted, even with major elements of the plot changed (because major elements of the plot are definitely changed), it’s a king lear retelling not ONLY because it shares the original story’s setup/concept, but ALSO because it shares (my perception of) the original story’s heart.

so my advice would be to figure out what, to you, is the heart of hamlet. why do you like hamlet? why are you invested in it? what is your personal connection to this story?

anyone can retell hamlet; i mean, i’m going to do it one of these days, allegedly. but your hamlet retelling is not going to be the same as mine or anyone else’s; it’s going to be yours, because to write a retelling is to climb inside a story and make it your own! so whatever makes your hamlet retelling Yours is something you should lean all-into!!! what’s a retelling except saying, “all right, this story is my city now, and i’m going to explore it my way?”

so what is your way?

how can you make this story yours?

how can you tell this story like no one else can?

what, to you, is this story really about?

the answer to that last question? keep that. and do whatever the hell you want with everything else.

[closing notes: you should 1) put gay people in it (joke; do what you want) and 2) definitely tag me / hit me up if you ever post about it (not a joke; i fucking love hamlet and i would love to hear more about your retelling 👀👀👀)]

Freedom Tastes Of Reality

Soulmate identifying marks AU of TMA. Melanie’s experience with marks, or the lack thereof. Part of @tmagirlsweek

on AO3

In a world where many people wear their hearts on their sleeves literally as well as figuratively, Melanie had always been mostly bare of such marks.

It worked out well for her, in a way. When people whose bodies were covered in emblems of their love made videos, the subject inevitably turned to who their marks were for and why, and if Melanie wanted to talk about her feelings incessantly like that she’d be a regular vlogger, which was not the path she wanted her life to take, thanks.

(As it was, anyone who commented on Ghost Hunt UK videos speculating about the vine-covered Ionic column on Melanie’s ankle that represented her father, gone but not forgotten, was roundly ignored. She had enough to work on without indulging such nonsense.)

A few outlines of her fellow Ghost Hunt UK members had just begun to appear on her skin before their outing to the Cambridge Military Hospital, but as the group fell apart afterwards, the outlines faded away until they were gone for good.

Then she got shot by ghosts in India, and she started working at the Magnus Institute when she returned, and perhaps some part of her felt like she should have had marks for her coworkers. Not Elias, of course, not the one who trapped her in here, but her fellow archival prisoners. They did grow closer as time went on, after all, as she got a better sense of exactly how weird and dangerous working in the Archives really was.

Her skin remained blank, though. Love wasn’t the emotion that kept her going those days.

After Elias forced upon her the information of what really happened to her father, how his death was one far more terrible than she had believed, she spent a long time in the shower choking back tears and staring at that ankle mark that represented her father. Even now, after all these years, it was as clear as ever, its lines perhaps even darker than before. She still cared about him, cared about what happened to him, cared so much all her anger turned to sorrow, at least for a brief moment.

But he was gone. He was the only one she cared about enough to have a mark of, and he was gone.

Melanie stopped crying, but the emotion that rose in her to fill that gap was not love, and it formed no marks upon her skin.

They took the bullet out of her, took out the thing pumping the essence of the Slaughter into Melanie’s very being, but not all the anger left with it. Some new anger arose from the incident, in fact, because being operated on without permission was a very strange and new kind of trauma, and it had been done to her by those she was stuck with, those she was almost beginning to trust-

Whenever she looked Jon or Basira in the eyes, she could feel that moment all over again, remember with vivid clarity how it felt to wake up with her leg numb all over, to wake up to her own blood spilled on the floor around her.

Needless to say, much as both tried to apologize, much as Melanie began to recognize in hindsight that having the bullet inside her wasn’t healthy, neither of them were getting a mark any time soon.

Then Melanie started to go to therapy. She hadn’t cried since Elias had let her know the truth behind her father’s death, but now she could again. And sadness wasn’t the most pleasant emotion, but it was... something. Something besides anger.

She tried to get her bearings, to find a stable foundation for herself again, but it was hard when her life was filled with supernatural chaos, when she never knew when it would be upended next.

And then Jon told her how to quit, and Melanie didn’t hesitate for long, and after that, whatever marks Melanie had on her body were ones she herself couldn’t perceive.

Luckily for Melanie, hers weren’t the only pair of eyes on the scene.

“Georgie?”

“Hmm?”

They were sitting side by side together on the couch in Georgie’s flat. It was a little snug, but Melanie didn’t much mind, not when it meant that Georgie was so close, brushing against her with every little movement she made.

“You’ve got a mark for me, right?”

“Course I do!” Georgie sounded almost offended by the question, though she might have been putting it on for Melanie’s sake. Either way, it brought a weak smile to Melanie’s face. “You’re telling me you never saw it?”

“Well...” Melanie pointed at her eyes, or rather, at what remained of them, which wasn’t much after the awl incident. Never let it be said that Melanie King didn’t do whatever she set her mind to do. After a moment, she had her finger, still pointing, circle the general section of her face where her eyes were, just to underscore the point.

Georgie shoved an elbow into Melanie’s side, which made her let out an involuntary yelp. “Before that. It was there for a while beforehand, surprised you never got a peek.”

“Bad luck on my part, I suppose, what else is new.” Before the conversation could linger on that point, before Georgie would start to get concerned, Melanie pressed on. “What’s yours for me look like, then? Does it have a ghost on it?”

“No, I’m a little subtler than that, Miss What The Ghost Logo-”

“It does not look like the ghost in the logo, I swear to God-”

“It's close enough! Awfully on the nose there.” Georgie laughed a little, and Melanie could feel the laughter as much as hear it, could feel the vibrations as Georgie’s body shook with amusement. “Suppose it’s for the best, really, otherwise all that boat stuff might’ve gone way over my head--what’s the deal with that, anyway?”

Melanie hesitated for a moment, picking at her cuticles before responding.

“Suppose I see you as... as an anchor. Or a safe harbor. Something like that.”

Georgie wrapped one arm around Melanie’s shoulder. “For a certain definition of safe, of course.”

“Of course. Do no harm, but take no shit.”

Georgie let out another shake of a laugh. “Exactly!”

“So you’ve said your mark for me doesn’t have a ghost. What does it have, then? Or are we playing Twenty Questions about it now?”

“I mean, we can play Twenty Questions if you want...”

Melanie swatted at Georgie’s face.

“Alright, alright! It’s, it’s got a microphone, but on the handle of it there’s a knife blade coming out--sort of like one of those spy weapons where it looks like something ordinary but it’s got a knife hidden inside-”

Melanie nodded. “You recognize my inner secret agent. I approve.”

“Glad to hear it, Agent King.”

This time Melanie was the one to start laughing. It was soft, and it was uncertain, but it was there.

She had gone so long without laughing, before.

“There’s a snake wrapped around the microphone knife thing, too, I don’t know the species but it’s a turquoise color? Most of it’s around my right shoulder, right about here-” Georgie grabbed one of Melanie’s hands and plopped it on the shoulder in question. Georgie was always so warm to the touch, warm and soft... ”-but that bit goes onto the forearm some.”

Melanie scrunched up her face. “...come to think of it, I remember seeing a snake head poking out from under your clothes before.”

“Yeah, unless I’m wearing long sleeves it tends to do that.”

“Didn’t know it was for me, though. Why a snake?”

“They’re... pretty. And underappreciated. Good for the environment, for getting rid of pests.”

“And if you piss them off, they can kill you?” Melanie kept her voice light, though she stopped herself from going so far as to laugh again. She didn’t want Georgie to think she was laughing at her mark, at the manifest expression of Georgie’s love for her.

“And if you piss them off, they can kill you. Though that doesn’t happen as much as some people think!”

“True, true... who else’ve you got marks for?”

“Oh, a couple others. My parents each have one. Still got a bit of Jon’s.”

“Wait, you’ve got a mark for Jon?”

“Yeah!” Georgie shifted, retreated a bit, though Melanie kept her arm on Georgie’s shoulder, and the arm on Melanie’s shoulder remained in place in turn. “Faded some since we dated, of course, but I’ve still got the skull on my back.”

“A skull?”

“Yeah, two reasons for that one. First, he played Hamlet in uni-”

“He would, the pompous git.”

Georgie didn’t quite laugh, but Melanie could feel the hot air of her exhalation that was something close to one. “And second, he’s got a big head.”

“Well, you got that one right.” Melanie thought silently for a moment,the smile on her face fading into thoughtful neutrality. “I don’t think I have one for him. Maybe- maybe I should. I mean, he did tell me how to quit and all.”

“Doesn’t mean he’s not a prick.”

“I mean, you can have a mark on someone and still be a prick. After all, didn’t you just finish talking about my mark?”

The offense in Georgie’s tone this time was definitely more mockery than real, exaggerated and overdramatic. “Melanie!”

Melanie did her best to mimic Georgie’s tone in turn. “Georgie!”

A brief pause, and then they both burst into laughter, loud and raucous, leaning against each other in a warm and loving embrace.

Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet is a play of itself the worst that I ever heard in my life.

- Samuel Pepys in 1662

Knowing it was Shakespeare’s birthday (23 April) this week gave me a good excuse to re-visit Romeo and Juliet after an interesting discussion about a homework assignment to a teen cousin who was confined at home from boarding school. Quite the precocious girl is this teen cousin of mine and we had a good chat on Zoom on Shakespeare and especially about this play.

Was Pepys correct? Worst ever? No. Overexposed, most certainly. 

I suspect that is so because it’s performed by generations of schools because it speaks to them as they rockily navigate the tribulations of adolescence.

In the UK I went with this teen cousin to see her school play of Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet - months before the Covid pandemic. The girls performed admirably but to be honest I was at the time  unenamoured at the prospect of sitting through hours of soppy teenage angst especially because it was written by the great Bard himself. Probably because I find chocolate box sentimental romanticism so off putting and also because I know Shakespeare could write something much more dramatically challenging in his Hamlet, Othello King Lear, or Macbeth. Romeo and Jullet feels like a waste of ink.

My cousin could see this and upbraided me for feeling so indifferent. On the Eurostar ride back to Paris I had occasion to revisit my feelings and realise perhaps I was mistaken about the play and its intended audience. Over our more recent Zoom discussion I felt I really had misjudged the play.

Despite naysayers mocking it as a tragedy of circumstance, the play is in fact a tragedy of character. That the character in question is very young (probably 16–17 if Juliet is going on 14) means the tragic flaw is not going to be the same as one suffered by a Macbeth, an Othello, or even a Hamlet. It will be a flaw appropriate to the protagonist’s age.

And what is the single most characteristic flaw of adolescence? Impetuous rashness, of course. And that is Romeo’s hamartia. More important, it is a flaw that, with tragic results, taints virtually every character except perhaps the other three Montagues. None of the significant characters seems ever to stop to think before choosing and carrying through some decision.

Shakespeare’s greatness is above all in the representation of the “luminously human,” from “wholly understandable” desperate fantasies like this one, mouthed by a realist who cannot bear what reality has forced on her heart, to wholly occluded things, like the unblinking rancors that drive generations of Capulets and Montagues in hate taken so thoroughly for granted that it results in the deaths of their cherished offspring, and ensures that “all are punished” by a tragic outcome when even a fraction of the willingness to embrace the other the youngest characters have displayed throughout might have saved those children, ended the feud, and united the houses in amity. This future evanesces in the inscrutable cruelty of ancient prejudice, and takes not only comedy, but what the comic represents for the feuding families and for us, the spectators — the renewal of life and reconstitution of societies across generations — away, replacing it with the blank, uncertain future in which grieving parents mourn not only their dead children, but the absence of any clear progeny to continue their families, whether in hostility or amity. The pox has well and truly fallen on both houses; in destroying the youngest and bravest and kindest among them, they have brought their ancient edifices down on their own heads.

And all of this not as told by some ham-handed weaver of fustian, but by William Shakespeare, growing toward the fullness of his powers, and firing on all cylinders at a level of cognitive density and richness that too easily eludes modern high school students, who are the wrong audience for this play. This is a play for adults, not for the kiddies who, pedagogues seem to think, will be interested in its libidinous content. Give kids Macbeth; they’ll like the magic, the blood, the spectacle of watching a real writer make Harry Potter look like the subliterary trifle it is in five short acts. Romeo and Juliet is for adults. It’s for people who have seen and suffered the stupidity of the world and looked on in amazement at our species, and how little it learns from itself — how easily its basest emotions and irrational prejudices lead it by the nose to perdition, as if there were a fate in it.

That the play continues to engage audiences today, despite being so thoroughly familiar to so many, is a sign that it may not be the best ever but certainly it’s not the worst ever either. Of course it’s not as great as his other plays like Hamlet or King Lear or Macbeth or Othello. In comparson R&J lacks their titanism, their uncanny universality, and the full vent they give to the mature Shakespearean style. But that doesn’t mean it can’t and won’t beat up and take the lunch money of whatever it is any of us is likely to be reading right now.

Indeed we should stop bashing Romeo and Juliet as a stupid story about stupid teens. Let's stop bashing sensitive, romantic young men and frankly sexual young women. And let's stop pretending that emotions like love and anger only "count" for fully fledged adults. Romeo and Juliet a story about young people whose parents would rather defend the violent status quo than listen to their children's feelings. And that, unfortunately, is a story every generation still needs.