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blade-that-was-broken · 2 months

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Something to Remember AU Notes

Feel free to ask any questions

Although Branch grows up less isolated, he still has a hard time making friends. His relationship with JD ends up being a weird mix of friends and brothers with some parental - mostly prevalent when he’s young. JD does encourage him to find friends his own age.

Branch isn’t quite as safety cautious. He is but it can be difficult to tell since he can and will do some truly wild feats. What you don’t generally see is him thinking of outcomes and trying to prepare himself best for any of them.

JD’s instincts and subconscious memories/habits help a lot with Branch but he worries he isn’t the same person he was before and that is a disappointment to Branch. And then he’s not sure who Branch prefers if he is entirely different. He’s got a bit of an identity crisis but it’s mostly about what Branch thinks of him rather than what he himself thinks.

JD never becomes good with remembering long run time. Appointments, days and weeks are fine in his mind but the concept of long months and years are ones he frequently forgets.

It took JD a while not to constantly long for his memory back. He still does once in a while but not as much. He very much fears losing his memory again and often tries to write anything he can down in the form of journals or notes.

Branch does get disappointed when it appears Rhonda doesn’t “fix” his colors. It bothers him less as time goes on but in reality, he does get more colorful over time as he enjoys company more and more and allows himself to be happier.

The bunker is a bit smaller in this au, as JD and Branch dont spend a ton of time constantly on it. But it is made, to an extent. They mostly prefer Rhonda due to her ability to grant a quick escape but the bunker does serve well for rations, provisions and storage, as well as living areas.

JD teaches Branch a ton of things that appear dangerous and not exactly age appropriate. What people don’t see is the precautions he takes and the baby steps and learning beforehand. Branch is just a fast learner. The two of them learn new things together too.

This does lead to Branch having ton of confidence in his own abilities and the tasks he can do.

Branch is VERY protective of Floyd’s vest and JD’s goggles. He does not like taking them off, even when he’s young and they don’t fit quite yet.

Both JD and Branch get a bit protective of one another. No one is particularly mean (except for Creek but that’s just cause he’s generally annoying) but sometimes the ex band bros are considered a little strange. They sometimes take offense for one another.

Every single someone asked if Branch was his son, JD has thought about it the possibility in the back of his mind. It drives him crazy sometimes. Branch told him they were brothers but what if they weren’t??

Pretty much only responds to JD and hey goggles even though he gave his goggles to Branch.

Branch calls JD, Puzzle sometimes. JD has a million nicknames for Branch and not one of them is Bitty B.

JD gets headaches/migraines sometimes. He and Branch don’t know if it’s his brain trying to suppress memories or what.

It takes Branch years to grow into a confidence where he is okay with leaving Pop Village to go camping with JD. When Branch and Poppy start dating, JD goes camping by himself usually for a weekend to give them some space. He and Poppy get along well. (I will always support JD Poppy friendship)

#something to remember au #trolls #trolls branch #branch trolls #trolls fandom #john dory #trolls poppy #trolls john dory #broppy #trollstopia #poppy

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thomase1 · 1 year

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Neigbors and headaches

Pairing: Loki×Fem!Reader (other than some thirst, platonic)

Warnings: intense pain, some thirst, touch of angst and lots of fluff/comfort.

Word Count: ~1.700

Thank you @tessathechild for proof reading and helping me! 💙

What, Sel has actually managed to finish and post something once?! Its a good day!! Yes, this one story made it out of my 22!! drabbles and WIP's I've got.

Just a little thing I wrote, thinking of my migraines I sometines get. Saying that, I have written this based on my experiences with a few extras sprinkled in. So this is a cofort/hurt fic.

Loki has been your neigbor for over a year, but you never really spoke. The occasional 'hello' but that was it. Sure you know who he is, would be hard not to, considering he and his collegues are all over the news. Saying that, you are aware of his powers, his heritage and title, to you that just meant there was somebody in the building able to help in case of a robbery or shooting. Other than that, he was just another neighbour on your floor.

Which brings us to the problem. Youve got a migraine, the worst one youve ever had. Normally its located to one side, but this time its just your whole head, pain thundering against you skull. Three days it plagues you already, which is also the amount of time you barely slept. You got about four hours in total, every time you did fall asleep when the pain let off of you for a while, you got violently ripped from slumber again. It never went away for long. Which only made the sleep deprivation worse. Working in this state has been a challange, actually getting your work done impossible. To your horror, your boss noticed today, threatening to cut your payment short would you not 'change your work ethic'. As if you deliberetly got a migraine keeping you off sleep for days.

And you cant go to the doctor either since you got them on your toes already. The sheer amount of pain medications you get perscribed is, understandably, a red flag. The dosage and intensity of them, an even bigger red flag, but what are you surpossed to do?! They just dont work, none of them did.

Which leads us to you, currently knocking on Lokis, or how you adress him, Mr. Laufeyson, door. Its almost 10pm and the lack of sleep let all your pride melt away. You did not want to bother him, but you just cant bare it anymore. Your job is on the line for crying out loud! After a short time, the door opens; an annoyed Mr. Laufeyson peeking through the gap.

"Can I help you?", he beats you to it, irritation etched in his features.

"I'm sorry to bother you at this hour, but I have a strange request." Your heart is beating in your throat, maybe this wasnt a good idea after all, he does seem pretty annoyed.

"What is it?", he sighs, opening the door a little more.

He is wearing forest green pyjama bottoms and to your delight or horror, you arent quite sure yourself, no top. He looks like a marble statue you would see in renown museums and galleries. His chest is on eye level with you, makeing it difficult to not stare at his neatly trimmed black curls there. Your eyes wander to his perfect pecs, his well defined ribs leading down to his chiselled abdomen. That V-line made your breath catch in your throat for a moment, the small trail of hairs leading back down to that, sinfully, low hanging silk. Your eyes linger on the impressive bulge of your opposite for a second, a cleaning of his throat ringing in your tormented head, makeing you wince briefly. But also, you snapped your eyes up to his face again, your eyes blown wide in shock.

"Is it not a little rude to knock on my door at this hour, just to stare when I ask you a question?", his words seem displeases, but his lips are curled into a knowing smirk.

Now you clear your throat, a blush dusting your cheeks pink "What were you saying again?".

He gave a low chuckle, shakeing his head, "I was asking to what I owe your visit, Miss L/n.".

"Oh, yes, sorry. I- Ive got a bad migraine and could not sleep for three days now. I was wondering-", you stutter but get stopped by him.

"I see. Migraines are quite the torment for midgardians I have heard.", he lays a pointer finger to the bow in his upper lip, thinking.

"Yes. Mine arent affected by pain medications either, I would not bother you if they were.", you tell him earnestly, your eyes dropping to the floor.

"It is rather fine, shall we get to your apartment so I can figure out a way to help you?", he asks with a soft smile that calms you down like a weighted blanket.

"Really? Yes, that would be so nice of you, thank you so much." You sway a little, pulling at your sleeve.

"Let me just get a shirt and some shoes and I will be right there.", he tells you, leaning the door closed.

A moment later he returns, now wearing a basic grey v-neck shirt and some brown slippers. "After you.", he gestures with his hand.

You nod enthusiastically, which you instantly regret, your pain reigniting like pouring gasoline to an open flame. You groan in pain, holding onto the nearest wall, your head feeling like it is sinking and rising repeatedly.

"Are you alright?", he grabs your upper arm, holding you stable.

You groan a "yes".

"I dont think you are, lets get you home, come on.", he hooks an arm around you waist, helping you over to your door.

You dig out your keys, trying to open the door, but your vision is playing tricks on you. He grabs them from your hands, "Allow me.". He quickly has the door open, nudging it open with his foot. Finally inside, with your shoes off and seated on your little two-seater sofa, you look at him. The pain eased off a little by now.

"Thank you, Mr. Laufeyson. I'm very sorry for the trouble.", you twiddle your thumbs.

"No trouble at all. Call me Loki please.", he sits down next to you, a friendly smile playing on his lips.

"Y/n.", you smile back at him. There is a comfortable silenence for a bit, until another groan of yours breaks it.

"Its worse again?", you hear his voice through cotton balls, thats what it sounds like at least.

"Yea.", you whimper, unable to explain it further. He waits until your eyes open again and you take a deep breath.

"So it comes and does in waves?"

"Its always there, but I can function with that pain. But then there are these sudden intense pains that just have me helpless.", you explain to him, noticing you are a bad host, "I'm sorry, would you like something to drink? Tea perhaps?".

He waves it off, "You were barely able to speak a momemt ago, let alone brew tea. I am just fine, thank you. And those pains, are they pulsating, throbbing, stabbing,..?".

You think about it, "The normal, bearable pain is pulsating, the sudden ones are throbbing, like a jackhammer.".

He humms his confirmation and thinks for a moment. "I think I have a spell that could help with that, though only temporaryly I'm afraid.", he looks at you a little sad.

"That sounds good, please just make it stop for now at least.", you beg him, the desperation clear in your voice.

He nods, "Make yourself comfortable.". You lean back into the cushions, to which he whispers, "Very well.".

He turns to face you better, giving you direct view of his jaw muscles. "You will feel a tingling first. After that you will alternately grow cold and very warm. Do not worry, that is totally normal.", he explains to you calmly.

"Understood."

He lays his hand on your head, palm flat against your forehead. You look at it expectedly. "Close your eyes?", he suggest, you follow, "Lovely. Now just stay calm and breathe for me.".

Just as he finishes what he says, you feel your skin tingle, growing warm after a brief moment. Very warm and then suddenly cold. Then warm again, but it stays at a soothing temprature, like a heating pad.

The pain subsides, almost like a wave washing it into nothingness. You smile and humm at the peaceful release from your torment. You havent even noticed in how much pain you were for the last thee days straight, until it was gone.

"Better?", he asks you.

You leave your eyes closed, savouring this moment of peace, you confirm his question with a 'mhhm'.

You hear his low timbre of voice tell you something, but you cant grasp his words. Your exhaustion kicked in right away, sleep taking you in a matter of seconds.

"Should it come up again and bother you or if you have any side effects, come to me at once.", Loki tells her but doesnt get an answer.

He feels her body growing limp. "Y/n?", he asks her in a whisper, only getting her even breath as confirmation.

She fell asleep. He smiles to himself, 'Poor thing is exhausted.'.

He gets up to leave, but as he's stood in front of her door, he glances over one last time. 'She would rather sleep in her bed, I guess.', he thinks as he sees her beginning to slump over to the side.

He walks over to her bed, drawing back the covers and then goes to collect her into his arms. Carefully as not to wake her, he walks over and sets her down. He makes sure her head lays comfortably and drapes her duvet over her.

He conjures a piece of paper and a pen, writing her a little message.

Dear Y/n,

you fell asleep, so I took the liberty of moving you to your bed, ensuring you sleep comfortable.

I did lock your door by magic, but you can unlock it as usual.

Just in case you ask yourself how that took place.

I hope you are well rested and pain free when you read these words.

Loki.

He places it on her nightstand and leaves her apartment, locking it as he told her in the letter. That night, he, too, had a peaceful sleep, feeling a sense of pride of being able to help this sweet neighbour of his.

When you woke up, you were confused at first, but quickly found the note Loki left you. You are so ashamed for falling asleep on him, not even thanking him for helping you. How embarrassing.

You defently owe him one.

#loki laufeyson #loki x y/n #loki x you #loki x sick reader #sick fic #hurt/comfort #migraine #sexualapocalysesociety

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meimeikyu · 9 months

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Dump as many geno headcanons as you physically have and want to share ( also ink ones if you have any )

ONGOMG OK I HAVE. MANY.!!! ILL ALSO DROP ANY INK ONES I HAVE BCS. I LOVE HIM TOO <333

theres no order in this its just. brainrot chaos

Okay first off, I think geno would be really really sensative to colour, both in the savescreen n out of it. Esp with his escaping the savescreen end, I think the ton of colour everywhere would be like super overstimulating for him since hes been in. a black void with minimal colour and light for. A very very long time- i like to imagine hed have like tinted glasses (something like sunglasses but also prescription glasses? i <3 geno with glasses) to help block out the colour n light.

i also think hed have chronic pain and dizziness/fainting spells (totally not just me protecting huh noo) due to having only a part of a soul, snd the fact its affected by determination, i feel like itd cause him a lottt of issues. he would experiment on himself and make his own little gear n gadgets n aids n stuff to help with it bcs. science boy. If he gets too emotional in any capacity (especially anger, but also like too sad even too happy just. too anything) he starts melting again starting from his socket. i think his scar would still bleed out of the save screen. it wouldnt hurt unless ppl are touching it but i think itd always bleed magic. which would be very inconvenient- he also likes to wear white and light colours due to the colour sensory issues which makes the bleeding scar a lot more obvious- i call it a magic defect in my head, basically just a permanent issue with his magic that he cant stop but also isnt inherently harming him.

i think about this guy sm i love him

continued geno ramblings hed keep doing science stuff outside of the save screen, both experimenting with his magic and (when he can rope him in) the other sans of their verse (who i call after). Geno n after would have slightly different memories. i think geno would remember past things after cant, but after can remember like the active timeline better then geno. geno would also have more science knowledge then him i think. Geno would probably lose tract of time in the save screen and have no idea how long hes been there. I also hc hes like. 100s of years old if you count all the time in the savescreen. he doesnt know that though. I think geno would get really paranoid that things would reset and he would get trapped in the save screen again. i dont think he likes the colour yellow. i think this man has (better than in the past) but still very bsd mood swings, which coupled with the fact he could melt and die if its too intense is not great. hed have to relearn a lot of his magic after injecting the determination and it still will never be the same as it was before, i think the determination would fuck with his summoning abilities especially.

(do monsters melt when they have too much determination because monsters are made of magic and determination fucks with and breaks down magic? am i only thinking if this now???)

i think his socket would have melted first because his eyelights have strong amounts of magic. i also like to draw him with not just the socket melted but like. that entire side of his head melted when hes in the savescreen. i think once hes out itd be a bit less melty but still not. pleasant. he has a little fabric thing he made that he wears out that covers that half of his skull to hide the melting. he only sleeps on his left side because if he sleeps on his right or back the melty stuff will get everywhere. I think hes put his hand through the goop into his skull more than once. for. scientific research. if he touches the inside it makes a ringing noise n gives him a massive headache. i think head get migraines very easily and be very overwhelmed by sounds bcs of the melty side as well. his fingers are slightly shorter than afters because the tips (where i hc magic like. pools.) melted off.

I dont know why I have this one but i love the idea of geno being a good singer. i dont know why but i love it. i think hed listen to music a lot, esp to calm down. He would hyperorganize things, and like to keep things on shelves and in draws and trys to keep the floor clean. his workspace would be less clean though, the floor would be clean but hed use the trusty old 'shove everything in the corner of the desk' method. He wears baggy clothes a lot and prefers them. He doesnt like the public. I think hed constantly hear a slight ringing in his head and it would annoy the hell out of him- robbed from my fren but hed always have some sort of sound on like music or white noise and hed have like. at least 2 fans in his room for noise. kinda from cpau but. he would not drink much and gets drunk vv easily (i had another headcanon to put here but. i switched to typing on my pc and i forgor it :<)

this guy is. so silly. so so very silly. is he even a guy? no one knows. i hc hes genderfluid and also pangender n i think hed use a bunch of like microgenders and the promply forgor all of them. i. i dont think he sleeps. i dont think he knows how. until he runs out of paint and WHOMP collapse asleep. I love him being like, nice but very blunt. i think he has 12 projects running at all times and none of them are the same medium. he has an ao3 account im 100% sure. wheres that one gif hold on

uhhhh overall i love this man so much but holy shit he needs a hug and. all the therapy. just all of it. like. yesterday. but ilove him so so much spins him around in a microwave in my head.

THE INK ONES!!!!

oh also he speaks french

THIS ONE!!!! HES JUST DOING THIS IN MY HEAD CONSTANTLYY (i cant find the source if someone has it pls let me know)

yeah i cant think of him without thinking of this gif its permanently my preception of him. hed bully kids on roblox but like in a silly way. i think hes like constantly making little changes to his outfit that no one but him can notice the difference but hed like proudly show it off. i think hed listen to at least one song from every genre and have at least 2 songs he adores no one in their life has ever heard of. he doesnt not have playlists he has one large thing of all his songs and runs it on shuffle. I think bcs of his paints the colours around him can influence his mood, and i also think the saturation of stuff would, n i also think thatd affect his art. Like when hes really happy hed paint with super bright colours but if hes more sad hed use greyscale and dark colours n stuff like that. I think he has a massive collection of art exploring really fucked up things he doesnt show to anyone. I do not think theyd just be sad art too, i think some of them would be but hed also have like max saturated color gore artworks. this guy has never kept a pencil or eraser or pen long enough for them to run out. he has a hoard of supplies bcs he always loses things. I think he has a list of a bunch of aus he wants to draw that he keeps on him at all times (not like aus to create but like, aus he wants to visit and create based on the scenery). i think broomy has a secret compartment on him that ink stores art supply backups and vial backups in. he does forget about it sometimes and has accidentally popped it open in a fight before, scaring both him and whoever he was fighting. speaking of i dont think hed be big on fighting, but i think he would do it sometimes as a way to try and explore how the people interact. i <3 having ink love to like. study others emotions. he has a ton of artworks just of peoples faces portraying different emotions. I dont think hed just draw and paint i think hed write and make music and do any form of art you can think of. except cooking. hes been banned from cooking and baking. he knows why.

overall rating: 6/5 Stars, so very silly

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royalwriteroftheuniverse · 2 years

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Summer Wedding part 2 Part 1 here

Dont post or publish anywhere in qny form REBLOGS and COMMENTs are APPRECIATED! Im new at this

Ari trying to figure out how to fix things. But being a schmuck. Sammy is Ari's friend who is a doctor field medic from Red Sea Diving Resort. A jury is a final for college students who are musicians.

Ari was sitting on the floor with his back up qgainst the wooden pannels that lined the walls. His face was still red and remnents from the tears remained on his face while new ones threatened to follow the same trails.

"Sammy you should have heard her,

She called herself worthless peice of shit for making me cry. Her saying how much she hates herself. How much she loves me. Almost three hours of just straight sobs and wailing."

"Ari what did you do ?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing? Is she safe you don't think she'-"

"No. She just wants me."

"She was crying all night beating herself up and you just sat there and listened. Why didn't you go to her?"

"Because," he sighed "She deserves someone who can be here more im away I'm-"

"Always be coming home to her.

"And I didn't do nothing uh anything.......I made her dinner."

"What happened did you guys just sit in silence?"

"Well she ate her sandwich in her room."

"Did she just leave to go to her room or did you ask her."

"To be specific I put the food infront of her door. With a note to please eat. I knocked"

"Ah leaving food at her door when she's held up there like a prisioner."

"She's not."

"Has she left the room?"

"No. But she was crying a lot. Then when I was sure she was sleeping."

"Don't say it Ari."

"I needed to get clothes."

"You. That's. Don't even try and claim it was surveillance. To make sure she was ok."

"No I and didn't kiss her. Well not really. I did what I always do when I get in late and she's sleeping I always give her a small kiss on her head. I did that and gently moved the hair out of her face and she always gets a migraine if she sleeps in a pony tail so I took the pony tail out and I smoothed out her hair. I mean its not like I was stroaking her hair an hour. Only a few minutes to try and comfort her. What kind of boyfriend would I be if I let her get a migriane on top of everything else. It's nothing she isn't ok with like I said I do it all the time and I really did need to change."

"Ari I'm saying this as a friend and as a doctor your doctor you need help. She needs help. Either appologize and say I dont want to break up or ill tell Ethan-"

"Fine."

"What?"

"Tell Ethan to put me behind a desk. I don't care. I cannot let her just beat herself up like that. I'm soothing her the only way I know how. And she wants me back."

"This is just increasingly disturbing did that not occur to you."

"I know but I just she looked so miserable. Pathetic. Like a lost puppy you know and just still so beautiful the way her hair laid just so and I just couldn't stand there. I love her to much to hear those wimpers in her sleep I had to sooth her."

"Wow. Ok lets just deconstruct that whole paragraph. You decided to touch your ex's hair, who YOU broke up with by the way, while she was unconscious because you felt bad. Did I miss anything?"

"She also looked too beauti-"

"Ari. You do know how weird that sounds right? Even if it Too beautiful? Why did you break up with her?"

"She knows I do it."

"When you were two-geh-ther. You aren't."

"So that goes out the window everything we had?"

"Yes"

"But she was so upset I didnt know how else to help."

Sammy sighed.

"If I need to I can-"

"It was so quiet this morning she's usually singing preparing for her jury she's so stressed about that. They made her do a german peice she has so much trouble-"

"Ari"

"The prononciation just trips her up every time."

"Ari"

"Oh god I hope she didn't strain her voice. She has her Jury soon. Shes been so panicky with thr german they're having her do. I've been helping her with her German. Oh god." Ari stood up in a panic her hasn't felt since the day Maya was born. He frantically he went into and through Items in the kitchen nd how fast he filled the kettle and turned on the stove before diving into the cabinets.

"Did I pick up that tea she uses? She could probably use that."

"Ari"

"It's not weird if I make her tea right?. I know how she takes it. She could probably use god where did I put that shit? Ok I know I just saw that honey she uses too. Sh-"

"Ari!"

"What Sam-Oh what here is. Thank god.-"

"Ari- god I'm going to have to bring both of you seditives."

"She has 3 teas left. I should get more right? Her throat must be so gone. Can you come over tomorrow and take a look she cant hurt jt. Please."

"If be more than haply to but Ar-

"Thank you." Ari sighs.

"But Ar-"

"You have no idea how hard this has been for her-"

"Ari SHUT IT. Listen to yourself. YOU do realize you're the one making it hard. This is not a mission I mean she sounded +broken when you spoke about her crying and you're freaking out because she might not have enough tea but you're refusing after you already became creep of the month, to go to her. Or I'll show up and comitt both of you to a mental ward. Do you hear yourself? You're still in love with her."

Ari got the tea before it got too hot and poured some milk and honey in, mixing it together. Ari then put the tea bag in the cup and as he was pouring the hot water over all three."

"Ari you need to talk to her."

"I am"

"Oh thank god."

"I'm bringing her tea."

Taglist

@nana1000night

#avengers #steve rogers #ransom drysdale #chris evans x plus size reader #steve rogers fanfiction #ari levinson imagine #ari levinson x female reader #chris evans #chris evans characters #ransom thrombrey #ari levinson #ari levinson x you #ari levinson x reader #captain america x you #ari levinson fanfiction #ari levinson fluff

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chronic-gastro-illness-culture · 3 months

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I feel really alone and embarrassed dealing with chronic constipation (and diarrhoea from laxatives that I need to take). I also have a chronic fissure and hemmeroids. It is so painful and I don't know what to do.

that is a rlly difficult thing to live w

i dont wanna sound like im punching down or anything bc its not like any disability or chronic illness is any kind of “well off” in society but there definitely is an added stigma of having a digestive disorder

within reason bc anyone who has a chronic illness/es has ppl in there life who dont understand the ‘chronic’ in chronic illness ppl w chronic migraines or ear aches or pain or fatigue can talk abt what they r going thru even if ppl dont always understand but beyond saying “tummy hurtyy :(“ or saying ur n* or feel s* to ur stomach or vaguely indicating u r experiencing vague intestinal discomfort ppl w chronic digestive disorders rlly cant be fully open abt all the pain n suffering n even the celebrations like being constipated n finally being able to take a shit bc there is so much stigma n taboo abt “bathroom stuff”

like constipation for example is more then just cant shit it causes a whole list of physical symptoms from bloating cramps n* thats persistent n its just a miserable time n all that lain effects ur mood n mental health too

n when ppl who have other chronic disorders say things like my migraine is gone or my ear ache is gone or my flare up is over or today is a low fatigue/pain day then ppl celebrate w them yk they share in that victory but if u go around as a person who deals w constipation n say hey i finally got to poop :D ppl r like ew thats tmi i dont wanna know what u did in the bathroom

n that shame is compounded for people w chronic gastro disorders bc not only r u dealing w the inherent shame n ableism of having a chronic illness n ppl getting frustrated w u bc ur sick all the time again bc they dont understand the ‘chronic’ in chronic illness or think ur faking or exaggerating etc but then theres the extra layer of shame of having a digestive disorder n the very nature of ur chronic illness being viewed as inherently disgusting n taboo n unsanitary

n i made this blog bc sometimes u rlly do gotta be the change u wanna see in the world hahaha

anyways i cant do much for ur physical pain but ive added “#constipation” as a tag n queued up some specific constipation related posts so u can see others deal w it too n ur not alone

#anonymous #constipation #digestive disorders #chronic illness #stomach problems #hemmeroids #laxatives

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obsolete-stars-if · 3 months

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progress update

1st feb 2024

like i wanted to do this year on every 1st of each month, we have a general progress update, what ive been up to, general stats, plans for the upcoming month, how the last month treated me and how i treated this game. lots of personal detail will happen.

january has been the least productive month yet, im trying to not let it get to me, i had to take lots of breaks, my bed literally broke down on me on the 1st and it took over 2 weeks to get the new bed to me. sleeping on the ground made writing so impossible bcs i got chronic pain flair ups, migraines as well as hip pain. it was agony. i did however cleaned my room and got a new bed and this change of paste was really welcome. now that i finally have an actual desk to write on again, I can look outside my window and watch the squirrels while i write, so beautiful. that does mean i didnt finish chapter 7 which is a bummer, but im trying to stay positive. i did publish part 2 in a more rough than usual state, just bcs i needed it out, i wouldve lost my mind if i didnt update it. I allowed myself to take a break from OS since the last update, bcs even if i didnt actively wrote most of jan, i still thought about OS and beat myself up for not writing. And i had some time to work on other things that I plan for the future, others stories i wanna tell some day (im not starting a new wip bcs i will literally never finish anything if i do), and also just, reading and drawing without thinking about OS too much. It were only a few days, but it was a much needed break, bcs since OS went officially online last May, there wasnt really a day where i didnt think about OS.

stats from Jan: I wrote a total of 8.477 words over the 8 days that i worked on this. That doesnt sound much, but its still about 1k words each day. obv the 8,5k words arent the 20k I set out to do in the beginning of January, but im just happy i did something.

The game is now over 70k words long (including code, i wrote that shit imma count it), i know its not as much as other ppls wips, but damn, it feels crazy to me, knowing i sat down, laptop on my lap (in my bed primarily) and just wrote that much in less than a year.

Plans for feb: for the love of god i need to get chapter 7 done. i also set the goal to 10k, since there are less days in february and i know that i might not get the time to write as i will be job hunting, yay. the goal will be adjusted in march depending on if and what job i get maybe. in general im pretty scared of february and march, bcs i will lose the financial aid and im not sure yet how the fuck will i finance myself, since moving back with my mom is a no. and i refuse to open a kofi or patreon. im very against earning money from my hobby and i hope i dont have to resort to it ever. (personal opinion)

Anyway, thanks for listening and lets hope that february will be a good month, ey

#obsolete stars if #obsolete stars #progress update #february #janurary #writing #personal

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rjshepherd · 2 years

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xemnas headcanons???

on my blog? more likey than you think

tldr im bored waiting for my printer to do art prints and i cant work at my table bc theres no room bc of the printers/cricut so headcanon time?

long post under cut

Xemnas IS technically a keyblade wielder but the problem is he never had a keyblade of his own. and since he has no heart and you need a heart to get one(although you dont need a heart to wield one) hes outa luck.

since hes gotten his own heart circa kh3 i imagine he COULD use one, maybe even find someone to make him one from his own heart, a la redemption au.

an absolute menace in the kitchen. his ambition far outstrips his skill and he has ruined more dishes than anyone else in the castle. even the dusks dread seeing him walk in to the pantry.

so hes meant to be about 28-30 and isa is around 24-26 which means skuld could be something similar. i like to imagine in another world he's good friends with this girl bc of his ux player connection .

Kh2 xemnas is just insufferable but he is especially bad if he is sick which is more often than you'd think

im calling bs on that whole "hes terras body so he doesnt like sweets" this man LOVES sweets, sweet everything. if theres a sweet option he will take it even in savory foods . he pretends he likes the finer things but he will literally eat any garbage as long as it is 90% sugar.

gets migraines from wine, because he only drinks red dessert wines and not say, fruity white wine or something crisp and light.

Cheese fiend. loves a good charcutier board more than anything

also just loves fatty rich foods. kinda surprised he hasnt contracted gout or some shit.

not a morning person, never has been.

will fall right back asleep if you play with his hair

sees Xion as Ventus and has a hard time telling her and roxas apart

redemption au xemnas has caught terra-norts fury. hes so painfully angry about how unfair all of this is, how xigbar/luxu manipulated them and how he's questioning every decision hes ever made because was it really his choice if someone else was pulling the strings from behind the scenes?

he doesnt get yelling angry now he just gets frustrated tearful angry and very very anxious about everything

is just very full of feelings and doesnt know how to deal with ANY of them. Crying a LOT but has NO idea why.

Xion/Isa made him watch inside out to try and put words to his emotions and it actually kinda worked.

despite everything Xion is probably the best at dealing with him, next to maybe Aqua and Kairi (although none of them really want to)

Spends too much time apologising in a really awkward way. has no idea how to just say sorry and leave it at that. its always "im sorry...that 'insert terrible thing i did here that you dont want to be reminded of'" i think everyone would prefer he just didn't acknowledge it and moved on

platonic XemSai?

He's lowkey kinda clingy with ansem. As he said, he took his companions for granted and now he has no one. He got ansem back and hes not prepared to let go of him again

Doesnt really have a trio to be a part of. Ventus and Terra find him a little creepy and Aqua doesnt want Ansem around for the bs he pulled in kh3 . Seasalt quartet find him off putting for various reasons (although theyre more tolerant than most). Isa is ....well he feels for Xemnas but he doesnt want to cause friction with his actual friends. Destiny trio are ready to comit hate crimes against him and riku has had to physically hold kairi back at various points in time. little lady is just full of fight for her friends and no tolerance for bs

NGL the guilt of what he did to kairi is eating him alive. Kairi wants nothing to do with him but she is a forgiving sort. Finding him inconsolably upset because of what he was feeling pulled at her heart strings. she accepted his apology and begrudgingly allowed him a hug.

provided he never speak of it again.

The radient garden gang are probably the most tolerant. they let him have his own room on the grounds he minds his own damn business and stays out of there way. Ienzo is the nicest but hes nice to everyone so i dont think that counts. Ansem the wise and Even mostly ignore him but Aleaus and Dilan really have it out for him. one of them is almost always watching him for being suspicious and as soon as anthing goes missing or wrong Xemnas gets the blame. he mostly prefers to just go elsewhere.

spends a lot of time in Erandelle and the kingdom of Corona just exploring. he likes hiking the mountains to watch the auroras and exploring the forests to listen to bird song.

Not really sure where hes staying in this au but i imagine he'd get on ok in San fransokyo. maybe have some fun at the university?

Nightmares for days

Post kh4 sora decided to be nice and take him to Monstropolis to see if they had any suggestions to help with his nightmares. it didnt help much but it was a nice gesture that xemnas really apreciated

Sora isnt there for the start, when xemnas was trying to find his footing as a whole ass human with a heart, so he didnt see the worst of it. but sora can literally win over anyone, make friends with any sentient creature so its not long before Xemnas counts sora as a friend, despite everything theyve gone through.

hngg im sure i have more so if u want more xemnas, au or nort rambelings hmu in asks

#xemnas #kingdom hearts #xemnas headcanons #headcanons #my head canons #my stuff #my art #ansem #sora #kairi #riku

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ofstarfleet · 11 months

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now it is time for my kirk on the brain post

struggles with depression survivor's guilt and PTSD. he has lived through so much shit that he just internalizes and never really recovers or processes from. he often sees flashback, feels guilt about loss of lives under his command and has reported sleepless nights coupled with flashbacks. he has had nightmares and restless nights.

has frequent migraines and back pain. both can be crippling but because of the "captains dont show weakness" ideal, he hides it well and has a very high pain tolerance. the migraines worsened after dagger of the mind when he was in that machine.

Kirk has to be reminded to eat/sleep etc bc he's essentially a workaholic. he throws himself into his work at the exclusion of all else. after the Sacagawea his work-life balance improved. however, once aboard the Enterprise he began to slip back into working himself into the grave essentially. even with a yeoman, he tends to want to do many things himself and thus he has a hard time accepting the help of his personal yeoman.

rarely takes shore leave. he cannot be parted from his beloved ship. however as it is necessary, he grudgingly takes shore leave when strong armed into it by Spock/McCoy.

indulges in horseback riding and absolutely loves horses

was considered the golden child by his parents and was gifted in the academy. however, the kobeyashi maru test is what has made people wary about his accomplishments bc he cheated the test.

is very knowledgeable about engineering though it was not his main focus. he knows the Enterprise inside and out because he has studied her. he's been shown to be intelligent and adept at engineering to the point he can assist in repairs. he knows some bits of physics, etc because he has to have some knowledge as he's captain. he is extremely well read.

despite what is shown in TOS, I headcanon he's actually very good at hand to hand combat.

is quite methodical and thinks 3-5 steps ahead as shown when he plays 3D chess.

while he has indulged in one night stands, he is the type to fall fast and hard for someone given enough time. however, he desires a long term relationship but has a fear of commitment due to past relationships not working out. he is afraid of being hurt, of hurting others, and of not living up to expectations. this makes him rather flightly when it comes to establishing romance and makes him prone to simple casual flings. it's more than just his love for job and ship, it's based on a pattern of failed romances when he was aboard the Sacagawea. he never figured out a work/life balance and he is unwilling to sacrifice his command track job for a desk job. he needs a partner that understands this and the risk of being with a captain. he's been hurt and he is scared of that hurt/hurting others.

#filed under > headcanons

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supportive-editor · 2 years

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THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Meme.

Mun & Muse

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

tagged by: no one! I wanted to do this myself-- asjfsdh, AND ADVERTISE SHIBU HEHEHEHE >:D tagging: @coffee-stains-and-migraines @jestersclowns @iustitia-punientis @jesterofinaba @booksilent u guys dont have to do it tho wwww

MY MUSE IS: canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless / complicated. ( basically a minor npc that showed up in maruki’s confidant and was introduce as a friend of his?? i just grabbed the man and made him some sort of canon-oc)

IS YOUR CHARACTER POPULAR IN THE FANDOM?: YES / NO / MAYBE ( probably amoung maruki stans aka me n like 3 people on this site)

IS YOUR CHARACTER CONSIDERED HOT™ IN THE FANDOM? YES / NO / IDK. (again, maruki stans-- AKA ME n 3 PEOPLE)

IS YOUR CHARACTER CONSIDERED STRONG IN THE FANDOM? YES / NO / IDK.

ARE THEY UNDERRATED? YES / NO / IDK. (hey a/tlus u cant just make this guy show up for 2 scenes aND NOT GIVE US BACKSTORY .)

WERE THEY RELEVANT FOR THE MAIN STORY? YES / NO

WERE THEY RELEVANT FOR THE MAIN CHARACTER? YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG. ( spoilers tho!!! id say like kinda relevant but also kinda not )

ARE THEY WIDELY KNOWN IN THEIR WORLD? YES / NO.

HOW’S THEIR REPUTATION? GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

HOW STRICTLY DO YOU FOLLOW CANON?: HE’S A BLANK SLATE MY CANON NOW HUEHUEUEHUEHUEHUHEUEHUEHUHEUHEUHEUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHE. In all seriousness, I’ve only revolved his canon with Maruki and Rumi aka being a friend of theirs. While Maruki says they’ve met in college, I say they’ve been friends since high school!

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka: try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals. — @ Adult muses in their late 20s and 30s, Wanna Join an Emo-Metal Band? Also, do you want embarrassing secrets about MarukI? DO YOU LIKE DOGS? ESPECIALLY FAT SHIBA INUS? DO YOU LIKE FORMER-DELINQUENTS? ALSO DO YOU LIKE TIRED OFFICE WORKERS WHO ALSO HAPPENED TO BE LEADERS OF AN INDIE EMO METAL BAND!? AND THEN MISTER TATSUO SHIBUSAWA IS THE GUY FOR YOU!!!!!

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?) -- Honestly, he kinda seems like a boring office worker if you first meet him. Also he’s literally an npc-- Who only interacts with like 1% of the casts. So people might find it hard to connect with him. Unless we plot like a relationship!!! Then we can work on that!

WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO RP YOUR MUSE? — His stupidly handsome face showed up in Maruki’s confidant and I’ve been bewitched ever since. Also, he looks like an older version of the FC I have for him! Who happens to be a huuuge comfort character! I also have an Akira-- So I kinda wanted to experiment with Shibusawa! And well, with the help with some close friends and various inspiration from various games and anime of making this weird canon-oc, I’m pretty happy with him!

WHAT KEEPS YOUR INSPIRATION GOING? — If people say they like him and wanna keep interacting with him!! Esp... if they wanna befriend him in some way....

SOME PERSONAL QUESTIONS FOR THE MUN Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

DO YOU THINK YOU GIVE YOUR CHARACTER JUSTICE? YES / NO / I SINCERELY HOPE I DO? (idek man im probably the only shibu out there jafds)

DO YOU FREQUENTLY WRITE HEADCANONS? YES / NO / SORT OF (It’s technically canon since hes just.. an oc ! So anything i say goes >:3c )

DO YOU SOMETIMES WRITE DRABBLES? YES / NO

DO YOU THINK A LOT ABOUT YOUR MUSE DURING THE DAY? YES / NO (I told u, I am bewitched by an NPC who shows up for 3 scenes )

ARE YOU CONFIDENT IN YOUR PORTRAYAL? YES / NO / SORT OF ( NOT EVERYONE IS GONNA LIKE HIM I GUESS )

ARE YOU CONFIDENT IN YOUR WRITING? YES / NO / A LITTLE BIT ( when inspiration strikes! I tend to repeat a lot of phrases tho. I hate that. )

ARE YOU A SENSITIVE PERSON? YES / NO / SORTA.

DO YOU ACCEPT CRITICISM WELL ABOUT YOUR PORTRAYAL? — If it’s constructive yeah! again, Shibu is just a weird canon-oc.

DO YOU LIKE QUESTIONS, WHICH HELP YOU TO EXPLORE YOUR CHARACTER? — ABSOLUTELY!!!!!! I want to give as much character development for this guy....

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES TO A HEADCANON OF YOURS, DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY? -- This doesn’t apply to me lmao.

IF SOMEONE REALLY HATES YOUR CHARACTER, HOW DO YOU TAKE IT? — I’ve had like one instance because of his association with Maruki. But I won’t get into detail about it. HOWEVER, if you don’t like him, the unfollow button is right there!

ARE YOU OKAY WITH PEOPLE POINTING OUT YOUR GRAMMATICAL ERRORS? — I point out my own and fix it instantly because it’s embarrassing.

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE EASY GOING AS A MUN? — I’d like to think so! I’m just very shy and very BAD at communication. d;kfjkalsdfj, ive been told way too many times I seem intimating BUT I CAN ASSURE YOU, I am just as intimidated as you are.

#trivia section ! ; dash games #ooc ;#cw long post #forcing all to rp with shibu #OR IF U WANT I WONT MAKE U #but it would be cool tho :eyes:

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tentaipetto · 3 months

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Chapter 15

Thoros sat at his place at the head of the large polished wood dining table and waited for his food to arrive, the guest too, but the food was what was on his mind at this particular moment. He had tried to be more 'present' with his guests, with affairs of the state, but he had found that his talents were best served smoking large cigars and eating fabulous meals. Guests started to file noisily into the dining room, they all seemed to be in good spirits, although to Thoros people were generally in good spirits around him, he had a party atmosphere. The men wore brightly coloured suits with metallic threads and shiny shirts, the women were a different matter all together. The were primped and preened to within an inch of thier lives, thier make up looked like it was applied with some industrial appliances and a lot of patience. Thier clothes were impressive to say the least, everything that could be 'fancied up' had been, corsets, threading, buttons, edgings. It was enough to give even the sturdiest farmer a migraine. Thoros watched as people found thier seats and settled down with drinks and smokes awaiting the first of many courses, small conversations were breaking out around him but he wasnt being his usual gregarious self, he was holding himself back for the guest that hadnt arrived yet. She entered through the main doorway directly opposite Thoros at the other end of the table, he hair had been tamed and shone like spun silk and she worn a beautiful dress that did impressive things with her assets. Thoros watched as she looked around nervously, waiting for someone to give her some direction. "Ismelda my dear child!" he bellowed across the length of the room, drawing every pair of eyes with it to the rabbit caught in the preverbial headlights at the other end, "come and sit yourself next to me, we have plenty to discuss!" he smiled broadly as Ismelda made her way unsteadily to his side and took a seat, apparently she wasnt used to walking in heels. He watched as Ismeldas eyes darted from one thing to another, traced along the other people, her mouth gaping open and a rather gormless look across her face. Dumbstruck was the word he couldnt think of. He was also struck by how attractive she was when she was properly attired and attended to. His mind began to wander into things and scenerios that shouldnt be considered proper between a ruler and a young chosen girl. Behind him, a waited called out "Wild Mushrooms stew with Roasted Red Onions" and a line of waiters all holding small bowls of steaming food appeared from side rooms and placed them in front of the awaiting guests. Thoros looked at his portion hungrily, almost forgetting himself as he began to slurp at the delicious offering. He had made sure to employ the best chefs that the Northern Bank had to offer when he had taken up residence as ruler, it was one of the few things in life that he truly got to enjoy so he figured he may as well have the best on tap.

"So, you are the chosen one, yes?" The question came from one of Thoros' advisors Hector Roberson, he was a portly fellow who was known to enjoy a good stew almost as much as Thoros, although he wasnt in a position to afford such capable chefs and had to rely on the talents of his wife. Hector watched Ismelda for any reaction to the question but she seemed calm enough under the circumstances. "That is what I have been told sir, I dont feel no different that I used to, except here I get to wear nicer clothes" she took another spoonful of her stew and Thoros found himself mesmerised by the movement of her mouth. "Do you know what it means though child?" Hector pushed her, he seemed to think she knew more than she had been letting on. "I know it means Im important" Ismelda seemed to wince as the words left her throat "I know it means that I have a part to play in how the world does, thats all I got taught, thats all I know sir" She was beginning to look a bit flustered. "Enough enough Hector, let the poor girl eat her stew! We will have plenty of time to discuss things after we have all had our fill!" Thoros interuptted before Hector could push the girl any further, he was finding himself in a strange position of wanting to protect her almost, she looked so lost and alone in this place. He guessed it must be very different to what she was used to at home. He took another spoonful of stew and savoured it in his mouth a little. "What is it like at home my dear?" He asked, trying not to sound patronising but failing completely. "Simple I s'pose sir, and alot darker, we only have one candle in a room" Ismelda had almost finished her stew, she always seemed to eat like it was her last meal, Thoros liked that in a woman. "Just one candle!" he laughed loudly and other people joined in. "Do you miss it?" "Yes sir, I miss my family the most, my mother and father, my brothers and sisters" Ismelda looked cold, and small. He could see this wasnt a line of questioning that was going to end without someone in tears so he tried to change the subject. "Ah, but I bet you do not have cuisine like this at your home!" Thoros attempted to lighten the mood a little, he smiled at Ismelda, who smiled back, not a big smile, more a gentle curve at the sides of her mouth. "No sir, I s'pose not"

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schizowitchic · 3 months

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thing my mum is currently mad about: that i am not helping with the housework (ive literally been home all day with a migraine and period cramps so bad i can barely stand, as well as being exhausted bordering on sleep deprived from exams for the past week).

massive vent under the cut that goes super off topic.

tw for fatphobia and mild ableism and mentions of suicidality and poor mental health

like be more mad at my siblings who are not ill and perfectly capable of helping? before he left (hes away for the weekend) my dad was like "make sure to help ur mum this evening since im away so i cant" like hello? im literally ill at the moment. i get that my mum is super stressed and tired as well but like. right now. im literally physically ill. ive had almost ten full blown panic attacks in the past week.

ALSO ive tidied and hoovered my room, i collected wood from the shed in the garden from the fire, and changed all the hand towels over to clean ones so it's not like ive done nothing at all. ive emptied and refilled the dishwasher as well. plus whenever she's said "can you get this for me" ive gotten up to get it for her.

furthermore she hasn't asked us to do specific tasks so like. i have no idea what needs doing. im always available to do stuff if im directly asked (bc it's not like i can refuse without getting complained at all evening) so idk how im meant to telepathically know what house work she wants us to be doing. and even when we do help she always complains that we dont do it in the right way but never tells us what to do just complain about how incompetent we are

like im gonna be honest i just end up feeling less motivated to keep even my own room tidy. and that im constantly never enough for her. bc even when im sure ive done all the things i should. theres always something else i shouldve known how to do, or that bc ive never done it before that somehow erases that ive made process

for example she's always on at me about shaving and washing my face and etc. and like. im mentally ill. it is such a struggle to get up and get clean each day. and i was super proud of the fact that i now manage to clean my face at least once a day every day now. but that's not enough for her is it "you should be washing your face twice a day". and i was like "but surely one is better than the none it was before" and she just gave me a look like i was being ridiculous. and she's always on at me about shaving hair from my legs, getting rid of hair on my face and my back. i never was selfconscious about my appearance until she said i would be bullied for having hair, until she used the words "rolls of fat" to describe my stomach, until she said the slight bulges on the back of a dress were unflattering and would make people bully me, until she said that i needed to lose weight and exercise more. (for context on how ridiculously fatphobic this is. im skinny. i have high metabolism. but that's not enough for her)

the worst part is that she has no idea how harmful this stuff is. she thinks this is how to show she cares. that she's doing it for us. to the point where i feel bad putting this rant out onto the internet where like 5 people will see it. but then. just bc i know she loves me doesnr mean i feel like im loved.

like. im not even allowed to be tired or stressed without her saying how her job is so much worse so she has it so much worse (not like she witnessed my mental breakdown aged 15 not like she's accompanied me to mental health appointments for anxiety). we both had covid at the same time and whenever i was like "damn i feel like shit" well guess who felt like even more shit? and she always says how we get more days off if we're sick and it's like. you control how many sick days you have. plus she'll complain about how she never gets to rest and stuff but like i see her resting???? and also. im expected to still help out if we've gone on a long hike all day (i have severe joint pain) but im meant to be able to continue past that and not let it stop me

also neither her or my dad will say the word autism. it's always "neurodivergent" "neurodiverse" (why i not always a fan of "neurodivergent traits are x") they won't tell my siblings i cant discuss my pending diagnosis with them in front of my siblings like it's some bad thing that needs to be hidden. bro its just autism.

idk my main issue is that she complains about how i sit around on my phone/reading and it's like. well. do you even know how much i have to distract myself to stay alive. but she's really fucking annoying when she's concerned for my wellbeing (like toxic positivity. meditate do yoga solve all your problems type shit). lmao whatever whatever im going to uni this year

#personal #vent #dont touch #don't touch #probably delete later #delete later

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cogbreath · 4 months

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dump of my unorganized migraine riddled thoughts and feelings about recent things

maybe a lot of mistakes were made with the recent stuff with the callout stuff. i dont know. personally i never called anyone a pedophile or tried to insinuate anyone was and its distressing to hear about those accusations getting thrown around the way they were (are?) i dunno. people trying to develop some sort of epsteins list type thing it seems. fsct of the matter in terms of my own personal thoughts are that well its clear who is and isnt and really i just dont like the racists on here i dont like the way people came at some of the black users on here about it myself included. i cant speak for anyone else or say if they meant harm what they said but nonetheless lot of you folks are too eager to harm and attack black people regardless if they deserve criticism for what they said or not. tbh i dont even know what the situation is as it stands or where its gone. its become a mess that i dont like and cofnfuses me greatly. it should be simple. dont be transmisogynistic dont be racist and really you shouldn't claim people to be pedos unless you really are certain of that. i think leave people alone now to be honest unless theres really any risk of danger you know

ive tried to say what ive felt is the right thing and i still generally feel i did , there are people though who i will never like ans never forgive due 2 their racism. im not giving them support because of that. simple as. really its my right to.

really though im just one person

i hate the way people seem to act liek theres some sort of faction loyalty about this treating it like goddamn skyrim civil war

we all know how posts spread around here and its just illogical to say that all who ever reblogged a thing from someone means they r a supportyr of that person and their beliefs

though i think if its found out if that op isn't a safe person u should delete the post stop that shit from spreading i dont know why its suddenly hard for pepple to think this way when its undrrstood anytime a post from a fascist starts getting spread around

really im honestly backing out of discussions about what is and isnt okay or acceptable for anyone to sexualise or have a fetish for outside of the obvious things of its not okay to do that with non consenting people animals you know its literally simple easy stuff

whether or not someones into pregnant tf scenarios or mpreg or is a DL or any thing like that i really dont care and im not really interested in dissecting what it means or doesn't mean

im not an expert of sexual psychology and neither are you and i think you should leave people alone about it

i will never fw raceplay though and i have that right

and well honestly i think everyone has a right to not fw any kink its not illegal to dislike a kink or to be grossed out by it

and someone being grossed out by ur kink itsnt any form of hate on you as a human being either

just be nice 👍 everyone

and make sure everyone is safe

rememebr people generally mean well and generally dont want to hurt others needlessly

peoppe on here are quick to assume that every time someone does hurt someone on here its because they love it and are filled with hate and bigotry for their kind or something like that

i think because of the nature of the situations it is extra important to not assume the worst but rather ask people to clarify ?

i dont know

you people are smart and i think you know whats right and whats wrong pretty well

i hope

#unrebloggable because this is literally a dump of thoughts and stuff like sorry if u agree but its too unorganised for me to elt you share #you can share your thoughts in replies

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knucklegagging · 5 months

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I know this is mostly an anorexia tumblr account but tbh I havent been really struggling w my anorexia lately. Found old emaciated pictures and I think thats a lot of the reason why. Side by side my highest weight and lowest weight one looks weak and the other looks sexy. And Like... I wanna live. If i can. Especially now. And maybe a lot of this is that I was dealing shit no one is ever supposed to talk about but I have never been fat. I have been big busted hourglass booty girl slimthicc milkshake walking cunstain looking barbie body. And I have been emaciated. Thats so weird to really notice for the first time in my twenties. And it's not like I've been actively wanting to die or anything intense like that, but I didnt know life could feel good. And lately it really does. And my set range right now is 111 to 116. Which is healthy, as is my bfp. So i get that this is an anorexia tumblr account primarily... But maybe it doesnt always have to be? Idk tonight just feels really good. The girl I like seems to like me. And by that i mean shes made it clear she does in more ways than one. And frankly ive been a migraine and she still around. Its been a lot to adjust to. I have not been an easy person for her to be around. At least, i know I would be tired of my anxiety bullshit by now. She has so much patience and kindess and goodness in her soul. I feel like I have known her before, almost like memories from a dream that you woke up from too quickly. The taste of thoughts percolate my mouth with painful dripping sighs that crave to know her better, like filling in the blanks. Theres something so different, so unmistakable about the way that she is.

I dont know how to comfort myself at times because I cannot be running away in the opposite directiom but sticking my heels into blue on the treadmill next to her is terrifying. I get these scared moments thinking that I am going to ruin everything in one fell swoop w one stupid comment or being too hyper, talking too much, saying shit she wouldnt care about, moving too fast, not moving fast enough, not being whatever it is she expects of me. ...but yet she just roll w the punches. I dont want her to know how inexperienced i am w relationships. I dont want her to know anything bad thats happened to me and have it sour the interest that she has in me. I'm like paranoid that somehow she would find this blog and see my thoughts spelled out even though ik she won't. That wouldnt happen. But out of nowhere sometimes I just get scared like she will wake up one morning and decide I am not good enough. That I am too autistic or I have too much of a past behind me. That I have already been defiled and that makes me too much drama. I cant say that sentence out loud. I can't say many if any things out loud. I am always writing them down for her.

I am terrified about how to play my sleeves. At some point she will probably see my arms or thighs if we continue to spend time w each other. How the fuck is that all supposed to play out? Do i pretend its nothing and just rip the bandaid off? Wear a tank top when i see her next? That sounds dumb. There is no way to gradually unveil my body in ways that are not jarring when you have as many scars as I do. I like myself fine I just sometimes notice how much i do not know and that can psyche me out. But today has been good. Tonight has been happy. I am very much okay today. I just wish time would move faster slowly, so that i can know how we end up so that i can have a road map. I want thw answers for how to behave so that i dont cause any problems for her. If i could read her mind, if i could see the future, if i could know now what i will know then about whether i am going to make her life difficult... I am so scared. I am so happy. But I am also so scared.

Whats gonna happen when I am really visible and she can really see me? I've done so well at being invisible. With her I dont want to be. But it is all unknown and I'm a big ol scaredycat

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mattel-is-nobody · 5 months

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Time to brainrot about something I guess since I'm being kept up with a migraine.

Now you probably wouldn't think it from looking at me, but I am actually very, very much deeply obsessed with linguistics. To an unhealthy degree, some might say. And one of my favorite linguistic concepts is "This is a stupidly hilarious pun in Language A, but it makes no sense in Language B" The prime example of this is an old Sumerian/Babylonian joke that at this point has had several thousand video essays written about it. You know the one: "A dog walks into a tavern. 'I can't see anything!' he says. 'I'll open this one.'"

And who could forget the Greek Philosopher Chrysippus? In one of the accounts of his death, it is said that he got a bit too drunk at a party and, upon witnessing a donkey eating figs, he said "someone should get that donkey some pure wine to wash down the figs!". He then fucking died of laughter at his own joke. Beause apparently that was the funniest shit he'd ever seen.

Now neither of those make sense in any living language or modern culture, but the fact that it was written down at all means it made enough people laugh for it to be worth recording. And it's fun to look at living languages and see what makes the native speakers laugh but still utterly baffles everyone else. Even better, digital archeaologists in a thousand years are going to have a field day with this post if they ever stumble upon it, so here are a few of my favorite untranslatable puns: Hungarian: A man is pulled over by the police. The officer asks, "Are you drunk?". The man replies, "No, sir, Ivett is my wife"

Japanese: Why dont Hawaiians go to the dentist? Good teeth.

Finnish: "A bar and a screwdriver". That's the entire joke, by the way. Set up and punchline, apparently both right there, and in the original Finnish it's only two words. Apparently it's a reference to something? I'm just going to assume this is a thing you say and people laugh, much like "omae wa, mou shinderu"

Spanish: What fruit is the most patient? It's a pear. So fun fact, my Aunt is from Mexico, and I decided to tell her this joke in the original Spanish (which as a consequence of having a Mexican aunt, I speak pretty well). And I shit you not that as soon as the words "es pera" left my mouth, she let out the longest, heaviest, most world-weary sigh I have ever heard in my 20 years of life, before returning to the tamales she was making. I guess she now knows that my pun game has transcended to include her native language, and in that moment she was preparing herself for the ensuing decades of Spanish wordplay

Another from Japanese because they are gods of wordplay: "7-Up, Pepsi, Coca-Cola, they're all types of what?" "Soda?" "That's right!"

Chinese: "Who is Mi's mother?" "Hua, because peanuts". I took Chinese in high-school and I can verify that this is the shittiest pun I've ever seen, but the reddit user who posted it says "I am yet to find a single Chinese/Taiwanese person who does not find it hilarious"

Aussie English (which I'm including both for English rep and because Aussie slang is so markedly different that Brits and Americans are still unlikely to get it): "What's the difference between fat and cholesterol? You can't crack a cholesterol".

Danish: One sign says to another, "Are you married?" The other replies, "No, I'm divorced"

AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE: French: "He wished to be Caesar, but he died as Pompey" -- George Clémenceau, commenting on the death of President Felix Faure (I refuse to explain this one or give any further context, go look it up)

Oh and side note. Obviously, no world leader can speak every language, so interpreters are a necessity for negotiation. And of course, world leaders and diplomats are going to try the lighten the mood occaisionally with humor. But for negotiations between most countries, that's hard to do, because there are very few puns with much cross-linguistic utility. Sure, you have that one joke about where cats go when they die that works in English and most Romance languages, but for some more serious negotiations, the number of puns that would make sense in both languages is pretty close to zero, and may very well BE zero. So the question arises, how do interpreters deal with that? Of course there are a lot of possible methods, not all of which are good or even remotely efficient. You could just translate the pun word for word, but as evidenced by the fact that that's literally what I did above, it's not gonna work that well. Explaining the joke also isn't gonna fly, because as we all know, the second you explain a joke is the seond it becomes Not Funny Anymore. The method I've found that I think works best is just to say "They have said a pun that doesn't translate well to English. Laugh now." Which is funny not just because it works, but because it works amazingly. That person on the other end of the table (who we are assuming doesn't speak a lick of English) has no clue what the interpreter is saying, and so must assume their joke was translated faithfully. Sure, their interpreter might know depending on how the whole thing is set up, but considering the vetting process you have to go through to be an interpreter for the POTUS , I highly doubt anyone is going to risk national security over a joke being left untranslated. Both leaders have a laugh, everything ends on good terms, and we avoid nuclear annihilation for another few weeks.

#linguistics #language #puns #terrible puns #bad puns #rambles

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