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knightofthecourt · 4 years

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Love Bites - Chapter 1

Belatrice Gray was a TA at Belgrave University, working hard to stay on top of her marking and trying not to flunk her own studies, when a night out with her bff Randall and his roommates, changed everything.

Hamish Duke x OC fiction with fluff, romance and angst. OC description purposefully left out to allow for reader personalisation.

“I call this one a Wolf Bite.” Hamish set the tall glasses down in front of Randall and Bela, smiling as they both took a sip, and then another immediately.

“Haim, this is amazing.” Bela said as Randall nodded in agreement. Her lips quirked up in delight, causing a rush of warmth to radiate throughout Hamish’s chest.

He seated himself across from her, trying to ignore the sudden fluttering in his stomach.

Belatrice Gray - Bela, to her friends - had transferred to Belgrave’s Linguistics department from a college on the West Coast at the start of the year. After Randall was assigned as her tour guide during orientation they’d become fast friends and now the RA spent almost as much time with her as he did with Hamish, Lilith and Jack.

Though Hamish was usually reluctant to let the others bring friends back to the Den, when Randall finally introduced them to Bela he’d instantly made an exception for her. Not only was she sweet, funny and smarter than anyone else he’d met at Belgrave, she was also fair with the students under her guidance as a TA, and a loyal and caring friend to Randall - qualities that Hamish admired greatly.

As Bela became a semi-regular fixture at their nights out, nights in and revision sessions, Hamish had found himself making an effort to be around whenever Bela was present.

They’d spent many afternoons this semester studying in the Den’s comfy living room and as finals drew closer, Randall regularly recruited Bela for last minute cramming sessions. This afternoon it was Advanced Anatomy, with a side of Diagnostic Reasoning.

The dark haired man sighed and flopped down next to Bela on the shabby-but-comfortable sofa. She shifted as he jostled the cushions, almost knocking her book out of her hands.

From his armchair Hamish could see Bela reach over and run her hand up and down Randall’s arm in a soothing gesture. “You’ll get there.” She said, still focused on her work. “You know this stuff already, you’re just tired.”

Randall scoffed. “That’s easy for you to say. I can’t believe you dropped out of Pre Med - your grasp of the human body is truly astounding.”

“Yeah, my mother can’t either,” Bela joked.

“Another thing you and the Ham-ster have in common.”

Hamish winced at the nickname, but let it go. Randall was tired, after all.

Bela frowned, “A good grasp of the human body?”

Randall, who had taken this moment to have a sip of his drink, choked on his mouthful.

Hamish reached over to pat his friend on the back. “Disappointing our parents.” he bowed his head slightly, “I was Pre Law.”

“Really? “ Bela said, raising an eyebrow. “When I imagine you in a courtroom, I put you in handcuffs.”

“Is that something you imagine regularly?” Hamish flashed her a smile. She laughed.

“Jesus,” Randall muttered under his breath, just loud enough for Hamish’s enhanced hearing to pick up. “If I don’t choke to death on my drink, the sexual tension in this room is going to smother me.”

He leapt up from his chair, narrowly avoiding the pillow that sailed past his head. “Anyone want a snack? I need popcorn.”

As he headed to the kitchen Hamish turned his attention to Bela. She was chewing on the end of a pen, lost in the pages of her textbook. His breath hitched as the afternoon light filtering in through the windows caught the edges of her hair, lighting a halo around her.

“Bels?”

“Mmhm?”

“Randall mentioned you’re swamped with work at the moment?”

“Oh?” Bela made a face. “Yeah, Professor Liebernacht dumped all of his marking on me again - big surprise. I have to grade ninety Syntactic Theory papers by the end of the week.”

“How about we mark papers together tonight?” Hamish tried to keep his voice light and even to disguise the hammering in his chest. “I have practise tests to get through, it’s going to take hours. Maybe we could get a take-out, keep each other company?”

“Oh.” She looked up from her book. “Yeah, that would be great actually. As long as you make me one of your signature cocktails too?”

A smile lit up his face. “I can make you as many cocktails as you like, I think we probably both need a drink this far into finals season.”

“Great idea Ham-and-cheese!” Randall said, returning with a large bowl clutched to his chest. “Hey Lil,” He yelled up the stairs, “Big night out tonight with Hamish and Bela, let’s blow off some steam.”

“What? No, that’s not what I-” Hamish began in protest.

“I’m in.” Lilith appeared in the hallway. “But I get to choose the bar this time, the last one Bela chose was lame.”

“Hey,” Bela objected.

“Cool, I’ll tell Jack and Alyssa.” Randall sat down, setting the popcorn on the coffee table in front of him, and pulled out his phone. “Meet here at 8pm?”

Bela looked from Randall to Hamish, who was glaring daggers at his friend. She shrugged.

“Great!” Randall’s phone buzzed. “They’re in. Thanks, Haim. We could all do with a break tonight - your papers can wait until tomorrow, can’t they?”

Hamish bit back his disappointment. “I guess they’ll have to.”

- - - - -

“Dude, you have to stop.”

Randall placed a hand firmly over Hamish’s, stilling the older man’s fingers. He’d been drumming his nails on their table for the past ten minutes and even with the music in the club drowning out the sound, it was extremely irritating.

“What’s up with you tonight?”

“Nothing.” Hamish lied, freeing his hand from Randall’s grasp.

Randall’s suspicion grew as he followed Hamish’s gaze to the bar where Jack, Bela and Alyssa were ordering a round of shots.

“Fine.” Hamish groaned, when he noticed Randall surveying Bela. “It’s just weird. I asked Bela on a date and now we’re all hanging out together.”

Randall’s eyes almost popped out of his head. “What?! You finally asked her out? When the hell did that happen?”

“This afternoon. I asked her to hang out tonight.”

“But did you really?” Lillith smirked over the top of her glass. “I’m not sure she realised you were actually asking her out.”

“When did this happen?” Randall frowned “And how come you know about it when I don’t Lil?”

“Duh. I’m a werewolf.” She shrugged. “I can hear everything in that house.”

“You were there, Randall.” said Hamish, glancing over at Bela who, thankfully was still out of earshot.

“Oh.” Randall’s eyes widened. “That was a date? Hamish, I totally blocked you!”

“He blocked himself.” Lillith shook her head. “In what world is asking someone to mark papers with you a date?”

“I know.” Hamish rubbed his neck. “I thought it might be a good jumping off point? Actually spending some time alone together.”

A smile worked its way across Randall’s face. “Well if it’s alone time you want, you only had to ask!”

“Randall, don’t” Hamish hissed.

“Don’t what?” Jack asked, placing a tray of shots down in front of his friends. Bela slipped into the booth next to Hamish, brushing his thigh with hers as she slid across to make space for Alyssa and Jack.

Randall grabbed a shot and threw it back. “Jack, Alyssa - Lillith was just telling me how much she wanted to dance.” He said, barely pausing to take breath.

“No I - Ow.” Lillith bared her teeth at Randall. She jerked her leg out of his reach, massaging the sore spot on her left shin. “Yeah,” she agreed, “I totally want to dance. On the dance floor. With people. Hamish you stay here and look after our shit.”

She grabbed Jack’s arm and yanked him from the booth before he could pick up his drink. Randall followed her, gesturing for Alyssa to join them.

Bela and Hamish sat in stilted silence for a moment before Hamish cleared his throat. “You can go and dance if you want to, I don’t mind looking after everything.”

“Actually, I’m good here.” Bela said.

Hamish’s cheeks glowed as he returned her easy smile.

Bela was enjoying spending time with Randall and his friends but she couldn’t deny that she’d rather be grading papers with Hamish tonight. At first Randall has requested that they hang out at the Den as it was quieter than the dorms and closer to the campus than her apartment, but recently it had been at Bela’s insistence that they’d studied there. Bela hadn’t been sure if Randall realised it was because she wanted an excuse to spend time with Hamish, but his not so subtle attempt at leaving them alone to go ‘dancing’, had pretty much just confirmed that he knew about her crush.

Bela cringed. Hopefully Hamish didn’t realise that their friend was playing matchmaker, that would just be too embarrassing.

“Bels?” Hamish was staring at her in confusion. Bela realised he’d been talking to her this whole time.

“Sorry,” she stuttered, “what were you saying?”

As he leaned forward in his chair the club’s strobe lights cast his face in shadow, picking out the contours of his high cheekbones and strong jaw. Bela’s gaze followed the line up from his neck, to his full lips and then up to his eyes, which were trained on her.

“I was asking if you wanted to hang out tomorrow instead. I know I said grading papers but we could do something else if you want? There’s a new sci-fi film on at the student lounge or we could go out to eat.” He tipped his head towards the dance floor. “Lillith informed me that grading papers isn’t really a date activity.”

Bela felt a well of happiness bubble up. So Hamish was actually asking her out? She hadn’t been sure before.

“She’s wrong,” Bela shook her head. “Anything can be a date if you’re with the right person.” As a smile flooded Hamish’s face her lips turned up to mirror his.

“You know you haven’t said yes, yet.”

Bela paused, as if considering his proposal. “Actually, I’m hungry now. Do you want to get some-”

“Yes,” Hamish interrupted before she finished. He beamed at her. “Let’s go, I’ll tell the others we’re leaving.”

“Great,” said Bela, “I’m just going to grab my coat. I’ll meet you outside.”

As they made their way across the club neither of them noticed the figure watching them from the other side of the room.

- - - - -

If you ignored the distant bass leaking from the building’s windows it could almost be considered peaceful out here, Bela thought. She inhaled the fresh, cool air, enjoying how it chased away the faint buzz in her temples, and leaned against a wall, scrolling through her phone as she waited for Hamish.

“Hey,” a voice broke through the night. “You’re Bela, right?”

Bela turned to find a young man next to her. He was wearing a Belgrave t-shirt under a fitted plaid shirt, and his dirty blonde hair was cropped in a trendy cut. Despite looking like every other rich, entitled frat boy on Bela’s course, as he grinned up at her his face was pleasant.

“Uh, yeah,” Bela frowned in confusion. He looked vaguely familiar. “Do I know you?”

“Tanner Jeffries - I’m new to the Linguistics department.” He held out a hand, shaking hers firmly when she placed her palm in his.

He chuckled lightly, making his cheeks dimple. “I know what you’re thinking - why oh, why would anyone join Linguistics? Well, I’m a glutton for punishment. I just couldn’t resist meeting the notorious Professor Liebernacht.”

“He’s the worst,” Bela confirmed, with a small laugh “I’ll be surprised if we have any students left after this year.”

“Yeah, you should see his reviews on Rate My Prof.”

“I know,” Bela couldn’t help but return his smile. “Half of those are from his TAs.”

Tanner chuckled again. He reached up to rub the side of his neck and shot her an apologetic look. “Hey, I know this is a bit weird but my car’s not starting. I was going to ask for a flashlight in the club so I can check out the engine but… could I borrow the light on your phone. It’ll just take a minute.”

“Uh-” Bela hesitated. She threw a brief glance over her shoulder at the club’s entrance. “Yep, sure. No problem.”

The parking lot beside the club was eerily vacant, considering how many people were packed into the heaving room. As they walked towards the only car there, a blue four wheel drive in the corner of the lot, Tanner dropped behind her, digging around his pockets for his keys.

Bela turned to the car, “Ok, where’s the latch-”

As Tanner’s hand clamped over her face she let out a startled shriek.

Bela’s thoughts filled with panic. She acted on instinct, struggling against his hold as Tanner’s other arm twisted around her waist, almost lifting her off the floor. Her fingers scrambled to find purchase, finally catching around his shirt, which she pulled sharply, trying to throw him off balance.

He grunted with effort, blocking her mouth to stifle her screams. “You don’t need to make this - urgh - any harder. Dormitum Dimittatur.”

Bela slumped in his arms.

- - - - -

As Hamish predicted, Randall was incredibly happy that he was taking Bela out to eat. He’d thrown his arms around Hamish’s neck and tipsily mumbled about how his best friends were falling in love for almost ten minutes, until Lillith had taken pity on the older man and peeled Randall off him, promising they’d all meet back at the Den in a few hours.

Hamish hurried out of the club, keen to find Bela and start their date, but she was nowhere to be found.

He frowned. It wasn’t like Bela to just up and leave without telling them. Even if she’d changed her mind about going out with him she would have just said - wouldn’t she?

After pacing in front of the club for a few moments he managed to pick up the faint scent of her perfume on the cold night breeze - sometimes being a werewolf was really useful. He followed the trail around the side of the building, frowning again when he reached the parking lot.

This doesn’t make sense, he thought, an uneasy feeling settling in his stomach. They’d walked to the club and none of them were in a state to drive anywhere tonight. Maybe the alcohol was throwing off his game. He pulled out his phone and dialed Bela’s number, silently thanking Tundra as his enhanced hearing picked up the sound of vibration.

As Hamish followed it to the edge of the lot, his breathing quickened and the unease grew into dread.

“Oh no,” he whispered, kneeling beside the glowing object.

It was Bela’s phone, lying face up in the gravel.

#the order #hamish duke #hamish duke x reader #hamish duke x oc #randall carpio #lillith bathory #the knights of saint christopher #werewolves #love bites

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cynthiaandsamus · 3 years

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Bulbamun’s Top Ten Simpsons Episodes!

So now that my new smart tv has Disney+ on it I’ve been watching a lot of Simpsons lately and started thinking about just what are my favorites, this is by no means a definitive list, I may change my mind immediately after posting this but I do tend to hover around the same era when I watch and I just thought about which ones I keep coming back to or otherwise stick with me

10. Round Springfield

So this one fucking makes me cry every time, I don’t watch it as much as I have most of the others on this list but watching Bleeding Gums Murphy die and leave Lisa so distraught always gets me, they do the crazy James Earl Jones cloud ending and it never fails to have me in tears by the end. Also Bart’s small character arc with Lisa believing he’s telling the truth when he wrecks his appendix leading into the end is a very nice touch (and is something that happens in reverse later on in the list).

9. Lemon of Troy

On the other end of things, Lemon of Troy just always makes me feel kind of good, it’s really funny, there’s so many subversion gags that work really well and it’s a neat little adventure story that changes the setting up a bit. Shelbyville is mentioned a lot in various episodes so it’s neat to just go there and see the people are just as weird and freaky as in Springfield despite Shelbyville always seeming to be the better option in most conversations. Also, lemon-shaped rocks.

8. Homer Badman

So this is here for a couple reasons, first of all the Candy Expo in the beginning is an amazing setpiece and I love all the gags they get out of all the crazy candy convention shenanigans. And then the episode just kind of pivots and we get a pretty dire take on media sensationalism that just gets more and more relevant every year. It’s a weirdly nuanced take too since none of the original parties are particularly at fault since they both don’t have the full story but they get swept up into a media whirlwind. (Though the more I think about it, Homer DID still technically grab the girl’s butt even if it wasn’t intended as sexual harrassment there’s still a case to be made that he did do it, but she seems fine to drop it after finding out about Gummi Venus De Milo so I guess it’s okay)

7. Lisa’s Substitute

This is the other episode that never fails to make me cry, like every time I watch this episode I end up having a huge headache from crying so much. This one admittedly relies a lot on its ending and isn’t quite as funny or touching throughout but what an ending, everything from the train scene and Lisa getting the note to how the family wraps up at home and Homer proves he can be a good parent in his own way while relating to all three of his kids on various levels, it’s just really great.

6. Homer the Heretic

So this one is on the list for its atmosphere (and it won’t be the last one) I really freaking love how it sells the lazy Sunday morning feel in the first half, how Homer crafts a fun day off for himself with all these silly little events and snacks and such (which is also how I spend my days off so it probably hit a little close to home). The religious commentary is pretty good too, Lisa the Skeptic was very close to making the list for how it handled respecting people’s faith even when you don’t share it but I kinda like how oddly inclusive this message is for a show that’s usually pretty Protestant-focused, it kind of gets to a message about the intention of faith being more important than the dogma, but also that something like church can still have value.

5. Bart on the Road

This one and the next one are more atmosphere pieces, admittedly the vaporwave meme may have influenced my opinion on this a bit but I find myself coming back to this episode a lot just for the breezy attitude it has about the whole road trip aesthetic and how well Bart organizes this thing on the fly even though none of them have any idea what they’re doing, plus Nelson and Martin are always good to drag along together (see Lemon of Troy) and Lisa’s subplot about connecting with Homer and that being the final test that connects it to the resolution of Bart’s plot I always thought was really cute.

4. Bart’s Comet

Like I said, this is another atmosphere pick. The parts of this one that always get me are the beginning when Bart’s getting up at 4am and everything’s so quiet and still and the day hasn’t really started yet, and then the quiet anxiety that hangs over the town as their waiting for the comet to come crashing down (which if I remember high school earth science it’s not a comet if it enters the atmosphere but whatever). It’s got some really funny jokes and a variety of townspeople to play off each other and a really sweet and poignant ending with Flanders but the early morning scenes and the apocalyptic dread are my favorites here.

3. Bart Sells his Soul

I guess I’m a sucker for the theological/philosophical episodes of classic Simpsons because I love this episode. Just like in an inverse of Round Springfield, this one wraps up with Lisa giving Bart something that solves his grief, and her point about Bart earning his soul through desperation and effort and prayer is really touching. The Moe stuff for the B-plot is really cute and I like the setting of turning Moe’s into a TGI Fridays type deal, plus the oddly heartbreaking scenes of Bart walking around feeling like something is missing, it’s all really good and wraps up in a surprisingly touching way.

2. One Fish, Two Fish, Blowfish, Blue Fish

I feel like nobody talks about this episode as much as they should. Like it’s an episode about Homer Simpson facing his mortality and how that cuts to the core of his relationships with literally everyone in his life. It strips him bare and makes him thoughtful and introspective in a way we don’t really get to see while we take a quick jaunt through all his connections he’s made with the people closest to him. The scene of Homer mustering up all his dignity and listening to The Bible on tape and waiting to die really kinda touches me, I remember first seeing it as a kid and wondering what was going to happen, I knew they couldn’t kill Homer but part of that moment really sold it in a way I wasn’t expecting and approached mortality in a way that few others that use this stock plot do.

1. 22 Short Films About Springfield

Okay, Steamed Hams, you know it, I know it, Steamed Hams is one of the funniest things The Simpsons has ever done, but the whole episode is pretty great. The fact that it doesn’t have a central plot means that it can basically just be a gag factory and get a ton of variety, sweeping around the whole town and just punching in joke after joke of varying types. And despite its name and structure, it doesn’t feel like they’re isolated vignettes, it does feel like they’re going places since the shorts are decently tied together with good visual segues and some plots that continue throughout like Lisa’s hair story. Aside from the Cletus story and maybe a couple others there aren’t any hard cuts that divide one of the stories from another and it’s just really funny. Seems kind of weird to put all the touching and memorable episodes on the list and then top it off with a nonsense collection of hilarious gags but here we are.

#ooc #long post #The Simpsons #Top Ten

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

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Survey #322

“you will hear it when your god cries / you will see it when the sun dies / upon the altars of change”

What is your favorite nickname that you’ve had? "Bee," from my old best friend. I don't want others calling me it, though. Where did you go on the best date you’ve been on? A big arcade. It was a super fun double-date. Have you ever gotten a professional massage? No, and I don't want one. It'd be so awkward. What’s your favorite milkshake flavor? Chocolate. What act would you be most likely to perform in a talent show? I got nothin'. If you had braces, do you wear your retainers still? I don't. If you had braces, have your teeth moved since you got them off? Yep, because of the whole "not wearing my retainer" thing. Whose was the first baby shower you remember attending, and for what baby? I'm unsure. Possibly my sister's for her first daughter. Do you know anyone personally who’s lost a child? Many people. When was the last time you did something that felt like rebellion? So every now and again, I get a massive craving for soda at night, so I grab one from the kitchen and can hear my sleeping mother rightfully nagging me about it, haha... What is one present you got for your last birthday? Ashley got me this really cool skull bank that says "tattoo fund" on it, aha. I love it. What is one thing that you took to show and tell as a kid? I have a clear memory of bringing a Snorlax plushie one day. Do you remember losing your first tooth? Not my first, no. Are you afraid to pop a balloon? Not really, but it's kinda easy to make me jump just a lil bit when one is popped. When was the last time you laughed when you shouldn’t have? I don't know. Which was better: the first The Lion King or the second? That is fucking HARD. I adore both, but I think the original is slightly better. Do any of your grandparents have a tattoo? I'm pretty sure none of them did. Do you believe that your pets feel love towards you? My cat, definitely. As for my snake, I'm aware that snakes' brains simply aren't developed enough for love, but she clearly trusts me. Are you proud of your body? Fuck no. I'm humiliated by it every waking moment. Watermelon or cherries? I don't like either, but if I had to pick, watermelon. Favourite brand of cookies? I don't really have a favorite brand. Have you ever stuck gum under a desk/chair? No, that shit grosses me out. When shopping at a grocery store, do you return your cart or just leave it? Return your goddamn cart. What is one thing you’d never want your parents to find out? Uhhhh. I guess places I've "done it." When you were little, did you like Dr. Suess books? I did. Do you like eating out at restaurants? Yeah; at least, before Covid. What was your least favorite year of your life so far? Fuck 2016 into the next millenium. Do you like fried bologna? I haven't had it in so long that I don't really remember the taste. I think I would. Have you spent money on a game online? Yeah, very briefly with WoW. Mom was nice enough to refresh my subscription after the breakup (Jason paid for it prior), but from then on, I was rich enough in-game to use monthly game tokens to "pay." Do you put a line through your "7"s? Yes. What about your "Z"s? Also yes. Do you like cold pizza? Yeah, yummy. Do you like broccoli and cheese? Yessss. Toaster or toaster oven? We've always used a toaster oven. What are you most known for? Being artsy, I guess. Do you have any reputations? What are they? *shrug* What was the last thing to leave you speechless? No clue. What is the curviest part of your body? Well, I'm overweight, so it's difficult to tell where I'm naturally curvy... but I guess my hips. Even when I was at a perfectly healthy weight though, I don't think I was exceptionally curvy anywhere. What is your opinion on sex change? You are entirely deserving to feel comfortable in your own body. If you’re still a virgin, how important is your virginity to you? I'm not, though I thought I was when we were together, when we were really just using a loophole. It was a denial thing BECAUSE my virginity was so important to me. If you have lost it already, do you regret it? No. Would you take a break after graduating from high school (like, postpone going to college for a year or so)? I didn't. What regret keeps coming back to haunt you daily? Things I said to Jason. If you could cure yourself of one allergy, what would it be? Pollen. Would you ever post a picture of yourself crying on social media? No. Have you ever held a newborn baby? Yeah, my most recent niece I actually held. I don't THINK I held Aubree or Ryder as newborns because I was so afraid of not doing it right and hurting them. Do you know anyone who has twins? Yeah. Are you following in the career path of any family members? No. What is your favorite country in Europe? Germany. How many times have your comments been top comments on YouTube? A few times. I rarely ever comment, but if I do, it's because I feel like I really have something worth saying. Would you ever wear a wig? I'm not opposed to it. Do you like the moon or sun more? The moon. Do you like turkey or ham more? Ham. Have you ever slapped someone’s butt? Yes. Do you think dimples are ugly? I think they're cute, actually. Have you ever deleted Facebook friends for a significant other? No. Have you ever spent the night in jail? No. Do you consider yourself a good kisser? I assume I am from experiences. Do you watch Pewdiepie? Not anymore, no. His current content doesn't interest me. The most recent thing I watched was his playthrough of The Last of Us 2, because I adore the first game and definitely wanted to see him play the sequel. I think he's pretty funny and have no personal issues against him, though then again I am so uninvolved in the fandom that I have no idea if he's done something stupid again. Do you like "Despacito?" Haha, my mind went to The Dark Den's bearded dragon before the song... I'm not a fan of it, no. Did you ever color your hair pink? No, but I absolutely want to dye it pastel pink one day. :( I even edited a picture of me "testing" different hair colors out, and pastel pink looked suuuuper pretty. Do you drink energy drinks? No, they're too strong for my taste. Do you have any subscribers on YouTube? I don't now how many I have, but I know it's below 100. Do you have a Steam account? Yeah. Have you ever played Five Nights at Freddy’s? No, but I enjoy the franchise. I'm not totally clear on all the lore, though. Do you like religion? Quite honestly, no. Do you swear in front of children? No. What is the next craft you are going to make? There's no telling. I don't really do crafts. What was your favorite Backstreet Boys song? Maybe "The Call." Favorite *N Sync song? I don't remember enough of them, at least not right now. Which of those two bands did you like best? The BSB, baby. Do you learn choreography easily? When I danced, I'd say I learned at a fairly average pace. What’s your favorite candy to receive on Halloween? Reeseeeeeee's. <3 Do you have a bobblehead? No. Have you ever had a lead role in a play? No. Have you ever been insulted or called names by a significant other? No. I wouldn't tolerate that shit. What’s your favorite movie battle scene? Oh man, idk. Maybe something from Troy, though I honestly barely even remember the movie by now, haha. Have you ever been to a same-sex wedding? No, actually. Who takes care of your pet(s) when you’re out of town? Hypothetically, one of my sisters would come to feed and water Roman and clean his box. I'm certain I couldn't talk either into spraying Venus' cage, though... What was the last thing you wrote down on paper? Some group work during therapy. Did you have a Walkman when you were a kid? No. What’s your favorite recipe you’ve come up with? Oh dear, I don't make those. Do you like celery? Yuck, no. By what age could you swallow pills? I dunno. A normal age. Do you like to drink alot of water? I need to drink more. :/ I've gotten better, though. For years, I literally never drank water. How I even survived, idk. How many times have you gone fishing? Countless times. Ever been to a roller-skating rink? Yeah. I loved having bday parties there as a lil'un. What do you refer to your mother as? (Mom, momma, mommy) Mom, Ma, and Mama. Have you ever swam in the ocean? Yeah, multiple times. What is the last movie that made you cry? I think the remake of The Lion King. What would you like to swim in other than water? Nothing? If you could uninvent one thing what would you chose? Damn, just one? Maybe cigarettes? Have you ever read someone's diary? Absolutely not. I respect people's privacy. Have you ever played in a waterfall? No, but that'd be dope. Who has inspired you the most in your life? Probably Mark. Is there a place where everyone who lives near you tends to hang out? Idk. Teens sure do love to hang out at Sonic, though, reving their stupid fucking trucks. Does your alarm clock wake you with music, or with an annoying buzz sound? Music. Did you make it all the way through the Oregon Trail game? Yes; I was obsessed with those as a kid. Lions and tigers and bears, oh my! Which one are you more scared of? I feel like being alone with a tiger would scare me most. Though let's be real, I'd probably try to pet it. Have you ever changed your favorite color? From what to what? It was originally red, but then became pink when I actually understood it was its own color. Then it was maroon forever, and now it's back to pink. On a scale of 1-10, how competitive are you? Eh, 4-6? It depends on the situation, I guess. At what age did your have your most memorable birthday? My 21st, because I was in the psych hospital for it. Yes or no: Guys in skinny jeans? Yeah, man. Yes or no: Girls with dreads? Some people can pull it off. Have you ever attended a themed b-day party? What was the theme? Oh yeah, plenty. Do you have any Eminem on your iPod/MP3 player? I do. Has anybody ever given you a promise ring? No. What do you think about putting ‘spinners’ on cars? So long as they're not too distracting, I don't care. Do what you want with your car - again, so long as it is not disruptive. What celebrity do you wish would have a big comeback? I wish poor Britney Spears could catch a goddamn break and be happy again. She's a legend that doesn't deserve to feel like a puppet. Were you outdoors or indoors more as a kid? I'd say there was a pretty even split. Do you or have you ever owned a horse? No, but I LOVE horses. Have you ever had a relationship that began via text? (weird, I know, but it happens…) Most of my relationships started through a text message. Did you believe in unicorns as a small child? I don’t think so. Would you ever date a guy with longer hair than yourself? Yeah; I have short hair anyway, and I also like long hair on guys. Do you watch the show Wizards of Waverly Place? I used to love that show. Have you ever been to the rainforest? No; humidity aside though, that would be so amazing. Bats are not spooky or are they? I think they're precious. Do you like the song "Womanizer?" I sure do, actually. Do you like ice cream cake? Not really, but I'll eat it. Do you know how to change a tire? Nope. What kind of headphones do you have? Just cheap earplugs. Do you experiment a lot with new looks on yourself? No. What were some fun experiments you did in science class as a kid? Dissecting a frog was my favorite, and doing the same with an owl pellet was also very cool. What was the last strong emotion you felt? Guilt. I lied to get out of group therapy early because I was just NOT feeling it whatsoever that day, and I hate lying. Do you use dry shampoo between washes? No. Have you ever lived with someone you didn’t get along with? No. What types of animals have you had as pets? Jeez, what haven't we had... We've had cats, dogs, snakes, rats, gerbils, a rabbit, hamsters, lizards, fish, guinea pigs... Hell, I'm probably forgetting one or two. Can you name three good things about your most recent ex? She's so creative, a real advocate for proper reptile education and appreciation, and very kind. Name three bands/artists that you hate. Uhhh The Talking Heads, Bob Dylan, and The Police. What’s the best memory you have of your father? Playing softball with him in the front yard, and when he taught me to ride a bike. Should tattoos be meaningful? You get a tattoo for whatever reason you damn well want. I don't plan on all of mine to be meaningful. Some stuff I just want because I think it's cool. Are you afraid of the dark? No. Have you ever been through a trap door? No. What's the most recent good news you’ve heard? Hm. Who was the last person in your family to have a baby? My older sister. When’s the last time you used the microwave? Last night. What’s the worst thing in your life right now? Financial struggles. Have you ever owned a tire swing? No. Does anyone you know own a bird that can talk? No. Have you ever been someplace tropical? Yeah, Florida. Have Jehovah'ss witnessess ever called to your door? Yep. when was the last time you went to mass/church? I have no idea. It's been many years. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? Thank heavens no.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''altaer" by 3teeth

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swaps55 · 4 years

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What's your favourite character to write?

Wheeee, I’m gonna cheat and give you more than one.

Let’s get the obvious one out of the way. Kaidan is a filthy soft-hearted paragon with integrity coming out his ears, loves carefully but deeply, is tough but kind, has been through trauma and hardship but found his way through to the other side. He’s steadfast, warm, funny if you pay attention, and the type of character who gives an excellent opportunity to observe others. So, basically, if you wanted to trap a Swaps in the wild, Kaidan Alenko is the friggin’ template you should work from to do it, Plus, when he’s with Shepard I get to go ham with old soldier imagery, which I have discovered is one of my absolute favorite things. Not surprisingly, I write Kaidan eagerly and often. Virtually all of my mShenko is exclusively from his POV. When I do it from Shepard’s it loses its magic somehow.

The less obvious one? ASHLEY. I was never satisfied with Ashley in the games. I knew what I wished she would be, but the games never quite...gave me that. So a goal for me when I sat down to write Exordium was to create the Ashley that I’d wanted to see in the games. How surprised was I when all of her scenes basically wrote themselves? She was effortless for me to write - in fact I had to be very careful that she didn’t dominate POV characters when she shared scenes with them. She’ so fun and freeing to write. Loud, funny, confident, uninterested in worrying about what people think of her. She just...does her thing. And doesn’t apologize for it. It’s a blast.

Honorable mention? Garrus. I love Garrus. I love him as a romance, I love him as Shepard’s best friend. In my stories I work his snark and sense of humor, and I’m always happy with the results. I very badly want to write more ME2-era fic, where he’s got Shepard’s back no matter how dark it gets, and in my ME2 canon things get really dark for Shepard. (Not Fine is my favorite example.)

Couple of snippets that I love for each character:

Kaidan, from Celestial Navigation:

Shepard’s body is familiar, but only as it functions in a hardsuit. Where it’s weak. Where it’s strong. How long before his amp overheats, how much punishment his barrier can take before he’s spent and vulnerable. He knows Shepard’s weak left hip – still weak, even after he’s been rebuilt from the ground up, because the man doesn’t know how to roll to the right every now and then – and how to protect him from it.

Now instead of gauntleted hands searching ablative for a breach to seal, Kaidan’s fingers skate over bare skin, find where it’s whole and where it’s broken. Instead of checking his biofeed and reading Shepard’s pulse he feels it under his palm, flesh and blood instead of numbers in his HUD.

This is better. This is much better.

Ashley, from Exordium, Chapter 24 - Corpora Numerandum:

When Kaidan crawled his way back to groggy consciousness, he discovered he wasn’t alone. In the dark confines of Dr. Chakwas’ office there was a small rectangular glow of light from a datapad. The smell of eggs and sausage filled his nostrils, eliciting a growl from his empty stomach. The vice around his skull had loosened into a dull, throbbing ache. With a groan he rolled over and reached up to thumb the switch of a small lamp on Dr. Chakwas’ desk. In the sudden light he saw a pair of neon green boots propped up on the frame of his cot.

“Good morning, Sunshine,” Williams drawled, not looking up from her datapad. “Did you know Dr. Chakwas likes celebrity gossip? I think she has half a dozen entertainment mags on this thing.” She swiped at the screen, head cocked to the side with one eyebrow raised. “Apparently Varesh Onek and Chan’Dren Yara vas Naroma of Fleet and Flotilla fame may be a real life couple.” She looked up at Kaidan. “See, they’re assuming I have any idea what the hell Fleet and Flotilla is.”

“What are you doing here?” Kaidan replied, sitting up slowly as he waited for his brain to shake off some of the cobwebs. The aftermath of a migraine felt a little like what he imagined coming off a three day ryncol bender might be like.

She lifted a tray off Dr. Chakwas’ desk and removed the cover with a flourish. Beneath it was a steaming pile of scrambled eggs, sausage, and pancakes dripping with syrup. The smell was heavenly. She smirked. “The Doc said you’d be coming around soon, and I hear biotics like to binge eat.”

“You brought me breakfast?” he said, surprisingly touched by the gesture.

She raised her chin proudly. “Reconstituted it myself. I figured I’d save you the trouble of shambling through the mess to get some grub. Someone might mistake you for a plant zombie.”

“How chivalrous,” he said dryly.

“Right. Cute. Because of the knight in shining armor comment. I get it.” She pulled the tray out of reach. “You can’t have this now.”

Garrus, from Noel:

“I bet there’s a few turian traditions that sound more than a little odd when you try to explain them to outsiders,” Liara prods.

“As odd as a single person visiting the homes of an entire planet in one evening?” Garrus asks. “Liara, we’re talking physics here.”

She gives him a withering look. “Ok. Then tell me about the turian belief in Turak Selar.”

His mandibles twitch. “You mean the spirit that snatches the souls of ill-mannered children and traps them in lizards?”

Liara is silent.

“How is that weird?”

She sighs and turns back to the monitors. “Christmas seems like a multi-layered tradition. There are even hints of fertility rituals in there, though I’m not sure humans still acknowledge those origins.”

Garrus shudders. “I really hope fertility has nothing to do with this.”

“The Christmas tradition appears to have both religious and folkloric derivations,” EDI’s offers helpfully over the comm. “The human Christian faith honors it as a birth commemoration for the offspring of their deity. The occasion is marked with religious services, re-enactments of the child’s birth—”

The turian’s mandibles flail in alarm.

“—communal singing of relevant songs and reuniting of families. However secular influences appear prominently throughout the holiday’s history as well. The date coincides closely with a winter solstice. Several related ancient customs therefore have been adopted as part of the festivities, such as interior decorations with greenery, feasting, and gift giving.”

The AI’s voice quirks with interest on the last comment.

There’s a knock on the door, and Tali enters. “You said you wanted to see me?”

“For solidarity,” Garrus quips. “Shepard and the rest of the humans apparently neglected to tell us they secretly worship an immortal fat man who rides around in a hover sled dragged by hapless mammals, distributing presents to young children by breaking into their homes.”

Tali is so still Liara feels out the room’s gravity well to see if she’s somehow accidentally put her in a stasis field. “Is…that a joke?”

“No, Tali,” Garrus says with a sigh. “We’re actually friends with these people.”

#rpgwarrior4824 #swaps replies #mememe #meme replies #how writing is written #YAY FOR ASKS #thank you!

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11-ish · 6 years

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christmas eve

genre: polyamorous!au, fluff pairing: jungkook x reader x taehyung synopsis: you didn’t mind being bothered while preparing for Christmas when your boys are being affectionate

1433 words. Merry Christmas y’all! :-)

“I would like to order two ham and cheese pizzas and one pepperoni? Uhm…that will take how long? … Hopefully before Christmas?...Yes, thank you.” You immediately hang up the call and put down the phone on the marble counter, as you continued on slicing the ham. You watched as the pasta were boiling, time to time, you would stir it and let it soften. Five hours before Christmas. Everything was going well, preparations were almost ready, just in time to greet Christmas.

The steak that you marinated was almost ready, and so was the whole chicken that you’ve put inside the oven. An hour before it was ready for your liking. Smoke was spreading around your kitchen, and you’ve opened the window to lessen the smoke. You knew Taehyung and Jungkook didn’t like smoke too much, that’s why they always stay away when you’re cooking especially that involves a lot of smoke. You wiped the sweat dripping on your forehead as you watched the pasta simmer. When you’ve estimated that it had soften already, you immediately turned off the induction stove, and let the water drain.

You gently poured the pasta on the white bowl, and quickly got back to the two sauce you have already prepared. You were making carbonara and spaghetti, since Taehyung and Jungkook loves them, respectively. You were glad that you were already used in cooking big servings since Taehyung and Jungkook would always invite their friends, and they usually have big stomachs. It was also a good thing that you were already prepared with the sauce because you usually take ages in looking for the right taste. You divided both the pasta with two medium bowls, and started pouring the carbonara and spaghetti sauce in its respective bowls. You jumped out of surprise when you’ve felt warm arms wrapped around your stomach.

You snapped your head and smiled at Taehyung’s sleepy appearance. His eyes were half-lidded, and it looks like he was trying his best to stay awake. You chuckled, and gently patted his cheeks. “It’s still not Christmas, Tae. Sleep more.” You said, as you stirred the spaghetti sauce on the pasta noodles. Taehyung removed his arms wrapped around your waist, you glance at him and smiled when he also started stirring the carbonara sauce in the other bowl. Unlike Jungkook, Taehyung is not a really good cook, so you appreciate his effort in helping you, lessening your work load. “Are you hungry Tae?” You asked and you laughed when he immediately nodded. You scooped a small portion of a spaghetti sauce, and lifted the spoon in front of his mouth, so Taehyung could get some taste. He smiled, pleased with the taste and proud that you got it right.

“Is Jungkook asleep?” You asked as you finished stirring the sauce in the pasta noodles. Taehyung nodded, and sat down on the chair, chin on his palm as he watched you started preparing vegetables. You carefully slice the broccoli and the carrots. Careful that you might hurt Taehyung because he was looking close at what you are doing. After slicing the broccoli and carrots, you went back to the potatoes you steamed and started cutting it in half. You looked up at Taehyung who was busy looking at your hands. You tilted your head in confusion, when he held your fingers, and you finally noticed that you have little cuts on your hands.

“Careful, baby girl.” He said and you pulled your bottom lip between your teeth when he carefully examined your cuts. It wasn’t really that deep but you know Taehyung is such a worry wart, so you let him be. “I don’t want you to hurt yourself.” You nodded, and caressed Taehyung’s cheeks and kissed his forehead to ease his worries. Taehyung smiled at your action, he loves it when you’re being affectionate with him. When the three of you started this kind of relationship, you were always too shy to express your feelings when you’re not horny, so he cherished every little moment when you show a little bit of your affection to both of them.

“I’m sorry Sir. I’ll be careful.” You responded, and immediately went back in preparing the food. You heard the oven made a ding sound, you turned your heels and approached it, you gently took out the whole chicken and carefully put the chicken on the white porcelain plate you took out hours before. The potatoes you’ve cut were carefully placed with a tong around the chicken. You pushed back your hair, and pushed your sleeves to your elbows, as your body released more sweat due to the heat rushing around the kitchen. Taehyung was considerate to you as he carefully removed the cake from the box and placed it on a wide porcelain plate. He was also arranging the plates and utensils on the table. You smiled, you were about to call Taehyung when heavy steps caught your attention, as your eyes focused on the stairs.

Jungkook was busy rubbing his eyes simultaneously going down, he yawned and stretched his body. Jungkook’s eyes immediately looked for you, and smiled when he saw you looking at him. Right away, Jungkook approached you and hugged you tightly, he was giving soft kisses on your neck and you giggled at that action. Jungkook is usually affectionate when he just woke up, and gets shy when he finally wakes up. You heard the doorbell rang and patted Jungkook’s cheeks, “The pizza arrived. I’ll just go get it.”

He kissed your cheek, “I’ll get it sweetheart.” and immediately went walk away to get the pizza.

You finished pouring the gravy on the chicken, just in time when Jungkook went back to you and hugged you from behind. You chuckled. “You’re being so affectionate to me.”

“Is that wrong, sweetheart?”

You instantly shook your head. “No, sir. I like it.” You smiled when Jungkook continued kissing your neck. You were a bit surprised when Taehyung suddenly appeared in front of you, without saying anything, he immediately captured your lips. The thing that both Taehyung and Jungkook like is sandwiching you, they love it when you’re couldn’t catch up to the both of them, they love it when you writhe because of them.

This kind of relationship started when Taehyung and Jungkook decided that you were their third. Both of them were dominants, and it was funny to see the both of them trying to control the situation. Jungkook would usually lose since Taehyung was just too persistent but you, you were their ultimate submissive and you love that. You first didn’t like this idea, it was complete rubbish or immoral for you due to your upbringing but every time they would just be all too dominant on you, whisper dirty promises in your ear, you were a goner. You were a begging mess for them, and eventually, you accepted this kind of relationship, as you also fell in love with them.

Your family and colleagues disagree with this kind of relationship but it took everything for you to leave everything and live with them. You thought you would regret your decision, that you would come back home, crying and begging for forgiveness for your family but everyday, both of them would give you more reason to stay. They never lose a chance to shower you love, to remind you that you made the right decision in choosing them.

You were exchanging tongues with Taehyung as Jungkook’s hands explored your body, molded your waist and left wet trails on your neck to your nape. You gasped when Taehyung pulled out, immediately moaned when Jungkook squeezed the globes of your ass. You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth, you were ready to what was going to happen. You glance at the food and thought that it could wait since the heat at your center was immediately rushing to you, and your body was immediately becoming sensitive for them. Then, the three of you paused when you heard an alarm clock ring. You remembered that you set the alarm to remind you to wake up Jungkook and Taehyung. You checked your wristwatch and it was already 12 midnight. It was already Christmas. You looked both at Jungkook and Taehyung and they were smiling.

Each of them kissed your lips, “Merry Christmas sweetheart” “Merry Christmas baby girl”

You smiled, “Merry Christmas…sirs.” As you each gave them a kiss.

#taekook #taekook fic #taekook fluf #vkook #bts #bts fic #bts v #bts taehyung #bts tae #bts jungkook #bts jk #bts tae fluff #bts jungkook fluff #bts tae scenarios #bts taehyung scenarios #bts jungkook scenarios

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promisedangel · 6 years

Text

Dollywood Review

Welp, now I know one of my friends knows of my Tumblr, so I kinda have to put this up.

Tuesday: -Travel day. Drove from home to Tennesse in about ten hours with the stops. Made more than we should have, but that’s mostly because one gas station was being a pain with my card, so I cash prepaid a bit and then got out of there cuz I was pissed at the damn machine. -Was snowing when we left our home in Ohio. Once we got near Cincinnati, no more snow! NO MORE SNOW! -Lovely scenery on the way to Pigeon Forge. -Once again, my mind saves me from boredom. I wanted to put Critical Role on in the car, but with three other people, it would be a captive audience. y mind instead went to dumb and fantasy scenarios to pass the time as I shuffled the music on my phone. -HOLY SHIT Pigeon Forge is such a tourist trap! There’s so much stuff to do there! We only went for Dollywood, but we are considering going back to do more touristy things. -The hotel we stayed at, the Music Road Hotel, was GORGEOUS! We loved it. Beds were a bit weird for me; I kept tossing and turning one night, and I think it was the firmness of the bed. Dunno. -After we got settled, we heard about this alpine coaster, which is a track that uses the mountainside to have a coaster-like experience. The one we heard of first, Pigeon Forge Alpine Coaster, was unfortunately closed for seasonal repairs. BUT, it was set to reopen Friday, the day we leave. We decided to do it then. -Went down the road some more and found ANOTHER alpine coaster not too far from the first one. It was called the “Goat Coaster” at Goats on the Roof of the Smokey Mountains. Loved it, great start. -Went to a place called Calhoun’s for dinner. Pretty good place. Had my only glass of booze for the whole trip there. I liked my chicken sandwich, but I wish they put honey mustard on it. -Went back to the hotel and found out one of my friends brought his Nintendo Switch! We played Mario Kart until it was time for bed. We had Dollywood in the morning!~

Wednesday: -The first day of Dollywood! -Decent breakfast at the hotel. Too used to bacon, cuz they had none and I was sad. They had some good tea, though! -Got to everything we wanted to, so this’ll be the long one. -CUBBIES! Oh my gods. Every single ride had cubbies for stuff! Love it! -Played Pokemon Go a lot of the time at Dollywood in between rides. Got a lot of pokemon and powered up a couple I already had. Got my first Moltres there <3 -First up was Lightning Rod. Pretty fun ride. Has a lot of airtime that kinda jerks you a bit. Could do with a little more padding but it doesn’t really hurt ya. -Had some fun doing some flat rides. The Carousel, bumper cars, swings, sky rider, Dizzy Disk. Pretty fun. -Went and got some of the supposedly famous cinnamon bread. It was good, but not overly so. But that’s also not the thing I’m overly into. -Brainstormer was fun, always good to have a giant swing ride. -Saw the park had its own Bald Eagle preserve and displayed some other birds like owls, hawks, and a raven! You never know how big ravens actually are until you see one! They’re twice as big as you think they are. Beautiful birds. -Blazing Fury was kinda boring dark ride. It was interesting to have a fire figther theme, but they didn’t really do much with it. -The Tenesse Tornado was really fun! Even though it was mostly just a few loops. Short, but sweet. But the walk to the loading station was so darn long! Kinda common for these rides. -Wild Eagle! Probably one of my favorite rides in the park! Nice wing coaster with awesome airtime and the turns take you by surprise in the back! -Firechaser Express was a fun little family ride. The surprise backward part was fun! -Drop Line was a fun little drop tower that spun you on the way up! Still think the one in King’s Island was better. -Had some trouble with Thunderhead at first. It’s an older wooden coaster so younger coaster enthusiasts will think it’s bumpy. Take my advice that I learned on the second day; sit in the back, it’s tamer back there and you get sweet airtime on the turns. -We hit the water rides next cuz it was in the seventies and we didn’t want to do them the second day cuz it dropped to the fifties. We hit River Rampage first. We didn’t get as soaked as we were expecting, but most of our pants were soaked while our tops were mildly so. The ride also teased times we could have gotten soaked. -Daredevil Falls also didn’t get us too soaked. Two of us stood on the bridge to purposefully get soaked. Also, one of the operators noticed two of us wearing brony t-shirts and commented positively in a way we didn’t get at first but we laughed at regardless. -Rockin’ Roadway was one of those nice little automated car rides. Just nice. -Relaxed on the Dollywood Express. Got a little history of the area and park with a couple laughs. It was a real steam engine, too, so there was a bit of soot and some of us had to cover their mouths. Still found some soot on our clothes after we returned to the hotel. -The Mystery Mine was closed until near the end of the day cuz of mechanical issues. So we hit it last. This ride had the best theming in the park and was fun overall. Pretty lite in intensity until the end, but it can bump your head around a bit if you’re not careful. -After the park closed, we changed out of any wet clothes at the hotel and went out to dinner. The same guy who brought the Switch found this restaurant called the Old Mill and it was AWESOME. Good southern three-course meal for about $20 per person. Had some authentic southern sweet tea with it. Started with corn fritters, salad, and corn chowder. Didn’t care for the chowder but the fritters were so good! Next was our main dishes. I got the country fried ham and OH MY GODS IT WAS LIKE I WAS EATING A GIANT PIECE OF BACON IT WAS SO GOOD! We also got dessert. I got a good chocolate cake while two of our group had a blackberry cobbler that they said they would sell someone’s soul for. Seriously. If you ever go to Pidgeon Forge for any reason, eat here! -Relaxed in the room with more Switch before bed.

Thursday: -This was our relax day. We took things slower and rerode anything we wanted to and ignored what we didn’t. Wild Eagle eventually got closed for the day, but not before we rode it a couple times. -We took our time and did some shopping. Bought a necklace for my moirail and two plushies, a sheep and a fox. THE SHEEP IS SO ADORABLE and the fox is prety cute too. -Since we did Pokemon Go things, three of us did a raid which we won! But I was the only one who didn’t get the pokemon from it! I was so pissed. -We ate at the buffet in the park for an early dinner. Funny story about it. The guys wanted to reride the flat rides, but the girls of the group didn’t. We decided to split off and do our own thing and meet at the buffet. So, the guys went on the teacups and one of them spun the cup as fast as he could. We found that he got the other one kinda sick cuz of it. Our waitress at the buffet, Charla, was so concerned about him, asking if there was something she could do to help. He just walked outside the buffet a couple of times and got better. We eventually chatted with her throughout the meal. Lovely woman. -On the note of customer service, we loved the rumored ‘southern hospitality’! Everyone was so nice and things were served quickly! I swear, if someone was rude to the Dollywood staff, ESPECIALLY CHARLA, I swear I will physically manifest into the park and punch them in the face! They were nothing but nice, giving us directions when we mildly expressed some confusion among other things. -The buffet was good. Mac and cheese was a bit bland, but the mashed potatoes and the turkey were so good!! I regret not eating half of my second slice of turkey, but I wanted to save room for dessert. Then after I ate dessert, I had room, and I know I could have finished off the turkey T.T -Finished off with more rides on Lightning Rod before running to the bakery and sweet shops at the front of the park for some chocolate truffles, cookies, and cupcakes at the hotel. We were gonna get some monkey bread, but they were out of over an hour before we got to the shop. I got some truffles and a giant cookie. They were good. -We relaxed back at the hotel and began to pack up a bit to help ourselves in the morning.

Friday: -We had a nice surprise when we went down for breakfast at the hotel. This guy was down there with a cockatoo and another small bird i forget the name of! We was advertising this interactive bird zoo thing and we got to play with the birds! This guy next to us was playing with one of the birds when we had the other one. It was clear he was a bird guy. He flipped the small one onto his back and gave him belly scratches. He snuggled the cockatoo and gave her neck scratches. They were in heaven. The cockatoo liked to nibble lightly at our sweatshirts and was pretty chill. The other guy liked to explore and zip to our shoulders. He even gave one of us kisses! I was so jealous. -We went to the alpine coaster that was closed. It was a lot of fun. Better than the one at Goats on the Roof, but both of them were still fun. -We said our goodbyes to Pidgeon Forge and headed home. Got stuck in some Cinncinatti traffic, but we were fine other than that. Arrived later than I would have liked, but we also kinda stopped a lot so that’s on us.

Overall, good trip!

#dollywoood #promised reacts #rambles #long post

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itsnotdavid-blog · 7 years

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MY VILLAINOUS LAIR

TL;DR - I’m indecisive and I don’t know if I want to live in a large house surrounded by friends and family, or if I’d be better off hiding away in isolation inside some tiny, walled off excuse of a home. No to cars, yes to gardens. Fuck yeah, nature!

Nothing’s more fun than being tasked with writing a blog post for a class activity. To start things off, I’d like to apologize beforehand for this needlessly long wall of text. I don’t expect you to read along, and I certainly don’t expect you to remember all the itty bitty details, but I do want you to know is that I’m what the cool kids call extra. We were expected to draw one house and my stupid self ended up coming up with three. If that doesn’t give you an idea of what kind of person I am, then I don’t know what will.

The question still lingers: what exactly do these houses represent? If there’s one thing I’ve learned today, it’s that all these seemingly insignificant little doodles form a bigger picture. Isn’t it exciting - a big picture made of little pictures? Like one big mosaic where each tile delves deeper into the myriad insecurities that stir within me. My inner optimist says it’ll paint something pretty, like a field of vibrant sunflowers, or a horde of zombies getting ravaged by a pack of fire-breathing velociraptors. Then again, there’s also the possibility of this picture taking the semblance of a donkey’s sphincter, or possibly even Mama June after a hot, sweaty yoga session.

Either way, the picture isn’t what’s important.

What’s important is that I’ve got three houses, each more pointless than the last, and it’s my job to figure out what these doodles mean. Even as the professor spoke and told us to put our pencils aside, I simply couldn’t keep mine off the paper. It was like there was this odd, supernatural force compelling me to finish what I started. But why? I don’t even put this much effort into waking up in the morning, so what’s gotten me to go full-ham on something entirely fictional and meaningless? The more time I spent on the drawing, the more I began to realize it was wholly unrealistic.

So I started again.

Scratched that one after five minutes. Too small, too unambitious. This one didn’t seem right to me at all.

So I started again.

Eventually I ran out of time, and was ultimately left with three unfinished houses; all distinct with little-to-no similarities save for the essentials. Needless to say, I was devastated. How could I fail something as simple as drawing a house? This was the unassuming sort of task you’d give to a five year old and I’m sure they’d manage to get it finished one way or another. I’ll bet their houses even have dinosaurs. Life isn’t fair.

The first house I drew was far larger than the other two - the perfect home for a less-than perfect family. There’s even a small patch of land in the back that’s dedicated to growing fruit and vegetables, it is fucking awesome. Despite the sheer size of the building, the rooms totaled to four, and that’s only if you don’t count the garden and the backyard. Think of it this way: if a house is big, you can assume it’s got a lot of rooms, and if it’s got a lot of rooms, it’s got a lot of space for inhabitants and/or guests. Generally, some of the more introverted people prefer returning to a lonelier home after a long day of work, faking smiles and chatting up people they’d never interact with outside the office. The last thing they’d want to deal with at home is even more needless social interaction.

With that in mind, it wouldn’t be too much of a stretch to conclude that an introvert wouldn’t want to live with other people unless they absolutely had to. The second house drawn seems to represent this on a deeper level. Let’s pretend for one minute that there’s more to me than meets the eye. It’s not totally unreasonable to assume that a self-proclaimed introvert would want some company every now and then - there’s no shame in wanting to be alone, but that doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to enjoy spending time with friends and family. The two aren’t mutually exclusive.

Though it might not be clear, given my abysmal skill with architecture, house planning and all things creative, I poured a lot more passion into this house in comparison to the others. Even if I firmly believe that what other people think of me is none of my business, I still feel as if my appearance matters in some way. I’m all for sticking to the status quo but there’s no denying that I’m, as I said before, what the cool kids call extra. For better or for worse.

It’s strange. I’d never admit it in person, I do actively try to distinguish myself from the crowd for whatever reason… but at the same time, I resent the attention that comes with it. It’s a hard duality to put into words, so you’ll have to pardon my inability to explain it. I don’t quite get it myself, you see. Even if everyone in the world’s special and unique in their own whimsical little ways, people are too busy concerned with themselves to notice this about others. It’s an easy to trap to fall into, perceiving someone as dull simply because they’re not good conversationalists; because their quirks are of the subtler sort and only tend to shine once you truly get to know the person.

The tragedy is, people won’t ever invest enough time to see that side of them.

This is only highlighted by the sheer difference between this house and the two drawn after it. It could be argued that the first home - the larger home - represents the side of me that wants to be surrounded people, and stand out by towering over all the others. This is in stark contrast to the other two, which arguably fits the size of an apartment room than an actual house given its scale and lack of a second floor - a claustrophobic little hovel that’s more fit for a gremlin than a man. I’d imagine it’d be like living in a trash compactor. Don’t get me wrong, it’s good living. Doesn’t change the fact that you’re living in a trash compactor.

Still, I get the feeling I’m only scratching the surface and that there’s so much you can take from the size of the two houses alone. Maybe it represents my desire to live in isolation in my villainous lair, walled off from the rest of the world. Looking back on it now, there’s no way I’d survive in a house like that. I’d go insane, mainly because there’s nothing to do but also because I’m a bit of a claustrophobe. What was I thinking?

Just by looking at this house alone, you can already tell I’ve started to lose a bit of steam. There’s a reason why I don’t do interior decorating - it’s because I’m absolutely dreadful at it. Look at this. What kind of madman puts the bathroom next to the kitchen and not the bedroom? It’s hilariously inefficient, if you ask me. Takes a certain kind of idiot to come up with a house like this and even bigger one to want to live in it.

Bah! It just gets worse and worse!

If there’s something all three of these houses have in common, it’s a kitchen. Funny. You’d think the bedroom would be something I’d prioritize, but apparently food comes first. In all fairness, the only reason I didn’t include a bedroom in the first doodle was because I lacked the time. It’s strange though. I haven’t exactly cooked a proper meal since I moved here just a little over a year ago. Perhaps this the brain’s strange and subtle way of telling you to start cooking once again, though it’s also possible that my brain’s simply calling me fat. Either way, it capitalizes on my love of food.

On the other hand there is something that all my houses lack and the only person I can blame for that is myself. There’s no fucking garage. Whether it was a simple overlook or a subconscious desire, it’s given me a lot to think about. I’ve never been fond of cars, and I’ve never exactly wanted to drive either so it’s only natural that there’ll be nothing in my house related to such things. Still, every family ought to have a vehicle. They’ve got to get around town somehow. Walking simply isn’t an option in this day and age, as fun as it sounds. Speaking of oversights, I’ve also failed to make any note of what house would look from the outside. All I’ve got is a top-down view: a simple outline that maps out where the furniture’s supposed to go.

Not that I’d end up following it anyway.

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podmusical · 7 years

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Lovers and Sinners who Eat Their Dumpling Dinners

Credits and Lyrics for Episode 10 of The Fall of the House of Sunshine

starring:

Ethereal Band Being - Rachel Flynn Berdie - Hanna Cheek Dankent - Nathaniel Kent

additional vocal arrangements by Rachel Flynn and Nicholas DiMichele

written by Jonathan A. Goldberg music by Matt roi Berger

PART ONE

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Some awful scene splits it’s seams. He remembers. Like out from an ocean, he stirs. He’s in bed asleep, breathing hard. Is he dreaming?

Muttering wordlessly, eyes stutter open. Still swimming in some far’way sea. The ceiling stares back, and it says not a word to him… Then-

BERDIE

Awake, you’re finally awake. I worried you would sleep the day away.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

He sits up. At the table nearby, At the little wooden table sits Berdie. Berdie reads the paper, then she sets it to the side With a smile and her head cocked so slight.

Berdie sees his face and she frowns - does she see? The ocean from his dream sweeping up, in, over him…

BERDIE

Did you have a nightmare again? Dr. Heller warned us that the new medicine might Make you foggy, give you strange, queer dreams. That you may become disoriented, fitful in your sleep.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

He says he’s fine, he is fine, just a dream that - He tries to tell her but there’s no remembering. It was so clear, he was sure, he was in another place, So that now, being here - something’s wrong, so strange…

BERDIE

Only thing wrong is that you’re still in bed

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

She pulls him to stand by her side. Their hands holding tight, he feels their rings touching

“Our rings…” he thinks.

BERDIE

Keep up, Butch. Keep up.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Butch, he is Butch! And he laughs, Of course, now he remembers.

BERDIE

My love - what’s so funny?

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

She smiles and he pulls on his clothes.

She opens the door and they’re crossing the lot, Her hand in his hand and the sun high and hot He’s happy at last, dreams forgot And she’s leading him on…

But where? What is this place?

PUMP N DUMP

BERDIE

Does your tummy want a stuffing? The car need fill-r-upping? Look no farther, partner, hurry on down! Set your destination On the only combination Fueling station / dumpling parlor in town!

Gas, diesel and taste delights! Grab your keys, Grab a seat, Grab a bite!

We got samosas and pierogis, Shue mai and raviolis, Empanadas and momo from Nepal. Kibbeh and boraki, Some greek Koulakli Manti - Try them all - we’ll take your pic for our wall!

Pump-N-Dump! Step inside. Heaven in a bite, steamed or fried. Pump-N-Dump! Paradise! Full service with a smile, stay a while!

Now the business was a dream Made up of oil, dough and steam. I was so pleased but knew something was amiss. Then one night you wandered in And our eyes met and that was it! Someone to share this paradise with!

And the dumpling angels sang:

DUMPLING ANGELS + BERDIE

Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!

BERDIE

Pump-N-Dump, By your side - 10 long years, feeling so satisfied. Pump-N-Dump. How it flies. Filling tanks and tummies, husband and wife! Two dumplings in the sauce of our lives!

So breakfast dinner lunch - Come on in and take the plunge. No finer of a diner exists! Come do yourself a favor And try all of our flavors. We’ll stuff like our titular dish!

Gas, diesel and taste delights! Grab your keys, Grab a seat, Grab a bite!

Pump-N-Dump! Step inside - Heaven in a bite, steamed or fried! Pump-N-Dump! Paradise!

DUMPLING ANGELS + BERDIE

Full service with a smile, stay a while! Full service with a smile, stay a while! Full service with a smile, stay a while!

PART 2

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Butch looks around and he walks and he thinks. He touches the counter and something seems wrong…

But he knows that Berdie’s watching so he smiles and he whistles And he gets behind the register.

He eats a couple dumplings and he listens to the customers, It all seems so familiar, but wrong…

BERDIE

You used to sit here a drink. Here, sit. Have a drink. This is the spot where we met, It’s perfect, don’t you think? Eat some more dumplings, my dumpling, my dear. Your blood sugar’s just a bit off

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Butch eats lunch then returns to his register And now he’s feeling better. Berdie was right. The day moves on with a simple pull: The cars get gas. The people get full. Berdie’s in the kitchen but she always sees him looking. When she does, she shines a smile and he lights inside.

BERDIE

Look at you, look at you, Doing what you always do, Making everything right.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And Butch feels so heavenly, Opens his mouth to agree, But then just as he does…

CREATURES

Lies. Lies. Lies.

BERDIE

Butch! Pack up, we must be going. Lock the drawer and come, my heart. Why are you looking so distressed, dear? No one comes here after dark. No one goes out when the sun sets, Just as it has always been. Hurry, hurry, let’s get home. I’ll hold you tight and lock us in.

CREATURES

Lies. Lies. Lies.

BERDIE

Hurry Butch, It’s time to go.

CREATURES

Lies. Lies. Lies.

BERDIE

Hurry Butch, I love you so.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Berdie’s waiting by the door - her Heart is jumping in her breast. Darkness looms outside the windows. All the customers have left. When oh when did all this happen? Butch’s head begins to spin. Berdie runs and grabs his hands And smiles forceful, kisses him-

CREATURES

Lies. Lies. Lies.

BERDIE

Hurry Butch, I love you so.

CREATURES

Lies. Lies. Lies.

BERDIE

Dammit Butch, It’s time to go.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Outside they’re outside, cracked asphalt and sky. A weight leaves his chest and he breathes for the first time. Back, he was back, eaten up by the ocean.

She walks far ahead, he runs fast to collect her. They scurry inside and she locks up the door. The windows are caged in, she shivers, avoids him.

Is this how she always seems?

BERDIE

Nothing’s wrong. Nothing’s wrong. It’s only- I forgot to eat. I’m such a silly thing. Why do you love me?

Come sit down, have a drink, Have your medicine, dear. Dr. Heller said to take them Til the migraines disappear.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And oh, Butch sits and wonders at things That flirt at the edge of his mind. And oh, Berdie, she’s holding his hand And suddenly everything’s fine. This is His life. His quiet life. His easy life. His simple life.

And Berdie looks at him and sings.

SIMPLE LIFE

BERDIE

“Such potential…” Dream sings all the time. Seems essential, tells us what we like. Begs us from the ordinary, Swears we need to leave our Simple Life

Low and sweetly, Life sings “take your time.” Slow and easy, boring, lovely, mild. Measured out in moments holding You, I’m hoping for a Simple Life.

And oh! it would be such a Simple Life. And oh! it could be such a Simple Life. And oh! it should be such a Simple Life. And oh! it would be such a Simple Life.

PART 3

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And Butch takes Berdie’s hand. They go to bed.

…But…

LET US IN

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Cold sweat, the world is black, And throttling his heart. Eyes deaf, he hears his nightmare, Something calling in the dark. Awake awake he stands, Remembers where he is. At the door there’s something calling, Something saying “let us in.”

VOICES

Let us in, let us in. Let us in, let us in. Let us in, let us in. Let us in, let us in.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

The world blurs at the edges, And this is the only thing. Butch floats forward, at the door His hand, it reaches, trembling…

BERDIE

Stop!

Oh. My love. We don’t go out at night, We don’t go out at night. Comeback to bed and look into my eyes.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And he looks into her eyes, And his head begins to hurt. But suddenly, it’s alright - The sun in up! It’s time for work!

Butch is smiling at his station, Trying to catch Berdie’s eye. Is she crying? No, she’s smiling Back at him. There’s nothing’s on his mind.

Days go by. Life is only dumplings And his simple, lovely life. And late at night, After Berdie falls asleep, That’s when can Butch can stop pretending, Out of bed and quiet on his feet.

And he waits. And he waits. And he waits. And he waits.

And he waits. And he waits. And he waits. And he-

And there it is again, That something at the door. It’s calling out to him. Several voices, something more.

His eyes begin to throb, Something trying to come clear. Up he reaches to his head - There’s something, something in his hair…

VOICES

Let us in, let us in.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And he turns the locks.

VOICES

Let us in, let us in.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And he slides the bar.

VOICES

Let us in, let us in.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And he holds the knob.

VOICES

Let us in, let us in.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And he starts to turn.

VOICES

Let us in, let us in.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And he holds his head.

VOICES

Let us in, let us in.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

There it is again…

VOICES

Let us in, let us in.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Something in his hair.

VOICES

Let us in, let us in.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Something in his…

BERDIE

Stop!

PART 4

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And it all goes still And she says it again:

BERDIE

Stop.

Come back to bed. But oh, but oh, but oh. Do you have something in your hair?

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And she goes to pluck it out, But she stops -

BERDIE

Oh. No. There’s nothing there.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Nothing there.

BERDIE

No, don’t. Don’t - Leave it alone. It’s just a bit of - oh… It’s just a bit of… Just a bit of…

PART 5

DANKENT

Fuzz. It’s fuzz. Oh. Panglo. It’s. It’s all coming back. Like a. Like a dam. Brushee. Flosso. Damn it. Where am I! What is this? Who are you!

BERDIE

I’m sorry.

DANKENT

It’s all changed. The house is run down. Paint peeling Its. What the Hell is going on?

BERDIE

I’m sorry. I’ve tricked you with a glamor. The truth is I’m a ham-pire. And I’m surrounded at night by vicious were-hams that mean to do me in. For centuries since Ben Franklin brought the cursed pork loins of Ab-En-Nur back from the Nubian basement of Versailles to the US there have been two supernatural creatures at war. I – the ham-pire and they the were-hams. And they have killed all ham-pires but me. The only thing that keeps me safe is this gas station. The smell of gas keeps them at bay, but my supply has been running out.

DANKENT

The Pump N Dump.

BERDIE

Sadly it’s only an abandoned Sinclair Station long since closed. It’s gas slowly evaporating away. And those dumplings you ate were just rocks I found.

DANKENT

And not going out at night? Wait – I ate rocks?

BERDIE

Ham-pires can only go out during the day, if we go out at night we’d turn into moonlight. Were-hams are the opposite if they go out during the day they’ll turn to sunscreen.

DANKENT

Sunscreen?

BERDIE

SPF 35. But it’s not water resistant.

DANKENT

Oh. But how?

BERDIE

The chemicals make it – oh you mean about you. I found you, in a ditch, unconscious. Hurt. I healed you. I saw you and I thought… I’d been alone for so long. So I created a fantasy.

DANKENT

So all those … things I felt.

BERDIE

I can’t change feelings. What you felt. You felt. But. I can recreate the Pump N’ Dump. I can rebuild the world and we can stay in it.

DANKENT

I um…

HE WISHED HE COULD

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

He wished he could. Na Na-na Na na na. He wished he could. Na Na-na Na na na.

He wished he could stay in her arms. He wished he could say that he never understood How people burst into song, But something about her Made him want to sing.

He wished he could let her know That she was like music. That never liked music But suddenly, with her, he liked music.

And he wanted to grab her And hold her lil the world falls down And give her all the things That people give each other Like candy and cigarettes and hearts and small dogs.

But in the end all he managed was:

DANKENT

I kinda got this whole evil puppet thing.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

He wished he could. Na Na-na Na na na. He wished he could. Na Na-na Na na na.

PART SIX

BERDIE

I understand. Here.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Berdie goes to a drawer and she gets out a small ham hock made of pure cobalt.

BERDIE

Here it’s a small ham hock made of pure cobalt. It was forged by my grand-pire.

DANKENT

I’ll wear it. Proudly.

BERDIE

Good.

DANKENT

Now I just have to figure out how to get to New Molar.

BERDIE

New Molar? That’s easy. The express bus to Beloit stops across the way. Take that then transfer to the 165T direct to New Molar.

DANKENT

Oh. Great.

BERDIE

In the morning I’ll walk you to the stop.

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And after a small breakfast of sunny-side up rocks they walked to the stop.

DANKENT

Listen if I survive this whole thing I’ll come back and I’ll. I’ll find a way to get you free of the were-hams and we’ll. Listen I … you’re OK kid.

BERDIE

Kid? I’m 235 years old.

DANKENT

You don’t look a day over 138.

BERDIE

Your bus is here.

DANKENT

Thanks for patching me up.

BERDIE

Safe travels, Butch.

DANKENT

My name’s ... thanks. See you soon.

HE WISHED HE COULD REPRISE

ETHEREAL BAND BEING

And he. And he. And he boards the bus. And he. And he. And he pays the fare. And he. And he. And he sits in the back. And he sits. And he hurts. And he watches her wishing he could stop everything and go back there.

He wished he could. Na Na-na Na na na. He wished he could. Na Na-na Na na na.

He watches her. Getting smaller. As the bus pulls away. As the gas station retreats into a point, A point on a map. A dot on the map. It gets smaller. It gets smaller. And he watches. And he watches. And it all gets small. But when he thinks about her,

Berdie looms large.

BUS DRIVER

Next stop: Beloit.

ANNOUNCER

Dankent’s detour is over! As the world of ham-pires and were-hams fade in the rearview we find him heading head first toward New Molar. But is it too late to stop Fuzzo and the fuzzitronic bomb? Find out next time on The Fall of the House of Sunshine Episode Eleven – Faster Dankent, Kill! Kill!

#lyrics #detour #musical #podcast #murder #mystery #adventure #dumplings #The Fall of the House of Sunshine #fall of the house of sunshine

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williamsjoan · 5 years

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Double Cross Review — An Inter-Dimensional Extravaganza Made Boring

I’ll be blunt from the start and say that Double Cross is a disappointing game. The game is not poorly designed or broken, it even has some good ideas, it’s just painfully unoriginal and ultimately boring. This becomes an even bigger disappointment when you consider how developer 13AM Games really put themselves on the map with Runbow for Wii U. It was unlike most other platformers that came before it, taking advantage of color in unique ways to create a fast-paced game that was super fun in multiplayer.

Unfortunately, Double Cross is the opposite in many ways. Its visuals look flat despite cool designs and animation, the focus on story proves to be frivolous because of lackluster writing, and its gameplay mechanics, while solid, feel wholly uninspired. When combined with the game’s incredibly short length and occasional technical problems on Switch, the game’s milquetoast nature ultimately means I can’t recommend this game over tons of other great platformers that are available on the Nintendo Switch and PC.

youtube

“The game is not poorly designed or broken, it even has some good ideas, it’s just painfully unoriginal and ultimately boring.”

As I mentioned in my preview, Zahra works for an inter-dimensional policing agency called R.I.F.T.. At the start of the game, a traitor masquerading as Suspect X allows their cohorts to break into R.I.F.T.’s headquarters in the Extraverse, kicking off a large scale investigation by Zahra into who or what is behind this major attack.

The game tries to keep to keep this mystery as the focal point throughout the whole game, though the culprit does become fairly obvious part-way through. A minor last-minute twist did pique my curiosity, but the game ended before the concept presented could be fully explored. Conversations are displayed in what the developers describe as visual-novel inspired scenes, though there aren’t actually any dialogue choices.

The artwork and character design is actually quite good, which helped me get through the mostly generic and clunky dialogue. With how much emphasis Double Cross does occasionally try to put on the narrative, I was never consistently drawn to writing, only a couple funny jokes and characters like Agent Pineapple who is a master of disguise and in love with a woman named Ms. Ham.

During her adventure, Zahra has to find evidence around three worlds, Gootopia, Reptarria, and The Funderdome, in order to arrest the main culprit of that area and build her case to take down Suspect X. While the investigative portion of the game seems like it would feed into a hidden collectibles system that has players scouring the environment of each level in order to track down the clue needed, that is not the case. Instead, levels are fairly linear for the most part, usually handing the needed evidence or requiring players talk to the right person once they get back to R.I.F.T. to turn it into evidence.

Upgradium is the main collectible within each level. This is added to an experience bar at the end of a level, with each level up granting Zahra new passive abilities, permanent upgrades, or special attacks. This progression system is actually structured well, rewarding those who really try to sink their teeth into the game. While I still think Double Cross would’ve benefited by making the evidence more hidden or stages more quest-like, upgradium does still work well as a fine collectible. If only the base gameplay loop was more interesting.

Zahra has standard platforming abilities like punching, jumping, and kicking, as well as some other special attacks and the ability to dodge roll through lasers. That being said, Double Cross’ main hook when it comes to platforming is the proton sling, a grappling hook of sorts that lets Zahra swing through levels or pull down doors in certain situations. Sadly, that feels like the only real twist among the standard platforming gameplay, and it’s something titles like Flinthook have done before in a better designed and original way.

“Still, none of these [mechanics] feel wholly original or even superior to what’s present in Double Cross’ contemporaries in any way, which makes Double Cross feel derivative to a fault.”

The proton sling’s implementation feels a bit unnatural in some of the levels, which do try to make the most out of the mechanics present with things like goo that impact movement, a timer whittling down until a train explodes, or a series of arcade-like challenges tailored around Zahra’s abilities. Still, none of these feel wholly original or even superior to what’s present in Double Cross’ contemporaries in any way, which makes Double Cross feel derivative to a fault.

Part of Runbow’s beauty was how simple the game was, but in a slower paced single-player game with a strong gimmick like this, that simplicity ends up hurting the game without any real hook. Yes, you can choose the main fifteen levels in any order, but when none of them stand out that kind of mechanic doesn’t make me want to return to them and play in a different order next time, despite the game’s short length.

Unfortunately, that short length is another huge blow for Double Cross. As I’ve stated, not much from a gameplay standpoint is abhorrent, there’s just not enough room within the game and its 18 levels (including the tutorial room) to really let unique ideas get fleshed out or to make the game feel like anything more than painfully derivative. Even the levels themselves suffer from padding at some point with entire sections focused on killing enemies with the overtly simple and uninteresting combat.

The one saving grace of those combat sections is the highlight it puts on the game’s animation and character models which are surprisingly creative and fluid. Even if characters aren’t memorable due to bad dialogue, their designs do still stick out in my mind. While that segment of Double Cross’ visual design is good, even it can’t escape being a mixed bag. Environments all feel surprisingly flat and simple with barely enough interesting things going on to keep me invested in the game’s longer levels.

People voiced issue with this back when the game was first revealed, and it unfortunately still hasn’t been completely fixed despite the fact that 13AM took the criticism to heart. Something like Runbow could get away with simpler environments because of its focus on strong and striking color. In a game where Zahra is supposed to be visiting living and breathing worlds, that plainness doesn’t work as well.

Like with many other parts of Double Cross, the environmental art isn’t poorly drawn or designed, it just ends up portraying dimensions that feel more flat and lifeless than the developers were probably intended. The game also suffers from a few technical problems at launch on Nintendo Switch. The framerate would occasionally stutter in intense moments and there were even a few points where the sidescrolling got a bit jittery.

These minute, but sometimes noticeable, technical problems, as well as the length, were truly what pushed me over the edge into not recommending Double Cross. While the game can be harmless enough, its short length and few technical problems really ensure that it’s not worth the price or effort to play when there are other similar platformers on the Nintendo eShop and Steam right now.

I really hate to have compared Double Cross to so many other games during this review, but it just goes to show how trite and unnecessary the game ultimately feels. It isn’t a poorly designed game as its controls are fluid and responsive and most of the levels present are designed well with the gimmicks they play with. Double Cross’ story and its investigative backdrop even contain some neat ideas that would benefit from being fleshed out further. That being said, as they stand, most of those aforementioned things suffer from what seems to be a lack of ambition.

Double Cross ultimately plays things too safe to its own determent with mechanics that can be found, and are done better, elsewhere. Coupled with the title’s short length and a few technical problems on Nintendo Switch, the experience isn’t worth its cost. I see a great game here under the skin, one that incorporates the investigative elements into gameplay, features more polished writing, and has the vivid visuals of something like Runbow.

“Double Cross ultimately plays things too safe to its own determent with mechanics that can be found, and are done better, elsewhere.”

Sadly, this is not that game, despite having laid the groundwork for some elements that I would like to see fleshed out in other games. Double Cross is fairly superfluous, sci-fi platformer that’s just adequate enough to get by, and that’s exactly what makes it so frustrating when you know the talented and passionate team it comes from.

The post Double Cross Review — An Inter-Dimensional Extravaganza Made Boring by Tomas Franzese appeared first on DualShockers.

Double Cross Review — An Inter-Dimensional Extravaganza Made Boring published first on https://timloewe.tumblr.com/

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recentanimenews · 6 years

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Datteba-D'oh! - How WeebSimpsons Brought Anime to Springfield

The Simpsons has been a cultural phenomenon since its first episode in December of 1989. Days later, Akira premiered in the United States. Coincidence? Almost definitely. But what happens when you combine the irreverent characters of The Simpsons with the passionate fans and community of anime lovers?

Well, probably something like the @WeebSimpsons twitter account. With 35k+ followers, the account goes above and beyond to inject anime, Japanese culture, gaming and more into the town of Springfield. Learn what goes on behind the scenes in our interview with the person behind the account, Alex Kazanas.

pic.twitter.com/csg9Jafm3e

— WeebSimpsons (@WeebSimpsons) September 25, 2017

Which did you start watching first - anime or The Simpsons?

This one’s a bit tough! I started watching The Simpsons when I was a young’un, around season 1 or 2. I would’ve been 4 or 5 years old at the time. Although before then I had also been watching shows on Nick Jr. like Maya the Bee and Noozles – children’s cartoons that I had no idea were from Japan. The first time I watched anime and was cognizant of where it came from was in 1996, when Dragon Ball Z was airing on UPN at 6:00 a.m. Basically, if cultural awareness is a factor, The Simpsons. If not, anime.

Where did the initial concept for the account come from?

I can’t take complete credit - I have some friends who share the same love for both anime and The Simpsons that helped me conceive the premise. We quote The Simpsons ad nauseum so when we all get together it usually gets out of hand and goes to weird places. Last year during Otakon I was just getting over bronchitis, so my voice was ripe to do impressions of the Bouvier Sisters. And the theme of the weekend became “what if Patty and Selma only played Japanese video games.” It’s super funny to imagine Patty and Selma talk about Doki Doki Panic, so naturally our conversations about this heightened to the point where the rest of Springfield was equally obsessed with all things Japan. It was wildly stupid from the start and never let up. I didn’t put the twitter account into practice until a month or so later because I was trying to figure out whether to use image macros or do voice impressions. I obviously chose the easier, less time-consuming method.

Did you anticipate your account would grow so much?

Not really! I knew it was a good idea and kinda hoped it’d be regarded as well as accounts like @simpsons_vids or @simpsonsfilms, but didn’t have high expectations. After posting three entries on a September afternoon it took Anime Twitter by storm in a matter of hours. Later that night, I was having drinks with friends who had bets running to see at what time I would gain 5,000 followers. It was surreal.

You incorporate all sorts of media into your posts - anime, video games and fan culture included. Do you find that certain topics lend themselves better to Simpsons-style jokes?

Nah – I sometimes just go right for the deep weeb cut. It doesn’t matter what they’re talking about as long as it’s written in character. It’s gotten to the point where I reserve certain characters for certain topics. Patty and Selma love JRPGs. Lou is a big Gundam nut. Captain McCallister will only talk about One Piece. I’ve created my own little Weeb Springfield canon based on what I want to hear them talk about. And even if the cut is super deep, at least one person will fully appreciate it, and the rest will still dig it because they can actually hear the denizens of Springfield saying these things.

pic.twitter.com/NxojOCcCb2

— WeebSimpsons (@WeebSimpsons) October 2, 2017

What would you say is the hardest part about running a popular twitter account?

Having way more followers than my default account! I’d love to be able to spread that follower wealth and plug the other stuff I do in my spare time, but I’m pretty committed to keeping WeebSimpsons its own entity.

You’re combining two very passionate fandoms, have you noticed any characters or shows that fans react to the most?

My Hero Academia is the new hotness right now, so those entries are quite popular. Character-wise, any entry with Sideshow Bob. Everyone knows a vocal purist so he’s a pretty easy character to relate to. I’ve noticed my followers have coined a pretty clever nickname for him: “WeeaBob.” I love it.

Principal Skinner’s popularity due to the Steamed Hams scene from “22 Short Films About Springfield” becoming a meme in of itself have made Skinner quite popular. I did a 5-parter about Skinner, Edna Krabappel, and streaming services that was well-received. I call it “The Streamed Hams Arc” behind the scenes.

One of the interesting things about your account is how you poke fun at the industry - such as Crunchyroll - through the lens of the characters. Did you ever think you’d be getting interviewed by them?

Haha, nope! Never crossed my mind. I will say that any ribbing/dunking is meant as playful and comes from the character’s mouths, not mine. It’s pretty rare that I’ll insert my own opinions (but not completely out of the question).

pic.twitter.com/pIQH6MAkyP

— WeebSimpsons (@WeebSimpsons) January 18, 2018

Have you watched all of the shows and games that you reference? Or do you take fan suggestions?

Haha, no way! Imagine if I had all that time. I have a day job! I do know enough about what I reference to make any entry make sense, and I’ll do a bit of research on topics that I have no idea about. Though I do think that having this account has made me dive back into my weeb roots – I’m watching more anime now than I have in the past ten years!

As far as fan suggestions go, I don’t use a lot of the ones I get because most are an actual Simpsons quote with an anime or manga substituted for a word. I write these tweets as if they were a niche spec script. The funniest part about the account to me is hearing these characters talk about Yatterman, Tora-san, or pachinko on their own, as if it’s the norm in Springfield. That being said, there are three entries (as of this interview) that have been ghostwritten by friends of mine. See if you can spot them!

What would you say are your most unconventional anime and/or Simpsons opinions?

Haha, I hope I don’t lose followers for this. I’m not the biggest fan of Evangelion. I like it enough for what it is and what it’s done for its genre, but it’s not my favorite. As far as Simpsons opinions go, I don’t think “Last Exit to Springfield” is as great as everyone else does. It’s a good one, but wouldn’t crack my top 10.

pic.twitter.com/veBfZj0icf

— WeebSimpsons (@WeebSimpsons) October 25, 2017

The Simpsons has done several anime tributes and references in the past. Have you ever found yourself in the position of “The Simpsons did it” when creating content?

I think the closest example I can think of is the episode “Thirty Minutes Over Tokyo,” where the Simpson family visits Japan. It’s full of cultural references but there’s a line where Homer complains about his role in a kabuki play about the 47 Ronin (“I wanted to be Yoshi, but they made me Ori!”). That single line is more or less a WeebSimpsons entry. With the exception that I would do research to make sure those names are accurate.

pic.twitter.com/dbEG0Yf4F3

— WeebSimpsons (@WeebSimpsons) November 6, 2017

Do your friends or family know that you run @WeebSimpsons?

Yeah, a handful of my friends know about it. Co-workers too. My family has no idea and I doubt they would care that much, unless it paid the big bucks.

Who is best Simpsons girl?

I wanna say Selma because I love her a lot and she’s a blast to write entries for, but I’m gonna say Marge. A sweet, well-meaning, wet-blanket of a mom. Whenever she says something corny while trying her hardest to be a cool mom, I find it really endearing. It’s always nice when the rest of the family turns to her for support. Even Lisa, the voice of reason, needs a warm hug from mom and a pep talk every now and again.

Donuts with Homer or Ramen with Naruto?

Donuts with Homer. I’d throw in a little weeb action though – we’d go to Mister Donut! That’s not to say ramen with Naruto wouldn’t be completely out of the question- someone whose son is also named Bort can’t be all bad.

By: [email protected]

#Anime #News #Latest in Anime News by Crunchyroll!

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3one3 · 7 years

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The Sequel - 886

Parrot

André Schürrle, Juan Mata, other Chelsea/BVB players, and random awesome OC’s (okay they’re less random now but they’re still pretty awesome)

original epic tale

all chapters of The Sequel

“I hate Everton. They always fuck us. The least they could do is beat the team we would like to move ahead of. They find ways to fuck us even when they’re playing somebody else. And what the fuck is wrong with them anyway? Koeman is good. You love Koeman. You were literally the only person in all of Valencia who loved him, but still. England loved him last year. What is he even doing that they’re this bad?”

“If I open another bottle of Sant Jeroni will it make you calm, or more complaining?”

“I don’t know. Open it and let’s find out.”

Juan rolled his eyes when Christina clunked the side of her head into his and then gestured angrily at the iPad again about Ronald Koeman’s side and its ineptitude. They were installed in Rincón de Juan, at his dad’s restaurant, to eat Iberico and Manchego croquetas, and off-menu cheese fries. They were also testing new wines to see if they should go on the menu. The rider liked a white blend that included her favored Viognier grapes. They were merely sampling though, so she wasn’t yet drunk. Coca Cola with lemon was her prime beverage of choice. She did ask for more of that Sant Jeroni blend, however, and was disappointed to hear that the rest of the bottle was already gone. The restaurant manager poured samples for just about everybody in the place. Her personal host evidently thought he could temper her animated football commentary by opening up the second bottle sent from the distributor.

She was in London on Sunday afternoon, enjoying an Everton vs. Arsenal and Tottenham vs. Liverpool doubleheader, because an artist who painted a stunning picture of her sailing over a fence aboard Dirk at the Olympics invited her to the fundraiser auction at which he was selling it on Saturday evening. The proceeds were going to UNICEF, as part of a “Sports for the Greater Good” initiative. All the auction lots were sport-themed. Christina agreed to attend and sign the piece with a personalized message for the winning bidder. That really could have happened via mail, even though the painting was enormous, but it was a good excuse to go see Juan, so she went. He provided her with a ticket for Watford’s visit to Stamford Bridge at lunchtime, and accompanied her to the event. She was staying until Monday morning.

“Do you really want it, or no? It’s not cold. I have to put it in the freezer,” the Spaniard pointed out after Arsenal scored a fourth goal and his “secret girlfriend” closed the streaming app in disgust.

“No but can we take it home? For later? And can I go get my own soda or do I have to wait for whatshername?”

“I’ll get it.”

“You don’t trust me to walk around the bar and grab a soda?”

“No.”

“K. I need some more napkins too. Thanks.” Christina slid her empty soda bottle in front of him and helped herself to a French fry dripping in gooey white cheese sauce. Chef David greeted her when they got there and asked what she would eat if she could eat anything in the world, and she picked cheese fries, much to his amusement. He vowed to concoct the best cheese fries she’d ever had, and really delivered. She had no idea what sort of cheese was in the sauce, or what else was in it, but it sure was delicious, and the potatoes were crispy and perfectly salted. Visiting London was, for a while, like going on a mini holiday. Christina always ended up eating junk food, drinking, shopping, and having a lot of sex. Nothing at home in Dortmund was so stressful or monotonous that a vacation was necessary, but they were still nice little breaks, and they repaired the part of her heart that felt damaged and slightly painful whenever she was away from Juan for very long.

They were also a satisfying football fix. Dortmund was slowly killing her. Chelsea suffered a rough patch too. The Blues fought to rescue the three points at home on Saturday in a really exciting match that really fed her addiction in a way her husband’s side seemed incapable, and she was glad to be with her favorite Blue afterward because he made an individual error that led directly to a goal and she was afraid he’d be very down on himself about it. With a nice cocktail party and charity auction to go to, and a beautiful girl to go with, he couldn’t dwell on the mistake for long. His arm candy refused to let him beat himself up about it too. She blamed a blanket lack of organization and responsibility for both goals conceded.

“Do you want to stay here for the second game or nah?” she asked after he returned with a bottle of Coke and fresh glass of ice with two lemon wedges and a black straw. The black straw was important. Christina made him promise his restaurant would only use black straws.

“I don’t care. My dad is out of things to make me do while I’m here, so...” The Spaniard shrugged and sliced into a croqueta with the side of his fork. His interest in the fried food and cheese was necessarily less than hers. He picked while she stuffed her face. She also promised to cook for him later, so he was saving the space in his stomach.

“How is he always here? Does he just live here now?”

“Sometimes. I showed you the pictures of his place, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, but you said it was going to be like a crash pad when he’s in town. He’s always in town.”

“I’m not complaining,” Juan smiled.

“I miss Aidan,” Christina confessed. There was a reason why she was asking about the other Juan Mata always being around when she was in town. There was some kind of binding between her and friends who didn’t live near family. For example, Natasha’s parents hardly ever came to London. Eden’s were around all the time, and he took his family to his parents in Belgium often, but Natasha didn’t get to see her family much. Christina thought she related better to people without close family, despite Jill living at home permanently. Her parents weren’t actually in that home that often. Juan’s parents came to the UK for important matches, and he saw them at home in Spain when he could, so that distance was something she identified with. It was different, having one or both of his parents right there in town all the time.

Many times throughout the most difficult parts of the previous year- through her riding struggles, and her relationship nightmares- the equestrian star wished she had a mother read-in on all the drama to consult with, or just to vent to. There was no one. No one was in on her secrets. Sometimes she thought her desperation to talk to someone about that stuff was why she gave in and clued some people in, like Daniel and Marcus. It was really difficult to keep all of that stuff inside. The only people she could vent to were the people directly involved. It wasn’t that she missed her mom, per say, but any mom, or mom-like figure. A family member she did specifically miss was her brother. He hardly reached out to her since their father’s funeral. Christina missed that odd relationship. It wasn’t close or affectionate, but in some ways the Martin kids knew each other better than most. And she really wanted Lukas to benefit from knowing Aidan. Her brother was wonderful with kids. They all loved him, and he loved to hang out with them and show them things. He was a really great big brother when she was little and their age gap was more significant in terms of maturity, experience, and knowledge of the world.

“Have you spoken lately?”

“No. He doesn’t call me, and I feel like I need a reason to call him. I know we would end up on the phone for an hour, talking about ourselves and current events and movies and stuff, but usually I call him for a reason, like...his birthday, or an art question or something. The last few times we talked it was about the boat money.” I want him to come visit and demand that we go to the store to get a case of Coke right away, she thought, staring into her glass while pulling on the straw. He needs immediate soda and bread. I want to joke about the stuff only we find funny. Like Captain Ron.

“Why don’t you ask him to join you for the holidays? He has off from school?” Juan suggested. He leaned back on the banquette and put his arm up on it. He also picked up and then dropped her braided ponytail. The restaurant was a vigilance-free zone. He didn’t care who saw him do what there, which was kind of ironic given that diners often just sat there watching him. Playing with her hair wasn’t exactly a dead giveaway that they were sleeping together, but she thought the way he interacted with her was just really flirty at times, as in if she were watching then she would assume they were together. It didn’t worry her as much as it once did.

“I don’t even know where I’m going to be for the holidays. I’ll be here riding right before Christmas, Schü wants to have his family over and we’ve also talked about traveling since he has the long break, I know I’ll want to spend time with you...”

“You have a bad habit of focusing on obstacles instead of solutions, cariña.” The footballer gave in to desire and speared the other half of the breaded, fried log of ham and cheese béchamel with his fork, and popped it in his mouth before Christina could come back at him with some protest about how ignoring obstacles doesn’t solve anything and just gets one’s hopes up. But she didn’t say anything, or look up from her soda. If she wasn’t going to argue, he was going full steam ahead. “Your obstacles are mostly imaginary too. You don’t need a reason to call your own brother. No one does. Just call him and say “Hey, what’s new? How are you?” Or you could try something really crazy and tell him you rang because you miss him. And if you want to see him and he has the ability to come over, make the plan around that. André wants to be with family at Christmas, like most people, so he plans that. You can plan to be with family too. You could invite him to you in Germany, or ask him to join you here during the horse show, or have him meet you wherever André wants to “travel”. Why not have the whole family on the boat after New Year’s, something like this?”

“He’d be really bored. He doesn’t like sitting on a lounger all day.”

“That runs in the family, eh?” Juan smiled. He patted her thigh too. Her expression was quite patronized when she looked up to frown. “Stop making excuses,” he urged, clearly trying to be warmer about it and head off any impending angry, defensive backlash. He does that thing with his eyes so even when he’s being mean it seems like he’s not picking on you, the rider told herself. He’s so goddamn sincere. “If you want to talk to him, or see him, you can manage it. You’re a smart girl with means and flexibility!”

“Yeah but...what if he’s still mad at me about Dad?”

“That wasn’t your fault and he can’t seriously think it was.”

“But what if he does?”

“Then you should talk to him and find out why.”

“That sounds unbearable.”

“Give it a try, and if it’s unbearable then I’ll be there for you after. You can’t miss out on something good because you’re afraid it could be bad. This is why we have people close to us- why we let them in. We know they’re there to support us and comfort us when something doesn’t turn out the way we want. Having people makes you stronger. It-“

“Alright, alright, I don’t need a sappy speech,” Christina groaned. “I need cheese fries.” Deflecting and humor would always be her preferred tactics for avoiding emotional vulnerability on someone else’s terms. She wasn’t willing to admit to herself that the whole reason she brought up Aidan was that she wanted her sort-of-partner to talk her into it, tell her how, and then do something to make her feel better if it didn’t go well. She ate a couple of mildly cheese-blessed crispy fries and wiped her hands on a napkin from the pile he brought with her soda, and then put it in her lap to protect her sweatshirt. Ankle-length, super soft, light wash jeans, low leather sneakers, and casual-fit crewneck sweatshirts were the staples of her autumn look. She thought it wasn’t a “Mom Outfit” if the sweatshirts were by luxury brands and the butt in the jeans was world class. Her more practical sensibilities occasionally insisted that it was ridiculous to buy €300+ sweatshirts that were more or less the same as €30 ones without a brand or logo on the front, so she treated them like her nicest clothes. Fried food grease on a free adidas sweatshirt was unfortunate and disappointing but not tragic. Fried food grease on an Alexander McQueen swallow-motif sweatshirt was a nightmare of conscience.

“What are you making me for dinner later?”

“My mom’s beef stew, because it’s stew weather, it’s enough to last you several days, and it requires chopping a lot of veggies and stuff which is something fun we can do together.”

“You’re really missing the family, sí?” Juan knowingly inquired, voice low, grip on her leg tightening, eyes fixed on her profile.

“I always do this time of the year,” his visitor replied in a monotone but somehow still slightly begrudging way. Sometimes his ability to see the pattern in her behavior was annoying rather than comforting. “Thanksgiving, holiday decorating, Christmas shopping, really cold horse shows, making checklists for Florida...”

“You still do holiday decorating. You shop almost professionally. Your horse show in the arena is freezing. What’s missing,” the player mused, sitting forward to lean on his elbows on the table. He slid the platter of cheese fries over closer to Christina. “Thanksgiving, I understand, is just for eating. I generously volunteer to eat the Thanksgiving,” he offered as if to make some great sacrifice. “And for the list-making...how about you make a checklist of things to put in your bag when you come to the beach with me after the crazy part of the schedule is over and I get some time off? Write down the books, the dresses, and the shoes- oh, the shooooes-”

“I love you,” she said very quietly in his ear before pecking his cheek just in front of it as soon as he sat back again. It wasn’t that he provided some groundbreaking solution to her holiday homesickness and nostalgia for the good old days. It was just incredibly sweet of him to her to list books, dresses, and shoes in that order. Firstly she felt good learning that he was already thinking about using his very limited time off for resting and recharging after the jam-packed holiday football season with her, even after she alluded to her intention to fit some time with him in during the actual holidays. That indicated that he wanted a double-dose. Then he mentioned the first three things that would be on her mind when thinking about what to bring for a little stay at his place in Mallorca- books, because one of her favorite things to do with him was enjoy quiet time in which they could do their own thing but together, without interrupting each other, dresses, because she thrived on making different impressions on him with her outfits, and shoes, because he always poked fun at her for bringing so many shoes on her travels, and because he told her he wanted to go away with her to a place where shoes aren’t necessary, and she kept that in the back of her mind. She kept the idea of traveling anywhere and everywhere with him in the back of her mind. It was the only thing she wanted to be doing that she was not yet doing with her post-Olympics freedom. It also didn’t hurt that his instinct or choice was to pivot to giving reassurances, rather than continue harassing her about complaining instead of coming up with solutions. Juan sat up taller and pressed his chin to his chest to stretch his neck, and his response to her love and her little kiss was delivered with more nonchalance than the rider would have retroactively anticipated.

“I love that you’re like obsessed with me and I actually see you more now than when you lived here,” he said while stretching and looking down at his lap.

“To think people call you humble.”

“Every other week, you’re here, or I’m with you at a horse show.”

“I’m not obsessed. I’m addicted,” Christina stage-whispered behind her hand.

“To what?”

“Your sweaters, obviously.”

“Obviously.”

“And soon, your restaurant’s cheese fries. You should put these on the menu. Forget the wine.” She collected a couple of fries and stuffed them in her mouth to demonstrate her love. They’re getting cold though, she realized, disappointed. And my tummy is getting full. Her watch said she had 15 minutes left to choose between remaining there to watch Tottenham take on Klopp’s team at Wembley and going back to Juan’s to watch it on the couch, or in bed. He was picking over what was left of the fries, and yawned instead of addressing her suggestion. We should go home. I can watch football and nap off this food and then go downstairs to get the stew stuff. “D’you wanna go home for the other game?”

“So you can feed your addiction by touching all my sweaters?”

“So I can feed my addiction to referring to your apartment as “home”.”

The Spaniard calmly grinned in appreciation and winked at the addict. He asked her if she needed to have her remaining fries boxed to go, but she said she just needed the Sant Jeroni and some good bread to dip in the stew later, since the grocery store in his building didn’t bake bread in-house and what they had brought in wasn’t very good, or fresh. They walked two blocks to Juan’s Mercedes and Christina sang to the radio for 15 minutes of pretty light Sunday traffic. The wine went on ice as soon as they got “home”, and they chose the couch for their football viewing. Getting into bed was too dangerous. It posed a risk of them never getting up to make the stew, or do anything else for that matter. Then didn’t stop the friends from changing into comfier clothes and making a nest to share and try not to fall asleep in. They were briefly amused by Tottenham’s ability to totally rip Liverpool apart in the first half-hour, before silently agreeing amongst each other that the home side was scary good, and thus a threat to the Blues’ prospects. On that unspoken but fully realized note, Christina grabbed her phone to check in with André.

“Training?” she wrote as a prompt. Dortmund embarrassed themselves again on Saturday, without him, and he was working with the substitutes and other recovering players on Sunday.

“It was good!! I was just about to msg you. I’m in the cold water. If everything is normal tomorrow, I’m going to be in the squad for the cup,” he wrote back immediately. Awww I’m so happy for him! His wife was seriously thrilled. Finally! It’s been at least twice as long as it was supposed to be. I wish I could hug him right now. I’m gonna give- Oh, yeah. Hmm. Christina wanted to give her partner a great sendoff before he departed for Magdeburg. But her flight got her back to Germany around lunchtime, and he’d already be at training. She couldn’t let him go off to maybe make his comeback without at least a hug, and preferably with a quiet vote of absolute confidence.

“Can I come to Brackel and see you before you go?” she asked, thinking she could go see him just before the team got on the bus for the airport, when she couldn’t interrupt anything important, or be a distraction. Partners and even kids were not banned from Brackel. Wives and girlfriends dropped off and picked up their players all the time, and some even occasionally took in training. Christina met with the team doctor there once, and she even borrowed a room and their TV production crew to film a thank you message for her fans, partners, family, and friends with good production value. She didn’t have a relationship with the facility and its staff like she had at Cobham, but wasn’t a stranger there.

“Are you going to bring me flowers?”

“Hugs.”

“With kisses?”

“Duh.”

“Then yes.”

Yay! I hope I get to give him even better hugs when he comes home Tuesday night, she smiled to herself. I hope he gets to play, and he feels good doing it. I don’t need a goal or an assist or anything. Just for him to feel good in the kit, kicking the ball, being with his teammates...please, she added, glancing up at the ceiling.

“What are you so happy about?” Juan yawned beside her while she reminded André to call her when he was tucking Lukas in for the night.

“Schü might get to play on Tuesday.”

“Yeah? That’s good news.” He sounded genuine when he turned and smiled at her, and she felt a flicker of guilt. It was twofold, because she felt bad that she was under a blanket with another player and longing to be in hugging distance of the one she was married to, and bad that she had to tell Juan how happy she was for another guy. Neither of the guys would have expected any different. They were used to it. It was just weird in that moment. She wished she could be home in Dortmund, but also felt sorry for letting the Spaniard see her get so wrapped up in an André thing. The moment fully illustrated the inherent difficulty and unfairness of their arrangement.

“Yeah,” she mumbled, introspective.

“Will you be there to watch?”

“No. They play away, in the cup. Some third-tier team.”

“That’s perfect to get some time and confidence. I wish him well.”

“Thanks.” Christina let her head fall over onto his right shoulder, and rubbed her right hand up and down and his arm. I believe him. He resents boyfriend for a lot of things but they’re still friends, kinda, and he wants whatever makes me happy too.

“He’s taking Lovren off,” the Chelsea man literally pointed out as the Liverpool center-half made the embarrassing walk toward the sideline well before the halftime whistle. “Harsh.”

“Let’s see if he has a tantrum when he gets to the bench, like...someone I know.”

“Are you ever going to forget that?”

“No.”

“I guess it’s good to have someone who won’t ever let me forget my mistakes.”

“Yes. A good way to learn,” his girlfriend sniggered. “I remind you about them because I love you and want you to do better.”

“Because you love me, eh.” He wasn’t having her joking-but-not-really explanation.

“I love you as much as American chain restaurants love using other food as bread for their food.”

“What?” He definitely wasn’t buying her metaphor.

“Like when they use grilled cheese sandwiches as the bread for a hamburger, or they make a sandwich out of bacon and cheese between two fried chicken cutlets, or they wrap a burrito in a quesadilla.”

“You Americans really love cheese.”

“I love you more than cheese sometimes.” Christina looked up from his shoulder with her doe eyes on. Any man on the receiving end of that look knew he was being played, one way or another.

“I’m not getting up to open the wine.”

“Oh I forgot about that, actually. I’m just trying to make up for getting giddy about Schü before.”

“Nothing to make up, cariña.” He didn’t need to say more than that. She knew deep down that it didn’t upset him when she did things like that, or showed him that she missed her husband, or told him she couldn’t do something because she had plans with him that she didn’t want to break. He was well aware of how she felt about André, and there was no point in ever pretending about it. The opposite situation was the same too.

“I do love you like a fat kid loves a cheeseburger with a pizza bun though.”

“Have you ever ate anything like that?”

“No, but I put macaroni and cheese on an egg sandwich once because it needed cheese and the only cheese I had was leftover macaroni and cheese. Macaroni and cheese burgers are a thing. I think lobster macaroni and cheese burgers are a thing now too. So gross.”

“You’re a thing.”

“Your face is a thing.”

“Why is your face always on my shoulder? You’re not a parrot, cariña.”

“I’m the angel on your shoulder. Duh.”

“Awww.”

“I think your angel needs a nap,” Christina yawned before she began adjusting in her spot for a more reclined position. Liverpool was a mess and didn’t look likely to stage a comeback.

“My angel, not “the” angel?”

“Yes, your angel.”

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royaleflush-blog · 7 years

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Chamonix

I’ve spent the better part of a week in a beautiful little French village called Chamonix. Chamonix is best known for being the journey point for explorers and sportsmen wishing to ski, climb, fly, and otherwise challenge themselves on the great Mt. Blanc, Europe’s tallest mountain.

My journey here started with the wish for freedom. My life took several turns down challenging paths and I was left with a wasteland of responsibilities that I didn’t earn. Tired of my boring dead-end (but very well paying) job, I decided to take an adventure in a place I dreamed about as a child.

I didn’t really care what I was going to do when I got here. I just wanted to live my life on my own terms. Find a great mountain, and perhaps I will find a great man. I decided to learn how to ski with no plan, no instructor, just myself and a lot of unknowns. I spent years questioning my ability, and I’ve finally reached a place in my life where I trust God and trust myself enough to go and do anything. The tough part is done, doing is easy.

My first day in Chamonix, still on jet lag and not having a care in the world, I woke up too late to reach the slopes in time to beat the late-season sun melting the snow. I spent the day purusing the town, getting my french cell phone number working, eating, buying odds and ends I need for travel. All the while I was biding my time for the night life to skulk out from the darkness.

The darkness came and I settled into a bar called Monkey near my hotel for my first beer. Town folk were regulars in this bar, the tourists avoided it. I found tattoo-covered lifetime skiers weren’t interested in being chatted up, so I left quickly for the next venue. I followed the music to a bar next to the town hall. As I approached the windows were covered in wetness from the immense heat and perspiration of a hundred people shoulder to shoulder listening to a Swiss cover band of middle-aged mountain people in a pub with one room and a stage the size of a banquet table. The vibe was life itself; jumping, dancing, smiling, screaming. After a moment I decided this was my time.

Going inside I easily wrestled my way to the bar to order a drink; I am tall and intimidating at 6′4″ or 193 cm, and the crowd parted easily for me. I reached the bar next to the jumping smiling patrons and sat eyeing the tender for 5 or 10 minutes as they busily rushed drinks to the eager skiers who were unwinding after a day of skiing. Not wanting to waste time sipping a beer, I ordered a shot of Grey Goose, neat of course. I had barely paid the bartender by the time I downed the shot.

Ready to party I pushed my way to the middle of the crowd and began dancing to the wonderful up-beat rock tunes, some in English some in French. The lead, a grizzled gray-haired man with a printed t-shirt and shoulder length waves, yelled instructions at the crowd while he drummed. “Put your arm around the people next to you like you have known each other forever,” he said. And so we did, one crowd became lifetime friends and rocked back and force singing at the top of our lungs.

At the unusually early time of 8:30 the band ended their performance and retired, leaving a crowd of soaking wet travelers only wanting more. Out of breath and covered in sweat I ordered another shot of vodka, downed it and staggered outside.

The night was so young! Being alone, I watched the other groups of friends and new acquaintances chat for some time looking for a group that seemed relatable, but failing to find one, I went around the corner and sat on a stone wall. I sat there steaming in the chilly night, only wearing my flannel shirt with its sleeves rolled up. I enviously watched as lovers passed, probably headed home to fuck each other’s brains out. On a night like this I certainly would.

I sat there looking at the dark mountains above, reflecting on how much time I have wasted in my life doing what other people have wanted. I reflected that this is one of the best nights in my life and all I had to do was “say yes”. I vowed that whatever happened in the future, my life would be lived on my terms first, and everything and everyone else second.

After a time, I donned my jacket and went to the pub across the street from the venue I just danced at. It was a casual affair with men and women on holiday from their probably very boring professional lives at home all across the world.

I entered the establishment looking for a beer and began to wait for the bartender once again. However, after some patient waiting for 5 minutes I began to get impatient and as a young professional-seeming woman passed by I eyed her. She said “that is some intense eye contact friend” acknowledging it. I told her “and you as well!” She was apparently going to take a leak in the bathroom next to the bar where I was waiting and while she waited for her turn we chatted.

The woman, as it turns out was an Australian living in Geneva, we spent a few minutes getting to know each other as the man inside the bathroom took his time. After learning I was alone, she invited me eagerly to her table with her friends. While I waited for her to get out of the bathroom and lead the way, two more men introduced themselves. Blake, a financial analyst from Australia, living in London, and another man who’s name escapes me who was the founder of HBO Now Sweden.

While I chatted, Cat passed by and I told her I’d meet her outside after I was done chatting. I finished my conversation with the Swede and proceeded outside to find Cat’s group, unfortunately lacking the beer I came to buy in the first place. After staring awkwardly at dark faces for a minute, I found her group and to my surprise Blake who I also met in the bathroom line was part of her entourage. It turns out waiting around places where people wait to go pee is a great place to meet interesting people.

The other friend in Cat and Blake’s entourage is a young man from Kazakhstan, who’s name was to complex to remember, and who Blake later told me was the CFO of a large oil company based there. We chatted egregiously about cultural difference. The man from Kazakhstan told us about his exploits skiing and the national sport of Kazakhstan, which is apparently a game sort of like rugby, except instead of a ball there is a live sheep.

None of us having eaten, we decided to go to a local burger joint down the street. The Kazakhstan man told us he would meet us there, and so Cat, Blake, and myself strolled down the night.

After bantering playfully with Cat the whole evening, she had the tell-tale signs of being attracted to me, but was still playing coy with her good friend Blake in tow. I wasn’t sure if they were together, and I didn’t really care. The night was going great and sex need not be on the table for me to enjoy it fully.

Arriving at the burger place, we found it had just closed and they were cleaning up. Defeated, our small group of strangers wandered defeated in the square adjoining the restaurant considering other options and we settled on pizza.

I told the group I knew a great place, the place where the local kids go, and directed them to the small Italian semi-formal eatery I had eaten delicious mushroom fondue at the prior evening that was in the adjoining square. The place claimed to be a Pizzaria; don’t ask why I ate fondue there, I don’t know either. I did know I had seen multiple discerning teenagers get pizza to go as I munched on stringy cheese covered bread, so it must be good.

I lead the group to the establishment and said “Hi, I’ve brought friends!” to the waiter who recognized me from the night before. We sat down at a table and considered the options. Blake seemed increasingly defensive as I flirted with Cat about Pizza options, Cat cruelly ignoring him and asking me a bevy of questions, most of which I riposte back to her like a master fencer. We settled on our Pizza, ham for them and ham and mushrooms for me.

As we waited for our Pizzas to cook, Blake took interest in my signet ring, a gold ring with a large flat carnelian gem. He assumed wrongly the ring meant I am from some important family who passes rings down from father to son to signify inheritance of family leadership. I love the idea, and do have blood from several distinguished families, but my ring is for me and me alone. Not wanting to waste a good opportunity though, I coyly told him I couldn’t tell him about it, as would be common for an elite man wishing to remain under cover.

Cat saw my resistance and began drilling me over the ring. It was honestly quite funny to see them be so insistent to know which dynasty they were in the presence of. They would probably be unhappy knowing it was MY dynasty, but I continued to segue on the ring as to not waste the wonderful opportunity for my own comical enjoyment.

The pizza came and was delicious. I had teased Cat that New York pizza was the best and this couldn’t be close, which she had bitten onto and admitted she had never tried NY pizza. Admittedly though, it was great pizza. Spicy, crunchy, and not drippy, it was thoroughly enjoyable.

As we chat, at one point Blake got up to go to the bathroom, and I took the opportunity to ask Cat about their relationship status, knowing fairly well the answer already. She told me they weren’t together and were just friends. It turned out my assumption was correct that they were either friends with benefits or poor Blake was madly in love with her and she was toting him around as a toy. I was leaning toward the later. Poor Blake.

We left the Pizza restaurant bound for a new drinking venue to finish the night at, and as we went out the door I took Cat’s arm and direct us to Monkey, my first venue of the night. She left her arm in mine for a moment and took it out as we strolled in Monkey’s direction. Meanwhile Blake tows behind questioning the decision to go to Monkey; it is too far away; this was the wrong way. I kept walking knowing if I wanted to seal the deal with Cat, I had to make it easier to go to my flat than her flat with Blake.

We went down a street toward Monkey that got darker and quieter and Blake continued to question if we were going in the right direction. We reached a round-about I didn’t recognize and I admitted to the group I wasn’t sure which way to go, a solid mistake, seeing as I checked later, if I had trusted my instincts I would have ended up at Monkey, but that’s not how the night worked out. Blake won and we went back the way we came to our original bar. The night was far from over though, in fact it had barely begun.

To be continued...

#freedom real travel france chamonix people experiences dancing drinking

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williamsjoan · 5 years

Text

Double Cross Review — An Inter-Dimensional Extravaganza Made Boring

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“The game is not poorly designed or broken, it even has some good ideas, it’s just painfully unoriginal and ultimately boring.”

“Still, none of these [mechanics] feel wholly original or even superior to what’s present in Double Cross’ contemporaries in any way, which makes Double Cross feel derivative to a fault.”

“Double Cross ultimately plays things too safe to its own determent with mechanics that can be found, and are done better, elsewhere.”

The post Double Cross Review — An Inter-Dimensional Extravaganza Made Boring by Tomas Franzese appeared first on DualShockers.

Double Cross Review — An Inter-Dimensional Extravaganza Made Boring published first on https://timloewe.tumblr.com/

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williamsjoan · 5 years

Text

Double Cross Review — An Inter-Dimensional Extravaganza Made Boring

youtube

“The game is not poorly designed or broken, it even has some good ideas, it’s just painfully unoriginal and ultimately boring.”

“Still, none of these [mechanics] feel wholly original or even superior to what’s present in Double Cross’ contemporaries in any way, which makes Double Cross feel derivative to a fault.”

“Double Cross ultimately plays things too safe to its own determent with mechanics that can be found, and are done better, elsewhere.”

The post Double Cross Review — An Inter-Dimensional Extravaganza Made Boring by Tomas Franzese appeared first on DualShockers.

Double Cross Review — An Inter-Dimensional Extravaganza Made Boring published first on https://timloewe.tumblr.com/

0 notes